#[ icb i had to be hurt like this. and for what. for WHAT. ]

[1327-1]

just found some of my old accounts and stuff that i made and realized i made something with scrolling textures. what the fuck was i doing in 2011

[walkswithmyfather]

Genesis 50:20 (NLT). “You intended to harm me, but God intended it all for good. He brought me to this position so I could save the lives of many people.”

Genesis 50:20 (ICB). “You meant to hurt me. But God turned your evil into good. It was to save the lives of many people. And it is being done.”

“All for Good” By Wendy Richmond:

“Sometimes when you are going through difficult things it’s hard to see the good. What good can come out of a bad situation? Surely that’s what Joseph was thinking. Things started out quite innocent. He was just a 17-year-old boy with a dream when his brothers threw him into a pit and then sold him into slavery.

For the next thirteen years, Joseph experienced one difficult situation after another. He was lied about, thrown into prison, and forgotten. But God’s favor was on Joseph and the Lord gave him a special ability to interpret dreams.

At the age of 30, Joseph was summoned from prison to interpret Pharaoh’s dream. Because God gave Joseph the ability to interpret the dream, he was made second in command in all of Egypt. Then the famine came.

Enter Joseph’s brothers. They came to Egypt looking for food and bowed down to Joseph just like they did in the dream he had as a youth. You would think Joseph would have been furious. They were the ones responsible for all his hardships. It was their actions that landed him in prison.

But instead of being angry, Joseph recognized the sovereignty of God. “You intended to harm me,” Joseph tells his brothers, “but God intended it all for good. He brought me to this position so I could save the lives of many people.”

Even though God did not cause the difficulties in Joseph’s life, He used them for good and for His glory. You may not see the good right now but don’t lose hope. God turned things around for Joseph and He can turn them around for you.“

[milaisreading]

🌱🩷: this is dramatic for absolutely no reason. Icb😭 pt2

Warnings: Reader uses she/her. Reader is Isagi's older sister here. Requests are open

⚽️Blue Lock belongs to Muneyuki Kaneshiro and Yusuke Nomura⚽️

"I hope you go to hell." (Y/n) sent Oliver a side-glare, as the boy chuckled and moved closer to her as they walked down the street.

"Come on, (Y/n). You know you missed our dates~"

"Oh yes... I completely missed all the times you would ignore me to flirt with a waitress." The older Isagi glared at the boy, moving further away from him.

"If you come near me, even a little, I will scream."

Oliver's smirk turned into a frown and he sighed, moving away a little as well. There was a short silence as the duo walked down the street, with Oliver sending her looks from time to time.

"Why... why did you want to meet me? Wasn't talking at the bowling alley a few days ago enough?" (Y/n) finally spoke up, earning nervous look from Oliver. Which was a first from him.

"No... I missed talking to ya, and the bowling alley conversation definitely wasn't enough. Especially with your brother glaring at me the whole time."

"I support him in that. To be honest, you deserved way worse."

Oliver sighed at her answer, already expecting no sympathy from her.

"I am sorry... I really am sorry for leaving you like that-"

"You broke up with me via a text message... on the day of our anniversary. No amount of 'I am sorry' will make me forgive or forget that."

The boy flinched at that as (Y/n) glared at him, then turned to look at the road ahead of them. The silence between them was awkward, but (Y/n) liked it. It gave her a chance to de-stress a little.

'Asshole!' She sent a glance towards Oliver, inspecting his face for a moment.

'But he is a handsome one... stupid! Why do you think like that over someone who clearly doesn't care for you...' She scolded herself.

Meanwhile, Oliver was lost in his own thoughts.

'Shit... I really messed it up back then... I wonder if I can make it better in anyway, show her that I really regret it.' Oliver sighed as they approached a restaurant.

"Let's go and have dinner here. It's on me-"

"I can pay for my own food." (Y/n) cut him off, but agreed to have dinner there.

"Of course you can. But, let me cover it tonight-"

"We aren't on a date, Aiku." She reminded him as they walked into the restaurant.

"I am sure you have a girl or two on who you can spend your money on instead." As much as it hurt her to say that, (Y/n) couldn't not say it. The scene at the karaoke bar still hurt her.

'I don't expect him to love or care for me after everything... but to think that I still didn't move on properly and he just...'

Oliver just sighed and kept quiet, knowing right now wasn't the best time to argue about it.

'I screwd up royally... just what could make her see I still care?'

After an awkward dinner and some dry conversations after, they were returning home. (Y/n) was glad that the night was coming to an end.

'I just want to take a bath and forget all of this had happened.'

"Hey... can we talk for a moment?" Oliver suddenly spoke up, grabbing (Y/n)'s wrist to stop her from walking.

"What now?" She asked in a bored manner, removing her first from his hold.

"I... I know you hate me, and I deserve it. I was an ass towards you at the end of the relationship, but..." Oliver stopped, trying to gather his own thoughts as (Y/n) just stared at him with a curious expression.

"But?"

"I... I really do like you. And as short as our relationship was, I really miss it."

(Y/n)'s eyes widened at that, and she just kept staring at Oliver. She couldn't bring herself to say anything at the moment. I mean... what could she say?

"Back then, I wasn't in a good headspace and was going nowhere with my own skills. I didn't want to burden you with all of it... you deserved better. Not a guy who can barely keep himself in line. I realized my mistake, and I wish we could return back to how it was."

(Y/n) felt her eyes sting a little as her hands twitched a little at his words.

"I will do whatever it takes, and wait for however long you want me to, just for us to be together again-"

A loud slap echoed through the street and Oliver flinched and grabbed his reddened cheek.

"(Y/n)..."

"And.... and you couldn't bring yourself to talk to me?" She let out a few sobs.

'She is crying?' Oliver blinked.

"I... you are the worst! Do you know how painful it was when I read that message?! All because... all because you couldn't man up to say how you felt... I..." She buried her face into her palms and Oliver tried to move closer to her.

"Hey... I'm sorry. I don't like seeing you cry-"

"Forget it. I don't want to talk to you anymore." (Y/n) moved away from Oliver and turned around to run away.

"I don't want to look or talk to you... whatever you wanted to say, save it! I just hope the next girl you date... you will love her enough to talk things out."

Before Oliver could say anything or grab her hand, (Y/n) ran off. Her face still buried in her palms.

Oliver felt something break in him as he watched her run off from him. It hurt more than when he broke up with her.

"But I love you-"

"Oliver Aiku! The hell did you do to my sister?!"

The boy shook his head and turned to look at the younger Isagi in surprise. The boy staring at the captain with resentment and rage.

"Isagi... what are you doing here?"

"The better question is what did you do to my sister? Why is she crying, you hag?!" Isagi's glare got more intense as he approached the dumbfounded and heartbroken boy.

'I am such an idiot... I hate him and love him at the same time. Why am I doing this to myself?' (Y/n) thought while walking down the street and trying to wipe her tears away.

'I hate you. I hate you. I hate you.' She thought back at the purple/green-eyed boy.

"And yet I still can't-"

She cut herself off as another body collided into hers, causing the stranger to fall down and her to stumble to the side.

"Ha?!" (Y/n) let out a surprised gasp and removed her hands from her face.

"Can't you watch where you are going, idiot?"

The girl's eyes widened in surprise as teal eyes stared back up at her.

'Itoshi... Sae?! He is still in Japan?!' (Y/n) thought in surprise while looking at the annoyed boy.

[love-killed-the-superstar]

The Last Ronin 2: Re-Evolution Issue #1 LIVEBLOG

SPOILERS ABOUND. I'M NOT GOING TO BE NORMAL ABOUT THIS IT'LL PROBABLY GET SUPER LONG

Okay so Casey Marie's muscles are something I'm never going to get over. SHE LOOKS GOOD!!!!! Her getup is feeling a little too reminiscent of a cape-wielding superhero for my tastes to be honest - I really loved the more practical outfits she wore in TLR Lost Years, especially in issue 4 when she was running the training mission for the kids. But ah well, I'm sure this will grow on me. It may not be practical (edna's law of no capes is coming to mind, also PLEASE TIE YOUR HAIR UP WHEN YOU'RE FIGHTING GIRL!!!) but it's very cunty anyway which I appreciate

Straight up thought she killed this guy - what was that sound effect if he's still able to walk??? I fr thought she snapped his neck

IDK if we needed a whole 8 pages of punching and kicking to exposition dump what we kinda already knew from what's been shown in the lost years (esp the lost day special) but IT'S FINE IG... NOW ONTO THE BABIES

SORRY, SORRY. TEENAGERS NOW.

GIGGLING KICKING MY FEET. We're ALREADY getting the leo-v-raph adjacent dynamic with these two and I'm living for it. if one of them drops a stone cold 'fearless leader' jab i will lose my shit

HI? HELLO, EXCUSE ME, MIND-TALKING? PICTURES IN HEAD? ARE WE A FAMILY THAT LUCID DREAMS OR SOMETHING?!?? I DON'T REMEMBER THIS BEING SOMETHING THEY COULD DO?? every new speech bubble here is like a punch to the gut, wdym telepathy wdym secret lair wdym honouring everything master splinter taught you???? (although i'm proud that when this panel dropped on news sites i was immediately like THAT ISN'T THE KITCHEN FROM LOST YEARS. turns out it was a Secret Lair TM)

Teenage Mutant Ninja Seance -- TURTLES COUNT IT OFF!!

not gonna screenshot the whole backstory but they're basically doing a telepathic puppet show explaining the backstory and it's pretty much the mirage origins with a bit of extra tlr flair. as always it HURTS ME seeing the turtles dying so thanks for that tlr2 :'')) icb these kids watch a mind movie of their uncles dying every fucking night. yall are messy

SOBBING AND CRYING,, I WISH YOU'D ALL HAD THE CHANCE TO KNOW HIM TOO!!!!!! I WISH YOU'D GOTTEN TO KNOW ALL OF THEM!!!!! (tlr splinter doesnt count tho because hes a dick)

there was a cool sequence of them rooftop hopping n stuff but i wont cover it bc we already saw it in a bunch of news articles weeks ago

i just did the SHARPEST INHALE. casey marie you and your beautiful muscular arms have aged like the finest wine

YI NO!!!!!

lmaooo moja is JUDGING your taste in women u two

lots of text... blah blah blah jobs, crimerates, blah blah... jiro in pig uniform jumpscare.. casey marie i thought u were going to fix him :(((

YESSSSS KIDS ARE GOING ON A MISSION WITH THEIR MOM, LETS FUCKING GOOOOO

MY BABIES ARE KICKING ASS!!!!!

....,.HUH

WHAT THE FUCK HAPPENED TO MY BABY BOY ODIE!!!!!!!!!!! WHO DID THIS TO HIM!!!!!!???? WHAT??!???? HUH/1?!!? EXCUSE ME????

I'M . LIKE WHAT DO I EVEN SAY TO THIS. IT CAME OUT OF NOWHERE??? WHAT IS GOING ON!!!

FINAL THOUGHTS:

dude that first issue was wordy but the kids were ON POINT. they were so fun!! their dialogue is fun and they kick ass.

i loved yi announcing the punishment for casey while the others were like NOO SHE DIDNT MEAN THAT DONT LISTEN TO HER. we're getting more of their personalities and it's great!! it was a nice throwback to issue 2 of lost years when they were cleaning - yi refused to help because of how strictly she was following instructions. im picking up that she might be neurodivergent but i did get that from the lost years too - only doing things within strict instructions, getting frustrated at teaching odyn chess, not because of him playing horseys with the knights but that it was Against The Rules Of Chess - and now not picking up on some social cues. It's nice to see!! I love her very much, but it feels like besides rehashing the origin story she took a bit of a backseat to the other three.

i want to know more about why uno said being a rebel was moja's 'thing', since she didn't seem to be any more rebellious than the other three in this issue. we didn't get any unique interactions between her and casey marie which is what i felt was lacking from lost years but i wonder if this is hinting towards a more turbulent mother-daughter dynamic with them... I REALLY HOPE SO!! her and uno butting heads in a leo-raph way is very fun - i don't mind one or two prior group dynamics leaking into the new turtle siblings because they're all so different from the original 4.

uno seems to be taking on slightly more of a leader role than moja so i think he won the title of fearless leader. which is fine, i think it'll be fun to see and he's definitely less of an asshole now than when he was growing up in lost years. still picking on odyn a bit but seems to snipe at moja just as much. even when he was commenting on yi's storytelling he didn't make fun of her, though - i think she may have inherited the 2k3 don ability of being Completely Unbullyable.

i was really pleased that odyn felt more involved!! i feel like he took the backseat a few times in lost years - it was fun seeing more of his personality shine through! he and yi seem to get on the best, and i giggled at them rolling their eyes at moja and uno's raph-leo schtick. i didn't expect him to TURN TO FUCKING STONE THOUGH, so i'm nervous about that. WHAT DOES IT MEAN? WHO DID THIS TO MY BOY? IS HE GOING TO TURN BACK NEXT CHAPTER OR IS HE OUT OF COMMISSION UNTIL THE END OF THE RUN??? (if it's the latter i'll be a bit annoyed - don't take odyn away from the equation please!!)

I do wonder if by introducing casually that they can PSYCHICALLY CONNECT, the turtles will use that as a technique to reach odyn's mind to make sure he's still in there and piece together what's happened to him. i mean, their casual telepathy has gotta be some sort of chekhov's gun right?

and shit.... april was so fucking mad casey took the babies out so she's going to EXPLODE when she finds out what happened to her baby boy, her beloved favourite, her baby odyn :''(( im giggling rubbing my hands together waiting for the fallout but also if she cries i might cry too. speaking of april, she seems to be working on a new project and i saw nano particles mentioned - are we going to have a roninverse version of nano in this run???? I NEED MY ROBOT SON

as always, casey marie... u have aged like fine wine. u are stunning. disappointed that ur still believing that jiro can do good as a cop when their entire police force and government is corrupt as fuck. just feels very naive of her. i'm excited to see her break down at the concept of losing odyn - in fact i need everyone to mourn this beautiful kid. they tell us so much that shes a super clingy helicopter mom and i am picking up on the strict part, but it would be nice to see more of her just... hugging her kids. holding them. i get why she didnt in this issue but id love more mama casey squishing their cheeks and kissing their foreheads.

i have zero fucking clue what's going on with odyn. im wondering if it's somehow related to nano, or to whatever project April is working on - she says it's to do with clearing the tunnels, but I''m not convinced. who knows, there might be some ulterior motive happening.

Anyway, that's the end of my liveblog!! thanks for reading all the way to the end... go read it wherever you read ur comics!!!

[jewishbarbies]

hi im not sure what im doing here but, can you help me? please.

i am genuinely so lost right now. i have been a swiftie for years and her songs have kept me going and holding on to life when i felt like letting go. her songs and the stories she shared via them esp with folklore and evermore were safe spaces.

but this shit with MH threw me off the fucking ocean and i don't even know how to swim. as a woc swiftie (i dont even want to identify as her fan anymore), seeing what taylor is doing rn fucking hurts. IT HURTS.

she inspired me so much and i admired her and saw her as like a role model. but with this recent shit show i was informed of her past actions or lack thereof and icb i didn't know about those all these years.

but really thinking on it now, im realizing that her feminism is severely lacking in intersectionality. ig there was a voice in me that had this concern for sometime but i always ignored it bc my naive self trusted taylor and thst in time she will finally do more than the bare minimum.

this is not coherent. i am so empty and feel so numbed. i want to grieve but i feel like doing so will cement the fact that i have to leave her. to discard of all traces of her in my life which is like getting rid of huge chunk of my life.

ig what im hoping rn is if u have any tips on how to do this? i saw while going through the anti ts tag that you were once her fan. can you help guide me through this breakup?

THIS FUCKING SUCKS I JUST SAID I WAS NUMB BUT NOW MY TEARS ARE FUCKING FREE FALLING I HATE HATE THIS SO MUCH

FUCK YOU TSYLOR FUCK YOU FUCK YOY VERY MUCH. YOU BETRSYRD ME FUCK YOU FOREVER

you were the last person i expected to break my heart like this. no one ever came close to. i thought being queer and living in a homophobic country would save me from going through a breakup bc ill never get in a relationship anyway but ig was fuxking wrong

im sorry for sending this rant. i'd really appreciate any help for dealing with this.

don’t apologize! I’m so sorry you’re having to go through this. what helped me was finding other music with similar vibes to replace her music with in my head, and doing a complete detox on her. like not listening to any of it as long as it takes to not feel like I need to. once I did that, I realized it wasn’t as important to me as I had convinced myself it was. that might not work for everyone but it’s the only advice I have to give. I hope you find some comfort in something that fills the void.

[pinkseas]

[parasocial bestie] am going thru hte ask and methinks everything's settled and now we can go bac to square one of our routine braining i think <333 ALSO I SAW THE POST ABT THE. DNI with me unless you are a perfect clone of me like REAL SO REAL altho we have diff interpretation on things icb i did manage to find someone out of pure coincidence who likes 98% of what i like abt xlmi and genshin in entirely i just <3333333 like EEEEEEEEEEEEEE i finally have a reason to take my mind off twitter. tumlr ur always hte man 4 me. anyway

"its just part of his life part of his duty nothing more and nothing less. but that doesnt stop the shame that comes with anything he perceives as failure" OH GOD YEAH THAT IS SUCH AN EXCEPTION he holds high standards of what he does to ppl but not what he does for himself. it just feels so fucking painful abt xiao's character never considering himself in everything Except when it comes to other ppl to the point he goes for self sacrifice is SO!!! and yet what he does hold such noble intentions of a selfless hero even by the means of thankless acts, that he'll never be a figure to be worshipped and known as much as other adepti do. "After living for so long... to die in the act of saving others would not have been a terrible thing." is always a line that gets me about his character in entirety that he really needs to see things in another perspective too.

"it may not be the Main focus but zhongli and xiao's relationship in this fic is basically the second biggest focus beyond xiao himself/the xiaolumi of it all tbh" even before The Brainrot Festivals GOD WE ARE SHARING THE BRAIN. ive always had this impression since the start i knew of xiao those years ago, how important zhongli is as that certain figure in his life; a master a mentor a guardian just someone who reflect on his life for experiencing the same thing. but xiao doesnt know that well about zhongli, about morax, and how much the guy's changed and felt the need itd be better for xiao himself to change too. it doesnt have to be the same, for what zhongli tries to teach him, it had to be something that makes his life at least, if not bearable, is simply for xiao to be comfortable and free of suffering bc the guy doesnt let himself to. and dkfksajhdas i explore this sm though brainrots and all the different scenarios like when i told u about them going fishing, and then there's the very Very important chain of events i had in mind how it is when xiao coped about rex lapis' death and what happened after knowing.

it's a little embarrassing to explain how but like yknow my tendency to just Hurt Xiao in ways not completely whump but in a form of vulnerability he truly needs that attention and care bc of his routines and duty are slowly eating him inside out. vulnerabilities of his emotional detachment affecting his body that makes him so human. i think abt how he supresses so much in the past pre-morax he genuinely doesnt know how to express anymore, and when he does, its a sensation so overwhelming that his body isnt used to it anymore with the catharsis all the fight and flight responses the adrenaline giving him the chest pain of just,.. having emotions yknow. and the death of the yakshas the disappearance of bosacius all had different magnitudes of emotion that the death of rex lapis affected him so much being the last straw of it all, how it all crashes down when exuvia fell and not rising back up again giving him that strong reaction then he Overworks To Cope.

then comes the time zhongli came to the balcony (in canon he reveals the truth in dreams,.. but i Like the two that they have a diff confrontation bc of how much zhongli knows xiao back then until the present) to tell everything, just for the revelation to hit xiao like a truck the pain the catharsis the exhaustion Everything hes been through the past few days where zhongli prolonged saying the truth now hit him that his body couldnt take it all and just shuts down. like boom he collapsed. and that's not a good reaction at all, and yet the yaksha recovers (as much as he managed, despite how weak it rendered him), assuring he's ok, trying to dismiss it with the same numbness that plagued him since morax saved him. back to square one. mf factory resetted himself, starting over. rex lapis is alive and thats good in all things thats it, all the unwilling attempts in processing it are now useless. and it brings a whole new story of how zhongli sees this all unfold altogether.

and i just,... shniffsniff....... think about what comes after, bc zhongli is not gonna let that slide even if he's pretending as a mortal even if he has to spend most of his time in the harbor since he wants to, but he also wants the best for xiao; the only one who hasnt let go of the past and accept change like the adepti does bc he doesnt know how. and its through the little things; giving the remedium, be it through posting or directly to the inn (id like to think verr goldet is the only one who knows by mere guess hes rex lapis, but respects his decision to step down no matter the reason, and zhongli trusts her immensely on the secret in exchange he becomes that special balcony visitor. an unspoken agreement o both of them.), the times xiao blacks out from karma and he wakes up on bed in his personal room in the inn with cold tea by the bedside. when he finishes his battle in the middle of heavy rain, drenched and cold, and he feels the bullets on his shoulder stop from the shield of an umbrella behind him; zhongli doesnt say anything more than to advise him of proper shelter nearby. when he finds xiao curled up, knees on his chest in his own needed respite, in pain but also in shame, zhongli takes the time to simply kneel and pat his head and keep him company until xiao can quietly teleport away. like god do you have any idea how much i love the thought of parental zhongli or at least a zhongli who Cares like can you tell

anyway icb thats enough for me to go on 4 paragraphs longer than i intended OK MOVING ON EVERYTHING YOU EXPLAIN ABOUT XIAOS WINGS,... GOD its the way it makes sense it makes so much sense he'd rather have any semblance of his past severed to build himself anew but its kinda funny too. that he intends as such and yet he also doesnt; still thinking himself as sinful as he was as the bloodhound who deserves all the punishment when the whole point of starting anew is Not Doing That and actually continue as a fresh warrior with new roles and new things to do without counting the past. like WHAT BRO

personally id go for the first one bc i still like the thought he keeps them for the mere sentimentality and i feel like he wouldnt bear to lose the only thing he wants to hold on about a childhood he lost before, even if he doesnt remember it. the mere thought of it existing providing him that sort of painful comfort its still there, even if seeing it hurts knowing he cant taste the joy of flight anymore. having flight being out of reach and he'd have constant reminders of it is just that little sign xiao never really moved forward even in the beginning o)-( he doesnt even summon it after it recovered, doesnt even pay attention while people tended it, only finding the solace of it existing at his back. and yknow for the Pain Points i actually thought that after it had been mangled so bad xiao never actually showed it to anyone its condition despite his human body recovered and he purposely Dismisses Its There than just Knowing, and its only when the pain of it being untreated becomes unbearable and at the right topic being brought up did he reveal them. guizhong had been so terrified of its condition, so pitied and devastated that they werent told and xiao was so small so young hes a child hes a child and he revealed them without an change in his expression to the moment he falls from the pain. the way he speaks of his wings as a mere fact it existed. and at some point in her grief to him she felt the need to just,.. restore his flight by making mechanical wings bc she just knew his real ones wont support him anymore even after treatment. and morax himself shared the exact sentiment, the two standing forlornly and the half-progress blueprints guizhong spent day and night in her tears to just give xiao back what he lost.

other bits im just AUUUUUUUUEUEUHUSHFVUFBKDSHFKJSDFKH SO TRUE SO TRUE UEEEEEEEEEEE CUS I RAN OUT OF BRAIN JUICE WRITING THE OTHERS. like i hope u get da message. i rlly spend everything on two things JDFHKSDJFHKSDJH ok but wait "learning to feel human learning to live as mortal people do learning the values of life itself learning how to love the little things" LIKE MAN....................................... also giggling wit u thats the problem on the theory when 500 yrs had passed then wats the use of scouting, hows the other world going bro? 500 yrs late and alrd destroyed? yeah

teehee

"i finally have a reason to take my mind off twitter" YEAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH and in the end isnt that the most important thing of all… LMAO no but genuinely so so so glad bc ur right the sheer Coincidence of liking so many of the same aspects of this game i love it so bad we're so cool and epic for this fr

"never considering himself in everything Except when it comes to other ppl to the point he goes for self sacrifice" yeah o(-( THE NOBLE INTENTIONS THE THANKLESS ACTS… dies a little bit. AND YEAH THAT FUCKING LINE KILLS ME EVERY TIME ITS SO. IM SO. IM SO.

"a master a mentor a guardian" HE IS SO IMPORTANT TO XIAO AND THEY ARE SO IMPORTANT TO ME !!!!!!!!! and ohhh my god xiao not realizing how much has changed and that zhongli thinks itd be for the better if xiao changed too… trying to teach him how to be comfortable and how to suffer less………..

"my tendency to just Hurt Xiao in ways not completely whump but in a form of vulnerability he truly needs" NO BC UR SO BASED FOR THIS imo xiao is like. either a) you have to really Get In There and take his walls down brick by brick with so much patience and care, or b) something uncontrollable has to come in and smash those walls to pieces all at once, to the point where he needs the help from others where he has no choice but to let people in and be vulnerable around them. specific people cant really try to force it, i REALLY dont think that would work at all i think thatd make things so much worse, but either lots of patience and care or smth that isnt done Purposefully By Anyone Else for the sake of him opening up yknow??

"bc his routines and duty are slowly eating him inside out" NO BEACUSE YEAH. YEAH. GOD. his karma :handshake: his duty settling on his shoulders consuming his life eating away at him so slowly but surely. and what would he do without them? who would he be without them? he doesnt even know. he thinks there'd be nothing left but there'd be so much and then so much room for him to grow, too, and i just. i just. fmgnmdfngmfdg.

THE CHEST PAIN OF EMOTIONS repressing so much he literally just doesnt know what to do with it im so. Explodes. that last fucking straw after centuries of hardship is something that can be so. AND XIAO TRYING TO DISMISS IT WHEN HE FLAT OUT COLLAPSES being ashamed to have been so """weak""" as for that to have happened going back to square one with feeling numb im so. and the way that changes zhongli's perception of everything ohhhhh my god. xiao going from someone so strong and resilient, every bad thing seemingly rolling off without stopping him, only to realize that while he is strong and he is resilient everything that he seemed to have dealt with on his own has just. made its way into his chest and festered there, buried and ignored and rotting, eating him alive bit by bit.

"but he also wants the best for xiao, the only one who hasnt let go of the past and accepted change like the adepti do bc he doesnt know how" THISSSS he doesnt know how. god. GOD. xiao seemingly so detached from the past, he himself not realizing just how much he clings to it the fact that he's still living in it something something a house on fire something something being so used to something that you dont realize its not supposed to hurt this much, its not supposed to feel this way.

"(id like to think verr goldet is the only one who knows by mere guess hes rex lapis)" THIS FUCKS i support this wholeheartedly it makes a lot of sense and mmmmm the mutual respect and trust they have for one another even unspoken…. the care they have for xiao the gratitude that someone is looking after him in ways they themselves are unable to do…. explodes.

BLACKING OUT AND WAKING UP ON HIS BED ohhh my god. there is osmething So Personal about all of that about zhongli not always actively Doing Something or Saying Anything but just BEING there being around xiao showing that he cares that xiao isnt alone. fuck. I CAN TELL AND I LOVE IT SO BAD ITS SO GOOD idk i like. i rly liked the idea?? but it takes more of a push for me to really Think About and brainrot parental characters or guardian figures and everything youve ever said abt them has made me go from "yeah that fucks, nice" to "yeah that FUCKS let me think about every scenario ever on earth with them now" which i am so grateful for <3333

"still thinking of himself as sinful as he was as the bloodhound who deserves all punishment when the whole point of starting anew is Not Doing That" YEAHHHHH man said alright let me sever all ties let me cut myself loose. except for every awful thing i have ever done which will live with me in my heart forever amen. king PLEASE

and god yeah wanting to hold on even without remembering it, that painful comfort the constant reminder of what he once had and never will again and IT BEING A SIGN THAT HE NEVER TRULY MOVED FORWARD…. man. Man. guizhong being so horrified and sympathetic, mourning for him when he cannot mourn for himself, MECHANICAL WINGS……. thinks so hard about those blueprints gathering dust, not quite perfected, eternally unfinished. thinks so hard about the traveler someday stumbling across them, or zhongli after his retirement digging them up again, either way them going to each other with the knowledge and searching for someone who could help make them a reality, working with perhaps inventors from fontaine and getting venti's blessing similarly to how its his power that allows the wind gliders to work (i think??) and using the traveler's knowledge from other worlds and familiarity with flight and determination to help xiao regain what was lost.

i like to think that where lumine is awfully fond of nature aether excels with machinery, maybe she could use what she'd learned from him or maybe he himself In The Aftermath if things go well enough could help and just. god. polishing up those finishing touches making them work testing them out. xiao being able to fly again. xiao healing enough mentally to be able to bring himself to even try fly again.

[echologname]

When you see these things, you will be happy.You will grow like the grass.The Lord’s servants will see his power.But the Lord’s enemies will see his anger. Look, the Lord is coming with fire.The Lord’s armies are coming with clouds of dust.He will punish those people with his anger.He will punish them with flames of fire. The Lord will judge the people with fire.He will destroy many people with his sword.He will kill many people. “These people make themselves holy and pure to go to worship their false gods in their gardens. They follow each other into their special gardens. They eat the meat of pigs and rats and other hated things. But they will all be destroyed together,” says the Lord. “I know they have evil thoughts and do evil things. So I am coming to punish them. I will gather all nations and all people. All people will come together and see my glory.

https://www.biblegateway.com/passage/?search=Isa.66.14,Isa.66.15,Isa.66.16,Isa.66.17,Isa.66.18&version=ICB

I don't recall God punishing me when I decided to reject Christianity and try witchcraft (don't judge, I couldn't believe it either because I had loved God my whole life. While I was going through something traumatic, demons kept pestering to me and lying to me and I couldn't make it stop until I mentally and emotionally snapped after months and began to self harm.)

During the REALLY difficult years of this period, God saved me multiple times, protected me, answered my prayers and fought for me. I only suffered because of my own self inflicted stress and consequences for foolishness (I was just a teen, I think I can be forgiven for a rebellious, depressed, immature and stubborn phase). But I was STILL His. I was STILL His child, His chosen servant. I was never His enemy. He kept knocking on that door waiting for me to open it again. Kept trying to reach me though I was in the clutches of evil and had become blind and deaf to notice Him. So God loved me. He knew how to reach me where preaching at church failed (I was too hurt and stubborn to listen or understand). He showed me how my Mom loved me and how I loved my dogs was what He thought and felt for me, but even moreso. I would do anything for my pups and for God to love me MORE?! It's inconceivable! 😮

I didn't have a big revelation that instantly brought me back, it was little things over years that slowly added up. I'd say my "revelation" moment was recently when I thought my tachycardia was literally killing me and it'd be the end, for real this time. I was sick, miserable and scared and just wanted healing, just to not feel like I was constantly on the verge of a heart attack. So, this past December 31st, I laid in bed and decided I was going to beg to be crucified with Christ, since I hadn't asked since coming back, it was like we bonded again like we always had when I was a kid, like nothing happened. I asked Jesus to come into my poor broken body and share in my suffering and remake me holy and just stay with me and never leave me because that was my deepest desire, to not be alone and it's only recently that I've pieced together that I already have that and always will. It's one thing to be told, "God's always with you," ANOTHER to see firsthand His presence in my life and how He's always had a hand on EVERYTHING, every crazy, scary, stressful thing! To know HE'S the reason, that car only scratched me, as I walked across the street and the distracted driver didn't stop. HE'S the reason, that high woman didn't harm me and neither did that criminal I was in the car with (I didn't know at the time). HE'S the reason I never froze all the times I walked alone in northern USA winter and ALWAYS made it back home safe no matter how far I wandered into the city. (Seriously, don't judge me walking alone in a big city, I had no car and couldn't drive).

I'm saying, God, WAS there, through ALL of that suffering and I wasn't aware until I did some reflecting years later (Yes, I know I'm dumb. It seems obvious now that it was GOD the WHOLE time.)

[maiverie]

HI CHỊ !!! 🥰🌼🤍

TYSM FOR BEING SO SUPPORTIVE & ENCOURAGING 😊🫶🫶

so after ur reply i've kinda taken some time to just... understand ur advice one by one... 🚣‍♀️🌊 (or like break them down into parts yk?) TRUST ME I DON'T MEAN THIS IN A BAD WAY‼️😭

YA SEE the thing here is that i didn't make it clear i was talking abt vietnamese literature !! MAYBE WE GOT LOST IN TRANSLATION~ 💔 ofc ik literature is literature (does this even make sense 🥲) but i think there're sum differences (may not be major but can still be a bit confusing (like the way it's taught depends on the country yk?)) so while breaking them down i translated them into vietnamese 😵‍💫 (dunno if it's even accurate 🤕) CUZ my english is like communication level so when it goes specifically into sth like a subject everything just goes 🌪️🌪️

NONETHELESS, ur advice is extremely helpful so TY !!!! 🩵 and NOOO u didn't misread my question bc i actually struggle with BOTH (nỗi đau của riêng em 🥲) so u were a lifesaver !!

random question but what's ur fave season? (mine is autumn 🍁 (kiểu thời tiết mùa thu không quá nóng hay quá lạnh á chị))

and did u see enha's recent photoshoot!??? 😻😽 (wá ư là đẹp)

CHEERING U ON ON UR CURRENT AND FUTURE PROJECTS 🩵🩵 chị cx nhớ giữ gìn sức khỏe nhaaaa

- em anon ☆

HI EMMM 😽

firstly i’m so sorry for the late reply and SECONDLY i realise i had once again misunderstood ur question 😭😭 GIRL I HAD NO IDEA u studied viet literature what the heck 😭😭 stawppp that’s seriously so so so cool but i’m so sorry for my useless ass advice wth 😭💔💔 ANYWAY no way icb i’ve been talking to u w my broken ass vietnamese when u literally study it BYEEEE 💀💀 ashjxdjs that’s so funny but omg are u living in vietnam or do u study it elsewhere?

it sucks because they always taught chinese and korean literature in my high school but never vietnamese 🙁 i wish i could have studied vietnamese formally SO i wish u all the best w ur studies,,, i hope they’re going well 😽😽🫶💖 IM SO SORRY AB MY IRRELEVANT ADVICE I can’t believe i just rambled on for no reason 😭😭

ALSO NOOO ur english is literally flawless I JUST HAVE A TENDENCY TO RAMBLE when i talk abt smth i get excited abt 😭

and hehe chị cũng nghĩ vậy !! ở úc mùa hè nóng thấy mồ 😭😭 but yk it’s too hard to get up in the morning when it’s winter 😭 ITS ACTUALLY WINTER RN HERE what’s autumn like where u live?? :o

ALSO enhas photoshoots r killing me it HURTS😭😭 they look tewwww good they rlly are THAT group 🤕 and akjdlsfkls cảm ơn nhiều nhé em 😽😽 pls take care of urself cutie 😽🫶

[iwaise]

happy birthday, my love!

It’s only a couple of days before your birthday but I’m already typing you a message because .. I want to 😒 BEBAJDHAJSHA tbh I have been thinking about what to do on your birthday since last month (last last month tbh). I’m listening to the playlist I gave to you on your birthday last year. Icb it’s been a year already since we met ??? And I didn’t expect that we’d ever talk again (I’m an asshole fr). I’m glad to be celebrating your birthday with you this year. I hope we get to celebrate lots and lots the following years. I don’t want to miss anything this time. God now I want to cry. I’m gonna take your birthday as an opportunity (again) to be nice to you ^^ you’re a year older but you’ll always be my baby. :p

Okay first, just a warning, this is going to be really long so .. I hope you’re ready for that. If you’re not then, you should be. 🙄

I have no idea how or where to start, tbh. Whenever I talk about you and what I feel, there’s just so much that I get so lost in it (in a good way). Loving you feels so warm. It’s so peaceful and comforting. I don’t know, I feel like it’s so rare to feel this way, and to have this sort of connection with someone. When we talked again in January, I wasn’t expecting for everything to come back. I mean, I did think about you a lot when we weren’t talking. My friends would always say that you have left such an impact despite knowing you for such a short time, and I noticed that even if I was away, I never stopped talking about you. You never left my mind. I thought then, we wouldn’t be in touch again, and I was scared too, I feel bad for being such a mess. When we talked again, the feelings I had crept in. I find myself loving you more and more everyday and the more I denied it, the more it just slapped me fr. I don’t regret loving you though. God, that was the easy part if I’m being honest. You’re not hard to love at all. I know sometimes you see yourself as someone who’s hard to have around, someone who’s a burden when they’re not okay but I never saw you that way. Whenever you tell me about how sad and hurt you are I just want to be beside you and have you around my arms. I sometimes wish I could carry everything to stop you from hurting so much. You have no idea how precious you are to me. You mean the world to me and I would never ever see you as someone difficult. I want to love you in a way that you don’t feel the need to hide when you’re not okay nor be someone else whom you think is more deserving of love. I love everything about you, and I always will.

You have given me all the reasons to be alive. Being loved by you is such a privilege and I would never in a million years take advantage of that. I want to keep that in me forever and treasure it for as long as I’m breathing. You make living and existing so beautiful. I know that sounds like bullshit but it’s true. We both know how shitty living and existing is, it’s fucking miserable. You though. Every day I wake up and I look for you. Every day I want to listen to you talk about your day, I don’t care if things repeat. God, I could listen to you talk all day. Hah I’m so gay .. oh no. I just. I love you so much and I’m so so grateful to be existing in the same shitty world with you. I’m so grateful for you. I’ll always be grateful for you and I wont let you worry about being unlovable. You will always be loved as long as I am alive. Happy birthday, Cristina. I wish to spend all of our birthdays together :p I love you.

[cantalooprat]

Grandmaster of Demonic Cultivation

What I Liked

actually good enemies to lovers even tho idt it was ever explicitly mentioned that it was enemies to lovers. but like. wangxian past dynamic of cocky hotheaded wwx n strict rule-adhering lwj n how they just...clash, bc wwx is naturally so boisterous and annoying and he just keeps bothering lwj, and how lwj was like nonsense but he??? does he like wwx???? and he just! gets so annoyed!! and when their ideologies stayed the same but their methodologies clashed and how lwj still wanted to save wwx but can't quite get it across. man, that part hurt.

ok but like im a huge sucker for the "even if the world is against you, i'll always be on your side" trope and the siege against wwx at nightless city w lwj defending him n attacking his own sect's ppl is like the epitome of that trope n im so in love oh my god. n then... how lwj recognized him as mxy n like. protected him from jc as if hes trying to make up for 13 yrs ago.

jin ling's uncle

jin ling lowkey reminds me of sun xiang n i love sun xiang

tangentially related: season 3 ending song "wuwang" is soo good, i love the lyrics, it's so tender and the imagery the lyrics paint is so beautiful and vivid

the plot is tied together so well! the cause and effect and the world wwx and lwj live in r so, so vividly described. like everything makes sense in the bigger picture, no one's fully right or wrong, everyone has reasons for behaving the way they do and they all receive the consequences, whether good or bad.

oh!! the xiao xingchen flashback!!! i think that was the first moment that rly sold me to mdzs. it was like watching a trainwreck and i mean it in the best way possible, the way one knows the ending is sad but that it's inevitable bc it's in the past, but even knowing that doesn't help the sadness.

What I Disliked

i want so badly an extra chapter dedicated to lwj. lxc mentioned how he wanted a flute with such a lost look on his face, branded himself with the same brand wwx got in the xuanwu cave incident n like. i want to read abt his emotional turmoil during that period of time. he's so emotionally repressed!! let me read more abt his feelings!!!!!

the way the story interweaved flashbacks n present events give me so much whiplash

more abt the donghua but the sheer injustice jiang cheng’s characterization faced at the end brings me so much rage

Notes

THE INCENSE BURNER TRILOGY LMAO that shit was Wild icb wwx used bichen as a dildo!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! i honestly dont know if its a pro or a con it was so wtf

ok i just imagine lwj eventually quietly moving on with life but like. he wont ever fall in love with anyone else. he will keep remembering wwx. n im so. idk. i just imagine stoic and icy lwj, keeping emperors smile in his room for wwx but wwx never returning. lwj and his song wangxian. lwj raising lsz as the last remnant of what wwx had dedicated himself to protect. im so. god. 

i literally went from "this wn is ok n i understand why its so popular" to "CRYING OVER WANGXIAN" (edit: now i am a jiang cheng stan)

i felt intense dugeuns rewatching the clip of wwx playing lwj's love song for him when he was subduing wn in the beginning he was walking backwards n then crashed into lwj n i was like,,, omg,,, lwj recognized him from the beginning bc of this,,,

i started mdzs expecting the emotional outcome of a regular danmei novel, and ended up a crying jiang cheng stan, and i think that says a lot abt mxtx as a writer

Quotes

He wasn't scared of falling. All these years, he'd fallen many times. But falling on the ground still hurt, after all. If someone was there to catch him, it'd be more than wonderful.

[cheekbites-moved]

HE WAS REAL ACTUAL OFFICIAL MERCH !?!? AND I DIDN’T EVEN KNOW ABT THIS ?!?!?!?!?!?!?!? IM LATE TO FINDING THIS OUT BY NEARLY A FUCKING DECADE????????????????? BITCH GIMME A TIME MACHINE RIGHT THE FUCK NOW WHAT THE WHOLE ENTIRE FUCK

[lunima]

SO I FINISHED DA:I AND TRESPASSER

[paintedsins]

Are we brothers? I would like that very much.

"they never speak of how the brother sits in waiting in the parable of the prodigal son. do you think he sat like jotham as he watched abimelech tear his family apart with his bare hands for a disillusioned dream, or do you think he would have walked into the massacre just to feel closer to his brother?” 

send a line from the terror !

[timextoxhajima]

Danaaaaa please can I have a (nsfw) scenario with Hyunjae where you're fwbs and one day an argument leads to some angsty sex and afterwards you walk it out and hes like "I'm in love with you." And you can decide to break my (well his technically) heart or not. Thank you ❤!

gif credits: @/hwqll

☾ title: like u

☾ member: tbz hyunjae (ah... the devil is back to haunt me)

☾ genre: fwb! hyunjae x fem! reader; uni! au [nsfw]

☾ warnings: the kind of smut that i write which isn’t all that explicit but- ; cursing

☾ wc: 2.3k

☾ a/n: yikes i was searching for gifs and found this one and said THIS IS THE ONE icb this was the first req i got and icb i’m writing it out HA also don’t blame me for breaking your heart at the end 

he’s watching you.

it’s blatantly obvious. the way he’s staring at you from across the room, despite there being other more important people in the dorm room. it’d be a lie if you said you weren’t watching him as much as he was watching you, and he hasn’t smiled once in the last 10 minutes. though the room was rowdy and filled with alcohol and yelling and this was nothing but a perfect habitat for him to destress, he couldn’t tear his attention off you.

of course, he was the one who had more at stake anyway. lines had to be drawn in this toxicity of a relationship you had with hyunjae - popular, smart, kind, but also entrapped in the realms of what people took him for. 

maybe it was your fault, for being the one to introduce him to your alcoholic friends who gave no second thought to coating the room with the scent of strawberry after giving a puff to their electronic cigarettes. 

it was only a matter of time before he got close to them, and yours to his, and now you’re stuck in a room where people were yelling dares at each other, like every other lame friend group.

you knew the day was coming. the day where someone asks either of you if you were dating, so when the question is carelessly flung across the room at him, his eyes immediately dart away from yours and at the source of the query. 

“dating? her?” the signature kind smile decors his face like christmas lights. “nah. i have better things to do than mix around with people like her.”

“oooooh,” the room lowly groans, some of them turning to you with wide eyes. but you can’t care less, no. sure, the ache is familiar in your chest because you know he probably treats you like a sex doll and a therapist in one, but lines have been drawn. he’s not allowed to be possessive. he’s not allowed to get mad when someone lays a hand on you. he’s not allowed to get hurt by you. 

and these same rules apply to you.

“so... you wouldn’t mind if i did this, right?” with some valour, eric wraps an arm around your waist, pulling you closer to him and pressing his lips onto the curve of your ear. 

the room erupts into loud cat calls and hooting, and through your half-shut, smiling eyes, you can see a strange frustration befall hyunjae’s face. 

“if you’re not dating her, then maybe i’d like her to myself,” eric smirks, finger travelling to your chin and turning your face to his. 

but the mood of the room shatters in a split second when hyunjae abruptly stands, the chair he was sitting on being pushed back with a loud drag when he bolts to his feet.

“i’d like a word with y/n.”

“whoa, hey!” eric throws his hands up in confusion as hyunjae stomps across the space and grabs your wrist. “you just said you’re not dating her!”

he doesn’t give you an opportunity to respond as he literally yanks you to your feet, dragging you out of the room and shutting eric’s door behind him.

“what the hell do you think you’re doing?” 

“i could ask you the same thing,” he growls, refusing to look back at you as he pulls you along the corridor and nearly punches the lift button. 

“what do you mean ‘ask me the same thing’?!” trying to writhe your wrist out of his grip proves fruitless when all you feel is the eventual pinch that sinks into your skin. “lee hyunjae!”

the lift arrives, metallic doors reflecting your struggle ding open and he drags you in without responding. 

“jesus!” you snap, finally yanking your wrist out his grip when he gets the door closed and the lift heading for the floor where his room is. “what’s wrong with you? we had a deal.”

through the reflection in the door, he’s staring at you. not uttering a single word, not moving a muscle - just watching you.

“you’ve lost your fucking mind,” a chuckle loaded with disbelief rolls off your tongue. “all that studying and keeping up this façade of yours has finally snapped you into two.”

the lift slows to a stop, and the doors ding open once more just as he reaches behind to grab your hand. again, your speed is no match for his, and even if you were, he’d probably just pick you up and throw you over his shoulder.

“y’know, maybe this stress from whatever that’s happening in your life? maybe me being your therapist isn’t gonna fucking cut it.”

hyunjae pushes his door open and slaps on the light switch.

“i can’t fucking believe i’m-”

slamming the door behind you, he pushes you against it, and you hear your own head thud against the wood. hyunjae leans forward, arms outstretched with his palms flat against the surface. his nose is inches from yours as he breathes down your philtrum, eyes glomming over yours; looking down at you.

“go on. manhandle me. that’s what you’ve been doing anyway, right?” you look up at him, chest rising harshly with every breath. “whenever you’re fucking stressed... you call me, then you. fuck. all. your. stress. into. me.”

and between every word, you jab his chest with your finger.

his teeth grind against each other when he clenches his jaw. you can see the muscle in the back of his jaw and his temples tighten. 

“are you done?” he asks, voice low and rumbling in the back of his throat. 

“and what if i’m not?” raising a brow, you finally shove him back by his shoulders. “are you gonna start crying and then maybe you’ll go find a-”

he gathers your wrists and pins them above your head, back against the door. your back is perfectly lined with the length of the door, head tilting to the side to avoid his tantrum.

“you really have a fucking-”

then the pressure between your thighs halt the words on the tip of your tongue when he pushes his leg between them. 

“i ‘have a fucking’ what?” 

sucking in a deep breath, you close your fists with his grip around them tightening. “i said... you have a fucking probl-”

and to your dismay, a groan, low in the back of your throat, escapes in place of a word.

“go on,” he whispers into your ears, his breath now landing on your neck instead and sending chills down your spine. “say it.”

yet he takes the skin on your neck between his lips and teeth, the warmth of his tongue swiping across your sweet spot. shutting your eyes, you wince in partial pleasure and misery combined, feeling your gut start to crumble from within as he continues to work on you with his thigh.

the sudden suction on your neck tears you away from your growing need down south, emptying your lungs with a sharp gasp. 

hyunjae pulls away, eyeing the mark he’s left on your neck, probably bright and in the worst place to have it. in your peripheral vision, now blurred and corrupted from the ecstacy that he’s providing you below, the smirk on his face has now replaced his frustration.

“cat got your tongue?” he brushes his bottom lip against your upper. 

so close, yet so far. 

foolishly hopeful and in a bid to reach his lips, you tilt your chin forward - only to have him tilt his head back and chuckle under his breath. shame rushes through you like a tidal wave as you lean back again, halfway down the route of resignation.

“ask.”

his free hand finds your cheek, running his index finger along your cheekbone and down your jaw. dragging his finger down your neck, he fiddles with the rim of your shirt where your chest disappears under the cotton. 

tugging it downwards, he attaches his lips to the space right below your collar bone, igniting another careless mewl from you as you cringe in shameful bliss.

he pulls away, letting the elasticity of your shirt bounce back to hide the mark. he finds the rim of your jeans and digs his hand under the material, riling up your shirt and sliding his palm under. 

“you had alot to say just now, why don’t you finish what you wanted to?”

groping your chest, the warmth of his palm seeps through the cotton of your bra.

with a strained voice you, you manage a “fuck off.”

“oh?” 

then he removes his palm and pulls you off the door. wrapping his arm around your waist, he finally shoves his lips between yours, teeth knocking when he misaligns them. 

but inevitably, you melt into the kiss, your arms attempting to create some distance between your writhing bodies and yet your mouth has already parted to let his tongue fight with yours. 

pushing you back on your feet, he drops you into his bed and rests your back against the wall it’s pushed against. he climbs on top of you, lifting your thighs to his hips and pressing his weight into your crotch.

“fuck, hyunjae-”

without a response, he dips his nose into your neck again, fingers fiddling with the hem of your shirt. slowly riling it up, your stomach is exposed to the cool air and he breaks the kiss to remove it. hastily pulling off his own shirt, your arms find his face as he re-attaches his lips to yours, his palms pressing into the mattress by your hips. 

a soft tear is heard when he almost violently tries to pull the rim of your jeans over the curve of your pelvis, and he stands away from you to pull off the denim. now at a loss with the space he’s created, you lean forward and crawl to your knees on his bed, watching him untie the knot of his joggers and pull it off his hips. 

he lowers his head, tilting your chin up with his fingers and captures your lips once more, pushing you back against the wall with your legs apart. he doesn’t care to go down on you, no, because he knows all the right spots on your body and by now, you were already a whining mess beneath him. pride lost and thoughts gone. 

his weight shifts about between your legs, and then without breaking the sloppy kiss, he drags you off the wall and lies you down into his pillow. 

his lack of patience pushes the base of your underwear to the side, and without warning, he plunges into you.

“i didn’t do much and you’re this wet,” he groans into your ear, chuckling softly. 

your palms find his arms to grip as he picks up his pace, hands pushing away the cloth that’s covering your humility on your chest. he takes the tip into his mouth, grazing his teeth over the sensitivity.

bolts of pleasure erupt all through your body, your nails digging into his arms and your thighs tight around his hips. his thrusts become rapid and aggressive, and his pants have evolved into a mixture of moans and growls when he pulls away to gawk at the sight under him.

pulling your legs off his hips, he repositions them to have your calves over his shoulders instead. the angle shifts, and now the new depth of him inside you forces tight mewls out your throat.

curses slip right by your bliss, and his breathing starts to grow unstable with yours. when his thumb presses into your core, the build-up begins.

his palms find your waist and locks your body still to the mattress, continuing his incessant thrusting with his hips rolling against yours. 

the immense pleasure pushes you over the edge with his last harsh thrusts, and he lowers his face to yours to drink all your messy, animalistic groans. shortly after, he pulls out, releasing on your stomach as he pants, chest rising with his thighs shaking beneath him.

“fuck.”

gulping to calm your breathing, you lower your legs and look down at the mess on your stomach. 

“that was not supposed to happen.”

he presses his palms into his eyes, fingers awkwardly curled away from his face. “no, it wasn’t.”

sighing, he takes a few moments to get off the bed and pulls a clean towel from his drawers, cleaning his remnants off your skin. 

he squats to pick your clothes up, handing them to you before he hops into the attached bathroom himself and turning on the tap, letting the water run over his head and down the length of his body.

holding your clothes to your chest, you stand and announce at him, “you didn’t close the door.”

“i know,” he shuts his eyes. the water flows off his nose and chin. 

the absence of your pride forces you to put your shirt back on, your core already feeling the soreness when you readjust your underwear.

you’ve got one leg into your jeans when he calls your name, halting you in the process. “i’m sorry you think i treat you like a sex doll and a therapist.”

you provide him a wry laugh through your nose, resuming the other leg into your pants. “isn’t that what i am anyway?”

silence. water continues to run.

“no.”

your fingers somehow slow down as they fix the zipper and button. the water stops. 

“because i’m in love with you.”

looking back over your shoulder, you see him standing with a towel wrapped around his hips. his hair is still dripping and the water droplets on his shoulders roll off with every miniscule shift he makes.

“that’s my problem.”

[smxtncity]

have u heard about the jisung situation? nct jisung not stray kids jisung btw 😭😭

i have....and when i watched the video as well it was just...i had to double take to see what happened.

people shouldn't be hating him for it, educating him is also something which us as fans shouldn't be doing, he should be doing that himself....and also icb the editors and whoever was involved in the making of the video actually let that publish all over the internet like that knowing how sensitive comments like that are.

comments like those maybe treated as "alright." in sk but they aren't alright anywhere. No one has the right to comment on someone's, skin, race, weight or any physical appearance whatsoever.

Something which cannot be immediately changed should never be a thing which should be brought up and spoken about like this, made mockery out of

As a POC and as a South Asian i felt very bad when i saw that but at the same time, it's just that a lot of people in asia still believe it's okay to comment on stuff like skin and weight.

I'm a plus size person and honestly the kind of behaviour people around me have regarding those issues hurt alot.

This wasn't the first time Jisung has let out something about Hyuck's appearance. If I'm not wrong he mentions his weight a little too many times for anyone's liking and that's just not healthy, no matter how close they are, this isn't something which should be brushed off. He doesn't deserve death threats and hate regarding this, but needs some genuined education upon these matters.

Even though I'm a "Fair" person on the Indian scale of "Fairness." I'm genuinely hurt that someone would say something like that.

What's annoying is the fact that the editors decided it was okay for it to remain in the video. Even though it's a four word question it was very bad and I hope he educates himself upon these matters.

[avaasilva]

exactly! and don't get me started of the MESS of a season they gave us because 1. i literally have no energy left. 2. v's death would have hit different if they knew that the formula of separating e and v was geting old and boring. and starting the season with them working, or doing who-knows-what together like it was better (maybe a fight in between idc). and that the plot should've revolved around the MAINS. it was so simple. i feel soooo bad for jodie and sandra, again. they care so much for their characters yet a new writer comes and ruins everything. and thinks shes doing something odd and innovative by introducing new characters that nobody. gives. a. f*ck.

it's the way they killed her. for nothing. if they had been together for a little while, had their moment of peace and decided to get rid of the 12 knowing they could die but doing it together anyway? it was the point of the show. in life and death, they were together, linked together. fate. scorpion and the frog? no. cupid and psyche? no. romeo and juliet? no. they made all these references for nothing. this season makes NO sense whatsoever. i really thought it would somewhat pay off but no. waste of time and waste of talent. making this a carolyn season with a carolyn centric episode for a spin off nobody gives a shit about when we know NOTHING about eve, please. icb we felt relieved when they said laura neal was the headwriter, that we felt some false sense of trust when the writers room couldn't shut up about how "gay" they were. it hurts even more.