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#'you wouldn't tell a story with them because you have me' or 'you wouldn't tell a story with cruella when you have maleficent around'
salemlunaa · 3 days
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"OH WELL, IM NOT GONNA BE HERE FOR LONG, IM GONNA SHIFT ANYWAY" girl...
let's break down why this mindset, although very common, isn't super healthy...
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I saw a post earlier where op talks about how they are un phased about all the bad things happening to them because they "won't be here for much longer”, which is so real and it honestly made me laugh so hard but, i must admit, this way of thinking can also have an unhealthy side.
I, personally, have also been victim to this mindset, and honestly i can tell you nothing good comes from thinking like this. You experience something bad, hurtful, embarrassing, slightly traumatic (which, bear in mind, you wouldn't have experienced if you hadn't procrastinated and tapped in to the void) and you tell yourself "it's okay, i'm not here for long anyway", you abandon responsibilities (that, again, wouldn't be your responsibility if you would ve stayed disciplined and tapped in) and you tell yourself "it's fine, i'm gonna shift anyway" "i'm probably gonna get into the void tonight so it doesn't matter"
NO NO and NO
of course it's good to have the mindset of knowing, knowing that it's your last day here and knowing that the void is the only outcome for you, because that type of thinking is what allows you to shift consciousness and tap in to the void, but a lot of you say that shit without even properly applying your knowledge, a lot of you are gonna remain sounding like broken records, repeating this shit for years, i swear it will be 2028 and yall will still be saying "it's okay i won't be here for long", "im gonna shift anyway"
don't wait for shit to hit the fan for you to get serious about your desires, don't wait for your circumstances to get horrible for you to finally fix up and actually do something. If you really knew you were a god, you wouldn't be here reading this, you would be as pretty as you wanna be, and as rich and happy as you wanna be enjoying your dream life. Don't fall into a comfortable routine with your current reality, (which is really just your old story) because it's not worth it. I even see you guys making and scripting for a "better current reality" (another excuse to remain comfortable with procrastination), when you could have your DREAM life, you guys get swept up in your old story, just because it can be "alright" sometimes. And then when something bad happens, you repeat the same phrase "oh well, i'm gonna shift anyway", and then when things go back to being "alright", you get comfortable again, further procrastinating, when you could have ANYTHING. Who cares about your "alright", "mediocre" reality when you could have the best and more!!
like girl, don't stay comfortable until you're forced to get uncomfortable with a negative change in circumstances. You should be determined to shift consciousness ALL THE TIME, not just when things get tough or responsibilities pile up. Because again, if you had that consistent mindset you wouldn't be here.
get uncomfortable with what you have to achieve what you want, so that all you want becomes all you have
GET UNCOMFORTABLE NOW SO YOU CAN LIVE COMFORTABLY FOR ETERNITY, DONT WAIT FOR SHIT TO HIT THE FAN ᥫ᭡💋
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muzaktomyears · 2 days
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Two of Us play notes/thoughts/Easter eggs I noticed
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they played solo Beatles tracks as waiting music before the play began so I sat there listening to ‘Monkberry Moon Delight’ with a theatreful of people which was great 
before Paul turns up John is baking(/burning) bread
John is wearing underwear under his dressing gown which obvs had to be but also my suspension of disbelief was CHALLENGED
when Paul rings up to be let in John does a little rhyme to make him prove he is who he says he is. this is not the exact wording but it went something like: "Five little boys in Hamburg did play/All through the night and all through the day/Ingrid the stripper would do anything/But who got the clap? Was it sexy Stu Sutcliffe - or the lead singer in Wings?" and then Paul has to admit it was him who got the clap
when Paul takes his shoes off he also takes his socks off - idk if this is an intentional barefoot Paul thing but it is hilarious later when they're fighting and Paul is about to leave and angrily putting his socks back on
John and Paul have Get Back era hair/beards, which is weird - presumably because they assume people going to see this will also have seen Get Back but might not know their 1976 looks as well?? idk
some of the dialogue and references have been made a bit more British - the skit they do at the piano is now set in a British greasy spoon instead (still with the American accents)
instead of fighting "like the Hatfields and McCoys" they're now fighting like "the Montagues and the Capulets" (👀)
'Sh-Boom' is played on the record player while they smoke weed (Paul uses the album cover to roll the joint)
George and Ringo both get more of a mention! Paul says that George is happy now (John replies that he's not happy, he's reincarnated). John tells Paul a story Ringo told him about going on a bus in NYC and being recognised.
"I'm the best fuck you ever had" is said by John during the fight (Paul replies "If that's your way of saying you were the real brains behind the Beatles-" etc. etc.)
"You should have married me when you had the chance" is said by John during the Yoko/losing my friend bit
"It's only me" as John's way to get Paul not to leave after the fight
when John goes out to get disguises for them Paul sits at the piano and starts playing some notes he finds there (he'd asked about them earlier and John had said they're nothing). we get a few notes of 'Now and Then' before John returns (ghjshgkhgkdshgksd who did this I HATE YOU)
the appearance of the I Love Paul badge!! John wears it on his disguise jacket and Paul asks what it says. John tells him and then Paul replies "Lucky Paul".......
they never go outside in this version - John says he'll go but then thinks better of it. this means that John comes across as even more locked away than he does in the film.
the police bit is sort of done when Paul puts on a leather hat from the disguises and pretends to be a policeman come to question John, who John then talks back at. he also yells out of the window at some police below at one point.
Paul realises they're never actually going to Luigi's, so John lays the table for him as if they're at a restaurant together (including calling him "Lady McCartney" and "my love")
the bit with the fan is sort of recreated but instead it's John asking Paul whether he truly thinks Wings at the Speed of Sound is the number 1 record in America (which obvs changes it quite a lot)
Julian is brought up - they're toasting to various people/things (ending with "Dr. Winston O'Boogie and Paul Ramon") and Paul says "to Julian" and sort of confronts John about him and how he treated him
during the toasting Paul also mentions "putting hair on a seagull's chest" which John questions and then Paul says it's something his dad used to say
I thought the lift scene/roof scene wouldn't be happening... BUT THEN a lift descended from the ceiling ❤️ the magic of theatre
the kiss still happens and idk but I thought the vibe was a bit different from the film version - less jokey (and no lines after about brushing his teeth/is my name Brian)
Paul: I bought into it that you and me didn't get along well (paraphrasing the Stephen Colbert interview)
they hug at the end of the roof conversation (I was sat very close to this since the actors come in front of the stage to do it and they were both crying and it WAS ALL TOO MUCH 😭😭)
John gets them two guitars to practice with before they go out and they sit opposite each other in chairs and Paul says “I know which one to begin with” and John says “What?” and they lean forward and then the phone rings
when Paul leaves John he’s crying and it’s like okay rip out my heart I guess
the play ends with Paul on the phone to Linda and John on the phone to Yoko, at opposite sides of the stage, and they say “I love you” to their wives but also to each other and it’s ridiculous????
yeah then ‘Give Peace a Chance’ plays which is such a bizarre choice idek
anyway who knows if it's a good play or what the actual people there thought about it because obvs I can have no rational reaction to it but I'm so glad I went to see it because someone on the writing team is one of us I SEE YOU
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possiblyreallyme · 22 hours
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Ace's little girlfriend
warning: dirty words, getting caught (sort of?), ace can't be subtle for the life of him.
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The young second division commander was a fun time on the ship, from his stupid pranks to his kitchen raids. He was like the little brother of the crew, despite going on and on about his own younger brother all the time, bragging or just straight up annoying the men with stories.
And he was a flirt, much to the teasing of everyone else. He'd playfully flex his muscles when girls saw them working on the deck, wink across bars when the crew was in a tavern or even scoot just a little closer to the fancy pirate ladies they sometimes met.
It was funny— Of course Marco would have to tease him, of course Thatch would impersonate him at dinner, of course Izo would bat his lashes and "faint" as if Ace was some sort of hunk. And what made it funnier, was that they all knew what he really was.
Poor boy liked to pretend to be some bigshot, but they knew he was nothing more than a nervous virgin, too shy to even hold a girl's hand. It was cute when they asked about all the chicks he'd banged and watch him go bright red, flames licking at his freckled shoulders while he stutters and fumbles over his words.
One time, back on a summer island when Ace was still relatively new, Thatch thought it'd be funny to buy a red thong and place it in Ace's laundry basket to stir up his nerves. And boy, was it the talk of all of Whitebeard's fleets for months.
"Ummm..." If only this situation was as lighthearted as that time.
Ace had the eyes of every man on the ship burning holes into his skin, and he had never wished he wore a shirt more because suddenly the mostly-faded scratches down his back and shoulders felt bright red and exposed.
Marco was stunned into silence, seeing how Ace clutched the small white piece of fabric with a death grip, looking ready to burn it while he kept it in his clenched fist. He had never seen Ace grab something from someone so fast— not even when Luffy's bounty went up and Vista held the wanted poster over his head.
"Son," Whitebeard started slowly, raising an eyebrow from where he sat at his chair, keeping his voice low and suspicious. "Could you tell me why Marco found that up in the crow's nest this morning?"
Mortified, Ace turned a brighter red than the beads of his necklace, stammering over some lame excuse about how it wasn't his! He had just grabbed it out of Marco's hand because, um, it was disrespectful to stare at a lady's undergarments!
Thatch practically snorted; eyes glued to Ace's fist with a playful grin. The situation might have been odd and slightly serious, but it was entertaining nonetheless.
Marco, however, was much more smug than Ace was comfortable with, crossing his arms with a mean curl of his lips as he strode forward.
"Well, it seems our Fire-Fist here does know how to get some pussy." He didn't care how embarrassed it made the young division commander to hear him use such dirty words, especially when Ace himself was known far and wide for his colorful vocabulary.
"I-It's not like that!" Ace all but screamed, voice a little too high-pitched and whiney to convince any of them. He knew damn well it was like that, and it almost made him feel bad to deny that you two had such an amazing night a few hours before.
He wished he had the brains to think of a way out of the situation, blame it on someone that they wouldn't be surprised snuck a girl onto the ship. Part of him wished he could boast, too. Because fuck, last night was something he wouldn't be able to get out of his newly-fucked head.
The fabric was so small, especially in Ace's large hands. Much too dainty and breakable and feminine to belong to anyone on the crew. Even the nurses wouldn't wear something like this, a cute, cotton lace with frilly white edges and a flowery design.
"Ha!!" Thatch couldn't hold it back anymore, encouraging the crew to break out into fits of laughter and snickers and almost childish giggles, which only further Ace's wish to bury himself in a hole and die.
Oh god, he was such an idiot. He should have remembered to pick up your panties before someone saw them, and now he would pay the price.
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kyri45 · 21 hours
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This may be an unpopular take lol but it just kinda crossed my mind. I don’t know but I kinda feel like MK doesn’t really have the right to know or ask about that kind of baggage from his bio parents? Like it has to be up to Wukong and Macaque to tell him. (Low key these three if you actually think about it have NOT known each other enough for that kind of baggage to surface up like this)
Like there are stuff about some family members of mine I did not even realize were terrible people until waaaaaaay later into adulthood, after being raised by my parents for a long time. And the only reason I was told about a lot of this is because my mom was stressed the hell out in the moment and blabbed it to me. To this day I am pretty sure she deep down did not want me to know.
I dunno maybe I am way off base here and it’s more a difference in cultures and family dynamics (ie from an Asian household weeeeeee) but the story having to bend over backwards to get to a point where MK is probs about to yell at the two of them just feels… eh to me. Like I said tho, unpopular take lol so I get if peeps will disagree haha
Oh yeah I agree on the fact that he also shouldn't have poked too much durong the series about what happened between them. The thing here is mostly- like the fight and everything is somethimg that is literally in JTTW, and since the book is canon it means that almost everyone who had at least read the book is aware of what happened between them. MK is known for only have read very few parts of the book so. In some way, he would have found out. And if the little guy got to experienced it 4k I guess he kind of neccessitated some extra explaination (even though I'll admit, he could have just read the book more and he wouldn't have such a high view of Wukong without having to go thtough extra trauma but i guess chat likes the angst
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onlyhyunjin · 14 hours
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𝐇𝐄𝐄𝐒𝐄𝐔𝐍𝐆 𝐅𝐈𝐂 𝐑𝐄𝐂𝐎𝐌𝐌𝐄𝐍𝐃𝐀𝐓𝐈𝐎𝐍𝐒!
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(♡) - my personal favorites (🔞) - CONTAINS NSFW CONTENT
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NEW BEGINNINGS - @ikeuverse (flirting with your brother's brother-in-law wasn't in your plans after returning from studying abroad. it wasn't something you were going to stop either since heeseung was the epitome of beauty. but when there's another woman's name in the story. what happens? you don't want to be caught between a betrayal… or so you thought.) (♡)
MARRY ME - @ikeuverse (ever since you met lee heeseung, he told you that the two of you were going to get married. all the time, at every opportunity, he reinforced it until one day, drunk, you accepted. was he dreaming or did it really happen? it wouldn't be so bad to fall for his jokes for once.)
TIDES OF REGRET - @pprodsuga (in the year since heeseung first rejected your love confession, you've tried everything to get over him. a trip to europe makes you realize you miss your former best friend more than anything, and it makes heeseung realize he's got it all wrong.) (♡)(🔞)
HOW I MET YOUR MOTHER - @i2sunric (your daughter asks heeseung to tell the greatest love story of all and he takes the chance to narrate how he met you, the love of his life.) (♡)
JUNE BLOSSOMS - @soobnny (synopsis. as the month of may ends, you wonder what june holds for you and heeseung (especially with no more need to fake date.)
LATE SUMMER LOVIN' - @4am-enha (you desperately want to spend your last summer here in town with your friends, only to find out almost all of them are away on vacation. that is, all of them but heeseung. the one friend you’d never really been that close with.)
BITE ME - @drunkhazed (“I’m kind of confused still.” You admit, anxiously shuffling to sit without making eye-contact. Heeseung chuckles plopping down by your side, arm slinging back over your shoulder to keep you pressed against him.)(🔞)
COFFEE & CREAM - @ham-st4r (one chilly night after a long work shift, you’re unfortunately forced to walk home. Cause you left your bag at work, half way through your journey you stumble across a homeless man who you naturally offer money to, and he though he refuses. You give it to him anyway, and down the road, you’ll find that those two dollars changed not only his life but yours as well.) (🔞)
IT'S CUPID, STUPID - @mygnolia (To hell with Lee Heeseung, you couldn't find someone you hated more than the boy who's by your side no matter what. You figured that maybe the summer before university would be the best way to finally let go of him, and to leave the hate you have in your childhood- but no. What do you mean you have to spend ALL summer with him?)
FUCK BUDDIES - @hajunzi (y/n and heeseung and fwb after heeseung win in his football match y/n gives him the best reward)
TEETH - @gyuuberryy (you were not thrilled about the move in of your new neighbour. mostly because he was so strange and seemed to be hiding something dark. and partly because you couldn’t stop yourself from getting closer to him because of your unwanted attraction. you were determined to expose his dark secret and get rid of him once and for all. but, it was proving to be a difficult task because he was just so irresistible..and needy.)
PLAYER RANK: PLATINUM - @simpjaes (You’re not sure what’s worse, your sister’s boyfriend or your sister’s boyfriend’s friends. What you thought would be a great deal in living with her throughout college turns into a major game of cat and mouse, where you’re unsure if your moral compass is pointing in the right direction solely because you suspect someone is wearing a giant sex magnet to throw it off.) (🔞)
RUDE - @4wkjun (heeseung has never loved anyone as much as he loves y/n. y/n’s father has never hated someone as much as he hates heeseung. but it doesn’t matter, heeseung’s gonna marry y/n anyway.)
I OFFER YOU MY EVERYTHING - @heegyukeluv (You never cared about sex, until you did. You grew too afraid of it, scared of disappointing the other person or showing your inexperience. But then you met Heeseung, the hot basketball captain that stole your heart and became your biggest fantasy. ) (🔞)
VERBOTEN - @heesbaby (a bad stroke of luck saw lee heeseung, your dads coworker, moving into your small apartment until he found his feet again. emotionally unavailable and a workaholic, you were going to try your absolute hardest to make him loosen up. even if it meant breaking a few of the house rules he'd set out.) (🔞) (♡)
10 DAYS TO FALL IN LOVE - @luvyeni (you and heeseung used to be bestfriends as children — he even told you he'd marry you one day. but then you went to highschool and things changed , he dyed his hair and started hanging out with a new group group of friends. through all that his love never changed for you — has yours changed for him?)
RENT A BOYFRIEND - @jayujus (in which jeon y/n is desperate to find a boyfriend ASAP because she needs a date for her family's mixer. her best friend, ningning, introduces her to a website perfect for this situation!)
CHERRY CHAPSTICK - @angelwonie (ever since you met lee heeseung, he told you that the two of you were going to get married. all the time, at every opportunity, he reinforced it until one day, drunk, you accepted. was he dreaming or did it really happen? it wouldn't be so bad to fall for his jokes for once.)
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thisgirlnamedblusy · 3 days
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Can you write about a reader who is the most beautiful girl in the village? Donna literally worships her, she has many pictures of her in her house,she is overprotective, literally treats her like a goddess. Every time Donna sees reader she loves to touch her, tell her how much she loves her and how beautiful she is.Reader is also very shy and doesn't talk much, even more than Donna. Can it be smut G!P Donna with reader being super shy and embarrassed? Reader needs aftercare soo much :))
Yesss!!!! Thank you for your request!!!! I hope you like it and sorry about the language mistakes!!!!! :)))))
Your cursed beauty
Pairing: Donna Beneviento x Fem! Reader
Warnings: G!P Donna, smut, Minors DNI, fluff,
Word count: 7,672
Summary: She's the only one who really loves you...
N/A: Sorry about the language mistakes!!! Requests are open!!! I'm waiting yours!!!I love you all!!!
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“So, with the rune in his hand, he made an effort not to use that power again, because the fate of the region was much more important than his selfish desires...” you read out loud as you wrote.
The always reassuring silence of the mansion, the subtle lighting of the place, that peace, that tranquility were your best companions when it came to writing one of your stories. It was a shame that someone had other plans for you.
“Hey! Silly, silly!” a shrill voice pulled you out of the sheet of paper, blurring the image of your characters in your mind. At least you were used to it. “Hey, do you hear me? Hello? Silly?”
“Angie...” you sighed in a low voice, shaking your head as the puppet climbed onto the old desk, taking a not-so-subtle look at the already written sheets. “W-Wait…”
Your whispers weren't going to stop the doll's curious eagerness.
“Keep reading, keep reading, keep reading,” the puppet insisted, pointing at the paper.
“I can't read what isn't written,” you murmured, taking that new page out of the machine, pretending that this intrusion hadn't made you nervous.
“Well, write then,” Angie said, with her hands on her hips.
“I can't if you're here,” you said with a shy tone, afraid that one of your words would offend the doll. It wouldn't be the first time. “Besides, I'm done for today.”
Sometimes you thought Angie only did those things to make you nervous. What nonsense, of course she did it to make you nervous.
“I hope you've accepted my suggestions,” she said in a petulant voice.
You looked at her briefly, shaking your head. Despite your shyness, despite the comfort you felt in not having to speak, you knew it was impossible.
“I can’t put spaceships in it, it’s a fantasy novel,” you said in a soft voice, not looking at the puppet as you did so, an old trick to lose the fear of communicating.
“Bullshit,” Angie protested, in a brusque tone, one that even startled you. “Spaceships are cool.”
“Angie, lasciala stare,” a tender voice appeared to protect you.
Your lips broke into a smile, your cheeks flushed at those melodic words. The sound of the heels matched the beat of your heart and your eyes moved from the desk to contemplate her approaching figure.
Since you were very young, you were blessed with the gift of beauty.
Being beautiful was the dream of many girls, they strived to achieve it. They prayed to achieve it.
You never had to do it, you were born beautiful, according to too many people, you were the most beautiful girl in the village.
It was a proud title, in which you yourself didn’t believe. You never cared. You never looked at yourself the mirror and smiled. You never contemplated that beauty everyone said you had.
The only thing you were proud of was your gift for writing.
Creating a world, characters, play with them, make them live a thousand adventures was truly your passion. Since you were 10 years old you had started with short stories, with tales that you read to your parents. That was a gift for you, not looking in the mirror and knowing that you were beautiful.
Unfortunately, those kinds of talents were not noticed in that village. The Black Gods, Mother Miranda, the Lords... They transformed that place into a gray pit of bitterness, of conformism.
Like those knights in the books, with small brains and big lances, the villagers didn’t see in you an artist, not even a friend, all they could see was your face, your beauty.
A beauty desired by others, an extraordinary gift that was a blessing for those silly girls who dreamed of their prince charming. For you it was not like that, for you that beauty was a curse, an unjust sentence.
You felt the eyes, the glances on you, you heard whispers. You lived with uncomfortable smiles.
Far from considering you a strange girl, your friends seemed to be interested in your talent. That was a good thing, or so you thought. Every day you had several people willing to listen to your stories, to hear a voice that wasn’t yet afraid to come out of your lips.
In your ignorance you believed that those invitations were simply a desire to hear your stories, since it was the favorite excuse of those boys and girls.
You soon discovered you were wrong. You only had to ask, ask what part they liked the most, what they thought of the fate of a character, to realize that they never listened to you, that your stories didn't matter to them.
Nobody cared about your writing, nobody cared about your stories. They only wanted to be close to you to try to make that fairy tale princess fall in love with a brainless knight.
That same attitude, the repetition of that behavior over and over again led you little by little to despair, to not feeling comfortable talking, relating to people.
One day you were beautiful and outgoing, the next one you were beautiful, yes, but shy and lacking in words.
Shyness arrived over time, as a side effect of that curse your beauty was.
“Oh, come on, don't be like that, let me invite you to dinner at least,” he protested, while you walked away, telling yourself that it was over, that no one who didn't want to listen to you would deserve to hear your voice.
“I really want to know the end,” a hoarse voice startled you, getting in your way.
It wasn't a dream, nor a nightmare. One of the village Lords, the youngest, the strangest, Donna Beneviento, appeared in front of you, with her hands in an elegant pose.
It seemed unlikely, even impossible.
But your duty was to obey those authorities, and so you did. The lady in black and you sat on a bench. Silence accompanied the mystery hidden by that black veil. There were no words, only gestures that encouraged you to continue that story.
You would never have imagined that she, that sick, disturbed woman, that doll maker would listen to you. She didn't interrupt. She didn't seem to devour you with her gaze. She just wanted to listen to you.
No one, not even your best friends, had made the slightest effort to let you share your talent with them.
Donna Beneviento did, she listened to you again and again, she asked you questions, she seemed curious about your talent, enthralled by your stories, and not by your beauty.
Well, that would be trivializing it a bit, of course she thought you were beautiful, the most beautiful girl in the village, but that was a very secondary detail.
She was the first, the only one who dared to meet you, who seduced you not only by what you were on the outside, but also by what you were on the inside. The dates on that remote bench were frequent. They were dates that weren’t scheduled; they simply existed, always in the same place, always at the same time.
You found refuge in her presence. Attentive, kind, shy like you... That was the youngest of the Lords.
That was the first time, the first time that a compliment, a flattery, was accompanied by praise for your talent.
Her deformed face forced her to isolate herself from the world. Her different body embarrassed her, almost as much as your beauty did to you. You tow ere so different and so alike…
You had no doubt, you loved her, and she loved you.
Without thinking, you threw yourself into that romance, into her lips, into her kisses, into her hugs. Donna was the only one who treated you the way you deserved, the only one who won your heart.
Living in the old mansion was your next step. You couldn't walk without feeling her lips, her caresses, her words of love. Yes, she was also dazzled by your beauty, she adored you as if you were some kind of Goddess, but you knew she was the only woman you allowed to do it.
Your shy attitude was curious to her. Your talent was fascinating to her. But, Donna... She was much more than that to you, Donna was everything to you.
You could no longer live without her kisses, without her voice, without her caresses... Anything that meant not having her by your side was like a hell for you.
“Hi, tesoro...” the lady sighed, bending down to steal a kiss from you, to cheer your spirit with a tender smile.
You smiled again, embarrassed by the softness of her lips, her words. Your cheeks had become accustomed to blushing in her presence, and your body trembled accepting her caresses.
“Donna,” you said with a soft voice, broken by the shame your body felt when hers surrounded it.
“Are you done for today?” she asked softly, looking at the pile of papers on the desk.
You nodded slowly, lowering your gaze as she looked at you again with that smile, one that didn't seem to want to fade from her face.
“I've finished two chapters,” you said in a whispery voice, trying to make the heat in your cheeks dissipate, something complicated due to her constant caresses.
“Mm, you were inspired,” Donna said, amused, putting her hand on your shoulder and sitting on the desk. “Do you want to read them to me?”
“Oh, um, I…” you said nervously, moving your eyes away from hers. “You, you know it’s embarrassing for me.”
Donna laughed, shaking her head, taking the opportunity to run a hand over your face again, to be captivated by your features. Your cheeks accepted that caress, responding with an increasingly dark red tone.
“You know I love listening to you,” she whispered, moving away so as not to overwhelm you. “Your voice is worthy of the Gods.”
You laughed as you shook your head, giving her a soft slap on the leg.
“Hey, don't say those things to me…” you said in a shy tone, focusing your gaze on the papers, and not on her beautiful, truly beautiful smile. “It makes me nervous.”
“Oh, does it make you nervous when I tell you nice things?” she said in a tender voice, biting her lip. “You're perfect, you know?”
“No, no, I'm not,” you murmured, looking for the chapter you had finished. “If I read you… will you stop talking to me like that?”
“Maybe,” she said, with a mischievous smile.
You indicated for her to sit in a nearby chair, while you cleared your throat.
“Mm, let's see…” you whispered, dying of embarrassment as every time you read out loud, even more knowing that the Angie doll had climbed onto her owner's lap, also willing to listen to your story without spaceships.
Little by little, you related those parts of your novel, which Donna, along with a mysteriously silent Angie, listened attentively.
 “What do you think?” you said, sighing in relief when you finished reading.
The lady in black, with her head resting on one hand, blinked, her smile widening.
“Edgar's story is very tragic,” she commented, with a low voice, moved by the fate of one of your characters.
“Yes, well…” you said, nodding and moving the pages, returning again to your usual shyness. “He can have all the money he wants, but he will never get Regina's love…” you commented.
“Never?” Donna asked, curious about your comment.
You shook your head with a smile.
“Not everyone has to have a happy ending, right?” you said amused.
The lady sighed, getting up from the chair and lowering Angie to the floor.
“I had it,” Donna whispered, helping you get up from the chair with an elegant gesture, placing her hands gently on your waist. “Although I didn't deserve it…”
You enjoyed the contact, the soft hand that placed a lock of hair behind your ear.
“Me neither,” you said in a low voice, intimidated by the intensity of her gaze.
“Nonsense, tesoro, you deserve anything you want,” the lady in black whispered, leaning to your ear and kissing your skin slowly, savoring each of the soft movements of her lips on your neck.
“You’re exaggerating,” you said shyly, laughing nervously at the tickling her kisses did to you.
“Mm,” Donna murmured, sighing and caressing your cheek one last time before slowly pulling away, kissing the back of your hand. “I’m going to go make dinner.”
“Oh, do you need…? Do I help you?” you asked, more confidently.
Donna turned slowly, shaking her head.
“No, tesoro, just rest,” she said softly, walking away from you with her graceful step, the rhythmic sound of her heels clicking on the floor.
You stood still on the floor, but before the doll maker reached the elevator, you walked quickly towards her, placing a hand on her shoulder, drawing her attention.
“Donna,” you said with a shy smile, slowly turning her around and capturing her lips in an improvised kiss, one you rarely felt capable of giving.
She smiled into your lips, cupping your face in her hands, caressing your lips slowly, softly, while you leaned, smiling. Your cheeks were burning with shyness, but also, with love.
The kiss deepened, and seemed to never end. Your hands settled on her chest and hers ran seductively along your waist.
“Amore mio…” she sighed, letting her lips go free, kissing every part of your face, releasing the chastity of her hands, which tickled your arms, your neck. “Principessa…”
You resisted nervously, unable to control those kisses that were increasingly unbridled.
Laughing again, shy at her whispers, which only knew how to praise you, to adore you as if you were something precious, fragile, tremendously valuable, you put your hands on her chest, stopping the passion that was increasingly ardent, because otherwise, you would be unable to do it.
“Donna,” you whispered between kisses, gently moving away, causing a tender growl from the lady, who finally agreed to stop kissing you. “I'm… I'm a bit hungry.”
“Oh, certo…” she murmured, kissing you quickly and running her thumb down your cheek while laughing nervously. “I'm sorry.”
“Don't apologize,” you whispered shyly, with a sincere, sweet smile, a smile like you've never had, one in love, truly in love. “I love your kisses…”
“I love you…” the lady whispered, giving you one last kiss before pulling away again.
“Hey, that's enough! Stop, basta, parad!” Angie shrieked, pushing the lady by her legs. “How disgusting…”
“Angie…” Donna sighed, shaking her head.
“Is the blood reaching your head? I doubt it…” the doll mocked, making the lady blush with a serious look.
“Angie, don't be rude,” the doll maker protested, turning around. “I'll see you right away, amore mio…”
“O-Okay,” you said shyly again, laughing at Angie's impudence. “I'm going to take a bath, I need it.”
“Mmmm,” the lady in black protested, turning on her heels and biting her lip. “(Y/N)… You know I love to do it with you.”
You shrugged in amusement, looking at the floor so your embarrassment wasn't so obvious. The characters in your novel weren't afraid of such things but you... Despite having shared everything with Donna, you were still extremely shy when it came to taking off your clothes next to her.
Your life was perfect, really perfect.
“And this... It's for you...” Donna said as she served dinner, handing you a perfect rose, like every night.
“Oh...” you murmured, smelling the intoxicating scent of the flower. “Donna...”
“Mm?”
“It wasn’t necessary” you said with your voice low, soft and shy as usual. She smiled at you, gesturing with the bottle of wine. “Oh, don't pour too much wine, otherwise, my head will hurt.”
The lady laughed, obeying your request and leaving the bottle on the table, waiting, as always, for you to eat first.
“Do you like it?” she asked, unsure, observing your gestures.
“Very much, darling,” you said kindly, earning another radiant smile from the brunette, who, finally making sure that you enjoyed her food, began to eat. “Thank you…”
The glances crossed as always, the smiles danced between them from time to time, the shine of your eyes reflected the dim light of the candles.
Every night, every moment was the most romantic of your life. Of course, you could envy many things from the books: talkative, outgoing, daring characters... But if there was something that those romance stories were not able to convey, it was the love that existed between you and Donna. That was just impossible.
“How...?” you said nervously, interrupting that silent dinner, wishing to be the one to start a conversation for once, something difficult due to so many years of voluntary silence. “Ahem, how about your...? Your... Dolls?”
Donna looked up, knowing that you were interrupting because of your internal struggle to stop being the shy girl you always were.
“My dolls… Well, I guess they are as usual,” she commented, drinking some wine. “They're not very talkative.”
“Hey!” Angie protested, entertained on a nearby sofa.
“Well, not all of them,” Donna joked, lowering her gaze again.
You nodded. Yes, Donna wasn't the most extroverted and talkative woman in the world either, but at least she tried, and with better results than you, of course.
“I, I'd like to learn how to sew,” you murmured, hiding your shyness in a glass of water. Donna smiled, arching her eyebrow.
“Sew?” the lady asked, with a tender voice, unable to hide a bit of curiosity.
“Yes, well… You must be sick of fixing my dresses,” you commented amused, finishing your plate, looking at the sleeves of your dress, always masterfully mended by the brunette.
“Don't talk nonsense, tesoro, I love sewing for you, and making you dresses…” she commented, winking at you. “You have a perfect body for it.”
“Oh, well…” you said nervously again, running a hand over the back of your neck and looking away. “But, I would really like to learn.”
“Okay, dolcezza, I'll be happy to do it,” Donna said in a soft voice, with a slight blush on her cheeks. “Tomorrow when I get back from the meeting we could start, what do you think?”
“Oh, tomorrow…” you sighed, blinking nervously. “I don't know if I can, I had thought that, since you have a meeting, I could take a walk around the grounds, you know, to get inspired.”
Donna stopped eating, with a slightly more serious, darker look. You didn't expect any other reaction.
All the virtues of the lady in black were enough to make you fall in love, but, like everyone, she also had flaws. The worst of them was her subtle possessiveness, her jealousy, the fear of losing you, something that always led her to overprotect you, to put a bubble wrap on you so nothing dared to harm you.
The lady wiped herself with a napkin, drinking some wine before looking at you suspiciously, perhaps searching for the words to dissuade you.
“Mm, you can wait for me so we can go together,” she murmured, searching for the lie, the deception in your gaze, something that made you even more nervous.
“Yeah, but... Well, it's just that I don't know when you're going to come back,” you said with a voice that was getting weaker and weaker, playing with your cutlery so as not to look at that darkened eye. “Last time it got dark.”
“You know you can't go out alone, (Y/N),” she said abruptly, crossing your arms. “If I come back late, we'll go another day.”
“But Donna... I...” you insisted with a broken voice, with the seriousness of her gaze stabbing a dagger into your heart.
“Basta, (Y/N). We've talked about it many times,” she hissed, clenching her fists on the table, without changing that sinister expression. “You can't go out, it's dangerous.”
“You worry too much,” you murmured, frowning and shaking your head. “Nothing will happen to me, it's still your territory.”
“I worry enough, tesoro,” she whispered, crossing her arms. “I don't know what I would do without you.”
“I think you're exaggerating, darling,” you said with a fake smile. “I don't think anything will happen to...”
“You can't go out!” the woman in black shouted, with an angry voice, losing control, something that happened less and less frequently.
“Donna...” you whispered, scared by her abruptness.
 It shouldn't surprise you, but your soul was suffering to see the love of your life losing control.
“I'm sorry,” she said nervously, looking at the table and shaking her head. “I just... I can't imagine that... (Y/N) you, you can fall off the cliff, you can trip and hurt yourself, do you understand? How do you think I would feel if something happened to you?”
You nodded, calmer as you saw the light in that darkness again. It seemed to take a lot of effort, but little by little, she began to control her problems, more or less.
“Um, Donna,” Angie interrupted, dispelling the uncomfortable tension that had formed between you. “Can you stop being too Donna?”
“It's none of your business,” the brunette hissed, her breathing still labored.
“Come on, silly Donna, (Y/N) is not a dog. You can't have her stuck in the house all day long,” the doll said, defending you. You raised your eyebrows but didn't intervene. “She's not stupid, nothing will happen to her.”
“Am I talking to you?” the lady asked, with a dangerous tone, getting nervous again.
“Now you are,” the puppet joked, laughing amused.
“Ugh…” Donna protested, shaking her head and getting up from the table, approaching you.
The brunette bent down, taking your hands, kneeling on the floor with a different expression, a sad, pleading one.
“Amore mio, I'm sorry…” she said in a soft voice. “I shouldn't have yelled at you.”
You nodded slowly, letting her hands caress you with soft, but trembling hands.
“I'm sorry, per favore, perdonami…” she sighed again, burying her head in your lap, soaking your dress with a tear of sadness and regret. “You are the most important thing in my life, my girl… My soul…”
“Donna…” you sighed, caressing her black hair, calming her demons little by little, comforting her in your arms. “My love…”
“If I lost you, I would…” she sobbed again, raising her head to look into your eyes.
“Shh,” you whispered softly, caressing her cheek. “You won't lose me, I promise. I promise I'll be careful of cliffs, ditches, and anything that could hurt me. Nothing will happen to me, darling, trust me.”
“O-Okay,” she said, nodding, getting up from while kissing you slowly, repentant for her irrational anger. “You're right, tesoro.”
You smiled tenderly, ending that argument.
It was funny. When Donna was in trouble, your informal nature, your self-confidence came back to lend a hand to you. Sometimes you wondered what your life would be like if you hadn't given up socializing, if that desire to talk for hours, to say everything you thought, had remained.
“You're welcome, silly...” Angie whispered, while Donna and you looked at each other in love, in silence, with the sweet glow of forgiveness on her face.
You looked amused at the doll and back at its owner, who shook her head, pulling you up from the chair so she could hug you affectionately, lovingly, letting a sigh run through your bodies as you buried your head in her black dress.
“I love you so much...” she whispered, swaying with you. “I have a hard time believing that you're really with me, it's like a dream.”
“Don't say that,” you said shyly again, with the blush on your cheeks confirming that the bad moment was over. “You know I blush easily…”
“Mm,” she murmured, stealing one last kiss from you before slowly pulling away, her gaze fixed on yours. “I like seeing you blush… You're beautiful, you know?”
“Donna,” you said looking away and giving her a playful punch on the shoulder. “Stop it…”
“Okay, okay,” she laughed amused, leaving you some room again and turning towards the table. “I'm going to pick this up, you… Well, why don't you prepare a movie?”
“Oh, I… Okay,” you said, with the blush limiting your words, walking towards the elevator until a tug on your dress stopped you.
“Hey, you, aren't you forgetting something?” Angie said, crossing her arms with a cocky tone and pose.
“Um…” you murmured, frowning, confused and looking for Donna's help. Unfortunately, the lady was busy with the dishes. “N-no, I don't know,” you stammered.
“I helped you, I demand compensation,” the doll told you, determined to not let you go.
“What do you want? you asked nervously, playing with your hands.
“Oh, it’s not complicated, just one word: Spaceships,” Angie said, with an amused tone.
Not knowing if she was joking or on the contrary, she was serious, you rolled your eyes, without answering back, hitting the elevator button.
The next day, that afternoon, you were finally able to go out for some fresh air. The meetings of the Lords were always something annoying for you, something that took Donna away from you but… That day, you really needed that walk.
Unfortunately for you, that silent walk through the forest was not entirely useful. Your head tried to get inspired, but you were unable to do so. Maybe what you needed was a break.
“Okay…” you said, closing the door of the mansion, scared when you felt a tug on your dress. “Oh, no!” you squealed, thinking that maybe someone had grabbed it.
Your face turned red from embarrassment, but not like when Donna whispered in your ear, this time it was because of the terrible ridicule you had before your eyes.
 In your clumsiness, with your mind wandering through imaginary landscapes, you had closed the door too soon, thus trapping the fabric of your dress.
“I don't believe I'm that stupid…” you muttered, pulling hard on the fabric, unable to open the door again. “Shit!” you screamed when, with a disgusting sound, the fabric tore, ruining one of your dresses, one of the ones Donna made for you. “See? That’s why I wanted to learn how to sew…” you hissed, lamenting, kicking the floor nervously.
Furious, angry with yourself for your clumsiness, cursing in ways you only used when you were alone, you went down to the bedroom to change clothes, searching in your head for the best way to ask the doll maker to fix your dress again.
“Great, (Y/N), you’re stupid…” you said to yourself, opening the closet and looking for a nice dress, one to give her a surprise you thought she deserved.
Rummaging through the clothes, something fell to the floor. It looked like a small box, like a jewelry box. You picked it up, unable to resist the temptation to open it.
Maybe there were the Beneviento family jewels. Maybe some ruby, sapphire, or precious stones would serve as inspiration for some weapon in your novel.
“What?” you said surprised when you saw its contents. There were no rings, no necklaces.
Inside that small box were photographs, a few photographs in which you were the main protagonist.
“No…” you sighed, watching yourself walking to the market, reading alone in a corner… It was obvious, although you couldn't believe it. Donna had been spying on you.
Long before she met you, before she dared to talk to you that day, she had been following you, stalking you without you realizing it.
The thoughts became confused in your mind. That idealization of the lady in black, that feeling of thinking that it wasn't your beauty that attracted her in the first place, blurred as you looked at those photographs.
You shook your head, feeling your stomach sink, how everything you thought was clouded in a fog of betrayal, of deceit.
“Everyone is the same… You too,” you said nervously, with a dark hiss, squeezing one of the photos in your hand.
You, who believed that she was the only one who loved you for who you were inside, and not on the outside, saw that, in reality, the brightness of your eyes, your face, your figure, was what attracted her attention, you didn't know how long ago.
“Why, Donna? Fuck... I thought you were different...” you lamented, passing a hand over your forehead.
Disappointment attacked your feelings, but the love you felt for the lady in black was resilient, even with that disappointment, your heart didn't change sides, it was still with her and it always would be.
“(Y/N)?” her soft voice interrupted your laments. The sound of her heels was getting closer. Apparently, that day, the meeting ended early.
A smiling Donna entered the bedroom, ignoring the scene in front of her, grabbing your waist, leaning you in a chivalrous manner and kissing you in a somewhat old-fashioned way, something that, in other circumstances, drove you crazy.
“I've missed you, tesoro…” she whispered with a tender voice, approaching your lips.
You, angry, upset by your discovery, turned your head away, pushing Donna roughly.
“(Y/N), what…?” the lady asked with a frown at your rejection. “What's wrong with you?”
“What's this, Donna?” you asked hissing, showing the lady one of the photographs, one in which you were calmly reading.
“Oh, I…” she said shyly, blinking in embarrassment due to your discovery, with the smile slowly fading from her face. “Well, I…”
“How long have you been doing this?” you asked, putting the embarrassment aside, demanding explanations with an irrational fury.
“I...I...” she stammered, desperate, nervous, shaking her head.
“I...I...” you scoffed unpleasantly. “Fuck, Donna, I thought you were different!”
“What? No, I, I just...” she said, unable to look you in the eyes, terribly embarrassed.
“You just what? Were you spying on me?” you asked, getting a little closer in a threatening way, making her back off. “Answer!”
“It's not that, I...” she said, breathing heavily. “You, you don't understand.”
“No, of course I don't understand...” you hissed, looking at the ceiling. “Do you know why I fell in love with you?”
Donna shook her head, her body shaking, totally humiliated.
“Because you weren't like the rest, because I thought you looked beyond my physical appearance,” you explained, pointing at her with your finger, forcing her to lower her head, to accept your reprimand.
“But, but I...” the lady interrupted, narrowing her eye. “Listen to me, I...”
“No, I don't want to listen to you, Donna,” you said, nullifying any attempt of the brunette to defend herself, to explain herself. You didn't remember having gotten that nervous, ever. “Why were you doing this? Why were you spying on me?”
“Because, because I... I, I love you...” she stammered, with a sad look. “I fell in love with you before I met you and...”
“So that's why you were secretly taking pictures of me, right? That's creepy, Donna,” you snapped, showing the photograph. “I can't believe it. You're just like everyone else…”
“No, you're wrong, I'm not like them,” the lady in black defended herself, with a tear running down her cheek, reaching out her arms to grab yours, something you prevented with an unpleasant gesture.
“You've shown me… I'm just a pretty face to you, aren't I?” you said in an ironic tone. “I always was. If you loved me before you met me it means that the only thing you cared about was my appearance, right? Then fuck you!” you shouted furiously, crumpling the photograph in your hands and letting it fall to the floor.
You were completely unhinged. Not even you could understand the reason for your anger, you simply couldn't.
“No…No, no, no, no,” Donna sobbed, throwing herself to the floor and grabbing the photograph, smoothing it again with trembling hands. “That’s my favorite…” you whispered, holding it tightly against her chest.
“They’re right about you, you’re a sick nutcase,” you hissed without thinking, letting out all that irrational rage.
Donna didn’t respond. She just closed her eye shifting on her stomach with your picture on her chest, crying inconsolably.
A spark of sanity came back to your mind, making you put a hand over your mouth, aware of what you had just said, of the damage you had done to poor Donna just because your beauty made you feel self-conscious, just because that was the reason for your hermetic attitude. You didn't want to be a pretty face, not to her.
“Gods...” you sighed, shaking your head and putting a hand on the shoulder of the lady, who was still crying inconsolably. “Gods, Donna, forgive me, I didn't mean that.”
“I just wanted...” she murmured, her voice broken by sobs. “I wanted to see you all the time... I knew, I knew I could never have you so... I took pictures of you secretly but, but it's not what you think... It's not that... It's not that!”
“Don't you understand how bad makes me feel that you noticed me because of my looks?” you asked in a softer, calmer tone.
“Is that really a bad thing?” the lady asked, putting the photograph back in the box.
You remained thoughtful, stepping back.
“N-No, I don't know,” you murmured unsurely, calming your breathing. “The truth is, I…”
“You are the most beautiful girl I’ve ever met,” Donna said, putting the box away in the closet, controlling her sobs. “I don't care if you hate me saying it. I'm not going to stop doing it.”
“Donna…” you sighed, relaxing little by little, regretting your attitude.
“Yes, I fell in love with you, always so quiet, reading anywhere, with that smile…” she whispered, bringing her trembling hand closer to your face. “You are like a Goddess to me, better than a Goddess… But I… I knew that I could never have you, that you would never love someone like me. I limited myself to looking at you from afar, dreaming of your beauty, until that day…”
“What day?” you asked, tilting your head, with a serious face, but with your eyes shining.
“The day you were talking to that boy, when you were telling him a story,” she said, without looking at you, still nervous. “Then I had no choice but to do something. Besides being a beautiful girl, you were smart, you had imagination. I had to meet you, (Y/N). I had to know if your beauty also touched your soul… And it really did.”
“That's… Very, very nice,” you said with an involuntary smile, lifting her chin. “Donna, Gods, I went too far… Forgive me…”
“I’ll always forgive you, (Y/N), you are the love of my life,” she said, placing her hand in yours. “Don't worry about the photos, I… If they disgust you that much… I'll, I'll get rid of them.”
“No, wait, honey,” you said, stopping the lady from bending down again to pick up the box. “Wait, my love… No, it's not necessary…”
“I would never do anything to hurt you, (Y/N), I live to take care of you, to love you…” Donna murmured, caressing your face erratically.
“I know, Donna, I…” you stammered, losing yourself in her gaze, in her sincere words of love. “Donna…” you sobbed, burying yourself in her arms, hugging your lover tightly, calming the delusions of your mind.
Her embrace was warm, comforting as always, strong, safe… In your head you regretted your attitude, that fury, the absurd transformation of your personality due to the interest people had in you, a physical interest, without feelings, a superficial vision of what you were on the outside and not on the inside.
The things the lady in black did, the photographs, didn't matter. Little by little you began to realize that it wasn't important.
What was important to her wasn't your appearance. It was that your beauty was linked to your soul, to your intelligence.
“Honey…” you sighed nervously, caressing her cheek, letting her arms cradle you. She looked back at you, nodding for you to speak. “Forgive me. I'm sure you'd like me to be a little more talkative or outgoing but… It's just that… Everything, everything that's happened to me, my disappointments… I…”
“Shh, don't go on, darling. It doesn't matter… I like the way you are, I love you just the way you are…” she whispered, kissing your lips softly, mixing your salty tears with the dance of a loving kiss, a sincere one, one that ended that horrible moment you both suffered.
Donna pulled away, making an effort to give you a smile, one that made your cheeks shine again with that blushing tone.
“Mm?” the lady in black murmured, when her gaze strayed to the torn sleeve of your dress. “What happened to your dress?”
“It's just that...” you murmured, moving your ankle, embarrassed. “The door caught me.”
“The door,” she said, with an amused expression, studying the damage of the seam. “Don't worry, dolcezza, I'll fix it.”
“You always fix everything, don't you?” you said shyly, looking down, only being able to hear her nervous laugh, a sweet and tender one. “Okay, let... Let me...”
Your feelings sent signals to your head as you moved away from the lady, with your cheeks flushed and your hands tremblingly traveling to the buttons of your dress, slowly undoing them, one by one.
“Tesoro, what..?” Donna asked, looking at you curiously, watching how, controlling your shyness, you took off the sleeves of your arms, thus revealing your partially covered torso.
“Shh, I'm embarrassed if you talk,” you whispered nervously. “Just let me do it by myself”
She nodded, not wanting to bother you, to intimidate you, running her gaze over all the parts of your body that were gradually becoming exposed.
“Sei una dea della bellezza,” the lady in black murmured, breathing nervously in front of your half-naked body.
“Don't even talk to me like that. Don't use Italian against me. You know I'm embarrassed…” you protested amused, grunting in shame, unable to hold her gaze.
You could sense a smile as she approached, surrounding your body with her hands, caressing your waist, your back, lifting your chin so your blushing face looked at hers.
“I will never be tired of saying how beautiful you are,” she whispered in your ear, with that melodic voice that always made you squirm, while her soft, delicate hands took advantage of your distraction to act on the clasp of your bra, unbuttoning it instantly.
You laughed again, resisting the embarrassing impulse of your hands, which asked you to cover yourself. Fighting your own shyness, you succeeded, while Donna helped you face that absurd shame with a soft kiss from her lips, with some sensual caresses on your bare back.
“Donna…” you whispered, letting yourself be carried away by the humidity of those tender kisses, by the glances, by the sighs, by that increasingly warm, an increasingly anxious atmosphere.
Your dress fell down your legs, crashing against the floor irremediably, making a shiver run through your legs, the cold making the hairs on your skin stand on end.
“Come here, amore mio… This horrible floor is not worthy of your footsteps…” Donna whispered, lifting you in her arms in an elegant way, raising your half-naked body to lay it on the bed.
“Why are you so tender?” you asked amused, crawling across the mattress, closely followed by the brunette, who began to get rid of her own clothes without taking her gaze off yours, a look of admiration, of faith, of adoration to your body, to you.
She didn't answer, she simply moved the black dress away from her body, approaching you little by little, running her hands over your legs, over your waist... Leaning down after a sigh and kissing you again.
They were sweet, tender kisses but they betrayed the passion that had begun to form in the dark bedroom. The blush on your cheeks didn't want to leave your skin, shame refused to give you a break.
You were sure that every time your lover ran her hand over your face, her skin burned from your heat.
You laughed shyly when Donna exposed her bare torso as well, when she did with her hands what yours were incapable of doing, uncovering the beautiful woman beneath that black fabric, that pale, soft skin you were addicted to.
A brave arm pulled her head, returning her lips to where they belonged, directly to yours.
Her hips began to dance over yours. The heat of her body was mixing with yours. The kisses became fiercer, wilder as her fingers enjoyed your body, the shapes and curves you were born with, that kind of cursed blessing your beauty was.
“Gods… I love you…” Donna whispered, shaking her head, unable to repress her excitement any longer, pulling down your underwear with a soft movement, studying your embarrassed face, your gaze desperately searching for a place to focus on that wasn't her body.
“I love you,” you repeated, trembling as that hand ran down your chest, the other spreading your legs, exposing you completely.
The wine seemed pale compared to your cheeks. Your whole body trembled nervously as Donna finished undressing, as she positioned herself on top of you, ready to make you hers.
“Please, if you want me to stop, just…” she said, looking for the doubt in your eyes, that unmovable blush on your cheeks when her erection brushed the moisture of your folds, when you saw for yourself what you were doing to her body.
“No, no, Donna…” you said, gaining confidence due to that obscene, lustful touch, one that you had already experienced, but that you had a hard time getting used to. “Just… Don’t, don't look at me, okay?”
The brunette laughed, delaying her entrance and shaking her head, running a hand over your reddish cheeks and another one over your leg, scratching it without harming you.
“You can't ask me that…” she whispered with a smile distorted by desire, while her hips forced her to move so as not to lose that wet contact. “Watching you is my greatest hobby… You can close your eyes.”
You obeyed, writhing from the sensations her hard shaft sent to your body, not wanting to see her gaze when making love to you, not wanting to feel the shame that would prevent you from enjoying.
“Ah, Donna…” you gasped when she finally entered slowly, letting your wet entrance adapt, without forcing, enjoying the moisture that surrounded her, the ease with which your body accepted that invasion.
“Am I hurting you, amore mio?” Donna asked in an almost silent whisper, moving more slowly until she entered completely.
You, unable to say a word, unable to bear that incredible pleasure, shook your head, running your hands around her waist, bringing her even closer to you. That gesture reached the brunette, who quickly understood the message, you wanted her to move.
You would never say anything, you would never ask for anything. The only thing you could do without dying of embarrassment was to moan, to say her name, but never interrupt or dare to ask her for something different.
The wet sound of your bodies was accompanied by discreet moans, by the random sound of your lips colliding with each other in a disorderly manner. Everything gave you pleasure: her hands, her erection deforming your walls, her soft caresses, her reassuring, flattering whispers…
You were stupid. You would never give up that, the comfort of her body inside yours, the love and understanding that only Donna could give you.
In the middle of that lustful festival, your arms moved alone, running down her back, enjoying her skin when you thought she didn't notice, when the soft but determined movements of her hips began to become erratic.
Her hands also lost their tenderness, gently grabbing your legs, lifting them at will. Just thinking about that look, that eye shining with desire as she took you… Just with that thought you let out a louder moan and your hips began to want to keep up.
It was an intense rhythm, embarrassing but not wanting to miss anything, wanting to enjoy each one of those wonderful sensations, that very sexual, erotic and hot way that Donna had of expressing her love for you.
“(Y/N)…” she moaned, losing the rhythm, moaning faster, unable to control her movements, scratching your legs, your fragile skin.
That only made you tense up, scream, say words you would never say while you noticed how your body contracted, how your walls played with her erection, hugging it, holding it, squeezing it until, overwhelmed by the pleasure of your orgasm, she released herself inside you, stopping her body as close to yours as possible, with her legs shaking and her seed sending soft and wet caresses to you.
“My love…” you sighed when the lady fell exhausted on your chest, catching her breath little by little, with a smile, not wanting to leave your wet and warm body.
“(Y/N)… Ti amo, ti amo…” she repeated over and over again, finally coming out of you and covering your face with kisses, settling you under the sheets, letting her body surround yours, protecting it from shame, from your fears…
“Donna,” you said, snuggling up to her, controlling your still agitated breathing, melting into her body in a tender embrace, far from the lust of moments before. That was the true reward, for which you fought day after day with her insecurities and with yours.
Her hugs, her caresses, her fingers tangling in your hair… That was much better than Paradise, much more pleasurable than anything else.
“Are you okay?” the lady asked after a few minutes in which your breathing was the only soundtrack. Her voice was tired, exhausted from the effort, but always, always in love.
“Yes…” you sighed, snuggling up a little more, wrapping her other arm around yourself, daring to look at her smiling face, making your ears delight in her soft and affectionate laughter. “I've never been better…”
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Hi
I know this is a really stupid question but what does it mean when people say "If you can take that detail out and it doesn't change the story, it doesn't belong there"?
I have autism so that's probably why I'm not understanding, but to me it doesn't make sense. If I take something out, it will change the story, because,,, I'm literally taking something out. I'm changing it. The story had something, and now it doesn't.
I just don't know how to figure out what "doesn't belong".
It always seems like people use that "advice" whenever it comes to a character being disabled/POC/gay/etc. so I'm a little wary of it tbh.
When Removing a Detail Changes a Story Fundamentally vs Superficially
If you remove a detail from your story, no matter how small, it "changes" the story in that the detail is no longer there. However, there's a difference between a fundamental change (something that changes the story dramatically) versus a superficial change (something that changes the story in a trivial way.)
For example, let's say you have a scene where your character is eating ice cream with a friend, and they vehemently ask for no cherry on top. Does the cherry, and whether or not your character mentions it, have any bearing on the story later? Does your character's vehement rejection of the cherry tell us anything critical about the character?
Let's say that the cherry is important because as a result of this vehement rejection, we learn that the character is allergic to sulfides (which are used in the productions of maraschino cherries), and this sulfide allergy becomes important later in the story. Removing this moment, where they vehemently ask for no cherry on top, would fundamentally change the story because without it, the reader wouldn't learn that the character has a sulfides allergy, which becomes important later. This is a change that would deeply affect the story.
On the other hand, let's say the character doesn't have a sulfides allergy, they just don't like cherries, and this is not an important character detail and never comes up again. In this case, this vehement rejection of the cherry on top doesn't add anything to the story. Removing it only changes the story superficially, not in a way that matters.
So, to tell whether or not removing a detail would fundamentally change the story, ask yourself: "Does removing this detail prevent the story from playing out the way I planned it? Does removing this detail mean the reader won't understand a character or something that happens later?" If the answer to one or both of these questions is "yes," that makes it a fundamental change. If the answer to both questions is "no," it's a superficial change.
When it comes to the details of diversity like race, culture, religion, disability, sexual orientation, and gender identity, the issue tends to be more about making sure you're not just "painting on" this detail of diversity. Like... you can have a character who uses a wheelchair without that detail being the most important thing about the character, and without it playing a major role in the story, but you also need to make sure you create a thoughtful, authentic portrayal of a person who uses a wheelchair. In other words, you wouldn't want to gloss over or trivialize the ways in which being in a wheelchair affects the character. For example, let's say you have a group of characters who are solving a mystery and it requires them to go into an old abandoned house on a rocky hillside. The only way to access the house is up a flight of wobbly rock steps. You wouldn't want to just illustrate the character effortlessly wheeling themselves up these steps, because that would be unrealistic and inauthentic. At that point, the wheelchair just becomes a detail that's "painted on" because it doesn't really have any impact on the character or the story. But, if you show the other characters helping this character up the steps, or finding an alternate route for them to use, that makes sure this detail (that they use a wheelchair) isn't superficial.
The best way to make sure you create a thoughtful, authentic portrayal of a diverse character--when you, yourself, do not share that diversity trait--is to make sure you have a qualified sensitivity reader who does share that trait (and potentially more than one if possible) so they can let you know if there are issues with your portrayal.
Let me know if you have further questions!
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vidavalor · 2 days
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How do you think the Ineffable Husbands reacted to the 1914 Christmas Armistice?
Also, it is autumn now and very cloudy and soggy, so here is a seasonally-appropriate recipe: https://www.hairybikers.com/recipes/view/caramelised-apple-cheesecake
Aw, a recipe! You're lovely. 😊 That looks amazing!
I envy you being in one firm season over there. September is a transition month here in New England. Half-summer, half-fall. It's very strange, though, not terrible. One day is lemonade and watermelon and the next is where's my blanket? and I need an apple something and looking up what day Bake Off starts to air over here. Another week, though, and it'll be pretty much fall from here on out. Definitely going to make that cheesecake. 😊
I think they probably reacted to the Christmas Armistice the same way many of us do when we learn about it-- that it's both beautiful and morbidly depressing at once. It showed people coming together to express a sense of shared humanity but then they went back to killing one another afterwards. It wasn't a new story for Crowley and Aziraphale because they had seen that in people all throughout history but I'm sure they found the same mix of hopefulness and sadness in it that a lot of people do.
The one who understands what it takes to bring about peace now best in the series is actually Gabriel, imho. It's because he understood the deeper meaning of Sandalphon's words that Sandalphon didn't actually understand himself: "you can't have a war without war."
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Some short thoughts on ties between war, frozen peas, and one of my favorite of Agnes Nutter's prophecies beneath the cut.
When Sandalphon said: "you can't have a war without war", what he meant was: "Look how clever I think I am to use this word twice in two ways in one sentence! You can't have a war without War: The Character! Mirelle Enos is playing a character that shares a name with large-scale killing and destruction and I pointed it out! I'm so smart!"
Gabriel, though, heard the potential of bigger ideas: "You can't have a war (a large-scale military conflict) without war (people willing to fight in a war and, also, a person's inner struggle leading them to be willing to fight in war)."
Meaning: A war can only happen if people are willing to fight the war.
Meaning: No soldiers, no war.
Gabriel knew Aziraphale heard it like that, too, and was like lol Aziraphale, this guy thinks he's a poet omg let me flatter him enough that he won't notice that I just tried to help you sell more erotica and didn't murder you for having a lover and then we'll get out of here...
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Gabriel saying that he "might use that one day" about what Sandalphon says is a line that-- delightfully-- ages quite differently the more we get to know Gabriel.
We know he said it in that moment to make it sound like he was telling Sandalphon that what Sandalphon had said was just so profound that Gabriel was tempted to use it himself... but we also know that Gabriel is neither as dumb nor as vapid as he strategically lets people think he is and that he understood the deeper way of looking at what Sandalphon said more than Sandalphon did.
Looking back on it, it's Gabriel actually joking about mutinying in front of Heaven's most fervent Metatron-worshipping fascist in a way that is very much going over Sandalphon's head. Gabriel is all can't have a war without war-- yeah, true dat, Stasi a Fond. I'm slowly losing it over here and my favorite fantasy is just peacing out entirely of this whole 'Commander of The Heavenly Host' shit and wouldn't that really completely eff up The Ineffable Plan? Oh, my secret daydream... if only I could...
Then, what happens, though, by the end of S1?
Gabriel sees a kid do just that.
The eleven year old spawn of Satan is all yeah, no, you can't have a war without war. I don't want to start a war. I like the world. I've got enough on my plate dealing with my own life-- I don't want to rule over everyone. I want everyone to feel at peace and be happy and take care of each other.
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Gabriel was freaked out because of the consequences of this and the fact that he, at the the time, thought The Metatron might kill him for failing to start Armageddon but, after the day was over and Gabriel had a moment to breathe and think about it, you can't tell me he didn't hear Adam saying that it was too much pressure to be in charge of every other living being in existence and he just wanted to chill with the people he liked and live his own life in peace and let everyone else do that, too and think to himself:
Yeah, kid. Me too.
The dude who is told he's responsible for everyone in Heaven and who sees angels falling as partly his fault and whom the humans deify and to whom they make statues was like fucking hell, the little antichrist brat was right.
He realized that it's not about Armageddon, it's about living and building a life until you have all the world you need. It's about what Crowley and Aziraphale have been trying to do and about what he and Beez were as well. Gabriel's proposal to Beez is a simple one:
What if, instead of Armageddon, there was no Armageddon?
What if, instead of war, there's no war?
So, he ended up fulfilling his own prophecy a bit when the one day came when he used what Sandalphon said-- just not in the way that Sandalphon meant it but in the way that Gabriel himself and Aziraphale heard it: you can't have a war without war... no war exists if enough people refuse to fight it.
That's the way to stop Armageddon.
Gabriel came to realize that the best thing he could do as a leader in Heaven and commander of its armed forces was to refuse to fight, come what may. He quits the army and defects to the embassy of the only independent country that exists in the supernatural world: the United States of Crowley and Aziraphale.
As Agnes said:
...the calm cometh when Redde and Whyte and Black and Pale approache to Peas is Our Professioune.
In this case: Redde/Red (Crowley), Whyte/White (Aziraphale), Black (Beez), Pale (Gabriel). To profess: to state. Peas = the talking of frozen peas because homophone: peace.
The calm cometh when Crowley, Aziraphale, Beez and Gabriel talk and each get closer to their own peace and to peace with one another and help each other to spread that mentality throughout all those willing in Heaven and Hell and Earth.
That's what you feed the other ducks-- your frozen peas. Your own stuff that is disturbing your own inner peace and creating inner wars and small-scale conflicts that, if left unchecked, can build into larger-scale ones.
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If you break that shit down and talk about it, there needn't be any war.
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Sometimes, it means shedding some armor, keeping an open mind, and admitting that you were wrong-- all things that can be difficult...
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...especially for those are secretly tender-hearted but put up that armor to survive in worlds steeped in toxic masculinity...
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...and, sometimes, it's maddening because people are scared and get set in their ways and do dumb shit and you have to upend power structures and reinforce more positive behaviors to get them to shut up long enough to start listening to one another...
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...but the more who learn to unlearn the harmful stuff at the core of their own struggles and who open their minds up to listening to others, the more we're professing our peas to our fellow ducks and getting closer to peace within ourselves and within the world as a whole and that's what it's all about. It might always be approaching Peas is Our Professioune rather than a perfectly peaceful world but the point is the effort of the approach and to just keep making steady progress as much as we can while we're walking the Earth. After all...
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buckevantommy · 1 day
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i'm finally watching the finale of 9-1-1 season 4. can we get more of mehta please? bring him back 👨‍🚒. buck hauling eddie bodily into the truck? a sight to behold 🥵. buck playing medic? love that 🩹.
on a main note: the opening sequence, but especially that lengthy moment where buck tells eddie to hold on, that's pretty gay lbr. idk how y'all survived watching this live with ppl saying you were crazy for reading into it. because i see it, i get it.
i've been watching the series for the first time and haven't really seen much to ship up until this point. but the entire opening scene is the first big buddie moment for me tbh. i mean there was the mud-well collapse, and the 'go for the title' kitchen scene, but i can't really think of any other standout moments that made me recognise what the shippers were latching onto (some of the christmas stuff was pretty cute though).
i do think a great majority of the moments up to this point have been one-sided by buck (unconsciously) - which i love, because obviously we now have canon bi!buck so it makes sense for his character - even if it wasn't confirmed or intended back then it now exists as evidence of his bisexuality. and even though i think s7!buck (and beyond) doesn't harbor any lingering romantic or sexual feelings for eddie, i do think he had them through the years without realising, and then those unrealised feelings shifted and faded.
anyways. i think it does buck's character a disservice to not acknowledge the buddie in his history, whether by the fandom at large or by those involved with the show. i still wouldn't call myself a buddie shipper (yet?) but this episode opener (and i assume a good portion of the remaining ep) is very much about them - or more accurately: about buck's feelings for eddie (and yes, it also highlights buck's tendency to feel things more starkly, intensely, and unrestrained than others, especially when his loved ones are hurt). there are certainly buddie threads throughout the series so far but i don't think it's a stretch to say this ep is the most intense and noticible of buddie story weaves - even if it's only one-sided; but is it? tbd.
but back to this ep: we deserve to see buck covered in blood once more. his blood, a victim's blood, a loved one's blood.. it's been too long. 🫠
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terukotime · 15 hours
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allow me to be super delulu for a second
if either Eden or Ace are the actual killer, that would mean one of them would be saying their secret quotes in the next coming episodes. but...do we really feel like the situation warrants them saying what their quotes are?
Ace's is: "I don't know what to do with myself anymore."
Eden's is: "You can't go back, no matter how hard you try."
Ace's feels a little strange to say in the trial. we're very close to unearthing the real culprit, and if Ace really is the killer, when would he say that? immediately upon being found out? the quote itself has their air of melancholy and defeatism, and even at his lowest, we know Ace isn't someone to concede or go down without a fight. and if he knows he's about to die, what's the point in saying "I don't know what to do with myself anymore" when he's not even going go be alive in the next few moments? He WON'T be doing anything with himself anymore, he'll be dead.
Eden's, while not as strange of a thing to say as Ace, is also kind of peculiar. when would she say it? while she's admitting to the murder? if Eden did it, sure, it's believable that she'd feel some regret, but the setup to her being the killer feels very odd now that we've gone through this big emotional moment between her and Teruko. honestly, after all that, if Eden really is the killer, i'd be more inclined to believe she WOULDN'T regret killing Arei. it'd seem like her crying and pleading was all just emotional manipulation. it also seems strange to me that Eden would have already had it in mind to kill Arei when she and Teruko found Ace, and took the opportunity to steal the tape to carry it out. i could definitely be wrong, and please correct me if i am, but i think the attempted murder was the same day as what happened with Eden and Arturo? honestly, even if it wasn't, it just feels weird to me that Eden would find some way to disguise her handwriting, set up a murder method even more elaborate than Nico's original version, and then do the whole trial pleading and sobbing for people to believe she didn't kill her and actually have regretted her actions. that shit is so premeditated that everything Eden has done thus far feels like immense emotional manipulation. while that could still be possible...it's not really that satisfying, i'd say. who knows, maybe i'm in severe denial, but i just think this characterization of Eden would be really weird. it would feel less like a betrayal of "man, this character i liked turned out to be awful", and more like a betrayal of "man, this character i liked has made a 180° in their personality without any foreshadowing of having a darker side to them".
and i'm just still really hung up on Hu. her secret quote, "I want to pay for what I've done. But even then, I still want to live." makes total sense in the context of this trial, especially after her secret reveal. and while it's pretty unlikely she took the tape from the gym, there's no guarantee that the person who took the tape at the time HAS to be the murderer. i'm just still hung up on the fact that it feels like there needs to be one last, big twist before the true killer is revealed. a moment where Teruko comes to her realization and the culprit is selected before she makes any actual accusation against them. we already knew Eden and Ace would be the ones Teruko was going to interrogate in the selection because of her explanation. just given how drdt has been written thus far, i feel like they wouldn't hand the potential answer to us like that so easily. like we wouldn't get to the point of selecting the culprit with the story already telling us it can only be one of two suspects.
it's entirely possible that i'm just coping and am refusing to accept that one of my favorite characters is actually the culprit. or that drdt could have a trial that isn't greatly written. it's totally fine if i'm wrong and Eden or Ace really is the killer, i definitely won't enjoy it much but it's not my story, nor would it completely make me drop drdt.
i honestly just needed to rant LMAO. this episode left me with a LOT of feelings.
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theotherpacman · 2 days
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got s1 is really a very faithful adaptation of agot, with only minor divergences. sometimes I really love the little details in the book that the show doesn't have room for, but sometimes I like the decisions the show made differently.
things I appreciate about the book:
the fact that jon is 14 makes his naivete regarding the wall hit so much harder. he's just a little boy and he's willing to sign his whole life away bc he believes he can be a part of something noble... neither his father nor his uncle nor anyone else tells him that to take the black is a grim sentence steeped in shame
ned hearing that bran's direwolf saved his life and being like "holy shit I killed one of them... what the fuck did I do"
sandor just whole ass traumadumping on 11-year-old sansa completely unprompted and then when he realizes he's just made himself vulnerable for literally no reason he goes "if you tell anyone about this I'll fucking kill you"
mormont thinks jon will be disappointed that bran is now a cripple but jon is so ecstatic bran's alive that he picks up tyrion lannister and spins him around (tyrion is startled by this) and then proceeds to cheerfully make friends with a guy who hates his guts bc jon kicked his absolute ass in training
tyrion and bronn starting to become friends on the way to the vale <3
THAT SINGER BITCH i love him
"whatever you may believe of me, lady stark, I promise you this -- I never bet against my family" screaming crying throwing up
jon going to maester aemon and convincing him to let sam take his vows!!!! using the metaphor of the maester's chain to make his point about how just bc sam is different that doesn't mean he's useless!!!!!!!
TYRION FIGHTING IN THE BATTLE AGAINST ROBB'S MEN!!!!! THE SHOW DID HIM SO FUCKING DIRTY i get that they didn't have as big a budget back then but come on man ToT
"when the sun rises in the west and sets in the east. when the seas go dry and the mountains blow in the wind like leaves. when your womb quickens again, and you bear a living child. then he will return, and not before." LET THE BARRENNESS BE PART OF THE CURSE why did they cut that
when tywin says "because you are my son" tyrion fucking Hates him for that bc he knows that if jaime were he tywin wouldn't spare him a second glance, he's only Tywin's Son now that jaime is prisoner and might die at the hands of the starks
things I appreciate about the show:
arya shooting a bullseye from behind bran. queen
jaime being a dick to everyone all the time for no reason. just going around starting shit. also that scene outside robert's bedroom where he talks to jory. jaime in general
ROS!!!!! MY GIRL ROS MY ABSOLUTE QUEEN ROS
"she's our guest." "she's our prisoner." "do you find the two to be mutually exclusive in your experience, my lord?" lmaooooo get his ass maester luwin
"sometimes possession,,,,, is an abstract concept"
THE DRINKING GAME!!!! first of all it gives us more insight into shae as a person who is so different from tyrion's established worldviews, secondly tyrion is always going around saying offensive shit and he thinks nothing of it bc a) people say offensive shit to him all the time and that's one of the ways he deals with it and b) he's usually right BUT when he makes all those assumptions about shae he's totally wrong and she stands up for herself, but my favorite part of that scene is that tyrion is hesitant to share this traumatic story from his past but he's just made bronn and shae confront their traumas so now he has to share too. and I think that's beautiful
all of varys and petyr's bitchy conversations when they're alone in the throne room
this only covers the first book/season I might make more of these as I keep reading
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serickswrites · 3 days
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Hey :)
Can you write a fic where whumpee is new to the team and has a dark mysterioys past - so when their framed as a traitor the team believes them.There beaten up by some members of team despite protests of not being the traitor and given to whumper o put in custody who posses as a good person and planned it all to have them.
The team eventually uncovers the truth that whumper is bad and is actually the traitir-however whumper already tortured whumpee-sexually assaulting them,branding their name into their arm.When they break into whumper's place-whimper is already dead courtesy if whumpee who managed to free thrmselvez and kill them-however they collapse upon seeing their team.
The team us guilt ridden and doesn't know how to make amends and team leader feels like a failure
It's ok if your not interested in doing it♡
Anon, Anon, Anon! When I tell you that I have had an idea like this on my back burner for a while, I cannot tell you how long it has sat there. I have scrapped this story twice. But, because you are voicing exactly what I wanted to write several times, I'm going to do this. This is a series and will be posted under the title "Monster"
Please enjoy!
Warnings: betrayal, physical violence, unconsciousness, captivity, restraints
"Leave your weapon on the table," Team Leader said coldly as they watched Smallest Teammate.
Smallest Teammate was confusion. What had happened? Team Leader never talked to them like this. "What, I don't understand? What--"
"Put your weapon on the table," Team Leader ordered.
"We know who you really are," Teammate One hissed.
Smallest Teammate's mouth went dry. "I can explain, let me--"
"You sold us out!" Teammate Two stepped forward angrily. "You sold us out after we accepted you!"
Before Smallest Teammate could open their mouth, Teammate Two swung, their fist connecting with Smallest Teammate's cheek. Smallest Teammate didn't try to fight back. They hunched over themself as Teammate Two and Teammate Three surged forward.
"You sold us out!"
"How could you!"
"Whumper revealed exactly who you are!"
Teammate One's words froze Smallest Teammate's heart. Whumper. Whumper had infiltrated the team. Whumper had found them. "I'm not....Whumper....they..." Smallest Teammate couldn't get a good word in as the team was unrelenting in their beating.
"I don't want to hear another lie from you," Team Leader said, their voice very close. Smallest Teammate could see them through the flailing limbs of their team. "You lied to all of us. You lied to me. And you sold us, all of us, out."
"Pl-Pl-Please," Smallest Teammate tried. Their body hurt. Everything hurt. The team was relentless in their beating. If they fought back, they would prove Whumper right. And so they had to hope that the team wouldn't kill them.
"Whumper has graciously offered to take you off our hands and turn you into the proper authorities," Team Leader sneered as they stared down at Smallest Teammate. "They will be here soon to collect you."
And though Smallest Teammate wanted to respond, wanted to beg for mercy. They couldn't. The darkness that had edged their vision for so long as becoming all consuming. They could only hope that Team Leader would realize their mistake sooner rather than later. And that Whumper wouldn't kill them yet.
Tags: @acer-whumpstuff
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Do you ever mix up names? I love your stories, but I am shit at names and as your pantheon/league grows I find myself increasingly turned around by all the north american dude names (first, last, AND hockey nicknames!!!). I can usually keep track of the on-going series names and names that are less common in North America (Kiro, Sven), but if I'm reading, say, an ask or rereading I usually have remind myself who is who first.
I don't mix them up between themselves and other characters in either a similar name way (James vs Jake, say) or roles (mixing up say, Wheels and Craney and Matty).
(This got so long and off topic, why does this always happen)
What I do mix up is sort of more of a...muscle memory thing, maybe? I'm writing the word, say, gorgeous, and I have to delete georgieous first, because my fingers apparently have become a phone's autocorrect function. I actually did write James as Jake a few times when I was deep deep in editing BTT, but again, it was just sort of like...an autofill error between my brain and my fingers.
The names themselves I'm pretty good with, though I do worry about whether I'll continue to be as a) the pantheon continues to expand (I love this by the way, and now I'm probably going to spend the rest of my evening mentally assigning characters places in the pantheon) and b) I get older. And both things seem pretty inevitable to me.
Unfortunately, the two things I appear to have in common with Leo Tolstoy are brevity and 'these people have three names, and I'm going to use them all interchangeably'. (ie Vinny is Thomas to himself, but Vinny to literally everybody else including me. And sometimes Tommy but only to Anton and his parents and only sometimes. Anton's alternately Anton, Petrov, Tony to Vinny and teammates, or Antosha to his family.)
I'd honestly apologise for it but it's one of those things that's really inextricable from the sort of...falling into a perspective way that I write, the same way I write in American English for American characters and Canadian English for Canadians, or use Christian (and specifically Catholic) references in Robbie or Georgie's POVs but never, say, Mike's or David's, unless we count Mike's very liberal usage of the word goddamn (and it's lowercase with him, but it'd be Goddamn to Robbie.)
And the different vocabularies extends to names. Like William Dineen is William to Robbie, he specifically asked to be called that when he was a teenager who wanted to feel more adult, and Robbie respected that then and continues to now. Georgie respected it in another way -- he was Willy to him, and now he uses Will, which William is fine with, but only with immediate family.
But in the text itself Georgie would never use William, because it'd feel distant to him, and Robbie would never use Will because he'd consider that disrespectful after William specifically requested to be called that, and me choosing one or the other wouldn't be in character, so he's Will and he's William, but never Willy (that's Tate Williams).
I make this all sound like a much more conscious process than it is. A lot of this stuff I've only figured out via metacognition of my writing process, which is, by necessity, done in hindsight.
My original answer to questions like 'why did you do _____ that way?' is invariably '*shrug* felt right', and people tend to find that...unsatisfying, so I often investigate further, and the answer becomes 'felt right because of <this reason I was in no way consciously aware of during the writing process>'. As I've said to my poor beleaguered editor, a lot of my writing process is 'just vibes'. I follow good vibes. Bad vibes tell me something's not working, and I adjust accordingly. I think a lot (I cannot tell you how many times I've been accused of overthinking things), but when it comes to writing, most of it's happening beyond my own perception, so instead it feels more like gut instinct. (which is, indeed, what gut instinct often boils down to: pattern recognition going on beneath one's conscious awareness)
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beauty-and-passion · 22 hours
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Did you see Thomas Sanders' YouTube community post about his plans for videos, including Sanders Sides?
... well, it looks like something happened in the SaSi fandom. Jeez, I cannot leave for a couple months to celebrate the Gravity Falls renaissance, that Mr. Sanders decides to pull up some stunts while I wasn't looking :P
Maybe he hoped I wouldn't notice. That I was gone. Well, unfortunately for him, I am always around - and if I lose something, there are always nice people ready to give me a heads-up. So here I am again, ready to give my unrequested two cents about the latest updates.
A lot of things happened since dear anon wrote me this ask, so I will not talk about one single post (also because I have no idea what post the anon was referring to :P) but I will briefly talk about the latest info taken straight from the ts_criticism tag, which is always the most updated place regarding SaSi.
No, Mr. Sanders' updates do not count, considering they're non-existent.
_____________
Season 2 finale: to watch or not to watch?
There was a survey going on in the criticism tag regarding the season 2 finale and whether people would watch it on YouTube, another platform, or just ignore it.
Now we can tell ourselves all the stories we want, but at the end of the day, we know everyone will watch it - no matter if on Thomas' YouTube page or somewhere else.
And even though we already know it will never be worth the years of waiting, I am sure everyone will still give it a chance. The view count will be high.
But if that's true for part one, who knows what will happen for all other parts? What if part 1 is not worth the wait? Will people still be willing to give a try to the other parts? Will they be willing to wait who knows how long for them?
_____________
The hilariously bad Brei Grace situation
Is it so surprising, that Thomas lost another person working for him? It's basically a constant, considering people keep being laid off, disappearing or not getting paid enough. By now, you would think this man learned something from the past but hey, it looks like I overestimated his intelligence.
What I find incredibly funny about this situation is not that Brei herself had to tell the truth to the public because Thomas, as always, refuses to be honest about anything. It's about this specific part of his post regarding Roleslaying with Roman:
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Oh my god, this is so bad it's hilarious.
So Thomas laid his last writer off, but apparently he wasn't clever enough to find a proper replacement before doing it and he openly admitted in a post, to his fans (including his investors) that he has no writer to replace Brei and will have to keep following/begging her to get more of the script, because there's no one else who can develop the story in her place.
Do I really have to explain why everything about this is so stupid? Do I? Okay, then:
Thomas was apparently very quick at firing Brei, but not quick enough in finding another writer before doing it. That's not how any competent person works: when I left my last job, my boss asked me to stay for a couple more days, just enough to get a replacement. But hey, I suppose "finding a replacement" and "not leaving a vacant position" were too complex, too difficult thoughts for Mr. Sanders.
Mr. Sanders showed his investors he's so disorganized and impulsive, he fired someone with no backup plan and, as a result, had to put the series on hold. One of the series people are paying him to produce. If I were still paying him, I would stop immediately after this: if you're this unprofessional, you don't deserve money.
After laying Brei off, Thomas still wants to reach her for details regarding the story. The same story he fired her from. If he was so desperate for more of her work, he should've found a way to keep her around, not laid her off, then waste more time trying to find a way to get more of her.
If I were Brei, I would ignore Thomas forever and refuse to write even one more word regarding Roleslaying. But I'm a cold, heartless person, so I don't count. Still hope Brei will have some self-respect and refuse to share her work for free just because he's begging.
Or, at least, I hope she will ask for pre-payments first.
Thomas thought it was a great idea to show how unprofessional and disorganized he is via Twitter post. And refused to say the whole truth too. And no one was in the room to tell him: "Hey, what if you get a replacement first, so at least you won't have to admit you are dropping a series because you have no writer left?".
That's so stupid it doesn't even make me mad. It simply goes all the way around and becomes pure genius.
It also (involuntarily?) reconfirms a thought I had long ago, when Joan left. When I watched the goodbye video, I expected Thomas and/or Joan to tell us: "Hey, Joan is leaving, but here is the person who will replace them!".
But nope, no introduction of a new writer, no update post. Literally nothing. Joan left and no one came in. Only vague mentions of other people and names, but mostly Thomas confirming he was the main SaSi writer.
Thomas. Who is not a writer - let alone a competent one.
That's so stupid it's hilarious.
So, since now Thomas got rid of his last writer, what will he do? Learn how to become one? Considering his lack of progress in general, I suppose not.
So what? Will he hire another one of his friends? Will he think he can do anything and write RwR himself? Or will he keep trying on SaSi, a series that is so difficult to handle and with so many stakes, that even a competent writer would have problems with?
The incompetence has just reached a new level and I can't wait to see how deeper we can go.
_____________
The spoilers for the next SaSi episode
Thanks to @t-slanders, who appeared out of nowhere and decided to feed us something more than the absolute nothing Thomas gave us for years, we know what the next SaSi episode will be about.
And look, it's a plot in which:
The main topic of discussion is Thomas and Nico's relationship
Roman is ready to push things further
Janus and Virgil are not
Virgil is hiding he's on Janus' side
Wow. Wow. That's what Thomas came up with, this is what he's working on for 4+ years and hasn't finished writing yet.
Now, I'm not saying he should've created another plot: that's the only possible plot he could've developed. The only one that made sense, considering how WTIT ended and what was hinted during the 5 year anniversary special.
Why am I so sure of that? Because those are the exact same plot points for the season 2 finale - part 1 I came up with: in my version, Thomas was questioning if he was ready to have a relationship with Nico, Roman wanted to push things further, Janus wanted Thomas to be more cautious, Virgil was siding with Janus but refused to admit it.
Sure, some elements are different of course, but the plot points are the same. The biggest difference is that it took me a few months to develop them into a plot, not 4+ years.
And since those are the plot points, I already know how they will develop too. And not because I'm a genius but, again, they can only go in one direction: Thomas will eventually agree with Janus, it will become obvious Virgil is siding with him, Roman will feel betrayed and his arc will start in the next parts. It's already all written here, it can only go this way. The time travel idea is an "embellishment", but the plot can only go one way.
However, that doesn't mean the season finale will be automatically bad. A lot of stories I can predict end up being great anyway. So no, I won't judge it for its predictability. I will judge it for the production time and the characters' personalities.
And speaking of personalities...
_____________
The tweet video
I watched it at 2x speed, because didn't want to waste too much time on it.
It was... okay. Just okay. The characters' personalities are just okay. Everything is just okay.
Sigh. I'm tired of everything being "just okay".
And no, I cannot shake the feeling that Thomas pulled out this video in 0.2 seconds, only because he had a sponsorship to do.
One last thing I want to tell now, so consider it a warning: if the next episode and/or eventual season finale part 1 are "just okay", I will consider it negatively. From a canonical episode, I expect more than to feel "meh" while watching it.
_____________
And now?
We do the same thing we do every night, my dears: we wait forever for Mr. Sanders to finally decide to update us, to work on SaSi, or to do some stupid shit worthy of a discussion.
Of course, that doesn't mean we should burn him at the stake or cancel SaSi: we are all adults here, so we will simply highlight the shit Thomas does, because if you do stupid shit, you deserve to be criticized. That's not a personal attack, that's just being objective. I hope, one day, he will learn that too.
And maybe, who knows? He will also learn from his mistakes, hire someone competent, pay them properly and not lay them off without finding a replacement first.
Or, maybe, he will just find the perfect excuse to drop SaSi/put the finale on hold forever, so he will be finally free from the burden he clearly feels. When that day comes, I wish him to find a series he will be truly passionate enough, to keep it on until the end.
And sure, of course I will be around when the supposed next episode will supposedly come out: one part of me hopes it will be good, while the other part loves shooting a fish in a barrel. So... well, at least I will be satisfied either way ;P
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the-blossica-fan · 2 days
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Blossica and A Nightmare At Green Lake
An analysis made by THE Blossica fan
Why do I love Blossica? Why is it so important for A Nightmare At Green Lake? Would the story be the same without it?
In this long rant I call "Analysis", I will tell you my thoughts, the reasons and MY opinion on this ship and its importance to the entire event.
It can not be yours, and I'll gladly listen to your thoughts and reasons, but here's why it is so important and the story wouldn't be the same without it.
It has been edited, there might be some more changes if I see any inconsistencies.
Let's start by what most people call this ship, Childhood friends to lovers. I've seen a lot of people call it that, and while it's not wrong, it's also not right.
The better term Is "Childhood crush", as Blonney (Jennifer) is Jessica's childhood crush.
Must take into account that Blonney never knew of Jessica's existence, the OG Jessica was Blonney's imaginary friend, Changeling/Jessica just happened to hear it and thought it was Blonney giving her a name.
Why childhood crush? Well, it's pretty easy to know that Jessica's infatuation that persisted through the years is far more than just friendship. From things like reviving all the stories she told, retelling them and even exhausting them for everyone else.
It's also not a secret that she has probably been looking for someone to replace Blonney's space in her heart, which is why no one has ever seen as interesting in her eyes.
In Vertin's words "What happened to those people that accepted to stay with you? When you ran out of available games, they were no longer adored by you. I can stay longer than them, but with no exceptions. I'll become boring one day." These words are a hint to something.
No one can replace Blonney's place in Jessica's heart.
And, what about Blonney?
Blonney is definitely a lesbian, but this is no headcanon, in fact, I'd argue this is definitely canon. From design hints like those hair clips (this is Bluepoch, they pay heavy detail to their models, this is definitely not a coincidence), to even more hidden hints in her stories.
Since a child, Blonney has been writing in her diary stories, but you know what's interesting? Blonney describes the women as beautiful, like in the story about the dead bride.
A bride that looks for other happy brides? Mmm, doesn't it sound weird?
Blonney also describes Anne/Anna in extra detail, as if she had some sort of fixation with her. Let's remember that this description of characters is not only a script, but Blonney's own thoughts written on paper. When she criticizes herself, saying she'll pay for her doings one day, it feels crude and out of place because that is what she thinks about herself: That she'll pay for being a liar and mean (an arcanist and a lesbian)
The event itself also tells us enough for it to not be speculation, but absolutely straight up in your face.
Blonney's denial of her arcanist self (she punched Jason and yelled that she was not an arcanist, for those with internalized homophobia, this is a common reaction. Anger), the iconic couch scene and later on, her discussion with Jessica.
"How many times do I have to tell you how much I hate being called an arcanist", this is similar to a reaction I had before, denial and anger. In this case, and during the entire event, "arcanist" is used as an allegory.
For fuck's sake, Blonney was CUDDLING with Anne right BEFORE the iconic couch scene. Jessica/Anne is the one that made Blonney start to accept that side of herself, alongside with Tooth fairy's guidance; a professional lesbian.
"You seem to really like me. You would jump off a car to rescue me, you protect me, praise me. You would even be happy because I was happy." "Because I've never seen anyone as pretty as you are. You're special, you're different to the rest of us"
Oh God do you see that? This is flirting.
And while some might say Jessica doesn't know what romance and what liking romantically means, I'd argue otherwise.
Jessica does know what romance is
Let me tell you quickly. Jessica said in "The nightmare of green lake", she has met a couple of people who have different relationships with each other. She has even interacted with them, as in, she HAS talked to them. She has 6 people (excluding Michael, Jason and Freddy) in a cave, she knows some stuff.
When she says "I like you", she knows what she means. Her desperation to get Blonney to stay is not only because she doesn't want to be alone, but because she wants Blonney and ONLY Blonney to stay.
It's possible she's not sure she's in love, but she knows her feelings go far more deep than just a normal friendship. Plus, she has lived with Blonney's childhood stories, and those horror stories do have romance (The pathetic bride includes romance, Jessica is the one behind the pathetic bride, she knows). She's not oblivious nor stupid, she's just inexperienced. She knows she likes Blonney more than a common friend (based on how she treats others), and I think she would never like anyone that's not Blonney.
And what about their relationship?
People think they're master and pet, owner and pet, and I don't think they realize how deep that goes. Blonney is definitely in need of a person like Jessica, who fully supports her and her unique ideas. Jessica loves Blonney unconditionally, there's no reason to not think so. Their relationship is perfectly healthy, Jessica loves being adored and treated as a pet by Blonney, and Blonney is happy to see her happy.
That line of dialogue about a collar, despite how sexual it might be, is made out of innocence. They're not just master and pet, they're girlfriends and, don't we all have weird relationships with each other? They're happy, they're good for each other and are what the other needs.
So... What's their importance to the event? Are they really that important?
Yes.
The event wouldn't exist without that crush and romance. If Jessica didn't think romantically of Blonney, the event would be different, she wouldn't try hard enough to just keep Blonney and much less plan to get rid of everyone around Blonney so it's just the two of them.
If Blonney wasn't in denial of her homosexuality (and arcanum?), the event wouldn't be about accepting yourself as you are, it wouldn't be a story about coming out and the morals wouldn't be as impactful.
It would be a lackluster event.
Their relationship with each other is of heavy importance because it's that crush and denial that make up the entire story. The horror is just a side dish, the murderer and all of it, because this is not a horror story.
It's a love story
"I don't care whether my parents allow it or not!"
"I will quickly reveal this true look of mine, and everyone will look at me as if I've done something wrong"
Huh? Are we still talking about arcanists?
These lines are out of place for a 'friendship', or a discussion about staying or not. This is romantic, and especially in the homosexual way.
This true "look" of mine, doesn't it mean love? People do look at same-sex couples as if they've done something wrong, and while Jessica is talking about her changing abilities, we all knows this is about her crush on Blonney and how society would look at her wrongly.
Because, if she truly didn't know about her crush on Blonney which is the basic of all; everyone knows about crushes and romance, then how would she know people would look at her wrongly?
"I don't care whether my parents allow this or not"? Is a line said in ROMANCE. All romance stories with a 'secret romance' have this sort of line, whether straight or gay, this is a basic must-have in this sort of relationships.
She's not only talking about Jessica's changing abilities and arcanum, she's talking about her own blossoming love.
Especially when Jessica asks if Blonney liked her story, she's seeking approval and a hint Blonney will stay by her side, this is a confession. Which is why she gets so down when she gets a "yes, I like it very much". That's not a yes, it's a dismissal, a 'not so important' thing. This is a rejection of her feelings, even if on accident.
And, why does Vertin intervene? Why does she have the talk to Jessica about staying?
Because Vertin more than anyone knows what it's like to let go of a lover, she knows about not being able to confess in time and she knows that if she doesn't intervene, this will be like her and Schneider all over again. Regrets. She's being supportive, she's trying to do what she couldn't do. She's playing cupid.
A place where no one would judge Jessica for her looks, also known as the homosexual suitcase. We all know that no one in Reverse is straight, or at least, 99% aren't. We all know no one would bat an eye if a deer girl was kissing an 80's horror movie girl in the middle of the wilderness.
This is the perfect place for both, Blonney and Jessica, a place where they can be together while not being judged.
And what about Horropedia, Sonetto and Tooth Fairy? What part do they play in this Horror story?
Oh, they're very important as well. In fact, all of them are.
Horropedia, despite interrupting the girls RIGHT BEFORE KISSING, is the reason they're there. Without him, this would be a psychological horror story. And Blonney and him are the wlw and mlm hostility, they're so hating on each other but they do care. Sonetto has helped Blonney in silent ways, not only by helping her become more herself and supporting her fully, something she needed, but she's also an example of someone who's tied down. They've become good friends because they both used to be in similar situations mentally and emotionally.
But out of the two, Tooth Fairy is definitely the most important. She has gone through the same experiences as Blonney. Arcanist living in human society and a lesbian. She knows what Blonney is going through so she's helping, in her own way. She's the one who makes Blonney start to accept herself, to accept the fact that she is the only one Jessica wants and the one who understands her the most. Blonney softens because of both, Jessica and Tooth Fairy.
Tooth Fairy was the key to Blonney's acceptance, and it's because of her talk to Tooth Fairy that Blonney treats Anne better, that she's willing to share more of herself, that she's more physical. It's not a coincidence that after slowly accepting the fact she's an arcanist (lesbian) that she gets more flirty and physical with Anne/Jessica.
This entire event was a way to talk about coming out, and I've watched this event so many times I wrote this out of memory. It feels this way because it's INTENDED to be that way. It's real, it's crude. It's so direct because that's what it is.
A coming out story, a horror story
A love story
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lestappenforever · 2 days
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hey mona how are you feeling? how did the surgery go? <3
Hello, anon! You're so sweet for asking, and my apologies for the slightly delayed response here! Yesterday became a bit more stressful than I had hoped for. 😅
Putting this under a 'Read more' just so people who don't want to read about stuff like this can avoid it. TW: Mentions of blood.
I'm feeling pretty well! No pain or discomfort yet, so that's good. A little bit tired due to the blood loss and the overall stress of last night, but overall I'm feeling good.
The surgery itself went really well! It took a bit longer than anticipated as the surgery was performed by a surgeon in training, so there was a lot of consulting with the attending surgeon and double checking everything that was being done. But, the surgeon in training, the attending surgeon and the nurse who was there to look after me were all so incredibly sweet! They talked me through everything they were doing, explained every step and what to expect, and they were so generous with the anesthesia that I didn't feel any pain or discomfort during the procedure itself. And the nurse did an amazing job at keeping me distracted while the surgeon was burning away the affected parts of my cervix.
Due to how I started bleeding immensely a few days after my biopsy in June, they gave me prescription for pills with tranexamic acid to stop bleeding from organs and advised me to start taking them after the surgery, which I did. They also put like 3 meters of gauze up there that I had to leave in for four hours.
But, when I removed the gauze as instructed four hours later, I started bleeding a lot. Much, much more than I did after my biopsy, and I was honestly pretty terrified. So I called the hospital, they told me to come back and I did, which was good because it turns out a blood vessel had ruptured that was causing the bleeding, and it wouldn't have stopped on its own. (And the pills can't stop bleeding from a ruptured blood vessel.)
The sweetest gynecologist checked me out and discovered the ruptured blood vessel, and put in two stitches to close it. That bleeding stopped right away when he did, and that was that. I'm not gonna lie, that was quite painful at times, but it was also necessary. So I'm very happy that I called the hospital and was asked to come in, and now I feel completely fine!
And as stressful and scary as yesterday ended up being, it's a million times better than not doing any of it at all. I'd get a thousand stitches and go through a hundred procedures to remove parts of my cervix as long as that results in a seriously reduced risk of at some point developing ovarian cancer.
So moral of the story: Don't skip your Pap smears, take your health seriously, and listen to your body when it's telling you something is wrong because, most likely, you'll be right. Don't fuck around and find out with your health, please. ❤️
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