#( ... i am..full of apologies )

[isjasz]

[Day 163]

Will the pattern continue?

Everyone you have clo @clopiya to blame 💥💥💥💥💥💥💥💥💥

[akirathedramaqueen]

Do you think this is the moment he fell in love?

Okie, it's time to shitpost speculate a bit on my favorite moment in the whole show: the end of the Truth Seekers episode.

Do you think this was the first time Blitzø was protected? Taken care of? Saved?

Just look at how in awe he is, eyes wide open, jaw dropped. I doubt we've ever seen a face like this before or after. Of course, it might also have something to do with seeing Stolas in his true form for the first time. It was eerie and terrifying, but also sublime and exalting. Oddly attractive even, maybe?

This owl demon, with eldritch ancient powers and two dozen legions, was there just for him. Stopped in his tracks of whatever royal deeds he was attending to and came to stand up for Blitzø, to scare the shit out of his... well, fuckbuddy's (or not really?) perpetrators. Stolas watched after him, knew he was in trouble! So he... cared?

I am going to repeat my starting statement - he is not used to being worried about. Here, Moxxie clearly prioritizes Millie (no blame here, it's completely valid!), and helps Blitzø to get up only after the latter sarcastically sneered, "Oh, yeah, thanks, I am fine!"

And Loona, at least until the Queen Bee episode, which happens later, was very hesitant to show even a grain of affection toward Blitzø. We know she cares, but it's not always enough to just have it in mind and not demonstrate it.

And here is Stolas, caressing Blitzø, asking if he is alright, calling him 'darling' - another first in their relationship, at least on screen. Look how confused he is for a moment; he looks away and up (defensive? scared? annoyed?) - has he ever been asked things like that before? Notice how his face relaxes after Stolas strokes his forehead. Our guy is tough, no doubt, but I bet he just realized how nice it is when there's someone who cares.

Hell knows, these five seconds are a single thread holding my mental health together after the shitshow in the Full Moon and Apology Tour episodes.

Of course, there's the second part where Stolas tones down the grandiosity of his gesture. He scolds the crew for not being careful and jeopardizing him along with them, implying that the book exchange should remain a secret. Then he negates it himself - luckily for them, demon-obsessed lunatics are not taken seriously in the human world.

I don't think this changes anything. The first thing he did was to ask if Blitzø is okay. Only after he was reassured Blitzø is fine did he begin to rant, and even then his concern addressed both the crew letting themselves into trouble and his own safety. Again, why wouldn't it be valid? However I look at it, I don't think the book is his primary interest here.

And is this the first time we see Blitzø blushing?

This blush! I bet my life that Mister Blitzø 'boring-as-fuck-monogamy' Buckzo hasn't even internalized it yet, but oh, did his heart just do a big somersault.

Listen to my voice: This is the moment he fell, even though he didn't know it himself yet. Poor boy has a lot of work to do to unlearn his coping mechanisms and let his walls down.

Thank you for coming to my sappy stand-up, don't forget your coats on your way out. *drops mic*

P.S. Oh, I lied to you. There's a bonus "Blitzø just fell so hard" face in the Seeing Stars episode, haha. Apparently Stolas's human form is just as hot as his true demonic one lol.

[sukunasdirtylaugh]

fwb toji who is furious when you come home (you let him crash at your place) telling him with a broad smile that the mechanic was kind enough to give you premium air on your tires "for only $120 for all four tires!" and he's fuming, already on his feet, "no no sweetheart," he tells you, "they scammed you. why didn't you call me in the first place?" and suddenly you're shy, giving him a shrug that nearly wounds him if it weren't for the hard thumping of his heart. "give me your keys, baby. I'm gonna take care of it."

[egophiliac]

ch 5 is coming in twsten ch5 is coming in twsten ch5 is coming in twsten (we gon die it's been a YEAR since I saw some clips and I have not emotionally recovered from the incredible deliveries by Silver's seiyuu because holy fuck) EGOOOOO ARE YOU READY TO SEE EVERYONE DESCENDING INTO MADNESS AGAIN (and a pool of tears??? MINE SPECIFICALLY)

YESSSSSS I AM SO EXCITED FOR EVERYONE ON ENG, chapter 5 is some of the most PEAK Diafamily content imo. 🤌 it's definitely my favorite part of episode 7 so far! (though 6 is pretty close...)

some (mostly) non-spoilery advice: on the hex maps, check out the non-required story cells, especially in the later parts! some are basically just throwaways, but there's some real good scenes hidden in there too that are potentially missable. 🥄 (it shows which cells you've cleared on previous attempts, so if you're low on resources and/or super impatient like me, do just the required ones to get through it, then when you're ready go back and restart as necessary to get to the others. enjoy! >:)

[turtleblogatlast]

Something I’ve been thinking about lately is that small moment in “Air Turtle” where immediately after the Daves lose yet another game, Leo says how sorry he is and how he’s doing his best as the mascot. This moment is so short but it’s honestly jam-packed with a whole heap of characterization.

His need to apologize for things clearly not his fault - especially when it feels like he messes up the job he was given despite doing the best he can (the phrase “it’s not about you” takes a new meaning when this is one of the lessons to be learned from that - that he is not always solely responsible for things going wrong), his need to save face and make a connection with an older adult man in his life (something he consistently does throughout the series - he’s got a few daddy issues, always collecting potential father figures, it’s no wonder he jumps at the bit to keep rapport), and the way he sounds and looks and the words he chooses really pushes how he is just a kid (“Mr. the Dunk, I’m so sorry”).

Like I know it’s a one off moment that doesn’t truly mean much, but when put against the rest of the series it works really well with the rest of Leo’s established character and helps in solidifying later concepts as well.

[anonymouscheeses]

I cant wait for the fanart, my LESBIAN tt moots are already frothing at the mouth at them 😭

And if theres not 100 in the week. I'll make my own.

[gomzdrawfr]

look at this dumb thing I drew

[stop-breaking-my-heart-telltale]

I think for all the discussions we have of "everyone hears the jokes and the piano; after that, they stop listening" surrounding Louis, we tend to still simplify his connection to the piano.

Yes, it's very cute that he sings Clementine a little song when they first meet, and it's very cute that he plays a little prank on her while "tuning" the piano. It's super cute that they carve their initials into the piano and Clementine carves a heart around them. It's mega cute that he names his song he wrote after her when she confesses her feelings. Louis playing Don't Be Afraid at the party is, in my opinion, one of the best moments in all of TFS.

But here's the thing: That piano is Louis' heart.

I don't mean to go all metaphorical on you, but I'm dead serious—the piano is Louis' heart, and when you think about his arc and his romance route with that in mind...?

That piano is his one comfort in a world where the dead walk. It's been with him from the beginning of the outbreak. We know from his backstory that Louis wanted to take singing lessons so he could be a real musician, and his father denying him of that was what set him off to be a "vindictive fuckhead." Louis never got those singing lessons, and it's a very real possibility that Louis taught himself how to play.

Sure, others could've taught him; we know Minerva was musically talented, perhaps she showed him a thing or two. But learning piano, or any instrument, is brutal even with professional guidance. It takes hours of practice until numbness wears fingertips raw; dedication to memorize every key and finger placement to make music pleasing to the ear; self-discipline to keep going through every fumble, every failure, every single cruel thought of self-doubt; intelligence and a creative ear to write his own songs.

And yet, it's severely under-appreciated by everyone. It's annoying. It's distracting. It's unimportant. It's an excuse for Louis to mess around and not do any real work. He doesn't have any actual talent. The music and the piano are brushed off, unheard.

Yet, Louis keeps playing. He keeps singing. He keeps making jokes.

Creating music, the one thing he wanted so badly as a kid that he destroyed his parents marriage, was possibly the greatest comfort he had... a welcome distraction to disassociate from the horror and death happening around him.

It's bittersweet, like a purpling bruise that you can't stop pressing on; it hurts, but there's something else below the pain. The piano is out of tune and it's something that brings him joy... but will always act as a constant reminder of who he was and what he did, why he's at Ericson to begin with.

We first meet him while he's playing; Louis' heart is exposed, but is it really? Is he playing to his true potential? Louis hides behind the mask of a charming, charismatic goof. It's what is expected of him, so he plays a silly song intended to poke and prod at Clementine, to gauge a reaction. That's something we see him do at multiple points in episode one. In fact, we can consider a majority of episode one to be like the song he's playing when we meet him; it's mostly cheery or fast-paced.

Louis is able to soothe AJ with his "alluring" music after the kid bit Ruby is an indication that the two of them will share a bond. Louis is a natural at communicating and bonding with the younger kids [another talent that's overlooked] so it's interesting that he praises AJ for being a natural at piano, as well.

But the song stutters just a bit when Louis and Clementine are in the woods together, though; "There's only one guarantee: this moment. That's the only you got, only thing any of us got. Might as well enjoy it." ...Only for Louis to compose himself and send her away.

It's only when Clementine has a gun in her face, held by Marlon, that the music isn't fun anymore; it's rainfall and thunder and the words "I thought you were more than that" sung through the wind in a melody only Louis can hear.

Then Marlon's dead. The song is over, and reality has arrived.

I've talked at length about Louis in ep2 and his vote in the past. It's one of the most compelling things about Louis' arc and romantic route. It's a tragic mistake driven by trauma and guilt. It's people simultaneously telling him to shut up and telling him to be angrier than he is. Telling him to stop burying his head in the sand when he's never been more aware of everything happening. It's AJ peering up at him with pleading eyes that Louis can't stand to look at. It's Clementine wrapping his heartstrings around her fingers and tugging just enough to hurt, but not break.

Louis missed Clementine. He says as much when Clementine admits she missed him first. I don't even know where to begin with that! I can think of no other way to describe it other than they are half agony, half hope over this... and if you get that reference, you get a gold star. I just- the ache, the tension, the conflicting feelings of finally having a quiet moment to talk but Louis not being ready yet.

Y'know how someone carved "you suck at playing" in the side of the piano? It's something you might not initially notice while playing the game, just as Louis' insecurities aren't apparent at first.. but they're carved in him; never fully healed, still scabbed and bleeding... Until Clementine offers him a bandage.

She won't clean the wound for him, but she'll be there. She'll help him figure out how to do it himself so he can heal. She'll listen to him, not belittle his feelings or pain. She'll make an effort to know his keys and notes and practice playing his song until she understands.

When Clementine chooses him to spend time with him, it's a mirror of their first time meeting... but this time, Louis plays something real: a song he wrote, one that I believe he crafted during the two week time skip... a song he wrote with Clementine on his mind, for better or worse.

If the piano is Louis' heart, he literally asks her to sit there and try to tune it, which ends up being a joke but I say she's already tuned your heart, my guy. It's there before them, changed in the warm candlelight. He plays for her and opens up about how no one actually listens, but Clementine did.

And remember, this is the night of the raid. They don't know it's coming, but they know it'll be soon. Louis understands that he could very well die, so what does he do? He carves his initial into the one thing he's always had, and he asks Clementine to do the same.

I'm sorry, how are we NOT more feral about this? Prior to this scene, the only thing we see carved into the piano, into Louis' heart, is an insult. This thing that Louis cares so deeply about, this instrument that's become so intertwined with who he is... he wants to leave his mark on it just in case he dies. A reminder that it was his and he belonged to it just as much. Something so important, and he asks Clementine to carve herself into his heart where no matter what, they will be immortalized together in this moment.

And when Clementine carves a heart around their initials? Yes, his reaction is very cute and that's great... but she's not ashamed of him, or her feelings for him. She wants everyone who looks upon his heart to know that. She tells him how she feels and Louis is so giddy, and warm, and he names the song after her and I am going to start biting anything that moves, I can't-

Oh, and let's discuss the party scene in episode three, shall we? Y'know, where the heart covered initials are on full display? Where Louis tells the story of why he was sent to Ericson to everyone?

Louis is so... vulnerable. Sincere. Ashamed of what he did. This is the exposed nerve, the one he was so afraid of showing Clementine but there it is... and she doesn't reject him. Sure, she can say it's fucked up if you choose to, but she doesn't break up with him over it.

Also the fact that everyone sitting around him finally listens when he's at his most unshielded only for Tenn to ask him to play Don't Be Afraid for them after...? How do you not see the connection? Are you trying to make me cry? In that moment, Louis' heart was heard and appreciated and beautiful and strong and-

Listen. I am fine. I'm so normal about this. And fine. I'm fine.

But I also have to add that during the walk in episode four, if you let Louis choose what to add to the imaginary house, he picks a brand new piano because he wants a new heart to reflect the confidence and growth Clementine helped him achieve and because he loves her and AJ so much that wants the new heart to not just be his but also theirs and I am so fine with this, okay.

[penelopesbridgerton]

Beril Pozam & Taro Emir Tekin Yalı Çapkını | 44. Bölüm

[kidvoodoo]

He never should have gotten lost

Truthfully, it was not Bojan’s fault. The caravan was hurried across the icy roads in fear of the approaching blizzard, the mounted guards pushing the desperate people and stock animals alike. It wouldn’t matter, they were doomed across the Käsivarsi, it was always too treacherous for a band of inexperienced Traders. The panic and hurried chaos found some of the wagons sliding and the animals pulling them spooked and scattered. The guards shouted for the rest to grab the horses lest they be lost in the wilderness.

And so he found himself here, lost in the frigid woods following hoof prints that disappeared under the freshly falling snow.

Bojan shivered as he moved silently as possible through the trees, afraid to whistle for the missing animals lest he attract unwanted attention…

“Susia,” the gruff voice of a bearded hunter warned, they had stopped briefly in a village overlooking the Kilpisjärvi. “Wolf packs. They travel together, hunting animals like your horses. Will kill you in your sleep, they stay away from fires. Sleep in shifts.” The guards took any advice from the locals, trusting their knowledge of the wilds.

“And boy,” the hunter addressed Bojan who startled at the sudden attention. “You watch for Väki. He hunts for people like you. Foolish people.”

The guards all snickered at that, Bojan huffed and pulled his coat tighter, stomping out of the hunter’s shack.

Foolish indeed, he scowled as his fingers and toes froze. He could find the road again, to hell with the horses-

BAM

Something slams into his back, throwing him face first into the snow. For a brief and panicked moment he thought one of the horses had charged him, the force was so strong it knocked the wind from his lungs, but as he scrambled to crawl away, he heard a deep growl.

Wolves

In his panicked state he let out a yell and felt a powerful grip grab at his shirt collar, wrenching him onto his back.

Oh God it’s gonna tear my throat out-

The cold press of metal against his windpipe startles his screwed shut eyes open.

Green.

Bright, glowing, inhuman green irises bore into his hysterical brown ones. A deep snarl, like a wolf erupts from human lips. Human?

No, not this creature.

His skin is a pale greyish-blue and his ears are pointed and curved, he’s shirtless save for a thick cloak of pelt’s around his neck and shoulders, strong and powerful looking arms level a curved and pockmarked knife to Bojan’s throat. The creature’s other arm is raised, his hand not flesh and blood but a twisted claw of tree roots and bark, fingertips hooked and wickedly sharp. His expression is pulled into a fierce glare, dark brows furrowed over even darker eyes that hold two glowing orbs at their center, a hypnotic and terrifying stare meant to shatter the bravery of any foolish man who strays from the path…

Just like Bojan did.

“P-please-“ Bojan stutters, grasping his barely-there knowledge of the Finnic language to attempt to communicate. “I am sorry, I didn’t mean to trespass-“

“Caravan.” The creature growls back, Bojan spots sharp, canine-like teeth behind his scowl.

“Yes! Yes I am with the Caravan on the road, we only need to find our horses-“

“Horses gone.” The strange being spits, slowly pulling the long knife away from Bojan’s throat. “They run far out in the forest, wolves will chase them down” He moves to stand back, not letting his guard down or stowing his weapon. “You not find them in time.”

Bojan slowly pulls himself up out of the snow, his back now soaked with melted snow and making his breath catch from the cold.

“Y-yes. You are probably right, I will go back to my people, I-I’m so sorry I disturbed your territory-“

“Not mine.” The creature says, Bojan sees now that he’s actually taller than the creature, but it doesn’t make him any less intimidated.

“You die before finding horses, too cold for your kind.” The stranger huffs and sheds his wolf pelt cloak, handing it to the shaken human. “Take. I find your horses”

Bojan looks dumbfounded, shivering hands grasping the cloak.

“But-“

“I bring them when your people asleep. You tell no one about.” The being glares, his burning eyes piercing through Bojan. He raises his twisted root hand and curls his fingers open, Bojan swivels around to the sound of cracking wood and stares in awe as the forest’s dense trees bend open to reveal a path.

“Follow, your people not too far away.”

Bojan shakes himself out of his gawking to turn and thank the creature-

But he’s gone.

His gaze darts around for any signs of the strange being, but not even footprints are left in the white blanket of snow. He is pulled out of his shock by a harsh shivering of his frozen body, quickly pulling the thick coat of furs around himself.

Warmth.

It’s unnaturally warm. Smelling of thick pine and iron and something undefinably sweet. He burrows into it further.

As he goes to follow the path in the parted trees, he spares one more glance behind him, a small smile on his face.

“Thank you” he whispers to the empty air.

<><><>

I’ve been reading all about Finnish folklore lately and what better way to express my excitement than to make an au no one asked for :D

[certifiedbi]

To my non-superbike people of motogpblr, I hope this showcases the significance of the TDOL photo

[koifsssh]

the chimera.

[akirathedramaqueen]

Only one person has the power to make Stolas cry

And I'll keep the intrigue just a little bit longer so you can try to guess for yourself and experience the kind of satisfaction I had once I pieced it all together. And, oh boy, did it click!

Okay, so today, after a rather passionate conversation with @tealvenetianmask about how fandom seems to perceive Stolas as overly emotional and soft demon, we started rummaging through all the scenes where Stolas actually cried. We were blown off by some revelations.

First note: it's actually not much. Our owl appears to be very sturdy and often bites back when attacked, rather than shutting down as one might expect.

Second note... Better let me show you. Let's walk through all the 'Stolas cries' scenes and see what is happening there, and answer the question, "What, or rather who, sets him off the rails?"

This is your last chance to place your bets and educated guesses. Because below are big clues, and, eventually, answer.

Circus

We follow up on Stolas shortly after the disastrous date at Ozzie's - arguably, a couple of hours later. He looks absolutely miserable. He has boozed himself to unconsciousness. His eyeliner is ruined from earlier tears. He groans, either from headache or emotional turmoil, grabs three Happy pills, and shoves them down his throat.

Whatever happened at this club ruined our bird, to the point he's looking for anything to avoid being alone with his thoughts.

Western Energy

One shed tear. That's all Stolas allows himself. That's what I am talking about when I claim he is actually very tough. He is being tortured, mutilated, and by this point, he has a pretty good understanding that his demise is likely inevitable.

And you know what he does in response? He talks back. He cuts through Striker's bullshit about royals taking everything from him and points out that his killer took a contract from a royal. He literally humiliates Striker with sex jokes and mocks his oversized dick on the statue ego. Figuratively, he spits death in its face.

The Full Moon

Stolas is destroyed.

This meeting was nerve-wracking even before it happened - all the preparation, insecurities, misunderstandings of the past, and lingering, terrifying questions (He loves me? He loves me not?).

It takes weeks to set everything in motion. He planned it meticulously. He scripted every word, every movement of his body, every subtle tone in his voice.

But he forgot that there was another party in this play. The party who was not given the script and is burdened with his own trauma. One shitty assumption, one poorly-thought-out action, and here it is - mockery, avoidance, a fight... and tears. His first meltdown he wasn't able to conceal.

His worst nighmares came true, or so he convinced himself. He loves me not.

Apology Tour

Our last stop on our 'we-love-being-tortured-by-crying-Stolas' tour is here.

The wound is still fresh, bleeding even, and here he comes, rubbing salt into it. Someone Stolas still desperately wants. Someone who was infinitely brash, rude, and aggressive just this morning. Someone who doubled down on statements that made Stolas believe this particular someone hates him.

That someone tries to talk. To explain. To apologize. Wonders how Stolas could actually care about him. Says the prince is better off without him.

Fuck... The prince came here to forget, to wipe that someone (okay, it's getting increasingly hard to pretend it's not obvious yet) from his memory, at least for the night, and he still won't let Stolas go.

He breaks into tears, crushed, reassured he can't have anyone who would hold him, who would say he is the only one, but recuperates shortly after - he was taught better than this.

Okay, are we ready for the shocker of the year?

It's Blitzø.

It was his date with Blitzø at Ozzie's, where he was ignored, humiliated, and was told that their relatioship was only about sex, and that he was the one who made it clear.

It was Blitzø turning down (or so he thought) his distress call, leading him to believe he was left alone to die.

It was Blitzø mocking his confession and assuming it was just a fucking roleplay.

Finally, it was Blitzø haunting him since that very morning and, albeit with better intentions, still hurting him beyond his abilities to recover.

The only person who tore his soul apart enough to break his inpenetrable mask - built up by decades of gritted teeth, restraint, and bravery - was the one he probably cares about the most.

It was not Octavia, whom he holds close to his heart but couldn’t allow to see him depressed. He had to be strong for her; he needed to raise and support her.

It was not Stella, whom he endured for years, yet did not satisfy her wish to see him whimper. He talked back, argued, ignored, and seethed. But he never gave in.

It was him. An imp who stole his grimoire and gave him the best time of his life, however sad that may sound.

Now, thanks for joining this drama in four acts. You may pull out your handkerchiefs and ugly cry right here, in your places. Don't hold it in.

Because I don't.

[mothinabottle]

Imagine. Imagine a new ritual in-game where the temple tries to convert a demon PC back to a normal human again. Like some type of shit involving a high rank temple member cumming inside PC 7 times (Because 7 is the holy number supposedly? Jajsjajsja)—Preferably Jordan

Spoiler: It doesn't fucking work. This is just an excuse to have porn with plot, ok??? I am at my wit's end cuz I haven't been able to draw Jordan in a GOOD while and I just need them???

I NEED YURI SEX, YAOI SEX, WHATEVER THE FUCK IS AVAILABLE WITH JORDAN 😭

[warblogs17282]

i am going insane waiting for apology tour

just had this weird ass lucid dream that apology tour came out, I understand that it could possibly be out this weekend but I may be going mentally insane and I need help asap, it's worth it tho, so yea imagine my disappointment when I woke up this morning

[turtleblogatlast]

Every time I see trans Leo I smile. Like yes that turtle is trans thank you…