#( look it's u guys' problematic fave )

[justaboutsnapped]

tbh we need to start holding all drivers responsible for the shit they say, not just the ones we don't like (looking at you people who conveniently categorise nico h./checo as the Problematic Ones™ in order to ignore sexist/otherwise bigoted comments made by other drivers)

f1 is unfortunately an Ultra Male Big Oil Sport currently and if we start cancelling outright we'd have no one fucking left lmao. the bar is soooo fucking low u guys. your faves are not exempt actually. it's possible to simultaneous be a fan and be critical!!! have some self-respect!! have some integrity!!!

[easy-revenge]

we need more on the easy revenge and how himeno plays a role in aki’s development please i love her <3 give me the meta i love u thank u

the way y'all are enabling me to be insufferable on main? i love it. its me and my problematic fave against the world. buckle up.

honestly i cant believe i havent talked about easy revenge on here? its my favorite part from himeno's arc and one of my favs for aki as well. so... essay incoming.

gonna start a bit from further back and make some himeno haters mad right off the bat. himeno, in my humble (and correct) opinion, was the person who knew aki better than anyone else. and it has very little to do with how long they knew each other.

himeno knew. she knew that aki wouldn't make it. she knew since before we, as an audience, started observing this story. she knew the harsh but very realistic truth was that aki ultimately was just some guy, and i say that with the unimaginable love i have for him.

he was never special enough. he was never talented enough, strong enough and against popular belief, never driven enough either to kill the gun devil. he gave away his lifespan, he put his life on the line for others every day. he offered to use his sword to save denji, whom he allegedly despised at the time. that's not the behavior of someone who lives for a singular, selfish purpose.

himeno saw him and knew. she knew that if aki was to stand against the gun devil with a sword in hand, he wouldn't make it out alive. she saw him and knew that there were other things he wanted as well.

she was also selfish about it. she wanted him alive and close to her. she wanted them to leave public safety together. she wanted to cup her hands around the dancing little flame that was his shriveling life span and protect it with her life. but selfishness aside, she knew that ultimately it would be the best case scenario for aki as well.

she was proven right. multiple times. after her death. aki admitted to not looking at himself objectively shortly after he lost her, bc he wouldn't have been able to go on otherwise. aki had always been trapped. he'd been set up to fail by the narrative and by makima all along. and even though that was something himeno couldn't know, she was proven correct again when aki died before even getting to look at the gun devil and have a chance to go down fighting.

himeno never told aki that she didn't believe in him. it wasn't something he'd ever be ready to hear, especially while she was still alive. aki wouldn't be able to live without a goal to strive for. he'd clutched at that pipe dream and held on for dear life for too long, gave up too much on his way there. he didn't know how to exist without a finish line to run towards.

but himeno saw him stick gum to a woman's coat for her. she saw him being happy about it. she saw him taking care of power and denji, even though he was aki hayakawa, the devil hunter who hated devils the most. she saw him stare longingly at makima. she felt his breath against her own face as they shared cigarettes.

it rly isnt that hard to see, if u care enough to look. and himeno cared more than enough. aki thought he wanted revenge. it takes a lot of hate in a man's soul to dedicate his life to that. aki was kind. aki cried for his co-workers' deaths. aki wanted to be the big brother he never got to be. he wanted the family he lost. he wanted to save people from things similar to what he went through.

aki deserved to lead a life where his kindness wouldn't put him at a disadvantage.

and that's what himeno wanted for him. even if it wasn't a life he would live by her side, she wanted him to be fulfilled. with her dying breath, she herself left him with a wish he could make come true.

later she'd leave him with a wish he'd at least try to.

easy revenge. small victories. moments of fulfillment. she probably put that cigarette upside down in the packet she died with, for good luck. it's such an honest wish. such a caring one. maybe something himeno would've lived by too if she didn't find her brief fulfilment in addiction.

it seems utterly pointless now. bc aki did die in the hands of the gun devil. he didn't get to protect denji and power. he didn't get to protect angel either. he failed in every way a man can fail bc he didn't escape the narrative. would never have been able to.

personally though, i dont think he would've gotten as close as he did to taking something back if it wasn't for that cigarette. if it wasn't for the remnants of himeno, the mere essence of her having the power to give it to him before dying alongside ghost.

bc he did get a family. he got to be an older brother again. he gave two months he couldn't really spare to save a devil. took the same devil out to eat with him.

he ASKED to leave the gun devil mission to protect his family. to not lose anyone else the way he lost himeno. to not see another loved one of his go in the little time he had left.

he did everything in his power to honor both of himeno's dying wishes. he cried for her when she died and got his easy revenge. at least as much of it as he could.

to me, himeno was vital to aki's development and storyline, both alive and in death. aki deserved a person to know him. to see him. and himeno wasn't perfect, but she was that for him, even if it took him a bit too long to fully realize.

[trashlie]

FP 217 (in which i scream from the rafters)

When I said I shan’t say anymore I meant in that post not tonight beCAUSE I WILL NOT SHUT UP TONIGHT. When was the last time I got a FP thoughts post out this fast?! Have I ever?! 

THERE WAS NO MORPHINE! THERE WAS NO MORPHINE!!!!!!!!!!!! IT WAS ALL SHINAE!!!!!!!!!!!! ALL THAT PEACE AND CALM IS BECAUSE SHE WAS THERE, BECAUSE HE WAS ABLE TO ALLOW HIMSELF TO LEAN ON HER BECAUSE SHE STAYED BY TO WATCH OVER HIM AND WAIT FOR HIM TO WAKE 

IT WAS ALL! BECAUSE! IT’S HER!!!!!!!!!!!

“I thought you didn’t like the silence?” “I don’t... But I like this silence”

I DON’T LIKE THE SILENCE BUT IT’S OKAY IF IT’S WITH YOU. 

“It’s been a while since I’ve felt peaceful like this...”

I’M AT PEACE BECAUSE YOU’RE HERE

I’M GONNA SCUTTLE UP A WALL YOU GUYS!!!!!!! AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH 

I was here going “okay u know what the morphine is probably making him calm but still surely the fact that Shinae is there is part of why he feels okay” AND IT TURNS OUT THAT’S NOT THAT FAR OFF AFTER ALL?! LISTEEEEEEEEENNNNNNNNNN WHAT DO I DO WITH THIS?! NOL? BLUSHING?! NOL?! 

Like okay there is a LOT to unpack in this episode and I SHOULD go to bed soon but I want to try to spit out as much as I can while it’s all raw and bouncing around in my head because it’s just going to rattle around if I try to go to sleep ANYWAY. 

I... have so many thoughts about this episode and I’m just like a crow sitting on a wall cawing AAAHHHHHHHHHHHH

Nol my boy. My guy. My dude. My problematic fave. You have just been awakened AAAHHHHHHHHH

NO BUT does this not tie in to what I was just yelling about - how Nol and Shinae exist in/are forged in these pockets of quiet, in these moments of still, they grow through the shadows outside of other peoples’ eyes. I once talked somewhere on here about how if you look at the Relationship Rectangle of Kousuke, Shinae, Nol, and Alyssa, Nol and Shinae are, arguably, the ones who share the most intimate/closest relationship - but they are also notably the ones who are are not seen. Meg was so surprised that Nol and Shinae were close enough that he had her number and tried calling her to find her at the black and white gala. Sure, of course, Nol and Meg aren’t close, how would she know. But we kind of saw a sense of this with Yui, too, who continually aligned Shinae towards Kousuke. Again, bias (and loathing lol) but the point still stands: nobody besides maybe Dieter lol are really quite aware of how important Shinae and Nol are to each other.

I mean, hell! Shinae didn’t realize it until she was left crying in the rain and Dieter woke her up to the fact that he had become a person Shinae loves, an actual, real friend. Nol sure didn’t seem to realize it, either, despite, yknow. gestures vaguely how everything went down lmao and even had to ask if she actually meant all the things she had said back there.

Nol and Shinae are the kind of relationship that just so naturally grows - at what point did she go from thinking him annoying to him being a friend? Even that isn’t so simple - she felt so much guilt when she saw him sitting outside after she went off on him during her lunch break and thought he’d sat out there the whole time feeling sad because she was mad lol like. IDK I love a really well-written, ever-growing relationship - when you can’t identify the moment a person goes from being a stranger, an acquaintance, a friend. Because that’s how it goes! And it just feels SO well-executed between them! 

The way Shinae took off running to go grab some stuff before she would go to the hospital, like she wanted to be ready immediately so she could be there. Shinae who HATES hospitals, who never liked them, who is reminded of her own worst experience in one, who just recently went through it again when her father was in the hospital, still rushing to go there because Nol is that important, because he means that much. 

Nol who was in a state of panic when he woke, clearly from his own awful past with the Hirahara Memorial (Yui) calming when he noticed Shinae. Nol who doesn’t like the silence, feeling comfortable and at peace, allowing himself to do something he’s never allowed himself before and leaning on a friend, feeling at peace for the first time in SUCH A LONG TIME. And feeling that way NOT because of morphine but because of WHO she is. Because she can bring him that calm, because she can bring him that peace

I’M GOING TO YELL FROM A ROOFTOP. 

THAT EPISODE THAT FLASHED BACK TO THE POOL FALL AND HOW NOL WAS WILLING TO STAY DOWN THERE AND NEVER COME BACK UP, BUT BECAUSE SHINAE WAS DOWN THERE, TOO, HE COULDN’T, HE HAD TO GET HER OUT. SHE SAVED HIS LIFE BY NEEDING HERS SAVED. ;A;

AND HERE, SHINAE (AIDED BY LIL BUDDY) AND HER FRIENDS FIND NOL WHEN HIS LIFE IS IN DANGER AND SHE’S THERE TO MAKE SURE HE WAKES UP, TOO. 

LISTEN WHAT AM I SUPPOSED TO DO WITH THAT HUH? HOW CAN I NOT? JUST? LOVE THEM AND LOVE WHO THEY ARE TO EACH OTHER?!

That moment of realization, that frustration on his face, THE BLUSH. /HE’S FIGURED IT OUT/. HE UNDERSTANDS WHY HE FELT SO CALM, SO PEACEFUL, WHY HE WAS SO AT EASE HAVING HER THERE. HE KNOWS. 

It is SO FUNNY that we were just musing about this - like how Shinae has been getting flustered all night, her heart galloping around, and here he is, too, just. Reveling. AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

SHINAE IS HIS COMFORT. ;A; I’m thinking yet again about how, when he found out he WASN’T at Hirahara Memorial, he turned his face into her more, like crawling closer in comfort. AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

There’s so many other things to talk about, too, but I had to get this out first okay, I HAD to! 

I know fandom hates Rand, but if you’re here reading this lol you know that I’m a sucker for grey morality and that Rand is a frustrating fascination of mine because he made this mess but so many people have to lie in it. But listen, I had some FEELINGS. The fact that Jayce said Rand would carry that Bible everywhere, that it was like his good luck charm - and tucked inside are photos and notes from Nessa, including a photo of Nol the day he was born. THAT SHIT  HURTS. I don’t know how to express this well without... idk I trust that anyone reading this knows me well enough lol to know that I don’t absolve anyone of their blame just because I can sympathize.

And I DO. I DO sympathize. I’ve been saying it’s clear that Nessa was his true love - whether she was someone he loved before his marriage (clearly an arrangement) to Yui or if it happened afterwards. He LOVED her and he loves Nol, too, but he’s a man that doesn’t know how to express his emotions (in fact he has constantly tried to get Nol to be more like him and shove away his feelings), who has a vindictive and virtually law-less wife who can and will do anything she can to hurt him. So on some level I GET IT. He couldn’t be open with his love and affection for Nol. I think a part of him wants to be. That’s why he was so angry and said those awful things when Nol pleaded guilty - Rand was doing everything in his power to help him, to protect him in the only way he was allowed to and it was ruined. When he said he should have shipped him off to boarding school it wasn’t that he regretted having to raise this kid - it was that he regretted not doing enough to get Nol out of Yui’s reach. It was that he was greedy enough to want to keep his child near, this reminder of someone he loved, even though he knew he could not be the father he deserved. 

And it sucks because look how things have turned out for Nol. Look at how much he has suffered, how much he’s been hurt. He’s so certain his father has no love for him, only shame. He’s so certain his father takes care of him out of obligation, not love.

But all these years, Rand has carried around a photo of newborn Nol. The child he and the woman he loved fathered together. 

AND IDK it cuts me. Especially the fact that like... this was clearly Rand’s only comfort. This was the only thing that he could privately hold on to that brought him comfort and he made the choice to pass it on to Nol. Did he hope that it would comfort his son as it had comforted him all these years? Did he hope that it might convey all the things he’s been unable to say, all the things he couldn’t express? Idk it hurts me okay. It just. Idk you can be a shit father in a shit situation and I’m still going to feel sad that his choices have landed so many blows and ramifications.

I want to see the photos! I want to see what else is in there! Are there more notes? Did she write sweet letters about baby Nol that he can read? ;~; So many pages fell out of it. Did she tuck them back in or did she take them when she left? WHERE IS SHE GOING? At first I thought lmao maybe she’s off to find a vending machine to present him a little treat as a “sorry this isn’t a cake but you deserve to celebrate your birthday” kind of deal but someone else suggested she’s going to find Rand. I guess if she took the memorabilia maybe that makes more sense? Idk idk I like my cheesy little vending machine idea though lmaoooooooo 

I also LMAO love him making a dumb pun because ONCE AGAIN it just brings back that Yeonggi very much is a part of who Nol is. Just because he played that part of himself up doesn’t mean that isn’t a very true part of him. It also means that all of this - the way he’s spoken to Shinae this evening, the way he’s treated her - all of it is very much sober. It’s just. Him. Not playing up his dark, edgy “would you like me still if u knew all the things i’d done” Nol lmao. Not upbeat pushed to the limits Yeonggi. This is the truest, most raw Nol we’ve seen and it’s beautiful. I worry he lol might try to put up his defenses as a result of his realization, but if we’ve learned one thing about Nol, it’s that he is ultimately unable to deny anything regarding Shinae lmao 

Something else I want to touch on really quickly is Kousuke and that flashback.  "I need you to keep him from harming himself." "It'll be safer for him to remain here with you."

I know on one level Rand is taking advantage of a moment to group with Yujing (and Shinae...?) in that he cannot have Kousuke (and Hansuke) there to overhear. He has pointedly asked for Shinae to come to the hospital, and not simply because she’s a friend. Whatever Rand and Yujin are working on, she is a part of. Kousuke and Hansuke cannot be a part of that. Also, taking care of both your bleeding-out son and your in-shock son is not an easy feat for anyone. I don't think he's like, brushing this off by any means, he knows Hansuke is good hands, but my question is: "I need you to keep him from harming himself" is this... a thing that has happened in the past? Is it in any way connected to the night that Nol was sent away? I'm trying to think if there's been any times where Kousuke has seemed like a danger to himself in that he could/would harm himself. Possibly drinking way too much would count. But it makes me wonder if there was ever a time that Kousuke, perhaps with no recollection of it, did anything that could bring himself harm?

Back in episode 96, Kousuke called over Hansuke, and Hansuke made a little comment that "FYI I'm not giving you any meds" and Kousuke remarked that none of his modes of relaxation have worked since his run in with Yujing. Also "What do you do to relax again?" "You already know." "Do you think maybe they have become too routine they don't work as well as they used to?"

I'm just spitballing here but seeing Kousuke just shut down like this, and how it seems very much like the time when Nol was taken away (asking Yui what happened) just makes me Wonder A Lot.

Like, Kousuke is presented to us as a character who is very much in control of himself, and has a tendency to try to control the world around his own personal narrative. But we have also been shown enough to know that's not entirely the case, and that Kousuke's sense of control is very much a sort of coping mechanism because his reality does not entirely align with actual reality. I want to know more about the meds. I want to know more about what happened that night. As Kousuke's characterization unravels, we're beginning to see that HE is more unraveled than he's appeared (which is just very much the general case of everyone in here lol)

I JUST FEEL LIKE THERE IS SO MUCH IN THIS EPISODE AND I’M SORRY BUT I CANNOT SHUT UP ABOUT THIS LITTLE NOL REVELATION quimchee is just. SHE IS FEEDING US. SHE’S GIVING ME EVERYTHING I WANTED 

Also last tidbits I want to point out:

Rand’s face just looks SO haunted. So tired. He just aged 20 years. Shiane’s imitation of him was uhhh.... pretty on the nose lol

Dieter’s little “some friends we are huh” comment really hurt. Like, Nol is an unstoppable force. Could they have made more of a fuss to make him stay and get checked over? Sure. Would it have changed anything, though? 

But also seeing the blood on his and Soushi’s hands.... wow that HURTS like. Fortunately we know Nol is okay (well. You know. As okay as he can be, all things considered) but still having to help your friend’s father gather your friend as he’s bleeding out all over you?! Isn’t that a little traumatic? Isn’t that HAUNTING? 

There’s also something so tender and sweet about Dieter being offered the option to go do whatever he needs to and still being concerned about Minhyuk and all the food ;~; He’s a good bean. I don’t know if there’s anything much to read into the whole “We’ll let Shinae go first” bit. Dieter is, yknow, aware of Nol and Shinae’s close bond, so possibly this is his way of giving her that space? I think it’s at any rate on the complicated side - Nol just. Leaves them and cuts off connection to all of them and then suddenly he’s at Minhyuk’s house and Dieter has to play mediator? SOUSHI DIDN’T EVEN KNOW HE WAS THERE. JUST. BOOM. NOL FALLING FROM THE FLOOR ABOVE AND COVERED IN GLASS.

AND THEN SUDDENLY HE’S HELPING GET HIM INTO THE CAR, COVERED IN HIS BLOOD.

Jesus. Everyone needs therapy ;~; 

Also my god Kousuke’s face. He looks haggard as hell. Assuming he saw photos of baby Nol in that Bible, it feels like it undoes everything he and Nol just confessed and said. That affectionate, loving version of Rand didn’t exist? But what does it mean if he carried around a picture of one of his baby sons? 

Did he have anything about Kousuke in there? Had he already removed anything about Kousuke? 

IDK THERE’S SO MANY FEELINGS YOU GUYS pls join me in my wailing and yelling ;A; 

[seth-burroughs]

benefits of being yomi kin:

makes me twice as cool and sexy and automatically makes me the objectively correct authority on Yomi's character it is impossible for me to be wrong and if u tell me im wrong ill start scream crying on the floor

won kin lottery and is capable of distinguishing between Yomi Hellsmile the character and Yomi Hellsmile The Character allowing me to both quite literally be that guy and keep another version of him as my blorbo. Manifesting in the ability of fantasizing bout yomi suffering iykwim AND getting past the masochist allegations <3 Also yeah the Yomi fic is currently in works no I will not answer questions on it

this yaoihellsmile shit is sooo easy someone asks me "ouuuyy honey unwrangle my dingle in ur boioioiong and by sproingle well heh lets jsut say. my peanits. any thoughts on that mr yaoi?" and i just answer honestly straight from the heart no bullshit no rp skillz required

woaghhhhhh......... Former director of the peacekeepers homunculus clone Yomi Hellsmile from Master Detective Archives: Rain Code by Spike Chunsoft........ holy shshshit. He's Real......

disadvantages of being yomi kin:

the regular bullshittery that comes free with being fictionkin of any kind cut my wife into pieces this is my last divorce

everybody and their mom hates Yomi and even if the tag here is way less outright aggressive and I can just easily block anyone who makes me uncomfortable in any capacity, youtube is just unusable. Just. AuUUUghhhh. I know one of my fave dr youtubers is gonna play mdarc this year and I also know he's gonna absolutely hate Yomi with a passion and frequently pause the game to talk about how terrible he his yes we get it you are allowed to have opinions on fictional characters and aren't doing anything wrong by it whatever im gonns look up yomi softcore on pixiv fuka u

overly complicates my already fucked sense of self

Blood cravings got even worse😔 bad BAD this isn't sustenance it's toxic as hell christ dude STOP❗❗

not extremely likely but still very possible nightmare scenario where the precipitation cipher gets Big attracting those people and getting bombarded with kinnie jokes and annoying Ironic Kin For Fun crowd finding its way here. And that is the at best scenario, the worst one is 2015 kin drama reignited in 2020s you can't "kin" this character unless you're x or x, you can absolutely control who you're kin with and if i don't like your very voluntary choice you should stop (just stop man <3 i won't tell you how the fuck 😊) being fictionkin with a sinful evil abuser linux user makes you a bad person that deserves to be ostracized and harassed until you unlearn your problematic ways oh my god do any of you remember 2015 warrior cat kin drama what the fuck was that. i wasn't around in danganronpa fandom during that time but im pretty sure it may have been even worse there which is insane to even think about. but i mean like hey at least fictionkin were taken (mostly.) seriously back then (albeit considered deeply cringe by the masses) and not reduced to a cheap komaeda kinnies amiright joke

i suffered more than jesus actually. the demotion and arrest was SUPER unfair and cringe guys i promise im not gonna torture people from now on you can trust me in a position of power please please please no one did it like i did it

EJ MARTINA DZIE MIE KURWA WYWIEŹLI CO TO ZA ZADUPIE MARTINA. MARTINA NIE WYTRZYMAM JUŻ WEŹ HELIKOPTER I MIE KURWA ZABIERZ Z TEGO CHLEWU MAM DOŚĆ POMOCY <- wygnany do Rzeczypospolitej za swoje zbrodnie😔

Yomi is Real (threatening)

[simcardiac-arrested]

scenecut

i dont know if you know this (looks around) but i fucking love robots. Like badly. it’s terminal. it’s so so terminal. if there’s some shit i’m watching or reading and there is a little robot thang i will fall in love with them immediately. #1 fave speedrun like ohhhh oh my god. good fucking gtacious. I LOVE ROBOTS SO MUCH !!!! IT’S LIKE. i dont even know where to start. i think their character design is always banger of course. i love futuristic sleek robots and i love robots that are big and clunky. love when they have wires and perhaps buttons and latches and other such things … love when their metal is rusty or perfectly shiny. LOVE IT ALL SO BAD !!!! love when robots don’t look like anything at all and are just these abstract fucking cubes but i also utterly love animal and creature adjacent robots and humanoid robots. just straight up human looking robots too you guys are ok you can get in the pile . second of all why i love robots. it’s the themes ma.n . it’s the themes and narratives. of being something Other. of being created by someone to do something specific and then growing to be your own person. of learning to be human and sometimes learning you don’t have to be human at all. of expressing yourself in your own way. of living in this world how you see fit, not how other people want you to. THERE ARE SO MANY POSSIBILITIES !!!!! and yeah look i know it’s hashtag problematic to interpret robots as aroace or autistic buuuuut idgaf IDGAFFF !!!! DIDNT ASK !!!!!!!!! I LOVE DOING THIS TO ROBOTS I AM HITTING U WITH MY AAA BEAM !!!! FOREVER !!!!!!!!! because robots as a whole just. don’t fit in. they are ostracized because they are not inherently human. and they often tend to have AAA traits of not really understanding humanity and attraction . Cuz like look im aroace and autistic and yeah it’s cool and sexy and whatever but also to be serious for a moment. it’s isolating! it’s lonely. i often feel isolated from my friends and peers and (joker voice) Society as a whole. because there are many things i do not understand just, on a fundamental level. and see robots do this too because of simply Being Created . being not Born Right into this world . and i lauve it. i love robots who’s core theme is Not Fitting In. sentient robots who can’t quite fully relate to humans but also no longer relate to normal programmed robots. CYBORGS !!! MY MAN GENOS FROM ONE PUNCH MAN iiii have been uatistic aabout him for far too long. because look he is a cyborg, he doesn’t fucking fit in anywhere in the opm universe—he is not human, but he’s also not a monster, but he’s also not 100% robot. he’s just his own thing. he often questions his humanity, and one of the main themes of opm is that we don’t change because we’re human, we are human because we change. and throughout the whole story you can see genos changing and opening himself up to the world and. OKAY INB4 THIS TURNS INTO AN OPM/GENOS RANT (sorry i love him so much it’s licherally not my fault) what im trying to say is like. robots. of the metal variety . 👍So gooud

[emeraldoo]

HEY! HEY!! LOOK AT ME!!

LE MEH!!!

hi, my name is bastion!! i have lots of other names im ok with tho, like bb, b, 8, shiver, weird, etc! im not ok with the nickname EM or EMERALD!

i am a zombie, jumping spider, maned wolf kin and fict kin Shiver from spl3 <3 i am also NOT a minor!!!!!! 18 yrs :•)) im also a rogue of mind!! (homestuck hoe.)

i am a trans male! i use he/xe/it prns! currently questioning my romantic attraction (pretty sure im bi-gay), but i am asexual!

i am the host in the zipties system, a did system!! some of the head mates have their own blogs, which ill tag :•)

i am audhd, gad, ocd, and a general cluster b pd haver!! i also have some delusions from ~an unkown disorder~ so! working thru some stuff still!

HERE IS MY COHOST!! please please PLEASE follow me on here bc it is my current fave social media :)))

MY INTERESTS!!!!!!!

SPLATOON AUGHHHHH most of my blog is splatoon....

i freaking LOVE nnsg :•3333 the anime of ALL TIME!!

SCIENCE!!!!!!! i plan on majoring in microbiology and synthetic biology but i luv ALL science!!

MUSIC/BAND!! i play euphonium and play in marching band and concert ensembles <3

i luvvv itsv and atsv and all of the spiderverse stuf!!!!!! my fave spider in spider man india btw.!

GUILD WARS 2 AIUGHHJJJHHH THE BEST EVER ACTUWLLY. PLAY IT PLAY IT RNNNN

ALTERS!!

not all of our alters choose to make profiles, and we arent going to force them to make them. if you need to know them, just send a DM or ask

* = written by alter

BASTION (☘️): DAS ME BITCH! im the host and core of the system >:•D i am the main guy in this blog soooo ya. (he/him, xe/xem, it/its)

EM/@riddlekid (🧪): the rat. horrible terrible (/hj... i guess..!) obsessed with horrible ppl sooo. erm yeah. he is also a prosecutor.!! also second most freq fronter :•P (it/its, he/him)

JON/@just-dr (🎃): jon!! he is a protector and a fictive of jonathan crane.. he is nice :•)) he doesnt associate much with his source tho so shrugsies (he/him, they/them)

MILES (👤): i actually dont know much abt them... they do their job rlly good tho! protector n stuff.. cool! (they/them)

CORNELIUS (🩸): um... so it just split and formed prtty recently (as of 12/8/23) and i also. don't know much abt it! other than it's a fictive of cornelius stirk from batman unburied.. and a prosecutor! (it/its)

SILAS (🦕): little!! he is just a kiddo and he hasnt really used anything other than picrew on my phone so. but he likes colors and animals!! (he/him)

JADE (🌐): cutey patootie wolf thing! fictive of jade from homestuck andddd yeah!! cool (she/they)

KARKAT/@karkat-cornbread (🔥): fictive of karkat homestuck guy. gets very angry very fast. idk role but yeah. the amgry one ig (he/they)

* DAVE/@karkat-cornbread (🕶️): yea. is this bitch predictable or what lmfao (he/any)

* HAL/9K/@timothy-timeaus (🛑): Beep boop. Coolest splinter of Dirk. I'm also cool with the name Odyssey or 9k. (They/Them)

* EQUIUS (🐎): Yes hello I am Equius I am more active on the cohost but might still use this platform.

* DIRK/TIM/@timothy-timeaus (🔗): I'm my own subsystem of splinters. I'm just a ye ol Dirk splinter.

MY TAGGING SYSTEM!!

DNI :•(

its not rlly. much? the only stuff i rlly care abt is jerks.. if ur a jerkkk (terf, racist, zionist, ableist, antikin, sysmed, transmed, antikink, whatever girl u git the gist....)

i don't have especially strong opinions on most discourse... slurcourse, syscourse, flagcourse, shipcourse... its kinda silly.! so um. whatever.

* (Hal writing.) Our take on pro/antiship is "It doesn't fucking matter". We aren't proship, we aren't antiship, we are just kind of shipping whatever the fuck we want. If you think it's problematic, we most likely won't care. Unless there's a genuine reason to be concerned, don't bother.

exclusionists!!!! i don't like you!!!!!!!!!!!! aphones, panphobes, biphobes, mspec gay/lesbian haters, antixenogender, anti neoprns, whatever! i do not like you at all >:•{

hp fans... you know why :•) please find a better media ..

nsft centric blogs... it's fine if you post nsft! but i am not comf with interacting kink/bdsm blogs :•P but i am PRO KINK AND BDSM! i love you kinksters <3 and this is ALL kinks!! no take backsies, this includes the 'gross' ones!!!!

BYE BYE!!

[castielsupernatural]

im cheating and sending u the same numbers that you sent me because theyre like, the best questions okay 1, 2, 15, 19 KISSES

hiiiiii bestie my answers aren't nearly as interesting as yours sadly, i could NEVER be as well read as you. this got long so the tldr is don't listen to me for book recs just go to jess :)

1. book you’ve reread the most times?

technically it’s probably twilight but let’s say it’s not, and in that case let’s say it’s the raven boys by maggie stiefvater. it’s definitely my most heavily annotated book and i tend to date my annotations and well there’s just a lot of them

2. top 5 books of all time?

i’m gonna do a fiction list and a nonfiction list and again be nice bc i’m not super well read 😭😭 also in no particular order

fiction:

catching fire by suzanne collins sorry i’m a slut for the second book in a series

a gathering of shadows by v.e. schwab see above

the dream thieves by maggie stiefvater sigh. see above

six of crows by leigh bardugo

the secret history by donna tartt sorry women

nonfiction:

dark waters: flood and redemption in the city of masterpieces by robert clark

the power broker: robert moses and the fall of new york by robert caro

the line becomes a river: dispatches from the border by francisco cantù

dopesick: dealers, doctors, and the drug company that addicted america by beth macy

unsettling truths: the ongoing, dehumanizing legacy of the doctrine of discovery by mark charles and soong-chan rah sorry for listing a book on religion. also if these guys names mean anything to you pls do NOT look at me

15. recommend and review a book

ok ok gonna do my fave nonfiction i've read recently and some of you have been unlucky enough to hear me talk about it but it's the power broker by robert caro, it's a 1,200+ page brick of a nonfiction book published in the 1970's as a biography of robert moses and just new york city infrastructure in general. i read a lot of nonfiction and honestly a lot of the writing is just bad even if the content is interesting but this was seriously one of the most well-written pieces of work i've ever read and it completely changed the way i think about local government. some fun excerpts and all my notes:

granted, part of the fun was i read it with my dad and we had a lot of fun bonding over it, but still! it's been such a cool foundation for other works on urban studies, too - i recently finished davarian l baldwin's in the shadow of the ivory tower: how universities are plundering our cities and there was a whole chapter on new york that i felt really well-equipped to engage with

19. most disliked popular books?

ok not to be one of those ppl that are like teehee i hated it before it was problematic but genuinely i never got the hype about harry potter. i think the problem is i read them out obscenely out of order and probably just a little too young (i started with the order of the phoenix when i was 10) but nevertheless i've just never cared. more recently i read the midnight library and i was so unimpressed i was this could've just been a supernatural episode we didn't have to do all this

book asks <3

[linabirb]

👀👀👀 For the bingo, I'd like to hear your thoughts on Aki (csm just to be safe because its quite a common name haha), Makima, Isagi, Kaiser, Reo, and Mikoto.

.. OH BOY I HOPE YOU'RE READY TO HEAR SOME OF THE WORST TAKES EVER

.. i'm going to be honest. I GENUINELY FORGET AKI EXISTS SOMETIMES. like my brain just goes "uhhh remember denji and power's big bro" and im like "OH". if you remember my akutagawa bingo, i think you can see a pattern which can only be described as "i am so sorry but i just cannot make myself care about brooding dark-haired anime boys" 😭😭 (dan heng from hsr is one of the few exceptions) idk i really do think his story was sad but i'm also kinda like. i was too focused on other things when i read and watched csm JSKDSLASLSL. "what things" well.. let's talk about the next character on our list.

feel free to shoot me or stab me for this. but yes, THIS WOMAN IS ACTUALLY MY FAV CSM CHARACTER 😭 (along with kobeni and asa) i just love evil women! and i love well-written evil women! and i have so much to say about her. i genuinely love the way she was written and she's a very realistic character, but i am not a fan of how the csm fandom just. doesn't care about her character at all and cares only about her crimes and i'm not even talking about her basically destroying the whole world and killing SO MANY PEOPLE, i'm talking about her relationship with denji. which is, OF COURSE, bad and extremely toxic and unhealthy, especially considering that denji is a minor. however, i think seeing that as her only "personality trait" is so.. it just doesn't sit right with me. like i would be okay with people talking about everything she's done and analyzing it and going "yeah she's still a bad person even if she's well-written and deep" but i am NOT okay with people going "yeah she's a groomer and also she killed my faves :(" like. i don't know. if you don't want to interact with such "problematic" content just don't read it? though i'm gonna be honest i'm pretty sure most csm fans are very young and from what i heard, a lot of them haven't even read/watched any "dark" content before csm. me picking "they are innocent if u ignore their various crimes" is obv a joke, i definitely agree that makima is a terrible person, but also. i can't deny that she's pretty <3 and also the fact that she just needed a hug breaks my heart every time i think about it. i actually have a plushie of her too! one of the best purchases i've ever made, she stares at me with her big ol' yellow eyes and i do everything she says. thank you for motivating me to do my hw, queen.

but enough talking about my faves. honestly.. i don't really care about isagi? which actually makes me very sad bc i found him very relatable at first but then i kinda got bored? like i can't even describe his personality, i can only say "uhhh he's friendly with other guys unless he's playing football and also. uh. he likes football"? and ig that can also be very fun and i'm usually a huge fan of characters that usually act nice but also have a very rude and mean side, but isagi is just. idk, i don't really find him that interesting and those moments when he's like, busy analyzing everything and coming up with strategies.. honestly, i just skipped them JSDKSLSLS. I WANTED MORE ACTION OKAY. i think his relationship with bachira is cute though!

BACK TO MY FAVES. i would bite kaiser's head off if i ever got the chance but he's also one of my fav characters. yeah. he's so cool, i love his design sm, i need to look like him. i want to get into his head and figure out what's wrong with him. i want to squeeze him and crush him and tear him apart, but i also love him so much. tbh i don't know anything about the new chapters, but i'd love to learn more about him, it's like, at the same time, i want him to have a backstory that's a little bit (or maybe VERY) sad, but i also kinda want him to be like that just bc he can (even though i'm pretty sure it was implied that he does have a reason for acting like that). and yes, i love his relationship dynamic with ness. yeah.

reo. another fave of mine. though i actually didn't like him that much when i first saw him, but. i knew deep down that a purple boy will become one of my faves. love this gay disaster of a man, everything that happened between him and nagi was more entertaining than every single romance movie that i've ever watched. i want him to get better and realize that he's capable of doing great things without him. i also want him to become even more dependent on him for angst reasons. it's hard. and i honestly both love and hate that moment when he decides to return to nagi right after he finally started to get some character development, because YES I WANT HIM TO GROW AND I WANT HIS PERSONALITY TO BE SOMETHING OTHER THAN "if i spend at least one day w/o nagi i will die", but also it's very realistic and as someone who was in MULTIPLE (platonic) relationships that were exactly like his relationship with nagi.. that moment was very painful. in a good way. and again, i wanna look like him.

my relationship with mikoto is very hard to explain bc it's like. in theory, i'd love to learn more about him. i'd love to stan him. but also.. i'm not a fan of how the fandom pretty much makes his DID his only personality trait? maybe i'm just on the wrong side of the fandom, but i rarely see any posts about his other traits? again, i'd love to learn more bc i have a feeling that we have a lot in common, but. but yeah. i'm a huge fan of his minigram version though <3 so silly. so squishy. so funny. (honestly, me being salty that almost all convos about mikoto usually discuss his DID is so funny to me now that after three therapy sessions i've found out that i'm most likely a system SJHSJDKDLSL like bro THAT IS YOU) about "i would push them down the stairs" i mean it in a silly playful way :) like i want him to fall down and scream in a very cartoony and funny way.

[seiwas]

Ooh, I'm here for the top five game!

From JJK: Nanami, Megumi, Geto, Shoko, Yuta

From Bleach: Shunsui, Byakuya, Urahara, Renji, Rangiku

From BNHA: Aizawa, Bakugo, Iida, Shouto, Dabi

From Chainsaw Man: Aki, Kishibe, Power, Himeno (I know 😭, but I can explain), Makima (hear me out...)

I haven't watched Blue Lock, so I can't predict your faves. But uh, have you SEEN that Oliver guy? From what I know of him, he's a very charismatic womanizer. He's a problem (I have a thing for problematic characters)

lin!!!! so lovely to see you here❣️

jjk: nanami and megumi they r my 2 weaknesses lin truly 🥺 i have immense soft spots for them!! and suguru!!!! suguru i find soso interesting too and i’ve been trying to get into reading him as well bc so many of my mooties love him 🥺 and shoko and yuuta i love them!!! i wish they had more screentime 🥺

bnha: aizawa omff idk why but it feels so right for u to like him lik 😭😭😭 it just fits !!! i love him so much too 🥺 bkg and shouto are my babies!! and iida i think i had a phase for him once 😳🤧 and dabi omg touya bby !!!!! my heart aches for him immensely !!!! ive been wanting to read fic of him too bc i have a feeling i’ll love them 😭 and so many of my mooties love him too 🥺

bleach i haven’t fully watched but i did try to before!!! my attention span is so short i swear i pick things up then drop them so quick 🤧 aksksnxksn but chainsaw man!!! i’ve been wanting to watch for so long omg i hear it’s really good 😭 when i do watch it u’ll hear back from me !!!

i feel like ive briefly encountered some oliver fics omg 😭 but have no idea what he’s like aAaah he looks like a cross of toji and aizawa tho 😭😭😭

thank u so much for sharing these with me lin!!!! 🥹💓

send me ur top 5 from any anime or guess who my faves from blue lock will be !! let’s talk abt it !! 🥹

[antiv3nom]

you know what it is. blue lock for the fandom ask game! :)

YESSSS AMAZING <3

blorbo (favorite character, character I think about the most)

we know its bachira. we know this. of course it is. i love him so very much your honor

scrunkly (my “baby”, character that gives me cuteness aggression, character that is So Shaped)

NANASE MY BOY <3 <3 <3 hes just!!! a little guy!!! i think hes so very neat!!!

scrimblo bimblo (underrated/underappreciated fave)

i think there needs to be more love for hiori!!! my favorite gamer!!!!!! hes just...hes so neat and i love his hair and i wish we got more of him :(

glup shitto (obscure fave, character that can appear in the background for 0.2 seconds and I won’t shut up about it for a week)

tbh i think niko fits? hes not particularly obscure but like. we really dont see him much, especially when u consider the Amount That I Love This Boy Hes So Good I Adore Him He Could Be In The Background Of A Single Panel And I Would Yell For Days

poor little meow meow (“problematic”/unpopular/controversial/otherwise pathetic fave)

oh lord this is tough bc theres not like. not any particular character who's really a completely "problematic" fave in this case bc Theyre All Assholes to an extent, yk? i suppose shidou and/or sae might count, but i enjoy them in different ways? i support shidou's violence and simply Look Away from sae's shittiness

horse plinko (character I would torment for fun, for whatever reason)

im putting gagamaru in the horse plinko <3 NOT BECAUSE I DONT LOVE HIM! i just. i want to study him. like a bug. wanna see him in the plinko. watch his reactions.

eeby deeby (character I would send to superhell)

kaiser.

[lizhly-writes]

ok idk his name but u know. the guy. who replaced septimus and who vivian hates. until they figure out it was accidental and things get Awkward. 1, 6, 11, 13, 22? those last couple of questions of the ask meme seem like they apply to a group rather than a single character BUT I TRUST U TO FIGURE IT OUT

squints at you. who are you. normally, i wouldn't be super curious, but i must have seen you on orvcord, that's too much detail for you to be a tumblr-only...

oh well! this guy! mr. i'll-not-even-tell-you-my-name-on-my-goddamn deathbed!

If your OC was part of a group project, would they goof off or help work on the project?

He'd work on the project. And he'd be sooo soo passive aggressive to anyone who wasn't. And then if he got called on it, he'd play dumb about it, and then maybe get more passive aggressive about it until something exploded, probably. Quite possibly that something would be his own temper.

6. How would your OC react if they found out their fave was problematic?

Question it. He probably wouldn't look very hard into it. He'd continue on normally until evidence was shoved directly into his face, at which point, he's just go "WELL OF COURSE EVERYTHING IN THE WORLD IS TERRIBLE." And then he'd do nothing about it, somehow spitefully.

11. Would your OC get lost in a mall the minute they walk inside?

Nah, his sense of direction is actually really good? He'd actually probably be pretty good at mapmaking. Not that he knows that.

13. Does your OC like magic or science more?

In fiction, he prefers magic. In reality, he prefers science, on account of the fact that actually makes sense to him.

22. Who’s cooking skills are so bad that there’s a good chance they could burn water?

I'm going to interpret this as "How are his cooking skills?" To answer that question: he's fine. He's okay. He's not great, but he's capable of making stuff that tastes good. Courtesy of cooking for himself forever.

He could probably set water on fire out of pure spite though ahahaha

send me an ask!

[madtriggerz]

og vocaloid fans who hate on project sekai fans r so annoying. they say "pjsk fans ruined the vocaloid fandom! it was great before prsk came out!" which sounds dishonest.

1: ur just mad that vocaloid content is becoming more popular. hatsune miku is a multi million dollar name that has existed since 2007, vocaloid in general has been around longer than that. stop treating it like it's an unknown thing. u are not cool for liking vocaloid before everyone else, u look like a dork.

2: the things u hate on project sekai for are things that u like in project diva. u can say u dont like project sekai, but if u talk about shit like how the different mikus are stupid in that game, im gonna need u to click on this link right here.

3: if u think that the vocaloid fandom has been tainted only because of the existence of project sekai, i have a question for u. have u been living under a rock??? any fandom that has lasted as long as the vocaloid fandom have so many skeletons in the closet that it not even shocking. this isn't hypothetical, this is fact. hell, the same people who complain about the fandom being ruined by prsk are the same people who wont let go of their "problematic fave" producers.

stop having an holier than thou attitude about how u got into vocaloid. u don't look like a cool guy who is epically owning the cringe idiot prsk fans. u look like a dork who can't grasp the concept that people can get into things in different ways than u.

u sound like those people who go "yeah i used to listen to this band but it got popular...the new fans r so annoying i wish the band was underground again." get a grip.

[sasukeless]

hellooo kaneki and/or hide for the ask game!

Hiii<3 i will do both because those are my meow meows

Kaneki

sexuality headcanon: bisexual but this is kinda like a given isnt it

otp: hidekane. i love suffering!!!

brotp: the quinx squad even if the one that we see more a relationship with them was haise.

notp: mmm i dont know much about tg ships besides the basics and im like ok with them so

first headcanon that pops into my head: kid kaneki probably cried if u stepped on bugs in front of him

favorite line from this character: AHHH theres so many.... i think "i wont back away. i'm moving forward. like a centipede" is one that i rotate in my mimd alot

one way in which I relate to this character: mmmm i think i relate to kaneki but like pre-everything kaneki like when he was just a normal guy who enjoyed reading books

thing that gives me second hand embarrassment about this character: theres some panels of black reapper kaneki where his hair looks like helmet 😭

cinnamon roll or problematic fave?: i mean yeah he has eat and killed thousands people but overall hes a really nice guy 💗

Hide

sexuality headcanon: bi too i think. hidekane are bi4bi to me

otp: hidekane again <3

brotp: THE WAY WE DONT KNOW ALMOST ANYTHING ABOUT HIM TO GET A CHOICE IN THIS. anyways i like to pretend him and tsukiyama become besties because i feel like that would be hilarous for some reason. like hannibal befriending naruto

notp: again dont really know??

first headcanon that pops into my head: he buys every eye-soring yellow piece of clothing you could think just because

favorite line from this character: "im gonna show you that youre worth saving. worth living" i just... i just *falls to my knees*

one way in which I relate to this character: me 🤝 hide after kaneki starts killing people: hes just going through a rough time okay

thing that gives me second hand embarrassment about this character: someone said that anime hide's hair makes him look like a french fry and i hate it

cinnamon roll or problematic fave?: HES INNONCENT. LITERALLY THE ONE PERSON IN TG WHO HAS NEVER DONE ANYTHING WRONG AT ALL AND ITS THE MOST SELFLESS LOVING PERSON!!1!!

[wheretheeternalare]

I posted 944 times in 2022

207 posts created (22%)

737 posts reblogged (78%)

Blogs I reblogged the most:

@ohwhatevers

@wheretheeternalare

@iskierka

@you-marvelous-creature

@vriskarlmarx

I tagged 552 of my posts in 2022

Only 42% of my posts had no tags

#historical people - 8 posts

#doctor who - 5 posts

#ofmd - 5 posts

#the lair of the white worm - 3 posts

#but still - 3 posts

#at least in my city - 2 posts

#having a dryer in a house is normal having a dryer in an apartment is a rare luxury - 2 posts

#cringe - 2 posts

#happy halloween - 2 posts

#thank u to the random ppl who gave this a bunch of notes?? - 2 posts

Longest Tag: 139 characters

#the thing is that since covid i've been systematically revisiting all of my old interests but most of my faves turned out to be problematic

My Top Posts in 2022:

#5

ok covid aside WHO has new years eve parties. in college i thought it was just the nature of college where winter break falls over new years so you’re always home with your family instead of in the same place as your friends but now im an adult and i still have this problem

12 notes - Posted December 31, 2021

#4

what do we think of my new look

13 notes - Posted June 14, 2022

#3

everyone on this website loves the enemies to lovers dynamic but almost every iteration of this sucks because there’s a sweet spot where they’re falling in love and/or want to fuck but they still kind of hate each other. but then shortly after there’s a turning point where they realize they actually like each other and then everything after that is boring romance drivel and the spark is dead. they have to keep hating each other on some level for it to stay sexy!

15 notes - Posted July 16, 2022

#2

i find it hilarious that there’s a contingent of ppl in the ofmd fandom that wants stede to fix izzy in s2 because in actuality stede would have absolutely no interest in doing that. izzy is the only person he shows open contempt for. he fucking hates this guy he’s not gonna care if he redeems himself or not. and i love that for him

20 notes - Posted May 1, 2022

My #1 post of 2022

im self-promoting again but this is not your average self-promotion because it is in fact me begging everyone i know to practice waste reduction. but i know that zero waste sounds v intimidating and can be really hard depending on your circumstances so here are some things that me and my girlfriend have been doing that are low-cost and possible to do in a one-bedroom apartment with no outdoor space!

20 notes - Posted January 3, 2022

Get your Tumblr 2022 Year in Review →

[mintbees]

seeing newer dreamsmp fans argue about wether they should like [x] character because theyre doing “problematic” stuff is so funny, when wilbur was planning to blow up L’manberg we were cheering him on

[munamania]

okay im caving. im watching druck now <3 thx druck mutuals for making me do this xoxo