#(theyre supposed to fully replace the floor

[virtuangel]

texted landlord ✅️

[stillfertile]

Oh if we’re talking about new ideas for omegaverse, I have one that I’ve been trying to write for a while!!!

I’ve always found the idea of betas being just boring Nothings really… idk, bland? Like. There’s this whole new world out there with alphas and omega, and you decide that betas, who are supposed to outnumber both of the other two, are/do/smell like nothing? Where’s your sense of adventure!!!

I see betas as Mediators. Their presence/scents/voice can help smooth an alpha in rut or an omega in heat. If an alpha smells an omega in heat, they can get frantic enough that they start hurting themselves/others around them, so a beta can be introduced to nullify the scent of the omega, and help calm the alpha’s raging instincts. Maybe not fully, but at least until the alpha can get control of themselves.

On the other hand, when an omega in heat starts to pump out pheromones to draw in nearby alphas, a beta can temporarily satiate the omega’s need to draw in alphas until they can get somewhere private/find their usual heat partner.

I can imagine.. like, alpha Dumo going into pre-rut in the locker room after practice, pacing the floor near the showers back and forth because he can smell an omega in there. Until Kailer steps in, surrounding Dumo with his scent and drawing him away so they can head to a trainer’s room and calm down enough to get Dumo home.

Thanks for coming to my Ted talk!!!

THIS IS SUCH A COOL IDEA I agree, betas should be special too :3 In lots of fic I see betas are treated as a safe space for both alphas and omegas to go to, so your idea with them being a mediator just enhances that role, with the added affects of scent n stuff!! smart!!

ooo kailer as a beta is so good, I love him cause he’s shy and tiny but he’s also a pursuer (like sid), he’s bold and goes after what and who he wants and has fun with it, completely not what youd expect at first

ok but NOW I need a fic about a beta in love with an alpha or omega but they dont think they should pursue them cause betas are supposed to be mediators, replacements, until the alpha can get an omega (or vise-versa), the beta convinces themself theyll never be enough for an alpha or an omega, but in reality the alpha/omega they like loves them back and doesnt care that theyre a beta :’)

[becauseplot]

dont mind me tripping and falling in here again. but i would also love to hear about botw au. legend of zelda au's my absolute beloved they have me running circles around my room. adrenaline shot straight to the heart nothing digs its claws in me quite like loz and i am so so interested to hear about it!! clingyduo doomed to save the world in every universe,,,, i'm invested already

thank you so much for humoring me, i love botw aus so much theyre aaaa!! aaAAAAAaaAaaAAa!!!!

so yeah this originally started bc an old friend of mine and i were talking and i forget who suggested it but we were like "hey wouldn't tommyinnit as link be so funny? because tommyinnit is like the exact opposite kind of feral-energy of botw link. loud and swears and uncontrollable and headstrong. hylia's most annoying hero." and things just devolved from there. it's fully a Crack Treated Seriously situation because i spent actual months working out lore n worldbuilding and whatnot fhdjskhfdk.

the fic is officially called Well, Excuuuuuuuse Me, Big Man: The BotW AU No One Asked For (or WEMBM for short)

basic layout (as far as i went with it anyway):

tommy more-or-less follows the order of what you're "supposed" to do to to beat the game: plateau->kakariko->hateno->kakariko again->four main regions->master sword->ganon. of course there are a lot of detours and back-tracking and skipping around for hyjinx

main regions/inhabitants are replaced: Zora->Axols (axolotl "hybrids"), Gorons->Piglins, Rito->Elytrians, Gerudo->Enderians

each of the above races have their own cultures that are loosely based off of the game's original counterparts and some mcrp fanon + personal headcanons thrown in. they're customized to incorporate some (mild) minecraft elements!!

old champions: Mipha->Niki, Daruk->Technoblade, Rivali->Philza, Urbosa->Ran (based loosely off of tftsmp Ran, effectively an oc lmao????)

new champions: Sidon->Foolish (Niki's younger brother) and Jack (Niki's best friend), Yunobo->Drista, Teba->Wilbur, Riju->Ranboo

all of their personalities more-or-less remain intact (which is why the fact that i put The Old Man / King Rhoam as Schlatt so fucking funny)

divine beasts keep their names but the creatures change!! Ruta is a glow squid, Rudania is a blaze, Medoh is still a bird (LMAO i might change this because...), Naboris is a phantom

some scattered details

wilbur is both the "new" champion role AND kass' role!! he and tommy meet early on in his journey (at his first visit to Hateno) but tommy doesn't learn about wilbur's heritage (Philza was his great great great grandfather) until MUCH later. they run into each other a lot during their travels.

wilbur also has a hardcore crush on an axol warrior named sally, which tommy teases and embarrasses him relentlessly for

tubbo (zelda-role) keeps zelda's arc of not being able to develop powers. the key difference is that tommy and tubbo are friends before the calamity business starts to get serious, and tubbo's frustration drives a wedge between them

(angst time: clingy duo has a Big Fight during that one sheikah slate Memory on the palace tower bridge, and they never get the chance to apologize to each other before it all goes to shit and tommy dies sacrificing himself to save tubbo.)

techno and phil are old friends from when they'd do colosseum fights together. they haven't talked much for a few years before becoming champions, both too busy with their respective duties at home, but the moment they realize they've both been recruited well, they're inseparable

windbombing, bullet-time bouncing, and shield clipping are canon. don't question it.

champion ran is a dick (think revali) and the only one there they respect is niki because they underestimated her and then she proceeded to floor them during a sparring session (and she didn't even threaten them with a water based attack, it was all skill)

awesamdude (most people call him "sam", he's ranboo's personal guard) has a half brother named awesamnook (most people call him "nook" or "samnook"). he's the Beedle-role and he talks in all caps like an npc ("HELLO TRAVELER." "Why are you shouting---" "HAVE A LOOK AT MY WARES." "Okay---")

bad runs the yiga-equivalent egg cult that, instead of disguising themselves as travelers, simply uses sprouts of blood-red flowers with a toxic pollen to mind-control bystanders into attacking tommy (yikes)

have some highlights from the few chapters i've written of tommy on the great plateau (yes, the entire google doc is written in comic sans)

tommy immediately sassing tubbo's disembodied voice:

tommy is 7 feet from the cave and is shoving things in his mouth:

(I should also mention he has a pet beetle in his pocket named Sir Legs)

tommy has a grudge against the sheikah pedestals, it's a whole arc on the plateau as he slowly comes to love and appreciate the pedestals and what they do for him:

old man J vs tommy's unwavering optimism(bullheadedness):

tommy vs disembodied voices:

tommy vs the first shrine:

tommy meets a monk:

pulling a direct line from philza's botw playthrough for this one:

me when i fast travel:

The loading screen says: "Leaving Comments: Leaving comments on a fic is a great way to make a writer go :D and give them the motivation they need to continue their bullshittery."

also some chapter titles:

[heyitsyn]

Manager!Seijoh Part 8

a/n: okay so since my halloween special was a flop ill write this instead but uwuwuwuwu its also my birthday today so hehe this is kinda a special request too :D

WAIT YOU GUYS THIS IS TOTALLY IRRELEVANT IF YOURE NOT A POTTERHEAD BUT OMG I SHARE THE SAME BIRTHDAY AS SIRIUS BLACK LIKE WHAT :”) I THINK I SAVED A COUNTRY IN MY PAST LIFE OR SOMETHING :”)

for more seijoh content, check this masterlist out!

anon:

- IF IT WAS YOUR BIRTHDAY! omg :0 i think we can all agree that the ramen shop will get GOOD BUSINESS that day. but it was a total surprise when the upperclassmen basically JUMP you after exiting your last class. vball practice? deliberately cancelled cuz today is YOUR day. kyo leading you, iwa making sure your eyes are closed while oikawa keeps teasing you on how you’re letting a group of men take you BLIND (cue the PUNCH). your smile is worth the XXX amount spent c,:

LOOK HOW CUTE MATTSUHANA ARE IN THIS LIKE OMG ITS LIKE IWAOI SPIRIT SWITCHED W THEIRS AND NOW IWAOI HAVE TO PULL THEM APART INSTEAD OF THE OTHER WAY AROUND

okay yay happy birthday to me uwu

i kinda put this request off since my borfday was right around the corner so hahaha to the anon who requested this, here it is!!!

okay anyways!!!

so today is your borfday

obvs this could be any day lmao it doesnt have to be today but it can be any day just pretend the calendar was different lmao

you were born today and your parents and natsu obvs celebrated it the morning you woke up

like you were peacefully holding your squirtle plushie and snuggling close to get more sleep bc it was still early

but natsu quite literally kicked your door down and your parents walked in with a large cake with candles

STEPBRO WHAT ARE YOU-

okay ill stop now

ofc you were startled bc what the hek 

like you were so surprised that you rolled off the bed and landed harshly on the floor

instead of being yanno ‘yey! its my borfday!’ you were like ‘dear asahi kill me’

waking you up at the buttcrack of dawn?

lmao 10/10 not recommend

natsu felt really bad and he pulled you up from the floor and situated you back on the bed while your parents backtracked back downstairs

‘ohmygosh babygirl im so sorry i didnt mean to hulk smash you to the floor’

im sorry sir what 💀

this whore

you waved him off but he still felt guilty so he just pressed kisses to your forehead to soothe it

meanwhile youre just leaning against him, eyes closed, bc you grew up with natsu always doing this whenever you got hurt so it was such a soff moment for you

eventually, he was able to bring you downstairs and your parents were lowkey scared lmao but you smiled at them

‘thank you for the cake’

they breathed a sigh of relief and you sat down on the chair to eat breakfast

‘here darling’

you accepted the bowl of rice from your madre and you ate your birthday breakfast with them while yall are saving the cake for later during dinner

when you finished, you were getting up and shouting up the stairs that you were showering first

hehe natsu was all like ‘lmao why? its like 4 in the morning’

you froze, foot hovering over a step and you sighed

‘excuse me what 💀‘

yea no

you were dragged back to the kitchen and you were all pouty bc duh who the hek wants to wake up that early but your parents saved themselves by giving you your parents early

(literally anything you guys want they gave you okay? but only like 3 lmao not a bajillion things)

you were still grateful for everything and you felt very much appreciated

since it was still early, you just decided to screw it and got ready to go to school early and set up the gym for early morning practice

natsu volunteered to go with you to school but you shook your head

‘nah, im okay. the walk is peaceful’

he huffed, crossing his arms, but nodded anyways

‘fine. only because its your birthday’

hehehehe the amount of freedom during your day of birth

you were of course the first one in the gym but you didnt mind bc you actually liked the quietness that was so rare inside there

you turned on some (f/m) (lmao favorite/music) and you were sweeping, unknowingly swaying and dancing slightly

at around 5:40, the third years have arrived and since theyre the eldest, they usually get there first

omg the blush explosion on their faces when they saw you twirling around with the mop and ofc oikawa being the little poopie head he is, he swooped in and held your waist

you got startled but seeing the soft brown eyes of your captain made a soft smile appear on your face

‘hello, oikawa-san’

you whispered and he nuzzled his face to the side of your head softly

‘morning, y/n-chan’

before he could go on, iwa threw him away behind him and you giggled

mattsun raised an eyebrow at your odd behavior

‘hm? why are you so happy today, y/n-chan?’

you stopped then chuckled

‘nothing much, mattsun-san’

you didnt really want to tell them it was your birthday bc tbh you didnt think it was a big deal or anything

the others werent complaining bc they rarely see you so lively and upbeat and they loved it

you were humming under your breath for gods sake

the other boys have trickled in and again, they also went ‘?’

your soft smiles, giggles, and joy was everything to them 

god bless for this beautiful morning

poor kindaichi cowered in fright as he braced himself for a scolding from you for missing a block but he got even more scared when you just patted his head

‘its okay, yuu-kun. there’s always a next time’

yea there was something wrong

unfortunately, school was starting and they weren’t able to start questioning you and there aint no way kindaichi and kunimi were going to do that themselves without the upperclassmen who could calm you down if you got too defensive

you were skipping down the hallway and you even looped your arms around your first year friends and they shared a confused look before being dragged by you

during class, darling kunimi was too busy and distracted by your quiet singing of some show that takeru watched when you were over

‘KUNIMI-SAN, IS MATH SO BORING THAT YOU FIND INTEREST ON L/N-SAN INSTEAD?’

yes, yes it is

but he didnt say that and instead turned away so fast that you felt the wind beside you

DID A 180 CRAZY~~~

he texted the separate bros group chat about you still being all happy and they were all curious as to what makes you so happy

during lunch time, kindaichi usually went over to go eat with you and kunimi right?

but he was surprised when he just saw kunimi there without you

‘wh-’

‘i dont know’

‘what do you mean you dont know?!’

nah fam we not dying yet

natsu texted you earlier that he had a bento for you that he made himself and he wanted you to eat it instead of the one your mom made

you were passing by the building entrance door thingy and caught the attention of the third years who were at the rooftop eating their lunch

there was also other students outside and they watched your flowery aura skip over to the equally attractive hiroshi natsu

‘y/n-chan~’

he cooed and you smiled up at him

curse him and his tall height

he let you hold the f/c cloth covered box so he could cup your face and kiss over your booboo again

‘wo mow, matsu-’

translation: no more, natsu!

you whined as he kept kissing your forehead and you were turning red at the attention from the other students

dang oikawa crushed his juice box at the sight even though he knew natsu was just a cousin

‘ill save you, y/n-chan!’

he shouted, already flying down the stairs towards you and the other third years after him to keep him from doing something stupid

but they also lowkey wanna see you too

but by the time they reached the entrance, you were already walking away and even passed by the quartet, giving them a close-eyed smile and a cute ‘hello!’

the 3 were distracted by you and were coddling you while oikawa ran out and shouted after natsu’s retreating form

‘natsu! oi, natsu!’

as if the boy was purposely ignoring him, natsu kept walking forward

‘HIROSHI NATSU!’

his scream finally made him turn around and natsu’s face held a teasing smirk

‘oya? chibi-chan?’

KDJFSLFDFKDSJKFD YES YOU CALLED?

oikawa huffed and panted as he firmly walked over to natsu

‘tell me, hiroshi natsu. why is y/n-chan all cutesy and happy today?’

then the smirk fell, replaced by an actual, genuine annoyed look

‘hah?’

oikawa blinked

‘what do you mean ‘hah’?’

natsu waved his hands around in a frenzy of shock

‘so you mean to tell me, you, oikawa tooru, the dude who literally woke up the neighborhood at the buttcrack of dawn a few weeks ago, in love with my cousin, doesn’t know what today is?’

‘was i supposed to,,,, know?’

KSDLFJSDKFJDS THIS DUDE

natsu’s face became a meme and the guy was so disappointed that he just turned around and continued walking

oikawa gasped and clutched natsu’s arm, begging and pleading to tell him

ofc the little shite natsu is, he smirked down at oikawa’s kneeling form

‘hmm, gotta say, chibi-kun. i like this view~’

KDSLFJSDKFJLSDKFJDKS WHOS CHILD ARE YOU, HIROSHI NATSU

‘tell me, natsu-chan!’

the puppy eyes of oikawa tooru not only affected girls but also boys fully socked homosexual boys so natsu had to turn away, fighting down a blush

stay loyal to katsuki

stay loyal to katsuki

stay loyal to katsuki

wait, no, probably tetsu

or kenma

or both

or keiji

‘-me! natsu-chan!’

that snapped the pink-haired boy out of his thoughts and crossed his arms, glaring down at oikawa

‘hm, why do you wanna know so bad? youre on your knees, begging me for information you shouldve already known since you claim to like her so much’

oikawa pouted and he sniffled

‘i wanna know everything about y/n-chan. i wanna know what today is so i can make her as happy as she is today forever!’

‘youre so cheesy’

natsu chided and oikawa pouted even harder causing natsu to sigh and pinch his nose

‘the girl was born today’

oikawa’s face lit up and he hurriedly stood on his feet, hands on natsu’s biceps since he could barely reach natsu’s shoulders bc of his 6′5 height

‘its her birthday today?!’

‘i literally just said that-’

‘oh my gosh! we need to plan something!’

oikawa started but then frowned

‘but we’re in school so it would be too late to do a surprise when we finish’

his mumbles 

filled their vicinity and natsu finally realized where exactly they were so he tugged the still mumbling boy over to the side out of people’s view

ohmygosh if i saw 2 handsome, tall, hot boys there, id be staring too omg

‘oi, oikawa’

he still didnt budge until natsu had to kick him at the leg

rip not his knee yall

tooru flinched and hatefully glared at the boy but natsu pointedly glared at him right back

‘before you start bitching to me, i was just gonna suggest i can help you and your little plan to woo my baby cousin’

as if he wasn’t irritated in the first place, tooru lit up and he excitedly clung onto natsu

‘really? you’ll really help me?’

natsu rolled his eyes and tried to pry the brunette off of him but he felt the grip tighten

‘listen, oikawa, as much as i like having pretty boys hang on to me, i’d really appreciate if you just back off a bit and actually understand what im saying’

can i just say how long their lunch break is?

and not at natsu trying to get with oikawa and oikawa completely missing it

‘you can go do your education scam system thing while i can go set things up over at that one noodle place she likes’

natsu explained

oikawa was about to smile until he paused and leaned away

‘theres a catch. i know theres a catch’

then natsu smirked, confirming oikawa’s suspicion

‘ill think about what i really want but for now, i just wanna see that one doggie boy you guys have. also, your friend with the big arms’

lmao imagine the surprise in oikawa’s face

‘YOU GO FOR THEM BUT NOT ME?!’

‘why? you want me to?’

‘YES! i mean, well-no but YES!’

‘*sigh*’

thats how oikawa ended up telling the boys about the last minute birthday surprise for you and the help from natsu

‘yea, apparently its her birthday. also, iwa-chan, kyoken-chan, you need to talk to natsu-chan’

‘hah?! why?!’

‘THAT IDIOT?!’

you were minding your own business during class until you saw kunimi raise his hand

‘yes, kunimi-kun?’

‘bathroom’

normally, you wouldve just looked away but you noticed him grab his bag when the teacher wasn’t looking which prompted you to sigh since he was skipping class

i mean, whats the point of skipping class when the day is about to be over in like 15 minutes anyways?

‘make sure to come to practice’

you whispered when he passed and he smiled, making you raise an eyebrow bc that was a smile you knew that had a hidden meaning behind it

when the bell rang, everyone nyoomed themselves out of there and you were just walking past the door when a body came crashing to you which made you distracted and allowed a chance of vulnerability

there was a pair of hands covered your eyes from behind, hands grabbed your own from in front, and an arm around your waist started to guide you forward

‘um, just so you know, i have the power of god, anime, and iwa-san by my side and i wont hesitate to kick you in the di-’

‘its so cute when y/n-chan threatens us’

a voice from in front of you hums and you smiled

‘you wont think im really cute once youre on the floor clutching your di-’

‘oi, y/n, ill wash your tongue with soap’

‘yes, iwa-san’

you continued to walk, completely trusting at the hands of your boys, when you felt yourself being pulled to turn a corner

‘iwa-san? aren’t we going to the gym? why are we exiting the gates?’

the boys exchanged a look of amazement at your sense of intuition and the accuracy of your guess despite being deprived of your senses

‘dont think you can lie to us, y/n-chan! how could you not tell us its your birthday today?!’

you heard mattsun a few feet in front of you whine and you giggled

‘its not important’

then kyotani scoffed, you knowing it was him by feeling him twitch by the arm around your waist

‘boke, of course its important’

‘so your punishment for lying to us, we’re kidnapping you’

makki teased and you rolled your eyes beneath iwa’s hands

‘oh, shiver me timbers’

the walk continued, you still being dragged around, and you heard oikawa laugh

‘oh dear, its a sight to see, ain’t it? if only you can see the looks people are giving us, y/n-chan~ a group of boys taking a little girl like you? how could you trust us to not do something to you-ACK!’

you cut him off when you lifted your foot to kick right where it hurts the most

forget his weewee

its the knee

poor child crumbled to the floor and had to be picked up by baby watari

‘oh wata-cchi, youre the only one who cares about oikawa-san!’

you heavily sighed at the exagerrated theatrics of your captain

‘the one day. the one day when he could be a normal person for once’

you grumbled but stopped when you heard iwa laugh by your ear

‘he’s right you know. you technically lied to us when we asked if there was something special’

you shivered and you leaned your head back

‘its okay, iwa-san. we can talk about it after this event. make sure to give me my present, okay?’

SKDLFJSDKFJDSKFLDS GIRL NO I CANT I WANNA JUMP-

but iwa chuckled and he promised you that you would love his present

kyotani’s arm tightened around you, as if prompting you that he was still there and he wanted your attention too

‘careful there, pup’

he warned when you almost tripped over air

‘hehe, i know ill always be safe when youre next to me, kyo-san’

you teased and he was lucky your eyes were covered bc you would see the way his cheeks tinted red

‘s-shut up, idiot! maybe i shouldve just let you fall and hit your head! not like its gonna do damage since theres nothing there anyways!’

you just giggled and he retaliated by pinching your waist to which you squealed and gripped his hands

then the smell of the ramen broth entered your nose

‘are we-?’

‘nope! not there yet, y/n-chan!’

oikawa’s voice made you whine and complain but then he stopped, making everyone else stop too

‘okay, iwa-chan, kyoken-chan, release her!’

both grumbled something about you being treated like a pokemon but stopped when your eyes widened and contorted into confusion

‘huh?’

oikawa grinned and your eyes met to see the way his eyes crinkled, a tell-tale sign that this one was a rare genuine smile

‘come on! lets go!’

you let him take you inside the restaurant until your feet stopped, eyes wide when you noticed the streamers and the cake by the corner

your parents stood with natsu by the table and a large smile decorated your face

‘you,, you did this for me?’

you whispered and the team made noises of agreement

‘we had to do something for you to celebrate the day you were born. its a special day because you came into the world and we were able to meet you’

yahaba grinned and you gave him a big hug but you leaned back a bit so that the others would know you’re talking to them too

‘everyone, thank you. i love you’

they all scoffed a bit to hide their flustered state but they still smiled and each gave you a hug

‘oi! come here and eat the food! oikawa’s paying today!’

natsu shouted, which caught the attention of some customers in the restaurant, but they just ignored it bc theyve seen you and the team so many times that yall practically lived there

‘what?! i didnt-’

oikawa started but your mother came up to him and clasped her hands to his, sharing the same exact grin you have

‘you must be oikawa tooru. y/n has told me loads about you’

excuse him while he descends to heaven bc your mother is practically another you

iwa was already acquainted with your dad so they started talking and you just stood back, observing your two families interact with each other

you were so unbelievably happy that it hurts

kindaichi noticed you and he slinked away from the debate between makki and mattsun to go sling an arm around you

‘so? what do you think?’

you turned to him with glassy eyes

‘im so blessed. so blessed to have these amazing people with me’

poor babie panicked a bit bc he didnt really know how to comfort a crying girl but he just wrapped his arms around you

‘hehe, its kinda the other way around actually. we’re blessed to have someone like you’

he whispered and you giggled then playfully hit his shoulder

‘so cheesy, yuu-kun’

he leaned away from the hug and gave you an offended look

‘but its true! i dont know what we did to have-’

‘Y/N-CHAN! NO! HELP!’

oikawa shouted from the other side, cutting off your soft moment with kindaichi

‘what are you doing, natsu?’

you noticed your cousin wrapping his arms around your captain and trying to drag him away but poor tooru was scrambling to escape

‘we made a deal, didnt we, darling~? i know what i want now and youre going to have to give me you’

oikawa screamed

a/n: can we please pretend i posted this on november 3? bc i was dumb and forgot to post this and KLDJLSDKFJDSKD IM SO ANGRY but its okay at least i am able to publish this haha

[wickedsingularity]

Avalanche [one-shot]

Fandom: MCU Pairings/characters: Bucky Barnes x reader (but not really), Steve Rogers, Natasha Romanoff, mention of Wanda Maximoff Words: 3757 Warnings: Lime, repressed emotions, accidental exhibitionism

Note: Something @iguess-theyre-mymess​ gave me an idea for when I was doing NaNoWriMo last year, but that whole thing went to hell. There something not right here, with the characterizations. We've discussed it, but then I forgot all about it, and now I'm just... fuck it. There's some smut here, people will ignore characterization as long as there's smut. Sue me.

Summary: She wasn't supposed to be on this mission with Bucky, but plans had changed, then plans had gone wrong and now they had missed their flight window. Sexual tension rise to the surface while they wait in the safe house, and when an avalanche makes them stuck, repressed feelings rise up too.

It wasn't clear what was louder, the roaring wind outside or the heaving breaths of the two bodies that had just pulled apart with a groan and laid next to each other. Neither of the two noticed the wind however, completely lost in the bliss as they were.

"That was..." she started. It had been good. Very, very good. But not a chance in hell she was going to say those words. She did not want to give him the satisfaction, not after the way he behaved during this mission.

"Yeah." Bucky concurred.

They lay in awkward silence for a couple of minutes to catch their breaths, until she rolled to her side, her back to him. "Well, goodnight."

Bucky made a sound of annoyance, and swiftly turned his back to her too and pounded his fist into his pillow unnecessarily hard to fluff it up. Despite the vibe of annoyance that hung in the sex-smelling air, both fell asleep within minutes.

After finishing a mission deep in Lapland, the two of them had been forced to take refuge in a safe house to rest up. Steve was supposed to have gone with Bucky, but something had come up and she had had to replace the captain. To say she was unhappy about it was an understatement, especially because she was supposed to have gone on a simple recon mission to the much warmer and prettier Puerto Rico, but that mission had gone to Wanda instead. So now she had spent two days in the coldest, snowiest place on Earth with a Bucky Barnes that had been more pig-headed than usual.

The moment they had closed the door to the cabin behind them, they had been at each other's throats. He had insisted that the plan wouldn't work and they should take a different approach and she had claimed that his suggestion would take too long and be too big of a risk. He had made the final decision without her and while it turned out that it had been the only way to make the mission a success, it had taken a lot longer and been a hell of a lot riskier, almost too risky. Which is why they had had to wander for far too long in the cold snow to find this safe house because they had missed their flight window, and now had to spend the night there to rest up before heading back out to do the cleanup and fly back. The screaming in each other's face what the other did wrong only served to have the sexual tension that had been building between them for months snap and break.

Clothes were scattered all around leading to the bed, a lamp and side table had been knocked over, a painting had fallen off the wall, and there was a dent in the headboard from Bucky's metal arm.

Silence filled the house as they slept, their shouting and moans and groans replaced with deep, calm breathing. Outside, the wind was gathering strength, snowflakes frantically dancing in the porchlight. When they fell asleep, the snow was halfway up under the windows, and by dawn it had reached the window sill, the wind packing it tight against the house.

It was still fairly early in the morning when rumbling sounded in the distance. An ominous rumble that quickly grew louder and louder. Bucky was the first to wake from it. He was only disoriented for two seconds before he cursed and leapt off the bed and over to the window. This woke her up and she too scrambled towards the window as the rumbling was almost deafening. Her first thought upon seeing all the snow was that she would crawl her way out of the cabin even if she froze her hands off rather than stay here with that pig-headed super-soldier. But then the roof creaked and the rumbling was right upon them, both looking up and almost shielding themselves as if the roof was about to cave in. And then everything was dark as the moonlight disappeared and the power went, taking with it the light in the bathroom. There was complete silence.

"Well shit," Bucky said, quite fittingly.

She looked over at him and not having had much light to desensitize her eyes, she saw that he was very much naked still, as was she. She was over by the bed in one leap and grabbed the sheets to wrap around herself, leaving Bucky with only a pillow to hide his front.

"I am going to go in there," she nodded her head towards the bathroom, "and by the time I'm out, you better be decent and have found something to light up this place so we can see what we're doing when we try to get someone to help us out of here."

Bucky didn't dare to do anything but nod at her sharp voice and watch as she clumsily fished her phone out of a pocket on the suit on the floor and turned on its flashlight while holding onto the sheets at the same time. When she slammed the bathroom door shut and locked it, he tossed the pillow onto the bed and went to hunt down his own clothes and then see if there were any candles or flashlights lying around.

A little while later, she appeared in the kitchen fully dressed with the top of her Kevlar suit hanging around her hips, black thermal undershirt untucked. Bucky was about to pour freshly brewed coffee into two mugs while wearing his headlamp, but the room was bathed in light and the items they had knocked over in their hurry to get naked the previous night had been put back into place.

"I found the backup generator," he explained, pushing one of the coffee mugs towards her on the counter and then turned off the headlamp and pulled it off. "Good morning."

It was properly morning now too, a sliver of sunlight snuck through the half an inch of the kitchen window that was not covered by snow.

"Good morning, Barnes." She grabbed the offered mug and sniffed it before taking a sip.

"I also found some jerky in the pantry." He pointed to an open bag on the counter. "Nothing fresh, but it's something."

"It will have to do." She reached into the bag and grabbed a few strips. "Have you tried to call Hill?"

"I have," Bucky said. "But the signal is too low to get a call through. I have tried throughout the entire cabin except in the bathroom."

"Satphone?" she asked above the rim of the steaming mug.

"Battery is dead. I was going to fix the charger after I had made coffee."

"The charger isn't working? And why is the battery dead? I thought you charged it yesterday."

"I did charge it yesterday. But there is something wrong with the charger, and it didn't reach a hundred percent and has drained quickly in the cold."

"Okay, you fix that, and I'll try to get through on my phone."

Bucky gave her a look that told her he wasn't surprised that she had to double-check the phone reception before he grabbed his coffee and a handful of jerky and sat down on the couch by the small coffee table. She watched him rummage through the bag next to him, pulling out the satphone's charger and started to wiggle the cord where it was connected to the adapter.

She shook her head in exasperation as she reached for the phone in her back pocket, but stopped, one hand resting on the coffee mug on the counter, the other holding her phone, not able to look away from the super-soldier working. Despite how much she disagreed with his plan the other day and the words she had shouted at him the previous night, despite her need to double-check his findings this morning, even though he infuriated her, she did respect him. For what he'd gone through and how he'd moved on from it. For how he took advantage of what he had been through and used it today. For how smart and quick and capable he was and how he clearly knew how to fix a satphone charger. Still, he was too handsome for his own good and so goddamn good in bed she could still feel him between her legs, and she did not like that.

Glaring at the back of his head, she unlocked her phone. There was indeed no reception, so she grabbed one piece of jerky to chew on while she walked around trying to fill some bars in the top corner icon.

It didn't take her long to have reached every corner of the cabin without having found any signal. She had even tried opening the front door. Thankfully, or maybe not, the snow was packed so hard it didn't fall in on her, but it did nothing to help her phone connect to a cell tower.

"I think the snowstorm might have taken out the nearest towers," she said and slammed the door shut.

"Doesn't matter, because I've got the satphone charging," Bucky said distractedly. "It's searching for a satellite right now."

"Oh good." She walked over and looked down over the back of the couch to the phone in his hands. "We need someone to dig us out, or heaven knows how long we'll be stuck in here."

"Aaaand there's our GPS position, and I'm sending it to F.R.I.D.A.Y. and..." He was typing something real fast, and again she was impressed with his way around modern technology with the speed he was typing. "And she's sending someone to get us out right now. I said it was urgent."

"Good."

"Now we wait."

An awkward silence filled the cabin. The prospect of waiting for possibly hours, had the tension growing. It wasn't exactly a vacation cabin, there was no TV, no books, no games, nothing to pass the time. And since there was no cell reception, there was no streaming or even reading the news either.

She went back to the counter to finish off her coffee, thankful for that keeping her busy for a while, it was still hot enough she could only sip at it. Then she decided to head back into the bedroom to disassemble and reassemble her weapons. But before she got halfway across the floor, Bucky apparently couldn't take the silence anymore.

"About last night," he started.

She stopped short and pulled a face. "Please don't, Barnes."

"Please don't what?"

"Just... Don't."

He stood up and faced her, but she didn't look at him. "Want me to pretend it didn't happen?"

She crossed her arms across her chest defensively and opened her mouth to speak, but couldn't make herself say yes.

"Despite what my behaviour last night says about me, I don't just sleep around for the fun of it. I don't just... Not without... It's been just..." Bucky seemed to be struggling to find the words now. She glanced over at him and saw that he was blushing furiously before sitting down again.

"I don't think that," she found herself reassuring him.

"Good. Because I don't."

Silence filled the cabin again, and she was suddenly hearing the words Bucky hadn't said. She uncrossed her arms and rested her hands on her weapons belt. "I don't either."

Bucky turned around and met her eyes. They stared at each other for what felt like ages, almost daring the other to actually say out loud the words they both realised was true.

"Doll..." Bucky stood up and she took a step backwards, shaking her head slightly. Hurt flashed across his face. "Are you afraid of me? Did I do something wrong? Is that why you're always so angry when I'm around?" She shook her head again and Bucky took a step towards her. She didn't back up this time.

"I'm... I don't know." She screwed her eyes shut, crossing her arms again. From the moment Steve introduced him to the team she had been attracted to him, he had that tall, dark, handsome going for him. But there had been something in his eyes that drew her in more than anything. A flash of softness or kindness or... something, every now and then. Such a contrast to the strength and fearlessness and deadliness he showed when he sparred with Steve or was on a mission. He'd been through so much, but instead of letting it destroy him, he used everything that had made him a deadly assassin and turned it into this force of good.

"Doll... I didn't know?"

She snapped her eyes open, confusion written all over her face. The softness was back in his eyes and she cocked her head, looking at him. "What?"

"I didn't know you felt that way about me."

"I said that out loud?"

"You did... But why..." He took another step closer.

Embarrassment burned her skin, but there was no taking it back. Might as well dive into it. "Why have I behaved like I feel the opposite?"

Bucky nodded.

"Good question." She paused for a moment, chewed the inside of her lip, looking him straight in the eye. "I wasn't planning on falling for anyone. Didn't want to. At least not someone I work so closely with. It's a recipe for disaster in our line of work. And I knew from the start that I would fall for you, you ticked every box. So, I tried hard not to." She sighed. "I failed."

"You've fallen for me?"

She shrugged, but nodded and bit her lip again. "I failed at not falling for you and in my attempt to stay professional and keep my distance, I made you think I hated you."

"I never thought you hated me," Bucky said hurriedly, shaking his head. "Disliked, yes. Hated, no. But I haven't exactly been on my best behaviour either."

"What do you mean?"

"I have a lot of luggage. Most people don't exactly see past my... well, past. But Steve did without question. And then Sam followed. And then everyone else. But it seemed like you didn't. So I closed myself down with you. I think maybe I was a little scared of the same things as you." Bucky took a step closer and if he reached out, he could touch her now. "I'm sorry."

"I'm sorry too."

For a moment, they stared at each other, the air between them thick with emotion. And then, at the same time, they closed the distance. Arms went around the other, lips crashed, bodies pressed against each other. It was just as explosive as the night before, if not more. There was nothing in them holding back anymore. Last night had been almost business-like, just a reaction to different opinions and days and days of hard work and ages of repressed emotions reaching the end of the tether.

She ran her hands through Bucky's hair, revelling in the moan he made as her nails scraped lightly at his scalp. He needed to wash his hair, but she didn't care. She was no better, and he obviously didn't mind days of mission sticking to her skin as he kissed a trail down her chin to her neck. She threw her head back, giving him access and he tasted every inch of skin not covered by her thermal shirt. He kept tugging it down.

"Don't tear it," she said breathlessly, tugging lightly at his hair to warn him.

"Then get it off," he murmured against her skin.

Very reluctantly, she disentangled herself from him, already missing the warmth he radiated and the feel of him against her. Not helped by the whine he made from the loss of her in his arms and his almost stumble after her. She reached down and swiftly pulled the shirt off her head, dropping it to the floor. She took a few steps backwards, towards the bedroom, and nodded towards him. Bucky caught her meaning and tore off his own shirt.

Slowly moving towards and into the bedroom, clothes were shed, leaving a trail, but no furniture was destroyed this time. She had only her sensible black mission bra and underwear left when Bucky slowed down and stared as if hypnotized as she unclasped the bra behind her, let the straps fall from her shoulders, her arms keeping it in place. Then, it fell to the ground. Sure, he had seen her naked the previous night, but Bucky hadn't allowed himself to look then. He did now, etching every curve and line and scar and freckle into memory as he walked slowly towards her.

She tried to not feel self-conscious and managed for a few seconds, but then she felt heat bloom inside her and she looked down at her feet, arms folding across her chest. The way he was behaving and the way he was looking at her was so different from what she was used to, it was making all kinds of feelings bubble up inside her. Bucky shook his head and closed the distance.

She looked up at him.

"Do you have any idea how beautiful you are?" he said and weaved his fingers through her hair and ghosted his lips to hers before pulling back just enough to whisper against her lips. "I could stare at you forever, doll." Her arms immediately went up around his shoulders and she pressed her lips to his. He closed the space between them, let her feel how much he enjoyed the view of her. She moaned against him, pressing her hips against his and pulled him back towards the bed, teeth clashing, until she bumped her legs against the edge of it and lost her balance. Bucky tried to steady her with his arms around her waist, but she toppled backwards pulling him with her. He managed to brace himself so he didn't knock the wind out of her, and rolled to the side, chuckling.

"Sorry," she said.

But he just shook his head and went for her lips again. He just couldn't keep off her, now that he knew what kissing her properly was like, knew that she felt for him the same way he felt for her. Knew that both their hostility had been just a protective wall they had put up.

In a tangle of arms and legs, they scrambled up the bed. Bucky hovered above her, kissing down her neck, until she spread her legs, laid them around his waist and pulled him down. She gasped at just how hard he was already and how warm everything suddenly became, and began grinding against him. Bucky faltered a little, closing his eyes. Even if it had been less than twenty-four hours since they'd had sex, it didn't feel the same at all. He was sure he was going to come in seconds if she didn't stop already, and no matter how good that would feel right now, he did not want that embarrassment hanging over his head.

"You gotta stop doing that, sweetheart," he whispered against her shoulder. She halted immediately, pulling away slightly, but before she could even ask, he raised his head to look down at her. "You're going to make me come."

Heat flashed across her face, but she pushed her hips up, moving slowly against him. "Get my less than sexy practical underwear off then, so we can do it right."

Bucky's eyes flashed with hunger as he nearly ripped it off and made quick work of his own. "I'll do you right."

Steve and Natasha sat warm and snug in the Quinjet, surveying the very white landscape. A few pine trees were the only colour breaking up the blinding white. That and the suit they had borrowed from Tony to melt the snow around the cabin their friends were stuck in.

"I'm so glad we don't have to dig them out," Natasha commented.

"Yeah," Steve agreed. "It has been a real big avalanche."

"We would have been shovelling for days..."

The repulsors were doing a quick job of it, melting everything to water and then steam. They didn't want to flood the cabin. It almost looked like the cabin was on fire.

But a few minutes later, the suit lowered its arms and turned around to face the Quinjet, awaiting orders.

Steve pressed his earpiece. "You can come back in, thank you."

"I'll never get over how you speak to them like they're sentient." Natasha grinned at him, before hitting the button to open the hatch and let the suit in.

"They're just a brain cell away, and they do behave eerily lifelike." He stood up and pulled on a pair of gloves and donned the shield.

"What do you need that for?"

"I'm surprised they're not out already. They must have noticed the snow melting away. So... Just in case."

She considered him and then activated her Bites.

They jumped out of the Quinjet and approached the cabin a bit cautiously and then stopped by the front door. Steve cocked his head to try to listen.

"It's quiet inside."

"I'd expect them to be at each other's throats by now, having been cooped up together for so long." Natasha got the door unlocked and glanced at Steve. He grabbed the shield and held it in front of him, then nodded. Natasha wrenched the door open and Steve jumped in front and took one large step over the threshold, taking in the room.

Nothing. No one.

He stepped further in, Natasha following. "Where the hell are they?"

They both surveyed the room, taking in every detail. A strange noise came from behind the only other door in the cabin and Natasha nodded towards it. Again, Steve held the shield up and Natasha wrenched the door open. Steve then jumped into the opening, stood frozen for one single second, shouted "MY EYES" and scrambled away with his eyes screwed shut.

"What the hell?" someone said from inside.

Natasha poked her head past the door and looked inside, and what she saw made a huge grin spread across her lips.

On the bed, were two obviously naked people who had just scrambled apart, Bucky frantically trying to pull a blanket up to cover them. Skin glistening, bushy hair, puffy lips, there was no doubt to what Natasha and Steve had just interrupted.

"Guess it wasn't such a hurry after all," Natasha said, trying hard not to laugh. "Get dressed." And she closed the door, laughing.

[leverage-ot3]

notable moments from The Second David Job

leverage 1.13

parker AND eliot were both using lil flip notepads when they were casing the museum

- - - - -

they were apart for three months. THREE!!! MONTHS!!!

- - - - -

the whole scene where parker, hardison, eliot and sophie are casing the place and just narrowly missing each other until it all blows up in their faces? BIG doctor who vibes from the episode where donna and the doctor keep barely missing each other until they see each other through the windows and get caught

- - - - -

aww the last dammit hardison of the season

- - - - -

(Hardison drops his helmet as he rounds a corner, followed by two guards)

Hardison (to Eliot): Help me.

Eliot: I got you.

Hardison: Help me, help me!

(Eliot grabs Hardison’s arm and flips him, then gestures to the other guards)

Eliot: I got it.

Eliot: All right, check one floor up. I think I saw another guy dressed just like this one.

Guard: Got it.

Guard 5: Let’s go.

Eliot: Move! (pushes Hardison into the elevator)

Hardison: I'm gonna kick your butt.

Eliot (pushes Hardison): Stand over there!

Hardison: I'm gonna kick your butt

🥰 chaotic boyfriends 🥰

- - - - -

(Sophie walks toward the doors. Parker drops down in front of her)

Parker: Oh! W- Where did you --

Parker: Run now. Talk later

- - - - -

sophie took off her heels to run

- - - - -

okay but I NEED THAT SCENE OF ELIOT, HARDISON, AND PARKER SQUISHED INTO THE BACK SEAT OF NATE’S CAR AS THEY SPEED AWAY, HAVING NOT SEEN EACH OTHER FOR THE PAST THREE MONTHS

- - - - -

Hardison: How'd you know we'd be there?

Nate: Last week before the exhibit opens, security almost in place, but not fully staffed. Best time to case the joint. Plus, I did chase all of you at one point or another.

- - - - -

Eliot: Is she in on this?

Sophie: "She" can hear you, okay?

Hardison: Wait a minute. There is no "this," Eliot.

Parker: Sophie did come back for me.

(Nate walks over to the table, which is covered in plans)

Eliot: Wouldn't have had to if she wouldn't have lied to you.

Hardison: No calls for three months. I don't need you people.

Parker: What do you mean, you don’t need us?

Sophie: I’m sorry, I seem to remember a certain job with horses where I backed your play, actually.

Eliot: I don't care! You don't con your crew!

(the four of them begin arguing, talking over each other. Nate whistles to get their attention)

parker immediately backing sophie up? we love a trusting daughter

hardison acting all dismissive and parker IMMEDIATELY calling him out? amazing

eliot having trust issues? we’re sad to see it but not surprised at all lol

- - - - -

Nate: Glen-Reeder security system here.

Parker: And that's not the worst of it. (walks over to table)

Nate: Hmm?

Parker: The Davids are under bulletproof glass on a motion-Detector pad.

Nate: Really?

(the others join them, Nate takes a step back)

Parker: Mm-Hmm.

Sophie: Environmentally sealed…

Nate: Really.

Sophie: …kept at a constant temperature and humidity in the case. I saw them working on the airflow.

(Nate walks away, no one notices)

THE FAMILY BACK TOGETHER AGAIN

- - - - -

Nate: Why'd you come back? We agreed to scatter for six months. All of you–all of you—made an amateur move being there.

Parker: It's too hard to leave a job undone. It's like an itch.

Hardison: I put a lot of work into us, into that office. It was like my second home. I blew up my second home.

Eliot: As annoying as you people are, I quit this crew when I quit this crew. Nobody makes me leave.

Sophie: I just, I really wanted to hurt Sterling.

THEYRE A FAMILY, YOUR HONOR

- - - - -

eliot smiled when nate said he taunted them bc:

1. fuck with sterling at all costs,

2. typical nate, and

3. he MISSED THIS

ALSO

hardison and sophie look exhausted and annoyed when nate said he told them he was going to steal it. meanwhile, parker and eliot fucking smile because yeah, get on their level. they Get It™

- - - - -

the team sitting around the table like old times ,,,

ALSO hardison’s worktable tho,,, half eaten bag of chips, empty bottle of orange soda, mini basketball, etc. we love to see how this man works

- - - - -

Sophie: Hey, I think the roof's the way in, but it looks like they've rigged alarm sensors to the skylights.

Parker: I can get around those.

Eliot: Really? And end up on one of the new 20 cameras they got down there from our last little trip to the basement?

Parker: That was fun.

Hardison: Yeah. Could we talk about that?

Parker: Talk about what?

hardison: can we talk about the kiss or ???

parker and eliot are sitting next to each other :)

also eliot is wearing flannel now and we love to see it

- - - - -

Eliot: How'd we miss that?

Nate: Grifter, hitter, hacker, thief. You were all trying to solve your version of the crime instead of just trying to solve the crime. There was a reason we worked together.

- - - - -

Parker: What about Maggie?

parker likes maggie

+

Parker: Okay, look, you always have a plan "b," right? So, fine. Without Maggie, what's the plan "b"?

MASTERMIND PARKER IN SEASON ONE

- - - - -

Nate: You know, I had to ask her out 10 times before we even got a coffee --

Eliot: Coffee? I would love to. Yeah. What time--? In an hour? I, yeah, I would love to. Let me write down where you want to go. I know exactly where that place is at. All right. I'm looking forward to it. (hangs up)

Nate: Yeah, all right -- No.

Eliot: She probably just really wants some hot coffee.

Nate: Shut up!

Eliot: It's not like a date. (pulls his hair back)

Nate: Are you kidding me? You're fixing your hair?

Eliot: Because I’m playing the professor Sinclair dude!

maggie’s thirst + nate ready to die LMFAO

- - - - -

parker, hardison and sophie watching the button cam footage like a soap opera (sophie is literally eating gummy bears lmfao)

- - - - -

(Parker, Eliot and Hardison sit on the stairs as Maggie and Nate stand in the dining room, arguing)

Eliot: I feel used.

lmao poor eliot. although we love to see the ot3 sitting together as a unit

- - - - -

eliot using a tight alias and then using his real phone number? big dumbass energy

- - - - -

Nate: So we replace the rebar, reinforce the concrete, with any luck, they'll never know what hit 'em. And that, that's the plan.

Maggie: You actually expect this to work?

Nate: Um…

Hardison: No, no, you're supposed to say, "wow. That's just crazy enough to work."

Sophie: Incredibly, chance does seem to bend itself to his bizarre machinations.

Parker (whispers): That's his superpower. (smells Maggie)

in this house we love and respect maggie

also dnjsjsjjdnsn under the cork boards there are two (2) big cases of orange soda and beer for eliot

+ now parker is wearing a very pretty flannel that I want

- - - - -

Maggie: I have to check museum inventory.

Nate: Oh. Easy.

(Nate looks at Hardison, who types on a laptop, then shows monitor to Maggie)

Maggie: This is confidential. (takes laptop) You're not reading my e-mails, are you?

Hardison: No. No.

(Maggie looks down at the laptop. Hardison nods to Nate while she’s not looking)

LMFAO

- - - - -

Sophie: Okay, why don't you run up to him? Being just a little bit out of breath, it changes the speech rhythms—

[Blackpoole Gallery]

Sophie: --makes it harder to detect a lie.

(Maggie passes Parker, taking Lloyd’s phone, and starts to run)

Maggie: Lloyd!

[Mansion Dining Room]

Hardison: See? Like that right there. It's informative.

Eliot: You learn and you con

it’s true, your honor

- - - - -

Nate: Okay. What's he found?

Hardison: Oh. Well, looky here. Dr. Ernst Volk, University of Berlin, dead. Dr. Schliemann, London museum, dead. Oh. Oh, and also the three guys that actually discovered the tomb. Eliot, what does that say?

Eliot: It says "dead."

Hardison: D-E-D, dead, baby.

Eliot and Nate: D-E-A-D.

Hardison: I-I know how to-- I was throwing a little style on it, Just a little bit, a little style. I know how to spell "dead," damn it. I can steal a bank, I can spell "dead. (annoyedly drinks orange soda)

give him a break pls

- - - - -

Sophie: Wrap it up now, Maggie. You're doing great.

THEY HAVE CHEMISTRY

john rogers said that they had a fling in canon (I’m thinking during sophie’s absence in season two) and bless his soul for giving that to us

- - - - -

Eliot: You need something?

Sophie: I was just trying to make myself useful.

Eliot: Yeah, well, last time you tried that, we had to blow up the office.

Sophie: That's not fair.

Eliot: I was just getting used to it.

Sophie: What? Having an office?

Eliot: Being part of a team.

Sophie: Look, I didn't mean, you know, it wasn't supposed to go down like that.

(Parker walks in and tosses a bag on the floor near Eliot)

Parker: What's going on?

Eliot: Sophie here was just trying to apologize.

(Hardison carries the painting into the room)

Sophie: No, I wasn't.

Parker: She tried that with me earlier. She kind of sucks at it.

Eliot: A little bit.

Hardison: Oh, did she give you the speech about how we're thieves and about how this is what thieves do and if we were in her shoes, we'd have done the same thing?

Eliot: No, I think she was just getting to that part.

(Eliot puts the part he was working on down and stands up)

Eliot: You apologized to him first, huh? Why am I last?

Sophie: I wasn't apologizing. I...

Eliot: That's the problem.

Sophie: I just wanted to see if w-we… we were all okay with each other.

Eliot: Okay. There it is.

Parker: I forgive you.

Hardison: Apology accepted.

Eliot: Yeah.

they give sophie shit but they still love her

also eliot is such a sap he misses the office and even admits that he liked having a team what a SOFTIE

- - - - -

Geary: Pictures have been distributed. We're scanning every guest that comes into the museum.

Sterling: Eliot Spencer?

Geary: Eliot Spencer, (referencing files) wanted in five countries, including Myanmar—

(Eliot walks behind Geary and Sterling, pausing to listen for a moment as they walk away from him)

Geary: --which is offering a half-million-dollar bounty on his head.

Sterling: Bringing Spencer to justice and getting paid for it? It's icing on the cake.

(Geary and Sterling get into an elevator)

[Museum Lobby]

(Geary and Sterling walk out of the elevator)

Sterling: Parker?

Geary: Parker. Wanted in nine countries, including Brazil and Yemen.

Sterling: Yeah, tough choice. I'll have to flip a coin.

(Parker is working in the gift shop of the lobby, watching them walk by)

Sterling: How about Sophie Devereaux?

Geary: England, France, Spain, Luxembourg -- Europe, basically.

Sterling: France. Wonderful shopping, horrifying prisons.

(they walk past Sophie, who stifles a laugh)

[Mechanical Room]

(Hardison turns on a light on his hat, opening a panel and attaching clips)

Sterling: Alec Hardison.

Geary: Well, he better not show his face in Iceland

I LOVED THIS MONTAGE

also we love to learn more about the team

- - - - -

on hardison’s phone when it shows their synchronized countdowns, he has himself down as “big h”

- - - - -

Ian: Conspiracy to commit robbery is what, five years? Catching him in the act, 20.

- - - - -

nate rappelled in this one!

- - - - -

nate snatching the gun right out of blackpool’s hand? eliot taught him that and you CANNOT change my mind.

- - - - -

Ian: Maggie!

(Ian walks over to Maggie, followed by Nate and Sterling)

Ian: Well, you understand –

(Maggie punches Ian in the face. He falls to the floor)

Maggie: Screw therapy. That felt really good. (walks away)

we stan a QUEEN

- - - - -

Sterling: Of course, you know your entire plan depended on me being a self-serving, utter bastard.

Nate: Hmm. Yeah, that's a stretch.

(Nate hands Sterling the gun and heads for the door)

Sterling: I'll call you when it's done.

Nate: You do that

- - - - -

(the team stands in a circle, dressed for travelling)

Nate: Thank you, all of you. You surprised me.

Eliot: We had a good run.

Hardison: It's a good time to move on.

Parker: I'm going somewhere... else.

Sophie: A fresh start.

Nate: We made a difference. Remember that.

Hardison (to Parker): Where you going?

Parker: Let's see how hard you look.

(the team separates reluctantly, each going a different direction. They all pause for a long moment, then the screen goes to black)

parker and hardison are still cute, parker is about to cry, hardison and eliot look very sad and almost tearing up, and sophie is actually crying

also hardison was the last one to turn around and that’s so in character it hurts my heart

+ the ot3 were each wearing leather jackets (plus eliot wearing a hoodie underneath = bix2)

I hate the scenes when they split up and the producers said that they ended every season as if that was final anD B O Y IF I HAD TO WATCH THAT AND HAVE IT BE THE END I WOULD HAVE R I O T E D

[thebeethathums]

Observers - 48

Pairing: Sherlock Holmes x Reader

A/N: Annnnddd Sherly ruins the moment unintentionally... because he's Sherly.

The bed seemed terribly empty when Sherlock woke up and you were missing, for a while by the coolness of the bedding next to him. He rolled out of it to find all his clothes except for his shirt neatly folded on the bedside table and pulled them on before wandering out to the living room. He couldn’t help but grin when he saw you in front of your easel fully dressed in the clothes from the night before, your hair pulled back, and a fat brush in hand. He watched you work on your new painting, sitting down in your chair since you didn’t seem aware of the fact that he was awake. It was the same canvas from the night before but you had incorporated both his and your handprints from his experiment into it, making it more abstract than it had been originally. From the amount of work you’d done at this level of concentration, you had to have been up at least a few hours if not longer, meaning his experiment was a success. You reached for a tube of paint absentmindedly, having used all that you’d set out of that color, and sighed when you found it empty. You scrunched up your face as you turned with the intent to see if you had another tube stashed away somewhere and startled when you saw Sherlock in your chair, offering him a small nervous smile, “I’m sorry, Sherlock, I didn’t notice you were up… about your shirt… I don’t think I’ll be able to get the paint out. I’ll replace it, but you should probably go put on another before John gets home.” He could tell something was off but not what, so he simply stated, “You’re painting again.” You didn’t even bother to scold him for pointing out the obvious, turning to look at your painting with a tiny smile, “Yes. I just woke up and felt like doing so… That hasn’t happened in a while.”

Sherlock got the smuggest of smug looks on his face, “My experiment was a success. The minds of average people are so easily distracted by the physical.” You froze in your examination of your painting, an unsettling chill running through you, “What?” Overly proud of himself and cocky as all hell, he missed the slight hint of unease in your voice, “I hypothesized that reassociating the act of painting with something of a positive nature that overloaded the senses would override the negative effects of your past experiences. From your success this morning, the intense physical contact of an affirming nature overruled the issues plaguing you before- in effect resetting your simplistic mind to allow you to paint again. I suppose there are benefits to having a normal brain.” “So this was all part of your experiment?” you queried, your voice dangerously quiet. “Of course.”   Your face fell for a moment before you composed yourself and then announced, “You should go. John will be back from Amy’s soon.”

It was more evident that something was wrong now given the demanding edge to your voice but, as usual, that was as far as he got- if you didn’t want him to know your thoughts then he wouldn’t know them. It bothered him that he could only ascertain that you were upset but not why and since it obviously wasn’t over being able to paint again, as that was a good thing, he decided it must be about your friend. Of course, he was wrong but what can you do? He got up to leave because you were right- John would be home soon- and he still didn’t do the whole comforting thing, especially not when you wanted him out. You moved back to your painting, distracting yourself by working on one of the more detailed corners as you mumbled, “Don’t forget your violin.” Once he'd gone, you stopped, your jaw clenching in thought, and decided to try and clear your head by taking a shower to get rid of the paint on your skin reminding you of the night before. When you’d woken up that morning you weren’t sure how to act, you felt guilty about his ruined shirt, and then you began to question the whole thing. You’d distracted yourself by painting since that was what had woken you up in the first place but when he’d got up and said what he said- all the doubts came rushing back. You scolded yourself as the water ran down your skin, you knew he was just curious and that it wouldn’t be anything more. He’d been using you to figure out another aspect of human behavior, it was your fault for getting caught up in it since you’d know that from the start. You could hardly be mad at him for suddenly catching more feelings than either of your intended. You hadn’t even wanted a relationship… when had that changed? When did you start wanting more? You considered it for a moment, it wasn’t as though he didn’t care… he had helped you with your painting even if the how hadn’t been exactly what you’d expected. But then again, it may have been just so that he didn’t have to go through the tedious task of getting you out of work every time he wanted something from you. Maybe John had been right- you weren’t an experiment and letting him treat you as such was messing you up. Clean and dressed, you looked over your apartment, entirely conflicted, and debated what you should do next. You could lie on the floor and think but that didn’t sound appealing at all- your thoughts were too jumbled. You could let the need to be destructive that was creeping into your chest take over but that was hardly productive or helpful- not to mention you’d have to clean up later. There was only one other option and out of the three it seemed the best- you could paint and lose yourself in it... might as well put the results of Sherlock’s ‘experiment’ to good use. You cranked up some music on your stereo system to a ‘don’t disturb me’ level, a painting playlist of random unrelated songs that you liked, set up a new palette after washing your brushes and getting new water, and then set aside the painting you’d been working on in favor of a blank white canvas. Best not to think about how that one was made, you reasoned as you mixed a starting color. You let yourself get lost in the action, spreading bold strokes of reds and yellows over the surface as you let out all the emotions you’d been holding inside for so long. John broke into a wide grin when he came home and heard your odd choice in music, knowing it meant you were painting again as he climbed the stairs to his flat. Sherlock was spread out on the couch as usual, deep in thought, and John rolled his eyes as he went into the kitchen. Your music shut off just before noon, when your alarm went off the remind you that you had to go to work, and John came down to see how you were doing just as you were locking the door to your flat, “How’s the painting going, Squeak?” You sighed, “Good I suppose. Certainly better then it has been.” He stopped you when you went to leave, pushing the hair escaping your bun behind your ear, “What’s the matter, (F/n)? That’s a good thing, isn’t it? You should be happy.” You forced a small grin, “I am, Johnny. I’ve just got a lot on my mind is all.” “Like what?” You chuckled, removing yourself from his grasp, “Like work. I’ve gotta go.” He frowned as you left, you should have been ecstatic about being able to paint again...what was so pressing in your mind that it had stolen the wind from your sails? Climbing the stairs again, he went to see if Sherlock knew anything, reaching for the half-full mug of coffee next to him to get his attention. Sherlock’s eyes snapped open to glare at him for trying to touch his mug, effectively halting John's advance, “What?” “Do you have any idea what’s got (F/n) looking so troubled?” “Not in the slightest.” John huffed, unconvinced but unwilling to press, and plopped down in his chair as Sherlock went back to thinking. He’d enjoyed the night before, snippets of it kept replaying in his mind, and he’d never slept better but, for some reason, he couldn’t shake what had happened when he’d woken up. Social conventions and his study of human behavior on the subject told him that the thoughtless masses determined the morning after to be a complex moment. He didn’t understand why. It seemed to him that it could go one of two ways: your partner could slip away before it was light and never call or they could remain and continue the relationship. He’d stayed. Simple. So why had you been so nervous? He supposed it had something to do with your past as you were displaying signs of distress over something as unimportant as the state of his shirt but then you’d also told him to leave- a complete turn around from the night before when you suggested he shower with you. He’d done everything right and yet something was wrong. He was missing something… it had to be some odd facet of human behavior that he hadn’t considered. The only question was which one…

Tags <3:

@team-free-sherlock @multifandom-ramblings @madshelily @severusminerva @yes-but-theyre-my-dorks @smitemewiththysherlock @not-fandom-addicted @unknownwonder @deducingdevil @aviien @mrsfrankensteinsworld​ @lolamurphy @bakerstreethound @musical-doll-x @protectteamfreewill @delightful-pirate @lilcutekittykat @broke-and-overwhelmed @adri1ii @turtle-at-the-disco @fanfictionsilove @chasedbyhowlingwolves @thorkyrie-rights

[dogglefoxkvk]

My theories on It's Your Turn to Die/Kimi ga Shine

First and foremost, I don't know how to create a read more, so spoiler alert for those who are not caught up.

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Secondly, I did *not* expect androids to be involved in this at all when I first started enjoying this game and that has completely changed my thoughts on it.

Theory 1

Okay, so I am pretty sure everyone involved is an android and it's another simulation.

"But, Kat, they bled that proves that they arent!"

Ehh not necessarily. We've proven that AI don't have to recognize that theyre AI, but we were only shown an "outdated" model. If we operate under the assumption that models continue updating, then it's not impossible that the Organization can just fill the artificial bodies with liquid similar to blood and other fluids.

First look at Miley. I am not convinced she's not an AI. All that was established when Sara and Keiji were looking for Gin was that she replaced the doll. Of course she had to because the AI would be much more sophisticated than the glorified Barbie that was the doll the squad put together. If she is an AI, she bled when Kai hit her.

Second, Kai himself. How are we sure he's human? He calls Gashu father as well. Rio Ranger was also shown to call Gashu father. Kai was part of the Organization and my guess is he was supposed to end up as a floor master, but the emotions they "installed" didn't end up where they wanted. Therefore, they utilized the skills of the other AI we have seen by having Kai protect the Chiduins [who are clearly important in the Organization]. This is how we get to him betraying the Organization and landing him in the game in the first place as punishment. We see him "bleed" as well.

Further evidence to support this is the tidbit with Safalin and Ranger/Laizer. They didnt like when Laizer felt too many conflicting emotions so they got rid of some. My bet is Mr. Chiduin suggested the other use for Kai, thus keeping him "intact." They usually like when the AI they use for the floormasters are a little chaotic, just one or two notches away from being quite human.

Let's also remember where we first meet Jou and Sara. Outside their school, yes, but it's Pitch. Black. outside. Why are they at school so late? Jou even mentions this asking if it's for a club. There's no resolution to that question.

The first thing I thought when I saw the opening scene was why are they there so late. I know there are clubs after school, but usually dont those only go as late as 7pm? I just dont find it realistic for schools requiring children stay til it's well past sunset.

As for evidence for it still being a simulation other than everyone being an AI are the victim videos. One of the participants mentions Sara by name which is odd. I wonder if in a previous simulation Sara AI was paired with that one and then they decided to get Jou in on it.

Also the statement that Sara was knocked out in the 2nd Main Game and the vision of Sara holding and mourning Sou give credence to this theory. There's also the memories Sou/Shin had of himself dying. I'm wondering if the memories are like save states and somehow bled iknto each other since he got hit of the head.

Not to mention the whole Shin/Sou dynamic where Sou says that literally someone else was speaking to him that he "got rid of." My theory is that it really was another Shin and the Sou we are familiar with killed him.

Plus it'd just be a good tragic end if none of it were real and they were not actaully able to escape at all coupled with the knowledge that they have been helping the Organization perfect their game this whole time.

Theory 2

The Chiduins are the masterminds behind the entire idea, with Sara being fully involved.

Now I dont have a ton of evidence to support this, but really I just think it'd be fun. Here's how I would have it go down.

This is still a simulation. Sara is watching the simulations along with other members of the Organization. She is watching to have the best chance of survival and wondering hownto act and what paths to take for the sure fire way to victory. Shes already adept at covering up her family's criminal ties as her "friends" Jou and Ryoko know nothing of it.

Side note, I think it's interesting that Sara never tells Joe that she loves him back only that hes her best friend.

Anyways, the reveal during the final game would be so juicy. Like I said I dont really see this theory as anything but a fun what if.

[mavwrekmarketing]

The myth of Paul Ryan is in serious trouble. This was likely inevitable, but it certainly is on stark display in the debate among Republicans over his Ryancare bill, which was supposed to be the repeal and replace Obamacare answer to all conservatives dreams. Quite obviously, Ryans bill fell far short of this lofty goal. It is currently being savaged from all sides within the Republican caucus alone. But beyond the bills likely failure, the myth surrounding Ryan is also on life support.

The Ryan myth began with a book about three Republican young guns who were the best and the brightest of their generation and who seemed destined for leadership positions within the party. Ryan was lauded along with Eric Cantor and Kevin McCarthy as the future of the Republican Party, but importantly this was before the Tea Party phenomenon. The phrase young guns itself projects a certain cowboy swagger, a manly Reaganesque image of a gun-totin fighter for the cause. But again, that was before the Tea Party was launched. Nowadays, Ryan doesnt seem to have quite the swagger of a young gun anymore, because that role has been co-opted by the Tea Partiers themselves.

But the Ryan myth didnt end there. Ryan was supposed to be the wonkiest of the wonky, a real numbers guy who understood all the details and could call them up from memory with ease a counterpart to Bill Clintons wonkiness, in a lot of ways. Before he took the reins of the House, he was in charge of the Republicans efforts to hammer the federal budget into their preferred conservative mold. The budgets he came up with were Draconian in their treatment of the poor, but not a whole lot of people noticed because the House budget bills were routinely ignored by the Senate. Ryan won kudos from within his own party, but didnt actually influence policy all that much.

This was the perfect position for the Ryan myth to thrive. Without any real-world consequences, Ryan was held up to be a genius at putting the numbers together in an orthodox conservative fashion. Nobody complained much, because nobody was really affected by Ryans dream budgets, to put it another way.

But then the Tea Partiers essentially forced Speaker of the House John Boehner to step aside. Boehner had tried herding these particular cats without much success, and eventually he got tired of beating his head against the Tea Partys brick wall. The budget negotiations had broken down multiple times in spectacular fashion (see: fiscal cliff, government shutdown) because the Tea Partiers refused to ever budge one tiny inch on their outlandish demands. It was their way or the highway, and eventually Boehner chose the highway all the way back home to Ohio.

Paul Ryan was then very reluctantly drafted to take Boehners place. He really didnt want the job, but all the other House Republicans told him he was the only possible person who could get things done in the House. He was needed by his party, so eventually he (still very reluctantly) stepped up.

Since that time, the House has not noticeably gotten any more productive. But also since that time, they havent had very many public intraparty battles, by design. Ryan began his tenure by strongarming everyone into kicking all the big budget decisions far down the road after the 2016 elections, in other words. This avoided any contentious Tea Party revolts during the campaign, and in that respect it worked perfectly. That was then, but now all those deadlines are beginning to loom once again. And the Tea Party problem hasnt gone away in the meantime (although they did re-brand themselves the Freedom Caucus for some inexplicable reason).

What this means is that 2017 is going to see a return to the same old knife fights within the Republican caucus. The debt ceiling is going to have to be raised, the budget is going to have to be voted on, and on top of that Republicans are itching to reform the tax code (which, of course, is a euphemism for give enormous tax cuts to the wealthiest of the wealthy, once again).

The Ryan myth was that he was the knight in shining armor who was going to be able to get all Republicans to agree on actual bills (with actual numbers), for the good of the party and for the betterment of the conservative agenda. He was the uber-wonk. He could reach out to the Tea Party faction and convince them to get with the Ryan program. That myth is soon going to be revealed to be nothing more than a fantasy.

The entire Ryancare fiasco is informative. Ryan put out his favored bill, and fully expected Republicans to fall into line behind him, while he bravely fought off the slings and arrows from the Democrats. That was the plan, at any rate. They were going to rush the bill through both houses with lightning speed, and prove to the country that they were incredibly capable of governing, now that they had a Republican in the White House. It has only been a week and a half since the bill was publicly unveiled, and already Ryancare is in deep trouble within his own Republican ranks.

Ryancare is being attacked by the Tea Partiers (for not being sufficiently cruel to the poor) and by moderate Republicans (for already being too obviously cruel to the poor). Ryan may not even be able to scrape up enough votes to pass the bill in the House, and even if he does manage that Herculean feat, it has already been pronounced dead on arrival in the Senate by Republicans. Ryan, so far, is refusing to change his bill in any meaningful way, but the opposition from both the far right and the center within his party means that any possible meaningful shift in the bill is going to please one group while further disappointing the other. If it was just the Tea Partiers grousing, Ryan might have some room for compromise, but thats not the case.

Somewhere, John Boehner is laughing. Because this is exactly the sort of thing which so frustrated him. The competing demands by the various GOP factions are impossible, at times, to reconcile. And remember, Ryancare is a bill without an obvious deadline to meet on the calendar. The only pressure to pass the bill comes from Republicans own political needs. There is no date when Social Security checks are going to stop being mailed if the bill doesnt pass, in other words. The situation (and the time pressure) is entirely self-imposed by Ryan and the Republicans.

What all this means is that Ryancare probably wont pass, at least not in anything like its current form. But what does all this disarray mean for the upcoming budget fights? If Ryancare goes down in flames, the conservative media and the Tea Partiers are all going to be patting themselves on the back in a big way. Theyre already personally demonizing Ryan in the same fashion they used to treat Boehner. But the upcoming legislative fights do actually have deadlines attached.

When a bill simply must be passed (as with the debt ceiling, for instance), Ryans going to have only one route left open to him the same route Boehner routinely took. Ryan will have to allow the Tea Partiers to make as much noise as they want for a period of time, but then hes going to eventually have to sit down with persuadable Democrats in an effort to pass a bill. If Ryans own caucus wont back him up, then hes got to cross the aisle to get the votes. This will give Nancy Pelosi the same power she regularly wielded with Boehner, the power to strip the most odious parts of the Republican bill away before a single Democrat would vote for it. Which, in a feedback loop, will further enrage the Tea Partiers.

Ryan (and, to a lesser extent, Mitch McConnell) will be held up as a traitor to the conservative cause for backing down. This is the point where the Ryan myth will lie in tatters on the floor of the House. For all his supposed wonkiness, Ryan still wont be able to get the Tea Partiers to see any sort of reason. If theyve already defeated him once, over Ryancare, then theyre only going to see themselves as stronger for the upcoming fights. Which will make Ryans position weaker. Which, again, was exactly where John Boehner regularly found himself.

Of the three supposed young guns, Ryan is the only real success story (so far). Eric Cantor was primaried out of his congressional seat by a Tea Partier. Kevin McCarthy was briefly considered for the job Ryans now doing, but that only lasted about fifteen minutes. Whats truly ironic is that the image of the young guns was that of outsiders challenging their party to come up with a youthful and modern approach to conservatism. But now Ryans on the inside looking out at the Tea Partiers storming his castle. Ryans mythical brand of radicalism has been supplanted by the Tea Partys truly radical attitudes towards governing.

The failure of Ryancare is going to be momentous, because it not only will be a massive disappointment to Republicans who love to hate Obamacare, but also because it will be a harbinger for future congressional battles to come. If Ryancare comes to a disastrous end, one has to wonder how much longer Paul Ryan will be able to keep his speakership. Call it the Ryan myth smacking head-on into the Tea Party reality.

Chris Weigant blogs at:

Follow Chris on Twitter: @ChrisWeigant

Read more: http://ift.tt/2mS56RL

 The post The Ryan Myth Is In Big Trouble appeared first on MavWrek Marketing by Jason

http://ift.tt/2m58KZF

[viralhottopics]

The Ryan Myth Is In Big Trouble

The myth of Paul Ryan is in serious trouble. This was likely inevitable, but it certainly is on stark display in the debate among Republicans over his Ryancare bill, which was supposed to be the repeal and replace Obamacare answer to all conservatives dreams. Quite obviously, Ryans bill fell far short of this lofty goal. It is currently being savaged from all sides within the Republican caucus alone. But beyond the bills likely failure, the myth surrounding Ryan is also on life support.

The Ryan myth began with a book about three Republican young guns who were the best and the brightest of their generation and who seemed destined for leadership positions within the party. Ryan was lauded along with Eric Cantor and Kevin McCarthy as the future of the Republican Party, but importantly this was before the Tea Party phenomenon. The phrase young guns itself projects a certain cowboy swagger, a manly Reaganesque image of a gun-totin fighter for the cause. But again, that was before the Tea Party was launched. Nowadays, Ryan doesnt seem to have quite the swagger of a young gun anymore, because that role has been co-opted by the Tea Partiers themselves.

But the Ryan myth didnt end there. Ryan was supposed to be the wonkiest of the wonky, a real numbers guy who understood all the details and could call them up from memory with ease a counterpart to Bill Clintons wonkiness, in a lot of ways. Before he took the reins of the House, he was in charge of the Republicans efforts to hammer the federal budget into their preferred conservative mold. The budgets he came up with were Draconian in their treatment of the poor, but not a whole lot of people noticed because the House budget bills were routinely ignored by the Senate. Ryan won kudos from within his own party, but didnt actually influence policy all that much.

This was the perfect position for the Ryan myth to thrive. Without any real-world consequences, Ryan was held up to be a genius at putting the numbers together in an orthodox conservative fashion. Nobody complained much, because nobody was really affected by Ryans dream budgets, to put it another way.

But then the Tea Partiers essentially forced Speaker of the House John Boehner to step aside. Boehner had tried herding these particular cats without much success, and eventually he got tired of beating his head against the Tea Partys brick wall. The budget negotiations had broken down multiple times in spectacular fashion (see: fiscal cliff, government shutdown) because the Tea Partiers refused to ever budge one tiny inch on their outlandish demands. It was their way or the highway, and eventually Boehner chose the highway all the way back home to Ohio.

Paul Ryan was then very reluctantly drafted to take Boehners place. He really didnt want the job, but all the other House Republicans told him he was the only possible person who could get things done in the House. He was needed by his party, so eventually he (still very reluctantly) stepped up.

Since that time, the House has not noticeably gotten any more productive. But also since that time, they havent had very many public intraparty battles, by design. Ryan began his tenure by strongarming everyone into kicking all the big budget decisions far down the road after the 2016 elections, in other words. This avoided any contentious Tea Party revolts during the campaign, and in that respect it worked perfectly. That was then, but now all those deadlines are beginning to loom once again. And the Tea Party problem hasnt gone away in the meantime (although they did re-brand themselves the Freedom Caucus for some inexplicable reason).

What this means is that 2017 is going to see a return to the same old knife fights within the Republican caucus. The debt ceiling is going to have to be raised, the budget is going to have to be voted on, and on top of that Republicans are itching to reform the tax code (which, of course, is a euphemism for give enormous tax cuts to the wealthiest of the wealthy, once again).

The Ryan myth was that he was the knight in shining armor who was going to be able to get all Republicans to agree on actual bills (with actual numbers), for the good of the party and for the betterment of the conservative agenda. He was the uber-wonk. He could reach out to the Tea Party faction and convince them to get with the Ryan program. That myth is soon going to be revealed to be nothing more than a fantasy.

The entire Ryancare fiasco is informative. Ryan put out his favored bill, and fully expected Republicans to fall into line behind him, while he bravely fought off the slings and arrows from the Democrats. That was the plan, at any rate. They were going to rush the bill through both houses with lightning speed, and prove to the country that they were incredibly capable of governing, now that they had a Republican in the White House. It has only been a week and a half since the bill was publicly unveiled, and already Ryancare is in deep trouble within his own Republican ranks.

Ryancare is being attacked by the Tea Partiers (for not being sufficiently cruel to the poor) and by moderate Republicans (for already being too obviously cruel to the poor). Ryan may not even be able to scrape up enough votes to pass the bill in the House, and even if he does manage that Herculean feat, it has already been pronounced dead on arrival in the Senate by Republicans. Ryan, so far, is refusing to change his bill in any meaningful way, but the opposition from both the far right and the center within his party means that any possible meaningful shift in the bill is going to please one group while further disappointing the other. If it was just the Tea Partiers grousing, Ryan might have some room for compromise, but thats not the case.

Somewhere, John Boehner is laughing. Because this is exactly the sort of thing which so frustrated him. The competing demands by the various GOP factions are impossible, at times, to reconcile. And remember, Ryancare is a bill without an obvious deadline to meet on the calendar. The only pressure to pass the bill comes from Republicans own political needs. There is no date when Social Security checks are going to stop being mailed if the bill doesnt pass, in other words. The situation (and the time pressure) is entirely self-imposed by Ryan and the Republicans.

What all this means is that Ryancare probably wont pass, at least not in anything like its current form. But what does all this disarray mean for the upcoming budget fights? If Ryancare goes down in flames, the conservative media and the Tea Partiers are all going to be patting themselves on the back in a big way. Theyre already personally demonizing Ryan in the same fashion they used to treat Boehner. But the upcoming legislative fights do actually have deadlines attached.

When a bill simply must be passed (as with the debt ceiling, for instance), Ryans going to have only one route left open to him the same route Boehner routinely took. Ryan will have to allow the Tea Partiers to make as much noise as they want for a period of time, but then hes going to eventually have to sit down with persuadable Democrats in an effort to pass a bill. If Ryans own caucus wont back him up, then hes got to cross the aisle to get the votes. This will give Nancy Pelosi the same power she regularly wielded with Boehner, the power to strip the most odious parts of the Republican bill away before a single Democrat would vote for it. Which, in a feedback loop, will further enrage the Tea Partiers.

Ryan (and, to a lesser extent, Mitch McConnell) will be held up as a traitor to the conservative cause for backing down. This is the point where the Ryan myth will lie in tatters on the floor of the House. For all his supposed wonkiness, Ryan still wont be able to get the Tea Partiers to see any sort of reason. If theyve already defeated him once, over Ryancare, then theyre only going to see themselves as stronger for the upcoming fights. Which will make Ryans position weaker. Which, again, was exactly where John Boehner regularly found himself.

Of the three supposed young guns, Ryan is the only real success story (so far). Eric Cantor was primaried out of his congressional seat by a Tea Partier. Kevin McCarthy was briefly considered for the job Ryans now doing, but that only lasted about fifteen minutes. Whats truly ironic is that the image of the young guns was that of outsiders challenging their party to come up with a youthful and modern approach to conservatism. But now Ryans on the inside looking out at the Tea Partiers storming his castle. Ryans mythical brand of radicalism has been supplanted by the Tea Partys truly radical attitudes towards governing.

The failure of Ryancare is going to be momentous, because it not only will be a massive disappointment to Republicans who love to hate Obamacare, but also because it will be a harbinger for future congressional battles to come. If Ryancare comes to a disastrous end, one has to wonder how much longer Paul Ryan will be able to keep his speakership. Call it the Ryan myth smacking head-on into the Tea Party reality.

Chris Weigant blogs at:

Follow Chris on Twitter: @ChrisWeigant

Read more: http://ift.tt/2mS56RL

from The Ryan Myth Is In Big Trouble