#...should i even give him a character tag? tbd

[crowdsourcedloner]

[hyukaslvr]

strong enough | J. Jungkook (3)

<series masterlist

pairing: Jungkook x (f) reader

genre/tags: idol! Jungkook, idol! reader, idiot exes to lovers, slow burn ; k-drama feels (our beloved summer but not at the same time), angst, drama, fluff, smut

warnings: foul/explicit language, alcohol consumption, unhealthy coping mechanisms, feelings of helplessness, insecurities; commitment issues & emotionally constipated characters, panic attacks, reader is harsh towards Jungkook, Jungkook is a meanie!, mentions of old abuse (major trigger warning!!), talk about blood and wounds

w.c: TBD

series summary: you and Jungkook have too many personal problems, during and after your relationship and it keeps getting brought up. you both had tried multiple times to ignore the fact you were both struggling mentally and physically due to your workplace, but you always run back to each other. maybe one day, one day you'll get back to each other, with all your problems handled, maybe not. all you want is for him to shine like he always does, all he wants is you.

a/n at very bottom!

To my love, my forever. You will soon find out the reason why I am the way am I. Give me some time, my love, I will express everything and more to you. Soon, you’ll have everything once I am able to love and care for myself the way I want to do to you. You deserve everything and more than what I could ever give you, and I will be there for you always. I may never give you this, I may never allow you to read this. But just know, you mean so much to me. Even if I’m a pain in the ass, or if I piss you off, you will always be the person who helped me want to change for the better. I know it may seem like i’m leaving you behind, but pushing you away is the best way for me and you to be able to find ourselves. Once we are settled and ready, I will never let you go, ever again. Mark my words, use them against me, but I know that once you let me in, I’ll never leave your side ever again. You’re my one and only, forever. You are my future, my light, the person who drags me to be right. You mean so much to me and more. But for now, let me go to become the one that deserves your love and wellbeing. Take care of yourself, Jungkook, you will do many good things in life, with or without me.

“i think you should give it to him,” one of your members slur out, making your already wobbly head tilt up to her as she hiccups for the 5th time that same hour, you sighed and your head pounded as your squinted tightly to look at her, “seriously! i think he would want closure that way,”

Jungkook definitely did. he knew that when you wrote letters, you meant every little thing. he knew something happened between you and your ex, his name is like a slap in the face to you, and he could always notice.

his hands started to shake as he continued to read your note, he didn’t know how you came all the way to his house just to ring the door bell and drop it off. he was even shocked to notice his name in your handwriting on the top of the note. he wasn’t mad about it, he was just so, so sad. his eyes burned as another drop fell onto his lap. Jungkook knew it was for the best, but why does it hurt so bad and why does he feel like he’ll never get better while you do?

Jungkook didn’t want to think that way, but he did. he always did, he hurts to see you go but hurts even more to see you shine without him. he kept all your little notes in a box, he was really considering giving it back to you since it was at some of your most vulnerable times. he wouldn’t want to keep these just in case he snoops through them, like he’s doing right now as he was putting the other note in there along with the tons of others.

one of them wrote a song that you made about him, him never leaving you and the way you love him. it breaks his heart more, knowing that you’re no longer around, and that he just keeps fucking up.

when you wake up the next morning, your hungover member told you about a box she found outside the door step with your name on it, your ears ring as you stand in front of the box sitting on your bed, biting the inside of your cheek because this was Jungkook’s box. it had a polaroid of the two of you with shots in your hands on his balcony last summer. it was his favorite picture of you both and wanted to keep it with all the letters you even written him.

you pace around your room for like and hour, biting your lip and running your hand through your hair to calm yourself down. it finally felt like you guys were officially over, no matter how many times you’ve broken up. when you opened it finally, there was a new one, one you definitely didn’t write. you don’t even remember going to his house and giving him the one you were gonna keep for your sake.

it was Jungkook’s hand writing, you knew it from the back of your palm, literally as you have a tattoo that he gave you himself. it read,

forever

and looking at it makes you sick. you felt like crap anytime you thought of him, what you had put him through, all the stuff he doesn’t know about you. you knew him so well, but did he actually even know you, truly? it made you want to cry, the tears lining your waterline and you fight the urge.

you give yourself time before opening up his letter, preparing yourself for the worst or to cry. when you start reading it, you felt like he was there with you. it felt as if he was pacing around your room, looking you dead in the eyes and telling you everything you’ve been wanting to hear, but at the wrong time.

I miss you a lot, I know I say that a lot, but it’s true. I’m glad you wrote me this, I’m glad you’re trying to find ways to open up to me, I’m glad you love me. You are my everything, I want what’s best for you, and if it’s not me then so be it. You deserve the whole fucking world, and I hope you know I tried so hard to give it to you. Maybe, in the long run, we can be happy together. Maybe we can be able to know each other truly, I always wanted to. I believe in right person, wrong time, because you’ll forever be my person, even if i’m not in the picture. I love you, ______, I always will.

you wanted to sob, you didn’t even know what to do. you had dropped the note off not expecting anything back, but getting everything back? even a letter from him, confessing how much he loves and cares for you. you didn’t know how to feel, if it was closure or not. to you, yours was supposed to be. his, his was a love letter, you’ll never let go of it.

you had one more promotion for you group, and you had to prepare in so many ways. you had to practice tons, and practing handling your emotions until you’re a zombie to what you truly feel, you couldn’t handle being around Jungkook for long. it’s crazy, how much you used to look at him thinking you’d never do anything to hurt him, yet you’re over here making him suffer because you are in your head. it tears at the deepest parts of you, and it makes you feel so much at once.

so when it came to the event, you felt your knees lock when you saw him sitting with his team. he looked breathtaking, and it sucks that you can’t look at him for long before you cry because he looks too good. Jungkook always looked good, but whenever you wanted to ignore him, it’s like he knows and wants to look that fine. you gulp hard because walking to over your assigned seats, a couple seats back behind them but at an angle to a way that you can see every part of Jungkook, his hands and thighs especially.

ones that put you through hell, sent you to another universe is what he would of said and has said before, smoking off your balcony as you sat on his lap with your legs shaking trying to not fall off. he laughed as he smacked your thighs, watching them shake more as you practically whine in soreness.

he took another puff off his cig before putting it down on his designated ash tray, but even knowing you didn’t smoke, he kissed you hard, forcing the hot smoke into your mouth and through your pipes, allowing him to do anything to you because you were obsessed with everything he did.

“fucked you out, huh, princess?” he said against your ear as he gave you a second to breathe, making you almost choke as his hand started to move down and between your thighs, giving them a squeeze before going deep between them to touch you where you shook the most.

let’s just say, the memory had your legs close tightly together. the thought of how much have gave you that night, it made you miss him even more for just taking care of you like he said he would. you could feel it starting to stick against your skin, immediately wanting to go to the bathroom.

you thought you were stable enough to walk down the stairs in front of all the idols and fans including, instead you almost dropped face first into the steps instead someone’s hand wrapped around your waist and around the inside of your thigh, gripping it hard as they held you from falling to your death infront of thousands of people.

“your shoes too big for you, baby?”

you really thought you were going crazy, that his presence was just teasing you. but as your eyes dragged themselves down to the hand around the inside of your thigh, you weren’t going crazy. the tattoos proving who the man really was and how his thumb was very close to your throbbing clit. you shivered before quicking bowing at him once you leave his grip and speed walking towards the exit.

the moment you got alone in a hallway, you looked around before pulling out your phone to text your leader where you were going to be, the bathroom, before you hear a door open behind you. you go to put your phone away, but a tight grip around your waist turns you towards the person, your phone falling on to the floor and your mouth to open up, perfect for the attacker to kiss you hard.

another hand grabs your hair and you immediately knew who it was based on the way he was holding you. he knew, and knew it was because of him. that’s all your thought about when his lips were softly against yours, until you felt his hands creeping up. he just knew how to distract you from the facts and knows how to get you to enjoy his attack.

“can we talk soon, princess?” he whispers lowly in your ear once he pulls away from your now desperate lips trying to reach his. you whimper at the nickname, one that just rolls off his tongue in such a degrading way, he grabs your chin softly, turning your face to face him. his eyes invited yours, and the longer you looked into them, the more you felt entranced by him.

“talk about what?” you sighed into his hold, which he notices and gives you your favorite smile in the whole world. it hard to ignore his hands gripping your waist, your hands clinging onto his dress shirt as he holds you, you didn’t expect to be in this position.

“we will talk later tonight, i’ll pick you up?”

“how, with what car-”

“i’ll figure it out, anything for you,” he presses his forehead against yours, making your eyes squeeze shut as he lets out a little chuckle because of your reaction to his proximity being so close to you, you could almost feel his breath against your lips. “you know i’ll do whatever i need to do to see you, i will figure out a way to see you later tonight, bunny, i promise,” he kisses your nose softly before letting you go without your even realizing he picked up your phone for you, a smile across his face as you nodded your head for him.

Jungkook didn’t give you a time, or a place to when he was going to pick you up. before you left the event, you had asked him what he was planning on doing with you and he just told you that you’ll have to wait and find out. Jungkook knew how to make you worry about what could happen. what should you even wear? is he taking me somewhere to eat? it’s kinda late for that-

doink

something just hit your window as you were pulling your pants up, you almost tripped in shock but managed to pull them up and fix yourself before going to your window. there he was, the man of your dreams, the love of your life, standing down there searching for more rocks to toss at your window.

you cracked your dorm room window open, not even wanting to question how he managed to get over the brick wall to get into the dorms, and he smiles when he sees your head peaking from the bottom of the window. he pats his hands on his thighs while you watch him with curiosity.

“get down here bunny, we have a lot to do tonight,” he stood up straight, hands put in his pockets as he stared off at you. you would of jumped right there into his arms after that nickname, you almost whined before nodding your head like an idiot and shutting your window.

you managed to sneak out, grabbed your shoes at the front and headed out from the back blind spot and running to where Jungkook stood, his hands tucked in his pockets to stay warm. his left arm raised so you could wrap your arm around it, a habit of the both of you. you just ignored the bad feelings and wrapped your arm around his, feeling his arm tighten around yours as you both started to walk to the car.

“you gonna tell me where we’re going, Jeon?” you tilt your head, your left knee against his center console as your left side rested on his passenger seat. his hand slid up to your knee, leaving you in shock as he gripped it in warning.

“stop asking questions, baby,” he tapped his finger on your knee, not even bothering to look your way. you huffed as you closed your eyes, trying to ignore his thumb moving against your thigh now, his hand resting against it too.

“Jungkook, you know we can be doing this again. i know you remember what happened last time,” you warned, your head felt like it was spinning, none of this felt real. Jungkook bit his lip ring in thought, he just wanted to talk to you and apologize. he always wants to talk to you even if he’s been rude.

“______, what do you think i’m going to do to you tonight?” he spoke deeply, it sent waves through your spine, and down to your poor kitty. it’s crazy, what this big eyed man can do to you with only his hand on your thigh while he speaks to you like your his.

“i- i don’t know, what are you asking me? i’m just confused why you’re doing this-”

“what do you want me to do to you tonight, baby? is there something else bothering you that only i can fix?” his hand rubs your inner thigh, occasionally softly squeezing the skin closest to where you needed help the most. “i’ll do whatever you want me to do to you, you just have to speak up, darling. is that okay? can you do that for me, princess?”

you almost moaned, gasping at his eagerness to help you with whatever you want, and you knew he meant that. “Jungkook, we can’t be doing thing again, as much as we want to-”

“fuck that and fuck no contact, we were doing good as fuck the last time we were friends. can we not be friends, baby?”

“that’s why! you keep calling me my favorites, you can’t do that to me..” you whined, you wanted to hide away as he giggled at how you whined. when the car slowly starts to come to a stop, you got reminded that the whole time you were talking to him, getting teased by him, he was driving. “Jungkook… where are we?”

“let me help you out and show you,” he smiled, and you just knew that you had to trust him, why? because he’s Jeon Jungkook, why wouldn’t you trust the love of your life?

when he open your door, hand already reaching for his as he helped you out of the car, the smell of salt hit your face in a whiff, making you smile at the moment you had at this beach with Jungkook. but why here? why did he want to talk here?

you didn’t trust your voice, watching his open his back door to grab a blanket and cigs, which you thought he quit, with a lighter and a flashlight. you didn’t say a word as you hugged onto his arm as he walked to a specific place, your guys place. the place where he gave you head for the very first time, you found sand up there for at least a day after that.

“do you trust me, sugar?” Jungkook asked you, tugging you to sit next to him on the blanket over the cold sand at the dark lonely beach. it’s like he knew what you were worried about, could you trust him again? it’s not like he broke your trust, it’s about you trusting yourself around him. if anything besides talking happens tonight, and you guys become exactly what you were afraid of becoming, you won’t know what to do with yourself.

it’s a bit selfish you thought, as his hand rested against your shoulder as you snuggled against his neck, breathing in only Jungkook and a little bit of salt. you loved this, but it couldn’t get any farther than this. just small, and slight, touches and sometimes kisses, only at certain times. the sound of the waves crashing tingled your ears, debating if you should listen to his heartbeat or not.

“do you know why i want you out here with me tonight, baby?” his voice vibrated your cheek as he spoke, his fingers gliding against the thin fabric of your long sleeved shirt. you hummed, you felt him swallow before you moved your head to face him.

“i wouldn’t have asked you that a million times in the car, Jungkook,” he smiles when your eyes finally reach his. he used to ask you, what did you see when you looked into his eyes? you usually just laughed it off or ignored the question, but now you think you know the questions answer. Home. in other words, Jungkook was your confort, the one you would go to, the one who makes you feel the safest, the one who keeps you feeling warm. Jungkook was your favorite.

Jungkook leans in, you can almost feel his breath against the wind, you almost forget where you are when you look deeply into his eyes. he leans so close to you that you could almost kiss him. you feel his arm wrap around your waist, pulling you closer- and closer to him, until your hovering above him.

you looked down at him, his hand sliding down your waist and on to your thigh to swing your leg over his body. he’s got you now, almost spread wide for him as his eyes glazed your entire body, making your shiver.

“let’s that about why you were so wet when i caught you from eating shit in front of everyone today, huh? or maybe… why you’re so wet right now, was it from the car ride? you just couldn’t wait, hm? baby?” he smacked your thigh, and you almost whimper at his words, “sit down on me, love. you know you want to. i’ll do anything you want me to, just let me in this one or more times and you won’t regret it this time,”

oh boy, you were in for a ride. baby, princess, sugar, darling, bunny, love. hearing that one burned, deeply in two places. your poor heart as you feel his hands grip your sides, and your poor throbbing cunt that it about to get slammed onto his hard on resting below you. either or, you know you’re safe and whatever happens can be dealt with. why? because you’re with Jeon Jungkook, why wouldn’t it be fine?

a/n: holy shit, this took forever and i sincerely apologize!! i love how this episode turned out and i will give you guys a slight warning! spicy scenes are coming up and I’m not backing down from this. it will be the dirtiest, most greatest- yeah! anyways, thank you for your patience, i love you all🥹

taglist: @loumin908 @heartjiminie @cuntessaiii @parkinglot-nights @minsoa97kor @jkgirlfr @lavendersugarplum @gaebestie @whoa-jo @kp0pficdump @yunholuv @skzthinker @shwkoqp18 @veemegatron @kaiparkerwifes @alextgef @nerdycheol @nightappple @nlr1606 @chl0buggy

if your tag isn’t gray, please fix your settings so i can tag you next time love!

[chimcess]

Waterlog {P.J.M.} (Teaser)

Pairing: Jimin x Reader(Past Namjoon x Reader) Other tags:Doctor!Jimin, Swim Coach!Reader, Disabled!Reader, Ex alcoholic!Jimin,  Ex alcoholic!Reader, Ex Drug addict!Reader, AA!AU Genre:Recovering Addict! AU, Strangers to lovers! AU, HEAVY Angst, Slow Burn, Eventual Fluff, Mutual Pining,18+, M Word Count: TBD (~40k ;-; my bad) Released Date: 06/15/2022 Synopsis:  wa·ter·log|verb| to saturate with water “For just a second of a second, I was floating. We were alone, him and I, and no one else mattered. I felt myself breathe and managed to give him a small smile. He responded with another blinding show of teeth and I swore I saw my entire life play out at that moment.”

Warnings: Talks of past drug use, talks of past alcohol abuse, discussions of major death (does not happen in story), Reader had major depression and anxiety, Reader has a prosthetic leg, Talks of bad car accident, Talks of drunk driving, Small town leads to a lot of gossip and mean rumors, Jimin is a suffer in silence type, ANGST, Mentions of toxic relationships (not between MC and Jimin), Side character death (not in story), Strong language, kissing, intense make out, Talks of prosthetics and disabilities, Reader has not come to terms with being an amputee, Bitterness, Guilt, Huge insecuries, Jimin and MC are working towards getting better  

A/N: Ha ha...haaaaaa. So, in the middle of writing the next part of The Spork, this idea popped into my head and I can’t stop writing it. So, I felt it was only fair that I share this with you all since it’s causing my brain to short-circuit on everything else I even attempt to write. I mean that. I have written close to 20k and counting in about three days, so it’s safe to say that this has become my new obsession. This is a super heavy one to write and read but I also love everyone in my little world. I do think you should steer on the side of caution when diving into this one once it’s fully out as it does deal with some incredibly tough subjects that are not for everyone. (we’re not at the very beginning for this teaser)

I heard laughing as I unlocked my car and saw the group of men leaving. Apparently, both Jin and Hoseok decided to tag along. I was even happier I had declined. As much as I enjoyed them individually, Jin and Hoseok put together was asking the universe for a migraine. I smiled to myself and popped my truck to throw my bag back inside. It was such a mess that my hatchback was the only space not littered with papers, receipts, and old McDonald’s bags. I need to clean my car, I thought. I knew I would not. 

Then I heard it. It was loud but sweet, almost childlike in its inflection. I turned around just in time to see Dr.Park with his head thrown back and the biggest smile I had ever seen. He was laughing, probably at something Taehyung said if I was taking a guess, and he lightly stumbled on his own feet before laughing harder at himself. I found myself smiling. His good mood was contagious and I envied him for being able to laugh so freely. He had a dimple. Joon had two.

My smile was gone again. I needed to go. I slammed my trunk shut and quickly got inside, missing the pair of eyes following my every move.

[babyjamiebarnes]

Build-A-Bear

Part Eleven

Featuring: Bucky x Stark!reader, dad!Tony, Steve, Sam, Peter, OC background characters

Warnings: language, sexual implications and references, blackmail

Summary: Bucky decides it’s time to come clean to Tony, consequences be damned. Steve has his own bombshell, of sorts.

Author’s Note: Hi. I’m a lazy piece of crud. I wanted to post this earlier but I suck. It’s kinda short too, at least compared to previous parts. There will probably only be a couple parts left, maybe 2-3? I’m posting these chapters as I write so tbd in length lol. And as always, feel free to buy me a coffee!

Tags: @amourmarvel @fangirlvoice @kennedywxlsh @devilswaldorf @what-the-hap-is-fuckning @alyispunk @fredweasleysbitchh @wearegroot @sunflowerbebe107 @prestigious-tea @brckenmemories @angelbabymed @charmedbysarge @cruelsummer-s

Series Masterlist

“Are you fucking insane?”

Everyone moved back to your apartment to avoid freaking poor Matt out any more. And now there was a standoff in your living room.

“It’s the only course of action that makes sense,” Bucky said in his defense.

“Buck, her dad will skin you alive if he sees those pictures,” Sam said. “Even if he’s somehow fine with it, she’ll lose her job!”

“If we don’t do this, that kid downstairs loses his family!” Bucky shouted back.

Sam groaned in exasperation and ran his hands over his face. “There’s gotta be a way to get the money.”

“There’s not,” you said defeatedly. All eyes turn to you. They initially looked to you for guidance, but your reliance on Bucky gave him the wheel on your own personal highway to hell. “Even if we do give this person the money, there’s only one person we can get that kind of cash from. Bucky’s right. We have to tell my dad.”

“[Y/N], maybe we should brainstorm some other options,” Peter nearly whispered, keeping his voice soft in the midst of the chaos. “I don’t want you to lose your job.”

“I’ll quit,” Bucky said suddenly. “I’ll quit being an Avenger and just do, fuck, private security? Or something.”

You could see the stress and fear and frustration written on his face. In a couple steps, you were standing in front of him and were able to cup his scruffy cheeks as you spoke.

“We’ll figure all that out later.” You perked up on your toes and gave him a short kiss. “But right now, we’re on a bit of a time crunch. I’d like to end this sooner rather than later so… let’s tell Tony.”

With Peter willingly sitting in the open trunk area of the Jeep, everyone was able to fit in one car back to the Tower. The tension inside the vehicle could’ve been cut, sliced, and diced with a knife. No one wanted to say anything, but no one really knew what to say anyway.

Steve was still silent. He didn’t say a word when you discussed telling Tony, but you could practically see the gears turning in his head. He had something to say, he just wasn’t saying it.

By the time you got to the Tower, you felt like you were gonna throw up. You held the envelope with the letter and media tight in your grasp, only letting go to open your door. The second your feet touched the garage floor, Bucky was right beside you.

He kept a firm grip on your hand, squeezing a little extra so you knew he was there with you and wasn’t going to let anything bad (worse) happen. Knowing he was willing to risk his entire livelihood for you made you love him even more. But you knew if it came down to it, you’d give up your position with the Avengers. Even with only two years spent at Stark Industries — just under a year spent with the Avengers (and nearly a year with Bucky) — you’d have no problem getting a new job with any other company. Bucky’s skills were put to the best use saving the world.

As the elevator approached the floor with your dad’s office, Sam finally broke the silence.

“Do you want us to be in there with you? I’m thinking it might be better if it’s just you two.”

You turned to see Peter wringing his hands, subconsciously agreeing with Sam — he clearly didn’t want to be in the room when all this went down but was putting on a brave face to be a good support system. Steve still stood silent with his arms crossed over his chest. Whatever was going on in that head was still festering.

“I think you’re right,” you agreed with Sam. “We’ll come find you once he gets the news.”

Your eyes met Bucky’s and even though he was trying to remain confident for you, there was fear behind those baby blues.

“We’ll be okay,” you said just loudly enough for him to hear.

When you reached the floor you’d been dreading, Sam, Steve, and Peter all turned to go to their designated rooms, partially because it had been a while since all of them had been back, partially to stay far away from the impending outburst.

You took a deep breath and started toward Tony’s office, just to be pulled back into Bucky’s arms. He held you tight, nuzzling his face in your hair and just holding you. You gripped the back of his shirt in response and just took a moment to appreciate the hard muscles of his chest and the weight of his arms around you.

“We’re gonna be okay,” you whispered.

Bucky let out a breath and kissed the crown of your head.

“I don’t want to lose you.”

This made you pull back and look up at him.

“Lose me? Bucky, I’m not going to let this affect us. No matter what happens, I’m not going anywhere. I love you too much, Bucky Bear.”

The affectionate nickname made him smile, even if it was just a little quirk of the lips.

“I love you too, Build-A-Bear.”

You let him hold you for a couple more minutes before leading him to your dad’s closed office door. When you slowly pushed the door open, you saw Tony sitting behind his desk with half a dozen holographic screens open in front of him.

“Hey pumpkin, what are you doing here?” he asked, barely taking his eyes off his work for a second.

“Um, I kind of really need to talk to you.” Despite being on close speaking terms with your dad — the kind where you felt comfortable swearing in front of him and joking with him, even sharing some of your secrets — you felt like this was crossing a line.

Of course it was. You were in bed with (his perception of) the enemy.

Tony could tell something was wrong by how timid you sounded. You were always loud and bubbly with him — a quality you definitely got from him. He swiped all of the screens closed and walked around the large desk to stand in front of you. He briefly met Bucky’s eyes as the super soldier stood close behind you.

“What’s going on?”

“You-you should probably sit down for this,” you said shakily. Tony took the seat nearest you instead of walking back behind his desk. “So… you know how I’ve been dating James for, like, 10, 11ish months now?”

“And I still haven’t met him?” Tony said with a quirked brow.

“Yeah.” You forced a chuckle. “Well, when we were going through mail this morning, I… I got this.”

You held up the envelope before sliding out the letter and handing it to your dad. His expression went from curious to furious in seconds as his eyes scanned the entire page.

“They sent pictures. Pictures taken through my apartment windows of me and James. Being… intimate.”

“James who?” your dad asked, still staring at the letter. When you didn’t reply, he looked you in the eye, his expression hard as he demanded, “[Y/N], what is James’s last name?”

You took a short breath, the most your anxiety-gripped lungs could handle, and avoided his gaze as you replied.

“Barnes.”

Tony shot up from his seat, his eyes moving from you to the man behind you. The familiar feeling of a metal hand on your lower back helped ease the anxiety coursing through you at your dad’s reaction. When Tony took a step toward Bucky, you countered with a panicked step between them, looking up at your dad and pleading.

“He didn’t know who I was.”

“Bullshit,” Tony spat. He and Bucky were glaring at each other over your head.

“He didn’t, I swear. He found out the same day everyone else did.”

The grinding of his teeth let you know he was seething. But trying to hold it together for now.

“Let me see the rest,” Tony said calmly, holding his hand out. You reluctantly dropped the photos and DVD into his open palm. Bucky didn’t want to get too affectionate, so he just rested his hand on your hip while Tony flipped through the photos.

Everything was back in order, so he went through the same sequence you did: pap photos, to apartment photos, to sex photos. You could tell when the pictures turned raunchy by the way Tony’s face contorted, tossing the photos down shortly after.

“Friday, play the disc,” he commanded. The video played against the only blank wall in the room, the audio of you and Bucky playing through the speakers.

“Dad, you really don’t need to —” you started, quickly stopped by a sharp glare from your father.

“What are you gonna do to me?”

“I’m gonna put a baby in you. I’m gonna cum inside this tight pussy until you can’t take it anymore.”

“Jesus fucking Christ,” Tony nearly growled. “Friday, shut it off.”

“I tried to tell you,” you murmured under breath, though not loud enough for him to hear. Bucky did hear it though, evident by the way he squeezed your hip.

Tony leaned forward against his desk, hanging his head in clear frustration. You knew better than to speak up while he contained his emotions, so you stood in silence with Bucky as your dad sighed heavily and spoke to himself under his breath.

“You just have something against me, don’t you?” Tony said accusingly to Bucky.

“Don’t do that,” you scoffed. “You don’t get to do that. If you’re going to get mad at anyone, it needs to be me.” You never got snappy with your dad, but everything weighing on your shoulders frayed your nerves and his attitude didn’t do anything to fix it. “I’m the one who knew full well what we were doing. I’m the one who had all the details. I’m the one who chose to risk everything for this from the start. So if you’re really that mad, take it out on me. Otherwise, help us. We’ll get to the semantics and firing and all that bullshit later. Right now, there are literal lives on the line.”

Tony was still fuming until he heard the last line.

“What do you means ‘lives on the line’?”

Bringing Steve, Sam, and Peter in helped all of you explain what happened, from the note you received to the first viewing of the photos and video to the confrontation with Matt, but not without Tony grilling all of them about when and how they found out about you and Bucky. Peter looked nervous about keeping a secret from his boss, but you knew your dad wouldn’t do anything too bad to the kid. Maybe kick him off a couple missions, but nothing noteworthy. Steve and Sam looked like they really couldn’t care less, especially since Sam was the last to know.

Despite still wanting to rip Bucky’s arm off and beat him with it, Tony remained civil for your sake, at least until all of this was sorted.

The first step was getting Peter, Happy, and Pepper to try to track down where the letters came from, which likely meant scanning for fingerprints (despite how many hands held it that day alone). The second step was for you, Bucky, Tony, Sam, and Steve to scope out your building and any neighboring buildings someone may have been scoping your apartment from. There was no one someone could’ve been dangling outside your windows without you noticing. The third step was meeting with your doorman again to try to piece together some answers.

You all agreed to keep local law enforcement out of it so the culprit didn’t catch on as quickly. Having a few Avengers and Tony Stark show up at Tony’s daughter’s apartment wasn’t out of the ordinary so you could still stay under wraps. There was no reason to draw attention to your place and possibly trigger the mystery person into accelerating their plans.

With your dad’s confidence in the plan, you gradually grew more and more optimistic about the plan. If all else failed, Tony would get the two million and continue tracking the fucker down. It wouldn’t be hard to sneak a tracker into the cash and watch where it goes once it’s out of your hands. That’s when you could bring in local law enforcement.

It felt like things were finally going your way.

As you and your crew headed downstairs to drive back to your place, Steve grabbed your arm and tugged you to the side.

“Can I talk to you for a second?” he asked quietly.

You nodded and followed him down the hall; Bucky was busy talking to Sam and Tony was on the phone briefing Rhodey so he could stand guard outside your doorman’s place for a while, giving you the perfect opportunity to step away for a minute. When Steve pulled you into a side room, you finally spoke up.

“What’s up? Is everything okay?”

Steve crossed his arms and huffed. That signature frown of his softened when he met your concerned gaze.

“I know we’re not necessarily close, but I consider you a friend. You know that, right?”

“I consider you a friend too,” you said with a nod.

“What I’m about to say... I need you to keep it between us. Don’t tell Bucky or Sam or Peter or your dad. Just between us, at least for now. Okay?”

“O-okay...? You’re making me nervous, Steve,” you admitted. “What’s going on?”

“I think I know who’s blackmailing you.”

[spideystark-2021archive]

I posted 1,143 times in 2021

317 posts created (28%)

826 posts reblogged (72%)

For every post I created, I reblogged 2.6 posts.

I added 1,155 tags in 2021

#unpaidpiper - 350 posts

#t; peter & nettie - 292 posts

#c; peter stark: v; heroes & villains - 163 posts

#;;ooc - 109 posts

#;;m e m e - 70 posts

#c; peter stark - 62 posts

#c; peter stark: v; recluse - 28 posts

#;;swinging through the rooftops [queue] - 28 posts

#;;headcanons - 27 posts

#c; peter stark: v; tbd - 26 posts

Longest Tag: 140 characters

#peter having two dads and a mom bc as long as pepper was tonys assistant he still calls her mom after doing. it by accident when he was like

My Top Posts in 2021

#5

|| CLOSED || Peter & Nettie ||

@unpaidpiper​​​

“Um....Nettie why is their a child in our dorm room?” He goes to visit Morgan for 1 damn day.

13 notes • Posted 2021-08-19 05:10:40 GMT

#4

|| CLOSED || Peter & Nettie ||

@unpaidpiper​​

It’d been a couple of days since Peter had been threatened by what was apparently Nettie’s Dad, he hadn’t mentioned it to him yet...but he figured he probably should since they were finally hanging out again. “So uh, I might have had a run in with Captain Cold...” He wasn’t sure if Nettie knew about what Leonard had done or not, but since he said Nettie didn’t know about him being Spiderman he figured probably not.

13 notes • Posted 2021-10-19 20:41:48 GMT

#3

|| OPEN || Peter & ??? ||

“Whelp! Time for my micro dose of Meth!” Peter you can’t just call your Adderall meth.

14 notes • Posted 2021-08-09 20:59:31 GMT

#2

|| CLOSED || Peter & Nettie ||

@unpaidpiper​

“Nettie-listen. Your one of my best friends but it’s come to my attention that you are completely obvious and I personally am losing my mind and also a little worried for your safety.”

23 notes • Posted 2021-09-13 02:31:54 GMT

#1

|| CLOSED || Peter & Nettie ||

@unpaidpiper

Scott had planned out their mission pretty well, and he managed to get into the SWORD location and unlock the doors for Peter, Sam, Bucky and Kate. They'd split up once they were inside, there were three wings that they needed to get people released from. Scott and Kate had gone to one since Scott would be able to help with getting things open, Peter had installed software on redwing to let him get cell doors open and he was on his own.

He was telling people to stay put in their cell doorways until all the doors were unlocked to give the best chance for everyone to get free and he was about three fourths of the way through his wing and he knew that the shift change would blow their cover within the next 10 minutes. He looked through a window slat before opening the next door the same way he had been with all of them and when he spotted Nettie he froze for a second before his AI spoke up and he quickly got the cell door open.

As soon as it was open he went inside and basically whisper yelled. "Nettie, what are you doing here? How long have you been here?" He couldn't imagine why Nettie would be in here, even though he knew it had to be because he had some kind of ability. That was the main reason SWORD had taken these people if their information was right.

162 notes • Posted 2021-09-29 06:51:12 GMT

Get your Tumblr 2021 Year in Review →

[dzthorne]

Intro to “From Dust, Return”

Working Title: From Dust, Return

Genre: TBD - working genre = Dark Fantasy with occasional hints of horror and the occult.

Themes: Conflicting loyalties, finding a purpose in the ashes of betrayal, and secrets that should never have been hidden.

Content Warnings: Possibility of occasional Graphic Violence, Blood, and Death.

Setting: Present day, fictional setting.

POV: Third person, multiple

Status: First draft

Synopsis: Betrayed by an unknown source, the seraphim Raziel finds himself stranded upon an Earth that stopped believing in him centuries ago, banished from his home. Upon arriving he learns of an artifact that he once personally created to save humanity that now threatens to destroy them. He must chose between learning who betrayed him and getting revenge or setting aside his personal pain in the pursuit of saving the very people he once swore to protect eons before. Unlikely allies and friendly enemies will turn his world upside down as he strives to learn his purpose amidst secrets that come to light; secrets that could very well push him down a much darker path than his betrayer could have foreseen.

5 Main Characters:

Raziel Seraphim (angel) - One of the seven original seraphim generals of heaven, he strongly believes there is a difference between a warrior and a soldier. Abandoned by all that he knows, he stands before three choices. At the end of each are secrets and dire consequences for those around him. He must learn the truth of what is most important to him and choose before a fury born of betrayal consumes who he once was and reveals a secret he has hidden from Azreith since the war of angels. Where do all the secrets end?

Raziel has an obsession with rain, that permeates into how he views himself and the world around him.

Azreith Seraphim (angel) - Another of the seven original seraphim generals of heaven, she has been tasked with stopping Raziel by any means necessary before he destroys the balance between the realms. However she questions what is real between her orders and her loyalties. She sets out to learn the truth of Raziel’s actions as well as the source of her orders. Because one does not simply kill their twin brother without reason...

Azreith has two personalities that can manifest based upon her mood almost at will; this allows her to fulfill her two roles as Angel of Death and Mercy, with tell-tale signs giving away who she is at any given time.

Jericho Winters (human age 23) - An unassuming priest with a major crisis of faith who inherited his family’s small church upon their passing at the age of 15. With his prayers unanswered, he has lost faith in heaven existing. A chance encounter with Raziel will shatter his world view and draw him deeper into the workings of the divine. Can Jericho help an angel keep his humanity intact when it threatens to unravel, while keeping himself alive without any defense to speak of?

A voice only he can hear belittles Jericho for his lack of faith, yet he is unsure if the source is possession or his own subconscious berating him for being weak.

Charles Jaquin (human age 44) - A homicide detective investigating a string of homicides that appear to be connected which the bureau believes to be the work of a possible serial killer. All of the deaths have two things in common: absolutely no clues and the appearance of Jericho Winters at several of the crime scenes amidst the crowd of onlookers. Alongside his partner, Charles will stop at nothing to solve this case before it gets out of hand, even as fear for his own life begins to take hold.

Raised in a devout household, Charles is very strong in his faith that God and his miracles will protect him and those he protects; however his newest case causes him to second guess that protection as he decides if this should be his last case or not.

Michael Seraphim (angel) - Leader of the seven original seraphim generals and ruler of heaven, Michael took the throne upon it being abandoned by their father without challenge as no other qualified angel wanted the pressure or stress of running the realms. Heaven is beginning to decay and the energy that feeds and sustains the angels weakens. Michael initiates plans to purify it before it is too late. Can he save their home and prove to the other angels that they were not wrong for allowing him to assume the throne unchallenged?

Michael is responsible for weighing souls as they enter heaven with the heavenly scales; he blames himself for being too lax and allowing souls with trace amounts of taint into heaven to which he attributes the decay. His biggest fear should heaven fall is that he will cease to exist.

- - -

If you wish to be removed from my tag list, please let me know via message. And if you know anyone who may be interested in joining our merry crew, also please let me know. I love interacting with our fellow writers and artists.

@shinrinyoku-stormie , @inediblebrownie , @writersloth , @pilipalea , @all-bridges-will-burn , @elaynab-writing  , @midnightrose77 , @kindofwriter , @bookishdiplodocus , @christophercant, @leave-her-a-tome

I will be posting this post in two places, if you get a second tag please forgive me. ^_^ Finished this with you in mind @kindofwriter, and thanks to @shinrinyoku-stormie for allowing me to brainstorm a few things beforehand.

[i-am-a-closet-fanfic-fiend]

The Art of Love (Part 2) ~ Steve Rogers x Reader College!AU

A/N 10/17/2020: Formerly algorithm knows best and companion to cupid’s code. Whether an updated version of Cupid’s Code will be a companion is TBD. 

: Hello my lovelies! So my muse decided she wanted to wrok on this and Cupid’s Code. And my hope was to have both finished before I released but I’m impatient and wanted to share. But it looks like this will be my main focus over the next few weeks. Not to worry I’m still working on Queer Eye for the Cap Guy but I want it to be really good so it’s taking a bit more time than I planned. So I hope you can enjoy this in its place this week. 

Summary: You and Steve have been best friends since sophomore year. Everyone thinks you should be more, but neither of you believe it. That is until Tony Stark’s infallible dating algorithm matches you up. 

Characters/Pairings: Steve Rogers x reader (Platonic - for now), Wanda, Bucky 

Rating: K+

Warnings: None really. Maybe language? 

Word Count: 1165 

Main Masterlist | The Art of Love Masterlist | Broken Hearts and Robot Parts Masterlist (Companion Fic) ​

Y/N POV 

“Well, well, well,” Wanda grinned from the couch as you walked into your apartment Saturday afternoon still wearing Steve’s clothes. “Looks like somebody’s date went well last night. Once he got there. You didn’t even bring your dress home.”

You looked down at your hands in confusion and realized that your dress was still on the floor of Steve’s bedroom.  Well actually, knowing him it was hanging on his closet door.

“Not exactly,” you grimaced.

“What do you mean?”

“I mean, I didn’t spend the night with him. I didn’t even order food.”

“Then whose clothes are those?”

“Steve’s,” you sighed.

“Should’ve known.” She patted the spot next to her on the couch. “Tell me all about it.”

“It was terrible, Wanda,” you groaned as you flopped down next to her. “He was thirty minutes late. And then he spent the twenty minutes I was there trying to get into the waitress’ pants. And then he suggested a threesome. Twenty minutes in! I bailed and went to the studio to work on my midterm. Steve happened to be working too and so we went back to his place and ate Chinese food and watched the Good Place.”

“I’m sorry, honey.”

“It’s just so frustrating. I don’t know why I bother. This is the fifth failed date in a month. Maybe I should give up on love and just focus on my dancing.”

“Don’t give up on love, y/n. Maybe it’s closer than you think,” she murmured, eyeing the Henley you were wearing.

“Don’t start that again, Wan. You know Steve doesn’t think of me like that.”  

“Because Steve let’s so many girls wear his clothes and sleep in his bed.”

“I didn’t…”

She cut you off with a stern look.

“Don’t lie to me.”

You sighed as you thought about waking up this morning, Steve’s soft snore and the weight of his arm around your waist. It was hardly the first time.

“Still, it’s not that weird for two best friends to sleep in the same bed together.”

“Really? Then how come you and Loki never share a bed when he stays over.”

“That’s different.”

“Oh really? Why?”

Damn it. She had you and she knew it.

“Look, all I’m saying is. What really went through your head when you went out with that guy last night?”

“I’d rather be with Steve,” you admitted, playing with the hem of the shirt. “But it’s not possible. He only sees me as a friend. He made that very clear. Very early on.”

“People can change their mind.”

“Yeah. But they usually don’t.”

“Well, if that’s actually what you believe. Why don’t you come with me tonight? I have to go to Pietro’s fundraiser thing.”

“Somehow I don’t think going to a frat event is going to help my love life. Besides aren’t they co-hosting with Gamma?”

“Yeah,” Wanda sighed. “I’m not thrilled about that part, but I promised Pietro.”

“I’m sure it will be fun. But I really need to go back to the studio. Choreographing to Loki’s music is proving harder than I expected. I’m just not sure what he’s trying to say with this one.”

Wanda nodded understandingly.

“I’m sure you’ll figure it out and it’ll be beautiful.”

“I hope so.”  

  Steve’s POV

Steve was sitting out on his fire escape attempting to sketch when his front door banged open.  

“Hey, punk, you home? Ooh cinnamon rolls.”

Steve rolled his eyes and crawled back in through the open window.

“You know you don’t live here anymore, right?”

“Did Smudge have another shitty date?” Bucky asked ignoring Steve’s comment as he plopped down on the couch with his second pastry.

“Yeah.”

“She knows she could’ve skipped the shitty date bit and gone straight to your bed right?”

“We didn’t sleep together.” Steve snapped, putting his notebook down on the end table and grabbing his own cinnamon roll. “I found her in the studio. We got take out and watched TV.”

“And then she fell asleep. You carried her to bed and she pouted at you to stay with her.”

Steve’s jaw clenched at Bucky’s description. It was entirely too accurate.

“What do you have cameras in here or somethin’?”

“No, punk. But I lived with you for three years. I’ve watched that same scenario play out a dozen different times. And every time there’s some sort of baked good as a thank you.”

“Oh yeah?”

“Yeah. Every shitty date she has ends up with her in your arms. Maybe she should just start there,” he remarked pointedly.  

“Don’t start with that again. We’re not in love with each other.”

“I didn’t say that you were,” Bucky argued with a smug smirk. “But you can’t honestly tell me you don’t wish that it was you she was going out with.”

Steve glared but Bucky simply stared right back with his quirked eyebrow.

“Fine. Of course I wish it was me. But she’ll never see me like that. I was in the right place at the right time to put myself firmly in the best friend zone. And I’m okay with that. I’m not going to throw away three years of friendship because I went and fell in love with her like an idiot.”

“Steve.”

“Just don’t, Buck. Please,” he sighed. “Today sucks enough already.”

That comment was enough to derail him from the familiar argument.

“What’s going on?”

“I’ve been trying to work on my midterm for weeks and I can’t find any inspiration. This is all I’ve gotten out of a three hour session,” he huffed picking up the sketchpad and tossing it in Bucky’s lap.

“This is a blank sheet of paper,” Bucky observed.

“Exactly. I’m completely blocked. And my collection is due in two months.”

“What are you supposed to be painting?”

“Contentment,” Steve sighed. “But apparently I don’t know what that looks like. And I’m supposed to come up with four different paintings.”

“Why don’t you go for a run? Clear your mind a little. You always get your best ideas when you’re running.”

“That’s actually a pretty good idea.”

“I’ve been known to have them,” he quipped. “And then you should take your mind off of it. You could come to the fundraiser tonight.”

“Not my scene, Buck. Besides I really need to at least get started. Phil will kill me if I don’t have any progress when we meet on Tuesday."

“Yeah right. That man worships the ground you walk on. If he had it his your stuff would already be on display at the Met.”

“That’s not true.”

“It’s a little true. Well, if you change your mind. It’s at Triskellion at seven. I’ve got to head over there now and give them the approved drinks list.”

“Who’s bartending tonight?” Steve asked in a knowing tone.

“Shut up.”

“Just don’t be an ass to her. She’s working it’s not fair.”

“Yes, mom,” he muttered as he rolled his eyes. “I’ll talk to you later.”

“Yeah, see you man.”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

A/N: Welp say hello to my new favorite idiots. I’m very much in love with them and I hope you will be too! 

xoxo 

Naynay

Tag Lists are Open! (Please send an ask)

Update 3/15/2021: Hello, Lovelies. As some of you may have seen on the blog I have decided to suspend tag lists. If you would like to receive updates about new content please follow @naynay-writes​​ and turn on notifications. Thank you! Xoxo, Naynay

Steve/Chris Tag List @isaxhorror @peachykeen3502 @patzammit @wordlesscaptain @coffeebooksandfandom​ @hereisanapplepie @mywinterwolf

Marvel Tag List @hdthdthdt​   @sophiatomlinson23 @misty-panther @supermusicallee @scarlettsoldier @acupofhotlatte @slender--spirit @petitesmate @libbymouse

Permanent Tag List @iamwarrenspeace @jayzayy @bexboo616 @neoqueen306 @santheweird @rowenaravencalw @buckitybarnes @prxttybirdz @sergeantjbuckybarnes @captainsamwlsn @broitsmydick @ailynalonso15 @nyxveracity @queenoftrash97 @walkingtravesty97 @lamia-maizat @memyselfandmaddox @lowkeybuckyb @whiskey2011 @averyrogers83 @lovingpeterparker @buckybarneshairpullingkink @beansparker @coralphantomninja @xxashy999xx @thisismysecrethappyplace @ravennightingaleandavatempus @paintballkid711 @whosmarisaaarw @silverkitten547 @yknott81 @mmmmmmmmmchicken @thefridgeismybestie @crispy-kitten @isabelcrichards

[human-zim]

ok but like serious question umm? i rlly wanna be/make a zim-related rp blog but i dont exactly know how to start? uh sorry for the dumb question dude but do yall got any advice for me..?

You Cannot BE A ZIM unless you ARE ZIM! Seeing as I am ZIM myself, you CANNOT BE. Unless of course you are a LIAR. To each his own.

Now, ZIM-RELATED you say, is also impossible, as I have no relatives. Unless, of course, I am a LIAR. To each my own.

———————————

(((First of all I don’t want you to be afraid of NOTHIN that comes your way, not fear for the unknown nor fear of interacting with others in a pleasant manner. NOTHING matters if you’re not looking out for the number ONE (you). My advice is to JUST DO IT. That aside, I only got some basic shit to say but HOPEFULLY it will help you to organize your thoughts. This is gonna be long my bad

(1) Personally I think it’s a good idea to start by gathering the general aesthetics you want. Also personally, I tend to leave a lot of that TBD (to be discovered). But while that route offers flexibility, it can also lead to some momentary pursuits that you may regret later. Even the job description “loud and chaotic” has some guidelines.

(2) Idea: Think about how you want to go about characterizing your character. List some vocab words or concepts that reflect your intentions. Ex: Loud or passive? Sexy? Keeps-to-themselves, or assertive? If so, in what affairs? Naive? Pugnacious? Capable? Wordy, or laconic? Do they interact with others, or not much at all? Just keep that in mind as you do what you do.

(3) Idea: Think about what role YOU are going to play. For example, are you gonna break character a lot (y’know in those double parenthesis that people do when they’re just talkin as themselves), in the tags or otherwise? Or are you going to remain gloriously hidden behind the shroud of the screen, making your puppet appear the puppetmaster? The latter was my goal for this blog, I never wanted to get personally involved at all. I hate breaking character in these parenthesis because this is ZIM’S BLOG GODDAMNIT…but i still do it and that’s on me

Also: as it is your blog, think about your limits. If you have any, and if you want to be open about the fact that you exist, then feel free to list them in the bio or just keep them near. One good role that You play if you grant yourself a presence is the ability to moderate how others interact with you, by just lettin them know in the bio or the tags what’s what.

(4) Idea: Get your aesthetics in place! What kind of posts will you reblog - Productive or Puzzling? Visuals or texts? Does it matter? What will YOU post - words, pictures, stories, what? What would your character like? For example, I originally wanted this blog to reblog relevant posts, sometimes about aliens, but nothing good ever came up back then. Nowadays, ZIM here enjoys reblogging weird and out of context things (also Golden Girls) and making solitary textposts that serve as brief glimpses into the life of what must be a maniac. There is some continuity, but most things are said and then forgotten as the ferris wheel of his life whips him around for another go-around. Mostly, there is no logic to the madness. Think about what kind of vibe you want your characterization to give off, and let it develop over time.

(5) Idea: Decorate your blog! Think about what you want to convey. 

Ex: this blog is a HARSH red and purple and a simple, yet awful, icon. The header image is just what it is. the title and whatnot is bullshit. This effect (whatever it is) was better put together when the autoplay (an instrumental of Oingo Boingo’s “Weird Science,” aptly titled “ZIM’s Theme” on here) was functioning, but the youtube audio that I had used got taken down and this stupid idiot asshole website wouldn’t let me edit the autoplay with the replacement vid back into the html bc it “wasnt compatible” so eat my ass i guess…sorry y’all I miss it too

Note: see a busted ass autoplay could potentially serve a purpose, had i wanted the aesthetic to follow a more twisted, broken, dismissive route, but ZIM here is Cocksure and Loud and SEXY and he’s not broken it is YOU who is the bastard…so yeah don’t be afraid to get metaphorical if you want

(6) Idea: ask others more qualified than I. I’ve seen everybody do it differently. Some people keep a very organized tag system with who they interact with. Others have a specific way that they handle replies (reblogs, start a new post and @ them, reblogs but have a cut-off point…?). Maybe you’d like some extra input on that. Go ahead and ask. They’ll be happy to answer, they’re RPers, it’s their job to reply. Personally, my only limit is to stop the reblog chain when it becomes a burden to scroll past. Then ZIM @’s them if he wants to keep the arguementConversation going.

Note: I never considered this blog an RP blog - in my words, it’s a “shitpost blog” - so I’m sure that there are things (customs, norms, taboos maybe) that I just flat don’t know about, but, maybe not. Regardless, if you’re uncertain, just follow others’ examples. Human-zim counts as an example bc it’s a free internet (for now) and you can do what you want

(7) Idea: Hopefully you know what your intentions (or motives, or reasons) are. If not then find them now I guess. Also, hopefully one or all of them is to HAVE FUN. just show up one day and do shit and make others deal with you. Get comfy while one ancient purple-hued blog with a strenuously grinning icon and a busted autoplay scrolls past all that nonsense on their dash real quick while wondering whether they, too, should make a post that day or not..

also remember that it’ll be rough at the beginning as you’re trying to get a foothold on the blog/character, but you’re free to go in any direction you choose as time progresses. So don’t worry if you hate how you start out, it happens to the best of us.

 thanks for asking and I hope this helped xoxo….if anyone else has any input then don’t be afraid to add-on)))

[oh-ranpo]

Triangle || Two

Pairing: Harrison Osterfield x Reader, Tom Holland x Reader, TBD Summary: You were in love with Harrison, but when you find out Tom has feelings for you, how can you possibly choose? Word Count: 2.3k+

“Have you heard from Harrison today?”

Tom looked over at you as he fixed the button on his suit sleeve. You hated asking the question because you knew tonight was supposed to be about pushing thoughts of him from your mind, but you were worried. It was abnormal for Harrison not to send at least one funny text message in their group chat a day, and it was now almost 5:00pm and he had been silent.

“He’s probably just busy. You know Katie starts her new job on Monday, so he’s probably helping her get ready,” Tom replied. You noticed that he had avoided directly answering your question and you felt your chest tighten. You knew that Harrison was probably upset about the night before, but if Tom had heard from him, you couldn’t help but wonder if he was just mad at you. That didn’t make any sense, but you didn’t want to press it any further. Realistically, you didn’t want to know right now if you were the only one getting the silent treatment. Tonight was about charity and having a good time with Tom.

You had come over to Tom’s apartment to get ready, and you took another look at yourself in the full-length mirror. You and Tom had decided the night before that you would go with a dark purple dress, and he would have a black suit with purple accents. You admired the A-line gown as it sparkled in the light. It had cap sleeves, a glittery skirt, and rhinestone embellishments along the belt-line. Your hair was pulled up and to the side in an elegant bun, and your makeup was natural with just enough eyeliner to make your eyes pop. As you admired yourself, Tom appeared in the mirror behind you and smiled over your shoulder.

“You look fantastic.”

You smiled back at your friend and turned to get a good look at his outfit. His black suit was fitted almost perfectly, and his purple bow tie matched your dress. His curly, brown hair was swept back away from his face, and his brown eyes were bright as he looked back at you.

“Thanks, Thomas. You look quite dashing yourself,” you replied, brushing a hand across his shoulder lightly. “People won’t be able to tell whether you’re Spider-Man or James Bond.”

The smile on his face grew at your compliment and he stuck out his arm for you to loop yours through.

“Our ride should be here any moment. Are you ready?”

You nodded and when you reached the door, you leaned down to slip on your silver flats. Your matching silver clutch was sitting on the table next to the door, and Tom reached over to hand it to you. You gave him a small smile in thanks and the two of you made your way outside to the sleek, black car that was waiting for you.

For the first time all day, thoughts of Harrison were gone, and you could feel the nerves in your stomach. Being friends with Tom meant that you were constantly in the public eye, but there was something different about attending an event as his actual date. At other events, you could hang back with Sam, Harry, and Harrison and not have to worry too much about the paparazzi or reporters. Now, you were going to be under the spotlight with him. It was like until this point, you were a background character in his life- easily overlooked. Now, you were participating as one of the main characters and it was a little overwhelming.

The car ride to the hotel where the event was taking place was shorter than you would have liked. Your stomach was buzzing with butterflies now, and you couldn’t stop your hand from tapping nervously against your leg.

“There’s nothing to be worried about,” Tom murmured reassuringly, as the car came to a stop. Your heart felt like it was about to leap out of your chest as you saw the hordes of people waiting for you both to exit the vehicle.

“There are so many people out there.”

Your voice was quiet, but also a higher pitch than normal. You could feel every self-conscious doubt run through your head at once.

You are not cut out for this.

People are going to laugh at you.

What are you even doing here?

Your thoughts were immediately silenced as you felt a warm hand wrap around your own. You looked up and saw Tom smiling over at you.

“You’re gonna do great. It’s just a little walk down a small carpet. No big deal.”

The door to the car swung open, and Tom stepped out first. You could hear a roar of screams as the crowd laid eyes on him, and you felt your hand shake as he gently pulled you out behind him. He didn’t release his hold on you as he turned to lead you down the red carpet. Hundreds of flashing cameras greeted you, and you did your best to put on a believable smile that would mask the riot going on in your chest.

You were surprised to hear a few people call you by name, and you gave little waves to different people in the crowd. After about 10 minutes, you were starting to loosen up, and your smile had gone from forced to genuine. Every once in a while, you could feel Tom’s eyes on you as he checked to make sure that you were doing okay. You couldn’t help but notice that he still hadn’t dropped your hand from his, and you could only imagine the rumors that would be spreading like wildfire before the end of the night. Not that it would be the first time that you and Tom had been rumored to be an item.

By the time you had walked the length of the carpet and Tom had stopped to chat with various reporters, over an hour had passed. You felt flushed and slightly out of breath as the two of you stepped into the grand ballroom, but you also felt exhilarated. You had survived. Once inside, Tom finally dropped your hand and ran his fingers through his hair.

“See, that wasn’t so bad, was it?” he asked cheerfully, snagging a couple of champagne flutes off one of the trays a waiter was carrying. You took a sip of the bubbly and shook your head.

“It was actually kind of fun,” you giggled and Tom smiled over the edge of his glass at you. You took a moment to admire the room, and you were astonished at how elegant it was. There were donation tables spread out around the room, and everyone was chatting amongst themselves, the room giving off a relaxed atmosphere. There was a large white banner across the stage that had the name of the foundation written across it in giant gold letters. You didn’t know what you had expected from a charity event like this, but it felt right.

When you turned back to Tom, you saw that he was talking with a gentleman you didn’t know, so you took the opportunity to check your phone. As predicted, you could see that you were already tagged in several photos with Tom from just moments ago. You smiled at some of the captions claiming what a cute couple the two of you were and how excited people were to see Tom happy. You had always found it kind of funny that no matter who it was, if any girl stepped into public with Tom, they became a rumored couple. Why would you be any different?

You felt your stomach drop when you saw that there was still no word from Harrison, but you pushed your phone back into your clutch, also pushing away your disappointment. The man that Tom had been talking to was gone, and he turned his attention back to you.

“Let’s have a look around, shall we?” he proposed, as his hand found the small of your back and started leading you around the room. Throughout the rest of the night, Tom introduced you to some new people and the two of you drank merrily. You felt every ounce of sadness and anxiety from the past few weeks slip away as you allowed yourself to completely let go. The two of you ended up running into Zendaya and some of her friends at one point in the night and the group spent the evening talking and catching up.

The time seemed to pass faster than you realized, and before you knew it people had started to leave. You checked the time on your phone and saw that it was already almost midnight. Tom was laughing at something Zendaya had said, but you felt your stomach drop when you saw the text that was waiting for you. You checked the time stamp and saw that he had sent it over an hour ago and only consisted of four words.

You looked nice tonight.

Your eyebrows knit together in confusion as you double checked to make sure that he hadn’t sent it in the group text. It would have made more sense if it had been to both Tom and yourself, but his name was the only one that appeared at the top of the screen. Your brain had gone slightly fuzzy from the glasses of champagne you had consumed, so you didn’t stop yourself from sending a short reply back.

Thanks, Haz.

Just as you hit the send button, you could feel Tom peering over your shoulder.

“Was that from Harrison?” he asked, confusion etched in his voice. You turned slightly so that you could see his face and saw the same confused expression on his face that you had worn when you read the text originally.

“Strange, right?”

Tom’s eyes flickered between the screen of your phone and your eyes. His expression didn’t change, and he didn’t reply.

“What’s going on?” Zendaya asked, breaking the tension. Both you and Tom waved it off, but you could feel Tom’s mood shift.

“I think we’re gonna head out,” he said abruptly, giving all of his friends hugs goodbye and then turned to grab your hand. You waved goodbye to everyone and followed your friend back outside. Tom’s playful demeanor was gone and he didn’t say anything as you walked back towards the car. As soon as you were back in the vehicle, he removed his hand from yours but turned to face you.

“Did you have fun?” he asked quietly. His body was facing yours, but his eyes were on his hands. There wasn’t a smile on his lips anymore, and you were confused as to why he looked so self-conscious all of a sudden. Gently, you reached out and touched his knee. His eyes gazed down at your hand but didn’t lift to meet yours.

“Tonight was exactly what I needed. Thank you for inviting me, Tom.”

He looked up at you through his eyelashes, and you could see a smile returning to his face. The rest of the ride back to his apartment was spent in comfortable silence, and you could start to feel exhaustion flood your body. Your eyes slipped shut once, twice, and by the third time you couldn’t muster the energy to re-open them.

You didn’t feel yourself sliding against the seat, but when you were woken up a few minutes later by a hand gently shaking you, you found yourself leaning your head against Tom’s shoulder. You sat up quickly and looked out the window to see that you had arrived.

“Oh wow, I guess I should be getting home.” You mumbled as you stumbled out of the car. Tom quickly came around to steady you and wrapped your arm around his waist to lead you to his door.

“Or you can just stay here. I have the extra bed, and I don’t want you driving home when you’re this tired.”

“But I don’t want to sleep in this dress, and I didn’t bring a change of clothes,” you protested as Tom unlocked his front door, and you made your way inside.

“You can just borrow one of my shirts and pairs of shorts. Not like you haven’t before,” Tom replied as he released his hold around your waist and disappeared into his room to grab you something to wear before you could argue any further. Really you were thankful that you didn’t have to travel any further because, as you kicked your shoes off, your eyes started to grow heavy again and Tom’s guest bed was calling your name.

Tom returned a few minutes later, the top few buttons of his dress shirt undone and his suit jacket long forgotten. He held out a plain black t-shirt and a pair of his white athletic shorts for you to change into.

“Hopefully those work.” He rubbed the back of his neck as you took the clothes from his hand and shot him an appreciative smile.

“Thanks, Tom. I’m going to go change and then head to bed.” You leaned forwards onto your tiptoes to place a kiss on his cheek. “Thank you so much again for tonight. I had so much fun.”

You turned and started towards the guest room door just down the hall. With your back to him, you couldn’t see the small blush starting to form across Tom’s cheeks.

“Goodnight, YN,” he called after you.

“Goodnight, Tom,” you replied as you opened the guest room door and turned to give him one last smile. He then disappeared into his room, and you closed the door behind you. As soon as you were cuddled into the plush bed, you went over the events of the night in your head once again, purposely skipping over the text from Harrison. You really hoped that this wasn’t the last time that Tom invited you to an event like this one. It really had been the best night.

[satelliteinasupernova]

fic recs (featuring bughead)

PART 1!  LONG FICS

I was originally planning to do this all as one post with both long fics and one shots, but man this got long, and it’s only four recs.  BUT SOMETIMES YOU CAN’T STOP TALKING ABOUT FICS YOU LOVE.  Anyway, I wanted to share some fics that I have really emotionally bonded with.  There is a good chance you have heard of these, but in case you haven’t read them yet: here we go

I gotta put this under a cut, I swear I didn’t mean this to get this long:

Three Wishes by @nimmieamee (Complete)

Do you know that feeling when you start reading the first chapter of a fic, and by the end of the chapter you are just SO excited because it is everything that you didn’t know you wanted to read? That’s this fic for me. I had so much fun following it along as it updated. It takes all kind of twists and turns with each chapter!

Riverdale is honestly just made to work in universes that are just a bit weird, and the mirror verse concept of this fic uses the trope to its full potential. The chapters hop between Betty, Veronica, and Alice’s perspectives and each of their plot lines deal directly with their own personal flaws in a way that the series proper refuses to. When they end up in this other universe, they find themselves facing a version of themselves that is entirely different, but is still them, with the same desires and flaws, just developed and twisted in a different way. It forces them to come to terms with who they are and what they want, and each deciding if those goals are worth fighting for, if it’s something they need to change. I love fics that focus on complicated ladies so much!!

Taking the nonsensical, poorly written concepts of Riverdale and turning them around and developing them until they finally make sense is something that nimmie is especially good at in all her fics (I recommend you look into her full archive of fics btw). Here she really focuses on having Veronica face the repercussions of what siding with her father would do to Riverdale (even before the for-profit prison plot line showed itself!). A really serious look is taken to what a dark!Betty actually would look like, where Betty’s motivation with taking that direction comes from, and how Betty would interact if she did have a close relationship with the Serpents. It also helps Betty come to an understanding with the parts of Jughead’s life that she feels distant from, that she even feels is taking Jughead away from her. Then you have Alice, who has spent many years cultivating a specific image and a specific life, finding herself in the life she has never allowed herself, but secretly dreamed of. I know Alice/FP is not for everyone, but it is so great here. You get to see how they work as a support unit, even while living extremely messy lives, and continuing to make just questionable decisions, lol.

If you have not read this fic, please go read it! It does have Explicit content, and it is used in a way that builds on the characters and their relationships in a fun way. This fic deals with these flawed ladies, but really shows their strengths too, and makes me crave for a canon narrative that actually lets these characters grow.

road to me by @heavy-lies-the-crown (On going)

So how much you enjoy this fic may depend on how much you appreciate getting your heart broken over and over again. This fic HURTS. Brutally, and with regularity, but it still feels worth it because you know there’s a light at the end of the tunnel, lol. This fic deals quite seriously with the complications that form in relationships that start young, how it hurts when you are starting to grow out of your skin, but still find your relationships tethered by the person that you used to be.

It alternates between Jughead and Betty’s perspectives with each chapter, and what makes it so great as a fic is how deeply it gets into their heads. They both don’t have a good perspective of what is happening in their relationship and with their break up, they are too overwhelmed by how much it hurts and the confusion over what exactly did go wrong. The fic takes place over the course of the year, each chapter focusing on where the characters are at each month. It really does support the fact that this break up, even building back up to a relationship, is a process and a painful one. Even when the characters are hurt, even bitter, it is clear how much they love and are impacted by each other. The break up forces them to realize what was wrong, what wasn’t working, and what they want to change about themselves. Every choice and action they make is sensitive, because they are still trying to heal.

Just recently we have gotten to the months where Jughead and Betty are trying to build back a communication with each other, because now that the dust has settled, it hasn’t changed how much they miss or love each other. It is both heartwarming, but still difficult!

I have never read a fic in my life that has made me feel so extremely that I JUST WANT THESE TWO PEOPLE TO GET MARRIED lol. Like, really. Even when things are going wrong and Betty makes a selfish choice, or Jughead lets himself get completely swept up in hurt or anger. I just want these two to figure it out, and build a long-term life together.

(I am really really looking forward to the final chapters of this fic)

  girls girls girls in neon lights by @myrmidonofmelodrama / Em11134 (Complete)

I am desperate for real, honest Toni and Betty interaction. STARVING for it. The Betty Cooper & Toni Topaz tag on AO3 is one page, btw. ONE. This fic is everything I wanted. It takes place during ~the break up (the 2nd one), and has Betty and Toni building an alliance to change the Serpents.

This is how I want Betty to create a relationship with the Serpents, outside of her relationship with Jughead, instead forming bonds with the ladies within the gang (Ladies! Plural!).  Even though their interactions start tense and uncomfortable, Toni and Betty form a friendship pretty easily because they talk honestly and are able to relate to each other’s feelings.  Betty learns from Toni to broaden her own perspective while also getting support from her in her relationship with Jughead, while Toni is given the support to really take charge in changing the Serpents to be better, and to allow the female members of the Serpents gain the power and respect they deserve.

This fic gives so much care on really developing Toni, showing her perspective and letting her be her own person, while also building a relationship with Betty.  I love it, I love it so much.  I love how Toni functions as a great friend to both Jughead and Betty, but approaches the situation with a bit of humor and irony.  I love getting to watch Betty and Toni find the different things they admire in each other and building a real affection between them.  I live for it!!!  (More Betty and Toni content.  Thanks.  In the meantime, go read this fic)

  Vespertine by @yavannies

Okay, I put this one last of the long running fics, because I talk about it??? a lot??? (It might get annoying even, IDK) If for some reason you still haven’t read this fic yet, sit down and let me tell you why you should.

So I have a big weakness for narratives that play with perspective, especially ones that play with how people with different experiences view things. It’s shown up in all of the fics so far on this list, actually. The way Vespertine plays with this concept is by having an introduction of the fic from Jughead’s writing, often in relation to or in contract of the main fic from Betty’s perspective. I love it as a concept, and it works so well in execution.

In general, I haven’t been a big fan of fandom’s idea of Serpent Jughead, because it often presents him as a completely different person that he has been established as in series. Jughead as a Serpent is still the same kid from season 1, just now with a community of support in the Southside, so he has learned to be much more vocal about his problems with Riverdale. For this fic, Jughead and Betty’s different experience creates a lot of early conflict, and shows up in the different way they view the things happening around them. Even with that, there is a natural attraction between them that builds up as they are around each other, and as they end up helping with each other’s problems.

I could go on and on about this fic. The way it addresses Betty’s mental health realistically, the affection and care that is shown among the young Serpents, the slow build up and change in how Betty and Jughead learn to understand each other. It has just the right amount of leaning on good old high school movie tropes that it’s a really fun read.

It is the other fic on here that does have Mature content, and I honestly love how it is written. Sexual content is not something that I gravitate toward in fic, but I do really enjoy getting to see Betty learning to become comfortable with her sexuality, and to learn to be proactive in what she wants. There is almost a reverence in how Jughead treats any and every sexual encounter with Betty, and it’s just incredibly sweet. Jughead is not someone who always puts his thoughts into words, but even outside of his chapter intros, it is always clear by his actions what is important to him, or where his insecurity impacts him. When I can dissect what a character is thinking while viewing the interaction from the point of view of another character, that is what I deeply love reading.

This fic is almost done, and I know Yavannie will be glad to see it over, but honestly I will be really sad to see it end lol. (I’m really excited about her getting to move on to new projects though.)

I love these fics!  Go read them!

(I plan to share some of my beloved one-shots, TBD, at some point when I am bored at work again lol)

[mystery-moose]

BIG OL’ WIP LIST

List all the things you’re currently working on in as much or little detail as you’d like, then tag some friends to see what they’re working on.

I got tagged by @philosoverted, who has been wonderfully supportive of all her friends’ writing even when it’s for fandoms she isn’t even a part of. Because she’s fantastic.

I’m going to be kind of vague with some of these, though, because I like to preserve some semblance of surprise for anyone who happens to be following me for writing!

I’d put them behind a cut but apparently tumblr hates readmores right now? So instead I’ll just apologize for this long post that’s about to break your dash please i’m sorry it’s not my fault tumblr sucks eggs

AMatMMP

This is the direct sequel to Angus McDonald and the Flight of the Flying V. It is very long, not the longest thing I’ve ever written (yet) but certainly the longest thing I’ll have finished when it’s finally done. It’s also very complicated, because I like mysteries and plots and hate myself. I especially hate what I’ve done by setting it so close after the first one because it means I can’t write anything else with these characters until I’ve finished this.

But I swear to you and God and whoever is listening: this summer it’s happening.

Shelter

Think of everything I’ve ever written. Thematically and emotionally. Now, multiply it by a thousand and make it even more self-indulgent. You should have some idea of what Shelter is. It’s not plot-heavy (thank christ) and it doesn’t have any action or adventure. But it is everything I’ve connected with over the past year and a half, made into a single super-specific-to-me thing that stretches into a hazy future that I might never actually finish. But the fun thing is I don’t have to finish it, necessarily; I just want to write enough to get to the One Big Moment, the thing I’ve been thinking about since, oh, a year ago. That’ll act as enough of a catharsis that I can feel good about posting it, if I never end up finishing the rest.

Basically this is the epitome of me being Back On My Bullshit. I adore it. Someday soon, I hope to start posting it. Probably after AMatMMP, though.

Money and Fame (working title)

A few months ago I came up with a little adventure for Taako and Kravitz to go on. I really liked it at the time, but I waffled on writing it because I felt like... well, it involves Sazed, and I thought I might be being too charitable to him? But I haven’t been able to get a couple scenes of it out of my head, so it’s almost certainly getting written at some point. But it’ll likely be a much shorter, more focused thing than my usual plot-heavy junk. No flashbacks in this one, I don’t think!

The Lucretia Longfic (title TBD)

I got a bee in my bonnet last summer (thanks to @epersonae and her posse) and wrote, like, twenty thousand words of a Lucretia thing. I’ve since realized that it is Bad, and needs so, so much more time than I was giving it. It’ll happen at some point, I’m sure -- I like Lucretia too much to never finish it -- but it’s... she’s probably the best character with the strongest arc in the entirety of TAZ, and she deserves the best I’ve got, and my best so rarely feels like enough for her.

Candlenights

This is set after AMatMMP, so it’s getting finished after AMatMMP. It’s a meet-the-fam fic, with almost zero conflict whatsoever, but I’ve since realized it needs a different third act and I haven’t figured out how to end the damn thing. I’ve got a few thousand words for it already, but as soothing as I find writing it, this might not get finished for a while.

Fighting Words

This was gonna be a simple little series of one-shots for each of the THB (and maybe the IPRE) just gettin’ into some scraps. It’s still going to be that thing, but it’s just been set aside for a long time in favor of, uh, every other project I’ve got going. I’ll get back to it when I feel like posting something in short order, I’m sure.

The Great Taako-Burnsides Fight (title TBD)

I wrote a whole outline for a thing where Taako gets into a fight with Magnus about Lucretia, and then Magnus literally throws him out of his house and Taako feels really bad about it for like a week and Magnus fumes for a bit and then there’s a big ol’ forced sit-down with Lucretia and it’s yet another vision of mine for how Taako and Lucretia could ever, like, be okay again. It’s like the third version of this idea that I’ve plotted out (the Lucretia Longfic and Bygones being the other two) because apparently I’m just really into semi-forgiveness, as a concept. The funny thing? I’ve kind of settled on one that’s my personal “canon” for how it happens, and the other two are just AUs. I don’t normally do that! Normally when I establish a personal “canon” that’s all I write. TAZ has been really weird for me, in a lot of ways.

Anyway, it might get written at some point? It’s not super long, in the outline I’ve got. But there’s so many other things above it at this point, I think it’ll only happen soon if I get a real hankerin’ for it.

Cycle 95

This is a semi-follow up to Cycle 71, but it’s a different thing. The gang ends up on a planet where the Light is being held by a farming town terrorized by raiders, and have been bullied by them for generations. They have to help them fight the bandits to get the Light. (Taako is frustrated and suggests just taking it by force, but the townsfolk make it clear they would die fighting.) They end up training the townsfolk over the course of a year, defeat the bandits, and save the town. Their victory is an inspiration to surrounding communities, who create their own bands of protectors clad in red, and long after the IPRE has left, their legacy remains in the peace they create.

So this is straight up some Seven Samurai bullshit, because why not? The twist is that the town elder is something of a prophet, and as the IPRE train the townsfolk, he has a solitary moment with each of the seven in which he gives them advice that foreshadows what they’ll go through on Abeir-Toril. It’s not a lot, certainly nothing that changes how anything goes down, but I enjoy the cutesy foreshadowing and reassurance of who each character has developed into. (The only person who doesn’t get one is Taako. He avoids the elder like the plague. He gets his own moment, to himself.)

I will almost assuredly write this someday. Probably soon. It’s just so much fun to me. And it won’t be that long, either! Comparable to Cycle 71, I’d imagine. As with anything in the Stolen Century, I’d want to keep it short. There’s just too much room to lose yourself in that arc, any single year could be a hundred thousand words, and I just refuse to fall into that hole.

AMatItCJ (working title)

This is the “Angus at Neverwinter University solves a mystery with the help of his college buddies/Persona-style Investigation Team” and it is VERY loosely plotted but will almost certainly be VERY long and TOO complicated and I REFUSE to write it, do you hear me, I REFUSE.

(I’ve got character outlines and a basic plot and a few flashbacks and a final parlor scene and that’s basically it. I’ve actually thought about collaborating with someone on it, but I’m afraid I’d be too much of a control freak about it. This one might never happen.)

TaakoQuest (title TBD)

Kravitz is taken by a demonic entity anathema to the Raven Queen and is trapped inside a plane where no celestial entity or emissary can venture, purely to taunt her. Lup and Barry are helpless. Every other member of the IPRE and the founding Bureau is long dead. The Raven Queen asks Taako to do it. So he does.

This one literally came to me in the car ride home tonight, when I was thinking about Luster and how much I enjoyed the Taako-as-scientist scenes in that fic. I might write down some bits and pieces for it right now. It won’t be long. Maybe won’t even be multi-chapter. It’s just yet another exercise in showing Taako caring for other people through action, and in which he gets to act like a total baller.

I have very few settings, apparently.

This’ll almost certainly get written at some point, but maybe not soon. I’ve still got school stuff to do, but I like the bits I’ve thought of enough that I’ll almost certainly inflict them on you all at some point. But don’t worry, it won’t be nearly as emotionally harrowing as Luster. I can be cruel, but not THAT cruel.

THE ULTIMATE MOST SELF-INDULGENT GARBAGE EVER WRITTEN

I love Pyre.

I love schmoopy, slow-burn romance.

I will probably finish this someday.

I will never post it.

THAT’S IT

I’m almost certainly forgetting one or two, but I’m pretty sure that this is all I’ve got percolating in my head and WIP folder right now.

I’m sorry it’s so long, and I’m extra sorry I’m so bad at writing things regularly.

But I’m not sorry I don’t post things until they’re finished. I learn from my mistakes. I will never leave my readers hanging again!!

oh i guess i have to tag some people huh

uhhhhhhh @orchidcactus @fistfulofgammarays @anonymousalchemist @marywhal aaaaaaaand @emi--rose

TELL ME YOUR SECRETSSSS

[frankensteined]

Joseph bc I don't know who that is

i don’t get to talk about him all that often because he gets tangled up in a lot of side plots in my Big Thing i’m writing him for, and i’ve never actually RPed him ever???? unlike literally everyone else that i tag often! but he’s That Character with the secret past that’s so secret that even he doesn’t know about it, so when he finds out about it it wrecks his whole life and turns it upside down, basically. (like in a sci-fi cyberpunk au thing he’d be the obligatory “android who doesn’t know he’s an android” character, for example)

i did include him in that weird OC “tag urself” meme that i made for you the one time! he’s jojo (which is actually an in-universe nickname that jules gives him at one point /fun facts), but i really should tag him more/write more for him bc he’s fun and has a fun dynamic with my other OCs, which means that he probably would also have a fun dynamic with other people’s OCs

B A S I C S

full name: joseph rhee!

gender: male

sexuality: bisexual

pronouns: he/him

O T H E R S

family: john rhee (father), june rhee (mother), aaron rhee (brother), erik rhee (brother) 

birthplace: that’s ~spoilers~, but he believes that it’s seattle

job: idk he’s rich (he’s that typical “anonymous benefactor” character tho)

phobias: he’s admittedly a bit claustrophobic and not wild on heights. so. have fun on airplanes, buddy.  

guilty pleasures: romcoms, i am pained to admit. also: being petty

M O R A L S

morality alignment?: chaotic neutral

sins - lust/greed/gluttony/sloth/pride/envy/wrath

virtues - chastity/charity/diligence/humility/kindness/patience/justice

T H I S - O R - T H A T

introvert/extrovert: extrovert

organized/disorganized: organized! even though it doesn’t look it!

close minded/open-minded: open-minded

calm/anxious: anxious, but in that “screaming internally” but cool on the outside kind of way

disagreeable/agreeable: generally quite agreeable, but can be a bit of a shit sometimes, though

cautious/reckless: reckless

patient/impatient: impatient

outspoken/reserved: outspoken

leader/follower: follower

empathetic/unemphatic: empathetic

optimistic/pessimistic: optimistic 

traditional/modern: modern, i guess

hard-working/lazy: he’s hard-working but it’s pretty behind-the-scenes so he looks lazy if you don’t see what he’s up to

R E L A T I O N S H I P S

otp: i don’t know!!! i think, of all the OCs i’ve developed so far, he’d be the best to pair up with newt, but tbh i haven’t explored that much! this is TBD

(this is hard to say primarily because newt ships easily with a lot of people and other folks’ OCs so joseph’s kind of a latecomer on that front!) 

ot3: him and the truth and coming to terms with the truth, for now.

...that being said, he’d definitely be a good character for a polyship, so i’ll leave that door open for now, too

brotp: him and his brothers, for sure, but him and conrad kinda bond a bit too

notp: probably him and jules, tbh, because he doesn’t appreciate nicknames or people teasing him about being rich, and jules is all about both those things. they don’t hate each other at all, but there’s nothing there between them either.   

[junker-town]

AEW Dynamite featured two wrestlers running someone over with a golf cart. It was perfect.

Wrestling is the best when it’s super weird, just like this.

James Dator and Hector Diaz love watching wrestling. Whether its a technical match or a weird bout that doesn’t even take place in a wrestling ring, they’ve probably watched their fair share of them. Here, they discuss their thoughts on this week’s All Elite Wrestling Dynamite and NXT.

James Dator: So, I kinda want to start with that main event on AEW last night. I know it’s weird to start with a main event — but I can’t stop thinking about it.

Hector Diaz: It was a chaotic mess in the best way. From the start, I was pleasantly surprised to see both Sammy Guevara and Kenny Omega commit to the street fight bit by wearing the proper attire for the stipulation — a t-shirt, jeans, and kneepads over those jeans.

JD: Agreed. The whole match just oozed character, which is perfect for what it was. At this point I think AEW know the strengths of Jericho and Matt Hardy are in their character work/moment building, so having Kenny and Sammy do the bulk of the work allowed the older guys to make big moments. Like stuffing Matt in the freezer, Jericho getting hit by Pineapple Pete and of course, RUNNING OVER SAMMY WITH A GOLF CART.

HD: One day, Sammy Guevara is going to be the unstoppable heel AEW Champion. But until then, I’m going to enjoy him getting beaten up for our entertainment. That whole segment with the golf cart was an example of pro wrestling being art. Just look at this screenshot. Omega’s eyes are bulging, Matt Hardy’s hair is menacingly waving in the air looking like he’s Dr. Robtonik from the Sonic the Hedgehog games, and all poor Sammy can do is look back and run away from the inevitable. If you showed this video to me with the Benny Hill song playing in the background, I would have just assumed that’s how it was intended to be viewed.

JD: Yes! Honestly, I’m looking forward to Sammy taking over — but I like they’re slow rolling him so far. No need to push him too fast too quickly at his age, but honestly I’m hoping all this means we get Darby vs. Sammy in that ladder match at their next pay-per-view, Double or Nothing. So if we assume the card so far is:

Brodie Lee vs. Jon Moxley for the AEW Championship

Cody vs. Lance Archer for the TNT Championship

Chris Jericho vs. Matt Hardy in an Elite Deletion Match (please make it happen)

Nyla Rose vs. TBD for the AEW Women’s Championship

MJF vs. Jungle Boy

Kenny Omega and Hangman Page vs. Evil Uno and Stu Grayson

No. 1 contender ladder match

How do you feel about that card?

HD: I feel pretty good about it considering that most of these AEW Dynamite episodes have been taped and there’s only been a handful of storylines with the smaller crew. I’m looking forward to seeing what the TNT Championship looks like around Lance Archer’s waist, because there’s no chance Cody is winning that, right? The Murderhawk Monster is relatively new to AEW, but he’s supposed to be the new hoss. It would be a shame if he lost his first major match on pay-per-view.

I’m also looking forward to seeing who the No. 1 contender to the AEW Women’s Title will be. My guess is that Hikaru Shida will take on champ Nyla Rose. I do wish they built up more animosity for the women’s championship matches in the same way they’re building up the TNT championship. Having the match be solely about the championship is fine, but including some personal beef makes it even better.

Which match are you looking forward to the most?

JD: If the Jericho vs. Hardy match happens, it’s that by a mile. But, of the stuff we KNOW, it’ll be that ladder match. That is the wild card in all this for me. It really depends on who’s in it. I’m hoping for Darby Allin, Pac, or Sammy. But as far as rankings I know MJF is due as well. I’m just a little worried that style of match won’t suit him and it’ll make him look weaker than it should.

At this point we haven’t seen Lance Archer do much in terms of a long match either — so I’m hoping that he vs. Cody gives people a chance to see how good Archer is in the ring.

Cody has to win that match, right?

HD: We’ll have to agree to disagree on the Cody-Lance Archer match. But speaking of the ladder match, we haven’t seen the Lucha Bros, Pentagon Jr. and Rey Fenix, in a minute. They would definitely do some damage in that match, especially after what they did with The Young Bucks in the Escalera De La Muerte match at All Out last summer.

JD: It’s been kind of nice having a few Dynamites without the Bucks and Lucha Bros. A real “absence makes the heart grow fonder” situation. We had so many weeks seeing them in a row I’m craving seeing them have another big-time match.

HD: You can say that about most of the tag division too, with the exception of the Best Friends. SCU has been chilling at home in sunny Southern California and so have Luchasaurus and Jungle Boy of Jurassic Express. TH2 and Private Party have made appearances on The Young Bucks’ YouTube show, but we haven’t seen them in the ring either. I can’t wait to see what happens in the tag team division, especially after a certain tag team was released of their WWE contracts not too long ago.

JD: The tag division is SO STACKED. It makes me almost hope they introduce trios titles to break up the roadblock there. Give a place for guys like SCU, Jurassic Express, Private Party (maybe with Janela?) to shine away from the big tag teams.

HD: And we haven’t even mentioned the best tag team with the best name: DEATH TRIANGLE aka TRIANGULO DE LA MUERTE. I’m pumped.

JD: Yes! So last on AEW now: Does Pineapple Pete go over vs. Jericho next week?

HD: I hope so! And I hope it happens with the help of a 3,000-year-old Damascus interfering via the vessel of Matt Hardy. We need more absurd wrestling.

JD: So ... I have to admit I didn’t watch NXT yet. Did you?

HD: I have not, but I did see Karrion Kross’ amazing entrance. It’s already one of the best ones in WWE and I’m frightened every time Kross screams. Let’s hope that mystique sticks around.

JD: I’m so here for this. I love everything about it.

[tirkdi]

Raven Stratagem Meme

Okay, I publicly said I’d do this meme and then I essentially neglect-cannoned the whole thing. I was trying to make an edit of Nirai Kujen and then it turned out terribly and ... well. Here we are. 

Also, idk if this is happening for anyone else, but searching for multi-word tags doesn’t seem to be working for me for the last few weeks? The words get connected by an OR rather than assuming that it’s a continuous tag so that searching for ‘#ninefox gambit’ just returns anything that has the tag ‘ninefox’ OR ‘gambit’ ... anyway. If anyone knows how to keep that from happening please tell me because I miss looking for posts about tiny fandoms. 

But HERE WE GO, squeezing in my answers to many of the meme questions in the last few hours before Raven Stratagem is available to the world. All of it under a cut because spoilers for 9fox!

favorite character: I wish this were someone other than Kujen, but it is not. Kujen may not have the highest bodycount in the book (or he may! TBD I guess) but he is definitely the baddest and I am psyched to be reading a character who is an actual sociopath – let alone a sociopath who loves fancy clothes. 

favorite character that only appeared for one scene and who’s probably dead by the end of the book: Okay confession time – I didn’t really care for these scenes. On the reread I kept wondering why they were there – Yoon Ha Lee said I think that it was to give more of a sense of the world (and it does), I just ... they weren’t my favorites. Probably my favorite is the weapon repairers because it was all so bureaucratic and I am a sucker for space bureaucracy.

…most interesting faction (not favorite): I am so curious about most of the factions and reeeeeally looking forward to seeing how they play out. The most pressing question I have is how the Nirai have Kujen has their hexarch for a gazillion years. 

top Extra thing that Jedao does: THE LUCKSTONE SCENE OOOOOOOOMMMMMGGGGGGGGGG CAN YOU EVEN. And it’s all brought together by that line at the very end – “At the risk of alienating you forever, I have to point out that you lost the moment you agreed to play the game on my terms, without negotiating.” Cold, Jedao. As Kujen would say: Just what is it that runs in your veins?

favorite quote favorite quotes: 

“The point of war is to rig the deck, drug the opponent, and threaten to kneecap their family if they don’t fold.” 

“Remember that despite the fact that I’m a traitor and a mass murderer, one of us is expendable, and it isn’t me.”

The knife was sharp in the way of bitter nights.

The silence could have swallowed a star.

“Calendrical Minutiae: Year of the Fatted Cow, Month of the Partridge, Day of the Hedgehog, I need to program some macros, and fuck the hour.”

“Are you trying to pass off a massacre of your own soldiers as a pedagogical exercise?”

Everyone thinks of the Shuos as the sneaky snailfuckers, but the Andan are so damn affable and charming and fun to be around up to the point where they stab you in the kidneys.

“Dead is dead, Cheris. Do you think it makes any difference whether you’re killed by a knife in the back or a bullet?”

savagely correct courtesy

“I once had someone swerve her tank out of our column and straight into a house. With a very large basement. Because she was too sleep-deprived to think. It’s funny now, but it wasn’t funny then. -- Oh, who am I kidding, it was hilarious, even if it was kind of a disaster. I laughed so hard my aide almost shot me.”

“Go fuck a power socket, Captain,” Ragath said, without heat, and signed off.

“I don’t mean sociopath values of crazy.” The corner of [Kujen’s] mouth tipped up for a moment. “I know what I am.”

“I can slaughter the math on my own.”

any ship! all the ships: Nerevor/Cheris. That’s really my only moth ship. If Cheris liked men more I could get behind Cheris/Jedao, and I could even believe Kujen/Jedao happened a few times in the Black Cradle (whatever the heck that looks like). I really want Nerevor/Cheris to have happened in book 1 – I’m not sure how it could possibly work later, though I hope Yoon Ha Lee is nice enough to make it a possibility by book 3 :)

wild guesses at Raven Stratagem’s plot Raven Stratagem’s plot if it was total fanservice just for me: KUJEN BLOWS TONS OF STUFF UP! Cheris/Jedao BLOW THINGS UP IN RETALIATION! The Andan appear and stab everyone in the kidneys. The universe collapses around Nerevor, who has fully recovered her memory, and Cheris as they share one beautiful kiss. For some reason, Shuos Mikodez is there. 

scene that Should Have Happened: Cheris/Nerevor before she got reverted to fledge null. Reversion’s scheduled for the morning, Nerevor shows up at Cheris’s door while she’s watching terrible dueling dramas ... Jedao has to be there so Cheris almost balks because he can’t not watch but he refuses to stand in the way of it and she finally relents and makes him swear to never mention it ever again not ever not even once.

scene you hope will happen in Raven Stratagem: CHERIS FIGHTING KUJEN!!!! Oh man, I want to see that so bad. I also want the plot to work to set up Nerevor/Cheris for book three. :)

[wavemasterryx]

All the writing projects i’ll probably never finish.  i don’t know why anyone would want to hear about them, but i guess if you’re /that/ bored, enjoy.  Oh, right, there’s also going to be massive spoilers in most cases, if that’s something you’d worry about.

Also, don’t worry about how much progress i might have made on actually working on one of these instead of writing up all of this.  The answer is “none”, because this is not writing, it’s depression-fueled babble.

---

01) Sunny Hoof: Thy Music Too

Small story continuing the series with amputee Blackjack and nightmare Glory, attending the Nightmare Night festivities in Chapel.  i  think Blackjack’s costume was going to be Bowser, so that she could conveniently disguise her wheelchair as his flower-copter thingy, but i don’t remember who Glory was going to be.  It was either going to end up being the two of them sneaking off to bang in the haunted house, or a not-lewd double date with LittlePip and Xenith; i never did decide.

---

02) Sunny Hoof: TBD

Another small story taking place during Chapel’s Running of the Leaves festival (admittedly, not nearly as much running as old Equestria, considering at least half the population has some sort of disorder or disability).  Rather than Blackjack, this one would actually be centered on RedEye and Ilaris having a very casual walk (wagon ride) through the orchards, pure silly fluff.

---

03) Project Horizons the First Movie

Something of a difficult position, this idea takes place after the events of Chapter 77, but before the Epilogue is set in motion.  I mean, in anime it’s very common for movies to happen that are completely non-canon to the show but take place withing a specific time-frame relating to the show, i guess that’s what i was really banking on.

Anyways, the basic idea is that as rebuilding is finally getting underway, a well-intentioned alicorn happened across (or was given by someone...) a document leading her to an ancient shrine of phenomenal power.  Using this power, she wishes “all the good people who were claimed by the Wasteland, within the memory of the living” to be returned to life.  The spirits warn her that she should bring back the not-good as well, but she insists on not undoing everyone’s hard work saving the world, to which the spirits concede, leaving her with a warning that there will be a price.

This price comes in the form of four “Aspects of Suffering”, pure evil taking the form of the (very common in anime) four celestial beings, and seeking to bring pain and misery back to the world.

In essence... it’s just a series of excuses: to bring everyone back to life that deserves to have a happier ending; to have a series of cool, flashy battles, without the potential for everyone dying; and to get some particular scenes that i really want to happen... like Primera threatening / trying to seduce Pip with a choking Homage (something about “i’ll beat her record and make you scream 33 times” ), P-21 and Rampage returning to Equus via rocket, which they land on top of one of the big bads, and Cuarta being all smug and mocking everyone right before she (and the building she’s standing on top of) gets tagged ‘it’ by Puppysmiles.

The story would end with the aspects being defeated somehow... and then a hard “defeat equals friendship”, with Blackjack giving them a chance to do better, much to /everyone’s/ dismay.

---

04) Project Horizons the Second Movie 

Taking place shortly after the first movie, things would seem to be going pretty well with the rebuilding.  It would be pretty slice-of-life for the first few chapters, with gradually more hints that something else was going on as certain ponies begin mysteriously disappearing for increasing lengths of time; including Dawn.

A search would reveal they’d fallen into a trance and in some secluded location had begun building some kind of portal.  Either the work would be just finishing as it was found, or letting it proceed so they could find out what was behind it... the portal would lead Blackjack and a large strike force to one of the other planets in the Equus system, where they would find themselves in a mechanical nightmarescape, created by fragments of Cognitum.

Naturally, they would need to stop her resurrection, and wipe her blight from existence for the final time.

---

05) Project Horizons the Third Movie

Compared to the other two... this idea is more of the pure silly fluff that should be expected of me.  i don’t recall if i had decided how or why, but the basic idea was that something had happened to shift the world to an alternate reality where a large portion of the population is foals.  There would be kindergarten shenanigans, shopping trips and cooking with mama Boo, and all kinds of likewise absurdly and unnecessarily cute things.  Also unlike the other two, i have no conclusion in mind for this one... maybe there could be two versions, one where they go back to normal and one where they don’t?

---

If i somehow had enough money to commission Somber to write these...  i wouldn’t... cause there’s no way he should have to write stories with ideas as bad as these.  Not that i wouldn’t be tempted anyways... out of morbid curiosity i do wonder how much it would cost for him to consider it...

Unfortunately, they’re definitely too complex for me to be able to handle on my own.  i know, it will be hard, but you’ll have to struggle through the disappointment.

---

06) Boo Quest: the Chrysalis Building

A slight re-imagining of the story i had intended to have behind my farce of an attempt at running a “choose your own adventure” thing on Boo’s tumblr.  i’m sure some people were curious what was waiting on the top floor...

It would definitely not involve any voting for this incarnation though, it would just be a straightforward story to be told of what happened on her adventure.

---

07) Fallout Equestria: Botsunyu

The first of my ideas for a full-fledged independent side-story, directly ripped off and or a homage to Resident Evil... 5.  i think.  It would feature a 3-person squad of NCR recruits investigating the hulk of a ship which had been sent on an exploratory mission to Neighpon, only to drift back into Manehattan bay after several months without contact.

On reaching the ship, they find the remains of some of the crew, but mostly a large amount of strangely fleshy tumorous cocoons (or possibly crystalline, if i want them to be less horrifying).  In the course of attempting to salvage the ship, the team would encounter and try to deal with the hatchlings of the colossal nautilus / parasitic wasp starspawn which attached itself to the underside of the vessel.

The story would end with the destruction of the ship, but how many of the team survive, and if they actually manage to defeat the starspawn or not, i’m not certain.

---

08) Fallout: Neighpon

More of an exercise in world building than anything, this idea was a to be centered around the daily life of a ninja scout in training and her hunter-tracker best friend.  Both are orphans, their home villages having been almost totally wiped out by the massive starspawn monstrosities that inhabit the island nation.

i had also considered a variant of this same idea but with more generic characters, to emphasize the world instead of my bad character designs.  Not that the world design is really all that much more remarkable.

---

09) Fallout Equestria: Deepest Dark

Probably the idea i’ve talked about the most before... centered on a structural engineer living in a vault dedicated to deep core mining operations.  The idea is based on Dead Space, Alien: Isolation, and other such horror games... that the stable’s mining runs into something as it progresses deeper... never quite pinned down what.  Some kind of primordial evil, monster from another dimension...  i’d vaguely considered it actually being Sombra’s horn, but thinking about it more now, that actually seems like the least threatening of the ideas.

This story would involve a lot of violence, and potentially end with the entire stable, including the protagonist, being wiped out.

---

10) A Bleach Love?Story: EIRS

The only large story project i’d ever actually finished, and then i had to go and extend it...  It’s probably the story i would like most to complete, if just because my mom really wants to find out how it ends...  She’s literally the only one though; my other two “fans” disappeared when the [Adult Swim] forum died, and there’s no way i could reach them now...  If i ever did manage to finish it though, there would be an issue of what to do with it... since posting it here wouldn’t really accomplish anything other than making another post for people to scroll past.  The only other places i really frequent only service furries, so even if written works were more valued there, i wouldn’t be able to post it.

Anyways... the story itself...  i actually know more or less exactly what i want to happen, but i’ve completely lost pace with the style that i wrote it in, so it puts me somewhat on edge about how big the difference in styles is.

The villain of this season is borrowed from Digimon, and is slowly eating the entire multiverse, erasing anything it consumes from time, so that it was like it had never existed.

i actually had the next chapter halfway done when i stopped writing...  It was going to be the big hint of what’s going on...  Then the chapter after that the D-Reaper was going to make its first big attack on the Enterprise away team, allowing me to bring in a cameo from the first season that i was really hoping to use (redeemed villains for the win), and letting them just narrowly escape.  Third chapter it would attack the Enterprise, and then only Data would be left to find the answer in the final chapter.  Which there is one, i actually have the scene almost entirely planned in my head... except that it’s kinda... a really controversial idea, that i don’t know if it would come across as too disrespectful, even though i don’t mean anything bad by it at all...

The ending i had in mind was Data (ironically played by a Jewish actor, which i didn’t remember until way after i planned this...) retrieving the Ark of the Covenant from the Nazis, and then using it to politely ask God (played by Lelouch Lamperouge) to restore the multiverse.

To me... it’s a perfectly logical and thematically appropriate way to end the story... actually the only ending that really makes sense...  But i don’t want to insult anyone with it, it’s just supposed to be silly fun with a small side of heartwarming, and i know religion can be a super sensitive issue... so that’s a big problem for me.

It’s so close to being finished, which makes it really quite sad...

---

11) TBD: Mercenary Pony Adventures

Really the most ambiguous of all my ideas... it’s something of a catchbasin for all my failed RPG character ideas... a seven-element wizard, a slime wizard, a combat maid, and possibly the two (prospective) main characters from Fallout: Neighpon.  It would requite a lot of inter-personal interaction to drive it, between quests...

---

12) Space-Thriller

Super casual space exploration and possibly light adventure fluff, centered around a young alien slug-girl.

Based on an RPG system i’ve tried a few times to create, but it’s never worked out because i am terrible at balance.  In this same general idea, i would also love to do a story about the adventures of the HMLV Destiny or the smaller and much more reasonable HMCV Raven (101 and 20 pony crews, respectively), but i don’t have any more confidence in writing their stories than i did in running the campaigns that they were part of...

---

13) Pokemon: Milk & Honey

i have spent an unnecessarily large amount of time creating my own ‘version’ setting within the Pokemon world; this story reflects how events in the game would take place if the NPC (Red, Ash, etc) were playing rather than the player.  Or if it were an anime instead of a game.

i’ve been told that stories of Gym challenge journeys and fighting against a region’s evil team are some of the worst fanfiction you could possibly do for Pokemon (maybe second only to running a scarf shop), but i mean... it’s kinda an important step in establishing characters, isn’t it?...

So yes... the story would follow the two protagonists as they travel through the region, battling, training, and growing closer as they reach for their dreams together.

With all the planning i’ve put into it already, i probably have a reasonably serviceable outline for the potential story... but actually writing it is another matter entirely...

Plus there’s the added problem that... the plan is supposed to be for the female protagonist to be incontinent as a result of her quite meager psychic power interfering with her body’s natural development.  i really want it to be a super casual part of the story, like not a big deal at all so that it doesn’t interfere with anything... but then i’m an idiot and go tying it and her mental health to several key plot points and well...  i don’t know how many times i need to say i’m a bad writer before people believe me. 

---

14) Pokemon: Milk & Honey, TBD

Following a rather large battle at the end of the main storyline... the two protagonists are invited by the Pokemon League to take a job in it as special investigators.  While they patrol the entire region regularly, they are also responsible for keeping an eye on the “Dreamers Network” a vast virtual reality system that is growing steadily more popular since its debut.

When users start turning into Pokemon, and coming out of the VR sleep acting like they are still those Pokemon, it’s up to the protagonists to track this brainwashing back to its source; a small clinic on a private server, and find some way to put a stop to it.

Oddly enough... this side-story is actually based on a dream i had way back when i first started plotting out and working on this world.  Most of it has faded, except for one very strong scene...  The male protagonist staring up at his partner on a floor above, being wheeled away by a nurse as she’s begging for him to shoot her [with a special gun that would disconnect her from the network and potentially completely wipe her memory], because she doesn’t want to risk the treatment making her do anything wrong.  It still plays quite vividly in my head, even nearly 6 years later.

i believe my intention was for it to be a human-form Sableye or Espeon behind everything, trying to extract vengeance for someone (probably their trainer) who they had cared about greatly and lost...  Or maybe a Mesprit draining away positive emotions in order to feed them into their close friend who only exists as a remnant on the network.  Or something like that.

---

15) Pokemon: Bunkatsu Village 

A version of the Pokemon world without humans, this story takes place a decade or two after a comet / space ship carrying an alien virus crashed into the planet.  The virus infested and altered everything, the only pockets of normalcy being small villages like Bunkatsu that are surrounded by a powerful barrier; the result of part of the “Legendary Heroes” final effort to save the future.  Pokemon in these villages are trained to be adventurers and head out into temporarily stabilized pockets of the outside world to search for resources, treasure, and (hopefully) the eggs of the fallen heroes.

---

16) Build a Perfect Blitzle

This story would have been the first in a potentially lengthy series of dirty stories, serving as something i could finally use as an outlet for everything i enjoy that makes me a bad person.  It would entail someone being held by “Build Corp.” (voluntarily or otherwise) and being put on a livestream feed where every day the viewers would vote on a set of options put forward by the stream’s “sponsors”.

While actual voting would have been nice, i decided that using a dice to choose randomly would work fine, and so using a list of all the things i like, i could come up with a satisfying simulation of adding torment after torment to whatever poor characters ended up being chosen.

This seemed like a really nice idea at first... but it started getting to me that there’s literally no one i could share it with... so there was no reason to write it, since it could only turn out worse than it exists in my head already.  i actually even finished some of the first trial with Kino, and it didn’t seem half bad (as much as it wasn’t long enough to be bad yet), but yeah...

The idea really had some potential... so many different things that could happen, and the ways options might interact with each other... and new and different kinds of volunteers...  It really could have been fun.

---

17) Other

A few other random ideas i’ve considered at one time or another, but would be significantly less likely to attempt than anything listed above:

Something with my ponies from World of Warcraft.  Perhaps a history, or travel journal to be serious... or lacking that... more silly slice-of-life stuff.  There’s also some potential for naughty things with a few of the characters (seems to be a running theme with this section), but some would be too tempting to involve certain NPCs, which is a big “no no” according to tropes...

A fetishy but possibly not explicit story involving an alchemist zebra of mine and a friend’s pony, as part of an ongoing series they’ve been writing for them.

Or.. trying to write the exceedingly inappropriate story ideas i’d wanted to commission of my dumb bunnies.

[gruntadminloch-moved]

((venting post tbd it’s okay i talk myself through it this is literally stream of conscious you can just watch me think myself through something if you read this which is probably hilarious but also probably very not just ignore this i’ll actually delete this unlike everything else i tag tbd i swear

whenevr i consider reblogging like a ‘give my muse a nightmare’ meme or something similarly darker like that to explore that side of Loch or just any other side of him because i’ve explored like maybe a fifth at best

I feel like “yeah well you’re too new. people don’t know enough about loch to pull that off.” (disregard that i’ve been here what a month at this point? i answered an ask about things that trigger him and also included some fears in there?? loch’s pretty simple you can also take a wild guess based on ‘he REALLY likes kissing guzma’s ass’)

(also, hey, danie, why don’t people know more about loch? because you haven’t been doing your tags dipshit! why don’t you do those? clearly you want to! anxiety?? poor attention span??? well shit can’t do much about that now can we.)

at the same time some people reblog those and get silly/funny ones or general ones so. it wouldn’t hurt to do that.

I also feel bad doing memes when i could be doing proper tags. memes just come quick and easy. but it’s not really the right way to share info about the character rather than y’know actually playing him y’know? but i also feel bad about not posting so much when i’m in a rut like this. i should stop feeling bad because everyone tells me that it’s fine and not to feel bad but i don’t /shrug

unrelated vomiting warning obvs not for me tho but that’s a delicate thing for some people but my dad’s throwing up again which is great can’t do anything about that either

can’t do anything in general lol

I’m actually getting a tag done right now!!  unfortunately there are 30+ more waiting after that somet hat will probably be dropped for timing reasons but i wanna reply anyway to show that i’m still interested

just

blaah i suck /shrug

idk how i did this before idk how i was part of even ran a whole kind of indie multiverse space in the past i guess i had less on my mind and less to do i didn’t have a job i didn’t have to take care of my dad i was slightly more mentally healthy than before

just

i have so many excuses but i hate having excuses i feel like they’re never enough or they’re not well understood or just that everyone ELSE can power through their excuses wh can’t I????

(a lot of those people have meds or support systems or otherwise self that’s why. there are lots of reasons you’re you and you need to stop comparing yourself to other people it’s not HELPING it makes things WORSE and you’ve gotta stop making things worse for yourself because it just makes things harder for you)

i wonder if i’d feel better if i got things done but those things can be done whenever y’know? like the pile of laundry on my floor doesn’t feel as pressing as tags i’ve been sitting on for weeks. sure rl comes first but once i throw those in the washing machine i can just walk away and it’ll take care of itself. this is osmething i actively have to do

then again that’s the kind of logic that says it’s a priority. it’ll take five seconds. hell maybe i’ll do it now and feel like i did something. sweep up the rice i spilt on the floor earlier and feel a little better. hang up my clothes that’ve been sitting in my laundry basket for weeks and have stuff done. just the thought(or maybe the rambling) makes me feel a little less tense would you look at that

okay. i have a tag half done. i’m gonna finish it and queue it and then put some stuff in the laundry. do another(or part of another), hang up some clothes. yeah i can do that. good talk self you're gonna be fine

and y’know what once you do a few things reblog a meme or make a headcanon post or something. you’ve got this. you can earn things for yourself

feel like you’re gonna cry? that’s fine. go ahead and cry. whenever it comes. maybe listen to pikachu’s goodbye that used to make you cry all the time it might help get it out. you’re all manner of pent up and you need to pull yourself together

your arms might feel tense from restlnessness--adhd isn’t just being foregetful and distracted you get restless and angry and fidget too and you’ve been kind of still since you sat down to type. your body wants movement and activity besides using your hands and fingers. use them or flail around do some wall pushups or something. you’re gonna be fine. it’s amazing how nice it feels to talk to yourself sometimes and talk yourself through things. maybe it’s just because i know how to do that, talk through things. i just never have the time to really tell myself to do it

it’s especially nice to be able to look up from the keyboard and see it addressed to me. like. hey you. me. self. you’re gonna be alright. things’re gonna be fine. nothing in particular is the matter but everything is also the matter and that’s okay because it won’t be the matter forever!!! you just gotta work through it

thanks me. you’re not bad at that. you hear that a lot actually. you don’t mean to project that way when it comes to loch but you do. hopefully when you pick up other characters you can keep your self to yourself.

okay! enough typing!! time to get to work!!! /cutsey flexy emoji