#8 bit space

[marshmallowprotection]

Think of how much WORSE it would have been in saeyoungs route when he first runs into saeran if he didnt have that plausible deniabilty of saerans hair and eye color being different. Yikes

Oh, you are in the mood to make me cry, aren't you? Because, as we know, the first time the twins encounter each other face-to-face in Yoosung and Saeyoung’s Route after years of separation, we have no choice but to watch Saeyoung not recognize his brother right away.

Granted, part of the reason why he doesn't recognize his brother doesn't just have to do with the fact that his brother doesn't look the same as he once did, it's because the very last thing he expects to encounter in the organization that has been trying to destroy his Safe Haven— is his brother.

Why would Saeran be in Mint Eye?

Saeran was supposed to be safe somewhere thanks to Jihyun and Rika.

Not here.

Never here.

Yoosung's Route:

Saeyoung's Route:

There's a part of me that knows if he realized it was his brother right away, it would have sent him into a downward spiral that destroyed him emotionally. He always shuts down when he realizes what has been done to his brother. It's one thing when he's bouncing between deniability and actuality, but if there is nothing to deny, then he has to accept that he was lied to, and the only thing that happens when he has that realization is a breakdown. 

If he knew right away what happened to his brother, that would just burn all of us even more emotionally. That moment he has of “what if” is there to keep us from sobbing after we learn the truth. Because every playthrough after the truth is realized only hurts when you sit down and think about how Saeyoung didn't know his brother right away because of everything Saeran went through and how he lost himself in the name of revenge.

If he knew it was his brother without a shadow of a doubt at first glance, that makes it all the more painful for us to think about how he could never ever not know his brother in a crowd. If he could see his brother without a moment of hesitation, then he would be forced to look in the mirror and question everything he ever did wrong because his mirror reflection looking at him in contempt is only a reminder of how he sacrificed everything and it didn't even matter.

His sacrifice meant nothing. There is no moment to deny anything. There is no way to second-guess himself, that is his brother, and his brother suffered. At least when there is a bit of deniability, he can somehow work his way through the pain by trying to make himself believe that what happened wasn't because of him, but if he saw it from the very first second they met each other's eyes, then the pain would be unbelievable. 

The pain is already unbelievable, but there is something that is difficult to put into words when it comes to them seeing each other for the first time and there being no doubt about it. Saeyoung would blame himself 100% after seeing the pain in Saeran's eyes... the same red hair and golden eyes, just filled with contempt instead of relief and joy to be together again.

There is a kind of separation between them when they don't look exactly alike, but when they look the way they once did when they were children, it burns in a way that Saeyoung could never describe. It would be like the innocent memory of his brother shattered tenfold on impact because there was no attempt to erase his identity in the situation, his identity is front and center. 

Our Saeran bleaches his hair to disconnect himself from Saeyoung... but if that connection was still there... well, the thought is a heavy one. It's an interesting thought piece, not going to lie, but there is so much in it that makes me want to cry. That moment where he has a chance to deny what's happening delays the inevitable at the end of the day, but tainting the image of the red-haired baby Saeran in his mind is something that cuts like a knife. 

There's just... a brief disconnection when he has his white hair and I don't know how to describe it in words. I hope this is making sense but I've only made myself cry. 

[poorly-drawn-mdzs]

Lan Wangji Goes To Lotus Pier AU: Part 3: Enveloping Feelings.

(Part 1, Part 2, Part 4 (soon))

[arcadebroke]

el_stitch

[tangramkey]

i love my Basketbot Portal AU

[frogatz]

you'll see them again !

too many thoughts and things done with Intent to fully explain myself . partially bc this was supposed to be much much longer, but i think i would like to play more in the space of post-game loop.

[2dguy]

Ohno! puppy cat needed money to pay rent but stuck while trying to steel the precious diamond from the museum! is this mission truly impossible?

[crystal-cottage-bysb]

Pixel Bee & Puppycat lost in space 💫 Full image available as a wallpaper starting 9/1 for Pixel Hearts members on Ko-fi 💗

[orangepterodactyl]

more 8-bit bocchis cause i was bored

[sleepyghostmp3]

Happy Halloween Everyone! From Luigi's Mansion

Instagram || Twitter

[sophfandoms53]

Y’all remember when Sonic was going stir crazy on the boat in Sonic X and his friends for a few moments just watched as he ran back and forth like a mad man?

That’s probably what Shadow dealt with 95% of the time as he watched Sonic jump from universe to universe while he was just trapped in that paradox limbo unable to do anything bc this hyperactive hedgehog doesn’t know how to listen.

“There that blue idiot goes again, what the fuck”

[marshmallowprotection]

I want the backstory to that cloths swap imagine in the mint eye box So Bad. I feel like it also implies at some point saeran lets his natural color grow out. Its so cute.

"You know, I always thought you looked ridiculous in this outfit," he said, a dry yet amused sound escaped Saeran as he looked down at the outfit in question. "I never saw the purpose. It confused me to see you taking inspiration from a traffic light. I didn't put it together until I saw your bunker, you know? I get it now."

"You have to admit your brother has style?" Saeyoung countered, his eyebrows wiggling in a mocking fashion, and Saeran gave him a hard shove to the shoulder. "Okay, okay. I get it! You're not a fan of my red, yellow, and orange wavelength!"

"No," Saeran said.

"No?"

Saeran looked at his brother, "You always liked tinkering with stuff when we were young... you would tell me stories about technology all the time, but what you thought was the coolest thing was always a car. I remember once when you mentioned how badly you wanted to build one so that we could escape and travel anywhere we wanted. I guess you never lost your dream. Oh, also, you really don't hide your drawings well. Why did you have yourself drawn as a race car driver all over your fridge?"

Saeyoung smiled, sheepishly. It wasn't that bad. He liked to express himself in a way that felt comfortable. For Saeyoung, cosplay and all the stories he could doodle on paper helped him cope with what he had to deal with. He knew that it wasn't that different for Saeran who spent a lot of his time dabbling in a journal these days.

It was still... weird between himself and his brother. They didn't know each other anymore and it was hard to figure out how to change that. It was Saeran's partner who jokingly said that they could try to get in each other's shoes to see what they didn't understand. It was silly to exchange clothes but... they were twins, after all. They could share a lot and see what stuck.

"I admire Lightning McQueen?" he offered.

"The crocs you wear at home gave that away," Saeran said. It was hard to tell if he was annoyed or amused by that.

To be fair, when they were kids, it was hard to know what Saeran was thinking. He was always far away from the world even if they were together. His daydreams kept him safe and sound so Saeyoung never pressed him to be open about what he had to do to survive. He had his own means, too. He would study programming for hours until he knew what he was looking at.

Instead, Saeyoung looked at the outfit that Saeran often wore. He liked the feeling of the button-up, or so he claimed. It wasn't tight on his body and it didn't make him feel hyperaware of his insecurities or healing wounds. Saeran had gone through so much that Saeyoung blamed himself for, but a lot of that was out of his control. He did the best he could and Saeran found comfort in the structure of a suit for some reason.

It made him look like a grown-up, though.

All Saeyoung ever wanted for his brother was for him to make it to adulthood and enjoy the experience of life. He just never thought he would be able to see it firsthand. But, just like the suit, Saeran had a world of structure and freedom at the same time. His brother had a partner, security, safety, and a garden he could use to look at the sky all day. It was wonderful.

He was so proud of his twin.

"You know, you look like you're another one of Jumin's worker bees in this outfit," Saeyoung chuckled.

Saeran hummed, clearly lost in thought, "Well, if things hadn't gone the way they did, I wouldn't have minded that. Jumin is considerate and did right by me while I did my work for him. Everyone looked at me and treated me like I was always capable of being confident and a leader to people around me. When I wear that outfit... I feel capable. I don't doubt myself. I feel free and I like that feeling so I haven't done to change my style since I became liberated."

"Hey, I'm proud of you," Saeyoung said. He pressed a hand against his brother's shoulder. "But, you were always capable and brave. I just never let you have a chance to shine when we were kids. I thought I had to be strong for you so you would never have to fight a battle you weren't ready for... but my mistake was thinking you weren't ready to protect yourself."

Saeran smiled. "Strength comes from believing in yourself, yes, but it comes just as much from having people who believe in you. The RFA taught me that, [Y/N] taught me that, and you taught me that. We're the strongest we can be when our loved ones believe in us and stand by our sides. You tried to fight alone but... you were strong because of your friends... and because they believed in you, they believed in me, too."

"So, you think your traffic light brother is strong in a real way?"

"I always have, hyung."

Their family was a little splintered and broken, but it wasn't going to be that way forever. They were healing and they would find a way to bond just like when they were kids someday. For now, it was okay to play around and poke fun at each other until they knew what it was like to be adults and to have a brother again.

A familiar voice came from the back porch, "Hey, Saeran, Saeyoung! C'mon, I need to get a picture for the chatroom! They won't believe I talked Saeran into this! Saeyoung, sure, but that's only because he's a master cosplayer. I promise it'll just take a minute!"

"[Y/N] won't take no for answer," Saeyoung chuckled. He glanced at them in the distance and then back to Saeran. "Well, we shouldn't let them wait forever, huh? I have a feeling they're pouting and we both know that you can't say no to them when they do that."

Saeran rolled his eyes and began walking back in the direction of the little cozy house that they had come to call their own. "Well, look at you, you've learned my true weakness. I guess we're starting to see eye to eye after all."

"Have you figured mine out, then?"

"It's Jumin Han's cat."

"Damn."

[iguessitsjustme]

Ter stop talking over and making decisions for Dee challenge 2k24. Y'all ain't even friends at this point you're just the annoying coworker go away

[posthumanwanderings]

undefined

[ Sega Saturn Vaporwave Vol.1 (Segment) ] Virtual On: Cyber Troopers - Everything Merges With the Night (SOUND! SHOCK Arrange Ver.) Mega Man 8 - Opening

[unrealityliminal]

[2dguy]

sticky supports transrights

[skrunksthatwunk]

you go to a lesbian blog and find it says women only!! no men allowed!!! and go oh! excuse me, um, what about other lesbians? plenty of lesbians are genderqueer... and they go well, okay, go fuck yourself tim chop off your sweaty dick and stop calling yourself a lesbian. you do not have a dick, actually. you think about that fact often, even though it does you no good. you do not tell this person that.

you go to another lesbian blog and it says women only and you try again, and this time they change it to wlw + nblw only (non-men who love non-men :D). and you'll say hey i appreciate that but gender's not really that cut and dry for a lot of people. someone could be both a man and nonbinary, for instance. i just worry that you're looking at nonbinary as a generic third gender, or an extension of womanhood. i mean yeah you include nblw in your tags but all your posts are about pussy-havers exclusively. what's with that? and they say go fuck yourself you pervy man pretending to be a lesbian. you tried to sneak in but i won't let you.

so you go to a lesbian blog with a dozen or so posts about queer people needing to be more weird about it and you sigh in relief. but you still see the men dni. that's odd. hoping for the best, you say hey! i know you mean well but please maybe don't put men dni at the end of the lovely posts on your lesbian blog bc some lesbians are men. and they'll be like ok!! well you're allowed ;) and you say no that's not. no. some men are lesbians not just me. you think about your own dicklessness and wonder if that's why you were given entry. and you add that even if male lesbians are allowed, there's no indication of that. how would anyone know without asking? and they're like ohh gotcha gotcha well men dni + this is for sapphics only!! and you'll be like ok well that treats the concepts of men and sapphics as mutually exclusive identities and i just told you that's not true and you agreed with me so.. i don't think that solves our problem. and they're like. ok. fine. men dni but genderfluid and multigender people are allowed! and you're like no see that's. that's still the same thing.. you're saying the same thing just with different words. if you don't want men to interact but you're fine with multigender/genderfluid/etc ppl interacting then you either don't see them as Real Men (because they don't reach a standard of Full Manhood) or Complete Men (because they're only Part-Time Men), both of which suggest that they are, in some way, not men or less-than men, which is invalidating and defeats the point of the exception in the first place (accommodation) OR that you don't really mean the dni which is confusing and inconsistent and makes guydykes feel weird and uncomfortable and excluded from the lesbian space you're trying to cultivate. and they're like um. ok. so. cishet men dni? and you're like well i think that makes more sense, but what if someone identifies as both a cishet man and a sapphic? again, if we're trying to accommodate the genderfucky populace then that has to be a possibility that is considered. and they say god you people are never happy. what do you want me to do? what am i supposed to say to keep the right men out? and you pause. you empathize with the need for a space free from dudes trying to fuck you straight and feminine. dudes who watch lesbian porn and joke about what they'd do if they were allowed into girls locker rooms. who look at you like a piece of meat, and like someone who looks at women like pieces of meat in the same way he does. you get it. you know. you want a space where you can be sapphic, too. that's why you came to these blogs in the first place. you brace yourself and you say well i don't know that there are "right men" to keep out. i don't know that there's any single label that would accomplish whatever it is you're trying to accomplish. you could go for "sapphics only" or "queers only" and i think that might be the closest thing to what you want, but it's never going to be perfect. creating any exclusive space is going to shut out people you didn't account for, and the broader the label, the more people will be shut out that you didn't want to shut out. and what about people who don't know if they're allowed? what of questioning transbians, where are they supposed to go? and, frankly, i think i might rather my dykey posts get read and appreciated by a gay guy who sees me as a man than a woman who only sees me as a sacred womb, pure from male perversions or violence or whatever. i think community might just be more complex than a dni can handle. and they look at you and say i don't want to not have a dni. i think you're too permissive. you can't just "what about" or microlabel your way into everything. go fuck yourself, i bet you're not even a lesbian anyway. go find a real problem to get mad about.

you go to a lesbian blog. you ignore the men dni because you know you probably don't even count to them. or maybe you do count and, out of respect for your manhood, they'd shun you accordingly. you try to feel okay about that. you scroll past dozens of posts about mediocre men and gagging at straight friends' boyfriends and how gross and undeserving men are of the beautiful women they couple up with and how all women should be gay so they can get treated right and and and and and. you finally find a post about curling into someone you love and feeling at peace and try to lose yourself in it. you know that feeling is what unites you, what makes you belong. you try to focus on it. you think about carding your hands through a butch's hair or lacing fingers with a femme and feeling warm and loved and more yourself than you ever have before. like this is who you're meant to be. you read about lesboys and butch boytoys and genderfucky dykes and big hairy deep-voiced wonderful women (like you want to be someday, like you wish you could make yourself) and you try to ignore the men dni underneath each and every post. and you daydream about meeting someone kind and earnest at a lesbian bar even though you don't think any such bars exist within three states of you and you can't drink and don't want to drink because you need to be in control of yourself at all times so you don't fuck up like you're always about to and here in the nonexistent lesbian bar you feel wanted and safe and in good company. you picture your ideal, happiest self. it is a mistake. ideal-you has a goatee. not the mascara one you smear on and call drag even though you know it's not drag, not really, the beard you call drag because you think everyone would look at you sadly if you told them it was just to pretend you had something out of your reach. a beard that's soft and that you grew and that cannot be smudged away if you get too comfortable with it. the dream shatters. your people pull away from you, their scoffs mixing with the mind-numbing gay girl bedroom pop you learned to settle for just to have something that almost resembled you, they all pull away and turn their backs and do not look at you. you're too close to being a man now, even though you're the same amount of man as before. and they know you're not supposed to interact with men, not as you would with dykes, at least. and it sours. it's all your imagination, all in your head, but it sours.

you sigh. you think about how small you are. how short, how narrow, how feeble. how your voice pitches up when you talk to strangers because it's easier to speak quietly when it carries more, and because you're nervous. because it's a chore to talk, like everything is. you think about testosterone. you think about how your family would look at you, the questions they would ask, your answers they would only pretend to accept. the uncomfortable glances and whispered questions they'd try to hide from you. you think about how small you are, and how small you will always be. how you don't know of a way to fix it, but even if there was one, no one would want you anymore. you'd be the only one thinking it made you a cooler dyke. you think about how you don't even want a T-voice all the time, how you'll never be able to switch it at will, because you don't know how and can't bring yourself to figure it out. you think about how your throat closes around every hint of your own attraction. how wanting is perverse, how wanting is invasive, how wanting is embarrassing and too vulnerable so it must stay anonymous, as an online witness, and how you can barely manage to form or maintain friendships because your brain makes you pull away, always spinning out and struggling to recover from the simplest of interactions. how they'll all leave you and you won't chase after them at all and how that will hurt them. how stuck you get. how it looks like nothing's holding you back, how that frustrates everyone who thought you were going to be more than you were. the people you love who understand except when it comes to being ghosted, being shut out. how you don't want to hurt them. how you can't tell them that because you're stuck. how you turn to stone when touched, how you never reach out, how you lose your speech and can't look at people, how your autism is fun and sexy until it becomes real and you never see them anymore, how much you longed for someone who knew everything without you having to explain, and who loved you anyway. how unreasonable you know that is to expect of anyone. you think about that not-even-real lesbian bar. you think about how you still can't drive. how you can't leave your home on your own, without dragging somebody into helping you. how you can't leave your body. how you can't leave your manhood behind.

you think about finding another lesbian blog and ignoring everything. about skimming it for the parts you can juice some meaning from. the parts men ignore and don't understand, and how typical of you it is to do so. or the parts where you're not welcome and you should accept that, because it's for lesbians only. how you are a lesbian anyway. how you're meant to choose lesbian or man, how each is a betrayal of some kind to yourself or your people, your family, your lovely strangers, your rare friendly acquaintances. about the parts that tell you you're not wanted, that you're ugly and lazy and gross and insert yourself everywhere without even asking. about the parts that tell you you are hated, and how lesbians are above it all by rejecting men. how lesbians are each blessed miracles. about the parts that say you should be ashamed of being whatever twisted confused freak you are, of everything, of looking and wanting or not looking or not wanting, of picking and choosing instead of taking it all in with a smile. after all, shouldn't you take it? or is your ego too fragile, as men's so often are? aren't you tired? good. we're not here for your consumption. and we sure as hell don't want your company or "community" or whatever. didn't you read the sign? no boys allowed. and if you want to come in you have to make up your mind. as if you haven't told them the only answer you have. you're both. you're both.

you know you broke the rule by interacting.

but it gets lonely sometimes. you wonder if they know.