Imagine the red haired pirates coerce you into singing for them
Shanks: *leading the crew in singing Bink's Sake*
Uta: *on a table trying to sing over everyone*
Yassop: *playful nudges you when he notices when you're just sitting there*
You: *shoots him an awkward smile as you shake your head*
The crew: *cheers as they finish the song*
Benn: whew boy, look at the time, it's nearly midnight, I think it's time to call it a night.
Lucky Roux: Careful there, your age is showing there, bud.
Yassop: we're not going yet, one more song.
Benn: but it's past my bedtime
Yassop: not yet, we always finish off the night with the crew singing a song together, and unfortunately someone wasn't singing along with us during the last one. *ruffles your hair*
You: I can't carry a tune.
Hongo: *grins* I bet you could do it if there was a gun to your head.
You: I'd have to tell you to pull the trigger piglet.
Shanks: Now you have to sing us a song to make up breaking one of our party traditions.
You: can't I owe you one? It's late, and I'm tired
Shanks: Haha. No
The crew: Sing, sing, sing sing.
Yassop: *picks you up and plops you on a table* you have the stage.
You: Ugh, y'all are really gonna make me do this, aren't you.
Uta: yes now sing!
You: *sings the only song that comes to mind*
The crew: *applaud and sing along*
When you're done
You: there happy
Shanks: I didn't know you have such a pretty voice.
You: You're just saying that to be nice.
Uta: He is being nice
Shanks: *gives her the disapproving dad warning side eye *
Uta: And honest! We should totally sing together sometime.
Benn: *gives her a subtle thumbs up*
Yassop: can we go home now?
Benn: fuck yes, I'm tired.
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Doubts
John blinked vigorously to clear his vision, forcing the two projections floating in front of him to merge back into one. A flick of his finger and the ship schematics spun in front of him, faster than he had intended it to. The movement threw him off balance, a rare occurrence in zero gravity, only possible because of his exhausted state. He drifted back into the wall, colliding with it roughly.
“John, it has been roughly 72 hours since you last slept. It would be wise to take a break. You are too tired to be any use at the moment.”
“I’m fine, EOS. I have to check everything. All of us are going to be on that ship, and I won’t risk a repeat of last time. I can’t risk my brother’s lives like that. I have to make sure it’s safe.” He continued stubbornly glaring at the schematics, even as his vision swam in front of him. His arms felt too heavy to move, and if he weren’t free-floating in space, he would have been collapsed on the floor.
The hologram flickered out, and he knew EOS had put her foot down. She would not allow him to work any more, even when he desperately wanted to. “You need to rest. You will be of no use to your brothers if you continue on like this. You look awful, and you are so tired you can barely function.” Her voice softened slightly. “Working yourself to exhaustion to avoid thinking about your problems is not healthy, John.”
He pulled himself slowly down the hallways towards his bed, conceding the fight. He was too tired to argue, and that in itself was clear proof that EOS was right. He never gave up on an argument if he could help it.
John knew exactly what the chances of finding their father still alive were. The likelihood that they were going on a rescue mission was slim to none. People didn’t survive on their own in deep space for as long as Jeff had been gone. All they were likely to find was a body. They had to go, he knew that. To finally have an answer after all these years would be worth everything. But if anything he could do would make it safer, he had to try. Dad wouldn’t have wanted them to recklessly risk their lives on the very unlikely chance that he was still alive.
John had not been good enough to save his father.
His brothers were all he had left.
And he refused to lose them too.
*******************************************
Alan clutched the photograph tightly in his hand. There weren’t many paper pictures left, most saved on computers and phones now, but this one was special. Each of his brothers had one as well, but his was the most well-worn. Everyone else didn’t need the picture as much, having enough clear memories of Dad that it wasn’t as necessary for them, but he did. He had been too young to remember much when Dad disappeared, and with the years, the few memories he had faded. He knew that Scott looked like Dad, everyone said so, but what they never mentioned was the little scar on the corner of Dad’s chin, just barely visible in the photo.
They didn’t mention how his eyes looked so much like Gordon’s, or how his smile reminded them of John. They never mentioned the smile lines around his mouth just like Virgil’s. In fact, as Alan stared at the picture, he could see each of his brothers there. Everyone except himself. Each of his brothers remembered when Dad was around, too. They had dozens of stories, which Alan had heard many times over the years. They knew where they fit in the family with Dad there. They remembered a life with him.
But Alan hadn’t. He didn’t remember his Dad more than bits and pieces, and he was pretty sure most of those memories were from his brothers’ stories. He couldn’t remember a time before. He knew he was a capable astronaut, pilot of Thunderbird 3, valued member of International Rescue, but with his Dad home, where did he belong? His piloting skills couldn’t measure up to someone like the great Jeff Tracy. He was still young. What if Dad pulled him off rescues? Alan had proved himself to Scott, but his dad wouldn’t know that. All he would remember was the child he had left behind.
He curled up on his bed, still grasping the photograph tightly. His father’s face stared back at him, his smile now feeling mocking instead of the comfort it usually was. What would Dad say when they found him? Would he even remember him? Would he be proud of him, or disappointed in what he had become?
He wanted Dad home, there was no question about that.
He just hoped that he wouldn’t be a disappointment next to the child Dad remembered.
*******************************************
Gordon flipped the light on, banishing the shadows to the corners of the room. He wasn’t sleeping anyways, so might as well do something. A book was picked up and just as quickly tossed aside, unable to hold his attention. He tried jumping jacks, continuing until his breathing came heavy, but he was no more ready for sleep now than he was before. He briefly considered pranking one of his brothers, but quickly discarded that idea. They needed their sleep, and he wasn’t thoughtless enough to deprive them of it. He ended up settled cross-legged on the floor, staring at his fish tank, watching the animals drift slowly through the water.
The motion, though calming, wasn’t enough to occupy his entire mind, and the shadows began to creep back in. Ever since he had found the beacon, he had been fighting them off, but they continued to return, only growing stronger in the dark of night. No matter what he told them, they refused to leave, doubts long-hidden that had not been forgotten with time, only buried.
What if Dad was didn’t want him? He was the odd one out, the only aquanaut in a family of pilots. While the rest of his family had spent their entire lives attempting to leave the ground behind, with varying degrees of success, he had embraced the restraint of earth. Water was his element, not air. He hated flying. He hated space.
Dad had never said anything to dissuade him from his passion, but he had never encouraged him either. Maybe he had been hoping time would cure Gordon of the foolish notion of remaining earth-bound. It probably should have. The rest of the family was so connected, so similar in their desires, their wants, their loves. But no matter how much they tried to convince him otherwise, Gordon knew the truth. His father’s shadow stretched over everything he did. He had made a place, a name for himself while Dad was gone, but with him back?
He didn’t belong.
*******************************************
Virgil settled his headphones more securely over his ears, adjusting his position on the bench. It wasn’t often that he played his electric piano, much preferring the grand in the family room. The sound was better, and there was always a brother or two around to share it with, but tonight felt like a night to be alone. They were each processing in their own ways, him as much as anyone. He and his father had never gotten along as well as some of his brothers, Virgil reminding Jeff too much of what he had lost.
But they had shared some loves. Jeff had loved music, not as much as Lucy and Virgil, but he had some favorite songs. Lucy had recorded him one night, hiding the camera in the corner to catch his singing, something he never would have done if he had known he was being watched. It was an odd choice for an astronaut’s favorite song, but Jeff had always been a realist. He knew the dangers to be found in space, but he felt compelled to go anyways. It was worth the risk to him.
Of course, the risk hadn’t just taken a toll on him, but on his children as well. Especially now that they knew there was a chance he could still be out there, the song held a whole new meaning. Virgil pressed the start button on the recording, settling his hands on the keys as he played accompaniment to his father’s voice.
Can you hear, can you hear, can you hear my voice?
Coming through, coming through, coming through the noise
The recording continued, Virgil fighting back tears to be able to see the keys. He could imagine his dad singing the same song out in the vastness of space, hoping desperately that someone would hear him. That someone would save him.
It's so dark, it's so dark out here in space
And it's been so long, been so long since I've seen a face
My eyes are shut but I can see
The void between you and me, mm
And I feel, and I feel like I'm going insane
Virgil could only imagine what it would do to someone to live for so long on their own. When they first found out there was a chance Dad was still alive, he had done a deep dive into all the medical research he could find with any bearing on their situation. He knew the effects of low or no gravity on a human’s body, and how to help. He knew what to do if Dad hadn’t been eating enough, how to rebuild a body after prolonged nutrient deficiency. But there wasn’t enough research on what solitary confinement did to a person’s mind. He knew it was bad, that it had been banned as a punishment for years for a reason, but no one knew how to fix the damage it caused.
He didn’t know how to fix it, and he didn’t know how to deal with that. He was supposed to be the one who fixed everything, and he couldn’t let everyone down. His brothers were believed in him. His dad was counting on him.
He didn’t know if he believed in himself.
*******************************************
Scott pushed himself harder, forcing his limbs to cooperate and propel him even faster down the path. His brothers would have tried to stop him from running at night, but they had all gone to bed hours ago, and he had needed the release. His thoughts were too loud to allow him to sleep, and so he forced himself to go even faster, hoping to leave them behind.
What if Dad didn’t approve of what he had done with International Rescue?
His brothers risked their lives almost daily. What would Dad say when he found out about that?
Tracy Industries now was quite different than it was when Dad left. Scott had done his best, but some of the decisions he had made weren’t very popular. What if his dad didn’t agree with them either?
He ran harder.
What if he had made a mistake in allowing Alan to join on rescues? True, they had needed another astronaut after Jeff’s disappearance, but he was still so young.
What about the scars that each of his brothers bore, both on their skin and on their hearts? He should have been the one to bear those. They never should have had to. What would Dad say when he saw them?
It didn’t seem to matter how fast he went. He couldn’t outrun the voices. They grabbed onto him, closing his throat and tightening in his chest, cutting off his breathing. They took the face of his father, fuzzy and distorted by time, all glaring at him, shouting the same thing. “I’m disappointed in you, Scott. You failed me.”
Scott collapsed to his knees, clasping his hands over his ears to drown out their shouts. All the fears he had fought for years were coming back to haunt him. All the decisions he had made questioned. All the thoughts that kept him awake at night crowded forward at once, demanding to be addressed.
No. Scott pushed himself to his feet, refusing to buckle under the pressure. It didn’t matter what Dad said when they got him back. They were going to get him anyway. It didn’t matter if it was hard or dangerous. They were International Rescue, and that’s what they did. It didn’t matter if the person they were searching for didn’t approve of them. They saved people. And they were going to save their dad.
If he hated Scott when they found him, then so be it. Scott knew he had done what was right, and he could live with a clear conscience, and the knowledge that his brothers were alive because of him. He had done his best, but if his father couldn’t see that, he didn’t know what he would do.
If his father hated him, he didn’t know if he could live with it.
*******************************************
The next night, wrapped in the warm arms of their father, doubts were laid to rest, and they all knew they would be okay.
Dad didn’t hate him.
He wasn’t a failure.
He was worth believing in.
He belonged in this family.
He wasn’t a disappointment.
He was good enough.
*******************************************
He was finally home.
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