#A whole bunch of little fuckin dudes

[carnival-core]

There is no joy in the world the only constant is suffering (Like 2 minutes later) OMG primates

[i-literally-cant-with-this]

A/N ::: Just some HC's about what aftercare might be like with some of the boys (don't @ me, they're FICTIONAL, first of all. And go read my pinned post -> everyone is at least 18, but I imagine them 25 or older. Just a friendly reminder! Thanks!)

I have some more ideas lined up for a 2nd part//or whatever but I'm not gonna do them if this doesn't fall into the laps of people who really enjoy it. Y'all know what I'm talking about.

C/W ::: Hanma/Chifuyu/Baji/Kisaki/Kazutora/Draken x F.reader, talk of sex, and things that go along with it. Hair pulling, dirty talk (not in detail really) ... if anything wasn't listed and you just know it should be (like the world will end if I don't include it), let me know!

WC ::: 1,289 (I can't stop. And no, I'm not sorry.)

PART 2

Ⓗanma ::: He would kiss all the red, splotchy spots he made on your body. Rubbing your bum to soothe the burn of where his hand came down so hard, so many times. You'd be laying there totally enjoying the sweetness that he's giving you until you feel his cock press into your hip. You look at him with that quirked brow, narrowed eyes, and smirk on your lips, just daring him to push you for "one more". Hanma has his hands out in front of him, almost like he's defending himself against the look on your face. "I - promise. I promise to be more gentle this time." He leans down to kiss your tits and take a bright and swollen nipple into his mouth, sucking gently and trying to convince you that he will, in fact, go easier on you this time. "YOLO, hana. C'mon." He runs his fingers over your still soaked cunt. "You're a real bastard, y'know that, Shu? Fine. But this time, I'm beating your ass."

((*Hana -> Blossom in Japanese))

Ⓒhifuyu ::: He's going to have whatever you could need or want already at his place. Obviously, you have what you need at your place. But sometimes you're not home. So it's nice to have him prepared. He'd have stuff for you to take a nice bath after he wrecked you. There would be a pretty, mirrored tray in his bathroom with a variety of essential oils and little vials of bath salts for his baby to use at her leisure. Chifuyu would low-key do some research on which oils did what. Peppermint was uplifting and good for headaches. Lavender was good to calm your mind and ease muscle aches. He would be the kind of guy to pull your hair while he's fucking you from behind telling you "Turn ... turn your head so I can see how fuckin' beautiful you look while you're takin' this cock. Fuckin' love you so ... fuckin' ... much, angel. Make me feel so good. 'M I makin' you feel good, too? Yeah? Fuck yeah, want you to cum all over me with that gorgeous pussy of yours."

Ⓑaji ::: He is the wildcard and the surprising one when it comes to aftercare. Sometimes 97.9% of the time, his aftercare evolves into more sex. Whether it's oral (he likes to lick up the cummy mess from your puffy little pussy - and moan a little about it - which fuckin' only turns you on more so it's partially your fault that you guys fuck again when he was planning on taking care of you ... just in a different way). He loves you, though. He loves the pink glow of your cheeks (face and ass - and it doesn't matter if you're fair-skinned or a darker tone - dude WILL make sure he changes the natural hue of your flesh). Baji enjoys seeing his large handprint on your ass and thighs. Also will kiss at all the bite marks he's left on your body - your whole body. There is no discrimination when he sinks his teeth into you. Man will just kind of let his heart guide him and he'll bite wherever his mouth lands. He does a bunch of little things for you: He'll bring you your favorite drink (which he learned right away), he will order takeout if you're hungry (he knows what to get), he lays with you and holds you close to him if it was a particularly rough and raunchy romp. Secretly enjoys the closeness almost more than you do.

Ⓚisaki ::: Is a dumbass ... at first. The first time you guys fucked he hopped up and took a shower. Liiiiike, no, dude. Wrong. Answer. Asshat. He's pissed that Hanma told him that he was an absolute idiot for doing that. Like, how did that shit ass know more than him!? However, once Kisaki is made aware of what is expected (but NOT expected, however, much appreciated), he is almost a changed man. After a slow and close afternoon rendezvous at his place, you're both laying there, basking in the afterglow. He stays in bed with you for a while and kisses your cheek, rubs your hip with the palm of his freakishly warm hand, giving you a squeeze occasionally. "You uh, *aheh*, can I get you anything, ningyō? Water, tea? Are you hungry? Anything you want." He smiles at you nervously, trying to recall what Hanma instructed him to say. "No, Kisa', I think right now I just want you to be here with me. Is that ok? Will you stay?" He nods his head, "Of course. But I still want to shower." You roll your eyes but appreciate the time he's sharing with you anyway.

((*Ningyō -> Doll in Japanese))

Ⓚazutora ::: Seems to think that aftercare = afterplay 🔁 foreplay. It's not such farfetched logic. But you love how fucking sweet on you he is. He kisses all over your body; your neck is his favorite place to kiss you when you're in the kitchen working together toward the level of aftercare you both deserve. He'll stand behind you and run his hands all over the expanse of your hips, back, waist, chest. Then he'll start salivating a little heavier at the thought of sucking on your nipples. How hard and squishy (HOW THOUGH) they are between his lips. Kazutora will dip down under your arm and stand between you and the counter as you're cutting up something and start kissing you - quite heavily. And you don't mind, but you're still kind of wiped out from the hour and a half you two just spent in bed. But his big, curious eyes just have this effect on you and you stretch out your neck when he starts to nuzzle his nose in there and whisper how much he wants to go down on you again make sure that pretty little pussy isn't still sore. He wants to give you a "massage" to ease any discomfort. "You won't have to lift a finger - un-unless you want to, momo. Please?" He will just pick you up and carry your ass back to the room and take his sweet, sweet time with you. AGAIN.

((*Momo -> Peach in Japanese))

Ⓓraken ::: D-R-A-K-E-N *sighs dreamily*. This big fool. The things you do to/for each other are out of this world. Your bodies were made for one another. Period. Not only does he have you down to a science while he's fucking you, his aftercare is top notch. Draken is the kind of guy who will pull your hair so your ears are closer to him and he'll whisper the filthiest and most nasty shit to you. He's also the kind of guy who will hold your hand to the shower (once you're able to walk again) and wash your hair to ease any residual burning on your scalp. He'll gently brush it out while you sit at your vanity in the bathroom and bend over to whisper incredibly sweet things to you. He's not trying to cancel all the things he did to you (for you??) but he likes there to be a balance. He doesn't want things to get too off kilter. So expect an equal or greater reaction from him in the aftercare routine. Draken will also pay attention to small cues from you and if you ever seem bothered by anything - he doesn't care how small or stupid you might think it is - he always gets you to tell him. So don't waste time. Just fucking tell him so he can go back to being the best boyfriend to you.

Taglist ::: @kazutora-kurokawa @katkitkats @arlerts-angel @viburnt @darkstarlight82

[shoukiko]

How the TF2 Mercs would react to you wanting to paint their nails <3

a/n: I hope you guys will appreciate this, TF2 holds a special place in my heart, I've loved it for years so doing this makes me all giddy inside. If you have ay requests, please message me! I do CoD and TF2!! Enjoy! <3

Scout

Would be like "I ain't into that type of things, Toots."

After some convincing would let you paint his thumb and only his thumb.

Perhaps he sees you all happy while doing it and says it's okay for just *one more* finger.

Square nails, I don't make the rules.

Which then turns into his whole hand.

Shows it off to the team because YOU were the one who did it and they should be jealous.

"TAKE A FUCKIN GANDER YA BUNCH OF PANSIES"

Would pick off the nail polish as a habit during briefings or when he's not paying attention.

Feels bad coming back to you with his awful manicure.

"Don't be such a stick in the mud, at least you get to hold my hand." Dick

Medic

Would love to have you paint his nails, but he thinks it would cause issues during his procedures

Ya know, cuz he doesn't wear gloves....for whatever reason

"Please.... :(" "Oh... Meine Taube.. How can I ever say no to you?"

100% Short round nails. Maybe not slender/skinny fingers, but they're def on the thinner side.

Ends up forcing himself to wear gloves just so they won't get ruined.

He thinks your careful and skilled hands are very attractive and "intriguing" as you paint them.

He's weird like that, You love it.

He loves you....maybe too much....He'd probably cut your hands off if you said yes.

He's the type to ask lol

Spy

No

No again

Stop asking

He wears gloves anyways, why do you want to so bad?

He doesn't have time for these silly games!!!!

"Mon canard, Please. This is too immature for me" "So you're saying you don't love me?" *Smug look*

You win

He has very nice nails by the way. Perfect nails, perfect slender hands.

He doesn't really say much, but you can tell from his eyes he enjoys such an intimate moment.

He tells noone and shows noone, but he likes to be in his room jsut looking at them, thinking of you.

Would do yours if you asked....nicely

Pyro

I mean this is obviously a yes.

The gloves are off before you finish your sentence.

Scarred hands, maybe missing a nail on a finger, but that's okay.

Picks the colors, they want pink. Lotta pink.

Get's excited when you bring up stickers.

Rocks a pink and purple manicure with a flower sticker on their missing nail.

Becomes a weekly thing, your little spa day. :)

Heavy

Skeptical, but why not? Couldn't hurt.

Lot of surface area, dudes hands are bigger than your face.

He finds it amusing that your hands are so small compared to his.

He's letting you paint his nails, but he'd like some dark colors.

Maybe not black, more like blue or maybe red occasionally/

"One sticker?" "No sticker, thank you" "Okay one sticker" "...Okay, for you"

Sniper

"If it'll make ya happy, doll."

Falls asleep as you paint them.

Rough hands, tan lines from his gloves, he has dirty finger nails :Gross:

You throw in some....cleaning... just cuz you care.

I love this man so much, but oh my god I just know he's musty.

You give him plain black nails, one white nail on his ring fingers

You don't do his thumb, you notice the big bruise under his nail, idk what those are called.

I looked it up it's called Garand Thumb (It's so canon)

You fight with him because you wanna know of it's like a hematoma or not (Gross I know, but I'd do it)

Engineer

Well it's not something he'd find himself doing on his own, would probably think it's silly until he met you.

"As long as I don't look all frou frou after, I'm fine with anything Darlin' "

AAAA TALK TO ME LIKE THAT

Thick fingies, like fat hands a bit, slightly rough because of how much he works. Only slightly because he still wears gloves.

I like to think his hands are covered in oil/dirt most of the time, He does wash them, but he's just always workin on something.

Would wash them before you paint them though. Lovely little you can't be getting your perfect hands dirty.

He wants yellow, give him yellow nails. Like sunshine yellow, like his hat.

He thinks it's "Just lovely lookin' "

Demoman

You don't ask, you just paint them while he's passed out drunk.

You give him rainbow nails, Glitter top coat. You're so mean

Surprisingly soft hands, Big and thick, very soft. My goodness you're even jealous by how nice they are.

He even has the perfect nails for painting. What doesnt this man have?

Oh wait

He's PISSED when he wakes up.

Probably calls it gay (But like....worse)

Sees you sad because of how he reacted.

Slumps in his chair, "They're 'right...."

Grows to like them (more like live with them)

Maybe in like 2 weeks to see hims again, they're still painted, just a bit withered away.

He loves em

Soldier

"DO I LOOK LIKE SOME SORT OF PANSY TO YOU, MAGGOT???"

You offer to do them in the colors of the American flag

He accepts obviously

You do it standing up cause he is just...there. Stiff as a board.

Wide nails, Rough knuckles, calluses.

When you're done he salutes you.

"Well done, Maggot. Now I won't have to kill you." Sure buddy

I hope you guys liked it!!

[zeephyre]

CR3 EPISODE 77 SPOILERS HOLY FUCK

ASHTON GREYMOORE YOU DUMB FUCKING MANIAC IM GONNA KILL YOU DEAD

im literally in awe. i just ??? taliesin you are literally insane, don't ever do that shit again, but also PLEASE do that again, that was so fucking cool and terrifying and i loved and hated every second of it.

i love ashton greymoore. they're so stupid. so... monumentally blind sided by their own incapability to understand that their body, as broken as it's been, isn't smth that he should just toss to the side so they can be more useful. so they can "save everyone"

the second ashton was back with the group and started his super hero spiel i knew... i knew it was going to lead to martyrdom. i think this whole fuckin group is just a bunch of martyrs waiting for a chance to blow themselves up or toss themself onto the blade in the name of protecting "everyone else".

it was obvious that ashton taking in the shard had like a 99.999999% chance of going tits up and imploding on everyone involved, but jesus fucking christ, of COURSE ashton preserved. this was all thanks to fearne, fcg and taliesin's complete luck when rolling constitution holy FUCK

im not gonna say anything abt taliesin or ashton being selfish tho i see a lot of critters in the stream itself and on twitter doing that, bc taliesin never made it a "ashton wants the shard and doesn't want fearne to have it" situation. FEARNE DOESN'T WANT IT. AND ASHTON WOULD NEVER RISK HER. THEY WOULD RISK THEMSELF THOUGH.

it would have been cool to see fearne making the choice to take the shard, because they reeeeeeally hesitated for so long so honestly i don't think i can pretend this is just ashton.

all in all, this was so stupid and so dangerous and it should not have worked, and i... i cannot wait to see what ashton becomes.

(and i can't wait for them to get an ass whooping from the entirety of bells hells like cmon dude save the suicidal bullshit till we GET to the moon PLEASE)

callowmoore is real, but i honestly... While im very giggly about that i also know that THIS event is gonna have intruiging repercussions for fearne's perception of ashton and their relationship.

they literally kissed??? let's talk about that when i have processed the fact that ashton exploded into millions of little pieces and got put back together by luck. oh the irony.

jfc is it Thursday yet????

[didididraws]

my tablet is currently halfway across the country for repairs (my brother's the most tech-savvy in my family and asking him to take a look at it was cheaper than taking it to a shop) so i haven't been able to draw lately. i've made a bunch of traditional sketches in the meantime, but none of them are presentable enough to post here, so i decided to take a trip down memory lane and fill out one of foxorian's influence maps!

below the cut are the names of the artists featured here, as well as a little bit of director's commentary on how they've influenced me :]

yugo limbo (website, tumblr, twitter) - some time last year, i realized something profoundly unnerving: i actually... don't like the art in smile for me's original release all that much? that's not to say it's bad, just that there isn't a whole lot about it outside of maybe its architecture that stands out to me. which is REALLY WEIRD, considering i wrote a whole retrospective about how much this game means to me. art-wise, however, it was only after smile for me's release that yugo limbo's art evolved in a way that really resonated with me; i love how textured everything is, i love the way they simplify clothing folds and the way that skin wrinkles around the joints, i love their love for puppets; all of those things ended up worming their way into my art style and tastes one way or another, and i couldn't be happier!! it didn't feel right to leave smile for me out of the equation entirely, though, so i chose a piece that was both related to that game and that i felt reflected a lot of what i love about yugo's more recent art.

echobsilly (twitter, tumblr) - oh god, speaking of yugo limbo - god. i fucking love echo's art so much i have no idea how to even do it justice in writing. like many people i first found him through his smile for me/limbolane fanart and animations - and those are some of his best work, don't get me wrong, but i really wanted to include one of his original designs to make a point that he's just fuckin great at art in general. character design, facial expressions, body language, composition, LIGHTING... he makes it all just. so so so gorgeous. i always liked "painterly" art styles for lack of a better word, but i think his art is what first pushed me to embrace that more in my digital art. i also like how he talks about dr. habit like he's his dead wife. i'm very proud to call him a friend these days :]

japhers (tumblr, twitter, instagram) - i first found japhers' art in high school and he very quickly became a HUUUUUGE influence on my taste in character and costume design. one of the big reasons i never fully bought into the idea that men's fashion is inherently harder to design is bc so much of his art is already dedicated to exploring fashion Without the restrictions of a gender binary in place which is to say that he's really good at drawing buff dudes in frilly outfits. i also think he gave me more confidence to draw more intricate costumes without having to worry about super dainty and clean lineart, bc a lot of his art looks like it's kinda been carved/rendered out of sketches, and it is Gorgeous.

moe suppe (website, tumblr, cohost) - another artist i found in high school, albeit originally from a long-gone instagram account. his art is what kickstarted my desire to have some Roughness in my art, some Texture. it may not have stuck to my lineart, but it Definitely stuck to my rendering. it helped that i was going through a pretty big angel/demon phase at the time, which meant i was pretty immediately drawn in by his delightfully weird worldbuilding. i should probably read fear not now that it's an actual serial...

val wise (website, itch.io, twitter, instagram) - a more recent influence, but a pretty significant one nonetheless. i featured the cover of délicatesse here because it was the first thing from him that i had ever read, but in general his grasp on the human body really blows me away given how deceptively simple his style looks at first glance, especially his faces. the way fat and hair sits on her bodies, and how much it varies from character to character... it's beautiful without being So glamorous that it feels untouchable. his costume design is also great. i recommend his comics for low fantasy/ursula k. le guin fans who are Dying to see more fat characters in leading roles. i also just found out that i am of two hearts is free on itch.io, so i'll be treating myself to that over spring break.

partycoffin (tumblr, twitter) - if you have known me for any amount of time at all then this should not come as a surprise to you. i actually wasn't going to include partycoffin in this map at first, because while welcome home has inspired me in Many creative pursuits, i didn't think visual art was one of them? i definitely picked up some of clown's love for dramatic lighting and thinner lines with just a smidge of well-placed hatching subconsciously, though.

ryoko kui - probably the most recent artist featured here? anyways i have a confession to make: i have yet to read dungeon meshi. i just know that when i saw a post compiling a bunch of ryoko kui's sketches from her daydream hour series, i was so overwhelmed with this feeling of, like… "oh, yeah, these capture almost everything i love about women as flesh and blood people. when i draw women this is the kind of beauty that i want people to see in them." of course, ryoko kui is a great character designer in general, but something about her women specifically really speak to me. the earthier color palettes and rendering also do a lot to endear her art to me.

shuzo oshimi - specifically his art in blood on the tracks. something that really stood out to me in that series was whenever the shadows would get really intense, and you'd get these big blocks of black with just the faintest bit of hatching to soften out some of their edges. it was always very effective in creating this sense of claustrophobia. i really want to keep incorporating that in my more intense pieces!

person918x (tumblr, instagram) - i don't work with 3d art often and i don't see myself doing so any time soon, but the composition of person918x's pieces is something i take a lot of inspiration of. i also love his sequential art, as someone who does a lot of dream journaling it's sick to see the exact Vibe of a dream be put to (digital) canvas. i also firmly believe that he's one of the only people out there who knows what he's doing when it comes to using generative AI in art.

oops i made this list too long so now i have to put the last two artists in a new block.

10. meatgiri (twitter, instagram) - definitely the artist i've known about the longest out of this selection. i think i've been following her since…. oh god. since i was in middle school. way before she was meatgiri, even. i think her influence probably shows up the least in my art, but there are definitely some characteristics that stuck with me for a very long time (the lil block of black accompanied by one or two lines for shading on the neck, the looser lineart making it really easy to incorporate soft curves and sharp edges, the Eyes, etc etc.) i chose this drawing of her oc juniper bc i thought it was both reflective of her current art And a good embodiment of a lot of things i wanted to emulate from her art as a young'un.

11. dragan bibin (website, instagram) - specifically his 'deimos' series. much like with person918x, it's his compositions that really stand out to me the most, and you probably know by now that i'm a sucker for high contrast. i find it interesting though that he uses high contrast to obscure more than he does to highlight... helps a lot with giving the deimos paintings that air of Quiet Unease. another thing i want to incorporate in my horror-adjacent art! manmade environments gone wrong!

[camryn-haitani]

Phobia Factor

Duncan x GNReader

Ep: Phobia Factor

TW: suicide talk and panic attack

All the campers are gathered around the fire sharing their fears. But you, you're a little smarter than that. but not as smart as Chris.

I know this isn't like a main fear some of y'all have, but this is a main fear for me. so I just wanted to put it out there beforehand. also just to clarify, y'all aren't dating in the beginning.

- - - - - -

"c-celine dion music store standees..." Duncan says while his head hung low. "uh exsqueeze me? I didn't quite catch that" Cody exclaimed while leaning more towards Duncan. "shut the fuck up you little asshole or I'll kick your puny ass into next week's challenge." Duncan said while holding Cody's shirt.

(in the confession booth)

"uhhh I'm a little scared right now. like I have a feeling Chris is gonna get some sick twisted idea for us. ya know, since we're saying what our fears were. but ain't no way I'm saying that shit Infront of people. and ain't no way I'm saying it here either." I say while crossing my arms.

(with Chris and Chef)

"heh heh heh, oh don't worry y/n. we've been watching you very carefully. you don't have to say what your fear is, I already know it." Chris said followed by a maniacal laugh. "ya know man, you're one sick freak. but me too." chef said while eating his dessert.

(back at the campfire)

"what about you y/n? what are you scared of?" Courtney egged on. "y'all a bunch of dumbasses ya know. y'all seriously didn't think that Chris is gonna do something with this info that he has on us now." I say. "omg you're rightttt." Lindsey said. you facepalmed and shook your head. "I'm headed to bed, good night y'all." I say while stretching and popping my back. "wait up sweetheart, I'll walk you there." Duncan says while walking behind you. "why's that bitch gotta take him away?" Courtney said quietly.

"you know, I have a feeling you're right about the whole Chris gonna do something with our fears thing." Duncan said while putting his arm around your shoulder. "I told y'all" I say, "well good night Duncan. I'll hopefully see you tomorrow." "good night babe." he says while kissing the back of your hand.

'why are feelings so hard. I think I'm falling for Duncan. we've just clicked from the beginning. shit. but I'm in this to win it.' I think to myself before falling asleep

(next morning)

"GOOOOOOOOOOOOD MORNING CAMPERS. RISE AND SHINE. MEET ME AT THE LODGE FOR BREAKFAST IN 5 MINUTES." Chris yelled over the loudspeakers. "can't we just get 30 more minutes of fuckin sleep?" leshawna said while rubbing her head.

after I got dressed, I walked out of the cabin and was met with Duncan having his back facing me. "hey sweet cheeks, you ready?" "yeah yeah I'm coming." I say still trying to wake up. we started walking to the lodge and I felt someone glaring daggers into my back. I turn around and nothings there. I brush off the feeling and keep walking.

"heyyyy campers. while you finish up breaky, how about heather meet me up at the amphitheater. it's sumooooooo time." "WHAT" Heather spats out along with her drink which hit Gwen. "real fuckin nice heather." Gwen said while her face dripping in water. "awww at least it's a good look on you." Heather says while walking out, shaking with fear.

"see I told you assholes Chris was gonna do something." I yell. "hey y/n. I need to talk to you. it's something important." Chef says while he pulls me out the door.

"ok guys. I found out what y/n's fear is. and I'm really not gonna like saying this but, I need y'all's help to make it work." Chris whisper yells.

(after Chris explained what they need to do)

"you're one sick ticket dude." leshawna says. "yeah man, this is just wrong." Duncan said with his head hung.

(at the amphitheater)

"ohhhhh ok I get it now. thanks chef." I say while walking to go sit next to Duncan. "no problem y/n." chef says going back to Chris. "hey Duncan." I sit down next to him. *silence* "uhh Duncan? you ok?" "why the fuck are you always following me around? get the fuck away from me. this is why Courtney's better than you." he snaps. "......oh. I'm sorry." I sadly say. I get up and go sit next to Gwen. "hey Gwen." "ughh the hell do you want? if you're not gonna be useful then stop wasting my time." Gwen yells. I have one more person I can go to. "hey trent." I say hoping he's not gonna be the the other two. "omg y/n stop thinking we're friends. we are not friends and we will never be friends. go jump off the fucking cliff we did in the first challenge. you'd be doing us a favor." trent says while regretting every word that came out of his mouth.

'fuck fuck fuck. it's happening again' I say in my head. I get up and walk to the woods.

"SHIT. WHY IS IT ALWAYS ME." I cry while sliding down a tree to sit down.

*suicide talk starts*

they were right. I should jump off that cliff. my breathing becomes ragged and unstable. I start to shake and my vision gets blurry.

(with Duncan)

'where did y/n go?' Duncan thought. but then a certain memory can across his mind.

*flashback*

"yeah I've had to move schools alot because of how much the people there bullied me and told me things that broke my mental health. I've been told to kill myself. multiple times. my biggest fear is being replaced and forgotten." I say.

me and Duncan were somewhere in the woods just talking. me and him have gotten kinda close but not that close.

*back to now*

Duncan pov:

"I fucked up. I fucked up bad." I say while standing up. I run. I don't know where I'm running to, but I'm running. wait, I'm running to find y/n. I check the cabin, I check the lodge, I check the bathroom. I check everywhere. wait, the woods.

your pov:

it's getting worse. this is the worst attack I've ever had. I start scratching my arm to try and regain neutrality. but nothing is working. I can't stand. I can't talk. I can't think.

Duncan pov:

shit shit shit. I hear them, but I don't know where they are. "Y/N" I yell to at least try. but alas, I don't hear a response.

your pov:

"Y/N"

I faintly hear my name but I can't respond. no matter how hard I try. my voice just won't come out. but I see some rocks. I pick one up and find the strength to throw it. I get one about a foot away from me. I pick up another one, this time I got it a little farther. the last rock, I throw it the farthest. then j hear rapid footsteps coming towards me.

"holy shit y/n. I'm so sorry. I'm a horrible person." Duncan says with tears in his eyes. he picks me up and puts me in his lap while he sits against the tree. he has his hand on the back of my head. 'this is nice' I think. Im still shaking. my throat is hoarse from crying. I'm weak from the energy I've been exerting.

after a good hour or two, I've finally calmed down. Duncan noticed it and asked, "do you wanna go back with the others or to the cabin?" it was around the afternoon and the challenge is over.

"I wanna go see Trent and Gwen." I say barely audible. "ok sweet cheeks let's go."

he picks me up and puts his arm around my waist and we begin walking.

"y/n omg I'm so sorry. I'm such a shitty person. please forgive me. I'll do anything." Gwen said while crying and hugging me. I hug back. "I forgive you. but please never do that again. promise?" "I promise." we break from the hug and I sit down. "fuck y/n. I'm so sorry, I'm a horrible friend. I shouldn't have said those things to you." Trent said while also crying. "please forgive me." "it's gonna take a while for me to forgive you. but I accept you're apology."

we all eat dinner and eve's drop the campfire ceremony. Tyler gets voted off. and we all go back to the cabins.

"y/n!"

"oh hey Duncan. what's up?"

"lemme walk you to your cabin."

"sure"

we begin walking and he says

"y/n. I think I like you. like I get nervous around you and I care about you a lot and when I saw you having that panic attack, I felt horrible because I knew I was the cause. but forget that, I want to be with you. I wanna be by your side through everything. even after this shit show."

"Duncan I like you too."

he closed the gap between us.

after a few minutes, we part.

"well good night sweet cheeks. think if me when you dream" he says

"I already do"

"WHAT" he says with the biggest blush on his face.

- - - - - - -

[slime-sandwhich-nom]

GUESS WHO'S BACK WITH HEADCANONS?

scu edition. You can tell I was struggling because I kept talking about charlie. Help me.

- charlie does not blame himself for banishment, he feels SUPER bad for Grizzly's death and whole corruption thing, but does not think it's his fault.

- bizly is kinda like nimona y'know? Always shapeshifts

- nobody can tell what charlie is. Is he a slime? Hybrid? Human? Something else? Nobody actually knows.

- no because, 100! Days charlie is the OPPOSITE of Godcicle (despite one being based on the other.)

Godcicle is not a perfect hero, he's childish, arrogant, never takes no as an answer, always thinks he's right,

But none of these things match 100!days, it's like if he's the better version of his god counterpart.

- condi was already a reptile hybrid before he became a god, nobody can't tell if he's a dragon, lizard or something else. His god powers probably messed that up.

- aside from charlie, the rest of council were all mortals who were turned into gods. (I LIKE THE "charlie was a god all along and was just playing around" THING OKAY?? IT MATCHES WITH WHY HE NEVER TALES THINGS SERIOUSLY)

- grizzly is actually the one who can cook. charlie can grow ANYTHING but can't cook for the life of him. mainly because he plays with the food rather than actually cook.

- Condi is like the mom of the group.

- they all listen to charlie because they are convinced he has more experience on the god stuff, but they don't quite realize that his "god stuff" is playing around with mortals.

- charlie breaks the fourth wall a lot.

- charlie calls his followers "subscribers".

- bizly was actually the one who gifted charlie the little slimes on Charlie's shoulder and head.

- and so charlie, gifted bizly beewee.

- grizzly gets constantly called a furry by everyone because he's a dog hybrid.

- charlie has no idea on how to be a normal guy. If he has to disguise as a mortal, he's SHIT at it.

Yes, the others know how to, they used to be mortals, but charlie? Has zero idea.

- charlie played it off as a game, but he really just made his mortals friends gods because he was... lonely and because he was scared of the inevitable death that soon would reach those three.

- grizzly IS a fucking furry. He's a DOG. FUCKIN DOGGY. like he's a small fluffy puppy dude. He just takes the form of a human. (The only shapeshifting he can do, really.)

You know his dog persona? Y'know his little mascot? That little DOG WITH HUMAN HANDS?

that's grizzly.

Why? BECAUSE IT'S FUCKING FUNNY KYLE

- charlie is not human. That's for sure.

- bizly glasses work like queen's glasses in deltarune.

- condi fav is probably charlie lmao

- bizly favorite unironically is grizzly

- you know that video of 100 players going against the gang? I imagine it just being charlie gathering a bunch of followers of his and said out of nowhere one morning "we have 100 people tracking us down!!!" To the others in the council.

- no, no one actually knows (aside from willbur) that each single slime in each single server is a different guy. (Simply because Wilbur has a similar situation)

Like, y'know slimes? How they split? Yeah. They were all part of one big slime, who knows where that is, and they one day split and become a slimecicle!

And some are oddly similar. (For pure coincidence, esmp and 100! Days are similar in design, despite not being really related in lore.)

Also, before anyone gets confused, 100!days is the only one who didn't come from the mother slime, he's an experiment.

The rest, yes.

But also remember that the whole splitting part is not literal(maybe who knows.) it was for you to understand,

They surely come from the same mother slime though!

It's like if they were created from the same thing and put in different parts of the world to interact.

Please it's late please understand bro

- bizly looks up to charlie, surprisingly

- after Grizzly's death and the defeat of the ender dragon, charlie was never seen again. It's like he dissapeared.

condi and bizly have NO clue of where he is.

- IF condi and bizly would ever meet a slimecicle, they wouldn't get any answers, aside from "nope, wrong guy! Nope, wrong slimecicle!"

- grizzly can't sleep with the lights off. He needs at least something on.

- charlie just can't sleep, he's an insomniac.

- we don't talk about condi sleep schedule.

- at least every, or well, most slimecicles gives the uncanny feeling. Look human, isn't human. The more you stare, the less human it looks.

- the slimes in slime story exist! They are all the slimes that can be found in the different biomes and places!

It was thanks to Bizly, creating them after charlie little silly doodles and ideas of random slimes he thought would be cool to have around the world.

It was like a little gift, and charlie reaction made it all worth it.

- the equivalent of going afk is the character stopping everything they are doing and just stare into space and be unresponsive until they come back, charlie is the only guy who says he went afk, though.

- charlie has BAGS under his eyes to the point you think he draws them to be dramatic.

- condi is just, idk I think someone dug under his eyes.

- somehow, despite charlie being an insomniac and quite literally developing a coffee addiction just to stay awake, he is the most energetic (after bizly)

- condi takes naps around.

- bizly is literally the youngest but he has a BEARD.

- grizzly bullying bizly in scu is the equivalent of Charlie's influence on him

- everyone was so mean to Bizly and for what. Now look at him he flinches whenever someone shouts.

- fallen and charlie have so much beef with each other that it's ridiculous at this point. They probably make out afterwards but fuck do I know they sound stupid (don't take this part seriously)

- Jschlatt is evil because he feels like it. He doesn't have a reason like fallen, he just wants to be evil because he woke up angry on a Monday.

Also he's a demon. Not a god.

- apparently it's canon (from what my 2am brain understood that night when I watched 100!days) that parallel universes exist in scu so GUESS WHAT MESS I CAN DO WITH IT WITH MY "THE SLIMECICLES" HEADCANON?

- each server is a different place. Dsmp? Qsmp? Esmp? All different places. All different slimecicles. All aware. All from the same place.

- condi probably does drugs man

- I need to stop talking about CHARLOE BUT I CANT

- charlie definitely has favorites. Bizly isn't one of them.

- NUH HUH JSCHLATT IS HIS FUCKING RAM CUTE PERSONA IN HERE. NO SCARY DUDE. NO. HE'S A FUCKING CUTE LITTLE RAM WITH HIS LITTLE SWEATER ON AND HE ALWAYS HAS TEO CATS HE PETS WHENEVER HE TALKS BECAUSE HE HAS T W O HANDS.

- charlie interacts with mortals so much because he's so fascinated by them. He surely think of them as just a little playmate (aside form a specific little mortals.) But he's so curious and interested in them. They come up with random drama over something so stupid, OVER LAND!

It's the best thing and the stupidest thing charlie has ever seen.

He loves it.

The rest of the council hates it, really. They experienced it, unlike charlie, and they know how awful mortals actually are. They are selfish and ruthless, they are SO glad they don't have to deal with them anymore. They can just ignore them.

- charlie actually gets so happy whenever a mortals donates something in the churches and whatever they make, the rest ignore those things.

- I'LL KEEP SPREADING THE WORD! GENDERFLUID SLIMECICLE. HE ISN'T HUMAN. HE HAS NO CONCEPT OF GENDER. HE'S SLIMECICLE.

- I bet condi just stopped caring about gender, he's just condi. (Not genderfluid, but agender.)

- charlie is extrovert shy. He's all confident but when he actually meets someone knew he gets super shy and quiet.

- bizly is extrovert.

- grizzly is ambivert.

- condi is introvert.

- condi and charlie spend their time together just by being in the same room, or literally "talks nonstop x listens"

- charlie likes doodling. He makes funny doodles. They look like kids drawings but it's just him having fun.

- bizly and charlie are "talks nonstop x also talks nonstop"

- grizzly and charlie are "sunshine x sunshine"

- they were very happy bro. Like. Seriously. Banishment ruined everything bro.

- Condi probably invented medications and all that stuff with his potions

- grizzly is super pissed because he can't eat chocolate

- so fallen now eats chocolate ANGRILY and AGGRESSIVELY but gets stuck in the bathroom for an hour or two later.

- I imagine fallen being that one villain who is actually evil and has good reasons behind them, but no one ever takes him seriously.

- fallen can't bring himself to hate the council. He's just really really mad at them.

- charlie is actually very nice to Bizly whenever they are alone. Whenever no one's watching charlie is a real sweetheart to Bizly.

- condi dosen't like talking much, so he always gets Charles to be his little talking box.

- grizzly is that one guy who uses the most fanciest words just to say he took a massive shit earlier.

- grizzly and bizly are morning people, condi and charlie are NOT.

- charlie is my favorite character therefore he's cursed in being a small self insert of mine along with all the trauma in the world.

- grizzly is a very touchy guy, he enjoys hugging and dragging people around. And he likes chasing sticks.

[littlepetbee]

i've had the house to myself this weekend so i decided to marathon a bunch of movies that have been on my watchlist for aaages. here they are ranked bc i love making lists lmao:

Game Night: this one was far and away my favorite...it's a fun, clever mystery that's also funny as shit. rachel mcadams is the queen of comedy and also waving a loaded gun around like a crazy person. fuckin 10/10, you guys

I Love You Phillip Morris: listen. i avoid jim carrey like the plague - it's nothing personal, his face just irritates the shit out of me. but i'm SO glad i gave this one a try anyway...it was so cute and touching and gay little ewan mcgregor with his gay little earring is genuinely the softest, sweetest thing to ever exist. it makes complete sense that someone would become a conman for him lmao. 10/10

Bullet Train: thee action comedy lbr!! shoutout to @seeinhindsight for reccing this one to me. it was so well done...with all the winding storylines and running gags it easily could have been a tonal mess, but i feel like they knocked it outta the park. also the steady stream of "oh shit this guy's in it too???" was fun as hell. 9/10 just bc some parts made me sad and my movie ratings are based solely on how they Make Me Feel, not any objectivity lol

Attack The Block: my brain the whole time: YEAH BOY(EGA)!!!! an alien invasion movie with a Message and pre-star wars john boyega?? that was always gonna be a slam dunk for me. though i do gotta say watching british movies as an american is always jarring as hell bc there's no guns. it feels like the weirdest kind of unreality. anyways 8/10

This Is Where I Leave You: slowing things down and getting way more Serious here but i was surprised by how much i liked this one (though maybe i shouldn't have been, since dysfunctional families/siblings are kinda my bread and butter lmao). the surprise lesbianism-slash-lowkey-polyamory definitely elevated it, too! 7/10

Shattered Glass: 100% the movie you gotta show people when they try to say hayden christensen sucks at his job bc uhhh he ate that shit up. not to be #me about it, but if that dude can be that fucking cute the whole time and still make me wanna throttle him within an inch of his life, you know he was doing something right. 6/10

As Above, So Below: i was bummed at first when i realized it was one of those found footage horror dealios, but i actually ended up really liking it. and honestly for the setting, i think found footage really was the only way to go. the concept was super interesting and the horror aspects were sufficiently creepy without being enough to give me nightmares, which is about all my babyass can handle. 6/10

Everybody Wants Some!!: yeah the hoechlin 80's movie lol. it was fun! the characters were likable for the most part! the vibes were good! but B's cannot live on vibes alone (that's a bible verse, i'm p sure) so i was left wondering what the Point was. i am not the target audience for hangout movies, i'll tell you that lmao. 3.5/10

so that's the list!!! all in all a very great way to spend a weekend <3

[oogaboogaspookyman]

Dayum i had a Murder Drones dream bruh

I'll tell ya the clips i remember from it, if any

Soooo there's a point where N is inside a school and he's looking around for sumthin' idfk and he stumbles upon a little girl drone with white eyes and i think jet black hair?? And she's obviously a fun lover that doesn't wanna be here but she recognizes it's a necessity so she rolls with it and does her stuff as told– okay so apparently she's gotta finish some homework about animals, what they are and what they do, the sort, and she's like- talking a lot about her home and how her family has to pay for wifi or sumthin' etc etc and N just goes "oh is that homework? Do you have to describe animals? I can help!"

And then the girl drone (who i'm calling Leni) just goes "yeah it's homework, boring but i gotta do it- it's something about animals, what they do and all- i sortaaaaa didn't finish it because i was bored out of my mind..." And N just spots a Sonic figurine on a shelf somewhere and goes "hey, what if you talked about that guy over there?" He means the Sonic figurine on the shelf, "what does a hedgehog do? Does it like anything? You could describe a hedgehog, it's an animal!" And Leni is just. "Heh, thanks dude!" And my lordy the smile N gives it kills me oughhhh yes baby boy you did a help a girl with homework!!! Uzi is lucky to have you ough

Another clip! There's the typical big dumb creepy guy that puts kids in detention trope! Yeah he just scruffs one like a cat and tosses them onto a hook, hanged like cloth (NOT HURT THOUGH! ALIVE AND HEALTHY!) And they're just "hey dude what did i do?! Get me off this thing!!" And the big creepy guy just. Giggles at 'em as he walks away. Idfk what else happened after that- but it has to do with N???? Did he fuck up????? He's a good boy who did no wrong wtf he stopped killing a long time ago!!! The Uzi simp allegations are exaggerrated!!!!!! Leave him alone bitch!!!!!!!!

So apparently the detention drone is just like. Roaming around the school, and N is just staying out of it's sight at all times– keeping Leni safe from it too because they're buddies now and he's a good boy– and at some point taps his foot on the floor lightly to make a sound to test if it can hear and... It does not. It's big stupid AND probably deaf. Or they're just lucky idk lol

Also Cyn is there too. There's a moment after the whole detention drone shebang where Cyn pops up behind some doors and is accompanied by like- another girl drone with ponytails and black hair that is also Solver infected, and she's already gotten the eldritch claws for hands too so she's probably been infected before even like- Camp Fever, to give you an idea of the time frame, and Cyn is just. "You said "shit" now you're getting punished" and apparently getting taken out of the school is a punishment??? They're just. Grabbed and Cyn fuckin' flies away with them both, leaving them with the rest of the gæng in a like- place with two random drop pods like the ones from episode 1 and 3, and fun fact! V and Uzi are there! They're alive and well! And yes N hugs Uzi first thing, ig Leni gets to meet the rest of the bunch now lol.

Oh yeah there's also Tessa i guess lmfao idk what she's lookin' for now

[bunchashapes]

any music recs?

i could have made this very short or entirely too long. i opted for the latter:

HAVE YOU LOOKED FOR SOME NEW MUSIC TO LISTEN TO? LOOK NO FURTHER, FOR HERE IS

I know. There's a lot of music out there. Well have no fear, because I've selected, organized AND categorized a fine number of music selections, just for you! I tried to keep it to just stuff you probably haven't heard of before, but I make no promises. Hopefully you'll find at least one new thing you can take with you into 2023.

MAKE YOUR SELECTION:

1 - MIKE, I'M LOOKING FOR SOMETHING TO GROOVE TO. SOMETHING I CAN GET DOWN AND VIBE WITH OR PERHAPS LISTEN TO WHILE I WORK:

Sounds good! Let's start with a few of those:

Vulfpeck - Okay you may already know about Vulfpeck. Sorry. If you HAVEN'T, they're a wonderful group of dudes from Michigan that are all insanely talented. They have a wide-range of styles they cover and pretty much every member has gone on to do other solo stuff, which may also suit your interests. They also have a spin-off band called The Fearless Flyers that I'll cover a little further down.

Jacob Mann (As well as his Big Band) - Jacob's solo stuff has a nice laid-back feel to it, while his big band stuff is slightly more bombastic, but all of it is fun and groovy. Great example of a musician effectively switching between different toolsets, whether its a whole group of talented musicians at his disposal or just a bunch of nice Roland presets.

EMEFE - They haven't been very active lately but EMEFE is an incredible ensemble with plenty of amazing music for you to listen to. Their live album from 2017 makes me wish i could go back in time and watch it live.

Louis Cole - Louis Cole's also pretty popular, but maybe you haven't heard of him! Originally hailing from Knower, he's collaborated with a ton of musicians (including Vulfpeck AND Jacob Mann Big Band, mentioned above) as well as produced an impressive array of solo music. I can't understate how much I love this guy.

Thundercat - Know who else he's collaborated with? Thundercat. Have you listened to Thundercat? You should really do yourself a favor and listen to Thundercat.

Sammy Rae and The Friends - Only learned about Sammy Rae very recently but The Feeling (linked) was an earworm that lodged itself in my brain for months. Infectiously positive vibes, a great ensemble and really brilliant singing.

Silk Sonic - Okay they played at the Grammys so it definitely doesn't count as a deep cut but listen to Silk Sonic anyway okay? Okay.

2- MIKE I NEED SOMETHING THAT WHIPS ASS. SOMETHING TO COMPLETELY KNOCK MY SOCKS OFF.

Can do. Your metric of kickass may vary but at least one of these should work for you:

King Gizzard and The Wizard Lizard - King Gizz has put out such an unbelievable volume of music that it's hard to just recommend ONE thing from them. I've linked Nonagon Infinity, a great little album with the fun gimmick of seamlessly looping front to back. They really haven't put out a single bad album, so just go wild.

Royal Blood - Royal blood's bassist plays through an octave pedal, giving their stuff this fuckin' beefy sound that's well-rounded enough you'd never guess the band is just a bassist and a dummer. Their style has gotten poppier lately but it's still all worth listening to.

Tricot - Tricot's been around for around 10 years now and their stuff has only gotten better over time. I feel like Math Rock is kind of an obtuse genre for most people but their recent stuff is absolutely worth checking out even if that's not your usual sort of thing. Makkuro (真っ黒) is my favorite album of theirs by far.

Thank You Scientist - Stranger Heads Prevail is probably one of my favorite prog albums ever and you'll probably like it too. Insanely good ensemble (the amazing triple threat of sax/trumpet/violin is such an integral part of their sound) and really fun vocals.

Nova Collective - Another incredible prog group. As far as I know they've only put out one album but it whips ass.

Ask My Bull - These guys popped out of the woodwork a few years ago and I've been obsessed with them ever since, I can't wait to see what they do next. If you're a horn-loving freak like me you absolutely need to listen to them.

Fearless Flyers - The previously aforementioned Vulfpeck spin-off band, guest starring Mark Lettieri of Snarky Puppy and the incredible Nate Smith on drums. Their album Tailwinds is easily one of my favorite albums ever, the addition of a sax trio takes their stuff from incredible to legendary.

Daikaiju - Kaiju-themed surf rock. That's really all that needs saying.

3 - MIKE I NEED SOMETHING THAT'LL MAKE ME SAY "DAMN THAT'S COOL"

Well you're in luck! A wide range of things fit the bill:

Snarky Puppy - A powerhouse jazz/funk/rock ensemble full of insanely talented musicians. Just give this song a listen, you won't regret it.

The Dear Hunter - Dear Hunter (not Deerhunter. Different band) has remained my favorite band since high school. The band has a number of different projects, A collection of EPs for each color of the rainbow, a 5-part rock opera/narrative concept album (with a 6th part that may be a movie??) and other more straightforward albums that still cover a broad range of genres and styles. I think they're great and hopefully you will too.

Hiromi Uehara - Hiromi's probably my favorite pianist ever. Just watch that video. She's ridiculous. She also plays in an incredible trio and guest stars on my favorite Tokyo Ska Paradise Orchestra song! Preposterously talented and insanely fun to watch. I love her.

The Bad Plus - Speaking of great trios, you can't go wrong with The Bad Plus! Really vibrant arrangements and generally incredible musicianship throughout their work.

Esperanza Spalding - Obscenely talented bassist AND singer AND songwriter. As someone who sings and plays bass (not at the same time, of course) watching her do effortlessly do both at the same time is mesmerizing. I love her.

Chon - Chon's also pretty big now but I want you to imagine you're me at a Dear Hunter (see above) concert back in 2015 and one of the opening bands walks onstage and you're like "well okay what's these guys' deal" and then they start playing these fucking insane picking solos in perfect unison. I literally couldn't believe what I was seeing. I wish everyone could experience Chon through those eyes.

4 - MIKE THOSE ARE COOL AND ALL BUT WHAT I'M REALLY LOOKING FOR IS SOME MUSIC TO GET BUNDLED UP AND GO TO SLEEP TO

You need ambient? I got your ambient right here.

Hiroshi Yoshimura - I was first exposed to the wide, wide world of Japanese ambient music back in college and in all my years since then, few things have been able to beat Yoshimura's atmospheric soundscapes. If you need music to shut your brain off (and who doesn't, from time to time), look no further.

Chihei Hatakeyama - Another Japanese ambient powerhouse, Hatakeyama's got a huge discography of music and all of it will knock your lights out (very pleasantly).

Green-House - Very much inspired by Japanese ambient, Green-house is described as "music for plants". I only wish there was more of it.

Joep Beving - Not exactly an ambient artist but a masterful practitioner of minimal, atmospheric piano. His style is understated but filled with emotion, a great mix of more classical elements with a modern cinematic flair. Great to work to!

5- MIKE EVERYONE'S TALKING ABOUT JAPANESE CITY POP, JAZZ FUSION AND EARLY ELECTRONIC MUSIC BUT I DON'T KNOW WHERE TO START. GET ME ON THE GROUND FLOOR HERE

You got it boss:

Yellow Magic Orchestra - You've probably heard of these guys by now. I've only known about them for 6-ish years after they had a moderate burst of fame here but I think it wouldn't be an exaggeration to say these guys were one of the principle pieces of genetic memory that coalesced into the DNA of modern electronic music. All three of the principle members, Ryuichi Sakamoto, Haruomi Hosono and Yukihiro Takahashi (rest in peace) have all had really prolific solo careers in a ton of styles of music that are all worth your time.

T Square - An absolute titan of Japanese jazz fusion, their album Adventures is a veritable Rosetta Stone of video game music, directly inspiring a good number of video game songs including the dang mario brothers theme! Their stuff is an absolute joy to listen to.

Tatsuro Yamashita - Yamashita is often called the king of city pop and is (according to wikipedia) credited for pioneering Japanese "soft rock". Having grown up on the pacific coast, there's some ineffable truth in his schmaltzy surf music that touches me deep in my soul. You may not have the same experiences as I do, but I hope listening to him will allow you to tap into that divine spark and enjoy it for yourself.

Masayoshi Takanaka - Perhaps not quite as famous as Yamashita, Takanaka is a brilliant guitarist and musician known for that same schmaltzy pacific rock (just look at that damn guitar. I love him) as well as a number of other styles of rock and jazz fusion. He's got a huge discography and it's all incredible.

Casiopea - I would be remiss if I didn't mention Casiopea. I'm not an expert in Japanese music obviously, but I think it'd be fair to say they and T-Square are the two titans holding the glory of late 70's-early 80's jazz fusion like Atlas shouldering the world. Do yourself a favor and listen to Mint Jams.

Himiko Kikuchi - Truthfully I don't know much of Kikuchi's discography other than Flying Beagle (linked) but she absolutely killed it. Do yourself a favor and listen to that too.

6 - WELL MIKE THAT'S ALL WELL AND GOOD BUT WHAT IF I WANT SOMETHING WEIRD THAT DOESN'T FIT IN ANY OF THOSE CATEGORIES

I'm always happy to recommend unconventional stuff. Here's a few albums that I love to close us out:

Tom Waits - Alice - First of all, you should listen to Tom Waits. I know you know him as the Funny Voice Guy but he's had such an incredible musical career that starts great and only gets more and more amazing over time. Anyway, in the 90's, Tom and his wife (and writing partner since the 80's) Kathleen Brennan were scoring weird experimental musicals in Germany, namely The Black Rider (also worth listening to) and Alice. The musical is a strange extrapolation of Alice in Wonderland, namely inspired by Charles Dodgson's (Lewis Carroll) relationship with Alice Liddell, generally accepted as the real-life inspiration for Alice. Though the actual specifics of their relationship are uncertain, the age discrepancy and Charles' general fixation with Alice leads many to assume....the worst about their relationship, an interpretation the musical runs with. The actual musical is hard to find evidence of (there's some documentary footage from the 90's and I've found the script) but Tom rearranged his music for the show and released it in 2002, which in my eyes is the definitive version of the music. The album is unbelievably melancholic, heart-wrenching, at times deeply uncomfortable, and absolutely filled with beauty. Lost in the Harbor is maybe one of my favorite songs of all time. If ANY of this sounds even slightly interesting to you, I implore you to check it out. It also has Colin Stetson on saxophone and clarinet, which segues quite nicely to the next album.....

Colin Stetson - New History Warfare Vol. 2 - You may have actually heard Colin's music before, he's scored films like Hereditary, Color Out Of Space and the newest Texas Chainsaw Massacre movie. New History Warfare is one of his experimental solo projects, most characterized by Stetson recording basically everything in a huge room filled with microphones, creating this incredible impression of scale. It's filled with some of the craziest shit I've ever heard someone do on a saxophone; long, galloping phrases with no pauses for air thanks to circular breathing, mixing in the sound of the valves opening and closing, and an incredible unnatural-sounding delay all achieved with live recording. The Righteous Wrath of An Honorable Man is one of the coolest things I've ever heard in my life (you've probably already heard it before) but the whole album is absolutely captivating.

Caroline Shaw - Partita for 8 Voices - Caroline Shaw is an amazing musician, singer and composer. All of her stuff is really beautiful and worth listening to, but few things stand out as much as this composition, written for and performed by a cappella group Roomful of Teeth (which is probably the sickest possible name for a choral group). I feel like a cappella music has a woefully bland perception among most people (thanks in no small part to Pitch Perfect); all lavish arrangements of pop music with absolutely no soul. If this is what you think all a cappella music is, I urge you to listen to this album. It's a masterful blend of speech, song and energy, filled with a vibrancy and passion I have a difficult time putting into words. You really just have to listen to it.

[periwinklemoonlight]

hot to go! ⋆ a jrwi suckening fic ⋆ 11.1k words

summary: shilo helps emizel get ready for his date with theo — many, many hijinks ensue.

if you prefer, you can read it on ao3!

⋆⋆⋆

Shilo sits content at the edge of his hotel bed, hands folded daintily in his lap and humming a simple melody. His eyes lazily drift around the room’s decor, taking in the curves and contours of each unfamiliar object and wondering how it might feel to sketch it, to commit it to memory in the ivory pages of the book that sits neatly on the edge of his nightstand. A soft blanket crinkles around his legs and bunches up where Grefgor sits cross-legged behind him, gently sliding a plastic hairbrush through Shilo’s tangled locks. Curtains sway back and forth ahead of him, letting the slightest hint of a cool breeze into the room and wash across his face. The digital clock across the room glows a vivid red, reading seven twenty-three p.m. and signaling the start of a whole new night ahead of them.

“That’s a pretty tune, my prince,” Grefgor comments absent-mindedly. “Does it have a name?”

Shilo snaps out of his sleepy trance, consciously re-straightening his posture. “Oh, no, I made it up just now.” 

“I wasn’t aware you were so musically inclined. I should be lucky to guard such a talented prince.” There’s something lightheartedly facetious, yet sincerely good natured to his tone. Strangely, Shilo notes somewhere in the back of his mind, it's almost a shock to be reminded of Grefgor's profession. He's never been allowed to befriend any of his guards the way he has with him these past few weeks, much less consider them a friend first and foremost. It's a welcome change, he thinks, and one he is happy to indulge in — even if it means being the subject of their banter sometimes.

Shilo smiles, feeling slightly embarrassed. “No, no. I think I much prefer the visual arts, you know? Painting, drawing, that sort of thing.” He glances at the small leather bound book on the nightstand. His gaze then drifts to the little brush, bristles stained with a dark kohl powder, next to it. 

“Oh!” He continues, “And-”

“MAKEUP!” A boisterous voice finishes his sentence for him as it nearly knocks down the door and Shilo off the bed in one fell swoop. Grefgor catches Shilo by the arm, stopping him before he slips onto the floor. After a moment of steadying themselves, the pair glance up to see a jittery-looking Emizel standing in the doorway.

“Shit, that was kinda loud. Sorry man.” Emizel runs his hand through his hair sheepishly. “But, like, it’s also kinda an emergency.”

Shilo shakes his head, mindlessly messing up the hair Grefgor had spent the past twenty minutes smoothing to perfection. “A… makeup emergency?”

Shilo looks his brother up and down. He’s completely barefaced, save for a few small red spots on his chin and forehead. Perhaps there are some things even vampirism can’t cure. Beyond his face, his entire outfit is a mess. Every article of clothing seems to be mismatched, including his shoes. Socks and sandals paired with — judging by how it appears at least three sizes too big — what can only be one of Arthur’s black loafers is a choice, to be sure. Not a good one, but a choice. 

“Yes? No? I don’t fucking-? Sorta. Arthur told me you know makeup. I need help with that. Makeup.”

“He wears it himself, does he not?”

“Yeah, but Broody McAsshole said he was too busy brooding to help me because he’s an asshole. So I’m here now. Can you help me out, dude?”

Shilo still looks baffled. “I mean, sure, but… what exactly is your problem?” Emizel stares at him for a second, then blinks.

“Oh, shit, yeah. Okay. Forgot about that part. Fuck.” 

Grefgor scoots beside Shilo and pats the bed next to him. “Come sit, my prince. I am also more than willing to assist you with whatever you need.” Emizel obliges, wiping his grubby face with grubbier hands. 

“Thanks, man. See, that's why I fuckin’ love you, Grefgor, dude. You’re always keeping it real as fuck. Like you’re always on some real shit.” Grefgor just smiles in the way Shilo has learned means he barely understood what was just said to him. 

Emizel pauses, as if to take a breath, before speaking. “I asked Theo out, and he, wow, he said yes. So we’re going on a date.”

Shilo clasps his hands under his chin delicately. “A date! Emizel, that is very exciting!”

“Indeed, my prince!” Grefgor agrees, nodding.

“Yeah, but like, here’s the problem. Now I've gotta figure out what to wear. Like usually I don’t give a shit about that kinda thing but now I’m like, oh fuck, this is actually a thing now, and I can’t just look like ass if we’re actually gonna be going out, out, you know?” Emizel moves his hands rapidly as he speaks, less gesturing than just moving for the sake of movement, cracking his knuckles a dozen times over and twisting his wrists so fast it makes Shilo’s head spin. 

“So you’d like me to help you look presentable for your date with Theo?” He asks, leaning in closer to speak to his brother and resting his chin on Grefgor’s shoulder to look over at him. His eyes are wide with wonder when he asks again: “Emizel, you are asking me to make you over?”

Emizel nods, then throws his hands over his face again when Shilo beams in response. 

“But none of that fancy shit, okay? This is a first date, it’s nothing crazy. Casual, even. Yeah. Super casual and like… chill.” Emizel’s words do nothing to dispel the twinkle in Shilo’s eye. 

“Oh, I can do casual! Yes! Now this is really exciting!” Shilo rises abruptly, dusting himself off before taking another look at his brother.

Incomprehensible is possibly the best and only word to describe his current outfit. Shilo can make out at least four different tops on his torso, the most visible of which displaying an oddly shaped yellow character. Emizel’s pants are in a similar state, each pair of shorts somehow baggier than the last and none of which secured by a belt. What concerns Shilo the most, though, is that the emerald cape flopping around his brother’s shoulders most definitely belongs to him, and that it was absolutely hanging in his closet before he went to sleep yesterday.

“Okay, so, whatever you’ve got going on right now, we are not doing that.” He pauses, furrowing his brow. “What even. What do you have going on right now. What was the thought process behind this.” 

Emizel just shrugs. “Was tryin’ stuff on. Thought I could save some time if I just didn’t take the last thing off when I put on a new one.”

“A… valid strategy, my prince,” Grefgor comments hesitantly. A brief concerned glance to Shilo confirms his true thoughts. 

“Grefgor do not enable him. Emizel, I am sure you could spare the five seconds it takes to remove your clothing from now on. We have plenty of time, don’t we?”

“Oh, nah, not really.” Emizel leans back with his elbows above his head until he lands on the cushiony bed with a soft thump. He glances up at the clock, which now reads seven thirty p.m. “The date’s in like, three hours? Eh, maybe closer to two now?”

“What.”

⋆⋆⋆

“Arthur!?” Shilo calls out loudly, practically slamming his door open. The sudden noise doesn’t seem to faze the older vampire, though his hair gets swept back from the force of the swing. Arthur stands in the hotel hallway just beyond the door, arms crossed impatiently and suspiciously missing a shoe. 

“Have you boys figured it out yet? I’d quite like my other shoe back now, thank you.” Emizel wobbly slips off the loafer and tosses it at Arthur, who catches it with ease and slides it back on in one swift motion. Void mrrps from around his shoulders. 

“Good. I assume you’re all sorted out, then?” 

“Arthur,” Shilo begins, stepping closer and voice a half-whisper. “Arthur, it is worse than I could have ever imagined.”

“We require your credited card immediately, my boy.” Grefgor continues from behind the prince. Arthur’s gaze briefly drifts behind the pair and over to Emizel, who is staring at a wall and mindlessly picking at his face. He sighs.

“What a pain.”

“Arthur, you must take us to the- the… the m…”

“The mall, my prince.”

“The mal! And direct us to the makeup store immediately!” At that, Arthur gets a faraway glint in his eyes.

“Vampire Sephora,” he says to no one in particular. “I'm familiar.”

Shilo blinks. 

“Alright. Well, there is no time to waste! Let’s go!” The young vampire announces as he strides down the hallway, heels clicking with every rushed step and an entourage of vampires at various energy levels following close behind. 

⋆⋆⋆

“Really, you two, we don’t have the time to be arguing about this right now,” Shilo remarks from the back seat of a Toyota Corolla that belonged to a really very nice librarian about five minutes prior. 

“That’s exactly what I’m saying, man!” Emizel says, throwing his hands up for emphasis. “I’m the only one in this car who even has a licence!” 

“I assure you, boy, I have driven countless times in my life. It would be much wiser to just let the more experienced driver take the wheel.”

“Horses and buggies don’t fucking count, asshole!” Arthur opens his mouth to speak. “And neither does your goddamn pennyfarting or whatever it’s called!” Emizel adds for good measure. 

“Emizel,” Arthur begins, pointedly choosing to ignore the previous comments, “The last time you operated a vehicle, you nearly hit over a dozen pedestrians. You ended up actually hitting even more. I am the only one here that can take us to our destination both quickly and safely.”

“Yeah, whatever dude,” Emizel shrugs, pushing Arthur out of the way and himself into the driver’s seat. “Come back when you get one of these bad boys, then we’ll talk.” He reaches into his fur lined jacket and pulls out a small, chipped plastic Learner’s Permit with an expiry date reading four months ago. Arthur eyes it for a moment, then sighs as he slots himself into the passenger seat. 

“Just try not to kill anyone,” he says, pinching his temple. 

“No promises!” Emizel grins as he swerves out of the hotel parking lot and immediately begins barreling down the road, nearly launching Shilo out of the car window as he grips onto Grefgor for dear unlife. 

“Besides,” Emizel says after a moment, tone much more casual —  possibly too casual for someone who just ran three red lights, “I thought you didn’t wanna come help me out, Brood. You told me to fuck off when I asked the first time.” Arthur sighs again.

“I did not say that,” he refutes. “And I am still not participating in the makeover. I’m just here to supervise, make sure that none of you boys get into trouble. Has it occurred to you that maybe I might have been more open to the idea initially if you weren’t actively withholding one of my shoes when you asked?”

“Nah. Honestly, I was thinking of it as a little extra motivation.” Emizel begins adjusting the car radio, switching it on to a local pop station as he cruises into oncoming traffic. 

An upbeat song suddenly begins blaring through the vehicle:

I could be the one, or your new addiction… 

“Oh hell yeah!” Emizel cheers. He looks over his shoulder at Shilo and Grefgor, who stare back in confusion. He smiles a toothy grin. 

“You guys like dances, right? You're gonna love this. When I say so, you two copy me, okay?” Shilo furrows his brow, but nods. 

“Eyes on the road, Emizel!” Arthur chastises with a rap on the shoulder. Emizel does as told, but it isn't long until the pre-chorus ends and he swivels once more. 

“Now!” He exclaims and begins waving his arms in the air to match the song, hitting Arthur twice in the process. Shilo and Grefgor try their best to keep up with his rapid movements, a tangle of limbs in the back seat.

“Emizel, what are we doing?” Shilo asks as he flails. One of his hands lands squarely on the top of Grefgor’s head, who momentarily squeezes his eyes shut on impact. A dozen unintelligible apologies waffle out of Shilo as he reels the offending hand back. 

“You’re fuckin’ hot to go dude, that's what!” Emizel replies. “You got it down now?” Before either of them can answer, Arthur lunges past Emizel’s roving arms.

“The wheel! The steering wheel, Emizel!” He coughs out, frantically straightening it. Void hops from his shoulders into Shilo’s lap, startled by her owner’s sudden movement. Shilo yelps at her as the car veers over into the correct lane. 

“It’s literally fine man! It straightens itself! I usually don’t even bother with it anyways!” He returns his attention to Grefgor and Shilo. “So you guys think you got it or what? The chorus is coming up again!” 

“Y-yes my prince?” Grefgor replies, though it sounds more like a question than an answer. Shilo makes a non-committal noise, adjusting to the sudden cat in his lap. 

“And again!” Emizel announces with glee, completely disregarding Arthur in front of him. He starts the dance again, and this time Shilo finds himself able to mostly keep up with the moves, only briefly brushing Grefgor in the process. By the time the chorus comes around again, a smile escapes Shilo’s lips when all three of them are doing it together. 

“Easy, right?” his brother asks. “Theo taught me last week!”

“Yes, now that I have learned it! Oh, Emizel, you should teach Arthur now!”

“He will be doing no such thing! When does this song end?” Arthur grumbles.

“Ignore him, Shilo. I knew he’d be a hater, that’s why I only taught you guys.” Emizel sings along with the end of the song, finally turning back around once it starts to fade out. 

“See, Arthur? It was fine!” He teases, putting his hands back on the wheel. Arthur straightens himself up and decidedly switches off the radio. 

“It-” he coughs again, “-absolutely was not. No more music for the rest of the ride.” Void hops back onto his shoulders with a soft mrrp. Emizel blows a raspberry.

“Can’t do anything around here these days.” He complies despite his protests, though Shilo can’t tell if it’s of his own volition or the death glare his brother receives from Arthur each time he eyes the radio dial. 

When Emizel stops swerving and the mall is finally in sight, Shilo dares to peer forward from the back seat and check the time. Seven fifty-two p.m. Huh. Well, for all his road safety faults, at least Emizel is fast.

⋆⋆⋆

Shilo, after taking several very necessary moments to instruct Emizel to please remove three of his five layers and another few to marvel at the revolving glass door, steps inside the vast mall with the others in tow. His hastily-tied heels click against the tiled floor, followed close behind by the softer taps of leather boots and loafers, and finally topped off by a single socked sandal. 

“You don’t think someone’s gonna ask me why I only have one shoe on?” Emizel ponders, catching up to walk alongside his brother. 

“Better they ask about that than the blood stains all over your hoodie,” Arthur answers stiffly, clearly itching to add an additional comment about the shoes.

“It’s not my fault I got hungry, man. Concentrating on driving takes a lot out of me.”

“I’m sure it does.”

“Arthur, you said you are familiar with the vampire Sephora?” Shilo asks, glancing around the bustling mall and trying his best not to get lost in the throngs of passing shoppers —  both vampire and human alike from the looks of it. “She must be quite the businesswoman to sell cosmetics to all of these people by herself.”

“Something like that, yes,” Arthur says vaguely, taking the front of the group and gesturing for the others to follow. He weaves them through crowded eateries and past a funny looking moving staircase to the fabled store, hesitating at the entrance.

“What’s up Arthur, man?” Emizel asks with a gentle elbow. Arthur pauses for another moment before shaking his head and entering the store with the others.

“Nothing, boy. What are we looking for?” Emizel turns to his twin, who is presently gawking at the sheer amount of products lining the walls.

“Shilo, what are we looking for?” Shilo places a hand under his chin to think and leans against the nearest wall, which happens to be Grefgor. 

“Well, how would you like to look, Emizel?”

“Fucking dope, preferably. But, uh, covering up my acne would be nice. And I like that spooky eyeliner-eyeshadow thing you do sometimes, too. Is that good?” Shilo nods slowly in understanding, then gestures for Grefgor to lean down. The prince promptly cups his mouth with his hands and whispers into his guard’s ear.

“Grefgor, I believe we are in deep trouble. I had no idea there were so many makeup products. Frankly? It is overwhelming. I don’t know what half of these things on the shelves are and I am very quickly realizing I may not be as well versed in the cosmetic world as I once thought but also that it is far too late now to admit this to Emizel and also that he and Arthur are staring at us very suspiciously.” Grefgor nods severely, opening his mouth to reply far too loudly and stopping when Shilo hurriedly presses a finger to his lips. 

“I know exactly what we need,” he announces, whipping himself back around with his hand still on Grefgor’s mouth. 

“What was that just now?” Emizel asks.

“I was just consulting Grefgor for his opinion,” Shilo says matter-of-factly. “He is also quite knowledgeable in the makeup department, you know.” A single drop of sweat drips down Grefgor’s forehead.

“Really? ‘Cause I don’t think you let him even get a word in.”

“Of course. That is the proper etiquette for consulting guards at Umbra Castle, Emizel.” Emizel seems to consider this, then shrugs. 

“Europeans, am I right?” He elbows Arthur again with a grin and continues forward, ignoring the unamused and slightly concerned expression he receives. 

After a moment, Shilo leans back over to Grefgor.

“You do not actually have any advice for us, right Grefgor?” He asks, voice soft.

“No, my prince. I only know as much as you have taught me. Apologies.” 

Shilo sighs. “That is alright.” 

He wanders around a few aisles, inspecting the various products and displays and trying to soak in as much knowledge as possible while appearing to be deeply considering the ramifications of choosing shade 001 over 000. Grefgor peers over his shoulder, mimicking his thoughtful pose. 

“What have you gathered from here, my prince?” He asks, watching as Shilo turns two tubes of pale concealer around in his hands.

“Many things, Grefgor. And also nothing at all. There is so much in this world I do not understand, even in my immortal unlife I fear I may never have the time to learn it all.” He lifts the grayer shade higher. “This is definitely Emizel’s shade, though.”

“Great call, my prince. Speaking of, we appear to have lost him.” Shilo blinks as he slips the tube into Grefgor’s hand.

“Lost him? What do you mean lost him?” he asks, swiveling his head left and right as Grefgor expertly removes the barcode from the product with suspiciously well practised hands. Emizel is nowhere to be found, evidently having slipped off somewhere while Shilo was trying very hard to look like he understood what he was perusing. 

“Arthur?” Shilo calls, noticing the other man had also vanished. At the sound, Void’s head pops up from behind a distant shelf, locking eyes with Shilo and letting out a small meow. Shilo dashes towards her, nearly tripping on the wrinkled cape hastily pinned to his shirt. He sees Arthur first, arms folded and doing his best to give as little input as possible as Emizel shoves various products in his face. 

“Shilo! There you are, man!” Emizel says as he pushes past Arthur. “You really gotta stop running off like that. I know you said you had a plan, but I saw some cool looking sparkly shit and then some other colourful stuff and- You know what? Here. You can tell me if they suck shit. Or something. This guy still insists on being useless.” He presses a handful of items into Shilo’s hands. 

“I’m here for supervision purposes only,” Arthur insists, though his glasses only barely hide the way he eyes the smokey palette to his left. Shilo examines the products, setting a few down onto a ledge and holding up a dark eyeshadow palette. He squints his eyes theatrically and nods firmly. 

“Yes… A splendiferous choice, Emizel. The pigments, they are… strong! And vigorous! It is good. Yes.” He places the palette back down and picks up a small bottle of liquid eyeliner, taking a moment before shaking his head disapprovingly.

“Emizel, I’m afraid this product very clearly has an ancient curse placed upon it. You must remove it immediately unless you would like us all to be blown to smithereens.” Emizel’s eyes widen as he snatches back the bottle, haphazardly tossing it into the aisle behind him. Shilo glimpses at Grefgor nervously as he picks up the next item.

“Excellent observation, my prince. Yes, that item would have instantly vaporized us upon its opening.” Grefgor offers. “You have a trained cosmetic eye, indeed.” Shilo exhales slightly, relaxing his shoulders and turning back to see the product he picked up — a dark red lip gloss very obnoxiously and lasciviously labelled ‘VAMPIRE SEX BLAST’. He deflates with a cartoonish frown, pointed ears flopping down.

“Emizel we are not getting Vampire Sex Blast.” 

Emizel crosses his arms. “Give me one good reason why not.”

“Wh- It is called Vampire Sex Blast!” Shilo exclaims. 

“Yeah, and that fuckin’ rips!” Before Shilo can offer a really very reasonable counter argument, a concerned-looking woman with a ponytail slicked back into an afro puff and dressed in all black appears ominously at the end of the aisle.

She looks pointedly at the products strewn across the floor before glancing at the bickering brothers with an unamused expression. Shilo, oblivious to her discontentment, tosses Vampire Sex Blast away excitedly, lighting up as he notices the capital letters printed across the right side of her shirt.

“Ah, so you are the vampire Sephora!” He beams, clasping his hands together. “It is very nice to meet you! I am Prince Shilo Bathroy of the Ventrue clan. I have heard about your business ventures!” The woman furrows her brow slightly, looking as if she’s about to say something when Arthur steps up beside Shilo and places a hand on his shoulder. 

“Sorry about the disturbance, miss. Don’t mind him,” he says as flatly as he can, trying to swiftly brush past Shilo’s introduction. “We were just having a bit of a heated discussion. My boys can be very… particular about this sort of thing. I’m sure you understand.” 

“No worries, sir.” Her tone strongly indicates that there is, in fact, a worry, but she momentarily flashes him a fanged smile. “Well, if you or your sons are looking for anything specific, I would be happy to help you out.” She looks back between Shilo and Emizel, seemingly ignorant of the way Arthur sputters incredulously at her words. 

“So you are… not the vampire Sephora?” Shilo asks. 

Arthur sighs and leans down next to him. “Shilo,” he says, in a rather fatherly manner considering his disbelief just seconds ago, “I fear I may have misled you. There is no vampire named Sephora. This is just a Sephora for vampires.”

Shilo’s voice is small. “...What?”

“I’m sorry, prince. I should not have let this go so far. It is true that when I was last he-”

“Actually, sir…” She pauses, staring down Shilo with squinted eyes before seemingly deciding on something and mumbling, “Hmm. She may approve. Miss Sephora is in today, if the little prince wanted to speak to her. Follow me.” She turns and, despite her invitation to follow, faces the shelf next to her and picks up a rogue brush, instantly distracted with picking at the bristles. 

“She’s what,” Arthur says dully, what was left of the light in his eyes suddenly vanishing as his glasses slide all the way down his nose with shock. That light immediately transfers to Shilo tenfold as his eyes widen gleefully.

“Oh! I would love that! Yes! Thank you, Aaaa…” Shilo cranes his head around to read her name tag, “Sha- Shakira!”

“Wrong,” she replies, but makes no move to correct him. “Now, come on.” She slips the brush into her pocket and disappears around the corner, singing an unrecognisable tune, the puff on the top of her head peeking over the aisles as she walks. The group does as told, except Arthur, who is still frozen in place with an appalled expression. Emizel snaps him back to reality with a sharp elbow, and he finally follows suit, pushing his glasses up again and hardening his expression once more. 

“What is up with you, man?” Emizel pesters with a grin, clearly amused by Arthur’s bizarre behaviour. They follow the mysterious employee to the back of the store, passing by other intrigued workers with waves of varying degrees of politeness. Finally, they reach another woman, her back turned to them and looking over the contents of a cardboard box. Her hair is impossibly long and shiny, thin braids cascading down her back and flowing like a waterfall as she moves. 

“Miss Sephora? This little prince  —  he said his name was Sheila  —  would like to speak with you.” When she turns, Shilo instantly feels like he recognizes her. It’s almost impossible to pin her as anything other than Toreador, for a start, considering her face of full glam makeup and the numerous pieces of jewelry dangling from her ears, neck, and wrists. She blinks her long false eyelashes at Shilo, studying him curiously. 

“Hello!” He greets her with a wave. “My name is Prince Shilo Bathroy of the Ventrue clan. It is very wonderful to meet you!”

“Bathroy?” She repeats, her gaze intensified by the bold makeup around her eyes. A subtle tinge of a Southern accent paints her voice. “It’s been a long time since I’ve heard that name. You’re a long way from home, aren't you?”

“Ah. Yes, I am. You… are the vampire Sephora, yes? My friend Arthur here has told me about your business enterprise.” Sephora gazes up at Arthur, who looks like he’s about to hurl. 

“Is that so?” She asks, making eye contact with him. He doesn’t react. “Well, yes, I am. I’m surprised you don’t recognize me, Prince Shilo. I was sure your mother would’ve at least kept me in the history books.”

“You knew my mother?” 

Sephora smiles. “Sure did. I lived in that big castle of yours, too, once upon a time. Back when I was Primogen. A long, long time ago now.” Even Arthur seems shocked at the revelation. The peculiar employee, meanwhile, is typing up a storm on her phone. 

“How long ago?” Emizel pipes up. “Like, did you know any, uh, vampire dinosaurs or some shit?” Sephora looks at him disparagingly. 

“Yes.”

Brushing past that, Shilo looks at her intently. “So you were a Primogen! Tell me, why did you leave? I am very interested.” Sephora spreads her arms out, gesturing around her. 

“To start my business, of course! And it was the best damn decision I ever made, I’ll tell you that. I haven't kept up with vampire news for decades! But enough about me, prince. What brings you here?”

“Ah!” Shilo claps. “I am here to help my brother shop for his date. He has given me permission to make him over, which-”, he looks over to Emizel, “-I am very excited about!”

“There’s… two of you?” Sephora asks, grimacing as she watches Emizel pick his nose. 

“Yes! Here, this is my brother Emizel, and my friends Arthur and Grefgor!” A meow. “And Void!” Sephora tilts her head in consideration, gaze lingering on Arthur for an uncomfortable second. Grefgor straightens himself, pushing his shoulders back before speaking. 

“We have come to request your assistance with this task, my, uh, ex-Primogen…?”

“‘Manager’ is fine.”

“-My girlboss.” Grefgor leans over to Shilo. “I learned that one from the tiny lightbox!”

“Advice, hm? Well, for starters, yo-” A loud ringtone cuts her off: -is you say daaaaddy’s hooooome…

The group glances over to the source of the sound — reactions ranging from deeply uncomfortable to downright thrilled — while the employee looks up from her phone nonchalantly. “Sorry guys. My shift was supposed to end an hour ago but apparently my ride got bit by some dipshit outside the mall. This is really entertaining, though. Keep going.” Now distracted by her phone call, the employee, just as ominously as she appeared, walks backwards out of the store. Four pairs of eyes, some more feline than others, side eye Emizel.

Simultaneously, they recall the mess of watching him fumble sneaking into that poor person’s car, first attempting to get in through the trunk and resorting to nose-diving through the passenger side window when that didn't work. It was still an impressive feat, all things considered, especially since the car was still moving when he did it. Less impressively, though, was him then biting their wrist while it was steering the vehicle and promptly crashing the both of them into a tree. 

‘Nerves’, he chalked it up to. ‘Stupidity’ was Arthur’s working theory.

Emizel smiles obtusely. “Tasted like Subway.”

“Well,” Sephora says, making her way in front of the group and beginning to lead them out of the back of the store as well. “I suppose I can spare a free consultation for the prince. If you’d send my regards to your mother, of course.”

Shilo inhales. “Of course.”

When Sephora steps into the main area of the store, her Presence is palpable. Every head, employee and customer, vampire and human alike, whirls to look at her, dropping whatever they're doing before Sephora waves a casual hand to dismiss their leering gazes. 

“So, what made you settle in L.A.?” Shilo asks as he follows her, clearly affected by the sudden eyes on the group.

“Oh, I don’t live here, Prince. I’m just visiting this little branch while I’m in town. See, my sister told me she was going to the Elysium at that old club downtown and I thought, well, I could drop by and say hello, but I ended up missing the party by a whole night. A real shame too, I heard it was fire.” The group collectively grits their teeth behind her. 

They stop at an aisle mirror, close to where they had previously tossed products around. Shilo excitedly places his brother in front of it, taking him by the shoulders and adjusting him so he stands in the center. He watches as Sephora takes a good long look at his brother, then walks into the nearby aisle. She chats leisurely with Shilo as she picks up various items from the counter and hands them back to him with a nod. She disappears into another adjacent aisle and returns with a few new ones, including a fancy-looking powder and small eyeliner pencil.

“Now, remember, these are all just suggestions,” She says. She makes an odd face until her eyes widen almost imperceptibly, as if with epiphany. “But remember… for some people… it might be more practical to look… within, for beauty.”

“Yeah man, I’m always saying that,” Emizel agrees, idly scratching his ass. Sephora squints at him.

“One more recommendation, if I may,” She says, reaching over to another aisle and placing a stick of deodorant in Emizel’s hand. 

“Oh, you guys sell snacks here too? Thanks,” He promptly takes a bite. 

Sephora's eye twitches. She peers at Arthur out of the corner of her eye. “You're paying for that.” 

Arthur gulps.”Gawrsh!”

As the group files out, thanking Sephora for her help, she sets a hand on Arthur’s shoulder, stopping him in his tracks. Slowly, he cranes his head over to make hesitant eye contact. She gives him an unreadable smile. He trembles.

“Nice to see you in my store again, Arthur Bennett. Takes a lot of guts to come back after what happened last time.”

The walk to the next store is mostly silent, at least on Arthur's part. 

⋆⋆⋆

“Alright,” Shilo begins, scanning the shelves of the Hot Topic. “What sort of occasion is this date of yours, Emizel?”

“I told you, man. It’s just, like, casual. Super casual. Honestly I could show up with what I’m wearing right now, it’s so casual. Or nothing at all, even. I could be butt ass naked and it would be so chill. Fuckin’… yeah.” Emizel looks more and more nervous with every word that rambles out of his mouth. 

“Some clothes would be wise,” Arthur mutters, fiddling with a hanging necklace. A quick glance in his direction reveals Void peeking her head and paws curiously out of the Sephora bag around his wrist, evidently having abandoned Arthur’s shoulders in favour of being escorted like a chihuahua. Almost identically to her owner, she paws at a chain necklace, curiously watching the metal glitter in the fluorescent lights of the store. 

“Yes…” Shilo agrees distractedly, disappearing into a clothing rack almost immediately after and emerging with a black frilly dress shirt — remarkably similar to the one he currently wears — in his hands. “Something like this, then?”

“No way, dude,” Emizel shakes his head. “I said casual! Plus, that literally looks exactly like what you’re wearing right now.” 

Shilo furrows his brow, gesturing to his chest. His fingers brush against the twin columns of ruffles that cascade down the silky fabric. “Yes? This is my casual shirt.”

“You have got to be kidding me.”

“I'm not! I even forwent a waistcoat, I was in such a hurry to get us out the door!” He suddenly looks embarrassed, a tinge of pink painting his cheeks. “Oh, no. This was not the proper attire to meet someone as distinguished as the vampire Sephora. And certainly not befitting of a prince! Grefgor, Grefgor, do you think she believes me to be lowly?”

Grefgor’s expression is a mix of solemn and stony as he makes contact with Shilo’s large, pleading eyes staring up at him. “Never, my prince.”

Despite looking reassured, Shilo still collapses against his guard, sticking his pointed nose against his chestplate like an awkward woodpecker as Grefgor pats his back sympathetically. 

“Look,” Emizel says, “How about we all just pick out some shit ourselves and I’ll try it on? That way everyone gets their input.” Murmurs of agreement, some more muffled than others, ring out through the group, and they get to work, keeping a watchful eye of the clock that now reads eight forty-one. 

When everyone is done, Shilo tosses a barrage of clothes into Emizel’s arms and marches him into the dressing room, shutting the door a little too loudly behind him. Various struggled noises surge out of the room soon after, including several deafening crashes, a slide whistle, a squeaky ball bouncing, and a particularly painful fall — judging by the resounding FUCK! afterwards, at least.

Finally, looking a little worse for wear, Emizel emerges from the dressing room. He’s dressed in all black and wearing possibly more layers than he began with, somehow. He sports a long trench coat overtop of a black button-up and vest, long straight-legged dress pants and leather ankle boots, accessorised with three necklaces of various lengths, black leather fingerless gloves, and a chain that hangs at his waist.

“I don’t know about this, Arthur, man,” he says, doing a spin upon the request of a quizzical-looking Shilo. “I look like I have a bomb.”

Arthur pushes his glasses up his nose, then, with a long, drawn out sigh, makes a dismissive gesture for Emizel to return to the dressing room and hangs his head. Void meows sympathetically. 

When he comes out this time, he’s wearing a shirt printed to look like a naked chest, one that very much does not match his own body type, paired with cargo jorts, knee high socks with the same square yellow character as the hoodie he discarded, blindingly red oversized crocs, and a hat with a cup holder and straw on either side. The cap is proudly embroidered with the words ‘I EAT DRYWALL’ and topped off by a single spinning propeller. Underneath it all is a black bodysuit made of thick fabric, a pattern resembling the skeletal system just visible on his limbs and his… unzipped fly. Shilo screams instantly upon seeing him, hurling his cape at his horrifically dressed brother with enough adrenaline-enhanced strength to knock him backwards into the dressing room again and out of his sight. 

“My prince! Are you alright?” Grefgor asks, looking unsure even to himself which prince he’s referring to. 

“I’m chilling,” Emizel replies from under a pile of clothes, his tone the verbal equivalent of a thumbs up. Shilo, meanwhile, has both hands on the sides of his head.

“Emizel, I don’t even want to know where you got that from, but you are absolutely not going on a date wearing some poor human’s skin! That is horrific!” Laughter bubbles out from the dressing room, much to Shilo’s dismay. “And you are laughing about it!?”

“No, Shilo, man! Here! Look!” Emizel calls between laughs, tossing the skin-shirt over the room door. Shilo screams again as it flies his way, ducking under the arm that Grefgor lifts to perfectly catch it midair. 

“Grefgor I do not want to even look at it,” Shilo mumbles, gaze locked on the floor. Grefgor pinches the material, moving it around with his gloved fingertips briefly. 

“It appears to… actually just be fabric, my prince,” He concludes. Shilo stands back up.

“Oh shit, for real?” Reluctantly, he also outstretches a hand to feel the fabric. It is, indeed, fabric. “Okay, well, it is still terrible and horrible and I would like it out of my sight immediately. Perhaps just remove it from this world entirely.”

“Right away, my prince,” Grefgor nods, pulling out a match from somewhere in his armour and promptly marching out of the Hot Topic, returning a minute later with an uncharacteristically harrowed look in his eyes. 

“Grefgor did what had to be done, my prince.”

“Thank you, Grefgor,” Shilo says solemnly. “Emizel, please change now before I am compelled to set the rest of that outfit on fire with you in it.” Emizel blows a raspberry.

The next time he emerges, Emizel wears a costume that upon first glance, seems fairly similar to Grefgor’s usual metal-clad attire. With further inspection though, it becomes glaringly obvious that all his ‘armour’ is soft and squishy, and that there are obnoxious Party City tags hanging off of his elbow. Every head turns to Grefgor.

“Grefgor, why is this costume from the City of Parties?”

“I made a quick pit stop after I was finished disposing of the offending shirt, my prince.”

“But you were only gone for like a minute?”

Grefgor sniffs. “Yes.”

Emizel waves his arms around stiffly, seemingly unable to bend his elbows — or put his arms down. “I think you got this in the kid’s sizes, man. I feel like a penguin.”

Grefgor tries very hard not to smile. “No, my prince, this is exactly how it should be worn. You may feel like a penguin, but you are indeed now a strong and glorious bird, ready to defend your beloved from all harm that may come his way on your excursion.”

Arthur sighs and shakes his head. “Don’t lie to the boy. Everyone knows that penguins are not birds.” The face Shilo makes is indescribable.

“So is this what I’m going with? I’m not hearing any objections,” Emizel asks nervously.

“No! No. No. You have yet to try on my pick. Then we will decide,” Shilo says, holding up a finger. He pushes his barely mobile brother back into the dressing room, practically sliding him across the floor. He lands with another loud crash. 

“Um. Shilo?” He asks, voice muffled. “Can you help me out here? I’m… kinda stuck.” Shilo turns back around, opening the dressing room door to find his brother collapsed face-down on the floor, wrapped up in the tiny knight costume with his limbs restrained at his sides like a worm. 

Shilo begins to help his brother up, his laugh quickly turning into a yelp as Emizel springs up from his worm facade and the door slams behind them. Arthur, Grefgor, and Void share a look as an onslaught of sounds blast out from the room: more crashes, a spring being launched into the air, a cuckoo clock chiming, and a Wilhelm scream. 

“My? My princes? Are you alright in there?”

A flurry of dust bursts out from behind the twins when the door opens. 

Shilo’s eyes are wide and haunted when he emerges, completely unmoving save for his twitching left eye and hands which are quickly being balled into shaky fists. His outfit is… suspiciously familiar. Emizel, in contrast, looks pretentious, faux adjusting the emerald cape now pinned to his ruffled white shirt — the very same one Shilo was wearing moments before.

“I always wondered whether this getup would fit me,” Emizel thinks out loud, comically calm for the manoeuvre he just pulled. 

“Emizel. Why did you have. Two of them?” Shilo rumbles through gritted teeth. The prince can barely contain his rage, wearing the very same shirt he instructed Grefgor to destroy just minutes ago. Emizel blows air at the top of Shilo’s head, now able to reach it with the poorly tied heels on his feet. The propeller on his hat spins stupidly.

“I figured something like that would happen,” He grins with all his teeth. 

Grefgor is blinking rapidly, pivoting his head back and forth between the two. “My pr. My. My prince. My princes.” He reaches out a hand to tap Arthur on the shoulder and flinches when he lands on thin air. He looks over his shoulder to find Arthur and Void talking down an extremely concerned looking employee, the latter of which continuously glancing over to the three of them at the dressing room. When Grefgor turns back around, Emizel is smiling at him dopily while Shilo death glares at nothing in particular, propeller still spinning. An involuntary snort escapes his nose at the tableau before him. 

Grefgor’s smile drops when he notices a crazed look in Shilo’s eyes finally surface, instantly springing into action to restrain his prince from mauling his brother and all adjacent employees. “My apologies, my prince. I am so sorry, my prince. I believe I have a cold. Please forgive me, my prince, it was just a sneeze. Please stop thrashing, my prince. My prince.”

Grefgor holds him under his arm like a football, restricting him from moving away but allowing his limbs plenty of flailing room as he dangles in place. Emizel’s eyes are wide, eyebrows raised and mouth pulled into a long, thin line as he watches his brother swipe at him.

“Oh shit, is he fucking frenzying?”

Grefgor tightens his grip ever so slightly, hoisting Shilo upwards. “It. It would appear that way, my prince.”

Arthur finishes talking to the employee and turns back around to see the polite little prince hissing and snarling like a wild animal, swiping and baring his fangs at his brother — inexplicably wearing his clothes — as Grefgor awkwardly presses him against his side with one hand and scratches his head with the other. Arthur blinks. He turns himself around a hundred and eighty degrees and begins heading towards the exit. 

“My- My boy!” Grefgor calls after him. Arthur stops in his tracks, sighs dramatically, and turns back around again. He reaches into his coat pocket as he approaches, pulling out his flask. 

“Oh, no alcohol in the store, please, sir-,” an employee attempts as he strides right past them. Arthur stops when he reaches his boys, closing his eyes and shaking his head for a moment. Void meows in agreement from the Sephora bag. 

“Shilo,” he says simply, approaching the boy. He leans down, unscrewing the cap of his flask before carefully pouring its contents into his mouth. Blood drips down his chin and stains his already terrible shirt further. After a few seconds, Shilo blinks and stops flailing, now hanging limply in Grefgor’s arm. Gently, he rotates his prince upright and stands him back up. 

Shilo inhales sharply, instinctively going to readjust his clothing and finding nothing of value when he does. He wipes the blood from his chin with his shoulder and exhales. 

“I think- I think we are done here.” He looks humiliated, his cheeks so bright pink the others look monochrome in comparison. The corners of his eyes glisten red with the threat of tears. 

“Aw, Shilo, hey, I’m sorry man,” Emizel puts a hand on his shoulder, still bloody. “I didn’t think you’d freak out like that. But, uh, don’t go yet, okay? I still gotta try on your outfit, don’t I? The. Shit. The one you picked out for me, not the-” He’s cut off by the sound of shaky laughter next to him as Shilo shrugs off his hand. 

“You’re right, you’re right. This shirt is absolutely getting destroyed, though.” 

The next time Emizel exits the dressing room, he’s preceded by Shilo, who, now back to his regular outfit, excitedly spreads his arms out to present his brother. He sports a long, white collared shirt with a grayish-blue tie tied loosely around his neck, an open vest just barely visible underneath his oversized leather Demons jacket, a studded belt weaved in between the loops of dark baggy jeans, and clean black sneakers. Even Emizel seems stunned by how good it looks. 

“So? What do you all think? I tried to take your ‘casual’ advice to heart, as much as it hurt me to do, but I thought it would be best if I were to try to match your style a little more.”

“Yeah dude, I mean, fuck. This is actually pretty nice. I fuck with this.” Shilo does a great rendition of Grefgor’s patented confused smile.

“Well, if my princes approve, then so do I,” Grefgor declares, giving Shilo a warm look. 

“It’s suitable,” Arthur approves. “Although, I still believe you should try wearing pants that fit you one of these days.” 

“I’m only going to wear pants that go up to my ankles from now on because you said that. I’m gonna fucking waddle around forever now ‘cause you said that to me.”

“Then you really would be a penguin, my prince!”

With a grin, Emizel goes back to the dressing room and changes into his original terrible look (plus some new yellow socks), then stuffs the chosen outfit into a tote bag from a nearby display. He loops the bag  — reading VAMPIRE BABE in sparkling gothic font — around his shoulder. The group begins to leave the store when a loud beeping suddenly assaults their ears. An employee rushes towards them.

“Excuse me, sir, I think you forgot to pay for an item you have there.” 

Shilo looks bewildered at the employee, but a staunch bout of eye contact accompanies his next words. “What? Oh, we will not be doing that. Thank you for the suggestion, though.”

The employee blinks, and their eyes glaze over. ‘Huh. Alright then. Have a nice day, sir.”

“I will!” He replies cheerfully. The beeping still blares obnoxiously as the vampires conspicuously exit the store premises, leaving behind a handful of scrambling employees. As soon as they’re out of sight, Shilo grabs the Sephora bag from Arthur, prompting Void to leap out and slink up her owner’s arm until she rests back on his shoulders. 

“I suspect we do not have the time to return to the hotel before the date, now,” Shilo figures. “Arthur, is there a bathroom in this mal?” Arthur glances around for a few seconds, then spots a bathroom sign up ahead. He points it out, and in an instant, Shilo has his brother’s wrist in hand and is sprinting as fast as his little legs can take him. 

⋆⋆⋆

Shilo pulls his brother through the bathroom door, yanking him forward with a stumble as he barely finds his own footing and settles against the sink counter. 

“Hey! Careful!” Emizel yelps, his wrist constrained by a surprisingly tight grip. He narrowly avoids slipping with his socked foot and falling directly on his ass only by virtue of spinning and falling onto Shilo instead. Shilo lets out a noise of surprise and pushes him backwards, giving Emizel a moment to stabilise. He tosses his Hot Topic tote bag on the floor. 

“Jesus. They should really tell you when the floor is wet in here,” Emizel scoffs as he kicks away the plastic yellow sign blocking his way to the sink. 

Shilo brushes himself off as best as he can, readjusting his cape and pushing back the loose locks of hair from his forehead. Emizel takes a moment to look at himself in the mirror, also sweeping his bangs back in a futile attempt to mimic his brother’s neatness and ending up looking far worse than he did a second ago. He makes a sour face and huffs in frustration. He glances over to his reflection’s left, where Shilo should be, and is shocked to see nothing but the bathroom stalls reflected back at him. 

“Shi-?” He starts, cutting himself off as he whips his head around to where Shilo should be standing, and is very much standing, looking at him with slight confusion as he pulls out the various products from his little striped bag and sets them on the counter in front of him. 

“Yes, Emizel?” Shilo asks, picking up a tube of grayish concealer and a large brush from the menagerie and rolling them over in his fingers unconsciously. “Really, I think it would be best if you were to wash your face first.” 

“Ah. Yeah. Alright.” Emizel agrees, shucking off his oversized Demons jacket on the counter next to him. He turns on the cold water and begins splashing his face.

“You didn’t tell me you didn’t, uh, have a reflection,” He notes mid splash, words slightly garbled through the water. Shilo looks surprised at this.

“Hm. I guess I didn’t. I assumed, since, you know, it is such a common trait among vampires, it was not worth the mention,” He reasons. Emizel shrugs as he shuts the tap off.

“Maybe. But I haven’t met a lot of vampires,” He says, wiping the excess water with his forearm and shaking his hair around like a dog to dry off. Unsurprisingly, his hair looks better like this. Shilo flinches at the droplets that fly his way and flicks off the one that lands on his cheek. “Sorry.”

Shilo hums. “Don’t worry about it. There are more pressing issues at hand.” He starts to twist open the concealer, then pauses with a frown. “Such as how there is nowhere for you to sit.” 

“Sure there is,” Emizel replies, hoisting himself up with his arms and hopping up onto the counter with his back to the mirror. Shilo gasps.

“Emizel!” He exclaims. “It’s all wet!” 

“I’m gonna be changing anyways, it’s fine.” He drags out the last word. 

Shilo purses his lips. “Well, you are lucky I wore my heels today,” he says, moving to be in front of his brother and punctuating his steps with a particularly loud click as if to emphasize his point. Emizel grins, looking down at him only slightly.

“You wear your heels every day, man. I don’t think you even can wear anything else at this point. You probably got, like, Barbie doll feet by now.” Shilo looks at him curiously.

“Who is this ‘Barbie doll’?” He asks, finally twisting open the tube and beginning to pat little gray dots onto Emizel’s face. Emizel instinctively shuts his eyes tight as the applicator comes close, earning a disapproving tut tut from his brother.

“I’ve got a lot of movies I need to show you after this,” Emizel responds. Rather mysteriously, Shilo thinks. Regardless, he is quick to get to work covering up discolourations and blemishes, laughing as he shoos away Emizel’s hands when he reacts to the brush on his skin.

“Emizel, I can’t work when you are grabbing at me!” Shilo giggles, gently smacking at the hand attempting to restrain his wrist. Emizel pulls back, embarrassed.

“Sorry, man! Instinct, or something. I don’t know.” 

“What, you think I am… attacking you?” Shilo asks, barely holding back another laugh. 

Emizel furrows his brows. “No! Shut up, dude! Shut up!” 

Shilo pushes onwards, eventually calming down from his giggle fit as Emizel warms up to the strange and unfamiliar sensations attacking him from all fronts. He pauses once he’s done with each product, giving Emizel the chance to peer at his reflection in the mirror behind him as Shilo fetches the next items. The process is more intuitive than Shilo had anticipated; he is eternally relieved for that. Emizel also appears to be fascinated with each step, taking in every change of his reflection. Shilo, oddly, feels a small pang of jealousy each time his brother turns to examine his appearance. 

When it reaches the time for eyeshadow, Shilo lets his brother pick out the palette. He chooses just black, at first, but is more than happy to let Shilo try his suggestion of layering a bold currant colour on beforehand. Emizel flinches again as the small brush comes close, smartly choosing to adhere to Shilo’s second suggestion of perhaps closing his eyes for this step, even if it means he can’t see how he looks. He nearly reacts a third time when he hears, just outside of the bathroom, a familiar British voice not-so-quietly request someone to use the ladies’ room for the time being.

A funny feeling of bewilderment strikes Shilo as he works away, pausing for a second with the thought that settles in his head. Emizel sneaks open an eye.

“Something wrong?” He asks, an unreadable expression falling over Shilo’s face. Shilo shakes his head, gesturing for Emizel to close his eye again.

“No, no! It is just funny how much easier this is when I can see what I am doing. No wonder Grefgor learned so quickly. It must have been like walking in the park.” Emizel hums in response, then actually processes what he just heard. 

“Wait, you’re telling me you’ve just been doing this shit blind for years?”

Shilo looks sheepish. “...Yes?”

Emizel’s mouth hangs slightly open, his mind mulling over all the stupidly complicated looks he’d seen his brother wear in just the short time he’s known him, and then his own pitiful attempt at doing guyliner a few years back: leaning over a dingy bathroom sink with his face so close to the mirror his nose practically pressed up against the glass and promptly poking himself in the eye with his black Crayola pencil at least a dozen times. “No, no, nothing. Fuckin’ wizard. Nothing. Whatever.” 

Shilo snorts, somehow still daintily. “I could teach you too, if that would be something you’d like to do. Grefgor could help as well.” A pause. “Maybe when we are in less of a time crunch, though.”

Something pulls at Emizel’s chest at the thought. “That could be fun, yeah.” 

Is this brotherhood? 

Emizel feels four fingers lightly smack his cheek twice, signalling he can open his eyes. Before he turns around to check his work, he sees Shilo smile — a little toothily, he notes. The tiniest hint of his fangs poke out from under his lip. It makes him look younger, somehow, likening his excited grin to a little kid playing dress up for the first time. Which, if Emizel thinks about it, is exactly what he is. He resists the urge to ruffle his hair.

Maybe it is.

“Now, all we have left is the eyeliner. Your eyeshadow is already pretty dark, but it’ll help accentuate it a little more. Make it look complete,” Shilo says as Emizel peers at his reflection. “Actually… you seem to be pretty sensitive with things near your eyes. Would you like to do this part yourself, Emizel?”

Emizel makes a face, suddenly blasted back to that lame memory. “No, no, no, that’s not a good idea. I’ll keep my eyes so open, don’t even worry about it.” 

“Are you sure?” Shilo asks, almost sing-songy and absolutely trying to goad his brother into trying it out. Emizel sees right through his fiendish tricks.

“Okay, maybe I'll do it for like, a second. But if I mess it up and we don’t have time to fi-”

“If you mess up, it will be hidden by your eyeshadow,” Shilo interjects sweetly. “Speaking of time, while you do that, I will take all these pesky tags off the clothes in our other bag. That way, they will be all ready for you when you’re done.”

“You just think of everything, don’t you?”

“Of course! In fact, I had Grefgor snag me these from the vampire Sephora!” Shilo clicks a pair of mini nail scissors together. “The store, not the, ah, person.”

When he reaches for the eyeliner, Shilo suddenly notices an unfortunately familiar small, wine coloured tube of lip gloss among the other products, evidently having been snuck into the bag upon purchase. 

“Emizel!” He chastises with no real malice. “Did you sneak V… Vampire Sex Blast in here?” His hesitation before saying the product name is palpable. Emizerl instantly bursts out laughing.

“What?! No!? Oh my god, dude!” He snickers. “Is it actually there?” Shilo picks it up hesitantly, slowly lifting it from the counter to show his brother, who laughs even harder upon recognition, throwing his head back and smacking it against the bathroom mirror. He reels forward, still laughing, as Shilo also fights back a smile.

“If you wanted it so bad, Emizel, you could have just said!”

“It wasn’t me, man! I’m telling you!” 

Shilo hands him the eyeliner, a thin black pencil with a rounded tip, and gets to work with his scissors, dutifully snipping off tags. Emizel braces himself for his ultimate test, silently pumping himself up as he leans in way too close to the mirror again. He tries to readjust his wrist on the counter, then slips on the excess water from his prior splashing. He brushes the water off and tries again. 

With an unsteady hand, he wets the tip of the pencil and presses it to the edge of his eyelid, drawing an equally wiggly line around his eye. He curses, trying to wipe off the product and only succeeding in smudging it further. Emizel almost goes for a paper towel, but stops when he notices that the smudging actually has improved the look. Cautiously, he replicates it as best as he can on the other eye, sweating up a storm with his attempt at precision. Shilo, meanwhile, hums a simple tune and bounces jovially as he snips and tosses tags into the trash bin. With a little more working up, Emizel goes for his waterlines next, mentally punching himself every time he feels the inclination to cringe.

By the time he’s finished, Shilo has too, and he quickly ushers his brother into a bathroom stall, tote bag of clothes in hand. Another round of raucous tripping and cursing later, Emizel emerges one last time, finally ready — minus his jacket, which Shilo playfully drapes across his shoulders. He steps back, letting Emizel approach the mirror once more to inspect his appearance. 

Stepping on the nominally drier floor, Emizel almost doesn’t recognize himself. He looks clean, almost put-together, and completely different from how he did at the start of the night. Taking it all in, he thinks the makeup is mostly responsible for this; The intense, smokey colour around his eyes isn’t something he’s used to seeing on himself — rather, it’s much more emblematic of Shilo’s appearance. Emizel adjusts one of his lip piercings in the mirror. If it weren’t for those, and perhaps the shaggy mess of hair on his head, he thinks maybe he could pass as him. 

Enthralled by his new look, and definitely assisted by his brother’s absence of a reflection, Emizel doesn’t notice the hand threatening to ruffle his hair until it’s far, far too late for him to plan and execute a counterattack. He yells cartoonishly as Shilo shakes him around in excitement.

“Hey!” He exclaims, wrestling Shilo’s hand off his head. Shilo just laughs, stepping backwards again.

“Just helping you complete your ‘casual’ look! You talk all this talk of being informal, yet I have yet to see you loosen up about this date!” Emizel smiles, consciously relaxing his shoulders. He slips his jacket on properly, making sure to adjust it first to make his brother proud, and takes a step back himself. 

“Yeah, man. You’re right. You’re right. Fuck.” Emizel wastes no time wrapping his twin brother in a tight hug, effectively surprising him back. “Thank you, Shilo. You’re a good brother.”

He can practically feel the light radiating from Shilo’s smile as he hugs him back. After one last squeeze, Emizel draws away with a matching one. 

“You can thank me again when you get back. Now, go have fun! Quickly! We must be nearly out of time!” Shilo pushes his brother towards the door with mirth. 

“Shit!” Emizel exclaims, hopping into a sprint as he dashes out, passing by a blasé Arthur and Void, an eagerly waving Grefgor, and one very long line to the men’s bathroom. 

⋆⋆⋆

Emizel kicks up dust as he halts his sprint as quickly as he started it, recognizing the surrounding streets and tall buildings that populate every corner he sweeps past. He has no idea what time it is; he left his flip phone in his other pants, tossed haphazardly into the bedazzled tote bag on the bathroom floor. 

It doesn’t seem to matter, though. When he rounds another corner, just a block away from his precious shitty alley, he doesn’t see any sign of Theo anywhere. Great! He’s not late. Walking at a brisk pace now, Emizel can feel his nerves start to bubble back up through his body, giving him shivers despite his hellishly warm jacket. He takes his hands out of his pockets to shake them around, echoing his brother’s words in his mind: Loosen up!

Man. How is Shilo the one telling him to loosen up? Why is he so nervous, anyways? It’s casual. It doesn’t mean anything! Well. Maybe there’s his problem. Maybe he wants it to mean something. 

A familiar street light bathes him in vivid red light as he finally approaches the alley. Emizel had never thought about it before, but in retrospect, it did make sense why a city run by vampires would want to install bat-friendly lighting on its streets. He’d never stopped to think about the bats the hundreds of times he hung out here with Theo, though. Rather, in his selfish mind, the crimson wash had only been there to make their little hideaway just that much more magical. 

Emizel feels that magic start to thrum though his chest again when he sees a silhouette, running just as he had been mere minutes ago, come into view at the end of the street. Fully immersed in the vibrant red that Emizel had come to associate with him and panting heavily, Theo sprints towards him with a loose wave, gesturing wildly above his head. Once his best friend’s face surfaces from the ocean of scarlet surrounding it, Emizel feels all of his nerves suddenly melt away.

“Theo!” He calls out, picking up his own pace to meet him halfway and spare him the extra breath. 

“Emizel!” Theo calls back breathlessly, squeezing his eyes shut as he meets him in a hug and nearly spins him around while he’s at it. 

“I’m so sorry I’m late dude, you must’ve been waiting out here for hou…” Theo trails off as he pulls back, suddenly speechless as he takes in Emizel’s face up close. Emizel is at a loss for words, too — too stunned to even process what was said to him when he sees Theo. 

Through the red hue cast over him, Emizel can make out the smallest hint of a darker colour in the outer corners of Theo’s eyes, intensifying his already warm gaze and making it so damn hard for Emizel to tear his away from him. His hair is freshly dyed and near blinding, bangs no longer neat — if they ever were — but still falling over his forehead and framing his face wonderfully. His numerous facial piercings glitter and gleam in the light. Emizel’s mouth falls slightly open as he lingers a little too long at the ones near Theo’s lips. 

“Dude. You look so fucking hot,” Theo says, his breath suddenly escaping him again. Emizel blinks at him dumbly. What had he been worried about, exactly?

“You do too. Fuck. I could kiss you right now,” Emizel replies, words tumbling out of his mouth before he can stop them. Shit! Theo’s eyes widen slightly — almost scared — before a big smile breaks out from his lips. 

“I guess we both had a bit of a makeover today, huh?” He asks, pulling back slightly to give Emizel a gentle elbow. Emizel grins back at him, sharp teeth on full display.

“I’ve got some crazy shit to tell you about tonight, man,” He admits. Theo draws back from their embrace fully, situating himself comfortably at Emizel’s side. 

“You can tell me all about it on the walk there, then,” He says, his voice soft and gaze pointedly drifting down at Emizel’s hand as he laces their fingers together. 

⋆⋆⋆

Shilo hands Arthur the Sephora bag, watching the older vampire curiously as he seems to scan its contents before taking it back. As he turns around to leave the mall, Shilo sees out of the corner of his eye Arthur reach into the bag and stash an all-too-familiar wine coloured lip gloss into his pocket and smile before letting Void hop on board. She shuts her eyes with a contented purr. 

Well, he thinks as he leans into Grefgor’s shoulder. It seems everyone got what they wanted tonight. 

[bikinikillarchives]

Kathleen Hanna featured on the track "Heartbeat" on Mike Watt's 1995 debut album, “Ball-Hog or Tugboat?". Starts at 2:19.

"Hello! Mr. Watt. This is Kathleen Hanna returning your phone call, 'bout 3:45, on Monday, and it's about that fuckin' record that you asked me to do something for. And I guess I'm responding to that now 'cuz I have a few minutes and I just wanted to tell you...uh, I have a friend who was raped by, fucked by, whatever you fuckin' wanna call it by a guy on your record, gonna be on your record; he's a big rockstar! Yeah, when he was 27 and she was 13 he was a big rockstar too. And uh, I don't know if the phrase, "power imbalance" means anything to you. But uh, I'm just not so sure I wanna be included in your little white rock boy fuckin' hall of shame here, you know? And I'm just like, "do I wanna be sandwiched in between some of these guys that are just doing the whole, like, big-white-baby-with-an-ego-problem thing?" I mean, [sigh] get over it! It's so boring. It's like, a lot of these guys should just fuckin' quit music and become lifeguards at like Wild Waves or some shit, so they can just like get their fucking, you know, anger management thing going, they can just get their power trips out on the kids, they can just do the whole thing. Maybe they'd be actually saving someone's life; "hey! Don't run by the pool. No cutoffs." You know? That's what I hear when I hear some of this, you know, music by a lot of these fuckin' guys, you know? And I mean, I guess what I'm saying is, "I'm just too cool. To be on your fuckin' record." You know? It's like, I really don't wanna perpetuate or be included in a thing where it's just a bunch of like, I don't know, just like this new- the music coming out by guys right now in the sort of like rock world or alternative rock world or used-to-be-punk world or whatever. It's like the whole, "I'm a straight, white, middle class, male, rockstar guy, but I'm so fuckin' oppressed. I'm a loser baby why don't you kill me." [Sigh] Yawn. Like super fuckin' yawn. So yeah, I guess what I'm saying is: No. No. No. No, I'm not interested. No, I don't wanna be on your fuckin' record. No. But, um. Mr. Watt. Dude. Babe. Sir. Uh, you need to get me my fuckin' Annie soundtrack back like soon 'cuz you've had it forever and I know you haven't even fuckin' listened to it yet. So just like, gimme a call and tell me when that's going to happen. And, um. I'll talk to you then. Bye."

info from Addict.com under cut.

ATN: How about "Heartbeat" [the answering-machine message from Hanna on Mike Watt's 1995 album, Ball-Hog Or Tugboat?, during which Hanna says she's declining to appear on the record because an alleged rapist is also on it]?

KH: Yeah, that's different.

ATN: Now he called you up and asked you to do the actual song that your message is tacked onto?

KH: He didn't ask me to do a song. He didn't even ask me to do anything. I forced my way onto that record. OK, I'm going to tell you the truth. You caught me in an honest mood, 'cause usually I lie. That's really bad. I'm probably going to hang up the phone and have a total seizure, a panic attack. I'll be going, "Oh my God, I told the truth to someone." I met Mike Watt, I don't even remember where. And he was telling me about his album. And I said, "It sounds like there's only one woman on this whole record, and there's, like, 300 guys." I was like, "What's the problem?" And he was like, "Do you wanna do it?" He didn't even know me. I don't even know if he knew I was in a band. And I said, "Yeah." Then I walked away, and I was visiting New York City and staying in a friend's apartment. I just spent an hour thinking about what I would want to do. The whole idea was that I didn't want to be on the record, and I kind-of said I wanted to be on the record to be annoying. And then I was like, "Uh-oh, I kind-of said I would do this." I don't think he gave a shit whether I did it or not. He just was like, "Whatever, you can do it." He's a pretty nice guy, a pretty funny guy, a pretty smart guy. Then I was like, what do I wanna do? And I was like, Oh my God, do I really want to be on a record with fuckin' Henry Rollins at this stage of the game? I mean, I love Black Flag, but c'mon. And I was like, this is really weird company to be keeping. I was like, "I don't want be on it, but I do want to be on it," so I decided to record that ambivalence. The way I figured I could do that was to record me rejecting being on the record. So it's this whole thing of recording my absence. Or recording the absence of resistance. That was my idea, to have a record of absence on the record. It also made it an interesting thing because of the idea of authorship and ownership. People didn't know if I really had left that message on the machine, and then he just put it on without my permission. Or if I left the message on his machine hoping it would go on. The thing is, there was no machine, it was just a recording. He never really had my Annie record. I made that whole thing up, I barely even know him. It's just art.

ATN: It's perfect. It's almost Andy Kaufman-like. I have written down here to ask you if Watt asked for your permission.

KH: Yeah, he did. It was a specific art piece, and I can say it now because everyone's forgotten about it. Actually my friend from junior high heard it on the radio. I was like, "Oh my god." She's like, "You sound like such a freak, what's wrong with you?"

from Mike in 2020: "This song [Heartbeat] was going to be an instrumental. But it was like 45 guys on the record and I thought, “man, I gotta have more women on this”. So I got Carla. Petra and her sisters did some singing, played some violin… I asked Tifanny, a friend of J. Mascis, if she would sing. Actually, this song is made up of a Dos song, and a song I’ve written for the Minutemen, I put them up together. Anyway, the one person who asked to be part of this project was Kathleen Hanna. So, on this song, Tifanny sings the words that I wrote, and the words that Kathleen Hanna, I guess, recited, those are her words. I was in New York City, and I was already down with the studio. Thurston was with us. And he said: “You know what, we can use my answering machine, from the studio”. So, he had Kathleen call him up and leave the message you can hear in the song. So, that’s the recording. It’s not a real message, she makes up this… Some of that stuff is very real, but some of that is made up, for sure. That’s the way Kathleen is, she mixes up things together, but the impression you get by listening to that, is like she doesn’t want to be on the record. But that’s the complete opposite of the reality, she wanted to be on the record, she asked me to. But that’s what you can do with records, you can mess up with reality. I have been asked a lot about that. That’s the story. Kathleen wanted to be on the record, she was. You know, her husband’s on there. Ad-Rock. They’ve been married 26 years, she told me that I had something to do with it. But come on, I was just trying to make a record. The same thing happened to Nels Cline and Yuka Honda. I made a record, you know, usually when I make projects, people don’t marry each other, but sometimes it happens. (laughs)"

[soaps-mohawk]

I have a theory I need to share with someone.

You're my someone 🖤 yw 😂

But ok, ok. It's all game related btw!

I'm thinking about Ghost in the scene where Rudy is driving them all through Las Almas. If we're following 09 Ghost's past, it would make sense as to why he's so out of it and in nearly an entirely different world while they drive, because he's probably stuck in a panic from the whole Roba events.

Mans is probably freakin tf out. Like shit, shit, shit. In Mexico. Of all the fuckin places to be. It had to be Mexico.

But idk, bc mans was also a bit too calm at being back in Mexico. Like, I get he's a soldier and is forced to compartmentalize.. but I feel like somethings would slip through, even while on a mission there.

Which, I guess it would slightly make sense why he waited for Soap in Alone. Because he wouldn't let someone under his command be made into a cartel Twinkie. (It's just an analogy, idk why I went with Twinkie.)

Idk, maybe '22 Ghost doesn't have the same background as OG Ghost?

But then, Alejandro telling him not to get lost (took me a year to realize why he said this.), is because Ghost has been so used to working alone. Like he's basically telling mans you have people you can trust, don't lose sight of that.

And idk, that's just really beautiful.

Anyways. That's my theory, kind of. Not really. 😂

I'm always down to listen to theories lol

I've seen people mention '09 Ghost's past and that's why he was super dissociated in that scene, but I've also seen the opposite and people don't think '22 Ghost has the same back story. I know us fic writers give reboot Ghost '09 Ghost's backstory (mostly because reboot Ghost has no backstory at this point and sometimes it's easier to use one that already exists instead of coming up with an entirely new one) but I'm kind of on the side of him being a completely different character that might share some similarities with '09 Ghost. I know the others have had little nods to the OG characters in their backstories, but I am inclined to think reboot Ghost has an entirely new story.

(Would be nice to know what it is, but I know he's Mr. Anonymous Mystery Man)

I do like the idea of him being so protective of Johnny because he's afraid of something horrible happening to him because of his past. He didn't have to wait for him, but he did and he was so worried about Johnny.

I just think they're all beautiful, but that's just me 🤭

I think that's why I've come to love the reboots more than the OGs. I still like the OGs don't get me wrong, but there's just so much more development in the reboots with both the characters and the plots. They're not just some military dudes trying to stop WW3 and shoot a bunch of people. They have history and backstories and such intricate relationships and there's so many little things thrown in there that just really make you care about them beyond them being the "good guys."

[wonderlandleighleigh]

So its early but I'm on Tumblr, and like.

You know. Saw a post. Like you do.

And it's about appropriating Jewish mythology and symbols and terms. And there is so much "DON'T DO THAT" in the post.

But I think the post gets it a lil wrong. What we're really looking for is respect. Respect our things. Our culture. Or symbols. They're not Happy Meal toys. Make some effort.

I saw a lot of comments on the post saying that people had never met a Jewish person, and that we are "professional victims."

Well hello. I'm a Jewish person, and we've been run out of more countries than you've had hot dinners, so we're more like professionals at getting the fuck out of places where people want us dead.

Let's do an edit!

Golems: if you're going to use them in your fantasy, please treat them with respect. They're a mythological creature borne out of the desperation of a people constantly on the run from assholes trying to burn down their lives, and thought of as protective. Don't use them as a weird monster. It's easy to find the lore. Read up.

Kabbalah: is so much stranger than you know, and worth doing research on. Please be respectful if you intend to use it in a story, or even try to practice it.

If it's Hebrew and it doesn't have anything to do with Judaism...man that is a weird one. Cuz it's our religious language but also people who aren't Jewish live in Israel and speak Hebrew but this one feels funny.

The Star of David: it's not a pentagram. It's not a generic symbol. It's pretty specifically Jewish. Sometimes it gets worn by people who want us dead? Uncomfortable.

Goy: isn't considered polite but is more polite than "fuckin goy" which I sometimes use when some goy is being a terrible asshole.

Lenny Bruce had a whole bit on this one:

Gentile: less rude. You non jews are just gentiles.

Antisemitism: that funny feeling in your bones when you know someone either doesn't like you because you are Jewish (those fuckers who wear the "6 million was not enough" shirts. IE; Hitler shoulda kilt more Jews), or when someone says shit like "you guys control the banks so I bet you'll get all 7 days of Passover off soon enough." We don't control the banks. I fucking promise. We don't control shit. Whatever power white Jewish people might have is allowed by the white gentile power structure and can be easily taken away.

When the big orange goy was president, and employed Steven Miller (Jewish. A piece of shit) I used to tell people that "we'll all wind up in the same train car anyway. He's no safer from the hate than the rest of us." I'm still right.

The word Jew: context matters. "The Jews" is an easy shorthand. The Jewish People takes longer to say. One time in a bar, in Mississippi, the director of another department from work pointed at me and yelled "JEW!!!" and that felt.

Bad.

It felt bad you guys.

1. Being singled out for what you are feels bad.

2. Mississippi feels like a place you don't want to be singled out for being Jewish.

3. "Jew" often gets bent into "jewy" which is derogatory. Women were sometimes called "jewesses" which was a little like being called a witch they wanted to burn at the stake.

Probably safe bet to just say Jewish People.

We've been around a long time, but there aren't a whole of us left. But we also come in all different types. A bunch of us are white, but some of us are Black or Latinx or Asian or Middle Eastern. We don't agree on any one way of doing things and we have a lot of opinions and sometimes some dude wanders around The Rockaways in New York with a machete looking for the closest synagogue because Kanye told him we're all evil.

We are constantly on the lookout for people who don't like us because WE KEEP FINDING THEM. Like sometimes you think somebody's cool, but it turns out they think we have horns and eat white Christian baby blood.

For the record, white Christians don't season their food, so that shit is too bland. Not enough dill. We'll pass.

But yeah. Just some thoughts on my culture. Thanks for reading.

[junii-moony]

story time:

So a few days ago, in the middle of the night, I saw a massive fucking spider crawling across my floor in the darkness. This dude was fast as fuck for his size and it scared the everloving shit outta me because I hate spiders and even more so hated the idea that this fucker was just in my room for like the last two weeks while I slept.

So anyways, he’s chilling in a corner and I’m fucking freaking out because it’s 3am and I don’t know what to do without making a bunch of noise. Don’t have spider killer in my room, nor can I use a vacuum and suck em up (just squishing him with a paper towel was out of the question, dude was too big and too fast for me to consider that).

So in my endless knowledge, I went “Hey, y’know what could work? Axe fucking body spray. Because that shit’s basically toxic to humans, so it can probably kill a spider.” and who would have guessed it, that shit wasn’t true at all. Bro retreated after a couple sprays, and left me with an overwhelming sense of dread and a room smelling like fuckin’ “Cool Sport Rush” or whatever the fuck the scent was.

So after staying up for an extra hour on recon, I figured bro just fucked off and wouldn’t come back, so I reluctantly fell asleep and woke up the next morning with no sight of em. Whole day passed, no sight of em. Most of the night passed, no sight of em. Once again I was awake at 3am playing Star Rail like a troglodyte.

Until this fucker made his last mistake. I saw him out of the corner of my eye, crawlin’ around like a bitch, but instead of panicking, I had a plan this time. I instantly grabbed my fuckin’ Trailblazer bat (that I made for a cosplay a while back) and was able to just barely smush him against the wall before he escaped again. There was a little bit of overkill involving squishing him against the floor with the head of the bat for like a minute, but it worked, and I came out the final victor. I picked his corpse from the floor with a paper towel, and flush em down the toilet because of paranoia.

Moral of the story: Don’t fuck with me if you’re a spider, it is on sight.

[many-gay-magpies]

HELLO CAN I HEAR MORE OF THE WOLF GIRL MURDER CRYPTID???

She sounds so. So. I beg yuo………..

YES YES OH MY GOD ABSOLUTELY

dude you do not even know I have been trembling like an anxious chihuahua just waiting to be able to go full feral about her to someone. this rocks

OKAY SO. the entire story kind of started because i was listening to a song and i was like you know what this would be great for? being the backing track to a cold open where some girl is running through the woods mid-panic attack after having just killed someone. then it kind of grew a plot from there.

(me, foolishly: oh this will probably not take too long or take up too much space. clearly i forgot just how Able i am to ramble when prompted. put the rest under a cut bc it got LONG)

the cryptid wolf girl herself is named rosalind, or roz for short, or possibly rory for short once she figures out some gender stuff later on... the Central Relationship in the story is between her and her little sister anna. they did... NOT have a great life growing up—dad was an abusive alcoholic, mom was a DEPRESSIVE alcoholic and even when they split up, mom kinda left roz to raise/take care of anna completely on her own... things are better now; mom has cleaned herself up and is trying to be better—but like. that messed roz up lmao. go figure.

so for their whole lives growing up, roz and anna were kind of glued together... ROZ was more of a parent to anna than their own mom, and anna went to her for everything. but in the time of the story, anna's started to Grow Up and Grow OUT of needing her big sister for everything, AND ON TOP OF THAT she's just got herself a boyfriend who fucking sucks and reminds roz WAY too much of their dad... (in my mind I feel like when their parents split and dad left, roz was old enough to actually understand how abusive and shitty he was, but to anna it just seemed like he'd abandoned him, so she's probably a bit stupid about relationships because she's searching for the love she never got from her father/searching for a bandaid to the feeling of abandonment she has from him, but she isn't exactly the healthiest about that and latches onto the first guy that shows her attention, thinking it's Love.)

anyways, this whole deal—anna getting distant, anna being stupid about her bf—makes roz feel Some Type Of Way. she's kind of latched onto her position as anna's pseudo-parent as the crux of her self-worth, so now that anna seems to not NEED her anymore she does not take it well. she wants to protect anna from her toxic bf and from HERSELF, but she can't do a thing and just feels useless because everything she TRIES just ends up pushing anna further away from her. then on her birthday, when she's at her friend's house to celebrate (the best friend she's gay af for, zoe), she makes a wish to be able to protect anna like she used to—aaand the literal moon overhears and basically goes "you have a noble desire, i'll give you my blessing" and turns her into a werewolf (sort of - it's not a whole "turn every full moon" deal, just whenever there's a specific trigger)

anyway like a week after roz's bday when she makes the wish, it's homecoming, and her mom (who is also stupid and just thinks roz hates mark (anna's bf) because she's jealous) has asked her to drive anna to this party mark invited her to... which is in the middle of the woods. with a whole bunch of older high school guys. sure, mom, that's bound to be perfectly safe and legal.

roz has been feeling a little off all week and having weird dreams (unbeknownst to her thanks to her new lunar benefactor). after homecoming, she drives anna to her party... but there is NO FUCKIN WAY she trusts those dudes with her, so she sneaks up to spy on them from the bushes to make sure they're not getting up to any unsavory shit and hurting her little sister. (spoiler alert: they absolutely get up to tons of unsavory shit.) so roz is watching these guys, and it's literally all guys, like anna is the ONLY girl, and they're all older—and they're drinking alcohol, getting progressively more wasted, and anna is refusing but mark keeps pressuring her, and eventually he makes some vague allusions to ah... "loosening her up" with the alcohol so he can have his way with her, while touching her in not-so-great ways... and seeing that triggers roz's first transformation. she just full-on catapults in and tears him to SHREDS, literally. then someone stabs her with a beer bottle and she flees, turns back human, and starts freaking the fuck out because she just killed mark.

okay um. i did not intend to just tell you the entire story up to the point that ive written it. but OH WELL I DID! hope u enjoyed that lmao.

the whole premise of the story is that, despite how much it sucks at first, roz being a werewolf actually kind of brings her, her mom, and her sister closer together... the thing is, the moon, when it heard her wish, it didn't just give her what she asked for—it gave her what she NEEDED. and in general i have lots a feelings about werewolves as the representations of our deepest, most repressed emotions and desires, like if you've seen the whole thing about like "the werewolf is the part of you that LOVES YOU. it is the part of you that is mad at how wrongly you've been treated and wants to PROTECT you." yeah. and i have lots of feelings about the MOON and moon deities as gods of honesty, vulnerability, and seeing the truth of our deepest emotions...

so the wolf is kind of all roz's anger issues just smushed into one big wolfy body. a big theme ive started exploring with the story is that being a werewolf isn't exactly CHANGING roz or making her feel things she's never felt before (like, you know. the murder urges), it's just bringing things she ALWAYS FELT to the forefront and making them unignorable. because above all what roz NEEDS is something to force her to face herself to be able to overcome all the self-hatred she has (because BOY SHIT THERE'S A LOT OF IT). which is also where her relationship with zoe (who ive thought, written, and posted about almost more than the relationship between roz and anna... whoops) comes in.

roz and zoe are best friends. they have been since they were five years old, and zoe has been with roz through like ALLLLL the shit of her seventeen long years. roz is incredibly gay and absolutely in love with zoe, but doesn't realize because she's a fucking dumbass and thinks that's a normal way to feel about her best friend (or, like, maybe she kind of knows something's Different and knows what it IS, but she can't ever let herself realize it fully because ✨internalized homophobia✨).

when the whole wolf thing starts out, roz doesn't tell zoe what's happening, because she's afraid zoe will be afraid of or disgusted by this part of her... which she likes to think is the wolf's doing, but she knows it's really ALWAYS been a part of her. roz keeps the secret from zoe for a WHILE because of this, and keeps pushing her away, but zoe (who Knows roz and loves her back just as intensely) will NOT fucking let her. so there's gonna be like this whole stage of incredibly painful pining, where the moon goddess makes roz realize that she's in love with zoe, but she still hasn't even TOLD zoe about the whole werewolf thing, so there ensue events like: roz in wolf form subconsciously seeking out zoe, breaking out of her house in the middle of the night, going to stand below zoe's window, and then waking up in the morning thinking it was a dream until she sees her window is open and her pajamas are shredded to all hell and goes "shit".

eventually, of course, zoe DOES find out (either by accidentally witnessing a transformation one day or because roz finally caves and tells her, i havent decided yet), and spoiler alert, she isn't disgusted or afraid—she's actually, like, wildly attracted to the feral bloodthirsty vengeful side of roz, because that's the embodiment of roz's deepest, more true self, and zoe has wanted nothing more than to know roz completely—and of course it still takes roz a while to realize zoe's wide-eyed, drop-jawed stares at her are not FEAR but I'M SO GAY IM GONNA OASS OUT HOLY SHIT, because she's fucking stupid.

another honorable mention character: himbo soccer team boy tentatively named matt (gonna change either his or mark's name cuz they're too similar) who witnesses roz partially-transform by accident one day and decides he's going to be absolutely ride-or-die for this tormented lesbian werewolf. he's there for her until she finally gets her shit together and tells zoe what's going on, and long after that. they become a cute little bestie trio and matt ABSOLUTELY realizes how gay roz and zoe are for each other before roz does and he's like JESUS CHRIST JUST KISS ALREADY

(also. most worthy of mention in the yet-to-be-written zoe-and-roz scenes i feel feral about: there's gonna be one after zoe finds out where roz has a really bad transformation, and passes out still wolfed-out in zoe's lap... and she's visibly having a nightmare (plus she's still a wolf which means she's still in crisis mode even though she's sleeping), so zoe starts reading aloud to her while she sleeps until she calms down enough to turn back human... and it starts out as just zoe doing what she's ALWAYS done to comfort and soothe roz, but since roz is ASLEEP it devolves into zoe pouring out her true feelings without roz awake to hear them... then roz wakes up in the middle of zoe reciting shakespeare's sonnet 57 to her and it's like. INSANELY gay. and the whole time matt's off to the side like holy shit.)

ANYWAYS YEAH THAT WAS. A LOT HAHA. I hope u like my feral unhinged asshole werewolf girl :)