#An Arm and a Leg

[get-along-little-khornedoggie]

loyal @simplepotatofarmer reblogged my techno art!! a highest honor!!

all i have in return is an old doodle of their silly little guys starring in my favorite prison sitcom; i really need to make some new rivals art soon.

[mxmollusca]

My newest tentacle story is complete!

Stede swallowed a whine, clearly struggling to continue their improv. “Scales could be interesting—”

He was cut off by a sharp intake of breath as Ed spread his index and middle finger to slide along the underside of one of the largest cups, then massaged the pad of his thumb down into the center of it. “Crab claws could be cool,” he rumbled, feeling an aching warmth build in his pelvis.

Stede’s eyelids fluttered as his muscles contracted, composed facade slipping away. “Edward, would you still love me if I was a crab?”

“Oh, definitely,” Ed replied, voice cracking as he slid his other hand down beneath Stede. Another sucker quickly found his hand and they began their mutual exploration, Ed lightly dragging a thumbnail over the ridges of the cup before fluttering along the edge with his index finger. “You’re already a snippy bastard and it’s hot as fuck. Imagine the damage you could do with the added grip strength.”

***

Stede is cursed to grow tentacles whenever he gets wet, and Ed is a huge, horny nerd about it. The story answers the question: "What if a body that changes is fine, actually?"

This is a sequel but can be read as a stand-alone piece.

[ninjaneonleon]

Honestly, Leo was in awe of all the other versions of his family scattered around the large arena. He was pretty sure he’d seen some of them that looked human—he wasn’t sure how that was a thing—he’d seen a few that looked to be different species of turtle, and somewhere across the arena he had seen a version of himself covered in bandages with a dead look in his eye. That guy scared him. He hoped they didn’t come face to face. Even so, this whole competition was so cool!

Donnie had ridden his robot horse in the last heat, and of course it had exploded right at the finish line. The Leo he’d been riding against apparently had fallen off just before the finish line, meaning the two turtles crossed the line together without their horses. Leo had suspected the other Leo had been a little ahead of his Donnie but it was decided to be a tie. He wasn’t sure what that would mean for his team but Leo was more than happy to keep mingling while he waited to find out.

He spotted the duo watching the heat from the other stand. An older Leo and an older Mikey. They weren’t the only two older versions around but for some reason, they stood out to Leo. Maybe because they had been cheering on their little Leo with so much enthusiasm.

Being the analyst he was, Leo decided to see what he could figure out about them. First thing to note: malnutrition. They hadn’t been eating well for a long while. It made them seem older than they first appeared, especially the older Mikey with his white tufts of hair sticking out a little crazily out the side of this head. Without the malnutrition factors, Leo would place them to be in their fourties.

Big Leo kept glancing around and Big Mikey was tense, his hands twitching and his body ready. Huh. Anxiety maybe? Or wait, no, PTSD of some description. They were used to being in high-stress environments and this inter dimensional silliness was setting them on edge.

That trauma idea was further backed up when Leo realized that Big Leo had a stump for an arm and that one of Big Mikey’s legs was a prosthetic. It was weird though. Leo hadn’t been able to tell it was fake.

Wait, he just saw the toes on the prosthetic wiggle when Big Mikey stretched.

No. Way.

Leo’s body reacted before he realized what he was doing. He zapped closer to the duo, waving his arms to get their attention so he didn’t spook them. “Hey! Hi! Can I talk to you guys for a sec?”

Big Leo blinked then shrugged, hopping easily down from the stands. Big Mikey just floated down easily. Leo knew that his Mikey would manage to get that kinda thing, being able to float, under control eventually.

“Hey, uh, Leo? How can we help?” Big Leo asked.

“Hi! I think your team is against my team,” Leo started, flapping his hands to try and keep his energy in check. “I just have a weird question. Can I see your prosthetic?” He looked at Big Mikey, eyes wide and excited.

The box turtle looked stunned for a second before shifting and showing off the metal leg. It seemed to be connected directly to the stump somehow and Leo noted how the ankle joint definitely wouldn’t move like that without input. Oh Pizza Supreme, it was just as he thought!

“This is amazing! Is it controlled by your muscular structure or your nervous system? Is it heavy? It can clearly take some abuse. It’s been through a lot but it’s still running so smoothly. Oh, is it powered through kinetics or does it have an internal power system?”

Leo’s questions were cut off by a small snort. “Since when can any Leo speak technobabble?” Big Mikey joked. Then he took a breath. “Let’s start at the beginning. I’m Angelo, he’s Leon. We’re from a Kraang timeline. That’s how we lost our limbs.”

“What’s a Kraang?” Leo asked with a frown. He didn’t miss how the older turtles’ eyes widened but that wasn’t important right now. “Tell me later. I just need to know how you guys did it! That level of integration with your prosthesis isn’t going to be viable for decades! Maybe even a century! It’s so smooth and behaving like a normal limb.”

“Well, our Donnie—”

“Oh, shoot, right. Hold that thought.” Leo turned and picked out where his Donnie, covered with soot and somewhat bruised, was standing. “Fizzy!” Leo called before zapping over, grabbing Donnie, and zapping back. “Sorry, I know my twin will want to hear this too. Please continue.”

“Nardo, what are you doing? I was waiting for the resul— Oh. Is that—”

“A fully integrated prosthesis with a full range of natural motion, seemingly controlled by a nervous system? Yes, I believe it is,” Leo said as cut Donnie off with a grin. “That’s why I brought you over here. Angelo and Leon were about to explain.”

“You have my interest. Please continue.” Donnie gestured to the two older turtles, leaning against Leo. There was a pause as Leon and Angleo studied him and his twin. Angleo opened his mouth to say something when a bell cut him off.

“Attention, please. All ties will now be resolved by the tied teams teaming up! The next round is karaoke so everyone rest your voices!”

“Guess that means we’re a team now.” Leon chuckled. “C’mon. Let me grab our Leo and his bros and you can grab your brothers, then we can all get some food while Angelo explains the prosthetic.”

Leo lit up. “Awesome! C’mon, Fizz, let’s go!”

———————

So this has my and @geniusbuilttm version of Leo and Donnie meeting @newellthedragon ‘s future Leo and mikey. Go check out her stuff, it’s super cool!

Vote for Surp-rise! And An Arm and a Leg in @tmntausummit !

[allthatlives]

[hinamie]

I'll rip in hands and teeth and take a bite

[nellpose]

:')

[wellfine]

Work to be done 🍳

[s-aint-elmo]

renowned glomper marcille donato

[thymechaos]

i just can't believe that oda fucking create sanji, a stereotypical ladies man who simps to an embarrassing degree for women while having his hackles comically raised around everyone he perceives as a man - and most notably butting heads with the more obvious ~manly man~ of the crew. haha, classic anime running gag, the kind that gets obnoxious at times but still makes you laugh.

AND THEN, like a billion chapters later, motherfucker steeples his fingers and goes "soooooooo... what makes a person Like That?"

and the answer is that he grew up in fucking Toxic Masculinity, The Kingdom. the answer is that he was always Different, in a way other guys instinctively perceived as weak, and that made him the target of visceral scorn and violence. the answer is that he was sensitive, sweet, caring, nurturing - feminine-coded traits which are only valued by patriarchy insofar that they're performed by women in service of men. the answer is that in a kingdom comprised almost entirely by violent men, the only ones who were ever kind to him, the only safety he ever had, were a girl and a woman.

so cooking is for women and servants, it makes you less of a man. only women will ever really value you for your passions and dreams. women are also actively hurt by the way the world works, they are unsafe unless they comply with men's violence, and you have to protect them.

(men will always know what you are, and they will hurt you if you let them.)

and even after he leaves... at baratie he is cherished and respected, but even that is an extremely masculine environment. we don't talk about our feelings, we don't let our guard down, the only love is tough love. when he tries to express his artistry and express himself through his cooking, rather than just filling orders and making money, he gets mocked.

so here is a man who will not raise a hand to a woman, because he rejects the masculinity he was raised with and refuses to become yet another man subjecting women to violence. he is desperate for women's attention and affection because it's SAFE, it's the only kind he can trust. other men are potential threats and must be treated as such. he must at all times be snarky, tough, Not Feminine, because to be perceived otherwise is to be powerless, to be hurt.

like y'all. the queer coding of it all? the overtly feminist themes? the active rejection of toxic masculinity and the way it's shown to be directly tied to imperialism? what the fuck.

[lotus-pear]

HAPPY 114‼️‼️ take these silly doodles i did

[mxmollusca]

I write things. Here are a few of them:

To-cat-ta and Fugue

Pairing: Blackbonnet

Rating: T

Summary: My piece for the A to Z of Ed Teach Zine, featuring the letter N for Ned, in which I predict Ed's catboy era before season two gifted us with the bell collar and onesie. Canon-divergent post season one, in a universe where Ed and Stede make it back to the Revenge and resume pirating.

***

Works for Spiders

Pairing: Blackbonnet

Rating: M

Summary: Innkeepers-era horror-comedy told from the POV of the house spider who lives in the inn. Think Charlotte's Web meets Home Alone.

***

Wave Hello to the Void

Pairing: Blackbonnet

Rating: E

Summary: Stede Bonnet is a former professor of folklore and aspiring YouTube personality trying to find the Mothman.

Edward Teach is an ex-astronomer just trying to find a way out of small-town West Virginia.

Little do they know that what they actually find will change them both forever.

Written in collaboration with @zacharybosch and @eefaevie!

***

The Scientific Findings of E. Teach, Stedeologist series:

An Arm and a Leg

The Sticking Place

Pairing: Blackbonnet

Rating: E

Summary: Stede is cursed to grow tentacles whenever he gets wet, and Ed is a huge, horny nerd about it. The story answers the question: "What if a body that changes is fine, actually?"

***

The Starry Eyes and Counting Down to Zero series:

In Favor With Their Stars

The Ship of Theseus

Pairing: Blackbonnet

Rating: M

Summary: Ed is an engineer aboard the Revenge, an interplanetary research vessel on a multi-year mission to study Jupiter's moon Europa. An accident requires that Ed awaken from cryostasis over six months early, and finds his only companion to be Stede, the ship's onboard AI. They develop an unconventional friendship, but is it possible to have more?

This is classic mutual pining with a sci-fi twist, inspired by all of my favorite stories about the nature of personhood.

Audio drama excerpts from In Favor with Their Stars, performed by @nordarknessdimsthesky

***

There's a Monster at the End of This Book

Pairing: Vianton

Rating: M

Summary: Musings on humanity, monstrosity, and buttons, or:

Anton self-actualizes, with a little help from a friend.

***

Choose Your Own Adventure: Reunion!

Pairing: Blackbonnet

Rating: E

Summary: A collaborative Choose Your Own Adventure story full of feelings, smut, a sprinkling of angst, a generous helping of nonsense, and a whole lot of amazing writing and art by 16 different writers and artists!

[dcxdpdabbles]

Danny: I was told to report to you

Alfred: Who told you that?

Danny: Didn't get his name, but it was a man with black hair, blue eyes, tall and sad?

Alfred: That's could be so many in this manor. Can you be more specific?

Danny: um, he was pretending to be stupid at last night gala?

Alfred: More specific

Danny: He yelled "Eat the rich" before nose diving into the glass tower.

Alfred: That's was Master Jason. Did he tell you why you needed to report to me?

Danny: He told me to give this to you when I found you *hands over folded paper*

Alfred reading: Dear Alfred, here is a boy who agreed to work part-time as a cook for the mannor while you recover from your broken arm and broken legs . Let me know if he becomes a problem. I'll kill him for you. Heart Jason

Danny: ....He was joking about the killing part right?

Alfred: No, he put a heart. He is rather serious.

Danny strain nervous smile: Oh

Alfred: Not that it matters. If you ARE a problem, I will put a bullet between your eyes before you can beg. Working legs or not. Now then, how about I show you the kitchen, yeah?

Danny: .....the pay is what again?

Alfred: Five hundred for each meal you prepare and an hourly salary of twenty-nine dollars for how long it takes you to cook.

Danny: Aight, I'm desperate enough. Lead the way sir.

Alfred studying him: You may survive the Waynes yet.

Danny: Wait. What does that mean?

Alfred: This way *rolling away in wheel chair*

Danny: SIR!? WHAT DOES THAT MEAN?

[zosanbrainrot]

clothes are not the only thing they swap

[belliesandmuscles]

[ghostiiest]

my favorite brothers ever

[satans-codpiece]

Decepticons leaning, because why not