#And and and plus all the time mike spent trying to reach out to ev after the bite only for ev to be so traumatized that he kept

[and-stir-the-stars]

Got the brainworms.

A Nest Torn Empty, the month Mike is away. There are some flavors of trauma that might interestingly suit that scenario. These are just little brainstorms, don't feel like. Compelled to use them lmao

One might fit the idea of being medicalized, poked and prodded. Psych test after psych test, evaluations and therapy as it was in the eighties, possibly by particularly shitty professionals who try to go the therapy version of "bad cop" and INSIST mike is lying just to see if he breaks?

Another might be someone deciding to enact some kind of revenge on Evan's behalf. This could go any number of ways, but I think it would be interesting if someone who has been in Evan's position before decided to try and create some version of "a taste of his own medicine" for Mike, though obviously without the near death bit bc of plotlines etc.

And then there are less obvious things that kind of get left out. Being torn from your family all of the sudden is traumatic. He doesn't know what's going to happen to him, or to his brother and sister. Whether or not he's in another abusive place, the sheer amount of differences could throw him off. All the rules are different, all the people are different. He probably feels very isolated.

(You're giving me ideas for the au where Mike thinks Evan died after they're split up, lmao)

In terms of reactions, I think there might be more of a shutdown than his earlier behavior. If nothing he's doing yields ANY reaction– good or bad– then why bother? I think a lot of it would just lead him to be very tired by the end of it all.

Final aspect that I think would be interesting: as the kids grow up and actually learn to talk about the shitty upbringing they had, I think Mike's month away might fall to the wayside for a while. Nobody else thinks about it; it doesn't come up.

Eventually, though, it does need to be addressed. Maybe it kind of pales in comparison to the bite itself, but the experience still hurt.

(Or disregard all of this! Just brainstorming dhfjdkdksk)

okay first off I think it's so funny that I have to outsource all my "how would Mike react to xyz trauma" stuff to you,, like how dare you know him so well and have so many tantalizing Mike thoughts /honorary /pos

i think my initial idea was more along the lines of like,, Mike keeps insisting that he didn't mean to hurt Evan, but the more the psychiatrists poke and prod and question him, the less certain Mike is.

All of Mike’s claims that "I didn't know that would happen" and "i didn't mean for him to get hurt" and "i didn't want to kill him" are met with stuff like. "So there's no history of you hurting him?" "So Evan hasn't been put in danger by your actions before?" "So this behavior is a recent thing that came out of nowhere?" And just like. General questions that, whether asked out malice or from people genuinely trying to understand if Mike is a danger to himself or others, only serve to highlight in Mike’s mind that maybe he is inherently evil, because every time he swears that he didn't mean it, he's just met with a reminder of all the times he has in fact hurt Evan and others before and with the reminder that he could do it again at any time.

The idea that there are certain "professionals" there who just insist that Mike is lying about not meaning for the Bite in an effort to get him to cave and break???? Oooooh boy. Angsty, I love it. Maybe as time passes and Mike gets more and more frustrated, his "medical treatment" and "psychiatric professionals" just get worse and worse as a result of his lashing out. It starts out with the psychiatrists just trying to be thorough and get a detailed understanding of what happened, and the mere nature of their questioning frays Mike as he interprets their questions as them not believing him. He tells himself that he's crazy for feeling so attacked by them when they're professionals trained to help people, but like. It doesn't make the problem go away. Mike starts lashing out as he feels like they don't believe him. And his lashing out is ofc seen as signs of hostility, leading to worse and worse "treatment" (in both sense of the term), and leading to him being placed with awful "professionals" who blatantly tell him to his face now that he's lying about not meaning to hurt Evan to get Mike to break.

And the whole experience just, like, shreds every sense of faith Mike had in his own judgment. He doesn't know what to do or think anymore, and it doesn't matter anyway, because no matter WHAT he does or thinks it has the same result of people just. Making him feel cruel and evil, like he'll inevitably hurt someone, like he's a monster and has always been a monster and is trying to manipulate everyone here in the psych facility and everyone he's ever known into thinking he's NOT a monster for his own personal gain.

Worst thing is that in Mike’s eyes, these are strangers who don't even know him or know anything about him, and yet they don't NEED to know him to know that he's evil. Mike coming to the conclusion that theres something so fundamentally broken about him that people can PHYSICALLY SEE IT, he reeks of it, it's the first thing people see when they look at him, the ONLY thing people see. People don't even need to know him to see straight into the evil in his heart. Which is only furthered when he goes back home and all these classmates he never talked to before are calling him a murderer, not to mention Liz's ambivalent reaction to seeing him again.

[thedaveandkimmershow]

So yeah. We're wrapping up January.

January 2023.

Which means one month is basically behind us already.

I wanna say that went fast... but what's really going on is that our January was a packed 18-wheel trailer. Wall to wall. Ceiling to floor. Front to back. Plus, it jumpstarted with the death of Kimmer's uncle, an event that put us in California about a half day after we were informed of it. 

That was New Year's Eve day, by the way. And we spent the next week in full throttle logistics.

If there's a gas pedal for Time... we floored it.

So did things slow down after that? Once we were home? Once we were settled?

Uhhhh... sort of?

There remains long distance logistics. The things needing attention haven't gone away just because we left the state. So, as much as possible, those items are being tended to from here by phone, email, and text until Kimmer goes back in a week or so.

Hmmmmmm.

Was that the only thing we did this month?

No, of course not. Unfortunately, though, the big, bad things of life tend to dominate my memories. So if memory's all I had to go from, I'd guess that was the only thing we did do this month. But, as always, the answer is E. all of the above.

Because it always is.

Nothing really gets paused. Nothing is stopped. It all overlaps with focus shifting between the layers.

For example the admin that goes into our lives together. A certain amount of paperwork. A bit of cleaning, organizing, strategizing, coordinating, modeling and remodeling, and moving slash Tetris-ing things.

For example Linzy had a huuuuge month. Her performances and opportunities were tent poles across the last thirty days. Magnificent tent poles.

For example this was both an editing and an online month for me professionally. It was a little bit of editing up front followed by a lot of YouTube work for Small World Productions. The YouTube work's pretty fun, by the way. It does, though, demand a lot of data managing that occasionally...

Jams my brain. Fills up all the bandwidth.

For example Kimmer continues to do the telehealth thing from home. Along with the never ending charting that goes with it. That is, on top of all the coordinating she's doing for her family... and for ours.

For example aside from the live music we experienced this month, we continue to follow along with the Quantum Leap reboot. We're also definitely huge fans, HUUUUUUUUGE fans, of Poker Face and Wednesday. We actually watch them together, one episode of each on a given night.

And yes. We watched the Harry Potter franchise for a fourth time.

Don't know what to tell you.

It speaks to us.

For example the way we keep our heads from exploding is that we start our days, each day, with devotionals, with Father Mike 'n the bible in a year podcast, with a certain amount of peace and intention, and a bit of contemplation.

It's a rock, this time we take each morning. Holding fast amidst a relentless present. 

And then after that?

Thoughts about the future. 

Not the distant future but this week. This month. This year.

Our mornings, you see, serve as a wide angle lens on our lives. Definitely the best perch from which to plan.

And yes. We've placed various stones up ahead along our path for different purposes. And regardless of how caught up we become in every present to come, we will intersect with those stones, those events, those elements of our lives... at the proper times and places.

Now…

The last "for example" I have is simply the thoughts we carry for other people. Our concerns, maybe, but also a certain amount of figuring out, a certain amount of reaching out, and a certain amount of comparing notes. At the end of which the consensus seems to be that we're all surviving. Which isn't not true. That is, after all, an incredibly low bar and we did clear it.

The way I choose to look at it sometimes, though, is that this is a juggling act we're doing.

And yes.

All the balls are in the air.

And if "balls" doesn't strike you as a sufficient metaphor, then try this instead:

Chainsaws.

😉

[the-singular-peep]

@stevieboyharrington

So I did not completely finish the first 14 of In Which, though I’m close, so here’s a little snack to tide anyone waiting over!! (Ask to be tagged like this wonderful person did if you’d like a notification whenever I end up posting ;^) )

Christmas Eve, 1984

 Hopper grunted when he looked at the calendar. The 24th of December-- Christmas Eve.

Last year at this time, Hopper hadn't thought much of Christmas. He had gone to the work party early in the evening, left his mystery girl in the woods some food, and gone home. He took an early shower and went to sleep at eight, and the next morning he had woken at seven and had done a whole lot of nothing all day.

Then three days later, he had found Eleven.

Naturally, the two did not celebrate a late Christmas. For weeks, Hopper was simply trying to get Eleven accustomed to living in a real home and eating real food, and the holidays didn't even cross his mind. The first week was spent staying up all night with her nightmares, and from then on there was the bed-wetting, and inability to eat whole servings, and then the refusal to eat anything but Eggos. (El had gone straight from scared little animal to stubborn little girl). Then in January, Eleven had gotten terribly sick and that had been all Hopper could think of, and by the time things had settled down a little, the holidays were long past. 

Now it was December 24th of the next year, and Hopper had no idea what to plan to make this special for his daughter's first Christmas.

He had explained Christmas and Santa to her, of course -- to much confusion from Eleven, and then fear at the idea of a fat man breaking into your house and taking your food (That conversation had taken place on the way to the Wheeler’s one morning, and instead of explaining it himself he had pushed her into the house and told her to ask Mike. She had come home that evening with a smile and strong belief in said fat man, though Hopper was sure that the boys did not believe in him themselves.) -- but they hadn't made a plan. He had bought her some things-- some new clothes, tasteful makeup, a series of stuffed animals, a few books and a doll or two -- but that was it.

Now it was the day of, and he had no clue what to do to make the night special. Just as he was having that thought, at 7 am on a Monday in his fleece pajama pants over a pan of bacon, the phone rang.

He rolled his eyes and sighed, because he hated the phone, but before he could answer he heard little feet pattering through the house. He didn’t even have time to remind Eleven to be cautious before he heard her little voice answering an unheard question.

That was a little odd, because ever since he had begun permitting her to pick up the phone the week before, she had developed a bad habit of just standing and breathing into the receiver without saying anything. However, if she was talking, he knew it had to be to someone safe. Before he could ponder it more, or take the bacon off the stove, a little body slammed into his waist and a hand was thrusting the phone in front of his face.

"Joyce." Eleven said plainly as he took the telephone. Hopper put it to his ear.

"Hello?"  

"Hey, Hop! Your daughter tells me that Santa comes tonight, " The cheery voice of Joyce Byers chirped, and Hopper could practically feel her smile.

"Yep, that he does. What can I help you with, Joyce?" Hopper asked, keeping his focus on the way Eleven was trying desperately to unwrap herself from the telephone cord.  

"Well, Will had asked, and I was hoping--" And then Hopper couldn't hear her anymore, because he had dropped the phone and was catching El by the arm as she nearly toppled to the ground. He set her back on her feet by the arm and tousled her hair when she looked up at him with an expression of fear.

“You’re fine, kiddo. Don’t get yourself wrapped up like that, okay?”

Eleven nodded at the instruction and rubbed at her arm, and Hopper bent down to pick up the phone again.

“Sorry ‘bout that.” Hopper said gruffly into the receiver. He started and then stopped again, remembering not to say any name that could be connected with Eleven over the phone. “Kid decided she was gonna be an acrobat and it didn’t go quite as planned.”

Joyce laughed for a moment before continuing.

“Will and I were just wondering… if maybe you and yours would like to come over tonight? Will says he wants to make her Christmas extra special this year. We could have.. I don’t know, hot chocolate, and popcorn and watch a movie… And.. If you two wanted, maybe you could…stay the night?”

Hopper loved the way her voice lilted up at the end, as if she was expecting him to be able to resist any request she made.

“Sounds good to me, let me check with the kiddo.” Hopper put a hand over the receiver and looked to Eleven.

She was currently glaring at the phone cord and tying it up in knots with her mind, just to show her distaste for how it had tripped her. When she noticed Hopper looking at her, she looked up at him and wiped her nose with her sleeve. Hopper shook his head, smiling.

“You weirdo,” He chuckled, and she stuck her tongue out at him, but it was all in good fun. “How do you feel about stayin’ with Joyce and the boys tonight and celebrating Christmas?”

“Yes! Yes!” Eleven said, grinning and nodding emphatically. “Please, Hop, please!”

And that is how the two found themselves in the Byers’ living room at nine PM on a Monday, Hopper festooned with a Christmas hat and his arm around Joyce while Will and Eleven sat cross-legged on the floor with their eyes glued to the television.

“Yeah, that’s Hermie again,” Will said, pointing. Eleven scrunched up her face to think.

“Didn’t go to elf practice?” She asked, trying to clarify which character was which. Will nodded.

“Yup, same one. When I was little I told mom I wanted to be a dentist when I grew up just because Hermie did. I liked his hair.” Will laughed, and Eleven giggled, too.

Jonathon was in the kitchen stirring a pan of hot chocolate when he heard the two younger kids laughing, and he peeped into the living room and smiled.

Will and Eleven had changed into their pajamas about an hour ago, Will now dressed in a blue striped set and Eleven in a yellow polka dotted one, and the sight of the two of them seated on the floor surrounded by popcorn bits was quite endearing. Even more so, however, was his mother, sitting on the couch and leaning heavily on the chief of police, who had his hand tangled in her hair.

Jonathon knew they weren’t dating yet. The wound was still open from the loss of Bob -- that man had truly loved his mother and she had loved him right back -- but, while they weren’t in love, per se, Hopper made his mother feel safe and cared for, and just seeing the way she was around him made Jonathon smile.

Plus Hopper was wearing a Christmas hat. That made him smile, too. He had to get a picture of this.

Very quietly, and after turning off the burner so the hot chocolate wouldn’t scorch, Jonathon moved over to the table and picked up his camera. He was going to take it slow and easy, to get the best shot possible of the people without them noticing so it would be genuine and candid, but before he could he heard voices.

“Where are you going?” His brother’s voice asked, and it was El’s that responded.

“Marshmallows.”

Jonathon heard the sound of someone getting up, and he knew if he waited much longer the moment would be lost. And so, he began to move hastily towards the doorway with his camera in tow. He didn’t even think about the fact that he was wearing socks, or that the floors were hardwood, and before he knew it, Jonathon was sliding into the living room like a regular photography ninja, his legs splayed and hands holding the camera for dear life.  

Maybe, just maybe he would have been unnoticed if he hadn’t shouted. But he was caught off guard by the slipping of his feet, and that surprise outed itself as a shout. Instantly the family looked up, El from her place standing ready to go raid the kitchen.

“Smile!” Jonathon laughed, because his mother had already started smiling at him and Will was laughing at how he burst into the room so unexpectedly, but El and Hopper were less than amused.

El was on a mission for sugar, and she was caught very much off guard.

Hopper was smitten with Jonathon’s mother, and he was caught very much off guard.

The picture that resulted was one that Jonathon would keep forever. His mother had a kind and warm smile on her face, one leg drawn up under her as she leaned over to put a hand on Hopper’s leg. Will sat on the floor by the couch, legs beginning to stretch out, his eyes closed in laughter and his teeth showing.

And then there were El and Hopper, El standing with one fist clenched and the other open in surprise, Hopper sitting with one leg propped on the other and his arm around Joyce, and both of them were wearing the exact same expression. It was a look that conveyed disgust, annoyance, confusion and surprise all in one, and Jonathon almost cackled when he saw how alike they looked.

And then El was at his feet, her head barely reaching his armpit, and she was telling him without words that she was in desperate need for some marshmallows, and that he should help her in her quest.

 “Please,” She added to her unspoken request, and Jonathon laughed. He set the camera on the chair beside him and began off toward the kitchen, still laughing at the look on the house guests’ faces.

That picture later was stuck back in a photo album, with the caption “The Apple Doesn’t Fall Far From the Tree; Family Christmas 1984”

[rauliskafan]

A Hard Lesson in Incrimination: Chapter 7

Authors’ Note: A broken Natalia is heading home without her Atticus. How will Violetta react to the loss of her Papi? And what does Trevor have in mind for his daughter’s next move? Read on for more!!! @vintagemichelle91 and I so hope that you enjoy, and we can never thank you enough for your fantastic feedback!!!

            Coming home was always something to look forward to. Sweet little girls waiting, the light filtering through the French doors, Rafael…

           …now her heart was heavy as she entered the townhouse. Fin was near as Violetta made a mad dash for the doorway causing Natalia to move quickly and wipe away her tears while slipping Rafael’s wedding ring into her pocket.

           “Mami! You finally home!” Violetta exclaimed happily as she tugged at Natalia’s soft blue coat.

           “Yes, sweet pea.” Natalia managed a tight-lipped smile, falling to her knees to bring her daughter to her breast. Fin sidestepped the pair and pulled a confused looking Trevor aside while Alessia tended to the twins. And Natalia’s mind swirled with the worst kind of wonder, dark daydreams of how she would get through the next few days, or longer, until---

           “Mami?”

           Looking up, Natalia saw Violetta’s eyes trained on the open door and the space where her father should stand.

           “Where Papi?” Violetta questioned. “He said he would be back, too.”  

            With a deep breath, Natalia took Violetta’s tiny hands into hers. Gazing into her big emerald eyes, she saw Rafael’s reflection staring back. Where were his eyes now? What was he seeing? Thoughts of shadows and steel and other eyes threatening harm caused her to shudder.

            “Mami?”

            The little girl touched her mother’s arm with a frown while waiting for something in the way of an answer. Scooping her up, Natalia walked past her perplexed parents and sat her daughter on the sofa, searching for the right thing to say.

           “Sweet pea… Papi is not coming home tonight. He---”

           “What?” Violetta quickly asked. “Why? Where he go?”

           “Darling,” Trevor started, moving fast to sit beside them. “Let your mother speak. Let her explain.”

           Even as she thanked Trevor with the smallest of smiles, Natalia did not how she could make Violetta understand. Especially when it made no sense to her.

           “I… it has to do with one of the other lawyers that he worked with. But we will fix the problem, and he’ll be back.. soon.” Because whoever ended Eve Selby’s life was not going to do lay waste to her happy home.

           “He not coming home now?” Violetta asked. “Can’t he fix the problem tomorrow? I want him home tonight.”

           “I know, sweet pea,” Natalia said as she stroked her hair. “Me, too. But he can’t… I...”

           How was she supposed to do this?

           “It like the dream where I no could find him,” Violetta pressed as her little lip began to quiver.

           How could she have any hope of doing...?

           “Violetta, I---”

           “Plus he promise!” she said standing up on the sofa to stare her mother down. “He said he always come home. Why he not here? What happen to him? What happen to Papi?”

           Unable to bring herself to reveal the total truth, she instinctively reached for her daughter, desperate to hold her once more when Violetta pushed her away and fell back to Trevor.

           “No!” Violetta cried, scooting away from her grandfather. “I go look for him myself if you not going to bring him back.”

           Despite Natalia’s cries, Violetta charged towards the door until Fin stopped her and cradled her small face in one hand.

           “Papi wouldn’t want you all out there all by yourself,” Fin tried to reason.

           “Then you take me to him, Tio Fin,” she demanded.

           “Afraid I can’t do that, Little V,” he said as Natalia watched her daughter struggle and sob with tears streaming down her cheeks.

           “I want to see, Papi!” she wailed. “He somewhere alone. We need to get him back.”

           Feeling her heart break, Natalia tried to disentangle her baby from the sergeant’s arms. But her sobs only intensified, the twins taking up the chorus until Ashtonja appeared and gently drew Violetta from Fin’s embrace.  

           “I’ve got you,” Ashtonja whispered while rubbing her back. “Listen to me; doesn’t your Papi always come home after he takes care of the bad guys?”

           “Y--- yes,” Violetta admitted while she wept.

           “So that’s all this is,” Ashtonja said. “And you know what? The sooner we get some sleep, the sooner we’ll see him again.”

           It wasn’t entirely true. Even though Natalia wished it were. But something in the older girl’s tones seemed to ease Violetta to the point where she simply cried softly into Ashtonja’s shoulder.

           “It’s okay, V,” Ashtonja said. “Now let’s get you to bed.”

           “Here. Let me give you a hand.”

           Fin sprang into action, taking one of the twins from Alessia and following Ashtonja up the stairs. Locking eyes with her mother, Natalia pressed her palm to her mouth, trying to keep from breaking down as Trevor waved his wife off.

           “I have this,” he assured Alessia. “Don’t worry about it.”

           “Of course I’m going to worry,” Alessia corrected him. “Natty?”

           “It’s okay, Mommy,” she said. “Just… please give me a moment. And... and take care of my babies.”

           “You never need to ask me for that.”

           With a quick kiss, Alessia was gone, and Natalia looked down to see Trevor’s hand wrapped in hers.  

           “Natalia?”

           Glancing at him through her tears, she finally lost control and fell apart in his arms.

           “There, there,” he soothed, hugging her tighter. “It’s going to be alright.”

           “I don’t know,” Natalia whimpered. “They… oh I can’t stop seeing him like that! And he is all alone. Like… like Violetta said. And he… he has to be so scared. I know… I’m… I’m so…”

           Unable to force out even one more word, she savored her father’s hold along with his silence until her tears were spent and he eased her away, smiling tenderly.

           “A little better now?” he asked.

           “Hardly,” she said.

           “Sorry,” he replied. “Suppose I’m still a little new at…” Meeting his eyes, she bit down on her lip, and Trevor patted her cheek.

           “But I’m going to do my best to help you,” he continued. “Can you share the whole story? The sergeant started to say that---”

          “Rafael’s been accused of that… that Eve Selby’s murder.”

          “Accused?” Trevor echoed.

           “Yes. And… Mike is mixed up in it because… because Rafael was there when she died. He helped us cover that up. And then I had this… this fight with Maggie and… and I just don’t know what to do right now.”

           For a second, she could not read Trevor’s countenance, and she worried as he pulled her towards the balcony.

           “What?” Natalia asked.

           “First things first; did Rafael have anything to do with this woman’s death?”

           “No, he’s innocent!” Natalia swore. “How could you even ask me that?” Pulling away from her father, she gasped lightly when he brought her back to his side.

           “Natalia, I’m sorry,” Trevor said. “If you believe his is innocent, then I do, too.”

           “Thank you for that,” she said, dabbing her eyes with the back of her sleeve. “I know that Eve had other enemies. If only we could find out who---”

           “And now I can actually be of some help,” Trevor calmly explained as he pulled out his phone.

           “What are you doing?” Natalia questioned, all the while watching him type away..

           “Getting in touch with Brenna Harker,” he started. “Lucky she’s local all of sudden.”

           “The last thing that I feel is lucky,” Natalia muttered.

           “That will change,” Trevor assured her. “You’ll meet with Brenna in the morning. Probably best to keep Mike and the others out of it.”

           “But Rafael said---”

           “Natalia, trust me. Brenna can point you in the right directions. And… and if I’m not mistaken…”

           His voice trailed off as he keyed in another text and just as quickly received a response.

           “The pieces are coming together,” Trevor assured his daughter. “Tomorrow we start getting Rafael out of this mess.”

           “You really think so?” Natalia hopefully asked.

           “Brenna came through for you once before,” Trevor said with a knowing look. “And lightning can strike twice. Just look at me and your mother.”

           At that Natalia laughed softy, and Trevor kissed the top of her head.

            “Speaking of which, let me tell her that we will be staying here for the time being.”

           “Oh, you don’t have to do that,” Natalia responded. “I’ll… we’ll be---”

           “I have a lot of lost time to make up for,” Trevor countered. “And besides, do you really think that either one of us would leave you on your own tonight?”

           At that she twisted her head from side to side, and Trevor promised to be back in a second with a stiff drink. She needed it. And a small part of her felt grateful. But despite the full house, Natalia still felt empty.

           Walking to the edge of the balcony, she brought her coat closer and looked up at the blanket of stars hanging overhead. Could he see them? From wherever he was right now? Her hand slipped into her pocket, revealing his discarded wedding ring. Placing it on the same finger as her own, she held it close in her other palm. Tomorrow the wheels would start to turn. Violetta would stay sad until a miracle allowed her world to turn as it had only a few hours earlier. But she had the love of her grandparents, of Ashtonja, and so many others. They would see her through this. Somehow, Natalia would bring her husband home. But wherever Rafael was right now…

           “Please, Atticus,” she murmured. “Just know that I’m with you.”

[nbatrades]

San Diego Clippers & Seattle SuperSonics Swap Guards Phil Smith & Armond Hill

On February 16th, 1982, the San Diego Clippers traded guard Phil Smith to the Seattle SuperSonics for guard Armond Hill and a 1982 second round draft pick (Jeff Taylor).

Armond Hill joined the Seattle SuperSonics at midseason of the 1980-81 season after a trade from the Atlanta Hawks. The Sonics were in the midst of a down season after years of contention. Star guard Gus Williams was in a holdout and had not played for the Sonics during the ‘80-‘81 campaign. Starters Paul Westphal and Lonnie Shelton were limited to 36 and 14 games played due to injury.

The Sonics finished out of the postseason picture for the first time since the 1976-77 season. A strong defender at the guard position, Hill appeared in 51 games and put up 5.0 PPG, 2.1 RPG, 3.4 APG and 0.8 SPG in 21.8 MPG.

Williams returned from his holdout for the 1981-82 season and Shelton was healthy. Seattle began the year with a 3-5 record. The team would find its footing though, reaching a 26-11 mark in the middle of January.

Hill started four of the first five games of the season, but had a limited role. He appeared in 21 games (four starts), and was averaging 2.6 PPG, 1.2 RPG and 1.2 APG when he was traded to the San Diego Clippers. Hill ended his run in Seattle with a stat line of 4.3 PPG, 1.8 RPG, 2.8 APG and 0.6 SPG in 72 career games. Hill shot 38% from the field and 80% from the free-throw line in that time.

Phil Smith became a member of the San Diego Clippers after he was acquired with a first round pick from the Golden State Warriors for guard World B. Free. A former two-time All-Star, Smith was still looking to find his footing and return to All-Star status after partially tearing his achilles tendon during the latter half of the 1978-79 season.

Existing as the player traded for an All-Star and the NBA’s second leading scorer in Free put immense pressure on Smith to fill in and lead the Clippers’ backcourt. During the 1980-81 season, the Clippers struggled early on, going 6-15 in their first 21 games. The team would improve, going 12-5 to reach just two games shy of .500. That would be as close as they would reach to even-steven status. The Clippers finished out of the postseason with a 36-46 mark.

Smith was solid in his first season with the Clippers, managing 16.8 PPG, 2.1 RPG, 4.9 APG and 1.1 SPG in 76 contests and 31.3 MPG. In the 1981 offseason, the Clippers made minor changes. The highlight of their summer was the draft, where the team selected athletic forward Tom Chambers eighth overall in the 1981 draft.

The Clippers had a rocky start during the 1981-82 season, going 2-10 in their first 12 games. The season would not turn around. With a conference-worst 14-37 mark, the Clippers dealt Smith to the Seattle SuperSonics. At the time of the trade, Smith had been inactive with a knee injury suffered on January 20 of that year. He had struggled in his second season with the Clippers. Smith appeared in 48 games (39 starts) and accumulated 13.2 PPG, 2.4 RPG, 4.9 APG and 0.9 SPG in 30.1 MPG.

Smith finished his tenure in San Diego with stats of 15.4 PPG, 2.2 RPG, 4.9 APG and 1.0 SPG in 124 games. The 6′4″ guard shot 47% from the field and 75% from the free-throw line in that time.

Hill was out with a knee injury for the first month after the trade. The injury was discovered in Hill’s physical with the Clippers’ team doctor. When he returned, Hill was largely ineffective. The guard appeared in 19 games (14 starts) with the Clippers and amassed 4.7 PPG on 38.2% shooting, 1.4 RPG, 4.3 APG and 0.8 SPG in 25.3 MPG. Sitting at 14-36 at the time of the trade, the Clippers went 3-29 over their final 32 games to fall to a 17-65 record.

The second round pick that San Diego acquired from Seattle was traded by the Clippers on the eve of the 1982 NBA Draft. The Clippers swapped their 1982 second rounder (42nd) with the Houston Rockets (32nd) in a trade that saw San Diego deal Joe “Jellybean” Bryant to Houston. The Rockets selected Jeff Taylor with the 42nd overall pick.

In the 1982 offseason, Hill became a free agent. He was free to sign anywhere after the Clippers waived their first right of refusal to him. Hill ended up signing a deal with the Milwaukee Bucks.

Acquiring Smith was an indication that the Sonics had moved on from former All-Star Paul Westphal. Smith had a backup role in Seattle upon his arrival. He appeared in 26 games (two starts) and put up 8.2 PPG, 2.7 RPG, 2.8 APG and 0.8 SPG in 22.9 MPG. The SuperSonics continued their march to the playoffs. The club finished with the second best record in the Western Conference at 52-30.

The Sonics went on to the playoffs where they battled the 46-36 Houston Rockets in the opening round. Sonics guard Gus Williams led the way with 27 points and 12 assists in a 102-87 Sonics win. Seattle outscored Houston 61-43 in the second half of that contest.

In Game Two, Houston evened the series with a 91-70 win. The Rockets held the SuperSonics to 34.9% from the field and Moses Malone contributed 28 points and 23 rebounds in the winning effort. The third game saw Jack Sikma put up 30 points and 17 rebounds for Seattle, as the Sonics captured the series 2-1 with a 104-83 rout. Smith played 27 total minutes in the first round, scoring two points.

Seattle moved on to the Semifinals where they ran into George Gervin and the San Antonio Spurs. In the series opener, Gervin had 31 points, including the game-winner with five seconds left in a 95-93 Spurs win. The second game saw Jack Sikma and Gus Williams combine for 60 points. Fred Brown scored 25 off the bench as Seattle cruised to a 114-99 victory that knotted the series 1-1.

As the series scene shifted from Seattle to San Antonio, the Sonics looked to take back homecourt advantage. Seattle built a 21-point lead in the first half of Game Three. The Spurs stormed back, and ended up winning 99-97 after reserve guard Mike Bratz made a shot from the right baseline with five seconds left.

The fourth game was close. Spurs center Dave Corzine nailed four free-throws down the stretch to help the Spurs hold on to a 115-113 win and a 3-1 series lead. In Game Five, Gus Williams had 36 points, but it wasn’t enough. Six Spurs reached double figures as San Antonio won the series with a 109-103 victory. Smith appeared in all five games of the Semifinals, producing 3.8 PPG, 1.2 RPG and 1.0 APG in 13.0 MPG.

In the 1982 offseason, the SuperSonics made a transactional splash, acquiring star David Thompson from the Denver Nuggets for defensive specialist Bill Hanzlik and a first round pick. Thompson took over the starting two-guard spot in Seattle and Smith was his backup.

Seattle had an impressive start, going 12-0 during the start of the 1982-83 season. Their season would be a rollercoaster ride of streaks. A 4-6 stretch was followed by a 7-1 mark over the next eight games.

With the team tied for first in the West with a 23-7 record, Seattle fell apart, going 10-22 to fall to sixth. Seattle moved back up to fourth after a stretch that saw them win 15 of 17 games. After dropping their final three games, Seattle finished with a 48-34 mark. Smith spent much of the year as a reserve. He performed in 79 contests (17 starts) and compiled career-lows of 5.7 PPG, 0.6 SPG and 1.6 RPG along with 2.7 APG in 15.7 MPG.

The SuperSonics had homecourt advantage in a first round matchup with the Portland Trail Blazers. Portland had a 59-45 lead at halftime and led by as much as 16 points in the second half. The Blazers went on to take the game 108-97.

Facing elimination, the Sonics fell behind 72-51 midway in the third quarter. Seattle managed to come back and cut the deficit to three points with 1:41 left in the fourth, but Portland held on for a 105-96 victory and a 2-0 series sweep. Once again, Smith found himself in a reduced role during the playoffs. In the two games against Portland, he scored six points in 19 minutes of action.

Smith was released by the Sonics before the start of the 1983-84 season. He ended his run in Seattle with a line of 6.4 PPG, 1.9 RPG, 2.8 APG and 0.6 SPG in 105 contests. He put up shooting splits of 45% from the field and 75% from the free-throw line.

Phil Smith on joining the Supersonics (via the Times-Advocate):

“I’m pleased. It’s an excellent opportunity for me. I’m going to try to make the most of it. I can provide some experience to this ballclub, plus add some scoring, a little bit of everything.”

On his time in San Diego:

“I enjoyed my stay, he said. I just wish things could have turned out a little bit better. It’s unfortunate things went the way that they did. As a team and as an organization, we didn’t have much luck.”

Seattle Supersonics head coach Lenny Wilkens on the addition of Phil Smith (via the Times-Advocate):

“We’re really delighted to have Phil on the squad. We’ve got a lot of young players on this team, and his experience and leadership will really give us a lift when playoff time rolls around.”

San Diego Clippers head coach Paul Silas on the acquisition of Armond Hill (via the Times-Advocate):

“Armond will join us on Monday and will serve us in a back-up roll until he learns our system. We’re going to hold a late practice on Monday so that Armond can participate. I suspect that hell be a starter as soon as he learns our system. Since Brian Taylor went out (with an achillies tendon injury) two weeks ago, we haven’t had too much leadership at guard. Charlie Criss has assumed some of the responsibility.”

Smith’s wife Angela Smith on her husband going from a losing team to a winning team (via the Times-Advocate):

“I’m really happy that he’s going to a winning team. All the players play as a cohesive unit. Phil is a team player and I think he’ll fit right in.”

If there’s a disappointment in Smith having to play away from the family:

“It’s really not that much different. The way they’ve been playing this season, they’ve hardly had a day off. Then when Phil did come home, he was so tired that he’d either be taking a nap or be running errands or be paying bills. It wasn’t really like him being with us anyway. So I’d rather sacrifice Phil being away as long as he’s happy and he’s going to a good situation. You learn that’s all that really counts.”

Image via Getty Images/Focus On Sport

[and-stir-the-stars]

Do you think Silent Protector AU Mike starts looking forward to Fritz coming to interrogate him, because it’s a reprieve from being left alone with his thoughts? Does he ever worry that he might somehow hurt Fritz like he used to hurt Evan?

That is a phenomenal question! And a question with a complicated answer.

I've been thinking of Mike's "unconscious" state inside the Fredbear suit as being closer to Mike dissociating like hell, rather than him actually being "asleep" as the kids call it.

Whenever Mike is "asleep," he just feels horrifically numb and hollow and anxious and guilty. At a certain point, the most Michael is used to feeling is guilt as the kids watch over him and Evan starts trying to talk to him, and the residual urge to keep Evan safe.

I think when Fritz first tries talking to him, it terrifies Michael out of his mind because Mike is scared of actually feeling again. He's as scared of positive emotions (attachment to Fritz, amusement at Fritz' jokes, etc) as he is of the negative ones (being afraid of hurting Fritz or Evan, and being afraid that Fritz will end up rejecting him the same way Evan did because Michael views himself as Fundamentally A Bad Person). Plus, there's the simple fact that Michael has never viewed himself as being particularly good with kids adding to Mike's anxiety over the situation.

In a way, Michael spent a long time inside the Fredbear suit dissociating and being locked inside a prison of his own self-doubt, self-loathing, fear, and heartache. Then Fritz comes along and accidentally reminds Michael that he's a person, and this is a scary change for Mike at first. It's safer to be numb, and safer to just be a Thing With The Goal of Ensuring Evan's Safety.

Well, I suppose Fritz isn't the first thing to make Michael more conscious in his mind; that honor would have to go to Michael's fear and horror as he is forced to save the kids from the Fire Night Guard. But Evan's attempts to reach out to Mike after that only succeed in driving Mike straight back into dissociating, because he is terrified that he'll hurt Evan again (and terrified that Ev will hurt him again, too, even if deep down Mike believes he deserves Ev hurting him), he's angry at himself for not having the guts or the right words to reach out to Evan, and for causing all this in the first place.

The first time Mike reaches out to Fritz (aka, the "yo ho ho" scene), was an impulsive decision for Mike. It was partly Mike being uncertain after Fritz presented Mike actually talking to them as being helpful to the kids and Evan when Mike has been thinking talking would be the exact opposite; I think he wanted to test the waters a bit but didn't know what to say, and fell back on the joke. And as much as Mike wouldn't want to admit it, yeah, it had a lot to do with him being lonely, too.

After Mike thinks through that decision to test the waters for more than 0.3 seconds, he decides that nonononononono, that was an awful idea, i should not have done that, nonononono--!

Except Fritz keeps coming back. The kid absolutely will not leave him alone. Fritz keeps tugging at Mike's "I'm not a person, I must be as unobtrusive as possible, it's what i deserve, I must keep Evan safe" safety net with every visit, and eventually it comes away entirely. It's easier to talk to Fritz because, unlike with Evan, there is no guilt over what he did or stress and anxiety over never being able to say the right thing to help Ev heal or show how sorry Mike is for what happened.

Mike is terrified of being a Person again, and he's terrified that some how and in some way he will fuck up Fritz ('because Michael Afton always fucks up everything he touches,' Mike thinks), and he KNOWS that this is only going to end badly, but somehow, after Fritz has visited him several times, Mike is startled to find that he's been looking forward to whenever Fritz will visit him next, rather than feeling anxious about it. And soon enough, despite knowing that he absolutely SHOULD NOT say anything, he just... can't stop himself.

Mike finds that he doesn't just want the other ghost kids to be safe, he wants them to be happy, too. Fritz's disappointment at the recent lack of response and the memory of how happy Fritz was when Mike talked that first time might just have had an impact on Mikey.

Mike ends up wanting to protect Fritz as much as he wants to protect Evan, and maybe Mike is projecting the relationship he could/should have had with Ev onto Fritz, too.