#Ask KoJu

[pikslasrce]

"sunđerbob je dosadan" ok lignjoslave /lh

lignjoslav je jedini bio donekle normalan tamo, što mnogo govori o samom crtanom 💀

[writingoddess1125]

Hi!! I was wondering if you could do a kind of platonic Sanji x afab reader where the reader is apart of the straw hat crew and they just got to the Baratie and Sanji keeps trying to flirt with the reader but then he finds out she has a girlfriend and is absolutely flabbergasted/shocked, I think it would be kinda funny

Friend like me!

Platonic Fem Reader x Sanji

I tried 🤣 I laughed while writing this and did have a friend of mine help me!

When the crew had picked you up from Koju Island they had seen a fierce female pirate with amazing skills with a blade and art making you the resident Barber/Artist on the Going Merry.

While the crew had definitely warmed up to you, one thing that became undoubtedly clear was- you were a bit of a Pervert.

When you and the crew arrived at the Baratie you had already tried to scope the scene and see what hotties were there, sure you would never cheat but you did enjoy admiring a artistic form.

It wasn't till the waiter came, first spilling some hateful words about the 'Shitty' restaurant in clear distaste which made you snort a laugh- His eyes catching yours.

You saw how his eyes lingered on your form, his eyes traveling across your bust and face for a brief moment and doing the same with Nami- Oh this would be good.

"What can I get for you two lovely ladies tonight?, We have a Poulet Breton, Coq au Vin and Roast Beef as specials tonight which would pair well with the house Merlot or we do have a fine Rosé that may suit you two better" He said with upmost kindness and politeness, intent pouring from his lips.

Nami sighed, clearly ready for some snide comment as per usual but you decided to have some fun.

"And what do you recommend? Personally" You say, seeing the waiters cheeks grow red at he gave you a crookened smile.

"(Y/N) stop teasing the damn Waiter-" Zoro finally cut in, Knowing you were just building him up to rip him to the bottom anyway.

"I'm a chef, not a waiter" Sanji said sharply "And if the pretty lady likes me then that's all that matters Green top-" Zoro glared at him and finally you laughed.

"I'm gonna have to stop you there, I already have a beautiful partner that I don't plan on letting go of" You say honestly, seeing him deflate a bit at hearing this.

"Ah I do apologize I didn't realize you had a bo-" You cut him off again.

"Girlfriend-" You say with a smirk, watching the blondes eyes widen in surprise.

"Really?" He said his eyes drifting to the red head which you shook head at mouthing 'Hotter' in response and he raised his brows impressed.

"Yes its called being a lesbian-" You say plainly, Zoro sighing at this and rubbing his temple as the rest of the crew stared at you and the waiter.

It was then that you two stared at each other.. like a 6th sense took over that felt the fellow presence of a fellow Pervert.

"So you're telling me you appreciate the female form" He said with a serious look on his face, you meeting his gaze with equal amount of seriousness.

"I fucking love it-" You say, before a smile stretches out over both of your guys lips like some wicked imps. You and him going into stories of beautiful women, you quite heavily over explaining your own girlfriend which Sanji agreed sounded like she was hot- Before delving into the models he had seen here at Baratie. Like you two where comparing notes for a very important study.

The Strawhats watching this with a dumbfounded look on their face and Zoro with absolute disgust.

"Did we just watch a unlikely friendship bloom between two perverts?-" Nami asked as she watched you and Sanji rave about beautiful women, Usopp nodding softly in conformation.

"Yep-"

The crew sighed heavily at this- At least their wasn't a fight to clean up..

[ask-dr-kujo]

Hey gu guess waht vuess what jotaro Koju guess wath

-DIO (@ask-the-creatures also let me know if I'm annoying you in anyway -mod)

You again?!

What the hell do you want. I'm not going to be doing any favors for you.

-Jotaro

(You're good! Dw!)//mod

[venomouspretzel]

Musical ask game!

when u get this, list 5 songs u like to listen to, publish. then, send this ask to 10 of your favorite followers (positivity is cool) <333

Ah! Well, here's the list I can think of off the top of my head:

- Handy by Weird Al

- Sorry For Party Rocking by LMFAO

- Đurđevdan je, a ja nisam s onom koju volim by Bijelo Dugme

- Queen Of Pain by The Cramps

- Hola by Miranda!

[everythingsinred]

for the ask game: 3, 26, 30

thanks for the ask!!

3. three songs you were recently obsessed with

this one is amazing and i have been playing it on repeat for like a month without getting sick of it!

theres also this one

i've been realizing lately that i tend to rly like dominic fike's songs

and lastly this one

it's really beautiful and so enthralling that i never even realize how LONG it is. also i watched little miss sunshine recently (this song is in it) and was reminded of how GREAT a movie that is <3 just good vibes all around

26. three favourite non-English songs

i have serbian citizenship so i have to represent here! (although we'll just say ex-yugo for the sake of simplicity and accuracy... i prefer to identify that way anyway despite the confusion that sometimes brings.)

this one is a classic! it's so fun to listen to and even more fun to sing along to

AND YET ANOTHER CLASSIC

i have loved this song for a rly long time. the title translates to "my life is switzerland", which is a metaphor, and not literal. my aunt asked me why i like this song so much because it didn't make sense to her that i would like a song i couldnt personally relate to. she, for one, "related" to this song bc shes a serb who moved to germany (close to switzerland...?) and considered it "her song". i didnt rly know how to explain to her that 1. she misunderstood the song entirely and 2. almost none of the songs i love apply to me personally

and for female touch there's this:

which is a cute and upbeat song <3 i tend to prefer this era of yugo music... new songs are hit or miss for me. i wanna listen to more music from serbia (and all ex-yu) but its kinda hard to get into it when i live in the us and am constantly surrounded by songs in english

30. three songs you really want your followers to know (for reasons other than all those above)

simple enough, there's this

i (thankfully) dont relate to this song and it's not aspirational or anything so it wouldn't fit in any category or be used by me in a ship playlist. i just LOVE it so much! one of my favorite songs by her <3

also this one

i really like this... i dont have a comment and thus it doesnt fit in a category.

moving on...

ONE OF MY ABSOLUTE FAVORITES. it's originally a balkan romani song that's gained popularity throughout the former yugo-countries. it has a sad story of being sung out of defiance by prisoners on the train from sarajevo to the jasenovac concentration camp, where the ustase murdered many serbs, jews, and roma (the exact number of ppl killed under the ustasa is not known after a long period of it being significantly downplayed and is subject to debate). that particular incident gives the song an extra sad flavor, but it's still a really beautiful song i love listening to. (i also apologize to anybody who knows more than me about the history of the song. i'm sure my description is minimal and could be expanded on)

thank u for asking, again! this was really fun <3

feel free to ask any more. i spend 20 hours a day listening to music so...

[timelessxmemories]

Incorrect quotes featuring Tseng/Koi + Lock/Koju

@ghostlyeye

———

Tseng, sweating: Koi, there’s something I need to ask you-

Koi: Finally! You’re proposing!

Tseng: How’d you know?

Koi: Tseng, you’ve dropped the ring five times during dinner.

Koi: I even picked it up once.

———

Koju: I have feelings for you.

Lock: Why? What's wrong with you? Are you sure you're okay?

———

Koi: I love you.

Tseng, not paying attention: What was that?

Koi: I said I’m selling you to the zOo-

———

Lock: What are you in the mood for?

Koju: World domination.

Lock: That's a bit ambitious.

Koju: You are my world.

Lock: Aww...

Koju:

Lock:

Koju:

Lock: OH.

———

Tseng: Sorry I’m late, I was doing things.

Koi: Hi, I’m ‘things’.

———

*Koju comes home absolutely drunk, undresses, and stands in their bedroom.*

Lock: Babe, are you.. coming to bed?

Koju: No thank you, I’m sure you’re lovely but I have a girlfriend.

Koju: *Lies on the ground and falls asleep*

Lock:

Lock, whispering: I fucking love you.

[leviathanverse]

Bonus Chapter: Bloopers

Chapter 1:

Y/n: How do I use this thing?!

Me: This is the fifth time I have to show you!

The actors: *Laughs in the background*

Y/n: I hate my role!

Me: Suck it up!

Chapter 2:

Y/n: Why do I always get to do missions?! Oh wait- favoritism.

Me: Y- WHAT?! NO! You are the main character! That's why!

Y/n: Favoritism.

Me: Shut up!

Chapter 3:

Me: Is the dragon ready for the shoot?

Mylou: Yes! But he doesn't want to listen!

Me: Get him to behave then!

Mylou: I am trying!

Y/n: That is a big ass dragon!

Me/ Mylou: You just notice this now?!

Y/n: No?

Me: *Sighs*

Mylou: ...

Chapter 4:

Y/n: *Reads their script*

Me: ....

Y/n: *Eyes widen as they spit out their coffee* WHY THE FUCK AM I GOING TO BE A PSYCHO IN THIS PART?!

Me: ...

Mylou: We like drama.

Me: *Wheezes after thinking about the meme*

Chapter 5:

Y/n: *Looks at Zoha, at their script and back at Zoha repeatedly and then at me* I AM GOING TO GET EATEN BY HIM?!

Me: Yes. You have a problem with that?

Y/n: How am I going to stay alive?! And why do I have so much trauma?!

Me: Ask Mylou about the eaten part. As for trauma? More drama.

Mylou: *Looks at us while trying to control Zoha* I AM TRAINING HIM!

Zoha: *Runs around the studio*

Me: *Casually sips coffee* This is normal.

Chapter 6:

Me: You ready?

Mylou: Yeee- wwwwwooooooaaaaahhhhhh!

Me: *Facepalms and sighs* Nevermind. We'll take the shot when you are done being dragged around by Zoha.

Chapter 7:

Me: And cut! Well done everyone!

Y/n: *Getting the slime off* Yeah. At least I didn't get knocked off my f- *Gets swept off their feet by Zoha's tail* Nevermind.

Me, Sakura, Mylou and Yami: *Laughs*

The actors playing as guards and poachers: *Falls on the ground while laughing*

Y/n: Assholes. Don't laugh at me!

Chapter 8:

Me: Everyone in place?

Y/n: I am so ready!

Me: Good! Because the Moon Wraith is ready!

Y/n: WHERE WAS THAT IN THE SCRIPT?!

Me: Nowhere. Just added it.

Mylou: Magic.

Me: *Wheezes*

Chapter 9:

Y/n: *Chatting with Yami*

Me: Everyone get ready!

Y/n and Yami: *Holds their hearts* That scared me...

Me: Good. Means you are ready for the next shoot.

Chapter 10:

Sakura: *About to say something but forgets the script* What was I supposed to say again?

Me: OH COME ON! This is the 30th time!

Sakura: Suffer.

Chapter 11:

Sakura: *Reading her script*

Yami: What are you doing?

Sakura: Reading my script. *Sips liquid in her glass*

Y/n: What's that in your hand?

Sakura: A drink.

Y/n: Vodka! I like your st-

Sakura: Viniger.

Yami: What?!

Sakura: It's viniger.

Yami and Y/n: Coward!

Chapter 12:

Y/n: I love the wounds.

Sakura: Shush! Let me finish your make-up!

Y/n: ... Did you know that-

Sakura: Shut up!

Chapter 13:

Y/n: Guys... I have a fever.

Me: Oh! What a coincidence! I was just finishing your script of having a fever!

Y/n: You have got to be kidding me.

Me: Nope! Besides, Mylou is getting Zoha ready!

Y/n: *Sobs in suffering* WHY ME?!

Me: Because I planned so!

Chapter 14:

Yami: This is the most ugliest outfit I have ever seen in my entire life! Who designed this?!

Me: *Gasps* How dare you?! I spent £700 on that!

Yami: *Rolls eyes* Yeah right.

Me: *Cries* Why you bully me?!

Chapter 15:

Me: *Sees a roach* Oh hell no! *Runs away*

Chapter 16:

Y/n: Anyways, I got my nails done!

Chiyeko: What nails?

Y/n: ...

Zika: Hey guys! I did my hair!

Every actor except Y/n: Oh my goodness! So pretty! I love it!

Y/n: *Sulks in a corner* Why me before the shooting?

Chapter 17:

Y/n: Has anyone seen my costume?

Reina and Kai: *Has pink and green pain on their clothes* Nope!

Y/n: *Whines* Guuuyyyyysssss!

Chapter 18:

Y/n: Soo.... why am I doing this in the scene?

Me: Because I said so.

Y/n: Ah! Okay, okay!

Not even 5 minutes later

Y/n: I'm a Barbie girl! In a Barbie world!

Me: Keep the noise down!

Mylou: ... Why did I agree to this?

Me: Because I love your au.

Chapter 19:

Koju: Stop saying weird shit!

Me: You aren't in the script!

Koju: Oops-

Me: *Groans* I need more coffee.

Zoha: *Chews on some of the wires*

Me: Mylou! Your pet is eating the wires again!

Chapter 20:

Y/n: ... Why am I here? Just to suffer?

Me: Is that a meme?

Y/n: You need some milk.

Mylou: *Feeds Zoha cows* Huh? Who?

Me: *Dying inside*

Chapter 21:

Hīrā: Why am I not on screen?!

Me: Because you have no important role.

Hīrā: *Cries*

Me: I love your pain.

Everyone: *Concerned*

Chapter 22:

Me: Y/n! Follow your script!

Y/n: *Doing ballet* Shut the fuck up! I am practicing!

Sakura: I shall pray for you.

Me: COME HERE YOU LITTLE SHIT!

Y/n: AAAAAAHHHHHHHH!

Yami: So? Where was I?

Sakura: By the time you wrestled a crocodile?

Yami: Oh yeah! Anyways!

Chapter 23:

Y/n: Uno!

Zika: I thought we were playing Go fish?

Y/n: ... Oops-

Chapter 24:

Y/n: *Manages to pull a muscle* Ow.

Me: How did you get that right?!

Mylou: *Watches the chaos unfold* I love drama.

Chapter 25:

Chiyeko: Kai! Where are you! *Sees Kai in a dumpster*

Kai: ... Leave my house!

Chiyeko: THAT'S A GARBISH BIN!

Kai: IT'S A DUMPSTER!

Chapter 26:

Mylou: Should I be concerned?

*All actors panicking at Zoha chasing them*

Me: *Sips coffee* Nah. This is better than a movie.

Chapter 27:

Yami: *Stares at Sakura*

Sakura: *Stares back at Yami*

Me: *Using a megaphone* Alright everyone!

Yami and Sakura: *Dies from heart attack*

Me: Oops.

Chapter 28:

Mylou: Zoha?! Where are y- oh. Hello!

Yami: *Held like a teddy bear by Zoha* Help...

Mylou: *Takes a photo*

Me: Huh? *Wheezes when seeing Yami's predicament*

Chapter 29:

Me: ... Who knows how to take care of a small fire?

Sakura: Oh! I do!

Me: Follow Me!

Not even a second later in the kitchen

Sakura: How did you manage to set the microwave on fire?!

Me: My problems.

*Cardboard boxes in the door way*

Sakura: *Screams*

Me: *Wheezes*

Chapter 30:

Zika: Does anyone know what ADHD stands for?

Mylou: Y-

Zika: It actually stands for Attenttion Deficit *Sees me with donuts* Hey Donuts!

Mylou: *Confused*

Chapter 31:

Y/n: Ummm... Hello there!

Me: *Facepalms* Not again.

Zoha: Hello!

Mylou: *Laughs*

Me: I need more sleep.

Chapter 32:

Yami: *Sees something in the script* Huh?

Y/n: What?

Yami: That's new. Never knew I was flat.

Y/n: *Spits out her coffee* What?!

Yami: Yeah... just saw that in my scripts.

Y/n: Wait- why did you read your entire script?

Yami: Was bored.

Y/n: ○-○

Chapter 33:

Me: Nice job everyone!

All the actors: *Dead*

Me: Okay! You can take a three hour break!

All the actors: *Comes back to life and talking*

Me: ...

Chapter 34:

Me: Mylou! Where are your pets?!

Mylou: IDK!

Lights go out

Mylou: Oh wait- I know now.

Me: Oh do you?!

Chapter 35:

Everyone: *Epic fight between who eats the last slice of pizza*

Me: *Eats the last slice* Delicious.

Everyone: *Stares at me in disappointment* Not again.

Me: Lol.

Chapter 36:

Me: Mylou, get Zoha.

Mylou: I can't.

Me: What do you mean you can't.

Mylou: He sleeping. *Points at Zoha*

Me: *Looks at Zoha* Awww! He can sleep!

All the actors: Favoritism.

Chapter 37:

Zoha: *Angry as fuck*

All the actors except Y/n: *Scared*

Y/n: Morning Zoha! *Skips into the kitchen*

Zoha: *Happy*

All the actors except Y/n: ... HOW?!

Chapter 38:

Me: *Starts filming*

Mylou: *Forgets we're filming* Good boy. *Pats Zoha*

Everyone except Mylou: Aaaaawwwwwww!

Chapter 39:

Sakura: Why did I die?

Me: I like drama.

Mylou: *Wheezes*

Sakura: And I like b-

Me: We know. You love Chiyeko.

Sakura: *Embarrassed*

Chapter 40:

Sakura: I am back from the dead!

Me: *Stops filming* Stop ruining the filming!

Sakura: *Flips the bird*

Me: COME HERE! Let's see how you enjoy being carried by a dog dragon!

Mylou: ●_●

Previous

[wweassets]

Koju Takeda going viral it’s so many people asking for someone to remove the censor on of the pictures. I did not know this man was completely naked in one his matches only ones I’ve seen is his bare ass that’s all. 😭

Here’s the link

https://x.com/dickdoh/status/1758299767245779388?s=46&t=n3bs_sOFi9VF51JJRn58lg

he deserves…. everyone should come here to join the discussion !

[lamija-v]

🎶✨when you get this, put 5 songs you actually listen to, then publish. Send this ask to 10 of your favorite followers (positivity is cool)🎶✨

aaaa thank you for sending me this! 🫶

Most of my most listened songs rn are by Mrs Swift but I’ll try to be a little more diverse

1. Đurđevdan je a ja nisam s onom koju volim by Bijelo Dugme

2. Suada by Plavi Orkestar

3. Nisam te zbog lepote voleo by Željko Joksimović (tbh his entire discography should be up here but I can’t list just his songs)

4. Haunted by Taylor Swift (again, I want to put entirety of folklore and speak now here, along with some other albums)

5. Fratello by Aerodrom

[remenar]

[SAŽETAK] How to Win Friends and Influence People - Dale Carnegie

Knjiga koja je gotovo 90 godina u tisku. 90 godina kasnije i dalje je relevantna kao i dana kada je objavljena. I, nesumnjivo, bit će relevantna u idućih 90 godina. Knjiga koju se isplati pročitati. Pročitati više puta. Izdvojiti principe i svako toliko se podsjetiti tih principa. Podsjetiti se principa kada se nađete u teškoj - ili novoj - situaciji. Iz prethodnog paragrafa vjerujem da je vidljivo koliko sam oduševljen. Oduševljen sam s principima koji su, u stvari, zdrava logika. Ali nikada to ne primijetimo dok nisu ovako eksplicitno napisane. Uživajte u sažetku. Ispišite ga. Pogledajte video sažetke. Kupite i pročitajte knjigu. Isplati se. I ponovite sve barem još jednom. I promatrajte kako se odnosi u vašem životu mijenjaju na bolje.

Fundamental Techniques in Handling People

"By criticizing, we do not make lasting changes and often incur resentment" "When dealing with people, let us remember we are not dealing with creatures of logic. We are dealing with creatures of emotion" "Instead of condemning people, let's try to understand them. Let's try to figure out why they do what they do" "Principle 1. Don't criticize, condemn or complain" "Flattery is counterfeit, and like counterfeit money, it will eventually get you into trouble if you pass it to someone else" "Principle 2. Give honest and sincere appreciation" "So the only way on earth to influence other people is to talk about what they want and show them how to get it" "If there is any secret to success, said Henry Ford, it lies in the ability to get the other person's point of view and see things from that person's angle as well as from your own" "The world is full of people who are grabbing and self-seeking. So the rare individual who unselfishly tries to serve others has an enormous advantage" "Principle 3. Arouse in the other person an eager want"

Part Two - Six Ways to Make People Like You

"You can make more friends in two months by becoming interested in other people than you can in two years by trying to get other people interested in you" "I have discovered from personal experience that one can win the attention and time and cooperation of even the most sought-after people by becoming genuinely interested in them" "In we want to make friends, let's put ourselves out to do things for other people - things that require time, energy, unselfishness and thoughtfulness" "Principle 1. Become genuinely interested in other people" "The effect of a smile is powerful - even when it's unseen" "You must have a good time meeting people of you expect them to have a good time meeting you" "Your smile is a messenger of your good will" "Principle 2. Smile" "Principle 3. Remember that a person's name is to that person the sweetest and most important sound in any language" "Exclusive attention to the person who is speaking to you is very important. Nothing else is flattering as that" "So if you aspire to be a good conversationalist, be an active listener. To be interesting, be interested. Ask questions that other person will enjoy answering" "Principle 4. Be a good listener. Encourage other to talk about themselves" "For Roosevelt knew, as all leaders know, that the royal road to a person's heart is to talk about the things he or she treasures most" "Principle 5. Talk is terms of the other person's interests" "The law is this: Always make the other person feel important" "Principle 6. Make the other person feel important - and do it sincerely"

Part Three - How to Win People to Your Way of Thinking

"As a result of this, I have come to the conclusion that there is only one way under the high heaven to get the best of an argument - and that is to avoid it" "You can't win an argument" "A man convinced against his will is of the same opinion still" "Principle 1. The only way to get the best of an argument is to avoid it" "If you are going to prove something, don't let anybody know it. Do it so subtly, that no one will feel that you are doing it" "You will never get into trouble by admitting that you may be wrong" "I am convinced now that nothing good is accomplished and a lot damage can be done if you tell a person straight out that he or she is wrong" "Principle 2. Show respect for the other person's opinions. Never say 'You're wrong'" "Say about yourself all the derogatory things you know the other person is thinking or wants to say or intends to say - and say them before that person has a chance to say them" "Principle 3. If you are wrong, admit it quickly and empathically" "The sun can make you take off your coat more quickly than the wind, and kindness, the friendly approach and appreciation can make people change their minds more readily than all the bluster and storming in the world" "Principle 4. Begin in the friendly way" "In talking with people, don't begin by discussing the things on which you differ" "He asked questions with which his opponents would have to agree" "Principle 5. Get the other person saying 'yes, yes' immediately" "Let the other people talk themselves out" "Principle 6. Let the other person do a great deal of talking" "No one likes to feel he or she is being sold something or told to do a thing. We much prefer to feel that we are buying of our own accord or acting on our own ideas" "Principle 7. Let the other person feel that the idea is his or hers" "Remember that other people may be totally wrong. But they don't think so" "Principle 8. Try honestly to see things from the other person's point of view" "Principle 9. Be sympathetic with the other person's ideas and desires" "To put it differently and perhaps more clearly, people are honest and want to discharge their obligations" "Principle 10. Appeal to the nobler motives" "This is the dog of dramatization. Merely stating a truth isn't enough. The truth has to be made vivid, interesting and dramatic" "Principle 11. Dramatise your ideas" "The desire to excel! The challenge! Throwing down the gauntlet! An infallible way of appealing to people of spirit" "The one major factor that motivated people was the work itself" "This is what every successful person loves: the game" "Principle 12- Throw down a challenge"

Part Four - Be a Leader: How to Change People Without Giving Offence or Arousing Resentment

"It is always easier to listen to unpleasant things after we have heard some praise of our good points" "Principle 1. Begin with praise and honest appreciation" "This could be easily overcome by changing the word 'but' to 'and'" "Calling attention to one's mistakes works wonders with sensitive people who may resent bitterly any direct criticism" "Principle 2. Call attention to people's mistakes indirectly" "It isn't nearly so difficult to listen to a recital of your faults if the person criticising by humbly admitting that he, too, is far from impeccable" "Admitting one's mistakes - even when one hasn't corrected them - can help convince somebody to change his behavior" "Principle 3. Talk about your own mistakes before criticising the other person" "A technique like that makes it easy for person to correct errors. It encourages cooperation instead of rebellion" "People are more likely to accept an order if they have had a part in the decision that caused the order to be issued" "Principle 4. Ask questions instead of giving direct orders" "Letting one save face! How important, how vitally important that is!" "Principle 5. Let the other person save face" "Let us praise even the slightest improvement. That inspires the other person to keep on improving" "Remember, we all crave appreciation and recognition, and will do almost anything to get it" "Abilities wither under criticism; they blossom under encouragement" "Principle 6. Praise the slightest improvement and praise every improvement. Be hearty in your approbation and lavish in your praise" "Principle 7. Give the other person a fine reputation to live up to" "Be liberal with your encouragement, make the thing seem easy to do, let the other person know that you have faith in his ability to do it, that he has an undeveloped flair for it - and he will practice until dawn comes in the window in order to excel" "Principle 8. Use encouragement. Make the fault seem easy to correct" "This technique of giving titles and authority worked for the Napoleon and it will work for you" "Principle 9. Make the other person happy about doing the thing you suggest"

Dodatne poveznice

Goodreads: How to Win Friends and Influence People Amazon: How to Win Friends and Influence People Blackwell's: How to Win Friends and Influence People

Video materijali

Preuzimanje sažetka

PDF: How to Win Friends and Influence People - PDF MOBI: How to Win Friends and Influence People - MOBI EPUB: How to Win Friends and Influence People - EPUB Read the full article

[jubaer01]

CROATIA CITIZENS - INDIAN ELECTRONIC VISA Fast and Urgent Indian Government Visa - Electronic Visa Indian Application Online

Brza i ubrzana indijska službena eVisa online aplikacija

Address : Boškovićeva ul. 2, 10000, Zagreb, Croatia

Phone : +385 1 4870 650

Email : info@indiavisa-online.org

Website : https://www.visasindia.org/hr/visa/ 

Business Hours : 24/7/365

Owner / Official Contact Name : Chander Mali Chowdhary

Description : Indijska vlada uvela je eVisa za brza odobrenja od 2014. Ta je mogućnost bila ograničena na nekoliko zemalja, ali sada je proširena na više od 166 nacionalnosti. Postoji pet vrsta indijskih eVisa kao što su konferencijska, poslovna, turistička, medicinska i medicinska pomoć. Ispunjavanje online obrasca za indijsku eVisa traje samo 2 minute. Nakon što izvršite uplatu, potrebno je 72 sata da primite eVisa za Indiju putem e-pošte. Nema pečata ili naljepnice na putovnici koja je potrebna za indijsku poslovnu vizu ili indijsku turističku vizu. Možete se odvesti do zračne ili morske luke i posjetiti Indiju. Imigracijski službenici u vašoj zemlji znaju da je indijska eVisa ili elektronička viza povezana s vašom putovnicom u računalnom sustavu. Ovo je najprikladniji način za ulazak u Indiju. Od vas se može tražiti da prenesete fotografiju lica ili stranicu putovnice, ako je ne možete učitati, jednostavno nam je možete poslati e-poštom putem veze Kontaktirajte nas na našoj web stranici. Naše ljubazno i ​​uslužno osoblje odgovorit će vam i pomoći vam u roku od 24 sata. Ako želite ostati u Indiji manje od 6 mjeseci, onda je ova vrsta elektroničke indijske eVise idealna i najprikladnija za vaše potrebe. Jedina stvar koju trebate provjeriti je da vam putovnica vrijedi 6 mjeseci kada uđete u Indiju i da ima nekoliko praznih stranica kako bi vam imigracijski službenici mogli dopustiti ulazak u zračnu i morsku luku i staviti pečat. Niste obavezni poslati svoju putovnicu kurirom ili dobiti eVisa stmap na putovnicu. Samo zadržite e-poruku odobrenja eVisa na svom telefonu ili možete zadržati ispisanu kopiju. Više od 166 zemalja ispunjava uvjete za prijavu, ovdje je uzorak nekoliko zemalja koje mogu primijeniti 100 posto online postupak za indijsku elektroničku vizu, Finska, Austrija, Saudijska Arabija, Indonezija, UAE, SAD, Filipini, Estonija, Švedska, Brazil, Republika Koreja , Australija, Portugal, Bruneji, Izrael, Španjolska, Japan, Katar, Jordan, Grčka, Danska, Litva, Bolivija, Mađarska, Norveška, Latvija, Argentina, Gruzija, Hrvatska, Singapur, Bocvana, Njemačka, Laos, Cipar, Kolumbija, Meksiko , Belgija, Malezija, Poljska, Venezuela, Oman, Bosna i Hercegovina, Češka, Šri Lanka, Azerbajdžan, Kazahstan, Irska, Čile, Bjelorusija, Novi Zeland, Armenija, Italija, Peru, Francuska, Bugarska, Rumunjska, Ujedinjeno Kraljevstvo, Tajvan , Island, Kanada, Paragvaj, Belize, Južna Afrika, Vijetnam, Rusija, Kambodža, Fidži, Švicarska, Nizozemska  Indian Government has introduced eVisa for rapid approvals since 2014. This facility was limited to a few countries, but now it has been extended to over 166 nationalities. There are five types of India eVisa such as Conference, Business, Tourist, Medical and Medical Attendant. The online form for Indian eVisa takes only 2 minutes to complete. Once you have made the payment, then eVisa for India takes 72 hours to receive by email. There is no stamp or sticker on the passport required for Indian Business Visa or Indian Tourist Visa.

You can drive to the airport or seaport and visit India. The immigration officers in your home country know that Indian eVisa or electronic Visa is linked to your passport in the computer system. This is the most convenient way to enter India. You may be asked to upload face photo or passport page photo, if you cannot upload it then you can simply email it to us via Contact Us link on our website. Our friendly and helpful staff will respond and assist you within 24 hours. If you want to stay in India for less than 6 months, then this type of electronic Indian eVisa is ideal and best suited for your needs. The only thing you need to make sure is that your passport has 6 months of validity when you enter India and it has couple of blank pages so that immigration officers can allow you to enter the airport and seaport and put a stamp. You are not required to courier  your passport or get an eVisa stmap on the passport. Just keep the approval eVisa email on your phone or you may keep a printout copy of it. Over 166 countries are eligible to apply, here is a sample of few that can apply 100 percent online process for Indian electronic Visa, Finland, Austria, Saudi Arabia, Indonesia, UAE, USA, Philippines, Estonia, Sweden, Brazil, Republic of Korea, Australia, Portugal, Brunei, Israel, Spain, Japan, Qatar, Jordan, Greece, Denmark, Lithuania, Bolivia, Hungary, Norway, Latvia, Argentina, Georgia, Croatia, Singapore, Botswana, Germany, Laos, Cyprus, Colombia, Mexico, Belgium, Malaysia, Poland, Venezuela, Oman, Bosnia  and Herzegovina, Czech Republic, Sri Lanka, Azerbaijan, Kazakhstan, Ireland, Chile, Belarus, New Zealand, Armenia, Italy, Peru, France, Bulgaria, Romania, United Kingdom, Taiwan, Iceland, Canada, Paraguay, Belize, South Africa, Vietnam, Russia, Cambodia, Fiji, Switzerland, Netherlands 

Keywords : indijska viza, viza za Indiju, evisa Indija, indijska eviza, indijska viza online, indijska viza prijava, indijska viza online prijava, indijska viza online aplikacija, indijska viza online prijava, indijska viza online aplikacija, evisa Indija, indijska eviza, indijska poslovna viza , indijska medicinska viza, indijska turistička viza, indijska viza, indijska viza, indijska viza online, indijska viza online, viza za Indiju, viza za Indiju, indijska eviza, evisa Indija, indijska poslovna viza, indijska turistička viza, indijska medicinska viza, Indija centar za podnošenje zahtjeva za vizu, indijska viza za naše građane, indijska viza iz SAD-a, indijska viza za Amerikance. hitna viza za Indiju, hitna viza za Indiju. indijska viza za naše građane, indijska viza za građane Kanade, indijska viza za građane Novog Zelanda, indijska viza za državljane Australije, indijska viza za državljane Velike Britanije. indijska viza za državljane Japana, indijska viza za državljane Koreje, indijska viza za državljane Tajvana, indijska viza za državljane Danske, indijska viza za državljane Belgije, indijska viza za državljane Švicarske. indian visa, visa for india, evisa india, india evisa, indian visa online, indian visa application, india visa online application, indian visa online application, india visa application online,

[negovateljica]

MORAŠ DA SE SMEJEŠ 004

Oktobar 2019 , treća noć

Sinoć, kad sam sišla iz njene sobe,  krenem da pišem ovo i izgubim predstavu o vremenu, i  tek vidim da je pola jedan i da mi se užasno spava . Ovde je inače mrak od osam sati.  Noći su  vlažne i   hladne za ovo doba godine. Zaspala sam za tren. Iz sna me probudi kućni telefon  koji zvrcka  što znači da me Frau  baba zove.

"O  jebemusunce! I mesec  koji  moj sad oće, samo što sam legla"  I pravim se da ne čujem, ali ona besomučno zvoni. I ustanem ja. Šta ću, natučem  majcu i  pantalone pa  odem na sprat da vidim  gde gori.

-What do you need ?  -  Pitam ja, a jedva gledam. ( Šta ti treba ?)

-  I need šnaps ! - ( RAKIJE MI DAJ !)

" ŠNAPS ?! U OVO DOBA NOĆI? ŠNAPS TE JEBO!  OĆEŠ ŠNAPS?  ŠNAPS IT IS!!!  SAD ĆEŠ DOBIT ŠNAPS! "

Samo sam podigla obrve, uzela  pljoskicu sa stola  i odem u kujnu i nalijem  je iz itarske flaše,do vrha. 

Odnesem babi u sobu šnaps   - kad ona  zaprepašćeno:  – THIS IS TOO MUCH! -  ( OVO JE MNOGO )

"Ma teraj se bre  u pičku materinu , šta sad oćeš  da idem u drakstor da ti kupim unuče ???" 

- You do not have to drink  it all -  Ne moraš sve da popiješ -  rekoh   i okrenem se na peti i vratim se u krevet.

Još je bila noć kad je kućni telefon opet zvonio.  Pogledam na sat ono sedam sati  - a mrklica napolju ...  Tražila je  jutarnji šnaps.  Ponovo sam nalila punu pljosku iz iste flaše.

I naravno od spavanja više nije bilo ništa, ležala sam još malo i ustala  da kuvam sebi kafu.  

Babe nema iz sobe.   "Pa težak je hengover od pola litra  šljivovice ..   i ja ne bi mogla da ustanem kad bi to sve sasula u sebe ."  

Ona inače  uveče spremi   380 grama  rakije  - bruto doduše  , staklena  pljoskica  i  plastična flašica  imaju neku težinu, ali baba rokne najmanje pet rakija za veče  i to joj je doza  za "guten šlaf"  da može  da zaspi.  Ja sam mislila da me moja prethodnica zeza kad mi je to pričala da baba pije  rakiju da bolje spava.   Uveče se obeznani, bolje rečeno,  a inače  ima punu  natkasnu lekova i u kujni.  Jedan kuhinjski element je krcat kutijama s lekovima,  kapima, preparatima. Nije mi palo na pamet da baba može da rikne od te kombinacije, ali valjda  lekove pije  po receptu, ne pije ih više nego što treba ...

Ali sve u kombinaciji sa rakijom ???

Ipak se nisam previše udubljivala u to. - Želiš rakije ?  Izvoli. Tvoje zdravlje nije moja briga, samo me pusti da spavam ko čovek. -

 U neko doba  oko 11 sati  pojavljuje se baba  sa vunenom kapom na glavi:

- Aaoooh  I have pain !!! I am not feeling  well.  -  Imam bolove, nije mi dobro.  

"Ajdeee ?" 

-You gave  me to much alchohol  this morning !  You should pour to me  one half of a glass . ( Dala si mi previše alkohola jutros. Trealo je da mi sipaš samo pola čašice.)

"Pa ja sam ti kriva sad ???"

- You asked for it !  You wake me up and asked for  the šnaps! 

( Pa ti si tražila alkohol. Probudila si me i tražila rakije! )

-But you gave me  full botle of 42 % , I needed  38 %   it was  to strong for me. -  i drži se za glavu. Dala sam joj  rakiju od 42 % alkohola umesto od 38% koju ona pije.

"Ma da ..  ta od  38 prsent je  šumadijski čaj, bozica. Ne bi te bolela glava sad. Sram me bilo da me sram bilo."

I baba neće da komunicira , otišla u kupatilo, sedi tamo, puši, sluša muziku i drži se za glavu, čeka da je prođe.  Vrata od kupatila su ostala otvorena, pa sam mogla da vidim. Razmišljam  čime se leči mamurluk i pitam je da li hoće malo soka.

-Najn , danke. - ( Neću, hvala )

"Ponuđena, kao počašćena. Ako nećeš, ne moraš."  Rasonica ovde ne postoji, ni kao ideja.

Popušila je paklu  cigareta u kupatilu, a inače zatvara vrata od dnevne sobe gde inače puši da joj ne ide dim u hodnik i spavaću sobu.

......

Na red je došo ručak. Juče smo iz kupovine donele neke  spremljene ćufte, pakovanje  nešto manje od kila  i ja vidim na tacni jedna ćufta  a  plastika od ćufti prazna na stolu.

„ Dal je moguće da je pojela sve ćufte sinoć? Ili jutros ?" Ne mogu da verujem. Inače jede vrlo malo.  Pitam je šta će za ručak – ona oće ćufte  - ali ih zove frigadele.

"Pa gde da ti nađem ćufte sad  kad ono pakovanje prazno?" 

- In the  refrigerator!  They are frozen. -  Stavila ih je u zamrzivač - kaže baba.  

" Ooooo", laknu mi, ali samo za trenutak, jer ona hoće nove ćufte, ne te iz zamrzivača, nego da joj spremim nove od  melvenog mesa koje smo takođe kupile.  

I onda nastaje nova agonija ... Krećemo da zajedno spremamo ručak dok mi ona objašnjava  kako da napravim ćufte   a da ispadnu ćufte kakve ona voli i  to  zašta smatra da su ćufte, kao i na način kako ona misli da se prave.

- You do not know how to make   hšhazešfvasesfoaijfi -  nisam odmah zapamtila frigadele.  Kaže mi da ja ne umem da spremim ćufte.

-I know,  but I do not know if you will like it  my way ?   I put onions in that.-   Umem, ali  ne znam da li će da ti se svide. Ja stavljam crni luk u to.

-Yes  , onions. One  oniion is good.  -  Nema ništa protiv crnog luka. Onda   natoči vruću vodu  u šoljicu i potopi parče tosta , pa ga  ocedi  od vode.

Za to vreme ja je pitam  kolike hoće da joj budu ćufte. Zahvatim kašikom  malo mlevenog mesa i pokažem joj to kao primer. Ona me gleda ko debila i kaže: -  HALF - POLA. Ja prepolovim  ono iz kašike i pitam je:-This much ? -    Ovoliko ?

 Ona nemoćno sleže ramena  - Noooo, it is too dificult with you ..  Bibi has spoiled me .. and you do not know anything.

 -  Neee,  preteško je s tobom. Bibi  je mene razmazila kao malo dete a ti ništa ne znaš.

I tek mi pokaže rukom  na pola  pakovanja mesa - da od toga oće ćufte !!!

"Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaa!   Pa lepo  kaži  baba !"  Ona je ladno mislila da ja oću da pravim ćufte od pola kašike mlevenog!! Verovatno i deluje debilski :)

 I onda  ja dovršim operaciju  pravljenja ćufti,  isposlujem  cutting  board za  onions  , dasku za sečenje luka- koji sam naseckala na naj-klajne parčiće   i  napravila smesu  za ćute.

- Rukama ili kašikom ? - pitam pre nego što se dohvatim da mesim meso.

-  By hands, it is ok -  kaže - može rukama.

-  Where is oil ?- pitam dalje ja.    

Baba je ospice dobila odavno i svako novo pitanje je izluđuje , ali  njena kujna samo izgleda  obično ko naše kujne , ali tu vreba milijardu opasnosti  da nešto nisi stavio gde mu je mesto  ili nedaj Bože svemirske katastrofe da ti kaplje voda ili prska zejtin iz tiganja. A  tajno sklonište za krpe još nisam otkrila.

Ćufte se prže na  malo ulja, tj nekoliko kapi.

 "Ma da .. važi na garaži!"  Sunem ja još,  kad je baba izašla da može to lepo da se  isprži. Inače se  u tom  skupocenom,  toliko posebno čuvanom i održavanom teflonskom tiganju  pljeskavice prže u lebdećem položaju kako se ne bi  teflon  izgebao,  jer kad bi videla  belu  reckavu liniju verovatno bi dobila infarkt momentalno. Pljeskavice  se obrću  silikonskim  nekim predmetom  koji je  neprirodan i veštački do  gađenja , ali  nečujno sam se pomagala  viljuškom da se  jebene ćufte ne raspadnu kad ih budem  okretala tim predmetom.

Uz ćufte se jede  boranija  nepoznate sorte. Mahune su  veličine lenjira za geometriju, onog  od  30 cm, zelena, nikad videla u životu.  To se kuvalo petnaest minuta  po babinim instrukcijama  i sve vreme dok se sve to krčka na  štednjaku  strepim da se ne isprska šporet , što je katastrofa u najavi. Kad sam msilila da je  boranija kuvana , baba je utvrdila da je žilava. " Što li? Pitam se... Pa kad je tolka porasla verovatno se užilavila , jaranice."   I vratim ja to  da kuvam  na ringlu  još  petnes minuta. Valjda  se skuvalo, nema koske. Odnesem  babi parče  da  proba  ...

- Das ist okej ... You put in  here  some salt and  Holandeze. -   

-Dobro je sad. Stavi ovde malo soli i  Holandeze. -

"Salt je so, a šta je Holandeze? " Otvorim  frićider i pročitam sve naslove na flašicama u vratima  i nigde ne piše Holandeze. Znači,  opet moram  da odem u dnevnu sobu i da je pitam gde je taj holandeze, iako nemam pojma ni šta je to. 

Ona ode u kujnu i  iz frižider  sa police izvadi tetrapak,kao palvaka za kuvanje.

- AAAAAAAAAA  . Okej . - Kažem ja uz osmeh - slatko sa šlagom.

E sad treba da ocedim vodu iz boranije. I naravno iz šerpice mi ispadne  nekolko komada boranija u sudoperu., koja nije prljava  od silne higijene, ali  nije ni sterilna.

I de  ću s tim  uopšte?  Ako odem na terasu pored babe  do kante sa "bio otpadom" u ruci ima da me provali da bacam nešto, što sad nije  momenat da se baca.. Da zviznem kroz prozor komšije ima odma da me prijave u policaj. Da  šutnem u kantu za đubre ispod  sudopere,  baba  možda vrši popis  stvari u  kanti  pa će da vidi   boranije a onda sam najebala.  I sipam ja Holandeze u  šerpicu, posolim i promešam, pa pokupim one  komadiće boranije iz sudopere, pod vodom  operem pa ih ubacim nazad u šerpicu. Servirala sam  ćufte i boraniju na dva tanjira i odnela u dnevnu sobu za trpezarijski sto.

Konačno je baba dočekala svoje ćufte  sa  prilogom   i napucala se  da je zaboleo stomak, pa je tražila  čaj   mit anis  und kim.  Das ist gut  fur stomak.   Čaj od anisa i kima, koji je dobar za stomak.

"Ja ja ...  Zer  gut. "

Posle  ručka sam sišla u svoju sobu na odmor.  Baba valjda neće da me cima više do večere.

Samo me je jednom zvala telefonom  da joj zatvorim prozor u kujni  jer ne može da dohvati  i vidim  nasmejana je. Pitam je kako je , ona kaže : - Gut.  

"E vala bogu da si gut ...   Ćuuus."  i vratim se u svoju sobu na  mobilno  dopisivanje preko mesindžera sa  nekoliko dopisivača istovremeno. Ta aktivnost nema  milosti, jer kad jednom kreneš to da radiš  to ne može lako da se završi, a treba  priču o šnapsu istipkati  deset puta. Ispraznila mi se baterija zbog svega.

U neko doba čujem neko dolazi kod babe koja je pre toga  dugo telefonirala.

Mislila  sam da se žali na mene .. i  gotova je stvar, dobiću otkaz  sto posto. Ali sam se trudila da me  dočj šprehenzi odozgo ne dotiče  i  nastavila sam da dopisujem.

Posle nekog vremena  vrataranja ,  razgovora na nemačkom ,  kome  temu prema  intonaciji nisam mogla da odredim, dal je razgovor ljutit  ili nešto slično, ali  kao što rekoh – ni ne tiče me se. Ako im trebam nek me zovu, ja sama da se penjem gore neću, samo da me iskuliraju.

Onda čujem da neko silazi niz stepenice  s kerom  koji sitno cupka šapicama po drvenim stepenicama   od kojih druga odozdo škripi.   

Nok, nooook!  . Kuc kuc !  -  Čujem ispred vrata  i pojavljuje se  Nemica , nasmejana,  kod mene u sobi.

To je Sabina, žena koja je čuvala babu  dve godine pre nego što  su počele Srpkinje da je čuvaju ...došla je da mi da instrukcije i da mi pokaže  šta  mi  je nepoznato.   

Ufff, pade mi kamen sa srca, ja reko došla da mi očita neku bukvicu, kad ono sasvim suprotno. Šta ti je navika da očekuješ najgori mogući scenario u svakom slučaju.  

I ta Sabina  govori  engleski  30 posto, ali se razumemo. Pozvala me da  se popnem gore kod njih.  I ja odem, kad ono  i baba nasmejana, sve šoon... bite šonn...   klasse ...   NATURLIH.     

Baba nije gladna. Čudo   bi bilo da jeste.  Popismo kafu sa  Sabine.

Bibi  je u međuvremenu javila da su joj Mađari napisali kaznu od 70 eura za prekoračenje od sedam dana za koliko je premašila dozvoljenih 90 za boravak u EU.  To je bio posebno traumatičan događaj i za babu i za nju, jer nije imala sreće da se nekako izvuče, nego je morala da uplati te pare kad je došla u Srbiju i imala muke da nađe banku koja će da joj promeni eure u forinte.   

.......

Onda je došlo vreme za šauer, moje tuširanje. Moram bre, da se konačno okupam, ovo mi je treći dan na  bebi vlažnim maramicama.

Inače  je baba mađioničar. Ona se sama kupa  a posle njenog kupanja  mi je prvi dan rekla :   

- You can clean the bathroom now.  ( možeš sada da počistiš )

"Pa suncemujebem šta da klin??? Kad  se sve cakli.  "

Kako baba uspe da se okupa  a kada suva ko barut  - ja  stvarno pojma nemam.  

Prvi dan kad sam stigla bila sam preumorna za  kupanje. Drugi dan sam videla to čudo od suvoće kupatila  pa  pretpostavljam da se i od mene to očekuje, ali ja pošto nemam natprirodne moći nisam odmah smela da se usudim da  uđem u taj hram  higijene  i da probam da se tušnem. Ali  večeras moram da se okupam pa kud puklo da puklo  i ako zbog šnapsa ne dobih otkaz  zbog kupanja sigurno oću, jer  da se okupam bez vode  ne bi umela, a  oni  to izgleda to rade .ili se kupaju na  neki  kompresor.  #jebemliga ...

I   baba mi ljubazno objasni gde imam sterilne peškire, preuredno sklopljene  i prepusti mi kupatilo  tj tuš kabinu.   Uđem ja  zaključam vrata i priđem uz tuš   -  koji u životu videla nisam   ...  nešto  kružno sa dijamantom u sredini i ručka odozdo. Tuš baterija normalno  zakačena  crevom za držač,  ali kako se sad ovaj tuš pušta ? Sve mu jebem da mu jebem .. Uvatim za ručku i  cimnem levo desno .... Ništa.  

Povučem prema sebi ...ono krene  - ali se  u isto vreme i dijamant  u obliku velikog dugmeta  RASPADNE NA SASTAVNE DELOVE A TA RUČKA ZVEKNE O  POD  TUŠ KADE !!!

TINUNINUTINUNINU. Baba je čula tresak i iz hodnika prestrašeno pita na nemačkom: - WAS IST PASIEREN???

Ja otvorim vrata i pokažem joj  metalnu ručku  koju sam podigla s poda ...

I čekam da me ustreli ...

-How did this  happened? Can you put it back?  Šta se desilo? Možeš li to da vratiš nazad?

-Yes, I will put it back.  Vratiću ga - kažem ja...Kad bi se zajebavali...  Kako da ga vratim nazad, kad mi deluje kao slomljeni čelični deo ili slomljena imitacija metala od tvrde plastike....  upičkumaterinu ...  ajde sad  KLIKNI... KLIKNI NAZAD... KLIKNI MOLIM TE KO BOGA, KLIKNI PLASTIČNA NAKAZO... KLIKNI BREEEE, ODE MI GLAVA... KLIKNI, GOVNO JEDNO... 

I u neko doba uspem da slložim sastavne delove u  kružne proreze, i da zakačim ručku negde unutra kako je valjda bilo a da  sve ne ispada napolje... i da klikne...  Pokupim peškire  i  odem u dnevnu sobu da kažem babi da sam vratila kako je bilo  i vratim se u sobu. Dosta mi je sranja za danas, tuširaću se sutra kad budem dobila instrukcije kako se pušta jebeni tuš. Ili možda kad odem kući.

Update:  Tuš je već bio slomljen, pa lepljen i  pušta se tako  kako sam i ja probala da ga pustim  pa se raspao...  

..........

Grrrrr, savršeno savršenstvo  nemačko...  bolesno perverzna pedanterija, sterilizacija  žvotnog prostora,  obožavanje đubreta   koje ima svoje praznike u mesecu kad ga đubretari konačno preuzimaju  u noćnim časovima, kao da je neka sekta u pitanju...  besomučno  razdvajanje  hartije od  folije,  tegle od flaša po bojama,  bio otpad , pičke materine,  a onda se isti taj  Nemac ili Nemica   zemljoše, upropasti i obeznani od alkohola u toj meri da se bukvalno upiša u krevet ...  I onda ja  treba da se pravim da to ne vidim,  a i pravila sam se  i nije mi tražila da joj  menjam posteljinu, samo sam  prema šemi sklopila jorgan   a čaršav nisam ni pipnula sem  za  krajeve  da ga zategnem.  Šon ... šon. Jebemvammateronunenormalnu. Od onolikog alkohola  ladno je mogla i da se usere u svoj krevet, ali  vala bogu pa nije .   

Razmišljam  da li je ovo sramota što pišem ??? Čija sramota? Koga treba da bude sramota?

Bakica  je u suštini  fina jedna osoba, ljubazna, dok je ne uhvate lutke pa pošandrca, kao sinoć kad je tražila  nešto po frižideru panično preturajući pakovanja  sa mesnim proizvodima. Pretpostavila sam da je nešto belo - wajs tražila ali ga nije našla pa je  besno napustila kujnu, a dotle je bilo sve  u najboljem redu posle šopinga u gradu.

[gmanwhore]

Sending this at like, 12 am because I can't sleep and I'm super proud of this, you can answer this ask whenever you please!!

Also I am so sorry for staying up later then I should have, I just had too much energy and couldn't sleep, thanks anti-depressants, really appreciate it/Sar. Anyways, love you so so much and I hope you had a good sleep and or day!!!! I love you a lot my little mantis!!!

I wrote a roleplay starter for my partner Ghost with an OC ship, Lilac x Reno, and a little context for their relationship: They're a bit of a toxic relationship, they broke up at some point, but they kept going back to one another, Lock is protective of Lilac which is why she's giving Reno the dirty look, also, yes, Lock plays electric guitar and sings in her free time, yippee, anyways, I wanted to show you the response because holy crap am I ever proud of it!!!

Also, yes, their dynamic is based around Ghost and Mine, which is why the song Bad Romance is heavily implied.

♡ 𝗕𝗔𝗗 𝗥𝗢𝗠𝗔𝗡𝗖𝗘 ¡! ♡

꒦꒷꒦꒷꒦꒷꒦꒷♡꒷꒦꒷꒦꒷꒦꒷꒦

⋆ ❱ He couldn't stay away from them. They were like an addiction and all Reno wanted to do was get high off of them. Off of their love. He couldn't get enough. They were a 𝑩𝒂𝒅 𝑹𝒐𝒎𝒂𝒏𝒄𝒆.

꒦꒷꒦꒷꒦꒷꒦꒷♡꒷꒦꒷꒦꒷꒦꒷꒦

⋆ ❱ Here he was, in his element, the music in the club blaring, people on the dance floor, dancing a little too close for comfort, people screaming over the music, crowds of people in the corners, the bartender talking it up with a hooker, people drunkenly slurring over their words and fighting, the lights flashing brightly, neon colors all around the club, but he only had his eye on one particular someone. He leaned back on the counter, smiling like a lovesick fool at them as they laughed and talked to their group of friends which consisted of Koi, Koju, and a few others. He swirled the whiskey in his cup and sighed, placing it on the counter and making his way over to Lilac, adjusting his undone suit, his baton lazily on his shoulder. He noticed Lock who was up on the stage, playing her guitar and singing, giving Reno a dirty look, causing Reno to cringe a little and hesitate to approach Lilac. He knew how rocky he and Lilac's relationship was and he really wanted to make amends, but Locks warning look wasn't helping him at all.

⋆ ❱ He sucked a deep breath in and exhaled, finally coming up behind Lilac and tapping them on the shoulder, putting on his famous cocky grin, leaning a little lazily to the side as he tilts his head to the side. However you could see a hint of nervousness in his eyes.

"Hey. Long time no see, huh?"

Ooooo, nice!

[rainsmediaradio]

Adekunle Gold & Simi - Look What You Made Me Do Lyrics

Adekunle Gold & Simi - Look What You Made Me Do Lyrics Verse 1 Look at me now, a victim of my pride I made a vow you’d never catch me falling Oh what a life, it caught me by surprise Now I dream of you and my heart is throbbing Chorus Look what you made me do Look what you made me do Fell on my face for you Look what you made me do Verse 2 Love at first sight, is it in my head? Cupid is asking, why are you running? So who is the stranger that’s in my bed? I didn’t want to, but I found my person o Chorus Look what you made me do Look what you made me do Fell on my face for you Look what you made me do Verse 3 Maybe we can hold this moment So I leave myself wide open You’re the one my heart has chosen Written in the stars, this romance Bridge Love me tender My forever Go together Salt and pepper I do the most for you 'Cause you’re the best for me baby Chorus Look what you made me do Look what you made me do Look what you made me do Look what you made me do Fell on my face for you Look what you made me do Outro Look at me now Koju Simi baby Cupid is asking, why are you running? Look what you made me do Look what you made me do Read the full article

[leviathanverse]

Chapter 3: Rotten Mission

You hummed happily as you sat on your bed. The sun had risen, and you were wide awake after your nice long rest. It felt good to sleep for a good solid eight hours. Your injuries felt a lot better after they had been treated by Koju. Still hurt but not as much before they had been properly treated.

" Y/n L/n. Please report to my office to receive something. Y/n L/n."

You groaned unhappily, your peaceful moment ruined by Sakura asking for your presence over the intercom. You sighed loudly, absolutely depressed that you had to go fetch your payment- which you had forgotten about last night.

" Please don't be another mission. Please don't be another mission."

You prayed to any God above to show you mercy, praying not to get another mission. Hopefully it wasn't a mission you'd get while getting paid! Maybe you were getting a promotion!

...

" You have another mission."

Your mouth was agape, left eye twitching as your brain tried to comprehend what Sakura just told you.

" There has been another sighting of Hunters bringing in cages to the Black Market in the Western Black Market. Your mission is to eliminate all the guards and hunters at once. If you see poachers, then eliminate the too."

Your brain was still processing each word that left her tongue. Another mission? After the one you had almost gotten killed in last night?! You felt your throat tighten as the urge to cuss at her in your original language grew. You held back, and calmed down, closing your mouth and sighed.

" When do I start?"

" Tonight. We need to help those poor things as soon as possible."

" ... I'll get ready so long."

You got up and bowed to her, stood straight up and collected your money.

" Chiyeko will prepare your equipment. He'll be at the weapon room."

You nodded and turned around and walked to the door, opened it and closed it after you exited the office. You walked back down the hallway to your room, grumbling about how it wasn't fair that you had done more missions than the the other assassins.

" Pourquoi j'ai plus de missions que ces connards?! J'ai fait 120 missions alors qu'ils n'en ont fait que 17!"

You were mad. It made you jealous that you had the most assassination missions than the other older members of the HQ. Was it because you were rescued? Because you were only ten when you the massacre happened? You didn't know the reason for why you got more missions than the older and more experienced members of the HQ.

You reached your room and opened your door. You didn't bother to close it, too angry to do so. You went to your closet and opened it, grabbed a different outfit for your new mission.

" Why do we need different outfits when assassinating our targets in different locations? Ugh. I shouldn't let that bother me."

You closed your closet and went to the bathroom. You needed a nice cold shower before you even got ready to do your mission. Hopefully it wouldn't be as difficult as you thought.

...

You were dressed and packed some important stuff like a med kit and some of your poison tranquiler darts and blowgun. You weren't taking a risk on this mission. It never hurt to take extra weapons with you, now did it?

You zipped your backpack and grabbed the strap and slung it over your shoulder. You looked around, looking for anything that you might have forgotten to pack. You saw nothing and turned around. You walked out of your room and closed the door, locking it.

" I hate my life."

You put your keys on the hanger next to your door for Kumori if he wanted to clean your room if he ever so wanted to. Sighing, you walked down the hallway and towards the weapon room. It was quite literally three doors left of your room.

A male in his early forties waved at you as he entered the weapon room. You waved back as you followed him inside.

" I see you are on another mission?"

" Unfortunately, Chiyeko. Boss must really hate me if she keeps giving me missions."

" I love your enthusiasm, Y/n. But we must focus on your equipment and weapons rather than have a conversation about shit."

Typical Chiyeko. Always ruining the nice atmosphere. You only nodded your head, agreeing with him.

" Here. Packed all the equipment and weapons you'd need for this mission. Should help with making it smooth."

He handed you another bag, but it was specifically made to attach to other bags in order to make carrying them easier. You took the bag from him and held it, giving a curt nod.

" See you after this. Hopefully."

He only chuckled after you had turned around and left. It was a joke in his eyes, but in your eyes? It was serious. You rushed to the garage and opened the door before going inside and went to your car, taking your backpack off and tossed them in the backseat. You quickly got in and started the engine, reversing and drove off. You hoped that the mission would be easy. You drove on the road and saw a forest in the distance. Maybe you could use that as a place to hide your car, out of sight from the poachers and hunters alike.

You drove towards the forest, making sure to not make it look suspicious that a random car was driving towards a forest. That would have caused suspicion among any that were nearby. Thankfully, no one was out and about. Making your idea and technique easier to use.

You made it to the forest, driving through the thicket like a madman trying to fistfight a grizzly bear. Heh. That would've been funny. The bad feeling came again, but you shook it off as just the forest being creepy.

You parked your car out of sight but close to where you wanted it to be before getting out of the vehicle and grabbed your stuff. Your gut only twisted even more as the feeling grew. You ignored it, however and made your way to the border of the forest. Now you had to wait for nightfall and people to sleep. You sat down and began to wait for nightfall to come, wanting to welcome it with open arms while you assassinate the hunters and free the caged creatures.

...

It was nightfall, and you got up. You were ready to beat some was like always. Hey! Maybe you could even rob the targets and use their valuables to buy food! Oh- that would be amazing!

You jogged towards the open field, making sure to stay hidden and out of sight from anyone that was still awake. You had to be careful, as there were dogs. The furry four legged animal patrolling with its human guard. You quickly went behind a shed that had come into view. You were close to the town and Black Market.

You sighed and reached into your backpack's side pocket, pulling out a sleeping gas grenade. You pulled the metal part and threw it at the two, the effects working like a charm within twenty three seconds.

You quickly ninja moved your way through the Black Market like a bullet. Your outfit camouflaged you from any eyes that we're on patrol. You saw the area where the creatures were and got the back that Chiyeko packed and pulled out a handful of tiny devices. You put them down and they came to life, immediately going towards the cages and went to the locks. You quickly made your escape, but it only caused you to be spotted.

" HEY! Stop right there!"

" Oh my fucking job- you have got to be kidding me."

You ran out in the open and towards the forest, intending to use the trees as an advantage.

" I said stop!"

" Shoot!"

A gun went off, and it missed your head by an inch. Not good. You scanned the area and saw no routes to use or have any plans form in your head. You heard another gun go off and a hot white pain spread in your leg. You stumbled, which was unfortunately at the edge of a hill. You rolled down, branches and other stuff tore your outfit and scratched your skin.

You kept rolling down, the pain in your leg had only worsened each time it hit something hard your landed on its side.

" There! After them!"

You kept rolling before coming to a stop. You knew it wouldn't do any good to your now injured thigh, but you got up and ran, limping as you did so.

" Fuck off, you low lives!"

You heard something massive land and the screams of the guards and barking of dogs. Whatever it was, it was making them its meal. You tripped over a root, falling face first onto the ground. You were so tired, so ready to let go. But... what about your friends? Sakura? Hīrā? Everyone back at HQ? You gained some strength and got up, about to take a step before the creature that had attacked the men landed in front of you.

" You have got to be kidding me."

It was a dragon, and a massive one at that. It snarled and glared, sharp teeth exposed as it growled at you. You moved your arm to grab that weird handle that stuck out of your backpack. It charged at you, and you pulled it out.

" You have got to be joking. A fucking frying pan?!"

You held the object in front of you and dodged the attack, the pain in your leg throbbed but you did not want to turn into a treat for a beast as majestic as it. It skidded a bit, and you quickly took off. It roared behind you, chasing you.

" Fucking great. I should've brought a notebook and pen to write my last words."

The adrenaline pumped in your system, and you moved. Like, you actually moved. Not just running and got tired, but running with adrenaline that gave you the needed strength to move it like it was your last time. Maybe it would be.

You fell forward, tumbling into a hole that was rabbit sized to the beast, screaming in agony as you felt your shoulder dislocate. You only kept going, not stopping until you rolled into a space. Whatever made this den had abandoned it a long time ago.

You whimpered, the adrenaline wore off and all you felt was pain spread across your body. Your ribs, sternum and everything hurt. Not to mention the shoulder you managed to dislocate on your way down. You cried, something you barely did. But this- this was scary.

" I'm sorry... I'm so sorry..."

You choked, flashbacks of when you were the only one to have survived the massacre all those twelve years ago, the only survivor of a town that had more than hundreds of lives. The blood, the screams of women and men alike from your old home, the pleas to be spared- it flashed before your eyes like a movie. You regretted ever entering the forest. It belonged to the dragon. The predator of the very forest you had entered and parked your car.

You didn't have the chance to tell everyone goodbye. You didn't get to see them for the last time.

" So this is what it's like to get assassinated? Heh... How the tables have turned..."

It wasn't funny.

It wasn't a way to escape your predicament or the reality of it. There was absolutely no humour in your words, despite there being a sense of only a tiny bit of sarcasm in the sentences you spoke.

" It's like being in the massacre all over again! Haha! This is so ironic!"

But you didn't smile or laugh. You knew that it was the end for you if the dragon dug you out from the den you had fallen and tumbled into. The primal fear and instinct told you to get up and run-! To try and live another day by running for your life! To be able to Atleast try and survive! But you were so exhausted, the fear and injuries didn't help at all to keep you awake. You closed your eyes and fell unconscious from fear and pain, maybe it was the last time that you were on the earth.

Previous <-●-> Next

[izradawebshopa]

SEO - što je to?

Što je SEO optimiziranje internet stranice za tražilice?

Kratica SEO izvedena je iz engleskih riječi Search Engine Optimization - Optimiziranje za tražilice. Ova kratica je u upotrebi u izvornom obliku i u drugim ne-engleskim jezicima. Optimiziranje internet stranice za tražilice je proces odabira najprikladnijih ciljanih fraza ključnih riječi povezanih s vašom web lokacijom. To osigurava visoko rangiranje vaše web stranice u tražilicama. Tako da kada netko pretražuje određene fraze, vaša web stranica bude na vrhu. To u osnovi uključuje fino podešavanje sadržaja vaše stranice zajedno s HTML i meta oznakama. A također uključuje i odgovarajući proces izgradnje poveznica. Među popularnijim tražilicama su Google, Yahoo, MSN Search, Ask Jeeves, Safari, Microsoft Edge, Opera... Koje su metode i algoritmi rangiranja stranica? Tražilice drže svoje metode i algoritme rangiranja u tajnosti kako bi dobile zasluge za pronalaženje najvrjednijih rezultata pretraživanja. I kako bi spriječile neželjene stranice da začepe te rezultate. Tražilica može koristiti stotine čimbenika pri rangiranju popisa pri čemu se sami čimbenici i težina koju svaki nosi mogu neprestano mijenjati. Algoritmi se mogu toliko razlikovati da bi web-stranica koja je rangirana broj 1 u određenoj tražilici mogla biti rangirana kao broj 200 u drugoj tražilici. Nove stranice ne moraju biti "podnesene" tražilicama da bi bile navedene. Jednostavna veza s dobro uspostavljene stranice natjerat će tražilice da posjete novu stranicu i počnu pregledavati njezin sadržaj. Za to može proći nekoliko dana pa čak i tjedana. Od upućivanja poveznice s tako uspostavljene stranice dok svi glavni pauci tražilice počnu posjećivati i indeksirati novu stranicu. Sve to uključuje izraz SEO.

Tvrtke za seo optimiziranje Možda niste u mogućnosti istraživati i birati ključne riječi te raditi na vlastitom poretku u tražilici. To znači da ćete možda htjeti unajmiti nekoga da radi s vama na tim pitanjima. Tvrtke za marketing i promociju na tražilicama pogledat će plan za vašu stranicu i dati preporuke za povećanje rangiranja na tražilici i prometa na web stranici. Ako želite, oni će također pružiti stalne konzultacije i izvješćivanje za praćenje vaše web stranice i davanje preporuka za uređivanje i poboljšanja. Kako bi se održao protok prometa na vašoj web stranici i visoko rangiranje vaše tražilice. Obično stručnjaci za optimiziranje tražilica rade s vašim web dizajnerom tako da se svi aspekti dizajna razmatraju u isto vrijeme. Pronaći pravu tvrtku za SEO optimiziranje stranica ponekad i nije jednostavan posao. Na tržištu nema puno osoba koje znaju odraditi potpuno optimiziranje stranice. Da je to tako govore i činjenice u vezi Zakona o pristupačnosti mrežnih stranica i programskih rješenja za pokretne uređaje tijela javnog sektora. Ovaj Zakon donesen je u veljači 2019. godine i obvezao je sve javne institucije (državni sektor) da svoje internet stranice usklade sa Zakonom. Do sada je to djelomično učinilo možda 20% obveznika, bez obzira na prekoračene zakonske rokove i moguće sankcije. Radi se o tome da je u Zakon kao obveza implementiran cijeli SEO uz još neke druge dodane elemente. Jednostavno nema na raspolaganju dovoljno ljudi koji imaju potrebno znanje za ovo odraditi. Koje su prednosti optimiziranja internet stranice? Oglašavanje u tražilicama vaše tvrtke ili posla kojim se bavite, brz je i efikasan način dobivanja pozornosti. I vaš web shop će prije početi prodavati proizvode. Ali to traje samo u onom vremenu za koje ste platili oglašavanje. Nasuprot ovome, optimiziranje stranice daje nešto sporije ali zato dugotrajnije rezultate. Naime, ako se vaša internet stranica pozicionira među prvih 10 mjesta u Google tražilici (prva stranica Googla) za vama bitne ključne riječi, više nije potrebno plaćati oglašavanje. Tada imate stalno besplatno oglašavanje u tražilicama. U koliko imate dodatnih pitanja, rado ćemo vam pomoći. Read the full article