#BUT IT BOTHERS ME IF I DONT AT LEAST TRY TO | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

boxofthings · 2 years

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worst part of writing big ass fics is the pacing + timeline organization. also the logistics of certain events that goes on if you're writing about a slightly complex scenario because now you're stuck with researching how shit works

#istg this fic will kill me before i finish it but i just cant stop #shadow!roach brainrot is real and i cannot prevent the effects #plotting out missions for cod fics is so damn annoying because i dont want them to sound unrealistic #or just plain wrong even though i dont exactly write my cod fics with military accuracy in mind #i ended up researching the entire timeline of the og and reboot timeline stemming from every hostile character and organization #to every little event that took place #AND i looked up every fictional country that exists in the cod universe just so i knew which locations i could place the characters in #on top of all of that im still tryna figure out the logistics of task forces in general and how theyre organized #pls this is killing me like its not even a big deal if i dont accurately portray a special ops unit or a military environment #BUT IT BOTHERS ME IF I DONT AT LEAST TRY TO

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puppyeared · 2 months

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learning abt friendship decay and "not reaching out to your friends for months at a time unprompted is not neurotypical behaviour" has me feeling a certain way

#experiencing some BIG FEELINGS OVER THIS REVELATION #listen i have never ever been bothered abt not seeing someone in a while or making time to talk to them bc in my mind its like not thst muc #time has passed. i mean it with every fibre of my being that when im like 'oh its ok even though we havent talked in a while and have our #own things going on it doesnt mean we're not friends anymore since we left things on a good note 8 months ago' i sincerely believe that #and for the longest time i just thought everybody makes peace with it at some point and not automatically assuming the other person doesnt #wanna talk to me anymore or smth. my longest lasting friendships are with ppl who work the same way i just thouhght that was normal #whatever organ everybody has that makes them reach out to their friends and plan hang outs i probably dont have it #i was already hesitant to ask out Alex bc i spend almost every waking hour doing smth that isnt talking to ppl unless they happen to be in #the vicinity. and at first it was bc i planned on making sure i had everything set up so i dont get stressed out and do it one at a time #but then i find out theres a friendship decay mechanic? and after dating and marrying someone you lose -10 friendship points for every #day u dont talk to them?? actually ive probably been losing friendship points this whole time without knowing bc of this?????#and i notice a lot of my own habits are also reflected in how i play bc ive been avoiding getting close to pierre and marnie since its more #of a professional relationship. like i know theyre npcs but im approaching it the way i would in real life its fucking nuts #i think its a little relieving im playing /as/ a character than myself bc as im playing im just making up little interactions in my head #than approaching things the way i would myself so it takes a bit of the stress off trying to put myself in there as a spectator. but well #being in a relationship demands a certain amount of energy even more so when theyre things that already take up energy on its own #like making time to talk to your partner and make sure they know theyre loved. i dont always have energy to put all my mental focus into it #and this is true for real life so im not really bothered by not dating anyone. but when its a game and i want my character to be with someo #and i know its fully optional and i know i could just apply the same logic to this i dont /want/ to. sometimes i want to experience #the same things other people do at least to a certain degree without the same emotional andmental stakes #no offense krobus #yapping #stardew #stardew valley #puppy plays sdv #sdv #this game has me by the ankles man

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notachair · 6 months

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Since atla is again having an extra surge of popularity, I'm shooting my shot:

[ID: (Rest of image description in alt). At the bottom of the image sits the text: "Zuko: Okay. Well, I can't remember how it starts, but the punchline is "leaf me alone, I'm bushed."" ID end].

Did we ever find out what the setup for this joke was? I feel kinda haunted by it. If not- anyone wanna make their best or worst guesses?

edit: I now know what "I'm bushed" mean, but go ahead anyway 👍

haunted thoughts in tags ↓

#atla #the way I was early out for this next surge in popularity 🤗 I was in a different phase by 2020 #it's not like it haunts me day and night but it does bother me thinking back on it. please tell me I'm not the only one 🧍‍♂️#I'll have to reblog the 'closure is a myth' post jk #what kind... of joke is it? leaf pun on leave i get. I'm bushed however I dont get. it implies the punchline sayer is a bush at least I #think. but what prompts the 'i am bushed' I dont get. is it not contextual? is it a phrase ive not connected like 'leaf me alone'?#is there anotger layer between leaf and bush? again what kind of joke (social:joke purpose. what is funny? only pun?) + (in-joke set up)?#is it about the kind of bush it is? is it between two plants? the plant & someone picking on the plant like a teamaker collecting?#is it about a plant that has grown into bush and thus (somethingsomething)?? is it not a plant at all? other elements? iroh *what*.#if the creators actually had a setup in mind- I fear it will be lame. but yet I am haunted #it must have cracked someone up for him to try relay it. (set in term of endearment here) 🧍‍♂️👈 *poking him*#either way. me 🤝 zuko @ being bad at remembering & relaying jokes 😁👍#at least in that instance anyway #I mainly stick to irony & sarcasm. running along with an mistaken assumption or replying w something silly & blowing it out of proportions.#puns if I'm lucky. ect. fun when I can reference it later tho I try not to overdo it. not like I'll likely remember it for too long anyway #now to lay in wajt see if anything happens....#avatar the last airbender #zuko #atla zuko #a:tla #my rambles #its lie and not lay is it not.....

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snezfics-n-shit · 11 months

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#this meme has been going through my head for a bazillion years lol #i love to interact and then it hits me that im probably bothering you guys #plus the current popular stuff I am sadly so unfamiliar with #when i was younger i would gravitate to my own interests when i was unfamiliar with other topics and it got on peoples nerves a lot #and i completely understand that so i dont wanna repeat those mistakes #its just like a game of pingpong of me talking too much and me hiding under my desk bc i feel like im bothering everyone #also like the last time it was p much confirmed i was being annoying i cried for like two hours bc my fears were realized haha #and when a line is drawn for me i kinda like to stay at least 2ft away from wherever that line is just to be safe #you gotta like throw a cookie attached to a fishing line to get me closer to the line lol #because i will seriously be way too cautious otherwise #im trying to get more brave though im just kinda like my cat who heard a noise in the bathroom cabinet #and now he refuses to go near it #being mindful of others feelings and respecting their boundaries is super important to me #and sometimes that boxes me in a bit

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andoutofharm · 1 year

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you might be thinking ‘wow you always have a lot to say about what every single song and every single album Means To You’ and the response to that is that i listen to a LOT of fall out boy and i take ALL of it personally

hope that helps

#looking back i realized i do this a lot like saying omg im an abap girl AND a mania girl AND a srar girl #or just. idk having random shit to say about what all of the 8ball songs mean To Me and .#i promise im not trying to make things About Me or whatever #i just have never been normal about anything in my life least of all fall out boy and their music #no idea if anyone actually was bothered by this but i dont want to be annoying i just Feel a lot of things about All of their music. ALL #ANYWAY. 27. what thee fuck

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moeblob · 8 months

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New OCs

(briefly, humans and supernatural beings have to team up for building better relations with each other and all the supernaturals can shapeshift and take on human appearances but also have their 'original form'.)

OK so I was GOING to draw fanart today - I had a fun idea and everything! But health anxiety (and anti-anxiety meds) wore me out so I kinda .... slogged through OCs as a treat to me. I am going to go to the doctor tomorrow so HOPEFULLY it's all okay.

#my characters #also kite is the worst socially and says things he thinks are surely fitting for a human conversation #but ends up insulting grady with 99% of the comments and that makes grady not fond of him #but then grady is like super pleasant to others and doesnt know how to act around kite and flubs a lot too #its a disaster and the twins are like oh no this is painful #mr tengu that was so tacky you cant say that to a human #mr tengu you cant DO that to a human STOP BEING LIKE THIS #while callum is just like wow this is hilarious thanks for bothering my younger brother its adding character to his life #and kite is stressed because thats the least encouraging thing to hear ever thank you v much hes TRYING to adapt #but also kite isnt his real name and he doesnt know squat about humans BUT he knows they have the internet #and so hes like well the problem is i dont want to actually say my name to you all because what if i am Online (TM)#and so he asks for a new name and then is like he should name me - the tiny one who wants to kick my ass should name me #so grady is like ....... nooooo...... dont............ and then suggests kite bc he's done google research #and kite is a type of bird and according to wikipedia has some familiarity to tengu so therefore yeah #and kite is like !!!!!! DOES HE ! KNOW THINGS ! and happily accepts the slightly researched name while the other humans #are like grady stop that is bullying the poor guy leave him alone pick a normal name!#anyway not drawn yet but there is a human guy partner for the twins and he immediately is like perfect #i know which is which lets go out and explore the human world for your research #and they dont understand how he knows them apart so fast and none of the other humans seem to tell em apart #but then none of the humans are shocked at the guy who knows so the girls are like sir howst do you know #and hes just v casual oh right yeah younger identical twin sisters - i have Practice ! and they are endeared to him haha #anyway if you read all those tags ty #and yes in his tengu form he does actually have the long nose please do not be mad #i just dont draw noses normally and im too tired to practice rn so #i only drew the second one today anyway - the first pic was done a couple days ago but i didnt wanna post on main #but then here i am posting on main #im sorry

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wormchaser · 3 days

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you are complaining about complaining too much while complaining about the fact that maybe people dont like you because you complain too much while complaining about being alone. just stop complaining and do something about it. talk to people. reach out. dont just wait for someone to come to you first.

i have tried reaching out to different people in the past year or so but it never works. i understand its my own fault for letting relationships decay because of my own insecurities and issues but that doesn't mean i can just will myself to think or believe different things about myself. it's a self fulfilling prophecy ; i think people don't like me so i don't reach out so people don't like me etc . i am sure you do not want to hear me list all the things i want to say in response so i will put them in the tags.

#every time i try to reach out or talk to someone it goes nowhere. i dont have any social skills anymore and have no clue how to keep a #conversation going. half the time even when i do people stop replying to me. which is fine theydont owe me a reply but still feels likeshit #when i tried to make one new irl friend it just didn't work because they have better options for friends. we spoke occasionally but never #messaged online like ever and would only talk when we happened to be in the same place. i tried multiple times to organize a time to hangou #none of which came to pass. i dont understand why this one didn't work because i thought this person was interested in being my friend but #i guess i was wrong or thought they were more interested than they really were.#i have a problem with reaching out anyway which has been a problem i have had since i was like 11. reaching out to people first doesnt come #easily to me - in the beginning when i was a lot younger i didn't want to bother people with my presence & thought if i were to come to #someone first they would feel pressured into talking to me when they didn't want to. this is stupid of course. but has still not left me as #something i feel is very core to the way i act today. waiting for someone to come to me first feels like my only option because i do not #know how to reach out effectively (my evidence being i have failed every time i have tried) & i am convinced people dont like me in the #first place and do not want me to approach them.#i dont really even know who to reach out to in the first place. my world is extremely narrow. the number of people i know has shrunk #significantly and my standing in their eyes collectively has also shrunk significantly in the past few years. i feel like every person i #was once friends with wants nothing to do with me. i feel as if i have burned every bridge possible.#when it comes to the fact i complain all the time . which i know of course is annoying. its because i cant find any kind of joy in anything #i do or see or whatever. nothing makes me happy - i only see things to complain about. all stimulus seems grating and the world seems #specifically catered to make me miserable. all i can really do is complain. i treat this blog like a stream of consciousness and when most #of that consciousness is occupied with how much i hate being alive the blog will mostly be complaining. its a vicious cycle lol .#anyway . i guess the key theme is low self esteem begets low self esteem in many ways. mental illness begets mental illness.#i am not really saying this to anyone least of all to you anon. i just felt compelled to recount i guess for myself the reasons that came #to mind for why i am like this. i am talking to myself here

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triptychofvoids · 6 months

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i know you say youre not a rp acc and not kin, but i wanted to ask, your art of medic, are you depicting yourself? should i refer to medic in your art as you? example "i love how you drew yourself in this"? idkk i dont wanna poke around but i wanted to be sure im referring to you correctly??

this is a good question, just one that im not sure i will ever be able to give a satisfying answer to. i did answer something similar here that im definitely not an rp account but im neutral on kinning, because the term seems so broad that i cant say for certain if thats whats going on. maybe! or maybe not! hmm and then my art of medic.. yes it is depicting myself. but i also recognize that medic is a fictional character, so it doesnt bother me if people refer to medic as medic! im just drawing him, it doesnt have to be more complicated than that. if that makes sense. its all one in the same to me so it doesnt matter and you dont have to worry about it :]€

#its in the same way i will make posts talking about medic sometimes or will sometimes answer asks in third person #im referring to myself because thats me but #i do understand that hes also fictional character from the video game Team Fortress 2 #and i know people have their own interpretations and ocs and whatever else #i try not to think about it too hard or i will only give myself a headache #tl;dr dont worry about changing the way you refer to medic on my posts i know what people are talking about #i will know what you mean #it does not bother me #i think i would actually find it Worse if someone refered to Only my drawings of medic as 'you/yourself'#but then talked about every other medic thing as normal #is this comprehensible...? i hope so #it feels like there was another thing i was going to say also.. but ive already forgotten it oh well #see i dont bite at least not at first #thank youu for the ask my friend!!#its just a difficult question to answer because i dont fully understand what is happening either #there has to be some way for me to explain this better i just havent found it yet #THE POINT IS thank you for asking and i dont mind please talk about things as you normally would. smiles ^^#the doc is in #replies from the void

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fated-normal-767 · 5 months

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love my irls to death but sometimes it’s like looking into a mystical pool to see me 2 years ago. and sometimes I think ‘if I could give me from 2 years ago some advice I’d know exactly what to say to him’ and then I give said advice to my irls and they go ‘no im not doing that lmao.’ I am trying to help you here. I am trying to help you skip 2 years of incredibly difficult realisations and recovery. and yet they all continue to refuse any help I offer. Well Fine. not my job I guess.

#‘uggghh my life sucks’#DRINK WATER EAT GOOD FOOD FUCKING RESPECT YOURSELF EVEN SLIGHTLY FOR 5 SECONDS #DONT TREAT YOUR ISSUES AS REASONS TO BE DICKS ON PURPOSE TO ANYONE TRYING TO HELP YOU #‘lmao why would that help at all im not even going to bother’ PLEASE. PLEASE.#I learnt it the hard way . please don’t.#’well how did YOU get better’#I had all my support systems ripped away from me and learnt it was recovery or dying .#and then finally realised I wanted to live. at least for small things. I can make soup tomorrow I can make art I can live.#and I’d rather YOU DIDNT HAVE TO SUFFER TO REALISE THIS.#christtttttt……

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espy-heart · 5 months

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new icon

#espy art #and of course as always it looks absolutely awful at icon size #i made a good icon once and it took all my good icon making luck to do it #and it was a total accident. every time i try the same thing it's worse somehow?#like whatever. i'll get used to it and i'll complain about the next one i do #icons are more for an excuse to draw literally anything when i'm stuck with zero ideas #so at least if it's bad it served a purpose #y'all dont get to see it but once or twice a month anyways lol #assuming you even bother to glance at it #i hope? my art's stylized enough to be recognizable on it's own? that'd be nice if that's true #if you ask me my art's completely forgettable and unremarkable #i see much better art all the time against my will on this hellsite so it's hard to view my own in a positive way #whatever. two cakes

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bucephaly · 1 year

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BTW if you haven't already please take a minute to look up what venomous snakes are local to you and familiarize yourself with them

#i joined a local snake ID group recently #before that i knew roughly how to spot a pit viper and hownto tell a coral from a scarlet snake #but i didnt really know how to identify specific species other than copperheads #and now im very confident in my ability to tell water snakes from cottonmouths etc #and it gives really nice peace of mind #like. ive seen so many people here in the us south that will freak out of Any snake #my mom once was yelling and crying trying to get help over a kingsnake on the sidewalk cuz she didnt know if it could kill the dogs #and people will kill snakes if they dont know [and often will anyway but knowing helps foster appreciation]#and now i can see a snake and say thats a coachwhip. isnt it pretty. and will gently grab the back end to look at it for just a second more #before letting it go hide #idk. i saw a rattlesnake in the woods today #and its the first time seeing one in the wild like that. and yea it was scary tbh #and i got a pic but booked it out once it noticed me and reacted #but i wish i had stopped and watched it longer cuz it was super pretty #and i know it wouldnt have bothered me at all #im just glad that we've seen two big full sized diamondbacks here in the past few months. and i know theyre two individuals #because eastern diamondbacks are declining and its good to know theres a population here #idk. im getting sentimental over snakes i just love them #but my main point is its so easy to indentify snakes at least where im at #and learning to id them comes with learning to respect them

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puppyeared · 8 months

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I CANT USE CSS ON ARTFIGHT...............

#I WAS REALLY HOPING TO FIX THE FUCKING. PARAGRAPH WIDTH. SIGH #idk why but it stretches across the ENTIRE page like. it takes up the full width of the browser and it BOTHERS ME. ON ALL THE PAGES #i could try manually putting shift breaks but im worried it might not look so good on mobile. ugghh... auyggghhh.....#im already learning CSS and API so i thought i could put it to good use but. AUGH #this whole time ive had to go into the inspect panel myself and change the padding so i dont have to read the length of the screen #like a fucking typewriter... i would have also loved to use custom fonts and animations......#i did find a guide for BBCode which the site uses on default and it covers basic styling but its not the same. sniffle #you CAN unlock CSS if you donate $25 to the page which seems fair. and if i could do it i would but. i do not have any way of #sending or receiving money online </3 i really need to figure out how to do that so i can set up comms like i said i would last summer #but it intimidates me.... and im already kept on a short leash when it comes to that so it feels like a lot of things could go wrong #i think toyhouse allows CSS or some sort of code...?? i remember seeing some oc pages with custom layouts #if thats the case i'll try fiddling with it but im not very familiar with using toyhouse so thatll take a while #(thanks again for the code sal ^_^ ill put it on my pin once its ready but im trying to learn my way around the site heh ;;)#at least i can use my pixel dividers.. ive been digging around for pixels to use and found some really cute ones #yapping

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zarovich · 11 days

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just up worrying cuz idk if i'll ever be me

#personal #granted idk who “me” truly is but i know who im not and im not me. im trying so hard to get help with this lately but no one is hearing me #im afraid ill end up dying as someone im not and others will grieve (?) a person who was never real to begin with #i want to at least die as me. ive not gotten to LIVE as me. whatever idk if anyone gets it i need to keep my head on straight #got so frustrated over it i hit myself in the face yesterday and have a light bruise. i only laugh tho how ridiculous #well im venting here a bit to get it off my chest. need to be strong for my love and nor bother him with this. i love everyone 🫂#ill be okay one day methinks. its just so scary when youre not okay and dont know if you ever will be

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nexus-nebulae · 13 days

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another childhood bucket list item obtained: i finally have a snuggie

#and it's the real thing not even a knockoff #kinda surprised they still exist #but also not surprised bc Blanket. blanket is universal #i just remember a lot of those As Seen On Tv ads like. imploding within 5 years #they still do As Seen On Tv products like there are still boxes marked with that logo it almost feels wrong like an ancient relic #bc most like. ubiquitous 2000s brands from my childhood are just Gone or at least so fundamentally changed it's not the same thing #heard about like 50 more companies going bankrupt probably in the last year alone #anyway ive always wanted a snuggie it's one of those Always Wanted things that never go away #others include: staples easy button (obtained!); mini fridge (not); pillow pet (i had a knockoff once); power drill (not)#i spent a surprising amount of my childhood actually going out of my way to buy stuff i could use in my own apartment in the future #i grew up lower middle class and then just lower class #so like. i always Knew i couldn't just furnish the whole apartment at once i Knew I'd have to build stuff up over time #also bc when my sister got kicked out she had like. nothing. in her trailer. and i did not want to have nothing #i knew if dad was willing to just toss out my sister like that i would absolutely follow suit #and i did! two years younger than my sister when she was!#it just happened that my mom didn't want me homeless at FOURTEEN when i legally could not work for two more years #so she went with me and we lived with my grandma #so take that dad. turns out throwing family members out willy nilly makes the rest of your family not trust you or like you!#and now i get to rub it in his face that HE can't function in a house by himself and still needs to beg my mom to clean up after him #bc i spent so much of my childhood getting berated and called lazy for not doing chores #getting told stuff like 'you have to function by yourself your parents can't always pick up after you'#and then he's literally useless without his wife #he's not disabled and he's not neurodivergent he's never even had a serious health scare he just doesn't bother to learn how to clean #his excuse is that he doesn't know how to use the washer and dryer (it has been almost ten years fucker. learn)#or he doesn't know which cleaning products to use (you have google and a library card. LOOK IT UP)#he's the only person i get mad at for this behaviour bc he's a fucking hypocrite and a child abuser about it too #he is the exception to my rule of everyone needs to be given the space to get things done where they're able and deserve help when needed #and I'll bend over backwards to make excuses for other people so i DONT exclude them from my rule i will try to find every good reason first #he has no fucking excuse though he made two teenagers nearly homeless bc he thought we were too lazy and then he's even worse

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todayisafridaynight · 16 days

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i just want to know if i’m the only one but does anyone else get like really disinterested in a thing if the majority of people interpret it differently from you? like it makes me so annoyed and makes me lose interest in the thing 💀

i sat through the Strangest minedai interpretations over on twitter alone for a while but i still really enjoy minedai so between us i think it is only you. which is fine !

#snap chats #i dont really see twitter post minedai much anymore bar the occasional jp twitter artist tho so vjlaekjvlaj #but yeah like. i get it though #for a split second i thought about Not posting minedai cause i thought what i was thinking was just so. different #that i just felt awkward BUT im glad i posted regardless. cause i love my guys ...#at the very least it does make me Not want to talk about it sometimes but tumblr's different from twitter so LOL #im trying to think if theres ever been a time where a lot of people had a REALLY diff take from me but i cant. think of one #again bar minedai but Again again i didnt let that bother me all that much #idk. i just think its important not to let other people tarnish your fun #and i mean i get WANTING to share the fun with others but yk. cut your losses i guess 😫

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enigmaticdiary · 3 months

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How it feels to resist the urge to blacklist armand daniel and armandaniel off my feeds after i see the 90th devils minion post after every episode and no mention of or any sort of care given to louis

#yapping #Its so crazy bc i like them both and i do like the pairing but Its just like.#Guys.#This isnt about the #them*#Can yall at least fucking wait until armand and louis split before trying to shoehorn daniel into armands field of vision #I obviously have stronger emotions bc of how deeply i care about louis but can u try to imagine what every week has felt like from my pov #I could make a full post about this if i had the bravery which i dont right now but it bothers me a lot and i get more aggravated #every week

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