#Bandit the Jackalope

[doks-aux]

Three-part commission by my beloved @delena-hupp of my FNAFsona/OC(s)! I'm so, so happy with how these came out, I've been looking at them every day. A little infodump:

1) Recently relocated from out-of-state (WAY out-of-state), Harlan Baxter works as overnight security for a Fazbear Entertainment storage facility. It's tiring, isolating work, but they do enjoy getting to browse through all the Bonnie memorabilia. The Bonnie line was always their favorite.

2) Bandit was a character conceived as a minor antagonist for Foxy's Wild West area of the Pizzaplex but was abandoned along with construction of the attraction. No animatronic models were ever made, only concept and key art and a cloth mascot suit buried in storage. Rumors abound on Fazbear fan forums that you can find some images of them hidden in the boarded off log flume area.

3) With no social life but plenty of bills to pay, Harlan doesn't put up a fight when they're called to cover shifts at other FE locations, including restaurants. It's typically security work, but they can be convinced with the promise of payment under the table to help with the entertainment as well. They don't normally like being the center of attention, but something about wearing a mask makes it easier, even fun. They're getting pretty attached to the Bandit jackalope suit they dug out of mothballs to wear.

(If you'd like some of this artist's work for yourself, they have sketch commissions open!)

[ariesgamesandminis]

Restocks are up from Iron Wind Metals!

20-181 Liberator Cruiser 20-250 Anubis ABS-3L 20-264 Marauder MAD-9S / MAD-5R 20-278 Heavy Hover APC (Standard) (2) 20-289 Daimyo DMO-1K 20-300 Odin Scout Tank (Standard) (2) 20-309 Blizzard Hover Transport (Standard) (2) 20-332 Behemoth "Stone Rhino" 2 20-346 Crimson Hawk 20-396 Avatar AV1-O Prime 20-418 Huron Warrior HUR-WO-R4L 20-440 Fireball ALM-7D / ALM-8D 20-474 Peregrine Attack VTOL 20-5010 Koschei KSC-3I 20-5030 Onager 20-5054 Mjolnir MLR-B2 20-5082 Gyrfalcon (Standard) 20-5093 Lament LMT-2R 20-5094 Jackalope JLP-BD 20-5096 Dragon II DRG-11K 20-5130 Kheper KHP-7R 20-5168 Vixen 6 20-5207 Black Knight BL-9KNT 20-5214 Jade Phoenix Prime 20-628 Athena Combat Vehicle (Standard) (2) 20-655 Fire Scorpion 20-690 Owens OW-1 20-723 Warrior Helicopter H-7 20-752 Canis (Standard) 20-756 Akuma AKU-1X 20-793 Hollander BZK-F3 20-800 Hex Bases (4) 20-818 Drillson Heavy Hover Tank (2) 20-854 Hunchback HBK-4G 20-913 Perseus P1 Prime 20-941 Men Shen MS1-O Prime 20-977 Cestus CTS-6Y 20-9122 Battleforce Hex Base 99-201 Large Flat Top Hex Base #1 99-202 Large Flat Top Hex Base #2 AC-010 Large Cast Stem BT-007 Rottweiler Battle Armor BT-028 Cavalier Battle Armor BT-029 Sloth Battle Armor BT-031 Infiltrator MK 2 BT-063 Track Bike BT-067 Golem Battle Armor BT-120 Sabutai Mech Scale Fighter BT-134 Gray Death Legion Battle Armor BT-164 Tracker Surveillance BT-189 Kobold Battle Armor BT-199 Asura Md. Battle Armor BT-224 Heavy Jump Infantry BT-231 Ironhold Battle Armor BT-237 Recon Infantry BT-238 VTOL Infantry BT-239 Jump Support Infantry BT-256 Branth Aerial Beast Infantry - In Fight BT-276 Maxim Hover Tank (3058) BT-303 Vulture Mk III Prime BT-315 Chimera CMA-1S BT-319 Wheeled APC BT-320 Tracked APC BT-346 Griffin GRF-1A BT-350 Doloire DLR-OD BT-364 Gabriel Hovercraft BT-368 Cecerops Protomech BT-371 Davion Infantry (3) BT-372 Savannah Master Hovercraft BT-373 Centaur Protomech BT-375 Gorgon Protomech BT-381 Basic Inner Sphere Battle Armor (3) BT-383 Longinus Battle Armor (3) BT-385 Grey Death Legion Battle Armor (3) BT-386 Undine Battle Armor (3) BT-387 Gnome Battle Armor (3) BT-388 Salamander Battle Armor (3) BT-389 Purifier Battle Armor (3) BT-390 Fa-Shih Battle Armor (3) BT-391 Fenrir Battle Armor (1) BT-412 Amazon Battle Armor BT-436 Buraq (Standard) Battle Armor BT-466 Wheeled Scout (2) Closed & Open Top BT-476 Ares ARS-V1E Apollo FT-025 Samurai Mech Scale Fighter OP-013 Thor E ATM Pod OP-067 Puma E Pod OP-093 Fenris "Ice Ferret" D Left Arm RFLIICLTD-11 Limited Edition Rifleman IIC 8 20-208D Wolverine Antenna 20-393F Gladiator "Executioner" Prime Small Jump Jet Sprue 20-5182C Catapult CPLT-C1 Arm Sprue 20-5182D Catapult CPLT-K2 Arm Sprue 20-685C Bandit Hovercraft Gun Sprue 20-741H J-27 Thumper Tow Vehicle Gun 20-770B Axman AXM-1N Arms / Head Sprue 20-983MSR Mad Cat MK II Missile Rack 20-994D Marauder Bent Leg 20-994I Marauder Small Gun Sprue 20-994I Marauder Small Gun Sprue

[bonesrocksfur]

I found a very sad jackalope at a thrift store. His nose and right ear were gone, and his antlers were plastic. I took him home, glued down what I could of the peeling hide, then gave him a little bandana so he could preserve some of his dignity. He can be a little bandit now.

[diamondsableye]

Two page spread I made for my college final

This was a college final portfolio piece I presented just recently. The class itself was about character design and how to go from a character description, to 2D artwork, then finally a 3D model optimized for animation purposes. It was A LOT and this piece represents probably a minimum of 50 hours of work.

To provide some added context about the world (below the cut)

This is a world where the biblical creation story of genesis is in fact true, (though instead of 6000 years ago it’s an unspecified “somewhere in the distant past”) however, animals took of the fruit of knowledge instead of humans, who never came to be. (which means that fungi took the role of most animals, because it would be weird for me to include anthropomorphic sapient animals alongside non anthro, non sapient counterparts.)

I’m currently working on rewriting parts of the bible for fun, and have come to the conclusion that there should be an extra two books between genesis and exodus (iterations and emergence respectively), which describe in further detail how most “kinds” of animals came to be, (a kind is a group somewhere between species family and species order, so using the same terminology as a biblical kind, but with a different meaning since a biblical kind describes what a creature does not what a creature is which is why whales are classified as fish and bats and locusts are (depending on the translation and passage) “swarming kinds” or “flying kinds”, and sometimes also considered birds.)

If I were to magically get funding or a team behind me (which as awesome as that would be I’m not really in a position to manage for the foreseeable future), the plot of the RPG would go a little something like this: “you play as a barn owl catholic priest who has traveled to the American southwest during the 1880s, (well technically for me anything between the 1860s to the 1910s is fair game, since that’s usually considered the timespan of the “American wild west”), and you seek to seal the gates of hell which have opened up near the quiet town of Haven, which has brought forth many daemons and monsters from the other side. Through your travels you meet Rust, alongside a Jackalope named Cruz, and a Kestrel named Lucia. Throughout your journey you help townsfolk, freeing them from opportunistic bandits as well as all forms of supernatural terrors, while at the same time exploring how religion intersects with issues of race, gender, sexuality, and morality itself.”

I have a lot more in store planned for this project, and I’m happy to answer more questions, but that’s all I’m willing to divulge in a single comment for disclosure sake, since I’m cautious when it comes to potential IP theft. Thank you for understanding!

Edit to add: forgot to mention this, but obviously since all characters are animals, "race" and of course racism is handled a lot differently. I have this graph showing largely how society at large sees the different animal groups, and the closest parallel I can draw to this when it comes to religion is early Mormon views (Curse of Cain and Curse of Ham respectively, basically black people are just born morally and spiritually inferior.)

[whtrbbit]

               Nevermore Backstory.

" sjakalope " : a jackalope like creature from fairytales often the size of a large dog / young deer. their fur can come in many shades , they are best known for their thorn like antlers that change during the season & sharp fangs. enhanced agility & often times able to use different forms of magic. they are classified as werebeast due to their nature of turning & half turning. controlled by their emotions.

His species throughout the years has been called the jackalope however in lamest terms he is more of a werebeast. Only five recorded still exist as many have been hunted down , slaughtered , & mounted. Even after the humans were forced to accept magic was real & allow the creatures to exist with them "sjakalope" were still hunted. Arley was raised all his life told to run , hop. Never settle in one place for a long time. As his father & him were moving Arley got caught in a barbed wire trap. Kicking , screaming. Begging to be saved his father was quick to help his only young. The wire had torn through his stomach , serrating him. Marking him as a victim for the rest of his life. Escaping barely by a moment his father threw him in a bush to recover only to be shot down. A mixture of holly & bloodroot can force the creatures to turn. If killed in their form , they stay like that. Arley hid as he was always told to do. Watching an axe come down on his fathers head , taken away. He wasn't found until three mornings later , soaked , trembling , barely clinging to life. As he was brought to the orphanage he turned for the first time in his life. Some called his true form beautiful others called it monstrous. Arley White was later brought into Nevermore alongside his childhood best friend Bandit Leonne. Growing up in the orphanage together Arley was a quiet , submissive , gentle child. His nickname was the frankenstein rabbit due to his form. While is nickname while dealing became The White Rabbit due to the pill he created using his magic , originally to return the memories , relive a time where his father was alive. Now he remains in the school , focusing on the use of his other magic while attempting to avoid people all together. Since getting older his attitude became quickly ill-tempered , impatient , extremely rude & blunt.

[ryry-artblog]

My Faeries doing the Sailormoon redraw meme

[nomadicauthor287]

Wild West AU

Sorry this took so long y’all! Enjoy! Be sure to like and reblog!

In the year of the force 1865, the great civil war came to a close. But with the end came a great cost, although the separatists lost, the republic lost as well with the mass execution of the generals for reasons of treason against the president. The republic was burned and a new order rose from the ashes. The Empire took over different territories claiming it was for peace but little by little it turned into tyranny.

Wrecker: Luther “Wrecker” Warner

Echo: Lewis “Echo” Sloan (Pair of revolvers)

Hunter: Bernard “Hunter” Spence (knives, knives, axes)

Crosshairs: Julius “Crosshairs” Spears

Tech: Irving “Tech” Bullock

Crosshairs is a Lieutenant Colonel in the Empire. A ruthless man is known for his remarkable marksmanship. Troops on both sides called him an angel of death because he just needed one shot to kill his target.

He rose through the ranks with his ruthless nature until he made his way up to Lieutenant Colonel.

But only a few people know about his one weakness. His little sister, Omega, is only 7 years old but smart as a whip and prodigy at strategy games.

Crosshair doesn’t trust anyone with his youngest sister. While he is an angel of death, she is an angel of life

Her brother tests her by challenging her to either chess matches and with hypothetical situations of battle with dioramas she made

Those tests were actually plans he uses to train his troops for battle

Also, battle strategies he uses

When Omega finds out what her strategies were made for battle and saw what happened to the systems after they swept through she was horrified

Lately, the Empire has been dealing with bandits that have been intercepting telegrams to steal supplies

Weapons

Food

Crosshair is tasked with the capture of these bandits

Some time passes and Omega makes a plan to escape

When she does escape her supplies and horse are immediately stolen once night falls

So she walks to town where she sells her headband given to her by her governess (Nala Se)

She walks into a local saloon and gets some grub

There was no other place to sit except next to this group of mercenaries talking about their next job

They question her why she’s sitting next to them and why she doesn’t move

She says she feels comfortable around them and the bespeckled fellow comments that that has never happened before

Their longhair leader questions her on why she’s here and where her parents are

She tells them she’s on a mission to save her people in the village she ran away from

She follows them to a saloon run by Cid

She’s one of the most successful women on that side of the West

They do jobs for ammo and supplies

She stows away on their wagon the next day when they go on a job

Wrecker is a wild man who loves nature and all her creatures

has a burro named Burrito

A Jackalope named Lula

Hunter is their big brother and leader of the group

Sometimes he doesn’t know what he’s doing

Echo is handicapped from the war but that doesn’t mean he can’t fight

He may not look it but he’s got plenty of fight left in him to find out what happened to his brother

Tech is the smartest and dumbest one out of all of them

He can tap into telegram lines as well as make all their equipment

The job they go on is to track someone who’s been kidnapping people

Zygerrians trying to bring slavery back

Omega makes herself useful and helps them recover the kidnapped people plus their target, Muchi

On that job she claims a bow from a boy who thanks her for saving him

Wrecker decided to let her stay with them

So they let Omega stay with them

Some time passes and Omega learns new skills from them

How to change a wheels

How to lasso creatures

Tap into telegram lines

Cook

Pan for gold

Next job they have to retrieve stolen resources

This time they enlist the help of the crew called the Green Phantoms

The Green Phantoms- (my OCs)

[I’ll do a character board soon]

10 members in all

They were an elite team made by a third party

They thought if kids with mystic powers were trained from infants they would be stronger

With training and surgical enhancements, it would make them stronger

They were said to be myths because there was no proof they existed because most targets associated with them were killed by “natural” causes or went missing

Luna Blade

Othed Dragoah

Verk Wress

Cam Tretey

Barux Rhitron

Ser Limser

Vonich Jhuc

Res Blonir

Ciara Blade

Koji

They track down the supplies to a remote part of the west in a canyon

They make Omega the lookout in case something goes wrong

There it’s rumored that there is a whole family of inbreds who ride on the backs of keeradaks

Once they have a visual on the supply cart they hold the Patriarch at gunpoint and tell him to bring out the rest of his family with their hands up

Turns out that wasn’t a good idea because his whole clan comes out

Someone fires a shot but it wasn’t anyone on the ground and the bantha pulling the wagon freaks out and runs

Tech and Ciara drive the cart while the others fight off the clan

The family chase them down on keeradaks

Some of the family board the cart and attack the drives until Hunter and Luna on horseback fought them off while the rest of the Green Phantoms fight off those on top of the cart

During all of this though Barux was negotiating moonshine prices with the matriarch

Rango - Water chase

The family starts tossing dynamite at them

Then Koji gets lasso’d off the wagon which helps her board and then rides the keeradak

Towards the end of the line, someone shoots one of the wheels off of the wagon and it comes to a stop

Turns out the cart was a trap and was full of imperial soldiers

All of them are captured and are put under arrest by order of Lieutenant Colonel Julius Spears or Crosshair

He beats both Luna and Hunter for the location of his sister

“Is this any way to treat your brother Julius!” Luna spat

Omega who was hiding in the distance with Burrito

“Brother?” she questions

She was shocked that the men who took her in were actually her brothers

Luna causes a distraction that lets Hunter, Tech, Echo, Wrecker, and Ciara escape with Omega

They all run away to a ranch run by their friend Cut where they hideout for a few days

End of part 1?

@soundwavetherav @zaffur @echoy-naak @eyecandyeoz @dreamy-day-daze @kratosfan6632466 @agentmarymargaretskitz @itsjml

[asimovsideburns]

Archipelago session summary 5! Which is still technically being written before session 6! It’s fine!

Okay, so, when last we left out intrepid heroes, they were failing to determine whether or not goblins have bones. They just don’t know! This is fine! Don’t worry about it!

They travel to Falcon’s hunting lodge as a stopover on their way to check in on Butterskull Ranch, planning to drop Tibor there and make him Falcon’s problem. They make it there without incident, and the cook lets them in. They give him the wine they brought, as well as Shrimp’s Mystery Liquid, take a tour of the grounds, and get settled in for dinner (Adva spends some time with the rabbits first, though).

It is one of the dinners of all time, for sure.

First, Adva noticed that Falcon’s food is not the same as theirs, and jumps to the conclusion that he is, in fact, a werewolf. And then asks him how long he’s been a werewolf. He is not a werewolf. Also it’s rude to just ask people you don’t know about their medical history??? He’s like, hey I’m not a werewolf?? Like look I’ve even got actual silver silverware. It self disinfects.

Nim is not eating because they are allergic to silver. Nim also is not saying anything about it.

Shrimp is like. Hmm. The energy in here is so bad right now. So they loudly make an excuse to take Nim and head off to the kitchen, were the cook (Corwin! That was his name!) and Pell are eating their dinner. Mason and Chantry are like. Bro We Are Just Sitting Here.

Adva keeps pressing and Falcon is like, you know what, I think I’m going to go eat in my room actually.

Shrimp and Nim go to the kitchen and end up having a wonderful time with Corwin and Pell—there are wooden utensils in addition to silver ones, and after dinner Nim teaches the others how to play Fizzbin, a card game with rules both many and complex.

Meanwhile, Adva, Mason, and Chantry decide to explore around the main house. Chantry has a breastplate, but Mason’s chain mail gives her disadvantage in stealth, so she takes it off and wraps it up so it doesn’t make noise, and Adva wildshapes into a jackalope (almiraj stat block).

They stealth upstairs and look around, correctly perceiving which door has Falcon behind it and then finding first the deluxe guest room and then a locked door. They stand around talking and trying to get into the locked room, and Falcon storms out, revealing that they had in fact NOT beaten his passive perception, and tells them that they have tested his hospitality enough. They are to return to the guest house and leave in the morning.

They do return to the guest house, but the locked door… it intrigues them. After a short rest to regain wildshape uses, Mason and Adva head over to one of the pillars that supports this extension, Mason decides to… start smoking? As a distraction? Mason has never smoked before. She stole the pipe and tobacco from the deluxe guest bedroom. She fails her con save really badly and starts coughing, then goes for another drag and starts puking. Smoking is bad for you, kids!!

Adva wildshapes into an ant and crawls under the door and finds… something bad.

In the dining room from before, there were a lot of taxidermy animals—Falcon is Falcon the Hunter, after all, I suppose? But here, in this room, are taxidermy people. Heads, mounted on the wall, each with a blood-caked arrow mounted next to them.

Mostly orcs, like Mason and Chantry.

Adva nopes out of there, grabs Mason, grabs Shrimp and Nim from the kitchen, and bolts back to the guest house, dropping a fog cloud on the way to obscure their movement. She fills everyone in and they spend a while deciding between fight and flight before finally deciding that they need to kill Falcon here and now.

They set a trap to lure him out and ambush the unsuspecting hunter. During combat, he starts monologuing, revealing that, yes, he does in fact kill and eat people. He says bandits, and he says it’s because he needs to eat flesh to survive without becoming something worse (he is, mechanically, a ghoulish dhampir), but the truth of the matter is that he’s allowed himself to become a monster, no matter what delusions he believes.

The team gets a few hits in, persuade/intimidate Corwin and Pell into running, and Falcon disengages and retreats back into the house, out of sight.

Tonight, we’ll pick up where we left off, and someone is going to die.

Hopefully Falcon.

[gra-sonas]

Amber is voicing a character named BW (a “sardonic bounty hunter of the Gulch. Not much is known about her but she enjoys messing with the sheriffs, especially Rawhide.”) in the upcoming animated series Long Gone Gulch. The show will premiere on January 11th on YouTube.

Long Gone Gulch is a comedic fantasy about two young sheriffs who must serve and protect a secluded mythical world, home to many legendary creatures of folklore.  Follow energetic cowgirl, Rawhide (the only human born in the Gulch) and sarcastic greaser, Snag (the only human outsider) as they become the law of the land.  Their unlikely friendship causes them to learn from each other as they deal with a variety of problems within a town of folks who aren't exactly on their side. Among them are Mayor Rhubarb, the strict yet neurotic jackalope, BW, the mysterious bounty hunter who is not what she seems and Mako, the dastardly shark mutant and his gang of bandits. 

[fromthe-point]

PROVIDENCE, R.I. – Brown men's hockey head coach Brendan Whittet has announced the addition of ten incoming student-athletes who are set to join the roster for the 2019-20 season. Brown's latest group of incoming freshmen is made up of six forwards and four defensemen.

Luke Albert, D 6-2 / 201 Fergus, Ontario || Bonnyville Pontiacs (AJHL)

-

Bradley Cocca, F 5-8 / 170 Toronto, Ontario || Merritt Centennials (BCHL)

-

James Crossman, D 6-3 / 200 Denver, Colorado || Odessa Jackalopes (NAHL)

-

Matty Holmes, F 6-2 / 200 Rye, New York || Chilliwack Chiefs (BCHL)

-

Luke Krys, D 6-2 / 185 Ridgefield, Connecticut || Salisbury School (USHS-Prep)

-

Connor Marshall, F 5-11 / 185 Parkland, Florida || Northeast Generals (NAHL)

-

Samuli Niinisaari, D 6-1 / 187 Hamina, Finland || Lincoln Stars (USHL)

-

Nathan Plessis, F 6-4 / 205 Salmon Arm, British Columbia || Brooks Bandits (AJHL)

-

Cole Quisenberry, F 5-11 / 180 Denver, Colorado || Chicago Steel (USHL)

-

Jonny Russell, F 5-11 / 173 Traverse City, Michigan || Des Moines Buccaneers (USHL)

[erlebniis-blog]

BASICS ;;

COMMON NAMES. qiushi “arlo” guan (關秋實) PAST NAMES. charles guan NICKNAMES. ....get creative AGE. approximately 350 years old; appears 26 GENDER/PRONOUNS. male, he/him/his BIRTHDAY. october 2nd HOMETOWN. hard to say NATIONALITY. american SPECIES. huli jing OCCUPATION. "house flipper” ORIENTATION. pansexual/panromantic

PERSONALITY ;;

MBTI. isfp DAEMON/PATRONUS. jackalope STARSIGN. libra MORAL ALIGNMENT. true neutral INTELLIGENCE TYPE. naturalist, spatial, bodily-kinesthetic SKILLS/ABILITIES. omnivoyance. medium. astral projection. fox form.

PHYSICAL ;;

HEIGHT. 5′ 11″ BODY TYPE. athletic EYE COLOR. dark brown HAIR COLOR. black ACCENT. west coast leaning of general american TATTOOS. n/a PIERCINGS. one in each ear SCARS. nothing notable EYESIGHT. 20/20 (or more ifuknowwhatimean)

ABOUT ;;

started as a fox in about the 1600s && lived on temple grounds the whole time

was able to adopt a human form around 50 years of his life

traveled to the us for fun around the early 1800s && worked as a tailor for a time on the west coast

grew bored && became a cowboy/bandit for a long period of time; had a side gig as a medium sometimes

later on started to buy houses to fix && then flip them; gave him a place to say but also a cover to keep moving

really liked the 80s. no reason, just because, well. aesthetic

[doks-aux]

Birthday art from Brie on Twitter!

I was so surprised and happy to get art of Harlan. The little Bandit emojis might be the cutest thing I've ever seen. 💖

[limitedrevolverworks]

Varmints -2-

Approximately twenty minutes and nearly twice as many miles of bumpy travel later, Doc Norton and Earnest Rivers’ jackalopes were approaching the festival of fruitless carnage taking place in the back of Leeroy Gilligan’s property. The sign held between two poles that gave way to the ranch proper said as much; and if the crude, scratchy calligraphy had skirted the limits of human comprehensibility too close, the crackling of freshly ignited explosions going off every few seconds would have tipped off those who had received news of the latest undead spree.

“Boys must be winnin’.” yelled Earnest Rivers over the noise of occasional wandfire and the jackalopes’ heavily footed hops. “We was blastin’ them brainsuckers so hard earlier we hadn’t the time to listen them moan.”

“Unless some of the ‘boys’ already joined the losing side.” shouted back Doc Norton, the wooden cargo strapped behind him protesting the bumpy ride with a plethora of clinking noises from its glassy contents.

The pair circled around Gilligan’s house, a rough assembly of wood and metal like that of any other respectable scale-skinned Second Layer dweller, behind which lay the barn - a small complex divided in two connected sectors, respectively housing the geese’s nests and the smelting furnace where their natural byproducts found their first and last destination. The cylindrical steel chimney puncturing the latter side’s roof sputtered smoke at regular intervals, little gray clouds lazily floating away from the chaos going on on the dust-bitten ground. The occasional breeze made it seem as if the gaseous particles were waving at the fresh batch of participants, or offering a goodbye to those who had left prematurely by means of having had one too many limbs torn from the rest of their body.

“Ahoy, calfsuckers! Here to get yerselves a steamin’ hot piece of action too?”

The croaky voice of Malady Summers welcomed the pharmacist and his escortee in the midst of the small crowd that had formed at the edge of the Gilligan estate’s cow ranch. Doc Norton and Rivers dismounted their jackalopes near the hitch where a variety of other furry mounts were busy snacking on a vat of ground cacti, their ears occasionally quivering in unison with the occasional discharging noise coming from a triggered wand. Both men approached the group of about two dozen cowboys, some of them perched over the wooden paddock to fire at the vaguely human shapes shambling in the distance, the rest enjoying a variety of typical steppe-borne time wasters, the bulk of them involving alcoholics contained in bottles of colored glass darker than the hearts of bandits.

“How’re the goings, Summers?” asked Rivers, reaching for the bottle of Hardy’s Ole Scum proffered by the woman’s scaly hand, offering it to Doc Norton’s shaking head, and proceeding to pour a hearty portion of the contents down his throat. The many dull spikes lining Summers’ dark blue shoulders moved like waves in a pond as she shrugged.

“Still on, Rivers. Doc…” The lizard nodded at the pharmacist, who gave one of his own almost as an afterthought: his attention had already been taken by the rotting spectacle in the distance. “Some of ‘em’ve been blasted so thoroughly they be crawlin’ along by the skin of them’s tooths, and I be meanin’ it literally.”

Before she had finished talking, the lizardite had turned on her spurred legs, so fast the wide-brimmed hat sitting on the many braids of her rust-red hair, unable to keep up, stood in place; in the same vein, the onlookers’ eyes tried and mostly failed to catch a glimpse of her clawed hands reaching for the shiny metal wand holstered near her hip, pointing it and squeezing the trigger. On the other hand, none had any trouble witnessing the fountain of guts that, in the distance, began sputtering from a dead man’s torsoless legs, their top half still smoldering from the freshly detonated explosive spell.

“You seein’ this, Doc? Only silver linin’ to this be that the things’re so slow by now that they’re less threatenin’ than a domesticated tumbleweed.” Summers concluded by rotating the gun in her hand, letting it loose in the air and catching it back, still mid-rotation, on the tip of her long, spiky tail. “Not gonna lie, it got tirin’ fast. I’d even be feelin’ sorry for them rottin’ bastards if, y’ know. If they weren’t rottin’ bastards.”

“And that’s how it be, Doc.” concluded Rivers, taking one last swig before handling the mostly empty bottle back to a less than pleased Summers. “We was thinkin’ to shove the pieces into a bag and cart them off over the border, but this don’t sit too well with most of us. Doing the dead like that, it don’t feel right.”

“Can’t see so much as a particle of remorse on any of your faces about usin’ them for target practice though, Rivers.” condescendingly rebuked Doc Norton, satchel slung over his shoulder and boots steadily raising the dust with each step taken towards the enclosure.

“Sure thing Doc, but shootin’ a trespasser’s a whole different beast entirely.” Summers hurried to say, substituting Rivers to the pharmacist’s side while the former wordlessly rejoined his companions for more free booze. “We’d still be givin’ them bones a proper rest when all’s said and done. Shoving corpses off the continent, scatterin’ them all across that dump of a Third Layer below… nah, some of us may be wandslingin’ sons of disreputable mommas, but we got at least that much honor left in our hearts - both of ‘em in us lizardfolk’s case.”

Doc Norton’s moved response was a laconic “What a honorable bunch of no-gooders.” He felt decidedly less interested in the ethics of cattle hustlers than he did about the mystery concerning the latest brand of undead to have hit the country this week. Marching through the grouped up cowboys tipping their hats and occasionally hollering about repaying some debts for a medicine or other that he most assuredly wasn’t going to cash in anytime soon, the pharmacist shoved a bullman about to score a flaming hit out of the way, lowered his ever-present pair of goggles and turned some of the innumerable dented wheels jutting out of them.

“Early stages of decay… seems to be the most consistent trait, at least among the bits and pieces that are still recognizable.”

“Ain’t many of those left.”

“I’d rather you didn’t sound so pleased about makin’ my job harder, Summers.”

Be that as it may, the lizard’s toothy grin didn’t seem eager to leave her face anytime soon.

“Mmh...” More cranking noises accompanied the telescopic regulation of Doc Norton’s lenses. “Where’s the cattle?”

“Cousin Leeroy’s took the opportunity to bring the herd grazin’ at the Robertsie Mines. I can say for sure the mites appreciate the trouble better than me cousin.”

“He saved himself a lot more than he thinks.” commented Doc Norton, raising his goggles and a leg along with it. The wandfire ceased soon thereafter, when the pharmacist was done climbing over the fence and had begun strolling in a trajectory that led straight in the midst of the zombie-infested field. Summers was soon hot on his metaphorical tail, while her decidedly more corporeal followed suit after a few nervous thumps from the sheer surprise.

“Doc, you better be packin’ a lot of parchments if you’re plannin’ to take them on all alone.”

“I don’t count a stand-off against a bunch of ravenous flesheaters among the most feasible of plans, Summers. Which is why instead of heat I’m packing this here bag o’ components with me.”

“Son of a rabid daredevil! You want to feed that crazed gray matter of yours to those cannibals?”

Doc Norton turned his head and the moustache attached to it towards the lizard without letting his step grow any less hurried. Whether he was grinning or scowling behind the thick layer of hair covering his mouth was anybody’s guess.

“Well, Summers. I’ll be countin’ on you and yer impeccable skills with a wand to prevent that happenin’, in the impossibly unlikely event of that becomin’ necessary.”

[vetica-grand-line-gazette-g-blog]

Top 5 Cutest Pirate Mascots

(((For Newsroom Ask: 😺 requested by @pilawforhire ))) by Vetica Fuller I have had quite a bit of time to look through the wanted posters recently, and one of the things that struck me as odd was how infrequently we appreciate how adorable some of the mascots for the pirate crews are. Therefore, I decided to take it upon myself to rank the Top Five Cutest Pirate Mascots. 5. Farul (White Horse Pirates) Farul, the valiant warhorse of the world’s most famous white knight, like his master has quite the handsome face. He is well known for his bravery in battle even on the high seas, which is quite impressive for an otherwise normal horse. His bounty rounds up to about 2 berries. 4. Bepo (Heart Pirates) Though a little bit scary, very few things are cuter than a big fluffy bear like Bepo of the Heart Pirates. He wears a jumpsuit featuring the crew’s Jolly Rodger, which really allows him to represent the group well, and there are even rumors that they have taught him to speak and steer the ship. Is he a mythical Mink or just really well trained? We will probably never know, but he sure is fun to look at. Bepo has earned a cumulative bounty of 500 berries. 3. Ai Ai (Glass-Eyed Pirates) Ai Ai, the mischievous monkey companion of “Glass-Eye” Robeson, is well known as a charmer in the South Blue. Frequently people are so taken in by his cute antics, that they hardly notice they have been robbed by the little thief, and it is this skill that earned him a staggering bounty of 10,000 berries. Items that he has successfully stolen include: five pounds of gold, the blueprints for a naval base, the Gator Emerald, and the prince of Sofifi Island’s favorite baby booties. 2. Tony Tony Chopper (Strawhat Pirates) Voted “most likely to be sold as a stuffed animal” in the Bi-annual Pirate Poll, this winter island jackalope has been very popular among children since he first emerged on the scene two years ago. In fact, his wanted posters became so popular at one point, that the Marines considered discontinuing it for fear that it would encourage children to take off for he high seas. Despite the notoriety of the Strawhat crew, Tony Tony Chopper’s bounty has remained quite low at a mere 100 berries. 1 . Great Sea Snails (Germa 66) The gigantic babies of the sea, these monstrous snails can carry entire buildings on their backs. Though not individually distinguishable like the other mascots on the list, the Great Sea Snails are iconic to the underworld organization. A little known fact about these great beauties, is that they, like their smaller cousins, posses the ability to transmit messages to each other over long distances. It was originally thought that this evolved as a way for them to coordinate their constantly changing migration habits, but further research suggests that it might be to simply ease the stress of being alone outside of the mating season. If you are able to capture one of these Snails, it is recommended that you take them to the nearest Marine base so they can be rehabilitated and returned to the wild, but never disturb a wild Great Sea Snail, as it is illegal to detain them. Snail conservation is a real issue! Honorable Mention: The Lone Dugong Nobody knows exactly why this Kung Fu Dugong has traveled so far away from its home on Alabasta. Perhaps it got lost during the chaos of the civil war. However, we can all agree that he has made quite the splash over the past year, appearing randomly in ports all across the Grand Line to challenge bandits and pirates alike. Recent sightings currently place this little traveler as far as the New World. You go little Dugong! This concludes our list of Top Five Cutest Pirate Mascots, but, though they are fun to discuss and look at, if you see one of these Mascots in person it is recommended that you call authorities and take shelter immediately.

[imakethecard]

Individual Lorado card comments

Already covered the mythics, so this’ll be about the other rarities.

Common

I like Call Your Bluff, but I wish it was a little stronger. I’d like it to be good enough for Standard.

Campfire is definitely not strictly worse than Wild Growth. Producing a colour of mana that you don’t necessarily have already is probably an upside, not a downside. It might actually be too good; Elvish Mystic is already very strong, and this much harder to get rid of.

Dire Jackalope is cute. Should probably a Rabbit Elk, though.

Festering Blacklung is pretty neat flavourwise.

I really like Guns Blazing.

Hyastee Sigil would be a great place to talk about who Brother Wolf is or how the Hyastee differ from other tribes.

Into the Sunset is sweet.

Ironhoof Ox probably doesn’t need to be about Ace.

Lumberwood Hidebehind is a really nice elegant card. Taught me a story, too.

Kinda funny to see the John Henry analogue on Man Versus Machine standing for racism.

Mug of Beer made me smile.

Nimble Spellslinger has a weird name for a Rogue.

Nothing to Lose has amazing flavour text.

Outlaw Necromancer is cool but his ability should probably be optional.

Penetrating Round has a really nice elegant design.

I think Pine Gulch Bandit should be a Zombie.

Rugged Lumberjack has the only art in the set that I dislike.

Why not make Run and Gun target up to one creature you control?

See You In Hell is pretty cool. I probably should’ve mentioned this in my main review, but this set has great names for its cards.

Voracious Wendigo has great flavour text.

Not sure Wanted should be able to enchant your own creatures.

Uncommon

The album has Stunshot Centaur twice for some reason.

Bloodshot Desperada seems pretty darn strong. Maybe too strong.

I think Briar Rabbit should be a Rogue. He’s wearing clothes, and looks Hang-able.

If Cattle Rustler isn’t good enough, why not give it haste?

Fan the Hammer seems abusable. Both in Storm and in Burn.

Grit is pretty sweet.

Hang is pretty clever. And I don’t know why, but it makes me laugh that being mixed-race makes it easier to lynch you.

I think you might be underestimating Haste Retreat; it looks quite powerful to me.

I like the flavour on Inside Job.

Lightning Reload is sweet, but I think it’s strong enough without being able to target opposing equipment.

Mantle of Revolution feels a little out of place in a set without any other mention of revolution.

Rancher’s Lasso is pretty cool.

Redeemed Dead is quite nice. Very elegant.

Settle is my pick for the set’s most powerful card after Farajo. If Sylvan Scrying and Hour of Promise can see Modern play...

I don’t like the way that Thunderbolt Revolver works. I think the equipped creature should tap or something when shooting someone; as is, equipping it feels like a chore. Same goes for the rare shotgun.

Trestle Butcher annoys me because it’s not a Sheep or a Goat. The source material monster is both, and this set supports both types. Plus, there are no actual Goat creatures, and that bugs me. I say make it a Sheep Goat Horror.

I’m not sure Wildcard’s effect should be possible.

Rare

Angelic Regulator feels weak. Compare it to Angel of Invention.

I’m among the fans of Bloodshot Coachthief.

I’m not sure this set can support Colossus of Railroads.

Drag Behind is pretty sweet.

I like the flavour on High Noon.

Hyastee Sphinx is interesting mainly because it implies that Sphinxes live among humans on Lorado.

Feels wrong that you can put Last Will and Testament on an opposing creature.

Motherlode is appropriately exciting.

I quite like Off the River; I might knock the cost down to 5, in hopes of putting it into Constructed.

Pactbound Simians is really neat.

For his beautiful flavour and novel effect, Sheriff Josiah Woods is my favourite card in Lorado.

Skinwalker might be better as a 2/2 for UB. Wouldn’t be broken at all.

Snake OIl Salesman is super cool, but seems like a rules headache. What if I trade snake oil for a creature, then trade that creature for another creature controlled by a third player, then sacrifice that creature and the salesman?

Big fan of Tall Tales.

Timberland Giant is neat, but I feel like his Ox should have trample.

Wisdom feels more mythic than most of the actual mythics.

[mechagalaxy]

Sten Hugo Hiller - 627184: THE WAR OF `45. Intra-clan fighting done

(By Sten Hugo Hiller - 627184) THE WAR OF `45. Intra-clan fighting done

The third battleday is over. The fifty-six clans who signed up for the war have battled each other to a dangerous level of exhaustion. And why? To stand squarely in the path of the Bandit Kings incoming hordes.

The final rounds scores were:

Div 1

Warlock 81 - 9 Leviathan

The Warlocks won 90% of all engagements and were the clear victors.

Death`s Collector`s 71 - 14 Brotherhood of Arcane Dragons

The Collectors have established themselves as the strongest Challengers the Warlocks have

Div 2

Northwind Dragons 76 - 32 Spirit of Bunny

In a solid show of strenght the Northwind Dragons soundly trashed the heavier Bunnies

Death`s Brethren 120 - 4 Smurf Heavy Cavalry

The Smurf Heavy Cavalry were anhilated by the Death`s brethren

Div 3

Black Star Lycan Rangers 65 - 7 Avengers of Bunny

The Rangers crushed the Bunnies better than 9-1.

Myth and Legends Blood Wolves 80 - 42 Slaughter House 5

The Slaughter House crew did their best, but were to weak to hold their own against the Wolves

Div 4

The Brotherhood BlackWatch 52 - 8 Star League

BlackWatch crushed the Star League by better than 6-1.

Heroes 75 - 45 Pink Fluffy Unicorns Dancing on Rainbows

The Unicorns got in quite a few licks, but the Heroes stood triumphant at the end.

Div 5

Guardians of Bunny 2 - 50 Phoenix

Phoenix was unstoppable and the Bunnies stood no chance.

Black Star Jackalopes 48 - 12 ***Raging Vengeance***

The Jackalopes took the Vengeance seekers to the cleaners by crushing them 4-1.

Death`s Revenge 100 - 4 Myth and Legends Black Cats 13th Armored division

The Cats were blown to pieces by Death`s Revenge.

Heroes Support 68 - 14 Mad Scientist.7

The Heroes got a boost to their morale after beating the Scientists better than 4-1.

Div 6

Death`s Disturbed Asylum 5 - 63 Steampunk Dragons

Steampunk Dragons was unbeatable here and outscored the Asylants better than 12-1.

Defenders of Bunny 15 - 43 Armored Core

Armored Core was to tough for the Bunnies this time.

Smurf Platoon 29 - 58 Emerald Dragons

The Dragons dicipline and bloodthirst let them beat the Smurfs 2-1.

HF Dragoons 50 - 5 Myth and Legends NecroManics

The Dragoons wiped the floor with the Necromaniacs and got ten wins for each the Necromanics managed to secure

Div 7

Black Star Bandits 45 - 0 Heroes Ranger Raccoons

The Bandits took win after win while the Raccoons was unwilling to attack.

Ronins 35 - 50 Renegades

The Ronins stayed in shouting distance for a while, but the Renegades pulled away in the end.

Death`s Reapers 73 - 86 Brigade of Patrol Smurfs

Death`s Reapers was seemingly in control, but the Smurfs overwhelmed them in the end

HF 110th Cannon Company 1st Armored Regiment 59 - 11 Dinochrome Brigade

The Dinochrome Brigade was blown apart by heavy Cannon barrages.

Div 8

The Brotherhood 1st Kearney Highlanders 29 - 2 Mech Point Academy "Rangers"

The Highlanders teached the Academy how to fight a war.

today and tomorrow 70 - 6 Major Steel

Major Steel suffered a bad defeat today, perhaps they will do better tomorrow?

**Raging Vengeance** 53 - 55 Heroes Light Brigade

The fight was in the balance until the last minutes when the Heroes got a few additional wins.

Behemoth 78 - 114 Arctic Warfare Bandits

This ended up as the battle who had most fights. And the Bandits won most of them.

Div 9

JC`s Rowdy Bunch 19 - 3 *Raging Vengeance*

JC and his bunch beat of those who sought Vengeance by better than 6-1

MurderMechs 71 - 13 *Raging Vengeance 2.0*

The Murdermechs outscored their opponents by better than 5-1

Indo Nusa Alliance 34 - 15 Karma

Indo Nusa Alliance withstood the bad Karma

Insane Clown Posse 69 - 17 Dirty Little Girls

The Clowns won in the end, but they lost every fifth attack they launched. The Girls never attacked. --- One complaint often heard is the disparity between averages between the clans in the various divisions.

But do a higher average neccesarily point toward a better placement? Lets look at the medals given out, and the total averages (all members included) the clans had toward the end of the first battleday:

Div 1

Gold: Warlock (375.8) Silver: Death`s Collector`s (345.5) Bronze: Leviathan (354.8) Plastic: Brotherhood of Arcane Dragons (288.8)

Div 2

Gold: Northwind Dragons (185.1) Silver: Spirit of Bunny (267.4) Bronze: Death`s Brethren (191.8) Plastic: Smurf Heavy Cavalry (151.5)

Div 3

Gold: Black Star Lycan Rangers (172.8) Silver: Avengers of Bunny (169.3) Bronze: Myth and Legends Blood Wolves (165.6) Plastic: Slaughter House 5 (164.9)

Div 4

Gold: The Brotherhood BlackWatch (146.5) Silver: Heroes (146) Bronze: Star League (157.6) Plastic: Pink Fluffy Unicorns Dancing on Rainbows (135.9)

Div 5

Gold: Phoenix (121) Silver: Guardians of Bunny (126.4) Silver: Black Star Jackalopes (133.2) Silver: Death`s Revenge (133.2) Bronze: ***Raging Vengeance*** (127.3) Bronze: Myth and Legends Black Cats 13th Armored Division (117.1) Bronze: Heroes Support (118) Plastic: Mad Scientist.7 (114)

Div 6

Gold: Steampunk Dragons (97.9) Silver: Death`s Disturbed Asylum (113.3) Silver: Armored Core (90.4) Silver: Emerald Dragons (84.5) Bronze: Defenders of Bunny (95.4) Bronze: Smurf Platoon (94.4) Bronze: HF Dragoons (109.9) Plastic: Myth and Legends NecroManiacs (87.1)

Div 7

Gold: Black Star Bandits (92.6) Silver: Heroes Ranger Raccoons (73.2) Silver: Renegades (68.1) Silver: Brigade of Patrol Smurfs (68) Bronze: Ronins (70.9) Bronze: Death`s Reapers (69.1) Bronze: HF 110th Cannon Company 1st Armored Regiment (79.1) Plastic: Dinochrome Brigade (71.9)

Div 8

Gold: The Brotherhood 1st Kearney Highlanders (67.8) Silver: Mech Point Academy "Rangers" (59.6) Silver: today and tomorrow (63.8) Silver: Heroes Light Brigade (54.6) Bronze: Major Steel (42.5) Bronze: **Raging Vengeance** (57.7) Bronze: Arctic Warfare Bandits (41.6) Plastic: Behemoth (54.5)

Div 9

Gold: JC`s Rowdy Bunch (43.3) Silver: *Raging Vengeance* (35) Silver: MurderMechs (33.9) Silver: Indo Nusa Allince (25.5) Bronze: *Raging Vengeance 2.0* (23.2) Bronze: Karma (23.4) Bronze: Insane Clown Posse (19.5) Plastic: Dirty Little Girls (14.6)

In the 4 top divisions the top ranked clans got 2 Golds, 1 Silver and 1 Bronze, while the lowest ranked got 4 Plastics.

In the 5 "Regular" divisions the top ranked clans got 3 Golds and 2 Silvers, while the lowest ranked got 2 Silvers, 1 Bronze and 2 Plastic.

Not saying a high average is unimportant. But in addition good Mechs, weapons and equipment plays a role. And of course, having HG helps and being present to actually fight is vital if one wants prizes.