#Beverley Horn

[brookbee]

I know people are either following me because I used to post about Star Trek constantly or because I post about Bowie a lot, so here’s some random David Bowie and Star Trek connections I’ve been collecting for the past year or so. This is purely self-indulgent, but if you find this sort of thing interesting, here you go.

This is from an unpublished interview for Zygote magazine from 1971 where he was discussing the meaning of various songs. The particular song he's talking about here is "The Supermen." In case you don't want to read the full article for context, he mentioned Star Trek to act as a comparison, he was not saying that that was the initial inspiration/meaning.

This ad has song notes that Bowie wrote for the album Hunky Dory. The one of relevance is “Bewlay Brothers,” which is at the bottom of the list. It says, “Another in the series of David Bowie confessions — Star Trek in a Leather Jacket.”

You might be wondering what this means, well Bowie never really gave a consistent answer as to what this song was about. And according to Ken Scott, the producer of the album, Bowie purposefully wrote it to give a song to Americans who were reading too much into things (this was in the era of the Paul McCartney actually died and was replaced conspiracy lol). Bowie did say at different points that it was more or less about his own half-brother, but who knows if he changed his mind about that.

Although as a side note I will say that some of the lyrics sound like they could be describing Star Trek episodes lol

My Life With Bowie: Spider From Mars by Woody Woodmansey (drummer for the Spiders From Mars, Bowie’s band during the Ziggy Stardust era). He’s describing the bar in The Rainbow Room, as they were rehearsing for the most elaborate of the Ziggy Stardust concerts in August of 1972.

Mick Ronson talking about the Ziggy Stardust boots, the clip is from the documentary Beside Bowie: The Mick Ronson Story. Angie, in case people don’t know, was Bowie’s first wife.

Side note about this one though, Bowie compared his own boots to wrestler boots (see image below). But Mick’s shoes weren’t far off from the Star Trek boots.

Book page from Moonage Daydream: The Life and Times of Ziggy Stardust, which was written by David Bowie and photographer Mick Rock.

Bowie in Brussels in 1978 doing (his best attempt at) the Vulcan LLAP salute, photo by Gie Knaeps.

Because I’m me, I’ve been trying to figure out what song he did this during—with certainty I can say it was during the second half of the set after the intermission. That would make it so that they were either songs from Ziggy Stardust or from Station to Station.

My guess (and it really is only a guess) is that it could have been during “TVC15.” When he performed it live he’d often sing “she’s my main creature feature” and sometimes do devil horns with his fingers and whatnot. Seems like a plausible spot, anyhow. The other one is potentially the song “Ziggy Stardust,” but just based on how he usually performed that one, such as where he’d add gestures and how he tended to convey the emotions of the song, I find it more unlikely.

But I wasn’t there and these are literally just guesses. On the off chance someone was there and that they inexplicably remember this, I would love to know.

Gates McFadden, before being Beverley Crusher in Star Trek: The Next Generation, was the choreographer for the film Labyrinth, where of course Bowie played Jareth the Goblin King.

And to avoid possible confusion, she was not the choreographer for "Magic Dance" at least when it came to Bowie's moves, as that was Charles Augin. She was, however, the choreographer for "As The World Falls Down" with the ballroom scene.

Lyrics from one of the Tin Machine albums (Bowie’s band in the late 80s-early 90s, which Bowie wrote most of the lyrics for, minus a few songs).

Additionally Iman, who Bowie met in 1990 and married in 1992, was in Star Trek: The Undiscovered Country as Martia. She was on set filming at least in April of 1991 in LA, as you can see in this filming schedule I found on an auction website. I don’t know how long she was filming for, though.

(Side note, Bowie was in LA at least towards the end of April/beginning May as he talked about how he and Iman saw the riots that happened then. No I’m not saying he visited the set, since for one Shatner says he never met Bowie, but I still think it’s neat he was generally around when she was filming).

And a little snippet from one article (the screenshot is from one of those interview compilation books).

It’s not actually that much in the grand scheme of things and more than anything just shows that Bowie was a fan of the show. It should also be remembered that Star Trek wasn’t ever really cited as a huge influence for him in terms of aesthetic, which is a rather common assumption people make, but I thought that these were fun nonetheless. I’m sure I also missed/forgot stuff, so if I come across more I'll probably add to this later on.

[georgefairbrother]

This is the fourth in our occasional series featuring luminaries of stage and screen with a strong personal and/or professional connection with Northeast England, inspired with thanks by @robbielewis. Previous profiles were of Jean Heywood, John Nightingale and Edward Wilson. This time, Sunderland born actor siblings Malcolm and Catherine Terris.

Malcolm Terris was born on January 11th, 1941, boarded at Barnard Castle School in County Durham, then worked as a cadet journalist at the Sunderland Echo before training as an actor.

He was active on British television from 1963, his style perfectly suited to larger than life characters, and is possibly best remembered for his role as Great War veteran and salt-of the-earth union leader, Matt Headley, in 34 episodes of the Tyneside interwar social-realism drama, When the Boat Comes In.

As Matt Headley, with James Bolam (Jack Ford) in When the Boat Comes In.

His more than 120 recorded screen credits include a variety of British television programmes, including Fall of Eagles, Doctor Who (Horns of Nimon, 1979), Reilly: Ace of Spies, three separate roles in Coronation Street, Our Friends in the North, The Bill, and a regular role in Rockliffe’s Babies. His final appearance was in Midsomer Murders in 2011.

His big screen appearances include as ship’s surgeon, with Anthony Hopkins as Bligh and Mel Gibson as Fletcher Christian, in The Bounty (1984), with Ricky Tomlinson in Mike Bassett: England Manager, and in Dickie Attenborough’s Chaplin, which starred Robert Downey Jnr in the title role. He has also appeared on stage including in productions of Othello and in a Broadway production of Hamlet.

He passed away at the artistes residential care home, Denville Hall, on June 6th, 2020, aged 79.

Catherine Terris was born in 1948, and trained at the London Academy of Music and Dramatic Art (LAMDA). She has been active in British television since 1972, appearing with her brother in seven episodes of When the Boat Comes In. Her other television work includes Z Cars, two roles in Coronation Street, Anna Karenina, Inspector Morse, Dalziel and Pascoe, Heartbeat, George Gently, and a regular role (15 episodes) in William and Mary with Martin Clunes and Julie Graham. She also appeared in the hugely successful feature film, The Best Exotic Marigold Hotel.

According to her page on the Coronation Street fan site, Corriepedia:

"...On stage she has appeared in productions of Faustus, A Rite Kwik Metal Tata, Andy Capp, Tight at the Back, Rose, Tom Jones, Billy Liar, Queuing for Everest and Into the Blue..."

Her most recent television screen credit is In the Club (BBC 2014-16) and latest big screen appearance was in the 2021 feature film, Martyrs Lane.

On stage with Sarah Gordy MBE (The A Word, Ralph and Katie) in the 2016 Arcola Theatre production of Into the Blue, written by Beverley Hancock and directed by Deborah Paige. Image from Sarah Gordy's official site.

[seabreeze2022]

Wales day 6 and 7, August 2024.

Today we trek to a Castle in Caernarfon on the Wales mainland. Neil and Beverley have seen this multiple times so they did some shopping in town while Nancy and I did a 1 hour self guided tour.

Neat little town, this was a four day weekend and it was busy.

You can’t go to Caernarfon without going to the “Black Boy Inn.” As the sign says, built in 1522. Making it one of the oldest pubs in Wales. To pit in perspective, 254 years before America was founded.

This is the front door.

Neil and Nancy bellying up to the bar while putting in our order of Guinness.

Round two….

Wales is known for their love of poetry. They have a yearly competition where the winner is presented with a one of a kind hand built chair. Here I am sitting in one from a bygone era.

From the “Black Boy Inn” we headed to a great Indian food dinner. I thought it a bit strange that a sign in the entry said “no personal sodas allowed.” Turns out being muslim they did not sell alcohol. So you were allowed to bring in your own beer, just not sodas.

Day 7 morning walk. One of many wild flowers, vines and blackberries along the walk.

Neil’s twin sister Janet and her son’s dog joined us for the walk this morning. The day prior we ran into one of Neil’s neighbors near Saint Ceidio’s Church. She mentioned she had the key to the church and helped keep an eye on it. When stopped at her house and retrieved the key that day. She was kind enough to invite us in. She and her husband had taken an old water mill that was in ruins and rebuilt a beautiful house out of it. So today we will get inside of the church.

This church is a 19th century church built on a site that may have been used as a church as long ago as 630 ad. This church was rebuilt using the stones from a 14 th century church previously sitting here.

West wall with its bellcote.

Neil with the key to the door. The round headed doorway may be from the 14th century.

This church has not been in use for many years. So we had to knock down several spiderwebs. Neil made himself at home in the pulpit. Which he had also done in the church in New Bedford, Mass. Which was featured in the movie Moby Dick.

In the back of the church was a stretcher used to carry caskets to the graveyard.

An inscription on slate in the memory of a 21 year old who died in 1802.

Dropped the key off at the old mill which is now a house.

Janet, Charlie and Nancy checking a pasture on the way home. Hurry up we don’t want to miss tea time!

After lunch we drove to the north shore of Anglesey to look at this lighthouse on the point to the right.

Point Lynas lighthouse is very unique. Since it is plenty high to see from the sea. It is built into the wall of the building with light only visible for 180 degrees.

The walk to the lighthouse.

The gate leading to the lighthouse. There are a couple of rooms that you can rent here. Not sure how nice those expensive rooms would be when the fog horn sounds.

Here is the actual light. There is a modern radar antenna, and anemometer on the roof. The ship pilots used this point to help ships getting to Liverpool. The pilot station was built in 1776. This light was built in 1835 which is visible for 18 nautical miles.

A heather covered hillside leading to the water. One seal was visible nearby.

Windy out here on the point.

View from the point back towards the lighthouse.

Neil in the heather.

Neil working the lath in his shop, which he let Nancy try her hand at. One more night watching “Rawhide” then we leave on the ferry the next day for Dublin. What a great vacation, thanks to Neil and Beverley Gadsby.

[smithgreys]

Ben horne room arranger

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(Tollerton, North Yorkshire)ĭr Paul Lasseter Phillips CBE. Chief Executive Officer, Outwood Grange Academies Trust. Chairman and Managing Director, Balmoral Group. (Kincardine, Fife)ĭr James Smith Milne CBE DL. Chief Constable, Police Service of Scotland. For services to Financial Services, to Technology and to Public Service. For services to Diversity and Inclusion in Art. Chief Executive, Leeds Teaching Hospitals NHS Trust. (London, Greater London)ĭr Andrew Francis Goddard. (Worcester, Worcestershire)īradley Fried. For services to Museums, to Publishing and to the Creative Industries. Wolfson Chair, Professor of Materials, University of Oxford. Lately Provost and President, University College London. For services to the Arts, particularly during Covid-19. Lady Susan Carroll Sainsbury Of Turville CBE. Director, Kennedy Institute of Rheumatology. Principal and Vice-Chancellor, University of St Andrews. For services to Young People and to Philanthropy. (London, Greater London)ĭr Ann Geraldine Limb CBE. For services to Business and to the Hospitality Industry. For services to the community in Northern Ireland. Lord-Lieutenant, County Borough of Belfast. (Llanelli, Carmarthenshire)įionnuala Mary Jay-O’Boyle CBE. Geoffrey Moorhouse-Gibson and Royal Society Professor of Chemistry, University of Cambridge. For services to Young People and to Charity. Visiting Professor, UCL Institute of Education, Chair, Future First and Camden Learning. Lately First Minister of Northern Ireland. For services to Nursing, Midwifery, and the NHS. Chief Nursing Officer for England, NHS England and NHS Improvement. (Midhurst, West Sussex)ĭames Commander of the Order of the British Empire (DBE)ĭr Ruth Rosemarie Beverley (Ruth May). Permanent Secretary, Department for Transport. (London, Greater London)ĭames Commander of the Order of the Bath (DCB)īernadette Mary Kelly CB. Knights Commander of the Order of the Bath (KCB)Ĭharles Fergusson Roxburgh. Lately Chair, Nuclear Innovation Research Advisory Board, and Honorary President, National Skills Academy for Nuclear. (London, Greater London)ĭames Grand Cross of the Order of the British Empire (GBE)ĭame Susan Elizabeth Ion DBE. Professor of English and Creative Writing, Birkbeck College, University of London and Distinguished Fellow, All Souls College, University of Oxford. (London, Greater London)ĭame Marina Sarah Warner CBE. Members of the Order of the Companions of Honour (CH) The percentage of LGBT recipients is down slightly from last year, from 5.0% to 4.6%. The proportion going to people from ethnic minority backgrounds, 13.3%, is down from a record 15.0% last year, while slightly more are going to people who are disabled. Read more: The stories of the North East community heroes honoured in the Queens' Birthday listĪ record proportion of Queen’s Birthday Honours are going to women, the percentage this year – 51.5% – slightly higher than the previous record of 51.2% set in 2015. Those behind the selection process said there was more consideration for people who have represented themes such as youth engagement, the environment and sustained public service to mark the monarch’s milestone. People from the world of showbiz, sport and politics have been recognised on a list that claims to represent the monarch's 'invaluable' qualities, long with scientists, educators, volunteers and more. Famous names sit next to those of everyday heroes from across the UK in the Queen's birthday honours list. horoscopes * Choose among Placidus, Koch, and Equal House systems * Choose your own Orb sizes to. StarScopes is designed to help you view the horoscopes for any. astrology charts and horoscope interpretations.

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[sexualintimidationdemon]

Day 20

Reflections on: Halloween Kills (2021)

This takes place immediately after Halloween (2018). You should watch that before watching this or you’ll definitely be pretty confused!

John Carpenter’s music was perfect, as always. I got goosebumps after only the first couple of piano and synth notes :)

I appreciated the flashbacks to Halloween night 1978 which showed new scenes that were concurrent with the events of Halloween (1978). This was a rare well-done retcon that successfully deepened the modern character’s motivations and provided richer context for the present story. 

Like the previous film this was written by Danny McBride and David Gordon Green, yet it was missing their signature humour. I wished there was a little more levity in this. It’s pretty brutal, even for a slasher!

Anthony Michael Hall plays Tommy - the little boy Laurie (Jamie Lee Curtis) babysat in the original film. He is UNRECOGNIZABLE as the Tony Hall you know and love. A shot of his face lit up by red light cuts immediately to a shot of a jack-o-lantern (see both above). After this comparison I couldn’t imagine him as anything other than a pumpkin. 

I will never look at a fluorescent light bulb the same way again.

Kyle Richards (who you may know as one of The Real Housewives of Beverley Hills or possibly from Watcher in the Woods (1980)) reprises her role from the 1978 Halloween as Lindsey, one of a few survivors of Michael Myers. I liked the addition of side characters who were personally affected by the events of the first film. Of course their lives were irrevocably altered 40 years ago, and as a result some of them feel like they must now be the heroes of the story. If I survived Mikey M. as a kid I think I would have moved far far away from Haddonfield, Illinois - probably to an uncharted island surrounded by sharks and mines.

One of my horror movie pet peeves is the ridiculously inaccurate depiction of hospitals. Morgues are not designed in a way that a murder victim’s mother can accidentally discover the body of her disfigured child through a window in a busy hallway! COME ON! Hospital chaos was the most stressful part of this film for me. A mob of angry townspeople including doctors and nurses trample people and knock each other down stairwells. Medical students take the Hippocratic Oath to, “first, do no harm”. COME ON!

An over-the-top (even for Halloween) rich couple (see above) now lives in Michael Myers’ childhood home. They are Big John, a honey-pondering, stoned jazz daddy, and Little John, a pirate daddy played by MADtv’s Michael McDonald. I’m sorry I know he’s been in many other things since then, but I will always associate him with that problematic show and Zima (a drink I’ve actually encountered only once - weirdly in Kochi, Japan). How do I know they’re rich? Sure, the house was probably cheap to buy as it was the site of multiple murders, but they’ve obviously put a lot of money into renovations. They also leave FOUR lamps on in their upstairs bedroom while they watch a movie downstairs. I did love that they were watching Minnie and Moskowitz (1971) by John Cassavetes - a perfect choice for Halloween night. 

Laurie, albeit “geeked out on pain meds” tells Tommy to go find and kill Michael Myers. I know she’s not his babysitter anymore and Tommy is a fully grown adult, but this is still terrible, irresponsible advice. Laurie!!

I know I said I liked the addition of all the side characters but there might actually be too many characters in this!

The soundtrack includes an Anne Murray song?! Scary! The fact that I was able to identify an Anne Murray song - horrifying!!!

One adult survivor character gives an order to two teens (in an attempt to protect them!) that follows the same logic from Children of the Corn (1983): “[If] you see anything suspicious - you honk the horn.” Have these people learned nothing?! Honking?!

As just noted in Anamorph (2007), we are again presented with several gruesome tableaus. Why are serial killers such creative installation artists?! Are they taking some sort of online course?? Good for them!

[victoria-daydreams]

Skylark

GIF by @silent-force

Summary: Living in the midst of a war while working to make ends meet was nothing new to Alice Lloyd. That was until a chance meeting between her and a RAF pilot would forever change both their lives.

Word Count: 1.7k

A/N: So this is my first time posting a story on this site and I’m slightly nervous about it. But I had to write this story because it’s been my head for months now. I also wanted to write it because I have not seen any Dunkirk stories with a Black/POC character which is understandable to a point. Anyways, I hope you like it to those who read it.

Sitting backstage at The Garden Rouge Club sat Alice Lloyd humming to herself as she concentrated on painting her lips red with lipstick. Alice screwed her lipstick down and placed the cap back on before placing it on the desk of the vanity mirror. Opening her mouth, Alice looked at her reflection, making sure there was not any lipstick on her teeth. The upbeat sound of jazz music being played from the band onstage was muffled, but yet Alice could still feel it vibrate into her ears, bounce off the walls, and emanate from the floor.

Alice stood up from her seat at the mirror and closed her eyes, placing her hands on her stomach and breathing deeply. Her heart began to race at the thought of her upcoming performance. The feeling of butterflies had entered her stomach as well. Alice had performed multiple times at the club, so she didn't understand why she was always nervous before each performance.

Out of nowhere, two pale hands landed on each of Alice's shoulders causing her eyes to snap open in fright.

"Why do you do this to yourself every time?" a man asked laughing.

"You ass!" Alice cursed, softly elbowing him in the ribs. "You scared the living daylights out of me James!" she added, shaking his hands off her shoulders.

James Allen's droopy gray eyes crinkled as he grinned proudly, shoving his hands into his pockets. He towered over Alice short stature of only five-five as the two of them looked at their reflection.

"You're going to do amazing Alice," the dark-haired man assured. "As you always do," he added, with a smile on his face.

"I know, but I always get a little anxious before I go on stage," she stated, shaking her head.

James breathed out a laugh, "Well think of it this way," he began, placing his hands on her shoulders again. "Even if you make a mistake onstage, the crowd won't notice because they'll be too enamored with this beautiful face," he stated, lifting her chin up with two of his fingers. "You look gorgeous Alice,"

Alice looked down and smoothed her red halter cocktail dress that complimented her warm, almond brown complexion.

She looked up at him with a small smile on her face, "You think so?" she asked, nervously running a hand through the black, glossy waves of her hair.

"Of course!" James said, sounding playfully exasperated. "Now come on, you don't want to keep the crowd waiting do you?" he asked, and she shook her head as he lead her to stage right.

James gave a reassuring squeeze on her shoulder before walking away from her to return to his to stagehand duties. Alice slightly peeped her head out to see the club was in full swing as couples danced happily on the dance floor. The band played the final note of their number and a loud applause echoed in the hall.

"Allow me to introduce our very own Miss Alice Lloyd,"

Alice walked onto the stage, waving and smiling at the audience as she made her way to the microphone.

"Let's keep this party going shall we?" she asked enthusiastically, and the crowd cheered in agreement.

She grasped onto the microphone as the rhythmic beating of the drum started up soon followed by the blaring of trumpet horns. Alice tapped her foot to the beat and smiled as she sang the opening line to 'Marvellous Party'.

Alice's eyes scanned through the smoky atmosphere of the club, watching friends and couples dance wildly and whirl each other around the dance floor. It brought a smile to her face as she snapped along to the verse she was singing. It was at this moment Alice's bright brown eyes met a pair of intense blue eyes looking back at her. The man had blond tousled hair and looked to be her age if not a little older. Feeling bold, Alice sent the man a playful wink as she continued on with her singing.

Belting out the last note, the room was filled with whistles, cheers, and applause.

"I hope we're not tired out there," Alice began, as the band started playing their next song.

~~~x~~~

After singing two more songs Alice exited the stage, but the band kept the party going. She made her to the bar, maneuvering through the packed crowd as best as she could. Finally at the bar, all Alice had to do was lift one finger and the bartender nodded his head as he had her order memorized.

"Thank you!" she called gratefully, as the bartender walked away after handing her a gin.

Drinking deeply, Alice leaned against the bar observing the club-goers, nodding her head along the upbeat song that was being performed. Until a voice from beside startled her.

"Ye sounded lovely up there," a Scottish-accented voice stated.

Alice whipped her head to the right and looked up to see the blond-haired man from earlier. The man smiled at her revealing his dimples in both of his cheeks, he had quite a boyish face. In Alice's opinion, the man was quite handsome. The man lifted an eyebrow at her silence and Alice cleared her throat as she felt heat flush her face from embarrassment for studying the man's features too long.

"Thank you," she finally said, a smile pulling on her lips. "I'm glad you enjoyed it," she added, with a slight nod.

An awkward silence fell between the two of them and Alice lowered her head before taking another sip of her gin. Sneakily, she glanced over at the blond-haired man who was staring out into the crowd. When she was on the stage the man was sitting alone, and now here he was next to her still by himself. Alice began to wonder if the man came here with no friends.

"Did you come here alone?" Alice asked curiously, and he turned his head toward her.

“ Yes,"

"That's quite sad," Alice stated mindlessly, downing the rest of her drink.

The man chuckled, "Ouch," he commented, putting his hand over his heart.

Alice's eyes widened and she placed her drink down, "Oh my goodness, that's not what I meant," she apologized, shaking her head. "I wasn't calling you sad, I meant no offense sir," she clarified, waving her hands.

The man lightly laughed and shook his head, "No offense taken," he assured. "I found it rather amusing lass," he added, a smile on his lips. "Jack Collins," he introduced, sticking his hand out.

Alice smiled, relief flooding through her like a tidal wave, "Alice," she responded, shaking his hand. "Alice Lloyd," Smiling at one another, the two of them slid onto the bar stools that were next to them. "So what brought you to the Garden Rouge Mr. Collins?" Alice asked, somewhat playfully as she had her gin refilled.

Jack lifted his stout, "I came for a drink," he answered, before taking a long pull from it.

"You could've went to a pub if that's all you wanted," she pointed out, a chuckle escaping her lips.

"I suppose so, but a pub doesn't have the same lively ambiance a club does," he quipped, with a smirk.

Alice shrugged and nodded in agreement, "But going to a nightclub by yourself would be rather boring wouldn't it?" she posed, raising her glass to her lips. "I mean where are your lads?" she asked, putting the cup down.

Alice noticed that Jack's smile seemed to drop a little at her question and soon began to sense a change in his demeanor.

"They're gone," he answered, while examining the wood of the bar counter. "Off fightin in the war," he added, a distant look in his eyes.

"Oh," Alice breathed, in shock. "And you were left behind due to being rejected for medical reasons?" she guessed, her tone soft.

Jack shook his head, "No lass," he said. "I'm a pilot in the Royal Air Force," Jack corrected, lifting his head to finally look at her. "I'm just on leave," he added.

"Ahhh, a fly boy," Alice stated, tilting her head with a grin. "Well in that case, thank you for your service," she smiled, raising her glass which made a tiny grin appear on Jack's face. "I once thought about serving this country as a nurse, but it seems Britain would rather let Nazis invade the country before they ever accept a colored nurse," Alice joked bitterly, before sipping her drink and watching everyone still on the floor dancing or socializing.

"This job looks teh be more fun in my opinion," he commented, with a slight shrug.

Alice laughed, "It has its moments, when the pay is good," she replied, turning her body to face him. "Before the war broke out, I wanted to be a famous singer like Billie Holiday," she told him, resting her arm on the counter. "But now...it doesn't matter, war or no war, the chances of me singing professionally are slim," she finished shaking her head.

"I don't see why ye couldn't. Ye certainly have the pipes for it," Jack complimented.

"Thank you Jack," Alice said, a small smile forming on her lips. "But colored people don't achieve fame easily, even if we're talented," she added, shaking her head. Alice pushed herself off the bar stool, her feet hitting the floor with a soft click of her heels. "I best get back to work," she said, glancing over her shoulder at the stage. "I doubt my boss would be pleased to see me not doing what he hired me for," she chuckled, interlocking her fingers in front of her.

“It was nice meeting ye Alice," Jack said, smiling brightly at her.

"And you as well Jack," she told him. "Maybe I'll you see around here again. Hopefully, with friends," Alice jested, before walking away from him.

A/N: If this garners enough attention I’ll probably write the second chapter or maybe even if it doesn’t I’ll probably still post the second chapter just to get this story out of my head

Chapter Two

[starship-imzadi]

S4 E20 Qpid

I love the little horn theme that plays under Picard's introduction (it sounds like a version of the musical introduction of the TNG crew in the film Generations )

This first scene is... really dull. Some of it is exposition but still.

Oh man, this is so incredibly awkward and admittedly funny. Beverly handled it very well.

I think this is the first honest to god flirt Riker has attempted the entire season. There's the one point in "Data's Day" where he's telling a story on the bridge and Data wonders at Riker's success with humour, but it's not really evident that Riker is flirting, just that he's animated.

The way Riker says "it would be my pleasure" to show Vash around the rest of the ship reminds me of when he flirted with Guinan; he knows Vash is Picard's friend so he's not looking for more (he respects boundaries as such) but he still just enjoys other people's company and repartee.

"a captain does not reveal his personal feelings to his crew" and yet, ultimately he does.

The truth is, Q was probably bored.. It's funny how he arranged himself on the furniture.

Despite Picard insisting he remain detached and professional, his crew knows him well and four seasons in they have a definite bond; case in point: Picard need only mention Q and Riker knows all of his feelings on the matter.

Look, Picard had regular pillows.

I like Picard's little Robin Hood facial hair. Better yet, I love how he helps himself to Riker's tunic, pulling on it and examining it.

I see Beverley had a small blade of some kind. Though she never gets to use it. From what I've read, Gates, Marina, and Patrick were the three cast members with weapons stage combat but none of the women were allowed swords (because of sexist bastards behind the scenes).

Those archers have really bad aim.

Let's be honest, Vash can take care of herself. She doesn't need Picard.

I'm not sure if Vash enraged Q or turned him on. Or a bit of both. Vash really isn't Picard's "type".

Q can be such a nuisance but I really enjoy John De Lancie.

The hooded cloak works for Riker but Data's a bit pale and Geordie's visor doesn't let him hide for a second. Riker give off definite jedi vibes and I dig it.

All three boys get swords and the girls get... pots. Riker seems to have lost his sword in favor of his staff.

Vash and Q are perfect for each other.

[allaboutmywriting]

Walking the Gallery

can’t afford to go to Harry’s tour lol nothing new so writing this instead--gonna be some chapters, not sure how many yet || 5k words 

Lexy Marks is a recent novelist, who has risen to a reasonable amount of fame for a first-time fiction writer. She ends up at an album release party Harry Styles has thrown, where he tells her how much he loves her writing. Back in the day, Lexy was a 1D stan; unfortunately, she has some trauma related to that particular era of her life. 

CHAPTER ONE:

The check engine light came on as soon as could at least see the stoplights hanging from the intersection behind the row of cars in front of her—whoever had warned her about LA traffic certainly hadn't been joking—and Lexy screamed in frustration when she saw it. With her foot on the brake, she slammed her hands against the steering wheel, in the same manner that she was privy to throwing her phone on the ground whenever it froze. It was a method that never solved the problem, but always made her feel as if it did.

Her father had assured her, incorrectly it would appear, that her 2007 Toyota Corolla would be fine for the six-thousand-mile trip she was taking around the country—from Columbia to Los Angeles, Los Angeles back to Charleston. She'd already completed half of the journey there, but she couldn't exactly complete the other half back with a faulty engine.

The car behind her beeped its horn and Lexy jumped, pressing her foot too fast on the gas, jolting forward uncomfortably. She hadn't expected the traffic to be quite so bad, and she wasn't prepared for the traffic gridlock. She sighed and looked at the clock. 5:57.

She was meant to be there by 6:00. She didn't really know what the where was, somewhere in between Beverly Hills and a direction of Hollywood. She supposed she could've been smarter by not driving in rush hour traffic. Perhaps she could've asked the event holders if she could have arrived in the morning. Surely, they'd have understood that people hailing from the East Coast were not as smooth, talented, or put together as those on the Golden Coast.

The car in front of her moved up a foot. She turned the radio down and scrolled until she found her dad's contact. It was after eight on the East Coast, so he would be home from work. Probably in the kitchen making himself a sandwich with the unhealthy kind of bread and too much mayonnaise—he liked to play around with cholesterol.

"Lexy-loo!" he greeted. She smiled, already feeling at ease from hearing his booming voice. He was a middle school science teacher, the goofy kind, so he said everything with strange inflections and accents. This time, he sounded Irish. "Where the hell are ya?"

"Stuck in traffic." She glanced at the GPS he'd installed for her eighteenth birthday a few years before. It was the nicest part of her car, and it looked awfully out of place compared to the rest of it. She was somewhere in East Hollywood, which contrary to the name, was a little more rundown than she expected it to be. "This has to be even worse than New York."

He laughed, having spent his summers growing up in Brooklyn, back when the twin towers were still a part of the skyline. "You hanging with the rich and famous yet?"

Lexy glared down at her lap, pushing the gas gently as the next car moved forward. She didn't have the time to explain the intricacies of the area to her dad, to let him know that there were entirely more poor people in the area than celebrities, and that she would probably never even come in contact with someone of such a demographic. In fact, after the event or reading or whatever she had tonight, Lexy had half a mind to go handing out food to all of the people she saw on the sides of the street.

"Not yet, Dad." Her calf was starting to ache from staying on the brake for so long, and she tried to stretch it in place the best she could. "Anyway, check engine light just came on and I don't know what to do."

"Huh," he grunted. "Well, is it steady or is it blinking?"

"Steady."

"Did it just come on?"

"About a minute ago." She shuffled her seatbelt around to keep it from digging into her neck.

"Is your car acting up? jerky?"

"No. it seems normal. I can't really tell, though. Traffics at a standstill."

"Well, it's probably not an emergency then. Go find yourself an Auto Zone and they'll do a diagnostic for free. Call me back once they tell you and we'll figure something out."

She frowned at probably not an emergency, her mind speculating as it was prone to, visions of her car exploding in the middle of the LA freeway.

"I don't think I can do it today," Lexy frowned. "I have an event in three minutes."

"Glad to see that the extra three hours has increased your timeliness," he joked and Lexy rolled her eyes. "Just do it first thing tomorrow," he said nonchalantly, yawning. "I'm so proud of you, Lex. Living out your dream. I wish I could be there with you."

She wanted to roll down her window, to lay her arm across it the same way she might have back home, but she took the threats of pollution seriously.

She said a goodbye to her father quickly. Her eyes were already stinging. Lexy was so far from home and so alone. It had just been her and her dad for so long, even while she was busy in college, but he couldn't leave the school for the weeks the tour had taken her, would take her, for fear that the district would fire him. Ain't no rest for a public-school teacher, that's for sure.

Lexy had managed to do thirty-seven different readings without him. Had managed to impress thirty-seven different crowds of people without offending them—had even managed to make a few of them cry. Her twitter and Instagram followers had increased gradually, so that now she had a small following of few thousand, that rivalled the accounts of her high school valedictorian who'd gone on to become an influencer selling tanning lotion.

While Lexy really was living out her dream, having a New York Times bestseller at twenty-two, becoming an author wasn't as glamorous as she always thought it would. Her settlement for the book, which was supposed to be $55,000, after taxes only came out to a little more than half of that, and now she understood why authors talked about how difficult it was to make a living just writing. There were no health benefits in authorhood, and there were no extravagances where bookstores paid her to come talk. Here she was, six months out of college, driving herself around in her own car just for her inaugural book tour.

Who cared if Barack Obama had put her book on his recommended reads of the year, when her car was going to break down and she was going to be late for her first event in Los Angeles?

As the clock shown 6:04, Lexy finally was able to pass through the intersections. Now, if she could just figure out how to change lanes, she'd be doing okay.

&&

Her car started smoking as she turned onto the street. It was framed by huge houses with gates in front—black ones, silver ones, some with outright walls so that you couldn't see what was happening on the other side. About halfway down the street, and with the smoke darkening, her GPS said she arrived.

Just what was this event? Her fingers were itching for her phone, to call her publicist and make sure she was at the right place, but a security guard appeared just by her driver's side window.

He was a big and buff bald-headed man who gave her car a dirty look as he instructed her to roll down a window. He raised an eyebrow at her. "Statement of purpose?"

Statement of what?

It was really starting to feel like she imagined the White House felt like after all—back in the Obama days, not the current ones.

"Hi. My name is Lexy Marks. I've been told to be here."

"ID?"

She grumbled to herself as she reached forward and went through her purse, her fingers shaking as she took at her wallet, and then her driver's license. Her fingers were shaking, but she didn't know why she should be the nervous one.

He cross-checked her license with whatever was on the tablet he was holding, then nodded at her. "Pull around back. You should see the other cars. Park between the two on the back row."

Lexy took back her license, rolled up her window, and waited at the gates until the swung open. Her car continued to smoke so bad that she could see it even through the darkening tones of dusk. The house, which she gawked up at, was black and modern, with gaping windows. There were three stories from what she could tell—Lexy had never seen such a nice place, much less been invited to one.

She tried to park in between the cars the guard had instructed her to—a white Audi and one of several black rovers. These cars were all worth more than her manuscript was, and especially more than she was.

And Lexy had always been awful at parking. Never mind how awful she felt about being late, and how dreadful her stomach felt with her engine smoking.

She couldn't tell just how dark it really was outside due to the multiple lanterns and light fixtures that illuminated the entire outdoor parking space. She was most certainly late, but she wasn't even sure what this event was. She didn't know if they would even notice, if this was an event with other authors, if she was meant to be giving just a reading. Her publicist—Simon & Schuster had given her one along with her royalties' contract—had set up the whole tour for her. All she had to do was arrive on time. And here she was, a half hour late, and if her GPS was right, somewhere between West Hollywood and Beverley Hills.

But weren't the rich and famous known for not being on time?

As she climbed the steps to the front porch, she was certain she was at a mansion. Just whose mansion, she wasn't sure, but she was more conscious, if she ever had been before tonight, of the twenty-dollar black Old Navy dress she was wearing. She'd thought she was being frugal, chic, stylish. She'd even paired them with her favorite pair of chunky blue heels. But now she was certain it couldn't be further from than truth.

There was no one in the yard with her. Across the lane was the security guard, and Lexy contemplated waving him down and asking for directions. Suck it up, she told herself. You're living the dream.

A white cat was perched on the front step and it watched her, lazily, as she knocked twice on the front door. When there was no answer, she rang the doorbell.

There was music coming from inside, banging beats that made it seem like she was entering into a dorm. They were exactly the kind of loud that she heard in college on nights out, at house parties, or in the frats. She couldn't make it out exactly—either that or she didn't know the songs.

When she knocked a second time, the door was sprung open.

"Ay, welcome to the party of the century," A well-dressed man greeted her. He sounded Australian, but Lexy couldn't be certain—she was the worst at deciphering accents. But he was dressed in suspenders and a white t-shirt that read SOUTHERNE in black, bold letters. Behind him, Lexy could see a bunch of people standing around, talking. None of them were dancing, as she had incorrectly assumed from the music, but instead, standing around listening to the tracks.

And now Lexy was certain she had never heard it before.

"Hello? You there?" The man asked again. This time he grinned at her and revealed a set of teeth so perfect they were probably veneers. If Lexy had to choose a new occupation, it would be dentistry. But she was awful at science, math, and everything in between that would lead her to becoming one.

"Sorry." She tried to smile back, but her annoyance ran strong through her veins.

A few of the people around them, beautiful people, women with the sort of hair that didn't have flyaways and men that looked like they came from the cover of GQ turned to look at her curiously, but the company must've been important, because they looked away again.

"I'm Lexy Marks. I was told to come here by my publicist."

She cringed as she thought about how it must sound to this man—acting like her publicist was in charge of her. Much like a parent leading their child to the first day of kindergarten. It was just like her publicist to do this. She knew how unexperienced Lexy was and had been known to take advantage of it before—her first reading in the mid-west had been at a senior home for people who had never read her book.

But his smile only widened, and he opened the door up even further.

"Come in, come in," he said, waving an arm in front of him. He held a wine glass in his left hand. Dark and red, the kind she hated. "I'm Greg."

Well, she could guess that Greg was not the person she was meant to meet here. He didn’t have any idea who she was. But she stepped inside the door anyway, the music amplified, and Lexy had to stop herself from abruptly gaping at the beautiful scene before her. Beautiful hardwood floors that had been stained white, walls so beautifully decorated they looked straight out of a gallery, the people all around her who were so beautiful and dressed so well they might as well be models themselves.

It felt like something straight out of The Great Gatsby.

Greg nudged her arm. "Let's get you a drink, yeah? Have you eaten? We've got loads of stuff in the kitchen."

Lexy shook her head as he followed him through the crowd, saying hi to people as he went. She was almost positive he was Australian.

Lexy hoped she would recognize someone in the crowd, but these were not the sort of people she knew. She even tried to place the voice singing because she had most certainly heard it before but couldn't do it for the life of her. It sounded pop-y and generic, the sort she would've made out to in a club back in college.

"You're lucky I was walking right by the door," Greg continued, stepping beside her once the crowd was sparse enough to allow for it. There must be over a hundred people in the building. All of the windows were covered by long, flowing silver curtains; there was even a balcony that people hung off of. All they needed was a sprawling indoor people.

"What do you do, Lexy? Singer? Actress? Dancer? Triple threat?"

"Um, author, actually."

"Oh yeah?" he turned to grin at her. "Poetry?"

Lexy felt like she was disappointing him. "Fiction."

They entered the kitchen, after feeling like they had walked a quarter of a mile from the front door. The house hadn't actually looked this large from the outside and Lexy wondered if it was the fact that they'd had to navigate all of the people standing in the way.

And this time Lexy did look around with her mouth open. "Oh wow."

The countertops were black marble, and stretched the entire length of the room, which was probably half the size of her house back in South Carolina. The floor was still stained white wood, and the kitchen had double islands in the center, one of which was adorned with drinks—the other with sweets.

It was a kitchen so perfect she would've never been able to dream it up. Lexy couldn't cook—at all really, but if she could, this was exactly the sort of kitchen she'd want.

"Harry," Greg called, almost lazily, to a man in yellow pants and white t-shirt, who was looking out of the kitchen window. "I've brought you a guest."

He turned around to face her, and Lexy furrowed her eyebrows at the man standing there, then her eyebrows shot straight up to her forehead when she finally recognized him.

And all of a sudden, she was right back to being in ninth grade, fighting over which of her friends laid claim to the man standing before her. Hell, Lexy used to keep her toothbrush in a cup with the man's face on it.

His hair, a deep brown, not unlike her own, was wavy and perfectly placed—the definition of artist's hair. His skin was the sort of clear she only ever got when she was wearing a full face of make-up, and immediately, from the time his eyes first landed on her, he seemed to exude charisma.

"Hi," she said shyly.

"What's your name?" He smiled politely at her, without showing his teeth, and Lexy's heart dropped at the thought that she wasn't really meant to be here. Her ten minutes of existing on the estate had made her feel some sort of emotion towards the place.

But how could she be after all? Standing in Harry Styles' extravagant kitchen, in what was most likely his exorbitant mansion, at an event that was clearly some sort of Hollywood party.

She was meant to be reading.

"Uh, I'm Lexy," she stammered. "Lexy Marks."

His eyes bugged out when she said it, but he quickly recovered enough to grin at her, dimples on full show, just like the media trained mega star he was. And though he certainly looked more grown-up than Lexy remembered him as, his smile was the same as it was on her toothbrush cup from all those years ago.

He took a few steps forward and held out his hand to her, fingers covered in rings and pink and blue painted nails. She took it. "I'm Harry. I've been waiting to meet you—you're the guest of honor."

Behind her, Greg rolled his eyes. "You're the guest of honor, mate. This is your release party."

Harry grinned at Greg, then looked back down at Lexy. "I invited a lot of people."

Lexy's heart was beating so rapidly that she was certain if she tried to speak, she would be out of breath. So, she simply nodded.

"I love Beginning with February," Harry continued, naming her title. Lexy couldn't stop staring at his damn smile. It was so perfect. Her dad could never afford braces for her, and she had a thing for people's teeth. "It's my favorite book right now. After I finished it, I immediately read it again. I must've read it eight times by now. I tell everyone it's the perfect antidote to loss and loneliness—I don't think there's anyone I've ever met who explains love and friendship and death the way you do. I've bought a whole box of copies to hand out as Christmas presents. Of course, it would be better if you signed them."

Lexy stood frozen from his exclamation—still processing the fact that she was standing in front of Harry Styles and that he had read her book. More than once.

"I had my publicist reach out to yours, and I was really hoping that I could make it out to your reading tomorrow, but unfortunately I have an interview."

He smiled at her again and Lexy knew it was her time to say something. She tried to seem cool, seem the way that any of the people in the house might would respond, but her brain only backtracked far enough for his last few sentences. "Uh…I'll read you anything you want."

Lexy wanted to punch herself at how stupid she sounded, yet again, but Greg snorted, and Harry smiled, ducking his head.

"What I mean," she rushed to explain. It was his damn smile that got her. "Is that I'll give you a private reading of whatever you want. Like—"

This was just getting worse and worse as Greg began lightly laughing. She rolled her eyes up to the ceiling, then back to meet Harry's. He was a lot taller than she'd imagined he would be, but though his lips twitched, he was giving her his entire attention.

"Thank you for your kind words," she swallowed. "Of course, I'll sign anything you want."

Harry's smile deepened, his dimples appearing. Greg pointed to the door with his thumb, and Harry nodded at him.

He turned back to Lexy, just as the song from the other room changed. This one she'd heard before—something by Lorde, that she couldn't remember the name of.

They gazed at each other, then Harry suddenly clapped his hands together. "So, can I get you anything to drink? Wine? Water? Vodka?"

She was alone with one of the most famous singers of the time. And he was offering her a drink, in his kitchen, somewhere in Los Angeles. She wasn't just living her dream; she was living the whole dream. Everyone's. All of them. A place on Barack Obama's recommended reading list could have never prepared her for this one.

"Um, water. Please?"

He nodded, and turned around to the island, taking one a wine glass, similar to the one Greg was drinking out of, from the side and filling it with water from a pitcher.

He handed it to her, then leaned against the island and picked up his own drink, something green. He was dressed so well…Lexy had always admired fashion but could never get the hang of making anything look good other than wearing neutrals and blank shirts.

"I hope you don't mind being here," he drawled slowly, his eyes on hers, darting back and forth as if trying to determine what her true feelings were. Lexy hadn't heard him talk since the height of her One Direction days, when she would watch every interview that came out multiple times, but she wondered if he had talked quite so slowly back then. "This is my album release party, for my friends, and I was quite hoping you'd do the intermission."

All…of those people…at least a hundred…were his friends? Lexy could count all her friends on both hands. She probably only talked to three of them a day.

"Intermission?"

His eyes still on hers, he nodded. "Yeah. Do you know that bit in your book, the part where Jamaica dies? You have two pages of just wonderful prose there, and I was really hoping that you would read it. Maybe halfway through the songs?" He paused in thought, his eyes rolling up. "Actually, maybe after track seven would do."

She took a big sip of the water. It was room temperature and Lexy thought, in a moment of spare humor, probably the most expensive water she'd ever drank.

But her hand was already shaking, and she doubted that she could convince herself to read in front of everyone in that other room. Well, at least. There would be no way she could control the tremors in her voice. She was used to reading in front of people who knew her, in front of people who liked her reading, who cared about her characters as much as she did.

Not in front of talented, model millionaires.

"I'm sorry. I thought this was a reading."

"It is a reading," he insisted. He ducked his head and crossed his arms and smiled at her again. Lexy had to look down to keep from disappointing him. Those damn dimples.

She felt awful turning him down. But there was so much about the day that wasn't turning out right. Her car, her first day in Los Angeles. And here she was, about to tear up in front of this singer who had to share his work with everyone.

"I'm really sorry, Harry. It's just been a long day. I really thought this was just going to be a regular reading at a bookstore. My publicist, she never really told me, like, what this event was, or I probably would've been really prepared. But I think everyone wants to listen to you. Not me." She opened her purse and pulled out the printed-out pages she'd rendered just for her readings—she didn't know a single author who didn't at least tweak their writing somewhat before reading. "I don't even have those paragraphs with me. I only have chapter one."

Harry took the creased paper from her, frowning down at it. They had her scribbles all over it. Her first chapter had a lot of dialogue, and it was never the best for reading out loud.

But from the expression on Harry's face, you'd think that she'd just taken all of the magic out of it.

She was just about to say as much when the music changed, and her ears perked up. She frowned at the beat. "Is that—"

"Yeah," Harry said, still dejectedly frowning down at the papers. "Never get far from your roots, right?"

"That's what they say," she sighed.

Harry glanced up at quizzically but didn't ask for clarification. He handed the papers back to her. "Look, if you don't want to read, you don't have to. I'd be honored if you would, but I understand if you won't."

She nodded at him, folded the papers back in her bag, and took another sip of her water.

"Harry, love," a man called, walking into the kitchen. This man had brown hair and a long face, and a dark-haired woman at his side. Both of them were dressed—much better than she was.

Harry's face lit up and he set his glass on the counter. "Mitch! Maia! Well, you both look lovely!"

He walked over to them and Lexy took a step back, observing the way he interacted with them. The couple seemed completely at ease around him and it was obvious they'd known each other a while. Before Harry could turn to introduce her to them, Lexy had already set her water on the counter and left the room. She skirted in between the crowds of people, wondering why she'd always thought black was the classiest of colors, yet literally everyone in the room was dressed colorfully. That familiar urge to run away was strong, and she just told herself to get out of the room, and that no one would remember her.

The last chords of What Makes You Beautiful ended, and she vaguely registered the sound of something else start—an older tune, one that she was certain she'd heard before.

There was a group of people standing by the door, but she was able to open it and get out by not paying attention to the looks that they gave her.

More people were out on the porch. Did Harry really have that many friends? They were all laughing, clearly happy to be invited, and here she was running away.

She took the steps two at a time and nearly knocked herself over, sprinting to her car. She yanked open the door and got inside, slamming it back closed. She pressed the lock button, then tried to regain control of her breathing.

There were moments in life that suddenly took her over. It had been like that her entire life. When the air from her lungs would disappear and suddenly feel like there was a valve closed. And while she did have asthma when she was younger, she knew that this wasn't that. She took deep, deep breaths and tried to regain herself.

But the pain was too strong. It came quickly, the way her wrist broke in fourth grade when she fell off her bike and took over her body like it was an epidemic, consuming every organ.

She had to get out of there.

She rummaged through her bag for her keys, landing on her phone, her mirror, her makeup. For the most part, everything Lexy owned was somewhere in her car. It wasn't easy to know what you would need on a three-month trip across the country. At last she found them and jammed them into the car.

Two breaths.

She could feel the steering wheel beneath her hands.

Two breaths.

She could hear the people from the porch laughing, unseen behind the row of rovers in front of her car.

Two breaths.

She could smell the leather of her car, the sun-burnt smell it had acquired from being years old.

Two breaths.

She could see the scent ornament hanging down from her mirror, a green pine tree.

Deep down, Lexy knew why she felt like this. It had come back so suddenly now that she could breathe again—the way it felt to first hear it in the auditorium, how much it hurt, afterwards, almost in hindsight, to hear Mr. Mack, the principal, stumbling over those two words. He couldn't seem to figure out the best phrase, so he said them all. Is dead. Has passed away. Has died. Lexy stared ahead at the little ornament hanging off the mirror and tried not to think of the blue curtains in the auditorium. Or the ugly carpet that covered the floor. That little ornament was meant to smell of pumpkin, but the scent had gone away somewhere in Illinois, and if she stared at it long enough, the auditorium went away and she was alone in her Toyota.

She took another deep breath, convinced she would never again think of Harry Styles, or One Direction, or the night again once she had the opportunity to yell at Samantha—her publicist. She reached forward and turned the key.

But of course, in the spirit of the night, it wouldn't start.

Lexy laid her head upon the steering wheel.

She'd at least have to stop crying before she called her dad, lest he buy a flight and come all the way to LA to lose his job. And what use was being in a healthy state of mind if she destroyed her family’s, too? 

A/N: lmk what you think/thoughts/feelings etc etc 

[sixth-light]

Fey & the Furious #2 and #3

Super-late to the party here, I know....

I’m still really enjoying this run - the worldbuilding and character work with the other driver and his kid is fun, there’s a Foxglove Summer callback! and the Beverley & Nightingale teamup (SHE CALLED HIM THOMAS) is watering my crops, etc, etc. The humour is very much to my taste (”I’m more of an economic migrant”, Peter publishing a book in 2030 called ‘things Peter Grant will write down if he survives’ - like, is it meant to be canon? I don’t care, it’s canon now.) 

My main issue is that the art is sometimes a little hard to follow (the big car chase scene is so dark) and that...honestly...it’s a little much story for a comic run. 

One of the biggest sins of the last few runs is that they’ve spent three issues building up a fairly complex story and then wrapping it up VERY quickly in the last issue, and there’s no way that isn’t going to happen here. Like - IS it ethical to farm unicorns just for their horns? Why does Bev need scuba gear in the ocean? Is there an actual crime to solve here? If there isn’t, how justified was what Peter and Sahra did to Craig and his daughter? When did Peter learn the FS Fae Queen’s name? How long have the Dutch magical crimes unit been talking to the Folly? And so on - and I have no faith any of these questions are going to be answered in one more issue. Which isn’t because the story is doing something wrong, necessarily...but it makes me wish it had been a novella, in a way that other comics runs I have particularly enjoyed (e.g. Night Witch) haven’t. 

For the moment I’ll just be over here crossing my fingers REALLY HARD that this one pulls off the final issue. 

[omgcuterus-blog]

Work Cited

Agarwal, Ashok, Aditi Mulgund, Alaa Hamada, and Michelle Renee Chyatte. 2015. “A Unique View on Male Infertility around the Globe.” Reproductive Biology and Endocrinology : RB&E. Retrieved November 13, 2019 (https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC4424520/).

Gibson, Donna M. and Jane E. Myers. 2002. “The Effect of Social Coping Resources and Growth-Fostering Relationships on Infertility Stress in Women.” Journal of Mental Health Counseling 24(1):13–68.

Green, David, Hazel Galvin, and Beverley Horne. 2003. “The Psycho-Social Impact of Infertility on Young Male Cancer Survivors: a Qualitative Investigation.” Psycho-Oncology 12(2):141–52.

Hollos, Marida and Ulla Larsen. 2008. “Motherhood in Sub-Saharan Africa: The Social Consequences of Infertility in an Urban Population in Northern Tanzania.” Culture, Health & Sexuality 10(2):159–73.

Maroufizadeh, Saman, Azadeh Ghaheri, and Reza Omani Samani. 2017. “Factors Associated with Poor Quality of Life among Iranian Infertile Women Undergoing IVF.” Psychology, Health & Medicine 22(2):145–51.

Smith, James F. et al. 2009. “Sexual, Marital, and Social Impact of a Man's Perceived Infertility Diagnosis.” Journal of Sexual Medicine 6(9):2505–15.

Tabong, Philip Teg-Nefaah and Philip Baba Adongo. 2013. “Understanding the Social Meaning of Infertility and Childbearing: A Qualitative Study of the Perception of Childbearing and Childlessness in Northern Ghana.” PLoS ONE 8(1):1–9.

[dhiatzs]

(They go to a music shop for a case and have to find a specific instrument)

Peter: Ok, guys, for those of you who don't know, this is a trumpet, this is a trombone, this is a tuba, and this is a french horn. We're looking for a tuba, here.

Beverley: You mean, like, trumpet, slidey trumpet, big-ass trumpet and drunk trumpet, and we're looking for big ass trumpet.

Peter: Beverley, no.

Nightingale: (points at a string instruments shelf) Well, at least the instruments you said look different one from another. These ones, however, I couldn't really tell...

Lesley: Wow those are some fancy guitars.

Peter: eXCUSE YOU that is a cello, a violin, a fiddle and a viola??

Beverley: String trumpets

Lesley: (points at a guitar) And what is that

Beverley: Acoustic trumpet

Peter: I'm gonna ripe your faces

Nightingale: Violins is never the solution, Peter

[annelapedusbrest-blog]

MY MEMORIES OF JOHANNESBURG - City of GOLD.

article published 4 Feb 2009. Written and compiled by Anne Lapedus Brest.

MEMORIES OF JOHANNESBURG,   CITY OF GOLD

Written and Compiled By

©  ANNE LAPEDUS BREST

On the 4th February 1961, when I was 14 years old,  and my brother Robert was 11, our family came to live in Johannesburg.  

 We had left Ireland, land of our birth, leaving behind our beloved Grandparents, family, friends, and a very special and  never-to-be-forgotten little furry friend,  to start a new life in South Africa, land of Sunshine and Golden opportunity…………… The Goldeneh Medina…...

We came out on the “Edinburgh Castle”, arriving  Cape Town 2nd Feb 1961.  We did a day tour of Chapmans Peak Drive,   Muizenberg,  went to somewhere called the “Red Sails”  and visited our Sakinofsky/Yodaiken family in Tamboerskloof.

 We arrived at Park Station (4th Feb 1961), Jhb,  hot and dishevelled after a nightmarish train ride, breaking down in De Aar and dying of heat.

 We lived in Becker Street, Yeoville, Robert went to K.E.S and I went to Barnato Park (aka Johannesburg Girls’ High) in Berea.  Robert was in Cadets , I played hockey, and bunked school (with Gilda Goldblatt!!)  Our next-door neighbours were Michael and Sandra Golding,  Zena and Teddy Cohen lived in Becker Street also and Ronnie and Nigel Baskin lived in Yeo Street near the Richters -  Selma and Charles Richter,.

 Girls at Barnato Park lived in mainly Hillbrow,  Berea, Yeoville, Bellevue,  Houghton, Orchards, Melrose and Dunkeld.  After school, many of us would catch the 19 bus from Tudhope Avenue  Berea to Raleigh Street, Yeoville, but many girls were collected by beautifully coiffed and bee-hived mothers with long painted nails, arriving to collect them in huge fancy Chevrolets, with  big cats’ eye tail-lights.

 ONLY IN SOUTH AFRICA ……………………………. 

Oy, but I had to get used to so many new expressions ……..

“ See you this arvy, Hey? “  and    “See you just now, Annie”    (I learnt the hard way that “Just Now” didn’t mean immediately)

 “There’s the new girl in Form 3, ……..  Shame!!”    “My sister’s baby is so cute, ……  Shame!  

 People would give me directions and tell me to turn at the robot.

 Can I  Lend  your book?

 Whatever I said, the girls would answer “Is it” ?

 The shul is full of KUGELS……………….

 Why did the bus-conductor call us all  “Donkey”  when he collected our tickets????   “Thank you,… Donkey” and the Klippies would say it in a high-pitched voice. “Thank you, donkeeeeeeeeyyyyyyyyyyyy”

 You MUST come visit this arvy,   see?     You MUST go and see Cliff Richard at the Collosseum.  You MUST buy the latest Elvis Presley record.     MUST,   MUST,   MUST   (only in South Africa!  Say that “MUST” to people overseas, they think you are a control-freak).  (took me a while to get used to it!!)    

G.C. EMMMMM 

Girls would talk about great talent at a party, and they talked about Chracks , boys talked about  “good stock” .

It’s a blerry gemors!!         Stoep.      Goeie Môre ,    Lekker Bly,      

My skat.     Klop Dissel Boom gaan!      Klappies.      Lappies.    

 Wag ‘n bietjie.      I’m Gatvol !!!!    Deurmekaar.

Yislaaik!     Herrrrrrre  ! (Yurrah)       Magtig!!  …..Maggggggtigggggg  !!!       Vragtig!  …….Vragggggtigggggg !!!!!!   

Where’s the jol tonight, hey?   Do youse know?

 Don’t tune  me  kak, hey?     Ag! Yes  no  fine.     Stovies.    He’s fab - such a doll !!!,      He thinks he’s such a big Bok.      It’s not so lekker.      

 Howzzit, my China.     I smaak you.  

 Don’t chaaf my cherry, hey!     Don’t grip my cherry…

 Who do  you  think you’re  looking at,  China?    

 Don’t  tune me grief, ek sê.       Voetsak!        Sies!       Ag! Siestog, Jong!  

 My bike is buggered.  

 Bugger off !

 He donnered  her.

 She Bliksemed him

 They Revolting!  

 Sommer so …………………..

 Don’t talk to them, they are all such Rubbishes.

 Stiffies.

 It’s Kwaai……..

Well, yes , no fine, Those were the days my friend we thought they’d never end …...   

SUBURBS    

In those days a majority of the Jewish community seemed to be living in Hillbrow,  Berea,   Bellevue,  Yeoville  , Cyrildene,  Observatory,  Dewetshof, Judith’s Paarl,  Highlands North, Houghton,  Dunkeld,  Melrose, Hyde Park.

 Suburbs where a lot of Jews also  lived were Kensington,   Emmarentia,  Greenside, Doornfontein,   Mayfair.  Remember Fordsburg (Fitas). Also a Jewish area once upon a time.  

 Robert and I went to Yeoville Chader (The Bernard Patley), - Mr. SHATCHAN was the  headmaster, and teachers I remember were Miss AARONS (Bella Golubchick) , Mr. Solly GOLDBERG, Rev.  HIMMELSTEIN, and the             Shammas was a  Mr. CHAZEN (His daughters, Gertie and Hannah both went to Barnato park) and  Mrs. MAGID 

Chader Children I can remember the names of some of the “ Chader children”. Colin Koransky,     Dorian Hersch (Shear),    Terroll Hersch (Z”l),   Gilda Goldblatt (Galvad), Brenda Goldblatt (Spitz) (O”h)    Frances Taylor, and her older sister, Sharon (now in Israel),    Carmella Shapiro,     Marsha Furman,     Gerald Pokroy,     Philip Eliason,  Harry Sacks,     Alan Kaye,   Susan Kaye,   Dorothy Lewis,    Harry Sacks,   Philip Sacks,    Ada Freedman,     Ilanah Himmelstein,    Julian (Julie) Kaplan,  Meyer Kaplan,    Brian (now in Oz) and his sister Jewel Rosenthal,     Eugene Klatzko,     Martin Chaitowitz,   Hymie  Symanowitz(Z”l),    Ruth Seeff,     Sandra Katzen (Pokroy)     Robert Hershfield,     Mervyn Gerszt,     Bernard Kromelick, Derek Hammerschlag (I think that was his name)  Wolfie Tepper,   Marlene Tepper,   Stanley Chitiz,   Manny Magid,    Melanie & Beverley Segal.

 I must have been a real “chrack” in those days, coming from Ireland, funny clothes, and even funnier out-of-control curly hair, and an accent nobody could understand.  I found it hard to make friends, but I eventually palled up with Gilda Goldblatt (now Galvad) , (daughter of Leslie (Z”l) and Mona Voloshen Goldblatt (O”h),  from Webb Street.   Leslie (Z”l)  was a Choirester in Wolmarans Street Shul) and Gilda and I have remained friends to this day.

 Girls at Barnato Park whom I remember offhand,    Pam Ginsberg (Melzter)   Pam Gladstone (Nathan),  Denise Seeff,     Ruth Seeff,    Susan Simon,     Molly Robinson,    Rhona Shroder (aka Rhondie Shrondie)  (Ullman) ,    Phyliss Goldblatt (Rubin),   Geraldine Blumberg,  Debbie Rabinowitz,  Jacqui Hotz,  Sharon Rafel (Rubin),    Leah Smith,   Ann Kaiser,  Ann Moscow, Barbara Diane Levy,   Barbara Levy,    Lynette and Jennifer Margolis,   Carol and Margaret Kowalsky ,  Gloria (Gola) Levine (Ash),  Gilda and Brenda Goldblatt,   Eugene Klatzko, ,   René Mazelle,  Jill Gonski, Felicity Nathanson,   Avril Kaye,  Jackie Susman (Woolf) (her sisters Helen and Andy went to Athlone) .   Pam Kohn,   Lydia Burstein,   Ada Folb,   Sharon Cooperman (Fehrer)  Beryl Andrews,   Heather Round (Levy),  Joan Gracie, Merriel Pratt, Hilda and Charlotte Brinkman, Ann Mullins, Susan Simon, Doreen Simon, Marilyn Silansky, Carole Silansky (Sands) Verite Hirshowitz, Ruth Samuel (Segal),    Vivien Alexander,    Renée Kunz,   Lorraine Goldberg,    Marilyn Silansky and her sister Carol Silansky, ,   Yvonne  Shochet,  Janet King,  Pam Kewley,   Adah  Ben Yehuda,   Roslyn Abramovitz,  Joan Cooper,  Bernice Frid (Vunck),  Suzanne Lutrin (Resnick) (O”h),    Helen Rothschild,   Joyce Tischauer,   Helen Leftin,    Maureen Nagel (Ruskin),   Gabriella Albrecht,  Sharon Smith (Munitz),   Pam Levy,  Deborah-Ann Fanaroff,   Jacky Centner (Cannon),  Lydia Burstein, Ronelle Shepherd,  Cynthia Muller,  Marsha Sosnovick, (Jansen)    Karen Israelsohn,  Joan David (Elkon),   Sheina & BatSheva Romm,   Lorraine Nussbaum (Silver),   Susan Hommell,     Kela Saltzer , Barbara Beira,   Shoshanna Kaplan (Kaplan)  , Myrna Katz,  Isobel Strasbourg (Mehl) , Isobel Thomson, Vivienne Lee,  Meryl Michaelmore,  Vivienne Fritz, (Head Girl)     Patsy Coetzee, (Vice Head Girl)  Philla Moller, Gillian Coleman, Sheena Haarhof,  Glen Marshall, Naomi Tabachowich,   Ailsa Bowley, Sheena Hayworth, And  some girls from Mrs. Oppenheimers extra Afrikaans lessons class were, Vasiliky someone from Greece, Daria someone from Italy,  Jean Smith (?)  from Rhodesia, Jacqueline someone from England, Marilyn Patricia Myers from England,  and teachers, Miss Todd, Roberta Evans, Miss Cohen (later Mrs. Gevisser), Miss Miles with DOG - George, Miss Langley (head), Miss Rosewarne, Miss Walmsely ,  Miss Hodkin,  Miss Jones (Vice Head), Miss Horn, Miss Dankwerths, Miss Martin, (later Mrs. Gold), Mrs Morrison, and one or two Barnato Park Dogs, who came along to school with teachers.  I think Miss Evans had a little Muttie trouping along next to her?  

SCHOOLS     Athlone Girls , Athlone Boys,    Waverly girls,  Highland’s North,  Parktown Girls and Parktown Boys,    Northview, Greenside High,    King David Linksfield  (King David Victory Park was to follow later on)  Yeshiva College,     Rodean,     Brescia House,     St. Vincents  (for the hard of hearing).    Helpmekaar,     Damelin College,    Yale College (Marcus (Marky) Luntz) , Regis College,  Princeton College.      Yeoville Boys,   Observatory Girls, ,    Hyde Park,    The Tech.      K.E.S (King Edward School),    St. Johns,     Redhill,       St. Stithians,    Marist brothers,    Yeoville Convent,    Hirsch Lyons,    Yiddish folk,  Jeppe Boys, Jeppe Girls.   H.A  Jack,   Jewish Government.

 SCHOOL UNIFORMS. Mc Cullogh @ Bothwell.

Remember Yeoville?   The Yeoville Post Office in Raleigh Street, C.N.A, the Picadilly Bioscope  the Bug House (Oi) next door to  Yeoville Home Industries (owned by Simon and Leah Kaufman),   Kenmere Pharmacy (owned by the Marams) (next to the fruit shop in Kenmere Rd) and  Yeoville Pharmacy (owned by the Joffes) (diagonally opposite the Yeoville Baths in Raleigh St.,)  Yeoville Fruit and Flowers (Jorge aka George),   Hill Fisheries,   Crystals,   Yeoville Baths, (and a swimming coach there called Bernard  Green) and the Apollo Café across the road where they played pinball and the ducktails always hung around there with their chains, and motor bikes, all the Brekers.   Theo  Hommel (fabrics),   Fitz Bakery where the OK Bazaars in Yeoville built their new shop, corner Raleigh and Bedford, diagonally opposite the Yeoville Library.  And opposite where the 19 bus went into Berea and town), Hub Stores,    Emdins – Haberdashery – (one or two shops down from the Apollo Café,)  Denbo Jewish Bookstore,  Scotch Corner!    Billy’s Hairdresser in Rockey Street (near Raymond St)    Faigels   and the  Dae-nite Pharmacy Rockey Street, cor. Bezuidenhout,   Squires (clothing, school uniforms/shoes)

 Portuguese Fish and Chip shop in Rockey Street, all the Tailor shops going down into Rockey Street, and Jekisons Tailors, and a  guy called Bokkie Jekison who was the Tailor there  (great looking bloke, with a great looking brother, I think his name was Eugene)  both so easy on the eye!). Bokkie recently told someone that on the 7th April he will have been at the shop for 55 years  California Tailors, and the Yeoville Recreation Center in Raleigh St, where Sandra Stein won the “Miss Yeoville” competition in about 1962 .(Bokkie Jekison died before the 7th April, suddenly, whilst out on a walk)

Water Polo at the Yeoville Baths. Richard LEE was a water-polo player, he lived in Yeo Street, Yeoville, I think.  Had a brother Eric LEE.  They were Highlands North school boys.  Lionel GILINSKY, another water-polo player.

 And does anyone remember the Purdy Boys, Neville and Leonard?

Some MORE of the YEOVILLE, CYRILDENE, OBSERVATORY people …… Jeff Wittles ,    Linda Shapiro,     Rex Schwartz,    Sharon  Schwartz ,     Ivan Sabbath,       Arnold Messias,     Ivan Sandler,     Louise Lazersohn ,     Barry Sacks,      Barry Bloch,     Barry Black,    Michael Walldorf (Vorsie),  Sonia Barsol,     Gerald (Jake) Fox (Z”l)  Jonny Grossmark,    Vivian Stillerman,    Charmian Clayton,   Max Gur,   Ruth Margolis,   Elaine Margolis,   Heather Garrun,   Yvette, Esther & Naomi Sofer.    Sharna & Nadja Isaacs (aka Lerman),   Colin Opwald,     Frances Siegenberg,  Nicky & Costa Kapitanopoulos,  Alfie Wood and his sister Margie Wood (now Horn),   Locky Lockstone,  Shirley Shtub  (probably Sztab),  Reuel Kaplan,  Geoff (Geoffrey)  Landsman (Z”l) ,  Reina Cohen (O’h),   Sandra Stein (Ezra) ,  Nola Stein (Fox),  Charmion Clayton,   Ivor Cohen,   Sandra Deitz ,   Spencer Hodgson,     Heather Garrun,    Linda Chitiz or Chitters ,  Marlene Teper,   Leonard Kahn  & his sister Maureen Kahn. (now Puterman)  Maureen and her husband were one of the first people to move into a new block of flats called “La Contessa”,  in Yeo & Bedford St. Yeoville)   Arnie  Jones,   Jennifer Jones,   Bernard James,    Abel de Freitas,   Sandra Tucker.  The Griffith Girls (Virg, Bernice (Bunny) and  Diane –still great friends of mine) and their brother Cedric) The Matthews Girls Hazel, and Norma, there were more sisters but I can’t remember the names) .   

GREENSIDE/EMMARENTIA   People, -   Clifford Price,    Howard Price,    Brian Ruskin, and I think Barry Pillemar ,  Suzie  & Gaby Henshel, (de Groen),  June and Yalta Gervis,   Suzanne & Linda Myers,  Aubrey Gamsu    Ada Gamsu,   Maurice Hockman, Margo and Peter Philips,

HOUGHTON people. Michael, Brian & Jennifer Lever,    Molly Robinson,  Harry & Philip Sacks,    Sharon Smith (Munitz)  

HIGHLANDS NORTH  People. -   Brian, Stanley & Karen Feinstein (Joseph),   Max Schiff (O”h)

WHO REMEMBERS   -  Hymie Brest,  (Mayfair/ Kensington)  and his friend (to this day) Alec Ross   (Bez Valley).  Certainly part of the  “Main Manne” crowd.  

 ONLY IN SOUTH AFRICA …………………………………

Where’re you okes jolling to?       Jollers.     Lekker Jol.

 Where are your folks tonight.

 Volkspeeler.     The Sakkie sakkie

 I’m only chaafing, man?     Sweet Obeet.!!     Lekker soos ‘n krekker (cracker)

 Wat ‘s goedkoop is duur koop.       Stille water – Diepe grond,

 Eina!     Skyfies.   Veldskoene.    Breekers.

 Don’t tune me Chandies

 Check that little lightie, he’s  two bricks and a tickey high

 Ever since Pa fell off the bus.

 Give me a bell, hey?       Bell me.    Love you stax.     I’ll  fetch you just now

 African women sitting on the street corners calling out   HEY Mielieeeeee -  Tickey Mielieeeeeeeee.    

 Vrystaat!  

 Vat hom Fluffy.

 I’ve got Sut.

 They’re so larnie!

 My ou’ man is giving me uphill

 My Skattebol.

 I feel up to Paw-Paw.  I feel up to Maggots.

 ‘Strue’s Bob…??       No….. You LIE !!!

 SHOT !!!!!!!!   (SHOTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTT)

 Skit ‘n donner (donder) (the movies)

  And Observatory café where boys played pinball and they had ‘Pennyline Sweets’ where you could buy 2 for a penny  and cafés had Jukeboxes . Remember the old 78 records (those were in the fifties though) and then the LPs - wow, and when those came out we thought we’d died and gone to Heaven, and the 45 speed records.   Cassettes, and tape recorders,   reel-to-reel tape-recorders (I still have one).

Boys had a way of walking, hands in pockets, only the thumbs visable and rolled from side to side with a sort of rolling gait, and the more they rolled as they walked, the more macho they felt!  

Who remembers ????……     Debras  (Schmaltz), and  when a tub of Yoghurt cost 8c, and an Appleltizer cost the same, a bar of Cadburys chocolate cost 5c and there was a chocolate bar called “Honeycrisp” also for 5c, and you could get a Toasted Cheese  for 15c.    Stamps cost 2½ cents .  If you left the envelope open, it was cheaper…     Airletter forms in green,   airmail writing paper, airmail envelopes and Basildon Bond writing paper.

STREETS in Yeoville/ Bellevue,    -   Raleigh St,   Rockey St,   Bezuidenhout St.,  Isipingo St., Raymond St , Hopkins St,  Yeo St,    Kenmere Rd,  Fortèsque Rd,    Becker St,   Cavendish Rd,    Bedford Rd,   Webb St,   Natal St, Isipingo,   St. Georges Rd,   Ellis St.,

 YEOVILLE BOXING CLUB  - Sammy Samson  and his son Cedric who sang as a child, and he had a group at some stage called “the FireFlies”   I think Alan Goldstein who was also a child singer may well have been part of that band ( later known as Alan Gold) .

How many people remember……. The Black Steer in Yeoville   - fab apple crumble and double thick cream and  in the 1960s the price of a Steerburger, with Pickled Cucumber, fried onions and salad was 45c ……….but at the Golden Spur,  the Burger would cost you 50c and the Yeoville crowd felt that was too expensive!)  Norman’s Grill (for Prawns!) in the Jeppe Hotel.    East Africa Pavilion (well known for it’s curries, where the waiters wore a red “fez”,  The 252 Tavern.   His  Majesty’s Cellars,   69 Grill.

 and Kosher -  Connoisseur Hotel,(Gloria Rootshtain) (long gone)

 And remember-   The Rosenkowitz 6   from Cape Town, first surviving Sextuplets in the World

 And when Arcadia (Jewish Orphanage and Home for Jewish children) was in Forestown

 DAENITE Pharmacy, Orange Grove.  Owned by  Chookie BRENNER .  and the okes that worked there, Mervin  Rappoport, Issy Peimer, Cecil Chweidan (O”h), Ivan Dorff, Solly Branstein, and a girl called Lola but I can’t remember her surname.   And     Dr. Chris Barnard, (Heart Transplants Groote Schuur Hospital, Cape Town)

 And the …… the motor racing at   Kyalami Race Track

 And the Motor Rallys?. Anyone remember  Lionel Gilinsky?    He raced something called “Production cars” in “Endurance Races” at Old Grand Central Circuit ( Halfway House, now called Midrand) in the late 60’s and 70’s  -   and later “Historic” Cars at Kyalami Race Track.  He was known to be amongst  South Africa’s Top 3 Racing and Motor rally drivers in the 60’s, 70’s and 80’s.   Not bad for a boy from Welkom!!

Attorneys. -   Moss Morris & Ettlinger, (Lennie Ettlinger,   Max Levenberg,   Selwyn Cohen,   Hilliard Gordon,  articled clerks then - Rodney Berman and John Gilbert,  Also a Selwyn someone articled clerk).     Routlege Douglas   Wilson   Auret  & Wimble,      Wides , Chain & Berman  (Cyril Wides, Inky (Ian) Chain and Rodney Berman),     Edward Nathan.      Israel, During & Kossuth

Tour Operators - Springbok (Atlas) Safaris,  (Julie Lapedus).

Accountants.   Sussman and Lange (Trevor Sussman and David Lange)  (cousin of Myron Lange, the Surgeon) later known as Sussman Goddard.

HILLBROW.  We always went to The  Curzon and  Clarendon for 7/6- , ( later 75c,)  and then a Bioscope called the International (owned by Herman and Maxwell Youngelson) was opened at the top of Pretoria Street and there it would cost you between 90c and R1.00, but the seats were so comfy and the whole bioscope was so plush, that the Yeovillites felt it was well worth the extra.  

Anyone remember The  French Hairdressing Saloon    (a Mrs. Sher was the manageress) and the  OK  Bazaars and Carnival Novelty.

ONLY IN SOUTH AFRICA  ………………………….

I’m going for a goof this arvy.       ‘Scopes,   Flicks, Flik,     What’s the “Aggie”?     

Hy het  haar uitgeskop, verstaan jy my?

Check my new jammy!

 We going to Durbs with the car,  probably see lots of ‘Vaalies there, all the ou toppies,   tannies  and   ooms,  nie waar nie?

My ol’ lady!       My ol’ man.    

My broer !    My sussie.    My Ouma,    My Oupa

 Knobkerrie.   Sjambok

 It’s so hot, I’m vrekking off   here.

 D’is Baie Mooi

 He lives in the Gramadoelas….

 She lives in the Bundu…

 The Dingas

 I was with Ruth, Heather and them

 Drink your SUP !!     there’s a plate on the Zinc

 Let’s make a plan…..

 Cows give us MULK!

 My one aunt    My one leg,    My one arm,    My one finger   My one toe

 Broekies

 The word “THE.  ” I learned in school that before a consonant we say “THE” .   “THE” bed,  “THE” table,  “THE” book. And before a vowel the have to prounce the “the” as “THEE”…………….  “THEE”  Apple,   “THEE” elephant,  “THEE” egg.

 So why then, do we hear (only in South Africa) people saying   “THUH” apple,  “THUH” Elephant,  “THUH” egg.  Please hold for “THUH” Operator.   And why do some of us say  “the PHOTA” when it is clearly “PHOTO”.

FOLKSINGING Era .   Who remembers the  Nite beat, run by Abe (who ran the tuck shop at the Yeoville Swimming Pool), and the folk-singers Ian & Ritchie ( Ian Lawrence and Ritchie Morris),    Des and Dawn (Lindberg)(“And the Seagull’s name was Nelson”) (Dawn wore her hair in two pigtails then) Colin Shamley,   Dave Marks (“Mountains of Men”  and “Master Jack”) Cornelia, And  The Troubador,  The College Set - Andy Levy,  Hugh Solomon,  Norman Cohen)     Keith Blundell and the Baladeers,     Aubrey and Beryl Ellis.     Mervyn and Jocelyn Miller (from Potch).   Mel, Mel and Julian (Mel Miller, Mel Green, and Julian Laxton.

BIKERS and the Hell’s Angels, wearing black leather jackets, chains and the peace sign often around their necks,  roaring down Pretoria St and Kotze St on Harley Davidsons making a helluva racket, some of the more nervous  Biker girls precariously hanging  onto their boyfriend’s backs,  but “the in girls” didn’t hold on, they somehow balanced themselves by placing their hands nonchelantly behind the seat, looking around, throwing their hair back, with a  “don’t- sig–with- me” look, lazer- beam- eyes, -looking–out- through- thick- black- fringes, and a tattoo here and there.  

And nobody did “sig” with them, either.  

 The FLYING SAUCER is where they all met.   Pretoria Street, Hillbrow.

Hillbrow’s Eateries and Coffee Bars   Doney’s coffee bar for the best cappuccino in town (who remembers  Jeftah and George, the Duke)    Café Wien (later on), with the most comfortable seats,   it was like sitting in your own lounge,  Café Krantzler,    Dunk-a-donut, The  Milky Lane,  the Florian (where the bus turned to go down Twist street to Town).    Mi Vami,   Lucky  Luke  (Steak House in the 70s),  Fontana, open 24 hours a day, (famous for their chickens roasted on a spit,)  Pikin-a-chicken,   Porter House (Frulatto and the best Pink Sauce in town) not to mention the steaks (not that I ate them being one of the Kosher Kids, but I was sorely tempted, HA HA HA) and the German Beer Keller,  The Hamburger Hut,  Golden Egg,   Bella Napoli. Kiss-Kiss.

 The CHEZA in Jeppe Street.  Famous for Muesli.

 HAIR STYLES and fashion.  We dyed our hair black with Palette where you dropped a white tablet into some black gunky muck and we all had pitch black hair. The Blacker your hair, the more “sharp” you were.   We teased it and wore it in Wings, and the bigger the Wings were, the more “with it” you were.   And remember the stiff petticoats under your many Flared skirts,   and cat-eye glasses?  Helanca stove-pipes,  in all colours.  Studded Belts, Box Pleated skirts,  and ID Bracelets (with your boyfriend’s name engraved on the inside), Plaid pinafores came later on, and a ridiculous little narrow velvet bow on a clip or hairgrip which we found a space for in the teased bird’s nest, usually just to the back of the fringe. And also a thin chiffon scarf tied around the hair.  White high-heeled shoes  (I wouldn’t be seen dead in half the things we wore then)

My Mom always said that my hair was like a Bird’s Nest at the back, but then I didn’t have eyes at the back of my head,  (just as well).  Boys wore their hair sleeked back with Brylcream and Vitalis and all bought their t-shirts from the Skipper Bar. (Arnie, Mervyn, Earle and Barry Sacks) Black t-shirts with  thin white and red stripes around the neck.   And a corresponding white tee-shirt, with black and red stripes.  If you didn’t have one of those, you were not one of the “in” boys!!!!  

 And then girls started to iron their hair.   I remember my Mother used to plonk my head onto the ironing board, and put a brown paper bag on top of it, and iron away until I had sleek straight hair, but then the minute it rained, I looked at though someone has plugged me into an electric socket….  Durbs did the same to all those who had out-of-control hair -    Frizzed them out in 2 mns flat,  in fact as soon as you got to Van Reenen’s Pass into Natal, you knew you were there because your hair suddenly was on its own mission……..

and who Whirled their hair?????  Oy -  a bittereh gelechter….. We whirled it One way, then the other way, and you had dead straight hair (until you hit the 505 Club and the first thing you’d notice is that your fringe was just “not there” anymore) and the rest of your poor hair style was all moving in different directions.  If it was raining, and you opened your front door, bang went the straight hair.

Remember those little DOEKs we wore on our head when we went to Durbs.  I have a photo of myself wearing one.

COME ON GIRLS  - who used to sleep with curlers/rollers in their hair!! and who remembers using the inside of a TOILET ROLL as an emergency roller???????  And all this lot would be covered over by a hairnet.   Of course morning brought a splitter- of- a- headache from the curlers digging into your head.  Anyone remember?  Bet you do!!!  I DO!! There you are, the big ADMIT……….   What on EARTH did we look like?  I don’t even want to think about it …………………

I always say that if I have to come back in another life, I want to come back as ME but with dead straight hair. Second choice, I wouldn’t mind coming back as one of my spoilt-out-of-control  Dachshunds either (but the  straight haired type, not the wiry haired) (ha ha)

 GYM:    Bodybuilders, weight-lifters and wannabes came strutting out of Gyms such as  Sam Busa  and   Monte Osher  all fit and glistening, with huge shoulder muscles, and killer smiles  - carrying black gym bags.  And  Reg Park’s Gym,  ALSO somewhere in Hillbrow.

YOGA:    Mannie and Alan FINGER,   Nina OBEL

MODEL AGENCIES: .  Stella Grove and Gianna Pizanello

DANCING STUDIOS and DANCERS:    Natalie Stern      the late Mercedes Molina,    Jeffrey Neiman  (Enrique Segovia) & Rhoda Rifkin,    Bernice Hotz , Gitanella   (Spanish, Ballet,) Shirley Klitzner (O”h)  (later in the 70s Hilary Etkind - taught with Rhoda and Jeffrey)    (anyone who ever loved Spanish dancing, will remember Mercedes Molina/ Jeffrey Neiman as a brilliant dance duo)  (and will remember the very sad passing away of Shirley Klitzner (O”h) when she was barely into her twenties).

 PHOTOGRAPHERS.   Maurice,   Kurt Slesinger,    Karklin,  when it was fashionable to stand your wedding photo on an small easel on the floor.  Either carpet or parquet flooring.  Stella Nova .

RUGBY. Alan MENTER   Springbok Flyhalf, and   Sid NOMIS Springbok - Center, and later Wing),   Alan is married to Pam (ex Pretoria) and his Brothers are  Brian, Robert (Robbie) and Mandy (Malcolm (Z”l)) Menter. Their Mom Esmé (O”h)  grew up with mine, in Dublin.  Syd is married to Ann.

 CRICKET.    Dr. Ali BACHER  former South African cricket captain and one of the greastet cricketers in South Africa. Ali BACHER received South Africa’s Sports Merit Award, the country’s HIGHEST athletics honour. Ali is married to Shira (I am friendly with Shira’s sister Marsha KARKLIN,) and I remember their daughter Ann being a Tennis champion when she was just a little kid of 11 in the days of the “Jewish Guild”  Other well known South African Jewish cricketers came later on, Mandy YACHAD , and later Adam BACHER, nephew of Dr. Ali Bacher

TYPEWRITERS.    My first memory of a type writer was that old black thing with with a keyboard with round circular lettering and a typewriter ribbon.   My Mom used one in Dublin,  Then I remember the Olivetti and also a swiss typewriter,  but the ones where you would have to bash a silver thing on the upper  right to go to a new line.  I remember electric typewriters, and using a white powdery Tippex  thing for covering up mistakes, except that they never quite covered them up, particularly on the carbon copies. And remember the carbon copies.. HA HA,  and when I worked for lawyers, they didn’t allow those tippex rub-outs, so one little mistake and you had to start all over again. Remember STENCILS and Roneo-ing various blurb.   I can remember using a bright shocking pink liquid with the stencils, I think.  We wrote to “Messers. So and so”, and we’d end off with “ I remain, Yours Faithfully”

 WEDDINGS  and when the Bride/Kallah would change into her “going away outfit” and the blissful couple would leave the wedding to go off on their honeymoon.  When Bride’s kept their vails on the entire night. When there were only 4 pole-holders and the Bride’s  parents paid for the entire wedding, and the Groom/Chossen’s parents would pay for the booze, the photographer and the flowers.

 THE CIRCUS   Boswell-Wilkie. I hated the circus, terrified of the animals and sorry for them at the same time, a hypnotized crocodile once got out- of- control and strarted climbing out of the ring into the screaming audience. Clowns clowning around were never my scene, and when the trapeze artists or the tight-rope walkers did their act, my heart was always in my mouth, terrified they would fall or something.  One did once, I can never get that memory out of my mind.  

ONLY IN SOUTH AFRICA ……………………………………

 I dopped my exams and my folks are having a cadenza -  *Snot ’n trana  all round ….. (*Yiddish Equivalent is Vainin ‘n Kloggin, well, that is the Yiddish we used in Ireland).  

Chips, here comes the Teacher.

I’ll have a dop of brandy.

Ops me a pencil.  

Baie Dankie…….. hoor!    Aseblieftog!

Plaasjapie.

Safe my mate !!!!   (and the hand movement – very important) -   forefinger/little finger pointed up while thumb was holding middle/ ring finger down) - done with a wag-type-movement, like fast- mode windscreen wipers.

We’re Chommies  

Cheers!  

There’s a Miggie in my room.  

Kyk  daai (Daardie) Goggoh (as in insect, not as in “GOGO” -  Zulu for Granny)

Boeremeisie.     Mevrou,     Mejuffrou/Juffrou,     Meneer

Kyk na daardie lelike ding………………

 Kombi

 Gooi

 Waneer u die syn hoor, is dit agtien uur, twee en vyftig minute en dertig sekondes…………..

 Around 1964 came the Beatles, (“8 days a week”, “Love Love me do” and later, “Sgt Pepper’s Lonely Heart’s club Band” “Hey Jude”)  The Rolling Stones, (Angie)  the Mini Skirt era and  Mary Quant and the birth of the Discothèque .    Op Art earings in gaudy colours and the skirts continued to get shorter.  Girls wore double breasted Pin stripe suits which made a come back.  The Boutiques were born.  I remember the  BENATER family had a great boutique “Carnabies”, at the top of Rissik Street, or near there.  It was, I think, the first shop of it’s kind.  Very modern, trendy and for the young (20s and 30s).  And the Pink Panther was in Hillbrow - Also very trendy gear.

 Remember Twiggy?……….  She was on every Magazine cover, often holding her Teddy Bear, feet pidgeon-toed, with beautiful big brown eyes, and a body so thin, she could fit through a crack in the wall.   She started a trend, her, and “the Shrimp” -  (Jean Shrimpton),  and Mary Quant.

 AND   Op Art Earings     in strange shapes and gaudy colours, shorter skirts, and flattie shoes.  

 The First Disco was at the Summit Club, Marrakech,  (around 1966) with Go-Go dancers Dixie,  Felicity Fouché, and  Christine all dancing away in the micro-est of Mini-Skirts.   Johnny Martin (previously known as Martin Raff) was the owner, and I heard he also owned a club called 007.

Someone called Neville Peacock was the Marrakech DJ and there were psychdelic and ultra violet lights and if you stood under the latter, all your “klein-goed” shone like a beacon for all to see.  

And   the 505 also in Hillbrow.  Eddie Eckstein and Paul Ditchfield - The Bats played there on a Sunday ),  and the Diamonds  and  Gene Rockwell (Heart!”) as did the Basemen (Ronnie Cline on Keyboard, Ralph Simon – Singer, Rodney Caines – Bass Guitar, Leon Bilewitz – drummer and Irwin Kalis – Lead Guitar) and Clive Calder,  (Les Markowitz on drums) also played at “Club-a-go-go” and also they toured around the countryside and played at various venues.

Also Johnny Congos (“Sealed with a Kiss”),  Johnny and the G-Men,  and Johnny Sharp,   4 Jacks and a Jill.   The Staccatos.  Did I mention Manfred Mann? (“pretty Flamingo”)

 MORE CLUBS   - TJ’s  (town) and The Yellow Submarine (Hillbrow) (owned by Martin HART) and the Boat (Buccleuch) were in the latter part of the sixties  and the Downstairs later called The Purple Marmalade somewhere in Hillbrow.  Another Disco was owned by George McCauley, brother of  Ray, opposite Joubert Park (Club-A-Go-Go),  His Granny worked in the tuckshop and was always so nice to everyone.  The Band there was the “Falling Leaves” and George was in the Band.   The Electric Circus,  And  Raffles , a very fancy disco/restaurant but that was in the late 70s. Owned by Dave Kerney. (I think).  The Stable in Jan Smuts Avenue. The Out of Town Club

 And who remembers the other Bioscopes -  The   Colosseum with the twinkling lights,  Cliff Richard sang there once, and a few girls from Barnato Park were expelled for bunking school and going to his concerts.    His Majestys,   Monte Carlo (French Movies),  The  Empire,   20th Cen. Fox - Pritchard Street,  Cinerama (Claim and Noord)  In those days there was an interval after the News and the Cartoons, and Usherettes would be standing at each exit with a tray with all the Munchies and Chocolates, cold-drinks, etc. The  Apollo  in Doornfontein.  I’ve already mentioned the Yeoville Bioscopes earlier on. Who remembers the “Midnight Shows”   the Astra and the Victory in Orange Grove, The Rex in Greenside. The Plaza, the Bijou in town and some flea-bitten run down Café Bio which no decent self-respecting girl would touch with a barge-pole, but I can’t remember it.  A lot of the Yale College boys went there. But not the girls!!!!

People smoked in the bioscopes (“scopes”) then and when you looked up, you saw it all swirling around in smoke from the projector.  Nice and healthy!!   but nobody ever noticed it.  It was just a part of life in the sixties.

REMEMBER WHEN ……….  we went to Bioscope on a Saturday night, dressed up in your A-line dress, or a Box- Pleated skirt, or tiny hound’s-tooth straight skirt in black/white and your black patent high-heeled shoes, with a Black Patent leather bag to match, and your gloves (which you carried in your hand).  And later you wore your Dress with the shorter hemline, Mini-Skirts, and  your “A-line evening coat” (Jackie Kennedy), just on the knee,  and your flattie shoes, the hair teased up to the high heavens and lacquered so heavily that if it rained, you looked like glue. (Boys hated teased and lacquered hair)

And the boys wore jarmins and Elvis Presley hair-styles with thin ties made of nylon or similar in a machine-crochet style.    (Later when the Beatles came in, boys’ hairstyles changed forever, and no boy would be seen dead with Brylcream or Vitalis plastered on his head).  Boys would never  previously been seen in pastel colours, but the Beatles changed all those dark shirts for pink, mauve and lemon, with a pin collar near the tie. 

Boys would buy you a 75c box of Black Magic chocolate at Interval.  If you put it into your black patent leather handbag and never offered him one, then your name was mud, and girls judged boys by whether they opened the car door for you …. or not!

 AND SOME OF THE MOVIE STARS ….,   Natalie Wood,    Kathryn Hepburn,  Rock Hudson,   Doris Day,   Steve McQueen,   Sohia Loren,    Alain Delon (the heart-throb of the 60’s) (who remembers him in “Purple noon”) Gina Lollobridgida,   Raquel Welsh,    Bridgitte Bardot,   Ursula Andress,   Warren Beatty,  Jack Nicholson (One Flew over the Cuckoo’s Nest),   Shirley McLaine,     Julie Christie,    Michael Caine,  Elizabeth Taylor,   Richard Burton,    Paul Newman,    Sal Mineo,    Suzanne Pleshette,   Richard Burton,    Sean Connery,    Omar Sharif,    Charlton Heston,   Gregory Peck (to die for?) James Dean

 POPULAR MOVIES.   West side story,   King Kong,  Gone with the Wind,   Exodus,   Dr. No,   *From Russia with Love,   * (Remember in that movie, the Russian woman (was her name someone KREBBS?) who had a knife come out of her boot and it shot straight into poor Sean Connery’s shin bone. EINA!     Just thinking about it, hurts me)   Bridge on the River Kwai,    Dr. Zhivago,    Goldfinger,   (it had a great theme song in it  by I think Shirley Bassey) Seven Brides for Seven Brothers,   Annie Get your Gun,    Dingaka.

 And the DRIVE INs     Old Pta Road -   Jhb Drive in,   The 5-Star (Eloff St.Ext),  The Velskoen  (If a girl was seen at the drive in with a boy, she got a “bad name” and the same for the Café Bio’s.  It was just not for a nice Jewish girl!!

 REMEMBER WHEN ….. there was NO Bioscope on Sunday nights

 THEATRES.  Alhambra (Doornfontein) ,   Brian Brooke (Braamfontein),     Market Theatre ( Newtown),     Alexander theater ,    Jacques Brel,     Apollo (Doornfontein).

 Remember the Adverts for all the Cigarettes,  Players,  Craven "A", Dunhill (remember the maroon Rolls Royce?)  Benson & Hedges (Gold) ,   Lexington (That’s the one!),   Gunston (remember him on a raft, all macho,manly, unshaven and rough and ready tumbling through impossible rivers?)   Horseshoe Tobacco,     Gold Dollar,    Texan, (which the boys would hold between their thumb and middle finger)   Lucky Strike,   Gauloise and Peter Stuyvesant (for the fun lovers, remember the wonderful places they went to and the great clothes they wore, swimming in glorious lagoons, skiing down snow-capped mountains, all the beautiful people,all  having wonderful fun?)  I never smoked,(well, I have to say that, in case my family read this article, ha ha) but after I watched the Peter Stuyvesant adverts, I really felt like buying a packet , so that I too, could go to all those magical places, and I’d look glamerous too,  HA HA   - (the power of advertising!) (A Bittereh Gelechter!!)

But it just looked so “in” to see people smoking, and girls would hold the cigarettes at the tips of their fingers, and waved their hands for effect as they spoke, shaking their fringes out of their eyes.   People who didn’t smoke, were “squares”.  

I remember Celeste GREENBLATT, taught me how to apply black pencil inside my eyelids, and ‘base” onto my face and to wear white lipstick and I taught Sandra STEIN (later Ezra) to dye her hair black, and the blacker the better, (her  Mother had a FIT)  - Golda (née Kaufman)  (O”h) whom I saw yearly in LA and she never failed to remind me ! 

FLORA and FAUNA in South Africa.  I remember once being enthralled by the most magnificent yellow creeper we had growing on the fence in Becker Street.  I took photos of it, and sent it to my friends in Dublin to show the exotic flora and fauna is this beautiful sunny South Africa, until Michael GOLDING next door, laughed his head off and said “but that’s only Canary Creeper, it’s not much better than a common garden weed”!!     African Violets,  Jasmin, Golden Shower,   Begonia Sherera,   Bougainvillea,    Pointsettia,   Birds of Paradise,  Cycads?. Maybe they do grow overseas too.

 PARTIES   in   Observatory,   Cyrildene and   Dewetshof.  We rock ‘n rolled to Elvis Presley’s   “Jail house rock” & “Don’t step on my blue suede shoes”, “Rock around the Clock”   in our flared skirts with stiff petticoats underneath, the more the better, and huge belts around our waists, and we wore flat shoes (75c at Maram’s chemist, and 95c for the leopard skin ones).   And later we twisted with Chubby Checker (Let’s Twist again, like we did last summer )   We also did a dance called the Shake – anyone remember the song “I’ll do the Shake, the hippy- hippy shake” and also a dance called the Madison.

 The Bez Valley Ou’s, on a Sat night Jol, and the Lebs  would sometimes gatecrash. Usually a Scuffle and the girl’s father would have to ask them to leave.  Sometimes, in stubborn cases the police would have to be called in to skop them all out.  And then the party continued on,    Little Richard,   Cliff Richard,   -   sometimes a few of the kids would have a bit of “dagga”, (a zol), on the stoep or in the back garden when they thought nobody was looking, and the only way anyone kopped on was because they would come back to the party with a manic laugh, and red eyes. (and of course the smell, but if you admitted to knowing the smell, then it meant you were a dagga smoker yourself!)    Trini Lopez. “If I had a hammer”

 SOCIALS at   Oxford Shul,  The Vrede Hall,    Yeoville Recreation Center,    Temple Shalom,   and Bands like “Dinkie and the Deans” - Jake (Gerald) Fox  (Z”l) (rhythm Guitar),  Barry Sacks (Lead Guitar),  Spencer Hodgson (Bass guitar)  and Errol Sack on the drums, would play, they also played at the Club 505 in “the Brow”.   Peter Lotus well known Jhb Disc Jockey,  I think he sang as well.  Lots of singers used to go to Margo’s on a Sunday Afternoon, and the crowd would all hot-foot it out there after them to hear music. I think it was Bapsfontein, or near there).    There was little else to do on a Sunday, so many places were closed.  Just remembered another band, Dave Levine and the Swinging Angels.   Les Gutfreund was one of the band and  made a name for himself as Les Goode. “Dickie Loader and the Blue Jeans”  Gene Rockwell – Heart.

NIGHT CLUBS and Bands.  Bennie Michaels,    Archie Silansky and his daughter Carole Sands     The Coconut Grove  at the Orange Grove Hotel,    Dan Hill (Ichilchik),     The Colony at the Hyde Park Hotel,    Sardi’s,    The  Mediteranean (I Cinque di Roma),  Diamond Horseshoe,   The Greek Taverna,     Ciro’s (Kruis Street)

 STORES.   John Orrs,     The Belfast,     Greatermans,     ABC Shoes, Dodo’s,   Barnes Shoes,   Ackermans,     Ansteys later Garlics,      Katz & Lourie,     Mr. Man,      Man about Town,    Stuttafords,      Woolworths,     Deans Mans’ shop,     Skipper Bar,       O.K Bazaars,     Cuthberts,     Markhams,      Millews,       K. Marks ( curtains),    Juta's,     Bothner & Polliack (records,   Henri Lidji Gallery,   Derbers Furs,     FDF (Fruit & Dried Fruits)   Vanité (Ladies clothes)     Bradlows,      Geen & Richards,     Shepherd & Barker (Furniture),    CAN,     Jaffs (Fabrics),   Mosenthals,    Dicks (Sweets) - Rissik Street, and later on  Morkels, your two year guarantee store!   Putzys.    McCullogh & Bothwell (School Uniforms).

 REMEMBER WHEN we would get all dressed up to go to town, to have tea at Ansteys sitting alongside Ladies in beautiful outfits, white gloves, smart, elegant, men in suits, with white shirts and ties

 MUSIC  Soul music was popular in the 60s,   Aretha Franklin,   Jimi Hendrix,    Carla Thomas,    Otis Redding (“sitting on the Dock of the Bay”),  Percy Sledge (“ Midnight Hour”, and Music from Brasil, Sérgio Mendes,  Herb Alpert and the Tijuana brass.

And of course, Johnny Mathis,  Charles Aznavour,  Simon and Garfunkel, José Feliciano

And ….  REMEMBER WHEN , our Mothers would ring a little bell at suppertime, and the “servant” (oi, how COULD we have??) would come in with the next course. And when your “boy” did the garden and the “girl” cooked.  

 SHULS   Lions Shul (Doornfontein),   Wolmarans street ( Rabbi Rabinowitz 50’s and 60’s, then Chief Rabbi Casper)    Yeoville Shul (Rabbi Lapin),   Adas Yeshuran (Yeoville) ,   The Bnei Akiva Shul (Raleigh Street),  Greenside Shul,    Emmerentia,     Fordsburg,   Sydenham Highlands North,  Mayfair (Rabbi Zagenov) , Kensington Shul (Rabbi Rabinowitz),   The Curve  (Observatory),   Berea Shul (Rabbi Bender and Rabbi Aloy),    Oxford Shul (Rabbi Bernhard),   Chassidic Shul (Rabbi Lipskar)     Cyrildene,    Temple Emanuel (? and  Rabbi Assabi),  Temple Israel (Rabbi Super), Temple Shalom,   Temple Beth-El (Rabbi Ben Isaacson)   Sandton Shul (BHH) Rabbi ZS Suchard (but that was in the 70’s) Yeo Street Shul.  Reverend Symanovitz from Yeoville Beth Din.  The Beth Din was in Raleigh Street then.

 CHAZONIM. Chazen Hass,   Chazen Bagley,   Chazen Dudu Fisher (1970s early 80’s),   Chazen Johnny Glück (Wolmarans) in the eighties (Choirmaster Prof. David Cohen). Chazen Hasdan, (Warmbaths) Chazen Badash, (Yeoville, Choirmaster *Malovany) Chazan Mandel (Berea Shul) – Gus Levy choirmaster.  (* a world reknowned Chazen - I did attend a concert of his here in Jhb a number of years ago), Chazen Berele Chagy

 Yeoville Shul Choir,   Lionel Levin,   Kenny and Colin Koransky  and their father, Natie Koransky, Martin Harris, Len Bobroff,  Stanley Feinstein,  Brian Feinstein,  Robert Lapedus, David Shapiro.   The Choirmaster was Mr. Himmelstein,  I think his son Lior, was in the Choir too.  Colin Opwald.   Benny Lipchick (Z”l)

 KIDS at the Yeoville Shul…. Percy Suntup,   Fivie (Phillip) and Hymie (Z”l) Symanowitz,   Olga Berelowitz,   Joan Morris,   Karen Feinstein,   Linda and Stanley Chitiz,   Wolfie and Marlene Teper,   me and my Boet,  Robert Lapedus, Gillian Erster and her brother Moishe Erster,   Naomi Shapiro,   Marilyn & Sheila Atkins,  David Shapiro,  Rhoda Shapiro,  Jenny Winnick,    Alan Kaye,   Philip Eliason,   Sheila Hahn and Irma Keifer   I remember David and Daniel Lapin, ( Rabbi Lapin’s sons) being at the Shul  .

 Beni Akiva and Habonim Camps.   Betar.  Hashomer Ha’tza-ir (spelling, whoops!!)

 AND REMEMBER WHEN the only children at a barmitzvah function were the Barmitzvah boy and his siblings, who were allowed to stay up for the night.  The entire Simcha was for adults and the only time you heard the Barmi boy, was when he made his speech.    Robert’s Barmitzvah was a Kiddush at home after Shul, and a “tea” that evening for a few friends of my Parents.  Many kids had that kind of Barmi.  Who knew then from Theme  Barmitzvahs.  

 AND …..When Children were children, and played snakes and ladders, and ludo, dominoes, monopoly, yo-yo’s, and they read out of the Local Libraries and they played Cowboys and Indians, ( just entertained themselves.  No Video games, computers, cell phones, I-pods, Electronic everything… and No TV then either.  

BANKS and Building Societies.  Barclays,   Volkskas Bank,   Allied Building Society,  SA Perm(inent)   The UBS (United Building Society)  SA Perm,    NBS (Natal Building Society)   Trust Bank  

 ONLY IN SOUTH AFRICA ……………………………….

 J’’’’enesburg!

Ag Shame, man, were you home stokkies aleen??

Wikkel.   Sikkel.    I’ve got no tom, hey?

Koeksusters.      Konfyt.       Biltong.        Vet-koek.        Braaivleis.

Boerevors en Pap.        Poitjiekos.     Mielie.   Rooibos Tea.    

Grondboontjiebotter

Ouma se Rusks.       Fanny Farmers

“Hau”

The Tokoloshe is coming…      Dorp !   Pandotjie!  

 He rocked up in an old  Skedonk.

Question.     Hallo Meneer………. Hoe Gaan Dit met jou vandag?.     

Answer.       Ag , No…..  Fine ….Jaaaaa,……….   Kan nie Klaar Nie !

My Oom se Bakkie

My Gran did the “Charlston”, but that was back in Nineteen voetsak

Why are you still Gaan-ing on?   you  Poepal !!  

He is so Grotty….. A real Dweet …….A Drip.

It’s …Kwaai.   It’s …. Skarm.

 HOTELS : The Carlton (original Carlton) ,  Moulin Rouge,  The Chelsea Hotel (Hillbrow) (I think this is where the Jacques BREL theatre was)  Casa Mia,    Langham ,    Gresham,    the Jeppe Hotel (Norman’s Grill)     Victoria ( Plein Street near Station),  Criterion ,   Landrost hotel (Anabelles nightclub).    Tollman Towers – (next to Jeppe Street Post Office),    The President Hotel (Eloff Street),   Anlar Hotel (Hillbrow),   Courtleigh Hotel (Berea),   Jocelyn Residential Hotel (Claim Street Joubert Park),    the Quirinal,   Waldorf ,  and Balalaika which was then way out in the “country” - Sandown,  which is today, a hub of activity. The Skyline,   The Capri  and The Park Royal

 SQUAD CARS.   HOT RODS and the name Buddy Fuller comes into my head for some reason.

MOTORTOWN. Remember when all the motor dealerships were in Eloff Street, Ext.  Motortown.   And names like  Rillstone Motors (Agents for the Simca),   Lawson Motors, (Agents for Volvo),    Lucy’s Motors  (Katz) (Agents for Fiat),  Curries Motors,   Grosvenor Motors ( Agents for Ford),    Sydney Clow  (Agents for Peugeot),     and a dealeship in Anderson Street called T.A.K. Motors, (Agents for Lancia and Ferrari), Ronnie Bass,  (Sigma)

 And then Main Street became the used car center for Jhb.   Austin ,   Chevrolet,    Mercury,     Buick,    Dodge,     Morris Minor,     Mini Minor,     Hillman Minx,     Ford Fairlane,     Vauxhall Victor,     Ford Cortina,     (Ford) Zeyphyr,     Sunbeam.  Killarney Toyota.   Lionel Gilinsky (Pilot, Motor Rally Driver/Racer) Brenner Toyota in Braamfontein,        Chookie Brenner  

PETROL     Shell,    BP,   Mobil (Engen),   Sasol,    Trek,   Caltex,    Total,  

 REMEMBER WHEN Milk was delivered to the house????, in proper Milkbottles with red tinfoil caps, and the cream would be all at the top of the bottle? And Nel’s Rust Dairy in Victory Park.

 DOORNFONTEIN. – Apollo Cinema  near Crystals,  Crystals, Beit Street (who later moved to Yeoville)   Wachenheimers, Goldenbergs,  and  Nussbaums, all in Beit Street, and Dairy Alhambra (Zama Levine) - opposite the Alhambra Theatre in Beit Street. Zama Levine had the shop for about 40 years (according to his daughter Gloria Levine Ash).  Gloria’s mom was from the ICHILCHIK family (Dan Hill and Gloria’s Mom, Emma Ichilchik Levine (a cellist)  were siblings.  Dembo’s in Beit Street.   The famous sculptor Anton Von Wouw lived next door to the Alhambra and opposite Gloria Levine’s (Ash) Grandfather, Mr. Ichilchik in Doornfontein. American Café for ice-cream, Sour Kraut, Hot Dogs, Millers Antiques on Simert Road.  Campbells.  Cohen’s Café.   And Ellis Park.

Doornfontein Streets   Beit Street,   Siemert Road,   Siveright Avenue.  

And Segall’s Sausages (Alf Segall) (spelling?). Kerk Street, York House.

 ROADHOUSES.   Dolls House (Highlands North), Casablanca (Nugget Hilll) Dakota (Crown Mines), and Uncle Charlies.

Ice CREAM.  Papagallo.

 WITS RAG   Down Eloff Street, with the floats, remember?    and the Rag Queens and Princesses.   I remember one particular Jewish Rag Princess of 1971, and still a beautiful girl to this day - Blond hair, gorgeous and looks like she just stepped out of vogue magazine -   June Gervis  ( - two sons, Grant and Richard Reichlin, both  of whom were at school with my children, Angela and Gregory Brest)

 ONLY IN SOUTH AFRICA ………………………………..

“She took me around”   Around where?

And what about   “See that ou??  -   he threw me with (wif) a stone”  

The Spanspek is Vrot!

Takkies.

Ag Dame! …………………..

Listen, Lady ………………

And how many South.Africans when they first arrived in America, England, Australia, Israel etc talked about taking their “costume” or “Cozzie” to the Beach.

She’s the   most prettiest   girl.

My ou’ man caught me smoking dagga, hey, and I got such a  SKRIK.

I bumped her on the corner of Cavendish and Becker Streets 

I didn’t scale anything

*Spek and Eiers   ( *Just because I know the name, doesn’t mean I’ve eaten it, see !)

Ek is a Ware Suid Afrikaaner.

Melktert!   Guavas,   Grenadilsh!!     Marmite,   Anchovette Paste,    Jungle Oats.

Comment - That bike is Kwaai, so lekker….   Answering comment  - MOH-SELFFFFFFF

YIDDISH/Jewish sayings -   In alle Schvartze Yohren,    He lives in  Alle Drerderin,    Meerskeit,  Fahrpackt,   Fahrkakte,    Fahrkrimpt,    Fahrbrempt,   Fahrshtunkender,  Farrible (Litvak word, in other countries they talk about a “Broigas”)   He’s a Shlemazzel,   He’s a Hundt,   He’s a Chaleria,  He’s a Peruvian,  He’s a Shlemiel, …  a Chazzer ….  a Mamzer,    She’s a plapper…. a Yenta,   Gei n Drerd,   Vos  Macht Tzu?,   Shreklich,  Chader (not the Chader where we learned Hebrew or Barmitzvahs) ,  Kitke,  Lax (lox in the USA)  I need that aggravation like a loch in kop?  I’m chalishing for some Petzah (In Dublin, we called it “Calves Foot Jelly”)  Alter Kakkers ,   Bobbe Meises,   Ebberbottled.  She’s such a kochelefel.

  Question  - How are you today Bobba ‘Chuma ???

Bobba’s answer -   Nu, does it do any good to complain???      

RADIO.   LM Radio  who remembers  the signature, “Aqui  Portugal Moçambique, fala-voz do Radio club em Lourenço Marques, transmitindo ondas curtas e médias

(This is (here is) Portugal, Moçambique, the voice of the Radio club in Lourenço Marques, transmitting in short and medium wave) with Evelyn Martin (Martins) .   David Davies and the LM Hit Parade and was it a little prayer ending off at midnight ?   With a sort of mournful depressing music to accompany it. Peter de Nobrega…  not sure which station..Bob Courtney  Eric Egen Springbok Radio , Paddy O’Byrne,  David Gresham (Gruesome Gresh) and Clark MacKay (Clackie MacKay) and Esmé Euverard (not sure if she was Springok Radio or what)  Charles Fortune (Cricket commentator)  Programmes like “Pets’ Parade”, and “the Creaking Door” –skriklig !!!!     David Gresham - Gruesome Gresh - (keep your feet on the ground ,and reach for the Stars)   Everyone remembers “JOHN BERKS” !!    - “Long John Berks” -   I always listened to the Talk shows and one show in particular has stayed in my mind. The Jhb Station Master, complete with an Afrikaans accent, (guess who) called a Yiddishe guy living somewhere in Killarney, to tell him that his consignment of chickens were on their way over.  You could hear what sounded like a few thousand chickens all clucking their heads off and the poor fellow was protesting, saying that it was the wrong number, it wasn’t him, some mistake and besides, he had a small balcony, and he didn’t have room for crates of chickens, but The “Station Master” kept on saying that he has nowhere for them either, the fellows’ name and address were on the crates and the chickens were going to be on their way, shortly..  What a “lag” that was.     Although this article is about the 60s, I can’t help but mention my fellow countryman, John Robbie, and John, if you ever get to read this   “Go mbeanna Dia Duit”   and enjoy Lá na Pádraig.

  AND  the Requests – I think It might have been Esmé Euverard who ran a programme, was it called “Forces Favourites”?   with Messages from girlfriends to their ou’s in the army,  with requests like this   “ Poppie, het jy ‘n boodskap”???   Poppy, are you there?  Speak up Poppie……., Poppie??      Crackle, crackle…..   Hallo,     crackle crackle ………..   Hallo, ja, D’is Poppie wat praat,  Ag, man, I’d like to send a message to my boyfriend at Voortrekker Hoogte??????       Daw-ling, I love you Verrry much???????? ,     ek het jou lief, my skat???      I hope you are orite and I cawnt wait til you are home again awready, Vasbyt  en Baie Liefde, van Poppie, hoor?       En  Frikkie says howwzit.   LOURENÇO MARQUES.   Polana Hotel,    Avenida 24 Julho (July),     o Zambi,    o Cisno Negro (Black Swan),   Xai Xai,    S. Martinho de Bilene (aka San Martino)  wonderful beaches,     prawns to die for (*just because I said that, doesn’t mean I ate them!!!)   “Cerveja” at sidewalk cafés,   Caldo Verde (soup),   wonderful buildings, Pregos.      

BUILDINGS such as    Palace Buildings,    Rand Club,     Old Arcade,   Markhams Technical College, Manners Mansions.     Broadcast House,  Essanby House,     Ponte  -  Harrow Road,     Rissik Street Post Office,     Union Grounds – Twist and Claim,Joubert Park.     The City Hall  -  Rissik Street. And in Jeppe Street the Medical buildings ... Jenner Chambers ,    Lister Buildings,    * Drs. Jacobson,  Broer  and Smith,   later  “and Barnard”, and later still, “and Kaplan”,     Pasteur Chambers ,     Medical Centre ,  Archie Jacobson,   Ivor Broer, Mervyn  Smith.    Michael Barnard  and Neville Kaplan (not all at the same time.)

 HOSPITALS:  the Lady Dudley,     Florence Nightingale,     Princess,   Marymount,      Franklin,     Queen Victoria,     Garden City Clinic     Parklane Clinic.     Fever Hospital,    Jhb Gen. (General Hospital)    The Childrens’ Hospital,     Baragwanath.   The Frangwyn –(Maternity )

 ARMY.   The Drill Hall in Joubert Park!   Voortrekker Hoogte (Pretoria) The first 3 months you were a rookie,  and after you got out 9 months down the drag, you went to Camps for about 3 weeks a few years later. Boys  went meshugah when their hair was cut so short.

And Polio –  two major epidemics in 1947 and 1954/55, when schools were closed, and public swimming pools too, children in iron lungs and leg braces.   Infantile Paralysis, they called it. (I wasn’t here then but I know about it)

Around the late fifties, a movie came out with Danny KAYE and Barbara Bel GEDDES (Miss Ellie in Dallas) , called the “FIVE PENNIES”. Story of Red Nichols, and his young daughter (played by both Susan Gordon and Tuesday Weld)  who contracted polio.   .

And “Interrupted Melody”  Another polio movie about the Opera singer, Eleanor PARKER.  Terrible epidemic, wiped out today, as far as I know .    And then they found an immunization against Polio.

WHO REMEMBERS …...   Gilooly’s farm,    Boksburg Lake,    Zoo Lake,    Florida Lake,    Wemmer Pan - Wembly stadium   Ice rink ,   The Wilds,   The Snake Park,    Melville swimming Pool,    Hillbrow Indoor Pool  (at the Summit Club), and the   Squash courts   there,   Brixton Swimming Pool,    Rand Show/Skou,   Milner Park,  Tower of Life.

THE ELLERINE brothers,   Sidney (O”h) and Eric

RESORTS.   Lover’s  Rock in the Magaliesberg,  Little Roseneath (Ndaba, Fourways).  Margo’s (where the bands all played on a Sunday afternoon. I think it was near Bapsfontein).  And lazy days sitting on top of the Wilds, admiring the Flora and Fauna and watching the world go by (not today!)  Linksfield Ridge.

ADVERTS..   Mac Phails -  Mac won’t phail you

NAMES CHANGES     Jan Smuts Airport – O.R Tambo ,   Halfway House -  Midrand,   Verwoerdburg – Centurion,.   Hendrik Verwoerd Drive -  Bram Fischer Drive,  Hans Strydom Drive  Malibongwe,  DF Malan -   Beyers Naudé,   Harrow Rd - Joe Slovo Drive - , Sandown Square  - Nelson Mandela Square.  Transvaal – Gauteng,    Eastern Transvaal – Mapumelanga.   Warmbaths - Bela Bela,   Pietersburg - Polakwane

 NEWSPAPERS/magazines   Rand Daily Mail.   Die  Vaderland,   Die Beeld,  The Star (still going strong) Sunday Express, Sunday Times AND  Back Page of the Sunday Times…  Scope Magazine

 I thought I’d end off with a little song …………………..  anyone want to sing along?  You all know Sarie Marais?  Here we go. Een,  twee,  drie……..

My Sarie Marais is so ver van my hart,

Maar’k hoop om haar weer te sien,

Sy het in die wyk die Mooirivier gewoon,

Nog voor die oorlog het begin.

O bring my t’rug na die ou Transvaal,

daar waar my Sarie woon

daar onder in die mielies by die groen doringboom

Daar woon my Sarie Marais.

 Lekker Bly Skatties, and Alles van die Beste.  

 Anne Lapedus  (Brest)

one of the  “SIXTIES  ROCKERS” … still  ROCKING ON  !!!!

Uitlander, no more

!!!!  

 © Anne Lapedus Brest,   (Ex Dublin, Ireland)  Sandton, South Africa.

Contact details.  

digitalphoto@icon.co.za  or  annebrest@icon.co.za  

082.452.7166 .

 DISCLAIMER.  This article has been written from my memories of S.Africa from 48 years ago, and if a Shul, or Hotel, or a Club is not mentioned, it doesn’t mean that they didn’t exist, it means, simply, that I don’t remember them.  I can’t add them in, either, because then the article would not be “My Memories” any more.    

more.    

[idontfindyouthatinteresting]

 Meeting Aimee Garcia @ BFCC 2018

I know this is more Lucifer/Dexter related BUT I know lots of fannibals who watched one or both of those shows and this is the only platform I have to talk about this stuff, apologies in advance! (Also we spoke about Hannibal too!)

As I had some time in the afternoon on Saturday I thought I’d meet Aimee first and get my auto, and oh gosh isn’t just AMAZING! She’s so sweet and lovely, and she just loves Lucifer so much and that makes me love Lucifer even more! Aimee is the first non-Hannibal actor I’ve ever gone to see at any conventions like this and I couldn’t be happier with my choice on that!

So firstly I gave her a set of the Lucifer pins I did and she loved them so much she was like, THIS IS GOING ON MY INSTAGRAM STORY. I don’t know if it’s still there, but IT’S AWESOME! Here is the screen grab video I took (something new I learned this weekend.) 

Then she clocked my Mads Mikkelsen Diamond Pass poster and was like “god he’s hot” and I was like YES and we were only a few guests down from Mads. She complemented my flower crown and said “I need to get one of those!” and I said that as fannibals we love wearing them, and that Hannibal got cancelled during season 3 too, so we had a little tv-cancellation-grumble together.

We took a selfie which is super cute, and she was up and standing and ready to go for a selfie before I even asked! BABE!

She said she really wanted Ella to have to go undercover in Lucifer season 4 at a convention, and I asked what she would go as, and she said I should send a suggestion in when Season 4 starts, and I started thinking, she should totes cosplay as Beverley Katz, one badass forensic scientist going undercover dressed as another!

For my photo, after having issues during my Mads photo because of the printers I was so nearly late and ended up being last in the queue, and then the printer at Aimee’s shoot gave in too! So we took the photos twice! She loved the devil horns, took some selfies in them after. She said she had a great time over the weekend. She spoke to her fans like we were all just friends hanging out and it was lovely.

13/10 would defos recommend! What a babe!

[wlwbeverlymarsh]

The Losers in Band

These are awful and the format is awful but... here u go

Stan: -Total drum major

- He’s the one that really had to /earn/ respect. Mainly because Richie kept mocking him, so no one would take him seriously.

- Has DEFINITELY hit kids over the head with his mace a few times

- Plays trombone for concert and jazz band

Bill: -Clarinet! He’s section leader, and everyone really respects him and his abilities

- One of those Much Hated guys who never practices and never needs to.

- Never gets yelled at because of his drum major bf.

Mike: -Baritone Saxophone. Super serious about practice.

- He’s one of two, and really has to lead.

- Really good about being on step.

Beverley: -French horn, but does flags during marching season.

- One of those kids who plays several instruments, but is super modest about it. She likes bassoon a lot too.

- great player, but doesn’t know shit about music theory

Ben: -Drumline. Very scared of Stan.

- Played the second largest bass freshman year, snare sophomore year, and quads junior and senior. He really likes carrying big things.

- Much loved section leader.

- Really iffy on the bells.

Richie: -Tuba/sousaphone

- Plays the baritone too, but not as well. He’s a really good tuba player, but gets yelled at for wearing sandals to practice a lot.

- REALLY gets music theory, super smart guy

- ALWAYS missing his gauntlets or beret.

- Plays bass for jazz band

Eddie: -Plays the flute for concert band

- His mom won’t let him do marching band, so he tries to watch them at as many games as possible.

- Always first chair. Always. Always kills challenges. Really awesome at reading music.

[exploreelsewhere]

Woke up to this beautiful view and many more like it! Rafting Wood-Tikchick State Park Alaska: Lake Kulik to Beverley and Silver Horn! [OC][3024x4032] ✈

[bilbao-song]

Fuck marry kiss hug: Jon Anderson, Bev Bevan, Trevor Horn, Greg Lake

this is so hard im weeping

in order of like. realistically how much i’d actually want to do the thing lmao

marry beverley!!

hug greg lake. he looks v huggable

kiss jon anderson

trevor horn is all that is left im so sorry trevor