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thedeviljudges · 4 years ago

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the devil judge + the seven deadly sins

so, i made a gifset about who i thought falls under the seven deadly sins. and also shameless plug - please go reblog the gifset i made for this. took me ages to do.

but i figured i might as well make a meta post to correlate. so this is that post. it’s not everything i could discuss. i could be here for hours more, truth be told. but i hope it’s enough to chew on.

while i feel like a lot of these are going to be a no-brainer, i still want to talk it through because idk. i can, and i want to, and i feel like it, lmao.

gluttony

the elite are privileged and have an opportunity to indulge so much more than the general public, but in many different ways. this is shown throughout the show in the fact that they can indulge on luxury food, have political power, they can make a phone call or snap their fingers and everyone must follow their orders.

and the thing about gluttony is that there is always more to be had. you take a little and then realize it’s not enough and so you ask for more. case in point: in episode 11 when sunah suggests that yohan could be the new president, the current one gives her an alternative: dictatorship. because it wasn’t just enough for him to be an actor and the presiding president.

you’ll also know they turn in on themselves - the two other guys in the elite group. one who owns the company and the other dude - i really cannot remember their names and what they do, but y’all know who i’m talking about. it was so easy for them, when threatened, to fabricate documents to give to yohan about each other in order to get ahead. gluttony is only shared in the relationships we have until one realizes they can take a little extra of the pie. it’s the selfishness of having all the leftovers. gluttony cannot necessarily exist without someone else’s sacrifice.

lust

i kind of had an ah-ah moment when i was talking this over with @technitango. i was trying to decide who was going to be lust because lust is portrayed very, very differently in this show than what most of us are used to. we, of course, know sunah who lusts after a life of indulgence and riches because she equates that with respect more than actually wanting it because it’s monetarily worth something.

but then i realized the public is lust because of their need for justice. i won’t say revenge necessarily because they’re doing as they’re told when given the judge show. but we can quickly see how that evaporates into something akin to bloodlust, for criminals and people who normally get away with shit, to have their fair taste at conviction for their misdeeds. we even see it with yohan’s fanboy club - the lust that comes from adoration and dedication.

and even more so, the public is easily swayed and so is the nature of lust. it follows in the vein of needs and wants, and as soon as new information is presented, however may false, so does the wants and desires of what people want sway. how easy was it for them to turn on yohan for a split second on two occasions - on two accounts of bribery.

envy

envy, above all, is about wanting what others have because you do not have it yourself. it may not be exactly what they have, but a form of it. some people don’t necessarily want money - they want what it can by, which is time, health and material goods.

sunah is the perfect example of this. she envies respect and recognition. she talks about bright and shiny objects, and that’s true to her kleptomania tendences, but more than anything, she wants to be seen as an equal because being poor with a vastly different upbringing means she’s looked down upon by those she thinks matters.

which also begs the question why she feels the need to seek validation from people in higher statuses to begin with when she can be the exception and not the rule - form her own understanding and environment to show others that the typical way of the elite is not actually all it’s cracked up to be - to which we see when she has no one to celebrate her victory with. it’s lonely being at the top. you get to your goal you thought you wanted but then what?

more importantly, sunah also envies family, relationships and simply put, human interaction. she wants to be cared for and treasured, and she looks for that in her position of power. because then all eyes are on you. because then that’s what people care about. what she fails to see is that those eyes are just as fruitless and just as wavering. to be a leader means people loving the idea of you but not you as a person.

“people of envious nature are sometimes stimulated to seek to emulate those who have completed some great achievements and in doing so achieve something great for themselves,” according to Understanding Philosophy.

wrath

while i realize that gaon not might entirely fit the wrath trope, he certainly has his moments, and i think he’s lived with a tampered flame since his parent’s death. he just learned to briefly put it out in the form of distractions and a false sense of righteousness and justice. it isn’t until he meets yohan that someone finally gives him the okay to feel the entirety of his emotions, that lets him breath and tells him it’s okay to feel anger and hurt. and while gaon ultimately chooses not to exact revenge, his wrath is what led him to becoming a judge and walking away from his teenage crimality.

gaon transposed his wrath into seeking justice, transformed it into livelihood, and reformed his narrative so that he was no longer angry and a teen with rash emotions. it was simply redirected and never really forgotten. yohan turned that redirection back around onto gaon’s ultimate heartache. fueled with that, it became easier to justify himself and his actions.

the most pivotal moment of turning his back on this mindset is, of course, the minister’s suicide, where he takes a good look at himself and doesn’t like what he sees. at this point, gaon’s upset isn’t necessarily at yohan but at the situation in which they got themselves into. because the thing is, gaon doesn’t absolve himself from what they did. he doesn’t turn a blind eye to that and try to dismiss it. he owns up to what happened and confesses how he feels to yohan and how he has to leave for his own good, and in some indirect way, for yohan’s, too.

with yohan, his ultimately weakness, despite never admitting to it, is family. his wrath comes in the form of anger when the ones he loves are threatened. yohan lives by a moral code of loyalty because that means you won’t be abandoned, and as a child who lived with that verdict since the day he was born, it’s an ever-pressing theme of his.

thing is, wrath comes in two particular forms for yohan. again, one is family and the second is the rose-colored glasses he’s given himself in his revenge story. he’s always had a goal to presumably make right the wrong for taking away isaac, but within that, 10 years is a long time to plot revenge, to the point where it becomes so much easier to lose yourself to that, to become enraged with it and forget the initial goal all along. we see this in his inability to form the bonding moments needed with his niece and his casual throwaway comments over people’s lives - the comment he made to gaon about moving on to the next plan, and the ultimately nail in the coffin of pushing gaon to leaving him.

his fury has also led him to convince himself his own humanity is nothing short of a lie. therefore, it’s easier to justify the means to an end because of his own self-worth and self-deprecation. it’s almost like a self-fulfilling prophecy: he even admitted to gaon’s mentor that he is an abyss. he’s referred to himself as nothing but an animal or a monster - all characteristics of despondency to survive and to justify what he’s doing. sort of like a catch 22, yohan claims he’s an animal/monster and behaves as such, but because he behaves as such, it means he’s an animal/monster.

wrath for gaon and yohan are very different yet the same. they are slow-burning, and that’s a dangerous type. it’s actually interesting when you think about the fire imagery surrounding the two of them because flames are quick to lap at anything in its wake, to destroy within a matter of minutes. and yet for the two of these men, their internal fire eats them from the inside out, painfully, until they’re almost unrecognizable to others and to themselves.

sloth

sloth was a little more difficult to pinpoint because of its characteristics. it was either the minister versus the mentor, both of which i think could work in this role. however, i chose the minister simply because she’s featured more and intertwines heavily with the plot line.

soth is a medieval translation of the Latin term acedia, meaning “without care.”

the ultimate characteristic of sloth is often identified as laziness, and while it’s easy to argue that the minister hasn’t been lazy in her ability to get where she is, she became as much when she started lying to get to her position. isn’t lying known as the easier way out? it absolves you of responsibility, of putting in the hard work, of apologizing and making things right. in the end, she had a goal and found the easiest solution to get there through her lack of responsibility for the roles she more than likely swore an oath to.

but that also translates into the other attributes of sloth: a failure to do the right thing, lack of emotions for people or of the self, and the fact that it “hinders man in his righteous undertakings and thus becomes a terrible source of man’s undoing” according to The Seven Deadly Sins: Society and Evil.

while i think there are a lot of components of sloth that may not necessarily fit the minister, the apathy and carelessness are enough to showcase her aggression, despondency and restlessness when what little efforts she does put in do not go her way. another interesting thing to note is that many of sloth’s traits correspond with symptoms of mental illness, such as depression and anxiety. it’s an interesting thing to note given the way the minister chooses to end her life.

greed

i don’t know that jinjoo would’ve had any provocation to the limelight if it wasn’t for sunah’s direction, but she’s eager to please and wants to be useful. it’s only natural for her to want more because it’s clear she’s a career woman, loves her job and has a heart for serving the people.

but like gluttony, greed is also that little thing that plants itself and can take on a life of its own. you start looking for justifications as to why you can’t have more than what you do, and in jinjoo’s situation, she’s already overlooked through no fault of her own. and it’s not that gaon and yohan are doing it purposefully, which is what makes their neglect heartbreaking, because truthfully, they’re after the same thing jinoo is. sure, it looks different and the foundation of it is different, same with their motives. but they’re all three judges on a residing bench working to exact justice - even if all three of them have their own personal agenda.

i don’t think jinoo fully aligns with greed, but she does want more for herself, and i think that’s only natural. you can tell she has a heart, and she’s keen not to be overlooked. this isn’t her pain point so much as it is she knows her worth and is more than ready to do what it takes to get where she wants. this, in and of itself, isn’t necessarily a bad trait, but we can see how it leads to being deceived, especially for someone who’s been left in the dark for so long.

she is enticed by the glitz and the glamour of being a head judge, but you can tell she feels some remorse and guilt for those thoughts at times. i think her sense of greed is a battle within herself more than it is extremely outwardly.

pride

soohyun’s pride comes in the form of her imbalance with right and wrong. her sense of righteousness and justice is so far leaning, even more than gaon’s. it can be chalked up to her being a cop, but we’ve seen instances of this outside of her role within that agency. her pride doesn’t let her see beyond saving gaon and getting to the bottom of every mystery that comes her way.

it also comes in the form of impulsiveness and her savior complex, putting elijah in danger, for example, instead of waiting for backup. it’s not necessarily from a belief that she can fix things all on her own, but she sees injustice and immediately jumps in. another case in point is her and gaon watching yohan wreck the minister’s son’s car. she’s ready to go stop him, but gaon pulls her back, most likely because at that point, they hadn’t been observing the situation for very long to get a read on it. also the fact that at that point, neither of them truly knew yohan and his capabilities.

but as to where her characteristics come from, we simply don’t know beyond that of gaon. it’s unfortunate because we don’t have much of her backstory, so there is no real understanding why she so firmly believes in entities of regulation beyond keeping her friend out of jail. she prides herself on her work and what she’s able to accomplish, which is why it’s devastating to her to have to protect gaon by cleaning up his bloody handprint.

aristotle is of the belief that, “pride, then, seems to be a sort of crown of the virtues; for it makes them greater, and it is not found without them. Therefore it is hard to be truly proud; for it is impossible without nobility and goodness of character,” from Nicomachean Ethics.

but pride for soohyun isn’t about honors or rewards. it’s for herself and her capabilities, her ability to protect gaon, and the virtues she’s set as the precedent for herself. because sometimes it’s not even about establishing morals and ethics upon yourself. it’s about feelings/intuition, logic and observation. and no, i don’t mean the feelings she has for gaon. there are things that humans do, both actions and words, that we inherently know are bad without someone telling us as much and without the rules of the world seared into our brains. there are some things we know, for a fact, are wrong to us as individuals.

for soohyun, she knows that gaon’s actions, and even her own, have consequences. from what we’ve seen, i think it can be argued that it’s really about not doing those actions to prevent an outcome - not necessarily from a place of being just and right. that doesn’t mean she doesn’t understand good morals/ethics, but again, we have no background of what her internal guidance actually is.

to put this in layman’s terms, we’ll use gaon wanting to stab the conman in his youth. soohyun knows it’s wrong because it will incriminate gaon and therefore she stops it. gaon’s gone to her because he sees her as a moral compass. but is her own internal navigation rooted in justice the way gaon had to find it in the judicial system, or is hers rooted in her pride of keeping gaon safe? she stops him from doing things that will get him in trouble, but is she stopping him because the action itself is wrong or because the outcome will result in undesirable consequences for the two of them?

and of course, there is a flipped argument to be had there - i’m not arguing that gaon stabbing the conman would be right or justified. but what i am saying is that for her, her worldview is the only right one, and when anyone steps out of that, even gaon, it becomes a bit of an issue: the pride she has for that is palpable.

every character indulges

truthfully, every character has at least one form of these sins rooted in their characterization. some are larger than others, but the breadth of it can be explored even further for each. and that’s what makes them more realistic and not just characters written on a page or following a linear progression of their writing deity.

the seven deadly sins are also notoriously rooted in religion. they’re also a defining feature of aristotle’s works that represent the golden mean, in which each vice is parallel to a virtue.

the devil judge is so layered, but i think at the heart of it, it’s about humanity at its core. sprinked in are the philosophies and contradictions and what it means to look in the mirror, what happens when we’re blind to seeing our true selves and most importantly, how much changes when we’re swayed by our own misgivings. it really asks us to understand nature versus nurture, that people must find a belief in something to keep them going, and how futile our hopes and desires can actually be if we’re not carefully regulating ourselves, nevermind the entities established by society to regulate us, too.

the entirety of the show genuinely begs the question as to who is truly right, who is truly wrong, and if it’s even possible to find the correct answer.

#x #the devil judge #the devil judge meta #*#*the devil judge #so i have some Thoughts #probably not very good ones but ya know

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animeyanderelover · 5 years ago

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It’s been a while since I posted Hc’s so I decided to do it. In this Hc’s the s/o is a human.

Tw: Yandere themes, unhealthy mindset, unhealthy relationship, possessiveness, obsessiveness, delusions, stalking, strictness, manipulation, mentions of kidnapping, mentions of killing

Yandere Grim Reaper Hc’s

Grell Sutcliff

🟥Grell is definitely a stalker. She watches her darling nearly all the time when they’re sleeping, eating, taking a shower. She takes tons of pictures from them, making sure to capture everything. She’s also the obsessive type, stealing the s/o’s clothes and wears them, enjoying the wonderful scent of her darling on them.

🟥Also the possessive type, the thought that her darling belongs to only her gets this girl excited and she makes sure that this dream will become reality. Clingy as fuck, when she’s near her darling she’s basically glued to their hips all the time.

🟥She’s possessive and clingy, not a good mix. She despises it when someone else is talking to her darling and is quick to act on it. She’ll smile at the person with her razorsharp teeth and that’s enough to scare anyone away. But she makes sure that this person gets a “little lesson” later.

🟥She’s willing to get messy for the s/o, even if it means troubles with William. Grell kills anyone as long as it means having her s/o for herself. She’ll beat that person bloody and brutally up before ending their life.

🟥For a long time she just watches you before deciding to kidnap you. Even though she has fun with killing all the people who dare to try to take you away from her, at some point she gets a little bit annoyed. But don’t worry too much, I can absolutely see her as someone who wants to do outside activities with her darling. If you behave, she’ll take you out quite often by herself.

🟥Grell is in my opinion a bit creepy, but also incredibly sweet and charming to you. She loves cuddling you or wearing your clothes and makes sure to shower you in affection and gifts. Expect a lot of cuddles. Loves doing couple things with you. She might also try to convince her darling to become a grim reaper. The thought of you and her being together for the rest of your long lifetimes and ending people’s life together makes this girl jump around thrilled.

Ronald Knox

😃Ronald strikes me as a manipulative one. This guy is very sociable and charming as well, he knows what to say to get the s/o to stay with him. He’ll manipulate his darling without them noticing and for some reason the s/o finds themself distancing from everyone. It’s all Ronald’s fault. Pretty clingy as well with a small mix of possessiveness.

😃Also an obsessive one. Ronald has a huge interest in the lifestyle of humans and he’s most interested in his darling’s lifestyle. He makes sure to find out as much as possible about them so he can always talk with them about things he knows they like. This lets his darling instantly feel a connection between the two of them when they talk. Do not wonder if he sometimes stares at you with lovesick eyes because that is what he is.

😃Ronald is as mentioned charming and funny, knowing how to make a place in your heart. Times spend with him are always funny and great and since he manipulates you into distancing yourself from others and spend all your time with him there’s most of the time no reason to get jealous. But if the s/o insists on spending time with others he’ll get jealous and guilt trip them hard.

😃Ronald only kills someone if they possess a threat towards his darling, meaning if they like the s/o or want to harm them. Then they’re dead the same night. Screw the paper work, you’re worth it.

😃Ronald wouldn’t want to kidnap the s/o hoping that he can rely on his charm to win their heart. He only kidnaps his darling if they try to avoid him or start to fall for someone else. That’s when Ronald gets slightly angry. He spends so much time with the s/o and is always there for them and they thank him like this?! That’s a big no for him. He really wanted to not do it, but now it seems like it can’t be helped, right?

😃He’s one of the better ones because he’s just so funny, charming and in general a nice person. It would be definitely hard for you to not fall in love with this guy even after he kidnapped you. Will also try to convince you to become a grim reaper.

William T. Spears

📒William is in my opinion a stalker, choosing to watch the s/o most of the time from the distance and making notes about their every movements what makes him the obsessive type as well. The s/o will always feel watched, no matter where they are!

📒He’s also the aware Yandere, he knows that these feelings he has for you aren’t normal. I believe at first he tried to avoid the s/o, thinking he could get his feelings under control, but he realized that this was a huge lie to himself. Also a strict Yandere, as soon as he has his darling, he expects a lot from them.

📒Calm and collected. This guy feels jealousy, but can endure it very well. It takes a while for him until he loses it. But then he makes sure to remove that little problem.

📒He hates extra work and tries to avoid it, but if someone pushes his limits then he makes sure to find a way to give that person an early death.

📒Kidnapping is the last option for him and he’ll only resort to it if he can’t get rid of someone else who stands in his way. He makes sure to have the perfect strategy to kidnap the s/o.

📒Calm, collected, strict and cold is a frightening mix in a Yandere, but also has it’s advantage. He has almost infinite patience with you and takes care of your needs very well. This guy has most likely your whole day scheduled and makes sure that you behave. He wants the both of you look perfect together and this guy will force you to become a grim reaper whether you like it or not.

Undertaker

⚰️Undertaker is such a two faced guy which is perfectly reflected in his Yandere behavior. On the one hand he’s clingy and obsessive. Undertaker never thought that the life of other humans was really interesting, but the s/o managed to change that. Suddenly there’s more to it and he wants to find out what exactly about his darling’s life fascinates him so much. This guy will somehow always bump into his darling, will always be in the same places they are.

⚰️But on the other hand he’s also very possessive, manipulative and overprotective. He lost already much with the death of the Earl Phantomhive and as a Grim Reaper he knows how fragile human’s life are. So he makes sure that nothing happens to the s/o. This guy has such an easy time to fool you without you noticing since you’re only familiar with his goofy side and don’t know his dark secrets.

⚰️Jealousy? Not for too long! He gets jealous easily as soon as someone else makes his darling smile and laugh. Only he should make them smile and laugh like this! That person won’t live long enough to witness the next day.

⚰️Different from the other Grim Reapers on the list Undertaker has retired a long time ago and doesn’t need to care over troubles with superior Reapers or extra paper work. He’s free to kill everyone who stands in his way with the s/o and that’s exactly what he does. Persons who make him jealous, hurt his darling or are a threat for them. No harm shall ever come to his darling and he’s ready to slaughter everyone for their safety.

⚰️Undertaker will kidnap his s/o rather quickly simply because he’s too worried for their safety. But don’t worry for someone who kills so willingly he makes sure that you’re as comfortable as possible.

⚰️I would put him in a yellow zone because of his two faced character. He has no mercy for everyone who harms you, but he’ll treat you like a fragile little doll, always careful to not harm you. If you try to escape he locks you in a coffin for a few hours before letting you out again, nothing more. He’s such a sweetheart for you, always joking to see that smile on your face and always giving you so much affection and love. But it’s scary to see when he cuts someone in half for causing you pain. He will find a way to extend your lifetime. The question is if it will be through legal or illegal actions because this guy doesn’t care for that.

#yandere black butler #yandere kuroshitsuji #yandere grell #yandere grell sutcliff #yandere ronald #yandere ronald knox #yandere william #yandere william t. spears #yandere undertaker

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woeismyhoe · 4 years ago

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Rachel Amber, The Broken Angel Who Demonized Herself

Fair warning, please bear with this probably incredibly **longass** (I’m not kidding it’s rlly long) analysis of one of the fandom’s most controversial disliked characters, Rachel Amber. This is just my attempt to analyze her character based on observation from BtS to LiS so by no means do you have to accept them. Productive discussions are obviously very welcomed :D

In LiS, when we asked about Rachel around campus, most of them had nothing but compliments and praises for the missing girl. She was essentially an honorary Vortex Club member who socialised with the snobs, yet she also hung out with the skater stoners and was friendly with those at the bottom of the social hierarchy. Then we see those graffiti around where it hints at Rachel’s promiscuity, debts and conflicts with other people. That’s the first sign we see that Rachel Amber isn’t as perfect as everyone was making her out to be. Afterwards we discover that Rachel was a stoner herself and into whatever drugs there were, partied harder than anyone else, promiscuous, entered a relationship with local drug dealer Frank Bowers while having a secret relationship with Psycho teacher Mark Jefferson— all while maintaining a 4.0 GPA in her studies and being considered perfect and adored by practically everyone in her school. The girl’s incredible, obviously, or maybe scary for someone to be so spread out in everything.

Rachel was a straight A student with a 4.0 GPA, an administrative assistant to the Principal, beloved by students and faculty alike, literal goddess beauty, had ambitions to be a model and study international law, daughter of the DA and was the closest to perfection anyone would ever be— so what went wrong? What made her romanticise the idea of running away from a town where everyone loves and adores her?

Because of the above.

Yes, it may sound whiny and dramatic to feel tired of being loved and being the center of attention all the time, but there’s no point to it if it’s not you who they adore, but the person you’re pretending to be— (“I was feeling angsty and reckless. Tired of living up to the perfect image everybody expects out of me.”) —especially when you have to do so much just to maintain the lie.

Throughout LiS and BtS, Rachel’s ability to get along with everyone was always mentioned. At face value she was akin to a social butterfly. She hung out with stoners regardless of their social status (skaters or the vortex club), was friendly with anyone regardless of their place in the social hierarchy (eg; Daniel/Evan/Steph/Drew/Nathan) or even to strangers others usually ignored (Samuel/Homeless lady). Like Evan said, Her friends were her friends. She wasn’t one to let peer pressure affect her relationships so she wasn’t afraid to make all those acquaintances.

However, for those who knew her closely (Chloe and Jefferson), she was referred to as a chameleon, someone who blended in with everyone and everywhere seamlessly. This was an important detail regarding who Rachel was and her intimacy with others. To be able to make that comparison, they would’ve needed to know who the person Rachel actually was underneath the masks she’d created over the years. Chloe was the first to truly see and accept her for who she was. Jefferson was the one who exploited her for it.

For most, being a social chameleon would count as a beneficial social skill if they’re subtle. So long as the person doesn’t lose themselves in the process and is able to separate their personas from their true self, it remains a skill and will be used as such.

The problem with Rachel was that it transcended beyond a skill. A social chameleon was *what* she became, and that led to losing her own sense of identity, to becoming a stranger in her own body.

We see her confiding to Chloe about this feeling in Brave New World: (“Do you think there’s a point when you’ve been acting so much that you don’t even have your own personality anymore? You’re just whatever you think other people want you to be?”) —to which Chloe tells her she does have a personality because she assumed Rachel was talking about herself. But Rachel apparently wasn’t and clarifies she was talking about her father. She then elaborates on how her father doesn’t really exist, that how he was in the principal’s office was a mere performance and then the actual truth— that she’s afraid she’ll end up like him.

No matter how you interpret that scene, the conclusion is that one of Rachel’s fears was becoming like James— someone who’s been so wrapped up in all the lies and manipulation that he no longer seemed recognisable to even his own daughter.

At that point her defence mechanism of deflection and avoidance came into play after Chloe got a little too close to home. We first see this on the train scene when they play Two Truths and a Lie. Rachel gave factual statements as opposed to Chloe who gave facts that elaborated into her personal life. At one point Chloe can ask how Rachel knew about having a distal radius fracture and It’s a very minor detail, but when she explains that it’s because she broke her wrist when she was 10, she says it extremely fast. When Chloe is about to press for more info about something personal no matter what option you choose, Rachel dismissively turns around the conversation from herself back to Chloe again.

The next time we see her deflecting is right after witnessing her father cheating. When Chloe asks about her, Rachel deflects and guilt trips her into somehow thinking she’s at fault for failing to get them wasted and then proceeds to drown her sorrows into alcohol instead of opening up. Afterwards when they find the junkyard, Rachel chooses to isolate herself from Chloe and withdraws to the corner, getting irritated if Chloe chooses to invade her space. When Chloe confronts her about her sudden moodiness, Rachel yet again deflects and shifts the attention to Chloe by essentially telling her she’s self-centred. This scene was classic Deflection 101 brought by Rachel’s defence mechanism to cope with her father’s betrayal.

Rachel uses deflection and avoidance as a defence mechanism, a habit which stems from the dynamics of the Amber family. When you have a Politician as a father whose life work is to manipulate and lie, and a Stepford Wife as a mother who wilfully acts like a servant to her husband out of sacrifice and duty— an environment of deceit and suppression of one’s feelings will be fostered. This is what shapes Rachel to be distrusting and unhealthily altruistic as we see in BtS.

And so Rachel’s deflection is driven by 2 things: mistrust (James) and her unhealthy altruism (Rose).

As a district attorney, James unfortunately carried his work persona into his personal life and can be presumed to lie to even his own family on a daily basis to the point that Rachel can tell when he’s lying: (“When your Dad is the District Attorney, I guess lying is...something you're used to.”) (Why can't you just tell me the fucking truth?! Stop lying! Stop being a politician for one fucking minute! Can’t you just be my Dad?”) What that tells us is that Rachel’s actually used to being lied at and treated with cynicism, so naturally that would make her guarded around others. Not to mention since James often exercised his professional prerogative (just recall how he spoke to Chloe and her comment about his micro-aggressions towards his own family), it’s most likely that he was also cynical towards people in general and carried that mindset forward at Rachel as well.

As for Rose, you have to really observe how she carried herself and her choice of words. A lot of people pointed out how robotic she sounded and blamed it on bad voice acting, but I think that was actually intentional. She was too mannered, too submissive and too robotic as a person. It’s not exactly a bad thing, but a lot of her personality seemed to be too... *political* for the sake of her husband’s political career. It was altruistic in the way that she sacrificed her own needs for her husband’s and was unfailingly supportive (eg; preparing dinner all by herself, *respectfully* asking James for his drink, even going so far as to excuse James for kissing Sera like wtf). Point is, Rose was the stereotypical political wife whose job was to shut up, look good and smile for her husband while he does the talking. At one point in the dinner scene when they start fighting, James even dared to say ‘Rose, let me handle this’ as if Rose’s voice was irrelevant and unimportant to the table (when he literally just got exposed for cheating lmao).

So what happens when your family environment consists of a father who actively lies and uses manipulation to twist facts, expects you to be compliant in exchange for rewards (birthday money), has the ability to read people, and a mother who does too much for someone who does the barest minimum for the family and represses herself for the sake of others? An environment of deceit and suppression will be fostered, and you develop all of their qualities, for better or worse. That’s difficult to change when your own family dynamics molded you to be that way and then reward you for it. If you recall, Rachel’s mannerisms changed completely when in front of her family and if Chloe complained about having to play the goody two shoes formal well-behaved humorless girl, Rachel would say: ‘try doing it your whole life’. So not only was she playing different roles in school but evidently at home as well.

But It’s not as if the Amber family was aware of the toxic environment they’d created. That’s just what their normal was: to be well-mannered, formal, professional, mature and well-articulated.

This is where Rachel’s social chameleon tendencies develops. Social chameleons usually have reasons for blending in when it comes to personal relationships:

1. Being liked is important for them (they value what people think of them).

2. They want to blend in so as to not stand out (they don’t like attention).

3. They’re doing it to make the other person comfortable (the needs of others come first before theirs).

Considering how Rachel was extremely popular, active in all sorts of school activities and enjoyed the attention of being the star, no. 2 is out. She confessed to wanting to stop being a social chameleon and didn’t seem to care much about Victoria’s dislike of her + she also did it to her family so no. 1 is out as well, which leaves us to no. 3— doing it for the comfort of others. In other words, because she *gave too much shit about other people all the time*.

What further supports the point of Rachel’s unhealthy altruism is what she says to Chloe at the junkyard— (“Maybe you should try giving a shit about other people for once.”) —which essentially tells us that she’s been doing exactly that to be able to lecture Chloe into following her own perspective. Another example would be what she tells Chloe during their therapy session: “—Because she was tired of having to give so many fucks all the time.”

One thing however that all *extreme* social chameleons share is the fact that they **loathe** themselves, or at the very least— dislike who they are. Why else would they go all the trouble of creating different personas for everyone to the point of forgetting their own, if they actually liked themselves?

One of the many things that Chloe and Rachel shared in common was their self-awareness in how undeniably shitty they can be, and that they hated who they were. Whereas Chloe embraced that whole part of her down her self destructive road, Rachel tried to cover hers up by playing other roles for people. Both girls played their sides to the ends of the spectrum; Chloe being selfish (causing problems for everyone in general unnecessarily) and Rachel being selfless (posing no problem for anyone in general even if there was a problem). They had no healthy balance and their unhealthy mindset ultimately drove them down a self destructive path.

Rachel knew she was selfish by nature, and that she’d take it out on Chloe in Ep 1. That’s why instead of talking about what was wrong, she chose to drown herself to alcohol and distance herself from Chloe. When Chloe confronts her about it, she either tells her that not everything revolves around her or that she should try giving a shit about people for once. In other words, ‘Other people have bigger problems than you so shut up and don’t make it worse for them.’ That was Rachel’s mentality and in that moment of poor lapse in judgment, she applied that logic to Chloe expecting her to think the way she does— to put others before yourself.

With Rachel, she always had her walls up and couldn’t help it even if she wanted to because it's practically second nature to have her guard up (“I never said how dearly I hold thee; my habit's been to keep my soul well-draped.“). It’s only in her lowest vulnerable moments is when she finally let her walls down because that’s when she’s too tired to keep them up.

Luckily (or unluckily) for Rachel, she recognized her problem. The only thing is that she didn’t know how to solve them. She confided to Chloe about feeling like she doesn’t exist, but then backtracked and clarified she was talking about her dad instead when Chloe got too close to home. Even IF she was genuinely talking about her father, it doesn’t erase the fact that she believed there was a possibility she was going to become like him— because she already saw the signs and made the comparison between them.

Remember her infamous outbursts in Awake? Unlike Chloe, she’s the type who keeps everything bottled in until it’s too much. Seeing her father kissing another woman was the breaking point and that’s why she reacted badly. And then when she kicked that bin, that was equivalent to Chloe smashing up the junkyard. And then that scream. That scream was the result of years bottling her pent up frustration, stress, anger at everyone including herself. Because she did everything to make her family proud, to please everyone to the point that she felt so empty and hollow, only to realize that it was all for nothing because her father was destroying her family. It wasn’t just a betrayal from her father but a betrayal to herself.

And then there’s Chloe Price. The girl who is the total opposite of her, yet who she can somehow still connect with at the same time. While she cared too much about what others thought, Chloe gave absolutely no fucks. That was her most attractive and admirable quality for Rachel. So what does she do? She latches onto Chloe to do exactly what she knows best. Become the ideal version of whoever wants her to be. In other words, the Rachel Amber who would finally give no fucks.

Rachel was the closest to her truest self when she was around Chloe. Just as she brought life and hope back into the girl’s life, so did Chloe for her. Chloe broke the walls she put up, and she’d seen her vulnerable enough times to let her mask slip. Chloe saw her at her lowest, ugliest self even when she wasn’t doing her usual thing of keeping everyone around her happy, yet she didn’t mock or leave her for it. For the first time, she was selfish, and *still* Chloe came back. That was a BIG reason to trust each other for the both of them. And that’s ultimately what bonded them for so long— the fact that they could be the shittiest people on earth, yet still see the best in each other even if they only see the worst in themselves.

Chloe was the first one to see through her social chameleon act because she slipped, and she continued to let her unmask who she was because that night Rachel just didn’t care enough to hold up the act any longer. This detail of Rachel’s chameleon act slipping *only* when something was wrong is a vital part in understanding the context around her. The first time was when she witnessed her whole world crash, the second was when she realized she was becoming like James, and the third was when she discovered what a monster James was. The fourth— when she asked that trucker for a drive out and didn’t bother to be her usual social chameleon self. We may never know what happened, but something wrong was going on in Rachel’s life that she didn’t want Chloe to be a part of— because why would she put the girl who stuck by her during her darkest hours through her bullshit again?

But at the end of the day, that wasn’t enough. Chloe wasn’t enough. And that’s understandable because a teenager truly can’t and shouldn’t have to be responsible for someone else’s happiness. No matter what choice Chloe makes at the end of BtS, the truth inevitably gets out and leads to Rachel having a fall out with her parents. When that happened, she lost a big pillar of her support system which only leaves her with Chloe who’s another emotionally damaged teen that’s on the road to self-destruction. Chloe can’t help others without helping herself first. But still, who else is there to make them feel a little less shitty except each other?

After her fall out with her parents and her father in particular, she seemed to have developed a taste for men twice her age: Frank Bowers (32) and Mark Jefferson (38). Whatever the reason her relationship with Frank was, she still wrote him those letters and seemed to have cared for him to some extent. Not only was he the source for drugs for her very much needed escape, but he was also the man who helped save her life in one of her most vulnerable moments, and a possible lead to find Sera. It’s not that surprising she’d seek comfort and safety in his arms when he already proved himself once. But clearly it wasn’t serious because she was fooling around with Jefferson at the same time (and Frank knew they wouldn’t have lasted anyway).

Now, Jefferson. The devs confirmed that Rachel was in love with Jefferson and honestly, that’s the least surprising thing ever considering how he basically had the female population of Blackwell head over heels for him. Even Rachel wasn’t immune to that psychopath’s charm. He was a well reputable photographer, had the connections to propel her modeling career, was attractive and mysterious and apparently a damaged soul. He was the perfect one way ticket out of Arcadia Bay. He was her photographer and she was his muse. He was basically the perfect solution to her problems.

The girl clearly had deep rooted daddy issues and was ashamed of it herself since she couldn’t even share her secret relationship to the one person she trusted the most despite sharing her other relationships with her (except Frank).

This is where the drugs and partying come in. They’re a way for her to escape the bullshit in her life for a few hours. Chloe was what made her feel real, but the drugs and partying was what made her forget— forget that her biological mother chose drugs and money over her (twice), forget that her own father was so despicable that he was planning to overdose Sera (this is what Chloe said in the silent dialogue), forget that her biological mother may just be dead somewhere because of James, forget that her own family was a lie, forget all the expectations placed upon her, forget that she herself was a lie, forget that she was so insecure that she had to seek warmth and safety in the arms of men twice her age, forget the guilt of knowing the girl who would die for her was still not enough, forget that at the end of the day all her problems is caused by her own mind and that her own fears had come to reality. And she hated herself for that.

But still, Rachel wasn’t a total junkie or outwardly self destructive to the point that she abandoned her studies like Chloe did. She didn’t let the drugs and partying dictate her life, hence the 4.0 GPA. After all, she still had a reputation to maintain. She was still the DA’s daughter, and getting into college was still a way to get out of Arcadia Bay.

BUT SEE, that was exactly Rachel’s problem. She could never choose which to be; The Problematic Junkie of a Disappointment (Sera), or the Golden Child (James & Rose) everyone expected her to be. She wanted to be as free as Chloe, but she also didn’t want to be a disappointment. She was tired of everything but couldn’t allow herself to fall because it was her nature to demand the best of herself for others as long as she could do it. But what happens when it’s your very own nature you’re going against? It gets really complicated. So instead of choosing, she doesn’t and becomes both. That was ultimately the worst decision she ever made.

Make no mistake, Rachel was an absolute idiot for being so indecisive. She could have easily solved her problems if she just finally gave no shit and did whatever she wanted to. But that’s the problem with people who’re labeled as perfect growing up. They eventually believe it and demand perfection of themselves. They care too much about everything because if they have the ability to be perfect, then why would you choose not to be? When someone is seen to be perfect, disappointment is 10x worse. Even Chloe was guilty of idealizing Rachel to be this perfect girl and was disappointed when she realized Rachel was just like everyone else who puts in hard work—(“Rachel's always made being an A student seem so easy. Almost sad to see all this... effort."), but it’s Chloe accepting Rachel for who she was despite no longer being the perfect girl she believed her to be that mattered.

With being seen as perfect usually comes with the assumption that your whole life is. Just as everyone invalidated her problems because she’s Little Miss Perfect with the perfect grades and the seemingly perfect family, so did she.

‘Cause hey, what does she have to be mad about when she’s a rich white girl who’s been given everything she’s ever wanted, right? (James basically said that). At that point the only problem Rachel had was that she was acting as the perfect daughter and perfect friend and perfect student at the expense of her own happiness, and then throw in the sudden slap in the face that it was all for nothing because her father was destroying the family she’d tried so hard to do proud.

But then again even if that wasn’t enough reason to spiral, it really would mess you up if your own father told you that your biological mother chose money and drugs over you, that everything you’ve done so far was all for a lie and worst of all, that your own father was going to kill your biological mother and there’s nothing you can do to change that. I mean really, I’m not a therapist or anything but I wouldn’t be surprised if Rachel’s mental health was suffering by that point.

I mean get this: she abused drugs and partied harder than anyone else and got wasted even though she knew they were wrong (Sera would’ve been a painful reminder), slept around with older men who undoubtedly took advantage and controlled her, continued to act like the perfect student and pretended to be someone she’s not just to keep everyone happy even though it was causing her to question her own existence— it’s almost as if she was punishing herself for continuing down that path.

Ultimately what Rachel was running away from was who she had become in Arcadia Bay. Once she’d be out, she wouldn’t be Little Miss Perfect anymore. She wouldn’t be the DA’s daughter. She wouldn’t have to keep lying. She would be able to start over. She would just be Rachel Amber, the nobody.

She cared too much in contrast to Chloe’s ‘I don’t give a shit’ attitude, and that’s why she still managed to maintain her perfect image even when she was already so broken. Whereas Chloe’s first instinct was to blame others, Rachel’s was to blame herself. Both never had a healthy balance when it came to accepting responsibility and that’s what connected them so well together.

Call it selflessness or selfishness or stupidity or melodrama, but at the end of the day Rachel tried to keep everyone around her happy, just like Max tried to do with her powers except Rachel used lies to do it. She was greedy and selfish, no disagreement to that, but she also tried to be selfless for most of her life. She was her own enemy and she demonized herself for it. And that got her murdered, thrown and buried away like the used rag doll she treated herself to be.

She was Chloe’s angel and Chloe was hers, but she was also her own demon. And there’s only so much two broken angels can do against a demon.

**TL;DR:** Idealizing her to be the Perfect Girl was what made her want to run away. Her family was what broke her. Desperation for escape was what killed her. Her family just *really* suck.

Now, I’m not trying to justify Rachel’s actions but merely rationalizing her character. I acknowledge that she was capable of being a shitty person at times, but just as Chloe had her issues, so did she, and so I choose to see them both for what they tried to be. Good hearted people just trying to make their shitty life a little easier. At the end of the day, Rachel Amber was a deeply flawed, insecure and emotionally damaged girl that pretended like nothing was wrong to forget about her troubles for a little, and was just dealt a bad hand in life. Literally.

After writing all of this, I realize that holy shit this girl was fucking complicated and a single post doesn’t do her justice nor explains her character properly enough. I thought it’d be simple enough to word it out, but then again, someone who was basically a junkie yet still managed to maintain her perfect reputation amongst her peers and the faculty is bound to be this complexed. Also as you can see I got very lazy at the middle of the elaborations and repetition has probably made this unnecessarily long but thank you for reading and finishing this overall confusing and messy essay.

#life is strange #amberprice #chloeprice #rachelamber #analysis #meta #I posted this on Reddit n it got a nice reception #so here it is on tumblr #yk just to stay true to what this blog was supposed to b lmao

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wouldnt-it-be-hilarious-if-i · 3 years ago

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5:42 am

*TW: discussion of antisemitism

currently listening to: smack a bitch by rico nasty

i woke up sweating like a damn pig because my fan broke a few weeks ago (it's so freaking hot) and because i had a dream about someone i know. i feel like my consciousness only caught the tail end of it, but it was enough to make me paranoid that i texted them in my sleep lol

anyway, i'm up now so whatever. i was thinking about fundamentalist christians before i fell asleep, and idk if it's just because of how much of a genuine pet peeve of mine antisemitism is. also pet peeve is a very, very bad word for what i mean but it's the best i've got. as someone who comes from a german family, i simply have no patience for it.

anyway, idk if it's be of how much of a genuine pet peeve of mine antisemitism is, or just because fundies tend to gravitate toward really pissing me off, but i cannot stand this time of year for one reason: christians who celebrate passover.

let me explain

so i have a huge hyperfixation on fundies, and i read about them a lot and follow them often because they just fascinate me. i "follow" this one family on social media (air quotes bc i mostly just look up their account, not follow) and the mom is like genuinely in need of help. also im not doxing her, she literally had thousands of followers and her following grows daily.

last year was her first year celebrating passover, and the fundie snark reddit forum was seething bc of the way she was behaving.

first of all, she said in her instagram post that there was "no right way to celebrate passover," and that there was "no book telling you how to do it." which, like, there LITERALLY is. it's called the haggadah. not that fucking hard to google. but i digress, this woman shouldn't even be allowed on the fucking internet she needs literal fucking help

then, she had the nerve to celebrate it POTLUCK style. like with a whole bunch of people from her home church, serving fucking lays potato chips and shit like this. literally nothing she served was kosher in any way

OH, OH, and she literally made the WHOLE thing about jesus

she said that passover is celebrating jesus as the sacrificial lamb

i just-

i literally added this entire fucking egregious display of 1). clear appropriation of a sacred jewish holiday and 2). stupidity to my 35 page google doc on things that make me actively lose faith in the jesus fandom (i grew up christian and still tenuously consider myself christian---i was catholic). i'm literally not joking. i have a very organized google doc of things that i think the church really needs to fucking address bc i'm so tired of christians doing shit like this

anyway, so the reason i'm talking about it all this year is because she's celebrating it again this year (as a lot of fundies are in place of easter since easter is a "pagan" holiday and these people want nothing to do with paganism. the passover seder is in the bible and this family only celebrates biblical feasts) and she made a post recently that just

why

here are a few of my personal 'favorite' quotes (when i say favorite, i mean i fucking hate everything about it, just to be clear):

"every year, jews condemn us for celebrating passover. they say it is 'their' holiday and 'christians' are taking it from them." bc it IS theirs, and you ARE actively participating in appropriating it. full stop.

"i don't understand this mindset. is the bible not for all people? are we not all created by god?" i-

"this command was for the israelites to pass down from generation to generation to remember how Yahuah delivered and saved them from egypt. it is to tell their children about the goodness of god. yet it also says that if a foreigner is living among them that they must celebrate as well. so if we are simply only following the old testament, as they do, it is still acceptable for 'foreigners' to choose to celebrate the holidays of god."

it gets worse

"we celebrate it today as christians with even greater meaning though. christ is our passover lamb. and our celebrations will not be intermingled with jewish traditions and customs but rather simple biblical intruction. and jesus said that there is no longer jew or gentile, male or female. we are all children of god (those that call upon the lord and trust christ as our savior) unified by christ."

words can't not express how angry this woman makes me

AND THE FACT THAT HER FOLLOWERS ON IG EAT THIS SHIT UPPPPPPPPPPP

let me just go ahead and make this clear as fucking day: these bastardized versions of Passover are inherently antisemitic. literally all you have to do is know how to fucking read to see that everything about her reasoning is disgusting, hateful, and violent. she literally just said that Jews aren't even supposed to exist because Jesus said that everyone is unified by Christ, so everyone is supposed to be christian. and then she spent a good chunk of the post complaining about being rejected by people for celebrating Passover

UM MAYBE BECAUSE YOU'RE BEING AN ENTIRE FUCKING CUNT ABOUT IT?

Jewish people are real people. They have real, honest, sacred traditions that have MEANING both historically and religiously. They are not playing pretend, they are not out to reject christian beliefs, they are not doing any of the nasty shit you think they are because of your nasty antisemetic beliefs about how jewish people behave and feel. They're literally honoring their religious beliefs, and begging you to just not do what you're doing. It's not that fucking hard to just respect other people.

At this point, i really really understand gatekeeping. i hope the people rejecting you spit on your nasty, unwashed, three-day eyeliner wearing, greasy once a month washed haired, drop-shipped boutique 'Alexa, homeschool the kids' t-shirt wearing bitch ass self. i literally hope that jesus himself looks at you after you die and goes, "no fucking way am i letting you in. are you fucking serious? what the hell was that?" i'm just so angry--like what the fuck is wrong with you? you are the furthest fucking thing from christ-like, i'll tell you that. you are a narcissitic bitch who knows DAMN FUCKING WELL that you are appropriating a fucking sacred event, and i know that because you've deleted every comment made by a jewish person on your stupid little "we love you more" t-shirt post about being rejected by others for this. it's not our holiday. it's not your holiday. you are a violent, nasty, godless piece of shit who will fight long and hard for a holiday that DOES NOT FUCKING BELONG TO YOU but won't take your fucking children to the doctor when they have broken fucking bones unless it's bothering you in some way, and even then you just fucking pray over them and pretend they're healed after.

FIND HELP.

If you want to experience a real passover seder, literally just do the work and find a jewish community willing to invite you (good fucking luck after this fucking mess tho, at this point just look it up on youtube honestly bc if i were jewish i wouldn't let you near my community with a 500 ft pole), and experience it not just correctly but respectfully. like are you fucking serious? you really want to sit there and fucking pretend that jesus would have WANTED that? that's literally hilarious of you to think considering 1). jesus was a jew himself 2). he literally flipped tables and shit when he saw the church fucking using sacred grounds for gambling and consumerism, you don't think he's going to be flipping tables at your little potluck when he sees you doing essentially the same thing to another group of people? jesus espoused love, and this is literally the exact opposite of that.

this literally infuriates me so much. and i hate that this woman and others like her are teaching their beautiful kids that this is okay, and acting like jewish communities who are hurt by this clear act of violence against their religion ARE JUST LIKE OVERREACTING OR SOMETHING? oh my god, it's on sight if i ever fucking catch some bullshit like this coming out of someone's mouth. i'm not joking. i'll lose it.

if you don't like easter, literally just say that and eat your bland boiled food, ok? go and pray or something and call it a day. but don't steal something that isn't yours, act like it is, and then get upset when everyone is like hey that's pretty fucked up of you, maybe don't do that?

anyway, if anyone ever wants to read my google doc on things that make me lose faith in Christianity lmk lol

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johannas-motivational-insults · 6 years ago

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Adora, Catra, and Loci of Control

Okay, let’s talk psychology here, specifically loci of control. The concept of locus of control is defined as the degree to which people believe that they have control over the outcome of events in their lives, as opposed to external forces beyond their control. This is one of the ways in which Adora and Catra are diametrically opposed.

Adora has an extreme internal locus of control and Catra has an extreme external locus of control. That is, Adora believes she can control events and outcomes in her life (or that she should be able to, at least), and therefore she believes she deserves all the good and bad things that happen to her (and the world). Meanwhile, Catra believes she has no control over the events and outcomes in her life, and therefore she believes she doesn’t deserve the good or bad things that happen to her. They just happen, no matter what she does.

While an internal locus of control is generally considered more healthy, the extreme to which Adora tries to assume control of everything and take the blame for every failure is not healthy. We see this as a recurring theme in Plumeria, at the Battle of Bright Moon, and in the strategy tent at the pass. Adora constantly takes on responsibility for everything, believing one misstep or failure on her part will lead to disaster for the entire planet. She also carries a lot of guilt for the way Catra has spiralled since her departure from the Horde, despite not understanding why it upset Catra and why she refused to leave with her. Since Catra’s spiral has caused so many issues for the Princess Aliiance, this has compounded into a huge guilt complex.

Not only does Adora’s extreme internal locus of control cause her massive amounts of guilt, it messes with her view of the world. When Light Hope tells her she has no choice, that being She-Ra is her destiny, it’s earth-shattering for her because she’s used to having the illusion of self-determination. Shadow Weaver manipulated her into wanting to be powerful so she could exert influence through her. Basically, this kind of thing could only upset someone who believes they have a choice in the first place. Having to grapple with the idea that there are things she can’t control was very difficult for Adora - and in a sense, that was her biggest development in season 3. Her finally standing up for herself and saying that the world ending was not her fault and Catra’s actions are not her responsibility was a huge fucking deal.

Adora was raised to believe that she was responsible for Catra and everyone else in her sphere of influence, that if she couldn’t control people and situations there would be dire consequences. She could only begin to move forward once she accepted that she isn’t in control of what other people do, only what she herself does.

Now, as for Catra, it’s important to note that people who have external loci of control usually think this way because that is what they have experienced. It has been proven, for instance, that children from abusive home situations are more likely to have external loci of control, which relates perfectly to Catra. Additionally, while Shadow Weaver obviously abused her, it appears that how badly she treated her was not consistent, that it was dependent on external forces such as Shadow Weaver’s mood and whether or not Adora was present. That is, what happened to Catra was not strongly correlated with how she behaved. That further explains why she believes her actions have no effect on the outcomes in her life.

With all this in mind, it’s understandable why Catra blames all the bad things that happen to her on other people. The problem is that now that she’s in a position where she actually has some agency, she hasn’t been able to adjust her mindset accordingly. She has power now and boy does she love it, but she doesn’t believe herself responsible for her own choices because, in her mind, it’s not her fault she ended up in this situation.

Catra made some very powerful remarks in season 3 about the audacity of Shadow Weaver to play the good guy after everything she put her through, after she predisposed Catra to going down this villainous, spiteful path. And this was actually a very good point, but there’s an implication there that Catra did not choose to go down this path. But she did. Leaving her abusive situation and evil faction when it was all she knew would have been a difficult choice, but not leaving and in fact actively participating in the evils of the Horde was also a choice. She doesn’t seem to comprehend that.

Despite seeming to think herself incapable of it, Catra longs for self-determination, so much so that she was willing to destroy the world and herself with it as a final fuck you to a life that never let her have a say in anything. She chose to pull that lever not only to triumph over Adora, but because it was a choice she could make for herself that others were trying to hold her back from. Interestingly, even after Catra made that choice she continued to blame Adora for it, and for her descent into villainy in general. She can’t take responsibility for her own choices because she doesn’t believe she ever really had a choice, about anything.

Catra was raised to believe that she was weak and dependant on Adora, that her feelings and actions had no worth or value, and that she had no say in what happened to her. She will only begin to move forward once she accepts that her actions are her own, have meaning, and have real effects on others.

As you can see, it is critical for both of them to come to understand that they are responsible for their own actions and their own actions only. Shadow Weaver really did a number on them, fostering this imbalanced relationship in hopes of controlling them and turning them against each other.

...wouldn’t the best revenge on Shadow Weaver be for them to take her down together, resisting her attempts at manipulation and trusting in each other? Just saying.

#spop #she-ra #she ra #catradora #meta #catra and shadow weaver #adora and shadow weaver #adora #catra #locus of control #personality psychology #child abuse #gifs

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dream-wrecker-blog · 4 years ago

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bREak up’S aRen’t only ROMAntic

Today.... I stopped thinking as an individual. I selflessly put my needs to the side and I thought of another. My sister. Now! before you start to think that how Could I categorize that as selfless, it’s normal to do that!. Please keep in mind that not all people! not all... Organic family structures are the same. My sister and I are recently getting a long.

And I have to say that in a very loose. Like stretched out taffy loose way. Because I still don't think that we get a long very well. But! there's a mutual respect among us. Our relationship has been strained due to how we were raised.

I recently went though a break up. I broke up with my mother. You see. She, herself, is one of the many people who have been effected by the life of Black Harlem. In the era of the 70′s and early 80′s. Raised by a broken mother as well. A mother who never received help, Mentally,emotionally and in my personal opinion spiritually too. With this information. I just went over three generations. Myself. my mother and my mothers mother (aka) grandmother. All three people, including myself are people who in many way are emotionally voided, depleted. And in great need of great affection, validation and attention from our nuclear family units.

My grandmother is a very strong woman. (Lets call her Elsie) And! it’s not because she wants to be. My great Grandmother (Lets call her Barbra ) was not a very strong woman. She was a woman succumbed by her circumstance. To me that’s all fine and dandy.,,,, Why?,,,, you say?... Well..... Giving that (Barbra) was born and raised in North Carolina in the 1930‘s I have to say. She’d been though enough.

The way that I was able to get a good idea of what life was like back then (Elsie) are through movies. Such as ”What’s love got to do with it. “ Starring (Angela Bassett) or “The Help.” Staring (Viola Davis & Emma stone) and these movies takes place in the 60′s and 70′s. Now! For my great GRANDMOTHER! (Barbra) I believe She did the best that she could with what she knew how. She was not a scholar or a highly educated woman. But! she was loving, tolerant & mildly strong. But! that’s always been the case when it comes to women of color. They’re strong!

In these long drawn out rants I’m trying to paint you some details on how I have become the way that I have. By giving you the (reader) a clear understanding of my family history, I can avoid you guys thinking I’m a complete asshole. I swear, I’m just half of one! My great grandmother, as far as I know was a maid. and she’d done that for some time. Now! the kicker here is that I’m getting all of this second hand. Not from the horses mouth herself. When I was young. like say..... 10 or even 11 she must have been in her mid 50′s. I knew not what to ask. I also was not it he mindset like I m now to ask her.

When I became much older and more inquisitive about why people were behaving the way that they were in my family. Secrets begun to spill! ...Ahhh that's a lie, more like sprinkle! Yes Sprinkle!!! Over the years I would get little pieces here and there that would not add up until I had done my own psychology study. Started to plug two and two together to make 22!!!! My grand mother married or at least had relations with a man who was very wealthy. As far as I know. They birth one child together. My grandmother (Elsie) And choose to not stay around for too long.

Here’s where the discord, resentment and self loathing comes into the family tree. My supposed great grandfather had ambition that out weighed what my great grandmother could even fathom. He asked her what her goals were. What she wanted in life. He asked her if she wanted to have the full American dream. A house and home full of children. As I try my best to understand. Where she’s from. Where her people before her may have come from. Ultra humble beginnings. Her understanding of life. to see why she had mad the choice she had! The twist to this is that My supposed great grandfather was rich.And an Indigenous man. And my grandmother is half African American and half indigenous as well. Two cultures. two huge differences.

From what I understand is that Native American or Indigenous people like to stick with there own. And so does Black women today too. .. Supposedly.. This was a time where people (from my understanding) were not about Racially or ethnically mixing. Despite the fact Barbra is mixed herself. With these pivotal details. He left my grandmother because He felt she was okay with a plate of food and watching TV. I know there has to be more to her story. I wish I had found out sooner. Now! I may have to call her spirit to find out more. And interpretation can get a little messy.

With all of these colors that painting this family portrait. Barbra had moved on in her life and actually married another man (I can confirms this.) A man who added to the brew of sorrow. I wont give you his last name. But his first name was James. And boy he was a sorry mother fucker. He was an abusive husband and a rapist. As well as a child predator. He would beat on Barbra and rape Elsie, until she had enough and fought back. I also know for a fact that he raped my great uncles and aunts too. All the women in the ranks of great aunts. Don’t allow men to do certain things, even jokingly. They were very, very, over protective of us the children. Even from the males in our family.

From the trauma my grand received from 13 and up. She had become a cold woman. At least to me, this is what I saw. As a child I was nervous to be around her. Her face, although it showed emotion. It never seemed to shine with light. The blank looks in her eyes. And female baritones of her voice. If you need a sad but accurate portrait of how she looks and an even better on in how she behaves. Just watch the actress “Monique“ in the movie (Precious.) I don't like to bad mouth anyone (who’s family) or make myself seem like “Oh! poor me! But these are just the facts of my life. When I watched the movie “Precious” I could not think of anyone else.

Yes, the movie does feel like how my mother had been raised.My grand had five children all together. And my mother is the eldest. A torch I bare myself. now! As far as the horses mouth! I fed this one myself. I had been cornered by Elsie one day at one of my baby cousins birthday party's. I guess the guilt was ridding her. It was very unexpected. However.... I do have to say, I did pray to “Ochun“ that week. I forgot what for! But! I will give where credit is due. Ochun had given me the clarity I needed to heal from this generational curse.

My grand had come over and literally corned me. She pulls me to the side and begins to sorrow vomit all over me. I was so confused and then I begun to be very sad. You see. I have always heard stories of how my grandmother would beat the kids and how she was extra as fuck. But! when your a teenager and you haven't been through stuff like. What they’re describing. You can only start to think that these are some hate’n ass bitches. Until you hear it straight from the source herself. She proceeds to tell me how. She ain’t shit, wasn't shit and how she don't wanna be a piece of shit anymore!

Standing there, hearing all of those shitty things she had done to my mother and her siblings made me really fucking down. At the moment I was like why the fuck is she telling me all of this. That moment I take it in strides of what that could have meant. Or what it is. depending on my mood and what I’m feeling the meaning changes. I think, at times I was a proxy for her. Since her and my own mother do not speak at all. Other times I look at it as the family history I need to know. In order to know whats happening for the future. The details are how we are. How we have gotten to this place in our family. It’s terrible that the details are sucky. But they’re important.

My mother! Man this woman is a vault of locked secrets. Unfortunately I cant say that about her legs. Any time my mother gets around her type of man. I can mentally see her oozing honey from her Venus fly trap. Legs, springing wide open. Eyes hypnotizing her unknowing victim. (lol) As vivid as that sounds my moms not a slut! I swear!. My mother is an educated woman. A woman who is about her house and home and herself. and always herself. And herself and herself.

Despite being raised by a trauma ridden mother. My mother to me was always dramatic. And has always responded to me as If I was the one who caused her situation to be worse than, what SHE mad it out to be. I should stop writing her as my mother and write her as egg downer. I’m in my feelings.

It’s abundantly clear to me that she never wanted children. Her actions speak louder than her words. However when you tell a narcissist that you would do something for them that's not about them. They tend to make it more about them, When it actually isn't. And get mad about it! (for better context) My mother hid me from my father until I was five years old. That is until the whistle blower. Barbra, spilled the beans to my fathers side of the family. And told them that there’s a new baby in our family and I believe that he is yours too. I tried asking these questions and I get the same reply all the time. It was a challenging time for me. (But! I have questions I have the right to be answered.)

My aunt on my fathers side, told me that she had offered to adopt me if my mother wanted to continue to live her life. I don’t think that the offer was out of spite or malice. I do believe that she had and still has all of the best intentions for me then and even now. Albeit, that’s how the cookie crumbled

I know She has a lot of trauma. I know she needs psychological help . Or accept it and then whoosah that out! But! that’s something I cant help her with. Therapy is only for those who seek help. Who actually want it. For most of my child hood I felt Like I was an adult. Always carefully making decisions. Doing stuff that would give me anxiety. Or having very adult conversations about shit I should not be in. Over all I’m an adult now. With a little bit more sound mind. I’m no longer a child and burdened with the thoughts of how can I deal with this now.

She abandoned me when I was 16. Barley even spoke to me in my 20′s and now in my 30′s. Fully stable and having an amazing career. you wanna start talking to me. You wanna be more active in my life. Be the more motherly. Gurl... bye!!!! I feel the relationship between us is too strained.

For the sake of honestly and for the sake of me telling you all about my family and its truth. I have tried with her. I allowed her to be in my life. and without skipping a beat she acts as if nothing between us has never occurred. For some people that's cool and okay. For me, I just put up Berlin Walls and barbwire for boundaries. because actions are habitual. At first people try. They may even change. But! When complacency hits! They go back into the same habits. I say this Because that Is what happened. She wanted me to do more for her than she she was willing to do for me. She continuously invalidate what I want. My beliefs and my actions. So, I told her that I can not continue having her in my life. She does not see where she has gone wrong but that is a decision she has made. She’s selfish!

In her selfishness. we had to learn how to deal with her on a day to day basis. Which is why I say “ I too: have issues as well. But! I will not let them pass on to my children.” I mean, I’m the only one who can! My sister cut out her testicles. I mean what the fuck. Now the burden of having children falls on to my shoulders. Besides children, being an Issue. I have to say that my sister in personality is very much like my mother. I’ve also put her on the back burner. She is the pot of beans I put on the stove. But have not turned on. Her energy and personality is too dam extra at times when I’m trying to chill & be breezy.

Well. recently that hot tempered extra person. Done and went down and simmered. Which for me, is not normal at all. I’d rather seem my sister annoyed than sad. Because I don't know what she would do if she’s too sad. That scares me! I have no clue what to do if she was too, too sad. This simmering pot of water I need her to be at a boil. But! she would not allow me to know what’s going on with her. Until It was a bit much for her to hold in. This year alone three of her friends/ associates has died. And one of her really good cis female friends had gotten into a very rough car crash where her face and the steering wheel were basically one. Not to mention she he self is living a life that most deem problematic.

To be continued...

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marinerofthestars · 5 years ago

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the zodai tag

bit of a late arrival to this fandom, but better late than never, i suppose!

1. How did you hear about the books? about a year ago, i was doing research on the zodiac for an urban fantasy project i’m working on, tales from omphalos, when i found the house ophiuchus info page on the zodiac website. unfortunately life got in the way and i forgot the series for a while, but a little while ago i remembered zodiac’s worldbuilding and got sucked right back in!

2. What is your favorite moment from the series so far? it’s hard to choose just one moment, but i’d have to say skarlet and rho’s first meeting in black moon for how atypical it is. we know skarlet is the hypotenuse in rho and hysan’s love triangle, but she doesn’t act like the stereotypical petty Other Woman at all. she’s charismatic, she’s genuinely fun to be around, and she has sympathetic motives and ambitions. above all, she’s actually super nice towards rho, and doesn’t let her feelings get in the way of their political collaboration. (and then thirteen rising assassinated her character. yes i am still bitter about it why do you ask)

3. Which House are you from? house leo!

4. What do you like about your House? artistry pride is something i’d really love to be a part of as an aspiring author, i have blaze and trax (both criminally underrated characters imo) as my housemates, and our zodai wield FLAMING SWORDS in battle. what’s not to love?

5. If you had to change Houses, which House would you pick? since leo really vibes with my passion for art, this is definitely a tricky question! probably either libra (police brutality is a thing of the past with bind, and their government seems like they have their act together), scorpio (much waterworld. much ambition. much cool tech. wow), or sagittarius (diversity, democracies where the voices of the young and non-complacent can be heard, and really vibrant cities are all things i appreciate)

6. Which system would you most like to visit? capricorn, no question. the zodiax is THE single most location in the entire zodiac bar none to me - an ancient complex the size of a planet, its oldest curators having access to transportation systems most inhabitants don’t even know about? an archive of humanity’s collective knowledge, so massive it has hotels and restaurants within it because leaving to sleep or eat is just so impractical? LET ME TOUR IT. LET ME UNCOVER ITS MYSTERIES I KNOW THEY EXIST (i think history is rad okay)

7. If you got to choose, which Zodiac technology would you like to have? probably...the tattoo? i don’t have anywhere enough knowledge about neuroscience/engineering to design my own, but assuming that i did, i’d love to design a tattoo that can interface with my brain and with digital art software, so that i can turn whatever ideas i have in my head into artwork!

8. Which character would you want as a best friend? skarlet. she’s six feet tall, buff as all hell, super attractive, prefers diplomacy to violence but still perfectly capable of kicking ass, and an outspoken risers’ rights activist. what’s not to love? (though knowing the type of people i usually hang out with, i’d probably end up with like. twain or gyzer as my best friend. one can dream though)

9. Which sign would you like to date? aries, because as previously stated skarlet is awesome. (a sentiment i will continue to reiterate) failing that, either libra for their sense of justice, scorpio for their ambition and passion, or aquarius for their innovative mindset.

10. Who do you hope Rho “ends up with?” (If anyone at all!) firstly, thank you for acknowledging that rho might not be interested in romance after everything she’s been through. (aromantic rho? arho?) secondly: skarlet.

this might be a little controversial, but i feel like in some regards, rho has far more chemistry with skarlet than she has with hysan. (ms. russell. i am sorry but. i have. Issues. with ‘centaur smile’ and the context surrounding it doesn’t make it any better) all of their interactions are marked by a noted admiration on rho’s part, and it’s not just merely admiration of her frankly enviable body (there’s more than enough of that, but it feels respectful somehow, there’s no five-page purple prosey ramblings on how the sweat glints on skar’s brow as she lifts weights, unlike with some people - sorry, mathias), but admiration of skar’s personality.

her charisma. her ambitions. her drive to fight for people who’ve been beaten down for millennia, to give a voice to the voiceless. to use violence as a last resort, not a first strike.

even at their absolute worst in thirteen rising, even when they’re butting heads, they don’t let it get in the way of doing what needs to be done. hell, skarlet even points out that she wouldn’t be giving rho such a hard time if she didn’t respect the hell out of rho, if she didn’t think she was tough enough to take it. there’s a sort of unspoken bond between them, a slow orbit that they’re both caught in. at the end of the series, they part way on relatively good terms, and with the hope that maybe, just maybe, that orbit might become something more than just professional acquaintance.

also their oppositional dichotomy of cardinal fire/water signs is an awesome aesthetic that i really wish was brought up more than it was in canon :(

11. If you could record a Snow Globe, what would you put in it? only A snow globe? you’re not exactly giving me a lot of slack here in all seriousness, if i had to choose one moment to record in a snow globe, probably the moment i first came up with the idea for the urban fantasy project i mentioned above, tales from omphalos. i’ve never been devoted as much time to or invested as much energy in a project as i have with tfo, and i’d like to keep an easily accessible record of my original vision on hand. and hey, if by some chance i manage to follow in romina’s footsteps, get tales from omphalos professionally published, have it become a big success with a respectable fandom, i’d like to look back every once in a while, and remember how it all began.

12. If you had the chance to tell Rho anything, what advice/encouragement would you give her? - lies, especially lies of omission, are necessary a lot of the time to get ahead in politics and life in general use that being ahead to help out the people and groups you care about - don't trust the immortal child-aristocrats or expect them to behave in a way that won't inevitably screw you over - if you must play nice with them, figure out how to decrease gemini’s horrific income inequality, and see what you can do about exporting cell rejuvenation therapy to the wider zodiac - ferez is right, risers are the future and you need to acknowledge that going forward - skarlet is excellent at garnering support and bridging generational gaps, and while fernanda purecell is a bougie running dog, she’s got her head screwed on the right way regarding politics and institutional riserphobia; together, the three of you should be able to make some headway towards making amends for past wrongs - i don’t care if family heads have suffrage, matriarchal aristocracy (aristocratic matriarchy?) is NOT a democracy or a form of government that looks out for the rights of men/NB people/agender people/multigender people/intersex people/you get the idea - romance is by no means an exclusively two-player game, and skarlet has said she would be open to an arrangement; however, if you MUST insist on ignoring that polyamory is a thing, go for the six-foot risers' rights activist - i’m sorry about all the bullshit with your mom. whatever the end result was, whatever her intentions, it does not excuse the way she treated you and your dad and stanton. it’s okay to feel like shit because of what she did to you, and not being able to wall it off doesn’t make you weak or anything dumb like that - you’re already far stronger than she ever was. i know how much it sucks - i was in the same situation as you once - but believe me when i say that things do get better. you’re not alone here, rho. - please you gotta fight the gender binary you live in the FUTURE you gotta do it you gotta-

BONUS QUESTION 13. How would you react if your friend became a Riser? let them know that I love and support them no matter what their house, that being the way that they are is totally valid, and that anyone who says otherwise will have to answer to my fist in their face. if they’re unbalanced, make sure they have access to any resources they need (possibly including memory recap vlogs, definitely including medication and therapy to help out with any health issues they may develop).

#zodiac #zodiac books #wandering star #black moon #thirteen rising #romina russell #romina garber #the zodai tag #skarho #rhoses and thornes #look i stan skarlet okay

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alphaofdarkness · 4 years ago

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I wish to know more of your awesome OCs!! So, 19, 22(or maybe as an alternative if they don't, something you mischaracterize on some of them by mistake? Odd, but I sometimes mess up my own ocs XD), 23, 24, 26, and 32 for the OC questions!!

Oh! You beautiful person you! 💖🥺 Of course I shall tell you more about my many, many ocs! Hopefully I can fulfill! 🥰🤗

More undercut because this turned out to be very long ~ 😅

19. Introduce an OC that means a lot to you (and explain why).

Aw, honestly all my OC’s mean so much to me! It is hard to play favorites sometimes lol. Though, if I had to choose, I’m going with two of them!

Samantha, or Sam, is definitely my baby and has definitely developed so much from her original self. Nonetheless, still the same shy, curious girl who has a big role to uphold as chosen Beta to her Alpha. Plus, being a Legendary Wolf Warrior of Light, even more so! Still, despite many the many hardships and obstacles she has faced, she is still hopeful and a total sweetheart. She just wants a settled life and live her with her closest pack mates.

I have definitely put her though the ringer a lot, emotionally and even explored just several internal things with her. I know Danielle is meant to be me in a sense, but personality and emotional wise, I am more like this lovely Angel. Best girl and everyone loves her!

Second is definitely Danielle (my BsD self insert). Personally, because I have started to embrace her and give her more of my personality and who I really am. Still keeping her as her own person with her struggles, in some aspects, but giving her more of me as well. She has definitely allowed me to have some more self love for myself. Even if it is come and go on most days. She has just grown to be more of a gradual part of me in the recent years since I got into Bsd. I truly love her as she gives me a reason to embrace the parts of me I never would have considered so much or even just not like about me.

Self shipping has definitely also helped, I just love Dany very much and hold her close, please she may be stubborn but she is hella fragile ;;;w;;;

22. Is there any OC of yours people tend to mischaracterize? If yes, how?

Hm, I wouldn't say anyone has mischaracterized my characters so much that I know of, maybe my parents whenever there is a moment they see my Oc’s and just make a judgement on them on the spot lol.

I suppose me mischaracterizing my OCs would probably be the Seven Deadly Soul Sins? Maybe ^^, These seven, practically, ghost entities of the Seven Deadly Sins are meant to be perceived as the worst possible people/wolves. Their existence is the reason people do bad things and are the negative contrast to the Legendary Wolf Warriors.

Take an old, unfinished draw of all 7 of them together~

I know what they are, how they behave, what their very existence and presence entails. However, I have come to the bad tendency of redemption in my line of story telling, I often find myself back and forth whether there is any redeemable qualities that should be given to them considering their very existence and such. Envy, or Evelyn, is one that I can definitely see having something on that accord, but she is still at her core bad.

I don't know if I am saying this correctly or even answering the question well lol. But yeah, I say my Deadly Sin OC’s often can be mischaracterized in a way. I can definitely picture them being top favs if my story was an actual thing. I support the fans in all they come lol ^^

23. Introduce OC that has changed from your first idea concerning what the character would be like?

I can't think of one I changed too much out of concern for what they are like that I can remember to be quite honest ^^,

I guess maybe Wisler? I know when I first came up with the start up concept of the LWW, I never intended for him to be a previous Warrior. It was always meant to be Dany’s Aunt who possessed it and Wisler was just a precautious elder wolf who needed to teach her to better her powers, less she gives it up like his daughter had.

Of course, the whole concept and idea, just gives way for him to have been a possible warrior in the past. If anything I just the developed the idea more and made it more of a tragedy for Wisler. Normally, the concept of being a LWW is meant to be a blessing, a gift bestowed by a greater power, but to him, after giving up his power and remaining upon the world, he just sees it as a curse. Pride only solidified that into his mind. Nonetheless, he becomes a mentor to the other warriors to better themselves and keep them from giving up their power.

Second, was more of a momentary interest in the Chronicles of Narnia and being ever so salty about Susan being left behind, while her family died and went to Narnia ;;;w;;;

Silly thing really, but literally chose, out of all the warriors, Lidia to be the one to be left alive, from whatever scenario I had at the time, because she refused her soul gift of the LWW’s. It was a momentary silly concept, I don't know why I would chose her for this scenario at all, she doesn’t deserve that ;;w;;

If anything, the ones that I can picture are Yamato and Danielle, just because of their mental state and emotional turmoil under such a heavy weight of loss. It was a silly concept I had thought of once, and just cry little at the thought ;;w;;

24. If you could meet one OC of yours, who would it be and why?

Heck, I would love to meet all of them... and heavy apologize for all the hell I've put them all through ;;;w;;;

But Jason~ most definitely...Not cause I self ship myself with him or anything but UwU,,, He is a sweetheart and a beautiful boi ~ I want to love him and give him a soft life pls.

26. Have you ever had to change your OC’s design or something else about them against your will?

Ahh,,, All of them, in a way? ^^; my middle self was something else entirely~

I think design wise, most if not all my warriors, are still the same. Maybe just a few new upgrades in their fur shade, colored eyes, and maybe their human designs too. Most definitely will change more in the future, just for the sake of bettering myself to draw people.

Old, high school art~ Cringe

Any new design change is purely out of being in a more better mindset of design and just development of what make them unique. I have definitely changed all of their Soul Markings, I have changed Lidia’s name from Leafia recently, Taka’s formerly sky blue eyes to more of a pale green, Sora’s former tail scar to the claw ones on her shoulder, etc.

Origin, personality and relation wise on the other hand, GRADUAL SHIFT! Some points:

Sora, Yamato, and Takaru are heavily inspired by the Digimon Adventure kids of the same name, I kept their surnames of the ones from the series for a long time into at most Junior Year of High School. Til I learned, if I want to make them my own, I have to change this entirely!

So Sora, Yamato, and Takaru are definitely different entirely from their original selves, personality and kind of design wise.

Sam was kind of meant to be like Kari from Digimon in a way, but heavily refused to name her that or make her in similarity of the character.

Another Oc of mine named Jacob Wolfe was originally going to be the Warrior of Earth before I came up with Lidia.

There was originally meant to be just 5 Warriors, Lidia and Jason not yet part of it and, surprisingly, neither was Danielle.

Jason was originally named Damien and was kind of, for a while, Danielle’s twin sibling... Changed that drastically and entirely after renaming him to Jason.

Originally, had some other mythical beasts living amongst them in the Forest of Dreams, like dragons and gryphons for a while.

Originally, played with the idea of the warriors coming back to life if they didn't give up their powers, but... after much though it just became more of a “too cheesy of choice?” Especially for an ending thing before the next generation kids come in, it was just not an option after a while.

These are just some that I can think of at the top of my head at least, I am sure there is much more scrap things in my mind lol.

32. Which one of your OCs would be the most suitable horror game protagonist and why?

...God I don't want any of them to fecking die grueso-(I should shut my mouth actually),,, even though I will admit I did internally put my warriors into a shitty thought-out idea of them in a Final Destination scenario...

Ahh, may Yamato in a way as that stoic, hardened protagonist with the will too try and survive, Wrath is his counter self sin, I find that fitting in a way. Same with Jason, just because of his slight nativity to being a warrior and how he left his former abusive living from his alpha and stepfather. Oddly enough, maybe Sam? Just because of her ability to see the worst things to happen in the future, but I am not sure lol.

Am thinking of the new Resident Evil game I see floating around with some gamer youtubers and I can see Yamato and/or Jason in the position and setting.

—✨——✨——✨—

I truly enjoyed all these questions! It gave me time to think and reflect on my ocs! I do hope you enjoy some old, blurred and unfinished art from ya wolf girl~ I truly appreciate this and gives me the feels of validation! ;;;w;;;

#the legendary wolf warriors #alpha’s art #alpha howls #oc ask questions!#bsd oc #original character #alpha's ocs

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schoolblogroxanne · 5 years ago

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How can I create a non-pathological culture, while embracing deviancy and tradition at the same time?

In order to make a non-pathological culture you need to know what a non-pathological culture is a Non-pathological culture does not focus on the leader's personal interests and resources. The information is not processed in a way to further or advance particular parties within the organization but to benefit the organization as a whole; this culture may seem abnormal but can be a beneficial way for the community. In order for it to work you need to know how to act in the deviance in the society; to balance the scale in the society, the wants and needs of the society and if these things are essential, for example, if the law of the government that is in power does not coincide with the needs and wants of the society, the society will feel alienated from nation it serves, it will break the balance and cause chaos, just like what happened to the Philippines when it was occupied by other nations, a revolution occurred because the balance was lost when other nations applied there laws and tradition to the society, therefore a non-pathological culture can be doable due to its components and ways, not only the government or the people that are on power will benefit the but all of the people who are under this nation or society. Non-pathological culture is not power oriented and is a positive type culture.

Deviancy is classified in two types, Over conformity and Under conformity, Over conformity is based on accepting and conforming to norms without question where the actions, traits and ideas of athletes and coaches involves such an extreme conformity that they perform “supranormal” actions and potentially endanger themselves and others for example models, Some models suffer anorexia due to their obsession of having a thin body: Anorexia is form of eating disorder which the person having this psychological disorder fears to gain weight. Another example of deviant Over conformity is that an athlete makes sacrifices for "the game", an athlete strives for distinction, an athlete accepts risks and plays through pain, and an athlete accepts no limits in the pursuit of possibilities. Because of the presence of this moral code of athleticism, athletes who over-conform to theses norms and commit deviant acts aren't necessarily viewed as deviant. The four main norms of the sports ethic states that an athlete must make sacrifices for the game and accept risks, which can in turn, glorify the decisions that an athlete makes to behave in a deviant way. If an athlete decides they need to better their physical health in order to succeed in their sport, and decides to take performance enhancing drugs or along the way, develops an eating disorder in pursuit of becoming a larger asset to their team, according to the sports ethic, they are only fulfilling their duties as an athlete, some athletes also do Over training or staleness occurs when an athlete ignores the signs of overreaching and continues to train. Many athletes believe that weakness or poor performance signals the need for even harder training. So, they continue to push themselves. This only breaks down the body further pushing the body to its limit. This act of deviance Overconformity is mostly acceptable in the athlete society because other athletes will understand what that person feels and the reason why he did those deviant acts, even though there is bad side on this type of practices some of the characteristics of this deviancy has a positive effect because of their goal to be the best or the be known they motivate their body in order to reach those goals.

The other form of deviancy is Under conformity, under conformity is based on ignoring or rejecting norms, this often happen to people who has low esteem, those people who take their talent for granted and people who are under too much pressure. This type of deviance is a negative form of deviance, the complete opposite of deviance over conformity, this type of deviance can result to generalizations or stereotypes, people will consider you taboo, someone who is not acceptable to the society, because people are more used with the uniform ways, doing under conformity makes you different, strange , or much worse a bad influence to other people, some culture reject this kind of thinking because it may affect there laws and tradition, an example of under conformity is obesity, obesity is a complex disease involving excessive of body fat, a gateway disease that may cause other diseases and health problems, such as heart disease, diabetes, high blood pressure and some other certain cancer. Another example to this is an unmotivated student, a student that avoids academic challenges; the student shows boredom and lack of attention in class, in order to tend to this unmotivated student you need to do two things he first is to change his thinking so he comes to believe that, if he puts forth effort, he can be successful with academic tasks. The second is to figure out what does motivate them to identify the settings, situations, and conditions that he responds to and that can be used to foster his interest, so here we it the two types of deviance, deviance has its good side and its bad side, If we use deviance in a good way we could gain from it but we need to put balance on the decisions we make, because too much of anything is bad, other traits of having a deviant under conformity is that the person having this have sub normal ideas, traits, actions that indicate rejection or ignorance of their existence. This type of attitude could link into anarchy and lawlessness, this type of mindset can be dangerous to the people around him/her because he/she could harm them in order to get their wants and needs, and also this type of deviancy can cause the person to lose confidence to self and due to being unmotivated it can affect the people around them and in academic studies.

Tradition can also be preserved even though there is deviance, it can be preserved by Sharing your culture's art and technology. Each culture has its own clothing, music, visual art, storytelling traditions, and many more unique characteristics. Other members of your culture will be overjoyed to teach or talk about their hobbies, their jobs, their crafts, and what they do for fun. This includes traditional artwork you would find in a museum, but material culture goes far beyond that. Even a kitchen spoon or a piece of software is a cultural artifact. People with less sophisticated technology are often considered ignorant or less intelligent. This is completely wrong. Culture passes on tools adapted to a particular environment, and every tool has generations of thinking behind it. Shaping a stone tool is one of the oldest cultural practices there is, and it still takes great skill and knowledge. Cook family recipes. It's never too late to whip up some recipes from your grandmother's cookbook. Smell and taste have powerful connections to memory. As you knead dough or try to guess the right amount of spices, you might remember meals from you childhood or holidays. Just reading a recipe can teach you how much ingredients and kitchen tools have changed. And even if some of them are unfamiliar, others have most likely become your comfort food or a source of family pride, even though these are simple things it is very effective in preserving the traditions you grew up to have another way to preserve tradition is to Accept change. The dialogue around passing on culture often sounds defeatist. Cultures are "endangered" or need "preserving" before they die out. Real challenges and threats do exist, but don't assume that all change is bad. Culture helps people adapt to the world around them. The world has always been changing, cultures have always been adapting, and it's up to you to choose a direction you can be proud of. Almost everyone participates in more than one culture. Be proud of your blend of ideas and behaviors, Talk about it and share it with other people. People are often fascinated by the different ways that people do similar things. Start a conversation and help bring others into the fold, sharing your culture is a good way to connect with other people, therefore the society can still embrace deviance and traditions. Some individuals use technology as a means of deviating from more traditional cultural norms. For example, in the United States, employees in offices are encouraged to remain productive and efficient, letting their minds wander off-task as little as possible. In the past decade, most companies have installed high-speed internet access as a means of improving efficiency. However, employees often appropriate the internet access to avoid work by using social networking sites. Such procrastination and corporate inefficiency stemming from internet access is called “cyber loafing”, but even though employees cyber loaf it the installation of high speed internet connection has motivated the employees to work faster.

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bloodsworn-marshal · 6 years ago

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List of my AUs....

[[ Finally took the time to write out a bunch of nonsense AUs I’ve been mainly keeping to myself... very self-indulgent but fun ideas I liked to explore if only for the creativity out of it...! ]]

Bandit AU

Before the inevitable would come to be that his own parents would sell his life away, Pipin had instead chosen to run away from home a few days prior after coming upon the evidence that his biological father had prepared to do such. He thought his luck better in the wilds than to be forced into child labor. So it would be that he fled in the dead of night with what few rations and belongings he called his own, striking out a new life for himself… Out in the never ending sands of the desert. A new place he would soon call home.

From there Pipin spent a large portion of his life adapting and surviving. Learning the ways of the land, making himself at home in what caverns or caves he might find unoccupied. He grew strong by living on the land and learning how to hunt on his own, finding himself in favor of the curved blades and daggers that bandits would normally make use of.

As time went on, he would no longer be alone as he took on other runaway children and others who no longer had a life to return to. Creating a small band of bandits that stole not from just anyone—but from those of great wealth and fortune. Even from other bandits of the desert should they stray too close to their own hideouts. They were secretly lauded as heroes, as Pipin made habit to return most of the stolen wealth back to those of less fortune. Few would be willing to sell them out, considering they technically helped the poorer class without being held down by any of Ul’dah’s typical ruling.

That’s not to say that there aren’t those that oppose him or his ethics. Though much of his crew remain nameless, Pipin’s name and face is notorious around Thanalan… especially to those of the Brass Blades and Immortal Flames. He is known to fool with the guardsmen and sellswords, purposefully creating havoc as he plays by his own rules and defies the law without care. Though he still performs with ‘good intentions’ in his and most of every other’s eyes… he is a public nuisance upon the higher class. Thus does he find himself in trouble often with those of political weight and power. Mayhaps even found himself in a gaol or two before busting himself out.

If ever there was one so highly sought after, it would be he with his ever growing bounty on his head…

Royal AU

All begins to come to light with but a single visit. One who approached Pipin with a withered and torn letter, claiming that he is the missing prince of a particular kingdom. In the letter it contained the final words of his supposed true parents, that he was sent away when the fall of their kingdom was eminent. The messenger themselves also claimed to be the very one who brought him to Ul’dah as an infant and left him on a couple’s doorstep. Left to be blissfully unaware that he may belong elsewhere. The messenger also stating they thought never to be able to find Pipin yet again, but heard of his rise in power to the newly instated Flame General. That there may still yet be a flame left that wishes to lead a broken home…

Pipin meant to hide this and be in full denial of such nonsense! The messenger left him be, stating they’d be back some day for an answer while leaving the final letter in Pipin’s hands. The name’s of his supposed parents etched in writing… which might prove to be a familiar name should he wish to research it and confirm the roots with those who might know of the royal line.

In hopes of learning the truth and to find the answers he so desperately seeks, he speaks with Nanamo in privacy. That maybe she might be able to recognize the names or the kingdom mentioned within the contents of the letter. But of course… walls have ears in the Ul’dahn palace, as news swiftly spread of the General’s uncertain upbringing.

A power struggle begins as tensions start to flare. The Monetarists are attempting to take advantage of this uncertainty and tirelessly push Pipin towards resignation of the Immortal Flames, if he is to be of a different nationality, let alone belonging onto another royal line. Those of the other kingdom, having learned word of his finding, are beginning to show up and call for him to return home.

All the while Pipin is merely trying to find a balance he struggles with this weight thrusted upon his shoulders. Knowing only that he wished to remain in Ul’dah and keep hold of all that he’s achieved… not to be cast out for what he may very well be. Though the Sultana herself vouched for him, she too was beginning to grow involved… in that she had taken him under her wing to teach him the finer lifestyle of behaving like a ‘prince’.

Merchant AU

A fun little AU with @high-stakes-gambler where Teledji happens to purchase the very mines a young Pipin was working in at the time… and comes to find out that his biological father took advantage by selling his child along with as a means to get some coin out of the exchange. Thus does Teledji find himself in ownership and technical fatherhood of the young lad… supposing he may as well get something out of the kid by teaching him the ways of merchantry! Pipin soon to become known as a merchant’s son by his guidance.

Over time the two learn each other. Teledji ever the crooked Monetarist who took advantage of markets and the like, Pipin but a simple bright-eyed child taking to a new home and doing his best to learn how to please his sudden new father. Growing up in years however and becoming privy to Teledji’s plots and schemes… he increasingly finds himself unimpressed, if not in full disagreement with how oft the old man likes to break the law.

Their relationship goes in throws. Sometimes well mannered and sweet, but often soured by the fact that Teledji Adeledji was simply naught but a crook and scammer playing the system. Turning away for a time, Pipin joined with the Immortal Flames in search of doing honest work. He enjoys being able to help the people and learn the ways of the blade. The gap between the two continued to grow… until the very tipping point where Pipin caught onto his father’s scheme to poison the Sultana.

The young man confronts Teledji before he is to slip the poison. Exchanging a vast amount of fiery words before Pipin blurts the contents of his heart. That he didn’t want Teledji to break the law, nor did he want the man to be killed… that he was his only family to give him a true home, despite all else. These words catch the monetarist off guard and he breaks down upon realizing these truths, choosing then to ditch the plan and flee Ul’dah instead.

There Pipin helped lend a hand in secretly leaving through Vesper Bay to procure a new livelihood in Limsa Lominsa. Where Pipin finally takes a shine to learning true merchantry and operating under a new business name and all to help grow Teledji’s business from the ground up. Finally living an honest life where they might learn and grow together in a new market field.

Dwarf AU

Pipitt is a part of the Tholl tribe and son of the leading chieftain. Once a shy boy who simply rode on the coattails of their father growing up, he later on wished to take leave from Tomra. Not only to travel and explore the world over (or at least, what left remains of it), but also because he found his mindset against that of the elders and their ‘traditions’. Their rules were unchangeable. They feared outsiders and let the world rot around them both before and after the flood. Kind they may be to one’s face, but very few ever wish to leave home in the instance their kind be turned upon.

In solitude Pipitt had grown. Such strictness had molded him for a time, until he broke out of his shell and eventually wanted to leave to see the world for himself. Mayhaps even return to Tomra one day and bring about change. If he could prove his mettle on the First and encourage others to venture out as well, that they need no longer fear the outside… that in itself would prove the journey worth it.

In the days of finalizing his plan, he happened to run into an exiled dwarf by the name of Zurott. They had taken to hiding within the inner mountains all this time in shame for their past deeds… After hearing parts of their story, Pipitt took it upon himself to offer for the other to join him. A new life in a world where the warrior of darkness had rid them of everlasting light. The night had but recently returned, and they intended on learning the mysteries of the First.

Together they would go. A dwarf who had been sheltered and privileged all his life, and another who had thrown it all way and embraced freedom. Pipitt however...would finally need to learn how to fight and fend for himself.

#writing #au #bandit au #royal au #merchant au #dwarf au

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skyblue-369 · 6 years ago

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When it rains, flowers bloom

A little disclaimer before starting: I know what you're thinking. I know it doesn't look so good. I'm not an artist (or a writer lmao), I just wanted to give a general idea of how I designed the character. Remember! Criticism is acceptable, just be polite.

(I'd like to put a "read more" link on the tunblr app but I can't. If anyone reading this knows how, I'll appreciate your help.)

Plus, bonus gif at the end of the post ⬇️

Word count: 1341

"Be one of you? A member of your superhero team or something?" asked the blonde girl, finally sitting on a cut tree trunk, because at the moment all of her energy had to be switched from her limbs to her thoughts. In her mindset it was already confusing that someone had broken her daily routine. Surely accidents happened before, like the time some ravens started chasing her because her hair looked like a nest, or the time she believed covering in mud was the perfect idea to become invisible at night and almost got caught. As i said, accidents happened, but never on this level.

Moreover, those six kids were offering her to change life nonchalantly, and she didn't know if she had the strenght to do it, not again. Although living for three years in a cave all by yourself can make you crave some company, Maria wasn't sure if becoming a superhero was the right path to take. It sounded weird in her head.

<p/>"I'd prefer to use the term family."

Luckily, Ben giggled at the comment and added a clarification that would make her change point of view. "Family" was the magic word because, at the end, wasn't it everything she ever wanted?

"Wait, so they are brothers? How? Oh wait, adoption...An orphan that doesn't know siblings don't always look the same. How ironic."

Just the idea of a family, of a mum, a dad, and brothers and sisters that couldn't be afraid or jealous of her was more than tempting.

She could tolerate to use her powers more often if it meant that her reward was love.

However, the sparkle in her eyes was blown away very soon. It seemed clear that the Hargreeves had different opinions on the matter.

For example Diego, who was standing far from her until now, snapped and pointed his finger so sharply against the girl that he could almost stab her. Maybe because he was literally holding a knife in said hand.

"Wait! Wait! Wait! Not everybody agreed on this! We're already full of problems, don't you think? We don't need to add another weird kid to the list."

"He's saying that as if he wasn't one." Maria mumbled glancing at the only other girl in the room. She would rather speak Italian in order not to be understood, but there she believed she was in good faith because she wasn't mocking, just explaining her misunderstanding to Allison.

"Stop behaving like a jerk, Diego." Three caught the signal and replied, while getting off the table to protect the blondie, almost covering her view. Obviously One had to join the discussion. In fact, as Number Seven will explain to her the next day in the comfy living room of the mansion, Two's rage acts like a tornado. It is sudden and aggressive and destroys everything around it, especially Luther's patience. Moreover, It looked like One shared the same brain as his sister because they tend to agree on anything, but this time Luther's way of laying out words only made her facepalm.

"I don't know you, but for all of my childhood I had been wondering if other people with our kind of abilities even existed. Now that we found one, the least we can do is report her to Father."

"Are you listening to yourself, Luther? What childhood? If Father lays his hands on her, he'll make her suffer as he did with us, treating her like some sort of machine. We're doing her a favour."

The air was becoming thicker, both metaphorically and literally. The cave already had a little airflow owing to the fact that the entrance had to be hidden by two doors, which were a layer of plants and a sheet of iron.

Maria felt her breath even heavier. It was the first conversation when she wasn't just staring from afar since a long time. She wasn't used to talking, let alone arguing. She wanted to light the mood but didn't know how, and tried to find advice in Ben's eyes, still in contact with hers.

"Don't want to interrupt you guys or something, but shouldn't we be asking her? Anyway honey, how can you not get your boobs stuck into this thing? Tell me your secret!"

Who could tell that the miracle could reside in the only person who didn't speak a single syllable in the whole fight, if we count that Five was muttering to himself!

That kind soul of Klaus was laying on his stomach on the girl's floating bed, that wasn't so practical to sleep in. What would you expect from a net, "purchased" by some gentle fishermen, attached to the roof of the cave and decorated with some pillows?

In fact, the boy was having fun tracing the outline of its holes, while gazing at Maria through one of them.

The poor girl was trying to cover her almost flat chest with her arms, her blush fading into the orange light of the candles. Everybody seemed to empathize with her embarassment and fell into silence for a second.

"Not that she can really choose, Klaus. Tell me, how long did you think you could live like this?" Five was too serious to get distracted from his brother's nonsense and actually heard his only logical sentence.

"Scostumato (Rude)! You have no idea how many things I had to steal just to give some colour to this room!" finally Maria managed to talk back and wanted to approach that old-young man. On the other side, Five's eyes were moving around so fast to analyze every piece of furniture, but could never stop to look at the blondie.

That's the change of subject that the "rescue team" needed to shot the final question.

"So what do you say? Wanna come?" almost sang Ben to sound more convincing, causing Four to laugh a little.

Maria told them without any frills how amazing it would have been to join them.

"I'd like to, but I respect every opinion, even Diego's..." these were her words.

They didn't show the complete truth, she was just being polite.

"Don't listen to him, he's always so grumpy." Allison tried to calm her down, while glancing at Number Two, who was already stepping outside.

"I'm going. Reach me when you finish this puppet show." he growled, right before putting in act his dramatic exit.

He was just moving the door when his hand was caught by Maria's.

"Where do you think you're going? We're deep in the forest, you'd get lost for sure." she gave him a lovable smile, mixed of concern and satisfaction, which made Diego freeze subtly. He felt trapped by some memories.

This allowed the girl to pass him, make a little turn and march backwards to see if everything was at its place.

"You have to go to the main road, right? Let me guide you myself! And can the last one who comes out turn the candles off, please? We don't want to start a fire."

One at a time, they all passed around the little lake avoiding to step into the water.

The only exception was for Klaus, who didn't care about the waterfall when he ran to the others. Turning off the lights didn't take a lot, he was just stealing a jar full of suspicious herbs.

"So, what's the verdict, my partner in crime?" he asked, hugging Ben from behind.

"I'll take it as a yes..."

"Welcome to our dysfunctional family, honey!" he shouted, as on the other side of the line the blonde girl crawled a little on herself, putting her arms around her waist. A golden tear fell straight to the ground, giving birth to a daisy.

She was leaving that place as if she just slept there for a night. She's never had a connection with it, really. The only thing that attracted her was the beauty of nature, which could be found everywhere. And then, all the good memories she wanted to keep were already treasured in her blue t-shirt.

Preparing to get childhood traumas with the Hargreeves be like:

(Kiernan Shipka looks so cute in this I can't)

#umbrella academy oc #uaocsdaily #ocappreciation #tua ocs #tua #umbrella acedmy #the umbrella academy #drawing

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someoneintheshadow456 · 6 years ago

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i understand the heart of where you were coming from with your response on the edelgard post. but i would like you to know that i think you have some misconceptions in your argument. firstly, korea's "religious fanaticism" especially in regards to christianic religion, is more of a phenomenon with korean immigrants, and is not reflective of the predominant religious views in korea itself.

As a korean myself, i can say that it is unlikely that koreans are inclined to be against edelgard simply because the church in game is inclined against her. speaking with various other asian poc, those who do not like edelgard are primarily against her due to much of her activities in-game calling to mind japan’s imperialistic history of invading our countries and colonizing us.

Regardless of whether people believe edelgard’s individual motivations are justifiable or not, it must be recognized that much of the game seems to promote a very pro-imperialistic agenda. even in non-edelgard routes, the endings are very leaned towards centralizing control of the continent often with disregard of independent state’s wishes. edelgard’s position as primary antagonist means that it is easy to see her as the primary representative of this mindset.

I don’t believe that the op is wrong in asserting that americans have favored edelgard while koreans have not for certain reasons. while the context is different, her popularity in japan versus korea can most likely be accounted for along similar lines of a history of imperialism. while fans of edelgard may not be in favor of her specifically for these views, there is a fundamental difference in perspective american and japanese fans are coming to the game with.

I dont believe that the op is wrong in asserting that americans have favored edelgard while koreans have not for certain reasons. while the context is different, her popularity in japan versus korea can most likely be accounted for along similar lines of a history of imperialism. while fans of edelgard may not be in favor of her specifically for these views, there is a fundamental difference in perspective american and japanese fans are coming to the game with. Sorry if this was an excessive explanation.

As a lesbian, i find a lot of traits of edelgard that i like. as a korean, however, my discomfort with her is great enough that i shy away from her. i respect who you choose to like or dislike in the game, and am only aiming to maybe inform what i felt was an argument formed on an incomplete misunderstanding of my country’s culture and history.

TLDR: The korean dislike of edelgard can be more attributed to the history of violent colonization from japan that she brings to mind. as japan executed this kind of behavior against many asian countries, this is a sentiment shared by several of my other asian peers. thank you if youve read all of these rambling messages xp, its an important topic to me and i wanted you to know religious fanatacism at the very least isnt a fully accurate description of my people

Thanks for the explanation and I can understand where you’re coming from when you put it in this way.

I also acknowledge that my negative experiences with Korean immigrants may have coloured my perception on the matter. In India we have had Koreans come here because of Hyundai, and the ones they sent here behaved so badly (I used to joke that Korea was using India as a garbage dump for its undesirables because there was no way the entire country was like that) that many real estate agents in India will not lease properties to Koreans. And now Hyundai has to give its employees racial sensitivity training in order to send them to India. This was in the mid-late 2000s however, so I’m sure things have changed since then.

India has a history of colonization as well by the Mughals and British. Rhea always reminded me of Mother Theresa (who put on a maternal/loving facade to disguise the fact that her hospitals were essentially “dying houses” where she would baptize people on their deathbeds, and was notorious for grooming her patients into thinking their sickness was “a blessing from Jesus”) and other Christian missionaries which was why she left such a bad taste in my mouth. Rhea’s behaviour is how British colonists in general also behaved, pretending to be a benefactor and kind to her subjects while actually abusing them. Even though the Indian Fire Emblem fanbase is very small, the ones who I’ve talked to have a dislike of Rhea for those reasons as well. However I don’t say that people who like Rhea are religious zealots/fanatics/whatever, because your fiction doesn’t affect your morality.

My problem with a lot of Blue Lions fans is many of them get overzealous when it comes to their path and tend to antagonize Edelgard fans, insinuating that ALL OF THEM have radfem-esque principles and only like Edelgard because she’s a woman/because she’s bisexual, or that they have White supremacist beliefs even if they’re POC themselves. They also think that if you’re a fan of Edelgard, you MUST hate Dimitri, even though many of them don’t. And the hypocritical Black Eagles fans who come under the faction that Blue Lions fans are attacking make things worse for the normal Black Eagles fans who are just trying to enjoy the content, because we get lumped in with the crazies.

All this nonsense makes me want to join with Golden Deers even though I don’t really like Claude that much, because they’re the only group that doesn’t fight with everyone all the time.

#fire emblem three houses #discourse

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