#CRIES THANK YOU SOMUCH FOR ASKING...

[heartorbit]

!!! You saw my ask! I’m v glad you liked the question and since you asked for ppl to share their takes on the charas I’ll give mine:

Rui as the fox was what started it all for me. Like “great shows can’t be made alone” and the fox talking about all the wonderful things that would happen if he were to be tamed… Rui’s craving for connection just fit the fox so well.

The other three I mostly chose for like, scenes/dynamics I wanted to see with them. So Tsukasa and Emu are the little prince and the rose respectively bc of their back-and-forth of *wild statement* *exaggerated frustration* but ultimately Tsukasa does want to take care of her (thinking of him calling her “our stubborn little princess” in his Smile of a Dreamer card story). And like the prince’s arc from running away from the rose because he can’t keep up with her requests before he realizes he needs to go back to her and Tsukasa’s begrudging assistance in the main story to swearing to help Emu save the stage.

And Nene’s the aviator for largely the same reasons: her and Tsukasa’s bickering just makes me think Nene would absolutely get fed up with Tsukasa insulting her sheep and just draw him a box instead. And her role as the “normal” one in the group also lends to it (emphasis on the quotes). She calls everyone in the troupe crazy for accepting a robot while she’s the one piloting the robot. She’s grown up, let go of being childish, but she’s still listening intently to the little prince’s story.

But like your casting is so so good! The longer I think abt it the more I love it. Like little prince Emu’s asteroid hopping is so perfect; she’s meeting all these grownups who care only about sums and wealth and other pointless things and it’s all just very odd to her. And Rui drawing the boa constrictor is heartbreaking. He’s trying to convey something through his art that nobody around him can understand… And Emunene being the little prince and the fox. They’re absolutely this quote from the fox: “Other steps send me hurrying back underneath the ground. Yours will call me, like music, out of my burrow.” And the slow, deliberate process it takes to tame a fox, and how long it took to get Nene to come out of her shell while Emu constantly reached out to her; they’re adorable. And Tsukasa will cry and throw up if he isn’t special ur so right. Tysm for responding to my ask!

OOOOOOOOH MYJTJ IT'S SO CUTE I CRIED FOREVER I LOVE THESE SOMUCH THANK YOU FOR SENDING YOUR DRAWINGS I T____T emu rose is the cutest ever ever ever. i love YOUR CASTING SO MUCH. here i throw this before i go under a readmore to scream

YOURS FIT SO DAMN WELL. SO WELL

THE STUBBORN LITTLE PRINCESS LINE KILLLLLS ME IT KILLS ME YOURE SO RIGHT OAKYT AUUUUUUUWUUWU i take 800 years to respond to this both because i absolutely had to draw again for your cast and also i look at your beautiful drawings and i scream and kick my feet and grip my phone so hard it breaks into a million pieces

i;m so normal Your drawings are so lovely they feel right from a storybook ooouh nene as the aviator is really getting me. with how nene had to look back at her child self to rediscover what was so important to her passion for singing and it fits so well. waugh. """normal""" one for sure. but her loyalty is really fitting of both the aviator and the fox.. her and rui really are alike in the most dastardly heart crushing ways

rui as the fox. AH. I SHALL CRY. brother does he ever run the risk of weeping.. and just the abject boredom of the fox in its loneliness fits rui really well. after their fight in the main story how they approach rui more and more.. but you will sit a little closer to me every day..

your emu rose is so cute i can't get over it but i love this casting so much. i love how you connected the princes responsibility to the rose with the main story and their promise to save the wonderstage. Oh my god their stubborn little princess. THEIR STUBBORN LITTLE PRINCESS

i acknowledged that i just have emu favoritism severely when i gave them a casting but when i thought of her as the prince beyond whimsy i was thinking a lot of the ending, how the prince doesn't want the aviator to see him look to be in suffering and when says he can't return home and his body is too heavy.. the wonderstage being emus home where she wants everyone to always smile but also the place she's convinced she can't leave .. something something im not good at this. but with tsukasa i think that works equally as well because of how he shunned and ran away from it at first but at the end the wonderstage is where his heart really was and how he lets go of his old self. auuugh.

and for tsukasa as the rose and how emu finds his shows so dazzling even though he sees himself as one of hundreds of thousands of actors that he's not yet on the level of. but to emu he IS one of a kind. also because it is for her that i have killed the caterpillars (except she grabbed a caterpillar and shoved it into his face that one time but) sniffle. SNIFFLE. because it is she that i have listened to when she grumbled or boasted...

ok your little prince tsukasa is starting to kill me i AHGBHH you're singlehandedly making me want and need to reread the little prince again but ooh my god. my star will be just be one of the stars for you and so you will love to watch all the stars in the heavens (falls over) i shall look as if i were suffering i shall look a little as if i were dying do not come to see that (FALLS OVER)

[theboykingofhell]

can you tell us about some of your ocs?? :D

FJGKSGSGSG EEEEEEEEEEEEEE CERTAINLY

OK I,,, have a lot omg like so many random ocs who i throw into this rp group i’m in and they just float along but i have like.. THREE main novel series and the protags of each of those are like... the MAIN babies so i’ll talk about them!!!

so, there’s RED my fave awful devilchild i’ve had him since high school omfg. he’s the lil guy chilling on my sidebar!!! he comes from a (currently unnamed, oops) dystopic novel i’m writing atm, he’s the leader of an ‘extremist’ group that call themselves the cancer kids who are fighting this city’s intense need to control the world through medications and resource control (the landscape is cHOCK FULL of polluted water, you can only get clean water through them!). he started as an antihero but he’s actually the antichrist, INCREDIBLY chaotic, rly only fighting for the good side by accident because they just so happen to want the same people as him dead. have i mentioned he’s satan yet? he’s satan. beautiful unstable gay af satan.

i mentioned before but all my protags come in lil duos so red’s partner-in-crime is gabriel (aka black), who is the whatever-the-fuck-his-name-is to red’s gatsby. he’s a frail angel that red and the kids kidnapped saved who is now being indoctrinated taught the truth of the world and the conspiracy against the city and red shows him the world and black is a little in love with him? a lot in love with him??? you see the story through black’s eyes as he just kinda follows red around like a puppy as he dismantles, like, everything. its gay

-

next story is!!!!!!!!!!! called tsg (the slaughtering game) featuring rly gayass vampire lesbians nisha and nora.

nisha is the narrator and she is STRUGGLING. she’s ocd, she was adopted into a white family who had NO idea how to deal with her, and everyone she loves keeps dying and she blames herself every time??? she’s a cop-in-training and DEEEESPERATELY in love with her best friend, like, too in love to even cope with it. 

nora, her bestie, is a M E S S. along with all her other mental shits (i cant be bothered listing everyone’s mental illnesses, all my ocs have at least 3 each tbh), she’s suffering from rly bad ptsd and refuses to recover from it, she’s super self-destructive and pretty much exists to, in her head, get thrown into abuse until it kills her. nisha is the only one keeping her alive tbh. SO! one day nora goes missing and nisha’s story is her trying to find out what happened to her!!

spoiler alert: what happens is a vampire asshole named aaron, who is sheer piss. i hate him. i love him.

-

LAST STORY probably my oldest one cuz i started it like! end of middle school but, like tsg, i only just revamped it! this one also has the most amount of main characters oops

soooo main MAIN character is rachel! she is the. angriest. girl on the planet. ACTUALLY I SHOULD EXPLAIN. this story is called.. comet’s curse is the working title, lol, and it’s an alien scifi. the aliens, nicknamed ‘chimaera’, are a symbiotic race of parasites that quite literally crashed onto earth via an asteroid. long story short, the chimaeran parasite forces its hosts to mutate after a perceived threat of danger, and it has to cannibalize to maintain that form or burn out. OK COOL.

so, rACHEL’s parents worked for exodus, which is the military branch/project kind of trying to deal with the existence of chimaera? not necessarily kill ALL of them but find a cure, find uses for them, contain the problem, etc. rachel’s parents fucked up and got killed by a chimaera and rachel is hellbent on rEEEVEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEENGE.

her adopted brother, HER partner-in-crime, is caleb! caleb is a chimaeran host, referred to as a ‘catalyst’ as he hasnt ‘evolved’, or mutated, yet, altho he was born with some obvious nonhuman traits. since he was raised with her, he’s got this huge complex about being Other or seen as a Monster and desperately wants to be human and no one will LET HIM my poor sad baby. he fights alongside rachel +_+

NOW... caleb’s MOTHER is amara, aka the ‘hydra’, aka the most infamous dangerous chimaera out there, AKA the killer of rachel’s parents SO, AS YOU CAN SEE, there’s a TAD BIT OF TENSION and im absolutely in love with it. rachel and hydra wanna kill each other and caleb just wants them all to love each other without necessarily taking a side, it’s a mess and it’s great.

... ANYWAY THAT’S THE MAIN GIST i should put this under a read more but NAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH

[watchmegetobsessed]

VALERIE - Part X. (Harry Styles)

I can’t believe the time has come, this is the lats part of VALERIE! I won’t be long here, will leave a longer message at the end, but I just want to thank you all for reading an dliking this story, it means somuch to me, because I worked a lot on it! So thank you so much for giving it your love!

word count: ~7.5k

SERIES MASTERPOST

masterlist

The days and weeks blur into one dark mess around you as you’re just going through the motions, surviving day by day. The pain you first felt after everything that happened with Harry started to turn into a numbness in your chest until you just simply stopped feeling anything at all. 

Following the encounter in the car he tried to call you several times, but you were quick to turn your phone off and delete all the messages he left. He kept on going for an entire week, trying to get you to talk to him, but you refused to even be in the same room as him, your anger was still blinding and you didn’t trust yourself with not killing him if you laid your eyes on him. 

He sent you texts, emails, even left letters in your mailbox, but you threw them away not wanting to hear his petty excuses about why he made you miserable for so long. 

There were days when you weakened and almost reached out for him. In the past few months when your relationship abruptly changed, you definitely felt yourself fall for him, but then you reminded yourself that he chose to hurt you in the past on purpose and didn’t even try to change, not even when he saw how much his behavior affected you. 

Slowly, the calls and messages got less frequent until they stopped. You haven’t heard from him in over two months and though you still find yourself lying in bed with tears in your eyes, thinking about him, you’ve made yourself believe that you are better off without him. He has probably moved on already and got back to his playboy habits. He was always good in that, picking up random chicks, using them and then throwing them away when he felt like that. 

You never told anyone what really happened. One time you just broke down in front of Rosa when he mentioned something about Harry. You couldn’t speak or breathe and she didn’t try to force you to tell her the story, but she figured it was something serious if you were so broken. She stopped bringing him up even though some days you were dying to hear just the smallest crumb of information about him. 

You could only hope that time would heal the wound on your heart, but for a very long time you thought you wouldn’t feel like yourself again ever. But somehow, as the weeks rushed by you and life has gotten busy around you, you slowly stopped thinking about him every minute of the day until you were able to push it to the back of your mind and carry on with your life. Or at least pretend like you stopped thinking about him. 

Two weeks after Harry’s confession you and Marcus broke up. You just had to face that it wouldn’t have worked no matter how hard you were trying. You hated how you could hear Harry’s words when you finally ended things, how he told you that you have to let go of him and you wouldn’t admit, but when you cried yourself to sleep that night, it wasn’t because of Marcus, but because you were missing Harry.

On his birthday you almost broke and sent him a text, even typed it in, but you deleted it not long after. You wondered how he spent it, thinking he must have had a party or something, but you were surprised when Rosa called you that evening to talk about something entirely different.

“You didn’t have plans tonight?” you carefully asked with a hint of suspicion. It was weird that if Harry was having a birthday party, Rosa and Steven weren’t invited.

“No, nothing. Why?” she asked, but she knew exactly your reason behind the question.

“Doesn’t matter.”

You found it weird, but didn’t let yourself rave about it too long or else you would have found yourself going down the same spiral you were trying to get out of for so long. 

Each passing day brought a different emotion and you had to find your way through life while fighting them. You couldn’t see further than just a few days ahead and though it scared you, how drained and dark everything felt, there was not much you could do other than… wait.

***

Sitting at the dinner table you listen to Steven talk about this new coworker he has and how clumsy the dude is, your plate is half full in front of you but you don’t feel like you’ll be able to finish it anyway. 

Rosa looks in your way, her eyes flickering down at your plate and she lets out a worried sigh.

“Y/N, have you been eating enough? You look so… skinny.”

“I’ve just been busy lately, skipping a few meals,” you tell her with an absentminded smile, trying to stop her from worrying, but she knows you better than that. Nodding at her husband they exchange a silent conversation before Steven leaves the table excusing himself, and taking Valerie with himself he walks upstairs leaving the two of you alone.

“Y/N, I’m seriously worried about you. This… can’t go on like this.”

“It’s not like I chose to be so miserable,” you mumble under your breath, but she ignores the comment. 

“Look, I’ve been very patient with you, didn’t push you to talk about what happened, but I feel like you are crossing a line that’s very dangerous and I’m not just gonna watch you lose yourself.” 

Taking a deep breath she leans back in her chair with a look in her eyes you don’t get too often, only when she is ready to go full mother mode on you.

“What Harry did was fucked up, I gotta give it to you. Acting like a dick all those years, there’s no excuse for that. But I don’t understand why you rejected him so harshly when he told you about his feelings.”

“So he told you what happened,” you roll your eyes. You definitely did not tell her anything, so it must have been Harry.

“Don’t pretend like you weren’t expecting it. He always says how much Steven gossips, but he was the one who barged in here when you two had that major fight.”

“What? He came here right after?” you ask and Rosa realizes that maybe she should have kept it to herself, but it’s too late now. 

“He did. He was a hot mess, it was… the first time I ever saw him cry.” You bite into your bottom lip. That night had the same effect on you and though deep down you were hoping he felt the same pain, it was still surprising to hear about the state he was in after you parted ways. “He told us about everything, and though I wanted to murder him for the way he treated you for that long, I could see the panic in his eyes when he said how you reacted. As if… he just saw the apocalypse or something.”

“Don’t make it more dramatic than it really was,” you sigh, but Rosa keeps a straight face.

“I’m not. Probably shouldn’t tell you this, but he was shaking, couldn’t breath evenly, I think he went through a whole panic attack, all because of you.” You keep your mouth shut as you listen to your sister talking. “He explained it in details, everything that happened at the wedding, after that and since then. Went through the whole story and when he finished, he didn’t even have to say it out loud, I knew how painfully in love he was with you all along. That doesn’t change the fact that he should have handled the situation in a better way, but at least he acknowledged his own mistakes. He asked me if I thought you’d ever forgive him.”

“And what did you say?”

“I said that I genuinely didn’t know. And I still don’t know. Because I’m looking at you being just a ghost of yourself, clearly still in pain because of him, but you still didn’t even give him the chance to talk. You’d rather destroy yourself than to face him and your own feelings for him.”

Her words sting more than you were expecting and those stupid tears are welling in your eyes again, even though you truly thought you were drained out by now. Looking down at your hands you feel your face contorting as you start crying.

“Oh, Sweetheart,” Rosa breathes out and taking your hand she pulls you to the couch in the living room. She sits right next to you, pulling you into her arms as you start sobbing. “I know it hurts, but he didn’t mean to hurt you like that.”

“It’s not even that,” you choke out, not holding it back anymore. “I miss him so much, Rosa! I don’t want to, but I miss him so much!”

“Then why are you torturing yourself?”

“Because how am I supposed to believe him after what he did? What guarantees that it’s not just another stupid game for him, how do I know that? I don’t know how to believe him anymore.”

Rosa pushes you away so she can wipe your cheeks with her thumbs, a warm smile sitting on her lips as you try to control your sobbing. 

“You can’t know that. You just… have to put yourself all out and hope for the best.”

“I was really hoping you wouldn’t say that,” you grimace, making her laugh. 

“You think it was easy when I met Steven?”

“What do you mean?” you huff sitting up straight.

“I just got out of a horrible relationship, definitely not in the mood to date anyone and I was also very scared that everything would just happen the same way as before. It took me so much time to trust him even though he didn’t do anything wrong. I had to get over these fears and just believe that it won’t be the same. Nothing can guarantee you that you won’t end up with a heartbreak.”

“This is definitely not what I wanted to hear,” you choke out through your teary eyes, but manage to turn it into a laugh as Rosa chuckles with you pulling you in for another hug.

“I know, but it’s the truth.” She fixes your hair as you lean back from her. “So tell me. If you think about Harry, what’s the first thing that comes to your mind?”

You don’t answer right away, but the answer comes to you quickly. At the mention of Harry you don’t think of all the pain and hurt he has caused you, but of the good times you spent together. When you were struggling with Valerie the first time you looked after her and he came to the rescue.

“Maybe she needs to be changed?” Harry suggests holding her up, giving her butt a sniff, but you roll your eyes at him.

“You don’t think that was one of the first things I did? She is as clean as she could be. Maybe I should just call Rosa,” you sigh in defeat reaching for your phone but Harry snaps at you.

“No! Don’t, we can figure this out. Steven has been so excited to have a night off, we can’t ruin this for them. Come on, we have to have the slightest parenting skills and solve this without them.”

Nodding you agree with him, but you’ve completely run out of ideas.

“So what do you suggest?”

You can see the gears turning in Harry’s head as he is trying to come up with a plan, but it’s not like either of you have any experience with babies. The idea of calling Rosa is starting to burn in the back of your head, fear of failing this challenge taking over your thoughts.

Then Harry looks at you with a look that screams that he has an idea. You’re just about to ask what came into his mind when all of a sudden he starts to sing.

“Well, sometimes I go out by myself and I look across the water, and I think of all the things what you’re doing and in my head I paint a picture…”

You instantly recognize Amy Whinehouse’s iconic song, the one that’s also behind Valerie’s name, you know that for sure. Rosa was obsessed with the song growing up, she would sing it on the way to school, in the shower or while making dinner. You weren’t surprised she chose this name for her first daughter.

What surprises you that Harry sings like a literal angel. He hits the notes perfectly, nailing the lines like not many can and you listen to him with parted lips, eyebrows raised. This was the last thing you expected from him, but then again, it’s not the first time Harry has surprised you through the years of knowing him.

You still can’t help but smile how the two of you, incompetent godparents had to put up a whole show to put Valerie to sleep. 

Then there was Christmas, when the two of you played never have I ever until six in the morning, having the best time you’d had in a long time.

“Never have I ever said the wrong person’s name while having sex.” A devilish smile sits on your lips as you watch him drink while you do the same. You see his eyebrows rise over the glass.

“Nasty,” he huffs. “When did that happen?”

“First year of college. I was casually seeing a guy, but I wasn’t really over my last ex from high school and accidentally called him Ethan.”

“And what was his real name?”

“I don’t even remember,” you admit with a laugh, clearly feeling the alcohol slowly kicking in. Harry’s mouth hangs open before his expressions turn into that iconic ‘not bad’ face.

“Never have I ever had a wet dream about a friend of mine,” Harry asks and you feel your cheeks heating up right away, eyes snapping down at your glass. Unwillingly, but you drink as Harry does the same. “Who was it?”

“I’m not answering this one,” you shake your head. 

“Come on! I promise it’ll stay between us. Was it Steven?” he grins at you, clearly enjoying your embarrassment. “I bet it was Steven.”

“Shut up, it wasn’t!” you snap at him rolling your eyes.

“Okay, then who? I won’t sleep tonight if you don’t tell me!” he begs, but you shake your head stubbornly. “Do I know him?” Oh, all too well, you think to yourself. “Is it someone who was there at the bar last time?”

“Can we move past it?” you sigh painfully.

“No, no way. I’m not leaving you alone until you tell me!”

“It was you.”

The words slip out fast and a little quiet, but he hears them clear. His lips part, a truly stunned look pulls on his face and you just wish you didn’t say a word.

The thought of sleeping next to him that evening, or rather morning, it felt like you’ve reached a huge milestone. You didn’t admit it then, but you were already falling for him, harder than you wanted. The whole next day and the two of you sleeping together again the next night, it still holds a special place in your heart. You truly felt happy with him and it wouldn’t have been the same without him. 

And there are so many more that make you smile just by thinking about them. Even after everything that happened, he is still the one that makes you smile.

Turning to Rosa you can’t even answer, just sigh in despair, but it tells her everything she needs to know.

“Listen. I know it’s hard, and that he hurt you badly, but… at least give him a chance to talk to you.”

“What if he doesn’t even want to talk anymore?” you huff. “Maybe he already has someone--”

Rosa starts laughing, maybe louder than she should and you look at her with a surprised expression.

“Ah, there’s no way. The guy has been moping around, barely even leaving his home for weeks. I can’t even get him out to go walking with me and Val. There’s no way he picked anyone up. No woman would stand the long face he has been sporting. So don’t worry about that.”

You sit there for a little while, trying your best to clear your thoughts and it’s nice that Rosa is there with you. If it wasn’t for her and Steven, all of this would have happened so differently, or maybe it wouldn’t have even happened. 

“Who would have thought this is where we would end up?” you sigh the rhetorical question, but Rosa gifts you with an answer.

“I did,” she nods confidently.

“What?”

“Oh, I saw the way you two looked at each other at the wedding. And I’m not gonna say that our choice for the two of you to be godparents was strategic, but… we definitely had some secret intentions with it.”

“What the Hell, Rosa?!” you gasp at her. 

“Oh come on!” she rolls her eyes. “I knew there was something, I was just not sure where it’s gonna head. And I’m not a nosy old lady to poke my nose into your business, so I was just enjoying the show.”

“I hate you so much,” you chuckle, shaking your head, but you couldn’t be mad at her. You have no idea how it will end, but at the end, you are still happy for the memories you share with Harry.

***

Friday evenings used to be Harry’s favorite. There was always something happening, somewhere to go, someone to meet up with, but it hasn’t been like that for a while now. Nothing seemed interesting or fun enough to get him out of his home. Instead, his usual became to just sit at home, contemplate if he should call you, then have way too much to drink and fall asleep either on the couch or if he made it to his bed, he thought about that day a lucky one. 

Not one day went by without the paining thought of the look he saw in your eyes when you told him you didn’t want to see him. It felt like his whole world collapsed right on top of him and for weeks he felt like he wouldn’t ever see the sunlight from under the debris. 

He had no one to blame but himself, and he really put a lot of effort into punishing himself. Cutting everything out from his life that brought him even the slightest joy, he was ready to live the rest of his life in sorrow. 

Tonight is no different. He had a long day and arriving home he was quick to fix himself a drink before sinking down to the couch, not even bothering to turn the lights on. He likes the darkness, it’s comforting and fits his mood nowadays. Sipping on his drink he sinks down on the couch, letting his eyes close as he gives himself a few moments to rest his mind and body. When his glass empties out he decides to just have a shower and call it a day, not feeling like dealing with anything, but just as he is on his way to the bathroom, his doorbell rings.

You’ve been standing at his front door for about fifteen minutes now. You noticed how it was all dark in his house, but his car was on the driveway and you knew he is not one to walk anywhere, so you figured that he might just be in the bathroom or something. But the longer you stood on his doormat, the harder it was getting for you to actually ring the bell.

It’s been a few days since your talk with Rosa and you haven’t stopped thinking about everything she said, coming to the conclusion that even though you still have no idea what you wanted from Harry, you had to give him another chance to talk. 

You almost left two times, walking down the stairs before running back up to the door. The third time you actually rang the doorbell, but when you heard it, when you realized that you actually pushed the button, you almost threw up.

Now you are hearing his footsteps coming towards the door and when he opens it and you see him standing right in front of you, for a short moment you forget to breathe. Last time you saw him you were ready to throw hands at him, but now… you would rather just run up to him and hug him as tight as you can.

It’s clear he hasn’t been his usual self either, the dark circles under his eyes are proof that he hasn’t been spending too much time sleeping, his posture lacks his usual confidence and he looks a lot paler than you rememberred him. 

“Hey,” you manage to breathe out as he stares at you like you’re a ghost. And honestly? You feel like one. 

As if Harry just suddenly wakes up, he steps back holding the door open for you. “Come on in!” he urges you and you shyly smile at him walking past him. It’s completely dark inside, but he is quick to switch the lights on once the front door is closed again.

“I, uhh-- do you want something to drink? Or eat?” he offers, rubbing his palms against his thighs, but you shake your head no.

“Can we talk? Or is it a bad time for you?”

“No, I have absolutely nothing to do. Take a seat,” he gestures towards the couch and the two of you walk over, sitting down on the two sides with a considerably big space in between. 

You have absolutely no idea what to say. You should have come here prepared, or at least should have thought about how to start this, because now you’re just sitting there in the most awkward silence you’ve ever had to put up with. But before you could figure out what to say, Harry breaks the deafening silence.

“Y/N, I’m… so sorry. For everything. I know that I already told you that, but I will never stop apologizing. Because what I did was absolutely inappropriate, no matter what stood behind my actions. I swear I had the right intention at the beginning, but I had to face a situation I never had before, and I panicked. A-And when I realized what I did… I guess I thought it was too late to back out.”

You watch him scoot a little closer as he takes a deep breath and continues.

“I was a proper idiot. I hurt you because I couldn’t deal with my own feelings and I expected you to just… forget about it when I finally came clear to you, but you had every right to be mad at me. You still do. And I wouldn’t blame you if you didn’t want to see me again, like, ever… but I want you to know, that I love you, and I will never forgive myself for what I did to you.”

You can’t push the smile down that tugs on your lips. All those fears you talked about to Rosa, how you don’t know if you’re gonna be able to believe him, they faded away the moment he said he loves you. And though you still have so much to talk about and work on, you just know you need him. No matter how mad you’ve been, how much pain he caused you, he is the one you are meant to be with and no one can change your mind about that.

Pushing yourself closer your knee bumps against his thigh and you reach out, running your fingers down the side of his face. He sucks on his breath at your touch, leaning into it immediately and you cup his face in your palm.

“You have to forgive yourself,” you tell him softly and his eyes flicker up to meet your gaze. “Because one day I will forgive you and I can’t have you stuck in the past if we are gonna give it a try.”

His eyebrows rise up at your last words, lips parting as he stares at you in awe. You surprised yourself a little with what you just said, you weren’t planning on going into such depths, but it just felt natural and you knew it had to be said. It’s not gonna be easy, build up your trust in him and a whole relationship after everything happened, but you’d never forgive yourself if you didn’t even try. 

“I’ll need you to be patient with me, and I promise I’ll try my best to move forward with you, but I know that one day it’s all gonna be alright. And if you really feel the way you told me, I think we could give it a try. Give us a try.”

A sweet and relieved chuckle shakes through his chest as he reaches forward, his arms curling around you as he pulls you into his tight embrace. You hug his neck sharing his laughter, the warmth of his body pressed against yours wiping clean all the misery you went through alone in the past weeks.

“Of course I feel that way!” he breathes out, talking against your neck. “I love you and I’m gonna prove it to you every fucking day for the rest of my life.”

Blinking your tears away you lean back so you can see his beautiful eyes and you shiver when you see them filled with tears. For a few moments the two of you are just staring at each other with growing smiles, your hands slide up his chest and stop at the back of his neck as you pull him closer, resting your forehead against his.

“I’m still mad at you,” you tell him, but you can’t stop yourself from breaking a smile. Harry chuckles lightly, nuzzling his nose against yours.

“Does this mean you won’t let me kiss you?”

“If you don’t kiss me, I’ll be fucking fuming,” you warn him, making him laugh, but he surely doesn’t want to try his luck, because a moment later he presses his lips against yours, capturing them in a sweet first, but not really first kiss. 

He kisses you over and over again, not wanting to pull away, he feels like he can’t get enough of you, and you share the feeling. The urge to touch him feel his hot skin under your fingertips is numbing and you just want to stay like this forever, locked in his arms, feeling him shower you with his love.

“I love you, Y/N. I love you so fucking much,” he breathes out when you finally pull away and your heart is threatening to break out of your chest every time you hear him say those words. You cup his cheeks in your hands and make him look you in the eyes.

“I love you too, Harry,” you whisper, and as the words roll down your tongue, it feels like something inside you just clicked. Like you found exactly where you should be at this moment. Like you found your home.

“Say that again, please,” he breathes out, fingers digging into your waist.

“I love you,” you tell him with a growing smile, before you pull him in for another kiss. Then another… and another…

***

“Up! Up!” Valerie demands, her tiny hands up in the air as she reaches towards you. Chuckling you lean down and lift her up into your arms, earning a sweet giggle from her.

“Are You excited about your baby brother? He’s gonna be here very soon,” you tell her and she looks at you with her bright eyes nodding her head.

“I be big sista’!” she cheers throwing her hands into the air and you nod chuckling. 

“Yes, you will be a big sister!”

“Hopefully a patient and good big sister, right, Val?” Rosa speaks up from behind the two of you, her bump so big, it seems like she could pop any minute, but she still has two weeks until her due date. She’s been joking about carrying a mega baby for quite some time now.

Val just nods at what her mother said before she demands to be let down and the moment her feet touch the grass, she is off to conquer something new.

“Everything alright, momma?” you ask your sister and she sighs with a tired smile.

“I’m fine, could use a good night sleep without having to get up to pee every two hours.”

You just chuckle and slide a hand over her bump, just when you feel the little boy kick in there. You gasp at the feeling of a tiny foot, or maybe hand meeting your palm over Rosa’s tummy.

“He is feisty,” she chuckles, running a hand over her tummy as well. 

“Do you guys have a name already?”

“Uh, not yet. But you know me, will probably decide it when he pops out. That was kind of the case with Val too.”

The two of you turn to the side when you hear the laughter of the little girl in talk and you see Harry throwing her over his shoulder as if she was just a little doll, and Valerie is enjoying how he is tossing her around even throwing her up in the air before catching her.

You can’t hide your widening smile at the sight of your goddaughter and boyfriend being the best duo. Harry never fails to amaze you how great he is with little kids, but it’s also funny if you think back at the time he had to come over to your place because he was freaking out the first time he was babysitting Val. He has come a long way since then for sure.

“So, how is living with Harry going?” Rosa asks when she sees that you can’t take your eyes off Harry. 

The two of you moved in together just a few months ago, and though you had quite some fears about moving too fast, you can’t say any of them were relevant. The transition from living alone to living with Harry was fast and smooth, as if it was always meant to happen so fast. It was actually his idea, when your lease was nearing its end in March, he mentioned that you could always just move to him and not look for another place. It took you a few days, but you eventually made the decision to take this step in your relationship, and now you couldn’t be happier with your choice. You get to come home to him after work, share a bed and wake up next to him every day. You wouldn’t want it any other way.

“It’s pretty great. Going better than I thought,” you admit truthfully.

“I hope you know mom is already planning your wedding,” she scoffs and you just roll your eyes.

“I know. She’s been hinting it for Harry as well.”

“Has she?”

“Yeah. Like, every time she sees him, she makes sure he knows that he is expected to propose as soon as possible.”

“And how does that sit with Harry?” You just smile shrugging your shoulder.

“He dodges it every time, but I feel like he is fine with it. Maybe he is already planning it.”

“I bet he is,” Rosa grins. “The guy is head over heels in love with you, anyone could see that.”

Just as she says that, Harry’s eyes catch your stare and he grins at you putting Valerie down. You bite into your bottom lip as he fixes his shirt waving in your way.

“Oh shit, I think Val is about to throw dirt at Aunt Monica, gotta stop her,” Rosa snaps seeing her daughter grab a handful of dirt and heading in your aunt’s direction.

You just chuckle as Harry walks up to you, arms curling around your waist as he steals a quick kiss.

“Saw you staring with those pretty eyes, babe,” he teases you as you place your hands on his biceps.

“I’m not sorry. I like looking at what’s mine.” He grins shaking his head at you before kissing you once more. “I love seeing you with Val,” you admit smiling up at him.

“Yeah?”

“Mhm, you’re really good with her.”

He nods and stays silent for a little as you slide your hands up to his shoulders, tilting your head to the side.

“Just wait until you see me with our babies,” he shyly mumbles, but it surely makes your heart skip a beat. You’d be lying if you said you haven’t thought about having babies with Harry, but hearing it from his mouth just hits differently.

“So you’re thinking about babies already?” you tease him smirking.

“I mean… we surely practice the baby making quite a lot,” he jokes and you smack his chest playfully for the dirty joke, but you laugh with him. “I wouldn’t mind if it was our babyshower already,” he admits with a shy smile.

“You know, there’s an order for things, and baby making is not up next,” you tell him pointing a finger at him.

“Yeah? What is then?” he grins knowingly, just wanting to make you say it. But instead, you just hold up your hand and wiggle your empty fingers. “Oh, I wouldn’t have figured, not with all the hints your mom has been dropping,” he chuckles.

“She’s just excited!” you defend her.

“Mhm, and what about you? Are you excited?”

“Is this your attempt at trying to figure out if I would say yes?”

“Maybe, I’m not confirming anything,” he cheekily smiles, pressing a kiss to your forehead. “So? Hypothetically, if I were to pop the question in the near future, what would you say?”

“Well, hypothetically, I think I would say yes,” you say, a wide smile spreading across his ridiculously handsome face. “But you know, reality would be different, so, you have to really ask the question to find out,” you add trying to look unbothered, but you start laughing as he digs his fingers into your side.

“Alright, alright. I got the hint,” he chuckles leaning down as he kisses you. “Don’t worry. I got it all under control.”

“Oh, I don’t worry. I know you too well, Harry Styles. All too well!” you tease him.

“And you love me for everything you know about me, am I right?” he grins proudly. You think about teasing him a little more, but you can never lie about how much you love him. It’s just impossible to deny it, even if it’s just a joke.

So taking a deep breath you just smile up at him nodding.

“Of course,” you tell him, pecking his lips shortly. His hand  finds yours and brings it up between the two of you, brushing his thumb over your naked fingers, a satisfied grin pulling on his lips.

Looking into your eyes he doesn’t say anything, just kisses the place where one day a ring will sit and it’s like a silent agreement that your finger won’t stay empty too long.

And oh boy, you were right! Because just three short weeks later, when the two of you are hiking at a breathtaking scenery on your weekend getaway, Harry gets down on one knee. You gasp even though he made it clear it’s gonna happen soon, but the fact that he did it exactly the way he told Aunt Monica, at a gorgeous lookout on a hill, just warms your heart. He smiles up at you, nervousness glistening in his eyes as he asks that one question, popping the lid of the small velvety box open, revealing the ring.

“Will you marry me?”

You choke out, not able to contain your feelings as you throw yourself into his arms chanting yes, yes, yes! continuously to him.

PROLOGUE

A pair of tiny feet are tapping on the white tiles, following behind the bigger ones, slaloming between the patients, the set of balloons floating behind them as they run down the hallway like crazy. An old lady looks down at the little girl with a sweet smile and she waves at her before running after her mommy, not wanting to lose her.

“Come on, it’s right there!” Rosa cheers as she grabs Valerie’s hand once they reach the right hallway. She leaps excitedly, a nervous, but happy giggle leaving her lips, eyes snapping up at the blue balloons in her mother’s hands. She is mesmerized by them, though she knows she can’t keep them. They are for someone else. Someone special. 

“Are we there?” she asks when they stop at a closed door as Rosa checks her phone to see if she remembered the number of the room correct.

“Yes, we are!” she squeals happily before turning to her daughter. “Val, remember what we talked about?”

The little girl nods proudly, bringing a finger to her lips as she thinks back to the conversation she had with Rosa earlier.

“Yes. He is very tiny and I need to be gentle with him!” she repeats her mother’s words and Rosa smiles down at her proudly.

“Yes, baby. Very good. Now come on, let’s meet baby Finn!” she cheers in excitement as the two of them walk up to the door and Rosa knocks on the door gently, not wanting to disturb if someone is sleeping in there.

Valerie is standing next to her leg, one hand holding onto the fabric of her jeans, while the other one reaches to the lock that fell into her face. She nervously curls it around her finger, fidgeting with it as she patiently waits, just like her mommy taught her.

The door opens and Harry’s wide grin welcomes the two of them, Valerie immediately mirroring his expression as she sees her godfather.

“Hey princess!” he greets her, picking her up into his arms without hesitation. “Come on in,” he invites Rosa in and she can barely hold her excitement when she sees you sitting on the hospital bed in that awfully familiar and ugly gown, a little bundle of joy in your arms, so wrapped up she can’t even see his face. 

Your tired eyes tear away from the baby in your arms and they meet Rosa’s glossy gaze. She drops the balloons next to the door, carelessly abandoning them as she feels her heart beat faster in her chest once her eyes finally lay on the face of the new addition of the family.

“Hey! How are you?!” she breathes out walking closer, pulling a chair to sit beside you. You glance down at baby Finn, still unable to truly express how you really feel about becoming a mom. 

Taking a deep breath you look up at Harry who is already staring at you, that special shine of pride still so obvious in his green eyes, you just wish you could see him so happy and joyful every day for the rest of your life. He shoots you a warm smile before turning to Valerie, who is fumbling with his necklace on his chest.

“I’m tired, but so happy, Rosa,” you breathe out and she chuckles nodding, fully understanding the feeling. If there is anyone, that’s her who knows exactly what it’s like to hold your baby in your arms for the first time. 

“He is so beautiful, those cheeks, oh my God!” she whispers leaning a little closer to see the sleeping baby boy better. He is nestled in his mom’s arms, already deep in his first big sleep on this world before he starts to explore it. “I gotta say, he looks a lot like Harry,” she admits looking over at the happy dad who tries to push down a grin while you roll your eyes at the statement.

“So unfair! Cooked him inside me for nine months, then pushed him out my cooch, and he has the audacity to look like his father!” you dramatically say, but there’s a small smile playing on your lips. 

You can’t be mad at him. If something, you really hope he’ll turn out to be just like his daddy, because that man has you whipped even after years of being together. 

“Give him a few months and he might morph into your little version,” Rosa chuckles. 

“Val, you ready to meet your cousin?” Harry asks the little girl in his arms who nods vigorously.

“Cousin!” she cheers throwing her hands into the air. 

“Remember what we talked about! Be gentle!” Rosa warns her again as Harry walks closer, sitting to the edge of your bed as you sit up straight, bringing Finn closer so she can see.

She patiently sits on Harry’s lap, hands curled together at her stomach as she peeks at the sleeping baby, her curious eyes taking in his features.

“Sleeping?” she asks glancing up at you.

“Yes, he is very tired now,” you nod smiling. 

All three of you watch her stare at the baby as if he was a magical creature, but to her, he is. If you are being honest, he is one for all of you. You still hadn’t wrapped your head around the fact that he is here.

“So? What do you think?” Harry asks, giving her a little squeeze when she’s been quiet for some time.

“Can I kiss him?” she asks, melting all three of you with the request.

“Of course you can!” you tell her and push yourself a little forward so she can reach him. Valerie leans down and places a soft, lingering kiss to Finn’s forehead that’s not covered by the little blue hat on his head. 

Your eyes snap up to Harry and you see that his eyes are tearing up again, something that’s been happening continuously since he first saw his son hours earlier. He is clearly obsessed with not just Finn, but the whole idea of being a father, you figured he has been for quite some time. The way he treated Val like she was his own never failed to melt your heart and push you a step closer to the idea of having a baby with him one day. That day finally came and you can tell he is on cloud nine.

“Want to know a secret?” you ask Valerie with a small smirk. She nods, eyes lighting up. She is such a nosy little girl! “If you weren’t born, baby Finn wouldn’t be here today.”

Rosa looks at you with tears in her eyes as she processes your words. Not that it’s anything new, but she always cracks up thinking about the fact that Valerie was the reason why you and Harry got together in the first place.

“Really? I did it?” she asks looking at her mother, probably not really knowing what it means exactly, but she gets the essence of it.

“Yes,” you chuckle. “You did it.”

“He’ll need a lot of help, Val. Do you want to be his best friend?” Harry asks looking down at the little girl.

“I am his best friend!” she confidently says and you chuckle feeling your heart just overflowing with the love you’ve been experiencing. 

“Good, he already loves you so much, Val. I know it,” Harry smiles hugging her to his chest as she cuddles to him happily. 

You look at Valerie as she mindlessly starts telling about something that happened at the playground the other day and he listens to her like she was telling him the meaning of life, giving her his full attention. The stupid smile can’t be wiped from your face as you look at the two of them, the memory of being in a hospital room with both of them still vivid in your mind. 

It still blows your mind how far you’ve come from biting each other’s head off to being married and having a baby, but you wouldn’t have it any other way. If you ended up here, you’d go through the whole chaos with him again without a second thought. He is everything to you and now you are tied together forever, thanks to all higher forces that brought you to this very point in life. 

Harry looks at you while Valerie is still talking and Rosa is busy admiring Finn. He smiles at you again before mouthing the words ‘I love you!’, making your heart flutter like it’s the first time you heard him say it though he has said those words to you every day since then, making sure you don’t forget how hopelessly in love he is with you. 

“I love you too,” you whisper back before your eyes return to the sleeping baby in your arms. “And I love you too.”

PREVIOUS PART

A/N: oh my! i really can’t believe it ended! thank you so much for sticking with me for this series, im really proud of this one and it’s probably one of my favs i’ve ever written! thank you for supporting my writing and i hope you enjoyed this series as much as i enjoyed writing it! pls feel free to share your thoughts with me about the chapter or the whole series itself, i would LOVE to read your reactions and comments! and i hope you’ll find my upcoming works just as endearing as Valerie was!!

TAGLIST

let me know if you’d like to be added or taken off!

@f-vasquezp​ @perspnhel​ @http-cherries​  @h-arrystyles​ @just-damn-bored​ @millennial-teenybopper​ @sarcasticallywitty15​ @gwenlovesharrystyles​ @perfectywrong​ @do-youseeme​ @burberryharold​  @irwindoll​ @stylesfics-xx​ @sltwins​ @mellamolayla​ @funeral-7​  @yourkidsfavbabysitter​ @nesiamenick​ @sunflower6why​ @rainbowbutterflyboy​

[sicjimin]

omg !!!! your taekook fic was the best in the world !!! an idea if you accept suggestions hehe could be kook dealing with a very bad flu that does not let him eat or makes him nauseated and tae super worried as always

A.N : aaaaaa thank u somuch for liking it !! andd since we're still in jungkook's day here we go ~ short and sweet sick preg!jungkook with taehyung ... i hope u like it and does justice to ur expectations ! :D thank u for the idea as well its adorable TT

TW : emeto, mpreg

At first, Taehyung thought it was usual morning sickness—when he woke up and his side was cold and not long after he heard someone retching from the bathroom. He stretches his body, trying to collect his soul before he slides into his slippers and walks to the bathroom. He could still hear Jungkook vomiting from inside. The sound of vomit filling the bowl is loud against the silent night.

He knocks on the door. "Kookie?”

When Jungkook doesn’t answer him, he pushes the door open slowly and finds the younger boy slumped over the toilet. His stomach seems empty but he didn't look like he'd stop anytime soon. Jungkook's face looks flushed and feverish while holding a wet towel. It looks like he's been sick for some time now.

Taehyung takes the towel away from Jungkook and wipes his face with it. It feels cold against his skin, which was hot just moments ago.

" Hyungie ..", Jungkook croakes out. Spitting thick saliva and wipes his lips before he let his body slumped against the younger.

Jungkook’s eyes are glassy and he is sweating profusely despite having just woken up.

"How long have you been here?"

"Dunno ...", Jungkook mumbles, voice shaky. " Hyung .. i feel dizzy"

Taehyung nods as he pulls Jungkook closer to him, rubbing his back softly, "Maybe it was because you just throwing up baby, are you done?"

Jungkook only mustered a low hum, too tired to open his mouth further without wanting to gag.

Taehyung flushed the toilet, and slides his hand on Jungkook's waist, securing it as he guides the younger back to bed. Jungkook was already out the moment his body touched the sheets. His expression scrunched, like he holding back pain. Taehyung tucked him and retreat to the kitchen, preparing his anti-emetic medicine from their doctor, crackers, and tea for his boyfriend when he wakes up.

"Hyungie ..", he heard Jungkook's weak voice from the bedroom when he returns to their room. Stretching his arms, waiting for the older to join him in the bed and snuggle close to him. Jungkook looks so small, drowning in Taehyung's hoodie.

" I'm here baby, let's sleep again", Taehyung whispers soothingly as he wraps an arm around the younger. And Jungkook nods, closes his eyes immediately.

Taehyung kissed the top of the younger’s head and places another kiss on his forehead. He watches him sleeping peacefully before pulling the blanket higher over Jungkook.

🌡🌡🌡

He didn't remember how long since they drifted off to sleep, but he wakes up with someone shaking his body urgently.

"Taehyung ... hyung!", Jungkook calls out frantically, tears glistening from his eyes, the result of him holding back the urge to vomiting again. " Hyung- hmmpph", his stomach lurch. He clamped his mouth, breathing heavily as one of his hands still trying to waking up the older.

"Kook? What is it?", Taehyung finally opens his eyes, confused.

His mind felt foggy, but its wide awake the moment he registered the younger's state in front of him.

" Kook? Are you okay? What's wrong?", Taehyung sits up straight.

The younger was hunched over and clutching his stomach with one hand and other to clamped his mouth.

"Want to puke..", Jungkook chokes out. " But i'm too dizzy to move—", he stutters before a wet gag wracking his body.

"Hyung ..", Jungkook cries out as he feels warm liquid shooting up to his throat. He didn't want to make a mess on the bed but the whole room is tilting in his vision. He's sure if he tried to run he would faint.

Taehyung hurriedly grabs the nearest bin and placed it in front of his boyfriend, that immediately hunched over it, gurgling up his stomach content.

Taehyung rubs the younger's back, trying to comfort the latter as much as possible while Jungkook heaved.

"Taeh-uuurrkk", Jungkook retched, brown liquid spurting from his mouth, coating tissue and stash of snacks inside the bin.

" Oh gosh, some of it got into your hair, baby", Taehyung murmurs, his hand moving to grab the latter hair back and hold it back. "Let it out, Kook-ah. You'll feel better soon", he adds, rubbing his boyfriend's back and shoulders with one hand.

" Uurrkk-", Jungkook continues to vomit, his body convulsing with nausea. "Hyunggg—" he moans, lifting his head from the bin to catch the fresh air. The smell of his stomach content didnt helps his nausea at all.

Taehyung can see the sweat running down Jungkook's neck and his cheeks flushed red with every passing second, contrasting with his pale face.

"I'm here baby ..", Taehyung murmurs, kissing the top of Jungkook's head. He runs his fingers through the other sweaty hair gently.

" I feel horrible", Jungkook whines, before he groans as his stomach twist once more, sending him back to the bin with a mouthful of vomit plopping from his lips.

He keeps vomiting until nothing comes out. Taehyung holds him tightly in his lap. He strokes the younger's hair and presses kisses on his temples, forehead and cheeks until he calmed down, exhausted and panting.

"You alright?", Taehyung asks, brushing off stray hairs from his face. "Better?"

Jungkook shakes his head no, "Everything hurts hyungie ..", he says, leaning his head forward and resting it on Taehyung's shoulder. His hand curling protectively over his bump, rubbing it lightly hoping that it would stop sloshing nausea.

"I know baby, i'm sorry you feel bad", Taehyung coos. "Can you take your medicine? The one that they gave you if you have bad morning sickness?", he asks, placing a hand behind the younger's head to pull him closer.

Jungkook nods, feeling lethargic and exhausted as well as nauseous.

Taehyung scoots away, placing the bin next to their bed for him to clean later, and grabs the tea along with medicine.

" Here" Taehyung holds them both out to him. Jungkook takes one medicine at the same time with the help of tea before lying back down, letting the pill settle in his stomach before Taehyung tucks him in again.

"Rest up baby, i hope you feel better once you wake up", he mutters. " Do you want anything to eat later?"

"Mhm .. pancake?" Jungkook mumbles out sleepily, blinking lazily at Taehyung.

"Okay babe, wait until your feeling better then". Taehyung kisses his temple and squeezes the younger's hand tightly between his own. The young boy smiles before he yawns loudly before closing his eyes.

🌡🌡🌡

To say Taehyung is panicking is an understatement. He was in a double panic, as he for the fourth time today rubbing Jungkook's back as his boyfriend hunched over the toilet and throwing his food up.

" Hyung .. this is not morning sickness", Jungkook mumbles weakly when his stomach gave him a break. He sniffles as he looks at the murky water below him, his half-digested pancake had morphed into a chunky mess.

"I know i know baby. I think you caught a bug. You're growing fever", Taehyung replies, combing through the younger's bangs, wiping his face clean of drool and spit. The boy shivers, feeling slightly sick, still a bit nauseous.

" Am i?", Jungkook questioned, letting his head rest against the cold porcelain. Ignoring how gross it might be. It's cold. It feels nice. He groans when Taehyung takes his head away, and letting it rest on the older chest. "You are burning up"

"Mhm", he hums tiredly, "That explains how horrible i felt ..", Jungkook mutters lowly as he nuzzled his nose onto Taehyung's shirt.

" But our baby will be alright .. right hyungie? i feel sorry because i can't keep anything down .. the baby must be hungry", Jungkook mumbles , squeezing Taehyung's shirt as tight as possible.

Taehyung's heart clenched at the sight. It's broken even more when he feels warm liquid seeping on Jungkook's cheeks. He didn't know if it's because of his feverish state or his pregnancy hormone messing things up, but he hates looking at his cheerful boyfriend as weak and vulnerable like this and he only can help much.

"They will be fine baby. Now lets get you rested again, okay? We can try to eat a little. Baby step. Are you done here?", Taehyung sighs softly, hugging Jungkook to his chest.

"No.. still want to puke—huuurghh-", Jungkook croaks out after gulping a few times, and propped himself up just in time as water and bile spraying from his pale lips.

He lets out another whimper, and throws up one last time before emptying what little remains in his stomach into the bowl.

Taehyung rubs the boy's back soothingly.

" Hyungiee .. i feel gross .. and sick ...", Jungkook whines.

"I know baby .. you will feel better soon", Taehyung answers as he tucked his boyfriend back in.

"If you're not getting any better tomorrow, we're going to the doctor, okay?", Taehyung whispers.

" Hmhmm.. okay hyungie", Jungkook mumbles. He closed his eyes and snuggled closer to Taehyung's chest. He feels really warm and sleepy, as a side effect of all that vomiting.

Taehyung sighs when Jungkook's breathing has become steady in and out. He fishes his phone up and walks outside slowly, before pacing around, waiting for the other line to pick his calls, "Jin hyung!!", he almost shouts, relief rushing through his blood when his hyung pick up, "Help me, Jungkook is sick he keeps vomiting and i dont know he seems so weak and cant keep anything down i dont—"

"Taehyung-ah .. breathe ..", Seokjin interrupts with worry laced in his tone.

"I just need something to help him!", Taehyung exclaims, holding the phone to his ear, desperate. " I dont know what to do hyung ... what should i do?"

[catneylang]

heyhey, i just got to the part of battle tendency where caesar Fucking Dies and cried so hard i wheezed However. however. i already knew a lot about caejose beforehand and i love them somuch, i just don't know how well of a grip i have on them? in the anime we get like 2 interactions and idk shit hurts, its hard for me to put together... since ur the ceo i thought id ask your take on them, i love all your content for these boys, frfr

aanfndnnfdn CEO OF CAEJOSE I DO NOT DESERVE THAT TITLE ,, but thank u omg

and hmm...I would go back and do a rewatch of battle tendency. I felt the same way when I first watched battle tendency, felt as if they didnt have many interactions. But if you go back and really watch how the two interact, I think it will be extremely fulfilling. In both the manga and anime we really see them both grow to respect each other, despite all the competitiveness between them. I think they definitely express their feelings for the other more through actions rather than words - especially caesar.

Romantic or Platonic, I think those two really grow close (unfortunately we dont get to see their training days, which we were ROBBED of seeing animated) and once you really start to dive into fandom cj content, you'll appreciate their canon interactions even more!

[moonraccoon-exe]

Hey Coonie, how are you? Hope those surgery wounds are all healed and not bothering you as much. Don't know how long it takes. I am feeling better, had a nice weekend with my family. My sleep is mostly back to normal. I have not much to tell, just wanted to hear from you again, how you've been. Saw that post about your crush and I hope you'll find someone as nice as him who loves you too. -Peridot

PERIDOT BUDDY!!!!!!!!!!!!

*CLINGS TO YOUR HEAD*

PERIDOT BUDDY, HELLO, I AM SOOOOOOOOO HAPPY TO SEE YOU DROP BY AND SO HAPPY TO HEAR FROM YOU AGAIN AND HASDNDF HELLO BUDDY HOW ARE YOU AW I’VE MISSED YOU!! 

Heya, Peridot, buddy!! I-  

*cries*

HI PERIDOT I MISSED YOU! ;A;

I was just considering for the past 2 or so days about saying hi and see if you were around but I procrastinated and didn’t get around to doing it. You were faster than me, hm! :)

Did you see my last response to you? I posted it again so that it didn’t appear in the dash but it should have appeared in my blog. Hopefully you did! I can reblog it so you can find it moreeasily, or maybe it’ll pop up if you search for Peridot in my blog? :)

A-ah, thanks for the good wishes about my wounds! They’re just very itchy at times, but they’ve healed on the outside! Still have to wait for what remains of the…what you call them…crusts! to fall down, so that’s why they itch, but they’re not really a bother. I’m healing greatly!! Thank you loads, Peridot :)

It’s not a giant answer but I’ll add a Read More, alright buddy? Hope it doesn’t bother you ^^

:’)

Ah, Peridot. You have no idea how happy it makes me to know you’re doing better and that you had a nice weekend with your family. I know it’s been difficult for you, and I don’t doubt you’ve still got some struggles now and then, but I’m very proud of you for staying strong despite it all and for making it through. What you went through is not something you just get over so easily, so it makes me very happy to see that you’re not staying stuck there either and that you’re keeping on. 

I’m very happy you’re feeling better. I knew you’d feel like that again, just didn’t know how long it’d take you. I’m happy we’re there now. I’ll be standing here continuing to think about you and sending the most magical raccoon vibes so that you have good days like this weekend you had. You’re better than you were yesterday, and a bit worse than you’ll be tomorrow. It only means you’ll keep feeling better and better with each day, buddy. I know, and I hope so :)

Also happy to know your sleep is back to normal!! Sleep is important and it always makes me happy to know when you have some improvement regarding that. I know your sleep can give you troubles at times, especially with the recent events and whatnot. So it makes me happy to know this, really. Still gonna keep sending those magical moon vibes so that your nights are calm and restful. :3

You don’t need to have something to tell me, Peridot, buddy! You could say hi and tell me what you had for breakfast, and I’d still be super happy and bouncy to hear from you. :3

A-ah, I’m doing good, thank you! Sorta itchy on the wounds, but I’m doing great! Got my puppy with me, I can walk around without getting exhausted immediately, there’s food in the fridge, and I feel I’m improving at school! Everything’s going good. Thank you loads for asking, buddy :’3

A-AH, THAT GUY AH, UHM, HNGNH…. (⁄ ⁄•⁄ω⁄•⁄ ⁄)

I-I THINK...MAYBE LAST NIGHT I WAS A BIT TOO EXCITED... (⁄ ⁄•⁄ω⁄•⁄ ⁄)

I-I don’t know if- hfnnggndh aah. (⁄ ⁄•⁄ω⁄•⁄ ⁄)

(⁄ ⁄•⁄ω⁄•⁄ ⁄)

Now I just don’t know what to say, Peridot!! I AM SO EMBARRASSED ASDKJLKSJ AHAHAH! (*ﾉ▽ﾉ)

A crush. HOW EMBARRASSING  (*ﾉωﾉ)

I really am not troubled regarding the romantic things. I’ve always thought that if I ever have a partner, cool! And if not, cool! It’s not really something I chase after, or something I’m too interested in. But the thought of someone as nice as him is very nice....I mean, he really is a good person. He’s kind and sort of shy and sort of awkward and a bit of a dork. MY ABSOLUTE TYPE LMAO

But he’s really nice and I think that that’s what matters. He’s- sort of- he-    ./////.   He’s the kind to go to the gym, apparently, and we’re- aHFNDKGDF- we’re so used to that sort of guys being sort of douches, but he’s actually really nice. He’s friendly and good. So far I know, of course! We don’t- talk very often so I wouldn’t say 100% for sure! But so far, what little of interaction we’ve had, he’s always been good and kind to me. Which I think is what matters most.

I AM RANTING SOMUCH I’M SORRY PERIDOT I GOT CARRIED AWYA SDJHDSBFD AGHUDWA Y DNF (⁄ ⁄•⁄ω⁄•⁄ ⁄)

i jsT I JUST MEAN TO SAY

I just mean to say, thank you, Peridot... (⁄ ⁄•⁄ω⁄•⁄ ⁄)

I dn’t know if I’m currently interested in a partner or not, or if I’ll find someone as nice as him (not because there aren’t nice people, I just rarely go out of the social circles I already have), but I thank you loads for the thought and the wishes, and the intention in them. 

Thank you for being so sweet as always, buddy. You’re always so nice to me too, and always wish the best for me, and I still don’t know how to thank you for all that kindness and all that good that you wish to me. 

May you receive 3 times as you wish for me, Peridot. 

Anyway, thank you so much for dropping by! I was missing you already and wondering how you were doing. I’m very happy to know you’re feeling better, and that your situation is generally improving. (˙︶˙)

As always, know that I’m here if you want to say anything or if you need anything, buddy. You don’t need to say anything if you don’t want to, as much as you can drop by saying anything you want if you want to. Just do as you feel like doing, alright, buddy?

Thank you thank you thank you for dropping by. Your presence always feels like a hug, whether it’s giving or receiving it, and that’s always warm! 

It was INCREDIBLE to hear from you again, buddy, and beautiful that besides hearing from you, what I hear are good news. ♡

Thank you as well for asking about my wounds, and thank you for the good wishes regarding my feelings! :3

Thank you for dropping by with your wonderful presence. You feel sort of a soft blue right now; not entirely bouncy or on full energy, but not in darkness anymore. I’m absolutely content and happy to feel you that way. 

Here’s to continue sending you more happy coon thoughts and vibes, and keeping you in mind, buddy! 

I hope you’re having a FANTASTIC evening, and that you’ll have incredible days up ahead! Lots of hugs from this raccoonie! (ɔˆз(ˆ⌣ˆc)

[theycallmebecca]

So I somehow missed the orig prompt challenge post. If it’s not to much trouble could I get reader x Chris (read can be S.O. ie wife, GF or fiancé your choice) where she comes home with a couples (family) costume for them (and Dodger) to go to a family Halloween party. So just to clarify Dodger gets a costume too. I imagine Chris would get a kick out of it. Thanks In advance.

Happy Halloween my loves!!! I hope you all have a fantastic day! In preparation for this drabble, I did some searching for a couple with a dog costume and I found an adorable one that also featured a baby… and well.. I know you bitches are suckers for Chris, Dodger and Chris being a dad… so…

This is a short drabble, but the last drabble is a long smutty one….

Title: Winnie the Pooh and Friends

Pairing: Chris Evans x reader

Rating: G

Warnings: n/a

Disclaimer: This work of fiction is not to be reposted, used or translated without my permission.

Promptober Announcement & Promptlist | Promptober Masterlist

The house was quiet when you came in and you couldn’t help but smile. The baby had been upset all morning and Chris, knowing you needed a break, had sent you out to find Halloween costumes for his mom’s annual Halloween party. Clearly, your husband had managed to get the situation under control; no doubt under the watchful eye of Dodger, the self-proclaimed protector of the newest member of the family.

It was Dodger who came to find out who’d arrived and, with a happily wagging tail, he led you up to the bedroom where you found Chris fast asleep with his three-week-old daughter fast asleep on his bare chest. You set the bags from the store on the bench at the end of the bed, kicked your shoes off and then joined them on the bed. Dodger followed you and curled up with his head on your hip.

The baby’s cries woke you all up a little later and, while you fed her, Chris dug through the bag of goodies you’d brought home.

“Let me guess, I’m dressing up as Tigger?” Chris asked as he took the Tigger costume from the bag.

“Yes,” you replied. “There weren’t a lot of options, since Halloween is, well, today…” In fact, you were going to have to get creative with yours, the baby’s and Dodger’s costumes. You’d found the Tigger costume, but to complete the Winnie the Pooh theme, you were going to have to make the others. “I’m going to be Winnie the Pooh, baby girl is going to be Piglet and Dodger is going to be Eeyore.”

After the baby finished eating, Chris offered to get her back to sleep while you started working on the costumes. You carried the bag down to the kitchen and spread out your supplies on the table. Armed with a pair of scissors and a glue gun, you got to work and completed the costumes in the short window in between feedings.

Later that evening, you, Chris, baby girl and Dodger were the highlight of his mom’s Halloween party. You knew it was because there were people who hadn’t seen the baby yet and not, purely, because of your costumes, but people had cooed over those as well.

Prompting is now closed. Thank you to everyone who has submitted a prompt (or more)!

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Tag list: @capcevans81, @ohmysweetlove, @princess-evans-addict, @katiew1973, @anionthewrite, @heather-lynn, @mycapt-ohcapt, @ilovethings-somuch, @pegasusdragontiger, @mrsamericaevans, @societalfailure, @smoothdogsgirl, @sian22redux, @tvjunkie08, @aclutteredheadspace

[elwintersoldado]

about me?

I was tagged by @ilovethings-somuch 😱  thanks looooovely!

RULES: answer these 85 statements and tag people

THE LAST:

drink:  water

phone call: mom

text message: “feels like i’m riding a horse”

song you listened to: dangerous woman by ariana grande

time you cried: a while ago lol 

dated someone twice: no?

kissed someone and regretted it: no, actually haha

been cheated on: no

lost someone special: of course

been depressed: i’ve got the meds and paperwork to prove it

gotten drunk and thrown up: NO. 

FAVOURITE COLOURS:

Black

Burgundy

Navy Blue

IN THE LAST YEAR HAVE YOU:

made new friends: yes?

fallen out of love: no

laughed until you cried: i actually have!!!!!

found out someone was talking about you: no

met someone who changed you: ..... no

found out who your friends are: nope

kissed someone on your facebook list: god no

GENERAL:

how many of your facebook friends do you know in real life: like 99.9% of them because the majority are family/friends

do you have any pets:  yes! 2 dogs, which i constantly post pictures of lol

do you want to change your name: not anymore lol

what did you do for your last birthday: like last year’s birthday???? um nothing that i can remember bc we had just welcomed a new baby to the family lmao

what time did you wake up: 10AM. (for the first time in a long time i actually slept in)

what were you doing at midnight last night: sleeping???

name something you can’t wait for: HALLOWEEN!!!!!

when was the last time you saw your mom: tuesday night.

what are you listening to right now: nothing??? i mean, other than like planes flying overhead.

have you ever talked to a person named tom: agh, no.

something that is getting on your nerves: just rude/mean people in general. like.... why???????

most visited website: defo this hell hole

haircolour: natural? dark brown. atm? fucking some ombre shit. i just blonde in it lol

long or short hair: short, my friends.

do you have a crush on someone: in real life? no.

what do you like about yourself: oh god......

want any piercings: i want some more on my ears

blood type: idk.... but i should probably know..

nickname:  i don’t have one :(

relationship status: single and i could care fucking less

zodiac: pisces

pronouns: she/her

favorite tv show: right now, it’s Game of Thrones

tattoos: no. i’m too indecisive. 

right or left handed: right

surgery: no

piercing: one on each ear and my very impulsive belly button piercing 

sport: uhhhhhhhh american football??? boxing???? sometimes baseball???

vacation: i ! wanna ! go ! to ! europe !

pair of trainers: i only have one pair of nike’s lmao

MORE GENERAL:

eating: nothing

drinking: nothing

im about to: take a shower

waiting for: my harry styles concert!!!!!!!

want: a new job lol

get married: ughhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh

career: i’m not even in school anymore so that should answer this

WHICH IS BETTER:

hugs or kisses: hugs, i guess. 

lips or eyes: eyes

shorter or taller: taller

older or younger: older

nice arms or nice stomach: 🙄

hook up or relationship: at this point, a hookup would be fun

troublemaker or hesitant: troublemaker 

HAVE YOU EVER:

kissed a stranger: mmmmm no

drank hard liquor: not yet

lost glasses/contact lenses: i used to lose my glasses ALL the time. picture me as velma from scooby doo. 

turned someone down: pfffffft

sex on the first date: no

broken someone’s heart: not that i know of???

had your heart broken: ugh, no.

been arrested: no... but i have gotten in trouble with the police.... (I WAS IN HIGH SCHOOL AND IT WAS STUPID. If you want to know, ask lol)

cried when someone died: yeah

fallen for a friend: nope

DO YOU BELIEVE IN

yourself: ugh

miracles: ugh

love at first sight: ugh

Santa Claus: no. i was like 7 when i found out so....

kiss on the first date: sure why not

angels: ugh

OTHER:

current best friends name: i’ll just use the letter’s of their first names - M & C

eyecolour: brown. 

favorite movie: of all time? the wizard of oz. atm? IT.

let’s seeeee. i taaaaag: @aelin-blackstairs @asirenscalling @whothehellisbella @poe-also-bucky @fuckmewintertucker @hollycornish @rachelle-on-the-run @sebanstianstan @buckyappreciationsociety @fifth-harmony

[pegasusdragontiger]

TAG GAME: AlphaMe

Rules: Copy this post into a new text post, remove my answers and put in yours, and when you are done tag up to 10 people and also tag the person who tagged you… And most importantly, have fun!

Thank you darling for tagging me! @celeb-fess 

a - age: 29 omg getting close the 30! holy shit

b - biggest fear: Oh god never being good enough or worthy! Never finding that special someone to love me for me.

c - current time: 8.13 AM 

d - drink you last had: Apple Cider 

e - every day starts with: Cleansing my face!

f - favourite song: right now? Way Down We Go by Kaleo and Believer by Imagine Dragons so a tie at the moment. 

g - ghosts, are they real: I would say yes as every time I get the urge to play the piano it sounds like someone is singing near me and freaks me out when I am home alone!

h - hometown: Well I live in a quite suburb but as my sis tells me who is a cop and say’s bikies are moving into the area well that fkn great! Anyway Greystanes which is 20 or so mins from Parramatta and 10-15 mins from Merrylands which are other suburbs that have major shopping centers in NSW Sydney Australia.  i - in love with: Lol do I have to choose single at the moment but crushing hard on Chris Evans like who isn’t?

j - jealous of: POthers when I know I shouldn’t be as their life might be shtter than my own but your mind can’t help but think they have the perfect life and mine is just a pile of shit!

k - killed someone: Fk to the NO! and never want to.

l - last time you cried: Listening to all 3 Albums of Adele plus Skyfall. She really knows how to speak to me! Oh and Guardians Of The Galaxy Vol 2 omfg cried like a bloody baby!

m - middle name: Marie!! I love and adore my middle name and hateish my First name, French spelling and it sound so pretty. 

n - number of siblings: 3, Older sis, then Brother and then Sis who is 4 yreas older! we can kind of have a very toxic relationship from time to time and when we argue it is like world wars, funny thing is that my sis aren’t talking to my bro after like a major bust up, so me and my parents have to see my sis and her family one day and see my bro on another!

o - one wish: For us all to get along, But to also find my other half to my soul, finding that love that is never ending and having a family!

p - person you last called/texted: ohh My bestie Crystal to vent to her about some fkd up shit that happened to me last week. but I won’t to say if I could call and text this person I would- @littleplebe she is like a life line and get’s me to a T, but also we are like Pinky and the Brain we could plot to rule the world and I think we could do it??! lol <3<3

q - questions you’re always asked: When are you getting married?, when are you having kids?, when are you getting your license? 

r - reasons to smile: @littleplebe @theycallmebecca @senselesssamii and so many others!

s - song last sang: Don’t You Remember by Adele

t - time you woke up: 5 something AM 

u - underwear colour: Black

v - vacation destination: Would love to go back too NZ but dream of Paris!

w - worst habit: I stress and worry a lot, and when that happens I eat Nutella!

x - x-rays you’ve had: 7 knees!, thumb, pink, lower back

y - your favourite food: Steak and Guinness Pie!

z - zodiac sign: Taurus of course <3 <3 Also born in the year of the DRAGON! WOOt!

I tag @littleplebe @theycallmebecca @ilovethings-somuch @mcgregorswench @dresupi @hollyspacey @holdmecloseandfast @wahwahwaffles @phoenix-173 @cinnaatheart

[calumsbaby-blog]

Ruined Us pt.3

A/N Hey loves, part three is here and I hope you enjoy it. Remember I take requests and I’ll gladly do imagines or blurbs for you. Enjoy <3

I slowly walked up to the door of boys house, a place I've grown accustomed to but now it feels as if I've never entered through this door. I'm very hesitant to knock on the mahogany door, but once I mustered up the courage the door swings open revealing a blonde Micheal.

“Mel!” He yells, wrapping his arms around me in a warm embrace. I lightly pat him on the back, a little anxious about the situation but I'll pull through.

“Hi Mikey.” I say plastering a smile on my face after he pulls away from me. I can see Luke and Ashton behind him with wide smiles. Micheal steps out of my way and Ashton runs up to me and pulls me farther into the room while Luke rushes to Ramona mentioning something about new guitars.

“He's in his room.” Ashton whispers as if he were afraid the others would come with us.

“Thank you.” I reply before descending up the stairs to Calum's room. I stand at the front of his door for a couple of minutes debating whether I should knock or just come right in, I end up knocking earning a small ‘come in’ for my answer.

I slowly walk in and close the door behind me, and stand there for a minute staring at the boy I love, his almond brown eyes were puffy and red as if he'd been crying for quite a while. His nose was a tad red as well, and his cheeks that I always loved squishing before kissing him were tear stained. We stare at each other for a couple of seconds before Calum ended up breaking the silence between us.

“Hey.” He sniffles before looking back down at his pillow, he pat the spot next to him but I took a seat at the edge of his bed. I honestly don't know what to say to him. Do I yell, do I cry? “How are you doing?” He asked, his voice seemed bored but when I looked into those brown eyes you could tell that the question kept him up at night.

“Do not ask me that question.” I replied now feeling the tears build up in my eyes. I tried to blink them away but they ended up falling upon my cheeks, I quickly averted my eyes down in my lap my hair shielding my face as I let the tears fall.

“Why can't I?” Calum asks, I feel the bed dip in front of me. He probably scooted closer to me, I look up to see the Maori boy his eyebrows furrowed and eyes full of hurt. I quickly swipe away the fresh tears from my cheeks and look at him straight in the eye. A sudden fire inside of me sparking.

“You can't ask a person is doing right after tearing them apart Calum. You have no right.” I snapped. His eyes widened at my sudden change of attitude, but that was only the start. “You ruined me Calum. You took every bone from my body and broke it, you ripped every organ from my chest and butchered them. You carelessly breathed in every essence of my soul like one of your cigarettes but you never returned it. I became lost without you. I don't know how to breathe or walk - let alone get out of bed- I don't even know who I am, that's because you took all of me. All of my pieces and scrambled them together. A mixed up puzzle the one you never put back together.” At this point I can feel my heart aching and it hurts somuch. I grab at my chest and let out a loud sob I've been holding in, and hear Calum sniffle above me, only making everything hurt even worse.

“I'm sorry, I didn't ever want to hurt you.” He whimpered. I looked up to see his almond eyes full of tears and his lips were trembling.

“But you did Calum. But I'm sorry that I can never be her.” I whispered, he opened his mouth to interject but I interrupted him. “I saw the pictures on the internet. Once I saw her I knew I couldn't be compared to her. Her looks will never compare to me, and the fact that she seemed to make you happy enough to do this means my character could never compare to hers. Over the months I just loved you more and more, but every photo of us you would take down, or every night out canceled was my reminder that I couldn't fully get you to love me like I love you Calum.” I cry even harder and end up wrapping my arms around Calum's torso and cried into his chest letting out all my sobs staining his grey T-shirt.

“Mel I do love you. I love you so much.” He cried holding onto me tightly as if he's trying to pull my pieces back together.

“If I could take every tear I've cried over you I could fill oceans.” I whisper.

He pulled away and gazed into my probably bloodshot eyes, “I'm so sorry I hurt you Mel.” He replied grasping onto my hand. I stared at the small gesture, I wish it could warm me up and fill me with happiness like it used to. I extracted my hand from his grip, I've always knew Calum was too good to be true but I've always hoped for the best, I thought but didn't say. Instead, “I was anchored onto you like a buoy.” I replied out loud while walking over to his room door to leave, before walking out I turned, “But you left me to drown in the ocean of my tears and love for you.” And like that I walked out, feeling more broken than before.

//

“Mel wake up.” Ramona demands as she enters my room. I groan and turn on my side before pulling the covers over my head.

“Mel now, we have interviews.” Ramona says while ripping the covers off of my body, causing me to tumble off the bed and land on my back.

“Fuck.” I yelp before sitting up rubbing my lower back to try and relieve some pain. I shoot Ramona a deathlike glare and proceed to get up and walk to my dresser and grab a decent outfit for today.

I settled on a plain black t-shirt with denim shorts and black stockings, tying the outfit together with my black doc martins and a simple choker. I spray my favorite fruity perfume and walk over to my bed to grab my bag. Keys, phone, earbuds, wallet, and charger is all there. Please with everything I walk over to my body mirror and pull up my messy purple hair into a simple ponytail pulling some strands of hair from the sides to frame my face. I quickly walk over to my dresser and fill in my eyebrows, and then swipe on a few coats of mascara.

“Ramona are you ready?” I call into the hallway as I depart from my room, only to see my sister waiting patiently on our couch twirling her keys with her pointer finger.

“I've been ready now come on.” She replies rolling her eyes before disappearing behind our front room door.

-

“Now you guys have a gig in a few days?” The bleach blonde reporter asks. If anyone questioned me on how I felt my answer would be annoyed, this reporter's voice is annoying and she seems to be trying too hard just for an interview.

“We do, it will be in downtown LA and it's only five dollars to enter, we will be giving everything we earn to charities.” Ramona beamed, I'm proud that she came up with the idea of us giving all our earnings to charity.

“Now Mel, I'm going to ask you a few things,”

God no please.

“How are you? With the whole Calum cheating mishap?” She questions furrowing her blonde and fairly thin eyebrows, her green eyes piercing through my whole soul.

I swallow down the large lump in my throat and twirl my thumbs around each other, looking down at my lap. “Well I should be saying that it's okay, but that'd make me the biggest liar ever if I said that. So it's not okay and it won't ever be, I believe that he knows his actions had such a big impact like they did. They ruined me, but the fact that he never noticed me catching on, him deleting our pictures and going out with her when we had plans. That destroyed me, broke me down.” I mumbled earning a small ‘mmmm’ from the green eyed blondie.

“Do you ever wish to go back to when you two first met? Connected?”

“See that's the sad thing about time. I do wish I could go back, but you can't. Once time passes you can't go back, you either mourn its absence or focus on the here and now. I feel myself mourning Calum quite often. My heart feels hollow and I can't trick myself into thinking that I'm whole. My body knows Calum is not with me, I should have told him that I knew, I should have hugged him tighter, fought a little harder, cried a little louder. I could have, but I didn't and I wish I did.” I reply wiping the tears away, not daring to look back up at the reporter.

“I'm sorry Mel.” Ramona coos, rubbing small circles on my back to try and help me.

“You and Calum met at a party? What do you think would've happened if you ignored him?”

I laugh at her question, how would I have reacted? “I probably would've had a hard time ignoring him anyway. Those eyes of his pulled me in, and anyone who says his brown eyes are boring they are so horribly wrong- they're so easy to fall into. His were beautiful, so easy to fall into. Maybe the alcohol helped, but I felt dizzy looking into them. We stayed on the front lawn that morning, just joking around laughing with each other, and even though we missed the sunrise, I felt like I had witnessed the greatest artwork of all time just watching him. How his eyes crinkled around whenever he'd genuinely laugh. His smile, I love that smile so much, I love him so much.” I whimpered, taking that it's too much I get up and walk out of the room. People are coming around me, shoving water bottles and tissues in my hands, I start to panic there's too many people and it's making everything worse.

“Please move.” I whimper feeling overwhelmed with all the crowding around me. Nobody listens, their voices just overlap and it all becomes too much, the Calum questions, the upcoming gig, and the cheating, all of it's too much. I push through everyone and rush to the exit to try and calm myself with some fresh air.

“Look who came to the party. Want a smoke?” A voice by my left side asks. I turn my head and face Josh, great now my ex?

“No.” I hiss, turning my head away from him not wanting to see the drummer, the person who once taught me my dream, my passion.

“That's one way to treat me. But I guess you're aloud to be mad since that boy broke you. What was his name? Calum? The bassist?” He sneered causing me to turn back to him and take a couple steps closer to his face. As I'm gazing at him, I can see the stubble on his chin that he has yet to shave, and smell the deathly minty scent off of him that overwhelms my senses. Memories flooding through my head of Calum, yet Josh is showing every other picture.

“Don't ever talk about him, you don't deserve it.” I spat, causing him to smile widely. He threw his cigarette on the floor and stomped on it, turning ever so slowly to face me again.

“And you don't deserve the hurt he brought you princess.” He replied walking away from the building leaving me standing here with so many thoughts.