#Convoluted Theatrics Spoilers

[craykaycee]

Eyy!!! Dw dw I didn't forget ab this poll ab a disabled Reader :DD

If anyone has personal experiences with a prosthetic, don't be afraid to shoot me an ask, I don't bite :DD Happy Disability Pride Month, fellows ^-^

The fella in the bottom right is not from the DLC btw

[doccywhomst]

BELTEMPEST REVIEW (EDA #17)

a pretty (bad) book. 1.5/10 for doing my boy dirty.

i don’t usually rate anything this low, but many confounding negative variables really fouled up the plot and characters for me. if you read more, beware: there will be excerpts and major spoilers.

here’s my general perspective: this is the dr who christian sonic the hedgehog fanfiction. it has so many buckwild scenes (like the doctor building a forcefield device that protects a spaceship that crashed on an island from a huge tsunami, and subsequently surfing the tsunami literally to the white house oval office window and having a conversation with the president), and the plot is one giant jesus metaphor that starts nowhere and goes nowhere! so if that’s your thing, you’ll love it.

however…. imo, the doctor is extremely obnoxious in this one. like in war of the daleks, he goes on long pretentious rants, talks in riddles, the quips are trash, and he occasionally feels more like seven (probably bc jim mortimore wrote 4 VNAs - it really surprised me how bad this book was, i’d never have guessed that jim also wrote “the natural history of fear” audio). here’s an example:

he’s like this from the very first scene (p.14):

i know the doctor is kind of a clown sometimes but this dude is a whole court jester, with bells on. it’s too much for me. he talks in amusing little circles, which might be interesting as a one-off in a much better novel, but becomes a dragging constant in this one. i also hate how he constantly talks down to people like a smartass caricature.

here’s some dialogue that i did enjoy, because it felt shockingly substantial (almost out of place), and expands on a scene from scarlet empress:

that was on page 93. the only part i really liked.

the plot orbits around the turbulent sun Bel as it begins to expand, scorching and destroying many of its 22 inhabited planets. ever since the peoples of Bellannia II, IV, XIII, etc. developed space travel, they’ve been dumping their radioactive and toxic waste onto a dead little world, which falls into the sun; little did the Bellannians know, a giant alien embryo was incubating in Bel’s warmth, and their pollution threatens to kill it. dun-dun-dun!

it’s kill the moon. it’s just 249-page kill the moon, but now with a melodramatic Rapture subplot.

right…. okay. just read this:

she ate 💅✨

anyway. millions if not billions of Bellannians are killed as the sun consumes or breaks apart their planets, and some of them turn to a traditional religion that encourages suicide (achieving an “Endless State” through eating poisoned wafers), but many of them are Actually Saved™️ by a little guy you might have heard of called…… Saketh.

the plot was kinda convoluted but essentially he was burned to death but came back, and now anyone who consumes his flesh will live forever (from what i gather, they die but they’re in suspended animation purgatorycore? and they’ll be brought back to life later? but the book ends abruptly and doesn’t explain much.)

i obviously hated it. i really wanted to try to like it, but i couldn’t take it seriously. jim mortimore’s style feels purpley and theatrical, but instead of erring on the side of camp, it feels like it’s meant to be genuine religious/political commentary. it’s serious like how christian sonic fanart is serious. maybe i’m just not the right audience.

the intro might be one of the most interesting sections, given how personal and anthropological it feels: it tells two versions of the deaths of two brothers, who are among the last of their people. it was pretty good, i liked it. but not really the rest.

so yeah. overall, 1.5/10. this is in my bottom three worst EDAs so far. it’s a pretty harsh rating but i’m generous when my appreciation is earned :/

[ogradyfilm]

Recently Viewed: Death Shadows

[The following review contains MINOR SPOILERS; YOU HAVE BEEN WARNED!]

The Criterion Channel’s synopsis of Hideo Gosha’s Death Shadow’s reads:

After their executions are faked by the authorities, three criminals are forced to become assassins under the command of the Shogun.

Technically, this is an accurate summary… of the film’s prologue. The actual story is significantly more convoluted—and I mean that as a compliment. The narrative is an intricately constructed puzzle that constantly reassembles, reconfigures, and recontextualizes itself; every scene introduces new characters, complications, and even entire subplots. If you ever find the subject matter objectionable or distasteful, just wait; the movie will be about something completely different within fifteen minutes.

This unconventional structure would be infuriatingly disjointed—were the central themes not so elegantly cohesive and clearly articulated. Like all of Gosha’s work in the chanbara genre, Death Shadows is staunchly antiauthoritarian, condemning any man that would abuse his power—including the secretive spymaster that “recruits” the eponymous assassins. After all, the corrupt clan officials, greedy merchants, and bloodthirsty gangsters that manipulate, exploit, and discard their subordinates deserve to be punished—but exceeding the limitations of the law in order to deliver “justice” is equally unethical (especially when this “necessary evil” is motivated by pragmatism rather than morality).

Beyond its deliberately puply premise, Death Shadows also represents the pinnacle of Gosha’s craftsmanship: this is the director’s style at its most economical, purposeful, and precise. He favors long, continuous, unbroken takes, repositioning the camera and performers to seamlessly transition from master shot to coverage (yes, this is very similar to Spielberg’s modus operandi)—a gracefully choreographed ballet that strikes a delicate balance between theatrical mise-en-scène and cinematic composition.

Gosha’s relatively restrained blocking and framing stand in stark contrast to the film’s unapologetically maximalist imagery. Much of the action unfolds on elaborately designed studio sets; hand-painted backdrops depict impressionistic sunsets and overcast skies, creating a surreal, hypnotic, dreamlike atmosphere—a dramatic departure from the grounded, gritty, naturalistic tone of the auteur’s earlier jidaigeki efforts (Three Outlaw Samurai, Sword of the Beast).

Thus, Death Shadows is a beautiful contradiction; serving as both the culmination of Gosha’s previous accomplishments in the industry and an evolution of his artistic vision, it resides comfortably at the intersection between avant-garde experimentation and popcorn entertainment.

[albertonykus]

Doraemon Movie Review: Nobita's Chronicle of the Moon Exploration (2019)

What is Doraemon? The title character of the Doraemon manga and anime is a blue robotic cat from the 22nd Century who keeps an array of high-tech gadgets in a portable pocket dimension on his belly, and has traveled from the future to improve the fortunes of a hapless schoolboy named Nobita. Although relatively obscure in the English-speaking world, Doraemon is a Mickey-Mouse-level cultural icon in East Asia (and some other regions, too). The Doraemon franchise was a big part of my childhood, and there are still elements of it that I enjoy now.

Doraemon has released theatrical films almost annually since 1980, most of which involve Nobita and his friends (kind Shizuka, brash Gian, and crafty Suneo) getting swept into adventures thanks to Doraemon's gadgets. Despite being of potentially broad appeal to fans of science fiction and animated films, there are very few English reviews of the Doraemon movies, so I'm embarking on a project to write about all the films that have come out so far. Good luck to me…

Movie premise: Doraemon helps Nobita create an alternate reality where rabbits live on the moon.

My spoiler-free take: Out of the non-remake movies to come out of the 2005 Doraemon anime reboot, this might be the one that comes closest to feeling like a “classic” Doraemon film so far, and I consider that a good thing.

POTENTIAL SPOILERS AFTER THIS POINT

Review: If one were to boil this movie down to its individual core elements, I think they’d find very little that hasn’t been done in previous Doraemon films. (Okay, having one of the movie-only characters pose as a transfer student and actually interact with Nobita’s classmates outside of the main cast is new.) However, that actually works to its benefit, in my opinion. After so many of the post-reboot Doraemon movies have felt experimental in one way or another (with varying degrees of success in my book), it was nice to see one that replicates the vibe of a classic Doraemon story without being a straight-up remake of an older film.

I also thought this movie does a good job of introducing potentially convoluted plot points without feeling bogged down, especially the main gadget that allows the story to happen: the Fringe Theory Club Member Badge, which can create alternate realities that are only perceptible to people wearing it. The effects of this gadget could have easily been overly confusing, but the film manages to establish how it works quite effectively.

I suppose there are a few things I could quibble about: maybe it strains credibility that the villain’s second-in-command would think that someone named Diabolo was working with good intentions all along, and maybe the final battle against the villain’s minions gets a bit too slapsticky to take seriously. Otherwise though, I’d say this is pretty solidly one of my favorite non-remake movies to come out of the Doraemon anime reboot.

Not to mention, Shizuka gets to save everyone here, nice! It’s been a while since the last time. I’ve lamented this before, but it seems that many recent Doraemon movies (discounting remakes) don’t know what to do with her. The fact that older entries in the series have a better track record of portraying Shizuka is honestly kind of sad, so anytime in the new movies that she gets to do something important instead of standing in the background or playing the damsel in distress can only be taken as a good sign.

Shizuka-saves-the-day count (cumulative): 8

Star rating: ★★★☆☆

[fictionalnormalcy]

Last year, my sibling had to explain to me what a kinnie was, because I really had no idea. To my understanding, it’s a character you can relate to, their personality is like yours.

When they asked me who I kinned, them knowing just how much media I’ve consumed, I said I’d never kinned anyone. Until Luz Noceda came along.

A bisexual, Latina fangirl. Who didn’t have any friends at her school. Who even though she got along well with her mom, was wished she could be normal. She liked characters with convoluted backstories and editing clips to music. Who squeals when finding out anime spoilers. Who holds proudly to the weirdos need to stick together.

I remember being called a weirdo since I was in elementary. There were other names floated, like geek and nerd. But weirdo was the one classmates enjoyed settling on. I was changing friends every year, the one who’d get that judgy awkward look when I got excited over an interest. I was the girl who’d cling to her books and apparently, I only just found out the fact last night, I was a quiet girl. No como lo soy ahorita. So quiet, not able to be dragged into conversation, that my dad thought I had retraso mental.

Pero just like Luz, I became an outspoken girl. I embraced my weirdness. Though the issue is I don’t know what caused me to step out of my shell, become the loudmouth I am now who is one for theatrics and speaks with her hands. (I share that characteristic with Hiccup, I came to note)

Luz is truly someone I kin. Although, I wish I had the friends that I could embrace and a girlfriend who enjoys my intensity.

[grandducktale]

Hiveswap, Homestuck, and the horror of “Clown World”

So spoilers for Hiveswap Act 2, late as I might be with it.

The phrase Clown World is thrown around a lot. Usually a reference towards perceived naivety on the part of homogeneous cultures when they are integrating a different culture or going through progressive shifts. 

However, when I think of Homestuck and Hiveswap, I think of “Clown World” in a somewhat different way. (The political definition of Clown World I think does have validity to it even if its been stretched out and used in bad faith)

So Hiveswap Act 2. It plays like a Homestuck Game meaning it has this mix of humor and horror, and funny art.(Below is a highlight of the game I won’t spoil the context)

It also is a huge pain in the ass to play, both as an adventure game, and as a series which cut its teeth on convoluted captchalogue.

Anyways, Hiveswap Act 2 predominantly features a train, the upperclass, and the literal clown-run justice system of Homestuck and boy it sucks.. I had access to a walkthrough and I decided not to get the “golden ending” because the trial sequence is just so darn draining with the typing quirks, controls, casual sociopathy of the clown and teal bloods and yada yada yada. If you have a pen and paper handy and don’t mind putting up with the sheer nonsense and obtuse communication style you can probably get the “best ending” just by being persistent, but true to form with homestuck and “death”, if you brute force it you’ll be emotionally drained by the end. (Below are out of context scenes for the trial sequence which has multiple endings since in Homestuck courts are a theatrical performance minus the “guilty” actor getting to live once all is said and done)

(she may not be alright)

Anyways, when I think of Homestuck’s horror it’s sort of like how Andrew Hussie describes it. 

“HS seems to combine all the meaningless deaths of a trial-and-error game journey with the way death is treated dramatically in other media, where unlike our oblivious Mario, the characters are aware and afraid of the many deaths they must experience before finally winning the game.”

The implicit problem, awareness present or absent, is that to overcome death so many times, one must lose the fear of death, or highly suppress it. And if that’s the case, what does Homestuck or Hiveswap’s “winner” actually get?

Whenever Homestuck or Hiveswap goes dark, the convoluted inventory system, the dumb typing quirks, the oh-so-hilarious sadism, it stops being quite so funny. It becomes, like, this other kind of bend on morality and existence. How would mythological heroes interact with the heroes of Homestuck? Say they met up at a bar that only heroes could meet up at, and had a chat.

“I slayed a dragon that demanded tribute of the innocent with my mighty bow and arrow!”, Saint George would boast. “I solved needlessly convoluted puzzles and didn’t have to murder as many innocents as Faygo chugging clowns wanted me to.”, Joey Claire m i ght respond. Now Joey could understand the heroism of Saint George easily enough, but could Saint George understand Joey’s heroism when even she might not have been able to? 

That’s the horror then, of “Clown World.” The suffering experienced in it is real, and valid, but it is alien, and scary, realized after the fact, and always tainted with the idea that the mere choice to persist is the wrong one, that the game was rigged from the start, that, as a creation by someone at Carnegie Mellon would imply, the events we see storywise is the same as code executing itself, and all the ugliness that comes with it. 

Anyways if you like horror and can deal with typing quirks it might be a good game to play. Consider my musings on Homestuck something related to circumstance and fate, and wondering if the few moments of brightness and promise in the story can outshine both the subtle darkness, and holy crap not so subtle darkness. 

[residentofthedisc]

Gaslight Review

Last Saturday night I had the enormous privilege of seeing Gaslight (expertly directed by Lucy Bailey) on-stage at the Alexandra Theatre in Birmingham.

MATURE NONSPOILER REVIEW

This play was fantastic – I highly recommend going to see it if you are able. The set is beautifully realised and intricately designed; the play all takes place in this one room of this middle-class Victorian house, but they have transparent walls and ceilings so that you can see the actors moving beyond this room. This does wonders for the tension when you are aware of things that the characters are not. The sound designs were excellent as well, even if I was punched in the face three times by jump scares.

The cast are all excellent, for the most part. Bella Manning, played by Charlotte Emmerson, was probably the character I had the most difficulty believing; there were some strange acting choices in the vein of overly theatrical and large movements, but it was a gamble I think paid off as I was used to it and applauding by the end. James Wilby as Jack Manning was precisely as creepy and sinister in his movements as his character needed to be; I was genuinely afraid for the other characters when they were in his presence – particularly if they were alone (despite having been a huge fan of this play since I was a kid and therefore knowing the final outcome). However, I struggled occasionally to make out what he was saying as he tended towards speaking rather quickly. Martin Shaw as Inspector Rough was an absolute fucking delight even if, thankfully, his accent emigrated from Yorkshire to Ireland by the second act. He stole every single scene and added some much-needed levity to the proceedings. Mary Chater and Georgia Clarke-Day also performed admirably as Elizabeth the cook and Nancy the maid respectively and I was engaged totally whenever they appeared onstage.

The first two acts may progress a little slowly for some (I personally was a bit hesitant during the first one myself because of my hearing issues), but the third act brought its absolute A-game and was tense, funny, and cathartic to the extent that I left the theatre grinning ear-to-ear after gripping the railing so hard that my knuckles turned white.

So, I would highly, highly recommend seeing this show and – in my opinion – trying to see it before it gets to the West End because sometimes ironing out the kinks in a show makes for a more organic and entertaining experience. 

IMMATURE OUT-OF-CONTEXT SPOILER REVIEW

·       Five minutes in and I already am set to challenge Mr Manning to fisticuffs.

·       Manning, you are a bastard. Bella. Kill him.

·       BELLA KILL HIM.

·       IT TIS I, INSPECTOR ROUGH, YOUR LORD AND SAVIOUR IN A HALO OF LIGHT.

·       I’ll wait for you to pull yourself together. *waits dramatically*. *Waits dramatically*. *OK, it’s awkward now*.

·       Where the feck in Ireland are you from Rough?

·       NEVER MIND, HE’S A GODDAMN DELIGHT.

·       ROUGH IS FRIEND-SHAPED.

·       “Who the fuck are you and why are you in my house?” “Let me explain in the most convoluted manner I possibly can while stealing the remains of your tea.”

·       Rough has ADHD, there is no other explanation.

·       “I have medicine, but I hate it and it doesn’t work.” “You haven’t tried my medicine!” “What’s that?” “WHISKEY”

·       This was the first laugh from the audience and it was glorious.

·       Creepypasta reveal: “IT WAS THIS HOUSE ALL ALONG!”

·       Oh, good. He’s Irish now.

·       *Takes off his coat* Rough: Am I not a fine figure of a man? *strikes a pose* Bella: Self-love is great but concentrate ffs.

·       I aspire to have as much fun as Shaw is having oh my god.

·       “It is my great regret in life that I never became one of two things. The first being a gardener and the second –“ *produces a set of lockpicks* - “A burglar!”

·       Like, mood.

·       (About to break into a secret compartment inside the locked drawer) “This always makes me feel like a dentist.” *cue wild arm movements no dentist should ever do*

·       His elbow was briefly possessed. Hysterics.

·       Rough you need a new dentist. Please. Change dentists. 

Did I mention that Martin Shaw is a delight?

·       Bella *long speech about how she knows her husband is upstairs because of the light changes* *light changes* Bella: The lights! Rough: Wait, I was supposed to remember something about the lights?? Bella: ROUGH YOU’RE USELESS.

·       Elizabeth the cook is the only person who can keep her head.

·       Rough: ELIZABETH HIDE ME. I FUCKED UP.

·       Rough hides in a closet. Three times. He keeps reappearing to give instructions and to move chairs.

·       White-knuckle time.

·       Manning: I only returned to change my linen. Elizabeth: CAN I FETCH YOU ONE SIR. TOTALLY NOT BECAUSE I’M HIDING AN EX-POLICEMAN IN YOUR CLOSET.

·       Two dudes in a walk-in wardrobe five feet apart ‘cause they’re not gay.

·       Manning: Oh, I don’t like this one. I’ll get another. *Walks back into the closet*

·       ELIZABETH SWEATING

·       Elizabeth is the real hero here.

·       Manning: Would you testify to the police, Elizabeth? Elizabeth: With fucking pleasure, sir.

·       Martin Shaw: I have made an acting choice for frustration! *fondles the air at crotch height*

·       Sir. You made a choice. It was… a choice.

·       Never do that again.

·       It’s a meme among my friends now for frustration.

·       Bella finds the evidence by following logic and I love her.

·       Rough: Have you ever been embraced by an old detective? Bella: … no? Rough: Well, get ready, this is your immediate future.

·       GIGGLES.

·       Wholesome content

·       Jack Manning and Nancy necking somewhat randomly – saucy…?

·       I felt like he was going to strangle her at any moment.

·       No! Bella! DON’T BE ALONE WITH HIM

·       Also, I was promised a dog. No good bois.

·       ROUGH EMERGES FROM THE CLOSET – I WON’T SAY SYMBOLISM BUT SYMBOLISM.

·       How did he get in there? Like, it’s explained, but I don’t like the explanation.

·       Hi, I’m a ghost. I’m running with this theme.

·       WOULD YOU LIKE A CIGURR??

·       Yes, show the murderous villain the jewels he’s been searching twenty years for while (apparently) alone. Balls, man. Balls.

·       You go, Bella! You get him back! The end is fantastic (save a weird jumpscare of Manning hanging. That was… kinda stupid.)

[independence1776]

Master and Apprentice by Claudia Gray review

This is a bit of a coincidence with my posting this review today, but it's certainly apropos: twenty years ago today, The Phantom Menace had its US theatrical release.

First off, this is not an unbiased review. It's about as biased as you can get for two reasons:

I wholeheartedly love the Jedi Order.

I've had a crush on Qui-Gon for twenty years.

That said, on to the review. Cut for serious spoilers. Possibly a bit more on the meta side in parts than outright book review.

My overall thoughts: it's a solid, enjoyable book. I have a few minor quibbles with it and two major ones (one out-of-universe, one in-universe), but it's good enough I'll likely buy it when it's released in paperback. So of course, the quibbles take up more room than the good things. *rolls eyes at self*

Good Things

~ The characterization of Qui-Gon is excellent: he's the perfect mix of "that makes sense" and "I want to shake some sense into him."

~ Obi-Wan is bit less so, though I do think he's more or less in line with how he is in TPM.

~ Jedi Temple worldbuilding: gardens, mediation rooms, a meditation path/maze, aquatic levels, areas specifically for Padawans with no Masters allowed (which likely means there are Master-only areas), everyone not living in the creche has their own room, etc. And the best thing: it's another nail in the coffin of the Legends Jedi Apprentice books where if you don't have a Master by age thirteen, you're kicked out of the Order. This book explicitly says that thirteen is young to become a Padawan. (These details are, uh, a significant factor in why I want the book. I did mention I love the Jedi, didn't I? :P)

~ The Jedi Council asks Qui-Gon to join it specifically because they want his unorthodox viewpoint.

~ Dooku left the Jedi years before Qui-Gon died! No one knows why, either. But he was already starting to fall while he was training Qui-Gon; he's heavily implied to use Force lightning at one point (as in: the only reason I can't say states is that Qui-Gon didn't see the Force lightning itself).

~ The main plot is an action-adventure plot that probably a little more convoluted than it needs to be given the climax and resolution could easily have been another chapter, but the book seemed to run out of page room first. The middle drags a little, too. Overall, that aspect makes me go: "Self, you're never going to be hired to write a Star Wars novel; you just can't manage action/adventure plots of any length."

The subplot is not as much fun; it's very much a miscommunication novel where people don't make the effort to talk to each other even though they know there are communication problems. On the other hand, that makes complete sense given how those two do and don't communicate in TPM, so clear communication would have been somewhat out of character to me.

~ I really like Rael Averross and want to see more of him. He's a great example of a somewhat non-traditional Jedi… and how coming late into the Order (he was five) can be a problem. And it's not like the Jedi don't try to help him adjust; the text says they made leniencies for him but he was determined to stand out.

Minor Quibbles

~ There were a couple of worldbuilding details that make no sense if you spend more time thinking about them than on a surface level. One of these is that it doesn't seem that it's standard practice to teach Jedi younglings how to swim! This despite 1) their missions drop the Jedi all over the galaxy in all environments and 2) this book establishes that there are aquatic levels in the Temple for amphibious/aquatic species.

~ My quibble with Obi-Wan's characterization is that the book makes a point of showing over and over how much he loves flying… until the very end when a bad experience with an autopiloted ship turns him off flying. That makes no sense given that he thinks droids should be pilots. It feels a bit like the author tossed in the "loves flying" angle as a deliberate twist on expectations without doing the work to support it.

~ Prophecies… I roll my eyes at them in general. I knew it was a factor in the book because Qui-Gon (and the blurb), but that element was not much to my taste overall. Welcome to one of the reasons I kept wanting to shake Qui-Gon.

~ The male secondary lead character is very much of a "logic wins the day; emotion is bad" type who gets the girl after he realized emotions are a good thing when her capture makes him confront his feelings for her. Tiresome trope at best. I know there are parallels between him and Rael (Pax was raised by protocol droids from the age of five, which is why he is how he is; that's the age Rael entered the Order and had problems because of it), but Pax was simply annoying.

~ The climax of the book is a little muddled, not in the action sense, but the thematic sense. And why ties into what I'll rant-meta about below. It also wraps up in a couple of pages of "hey, actually, due to XYZ, everything turns out okay after all" kind of storytelling that I'm growing more and more annoyed by.

Major Quibbles

Okay, so here comes the meta.

~ Quibble 1: the book takes place quite a few years before TPM, when Obi-Wan is seventeen. Apart from a thematic connection of prophecy aka Anakin the Chosen One, there is no reason the epilogue should be set moments before Qui-Gon's funeral in TPM. This wouldn't bother me so much except that it might be the beginning of a pattern; the Padmé-and-handmaidens YA novel Queen's Shadow epilogue is set after Padmé's funeral despite the story itself ending after her first year in the Senate.

Either one on its own would have been an "okay, this is how you chose to end the story" moment. Together, they become, "Actually, forget about a happy ending; we have to remind you these characters are dead." That's… not what I want from EU novels set years before the characters die. Can we not have moments of triumph untainted?

~ Quibble 2: Until now, what I've read of the new EU was pretty consistent in avoiding the attachment = love misinterpretation of the Jedi's "no attachment" rule. And I am flatly sure that this is a misinterpretation.

Reason 1: George Lucas explicitly stated that attachment is not love; that love is fine for a Jedi; it's obsession that's the problem. Also that Jedi aren't celibate, which this novel also contradicts. I know I'm in a minority when it comes to word-of-god stuff (especially because I don't enjoy actor/director/whatever interviews and behind-the-scenes material so don't watch or pay attention to it outside of this), but I come from a fandom where word-of-god and canon-compliance/knowledge is important. In this instance, I do think what Lucas says about the Jedi, as their original creator, is vital to understanding them. I just wish he'd been a better scriptwriter so this distinction between attachment and love would have been clear in the movies.

Reason 2: The Prequel Trilogy itself shows Jedi caring for each other (when Qui-Gon is dying and Obi-Wan is really emotional), Obi-Wan telling Anakin that he considers Anakin to be his brother and that he loves him (end of Mustafar battle), and those are just the first two scenes off the top of my head. Plus, there's Luke redeeming Vader through love. Caring and love are not attachment.

(Also, what would that mean for Kanan/Hera in Rebels S4? Kanan is a Jedi. If attachment was love, he wouldn't have been in a relationship with Hera. But he was able to put others above his life despite that he would have rather lived and that's what a healthy relationship is for a Jedi, not putting his own desires first. The opposite is why Anakin fell.)

But this confusion about attachment/love is why the climax is muddled: it really only makes sense viewed through that prism. Yes, Rael loved Fanry… but that wasn't his problem. His problem was his attachment to his belief that he knew Fanry and was working for her when her own desires (bad ones, as it happens) were actually quite different; Rael was unwilling to see what he didn't want to.

In Conclusion

Despite the flaws, this novel is in my top three new EU books; the other two are Star Wars: Propaganda and A New Dawn. It's definitely the top EU novel I've read so far. I love being able to see Qui-Gon and Obi-Wan again.

[cinesaver]

Netflix History? : The Cloverfield Paradox Review

                This super bowl Sunday had many fans rejoicing for a surprise trailer, and I am not talking about Solo: A Star Wars Story. The Cloverfield Paradox not only excited fans for its much anticipated sequel, but also because they could instantly stream it on Netflix immediately after the game. Talk about convenience. The factors behind this film provide an interesting jumping off point so allow me a minute. J.J. Abrams and his production company Bad Robot are no strangers to the surprise release tactic, with their last hit film 10 Cloverfield Lane getting a release day and title a mere two months before the theatrical release. Many have speculated when the new installment of the Cloverfield franchise would be released with many rumors circling the internet. Step in power house streaming service Netflix, who has for years tried to make original films that would compete with that of an actual theater. Unfortunately they have created flop after flop especially with their most recent film Bright. Netflix paid Bad Robot around $50 million for the exclusive rights for the film. The question is was this purchase worth it, and will The Cloverfield Paradox change how audiences watch movies?

The Plot

               The two previous Cloverfield films are somewhat unrelated, with the only similarities being that the events of each film occur in the same universe. The Cloverfield Paradox hopes to fill in the gaps that have plagued fans for years. The movie takes place entirely on the space station, aptly named Cloverfield Station, whose main mission is to test their particle accelerator in hopes to solve the world’s energy crisis. Things quickly become evident that this machine has malfunctioned and caused more problems than solved.

               The Cloverfield Paradox is a space film with great concepts and ideas, but it doesn’t know how to fit all the pieces together. At times it feels like strange scenes happen in the film, and even though they can be interesting they aren’t full explained or come back to. This gives the movie a disjointed feel as if it didn’t have the answers to the questions it was asking. This movie leaves it wide open only barely answering the questions it poses.

               The film does boast an interesting look and the special effects can be impressive, but at the end of the day it simply didn’t give the connections I wanted or needed from this movie. All of this makes me wonder if the studio saw the film as being unsuccessful at the box office, so they sold its rights to Netflix to guarantee its money back.

The Cast and Characters

               For a film that is now considered a Netflix original, it does have an impressive cast that has fun with the source material. Each member of this international crew is from a different part of the world so its cast is diverse which allows each character to be unique, but at the same time each character does seem forgettable. The lead of the film is Hamilton played by Gugu Mbatha-Raw. Her performance is very suitable, but much like the rest of this film, her backstory and character seemed muddled. I often questioned why her character made the choices she does.

               The second notable crew member is Schmidt, who is played by Daniel Brühl. I will keep the story of this character as spoiler free as possible, so I apologize if this is vague. His character is one of the more interesting in the film, but the interesting concepts are never allowed to take full form. Rather it simply talks about it and moves forward without looking back.

               The last actor that needs to be talked about is Elizabeth Debicki as Jensen. Much like Brühl, her characters origins are a high point for the film. That is to say her characters motivations seemed rushed, so it feels like it is coming out of left field when she does make some drastic moves throughout the film.

The Verdict

               At this point Netflix has become a master of advertising. Their aggressive ad campaign gives hope for fans, but at the end of the day its content cannot keep up. The Cloverfield Paradox can’t seem to reach the high bar that was set by the previous two films. It promises to answer questions, but simply asks more. The film does have a good ensemble cast with some impressive visuals, but also an overly convoluted script. Unlike my other reviews this one doesn’t have an option of discount prices so I will just suggest it is worth a watch for its entertainment value, but realize that this film doesn’t reach its full potential.

[aion-rsa]

Double World Review: Kung Fu Eye Candy for Pandemic Comfort Food

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Like so many 2020 films, Double World was slated for a major theatrical release this summer. But due to the pandemic, it has become one of the first big films to jump online in some hopes of recouping its costs. It’s a shame because Double World is the kind of film that was made for the big screen. It opens a spectacular new fantasy world, brimming with ravishing visuals. Haven’t heard of it?  Don’t feel bad. It’s from China. Had 2020 gone as planned, Double World might have had a limited North American theatrical release at best, but now we can see it on Netflix. 

Double World is based on a popular MMORPG called Zhengtu, which is the movie’s original title in Chinese. Zhengtu means ‘way to conquer’. China’s massive population has the world’s largest online gaming community and Zhengtu is one of China’s top five online games, boasting millions of players since its debut in 2007. Zhengtu has a reputation for ruthless play. Gamers can boost their status just by buying it, resulting in many gaming addicts losing their family fortunes just to level up. A high-level character can die easily at the hands of a higher-level character, and that can be bought. And this real-world brutality carries over into Double World. Spoiler alert: many heroes die in this movie. Like any videogame-based movie, Double World has an intrinsic fanbase, enough to invest in a $42.9 M budget, which is modest by Hollywood standards but sizeable for China. Almost all that budget went into special effects.

Double World is the latest from Hong Kong director Teddy Chan. His last two projects were martial arts films starring Donnie Yen: the modern day serial killer thriller, Kung Fu Jungle, and Republic of China chase movie, Bodyguards and Assassins. Donnie isn’t in Double World; he’s currently trending elsewhere on Netflix in Ip Man 4: The Finale. Nevertheless, Double World is packed with Kung Fu fighting, which is unsurprising given its videogame origins. 

Set in an ancient China fantasy world of swords, sorcery, dragons and oppressive tyrants, Double World has a hackneyed martial arts plot that has been replayed since Enter the Dragon – a tournament of epic proportions. However, in its defense, good Kung Fu films aren’t always so plot driven. It’s the action that sells it and Double World delivers plenty of fight scenes as warriors from across land gather to compete in a series of trials. The story centers around a threesome of competitors: an orphan thief reminiscent of an Asian Aladdin Dong Yilong (Canadian pop star Henry Lau), a haunted trooper with a broken spear Chu Hun (Kung Fu TV star Peter Ho) and a cute pickpocket with an anime-huge sword Jinggang (ingenue Lin Chenhan). Their performances are adequate although they are upstaged by Jiang Luxia as a revenge-driven freed slave and Hu Ming as the truly despicable villain Guan. It’s a convoluted tale of past tragedies and the struggle for redemption. 

Where Double World succeeds is world building. The color schemes are sumptuous, a tantalizing visual treat replete with eye-popping CGI-enhanced sets and opulent costumes, all rich in detail. The arms and armor are beautifully actualized with dragon-encrusted helmets, sinister spinning sickles and wicked bladed tonfa, so elaborate that it will challenge the best of cosplayers. It’s such a brilliantly imaginative vision that viewers must chose between reading the subtitles or enjoying the scenery, and those that opt for the latter will likely enjoy it more. 

The fight scenes constantly level up like a videogame should. Pulling the high-flying Kung Fu wires here is veteran Hong Kong choreographer Stephen Tung. Tung has directed action since the late seventies with over 80 films to his credit. Tung and Chen collaborated on The Accidental Spy, famous for Jackie Chan’s butt naked fight in an Istanbul street market. In Double World, Tung convincingly orchestrates the diminutive Jinggang wielding a gargantuan sword. The first tournament trial, a race across a web of chains over a spiked pit with random iron boulders, is so dazzling that Tung’s physics-defying melees can be forgiven. After all, it’s a fantasy film, like a comic book movie. You can’t call out fights for lack of realism when battling giant monster scorpions. 

There was such an awesome line-up of blockbusters planned this summer and we’re all missing the diversion of going to a movie theater. Instead, we have the constant stream of hopeless news. In this new reality, escapist park-your-brain-outside fare like Double World is a welcome relief. 

Double World is available on Netflix

The post Double World Review: Kung Fu Eye Candy for Pandemic Comfort Food appeared first on Den of Geek.

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[buzzdixonwriter]

Spoilericious Notes On THE LAST JEDI

That’s good… Luke Skywalker, Kylo Ren, and Yoda (hey, I said this would be spoilericious!) are all in agreement that humanity (because humanity represents about 90% of the Star Wars universe; there’s a whole side issue on human privilege that could be explored but we won’t) has grossly misunderstood what The Force is all about, attributing moral / ethical values it lacks (The Force simply…is), and as such creating a huge mess with the whole Jedi / Sith dichotomy and so should be (literally) burned to the ground and something new built from the ashes.

That’s bad… Based on the amount of training Rey goes through to get to avalanche lifting levels of Force mastery, Rocky Balboa would be an omnipotent god if he could just get into the Star Wars universe.  Y’know how in Hong Kong action films and Japanese anime the characters say, “We need special training,” and they spend thirty seconds to a minute in a montage and come out ready to kick Bruce Lee’s ass?  Not as much training as that.

That’s good… For the first time the Star Wars universe acknowledges the dreadful compromise and complexity of any large scale society, in particular how the wealth of the Star Wars universe is generated through arms sales and as such there is absolutely no reason for anyone to stop fighting.

That’s bad… In his climactic showdown with Kylo Ren, Luke Skywalker (dammit, read the title of this post; I said there would be spoilers) promises him and the fans that ”the war is just beginning”.  Question: Are Disney and the filmmakers even aware that they are criticizing their own business model?  I mean, in a certain sense they’re trapped; by the very name Star WARS they are compelled to tell stories about a grandiose interstellar conflict, unlike Star Trek which is just about a long trip that visits distant planets (or at least used to be…).  But this means that despite the title of Episode IV, there is no hope! and the Star Wars universe is condemned to an eternity of horrific conflict and violent death.

That’s good… Everybody has agreed to forget all about that silly midi-chlorian nonsense.

That’s bad… After presenting a consistently godless universe in ten theatrical features, two TV movies, six TV series, and lord knows how many books / comics / games, the concept of God has been dropped into Star Wars (hell as a concept was introduced back in Empire Strikes Back).  I’m absolutely not saying that God has no place in popular entertainment, just that the universe of Star Wars -- both in concept and execution -- consistently portrayed a culture where the very idea of God had never been introduced (but this may be attributable to bad scripting; see below…).

That’s good… Snoke’s throne room is like something out of a 1950s MGM musical, and I mean that in a good sense:  It looks genuinely futuristic and other worldly.  There are some small edits and cutaway shots in the film that look like nothing else in the Star Wars universe (and not big special effects scenes but rather subtle little moments).  Now and then there are specific call outs to earlier films, in particular Luke Skywalker dying (Fnck you!  I told you there would be spoilers!) under twin suns echoing the moment in the original Star Wars when he stared off into the twin sunset of Tatooine and realized destiny was calling him elsewhere.  And the salt-encrusted mineral world of Crait is the closest thing to a genuinely alien world that we’ve ever seen in Star Wars.

That’s bad… As my son-in-law Bobby Dragulescu observed, the Star Wars universe is only visually consistent:  In no shape / fashion / form does it portray a uniform worldview (or rather, galactic-view) of a society that could actually function.  The political systems are a hot mess, and for all the endless talk about trade alliances in the prequels, there’s virtually no signs of actual large scale interstellar trade or commerce (with the possible exception of the bio-factory on Kamino cranking out endless copies of Temuera Morrison in Attack Of The Clones).  Mind you, virtually all space operas suffer from this flaw (Star Trek The Original Series hid it better than most by taking place so waaay far out there that commerce had not yet completely caught up with the Enterprise).  Star Wars looks pretty but makes no damn sense, and this problem only gets worse with each additional installment, building towers of cards on foundations of sand.

That’s good… Poe’s brief exchange with General Hux was Monty Python / Hitchhiker’s Guide To The Galaxy level hilarity, shockingly unexpected in a funny (not offensive) manner, and an absolute delight harkening back to the cheekiest lines in the original Star Wars and The Empire Strikes Back.

That’s bad… The rest of the film has the worst dialog heard in a Star Wars movie written by anybody other than George Lucas.

That’s good… More (human) diversity in the roles, with females and non-whites / non-Europeans filling in a lot of supporting roles.

That’s bad… As much as I hate agreeing on anything with the fragile alt-right critics who decry said diversity, to this specifically limited degree they have a point:  The appearance of such characters was often shot / staged / edited in a way that instead of appearing naturalistic called undo attention to the casting.  “Hey, look!  We’ve got an Asian female doing stuff!”

That’s good… Gimme a moment…

That’s bad… I almost typed “There isn’t a single good performance in this film” but realized that isn’t true; there are several good performances but the bad ones are so bad they suck all memory of the good into a black hole of mediocrity.  Daisy Ridley as Rey does a good job, Domhnall Gleeson as General Hux and Benicio del Toro as DJ both chew scenery with great gusto, Kelly Marie Tran as Rose Tico struggles mightily to make a silk purse out of her sow’s ear and ends up with a nice imitation leather wallet, Andy Serkis draws ahead of Doug Jones as the best-actor-you-never-actually-see-onscreen race, but much to my delight Adam Driver as Kylo Ren goes so far over the emo top that I am capable of forgiving the film of all its grievous flaws.  That being said, The Last Jedi does Carrie Fisher no favors in her final portrayal of Leia Organa (flying through space like a Marvel superhero doesn’t help, either), Laura Dern is woefully miscast and seems to think she’s just doing a table read, and although serviceable as Luke Skywalker, Mark Hamil proves himself to be the least compelling performer to play a Jedi or Sith.  (He does shine as the voice of Dobbu Scay, a trollish alien who insists on shoving coins up BB-8’s nether regions.)

That’s good… ...lemme think…

That’s bad… When it’s good (see themes up above) the script is very good, but when it’s bad (50%+ of the remaining film) it sucks wet farts out of dead porgs.  Finn, Rose, and DJ have an incredibly convoluted / overly complicated hour long sub-plot that contributes absolutely nothing to the story’s final resolution.  They visit a gambling casino world that looks like a crappy swipe from a James Bond movie (tho the Gerry Anderson Supermarionation-looking alien was a nice touch), feature an alien critter race that’s a lift from Syd Mead, and chat incessantly via com-links while traveling through hyperspace despite the fact that tracking ships through hyperspace is repeatedly presented as a radical leap in technology!  And while it’s revealed the First Order has planted a homing device on Leia’s ship (something Darth Vader did in the original Star Wars with the Millennium Falcon) and has an agent on board, nothing is ever done with these ideas.

That’s good… Oh!  Snoke tells Kylo Ren to “get rid of that silly mask”.  That’s nice.

That’s bad… The Last Jedi drops the ball on several plot points in addition to the hyperspace tracking mentioned above.  Luke promises to teach Rey three lessons about the force, but only gets through two and the third one is never alluded to again.  They make a big deal about Rey’s parents being despicable drug addicts who sold her as an infant, completely lacking in Force pedigree which means (a) they are belaboring a non-crucial story point or (b) -- and we’ll give ‘em a benefit of a doubt here -- they’re planting a red herring in order to set up a big reveal for the next movie.  Snoke is demonstrated to be omniscient and capable of planning so far ahead and in so much detail that he can create a fake future in Kylo Ren’s mind for Rey to read, but conveniently leaves a live / fully charged light saber on the arm of his throne to get sliced in half by (and if he’s such a hot snot re Force abilities, why would getting whacked in half ala Darth Maul even slow him down?). 

That’s good… ...I got nuthin’…

That’s bad… Using a starship as a kamikaze by revving up to hyperjump speed and ramming it into the baddies’ ship is a cool idea but makes one wonder why didn’t anybody use it before in the Star Wars universe (c’mon, space torpedoes) and why did they wait to the very last minute to do so -- losing most of the supporting cast in the process -- instead of turning one of the other, smaller ships against Snoke’s flagship?  And nobody in the Star Wars universe has figured out that putting a sharp hairpin turn and/or baffles in an exhaust vent will keep people from dropping bombs / flying spaceships through it.

That’s good… Hey, no Death Star.  Finally.

 © Buzz Dixon