#Edit: actually anxious isn't even the right word? It's more like I think people might be talking and laughing about me but it's kinda

[roadimusprime]

T-shirt that says "I was emotionally and mentally neglected as a child"

[nothing0fnothing]

when i post things about narc abuse on my blog i occasionally get ppl being like "don't classify all ppl with npd as abusers!!!" when i didn't say that? tbh on the whole "is narc abuse ableist" thing i defer to my best friend's wisdom, he recently graduated with a BA in psychology (im so proud!!!) and he said smth to the effect of "if you're trying to diagnose them with npd to demonize them then yeah not good but also narcissistic is a word independent of that diagnosis so context is important" its like how ppl without depression can still say theyre depressed or someone without anxiety can say theyre anxious yknow? context matters! i call my parents narc abusers bc it "fits the bill" as in from the medical studies ive read from professionals, all this criteria fits their behavior, not bc i actually believe they have npd. their actions are narcissistic but actually having npd is a question i can't answer.

the point being: im sure you get a lot more comments like that on your blog than my own. the few i get make me upset for a while bc it feels so invalidating (or maybe im just chronically online lmao.) how do you deal with it all? i'm sure the answer is just "block" but does it go deeper? it must feel awful to be called ableist when all you've done is try to spread awareness about a very real thing that happened to you. i could use some of your strength bc your blog is still going strong even amidst the hate 🙏

This ask was actually so lovely to read. You're eloquent and educated and if you'd like to dm me please do any time I'd love to chat with you and check out your blog.

You're absolutely right about narcissism and NPD. Narcissism is a personality trait. One that most healthy people posses. You can't diagnose someone a narcissist, because "narcissist" isn't a disorder.

There's a misconception that NPD is the clinical diagnosis for excessive narcissism. Actually, the diagnostic criteria for NPD is very clear that one does not even have to have narcissistic traits to be diagnosed with it. And it has nothing to say about abusing others, so how recognising abuse is considered a drive by diagnosis of NPD is beyond me.

Saying your abuser is narcissistic doesn't mean you think your abuser has this specific disorder. We know this so to us it's common sense. Unfortunately common sense isn't so common, especially in the narcissistic positivity side of this app.

It's so easy to feel provoked when you know all this, and you're educated and you just want to make content that will connect you to a community of other survivors. Only for some asshole who barely knows what NPD is, decides they're going to make your trauma all about it. It's not chronically online to be made upset by behaviour like that. People like to tell us the Internet isn't real, but when it's our connection to communities of people who share our niche experiences, it is real. Don't undermine yourself when you feel upset like that. Words can hurt anyone, even when they come from an ignorant low life who thinks they can clean up the internet, one trauma support blog at a time.

Me personally? I like to wait to hit the block button till after I've goaded them into an absolute breakdown. It entertains me to no end to watch them rage like toddlers as they start to realise they know next to nothing on a topic I've absolutely schooled them in. It sounds cruel but I have no sympathy for arseholes, especially when they're intentionally spamming random accusations and slurs on my vent posts in hopes they can get a rise out of a vulnerable person. I might make a "narcissists rage at facts and logic" compilation for my own amusement... But that's not really helpful advice to anyone who isn't a bitter hag, like me.

When I first started on this platform I kept my most common response paragraphs in my notes and clipboard to paste and post when I got the same asks day in and day out. It really helped me to reply in a measured way I knew was proof read and edited without having to exert the mental energy it takes to type out a whole reply every time you get one. This of course is if you're so inclined to engage with them.

I also have a limit for how long I'll engage. Usually my rule is I stop responding when they stop asking questions, because my blog is here to be supportive, not to receive criticism from the pro narcissist community. When they stop being coherent and and start being belligerent, that's when will always I block them and that's usually the end of it.

I did have one guy who I'd blocked on 3 or 4 seperate accounts for being belligerent. He was making new accounts every time to spam my asks and reblogs with increasingly ridiculous, heinous and obviously ragebaity shit. I just reposted his replies onto reddit where the crowd is, let's say, more critical of behavior like that. He had an epic meltdown and I've never seen his username ever again. If you're not comfortable doing that, let me know and I'll do it for you. You'd be doing me a favour because I'm a little shit and I love to watch the fireworks.

My last bit of advice to you is to make mutuals and make them friends. I struggle with being sociable in any consistent way, but a few messages back and forth to foster a good relationship with the community is so helpful. It makes your blog feel like an actual supportive environment. It puts your content across the dashboards of more sympathetic people and less losers thanks to the algorithm. Most importantly, when you have friends on this app they're more likely to back you up when an absolute cretin who snuck onto earth decides to pick on you for no reason. Having that back up is invaluable to blogs like ours and it's so important to have it when you're just starting out, especially if you're already getting the narc apologists in your notifs.

That being said, I genuinely do hope you reach out to me. I'd love to be able to send you some more of my strength when you need it. 💛🤎💛

[burning-sol]

Heyoo, im just a lil curious as to what you have against twt ppl. I'm starting to realize that u guys just don't want us here and I have no clue what our app usage means to you. I was directed here after expressing my anger at being told to fuck off and that I was shit for having been in the twt community. Just want your thoughts since you've proclaimed yourself the be the officiant for chasing us away.

To be clear I'm the "officiant of chasing people away" because within the past few days I have have made some truly enlightening posts that all Twitter people should see. And that should make them be so disgusted by this site that they never come back. This is to say I am jokingly the officiant of chasing people away.

But if you want an actual answer, nobody here actually like DESPISES twt users. If that were the case we wouldn't be creating posts that welcome new users and explain the site to them or greeting new users in their asks!! It's hard to word but we don't take issue with the people, just the environment of the jrwitwt community. Basically, just a difference in vibe.

It's very hard to explain but. Honestly? It's stuff like your reblog that makes it hard for us not to be a LITTLE taunting towards jrwitwt. You barely interacted with this community AT ALL and picked out a take, that wasn't even really a take about twitter in a way that matters, and decided to make a rant 10x longer than the original post complaining about how we hate twitter. Whereas if you'd just held off on that opinion then you might have gotten FAR more context on our situation. Or you could have easily gotten an answer if you'd just sent a polite ask in the FIRST place, opening yourself up to an actual discussion rather than jumping to such an aggressive conclusion.

When you typed, "just calm down bro," it was LAUGHABLE to read for the sheer fact you produced a problem where there didn't have to be any. You made a member of our community anxious and upset and for what? And for what?

I would talk more abt this but I think this is the main point that matters right now. And I would apologise for my less sympathic wording, but I think you're mature enough to understand why that's difficult for me to do with the current context.

If you still want to give jrwiblr a chance, then feel free to lurk and maybe get to know it better before you start to chit chat again. But if you're this attached to the jrwitwt community then you can easily just. Stay there? Like. You don't have to move here. If you don't like our takes then stay on twitter. You don't have to make a fuss abt it. Just say, "this community isn't for me" and move on.

Edit: checked your posts. sorry if this seems like another pile on, you must be getting overwhelmed. take some time away from the platform: drink, rest, eat. so long as you understand what's going on in this community now and promise not to make a take like that again, send any person that bothers you from now on to me. there no reason for this to drag on if you understand what you've done and are aiming to improve.

[lightupmyass]

All Mine

Pairing: Soft-ish Villain! Deku x Reader

Word count: 3852

A/N: Hello everyone! So, this is actually my first time writing in a while, this is an Adult Deku fic, way after they graduated. I've been really lacking motivation lately and this is my first mha fic posted on here, so I hope it doesn't suck 😅. Anyways, I hope you enjoy! Also, this isn't edited so please ignore any mistakes. Its a lot tamer than what I anticipated for Villain Deku but its just a little something to get back intonthe groove of writing.

The longer you sat in the chair, the faster your heart raced, the fear and excitement of what’s to come, the overwhelming feeling of being like prey, uncertainty of how exactly you’re supposed to feel in this situation. Of course, you should be scared, terrified even. You got yourself into quite the dangerous situation, but the excitement of what might happen was too much to ignore. You may have gotten into this position on accident, but you’re here in this room for a reason. This is all your fault, and you’re willing to pay the price for your foolish actions.

You jumped when you heard the door open, your arms instinctively tugging at the rope tied around your wrists as you tried to turn around, but couldn’t. “Oh Doll, don’t be too scared now, just relax.” The soft voice of the man you used to know echoed through the room, taking a different tone as the mood in the room completely changed. You felt calmer, yet even more anxious all at once. This was not the boy you went to school with. This was not the boy who gave you pep talks when you were down, who you admired. This boy, no, this man, was a completely different person. Your body trembled as his hand landed on your shoulder, fingers moving to grab your chin, tilting your head back to look up at him, his green eyes looking into your own with a look you never thought you’d see from him, the look of a predator, a snake, who just caught a little baby bunny.

“You got yourself into quite a pickle, haven’t you Y/N? It wasn’t very smart of you to come after me alone. Did you think you’d be able to talk me out of this? Turn the big bad villain back into the hero he once was? Hm?” He asked, his voice smooth, the stutter he used to have was completely gone. He was, way more confident than he used to be. The power he held over you was intense, and not just his physical strength no, he already knew what you felt for him, and the new and improved Izuku definitely used that to his advantage. You couldn’t even respond properly, only whimpering when his hand trailed back to your neck, his thumb brushing over the sensitive spot directly under your jaw. “No, I don’t think that’s why you’re here. If it was, you would’ve put up more of a fight. Then, what is it? What brought you here?” He leaned down, his mouth right next to your ear. “Tell me, Doll. I’d love to hear your voice. Speak up now, or I might get mad.” He whispers, sending a chill down your spine. “You. I-I wanted t-to see you. I heard about what happened, but I’m not here to try and change your mind." You spit out. He hums curiously, circling around to stand in front of you, kneeling down and resting his hands on your thighs. You have to admit, he’s scarier than any villain you’ve ever stood up against. The calmness he exudes, plus the raw power you know he has, that and the nice dark green suit he’s wearing just makes you feel so small, so powerless against him, you’re definitely trapped.

“Then why did you come here, if not to change my mind?” He asks, staring into your eyes, making you even more anxious. You turn your head away, completely intimidated by the direct eye contact. “I-I wanted to see you. To be honest, I wanted to maybe,” You gulp, hoping that he believes your next words, “help you.” It took a lot of time and effort to make the decision. For years, you were looked down upon by your fellow heroes. You weren’t exactly the toughest fighter, and your quirk, the ability to paralyze people by touching them, was only good if you could get close to someone. You’ve been working hard to train your body to move faster, to catch people off guard and sneak attack them, but no matter how hard you tried it was always by sheer luck that you managed to actually do it. Although you passed the hero course, you felt like you didn’t deserve it. The only way you did was because he was always there, always rooting for you and giving you the strength to work harder. You couldn’t have done it without him, so you feel like you owe him. “You know how hard things have been for me. I’m not very strong, but you’ve always been there for me, and I want to help you too, no matter what side you’re on. I want to help you, be loyal to you in any way I can. Please, let me help you. I promise I’ll do the best I can. “ You tell him, your eyes watering a bit.

He takes a minute to soak it all in before smiling, reaching to cup your cheek. “Oh Doll, I'd love to have you work with me. Your quirk could be a real advantage to me. You’ll be very useful. There’s just one thing you need to do before I let you be my partner.” He says, standing up and walking behind you. “What is it? I’ll do anything. I-I love you, I’ll do anything you want me to, to prove that and my loyalty to you.” You admit, surprising yourself with the sudden confession. “You love me, huh? That’s a bit surprising. Alright then, if you truly love me, then just relax, Doll, and let me make you mine.” He whispers in your ear before leaning down, his hot breathe fanning over your neck before his teeth sink into the soft skin, making you wince and whimper in pain and pleasure before his tongue swipes over it, soothing it. “Please, Izuku. Do whatever you want. I want you to make me yours, please. I’ll be good for you.” You whisper, your pride completely diminished at this point. All you wanted, all you needed, was to be consumed by him, to be taken over by him, to be completely under his control. “That’s what I like to hear, Doll. Just relax now, and tilt your head back, and close your eyes.” He orders softly, you instantly complying. A moment later you can feel silk across your face, his tie most likely, being tied around your head, covering your eyes. “Good girl. This might actually work. As long as you keep listening to me, we shouldn’t have a problem.” He whispers in your ear, his arm wrapping around your chest as his other hand reaches down on your body, fingers teasing the hem of your skirt as your thighs tremble in anticipation.

“I wonder, how long have you wanted this? Everyone always told me you had a crush on me back in high school. Did you dream of this situation?” He asks, placing kisses on your neck as he moves your skirt up, your damp panties exposed to the cold air. “Y-Yes. I did.” You admit sheepishly, never thinking you’d be admitting that to him. “Mm, naughty naughty Doll. I wonder, should I give you what you want, or should I make you earn it? It seems this cute little hole of yours,” He traces his finger over your slit, a small breathy moan escaping your lips as the fabric starts to stick to your folds, your sensitivity heightened from the loss of sight, “is just begging for attention.”

You’re not entirely sure what to do. You feel if you ask him to touch you more, he might see how bad you want it and deny you of it, but if you stay quiet it then he might give you what you want. Its best to just let him do whatever he wants and show how obedient you can be for him. “What did you imagine me doing to you, Doll? I want you to tell me exactly what you wished for all these years. Don’t be shy now.” He says, you can hear the smile in his voice. He’s loving this. You take a deep breath, not taking much effort to remember the things you used to fantasize about. “I-I always thought about you touching me, about how, you would feel going, i-inside of me. Just being a big, messy ball of love and lust with you, getting lost in the feeling of being one with you and being yours.” It felt weird to say it like that, but to you, there was no other way to put it. Its not that you just wanted something physical, you didn’t just want him to completely wreck your shit. You wanted him to love you back, to make you feel like you mattered, like you were worth everything you wanted from him.

“So that’s how it is, huh? Well, today might just be your lucky day. You see, I've been wanting you for a long time too. When we were younger, I wanted to be with you, to support you and make you see your potential. But now, I want more. So much more. I want you, to be mine. I want to break you, mold you and shape you into the perfect partner for me. I will train you, and help you get stronger, maybe even train you to use weapons instead of just relying on your quirk. But, I also want to mess with your mind, play around with you until the second I lay a single finger on you, you’re putty in my hands. Thought something tells me that won’t be too difficult from how much you’re squirming under my touch.” His fingers push your panties to the side, the direct contact of his skin on you overwhelming. No one has ever touched you like this before, and the fact that it was him made it all the more intense as his finger traced up and down your bare slit. “You’re soaked already, Doll. Or, should I call you Puppy, since you’re as loyal as one. You can be my cute little Puppy, my loyal guard dog that won’t let anyone harm me, and I’ll protect you just as much. No one else will ever lay a finger on you. You wanna know why, Puppy?” He asks, you humming questionably in response. “Because from this moment forward, you’re mine, and no one is allow to lay a finger on you, or touch a single hair on you. If they do, I'll beat them to a pulp, and if they survive, they’ll know to never make that mistake again.” He warns, the possessiveness making you happier than it probably should.

“I want you to stand up for me, little Puppy. I’ll untie your hands for just a moment, but they will be tied again, understand?” He says, his fingers already working on the rope that he tied an hour ago. “Yes, Sir.” You say, not thinking about it until you heard him growl behind you, making your entire body tremble. “I like hearing that. I like hearing that a lot. I want you to say that more.” He commands. “Yes sir.” You smile, loving the fact that you made him react like that, that you did something he really liked. It made you really happy that you could make him feel the way he made you feel. As soon as you feel the rope fall away from your bruised flesh, you stood up just as he said, standing there and waiting for his next move. You felt his presence as he moved to stand in front of you, tying the rope back around your wrists, but this time in front of you. Once they were all tied up again, you felt him move, his hands on your hips as he moved you to stand straight, his hands reaching up your skirt to slide your slick panties down your leg, the cool air hitting your core as you step out of them, earning an approving hum from him. “Good girl. Now, sit in my lap and lean back against me. Just relax and let me do what I want.” He says, grabbing your hips to guide you as you sit down, the warmth of his body comforting as you rest against his broad chest, his hands roaming your body before he buries his hand between your thighs, nothing in the way of him getting to your sweet sex. You hold your tied hands close to your chest as he uses two fingers to tease you, circling your aching hole as your head falls back onto his shoulder, your thighs parting to give him better access.

“You’re so wet down here, Puppy. I cant wait to fill you up with my cock. But I need to get you ready first, there’s no way you’d be able to handle it. Gotta stretch you out nice and good.” He says into your ear, slipping the two fingers as deep as they can go inside of you, making you moan out his name as you arch your back, your ass grinding against the hard bulge in his pants. “Fuck.” He groans, wrapping his arm around your stomach to hold you closer to him. “Careful now, Doll, you don’t want me to get too rough now, do you?” He asks, his teeth grazing your neck again as he pumps his fingers into you, his palm brushing against your sensitive bud with each thrust. You don’t respond, because frankly, you’d love for him to lose control, to be rough with you and make you lose your mind. He spreads his fingers inside of you, stretching you out a bit more before slipping a third in there, your body moving again, making him sink his teeth into your neck to hold back a groan. “That’s it. Get up, Puppy, and get on your knees.” He orders, pulling his fingers out of you. You pout as this loss of warmth inside of you, but you di as he says, eager to please him and do whatever he says.

“Now, you’re going to stay nice and still, and keep your mouth open, and let me face fuck you, alright?” He says, standing in front of you. “Yes sir.” You nod, your jaw falling open, obediently waiting to please him. You hear his zipper, the clothes shifting, and before you know it, the hot feeling of his cock brushing against your lips, resting heavy on your awaiting tongue as he hisses at the contact, slowly inching deeper into your mouth. “Ah, fuck Puppy, such a good girl. Take it all in.” He moans, your mouth filling up quickly. You never got to see what it looked like, but his cock is a lot bigger than you expected, your mouth can barely open wide enough to take it. Breathing becomes difficult, but you try your best to breathe through your nose, wishing desperately to see what he looks like from this angle. You’ve waited years for this moment, and now that you’re finally here, you can’t even get to fully enjoy it. But, as long as you’re here, doing what he wants, being useful to him, its more than you ever imagined you’d get, so its best to take what you can.

His hand moves to the back of your head, pushing you down further onto him until you gag around him, a guttural moan rumbling in his throat. “Fuck, that was so good. You look so cute choking on my cock, Puppy. Now, let’s take this pesky thing off. I want you to look at me while I use that slutty little mouth of yours.” He says, untying the tie and letting it fall as your eyes adjust. You whimper as you look up, the image before you better than you could’ve ever imagined. Izuku standing above you, holding your head as he stuffs your mouth with his cock, his cheeks flushed as he bites his lip, the top buttons of his shirt undone to reveal the tones muscle underneath, littered with scars from previous battles. “There we go. You look so beautiful like this, so perfect. Makes me want to ruin you even more.” He smirks, shoving his member back into your mouth, making you gag on it again as tears stain your eyes. “That’s it. Feels so good, Doll. Just relax. You can take it, take it like a fucking champion.” He moans, continuing to thrust into your mouth, your tongue moving around him every now and then, lips tightening around him, anything to make it even better for him. The entire time you keep looking up at him, admiring him, watching as he loses himself, lost in the pleasure you’re giving him. You feel proud, proud that you can do this, make him feel like this, its all because of you. “Ah, Puppy, Puppy you feel so good. I want more, I want so much more.” He groans, pulling out, leaving you a slobbering mess. “Stand up, and face the wall over there. Now.” He says, holding his cock in his hand. You nod, standing up, your legs slightly shaking and your jaw sore, but you still do what you’re told, putting your hands on the wall in front of you and spreading your legs, sticking your ass out without him even telling you. “Well aren’t you doing such a good job? You really are my cute little Puppy, aren’t you? And I'm your Master. Now, stand still.” He says, the feeling of his cock rubbing against your folds making tremble. “Get ready, Doll. Gonna make you mine right here, right now.” He whispers in your ear before pushing inside of you, the feeling overwhelming as you moan loudly, your forehead hitting the cold stone wall as he pushes all the way into you, filling you up completely in just one thrust. “Shit! Ah, so fucking tight! Fuck it feels so good, you feel so good.” He groans, his fingers digging into your hips as his forehead rests against your shoulder.

“Master, please, move. Please fuck me already. Fuck me hard and make me yours.” You beg, wiggling your hips to get some sort of friction. “Mmm, love hearing you beg for it. Careful what you wish for though, Doll. You’re so fragile, it’ll be so easy to break you. But, since you want it so bad, who am I to deny you?” He smiles, placing a kiss on your neck before pulling back, just to slam back in all the way. Out of no where he starts a brutal pace, your body bouncing to meet each one of his thrusts as you get lost in the overwhelming pleasure he’s giving you. Your moans mix with his almost animalistic grunts as he reaches up, grabbing you by the hair and pulling your head back, the mixture of pain and pleasure almost unbearable. “So good, Puppy, its like your pussy was made for me, to be stuffed full of my fat cock. You love it don’t you? Don’t you? I know I do. Love how you’re squeezing me so tight. Fuck, its perfect.” He moans, your bound hands falling down and hanging limp, the only thing keeping your face from hitting the wall being his hand in your hair.

He pulls out for a moment, only to turn you around and pick you up by the back of your thighs, quicker than you can even process before he’s shoving his member back inside of you, your arms wrapping around his neck as he holds you tight against the wall, bouncing your whole body on his cock as he fucks you hard and deep, just like you always wanted. “That’s it, that’s the perfect angle. Look at it, Puppy. Look down and watch me fuck that pretty little hole of yours. Its beautiful, we’re making such a mess.” He says, his forehead resting against yours as you look down to see what he’s talking about. Just seeing it, watching as he disappears inside of you, his shaft covered in your juices, your thighs glistening with the slick, you couldn’t help but get even more turned on. “Its just like you wanted. We’re one, and you’re mine. I’m making your wildest dreams come true, and you’re going to be mine forever. There’s no way I’m letting you go now.” He says, kissing you hard and taking your breath away, the kiss holding so much passion, so much love, than you ever imagined. It made your mind go blank, the only thing you could think of was him, how he felt, how he smelled, how he tasted, his everything, it was all you wanted and more, so much more, it was him, and he was yours now, just as much as you were his. Anyone willing to weasel their way between the two of you would regret it instantly. There was no way you’d let anyone take him away from you. You’d kill them in a heart beat.

“I love you. Don’t want, ah, anyone to take you away. Wanna be yours forever.” You moan, your head resting on his shoulder. “You don’t ever have to worry about that. You’ll be mine forever, that’s a promise, baby.” He says, kissing your cheek before burying his face in the nape of your neck. You could feel it, the welling of love inside of you, the burning in your tummy, the way he pounded against your sweet spot inside of you and the way he grinded against your clit, it was all too much. “Ah, ah fuck, mmm, ‘Zuku.” You moaned, wishing your hands were free so you could grab onto his hair. “That’s it, Puppy. So close, cum with me Puppy. Come on, let me feel you. Do it.” He groans, biting into your shoulder as you cry out his name, tumbling over the edge of you let go, gushing around him as he keeps fucking into you. He groans loudly, his nails digging into your skin as his thrusts halt, the feeling of his warmth filling you up, so much that it leaks out of you, dripping onto his pants as his sweat falls from his forehead onto your shoulder, both of you taking a moment to catch your breathe as he holds you close.

“My god, Doll. Guess you really are mine now, huh? Fuck, I’ve been waiting to do that for years.” He chuckles breathlessly, making you smile. He pulls out of you, a trail of your cum mixed together running down your leg as you tremble, not string enough to hold yourself up. “Careful now, just relax.” He says, sitting down on the ground and pulling you down as well, positioning you to sit between his legs, laying back against him. “Now, who do you belong to?” He asks, fingers running through your hair. “You, sir.” You mumble your eyelids growing heavy. “And who are you going to stand by no matter what?” “You, sir.” You say again. “That’s right. You’re mine now. All mine.”

[dazed--xx]

Beside you

Request: Hello could I have an arranged marriage with Jungkook with a bit of angst but fluff at the end. Thank you xx

Summary: "You may kiss the bride" The hesitation evident on his face. My heart is racing and reality sets in “um…Jungkook?” He rolls his eyes and places a light kiss on my lips. His lips brush against my ear as he whispers “Just know this will be the last time you ever get to kiss me." 

Genre: ANGST, light fluff, smut

TW: None

Word Count: 5,092

A/N: SO i know you specifically asked for fluff at the end but i dont think this is the end of this i might make a part 2 if part 1 gets enough traction any way. I hope you enjoy the few bits i did do from what you asked REQUESTS ARE OPEN 

edit: REWRITE UPLOADED 10/13/2021

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““You may kiss the bride” The hesitation evident on his face. My heart is racing and reality sets in “um…Jungkook?” He rolls his eyes and places a light kiss on my lips. His lips brush against my ear as he whispers “Just know this will be the last time you ever get to kiss me.” Tears begin stinging my eyes, as we walk down the aisle as an officially married couple, hand and hand, much to Jungkook’s dismay. We rush through the double doors of the church and disappear in the car placed in the front if the building of worship.   

Once we got in the car Jungkook retracted his hand and the empty feeling takes over again. Jungkook doesn’t love me this is just a business inconvenience to him. IM just some stupid business deal, something for Jungkook to correct as he does with all his other projects, only difference is I’m not some company he can break apart and sell. I’m a person as much as he refuses to accept it. Since our fathers have agreed the only way Jungkook would be able to acquire and run my father’s company is if I become is wife as some type of fail-safe of preventing Jungkook from selling off the company and running away like he’s done so often after his business dealings. 

At the reception Jungkook disappeared as soon as we walked through the door. To the bar as expected of him to drink as I’m in need of liquid courage to make it through the rest of the night. Slowly I make my way around the room greeting Jungkook’s family, as he sits with the vixen of a bartender, a sensual smile plastered on his face with a rum and coke in his hand. “Y/N you have to tell me… are you and my Jungkookie going to give me grandchildren.” His mother asks smile on her face, excitement evident. I feel the words get caught in my throat, GRANDCHILDREN? WITH HOW HE TREATS ME…...? HELL, NO THAT MAN IS NOT TOUCHING ME. As if on cue my eyes shift to look for Jungkook at the bar but he and the bartender are no longer there. Of fucking course, he took HER somewhere to fuck at OUR wedding.  Almost immediately after your disappointment of a wedding, you’re shipped off on your honeymoon. You spend most days in Mykonos, alone Jungkook wanting to explore Greece with beautiful Greek women.  

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The last night of your honeymoon Jungkook crashes in your shared room drunk off his ass, a loud laugh escaping his lips as he shushes the mirror next to the entrance. “Fuck be quiet Jungkook don’t wake up Y/N remember” He scolds himself. You can hear the childish groan that releases from his lip “No I wanna wake up Y/N.” Your eyebrows furrow, at his drunken figure. Did he not see you on the couch? “Jungkook?” you asked confused. His head whipping around quickly; a huge smile plastered on his face “Y/N!! I got you wine and a couple of more things” He exclaims staggering across the room “I-I shouldn’t be the only one having fun on our honeymoon right” taking a seat right next to you on the couch as he drops a brown bag in your lap. “O-oh um” “Please.... I wanna have fun with you, it’s so boring to keep talking to people I don’t understand and don’t understand me.” You sit there in shock just staring at his openly chatty self “Please take some shots get drunk with me you never let loose” He begs as he reaches in the bag on your lap pulling out some nips.  

After a while you and Jungkook find your drunken selves on the beach, Jungkook laughing as you struggle to walk with the sand beneath your feet. Music rang in the air from one of the clubs near your villa, “Dance with me Y/N” Jungkook exclaims as he grabs your hand pulling you into his frame. His hands finding their way to your waist, guiding them against his hips. A soft groan releases from his lips as your drunken form begins dancing to the music. Turning yourself around pressing your ass against his now hard member.  

Both of you completely oblivious to the sensual way your bodies move against each other. Jungkook's hands firmly placed on your waist, His head resting on your shoulder as your hand reaches behind you. You find your fingers interlocking with his hair. His right hand wrapping around your chin as he angles your head so you are facing him. “I’m having a lot of fun Y/N” lips centimeters apart, the scent of whiskey, and vodka radiating off of him. ‘Brown and clear...You’re gonna have one hell of a day tomorrow Kookie’, you thought. His eyes drift to your lips as he brushes his thumb over your bottom lip. Your lips part slightly, his bottom lip finding its way in between his teeth as he leans in.  

‘He’s drunk Y/N you can’t take advantage of that he would be ignoring you right now if he wasn’t,’ you tell yourself trying to find the strength to reject his advances despite everything inside of you screaming to let him kiss you. 

You pull away quickly “I-I should get to bed I'm really tired” you state shyly as you rush back toward your villa. Jungkook’s trailing behind you, Once you reach your villa he finally speaks “thank you” you turn to look at him confused “F-for what?” 

He smiles “Hanging out with me, I don’t know being my friend even though I don’t really deserve it” You look at him sadly “You’ve been going through a lot being forced to marry someone you don’t love or can't even stand” He furrows his brows as he shakes his head “I can stand you Y/N, What I can’t stand is the fact that my father cares so little about me that he basically sold me off to your family. You had nothing to do with that you were a pawn in this just as much as I was” You nod slightly “I want us to try to be friends again, Jungkook�� He rubs the back of his head looking at the ground “We haven’t been friends this entire time” 

“No idiot I meant like when we were in high school, except for the revenge porn stuff” You state matter of factly. You can see the way Jungkook shifts on his feet, anxious at the memory. “Oh- yeah of course you were my best friend and I really hated losing you like that honestly I was going-” You smile at him softly “Well we should get to bed, you’re really drunk and the past is the past we should leave it there no point in bringing up old possibly painful memories for both of us” You turn yourself around and make your way over to the bedroom in your shared villa. Since, you both have gotten to Greece you have been the one to sleep in the grandiose bed. You can hear Jungkook tossing and turning on the couch, since for the first time in 2 weeks Hes actually sleeping in your shared villa. You make your way out of bed and approach him “You should take the bed Kookie, you'll be really uncomfortable if you don’t and being hungover in an uncomfortable place isn't fun.”  

“N-no” He slurs, “T-the bed I-is for you it’s the least I can do since I’ve been a dick” You shake your head rapidly, yes you were a little tipsy but Jungkook was FADED; You still can’t help the way your heart races at his politeness. “I’ve slept in it every day so far, I don’t mind the couch tonight” Jungkook crosses his arms and pouts “S-so you don’t want to sleep next to me” you stare at him confused “I-I haven’t the whole trip Kook-ah" “I know” the pout on his face staying there “I wanted you to though, I hated waking up in some random room or house with a woman whose name I can’t pronounce” He whispered “Why did you then?”  

He groans as he stands up, grabbing your hand in the process and dragging both of your figures to the room. Jungkook continued to mumble under his breath. You can only catch the last bit of what he’s saying “I want to sleep next to you” you are about to say something when he wraps his arms around your waist and pulls you in to the large bed. “I want to hold you” He drunkly confesses “We used to cuddle all the time before; now you don’t even look at me and I hate it.” Youre stuck in a trance as he rubs circles on your waist. “I miss you Y/N I was so happy when my –hiccup- dad told me I was marrying you.” “You treated me like trash the whole time” you mutter. “I didn’t want to fall in love with you again, you only get hurt when I do” he whispers. “Jungkoo-” Your statement is cut off by his light snores and shallow breaths; He’s sleeping.  

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After your honeymoon you and Jungkook’s relationship has improved. He helped you move your things into the home his parents bought for us. Honestly none of us could even believe Jungkook actually came to the wedding let alone stayed in the house were supposed to share. 

 I’ve taken over the second bedroom to gain some solace from the hurricane that is his temper. There were days I would be greeted with Jungkook’s beautiful smile and the calmness would contain me. Others I’d walk out of my room and have a foreign object thrown in my direction. Jungkook and I would hang out on those days and talk until the sunset. Every morning I would have a cup of Jungkook’s favorite tea ready and set for him to begin his day properly.   

One morning I woke up extremely early, honestly at an ungodly hour. Tonight, was a particularly bad night, after our drunken adventure in Greece, Jungkook's drunken form rarely sought me out. Tonight, I figured would be no different. Until Jungkook came in the house and began taking his anger at our situation out on me. “YOU! YOU FUCKING DID THIS TO ME. YOURE THE REASON I CAN’T LIVE MY DAMN LIFE FUCK Y/N WHY CAN’T YOU MAKE THIS EASIER FOR ME AND DISAPPEAR” He shouted at you, deciding it was best to just ignore him and go to your bedroom. I can hear as he slams his bedroom door behind him.  

 After many attempts to fall asleep fail, I decide to go for a walk. As I run out the door, the world outside takes me over. I didn’t even realize how long it actually has been since I’ve left the house alone. The autumn wind rushing through the air as you make your way down the street. I find my mind drifting back to the days before your family informed you of the dowery. Jungkook hates you for being his wife but loves you for being his friend. I don’t understand anymore. My feet just move as I drift deeper into thought.  

The emotions I’ve been holding in begin to flow out as the tears burn my eyes. Finally feeling the pressure and change from this marriage. Losing track of time as I sit on a bench looking out to the Han River. The water is peaceful. The sounds of the city embrace me as I stare into the sunset. I don’t notice the hours pass until I begin to see traffic in the park pickup. I stand from my place on the bench and walk toward the bridge. Staring over the edge you contemplate jumping. Making everything easier on everyone. You feel utterly lost as the tears rush down your face. Shaking your head rapidly “no” you tell yourself as you make your way back, back to Jungkook, back to the life I no longer feel like leading.   

As the house came into view, and I saw 2 unfamiliar cars in the driveway. “Jungkook-ah I’m back is anyone he-” I shout as I walk into the house only to be cut off by the impact of Jungkook’s body colliding with mine. His breathing is heavy and a sigh of relief escapes him. His hands rushing to either side of my head as he looked me up and down. His chest heaving up and down rapidly. His eyes full of tears that were threatening fall. 

 “Fuck I thought something happened to you” he says examining my face. “Where were you? I woke up and tried to see if you wanted to go get breakfast and you weren’t answering the door, so I opened it and you weren’t there your bed is made where’d you sleep? I called your dad, man. I called MY dad” He doesn’t remember what he said to you last night. I smile at him apologetically as I notice the 2 men on the couch and I give them a polite bow. “I’m sorry Kook-ah I woke up really early and chose to go for a walk. I lost track of time and only made it home just now I’m okay; both of you did not need to take time out of your day to come here” you gesture toward your fathers. You can see Jungkook's father is completely stoic and uncaring, you avoid your fathers gaze as his figure trembled on the couch. 

“Y/N” Your father states just barely above a whisper as he looks you up and down “Dad I'm fine” You look at him, understanding his pointed worried gaze. “Y/N the last time you couldn’t sleep and went out for a walk I found you bleeding from your wrists in our neighbors pool” You can feel Jungkook's worried gaze on you. The awkwardness from the conversation growing around the room.  

“did that happen this time? and you have no right bringing that up it is a completely different situation” Your words do nothing to soothe him as you shove past Jungkook and lift your sleeves in his face “I’m fucking fine” You rush over to your front door slamming it open “Please excuse yourself, I'm tired and would like to go to bed after explaining to the husband YOU forced me to marry why I tried to kill myself, I apologize Mr. Jeon you did not have to take time out of your busy day to come here” Jungkook scoffs and mummers something under his breath. I walked the men out of the door, ignoring Jungkook’s hard stare at the back of my head as I said my goodbyes and apologized again.  

“Y/N” he whispered, you stood frozen in place at the front door. “What happened? Why’d your dad-” “It’s not particularly your business or your problem honestly Jungkook you’ve made it quite clear how you feel about me last night.” You cut him off curtly, finally making your way toward your bedroom “Y/N I was drunk last night I didn’t-” “WHAT ABOUT ALL THE OTHER NIGHTS” I shout “Look Jungkook, with the exception of our ‘honeymoon’ you don’t even want me around you drunk. You can’t stand to look at me and the ring on my finger knowing you got sucked into something you never wanted to do” Jungkook stood in his spot, trembling, “Y-Y/N it’s not like that-” “I don’t care anymore, honestly” You state curtly.  

“I'm your friend Y/N, do you not understand how fucking worried I was when I realized you weren’t here and I had no clue where you would go” I scoff at his statement “Maybe if you actually put effort into this ‘friendship’ You would have known” A pout forms on his already saddened face. “You’re right I should be a better friend to you and I will be” He promises.  

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Since that day, a few months back; Jungkook requests for me to let him know that I will be leaving so he does not start another panic; We’ve also dedicated Fridays as our friend date night, which usually just consists of us hanging out at our shared house watching movies and playing video games. As I exit the shower, Jungkook stops me as I walk toward my room “Hey, do you want to go out with me tonight?” Jungkook asks shyly. My heart sored at the question; I know he wasn’t asking in any romantic way. I just couldn’t help but get excited at the thought of leaving the house. I hadn't left much since moving in typically spending my days home or working, no time to really explore and go out “Yes! I mean yeah sure that sounds fun” I exclaim. After I have my hair out, in a wet curly look and throw on the most beautiful form fitting dress that I own and make my way to the door. Jungkook is standing there waiting on his phone. His eyes slowly scan up me and he swallows harshly as his eyes grow wide. “Uhm… Let’s…”  I smile at him and grab his hand and pull him out of the house interrupting him “Let’s go Jungkookie”   

The club was fun, Jungkook told me to have as much fun as I want since I rarely go out. Even so, I never leave the bar as Jungkook can obviously spot someone so he excuses himself from me exclaiming he will be back in like 10 minutes and runs off to the dance floor. Anxious about the crowd and my sudden loneliness; I pull myself into a dark corner at the end of the bar drunk patrons around me oblivious to presence. Feeling a hand on my ass and turn to see an unfamiliar handsome face. “Hey, um sorry to sound rude but can you like take your fucking hand off of me” I say shyly.  

The handsome man smiles and nods as he quickly pulls his hand off of my bottom “Sorry, I couldn’t get my footing with all the people I didn’t mean to…like touch you there I swear, I’m Mark” “Y/N” I say as I reach my hand out. He smiles and shakes my hand.” What are you drinking” He smiles “Malibu Pineapple” I reply politely. Mark orders me another and soon I’m feeling tipsy. His kind flirty personality only making you even more flustered, He smiles and places his hand on the small of your back as you talk. You check your phone only to see Jungkook has been gone for the better part of an hour; Mark’s deep voice pulling me out of my trance “SO… I hate to be THAT guy but are you here alone?” My eyes drift from my phone, my bottom lip pulled between my teeth. “Oh I-” 

Before I can respond I feel a hand snake around my waist and the melodic voice I’ve come to secretly love comes from behind me “No she’s here with me…… her husband” Jealousy laced in his voice as he pulls me closer to him. “And were supposed to be having a good time together…without you”   

“Sorry man, I didn’t know she was married. You know…since she was standing here by herself for a while, and it looked like she didn’t seem to mind spending time with me” Mark smirks sarcastically. The anger is growing more and more evident on Jungkook’s face. “Excuse me?!?” Mark shifts and smiles to me ignoring Jungkook’s ever growing angry form. “You trying to go somewhere less crowded you look really uncomfortable with how many people are here” “Oh I don’t know” I state shyly, stepping back a little. “What Y/N I'm just trying to be nice ill bring you home. I just don’t trust this guy you know? Who leaves their wife alone in a bar like this for over an hour?” It's obvious that was the last straw as Jungkook pulls me behind him as he punches Mark in the face. Mark returns the blow, Jungkook's large form stumbling back at the power the other man had. “You want to keep talking shit asshole” Jungkook's loud voice rings out as he charges Mark again. I stood frozen in place from Jungkook's forceful grab. The bar hitting my back.  Soon security was separating the brawl and me and Jungkook were in the car on our way back to the house.   

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In the passenger seat I take in the details of Jungkook’s now bruised face. I shift my eyes back to the windshield, a pout evident on my face “Why was he with you, Y/N?” Jungkook questions the tone in his voice is obviously a sad and jealous one. “He just came up to and we started talking he bought me a couple drinks that’s all Kookie, I promise.” I whine. It’s happened on occasion after Jungkook swore to make up for not being a good friend to you; you guys would flirt and be all over each other, yet neither would make a real move. “Would you have gone home with him? Would you have let him fuck you?” He asks scared of the answer. “WHAT? NO! Jungkook-ah I swear nothing like that would have happened. I mean Mark was really attractive and I’m sure he would have shown me a great time but I just wasn’t interested in him, kookie” That answer seems to have settled him for now. The drive now growing silent. “Y-y/n?” Jungkook slurs “Yeah” “You ever thought about it?” “What?” I ask confused. “Sex, with me” He asks shyly. “Um Jungkook? How drunk are you did you-” “No that doesn’t count I mean recently?” He stammers out.  

“Honestly?” He nods rapidly “Yes I need you to tell me the truth because I'm gonna kiss you and I'm not trying to get slapped” He confesses. My eyes widen at his drunk confession “Oh I wouldn’t slap you if you kissed me” He smiles slightly “really? Would you stop me if I touched you like I want Baby?” lust filling his tone as his hand placed itself inside your thigh slowly rubbing up toward my core. A small whimper is released from my lips. He takes his bottom lip between his teeth. “You want me to stop y/n?” He asks cockily. I shake my head rapidly. “You want my fingers inside you don’t you baby?” I nod rapidly. 

 “Don’t worry baby girl I’ll do that for you.” he says as he pulls into the driveway. He runs to the passenger door and opens it for me as I get out and wrap my arms around him. “Oh yeah Kookie? Are you gonna make me cum for you?” I smirk the drunk naughty thoughts take over. Jungkook wraps his arms around my waist and for the first time tonight I smell the alcohol coming off Jungkook. He’s as drunk as I am or even more so, he presses his chest against my back and I feel a hard shaft against my ass. He peppers kisses up the side of my neck until his lips reach my ears “mmm Baby girl, I wanna eat your pussy so bad” He smacks my ass harshly as he lifts me and carries me into the home.   

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I wake up in Jungkook’s bed the next morning, events from last night come rolling in. We had sex, 4 times, I notice the coldness on the side of the bed from me. I make my way out of Jungkook’s room and dash toward the kitchen. Jungkook is sitting at the table on the phone back to the entrance. “I don’t know Jimin we fucked like 4 times Jimin but that’s all she helped me cum and I helped her that’s all it was” “No I don’t have feelings for her, we used each other Jimin, it wasn’t like that this guy was talking to her at the club and she told me she wasn’t going to go home with him but let’s be honest if I wasn’t there, she would have gone with him and I can’t have some slut for a wife” 

 “No man I just helped her cum so she doesn’t start going out for some rando guy to get her off she doesn’t really expect anything from it. She just wanted to cum that’s how good little whores do it and from last night I know she’s one of the best sluts I’ve ever met so easy to get her to do anything for me cause she’s a sub” “Look I got to go Jimin before she gets up, I got to get he out of my bed before she thinks I want her there all the time…. dude of course I’m gonna fuck her again it’s one of the best pussies I’ve ever had……your stupid dude bye”   

I rush to my room and lock the door. His words stab at my heart. Just some easy slut? That’s what he thought you were, because you let your guard down and gave yourself to the first person you’ve ever had sex with. Tears stream down my face as I hyperventilate a knock at my bedroom pulls me out of a trance. “Y/n-ie?” another knock “you, okay?” I shout from behind the door. 

 “Yeah…I’m fine” I hear slight shuffling “Did you want to go to breakfast maybe we can take a walk to Han River you said you like going there right?” His nervousness is evident through the door. “Um…Honestly Jungkook, I’m not feeling too good I’m like really hungover and I’d like to take a shower” to wash your scent and touch off of me. “Oh…. well can I join you then?” I shake my head no, god please no. “Y/N-ie? Babe?” my heart shatters at his words “Um I’m sorry Kookie but I really don’t feel like it” “Oh okay, um when you’re done can you come hang out and watch a that Invisible Man movie you wanted to see” “Um sure I’ll see you in a bit bye Jungkook” Jungkook’s face twists in to a pout behind the door.  

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After your shower you leave the room and walk down the hall “Jungkook?” before I pass his bedroom, I peak my head in and see Jungkook laying on his bed completely naked, eyes closed tight, stroking himself, moaning out your name. The sight is addicting I feel my own excitement building up at the sight of him. I try to back out of the room and accidentally slam into Jungkook’s bedroom door. His eyes shoot open and his hand leaves his member. “Y/N! I…UM…I WAS JUST….” I smile and walk toward him. “We’re you thinking about me Jungkook” I teased. He bites his lip “Were you thinking about last night or the fact that you missed fucking me hard into the shower” He sighs and nods “both” he mutters. His words from earlier out of my mind as I place my lips against his and let him take me for the 5th time in 24 hours.   

The way he pounds into me, his hair stuck to his forehead. “Fuck baby girl you take it so good, look at your pretty pussy taking this cock the way you should…. hmmm that’s my pussy baby girl” I moan in response “yes kookie-ah only yours” My climax builds fast as Jungkook’s thrusts get sloppy. “Yeah, oh baby girl I’m gonna cum so deep in your pussy” He exclaims as he captures his lips into mine. “All mine baby girl” he thrusts once more and I feel a warmth inside me as he kisses my neck.   

He gets up and runs to the bathroom. A loud ping comes through on the phone

   Areum<3: When are you going to divorce that ugly ass wife? Baby I got to spend time with you at the club but fucking in a bathroom then getting kicked out for a fight especially over her is crazy.  

My breath hitches and swells up in my throat as I read the message. He had sex with someone last night right before he had sex with me, he took my mouth last night. Disgust fills me up as I run to my bedroom. Opening the closet, I begin throwing my things in the luggage bag. “Baby did you want- what are you doing?!” Jungkook stopped at my door, a confused look on his face. 

 “I’m leaving Jungkook” I state as tears stream down my face. Panic rises on Jungkook’s face “why? You don’t want to be here anymore? Did I do something? I can fix it I swear but you can’t go…you can’t just go when we….” “Areum misses you and you should focus on one girl Jungkook-ah” I cut him off and realization dawns on his face as he runs to his room to grab his phone.

 The second the phone is in his hand he rushes out of his room and sees your retreating figure making your way to the door “Y/N-AH! DON’T GO PLEASE” You freeze the sound of his voice cracking “Areum is just some girl she’s not anyone don’t just assume because some girl texted me, she misses me that I’m going to run to her” “You were with her last night….you Fucked her last night not even an hour before you fucked me, my mouth” 

Jungkook shakes his head “No it’s not like that I swear like you said I fucked her, Baby girl I can’t fuck you. I make love to you please I’m begging you don’t go okay I know we haven’t been the best but I can fix this don’t do this not when I know I love you please” I shake my head and make my way to the door as Jungkook’s sobs grow. “Stop please” he reaches for the door and slams it shut. “You can’t just leave, not after what we just did, not when I love you, please” I smile at him lightly and press my lips against his.

 I feel his hands snake around my waist as he kisses me hard. I lose myself in his lips soon I reach for my luggage bag and rush out the door and into my car. Jungkook is banging on my passenger side window trying to open the door tears streaming down his face “please, stop, stop the car, get out please stay with me, BABY PLEASE” he shouts as I reverse and drive off the last sight, I have is Jungkook chasing my car with tears streaming down his face   

[dontreadthistrashgarbage]

G O T 7 PT.12

Guerin trotted up to JB's studio door with Eneoji and entered the code he had sent her. JB looked up as she came in, "Jagi, I wasn't expecting you so soon."

"I found a taxi that would take Eneoji, so I didn't need to drop her at home first." She gave him a kiss in greeting and detached the leash. JB grinned as Eneoji wiggled up to him and gave her an affectionate face squish and kiss on the nose before petting her. Guerin's heart swelled as she watched their interaction, settling into the chair next to JB at his desk. Once their greeting was finished Eneoji occupied herself by sniffing around the unfamiliar room and JB swiveled around back to the computer, with a glance at Guerin.

"Are you nervous?" He asked raising his brows over a crooked smile.

Guerin rubbed her knees and laughed almost shyly at his callout, "Yeah I think a little, but I'm also excited."

"Let's watch it then." He pulled up the email that showed two private links, one labeled as the music video and the other just said "watch after".

"What's that?" Guerin asked, pointing at the mysterious message.

"I don't know yet. I guess we'll find out after." JB shrugged and clicked the first link. Maximizing the video he sat back and took Guerin's hand to watch. It followed the storyline they had filmed; meeting, dating, the jealousy and the makeup, all interspersed with Mihi flying or the two of them playing with her. Once it was over Guerin clapped.

"Wow, BamBam did really amazing! Isn't he in the restaurant business? How is he so good?" She gushed.

"He pretty much hired people to run stuff for him, he does video editing as a part time hobby." JB grinned at her reaction, "That turned out better than I thought. His changes were good. You did great too, you looked amazing."

"I mean yeah compared to now." She joked about her post-workout appearance.

"I like you like this too." He took her hand again and met her gaze.

It was too intense for Guerin and she gave a crooked smile before changing the subject, "Let's check out that second link." She suggested suddenly.

JB stares at her for a moment with knowing smile before allowing himself to be distracted. Clicking on the mysterious link brought up another video.

"Behind the scenes?" Guerin read outloud curiously, exchanging a glance with JB before they refocused on the screen. The first few seconds were of Guerin talking, explaining to BamBam the concept of Free Flight. Her words continued as the screen flashed through different scenes of them filming, making mistakes and laughing, JB teasing Guerin and making goofy expressions.

"I had no idea he was recording." Guerin covered her mouth, embarrassed.

Back on the screen was a goofy dance off Guerin had started with Yugyeom before she tagged in JB as she was clearly in over her head. The scenes of Guerin laughing at her phone while JB teased her. The mood subtly changed. The smiles they shared with each other became softer, the reactions as they separated filming scenes they physically touched became shy, sweet even. JB's voice replaced Guerins.

"We're always learning. If we aren't open for improvement we become stagnant. People in our loves either feed that growth or they starve it." The scene changed to the actual moment JB was talking. He wasn't looking at the camera, but behind it, most likely at BamBam. Guerin glanced at JB who looked surprised and a bit anxious.

In the video Guerin was in the background playing with Mihi and JB glanced back at her with a small smile. He didn't say anything for a moment and the scene changed to an outtake from them goofing off when JB's voice cut in again, "I feel like every time we're together we learn something. So it's pretty easy to pretend I'm falling in love with someone I'm actually falling in love with." The scene changed back to a shyly smiling JB before he looked seriously at BamBam, "Don't tell her I said that."

The video wrapped up with a few more outtakes but the two sat someone shocked in silence as the video wrapped up. Guerin was positive she could hear BamBam cackling as he put together this extra content. Her heart felt like it was going to beat out of her chest, it was such a cheesy line but it was so cute and delivered in such a heartfelt way she could feel herself weakening.

"You didn't want me to hear that?"

"No..." JB said, covering his face, "I'm gonna kill him."

"Technically he didn't tell me." Guerin said unhelpfully trying not to smile. JB leaned back sucking in air through his teeth.

"Hey come on. It's not that bad. It's a teensy bit tacky but actually really sweet and moving." Guerin reached for him, patting his shoulder reassuringly as JB groaned.

"He already sent this to JYPE. We can stop it from getting approved and posted since it hasn't dropped yet." JB said, dropping his head to the side to look at Guerin.

"I dunno. It's actually kinda cute. Maybe people will find it endearing." Guerin shrugged, "If you think it's a problem then stop it, but if I was a fan this kind of stuff would get me super excited."

JB looked nonplussed, so Guerin stood and moved his beanie to kiss his forehead, "Babe you do what you want with it. I'll leave you to your work. I've got a meeting with Jisoo and training with HEET this afternoon so I've got to head out."

As she moved away JB took her wrist and tugged gently. She looked down at his pout and he tapped his lips. Failing to hold in a smile she bent down and kissed him sweetly.

"I got you, Jinri!" JB scooped up the toddler and spun her around as she squealed in joy. He playfully tossed her up, making her scream happily.

"Careful, sweetie." Guerin couldn't help but feel cautious, even if she could see the little girl loved the game.

"She likes it!" JB said, but he obliged her and instead sat on the floor with Jinri and made silly faces with her.

"He is so amazing with her." Charlie sat down cross legged next to Guerin, "It must make you feel all soft." She knew her friend well.

Guerin looked down and smiled. Seeing JB with animals and with children was an extreme soft spot of hers. It had been over a year since the tour with HEET and they were already preparing for another one.

"It definitely makes it harder to go." Guerin admitted, "But work is work. And I do like working with HEET. They're like my sons, I'm so proud of all of them."

"Seungbin has gotten so big! I remember when he was just a baby. He's turning into quite the handsome man." Charlie gushed fondly.

"Why are you talking about another man like that?" Jinyoung fake pouted, joining the two women on the floor. He had just returned from his trip to the store to join the conversation.

"Are you actually pretending to be jealous of a seventeen year old?" Guerin teased.

"I don't want Charlie to see anyone but me." Jinyoung made no effort to hide his smile as he pulled his wife toward him and kissed her head.

Jinri pulled away from JB and headed toward the trio. He called after her and collapsed on the floor from her rejection as Jinri left him. Guerin couldn't help but laugh at the exaggerated expression of hurt on his face. Jinri climbed into Jinyoung's lap and gazed at him lovingly, "Appa." She seemed excited to see her dad. Jinyoung's face hid none of his joy as he immediately cuddled his daughter close, he didn't need words to express his obvious adoration as he cooed at her lovingly while she giggled when he smothered her face with kisses.

"This is so cute I might vomit." Guerin gushed.

"Imagine how I feel." Charlie might as well have actual heart eyes as she watched the two of the interact.

JB sat down next to Guerin, putting his arm around her shoulder and watching his dongsaeng with a jealous expression, "When do we get one of those?" He asked with a pout.

Guerin's eyes widened as she swung to look at him, "Excuse me?" She was surprised into english. Fortunately his biligunal abilities had expanded enough that he understood her shock.

"She's so cute." He pulled Guerin close, staring at Jingyoung's now smug expression with a covetous look of his own, "Let's get one."

"Yeah let's just adopt one right now." Guerin rolled her eyes, trying to cover the palpitations of her heart.

"If you think adoption is faster, let's do it." He responded.

"Don't you think you're missing a step?" Charlie raised an eyebrow at the petulant man and the flabbergasted woman in his arms.

"Well we obviously are going to get married." JB shrugged, "And I'll buy a house for us."

"Okay wait hold up. This is a whole conversation I'd like to be a part of? There's a lot of decisions being made without me despite me being a key player." Guerin said, flustered.

"You don't want kids with me?" JB asked, looking surprised.

"I didn't say that I just... timing and... ability and space... and... JB THIS IS NOT THE PLACE." She protested finally, covering her face.

JB laughed, "Okay, we'll work out the details later." He said as he kissed her temple.

Jinyoung looked at Charlie with a raised brow, "What just happened?"

"Pretty sure they just got engaged and pregnant." Charlie said, holding her arms open for her daughter, who eagerly jumped to her mom.

"Shut up." Guerin said in a muffled voice from behind her hands, a rare blush reddening what little of her face was visible. She peaked up at JB who shrugged.

"It sounds like a plan to me." He said.

"This is the weirdest engagement ever." Jinyoung said.

"It suits them." Charlie said matter of factly about her two friends.

END