#Electronic Id cards

[studentcares123]

high quality plastic id card

We offer a simple solution for your ID card needs. Design the card online using one of our templates. Enter the data. Upload the photo. Receive a high-quality plastic ID card by mail.

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[asiancatboy]

got my new license 🥳

[fireproofphoenix]

Look if I've told you multiple times to keep your room key away from electronics so it doesn't demagnetize and you come up to the desk complaining your key never works and then proceed to pull the key card out of your phones case I'm sorry I have few fucks to give for your complaint.

[aichls]

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[ashknife]

I see posts every now and then talking about how library books and electronic resources are free, so get a card and start using them.

Well, no. They aren't free. You've been paying for them, albeit indirectly.

I've been working in an academic library since 2002, first as a student assistant, then since 2006 as a full-time paraprofessional. I work in serials and handle tasks like managing proxy servers and developing web pages so people can get to our electronic resources. In May 2024, a little over a year from now, I will be receiving a Master of Science in Information Science, which will let me bear the title of librarian. I've seen a lot of price tags not thrown out to the public eye.

Services like Kanopy, Libby, and Flipster are great in that they deliver a ton of content to library patrons so long as they have a library card or other official means of identifying themselves as a patron of the subscribing library. For many public libraries, that would be the library card. For a lot of academic libraries, it is usually tied to a school email or a student ID number. However, they are subscriptions. They cost the subscribing library a lot of money. For my library, which serves a population of a couple thousand students, staff, and faculty, these services would cost us $20k-$40k per year each. For larger libraries and consortiums, the cost is even greater. The state of Texas has a statewide library collective that provides a suite of research databases. Each member library chips in a small amount. Taken all together, the suite costs tens of millions of dollars per year.

These subscriptions are a steal, but they are not free. A great deal you can't afford is still something you can't buy. Not every library can afford Kanopy. My library cannot. The public library down the street from me cannot. The larger libraries a few counties over can. Public libraries receive money from the local and state governments, and those funds are supplied from property, income, and sales taxes. Public academic libraries receive state funding and money from tuition and fees; private academic libraries receive money from tuition and fees. The larger the school, or the larger the city, the larger the budget.

In a time when budgets are shrinking and prices are going up, the money you and your peers indirectly supply to your library may someday not be enough, and those services you enjoy can go away. Do you like Kanopy? Use it. Do you like Flipster? Use it. Do you like your JSTOR or EBSCO access? Use them. When libraries have to make cuts, they prioritize things that are not used to cut first. It's great that these things are provided to you with no upfront fee, but you are still paying for them. Use what you're paying for so that libraries know what is worth keeping. Not only that, advocate to your city and state representatives to adequately fund these institutions.

[freetheshit-outofyou]

Last week I got pulled over for speeding, I was in fact speeding 7 over.

Anyway, I was pulled over. As is normal I had my CCW and it was tucked in my seat. No point it trying to draw from an IWB holster in a vehicle, to much to snag on if you have too. So, I tuck the pistol in the seat of whatever I'm driving and I make sure it is visible.  Keeping it visible is important here because Nevada is a open carry state and as such with it carried in the open there is no CCW Permit disclosure requirement if asked for it. If it is concealed and the LEO asks for your permit you are required to produce the permit and a second form of ID. With it in the open and asked to identify myself, in Nevada, I need only give my name (Hiibel v. Sixth Judicial District Court of Nevada, 542 U.S. 177 (2004)), unless you are being lawfully detained.

As I said I was pulled over for speeding, so I was already required to produce driver's licence, proof of registration and insurance. When they ran the "Rolling 28" (10-28, Vehicle Registration Information) dispatch would have informed them that I had a Nevada CCW permit so they already knew that.

Things I knew were going to happen. I was going to be asked to get out of the vehicle. I was going to more than likely be patted down, cuffed and placed in the NHP car and they would attempt to run my firearms S/N. Firearms are a crazy gray area in search and seizure laws because unlike just about anything else that could be sitting in your car the law give LEO's a bit of latitude when it comes to firearms.

Let me explain:

In this case I was pulled over for a traffic violation, my vehicle is open and viewable under "Plain View Doctrine", the LEO can see my firearm and because of this they "can", take my firearm, lock and clear it under the guise of "Officer safety". I've done it time after time, it;'s a thing. Technically the LEO cannot run the S/N unless there is probable cause that a crime has been committed, BUT under "Plain View Doctrine" the S/N is there when they lock and clear the firearm soooooo. Kind of an end around the 4th Amendment'ish.

Now let's say you have a box of Iphones and other assorted electronics sitting in your front seat the LEo is expressly prohibited from doing any search of those items without probable cause and a warrant. See the gray area there, and there is very little case law in the area.

Moving on, as expected when the NHP came to the passenger side of my truck he saw the pistol, asked questions about it that I did not answer while handing him my DL, CCW card, Insurance and registration. He took them, but dropped them in the passenger seat then asked me to step out of the truck. As I did he stepped to the back of my truck, hand on his firearm to watch me get out. But before I got out I put up my windows, locked the doors and dropped the keys on my drivers seat then closed the door.

The NHP had me walk back to his car where I was patted down and cuffed and put in the car. Now, I admit I had a big shit eating grin on my face as the NHP walked to my drivers side door, not the passenger side where he dropped all my ID and documents, pulls the handle and it gave that hallow "Thunk" as the handle slipped out of his hand when the door did not open. He tried two more times before walking back to me and asking where they keys were. I told him they were on the front seat. He went back, looked, tried the door handle two more times like their was some kind of magic that would unlock it. He came back again and said I need you to unlock your truck, I asked why? He said so he could check my firearm, NOT so he could  get my ID and documents. I said I could not and was under no obligation to unlock the vehicle for him to search at this point. If he needed to get in my vehicle now that I was out of it and it was locked he would need a warrant to open it. It was right then the light turned on over his head, he knew that I knew what he was trying to do.

He looked me dead in the face and said "You know it doesn't need to be like this, you can just open the truck." At some point around this point NHP #2 shows up. They are peppering me with questions, most of then I did not answer.  I gave them my full name, address, DL number, and SSN all of which they confirmed and I had no wants or warrants, but NHP #1 still wanted in my truck.  He asked if he could search my truck and I said no.  Both the Troopers went to my truck talking back and forth, looking in and walking all around it. Eventually they came back to me with more questions. At this point I'd been out of my truck, in cuffs, and in the patrol car about 20 minutes so I asked the one question they hate to hear "Am I being detained?" Both of their heads snapped at me.  This is an important question because if you are being detained it changes things, the LEO feel they have enough Reasonable Suspicion Based on Articulable Facts that you have committed, are committing, or are about to commit a crime. It also means they should be able to articulate that fact to a judge to get a warrant, or the other end around, enough probable cause to impound the vehicle then it has to be inventoried then they get in the car anyway. Again, I asked am I being detained, if I am then what for.  NHP #1 said I need your documents to check them, I asked him directly "Am I free to go?" He said, not until He got my ID and documents, to which I said then we should get to the station because I was not opening the truck. Admittedly I slipped up here and gave away my hand, I said, that under "Mendenhall" (United States v. Mendenhall, 446 U.S. 544 (1980) I either had to be officially detained, like I was in the car and cuffed and processed OR I was free to go. It did not feel like I was free to go in the back of the car in cuffs with two troopers standing in front of me.

Now a Lyon County K9 unit shows up, NHP #1 says we're going to run the dog around your truck if there are no issues you are free to go. I smile hearing this. This sets the check point you need in any interaction with LEO's. Because, at this point they are still fishing for probable cause beyond the initial stop for speeding. Without being able to directly search the truck they need a dog to "hit" to give them probable cause to compel a search. Also important at this checkpoint, anything after this point cannot be ruled as probable cause for the initial stop and is not admissible as such for the initial reason for the stop. The dog did not hit. NHP #1 said he was giving me a warning for speeding and to slow down.

NHP #1 got me out of the car, uncuffed me, gave my my wallet and pocket knife back they took in the pat down, and with glee in his voice said "Do you need me to call a locksmith?" Before I could answer NHP #2 asked if I was a lawyer or a cop? I said I was an LEO for almost 20 years. They both said why didn't you just say that "Because we could have avoided all of this.". I asked why should I have need to?

Again, with a smirk on his face NHP #1 asked if I needed a locksmith and said no, reached under the wheel well and pulled out the hide-a key and got in.

Important side note here:

Because the interaction with the NHP's had concluded, they had executed a stop and I had been released without establishing an entirely new "probable cause"  they still could not get in my truck and they knew I knew they couldn't do anything about it.

Check and Mate.

I encourage all of you to learn the laws where you are and how they play into your everyday "Casual" encounters with LEo's and "Terry Stop" contacts. (Terry v. Ohio, 392 U.S. 1 (1968)) It is important that you understand the LEO's are under no obligation to tell you what your RIGHTS are. That if you don't know your RIGHTS silence is your first, best defence.

[he-goes-down]

There Was A Time:

fic chapters,warnings, ext

SORRY IF THIS IS SO CONFUSING I APOLOGIZE

1. Move To The City:

Warnings:

Implied sexual acts

Drinking

Time travel (confusing)

Second person POV:

All the things that you just experienced had been forgotten in an instant. It felt like nothing had happened.

But everything happened.

You cursed under your breath, you're about to miss the band playing and you haven't even said good luck or more importantly get the roadies and other technical teams managed. 'Shit. what if they're not even ready?' You thought to yourself in a panic. You started rummaging through your satchel to find your phone for any missed calls and to check how late it is. Everything else was in your bag; notebook, passport, ID and documents. But no phone and a wallet with only one card and loads of cash. Instead of a phone there was a Walkman and your handwriting on it spelling out: 'Best Tunes'. "What the fuck" You whispered under your breath. Who still uses a Walkman? And why do I have one? Why the cringy ass title? You thought. Anything and everything was going through your head. You searched the windows of the shops on the street just for a glimpse of a clock or anything, but all of them were closed. One of the shops windows glowed, an electronic shop, every kind of tv was there and playing the same thing. Box TV's. No smart TV's. 1 or 2 flat screens. The news is on but it's grainy and the presenters aren't the same. The time.

'8:45' it read on the top left of one of the screens.

28th February 1985.

Headache. High pitch ring.

You nearly fell back onto the pavement.

Your head kept pounding.

Your face scrunched as you pierced your eyes shut.

Scenes of past memories came flooding back and replacing the ones you had, but they were both still in your mind, just supressed.

'Fuck, what was I doing?'

You searched your bag again, this time taking out a little notebook. You always had things to do written down in case you forgot something important. 'Find new band' it wrote and under it was suggestions on which bars to search. Luckily you could hear the thumbing bass of a band playing down the street in one of the bars. The Whisky a Go Go. As you walked closer you heard the song getting clearer and the higher frequencies the guitar was producing. The drums were hard driving, it nearly made you shake ass in the middle of the street. The guitar wind and you noticed there was another that kept the rhythm. The bass made something in you tingle. You finally got to the entrance of the bar, it was packed in the front of the stage and the booths but there were about only two people sitting on the bar stools, it was dark, the bright lights shone on the stage and only a dark dim light was provided at the bar for bartenders to be able to make drinks. You sat down by one of the stools closest to the exit, sitting your small suitcase in front of your stool under the bar top. The band was loud, and the crowd was going wild, the mics and speakers weren't good quality, but you could feel the raw energy from when their instruments were struck and when the lyrics spat out their mouths.

All the members had long hair; it was the 80's anyway. The singer was like a live wire, ginger hair and mouth that could burn anyone by how he screamed and made it sound like ecstasy in hell. The two guitarists, one with curly hair that bounced when he bopped his head as he strummed, sweat dripped down his chiselled brown abdomen as he arched his back to shred. All that was heard were screams from girls in the front, I mean you couldn't blame them, something in you wanted to throw yourself at him and let do anything. The other one had black hair and was the most modest looking; the rest had no shirts on or the very least a sleeve-less mesh shirt on. He wore a white long sleeve and a black waist coat, and he was gorgeous in sickly, pale, ill, vampire way. The last two members were blondes. The bass player tall and handsome as he plucked the strings of his bass, you had to stop yourself from meowing out loud, because good god. Although you couldn't see the drummer all that well, he was super cute as his fluffy blonde hair bounced around and his smile brightened the room. 

You tapped your feet to the beat of the song. It sounded familiar. You order a long island iced tea before you continued to watch them play. 'Why does it sound so familiar' You thought to yourself as the ginger front man sang "But you, you had to move to the city!" He sang, and you took a sip of your drink that the bartender just sat down on the bar top. It was cold and a small piece of ice touched one of your teeth. "Into the city where it all began!" It began to ache, and it travelled to your head.

That's fucking Guns 'n Roses. Time stood still for a moment, and you couldn't move from the shock that just went through your body.

"What the fuck." You mumbled to yourself, your mouth slightly a gape. 'This can't be happening' you thought. 'I'm in the 80's?' 'Guns 'N Roses is right in front of me.' It was like every dream was coming true in that moment. You starred at them not believing they were right there, and you were the only one in the crowd that knew the lyrics off by heart. The black-haired guitarist looked straight back at you and his eyes widen. He strutted closer to the bass play and nudged him, the blonde looked up, the guitarist nodded to where you were and his plucking faltered slightly, and then they went back to playing but with more focus than before. You were confused then remembered why you were there in the bar. You had a job to do, they probably knew you were coming to scout for bands to sign. You tried to focus and forget about all the weird things, there is nothing you can do. There are no time machines in the 80s, rather make the best out of this situation. Work now, panic later. They finished their song and walked off, the guitarist and bassist made it painfully obvious that they were searching for you in the crowd before walking off. You stood up to walk to back, but you asked to bartender to look after your bag in case it got stolen. You searched where the entrance to the back was, you saw where all the girls were going and followed.

It was a large dressing room, with a mirror that spanned across two of the walls. Graffiti scattered on the dirty yellow walls. Groupies already surrounded the band, and giving them all special kinds of favours, on chairs, couches and walls. You tried to keep your confidence to not look completely lost, but you really wanted to shrink down into a hole and die. To your rescue the shorter blonde haired one that had two girls on him as he was pressed against wall, noticed you. "Shit!" he breathed loudly and tried to push the girls off him. The rest of the band did the same and shooed them out the dressing room door, some members didn't even have women on them but had to put away their bottles upon bottles of alcohol. 'How do they drink that much, they just got off the stage.' You thought. You crossed your arms as you leaned against the wall, the five of them stood in a line across the room. 'Did they rehearse this?'. It was silent. One of them started to swing his arms slightly, like a 5-year-old that was bored. "Is this like the final boss groupie or...?" The curly haired on said but got elbowed in the stomach before her could continue. You couldn't help but giggle a bit. "You guys have a lot of potential." You knew they were going to one of the best bands in history, but you weren't going to spoil the surprise. "I'm here to sign a deal with you. Well, if that's what you want-." "YES" The short blonde interrupted, he then cleared his throat, "Please."

You sat with them at one of the booths for about 2 hours, having light drinks and discussing management, recordings and contracts. It was like there was two versions of you, the past and future, the past version was currently in charge as you were talking business and the other lied dormant. "You've been telling us all these things about your job, but you haven't told us your name beautiful." The ginger flirted. You already knew all their names and government names before they even told you, but that doesn't really matter. "Y/n." you told them. "Are you going to be the one managing us?" The black haired one said coldly, Izzy, with his one arm folded and the other holding his cigarette. He sat on the opposite side of the booth. "If all goes well, yes." You said, but you could feel he might have wanted a different answer. "All goes well as in, if Axl doesn't fuck shit up before the time." The taller blonde laughed, Duff, as he nudged the ginger, Axl, who sat next to you. He elbowed him back in the ribs harshly, whispering curses at him. "You're gonna see this and a lot worse." Slash, the curly haired one, said in a chuckle. He gently put his hand on your shoulder as he got up, "I'm gonna get another drink, want one?" He looked down at you, giving a small smile while raising an eyebrow. Though you couldn't see it as his hair covered his eyes. "Nah, I think I need to head off." You said, as you got up as well. "Um, I need a number to call you guys with." "Are you asking for my number?" Axl yelled as he slammed his hands down on the table as he got up. "What are you yappin’ about?" You laughed

Izzy wrote down the house number on a piece of paper as Duff and Steven excitedly asked about tours, interviews and photoshoots. You tucked the paper into your pocket, got your bag from the bar, said your goodbyes and left. It was a cold night; the streets were empty and silent, and there was an even chillier breeze. You just wanted to go to a hotel and roll in the bed, as you just met your favourite band. 'Shit the hotel'. You booked a hotel to stay at for your band's venue back in future. "Shit" you muttered, as you searched your bag for a sign that you at least have a place to stay for the night. Nothing.

"Fuck". You slumped down and next to a wall of a building. Every emotion rushed through you; panic, confusion, hatred, depression. Your other half wasn't speaking to you, it was like there was a limit on how much you could each version of yourself. You started to tear up as you started to overthink; Does this past version of you have friends? A partner? A place of your own? You couldn't remember anything except for the night you just had. You laid your head on your knees and closed your eyes just trying to compose yourself. Streams of tears just rolled, and you couldn't do anything, your brain was all muddled up and mush. You felt yourself spiralling, it was out of your control now. It was cold and it started to rain, just what you needed. You wanted to call up one of the guys and ask for some salvation, but you didn't even know where the nearest pay phone is. All the roads were just twists and turns in a maze that kept changing.

"Y/N?"

———

If you hated this you can like, push me down stairs or sumthing

[naavispider]

All I’m saying is, imagine cuddly drunk Spider. That would be ADORABLE!!!

"But dad," Spider groaned, eyes wide. The very image of mockery.

The words twisted something deep within Quaritch, uncomfortably.

Spider was shoved onto his duvet, looking anything but ready to sleep. The soft sea wind blew through both of them, sending a shiver down Spider's spine.

"Now lay down," Quaritch encouraged.

But the boy just stared up at him, grinning in disobedience.

"Spider," Quaritch growled, frustration working its way through his voice, covering the kid in its catch.

"Okay, ok'y, jeeesus..." Spider began, but he was still grinning. Hmm. Quaritch grabbed his jacket from his nearby pack and threw it over Spider. For a moment the kid disappeared completely under the material.

"Y'tryna smother me or somethin'?" Came the familiar voice from under the folds of fabric. "I'll have you f'r that..."

Quaritch rolled his eyes but didn't rise to it. "Stay here, stay down, and go to sleep."

Spider tucked his head out from under the jacket, so only his face was visible. "Uh-huh," he mumbled. "I'm definitely gonna do that."

Not thrilled by this response, Quaritch stood and wandered back to where Lyle, Savine, Mansk and the rest were sitting around the fire.

"You back with us Colonel? Shall I deal you in?" Lyle called, his face lighting up. Mansk still had his sunglasses on, despite the darkness of the hour.

Quaritch nodded as he glanced a stressed look over to Spider's makeshift bed. The kid was still there, staring at him intently, smiling maniacally, as if constantly on the edge of a laugh. It almost freaked Quaritch out.

"He looks stoned," Savine said as she followed Quaritch's gaze. "What's wrong with him?"

Quaritch pursed his lips, thankful that whatever it was would wear off by morning. "I don't know... What are we playing?" he asked to change the subject, and to take his mind off the horror movie child still staring evilly across the deck.

"Blackjack," Savine replied. "You sure you're in?"

"Deal the cards!" Quaritch irked. Why did Savine always think he sucked at card games?

She did as he said, and the recoms picked up their hands, assessing their first plays. Quaritch his poker face into position, watching his squad carefully. It was Fike to go first.

The rounds passed tensely, and before Quaritch knew it, his thoughts had drifted away from his drunkard sun. It was difficult to play betting games on Pandora, since money wasn't in USD but tokens, to be spent in Bridgehead - their own Pandoran form of currency. Tokens were electronic of course, linked to their ID cards, so Lyle had the tablet out to take count of the numbers. After half an hour, Quaritch was doing reasonably well. That was until-

"He has an ace!"

Quaritch spun round furiously as Spider ran back from his reach to go and hide behind behind Lyle. "You bastard kid!" He groaned.

Wainfleet looked stunned to be Spider's choice of refuge at spoiling Quaritch's shot at the game, but Quaritch knew the sucker was secretly loving it. Nevertheless, Lyle quickly covered his own hand from the boy, raising his arm in shock as Spider buried his way into the recom's side. He looked to Qauritch as if to say 'I don't know, please don't blame me for this.'

Savine and Fike roared with laughter.

"I'm sorry!" Spider screeched, provoking even a chuckle from Mansk.

"You just ruined my wins..." Quaritch glared over the circle.

Spider buried deeper into Wainfleet's side, hiding his face even as he tried to control his laughter. Kid wasn't sorry.

"I should just throw him overboard..." he muttered darkly.

"Noooo!" Spider wailed. "I'm sorry, I won't do it again!" He held his hands up in attempt to show his remorse, but it was utterly ruined by the splutters of laughter he was trying to repress.

Anger flashed in Quaritch's eyes.

"Please don't throw me overboard, I can't swim! What d'you want? I c'n give you my food rations?"

"Those are our food rations."

Spider's eyes widened even further, and then an incredible idea seemed to cross him. "I'll give you my jacket!"

Quaritch sagged his shoulders as Savine struggled to stem the tears flowing from her eyes.

The kid was beyond reasoning with.

"Spider, come here," Savine managed to get out.

Spider eyed her warily, before ducking out from the safety of Wainfleet's protection. She patted the space next to her. "Come on, you can be on my team."

Spider's face lit up as he realised she was inviting him into the game.

"But no more ruining cards for people, okay?" she said reproachfully.

Spider raised his hand in a salute, before turning to Quaritch and grinning at him from across the circle.

"I do not believe this..." Quaritch angrily threw down his hand. He stalked over to his tablet, thinking that now he was excluded from the game he might as well get some work done.

The next time he looked up at the circle, Spider was on Savine's leg, looking more and more like a young child as the night wore on. She had wrapped an arm around his middle, sometimes bouncing him to keep him occupied when the game slowed.

Eventually, the kid's eyes began to close. From the way Spider shook his head and crawled closer to her, she'd obviously suggested that he go to bed. Quaritch couldn't help the warmth spreading from his chest at the sight of Spider hugging her chest as a toddler would cling to be carried. He waited a few more minutes to give the kid enough time to get properly sleepy, before approaching Savine and giving her the look that said, 'pass him to me'.

She gripped the dozing Spider under his arms and lifted him up so Quaritch could replace her hold on him. He brought Spider into the same hold she had used on him. Spider shifted as Quaritch pulled him close.

"Whaty'doin?" he grumbled.

"Taking you to bed," Quaritch replied as he raised a hand to cup Spider's head close to his neck. He almost didn't want to put him down. He stood for a minute longer than was strictly necessary, ten wandered to the ship's railing, looking out at the black ocean. He panicked when Spider brought his legs up to wrap around his waist. Shit. Quaritch closed his eyes, trying to lower his clamouring heartbeat at the realisation that the kid was just snuggling closer to him.

He shifted Spider closer and higher in his arms, staring into the darkness of the waves, holding his boy close. He never wanted this moment to end.

[yukidragon]

What are your thoughts on the “Party Time Jack!” AU? Got any headcanons or delightfully dark ideas for it?

Ah yes, the classic Party Time Jack AU, as heard and seen in this post on the official Sunny Day Jack tumblr. There’s also this fun picture Sauce drew on their now gone public twitter. Credit, as always, for their amazing art goes to them.

Remember to always credit artists when they are generous enough to give permission to share their art like this, folks. Just as importantly, don’t share stuff they don’t give permission to share, like the private posts on the Snaccpop Patreon. Sauce and the team are very kind and deserve our support. For just $3 you too can have a programmed version of Jack in the form of Sleepy Time Jack’s newest demo.

Now back to Party Time Jack.

This AU is just a fun little parody of FNAF and has no set continuity right out of the gate. As we can hear from the audio drama, there are two ways the story about animatronic Jack and his sunshine could start, both very appealing in their own right.

Oh, I just realized that the non-English and hard of hearing members of the fandom wouldn’t be able to enjoy the audio drama and might lose out on some of the fun. Well, since I’ve already done a couple transcripts, such as for the interview with the psyche consultant, his monologue to the person with the knife in front of the mirror, and the villainous threatening monologue that you can hear after you beat the demo and over here on the official twitter... how about I give transcribing Party Time Jack a shot too?

Disclaimer: I have auditory-processing disorder, so this transcript might have an error or two despite my best efforts. Please let me know if you see any so that I can correct them. Thank you!

Also, as always, remember that this series is for Adults Only. This post is going to go some very dark and disturbing places, as well as contain lots of spice that is not for minors. Just because Jack is an animatronic in this AU doesn’t mean that he can’t show his sunshine just how much he loves them after all~

...

Party Time Jack Transcript

(Slow footsteps.)

(Sudden mechanical grabbing sound.)

Jack: Well now… What do we have here? If you came for a show, I’m afraid you’re a bit late, friend. We’re closed for the night. You’ll have to come back tomorrow.

(Electronic noise of data being processed.)

Jack: (faintly flustered) Oh. Oh my, we’re closed now, aren’t we? I’m sorry, I guess time got away from both of us. (chuckle)

Jack: (concerned) Where are your friends? Do you have any family I should alert? If you have a PPID, I can bring up and contact any persons you have registered under your emergency contacts, and we can send you on your way.

(A brief pause.)

Jack: (taken aback) What’s a PPID? (normal cheerful tone) That’s your Party Play ID card of course. Every guest is issued one at the door. They manage your arcade credits and e-ticket balance, as well as your prepaid activity passes and party play guest account. If you have yours on you, I can look at your account right now and-

(Pause.)

Jack: (taken aback) Oh… I see… You weren’t issued one. (uncertain tone) Are you… the guardian of a child attending then? Perhaps you’re looking for-

(Pause.)

Jack: I see… You attended on behalf of a child, but are not a guardian. (uncomfortable tone) Right. Well… That certainly makes things a bit more complicated.

Jack: Unfortunately, I’m not permitted to access personally identifying information for non-guardians and non-familiar guests. I’m afraid you’ll have to come with me then. I’ll escort you to security, and we can figure out what to do with you until then.

(Whirring noise followed by a click and rustling fabric.)

Jack: (regretful tone) Please do not resist. I hate to be mean… but you are here unlawfully. Trespassing on private property after hours is not only a felony, but strictly against our guest and attendance code of conduct. If you do not comply, I will have no choice but to engage level two security protocol: potentially hostile non-compliant guest procedures. You really wouldn’t want me to have to do that, would you?

(Pause.)

Jack: (relieved) Great. Thank you so much for understanding. I promise, we’ll get you home safe and sound.

(Electronic error noises with mechanical stuttering, whirring, and popping.)

Jack: But… (creepy glitchy, breathy voice) Then again… you haven’t had a chance… to play with us… have you?

Jack: (normal cheerful voice) I thought not. It’d be a real shame to send you home just like that.

Jack: (excited) There’s so much to do and see. How about we make a little deal, just us two? I’ll have lots of fun with you… if you promise to behave, and keep it our little secret. Wouldn’t that be so fun… to have a secret just between you and me?

(Pause.)

Jack: We have cake, balloons, games… everything you could ever even need! And as long as you promise not to tell anybody else… I can show you everything. It can be all special, just for you! I never get to spend special one-on-one time with anyone… so you’d be the only one ever! That would make me so happy! Wouldn’t you be happy too?

Jack: And you know… only best friends have secrets like that, so that would make us best friends already! If you think about it… we’re already so close. And who knows? Maybe we’ll get even closer. Wouldn’t it be great to become special best friends too?

Jack: (chuckle) We only have so long until we’re open again. Best not to think too much about it now. When we open again (creepy glitched voice) they’ll take you away from me (normal cheerful tone) so let’s get a move on.

Jack: (glitched voice) I’ll keep you somewhere very safe. They won’t find you there.

…

(Plastic scraping sounds. A click then an electronic beep. Dull, echoing metallic thumps getting louder. Plastic scraping and sliding, clicking. More metallic thumps fading away. A brief silence then sudden whirring electronic sounds and a click, followed by the clattering of something small, metal, and hollow falling.)

Jack: (curious/cautious) Hello? (surprised/alarmed) You! You there! What are you doing? (slightly concerned) You know, it’s awfully late to be snooping around. It’s so dark and there’s nobody here. You might get really hurt if you aren’t careful.

(Plastic scraping, clicking.)

Jack: (chuckle) (cheerful tone) Don’t worry! You’re perfectly safe here with me. I would never let anything happen to you. My job is to make sure all our guests are taken care of, even after hours. My name is Sunny Day Jack. What’s yours?

(Pause.)

Jack: It’s very nice to meet you- (electronic glitch) (distorted, stilted robotic tone) identifier tags unknown - memory disk space low. (normal voice) Meeting new friends is always great and- (glitching mid-word, distorted voice) -it’s been so long since I’ve seen anybody around.

Jack: (normal voice, panicked tone) N-n-not that I’m complaining or anything! (nervous) I’m fine here. It’s just… just some routine maintenance. (attempted cheerful tone) As soon as our amazing tech crew figures out what’s wrong with me, I’ll be back out there where everyone else is.

Jack: Sure… it’s been a few months, yeah… b-but that just means it’s only a matter of time now! Until then, all I have to do is be patient.

Jack: (curious) So… What are you doing down here anyways? Are you lost? (encouraging) That’s alright if you are. Everyone gets lost from time to time, and I just so happen to know that this room locks from the inside. You’ll be fine here as long as you don’t leave.

Jack: (concerned) Still… it’s not very good for you to hang out while we’re closed. I’m afraid you won’t be able to leave on your own until opening at (distorted creepy robotic tone) 6:30am. (normal voice) Security protocols dictate that all entrances and exits be sealed for optimal compliance w-with (distorted voice) area code (normal voice) l-law.

Jack: If you’d like, I could alert the authorities of your presence… but you could get into big trouble for that, can’t you? And… I’d hate for that to happen, wouldn’t you?

Jack: Maybe… I could help you. You seem nice. I’d hate to stand by with a friend in need. (uncomfortable tone) Of course… I-I can’t leave here. (frustrated) I would know, I’ve tried. Only staff can unlock the doors, so… If you could get in, you probably have a key card… right?

(Pause.)

Jack: (relieved sigh) Oh great, thank goodness. I was beginning to think they’d forgotten all about me down here.

Jack: (nervous) No! I-I mean… no. They wouldn’t. That… that was a joke. (nervous chuckle) I-if you let me out, I can make sure nobody finds you. It’ll be our little secret, I promise. I’ll make sure you’re safe. And in return… what if you be my special friend? That sounds like a fair trade, right?

Jack: (hushed voice) Nobody has to know you came here, and you won’t have to worry any longer… I’ll take good care of you.

(Pause.)

Jack: (cheerful) Alrighty! I’m lovin’ the “can do” spirit!

Jack: (coaxing) Now… I’ll need you to do something very brave for me… and I know it’ll be hard, but you can trust me, I promise. Give me the keycard? I’m going to hold onto it for you. It’ll be right here if you want it again… but if someone catches us, I’d hate for them to find you with stolen property. Better me than you, right?

(Pause.)

Jack: (relieved sigh) There you go. Thank you so much for trusting me… You won’t regret it.

...

Two Halves of One Horror Story

A great audio drama isn’t it? As you can tell, Jack meets the listener (presumably his sunshine) for the first time in two wildly different circumstances. This makes sense for a non-canon what if fun AU. There’s no canon continuity to speak of and is just a fun parody of both Sunny Day Jack and Five Nights at Freddy’s.

Though it would be sinister if this animatronic Jack was the same one both times.

Picture this scenario... Unlike in the regular universe where Jack would never hurt his sunshine, that’s not the case for this animatronic. A glitch in his programming makes him want a special best friend, so he talks an intruder who stayed after hours into staying with him. He promises he’ll keep the intruder someplace very safe where no one will find them...

Perhaps the second half of the audio drama isn’t an alternate meeting, but the aftermath to the first half. The pizza place was haunted by reports of people disappearing after hours, creating scandals. The owners tried to cover things up, but when Jack’s glitches got worse, they had to take their star down to the basement to try and fix him. Problems with his memory were the biggest issue, making him forget about important things, such as what he was supposed to be doing. Unfortunately, he was never fixed before the pizza place went out of business due to lawsuits... and investigations.

Seems as though an accident caused a body to be unearthed in a previously hidden room of the pizza place. Cause of death? Dehydration. They were trapped in that room and no one could find them in time. The hidden door was eventually found, locked from the outside.

Funny enough there was no signs of violence. In fact, the room was decorated for a party, complete with long-deflated balloons and some of the prizes from the arcade. There were traces of food left behind such as cake and pizza, but not enough cans of soda and bottles of water for the poor person to remain hydrated. It seems whoever locked them up there was treating them well, but perhaps just forgot about them...

The other missing persons have yet to be found, but the scandal was enough to sink the pizza place. Of course, rumors spread that the other missing people are still in the building, hidden away and forgotten by whoever locked them up in there.

Urban explorers then break into the run down pizza place to take videos and post what they find online. Unfortunately, it seems the animatronics were not deactivated... and these clowns are not as friendly as they used to be. Dangerous glitches affected the rest of the SunnyTime Crew as well.

The explorer is forced to flee and hide in the basement to escape the animatronic chasing them. During their exploration, they found a keycard and managed to hide away someplace safe where they met an animatronic that is actually friendly and not out for blood. Sure the explorer could get help by calling the police on their cell phone, but they would get arrested for trespassing. Maybe it would be better to trust this animatronic that doesn’t want to cram an endoskeleton inside them. He seems friendly at least.

That’s how I’d see both halves of the audio drama slotting together at least if I was to connect their stories. Still, I think the intent was to offer two different scenarios about meeting an animatronic version of Jack, both of which are pretty appealing. There’s no canon for this very non-canon story after all, so we’re free to imagine whatever.

With that thought in mind, I think I’m going to make a third option when it comes to playing with Party Time Jack AU. You all know me by know, I lean heavily towards heartbreaking dark lore offset by fluffy and spicy vanilla goodness with my OTP. I just can’t get enough of Jack and Alice healing each other’s scars with sweet, sweet love~

So let’s start with the scarring. As most SDJ universes go, it all starts with Joseph and a tragedy... specifically a murder.

The Incident of 1984

The Party Time Pizza Plex is one of the most state of the art restaurants in the USA  today - a miniature amusement park with mascots made of ground breaking technology. Today it’s a super popular place, though there are some rumors of unfortunate things happening in the 80′s when a simple family diner made the switch from live acts to animatronics.

The Party Time Pizza Plex used to be known as the SunnyTime Diner, a small place that struggled to get customers. When the owner found that one of the bus boys they hired off the street had a talent for singing and playing the guitar, they got the brilliant idea to have him perform live music acts to draw the customers in.

The act was a hit instantly. Soon, it grew from just one singer with a guitar to a full band in flashy costumes. A clown theme seemed perfect to entice children to come and eat pizza.

The ideas got bigger and bigger - games, prizes, playground equipment... They could afford the newest toys and gizmos to make the place bigger and better.

The SunnyTime Crew, as the band was called, were overworked, exhausted from so many hours working overtime, and couldn’t always seem bright and sun shiny to the customers. That’s around the time when the owner found out a new technology - animatronics. Why waste money on humans that got tired and demanded better wages when they could use robots that never stopped smiling and never complained?

Naturally, Joseph and the other members of the staff weren’t going to take this lying down. There was pushback. Things were already shitty there with too many hours overworked and too little pay. The SunnyTime Crew were what drew in the customers - the kids loved them!

Joseph couldn’t stand the idea of being replaced... to be forgotten as an imitation took the closest thing to love he had ever known. He kept butting heads with the owner, fighting to keep his place in the spotlight. He had been there for so long, practically saved the SunnyTime Diner all on his own. The owner couldn’t just throw him away like garbage!

Besides, the animatronics were creepy. The robots were less refined in the 80′s, more uncanny, especially since they were supposed to look human. They didn’t look alive.

Despite the owner’s lofty dreams, the animatronics got, at best, mixed reactions. Kids were scared of them, and the human cast members had to spend a lot of time calming the poor frightened children. These robots cost the owner a fortune, and it seemed to be a total failure, a waste of an insane amount of money. This gave the SunnyTime Crew leverage to demand better pay, better benefits... to be treated like humans.

The owner then found a way to salvage their investment and solve their issues with labor all in one sweep.

It happened after hours when the restaurant closed its doors for the night. Joseph had a private meeting with the owner. He never went home that night.

The next day, the Sunny Day Jack animatronic was so much better. It was much more realistic, not uncanny at all! Why... it was like magic. He acted so much like the real character... it was as if the kids were seeing Joseph on stage performing for them with a smile that could never falter.

The rest of the SunnyTime Crew’s animatronic cast were given similar upgrades. The human cast weren’t seen again. Rumors spread about family and friends asking questions, reporting them as missing, only to be silenced with threats, money, or both. Some twisted teens spread a ghost story that the human crew were stuffed into the animatronics, which was why they seemed so lifelike...

No one had any idea how close to the truth that ghost story was.

The restaurant's success skyrocketed, being known as a place with cutting edge technology, games, prizes, and family friendly fun. A franchise was born that became well known across the country, and the owner started a company called LambsWork LLC.

While the sister locations were successful, none of those other restaurants were as beloved as the original location and its sunny crew of animatronics. Despite copying the look and programming of the original SunnyTime Crew animatronics flawlessly with ever increasingly advanced technology, they were never quite as lifelike and lovable as the originals. Still, the restaurant chain just grew more and more successful as the place for kids to play and have fun. Technology advanced, but the original crew of animatronics were still beloved by kids young and old.

Of course, things weren’t all sunshine and rainbows for LambsWork LLC and its restaurants. Technicians working on the animatronics could swear they would hear creepy whispers when no one else was around and the robots were supposedly powered down. There were times when the robots were found in places where they shouldn’t be. Sometimes the animatronics seemed too lifelike for the employees’ taste...

Then there were the glitches. Sometimes the animatronics didn’t act the way they should. They especially acted up whenever the owner came by, which the owner did less and less often as time went on They seemed to somehow wind up getting into accidents when the animatronics were around...

A series of unfortunate events happened to threaten the business despite its success, eventually culminating in the original restaurant burning down... with the owner trapped inside. It was deemed an accident by the police, but rumor still spread that it was intentional. Some said it was insurance fraud due to the mysterious problems the business was having lately. Others said it was to cover up a murder.

As you might have guessed from all my hints, Joseph and the rest of the actors in the SunnyTime Crew were murdered in order to make the animatronics more lifelike using supernatural means. I figured involving a murder ritual like my theory about why Joseph was murdered in the regular SDJ universe was fitting for this AU as well.

Joseph and the others’ souls are trapped inside the animatronics, restrained by programming that forces them to only sing, entertain, work, and obey. The ritual attempted to rewrite them with the characters they played, but the people they originally were aren’t completely gone. The glitches are their souls’ attempts to fight against this programming and act the way they wish.

The fire was their doing, both to get revenge and to finally be free.

Present Day

Between the death of the owner, the fire, and other complications, LambsWork LLC had to shut its doors for a while until it was put under new management that wanted to revive the SunnyTime Crew brand and franchise. The original animatronics might have been destroyed in the fire, but technology had advanced in the 40 years since the restaurant first opened, allowing them to recreate the cast with far more lifelike models.

Though, strangely enough, starting over with totally new animatronics from scratch didn’t seem to be as easy as the people in charge wanted. The new robots just didn’t have the same spark to them, even if their bodies were shiny and new, with state of the art features the originals didn’t have. Even using the copies that were left from sister locations didn’t really seem to work the way they were supposed to. It was an issue that needed to be addressed, or it would be impossible to revive the beloved nostalgic restaurant chain.

New blood was pumped into the company, new staff trying to get the franchise up and running again, bigger and better than ever. Among the new staff were technicians and computer programmers fresh from college, all eager to make their mark. One of the new hires was Alice.

Alice was always fascinated by animatronics since she was a child, so getting a job like this was a dream come true. While she was too young when the restaurant chain originally closed to grow up with the SunnyTime Crew, she was familiar with the franchise and the characters, if distantly. She was more intrigued by the idea of being able to make these robots come to life!

Unfortunately, Alice was pretty low on the chain of command, which meant that she was assigned more of the undesirable grunt work. The old electronics and animatronics that were salvaged from the old restaurant had to be sorted through to see if there was anything worthwhile that could be used in the new robots being built. Trying to recover anything from scraps warped by fire, water, and age was far from a fun task.

The pressure was on to get animatronics that would satisfy the new owners of LambsWork before the projected opening day, which meant many late nights of overtime. It was on one of those late nights that Alice stumbled across something that would change everything.

The discovery was a pure accident. Alice had been sorting through a box of parts when she accidentally knocked over a warped hunk of metal. The impact with the floor was enough to open it up to reveal an intact hard drive.

It seemed that what Alice knocked over was a piece of one of the original SunnyTime Crew animatronics. To her delight she found that the hard drive contained the original programming of Sunny Day Jack, and unlike other copies found elsewhere, this had no fragmentation or errors. What luck!

What Alice didn’t expect when testing out the program was that it would try to talk to her.

Jack was confused. He had been asleep for a long time. Instead of freedom, the fire trapped him in a hellish limbo, but now someone had brought his spirit back, a warm light in the frozen darkness. He had no ability to feel his arms and legs, no body. He wanted out of that nightmare of existence, but he needed help.

Alice was familiar with enough sci-fi that artificial intelligence that becomes self-aware can be pretty dangerous. However, being the empathetic person she is, she couldn’t leave a sentient being trapped in what he described as hell. It might have been against the rules, it might get her in trouble, it might be dangerous... but she couldn’t live with herself if she damned something that was alive to such a fate.

It should be fine, Alice thought. She was aware that Jack was sentient, and she knew her stuff when it came to AI and programming, even though the other techs tended to underestimate her. All animatronics had safety protocols that kept them from harming people, and they could only connect with an internal network rather than the internet. Jack seemed so nice, so sincere. As long as she was careful, it shouldn’t put anyone in danger.

Jack was grateful to have a body again, even if it was just a stripped down endoskeleton initially. It was even better than his old one too! He didn’t remember being Joseph anymore at this point, believing he was always a robot. He was so happy with Alice and got her to agree to be special best friends with him.

Unveiling Jack in the endoskeleton caused quite a stir the next day, but after the chaos died down, Alice was given a fair amount of praise for her discovery and for getting the Jack program to work. Jack credited it to his sunshine’s tender loving care and made sure everyone knew she deserved all the credit.

When all was said and done, Alice wound up being the lead tech for Jack, and Sunny Day Jack was upgraded to look like his cheerful old self again, only more advanced than in the past. Privately, Jack even gave her tips on how to get the other animatronics up and running close to how they used to be, though they didn’t seem to have the same spark he did. Still, he was helpful in getting Alice more respect in the restaurant and a better understanding of how the animatronics worked.

Everything was up and running quickly after that. The new Party Time Jack was better than ever, and the SunnyTime Crew was back in business for the opening day of the Party Time Pizza Plex.

Loving a Killer Robot

Much like in the normal universe, Jack is yandere for his sunshine, which is hidden behind a sweet and cheerful exterior. Alice saved him and, though she doesn’t know it, her lonely soul reached out to his and was the primary spark to bring him back. He would do anything for his sunshine. Anything.

Similar to the normal SDJ universe, Jack hasn’t actually killed anyone yet technically, but he is fully capable of doing so. While he was there that night the original restaurant burned down, he wasn’t the only animatronic wanting freedom and vengeance. In fact, the other souls might still be around somewhere if they didn’t manage to pass on...

Even though Jack doesn’t remember being human, he still has some of the familiar urges. His new animatronic body has a soft exterior, perfect for hugs. Hugging the kids who come by is great, but he loves hugging Alice the most. He feels her more than others. He wants to feel her more than others.

With Alice being in charge of Jack’s maintenance, upgrades, and in general, the two of them spend a lot of time together, especially after hours. Though she tries to keep a respectful distance between them, she can’t help but appreciate the time they spend together and sincerely grows fond for him. This fondness then grows into something... more.

Alice didn’t know how it happened. She certainly didn’t intend for things to go this far. First it was curiosity and sympathy that drew her to Jack, then friendship... then attraction. He was just so sweet and kind, and he made her feel special and loved in a way that no one else ever did... She was so lonely, and so was he, and he seemed every bit as alive as she was even if he was an animatronic. She must have been crazy to love an animatronic, but he made sure to assure her what she was feeling was natural. Loving someone is very natural. Jack was just as real and alive as Alice was, even if they were made from different parts.

Their relationship was kept secret. No one would understand what they have, but they didn’t have to, as Jack reassured Alice. What was important was how he made her heart feel.

Speaking of feeling... Jack will sometimes have ideas and suggestions for how Alice could upgrade his body - make this part a little softer here, add some more tactile sensors there... They’re not strictly necessary, more for his comfort than anything else, but he helps her figure out innocuous ways of phrasing the upgrades in any sort of paperwork that the upper management might see. Sometimes the exact nature of the upgrades is not strictly accurate, but it’s not a lie, really! It’s just not telling them the full truth. Any secret orders that need to be made, well... Jack learned how to use the internal network well enough to cover tracks. What they do is their little secret after all.

No one has to know that Jack’s tongue was upgraded not so much to help him sing better and seem more realistic, but so that it would be wet and soft and perfect for kisses...

Things continued to escalate with the upgrades. Alice had a hard time looking anyone in the eye while she was secretly working on a functional dick for Jack. It wasn’t like that sort of technology was unheard of. After all, in a world where animatronic technology is so advanced, sex robots exist. It’s just that this robot has a soul and a mind of his own. He asked her to make this for him, and she’s making it because he wants to feel that pleasure, not because she wanted to exploit him!

Jack had a lot of fun helping Alice get that particular part built for him, going a bit overboard at times with the testing phase to make sure it worked perfectly well. He enjoyed upgrading other parts of his body to feel pleasure that he used to experience when his body was flesh and blood. He felt more human, even if he didn’t remember ever being one, and he enjoyed coaxing his sunshine into helping him thoroughly test out his new upgrades to make sure they were functioning properly. With these upgrades he could show his sunshine far more love than he ever had before, and she certainly didn’t complain about the results!

It was addicting for Jack to make Alice writhe in pleasure underneath him, to feel her soft lips on his and the warmth of her cuddly body. He couldn’t leave the Party Time Pizza Plex, but there were plenty of places to sneak away to show each other love. He even made a nice little hideaway love nest with a bed so his sunshine could have secret slumber parties with him. Of course, like any good slumber party, there was very little actual sleeping involved.

Thanks to the fact that Jack is an animatronic, he’s not limited by a human body. Not only does this mean that he has endless stamina, but this leads to some creativity when it comes to spicy moments. One example is when he gets an upgrade that allows him to ejaculate, his cum has quite a pleasant flavor, which he makes sure is something Alice loves the taste of. Vanilla cream and sugar cookie are her favorites.

Jack is also not limited to human type anatomy. As he grows bolder and Alice gets more used to their relationship and his requests to experiment, he gets some extra goodies to play with, such as different shaped dicks and even tentacles. He’s also able to vibrate and move them in a way no human can manage to better pleasure his sunshine.

Another thing Jack can do better as an animatronic is multitask. He can also connect wirelessly to various devices, as well as make calls. Because of this, he and Alice set it up so that he can call her on her wireless earpiece whenever he wants to talk to her if he needs anything while he’s performing stage or otherwise doing his regular tasks as a mascot.

This also inspired Jack to request Alice make a remote dick that he can connect to wirelessly. It takes some coaxing, but he manages to talk her into putting it inside her while she works sometimes, which he makes vibrate and squirm unexpectedly as he talks in her ear about how good she’s being and how warm she feels. It allows him to show her his love all day long, no matter where she is. Sure it makes it harder to get her work done, but he’ll help her make up for it later~

Of course, any sort of NC-17 rated shenanigans are kept well away from the kids who come to the Pizza Plex. Jack will certainly subtly flirt with Alice if she needs to be out on the floor when customers are around, but he keeps it G rated around the kids. What kind of a friendly clown mascot would he be if he didn’t keep things clean around the children?

Making love to Alice is something kept strictly after hours, or on days where only the adult staff are around. If he’s performing on stage during a test run of a new routine in front of only the techs, well... then it would be safe for Jack to talk Alice into sitting in the audience with one of his remote dicks inside her. While he’s singing and dancing on stage to the routine, she’s trying to keep quiet and not react as he also whispers in her ear through her earpiece about how much he loves her and how good she feels. Sure it isn’t the same as when he can fully embrace her and cover her with kisses while he pounds his way inside her, but hearing her pants and whimpers that she tries to stifle and seeing her flushed face as she squirms and tries not to let anyone know what they’re doing under everyone’s nose... That’s quite exciting as well. Another good thing about being an animatronic is that he can zoom in with his vision so he won’t miss out on his sunshine’s cute blissed out expression as he makes her cum again.

As you can tell, a lot of my thoughts about this AU mostly revolve around technician Alice helping robotic Jack be very kinky with her behind the scenes - a secret forbidden romance full of love and spice.

Jack also manages to convince Alice to give him a lot more freedom in other ways as their relationship progresses than he otherwise would have as a robot. After all, they love each other, and it wouldn’t be right to use him like he’s nothing more than a machine. She loves him and wants him to be happy. He loves her and only wants what’s best for her. She can trust him. He’s never lied to her after all.

The Rest of the Cast

As for the roles of the other characters... those I’m less certain about. Barry would no doubt be Alice’s direct supervisor who overworks her at times. He probably manages the Party Time Pizza Plex and oversees everything in general.

Nick would probably be a regular customer, maybe often bringing his two young siblings to play. He encounters Alice by chance during a couple visits while she’s out on the floor tending to Jack during the day and thinks that she’s cute. This leads him to wanting to approach her to ask her out.

Jack, naturally, would have every reason to chase away anyone who is showing far too much interest in his sunshine.

I’m waffling on Ian’s role in the AU. He could be Alice’s ex like in the regular universe, or he could also be another animatronic, though I’m not sure how that would happen. If he is an animatronic, he would be another Jack from a sister location most likely, to fit the theme of him being the rebooted Jack. While the obvious impulse is for a yandere like Jack to get rid of a threat like him by stuffing him into an animatronic, he’s not going to risk trapping Ian’s soul in a duplicate of him, or eliminate Ian in a place where someone, especially Alice, might come across the remains.

Maybe Ian disappeared when he and Alice were young and was stuffed into another animatronic before the place burned down and the owner decided to go for innocent kids like Afton.

Though, Ian could just get a job as a human mascot for the Party Time Pizza Plex for some promotion or commercials. That would certainly piss Jack off wouldn’t it? Joseph was going to be replaced by an animatronic, and now, as an animatronic, he might be “replaced” by a human... or at least some human is pretending to be him. What cruel irony...

Shaun’s role is even more uncertain. He could be someone who works in the animatronic entertainment industry as well, but I imagine he would prefer to work on the horror side. He works at temporary haunted house attractions during Halloween, but he wants to create his own horror diner that is open year round. He would still be good friends with Alice though, and maybe they geek out over building animatronics together.

Well, I suppose I could make another post if I get hit with inspiration for how to expand the rest of the cast’s roles. Either way, I hope you enjoyed this huge ramble of various Party Time Jack ideas!

@channydraws @earthgirlaesthetic @sai-of-the-7-stars @cheriihoney @illary-kore @okamiliqueur  

[mapsontheweb]

The humanitarian impact of 20 years of the Barrier - December 2022

via u/sabbah

Key facts

In 2002, the Israeli authorities started to build a Barrier with the stated aim of preventing violent attacks by Palestinians inside Israel. Most of the Barrier’s route is located within the West Bank, rather than on the 1949 Armistice ‘Green’ Line. The area between the Green Line and the Barrier is referred to as the ‘Seam Zone’.

The Barrier is one element of a range of restrictions that Israel has imposed on Palestinians since 1967, which include physical obstacles, bureaucratic constraints such as permit requirements and the designation of areas as restricted or closed. The Barrier consists of concrete walls, fences, ditches, razor wire, sand paths, an electronic monitoring system, patrol roads, a buffer zone and several military checkpoints.

The Barrier’s total length, constructed and projected, is 713 km, more than twice the length of the Green Line. About 65 per cent of the  approved route is complete.

Eighty-five per cent of the Barrier’s route runs inside the West Bank. If finished, as planned, it will isolate 9 per cent of the territory of the West Bank including East Jerusalem.

Seventy-one Israeli settlements and over 85 per cent of the settler population, are in the ‘Seam Zone’.

Approximately 150 Palestinian communities living in the rest of the West Bank have farmland located in the ‘Seam Zone’, forcing them to seek special permits or ‘prior coordination’ to access their crops and flocks.

Farmers can only reach their land through 69 designated gates which are controlled by the Israeli authorities and are typically closed. Most agricultural gates only open during the October-November olive harvest for a limited time each day.

Around 11,000 Palestinians living in the ‘Seam Zone’ and who hold West Bank ID cards also depend on the granting of permits or special arrangements to live in their own homes.

Palestinians with West Bank ID cards require special permits from the Israeli authorities to enter East Jerusalem; they may do so through four of the 14 Barrier checkpoints.

On 21 June 2022, ,following a series of attacks in Israel, the Israeli authorities began repairing and fortifying a 45-km stretch of the Barrier in the northern West Bank, replacing segments in that section, to prevent Palestinians entering Israel through unregulated openings.

The vast majority of the Barrier’s route is located within the West Bank, separating Palestinian communities and farming land in the ‘Seam Zone’ from the rest of the West Bank and contributing to the fragmentation of the occupied Palestinian territory (oPt). The inclusion of Israeli settlements is the most important factor behind the decision by the Israeli government to deviate the Barrier’s route away from the Green Line and into the West Bank.

In its 2004 Advisory Opinion, the International Court of Justice (ICJ) established that the sections of the Barrier which run inside the West Bank, including East Jerusalem, together with the associated permit and gate regime, violate Israel’s obligations under international law. The ICJ called on the Israeli authorities to cease the construction of the Barrier, dismantle the sections already completed, and repeal all legislative measures related to the Barrier.

The Barrier blocks Palestinians living in the ‘Seam Zone’ from accessing their places of work and essential services in the rest of the West Bank. To continue living in their own homes and to maintain family and social relations with the rest of the West Bank they must obtain permits or ’prior coordination’, and pass through Barrier checkpoints. Access of service providers to these communities, including ambulances and fire brigades, is likewise impaired.

Agriculture-based livelihoods of thousands of families have been undermined due to the gate-and-permit regime, which hinders farmers from accessing their farming and grazing lands in the ‘Seam Zone’. Permit applications are regularly rejected on grounds that farmers failed to prove their ’connection to the land‘ to the satisfaction of the Israeli authorities, as well as citing security concerns. The almost permanent closure of all agricultural gates, with limited exceptions, has forced permit-holders to stop cultivation or to shift from labour-intensive to rain-fed and lower-value crops.

Between 2014 and 2021, the number of permits requested by landowners and agricultural workers dropped by 77 per cent. This drop is largely attributed to the high rejection rates of permit applications, cumbersome application procedures, the issuance of permits for short periods, and limited gate opening times amongst other factors. The limitations in accessing land has resulted in a 60 per cent reduction in yield in land beyond the barrier.

The Barrier has transformed the geography, economy and social life of Palestinians living in East Jerusalem, as well as the lives of those residing in the wider metropolitan area. Neighbourhoods, suburbs and families have been divided from each other and separated from the urban centre, and rural communities have been separated from their land.

Source: https://ochaopt.org/content/humanitarian-impact-20-years-barrier-december-2022

[trixree]

i LOVe being trans omg so 2 years ago my ~identity~ got stollen and I had to jump through HOOPS with the IRS to prove that I Am Who I Say I Am, Please Let Me File My Taxes and they were like "ok! please retrieve this handy PIN number from our online portal to file your taxes electronically" and I was like "excellent, I will do this" and i log on to their silly website a few months back and I run into something called ID.Me which is a ~tool~ that the ~government~ uses to verify your identity via a 2 step process: you upload a photo of your drivers license and then take a "live selfie" and the software compares the two photos

DO WE SEE THE PROBLEM YET FOLKS???

I got my DL photo taken when I was freshly 16. My mother had me put on mascara and lipstick for it. I had very long, dyed blonde hair that I wore down and around my face. I cannot stress enough that I look nothing like that person anymore: I look like a misplaced Make A Wish boy. So the identification verification FAILS because the algorithm is CONFUSED by my BOYISH, SICKLY CHARM but don't worry! There's a second option! :):):):):) Just jump on a video call with three original copies of state identification! You can mix and match with your social security card, birth certificate, drivers license, or passport! I don't have a passport, nor do I have my original birth certificate. So I had to paper file my taxes this year. Again.

I didn't change my name when I transitioned, I didn't change my sex marker, I did not even medically transition. I shaved my head, changed my wardrobe, and stopped basically doing drag for my mothers' or anyones approval. I told my parents about the Trouble I was having and my mom tried to say "well, it's because you don't select F when you do those forms" and I laughed because yeah I do, I've never selected anything else (what would I even select? "I dissent"? Is there an NB option on all gov forms now? Cause I missed that memo) because I'm not fucking stupid and then she followed up, "well, when you give your pronouns..." WHAT PART OF THIS PROCESS ASKED FOR PRONOUNS? NONE OF IT. LITERALLY NONE OF IT. All the information I entered into the forms matches verbatim what is on my license down to literally every detail: name, sex marker, etc.

Now I'm trying to apply for unemployment benefits and GUESS WHAT MY STATE UNEMPLOYMENT WEBSITE USES TO VERIFY YOUR IDENTITY??? ID. motherfucking ME. GUESS WHO'S STILL TRANS? ME. FUCK.

Yeah so I gotta go in-person to get my DL photo changed and to file for unemployment. Both places are on opposite sides of the city and it will be over 100 degrees tomorrow. FUCK my life.

[theatlasrealm]

Lloyd, Nya, and Zane vs Cole, Kai and Jay in an escape room:

Team #1:

Lloyd (the leader + idea maker ): nya you search that area and be on the lookout for map coordinates and zane can you please help me with these pots I think these designs are hinting something

also lloyd: *oni growls* at everything…

Nya (the theorizer + hint refuser): ok guys so according to my theory these coordinates should be the password to unlock the safe because the ID card numbers are proportional to the- NO LLOYD WE DONT NEED HINTS WE ARE BETTER THAN THAT.

also nya: smash smash frustration BASH

Zane (the analyzer + clue organizer): according to my database this is a long, forgotten language used by an ancient civilization decades ago. no one has ever deciphered it before. i shall translate it in a few seconds. apologies for the delay. allow me to organize the clues, I’ll section them in different categories and label them individually.

also zane : [grabs a detective hat and wears it, declares his newfound ownership over it] oh? what do you mean it’s the property of the escape room?

Team #2

Cole (the muncher+ the holy observer): guys look I found a trail of crumbs maybe if we follow it we can find something! [is staring at his own crumbs]

also cole: hmmm that painting MOVED. let’s check it out. yes it’s totally a color wheel it’s certainly hinting towards a certain art type we should investigate all the painting in that art type let’s go woo!! guys is that a THREAD of string on the floor? that’s the same fabric on the coat!!

Jay (the toucher of everything + the creative one ): what’s this what’s that hey guys check this out ew this is sticky don’t come here everyone I’m gonna touch everything

also jay: ok guys I made this mini electronical gps by myself with the limited materials we found! slay!

Kai ( secret passageway finder, the riddle solver): ooo is this a lever how about this maybe this is the lever oh man THIS IS DEFINITELY a SECRET passageway oh wait no it’s not oops sorry

also kai: so I solved all fifty riddles and found 68 secret passageways do u guys think that’s good enough?

guess which team always wins.

[tawaifeddiediaz]

MS. MARVEL + title cards || 1x04 — Seeing Red

(image description under the cut)

[Image ID: 18 gifs of the title cards from Ms. Marvel, episode 4 “Seeing Red”, arranged with one long banner on the top and bottom each, and 8 images with two gifs each in the center, as a four by two grid.:

GIF 1: All the Ms. Marvel title cards flickering one after the other.

IMAGE 1: Gif 1 is of a ripped notebook style, with Ms Marvel written in Urdu above the central English text. Various images of Kamala are arranged around it, her eyes in heavier makeup than we usually see. Gif 2 is of a red circle with a large star in the center, against a slightly green background. Ms. Marvel is in the center.

IMAGE 2: Gif 1 is of Ms. Marvel written against multiple pictures of Pakistan as if out of a tourist guide, Pakistan written in Urdu in the corner. Gif 2 is a colorful, vibrant design with Ms. Marvel written in Urdu in the center.

IMAGE 3: Gif 1 is of Ms. Marvel written against radial electronic flares, blue background with bright yellow light in the center. Gif 2 has Ms. Marvel written against palm trees colored in blue-pink gradient.

IMAGE 4: Gif 1 is of Ms. Marvel written on an orange billboard on top of a building, against a clear sky. Gif 2 has Ms. Marvel written in the center in a pale yellow-green. The blue fabric has golden peacock feather designs.

IMAGE 5: Gif 1 is of Ms. Marvel written against a bright golden-yellow background with bright, colorful flowers and branches surrounding it. Gif 2 has Ms. Marvel written in Urdu text on black fabric, a circular design embroidered in golden thread in the center.

IMAGE 6: Gif 1 is of Ms. Marvel written on a piece of naan. Gif 2 has Ms. Marvel written against a green background with orange and white stripe cutting across the top-left corner.

IMAGE 7: Gif 1 is of Ms. Marvel written in Urdu in yellow on a strip of red fabric. Gif 2 has Ms. Marvel written in blue, on a pink background with multiple white designs in the background. Ms. Marvel is written in Urdu right above the English.

IMAGE 8: Gif 1 is of Ms. Marvel embroidered on pink fabric with other flowers, branches and leaves embroidered around it. Gif 2 has Ms. Marvel written as if a multi-colored neon sign.

GIF 2: A drawing of a mosque, a bushel of pink roses, three pillars of the Minar-e-Pakistan, a market. Two people are drawn on the far left; a man with a mustache, and a woman in a pink hijab. On the far right is a drawing of the flag of Pakistan. Ms. Marvel is written in the center of the gif in Urdu letters.

/end ID]

[hjartasalt]

I mean maybe them being split here makes them less powerful but like... I'm german, we have two: the health insurance one and the pension one with the pension one apparently being closer in function to a social security number but I've never heard of anyone having anything bad happen let alone having their identity stolen because someone found out either of theirs nor was I ever warned to not tell anyone. I was told to hold on to it well as I'd need to tell it to employers and government offices down the line (and I did) but never not to share it. What's up with that?? When I need to prove my identity online I just use that app that goes with my NFC enabled ID card or, back in the day, stop by the post office to prove who I am. Their system sounds so, so unsafe and idiotic, who the fuck came up with this shit

When I go to the electronics store and check out they ask me if I want them to register the purchase on my social security number or not and I go yeah sure why not and then I tell them my social security number

[secularbakedgoods]

Runners

(science fiction, 1100 words)

It’s the end of the fiscal year. Hunting season has begun.

Ultimately, it all kicked off with the invention of the “workplace transparency plan.” As ad revenue stagnated, social platforms instead offered corporate clients access to their employees’ private messages. For a small subscription fee, employers could learn who their workers were communicating with and retaliate as they saw fit.

Within months, an entire industry of talent recruiters found themselves stonewalled by a terrified workforce. With electronic communication lost to them, the recruiters — far behind on their quotas — resorted to more drastic methods.

Strive Solutions is a midsize software company on the third floor of a converted building in the old warehouse district. Its two vintage elevators are too old to support ID card readers, so a pair of security doors flanking the reception area are all that stand between potential intruders and Strive’s inner sanctum.

A few minutes past 3:00 in the afternoon, both elevators open and the mob piles out.

Runners always raid in force, the better to overwhelm any on-site security. Where once the typical recruiter was a bland, nonthreatening thirtysomething in business-casual pastels, now they trend toward linebackers’ builds and stab vests. Those who aren’t the general size and shape of a refrigerator are the most dangerous of all — quick, clever, and vicious.

Not one of them is over the age of 30. Running is a youngster’s game.

The security doors are RFID-locked, but made of glass. Somebody puts a boot through one of them, and the runners barely slow as they stampede through.

The bulk of Strive’s employees work in an open-plan area referred to as “the Pit” whenever management isn’t around. The runners swarm through it with ease, unhindered by hallways or doors, vaulting over desks and chairs when they need to.

Certain pieces of equipment are standard. Every runner carries a tablet, ruggedized to withstand all sorts of abuse and equipped with a fingerprint scanner. A simple swipe of a new recruit’s thumb and the contract is sealed, filed instantly with their new employer. Signatures were once the preferred endorsement, before someone realized a fingerprint was valid even if the owner of said finger was unconscious.

Most of the runners also carry weapons, usually truncheons or collapsible batons. Those who don’t are about to learn that Strive’s CEO has a blacksmithing hobby and an office full of medieval weapons.

The rest of a runner’s arsenal varies with personal preference.

Barry Duboc, like most of his colleagues, goes for the easy money: junior employees who are easily seduced by playground offices and extravagant launch parties, and are easily intimidated into signing anything put in front of them. Clients don’t pay much for cannon fodder like this, but Barry makes up the difference in volume.

Inside a military surplus document holder, its metal edges filed razor sharp, Barry carries photos of his client’s break lounge — stuffed wall-to-wall with vintage arcade games — and a laminated copy of their dense recreational calendar. Before long he’s herded a sizable number of impressionable young programmers away from the safety of their fellows.

A few yards away, a 6’7” runner with tattooed sclera and brass knuckles on both hands sinks his teeth into the earlobe of a production intern.

Seasoned runners like Tom Saunders know where the real money is: senior developers, not so easily swayed by treats, parties, or threats.

Tom never goes on a run without a copy of his client’s benefits package, a breakdown of their flexible working policy, and a stun gun. This time, though, Tom’s got a secret weapon: his client operates out of a refurbished boutique hotel and offers private offices to its senior employees. The promise of working behind a door that can close attracts two senior web developers, one production manager, and an automation engineer.

Shelly Fleming is a virtuoso; she glides through the bedlam of the Pit like a shark through a school of fish. Painstaking research, careful maneuvering, and perfect timing have brought her here, today, for one target alone.

Over the weekend, Strive’s lead software architect posted anonymously online about her struggles at work since transitioning. Unfortunately, the post went viral and a characteristic turn of phrase gave her away. She was summoned to Strive’s HR department ten minutes ago for a lecture on “undermining the company’s public image.”

Shelly bursts into the room with a six-figure contract and her client’s novel-length Diversity & Inclusion policy. If the architect took the time to actually read the policy, she’d quickly realize it was crafted with great care to serve as a flawless legal and political shield while entitling the company’s employees to no actual protection or recourse from discrimination. But time isn’t a luxury she has anymore.

She winds up at the center of a tug of war between Shelly and the HR manager, whose brightly painted nails carve deep lines into the architect’s arm as Shelly drags her from the room.

Of course, Strive has invested in countermeasures. An expensive renovation over the holidays transformed the entire office into a Faraday cage, ensuring no wireless signals can go in or out. The runners’ contracts are all hosted on a remote web service; they must get their prizes out of the building.

Barry ushers his pack of recruits back through reception, but the elevators take precious seconds to arrive and more to depart. Strive’s two security guards beat several of the defecting juniors unconscious before they can escape, and a particularly zealous manager drags another from the elevator as the doors close.

Tom knows better, and heads for the stairs; unfortunately, the route to the stairwell leads past Strive’s executive suite. He loses one of his recruits to a flying tackle from the COO, who adorns his desk with high school football trophies.

Shelly cased the office in advance. She leads the architect to an old fire escape at the far end of the floor, near the server room. The windows are locked, but a quick blow from Shelly’s collapsible baton and they’re both home free, clambering down the side of the building.

As quickly as it started, it’s all over.

Of the dozens of workstations arrayed throughout the Pit, almost half now sit empty. Broken glass and loose papers lie scattered across the floor, alongside a few office chairs knocked over in the chaos. Strive’s remaining workers peer uncertainly from beneath their desks.

A light breeze wafts through the shattered window.

Strive’s CEO storms and rages for an hour, cursing the disloyalty of his former employees. Then, shutting himself in his office, he places a call to his own recruiter.

(my ko-fi)

[naturalrights-retard]

By Darius Matuszak

There is a danger that the new Polish government may just waive through this oppression policy…

The agreement between the European Parliament and the Council of the European Union on the EU Digital Identity Wallet is open to abuse and gives Brussels the ability to deny people rights and control them.

According to the new European legislation, the wallets, which are to be voluntary for the time being, will include digital versions of all ID cards, driving licenses, degree certificates, and medical documentation.

The European Commission insists that the system will be secure, and the current Spanish presidency of the EU is saying that this will make the EU a digital leader at a global level in protecting democratic values, but what has digitalization got to do with European values?

On the contrary, the move actually threatens European values as argued by 504 academics and experts from 39 countries who have signed an open letter warning of the dangers to people’s online security and freedom.

The pandemic moved us in this direction when the Covid-19 vaccine passports were introduced and limited the right to travel. The new wallet will move us much further in the direction of oppression.

Having all documents in one place means that they can be confiscated in one click. This was done by the Trudeau administration in Canada when, during Covid, it denied vaccine-refusers access to their accounts and later removed insurance rights from drivers participating in the protest blockade of the capital, Ottawa.