#Even though I'm not so pround of this...

[blueepink07]

Amane symbolism - evil eyes

Before going further I want to say that this is made for fun!! Don't take things too seriously!

I will analyse Amane's eyes!

(If you don't know, I made something similar for Mahiru and Muu, so this short part will be just me repeating what evil eyes mean)

~Evil eyes~

I know that this is about jewelry, but the yellow and green evil eyes have really interesting meanings that I think it relates with Amane's case.

Now, into the analysis!

~yellow evil eyes~

Some short meanings!

The yellow evil eye can represent the cult's ideals. The happiness and positivity is something seen in Amane's MV and maybe also in this one. The cult made Amane believe that everything they teach her is for her own happiness and such, the punishments are a way to bring positivity in her life. Usually, religion can be a form of bringing someone inner peace and be a stress and anxiety relief. And Amane's is often shown saying that she'll be fine, because her God will protect her.

Moreover, the yellow evil eye symbolises lack of distractions, concentration and attentiveness. Amane states that she never went to an amusement park or karaoke. She was more preoccupied to be a "good and diligent daughter" who studies to make her father pround.

The cult also has strict rules, which are presented in her first MV. Wake up early, study, clean or help around. Amane tries her best to listen to these rules, not only as a way to show that she's loyal to the cult, but also to not receive any punishments for her "disobedience".

~Green evil eyes~

Short meanings! (ignore the 4 from the last picture!!)

The green evil eye may symbolise Amane's desires to make the cult pround. The evil green eye, also symbolies happiness and good fortune, as the yellow one, showing how Amane wants to learn and use the cult's beliefs. And we see her actively doing this, being strong and trying to constantly be a proper example. During trial 1, we often saw Amane studying, even in Milgram prison, in order to not stay behind with the materials. She also was asking for tips to improve her skills.

Kotoko and Amane

"Amane: Thank you very much for teaching me……but, though I realise it’s strange me saying this after I asked you, I must admit it’s kind of unexpected. You give off the impression of someone who wouldn’t want to get involved in things like this.

Kotoko: ……well, you’re not wrong. I’m surrounded by people who could all be murderers, so I don’t plan on going out of my way to talk and make friends. I can’t let my guard down. But I like ambitious people like you. If you want to study more, then I’m happy to teach.

Amane: I see…You look scary at first impression, but I quite like the way you treat everyone equally regardless of whether they’re older or younger than you. You don’t just treat me like a child or anything like that.

Kotoko: Treat you like a child? Hah, you’ve got to be kidding. Back when I was your age, I was already the person I am today. I don’t have any plans to let you get away with something just “because you’re a child.” ……remember that. There, I’ve finished marking. 83%. How do I put it… Even though you act like this, it’s not like you’re super brilliant at studying or anything, huh."

Shidou and Amane

"Amane: …what’s wrong, Shidou-san? Your hand has stopped marking. This is mathematics, so there’s no questions about the answers. If I got something wrong, please mark it with an X.

Shidou: I… I just don’t understand. If everything about MILGRAM is true… why did a child like you have to become a murderer? Just imagining what sort of circumstances must have led to that, it makes me so sad…

Amane: ……*sigh*. Is that right. I don’t think I’m going to get along with you, Shidou-san. I don’t agree with the fact you refuse to acknowledge that I have my own free will, and that I should be held accountable for my actions, just because I’m a child. I may have only been alive for 12 years, but all the choices I’ve made, even if they weren’t the best ones, were entirely my own. What point is there in you getting sad when I have no regrets myself? …please give me back my test. It seems you don’t have the concentration levels required to be my teacher. I’m going to get Kotoko-san to teach me instead.

Shidou: Amane…I don’t think that’s true. However smart you may be…… you’re still just a child."

Amane's goals or dreams are to make her cult and parents pround! Her first MV is all about her trying to be the best version of herself. From a simple girl, to an angel, showing how she reached her best version, the one that everyone is pround of...

Also some lyrics from her first MV that show Amane's wish to become better.

Thank you for reading! ~🧿

[cookieclover]

14th attack for Artfight 2024 - Spectra (@mal-ware3) <3

I'm so happy with the hands, even though they may not be perfect I'm still kinda pround :>

[lotusmi]

lotus how not to notice in 3d? i can't.. i wake up discouraged knowing how my life is here, and with that i can't live in 4d

it's like, my dad is blind. i believe and affirm he can see, but he needs me for everything and i can't affirm this anymore yk..

there are other things but this is one of the hardest

hi angel 💗

First I want to say I'm so pround of you bcs i'ts it's a very beautiful attitude of yours to heal your dad.

Ok, so, you have to learn that 4d changes 3d. "Imagination is the only reality".

At the point you decided your dad can see perfectly, it's done. It's done because god is your imagination, and what you imagine, the world will reflect. “Daring To Assume That All Things Are Possible To Imagine, Put This One Reality To The Extreme Test By Assuming You Are The Person You Would Like To Be. Your Reasonable Mind And Outer Senses May Deny It; But I Promise You: If You Will Persist, You Will Receive Your Assumption." - Neville Goddard. I also am in love with those 4 subs about 3d reality, i love subs and it helped me a lot in my life, so i recommend those: velmental living in the end, 3d is a illusion by cherry, god state by leviathan . [I can do a playlist for you if you all want]

"All changes must first come from within himself; and if he does not change on the outside it is because he has not changed within. But man does not like to feel that he is solely responsible for the conditions of his life" - Neville Goddard.

If you decided what you want, it's yours, it's yours black point. Your desire is yours NOW, how you feel? Ignore 3d because you don't have to accept it, accept if you want. It's YOUR reality, you have the power here. And all you have to do is decide is yours, done, and persist. Ignore everything you don't like. You father can see NOW, he asked your help? in 3d, not in 4d. In 4d he is healed. Even if the 3d is in front of your eyes "be still and know I'm god". Repeat your affirmations if you like, "im so happy my father can see", "im so pround of myself". You can also affirm "Its so easy for me to live in the end, like- i already have all my desires now? Im so pround of my self!! Im so powerful etc etc"

Have fun ignoring, what you see in the world is only real if you want. You don't have to assume nor accept something that you don't like.

"You cannot fail, for an assumption, though false, if persisted in will harden into fact." - Neville Goddard.

You cannot fail! You cannot fail. Believe yourself. Have faith, test it. It's done. Love your assumptions, love them deeply, they are yours.

[sweeethinny]

Jilytober - Day 20

“Someone needs to help keep your ego under control” - day twenty

jily lives and James is a pround dad :)

@jilytoberfest

----

“My eleven-year-old son,” James said, still bewildered, grinning like an idiot. ''My eleven-year-old son is the youngest seeker of the century!'' He looked at Lily, unable to contain his joy.

''I know you said you expected him to be a great Quidditch player, but I don't think you expected that,'' She said, barely able to stop smiling too, even though she was a little worried about how it would weigh on Harry's shoulders. She would talk to him about it later via floo…

''I would never have thought this was possible! My fourteen year old self who was trying to make the team for the third time would be devastated if a little eleven year old boy was chosen before me!'' But James didn't look sad, in fact Lily didn't think he'd smiled so much in the last few days like now.

''Well, someone needs to help keep your ego under control,'' Lily shrugged, eating another piece of the corn cake she'd bought.

''My ego under control?'' James stood up. ''As if that would help!'' He walked to the pantry, picking up his shoes and cloak. ''I'm going to tell everyone at work today, I'm going to visit Sirius and Remus and show everyone this! It did nothing but boost my ego! My son, my beautiful son, is the youngest seeker of the century! HA, I've never been so happy!''

''I'll pretend this doesn't offend our wedding day.''

“Lils… Petals, I love you so much but… are you the youngest player of the century?” James smiled, looking at her with raised eyebrows. ''I don’t think so.''

[twary]

Can the pillarmen headcanon(a higher life form and they live with the reader)/reader?

The reader is in a band on stage, and for the pillarmen this is probably the first time they've been in someone else's concert, like, their first concert at all, also with their nice man acting as host and singing with guitar.

I was inspired by these video songs. If you can, the reader and her colleagues have vampire clothes and they sing either the same song as in the first short clip or something similar (I'm throwing in two links, from the second one you can borrow the the very appearance on stage for the reader)

Maybe the pillarmen would like the look of their sweet human and the song ? After performing on stage, pulled into a kiss Hehehehe;3

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_FDQ3bCs1EM

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gmheHaw_kic

mmm?

oh gOD, YOU JUST THROW THE HEX GIRLS ON MY ASK BOX?!😳

I remember watching Scooby Doo and having a GIGANT crush on these girls ghurfiuyesrgt help🥴🥴

Cut for length~

Kars

Doesn't wants to go to the show, since he is sooooo busy being a God🙄

You personally asked him to go...He will appear in the show :D

Doesn't was prepared to see you in "vampire" clotches and sings this kind of music. He though you were more boring😜

Honestly think that you should be the one performing on the stage. Also, those leather clothes are perfect for you. You look hot asf and it turns him on.

After the perform you were nervous to know what he will say about your show.

"Hm, not bad, I guess. I just think that you should wear clothes like this more often..." He says in a, rare, playful tone while look you up and down. You smile in return, you know that's his way to say "you were wonderful"💜

He pulls you closer by the waist and kiss your dark lips. He licks the stain that your lipstick left on his lips😳

Wamuu

Your, secretly, biggest fan. You usually ask him to hear you singing and give u a feedback. He is always polite, but inside he is just like a crazy fan :D

You doesn't had time to ask hom to go to the show, so you were a little sad that he wasn't going to appear. But well, he already knew about the show, he is there!

The way you usually dress is perfect, but he can't help having a gooooood look at your performance clothes😏

You're so talented, he is pround of you!

Is easy to spot Wam in the crowd, I mean, he is a 6ft tall guy. You're very happy that he is here!💚

Before the show he take your little hands in his "You were perfect" the man places a kiss in your forehead with a smile on his face.

He is shy to say more than that, but just he eyes manage to say everything.

Esidici

Since he discovered about your little band he doesn't stop mocking you.

Ohoho a show? He will surely appear, even if you don't want to😌

He regrets every provocation, you are so awesome in the stage!

He keep shaking his arms, like "I'M HEEEEERE, NOTICE MEEE"

After, the only show that he saw, he is already the biggest fan of you :D

After the show you were expecting him to mock you, as always. But wait, what? He gets you up in the air and hug you "You were awnsome! All humans should be like you! Oh, you also look hot asf with those clothes"

What to say, this is Esidici you take his hands while you two keep walking and he doesn't stop talking about the show...And you🧡

[hwrryscherry]

The one where model Y/N is attacked in Paris.

blurb: Harry and Model Y/N are in Paris for Fashion Week 2020 earlier this year. To celebrate her first time walking for Gucci, Harry decides to take her out for a dinner date when a crazy youtube prankster attacks her while leaving the restaurant and Harry get furious as standing up to defend his girl.

word count: 3.5K

warning: rude and disrespectful attitude, invasion of personal space, violence, anxiety attack quote. DON’T read it if you feel uncomfortable.

author’s note: HIII, I know this took me a while. I was working on it when I got a cold and just couldn’t think of anything to finish writing this, but I’m much better now for god’s sake. I’d like to apologize with whoever requested this for taking such a long time to post it and say a huge thank you or requesting this too! This is completely inspired by what happened to Gigi Hadid in 2016(I guess) and I remember seeing this video and thinking why someone would do that, also, Gigi said once that the guy was lucky Zayn wasn’t with her sooooo I guess I just think Harry would be so furious because even though he’s a very chill guy, his girl safety and well being is the one thing that matters the most to him.

gigi’s video for the ones who didn’t see it: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IjsPmjqmcvs

       February 27th, 2020

   Today was the first time that you ever walked for Gucci, and it was amazing, you were beyond happy because getting where you are today being a short model and only being 22 years old it's something to be proud of. It hasn't been easy all the time but you were slowly making your way to the top and that's more than enough. And you were highly grateful for Harry either, of course you walked Gucci's show because of your talent and hard working and no one doubted that, but Harry did a important role in your newest contract with Gucci because you met the team because of him and his Gucci obsession. But anyway, the fashion show was amazing, and you had Harry on the crowd cheering for you all the time and God, he was so proud! He couldn’t even handle himself. He was recording everything and even got up when you did the catwalk next to him as he kept taking multiple pictures. If you have to be real, almost 90% of those pictures looked really bad because he wasn't focusing on the phone but he also wanted to register this moment and when you'd look through them later you'd actually laugh because most of them had a very blur image.

    When the fashion show ended, he had to congratulate you backstage. As you were starting to take off your outfit, you listened to your boyfriend's rough voice making you turn around to face him and see the biggest smile on his face, you could clearly see his dimples on the side of his cheek. He walked over to you instantly wrapping his strong arms around your figure hugging you so tight that you were even afraid that he would get the feat of ruining the rest of clothes you still had on.

— You were so great, I'm so pround of you! — Harry said on a low tone next to your ear before breaking the hug and looking carefully to your face. You had this crazy green eyeshadow that were halfway gone by now which caused him to chuckle — I love your eye look, it looks fabulous! — Harry said making you bend over to stare at the mirror behind you only realizing now you haven't finished taking off your makeup yet. You stand straight again giving him a mocking expression as you grabbed the makeup wipe you were using from the makeup table behind both of you.  

— I know, I'm thinking about wearing this everywhere because it's just really fashion! — you ironically said taking a smirk out of him as you turned around sitting on the chair in front of the mirror so you could have a sight of how you're makeup were doing — But thank you, you know I appreciate it!

— I do! And that's why I'll congratulate you by taking you out for dinner tonight! — Harry said walking towards you resting his hands on both of your shoulders squeezing them gently as he bends over giving you a small kiss on your neck.

— Oh, like a dinner date? — You'd ask with a smirk on as you felt goosebumps on your kiss with his little kiss.

— Exactly like a dinner date! And later, we can have our own private celebration! — He'd say with a  smirk on his lips as you finished taking your makeup off — What d' you think? Sounds good? — He asked you and you nodded at him and just some minutes later you both were out stage going back to your hotel in Paris. Harry called Jeff and asked him if he could make a reservation for both of you for tonight around 8 pm and he glady did, so as it was already 6 pm and as you both were probably the one couple in the world who takes the longest to get ready, you'd come back to the hotel and started getting ready already.

    Jeff made an appointment for both of you to go to Le Cinq restaurant which is located near the Eiffel Tower and Arc of Triumph. You absolutely loved Paris at night, for some reason it seemed more magical and interesting to you. The weather, the lights, the fashion and the language that you learned to master well through the years warmed your heart whenever you’d go there. When you were a child, you got used to always hearing your mom tells you:’’whenever you’re in love, go to Paris’’, and for this reason Paris was one of the first places where you and Harry traveled together as couple. Harry didn’t use to travel a lot for by the way. MOst of the time, he used to travel for work, so this changed a lot since you started dating because you love to travel. You’ve always been a free spirit person, the kind of person that goes wherever the winds takes you so with the time Harry became like this too as you started taking him to do the craziest things on the craziest places around the world.

    You felt the car slower it’s velocity as it got closer to the front of the restaurant, and you both could see by the window that the front was packed. As it was Paris Fashion Week, there were a lot of celebrities in the city and usually, fans settled in front of popular places around the city hoping they’d have a chance to meet their favorite celebs and even though you were already used to crowds at this point of your life, they’d still make you a little nervous, especially when it was in places not well known to you like a city you don’t live on.

— You’ll have to guide me because these shoes are really high and I don't want to step on anyone's feet — You said to Harry while putting your phone in the small black Prada bag you carried with you with your head down looking carefully to it because you’ve lost the count of how many times you thought you had put the phone inside your bag and you didn’t.

— It's alright! Hold my hand because there are a lot of people here! — Said Harry bringing his left hand up to your face to put a lock of hair of yours that fell in your face behind your ear and you nodded to him. Harry was really protective over you, and he has been that way since the beginning of your relationship. He’d always put your safety first anytime you’d go out together. When it was his about his concerts, you’d usually discuss about the fact that you want to be in the audience and he wants you to be backstage. It’d taken you a few minutes to convince him that everything was going to be fine, but it would also have days that it didn’t matter how much time you try to convince him he’d beg you to stay backstage so he could be relaxed during the performance. But you were grateful for him being that way, you were grateful that he cared so much about your well being because you know exactly how much some relationships can be destructive and you felt lucky to have someone this good in your life. Of course he wasn’t perfect, neither of you were but who is? He tried his best and that’s what matters the most.

    But anyway, Harry held your hand tightly and opened the car door, immediately feeling the camera’s flashes burning your faces and listening to some fans starting to shout. Harry’s bodyguards got between both of you and the crowd guiding your way to the entrance of the restaurant and you felt the heat from the crowd instantly even though the weather in Paris was only 59°F, it’d feel lot warmer until you entered the place. And that is one special kind of a place, The decoration was perfectly splendid, gorgeous and marvelous if you must say. The touches of gold and light blue mixed with the yellow coloration of lights and the spectacular french food scent brought a cozy and elegant vibe.The restaurant was a little full, nothing out of the common and you observed the many different sizes of tables and the groups of people in it.

    You both were taken to your table that was located next to the windows but wasn’t actually on the windows at it still had people outside and it feels weird to eat with people watching you. Anyway, Harry as the gentleman he is pulled the chair for you as he always did even though you had told him there’s no need for that. You both ordered glasses of your favorite white wine, neither of you were heavy drinkers but as it was a celebration it was much needed. The date happened naturally, just as all the laughing, talking and even gossips. This the casual couple gossip that you two would have, but it happened naturally. None of you ever felt like you had to pretend to be anybody else except yourself around each other.

    During the night, Harry would get lost in your face admiring your features while you’re talking. He would admire the way your eyebrows move when you’d change expressions, the way your eyes would form a very tiny line when you tried to see something that was away from you, he’d admire your smile and the sound of your laugh anytime you’d remember of something funny or he’d tell you something funny and he’d think of how lucky he is to have you, because even though he knows that sometimes he can be a pain in the ass(just as you can too) , you’re very lucky to have one another and to have someone who would make you feel this great and free about who you are. Because who you are is exactly who you need to be. Of course both of you believes that changing and envolving it’s the most important thing to do and sometimes you’d be surprised to see how much you both grew from the beginning of your relationship until today and that would bring smile to your faces. He feels lucky to be able to call you his girl, and god you loved when he’d do it. You loved when he was about to present you to someone and say ‘’This is my girl Y/N’’, it’d cause you to open a big smile because it felt natural. You’re his and he’s yours, period.

    When you both decided it was time to call it a night Harry paid the check against what you wanted because you wanted to pay this time. You’d honestly hate to have people paying for you, and this would usually be a point of discussion between you and Harry. You don't know why but you hate it, and it's just the gentleman in Harry wanting to spoil his girl again and again until he get tired of doing it, but he never does.

   You were about to leave the restaurant when Harry slid his right hand around your waist bringing you closer to him very calmly to kiss your cheek.

— I know you want to say hi to everyone but just walk to the car, alright? — He'd lowly talk next to your ear making you look at him with a serious expression — It's for your safety, love! It's late now, and we don't know who's there. — And he was right, it was past midnight now and there were still some people out there. How can they stand there in this cold weather? But anyway, you agreed with him as you both walked your way to outside. You felt flashes again, blinding flashing lights making you look to the ground as Harry held his hand on the back of your back guiding you to the car.

    As you walked towards the car, you felt a small hand touch your arm and you looked over to see a little girl with probably 12 or 13 years. She pursued tired eyes, and your heart ached with just the thought of keeping walking back to the car because you had no idea of how much time she’s been outside waiting for you so you stopped walking and bend down a little to get close to her height which made Harry stops walking immediately looking a little surprised but he understood when he saw you taking a picture with the little girl and how your face lightens up after it. You asked her what was her name and her age and she answered that her name was Lily and she was 13 she told you that she wants to be a model just like you when she grows older and that melted your heart. You smiled at her and told her that she could do whatever she wanted to and told her that when she grows up and becomes a model, you’d love to walk a show with her. When you’d stand up again you saw Harry looking at you with a small smile on his lips. He couldn’t deny he loves your kindness to every person in the world. It made his heart happy to know that he’s with someone with the same life philosophy than him. So he turned around to open the car door for you when you felt two strong arms wrap around your waist lifting you up and you froze.

— What the fu... — You'd shout before starting to hit him on his arms with your elbows as you'd move your legs trying to kick him with your heels. You'd feel flashes on your face and heat on your body increasing. It was the adrenaline and you were furious at this point. — Get...Off...Me — You'd shout as you'd hit his face with your elbows as well, Harry looked over to you and stormed out. He'd swear he'd never been like this in his life, he'd basically run to behind the guy's back and put his arm around his neck, Harry'd give him a punch right in the middle of his back and a slightly kick on the back of his knee to destabilise the guy which put you free by the moment he started to fall. Harry's bodyguard would hold you immediately trying to push you away from the crowd as you looked at Harry pushing the guy away from you.

— What the fuck were you doing? — Harry'd shout right into the man's face and watch as the man started to walk away from the crowd but Harry would go after him. Harry swears to god he couldn't even feel his body at the time. He was completely numb, moved by adrenaline and all he wanted to do was to beat the shit out of that man. — WHO THE FUCK ARE YOU? — Harry'd shout walking after him getting no response which just made him angrier. At that time he didn't care about the cameras or whoever was watching him, he couldn't calm down when someone threated his girl safety and personal space. It didn't even need to be you. If he saw anyone threatening a woman's safety, he'd freak out in anger.

   You felt the bodyguards strong hands trying to push you away from the situation because that's what Harry would want him to do. He tried walking you towards the car, but you were reluctantly screaming for Harry because he could get himself hurt if he didn't come back to the car now. The other bodyguard walked after Harry grabbing him by the arm and Harry turned over to look at him with so much anger on his look and you'd swear you never saw him like this but then he did started walking over to you again.

   You finally entered the car and closed the door. You felt in panic. Basically paralyzed, you felt your anxiety attacking and your hands shaking. You could literally hear your heart beating so fast and loud that it scares you.

— Go get him! Follow him to hell. I don't care! Take him to the police office! — You'd listen to Harry talks firmly to his bodyguards as he opened the car's door and entered in it. He took a deep breath and turned his face to look at you. His heart broke at that moment. You were a mess. You couldn't even feel the tears leaving your eyes, but he did see them. He saw your hands shaking and how scared your eyes looked and at that moment all of his anger left his body — Love... — He'd sigh getting closer to you while wrapping his arms around your now-fragile figure. He could feel your entire body shaking on his arms. He caressed your hair with one of his hands as he hugged you tight to calm you down. He'd look to the driver and make a sign for him to start driving back to your hotel — Are ya okay? You're hurt? Did he hurt you? — He'd talk on a calm tone squeezing you a little on his arms. You'd lift your head up to look at him with red wet eyes shaking your head to him.

— I'm sorry! — You'd say lowly. He did tell you to walk straight to the car, and you didn't listen to him.

— It's not your fault, love! — He'd say wiping some of your tears and then carefully kissing both of cheeks — Don't worry about it, everything's gonna be fine, alright? It's okay!

   You'd spent the rest of the ride in silence. A comfortable silence. You'd be laying your head on his shoulder while holding his head getting your breathing and heart back to normal and your phones would start buzzing with notifications of what happened but none of you would see it, not now.

   When you got to your hotel, you'd get out of the car in the garage. You'd both walk slowly to the elevator and slowing to your room. You entered the room going directly to the king sized bed and throwing yourself in it because you felt like getting in a coma and just waking up to a time where all this drama would go away. Harry'd walk towards you and sit in bed beside you. He'd put both of his hands on your shoulders massaging them slowly.

— I'll prepare you a bath, so you can relax a little before sleeping, how's that sound? — He'd say trying to cheer you up a little bit.

— Sounds great, thank you love! — You'd turn your head to look at him with a forced smile on your lips. Harry'd bend down to kiss your hair line before leaving to the bathroom.

   He'd try his best to make you feel the most comfortable to sleep tonight. He'd prepare you a bath. He'd give you a message, he'd brush your hair for you but actually, he loves to do that. He loves to brush your hair before you go to bed, it was more like a routine for you both. He loves to feel your long locks on his fingers and to feel the sweet scent of it. He'd cuddle you until you fall asleep too, he'd even be the big spoon tonight so you could sleep on his chest breathing his perfume because he hoped that'd make you have a good night of sleep.

   And after you did, he'd look on the things on his phone. All the posts about you being attacked in Paris and him beating the guy who did it were just too much and he felt sorry that you'd have to see and read all of those stuff as soon as you unblock your phone. A lot of your friends texted him asking what happened and if you were ok. He'd answer the closest ones only, like his mom and Gemma, your mom, Bella and Jeff. He didn't know what you'll decide about the next fashion shows you had to walk, but he also knows that no one would blame you if you just chose to come back home in NYC.

  Harry didn't sleep at that night at all, he couldn't stop looking for what happened and why it happened. The next day, it was everywhere in the media and later you'd found out that the guy was a youtuber and he was making a prank when he posted his stupid youtube vlog with "I pranked Harry Styles's girlfriend and he punched me" as a title. You'd sue him for sure. You don't like taking those kind of actions, but it was necessary, he had to understand that you cannot disrespect people like this, specially people you don't know.

  After that you'd probably understand why Harry is so protective over you and Harry would actually get ten times more protective, if I had to be honest. But as the time passed by and quarantine came you both would leave it behind and move on with your life because in the end of the day you both will still have one another.

[baliwashere77]

161.6! I am just over a pound away from my third goal weight!!!

I haven't done a pro-con list in a minute, so I'm going to make a new one.

(WARNING: It is going to be explicit, in both categories. Mentions of sex and bowel movements, if these things bother you PLEASE DO NOT READ FARTHER).

Pros:

Jeans that didn't fit/gave me a really noticeable muffin top now are starting to get loose on me. It's really flattering.

I've been able to pull old shirts I haven't worn in almost two years out. Just last night my SO mentioned how well one I was brave enough to put on again looked.

While it can be scary wearing clothes I knew wouldn't fit, the new confidence to try!

My arms, legs, and stomach, are getting thinner. My breasts are too but this is a pro for me. I have always hated big boobs on myself.

People ARE noticing now. I'm down just under 24 pounds! I've just blamed my job (training people is a really labor intensive thing in my field).

The few times I've ordered junk food, I don't feel like people are judging me as harshly anymore, including the service workers.

Sex is a lot more fun with my SO. They're able to pick me up, I feel more flexible and we can move more easily. They really noticed the changes here.

People are starting to look at me with attraction. I'm not interested as I'm with someone who I love dearly (I'm married) but I can't say getting flattering looks isn't nice.

Cons:

Pooping. Jesus. Christ. It's either constipation or straight diarrhea. Frankly I'm not sure which one is worse, and if you do get through the constipation it's literally like rabbit shit. At least I'm not afraid of clogging toliets anymore.

I struggle to eat more sometimes. I'm a type one diabetic so there are times I need to eat more for safety reasons and my stomach feels like it'll rip apart. I can't eat a lot at dinners or I get too full. I know this is usually seen as a good thing but it can dangerous for me.

People are getting really really concerned. Many people are now trying to force me to eat. I was sitting at work and around three people watched me eat soup. I was very self conscious. I'm not even joking, literally three co-workers watched me eat a whole cup of soup until I finishes. 🙃

No matter how proud I am of the weight I've lost (I'm literally at my lowest weight, right now), it's a short lived victory before obsessing again about losing. I remember how pround I was to get to 172. Now I'm impatient to get into the 150s.

I'm chronically aware of the negative effects. I'm not ignoring it. I am hurting myself and I do actually care. I have simply accepted the situation and I don't plan on recovering yet. The change in my digestive issues alone have made me worried.

The ugly truth is that I'm really tired of looking for the lowest calories items ane snacks. I'm tired of working out just to make sure I'm not over my calorie limits. I'm tired of not eating because I love food, cooking my favorite recipes, and have given up so many comfort foods to fit this life. The ugly truth is that I'm going to keep going because I honestly believe I'll be happier when I finally get small enough. The numbers going down are worth it to me. It's an ugly thought though.

The god damn chronic fatigue. Most mornings I feel fuzzy in my head, and really weak.

[moonster-underswap]

Hey what is the design that made you feels pround of doing it?

I'd say I am proud of the designs I came up with for every character revealed so far, even though some might subject to change later. But I'm most proud of this little mage here:

Fun fact: Frisk has multiple exclusive designs, by the way. That's just what you'll see often.

[stories-that-feed-our-souls]

乔家的儿女 The Bond | Review

The last couple of years I totally changed my taste for dramas. Maybe because what's happening to the world right now, but I switched from loving slice of life dramas to only consuming wuxia and xianxia and all those kind of fantasy chinese stories, becoming completely unable to truly enjoy some more realistic stories, specially from China. But in the last couple of months, there's been a few production that really were able to catch my attention, one being "Crush", wich I already talked in another post, other being "The day of becoming you" even though I don't know if it fit in the "realistic" genre, but neither of them has amazed me more that the story of the Qiao family.

《乔家的儿女》 (lit. The children of the Qiao family) it's a 36 episodes chinese drama from 2021 based on the novel of the same name by Wei Xi (未夕). It follows the life of the Qiao family, from 1977 to 2006, when the eldest brother, Yicheng, being only a 11 years old, had to take the responsability of raising his younger sibling after their mother's death and the negligence of their father, who only cares about himself.

This review might contain some minor spoilers

Story

There's a few thing I want to talk about. For some people this kind of stories may be slow or "boring", but let me tell you there's nothing to worry about in that aspect. We get catch at the very beginning by this family's dynamic: a family where the mom has just died for giving birth to their 5th son, where the father thinks their children can fend for themselves, and the 4 children (and one newborn) that sometimes don't have too much to eat.

How can we not get attached or at least get concerned by these kids wellbeing? Seeing how an eleven years old boy had to raise his sibling, having to confront in multiple times his father to give them money to survive, and how later having to become their father figure, even when they were already all adults, make me really anxious but at the end of the day very pround of Yicheng.

The characters are very well wrtitten. The sibling have very distinct personalities: Yicheng the protector one, Erqian the sensitive one, Sanli the down to earth one, Simei the free spirit and Qiqi the shy one. The writters take those traids and they keep their characters loyals to them, but that doesn't mean there is no character development, quite the opposite, every one of them chages a lot during those 30 years, but in a way that's believable. The develompment is according to their expiriences, their traumas and archivements. Their development doesn't feel like is for the convenience of the plot.

They also provided us with down to earth relationships. In the real world, for most mortals, you don't meet your partners in an accident, or when meeting your childhood rival or any of those cliché scenes that are overly use in dramaland. Your partners end up being your classmate, your coworkers or the friend of your friend, and you built a relationship before falling over heels for that person and, even so, those relationships can fail. Mariage is not the end of the road. Different goals in life, family's relationship, affairs, and the memories of past lovers can ruin those relationships and this dramas show you that that is okay, and that you can heal, forgive and keep going on with your life.

Acting

What can I say? the cast was perfect. You really belive every line the actors and actress say... and sometimes they don't need to say nothing at all to get their emotions. Even the kids outshine some actors out there.

But for me, who undeniable shine is Song Zu'er, our little Qiao Simei. This girl truly expressed every single emotions. There is an scene in episode 29 you can pinpoit the second her hearts breaks in half yes I'm quoting Bart Simpson but it defenitly applies for that scene.

OST

The instrumentals for this production is on the softess side. The tracks never distract you from what happening in the scene and that is because all the emotions are well displayed by the actors, the music doesn't need to be on the spotlight.

Now, on the other hand, the songs. I was a little bit sceptical about the songs, in part 'cause it wasn't a genre I was used to, they needed to work for a story that covers 3 decades, but a few episodes in and I was in love with some of them, specially Wild Bird 《野鸟》 by A RUN 金润吉 and Blank 《留白》 by Juno Su 苏诗丁. It really hurts me that the last one is not on spotify because IT'S BEAUTIFUL.

Technical aspects

Can we appreciate attention to detail the production team put in this drama? Like I said, this story covers 30 years of the Qiao family and of course places like the main room in the Qiao house change... but it happens so gradually that you don't even notice at least is a very obvious change that the characters bring on, like buying a new TV or a new refrigerator, otherwise you are completly oblivious until the change in the room is too big to go unnoticed. Or the meals, you can see how their meals start to get better as the sibling start to work.

Is facinating to see the change in the city, the offices and the tecnology, specially the phones, how many memories were triggered by those ringtones!

Also, the color grade was so warm, giving us that nostalgic feeling that the whole production tries to make us feel, archiving it beautifuly.

Final thoughts

乔家的儿女 The Bond is a very realistic story with a very nostalgic feeling about the bond some sibling built over the years out of neccesity, but also out of love. We can see how they overcome difficulties with time and efforts, and how love and life is not always rosy, but is also not as bad as one tend to believe. We can heal and go on with our life no matter what.

Rating: 10/10

[your-mom-friend]

I posted 1,213 times in 2021

42 posts created (3%)

1171 posts reblogged (97%)

For every post I created, I reblogged 27.9 posts.

I added 137 tags in 2021

#fandom posts - 20 posts

#rem rambles - 18 posts

#dammit tumblr - 16 posts

#life advice - 13 posts

#crack post - 13 posts

#info dump - 13 posts

#rr crit - 12 posts

#donations - 11 posts

#fun facts - 11 posts

#signal boost - 10 posts

Longest Tag: 101 characters

#i'm lucky because i share a bed with my sister and she would skin me alive if i didn't do it properly

My Top Posts in 2021

#5

Maybe I should make this a series I seem to be watching a lot

Right so I'm watching Saiki K. I'm only in season 2 but like

- Precious boy. I love him.

- rb to give him all the coffee jelly in the world he deserves it

- "I don't have any friends all these people that hang around me are just annoyances"

-"But I will routinely go out of my way to make sure they're happy" -Teruhashi's brother. Jail. Take him to jail.I won't bother myself to remember his name

-Kusuke. Maximum security Prison. Like rn. How has he not been arrested already? This man is kind of off his rocker and dangerously unstable. He has almost no boundaries. I think not killing people is a boundary he has but I hold no expectations for it. He pretty much tried to KILL his little brother like, several times

-Possibly the best part of this series is when Kusuo uses his powers for bigger things. Like the world-wide mind control thing. Or saving Yumehara. Or training with his powers. That one particular scene where the loan shark guys try to kidnap him and he fuckin' decimates them (gotta say, I like the whole evil look for him).

-Our aroace icon. i Love him for that.

-His whole friendship with Akechi. They've been through a lot. The idea of Kusuo never telling people about his powers because he told the one friend he did have and ended up destroying a classroom is so sad.

-I kind of really want there to be a Saiki Protection Squad. He gets in trouble and EVERYONE is there to bail him out of it. Kokomi, Kaido, Nendo, Aren, Hairo, Mikoto, Reita, everyone. Viciously.

-PK Academy Psychic Kids God Bless.

-The fact that he keeps repeating Junior year to stop the volcano

-He wants to keep a low profile but his friends include: the most popular girl, the most popular guy, a former gang leader and two out and pround psychics. I love kaido and Nendo but they're probably his most normal friends

64 notes • Posted 2021-10-20 16:19:24 GMT

#4

Okay I am so in love with the idea of Kusuke being like, just a smidge insane. Like he's not dangerously obsessed with Kusuo he's just a normal obsessed when you're a genius with a god-like being as your baby brother.

I read it from a fic (definitely check out everything written by Suikorin on AO3 they're so good) but Kusuke's hair being the way it is because Kusuo burned him as a kid by accident. Learning to sleep only 17 minutes a night because he was so busy trying to invent the limiters.

Also the limiters being less so that Kusuo didn't destroy everything, and more because Kusuke didn't want to see Kusuo get hurt or upset by his ever-growing powers.

Them messing around and using so much force because they're literally the only ones they can go all out with. Never trying to actually kill each other though. And of course, they both use the "I'm telling mom!" card and it WORKS because Saiki Kurumi is a force to be reckoned with.

Getting older and Kusuke gets involved in a lot of dangerous shit but he's never scared because a) he is always 8 steps ahead of his enemies and b) Kusuo is always watching, and can and will come in and kick ass to save his brother.

They are very, very protective of each other, even if people don't usually see it. Kusuo is more subtle about it to not draw attention but Kusuke can see his influence. He, however, has no such qualms and can, will, and has pulled a gun on people who so much as look at his brother (or sister, depending on whether Kuriko makes an appearance) the wrong way. Kusuo appreciates it, even when he acts annoyed. Maybe it's nice to be the one being protected for once (even if he doesn't actually need it)

95 notes • Posted 2021-10-28 08:56:49 GMT

#3

So I've been watching Assassination Classroom

Dear fuck I need to stop my exams are like 2 days from now

anyway y'all know how it is. Long post so buckle up

-I was pretty skeptical to watch it but my sister convinced me

-I love it so much

-I've just finished season 1 and I have opinions

-The whole series really hinges of Korosensei just deciding to teach a class for no reason huh. Like I feel like if they tried to logically answer "why does an octopus intent on destroying Earth want to spend the last year dutifully teaching middle schoolers?" the whole show would fall apart

-and I love it

-The opening scene of them firing on him as soon as he entered was iconic

-Really didn't like Karma at first. Kinda unhinged, even for this class. Especially when he tried to jump off a fuckin cliff what the FUCK Karma. I know the saying is "Karma's a bitch" but I didn't mean it like this.

-Nagisa. My son. Please protect him. I love him so much. The only one with a brain cell to record weaknesses.

-Damn I kinda...really don't like Irina. Like idk if that'll be a hot take in this fandom but what the fuck. Why would you try to seduce a middle schooler. Why kiss his brain out. What the fuck lady. I don't give a shit about you being a trained assassin part of that is reading a room and this room certainly wasn't spelling out "seduce the nearest child for information"

-Like I know she isn't a bad person and is a professional when she needs to be but I can't get over that initial thing. I might be biased but whatever.

-Also, Karasuma. 10/10 character. No flaws. Absolutely perfect. He's their dad. He gave them all a number to call in case they needed anything. They've al individually, without any input from anyone else, made the ringtone "You are my daAD, BOOGIE WOOGIE WOOGIE" This is canon because I said so.

-I headcanon both Karasuma and Irina as aroace just in different directions. Karasuma does not want a relationship, romantic or sexual, and just wants to live life as simply a tired dad to his assassin children. Irina also doesn't want a relationship, she just uses that to seduce everyone and she doesn't have to worry about catching feelings.

-The vibe I get from Irina trying to seduce Kurasama is the vibe I get from Teruhashi and Saiki. Only obsessed because he won't pay attention when everyone else pays too much attention, then develops feelings for who they are.

-I think my favorite part is how much almost everyone's heart is in the right place. And how everyone comes in with this clear-cut mission and goal and Korosensei just kind of...teachers them into being compassionate and letting loose. Karma. Ritsu. Karasuma, Irina. Almost anyone.

-Have I mentioned how batshit insane it is for the government to be like yes. We can't kill this unkillable creature that blew up the moon. How about we let him teach a class of middle schoolers, since he's gonna kill us all anyway. Absolute madlads.

-Yes I know the reason, no it doesn't stop it from being insane. And the government just has anti-sensei material to just provide for whoever the fuck wants it.

-Takaoka. Fuck that guy. Mostly because he reminds me uncomfortably of my father. Don't like that, not one bit. This man woke up and chose unbridled rage. Sir this is a Wendy's. Please chill.

-Oooooh Nagisa shaping up to be a whole ass assassin and everyone being like holy fuck lil dude dangerous as all fuck

-Karma not knowing since he skipped out

-I love their continued casual attempts at murder. "Hey no murder in the classroom till break time" students: *sigh* fine you're no fun

-I also love how hyped Korosensei is about being assassinated. Like whole ass giving them pointers.

-Plus his little quirks. Is he going to blow up the Earth and kill everyone? Oh yeah definitely. But infect his darling student's minds with the knowledge that he reads porn mags? are you insane? what kind of teacher-

-Really hating principal bitchface. Like I know that's his character but WOW setting up a class to fail with poor facilities and then making the laughing stock of the school on PURPOSE? That's messed up.

-I mentioned this earlier but Karasuma and Irina coming to be assassins and then just worrying about the kids and their future is everything. Is them being parental figures a tag? it should be

-I have FEELINGS about the howmany-part season finale (i lost count I actually have been studying in between letting this show consume me)

-Their plan was fuckin genius it should've worked and it WOULD'VE if Korosensei wasn't a little shit

-When they got sick I was like oh shit

See the full post

112 notes • Posted 2021-11-30 10:52:02 GMT

#2

On Rick Riordan Criticism

Okay so a couple months back I heard about people hating on Rick. Honestly I just kind of dismissed it because I thought he did good on representation and was only reading the Trials of Apollo at the time. 

Then I read the Tyrant’s Tomb (sue me I didn’t read it earlier high school has been a bitch). When I saw Arabic script on those pages, I literally had to fight myself to not skip the paragraphs before that and try to read it. I failed. I read the word. I was confused. It didn’t make any sense? The letters were disjointed and didn’t spell out anything I could understand. So I went back and read the paragraph hoping for context. None. I went and read the word backwards and only THEN did I find out it was meant to say Alexandria. 

Rick, why? Why write it like that? Was Google Translate beyond you? I started to look back. I remembered reading Magnus Chase and meeting Samirah. I was super excited to see a HIJABI character. A MUSLIM character. I read about her arranged marriage to Amir. Okay, cool. My parents were an arranged marriage. 

Betrothed? I’m from India, and I live in a Muslim country, but I’d never really heard about betrothal before. It made me pause but I just kind of moved past it. Samirah was Iraqi-American right? Maybe Iraq had different a culture. Maybe it was a Shia Muslim thing? I wasn’t looking to get into that drama so I left it.

I thought back to Blood of Olympus. I was kind of uncomfortable with Frazel’s age gap and Piper’s sexualisation in her claiming. I didn’t completely understand it but I remember being slightly uncomfortable but moving past it. After all it was only 3 years right? My parents were 5 years apart. Why did it matter? And Western media is no stranger to sexualizing people, maybe I was just being a prude. Piper singing Summertime instead of a Traditional Cherokee song to charm the king of snakes disappointed me too. I was excited to see how Rick would portray her voice singing a song that belonged to an ancient culture. 

But we didn’t get that.

I read those books in middle school. When I could understand the need for representation but not understand what representation was good and what was harmful, regardless of intent. I was young. I thought Nico’s forced coming out was amazing and cool. It wasn’t. It was traumatic. I identify as Sapphic and being forced to come out to someone when you thought they wouldn’t accept you is beyond terrifying.

I’m older, I’m more aware. We don’t just need representation. We need GOOD representation. What’s wrong with the things I pointed out above? 

Children shouldn’t be getting betrothed. Especially not that young. 

Frazel’s age gap shouldn’t be that big. A year at most, not three. My parents may be 5 years part but guess what? They were adults. Hazel Lavesque is THIRTEEN. She’s barely a teenager. She doesn’t need to worry about relationships at that age. Literally every other character was in their mid-teens when they started dating. Including Frank, who is the other half of that ship. 

Piper is already disconnected from her heritage and is written with racist stereotypes, however unintentional they may be. This was literally building up to her showing some pride in her culture but no. 

There are so many characters that have been portrayed wrong or with harmful stereotypes. Mr. Riordan, you are a famous author. You can afford to hire a person of that community to come and read your books to make sure you aren’t perpetuating stereotypes. Instead you choose to give non-apologies and continue to do less than the bare minimum to learn about the cultures you write about. 

Look, I’m not going to pretend I can be a voice to a whole community. I was born in a country of brown people, I moved to a country of brown people, and my whole life I’ve had my religion respected and my race was never an issue. I was sheltered for the longest time. I can’t pretend to understand the kind of discrimination and other struggles other brown people, other muslim people, have had to face in more western countries simply for existing. The only thing I can do is call attention to discrimination and racism where I see it and try to help. I can call people out on it and learn more about other cultures to be a better ally to people who have it harder than me. 

I strongly encourage everyone that reads this post to check out the tag rr crit, and educate yourselves on what he got wrong and how he can do better. Fans that continue to say he’s not racist can talk to me in the asks or DM me

119 notes • Posted 2021-03-06 06:31:35 GMT

#1

Still thinking about how we should've gotten Percy and Annabeth acting as the 7's older siblings/parent friends instead of...whatever their dynamic in HoO was.

It would make so much more sense too because Percy and Annabeth are around 17 to the other's 13-16. Plus, we know that Percy is pretty bitter about the Gods for being deadbeat parents and all the other shit they pull including but not limited to letting their children fight wars.

So like Percy being proud of Jason for being such a good leader and stuff but being low-key bitter because he literally spent his whole life training himself to be a leader and warrior just because he's Jupiter's on.

Jason being a little jealous of Percy because he's older and he's cool and got the preatorship in like a month where he had to work for it. But also him finally learning to relax because now he doesn't need to be the leader. He could still give relevant input without being expected to have all the answers. None of that alpha male "I should lead this team" bullshit

Leo and Piper having someone to confide in about knowing their heritage for just a few months before being thrust into the biggest prophecy in a century. For that matter Hazel and Frank too but with gaining confidence in their powers.

Percy and Annabeth being protective of these kids because by gods they're just KIDS. And yeah Percy and Annabeth are technically still kids too but, at least they had support systems. No one else within the 7 had anyone they could truly confide in without fearing that they'd disappoint someone until these two came along.

Rick seems to have forgotten how age gaps work in teenagers but they're important. The teens are a formative period of life because of huge changes within surroundings and yourself. As people, teens grow incredibly fast. Even someone 2 years older than them is at a way different place in life. Annabeth and Percy would definitely see Hazel and Frank's crushes and shut that down real quick because he's 3 years older than her and it's not appropriate.

After Percy and Annabeth fall into Tartarus (it should've been Jason and Piper but whatever), Jason tries to take the reigns but they suffer some type of loss and he realizes they're all his equals and he needs to play as a member of the team and not just the leader. There is no Nico bashing because he is also a kid and I won't stand for it

I had a point and it has devolved into my personal headcanon but feel free to add on to it

246 notes • Posted 2021-08-28 05:51:45 GMT

Get your Tumblr 2021 Year in Review →

[noircartoons]

i tried to push myself to talk to my mom about my feelings cause she isnt a mind reader, and god it was hard(but because of me, she was actually very patient and stood quiet so i could talk). I ended up explaining that it can be hard to vent because i'm always so used to just running away and feeling like i'm wasting people's time, which even though it wasn't what i wanted to talk about, it still was progress in talking about my feelings, so i'm very pround!

[lotusmi]

I don't want to seem like a sob story. But to just rant. I always felt different, plus my autism made that difficult. I grew up being sexually, emotionally, and psychically abused my entire life. And into my adult years. I couldn't go to college because I developed POTS at 17 from too much fight or flight responses. I was bedridden for 3 years and had to relearn how to walk. I'm disabled and recently while my mom was out of the country on vacation, my stepdad went into psychosis and left me alone at home for a week with no food. I dealt with him screaming at me all the time everyday and spent the past 5 years trying to shift. After that experience I made a wr for the Maldives to relax because of constant stress. Then I made it a group wr with my shifting friends. The past few months I got into the void state after experiencing extreme cold weather from no heat like when we were homeless when I was a teenager. My stepdad was depressed and telling us it was our last day on Christmas. He ruined my Christmas and I found my ducks dead from the weather. He went to the psychiatric ward for 1 month and then got covid. He came back and was yelling and bullying me again. I ended up covering my ears having a panic attack, feeling like I needed a way out. I started affirming out loud that I only manifest positive things. And he's been nice since then and apologized. I have been doing affirmations for self concept to help me with the void. A few times I've felt pressure on my ears and sound would be muffled when trying to tap into the void. Recently I intended to go into a trance and listened to Lotus Mi's supernova video. I felt calm and in a trancelike state. I saw the pink of my void even with my eyes open. But then I got itchy and it all went away when I moved. I'm hoping so much to tap into the void, change things, help my friends with their situations, and go on my shifting journey. I do not intend for this to take anymore years. Though I haven't been able to get back into that trance, so I'm doing self concept affirmations again.

You are so strong, you are a beautiful soul. You deserve all the better things in world and I am so happy you found the law. I am so pround of you, you are doing amazing. Just keep doing the things you want and love within. Everything is good now, you are safe. You now can dictate what you want your life to be, you are free. Isn't wonderful? 💕 i wish you all the success!

[a-pretty-nerd]

The Comic: Chapter 3

Concept: The young Jester of your father's court has always been a constant sound in the background. But suddenly he is leaving the shadows and is tossing himself into your spotlight. What is this strange feeling??

A/N: Highkey, love writing this series. Love this idea which has been made into a novel before and I read it. It was...not good. So I decided to put my own spin on it and even thought litterally only 3 people care about this, I'm having fun. So *blows raspberry*. This is honestly apart of my mental self care because its something I enjoy and makes me happy and I encourage other writing blogs to do the same. If you have any requests, don't be afraid to ask and I love to hear feedback from you guys, it means a lot!✌❤

Warnings: NSFW, gore, violence, and smut???

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

The image of that girl kept you up for the rest of the night. The ball has come to a quick end once the devil's daughter was taken away. The acceptance of your strange gift from Lord Lincoln put a bitter taste in everyone's mouth. Including your own.

What were you thinking? Accepting something so, outrageous and possibly dangerous. Could you make him take it back? No, no you couldn't. And what did this mean for you arrangement? Did this mean you were obligated to marry Lincoln of the Grounder Empire? But there was peace between your people for now, it would make much more sense to marry Prince Bellamy and secure a relationship with the Arch Kingdom. But if you rejected Lincoln, would that mean the start of another war? And if you refused Bellamy would that ignite a war between your two kingdoms.

You tossed and turned all night, your head filled with a million different things. A million worries, troubles, thoughts, feelings, it drove you mad. And yet above it all the image of that poor girl stuck the most. It gave you nightmares in what little sleep you got. Eventually, your aching bones allowed you to get up from your bed and shuffle across your chamber room floor.

It was torturing you. You had to see her again, had to look at her up close. She couldn't have been real. And yet you remember the sight of her made your heart pround and your stomach turn. You had to see her again.

So you wrapped yourself in a robe, and with nothing but a candle light, you crept down from the tower and deep down into the dungen. Two gaurds which sat at the dungen doors seemed to pay you no attention. Upon clooser inspection, you found them asleep. How convenient, you thought.

You entered through a large gate with ease and found the faceless figure of the girl as she sat on the dirt floor. Beyond the bars she was put behind,were more walls of cages and bars that kept most prisoners. Enemies of your father and petty theives, murderers, etc. You'd never been down here before. The intensesity of the horrid place was enough to make you run back to saftey. And yet once you found her, you hid and couldnt stop watching her.

She leaned her head against the wall, her head unable to reach the wall due to the hunch of her back. The poor thing gave a sad sigh before she liftes her hands and brushed aside the hair from her face. Two sparkling green eyes and rosey cheeks shattered every expectation. Her face was beautiful by any standard, but her gentle eyes were filled with sadness. As she relaxed, she reached down to her feet. She took her anckle in one hand, and held the hoove with the other. And with a gentle pull, the hoove and a part of her "ankle" popped off. The prosthetic revealed the truth. She simply had no feet. You relaxed for just a moment. She was no demon.

"Are you lost, princess?" A voice growled behind you. You let out a sharp gasp as you turned to find Jasper standing right behind you, too close for comfort. His eyes dark and glaring into yours. He was angry.

"Jester!" You gasped.

"You shouldn't have come here, you were a fool to venture so far from your room."

"I just- I couldn't-" unable to finish a sentence, your heart racing in your chest and head, you stepped away to escape. Jasper reached out and grasped yoir wrist to pull you back. His fist turned around your flesh and it stung wildly, forcing a grunt of pain from your lips. He pulled you back to him forcefully. You'd never seen him so vicious or angry before. It scared you.

"Now you've seen her up close, you've seen the truth. You've seen what becomes of people like her! You've seen what monarchs like YOU do to people like US." He shouted.

"Jester, please." You begged and pulled away from him. He reached out and pulled your other wrist in his other hand to keep you even closer.

"You will call me by my name! As you will know her's! Look at her!" He hooked his around around your waist and turned your back to him. He forced you to look at the poor girl as she stared up in confusion and fear. "Her name is Elizabeth! She was left alone after your damn council convicted her mother of being a witch where she was burned by the stake. She has been struggling to survive till that damn Empire found her in a traveling circus." He hissed in your ear through gritted teeth.

"Let me go." You growled. "You could be executed for this."

"We are all damned to an empty fate so long as your kind is alive." He breathed in your ear.

"Let go of me...Jasper..." You stated firmly with a shaking voice. He took a few deep, heavy breaths before his grip lightened. You looked to Elizabeth, who stared up at you with a pleeing gaze. Once Jasper let you go, you booked it out of there.

You ran, and ran, and ran all the way back to your room. Your chest heaving, your mouth dry from panting, your heart aching in fear and pain. Your quickly reached your chamber room door, and slammed it shut behind you. You didn't sleep for the rest of the night.

Why did he touch you that way? He knew the risk, he knew you could report to your father and have Jasper killed. You should. But you wouldn't. You couldn't. No matter how wrong it was, no matter how much it hurt to have him yell at you like that. It didn’t mean it was right for him to do so, but he had a point. And the way he pressed you against his chest, the way he...held you. It made you shake. You were unsure of exactly what this feeling was, but it made your head spin and it drove you wild.

You had fantasies of Jasper before. You called him a pest and tried to counter act as best you could. But your feelings for him persisted and refused to leave. Even after his rage towards you. Especially after. You were seeing a different side of him, a new one, a real one.

The next morning, Abby found you sat quiet and ready to be dressed. It unerved her to say the least that you were so prepared and so soft spoken that morning. It was completely and totally out of character.

"Good morning, princess." She addressed you, awkwardly and unsure.

"Good morning, Abby." You looked up at her with an emotionless gaze. It made her uneasy.

"Are you feeling alright?" She asked as she brushed your hair and helped you dress. You shifted for a moment in thought.

"Just, tired." You admitted.

"I see. Just don't let your gaurd down." She told you as looked back over your dress to ensure you were presentable. You could have used that advice a little sooner.

The guests of the ball had stayed. They would stay for three days, and by the end, you were expected to pick a suitor. This was a rule set by your father. This was the first day of three. This day was filled with entertainment, shows by Jasper, Monty, Murphy. Competitions between nobel men of sword fighting, arrows, axes, ridiculous displays of strength. All of which Bellamy and Lincoln participated in, in hopes of catching your attention and for their own egos. But your attention was not on them, they were on Jasper. Who had decided it was a good idea to flirt and tease Princess Octavia. She appeared to have no interest in him, and even scolded him at one point. It made you smile a little.

You were to spend time with your suitors, chaperoned of course. And so you took walks with them about the royal garden with poor Monty picking at his lute behind. It all felt very awkward. Your conversations were boring and mundane to say the least. Though, Bellamy had been a slight bit more entertaining than Lincoln. Your decision though would still be based on political action. This was your one and only political contribution, and you were lucky your father was allowing you to choose.

After it all, you finally managed to sneak away and be alone in a small chamber that was often used as a study. You leaned against a desk and took a sigh of relief. Until the door behind you opened and closed. You assumed it to be Harper, or Clarke.

"Please, give me one moment of peace, for the love of god." You spoke as you turned, and froze. "Jester."

"We're alone, princess, you can call me Jasper."

"Jasper, you shouldn't be here."

"I could say the same to you."

"If we are found alone-"

"We won't." He reassured. His eyes didn't look at you. He held his head down, as if sad or in shame. "I came to, apologize." He stated shyly.

"There is no need, Jasper I-" you went to move to escape the room, but he stood in front of the door.

"Please. Let me explain myself."

"You don't have to, I understand." You reasoned.

"No, you don't. I am so deeply sorry for what I said, for what I did to you last night. I practically bruised your wrists!" He gently reached out and let his fingers brushed against your wrists. You threw your hands away. "Please princess, I never meant to hurt you. I was so angry. That poor girl." He trailed off.

"I forgive you, Jasper. I understand your anger and your hatred. Now please, move aside."

"That isn't all I have to say. Before you go to your father, before I am killed, I have more to say to you." He looked at you with pleading eyes. "Princess, I fear that I may never get the chance to tell you this again. I thought I had more time, but I now realize you will soon be gone for good. It breaks my heart to know that I may never see you again." He slowly reached his hand out again, and took yours. Gently and tenderly. You started to shake. He lifted your hand to his lips and left a soft kiss. "I have loved you since I first layed eyes on you."

"Jasper."

"You have haunted me ever since, and knowing I would never be able to have you has broken my heart. But the notion that you will no longer have a place in my life shatters my very soul. I live to make you smile and to hear your laugh. I wanted you to know this before it is too late." He looked up from your hand, back to you. His deep brown eyes, filled with tears now. You fell frozen, you didn't know what to do. "I know your hatred for me, and I know-"

"I don't hate you." You spoke up. He let your hand down from his face, and you held it back. "I've never hated you." You admitted. You never truly did, he found him annoying at times but...your mutual love for him was always there. His eyes filled with hope. His chest heaved as he looked into your eyes, waiting for you pulk away. When you didn't, he moved quickly and suddenly. For the first time, you felt lips against your own as he kissed you. It was so soft, so sweet. It sent a chill down your spine. He wrapped his arms around you as you placed your hads on his chest. You kissed him back and be held you close in a moment of pure passion and desperation for one another.

"Princess, I-"

"My name is not Princess, Jasper." You whispered.

"I love you, Y/N."

"I love you, Jasper." You told him. He let out a soft chuckle of happiness and smiled. Tears would have fallen for it not for another kiss. A passionate and heated kiss that made your blood boil. You wanted him closer. You felt more and more desperate for him as he leaned down and kissed your neck and whatever exposed flesh be could. You let out whimpers and moans in response. You let out an especially loud one when Jasper's hands started to wonder your clothed body.

"Are you alright?" He asked, concerned. You nodded, your cheeks hot and red. "Oh sweet princess, you've never been touched before, have you?" You shook your head. "Forgive me, I'll be gentle." He whispered before kissing you again. You felt so dizzy and yet so grounded at the same time. Before you knew it, you were pressed up against a desk. Jasper's hands hiking up the skirt of your dress and pulling down the shorts underneath. You wanted this so badly. You wanted him. Needed him. And he needed you.

"Jasper" you moaned as he kissed your neck. He gave a smile and huff as he held you close to him.

"You have no idea how long I've wanted you like this." He whispered into your neck. His hand went down to caress your thighs. And then suddenly you felt his touch. You let out a sharp gasp in surprise as he started to play with you. No one else had ever touched you before, no one but yourself. He made you moan into his lips as he kissed you passionately. You took your hand in his, and guided you down to his cock. He moaned and twitched under your touch as you stroked him. You drove him wild.

Jasper held you close to him by your waist as he pressed himself against you, positioning himself st your entrance. You could feel your heart racing in your chest and the adrenaline pumping through your veins. You let out a harsh gasp as he pressed forward and slid into you. He held you so close and so tight, it was comforting in that moment. You felt pain at first, sharp and stunning. Until it became dull. He started to move and something switched inside your head. You became a mess. You were vulnerable and weak, you were his and his alone. A moment so intimate and pure in that moment. You'd never felt anything like it.

He grunted and moaned as he bucked his hips into yours, he cling to you as he made love to you. Making sure you felt pleasure instead of just pain. Before you knew it, he had reached his high and began twitching and moaning your name helplessly. You held onto him as you felt him cum inside you. You may not have reached a climax as he did but, you felt a calming and pleasent sensation that ran throughout your body. It made you smile as you kissed him. He panted for a moment before kissing your all over and holding you close still.

"Oh Y/N," he panted, "you are an angel." He rested he head on your chest and held you there for a moment. "It is every man's dream to have you like this." He cooed. "I can die a happy man knowing you have loved me."

"Please don't talk about death anymore." You asked him as you ran your hands through his hair lovingly.

"You better go back to the festivities before anyone notices you are gone."

"We both should."

"Not together."

"No. Not together" You nodded. You fixed yourselves, though you didn't expect yourself to be so weak after. Your head spun and your legs were wobbly. Before you left the room, Jasper grabbed you by your arm and planted yet another passionate kiss on your lips. Oh what a rush that gave you.

"Good luck out there, princess."

"You too, Jester."

[chocobostrinket]

Friendly anon here. Wait... i'm not a anon anymore D: . I need a new nickname... But forget this right now. I'm here for headcanon! How about Noctis and Prompto with a s/o who is strong enough to win arm wrestling against daddy gladdy. How would they react ~

ITS YOOOOOUUUU. BUT NOT AS AN ANON. Hey there! :D Ended up turning into’s it’s usual kerfuffle of headcanons and scenarios mixed together. Whoops!

Noctis:

It would happen when they’re killing time in the training room. All three would be sprawled out on the floor relaxing after a session. 

He’d listen to Gladio and his S/O’s conversation with an amused expression on his face. They’d both be bragging of their respective strength. 

Noctis would know that they’re strong, and that they could probably kick his ass if they really wanted to. But that wouldn’t stop him from worrying when the two’s bragging becomes a competition.

They both would be sizing each other up, and the poor prince would worry. He’d seen that look on both their faces before, and very rarely did things turn out alright after it. 

Gladio would be the one to suggest the arm wrestling match, because of course he would. Noctis would try to discourage them from agreeing because LOOK AT THE SIZE OF HIS ARMS. 

...Needless to say, that backfires and they agree. Noctis would shake his head and just brace for whatever’s about to happen. 

They rope him in to be the ref though, and he agrees back this was seriously going to be interesting. Even if it’s a bad idea. 

Gladio would find a small table and a pair of chairs for them to use, and they both would take their place. Noctis would count them off.

Three...two...one...Go!

It’d only last a few moments. They’d mostly be resisting Gladio’s pressure at first, and at the first sign of their arm tilting backwards, Gladio would grin. 

HOWEVER. Gladio is very taken off guard when they suddenly twist their wrist, and lock it. And they’d suddenly light up with an evil grin and he’d knows he’s screwed. 

They suddenly pour all their strength into the battle, going from 0 to 100 in a blink of an eye. And not only would they force Gladio’s hand down, the table’s such a delicate thing it gives and suddenly Gladio HIMSELF is thrown to the floor.

“OOPS.”

It would be very dramatic scene, especially with the table collapsing like it did. 

And poor Noctis would be shocked. Like, jaw dragging on the floor, wide eyed, shocked. He’d need a moment to register what just happened....But that’s when the laughter would begin. 

It would start by a small laugh bubbling out of him, followed by him looking at the situation again and then he just can stop. He’s in stitches. His S/O looks almost too pleased with themself as they help Gladio to his feet. Gladio is shaking his head and smiling. 

They’d wander over to Noctis, would would drape his arms around their shoulders. “That was priceless!”

He’d press a kiss to their cheek and chuckle as Gladio leaves for the day. And then they’d lean their arm on his shoulder.

“You want to try a round Noctis?” They’d tease, and he’d of course, say no, but smile all the same. 

Prompto:

Going drinking with this pair is NEVER a good idea, but they’d end up tagging along to watch out for Prompto. 

Which, it’s a surprisingly pleasant time. They’re all a little tipsy(maybe...), but nothing unmanageable. (Not like last time. How Prompto even remembers how out of hand they all got is a miracle.)

Though things quickly go south when Gladio gets challenged to an arm wrestling match in the bar they’re in, wins, and gets a drink as a prize. 

This leads to a whole CHAIN of people lining up to have a go at him. Which leads to more winning. And more drinks. And him getting more and more tipsy.

The couple would try and convince him it was enough, which leads to him very loudly challenging them both as well.

Prompto and his S/O would look at each other, and shrug. Mind as well give it a go right? He’d never agree to this while sober. 

(Prompto worries a bit because his S/O is always in baggy sweaters. And looks like a strong breeze could steal them away. But who’s he to deny them right?)

Prompto goes first and winds up with a bruise on the back of his hand. 

He admits defeat and goes back over to his S/O after getting Gladio his drink. 

His S/O then glowers at Gladio. They take off their sweater so they’re in their tank top with a bit more freedom to move, roll their shoulders, and swear that they hear Prompto behind them somewhere squeak.

(HOW DID HE NOT KNOW THEY WERE SO ATHLETIC UNDER THEIR SWEATER?!)

They sit down across from Gladio and smile sweetly. He makes a crack about their size and worries he’ll break them. They keep grinning and offer their hand and a deal. “I win, we all go home to sleep this off.” 

He agrees, takes it, and signs his death warrant. 

They furiously push against each other. (Prompto doesn’t admit it until later, but he took a BUNCH of pictures to remember this by. Because god damn. Look at those muscles.) 

Prompto’s S/O then grimaces and forces Gladio’s arm down slowly, tick by tick until....

His hand touches down. And his S/O Stands up and does a small victory dance. Prompto is so damn pround that they took down the giant that he rushes over to them and picks them up while spinning around. 

Gladio ends up laughing and nearly drops off into sleep where he’s sitting. They get him up and out the door, Prompto teasing them about how he didn’t know they worked out.

The next day, Gladio and Prompto’s s/o don’t remember what happened. But Prompto does and makes it a point to cuddle close to them so he can feel their arms around him too. 

(Bonus headcanon: Prompto doesn’t actually drink. All his drinks were nonalcoholic. He honestly just tags along for drinks with Gladio for fun. Which is also how he remembers everything the next day.) 

[lotusmi]

hello lotus! i'm the anon from this ask! to make it easier, can i be 🥟 anon?

first of all, i saw your pinned post. i haven't been keeping up with tumblr at all and it makes me really sad to see. but i'm proud that you're doing what's best for you and i respect your decision always, and i hope you enjoy your break and rest lots.

second of all, my mindset has been really improving a lot lately. i've been doing @uniquelymeandmyworld2 challenge for a week, listening to your subs and affirmation tapes overnight and during the day! i play meditations before i sleep and it helps me relax a lot and things and it's been really good. i try to affirm throughout the day but with work and having to concentrate on that and driving, i forgive myself for not being able to do that haha. although, later in the week, i didn't want to force myself and let it be natural, i didn't force myself to put it on if i didn't feel like it, and that kind of flow is really important.

i've made two friends who really boost my self-esteem. i had been really lonely because my best friend can't contact me much due to her circumstances and i'm in a suffocating environment as well, but i've been changing the way i think kind of. but thanks to them i'm becoming more aware of my thoughts and how i treat myself and talk to myself in my thoughts and it's really changed a lot. they appreciate me a lot and they and my other friends i've made online want me around and sometimes fight over who i'm joining for the night's games and it almost feels too good to be true because of how much more hopeful and happier i became in such a short span of time. i've become more proud of myself, more respectful towards myself and treating myself with self-respect and speaking more of my truth even if it's small, not getting stuck or obsessing on the small things or even on the big things because i have a goal in mind, i have a me i already am right here inside me.

like i feel like i deserve it and after years, it feels like any moment i can wake up home where i know i belong. even though i know waking up there will mean leaving this old reality behind and those friends that i'm grateful for too, i'm still positive and i know this is for me without any doubt, and to have rock solid belief like that...i mean, of course, it's built on my years of trying and believing and all that, but also with the decision i made to change and do what i can...i don't know how to describe it, it's really good, it feels right, it feels natural, like i was always meant to feel this good and that it'll last forever. a feeling that feels fleeting, but it feels like i'll fly away with it home if that makes any sense.

thank you both for giving me the courage to keep trying again, thank you to @voidsuccess for posting stories that make me remember i can do it too, because i know my dream is already here now. i can't wait to experience it ♥

Oh, darling.. this is so beautiful. You are so lovely, you deserve the best. I am so pround of you, i am prounnd you forgave yourself and you are doing better everyday. I am so happy you feel like doing everything right this time and that your are creating your dream life! You will enter so soon and I'll be so happy for you. I wish you the best! 💗