#I also imagine Stiles having a panic attack and Derek laying his head on Stiles' chest like a therapy dog

[noyzinerd]

Derek the Doggo

Now, I've read a few Sterek AU fics where Derek has to pretend he's a dog/wolf and gets adopted by Stiles, who is none the wiser. Stiles usually talks to his "pet" in these as if he were talking to a person.

That's nice and all, but can someone PLEASE give me a Stiles that speaks to fully-shifted wolf Derek like a tumblr millennial raised on the internet? Like the single, poorly socialized, unhinged, expending-waaaay-too-much-energy-into-his-"fur-baby" dog-mom I know he'd be?

Like, Stiles holding up a mirror up to Derek and going "It you!"

Or, when Derek lays belly-up, paws to the ceiling, and stretches his toes wide, Stiles says sagely, "Ah, yes.The beans are coming in nicely this year."

Or Stiles putting Derek in a hotdog costume.

Or decorating his entire place with balloons and streamers and ordering an elaborate, dog-safe cake made of peanut butter and Milkbones to celebrate their one-month-iversary since the adoption.

Stiles hiring a professional baby photographer for a photoshoot.

Stiles setting up a Zoom call for Derek with another friend's dog, in which, Derek just sits there, looking awkwardly between Stiles and the other dog like "What exactly am I supposed to do here?", because he's a full grown man expected to have a "conversation" over videochat with a dog like they're supposed to bark back and forth about the weather or park recommendations or something.

Stiles making Derek a Twitter account and constantly posting as him in doggo speak (which he reads out loud, in a voice he imagines Derek would have, as he types). Like "Henlo! I is heckin good boi derk! Big anger! Much grump!" Or "No bork. Only O\m/O". Or "Mmmm hooman shoes omnomnomnom 😋"

And when Derek tears into things or misbehaves in an attempt to upset Stiles, he's just met with a psuedo-stern "Wuh-oh. Looks like Hurricane Derek strikes again. I hereby sentence you to 3 hours of cruel and unusual punishment!" Before being put in a cone of shame.

Bonus points if, after Derek shifts back, it turns out Stiles already knew he was a werewolf (maybe not the whole time, but definitely early on). He just wanted to see how far he could push things until the mysterious werewolf he had adopted finally showed himself and revealed whatever he was planning.

(If there is, by miracles of miracles, already a fic like this, recs would by greatly appreciated!)

[fanficimagery]

Imagine being Scott's sister and falling in love with Theo. In a fight with an encroaching Pack, you get severely injured. Can Scott be persuaded to give you the bite or will he let the past repeat itself?

Theo X Reader

Falling for Theo had been the last thing you'd expected to ever happen. When he'd returned to Beacon Hills just in the nick of time to help out your brother when the Dread Doctors first released one of their experiments, you'd been grateful. You didn't care that he had claws, fangs, and yellow eyes. In fact, you didn't care about his cocky attitude and instead found it rather attractive at times.

But you did start to care that it seemed he was pitting Scott's pack against their alpha and that didn't sit well with you. Theo had become an actual monster and you were heartbroken when it came out that he was working with the Dread Doctors to bring down your brother and resurrect The Beast of Gevaudan. While the pack either gloated or were speechless about Theo's betrayal, it was Scott who comforted you because he knew you and Theo were once close before the Raeken's had moved away. Then Theo disappeared which was good for Stiles' peace of mind, but there was a part of you that was sad all over again.

Ghost Riders came into the picture soon after and wreaked havoc on your hometown, kidnapping locals left and right (though no one knew anyone went missing because everyone's memories were being altered), and Theo was suddenly back. Only this time, Theo was a lesser version of himself and it seemed wherever he was did a number on him because he was terrified of going back. And when no one wanted anything to do with him, you found yourself with a shadow as Theo took to dogging your footsteps and catching up on all that he’d missed.

It was then everyone saw a different side to Theo, he doing his best to earn everyone's trust and even sacrificing himself to the Ghost Riders when they'd cornered him and Liam. His newfound loyalty to the Pack and Beacon Hills did a lot to appease Scott somewhat, and it even got your brother off your back about all the times Theo had hung out at your house.

Then something terrible came, exposing the supernatural side of Beacon Hills to the humans and instilling fear into them all. War broke out between hunters and supernatural beings, and the humans who were in contact with supernatural beings got caught in the middle. Fighting humans was a lot different than defending yourself against a supernatural being, and you were grateful Theo stuck close to help you out when your fellow students started targeting you because of your connection to Scott.

Not a single member of the pack trusted Theo as far as they could throw him, and you completely understood their opinions, but you warmed completely when he stayed to help Mason in the underground tunnels and when he found it in himself to finally take someone's pain away as they were dying. Theo was completely changed after that and though you offered to forgive him for his past deeds, you also mentioned you'd never forget.

Several months down the line, it was Theo who made it his mission to completely win you over. And when he eventually did several more months later, you were at a complete loss when he kissed you and confessed his feelings. He left the ball completely in your court and against almost everyone's wishes, you agreed to date him.

Having gotten home from a day of classes down at the community college, you're excited to see Theo in your home and working online to obtain his GED while your mom cleaned house on her day off. It was good to see she had finally warmed up to your boyfriend after seeing Scott give his blessing on your relationship, and it never failed to amuse you when you remembered how she threatened Theo should he go back to his murderous ways.

As you pass your mom in the hallway, the two of you greet each other with kisses to the cheek. She tucks your hair behind your ear before letting you pass and then you lean over the back of the couch, pressing a kiss to Theo's cheek and then his mouth when he turns to glance over his shoulder.

"Hey. Long day?" He asks.

Rounding the couch, you plop down on the end opposite of him and toe off your shoes. "Yeah. I just want to eat and sleep."

"Sorry," he says, shutting his laptop and setting it on the coffee table. "Scott called. Something is testing our borders, so the Pack is coming home for the weekend. Your brother should be here in a little bit."

"No," you whine. "We just got rid of the pixies last week. Why can't we just chill for a month or so?"

Chuckling, Theo grins. "It's Beacon Hills." Then reaching out towards you, he grabs you by the wrist and tugs you down so your head is in his lap. "Nap. I'll wake you when he gets here."

"You better." Accepting a chaste kiss from him one more time, you then settle down and do as you were told.

     - X - X - X - X - X -

Groggily waking up, it takes you several seconds to realize you're in your bedroom. As Theo lays on his back, he has you tucked up right next him with your head on his shoulder and your right leg thrown over his thighs.

Moaning softly, you arch up into him. "What happened? I thought Scott wanted to talk?"

"S'fine," Theo murmurs. "Your mom told him how tired you've been and he promised we'll talk tomorrow."

"'Kay. Anything I miss?"

"Hmmm. Stiles got in early. He still hates me."

You smile. "Of course he does. Anything else?"

"Your mom officially knows I've been sneaking in through your window." At that, your eyes fly wide open and Theo shakes with suppressed laughter. "Don't worry. After a very humiliating talk with her, she knows we take every precaution available and told me to use the stairs from now on."

"Oh my god. She's never going to let me live this down. Liam's never going to let us live this down!"

"Worth it," he mumbles. "We don't have to sneak around anymore. Now get some sleep. Everyone should be here by tomorrow afternoon."

"Yay," you deadpan.

The pack reunion was well underway at your house. Everyone but Stiles had a warm greeting for you, but in all honestly Stiles was more your twin's friend than yours. Derek and Cora's return had surprised you, but after Scott's quick explanation of an encroaching Pack, the Hale back-up made sense.

Once word got out about the cleansed nemeton, it seemed like every supernatural entity wanted to taste it's power. But everyone who came through dealt with the McCall Pack and they were usually sent on their way soon after. This time though, the Pack was scattered and a nearby pack had just gotten word that Beacon Hills wasn't as protected as everyone once thought.

"So what do we do?" Liam asks. "Hayden, Mason, and I are finishing up our last year of school. We have classes all day and can't patrol the borders until after four."

"I can patrol mornings and late at night," Theo pipes up, raising his hand.

Stiles scoffs. "That's comforting."

You shift uncomfortably at the tense atmosphere that follows and fortunately Sheriff Stilinski breaks it by cuffing his only son on the back of his head. After Stiles yelps, Sheriff Stilinski says, "I can leave Parrish free to patrol wherever you need him. Just let me know when and where."

Derek nods, offering up his own services, "Cora and I can stay as long as you need us, Scott."

Peter sighs. "What the hell. Count me in as well."

Smiling in relief, Scott says, "Thanks, guys."

"What about us humans?" Melissa asks.

Scott shrugs. "Just go about your day as usual. In between patrolling, the humans will be checked up on to make sure no other Were has been near."

"Well whatever their deal is, let us hope they get it out of their system over the weekend," Stiles says. "Lydia and I have to leave by Monday, and we all know we're the brains of the Pack."

Several people groan and you toss popcorn kernels at Stiles' head. "Way to jinx us, Stilinski."

As luck would have it, the encroaching Pack make their move Sunday afternoon in broad daylight. A trip to the grocery store was in order since the Pack was eating the food in your mom's cabinets and refrigerator, and no one had thought to tag along with you. So while you were loading the groceries into the trunk of your car you were caught completely off guard as a cloth was clasped over your mouth and nose, and no amount of struggling freed you from your captors. And as your world went black, your last thought was that if you made it out of this alive you were going to throat punch Stiles.

When you eventually come to it's because something sharp is digging into your neck. And when your eyes flutter open, it takes you a moment to realize the glowing eyes across the clearing are the rage filled eyes of your pack. Which means.. which means the claws at your throat are entirely unfriendly.

"Don't. Move," Theo grits out between his elongated fangs.

You immediately stop fidgeting and stand a little taller to elevate the grip on your throat since the werewolf at your back had only been holding up your unconscious form by grasping your throat. Gulping, your gaze darts to each of your pack members and you mentally forgive Stiles when you see the panic in his eyes.

"Let my sister go," Scott snarls, "and you can walk away from this."

"My dear boy," the werewolf holding you tuts. Alpha. He's definitely an alpha. "You seem to be under the impression that it is you who will win." Scott's eyes blaze red and the alpha behind you chuckles. "Go get 'em, boys."

Your stomach sinks as the enemy pack appear one right after the other, lunging from between the trees and attacking your pack. Scott and Kira fight back to back, her sword slicing through wolves with one goal in mind. Derek and Cora snarl in rage as they fight off their own wolves, and Peter seems to be protecting Stiles and Mason to the best of his abilities. Even with her wailing Lydia is no match for teeth and claws when the wolves decide to gang up on her, and Liam and Hayden do what they can to help the banshee.

"Y/N!"

Theo, with his eyes blazing yellow, starts in your direction, but the enemy wolves block him.

"Silly boy," the alpha muses. "As if he even has a chance."

Scott roaring as claws drag down his back makes you flinch and the alpha holding you chuckles. As the battle rages on, you decide to ask, "Why me?"

The alpha's chest rumbles with glee and you cringe when you feel lips brush your ear. "Because, my dear, you are the alpha's sister. Without you, he'll be so lost in grief that Beacon Hills will be easy pickings."

Realization sets in immediately and tears prick your eyes as you watch your pack fight for their lives and Beacon Hills. "You don't plan to let me live, do you?"

"It depends on your brother. All we want is the nemeton."

"Yeah? Well you can fuck right off if that's what you want." The alpha tightens his grip on your throat and you choke. Glancing for someone- anyone, really- you find Theo and Scott doubling their effort when they see you struggling for breath.

His grip loosens and you can finally pay attention to the battle once more. And this time, it seems your pack is doing more than holding their own. Scott, Theo, and Peter are the bloodiest, the three of them looking pretty terrifying as they inch closer and closer towards you.

"Too bad, little dove," the alpha drawls. "I guess our time is going to be cut short tonight."

"Wha-"

The claws dig deeper into your throat and your eyes widen in horror. Your hands uselessly scratch at the alpha's hand and your shout gets cut short as the claws are then ripped to the side, slicing through your throat with ease.

"No!" Scott roars.

The alpha whistles and then pushes you forward, and Theo rushes forward to catch you. Stumbling into your boyfriend's arms, he immediately lowers you to the ground, cradles you in his lap, and covers your neck with the palm of his hand. "Scott! Scott, what do I do?"

"I- " You choke on your blood, splattering your lips and chin with red.

"Don't. Shhh," Theo says.

"The pack's retreating. Follow them to the borders," someone shouts.

"Theo. L-Look at me," you say, gulping down mouthfuls of copper tainted saliva just to be able to speak. He looks down at you, eyes swimming with tears. "I l-love you. I need you to-"

Theo whines. "Stop. Please just- I love you too, okay? But we need to save our declarations for later."

"I don't know.. if I'll have a l-later."

"You will. You have to." Looking back up, Theo screams as you start to cough again. "Scott!"

"It's okay. It's-"

"Theo, siphon her pain." Glancing behind him, you see your brother silently crying. He's staring right at you, but it's like he doesn't even see you. He's reliving a past tragedy and you don't blame him for not immediately acting.

Suddenly the pain is a lot more bearable and you relax against your boyfriend. Meeting his gaze once more, you say, "I loved you in this life.. and I will love you in the next." Coughing, Theo loosens his grip just a little on your throat before applying pressure after the cough has passed.

"Stop talking like that. Scott will- he can bite you. You can live."

"It's 50/50. You know-"

"I don't care! It's a better option than doing nothing." Theo looks up, reaching back with his other arm and swiping at Scott's leg. "Snap out of it! Y/N needs you."

Scott seems to shake his head clear and he's quick to drop to his knees beside you. "Y/N? I don't- what do I do?"

"Bite her!"

You gulp. "Do what your gut is telling you, Scotty. I won't.. pressure you."

Tears fall from your brothers eyes, they burning red. "I never wanted this for you."

"I-I know."

"I'm sorry."

"Me.. too."

Scott hesitates for a moment before grabbing your right arm, he holding it in front of his mouth before closing his eyes. When his mouth opens wide, his teeth elongate and you cry out when he closes his mouth around your wrist. The pain is absolutely blinding and it doesn't come as a shock when everything goes dark.

     - X - X - X - X - X -

Hours later after the McCall pack has made sure the encroaching pack is long gone, everyone returns to the McCall household where they find a newly showered Scott and Theo pacing the living room. Melissa is stress cleaning the kitchen and Sheriff Stilinski is keeping an eye on her from the doorway between the kitchen and living room.

"How is she?" Lydia softly asks.

Theo shrugs and Scott sighs. "The bleeding slowed so Mom cleaned the wounds and bandaged them. She's stable. That's all we know."

"Does she smell like a wolf?" Derek asks. "It's been hours. You should be able to tell."

"I can't. She smells like that alpha since he was pressed up to her back."

A choked off whine startles everyone into silence and Theo stares at them with tear-filled eyes. "Can you guys just.. stop. I can't- I can't think about the bite not taking."

"Theo," Derek frowns. "The bite-"

"I know, okay? I know. But Y/N- if anything happens to her-" He trails off, shaking his head and pressing his lips together to keep from sobbing. "I can't lose her. I don't know if I can handle it if she doesn't make it."

A moment of silent grief takes hold of the pack and Stiles says, "She's your anchor. Isn’t she?"

Surprised that Stiles is talking to him without any hostility, Theo can only nod as the tears streak down his face.

"The- Theo?" Every supernatural being's head snaps up, staring at the ceiling at the sound of the weak voice. "Scott?"

"She's awake," Scott breathes in awe.

Then glancing at one another, Scott and Theo lunge for the stairs.

Sitting up in bed, you cringe as the tape holding the bandage to your neck pulls on your skin. Your head is pounding, and your neck and your wrist feel like it's on fire. Then slowly crawling out of bed, your feet sink into the carpet of your floor as you walk over to the mirror hanging on the back of your closet door.

Seeing your reflection, your nose wrinkles at the mess of hair sitting atop your head. The front of your shirt is soaked with blood and the bandages you're wearing had nearly been soaked through. Against your better judgement, you decide to see what's underneath the bandages.

The one on your wrist peels off easy and you frown at what appears to be a scarred over bite mark. Then glancing at your reflection once more, you work on peeling off the bandage over your neck. And beneath that lies three slash marks, still red and raw but mostly healed.

The memory of what happened jumps to the forefront of your mind and your heart starts to beat erratically. The memory of feeling terrified and horrified rushes back, and suddenly rage bubbles up. Subconsciously you bare your teeth and you slap a hand over your mouth when your eyes blaze yellow in the mirror.

"The-Theo? Scott?" You weakly utter.

One moment it's silent and the next there's thundering footsteps resonating in your ears. You cringe at the volume of it and yelp when your bedroom door is thrown open. Whirling around, you growl. Scott and Theo stare in shock, and after realizing what you did, you apologize. "I-I'm sorry. I didn't mean to-"

Scott rushes forward and throws his arms around you, he hugging you as tightly as he can. Your chest stutters with suppressed sobs and you manage to get your arms around your twin too. "The bite took."

"I-I guess," you mutter in response. "Everything is still healing."

Scott hugs you for what feels like an eternity and when he releases you, you look to Theo only to see everyone else congregated at his back. You want nothing more than to assure him you're okay and talk about those three little words the both of you spoke to one another, but then your mother is there pushing through the pack and she's sobbing with relief once her arms are around you.

Then after your mother's had her fill and has stepped aside, Theo is there. His arms are immediately around your shoulders and his face pressed to your neck. With your arms wrapped low around his back, you squeeze him as tight as you're capable of. "It's okay. I'm fine. We're fine."

"Never again," he mumbles. "You are never going anywhere alone ever again."

Chuckling through your tears, you agree. "Fine. So long as you're with me, I think it will be just fine."

"You have yourself a deal, McCall."

[boomitsbucky]

Worse Than A Tattoo. Part3

Summery: Everyone finds out.

Part 1 here.

Part 2 here.

Part 3/3

The pack took the news extremely well, all very excited even Boyd had grinned and hugged stiles so tightly that Derek growled. Scott and the girls had cried telling him how proud they were of their Alphas mate and best friend.

It took a week for everyone to get back to perfect health. Lydia still had a little bruising but she was fine other than that. Stiles had spent the last few days begging Derek to not make him tell his dad.

“Please we can tell him we adopted them or- or they’re your cousins kids and we are looking after them!”

Derek had growled at that. “You want to deny our pups?” Stiles flailed at that, “No! Never! Der I just I don’t- he won’t- he’s my dad! I’m 20! He’s already angry about me being mated for life, for being with you who’s seven years older than me! He nearly had a heart attack when he saw I had a tattoo!”

Derek pinched the bridge of his nose. “We will tell him together it will be fine. He’s going to find out anyway Stiles when they come out looking just like us.”

Stiles whimpered and hid his face in Dereks chest, the bigger the pups got the more their wolf instincts rubbed off on stiles. He was constantly scenting Derek and the pack, not that anyone minded. Derek in particular loved it, walking around smelling just like his pregnant mate.

Derek left it for a few days until Saturday evening, he had sent the pack off to their retrospective homes and told them not to come back until Tuesday. None of them had been very happy being away from stiles for that long but agreed none the less.

“Your father will be here in an hour baby, do you want to shower before he gets here?” Derek asked running his fingers over stiles bump as he lay dozing on the bed.

Nodding sleepily stiles reached out for Derek pouting. Derek smiled at how soft and pliant he was, don’t get him wrong he loved how strong, independent and sarcastic stiles was. But he also loved when he was like this, soft and sleepy. Noticing it just now he realised that stiles hadn’t been struggling with his ADHD much since he fell pregnant.

After a quick warm shower Derek dressed stiles in one of his black tshirts and some leggings that Erica had bought him when he realised he couldn’t fit in anything anymore. Slipping on stiles favourite fluffy socks with a kiss to his ankle Derek smiled seeing stiles head dropped back on the pillows snoring slightly.

Deciding not to wake him Derek covered him over with their duvet and headed down stairs. He had made stew with home made bread for dinner, his father had taught him how to make it. It was he only thing he could cook until he met stiles.

Derek heard Noah before he had even entered the preserve. His eyes glancing at the ceiling he heard stiles shifting in bed his heart beat still steady, still sleeping.

“Hey Derek” Noah smiled handing Derek a bottle of wine as he stepped in the door. “Noah” Derek nodded his head taking Noah’s coat for him hanging it up next to his own.

“It’s quiet, have you killed him.” He laughed glancing around slightly confused at the lack of his lanky hyperactive son.

“He’s sleeping he’s been tired a lot lately.” Derek hummed holding out his arm to show him to the kitchen.

“Stiles tired? Is he okay?” Noah laughed looking at his son in law as he sat on one of the island stools. Derek didn’t laugh.

Noah frowned slightly, “Derek? Is my son okay?” Derek nodded “he’s fine, he’s waking up.” He glanced at the stairs.

“He has something to tell you and it’s really making him panic. Please don’t be to hard on him, it’s going to be a shock but it’s going to be okay” Derek moved to stand by the stairs. Waiting to help stiles.

“Derek if my son comes down those stairs covered in anymore tattoos I’ll be arresting you both and charging you with one of the many crimes I’ve let you get away with.” Noah stood his heart beating fast as he waited to lay eyes on his son.

“Der are you making stew I’m hungry.” Stiles soft voice asked as he carefully waddled down the stairs. Derek took his hand gently standing in front of him. “Your dads here” he whispered pressing a kiss to his forehead before moving aside.

Leaving stiles in full sight with his father. Stiles breathing began to her shallow but Derek scented him quickly placing his hand on the small of his back.

“D-Dad I-“

“Oh this is way worse than a tattoo. Mieczyslaw Stilinski you tell me right now that, that is some kind of swelling and not what it looks like!” Noah’s voice was getting louder with every word.

Dereks fist clenched at his side, if stiles heartbeat became anymore panicked he was going to have to make Noah leave.

“Dad I’m pregnant. I’m sorry. I know you want the best for me but it’s my choice and I have Derek and we are safe now. Please don’t hate me” stiles hands were shaking as he took a step toward his father, tears spilling onto his pink cheeks.

Noah stepped forward wrapping his arms around his son tightly just holding him as he cried into his shoulder. Noah’s eyes locked with Dereks who watched intently. He couldn’t tell what emotion it was but Derek had never been so relived in his life.

“I could never hate you.” He whispered against his sons hair. “I’m not disappointed Stiles, I know you can do this. It’s very brave.” Noah said pulling back to look at him. The initial anger and shock fading away.

Derek smirked stiles was scenting his father calming him down dramatically without him noticing.

“Its twins.” Stiles let out a shaky breath wiping away his tears. The pups moving around in his stomach made him smile slightly and glance down, placing a hand over where he could feel them moving.

“Like Derek and Laura. Your mothers would be so happy.” Noah breathed gently touching Stiles stomach.

Derek smiled fondly stepping closer to them, flinching when Noah gripped his shoulder giving him a reassuring smile as they all stood in silence feeling the little movements under stiles’ skin.

—

A few months later Stiles was lay in bed with his twin daughters fast asleep on his chest. He couldn’t ever imagine feeling happier. Derek was in the bathroom running him a bath, the pack were down stairs putting together baby furniture for around the house. His dad was baby proofing every room possible and he was just there, with his daughters.

Elise Talia stilinski-Hale And Isa Claudia Stilinski-Hale. Both had Dereks colouring and dark hair but they most defiantly had stiles eyes and his endless freckles.

“So I was thinking.” Stiles called standing from the bed both girls in the crook of each arm.

Derek looked up from where he was adding bath salts to the water.

“I want another tattoo.”

[sterekshaven]

A while back we had Consent Week on @sterekdrabbles, and I wrote Ask Instead (tumblr and ao3), a drabble in which there are consent and communication issues between Stiles and Derek. I said then that I would write a continuation to it, where they talked about it. It’s taken me a little over 3 weeks to feel comfortable enough with it to post it, but here it is. Finally.

Also on ao3.

Stiles hadn’t really thought much about consent. He had made sure Derek was on board with everything, asked for enthusiastic and verbal consent those first few times, thoroughly enough that Derek had been a little annoyed with it after a while. Both Stiles and Derek initiated sex and he knew Derek said no to sex occasionally too, so it really wasn’t something he thought about. He was comfortable in the knowledge that they both wanted what they were doing, so when Derek said no to sex once for no obvious reason Stiles didn’t think much of it at first.

Derek had been reading in bed and Stiles was lonely and bored, so he went to join him. His first plan was just to join him, maybe cuddle some, maybe annoy him some, but mostly just be in the same room, maybe get his own book and read next to him. Then he saw Derek though, and his cock jumped in his pajama pants. Derek was on his stomach, wearing only underwear, and he looked. Well, like Derek. He always looked good, it was really unfair, he could be exhausted or beaten or dirty or whatever and he still looked perfect, still so incredibly gorgeous, Stiles didn’t know he’d ever get used to it.

He climbed up on the bed and crawled up on top of Derek, then he nuzzled along his back until he got to his neck.

“Hey,” he murmured as he grinded down against his ass a little, his own cock quickly stiffening up.

Derek didn’t say anything for a moment, but then he carefully asked, “Not right now?” so Stiles kissed his shoulder and rolled off him.

“Okay,” he said.

He didn’t think much of it, he just figured Derek wasn’t in the mood, which obviously was completely fine. If he didn’t want to he didn’t want to. He usually wanted to when Stiles started to climb him like that, his ass was very sensitive, but that wasn’t by any means a guarantee that he was in the mood, and if he wasn’t then Stiles certainly wasn’t gonna pressure him or nag about it.

Stiles nuzzled against Derek’s arm a little, then he squinted at the book he was reading, tried to see if he could figure out what it was, but he couldn’t read the text from that angle. As he lifted his head enough to actually see the text, and not just a garbled mass that risked triggering a panic attack, he wondered if it was even in English. He got almost giddy as that thought crossed his mind, how nerdy and amazing his polyglot boyfriend was, and how proud Stiles was over him.

“What’cha reading?” he asked, when he had determined it to be Spanish, and looked up at Derek’s face, only to see him flinch slightly and blink before looking away. Stiles furrowed his brows as he tried to look at him, and he carefully asked, “What’s wrong?”

Derek turned to him then, a stiff smile on his lips. “Nothing, it’s all good,” he said, and he sounded sincere, but he looked like he was close to tears.

Stiles rolled so he was more on his back and could reach up between Derek’s arms to cup his jaw, and when he gently stroked his thumb over his cheek Derek swallowed roughly and closed his eyes.

“Are you upset?” Stiles asked quietly and Derek shook his head minutely.

“No, no, I’m good,” he said, and he opened his eyes and smiled at Stiles. “I’m just, happy.”

When Derek smiled Stiles kind of automatically smiled back, but the little pause before happy had Stiles furrowing his brows again.

“Will you tell me what’s happening?” he asked and Derek took a shaky breath. “Please? I feel like I’m missing something, and you’re usually not this vague anymore, and I worry.”

“I really don’t want to,” Derek said and breathed out a huff of a humorless laugh.

“I know,” Stiles said. “You don’t have to, you know that.”

Derek nodded and furrowed his brows as he put the dust jacket on the side he was on in the book before closing it and putting it to the side. He stayed where he was though, leant on his elbows, and he looked at his empty hands when he finally spoke.

”I said no,” he said and shot Stiles a quick look before he frowned down at his hands and swallowed.

”Yes?” Stiles asked, more than a little confused. ”That happens, that we say no..?”

Derek nodded and Stiles moved up on his own elbow while he waited for something more, anything more.

”I’m sorry,” Derek mumbled and Stiles just got more confused, and a little bit scared.

”For what?” he whispered, not really knowing if he wanted to hear the answer.

”Saying no,” Derek said and what?

”You-, what? No, you never have to apologize for that, Derek?” Stiles said. Asked. He wasn’t sure. ”If you don’t want to you don’t want to, I’ll always accept that.” Derek just nodded and Stiles felt himself go a little desperate. ”You do know that, right?”

Derek shot him a quick look with a wobbly smile that disappeared as soon as he looked back at his hands and Stiles felt like he was punched in the gut.

”I mean,” Derek started hesitantly and Stiles wanted to not be there, to not hear anything more, because if he was right in his suspicions? Just, no. ”I guess I know that,” Derek continued though and Stiles stomach was getting kind of cold. ”It’s just… it feels-. It sometimes feels like I’m just my body? That you see me and get turned on by what you see and then you get me hard and we have sex and I feel… used.”

The last word was no more than a whisper, but it had Stiles almost nauseated.

”I’m sorry,” he whispered. ”I’m-, fuck, Derek, I’m so sorry, I never want you to feel that, I-, oh god, I’m so sorry, you know that’s not all I see, right? Please tell me you know that, that I love you for your brain and your heart and everything that’s you?”

Derek turned to him and smiled softly at that. ”I do know that, you tell me that every single day,” he said and Stiles breathed out in relief.

”Okay, good, god, thank you,” he said. ”I’m not sure what to do though, how to fix that, so you don’t feel that way anymore, because while I do love your body too, and to have sex with you, that’s like, I don’t know, the least important to me? You are everything, you, not… just the physical, but you, and if you decide you’ll never want sex again I’ll be perfectly fine with that.”

”You could ask?” Derek said quietly and Stiles raised his eyebrows. ”If I want to.”

”That-. Yes. I’m sorry, I thought, oh god, I’m so sorry Derek. I just assumed, because you got a little annoyed when I asked in the beginning, and then you’ve said no, so I’ve just assumed, but yes, I’ll ask, of course I’ll ask, I am so sorry, Derek.”

Derek smiled at him and shook his head. ”You asked about everything, that’s what was annoying, you basically interrupted fully consented sex to ask if it was okay.”

”I wanted to be sure!” Stiles squeaked, but then he quickly sobered. ”And then I stopped asking.”

”Yeah,” Derek said quietly.

”But you, I’m not saying you’re doing anything wrong, I just want to understand everything, so please don’t think I’m questioning you now, or saying it’s your fault, because it’s not, but you have said no. What’s different between those times and the other times?”

”I’ve been tired or busy or you’ve been injured,” Derek said and Stiles nodded as he waited for more. That didn’t come.

”Oh, okay, oh, oh no, okay, you’ve only said no if you’ve had a reason for it that’s not just ‘I don’t feel like it’, is that, fuck, okay.”

”I mean, I get hard, it’s hard to say no when I’m hard,” Derek said quietly.

”Okay. I can’t say that I understand exactly, because I kind of always feel like it, but I can imagine, I think. Regardless though, you can always say no, always, no exceptions, and I promise I’ll ask in the future.”

”Thank you,” Derek said softly and Stiles shook his head.

”I’ve done something wrong, Derek, you don’t need to thank me for stopping that,” he said.

”Yes, I do,” Derek said. ”I have to thank you for listening to me, for accepting everything I am, for being so willing to change something like this, because it means so much to me.”

”And that right there breaks my heart,” Stiles said with a sad smile. ”You’re welcome though. I’ll always want you happy, that’s kinda my priority, so it’s not like it’s a chore for me.”

“And I love you for that,” Derek said, then he gently pushed and pulled on Stiles until he was more or less on his back and Derek could lay down with his head on Stiles’ shoulder.

“I’m sorry, though, really, I never want you to feel like that, like I only see your body or that you can’t say no,” Stiles said as he put a hand in Derek’s hair.

“I know that,” Derek said quietly. “I do know that, but… it’s hard, to believe it.”

Stiles pressed a kiss to Derek’s forehead. “I know. I’ll be better, I promise.”

“You’re already good,” Derek said.

“And I’ll be better,” Stiles repeated. “Consent is important to me, and I’m down to fuck like 95 percent of the time, but you’re not, I know that, and I shouldn’t have assumed.”

Stiles played with Derek’s hair as Derek absentmindedly ran his fingers through Stiles’ chest hair, and they kept talking. Stiles apologized a couple of more times, because honestly, he felt like shit about it, and Derek quietly but steadily told him it was okay, that he was glad they talked about it and that that alone made him feel better.

A while later Stiles remembered that Derek wasn’t wearing pants and the thing poking Stiles’ thigh wasn’t Derek’s phone, so he moved his head awkwardly to look at his face.

“Are you… hard?” he asked and Derek smiled at him.

“Finally noticed that, huh?” he asked.

“I honestly thought it was your phone first, but you’re not wearing pants,” Stiles said and Derek laughed softly.

“I’m not, no,” he said. “All this talk about consent though, I like it.”

“You, my love, have the strangest turn ons, and this is most definitely not a complaint, just an observation that makes me love you even more,” Stiles said and Derek smiled at him and shrugged one shoulder.

“You keep ensuring me you want my consent and you keep changing how you do things just to make me happy,” he said.

“I never want to do anything you don’t want to do,” Stiles said. “Consent is sexy.”

“Consent is damn sexy,” Derek agreed, then he pressed his erection against Stiles hip. “Wanna fuck?”

Stiles snorted out an ugly giggle at that, then he grinned at Derek. “I do,” he said. “Do you?”