#I don’t desperately want to go home but I don’t think I’m gonna ever travel internationally again to stay with a friend

[disappearingcigarette]

I should figure out why self aware people piss me off

[ncteez]

Give & Take (l.s)

It’s not weird that you and your roommate do certain things that others would consider, um, strange. It’s not weird because you don’t make it weird, and he certainly doesn’t go out of his way to make a big deal either. 

or the one where you and your roommate masturbate together casually until it becomes not so casual, and maybe neither of you can do it at this point without wanting more.

ao3 | m.list | reblog to give seokmin a boner 

minors dni!! 

WORDCOUNT― 6.6k

PAIRING― seokmin x afab reader 

CONTENT― roommate au, roommates to lovers

NOTE― This is dedicated to @onlyseokmins and that’s all I have to say about this. (i’m a liar i actually want this man so bad so here’s my need for him in fic form and also a direct attack on elv.) not proof read.

smut tags under cut:: 

smut tags― big dick seokmin, mutual masturbation, pining, desperate stuff i guess, pretending he’s fucking you instead of his hand,  just the tip moment, unprotected sex, he pulls out bc he’s polite. ~

Moving in with Seokmin was a no-brainer. Both of you were freshly graduated from the same college and starting new jobs in the same city hours away from home. Seeing a familiar face in a city of bustling businesses and loud streets was a welcome comfort for you, living with that familiar face only made it easier. 

It wouldn’t be a lie to say that back during the college days, you and Seokmin weren’t close. Not until your senior year together that the two of you somehow met in the middle with a single class despite the drastically different majors. He took it as an elective, yours was the last “easy” class to get through before graduation, because maybe your advisor fucked up and never told you it was necessary to take, and maybe you were a little mad about it. 

You became less mad as you helped Seokmin through his struggles. An elective for him was a career for you, so it was easy to walk him through it. You grew close within the stress of senior year so of course, when you found out he was moving to the same city that you’re moving to, you instantly jumped into action in trying to convince him to save money by living together with you. 

It’s a big city, and while you both had jobs lined up, it’s not like the pay was enough for one person to afford an apartment in the heart of the city. Thankfully, he didn’t need to be swayed and it only took a few weeks for the two of you to head out and explore the apartments offered, landing on one that leaves an equal distance both of you would need to travel to work. One that only costs some seven hundred and fifty dollars a month each (a hefty amount for just one person.) 

By now, it’s been about six months since the two of you settled here in the heart of a great city. Work has been going smoothly despite the tired nights when the two of you meet up outside (because somehow you both clock out at the same time too) and decide on whether you want to walk to a shop for dinner or fight over who is gonna put the nuggets in the oven this time. 

Things were normal for the most part, you think, regarding roommates anyway. There is one thing that’s changed though. Not your fondness of him, not even the way you look at him when he’s being annoying and loud while singing in the shower. 

It started about two months into living in this space with him. He must have lost track of the time that day because he knew your schedule then and still knows it now like the back of his hand. He took the day off, feigning sickness after a long Sunday of doing absolutely nothing and wanting to extend it just a bit longer through the following Monday. You worked that day, of course, you did. You came home on time as you always did too, except this time you didn’t come home to him in his room or cooking dinner. 

It was a weird kind of rush, wondering how the fuck this could be happening as you stood at your doorway to find him exposing more of himself than you ever expected or wanted to see at the time. There, on the couch was your dope of a roommate, legs spread wide and length in hand. On the tv played nothing, but his phone was propped on his thigh as he stared down at it with deep sighs. 

You were frozen at that moment, watching him and feeling your cheeks warm up. You didn’t know if you should turn to leave, make a noise so he stops, or just watch. Somehow, you found yourself not wanting to disturb him. Was it because you liked what you saw? At the time, you would have said absolutely not. But seeing how it is now, it’s more common than not to see him orgasm, it’s kind of laughable.

On that day, he must have felt someone watching him because mid-stroke he looked up at you and fumbled his pants back over his length. Muffling apologies with raspy whispers, skin glistening on his forehead indicating he must’ve been at it for a while, and you were just standing there silent. 

That night, you laid in your bed wondering why you couldn’t get that image out of your head. Seeing him like that wasn’t something you ever thought about despite how handsome he is. He’s your friend, he’s your roommate. You can’t stop thinking now though, about how big he is in all of his entirety. From his height to his– yeah. 

It went on like that for about two weeks. You, not able to get that image out of your head and him, acting as normal as ever as if it never happened. It wasn’t until the end of that two-week time span that you realized you enjoyed it. Like you would have liked to have seen him finish. 

It swam in your brain for a while, wondering if you should bring it up or if you should push past it and find some guy to meet up with just to work out the horny energy, after all, it’s not like you know anyone in this city well enough to have an intimate relationship with. No one besides Seokmin anyway. Dilemmas, dilemmas. 

Not so much a dilemma though, to your pleasure. It’s brought up one night on a Saturday as the two of you say at the kitchen table complaining about work. Minutes passed, then an hour passed and he suggested having a drink to wind down. You accepted, sipping the alcohol he so proudly made for you. 

It felt warm in the apartment by that point, but you didn’t mind as you found your brain falling back to that image of him. You thought he might be wearing the same shirt that we was wearing that day, which is kind of detrimental for your fogging brain. But, he brings it up. 

“You know, you’ve been kind of weird since that day.” He commented, running his fingers along the rim of his glass. “I really did lose track of time, and I can’t stop feeling embarrassed by it.”

You could see a softer side of him at that moment. Out of how long you’ve known him by now, never once have you seen him embarrassed. 

“About that,” You started, not able to look him in the eye. “I was shocked but–” 

The way he looked at you at that moment was difficult to process. It was new ground for both of you. 

“I think I liked it?”

~

The tip-toeing around each other didn’t last as long as you expected it to. After the talk you had with him on that Saturday night, somehow the two of you ended up doing the very thing that had you in a rut in the first place.

You got to watch him in full, working himself up until he suggested you join, that maybe he’d be into it too. Saying that he felt weird being the only one, though he didn’t mind that you were watching. You don’t know what got into you that night, maybe it was the alcohol, but you did join him. A full five feet away from each other but shamelessly watching hand movements until orgasm. You noted him holding off too, until you got there. It was an interesting dynamic, truly. 

And now, six months into living with him, it’s become a normal occurrence. After every hard day at work, “wanna get off with me?”, after every long movie session or board game loss, “wanna watch each other come?”, to the point that now it’s nearing every day. Any self-fuck session became a shared one. 

Sometimes he even texts you from his room late at night. It’s like you know his jerk-off schedule more than your own work schedule by now. Sometimes, you don’t even touch yourself but instead, enjoy watching him get there with a little help from you, taking off your shirt or spreading your legs. It’s become a thing. And somehow, it’s not as weird as it should be. 

“You got plans this weekend?” Seokmin bellows through a yawn from his room after hearing your alarm go off. 

“Since when do I ever have plans?” You say through your own yawn after pulling yourself out of the bed. You tiptoe the few feet from your door to his, leaning against it and scratching the back of your neck. “Why?”

He stretches loud and obnoxiously before rolling over and planting his face into his pillows. 

“Wanna skip out on work today?” 

You step into his room, throwing yourself on top of him with a tired groan. 

“Yeah,” You sigh out, closing your eyes and fully aware that you could go back to sleep right now despite this uncomfortable position over your roommate. “but why?”

His voice is muffled more by the pillows when he answers you, mostly because your body weight is pressing him further down. He fights to turn his head away from the pillow, takes in a deep breath from the brief smothering, and smiles. 

“I dunno, we haven’t really had a chance to go out and explore the city much outside of furniture and grocery shopping.” 

You realize that he’s right. You’ve heard talk of the malls in this area, of the theme parks, the museums. There’s so much to do here, and neither of you have really attempted to do any of it. 

“Starting today, because we are going to skip work,” He narrows his eyes as he lifts his body up and forces you to roll off of him. “You are going to skip, right?”

You nod, waiting for him to continue what he was originally going to say. 

“We should go out and explore. Rent is paid already, fridge is full, I saved up a bit so we could go do some stuff.”

It flies right past your head. You don’t even stop to think that he saved up to do this with you, and instead you simply nod with a smile before hopping off of him and rolling off of the bed to your feet.

“Guess I should call my boss.” You shrug, starting to leave the room. 

“Wanna sleep a little more first? Kind of dumb to skip out on work and not sleep in.”

You nod again, yawning and looking down at your phone to search for your workplace number. Thankfully, after calling, there was no issue with you skipping work today. After all, you haven’t really missed a single day since you started (unlike some people: seokmin.)

~

Friday was eventful, the two of you walked to all of the shops closest to your apartment, stepping into a cafe and having some coffee, then went to a pristine shopping district and scoffed together at the price of a pair of socks. 

By the time you got home, you were just as tired as you would have been coming home from work, and he was still bouncing on his feet. Drinks, dinner, sleep. 

No casual masturbation that day.

On Saturday, it started much the same except this time the two of you went to a mall. Why he kept insisting on buying you cute panties and matching bras? You know the answer. You’re kind of part of his porn collection now, and he is part of yours too. Maybe he considered it a little too hard when you also suggested he get a cute pair of panties to wear. He didn’t though, and instead bought you like six too-expensive sets of lingerie. Each color to match whatever horny brain he’s in, you assume. 

That night, the two of you ate at a restaurant and took a taxi back home. Sitting beside him on the couch, a question started floating in your brain and by now you knew better than to keep these kinds of things to yourself given the dynamic you have with him.

“You know, you’re buying me all of this sexy stuff–” 

“I am, yeah.” He smiles proudly, eyes crinkling as his eyes shoot to the bag on the kitchen table. 

“Why aren’t you just going out to meet someone instead of settling with jerking off all the time?”

He doesn’t even hesitate.

“That’s a lot of work, why would I do that when you’re right here?”

Why would he do that if you’re here? 

“Why, you getting bored of me?” He jokes, leaning against you and nudging your shoulder. “Should I have bought those panties to spice it up a bit?”

God, it’s so weird how normal this is. No touching each other, only looking. Desperate looking at that, searing eyes, extremely hot orgasms, wobbling legs, and then sleeping alone. Would it really be so strange at this point to want to touch him? To want to spice it up not with panties, but with the act of actually feeling how warm he is? 

“Oh no.” He pauses, eyes widening. “You actually wanted me to wear those?”

“No!” You laugh, though it would’ve maybe awoken something in you, you’re not sure. “I just figured you know, it’s not like you wouldn’t be able to go get laid.”

He stares are you before throwing out another joke. 

“I know that.” He laughs, turning to face you. “It’s not like it would be hard for you either. Why aren’t you out and about instead of sitting in front of me and touching yourself?”

You freeze at his words, realizing that so many times it’s been silent sessions together save for moaning. He’s never actually said those words to you, never dirty talked, never crossed an invisible line while it happened. 

“Would you prefer I go find someone else?” You avoid the feeling in your gut right now only briefly, staring him down.

“No, I’d honestly prefer you touch yourself for me and only me.” 

Oh. Oh fucking no. 

“That’s all you need to be satisfied?” 

He smiles proudly again, eyes flicking back over to the bag and you shake your head at him. 

“We need to wash those before I wear them so you’re gonna have to deal with the boring panties I wore today, I guess.”

He nods, already following suit on the regular list of things he does when this happens. 

It’s always so quiet, and never did it bother you until now. Watching him do nothing but grab his length and squeeze it until it starts to harden. Eyes on you as you do your own version of working yourself up, hand down your waist band and simply touching and rubbing until you feel the first sensation of your gut flipping.

“Seokmin.” You start, looking at him through narrow eyes. This is enough for you, but…is it?

“Hm?” He responds, eyes focused on the movement under your shorts. 

“Can you talk a little bit this time?” 

He smiles, chuckling a bit at you for the question.

“Oh, you’re into that?” He says almost in a mocking tone, but it sends a little wave of heat through his body to have you asking for more of him in some way. “I can’t promise I won’t say something stupid though.”

You shake your head, running your fingers up your folds and stopping at your clit.

“I don’t care what you say, I just really like your voice right now.”

Another pause from him as you watch him adjust his almost fully erect length under his pants. 

“Only right now?” He asks, trailing his fingers gently along the underside of his length and turning his body back to where his back is against the couch cushions. 

“No, I mean, I like your voice all the time but you never say much when we do this–” You admit, watching him intently like you always do, feeling the clock tick up to the point you know he’s going to pull it out and start sighing. 

“Alright, does this mean I can ask for something too?”

You quirk a brow at that but quickly nod in anticipation because finally, this is going somewhere past just watching. 

“Can we like, um–” He blushes mid-question, turning his face to look at you with all of his shame showing plainly. “Can we do it in an actual position for once?”

You can’t tell if your mind is playing tricks on you or if he’s actually wanting to pretend he’s fucking you by suggesting that. Immediately you fumble with the button on your shorts to get them off. 

“Yeah, Oh–” You stop yourself from sounding too excited. “I mean, like, what position?”

“Can I be on top?” He blurts, pulling his hand away from his length and once again looking at you and the way your fingers remain on the hem of your shorts, preparing to take them off. 

The image alone in your head of that is enough to want exactly what he wants, if not more. The illusion of him fucking you while you fuck yourself? You really couldn’t ask for more than that at this moment, though that could be argued if you think too hard about it.

“Deal.” 

The second you say that word, he’s jumping up and practically tearing his pants off of him. His eagerness is as loud and obnoxious as always, you can even hear a small “fuck yeah” whispered to himself when he does it. All is well and good until he’s tugging your shorts down for you.

Never has he taken your clothes off for you. The intimacy is flowing through you, but you’re not sure if he is feeling the same way about it. He’s probably just eager to try something new tonight rather than the usual. 

Your shorts are off faster than you’d normally take them off and you’re kind of chuckling about his blatant desperation until he hovers over you and positions himself where he wants to be. 

Now…now he’s intimidating. With both knees on the couch, your legs bent at the knees and resting on his hips. That doesn’t even matter to you right now, because you haven’t seen his face this close before. You haven’t felt his hips against your legs before, outside of when you flop down on each other during a tired morning to wake the other up. You’ve never felt your stomach flip like this over him.

And when his eyes leave that spot between your legs to meet your own with his same dopey smile, it’s like you melt into a puddle instantly and you’re wanting so much more than just this. You hold back though, finally pulling your eyes from his and looking between his legs.

You knew his cock was big but you’ve also never seen it this close to your body. It’s like, big big. Thick too, and never did you notice just how huge it is because his hands are equally huge, and wrap around it perfectly. To him, it’s a perfectly accurate cock for a man so tall and broad, but damn. 

It’s a bit embarrassing that all it took was for him to hover over you with his cock out to have you forgetting that you asked for him to talk through it. You’re in danger. Extreme danger with him like this and eager to talk this time. It starts so fast, so casually, and you’re still spinning internally just to grasp what you’re feeling right now. 

“Good?” 

That all he fucking says to start, settling into his position fully and grasping himself. Honestly, his cock is only a few inches above your core and you can feel the heat from it.

You nod, curling in on yourself a bit and he takes note of it because you’re never fucking shy. 

“Too much?” He asks, watching you shake your head in response. “God, thank fuck. Because you look so good right now.”

Spinning. 

“You can let go of me now though, I can see how wet you are already.” He continues, chuckling at the way your arms grip his shoulders.

You didn’t even fucking notice that you instantly started clinging to him. Especially with the fact that you didn’t expect him to talk to you like this. The two of you haven’t even started yet and he’s already got you on the verge of insanity. 

You’re quick to pull your arms back and lift your shirt up over your chest before slowly trailing your hand down. 

“Match my pace, okay? It’ll feel better.” He instructs, blatantly making a point so it does look and feel like he’s actually fucking you, all movements matching, sounds matching, lust matching.

You nod again, silently, eyes now focusing on his cock because if you look at his face right now you might just buckle and start crying over how insanely hot he is. 

He lets out a short chuckle at your silence, he’s used to that and didn’t take issue with it at all until you asked him to talk. He hopes you talk back at some point, but for now he leaves it alone as he starts stroking.

Precum is leaking already just from seeing you beneath him like this, bra covering your chest, panties covering your pussy– but it’s enough to get him going. He would feel selfish to ask for more unless you offer it first. He’s got you where he’s always wanted you since this whole thing started. 

You watch his hands, slipping your fingers under your panties and sliding them through your folds at the same pace, shivering only slightly at the feeling at you watch him. 

This pace works for a few minutes, but you note his grip grows tighter on himself and you hear his breath stutter in a sigh when he does it. You wonder what that feels like for him, and you wonder what he’s thinking about as he does it. You move your fingers to your clit at that point, pressing in and releasing your own sigh of relief.

He watches you, eyes shooting to your face and studying the way you close your eyes to really feel it. 

“Look at you,” he coos, trying to talk like you asked him to. “feels better when I’m here, right?”

You half open your eyes with a crooked smile, because of course it feels better when he’s with you. Even if he’s not touching you, even if he’s not the one doing it. 

“So pretty when you do this, you know–” He continues, praising you and falling into the words easier than he expected. “I think I fell in love with watching you from the second you spread your legs for me.”

You can’t. You can’t look at him when he’s talking to you, it’s a lot. It does something, it does a lot of something to you, so you focus on his cock and the way he starts pressing his hips into the circle his fingers create rather than pumping himself. He’s slow with it, lazily moving his hips back, forward, then back again. 

At that moment, you slide your fingers down and tease at your entrance, dipping a finger in easily and releasing a sigh. You can’t imagine this one finger will mimic what he could do to you, but you settle. 

“That’s it,” he says as he watches, hanging his head and knowing exactly what you’re doing with your fingers. “Can I see?”

You don’t respond and instead use your other hand to hook your panties to the side, revealing your finger sliding into you at the pace he’s sliding into his palm. 

The sigh he lets out begins to form into a moan at the end as he watches, wetting his lips and furrowing his brows. He keeps his hips steady despite obsessing over the fact that you’re fucking yourself at the same pace for illusion’s sake. 

“Put in another.” He instructs, watching you do just that and release another sigh. He’s becoming frustrated with the situation though, knowing for a fact that he could do better for you. Knowing that if you’d just suggest it, he would instantly be giving in. “Is that even enough for you?”

Your eyes shoot open and go straight to his face, which is staring down intently at the way your fingers fuck you open. 

“Not always.” You admit, shooting your gaze back down to his cock and the way his grip tightens around it. “Is that enough for you?” You follow up, pointing to his hand with your head.

“Not always…” he mimics you, and then it’s silent as the two of you accept the fact that this has to be enough right now.

And it stays like that for a while. To the point that his hips are relentlessly fucking into his palm, causing his knuckles to bump your clit every few seconds, and you’ve buried in a third finger trying your best to pretend it’s him. 

It’s both too much and not enough. Too much in the fact that he’s all over you, and too little in the fact that he’s right there and not in you. Your fingers aren’t enough when his cock is right there, his words aren’t enough when he’s not muffling that voice with your lips, and you can’t imagine he’s not feeling frustrated with the situation. All of the puzzle pieces are in front of you and neither of you are putting in the effort other than organizing them. You’re not snapping them together, you’re just on the fucking edge of the situation you want. 

Does he want it? Is it too much to ask? Is it–Oh. 

“Can I–” he starts, cutting himself off with a sharp breath because of the way you clearly are trying to reach deeper inside of yourself in pace with his long thrusts. 

“Yes.” You don’t even know what he’s asking, and to be fair you don’t think you give a shit. Whatever he wants to do, please, just do it. 

And he does without a second thought, releasing his grip and pulling at your wrist to slip your fingers out of yourself. Then, he presses his cock directly between your holds, holding it down as he picks up the pace again and thrusts up.

It’s not what you were expecting, but then again you should have known he wasn’t asking to fuck you. This is good though, feeling his cock sliding between your lips, head bumping your clit. The warmth, the heaviness, the way his length is so thick that all you can do is try to not feel empty while it’s sliding through your arousal.

He’s more focused now than he was before, nearly letting out a sob rather than a moan at the feeling of your pussy against the underside of his cock. It's like he’s getting everything he needs and nothing at the same time, but the image of your eyes staring down at it too was enough for him to know you like it too. You like it enough. 

When you let out a moan, trailing your hands up to your chest and releasing your tits from the bra, he only grinds faster against you, pressing down harder on his cock to create a tight space between your pussy and his palm. He stares at your tits, and then at your lips, and then back down at the way your pussy lips spread around his cock as he slides through them. 

Another hidden sob pretending to be a moan, and then he’s leaning closer to your face. 

“If I kiss you, would you be mad?”

You instantly strain your neck to connect your lips with his, and he falls into it all too easily. You can feel him speed up his thrusts, and you can feel his desperate tongue. It takes you a moment to realize this is your first kiss, and it’s while his cock is getting off against you. 

Its more than you could have asked for, honestly, but you’re going to ask for more because as you kiss him, well, all you can think of is how this looks outside of your position. It definitely looks like he’s fucking you. The image that you can’t even see in full is arousing you beyond belief as you kiss him, and when he pulls back for a breath, you take that short moment to spill your thoughts.

“Just a little.” You groan blankly, squeezing your breast in your hand and using your other hand to push his cock away from you. “Just–”

He stops, out of breath, trying and failing to comprehend what you’re trying to say. 

“Just what?” He groans, grabbing his cock and pumping it much like he normally would. 

“A little, just put it in a little bit.”

His face is on fire as his hand halts on his leaking cock. Did he hear you wrong? He’s watching your hands squeeze against your chest, he sees your eyes avoiding him, he can still taste your lips on his, and your pussy is just below his cock, pulsing around nothing. Is he reading you wrong?

“Just a little bit…” he repeats what you ask for, looking down at you and placing a hand on your thigh, spreading his fingers out wide. “You’re asking me to fuck you, just a little bit?”

God, the words. So few words but also so many words.

“Yes.”

He leans down inches from your face and you can feel his cock fall back to your folds at the moment, you shiver unintentionally.

“Are you sure? I don’t want to do that and then you end up regretting it.”

He told himself time and time again during these sessions with you that he would instantly jump for the opportunity to fuck you, but now that he’s faced with it– he doesn’t know what the fuck to do with himself aside from asking for confirmation as many times as he can until he believes you really want it. 

“Just,” You still avoid his eyes and the way they’re staring through you. “Please.”

He nods in an unsure way at first before pulling back and holding his length in his hand again. 

“Just a little bit, right?” He tries to confirm, and you nod.

With a deep breath, pounding heart, and spinning thoughts, he aligns himself with you and doesn’t know how to comprehend the feeling of slipping into you. So he simply…doesn’t.

You can feel the intense stretch instantly, the feeling you’ve been searching for making you shiver and nearly writhe beneath him. Just an inch, it’s all you need, he doesn’t have to do any more than that. You don’t need more, you have self-control, right?

“Oh, fuck,” he groans as your pussy envelops the head of his cock. He can feel the pulsing inside of you massage against it, he can feel the wetness, the fucking warmth. “Fuck, fuck.” 

It’s all he can say, honestly, speechless at your silence of the act. The way your mouth falls open in a silent moan only urges him to give you short, single inch thrusts despite the wetness you offer making it difficult to not accidentally slide further in.

“So thick,” You whine out in a broken and desperate voice. 

It causes him to have to take in a deep breath and hold it. Good lord, he’s fighting so many demons right now not to plunge into you and take whatever he can get. 

“A little more,” you urge him, wiggling your hips and sucking him in against his own movements. He doesn’t mind it, nor does he mind the embarrassing sound he lets out at the feeling. 

Now, he can thrust another inch in, stretching you open a little more, shocked that the three fingers you used before didn’t seem to come close to preparing you for this. He can feel how tight your walls are around him, and again, the demons. 

He lets out another embarrassing sound when he looks down, seeing only a quarter of his cock inside of you. He, once again, holds himself back from pushing in more. He could go so deep, but he can’t. 

“Little more?” He asks meekly, reaching a hand out to your cheek in the hope that you’d let him. He won’t ask again. Just, if he can get half of his cock in you, it would be plenty. It would be enough, he would be satisfied. 

“Or,” you groan at the adjustment around him, knowing full well that by asking him to put the tip in that you’d want so much more. It’s fun thinking you can control yourself, but it’s more fun losing that control with another person. You’re both controlling the need to fuck and be fucked solely because you don’t know if the other wants it. But god, he’s already inside of you, isn’t it fucking obvious?! 

“You could just fuck me.”

Say no more, with those words it’s like his hips act of their own will and he’s slowly sliding into you in full. Relishing in the way your pussy spread out to make room, cooing over the feeling of himself going deeper, deeper, and fucking deeper into you. 

“Finally.” He breathes out in relief when he bottoms out, leaning forward yet again to lay his lips against your forehead. “Felt like I’ve waited so long.”

You’re silent as you adjust to what you can consider the biggest cock you’ve ever taken. The searing pain isn’t much compared to the arousal of his admittance of wanting this only after getting inside of you. 

All you can offer him is a moan when you try to respond with your own witty sex talk, but he sends him spiraling somehow further than he already had gone. His hips stuttering in their planted spot as he lets you adjust, moaning in response to your moan. His lips kissing all over your face now, feeling in this moment that you’re his, and this feeling is shared, and that only your pussy could massage him this way simply because he’s inside of you. It’s overwhelming, all of the feelings hitting at once.

From physical feelings to emotional ones, it comes with such a harsh hit to him that all he can do is flutter those kisses to as much skin his lips can reach. Feeling your eyelashes on his cheek when he kisses the corner of your mouth, to feeling that corner of your mouth open in a yelp when he finally starts to move his hips back. Sliding out of you only a little bit before pressing back in again, deep and lazy.

“Good?” He asks, much like he did before. “So good.” He answers for both of you immediately after, keeping that lazy pace as he leans on his elbows on either side of your head. 

“Wrap your legs around me?” He follows up, already so comfortable speaking through your silence that it feels natural, especially when you do just as he asks.

In wrapping your legs around him, he’s able to adjust his body from the position he’s been stuck in this whole time. Now, he can be on his knees with you curled under him, clinging to him like a koala as he uses the back of the couch to support his balance. 

There, he’s able to pick up pace, there he’s able to see what you look like when you’re being fucked. There, he can see what you look like when he’s the one doing it. And he might be spiraling, but he feels more sane than he ever has in this moment, watching your lips and feeling you squeeze around him.

It’s no wonder he felt no interest in finding someone else. He was more satisfied jerking on in front of you than he had ever been actually inside of another person. Now though, it’s insane to think he was satisfied because he’s changed his mind. Why would he find someone else when you act like this? 

Why would he put himself through the possibility of you going out and doing the same thing with someone else? 

For you, there are no thoughts, just Seokmin. You’d laugh right now if it weren’t for the fact that each thrust forces a desperate and wet sound out of your throat. You’d laugh harder if it weren’t for the fact that you don’t even need to rub your clit to get yourself there.

He easily hits that soft spot inside of you, time and time again as his lips travel over repeated areas until landing on your mouth.

You kiss him harder than before, now trying to move your hips despite the difficulty of being under him. You try to meet him halfway now that he’s sliding nearly his entire cock out before slamming back into you. Emptying you and filling you up time and time again as if to remind you of the few moments before when you felt him for the first time. 

Repeatedly you think you’re about to come, and repeatedly you hold off until he whispers.

“I know that face, you’re holding back.”

It’s so fucking surreal knowing that he knows this without ever actually fucking you before now. He knows what you look like when you come, he knows how you like to be touched after watching you so many times. He knows where you sleep, knows what your favorite foods are, and showers in the same bathroom as you. 

You let go, thinking of only him and this moment you’re sharing. You don’t worry if it’ll ever happen again, because you know it will if he lets it. You’re not in control of this anymore, nor of yourself. 

“Pretty, like always.” He compliments when you make that familiar face of release, pumping into you faster now just to feel the gush of wet he’s seen leave your body time and time again. “Prettier now, though.” He corrects himself, feeling just what he was expecting as your body releases the tension all at once. 

The wet sounds somehow become wetter as he thrusts, still fluttering those kisses across your face to the point that you’re either numbed to it or tingling because of it. And only after he knows you’re finished does he pull out, fucking against his hand so aggressively that you’re more aware now than before that he always lets you finish first if not at the same time.

Except now, if he were to finish at the same time, he’d be filling you up so that there’s no question about the worry that comes after it. Despite knowing you’re on birth control, despite knowing you’re both clean because neither of you have fucked another person in half a year–

You watch with drowsy eyes as he releases strings of thick, white seed against both your pussy and stomach. Your panties, ruined and forgotten as they strain at the crease of your thigh. You whimper at the sight, so in love with the way it feels hitting you for some reason. So endeared with the way he pulled out despite knowing in his head that it would have been fine if he stayed. 

When he flops down over you, ignoring the mess between your bodies, you’ve never felt so close to him. You don’t think you ever want to feel further from him, actually. 

It’s the start of something else now, you’re not sure what, but it’s a given.

~

The start of something new came in the form of his room turning into a guest room for a new roommate. 

That roommate has yet to be found, but it’s an excuse to sleep next to him every night. No titles have been claimed but they’re definitely been given. Just a day after that happened, you caught him slipping and calling you his girlfriend. He figured that since you didn’t correct him, it must be true.

Yeah, it must be. 

[mountttmase]

Always Meant To Be

Note - everyone’s favourite baby is back ☺️ little Thea is my princess and I’m so glad you all love her so much so I could write more of here. I feel like we actually get to know her in this one so enjoy and I’d love to know what you think 🩷

Pairing - Mason Mount × Reader

Word count - 12.9k

Warnings - fluff and smut

Mason was nowhere to be found.

You knew he should be back from training by now as his car was parked up on the drive but you couldn’t find a trace of him anywhere. No bag thrown by the door next to his dirty boots, no training kit thrown in the washing basket and not even the sound of his laughter ringing from his gaming room.

After a long day at nursery, Thea was out for the count. Snoozing away peacefully on the sofa with her favourite soft pink rabbit and once you knew she was fully out you went searching for Mason. He had to be here somewhere you just didn’t know where.

If you were being honest with yourself, you felt a bit weird sneaking around the house like this. You’d only officially moved in with him three weeks ago so whilst this was technically your house now you still felt like you were snooping somehow.

It was only when you got to the second floor that you finally heard his hushed voice. Following it to one of the guest rooms to find him sat on the end of the bed facing away from you as he spoke to someone on the phone.

‘Please mate, it’s just one night. I promise I’ll make it up to you’ he told whoever it was quietly. ‘Thea hasn’t seen her uncle Lew in a month now and she misses you. You don’t want her to forget what you look like do you?’

He was laying it on thick, really wanting Lewis to come and have Thea for the night for some unknown reason and even though you felt bad for listening in you wanted to know what was going on.

‘Okay fine, I’m desperate. They’ve been here three weeks and I’ve barely had a second alone with her. I love Thea with all my heart, you know I do, but it’s been the three of us every night and every morning. One night that’s all I’m asking for’

So that’s what he was asking for? Lewis to take Thea for the night so the pair of you could have some alone time? If you weren’t so desperate for some alone time with him yourself you may have laughed out loud but you managed to hold it in.

The fact of the matter was, he was right. Thea had been so excited about the three of you finally being one big family that she insisted on sleeping with the pair of you in the beginning. You let it slide for for the first two nights as her room was still being redecorated and you loved being all together but now Thea expected it and refused to go to sleep in her own room.

But the fact Mason had gone as far as calling his brother so the pair of you could have some alone time wasn’t something you thought you’d accidentally walk into and the realisation made you giggle. The sound travelling throughout the quiet corridor making Mason whip his head around in confusion before he realised you’d heard.

‘Fuck, Lew just text me yeah? I’ve gotta go’ he told him. Trying to suppress a laugh himself as he beckoned you over and you let him pull you into his lap as he quickly said goodbye and threw his phone down on the bed. ‘Where’s Thea?’

‘Asleep on the sofa’ you confirmed, letting him grip your hips as you straddled his thighs. ‘I was gonna ask what are you doing in here but I think I’ve figured it out’

‘Well sorry for wanting to take my girl out on a date’

‘Just a date, yeah?’

‘Well maybe some other stuff when we get home’ he winked, causing you to giggle as you hid your face in his neck. ‘You know what it’s like at the start of a relationship, I just wanna be on you all the time and it’s difficult’

‘I know’ you sighed. In all honesty you’d been having the same feelings as him but you’d felt a little selfish for it what with Thea being so excited to have you all living together again and she was being as clingy as ever. If it took Lewis coming to steal her for the night for you to get some proper alone time then you were willing to give it a try.

-

Dating Mason was a dream, but that didn’t mean it didn’t come with its challenges. After your trip to Portsmouth for Mason's birthday, he was eager to take you out on a first date. You’d discussed many different options from having the date at home to bringing Thea with you but in the end Mason had asked Luke and his family to watch her for the evening. Not having anyone else close by that he trusted enough to look after his baby and Thea loved Luke’s kids so she was happy to go for a few hours.

Your first date was perfect, he took you to one of his favourite spots for dinner, his eyes practically hanging out of his head when he got a good look at you and after a night of constant flirting and laughing he walked you home and kissed you on your front doorstep. It felt like a fairy tale but dating your baby’s dad did come with its own set of challenges.

Thea was the most confused out of anyone. Not sure why she was being taken to Luke’s house so the pair of you could hang out without her but she was overcome with joy at the way she got to see Mason more than she ever had. Your sweet angel lighting up whenever he was around but you knew the goodbyes were getting tougher as their bond was growing deeper than ever.

You remembered the first time Mason had stayed round later than he ever had. Thea had been in bed for an hour or so but the pair of you were on your sofa having a cuddle when she suddenly appeared out of nowhere. Thea has always been an incredibly emotional and sensitive girl so when she rounded the corner with her eyes full of tears at the thought of being left out, Mason being Mason simply scooped her up and placed her in the middle of the pair of you. Cuddling like a family for the first time since the night at his parents house after Thea’s bad dream. Their matching smiles melted your heart and when Thea was half asleep draped over the pair of your laps, you couldn’t help but lean over and kiss him softly. Letting him know this was all you had ever wanted.

You wanted to ask him then to stay for the night but the pair of you hadn’t reached that point in your relationship just yet and you didn’t want him getting any ideas.

Sex was something you didn’t think you were quite ready for just now and you knew Mason didn’t mind but you knew it was on the horizon. You couldn’t deny there was a level of need for him in that way and once you’d put Thea to bed you shared a dizzying kiss on your front door that nearly had you dragging him back inside and upstairs.

‘Before I go, I was just wondering if you were free next week? Thought you could come over and I’ll cook and maybe you could stay over if you want to?’ He asked, eyes full of nerves as he wasn’t sure if you were ready to stay the night and just as he thought, there was only one question falling from your lips.

‘What about Thea?’

‘Lew’s gonna be here next week. Thought maybe he could baby sit for the night and we can spend some proper time together’ he explained but the panic on your face must have been visible. ‘If you’re not ready we can wait’

‘No I… I want to, let’s do it’ you agreed. Watching his face light up as soon as you’d said yes before he landed another heavy kiss on your lips.

‘I’ll text you yeah?’

‘Okay’ you told him bashfully. Both quickly saying goodnight before he ran to his car and drove away. Leaving you stood on the doorstep wondering what you’d let yourself in for.

When the time eventually arrived, Lewis stayed at your house with Thea as you stayed with Mason and it felt so strange at first to be alone with him like this in this way. Even though when Thea had first been born you’d stayed with Mason, the pair of you were rarely alone since then and you felt like a part of you was missing when Thea wasn’t around.

But you pushed that to the back of your mind tonight. Helping Mason cook as he tried and failed to keep his hands and lips off of you and when the dishwasher had been loaded up he suggested getting ready for bed early so you could cuddle up and watch a movie. You knew exactly what that meant but you followed him in and got settled under the covers in your least mummy looking pair of pjs you could find. Mason didn’t seem to care what you were wearing though. Slotting himself in behind you as he pressed play and almost instantly he began to let his hands wander.

You were willing yourself to relax, to melt into him and let him shower you with affection but you knew you were as stiff as a board no matter how hard he tried. Mason eventually moving away from you slightly and pulling you on your side so you could lay on your back next to him whilst he cupped your jaw and stared into your eyes.

‘Am I being too much?’ He whispered, your tummy sinking automatically at his tone and you wanted to reassure him straight away that he would never be too much.

‘No, that’s not it I’m just… nervous I guess’

‘Me inviting you round… that’s not what tonight was about’ he told you. Not saying the words exactly but you knew he was talking about being physical with each other. ‘I mean don’t get me wrong, I wouldn’t say no’ he teased. Tickling your sides playfully as you melted into him finally and you hated the way he could read you so well. ‘But I just want some time with you, proper time without our little love bug in the way’ he winked.

‘I know, and I promise I won’t keep you waiting too long I just-‘

You couldn’t finish your sentence as he cut you off with a heavy kiss that made your insides flutter, but it was the loving look on his face when you pulled back that let you really know everything was okay.

‘It’s okay, I’ve been waiting years for you. I can wait a little longer’

‘I just haven’t been touched properly like this in a while’ you told him and you should have known what was coming next.

‘When was the last time?’ He asked, a slight tinge of jealousy behind his eyes but little did he know he had nothing to worry about.

You were too embarrassed to admit that the last time you’d been with someone physically was when the pair of you conceived Thea but you knew you’d have to be honest with him at some point. Choosing to skirt around the subject until you were ready to tell him in full and wondering if you could try and wind him up a bit.

‘I mean, I’m no saint exactly. I had a dating app and stuff’ you told him, laughing at the way his jaw slightly dropped and a look of jealousy flashed in his eyes even stronger than before.

‘What? You went on dates? When? And with who?’ He asked, his fingers pinching your sides playfully as he attempted to make out like he wasn’t bothered but just curious however you could read him straight away. Clearly the thought of you being with another man was a bit much for him but you were ready to let him know there was no reason to panic.

‘Well when I say people it’s more like person’ you admitted shyly, ‘and it was only ever when you had Thea for the night’

‘You had a boyfriend?’ He asked curiously, picking up on the way you specified it was only ever one man but you were afraid it had been nowhere near a boyfriend situation.

‘No, not a boyfriend’

‘But you said person?’ He mumbled. His brows drawn together in confusion and you wanted nothing more than to kiss them out away from his lips but your internal embarrassment was stopping you.

‘You really want me to say it huh?’ You laughed, your face flushing out of embarrassment. ‘By person I literally meant one person. I went out with one guy, on one date’

‘What the whole time we’ve had Thea you’ve only been on one date’

‘Correct’

‘What about… you know?’

‘Sex?’

‘Yeah’

‘Nope’ you laughed, watching his eyebrows raise in shock before dropping back to normal.

‘Why not though?’

‘Thea was too little and I never really had time to pursue anything’ you shrugged and you watched a look of guilt wash over his face.

‘I’m so sorry’ he breathed, cupping your jaw gently but your look of confusion prompted him to carry on. ‘I’ve never really thought about it I guess but I bet there’s loads of stuff you’ve had to give up so I could have things my way’

‘It’s fine Mason-‘

‘No it’s not’ he breathed. Kissing your forehead softly. ‘When you’re ready, I’m gonna look after you properly, okay?.

‘Mason’ you giggled, hiding in his neck as he kissed your cheek gently.

‘No I promise you, I’ll make it special. Make up for everything you’ve missed out on’

‘It’s just sex mason’

‘Not with me it won’t be’ he whispered, dropping one last kiss on your lips before laying you on side again and getting settled behind you. ‘We’ve missed the best part now, I’ll have to rewind it’

-

‘So when is Lewis coming?’

‘He’s got some time early next week. He was meant to be here for a meeting anyway but he’s gonna stay an extra few days so we can have a break one night’

‘I bet Lewis thinks we’re great parents’ you laughed. ‘Passing our daughter to him all the time so we can be alone’

‘Hey don’t say that’ he teased. ‘You know how much I love her but if I don’t love you soon I’ll explode’

‘We should really be stricter with her about bedtimes’ you sighed, thinking back over the last few weeks. ‘We've kind of done this to ourselves’ you laughed.

‘I know, I make sure she’s got the best bedroom out of all of us and she wants to spend every night in our bed. Just typical’ he scoffed, rolling his eyes playfully. ‘I shouldn't moan really. Before all of this started, whenever Thea was with you and I’d have to walk past her room I could never look in properly. Like it hurt knowing she’s not here all the time and this wasn’t her proper room, it was just her room at her dads house. It's so empty when she wasn’t here’

‘Now you’ve got the two of us’ you smiled, happy that you could finally make Mason's house feel like a home.

‘Hell yeah I do’ he laughed, grabbing you and pulling you further into his lap. ‘Best thing I ever did was asking you guys to move in’

-

Even though you and Mason were having sleepovers, Thea and Mason still spent nights at his whilst you stayed at yours but as the weeks went on and the drop offs became longer you found yourself not wanting to leave them. You wanted to be involved and wake up next to Mason but you also knew they needed their time together.

It had been a big step for Thea too. Not fully understanding what was going on and why all of a sudden you were staying with daddy all the time without her but when you explained soon you’d be staying together it meant you all got to hang out all the time she was jumping for joy.

You were a little unsure the first night you stayed at Masons with Thea. Getting ready for bed after your shower in the bathroom but he was nowhere to be seen when you finally emerged.

You felt a bit strange wandering off to try and find him but you heard his and Thea’s voices a little way down the hall in the main bathroom when you poked your head out of the bedroom and you followed it there. Stopping just outside so you could peer in and the sight in front of you made you melt.

They both stood with their backs to you, Thea in front of Mason on a stool so she could see herself in the mirror as Mason gently brushed her hair through and you smiled as you noticed the scrunchie on his wrist. You stayed put, hiding out of sight so you could watch them in the mirror and not intrude on their special moment and you wondered if this was a nightly routine for them when it was just the two of them.

‘So I’ll come and get you in the morning yeah? And we can make mummy a special breakfast for her first sleepover with us’ he told her and her excited little face nodded furiously.

‘Cake cakes!’ She giggled, clapping her hands together, knowing she meant pancakes she just hadn’t quite figured that word out yet.

‘Yes baby, mummy’s favourite right?’

‘Yes daddy’ she told him, feeling your eyes prick at the cute scene in front of you. They really were your whole world and getting to watch them like this felt so special.

‘Right, what style are we going for tonight missy? Pigtails? Bun? Mohawk?’ He teased, tickling her sides as they both giggled loudly which only increased on Thea’s end as Mason began to kiss her cheek repeatedly.

‘Bun’ she managed to tell him when he’d finally stopped attacking her but the roll of Mason's eyes let you know he wasn’t happy with her choice.

‘Booooring’ he moaned, brushing it back into a ponytail, watching as she looked at him with a scowl that mirrored his own and you laughed at how scarily similar they looked. Your laugh was clearly a little too loud for Thea’s ears though as her eyes found yours in the mirror and the joy that took over her face made your heart thump.

‘Mummy!’ She shouted, waving her hands at you but it was Mason's face you were looking for next. watching his cheeks redden as you made eye contact but he was motioning for you to come in and join them.

‘What’s going on in here guys?’ You smiled, standing next to Mason as he finished off her hair and you knew he was shy about what was happening as he refused to meet your eyes.

‘Just making sure this one’s all ready for bed like usual’ Mason told you, securing her hair in a bun and you were more than impressed with his hard work as it was probably neater than you could do yourself.

‘Mummy’s hair now’ Thea told Mason assertively, pulling you to her side and grabbing more hair bands and even though the pair of you were laughing you felt a tingle run down your spine and over your skin as he gently began to brush your hair back.

‘What do we think, sweet pea? You want it to match yours?’

‘Yes please’ she told him excitedly and you couldn’t stop the giggles as Mason expertly got to work. His tongue poking out as he concentrated and all you wanted to do was kiss him but instead you reached for Thea. Not content with her standing on a high stall alone and potentially falling off so you picked her up and held her to your body. Your heart thumping as she held you by your cheeks and kissed your face repeatedly just as Mason had done to her just before.

The next time you looked up was when you felt Mason's hands sneaking around your waist so he could pull your body towards his. Looking up to see he’d tied your hair up in a bun that was just as perfect as Thea’s.

‘Wow, you’re pretty good at that’

‘I’ve had a lot of practice,’ he smiled. Kissing your temple gently before reaching over to give Thea’s head a kiss too. ‘Come on then, bedtime for you two’ he laughed. Leading you both out and into Thea’s room where you both popped her in bed and kissed her cheeks whilst she tried not to yawn. Mason only getting as far as half way down the second page of her favourite book before she was fast asleep.

‘Would you like me to read you a bedtime story, my love?’ Mason laughed as he walked you into his bedroom. His cheeky smile letting you know he was joking but you wanted to test him so when you nodded his face dropped slightly.

‘I’ve got my book in my bag, you could read me a few pages if you like’

‘It’s not 50 shades of grey is it?’

‘Oh no, it’s much sexier than that’ you laughed, watching his cheeks redden but your favourite cheeky smirk of his returned instantly.

‘Well how about instead of me reading it to you, you show me what happens? I’ve always been more of a visual learner’ he teased, hands dipping under the hem of your shirt so he could touch your waist and you shivered at the feeling knowing he was about to take care of you just how you liked.

The next morning Mason went missing for a few moments, coming back with Thea in his arms whilst telling you she felt left out but she was barely awake and you knew it was Mason missing their usual morning cuddles. Thea really was Mason's best friend and the pair of them stuck to their promise of getting up and making you breakfast for your first sleepover. Your heart fluttering at the way you found them munching away in the kitchen as they spoke about what they were getting up to that day until they saw you hanging in the doorway and invited you in.

This routine went on for a while. You and Thea spending at least one night a week together at Masons until one night turned into two and sometimes three and you knew Thea had no idea what was going on, she was just happy to be together with the pair of you.

It was just after dinner a few weeks later and you were loading the dishwasher when Thea came to find you. Tonight would be the third night in a row you’d be staying at Masons and you smiled as she trudged her way over to you. Dragging her pink bunny that Mason had gotten her when she was born by the ear but you could tell she looked a little troubled.

This wasn’t a new thing, Thea always seemed to get a little quieter in the evenings where you were at Masons but as soon as you changed her into her pjs she perked up a little bit. You’d been meaning to have a chat with her but you hadn’t got round to it as things had been so busy lately but you stopped what you were doing as she approached you.

‘Thea? You okay sweetie?’ You asked. Kneeling down to her level so you could talk to her properly.

‘We go home soon?’ She asked quietly, pulling her bunny up to her chest to hug it tightly.

‘Tomorrow, baby’ you told her softly. Watching her smile before her shoulders relaxed a tiny bit but she just nodded. Waddling back out and in the direction of the living room to go and play with her toys.

You couldn’t tell what was going through her little head, was she missing your house? did she want to go home? Or was she happy you were still staying here with Mason? You just didn’t know.

What you did know was that Mason hated loading the dishwasher and you knew he was hiding out so he didn’t have to do it. Mason said he was only popping to the loo so when he still wasn’t back as you finished wiping the surfaces you went in search of him, finding him in the back room with his head propped up on his fists and his bottom lip jutting out and the sight made your heart sunk into your tummy.

‘Mase? You alright’ you asked, the sound of your voice making him jump slightly but you could see the sadness in his eyes from a mile away. ‘What’s going on’

‘Nothing’ he told you, shaking his head as you made your way over to him but you knew there was definitely something up and you wanted to get to the bottom of it.

‘Well there is, Mase. You can tell me’ you told him softly. Letting him pull you into his lap so he could hold you and you felt him relax instantly. Holding you as close as he could whilst breathing in your scent before looking up at you shyly.

‘I heard you and Thea talking in the kitchen. Her asking when you’re going home and… I don’t know’

‘Oh Mase’ you pouted, holding him close and you stroked his hair lightly.

‘I just… I love you guys and I want us all here together permanently soon but it doesn’t look hopeful if she’s asking when she can leave’

‘Well first of all, we love you just as much. I’m sure there’s an explanation’ you laughed ‘Maybe we should talk to her about everything. She’s only just turned three so she probably doesn’t really understand everything yet’ you told him and you felt him relax under you slightly. ‘You know she loves being here’

‘I know’ he nodded. ‘Maybe it’s best, let’s see what she thinks’

‘Was that your sly way of asking me to move in?’ You teased and even though he still looked unsure his smile made you feel a lot brighter.

‘Yeah, I suppose it was’ he laughed. ‘You know if Thea is okay with it, can we make this our house rather than just mine but you sleep over a lot?’

‘Are you sure?’

‘I just want us all together. You know like that family we were always meant to be. You guys sleep here most of the time anyway it’s not like much would change. You’d just have more of your stuff here’

‘And no place to escape from you’

‘Meanie’ he pouted but he knew it was all in jest.

‘I guess it makes sense. We can stop paying for a house no one’s ever in and you’d get to see Thea a lot more’

‘See, it’s a win for everyone’ he beamed. Taking your outstretched hand as you stood up and he nervously followed you into the living room where Thea was playing with her dolls house.

‘Thea baby, will you come over here for me?’ You asked, watching her put her toys down and come over. Reaching up so Mason would sit her in his lap and the smile he gave her because she’d picked him made you melt.

‘Me and daddy have been thinking it’s a good idea for us to all stay together from now on. What do you think?’ You asked her but she looked a little confused so you explained a little further. ‘So we won’t have my house and daddy’s house anymore, we’d have the same one and we can all go to sleep together and and wake up together and see each other every day not just sometimes, yeah? How does that sound?’

‘My toys’ she pouted, her eyes filling with tears immediately and you knew you’d have to break it down for her a little more. In her mind your houses were two separate things and if you were leaving that house then you were leaving everything that came with it there too.

‘We’ll bring all your toys here bubs. And your bed and all your other things that you want. We’ll just stay here now’

‘Where will daddy go?’ She questioned, small tears running down her cheeks that Mason wiped away quickly and you knew he was getting just as upset as she was watching his baby cry.

‘He’ll stay here too, munchkin’

‘All the time?’

‘Yes baby, I’ll be here all the time’ Mason chimed in. ‘I can read you a story every night now, not just a few times a week. And we can have our special breakfast in the mornings just the two of us still. That stuff doesn’t have to change you’ll just have one room not two’

‘No more bye bye’

‘No more bye bye, baby’ he told her. His eyes filling up as he realised that was what the issue was. The longer Thea spent with Mason the harder the goodbyes were becoming as she only grew more attached to him but he was quick to reassure her that was now a thing of the past. ‘The only time we have to do bye bye is when I have to go to a game. But I’ll always come back okay?’

‘Okay’ she told him. Dropping her lip as she reached for him so he could pull her into a cuddle and you melted at the way Mason held his arm out for you so you could join in.

‘We’ll go and grab all our stuff soon and bring it here, yeah?’ You told her. Both your faces close to each other on Mason's chest. ‘We can get you more sheets too so they match your room here’

‘Mummy, I like pink’’

‘I know baby but your room here is purple’

‘But pink’

‘I can make it pink for you sweet pea’ Mason chimed in. Clearly wanting to do anything for Thea to make her more comfortable in his house. ‘Nanny and grandad are here this weekend and I’m sure grandad will help me paint it when I’m back from my game’

‘Mase you’ll be exhausted’ you reasoned with him but he was incessant on giving Thea exactly what she wanted so she’d be happy.

‘I don’t care. It won’t take long if we all chip in’ he told you, kissing your forehead gently and it’s like you fell for him all over again seeing how he’d do just about anything for the pair of you.

‘Love you’ you whispered, eyes boring into his and he was quick to close the small gap and leave a quick kiss on your lips.

‘Love you’ he whispered back. The brightest smile on his face and it warmed you to know you were the cause of it.

Mason stuck to his word, coming home from his game on Saturday and getting straight to painting with his dad. You and Debbie offered to help to get it done quicker but Mason assured you they could do it so the pair of you got stuck into building some of the new furniture for her room instead. With all her stuff being here now she needed a bigger set of drawers and a new wardrobe and whilst the latter was being delivered the next day, the drawers were currently in pieces in the spare bedroom across the hall.

‘I’m just gonna see if the boys want a cuppa whilst you read over that’ you told Debbie. Knowing she wanted to read the instructions twice so she knew what was happening but you didn’t head into Thea’s room straight away. You could tell there was an important conversation happening that you didn’t want to disturb and just like usual your curiosity got the better of you and you stood outside trying to listen in.

‘Thanks for helping me with this dad’ you heard Mason say. ‘I really do appreciate it, I bet it’s the last thing you wanna be doing at this time’

‘You know I’d do anything for Thea’ you heard Tony reply and it warmed you to know she had such a supportive network around her. ‘I’m really happy for you, you know that right? I know this is what you’ve always wanted and yes you went about it a different way to most but I’m so proud of you and y/n for figuring it all out. Thea is such a special girl and it’s all down to you two’

‘Stop it, I’ll cry’ Mason joked, but you could tell he was a little emotional. Your own eyes stinging at Tony’s praise for all of you but you held your emotions in so you didn’t get caught. ‘Things have got a way of figuring themselves out and all I’ve ever wanted was this. I can’t tell you how lucky I feel to have them’

‘You don’t have to tell me, I can see it all over your face’ Tony joked and you used this as an in to check on them to ask if they wanted a drink. Mason popping a kiss on your cheek as he tried to not get paint over you but you were surprised to see how far they’d gotten already.

By the time they’d given it a second coat and you and Debbie had figured out the instructions to Thea’s new furniture it was nearly time for bed. Debbie and Tony taking themselves off to bed as they were so tired so the three of you got ready yourselves but the thought of Thea sleeping in a room of wet paint made you frown.

‘You’ll have to sleep with us tonight baby, your room won’t be finished until tomorrow okay?’ You told her but she nodded excitedly. The three of you having so much fun before going to sleep that Thea refused to sleep in there even after the paint had dried and the smell had disappeared. You tried everything you could think of to get her back in there but she would only seem to sleep in your bed for now and you were tired of trying but at the end of week two you let it slide for a while until the pair of you realised you really needed her back in her own room.

-

‘You still think it’s the best idea when she can’t sleep without us now?’ You laughed. Gripping his shoulders tightly as you felt his hands move to your bum.

‘Well I’m hoping Lew can convince her to sleep in her own bed when we’re not here’ Mason winked. ‘We’ve not been apart since you’ve moved in, maybe a a night way will do her good? Like Lew can make sure she sleeps in her own bed and then when we come back we’re more strict with her about it’

‘That could work’

‘We can’t have her in our room forever I’ll go insane’

‘How about we tell her we’ll come get her in the morning for cuddles?’ You suggested and you watched his face soften at your words.

‘You're such a good mum’ he whispered. ‘There’s me practically chucking her out on the street just so I can have you. Just shows you what this body does to me’

‘Oh hush up you melon’ you laughed, feeling him grip your bum again as he kissed your neck and you tried not to gasp at the contact.

‘Your melon’ he whispered, attacking your neck with more kisses and no matter how much you tried to wriggle away he just held you tighter. ‘Got me right under your sexy spell’

‘And to think I was too scared of what you’d think of me in the beginning’ you laughed, trying your fingers over his scalp and the low moan that left his lips excited you.

-

When Mason told you he was willing to wait until you were ready to be intimate, you didn’t realise how serious he was. And as each time you saw him went by your need for him grew until the third sleepover you were having at his where every touch of his set your skin alight. You’d been craving alone time with him for days and you’d told yourself this time you’d make sure the pair of you got what you wanted.

The night went the same as the others. Mason making the pair of you dinner before you got into bed and he was up to his usual tricks. Tracing your skin lightly with his fingertips over your ribs and even though you knew he ever meant anything by it as he always just liked to touch, but it turned you on more than anything else.

You knew Mason was waiting until you were ready however you had a fear of Initiating anything. You knew it was all on you though so you let him push it this time and melted into his hold as he grew braver with his hands. Your breathing was heavy and he was holding onto you for dear life so when you felt him prod you in the back you couldn’t help but let out a breathy moan.

You were more turned on than you could ever remember being, feeling safe and content in Mason's arms as he loved on you but as soon as his fingers tried to travel up to your chest you felt yourself go stiff.

‘What’s wrong sweetheart?’ He breathed, pulling back and laying you down so he could caress your cheek softly. ‘I told you, If you’re not ready I can wait’

‘No it’s not that’ you reassured him. Knowing you had to be honest with him even though you were absolutely terrified and knew you’d sound insane to him. ‘I don’t… I don’t look the same as I did back then, you know? I’ve got a mum tum and stretch marks and-‘

‘Stop talking’ he interrupted, kissing you heavily before pulling back to look you in the eyes. His face serious, causing you to gulp heavily before he started to speak. ‘All that stuff that you think you have, doesn’t matter to me. I’ve loved you this whole time, do you really think I care if you’ve got a tummy now?’

‘I don’t know’ you shrugged, feeling a little silly now he was spelling it out to you like this.

‘You carried my baby, do you not know how sexy that is? Do you not realise how horrically turned on I am just by the fact I was the last person to have you and now I get to have you again? You're so bloody beautiful and all I've wanted to do is worship you, you know? Kiss every single inch of you so no I don’t give a fuck if you look different cause you’re still my girl’ he reassured you, the words making your eyes sting but his cheeky smile let you know he wasn’t done making you feel better. ‘I’ve changed too you know’

‘Yeah, I've seen. You’ve gone from a teenage boy to a Greek god’ you laughed. Watching his face turn bright red but you knew he was trying to laugh it off as that’s not exactly what he was talking about. ‘I’m kidding. New tattoos too huh?

‘Yeah my collections grown a bit since you last saw it’

‘Can I see?’ You whispered and you melted at the way his face softened.

‘Of course you can’ he smiled, helping you up so you could get settled in front of him with your back to his chest before pulling his sleeve up to reveal his new collection. You’d seen pictures and a few flashes when he wore short sleeves but getting an up close and personal tour like this was overwhelming. Even more so when he removed his top to show you the dates just under his pec and his champions league trophy. ‘Oh and there’s one on the back of my neck too’

You were quick to get up and crawl around to see it and even though you had no idea what it meant you thought it looked sexy as hell.

‘What does it mean?’

‘Expect the unexpected’ he laughed and you couldn’t stop the smile stretching across your lips.

‘Fitting’ you giggled, gently reaching out so you could trail your fingers over it delicately. Watching his hair stand on end before you placed your lips to his neck and you felt him tense as a shuddery breath left his lips.

Mason was the king of physical contact and you weren’t sure if it was because he couldn’t see you but you knew you needed to hear that sound again so you pushed all thoughts out of your head as you carried on kissing him there. Feeling him melt into you as his breathing began to change and you knew you were turning him on you just hadn’t realised how much.

Within a flash he’d pulled you back round and into his lap. Hitting you with a bruising kiss whilst holding your face and you moaned into each other's mouths until you’d had to pull apart to catch your breath.

‘You know, you’re not the only one who’s got new tattoos’ you smiled bashfully. Watching his eyebrows raise but his eyes darken and you knew he wanted to see it right away so you carefully peeled yourself away from and laid down slightly on your side. Thankfully he followed suit and laid next to you and you watched as his eyes followed your fingers as you pulled the hem of your shirt up to reveal the left side of your ribs.

You heard a small gasp as soon as he’d seen it. His fingers reaching out to touch the small drawing that sat on your side just next to your boob and you knew you were covered in goosebumps from his simple touches. Feeling him trace the lines before his gentle voice broke the silence.

‘What is it?’

‘Sweet peas, Thea’s birth flower’ you told him. ‘It’s meant to look like a mother and a daughter, she’s the little one’

‘It’s so beautiful’ he told you. His voice sounding more emotional than it had a moment ago but you were too shy to look at him. ‘I wanted to get something for Thea but this blows all my ideas out the water’

‘Why don’t you get the same then?’

‘Really?’

‘Yeah, why not? It can be for the both of us’ you winked, watching his face soften as his eyes went back to looking at your side.

‘For my girls’ he whispered and the lump in your throat kept you from speaking. ‘So Thea’s a sweetpea, yeah?’

‘She is, and you’re a snowdrop’ you told him, watching him laugh but before you knew what was happening you felt his lips pressing featherlight kisses to the spot where your tattoo was. Your skin being covered in goosebumps almost immediately and even though his lips felt like heaven you felt yourself squirming around a bit, causing Mason to pull away from you.

You felt silly but it wasn’t just the fact your body had changed since he’d last seen it but also the fact the last time he saw you naked was the last time anyone saw you naked. What if you’d forgotten what to do? What if you were rubbish? ‘Im sorry Mase, I’m just nervous. it’s been a while’

‘I know, and I promised I’d take care of you, didn't I?’ He reassured you, moving you onto your side so he could look at you properly and the sincerity in his eyes melted you.

‘Yeah’

‘You know, I still remember how you like it’ he whispered, lips on your neck as he squeezed your waist and you could feel your insides quivering as he turned you on even further. His hands reaching round to grip your bum and you gasped before his lips landed on yours again, stealing the breath from your lungs.

When he laid you down on your back, you felt the panic rising inside you even further but you let him take off your shirt. Flopping back onto his bed to try and relax yourself but it was no use as you still weren’t feeling confident no matter how he was looking at you. Eventually covering your body with your arms as you avoided his eyes but you could tell he was starting to get unsure so he laid down in between your legs. Resting his head on your hip so he could press a few kisses there but you were as stiff as a board

‘Hey, it’s alright’ he whispered, reaching to the side to grab your shirt again before sitting you up and helping you put it back on but his lips were on yours before you could say anything back. ‘We don’t have do anything’

‘No I want to’ you pouted, crawling over and into his lap and your heart thudded at the adoring way he was looking at you. ‘I’m just a bit overwhelmed, you know? I wanna do all that stuff with you I just…’

‘You wanna keep your top on?’ He laughed, tickling your sides as he kissed your cheek and you nestled yourself into his neck.

‘For now yes’

‘What else can I do? To make you more comfortable’ he asked your eyes filling with tears at how thoughtful he was being. ‘We could dim the lights a bit lower, make it all romantic’ he teased with a smile. ‘Or just turn them out all together’ he offered, but you liked the sound of the first option.

‘Can we dim them?’ you whispered. Letting him jump up and dim the lights until they were barely on but you felt yourself relax instantly. Watching him come back to you slowly so he didn’t hurt himself before laying himself down next to you so you could face each other.

Clearly you were still too far away for Mason so he shuffled impossibly closer, his hands resting on your waist and you reached up to cup his jaw and pull him into a kiss immediately whilst tangling your legs together.

His hands began to wonder up and down your body until they dipped under your shirt. This time you let him carry on and the feel of his hands on your skin was like no other so when he finally got a hold of your bum you moaned into mouth which gave him a chance to trap your bottom lip between his teeth.

The next thing you knew he was pulling your thigh up and hooking it around his body, squeezing your flesh before his fingers danced across your core over your underwear and the sensation made you gasp into his mouth.

‘This okay baby?’

’Yeah, keep going’ you told him. Grinding your hips down so you could ride his thigh but he knew exactly what you wanted. Moving your underwear to the side so he could slip his fingers between your folds and the moan the left your lips was no match for the growl that left his.

‘You’re fucking soaked’ he breathed. Lips attaching to your jaw as he circled your clit and you could have almost cum on the spot from a mix of his touches and dirty words. Overwhelmed by everything about him but mostly the way he really had remembered how you liked it. Soft and slow to get you going but ready to give you his all when you were ready. ‘You want my mouth baby?’

‘Uh huh’ you told him, letting him push you onto your back so he could slowly move down your body.

It was crazy how much turning the light down gave you a heap loads more confidence but the ability to feel him better helped too. You could still make out his eyes and the shape of him but being able to let go of everything like you were doing felt amazing. Only matched by the first flick of his tongue that practically turned you to liquid.

You’d forgotten how good he was with his mouth. That was the one thing that stood out to you when you’d had sex the first time and you let him have his way with you as that familiar feeling travelled down your spine and into the pit of your tummy.

He didn't give you a second to recover when you reached your high and you couldn’t exactly blame him. Still just as needy for him and when you felt his tip at your entrance you turned to jelly.

He was easing you in slowly. Making sure you both got into a comfortable rhythm but you knew he was holding back as the moans poured from his lips so you moved your hips in tandem with his in hopes he’d speed up and thankfully he did. Giving you his all until he suddenly came to a halt but he kept himself inside of you.

‘Why’d you stop?’ You breathed, trying your hardest to make out the look on his face but it was a bit too dark to see.

‘Cause if I didn’t then it would have been over for me’ he chucked. Your face heating up as you caught onto what he was on about before he nestled his head into your neck. ‘You’re worried that I won’t be attracted to you anymore but I literally can’t control myself. This is what you do to me’

‘Don’t blame me’ you giggled but Mason was in the mood to tease you even more.

‘Oh but I will’ he uttered, lips dancing across your neck. ‘I’ve been waiting so long to have you it's like I can’t wait to get to the good part’ he laughed and even though you were still a little terrified you desperately wanted to see his smile. Thankfully you could just about reach the lamp on his bedside table and with one touch of its base the room was suddenly bathed in soft light.

It took you both a few beats to adjust to the light but as soon as you had you watched his eyes flash down to where the pair of you met before looking back up to your face.

‘You sure?’

‘Yeah, feels even weirder not being able to see you’ you laughed. Sitting up ever so slightly so you could attempt to pull your shirt from your body and thankfully Mason helped. His dark eyes all over you as you laid yourself back down but you were reaching up to pull him down for a kiss soon after.

‘You’re insane’ he whispered against your lips. Letting his own travel down your body so he could kiss over your chest whilst his hips began to move again and you knew you’d be done for soon.

Getting to watch him as he made love to you was something you didn’t realise you needed until right now. Watching his muscles dance under his skin as he moved turned you on more than you thought it would but Mason couldn’t take his eyes or lips off of you until the pair of you were over the finish line and he collapsed on top of you gently.

He was paying attention to every single part of yourself you’ve always tried to ignore. Kissing over the slightly faded purple lines on the sides of your tummy and chest and paying attention to all your lumps and bumps. Whilst only a few moments ago the thought of Mason seeing you fully naked terrified you, you took comfort in his touches and let him explore you as he’d wanted to for months.

‘You know your body is perfect, don’t you?’ He told you quietly but in the silent room his words hit you hard. ‘Like I think I’m even more attracted to you now. You’re so soft and smooth and like you grew a whole ass human in here’ he laughed. Hand resting in your tummy. This time you didn’t want to push him off though. ‘Not just any human either, our human who’s just my favourite person and I’m so bloody grateful for you like I can’t even explain it but you’re perfect and I’m gonna tell you everyday. Even when you finally believe me I’ll still tell you cause I never want you to forget’

‘Oh, Mase’ you breathed, your bottom lip wobbling as his words sunk into your skin but he was quick to kiss your tears away and hold you close to his body. Letting you know you were safe and feeling more content than you ever had.

-

‘Mummy!’ You suddenly heard being shouted from down the hall. Thea’s bounding steps following her shouts and you quickly jumped away from Mason just in time for her to find the pair of you.

‘Hey sweet pea, did you have a good nap?’ Mason asked, picking her up and sitting her on his knee and she cuddled herself into him straight away whilst nodding. ‘That's good. Listen, Uncle Lew is coming to visit next week and he wants to know if he can come for a sleepover just the two of you. You’d like that, right?’

‘Yes please’ she nodded enthusiastically, clapping her tiny hands together in delight and the quick wink Mason sent your way gave you butterflies.

Mason promised he’d figure it all out and book everything he needed to for the pair of you and as it grew closer to the day he was getting more handsy by the hour. The pair of you still couldn’t do anything about it though, Thea kicking up a right fuss unless she was in between the pair of you and you felt like you were about to burst but you pushed through knowing you and Mason just had to be a little more patient.

When the day finally arrived, you spent your morning getting yourself ready whilst Mason was at training and as soon as you’d picked Thea up from nursery you got set to making her and Lewis their favourite snacks for them to eat that evening whilst you were away.

‘Where are my two favourite ladies’ you suddenly heard Mason call through the house. His voice getting louder as he walked towards the kitchen and you turned the hob down so you could give him your full attention.

It only took a few seconds for him to appear. Rounding into the kitchen with a huge smile on his face but it was the big bunch of pretty pale pink carnations that your eyes went to next.

‘Well, here's one of them’ he smiled, placing the flowers on the side so he could pull you into his body and leave a heavy kiss on your lips. ‘You alright?’

‘I’m fine’ you chuckled, letting him pull away so he could grab the bouquet and hand it to you. Your cheeks heating up instantly and you could tell he was laughing at you a little bit. ‘What are these for’

‘No reason, just saw them and realised I haven’t bought you any in a long time. I know these ones are your favourite’ he winked and you felt yourself blush deeper.

‘Thank you, Mase. They’re beautiful’

‘Not as beautiful as you’ he whispered. Capturing your lips again in a heavy kiss but you couldn’t deepen it too much as the sound of Thea running into the kitchen made you pull apart.

‘There’s my other favourite girl’ Mason cheered. Bending down to her level so he could pull her into a hug and soon enough he was lifting her and settling her on his hip before reaching back over to where he’d placed your flowers originally.

You didn’t see them at first, too caught up in Mason to notice whatever else was going on but when he reached for a smaller bunch of the same flowers he’d gotten you, you felt your eyes well up.

‘Here you go, baby. Couldn’t leave you out huh? Got you some to match mummy’s’ he told her. Handing her the small but perfect bunch and you could have melted on the spot. Thea’s eyes going wide as she took them from him before she got shy and hid her face in his neck but you could see her smile from a mile away.

‘I’ll find you a nice vase Thea, we can put them next to mine if you like’

‘Yes please mummy. Thank you daddy’ she giggled. Holding onto them tightly as Mason walked her over to the sink and helped her arrange them in the little vase you’d found before carrying them into the sitting room to live next to yours. Thea following behind with her bright smile ever present at the fact she had her own flowers from her favourite man.

Lewis turned up shortly after and she was quick to show him her flowers that she was very proud of. Letting the pair of you quickly put a bag together and once you’d let him know their dinner was ready in the fridge you were ready to head off.

You tried to ignore Lewis’s silly smile as he waved you off with Thea at the doorstep but you knew you were blushing which Mason only made worse as he attacked your face with kisses before backing out and onto the street.

‘So where are you taking me then, Mount?’

‘Got us our own place for the night. Thought we could make dinner together and chill for a bit like we used to’ he told you. Popping his hand on your thigh so he could give it a gentle squeeze and the coy smirk he sent your way made your insides flutter.

The apartment he booked was at the top of a high rise with far reaching views over Manchester and as soon as you were in and settled he was pulling you out onto the balcony. A bottle of something sparkling in an ice bucket and you watched him carefully pour you a glass before handing it over.

‘Wow Mase, you’ve gone all out huh?’

‘Only the best for you’ he winked. Raising his own glass so you could toast before taking a sip. ‘C’mere’ he whispered. Pulling you into his body gently so you could hold each other whilst looking out at the view.

The discussion turned to how the pair of you couldn’t believe you were finally on your own again for the night and how you hoped Lewis could convince Thea to sleep in her own room but standing in Masons arms as you looked at the sun setting made you feel at peace and you were glad you got to spend this time together.

‘With how quick we managed to make Thea I’m surprised there's not another one on the way’ Mason joked suddenly, fingers tickling your sides and you had to hide your head in his neck before your mouth seemingly ran away with you.

‘Is that what you want?’ You asked, noticing him squeezing you a little bit tighter before he tilted your chin up so your eyes met.

‘Another bestie? Of course. I definitely think it’s on the cards for us in the future. You’re like the best mum in the world, of course I’d wanna have more kids with you’

‘Well if I’m the best mum then you’re definitely the best dad’ you told him. Trying to deflect away from his sweet words but he just scoffed at you to try and deflect himself.

‘Not sure I believe that’

‘Why not?’ you pouted, not liking the way he didn’t believe he was good enough.

‘I just wish I was around more, you know? Yeah it’s great getting to do the fun stuff but nothing makes me happier than the normal stuff. Like coming home to you two and seeing how happy Thea is to see me. Bed times and bath times every day like that’s the stuff I wanna do’

‘Mase, you know Thea thinks the sun shines out your arse right?’ You laughed, causing him to giggle as he kissed your forehead gently. ‘I know that’s the stuff you wanna do and I know it’s not possible to do it every day but Thea knows you give her everything you can and that’s what makes you the best dad’ you told him sincerely, noticing how emotional he’d gotten about it and you knew you wanted to make him realise he had nothing to worry about. ‘You know when I knew you were gonna be the best dad ever?’

‘When?’ he laughed, fingers smoothing the back of your hair and you felt yourself melt at the gesture

‘When Thea had just been born and we were staying with you. Remember that night I just lost it? Like I completely broke down and thought I couldn’t do it?’

‘I remember’ he sighed. ‘Broke my heart seeing you like that I just wanted to make it all better for you’

‘Well you basically did, you were the only reason I was able to keep going’

-

You knew being a new mum would be exhausting but it was really starting to get to you now.

You were just under two months into being a new parent and whilst overall Thea was a good baby she was starting to struggle to sleep at night and in turn you had started to lose your head.

You had been staying with Mason so you could share the responsibilities and help each other out but it was a critical part of the season so you didn’t want to bother him too much so you’d bore the brunt of most of it lately. Thea slept with you in your room so Mason was always well rested for training and games but he’d been away for a few away games meaning you had to look after Thea completely your own for a little bit.

It had all got too much for you one night though. Thea wouldn’t stop crying and at this point neither could you. Holding her to your chest and walking her up and down your room in hopes she would settle but nothing was working and you’d tried everything.

You weren't expecting the door to suddenly fly open and Mason to be looking back at you a few moments later. He was meant to be away until the morning and you only started crying harder at the sight of him as you buried your face into the side of Thea’s so he couldn’t look at you. A feeling of shame suddenly taking over you that he’d seen you like this as you wanted him to believe you could do this.

‘Hey, what’s going on?’ He asked sympathetically but you were in no state to answer him right now. Letting him pull the pair of you into his chest for some comfort and even though you were embarrassed you felt yourself relax knowing you weren’t on your own anymore.

‘She’s won’t settle down, she won’t sleep so neither can I and she won’t stop crying’ you sobbed into his chest and you felt him squeeze you that little bit tighter and place a kiss to your head.

‘Its okay, love. Come on, let's sit down’ he told you, walking you over to the bed and sitting next to you ‘pass her here, yeah?’ He whispered, taking Thea from you and resting her on his chest before tucking you under his other arm. ‘It’s alright, don’t get upset. I’m here to help now. What do you need?’

What did you need? A shower? Food? Five minutes peace and quiet?

‘I don’t know, my heads all over the place’

‘Why don’t you hang out in here for a bit, yeah? I’ll take Thea for a while and you can have a sleep or a bath or whatever you want. Have you eaten?’

‘No, I wanted her to settle down first’

‘Okay well I’ll go make you something-‘

‘You’ve only just got back, Mase’

‘Exactly, I’ve been sitting on my arse for hours’ he joked. ‘Just let me take over for a bit and you can have a rest, okay? No arguments’

You reluctantly agreed. Letting him know you were probably going to take a shower and with a quick kiss to your forehead he was walking out with Thea comfortably in his arms.

‘Hi baby, have you been a good girl for mummy? Yeah? I think you’re lying’ he teased as he rounded out the door and you felt like crying all over again at how good he was with her.

You spent way longer in the shower than you intended to but it was needed and you felt a lot fresher when you got out. Falling asleep for 20 minutes on top of your sheets before you got changed and met Mason downstairs who was sat on the sofa with Thea’s head cradled in his hand. Her body laid across his arms so she was outstretched and they babbled together in the language only they could speak.

‘You need to teach me your ways’ you told him softly, frightening him just a little before he sent you a smile as you took up a seat next to him.

‘Babies are like dogs, they smell fear’ he laughed She knows you’re tense so she’s probably a bit on edge too. Why don’t I take her into my room tonight so you can get some sleep?’

‘I have to feed her at midnight, it’s fine I got it’

‘You sure?’

‘I promise. And I feel a lot better now, thank you’

‘Okay well if you need me at all just come and get me please? You’re not on your own remember’ he told you. Repositioning Thea so she was cradled in his arms before wrapping an arm around your shoulder to pull you into his side.

‘I know Mase, thank you’ you told him. Your eyes stinging slightly but you held your tears back as he kissed your forehead and looked back down at Thea still asleep in his arms.

‘It’s okay. You’re not superwoman and no one’s expecting you to be’ he whispered but all you could do was nod. ‘I’ll have her all of tomorrow, yeah? I've missed the little pickle and you need a break so i'll take her out and you can have the day to yourself’

‘What if someone sees you?’

‘I’ll take her to Chilly’s, he’s been moaning at me all weekend that he wants to see her so you can have the house to yourself’

‘Are you sure?’

‘Of course’ he confirmed and with one final kiss to your head he rested his cheek on the crown of your head. ‘There’s food in the microwave for you’

‘Thanks Mase, for everything’

‘It’s my job as Daddy’ he laughed, squeezing your shoulder gently as you laughed along with him and you knew it that moment you’d always be fine.

Once you’d been fed and it was getting late, Mason walked you to your room and got Thea settled in her cot before saying goodnight. Letting you know he was just across the hall and you could come and get him at any time but you didn’t want to disturb his first night back in his own bed.

Thea woke up 15 minutes before she was due her feed and you used that time to give her a little talking to. Letting her know that you were the mummy and you were in charge but you knew she had no idea what was going on. Babbling and gurgling away like usual and when you finally got her in your arms to feed, she wouldn’t latch on properly and you could feel yourself getting more anxious but the second.

‘Come on Thea, be good for mummy please’ you whispered, trying to relax back into the headboard as much as you could and even though you were trying your hardest not to cry, as soon as she began to sob you couldn’t hold it in anymore. Crying as quietly as you could as you tried to get her to settle again until a few taps at your door snapped your head up.

‘Y/n? Is everything okay?’

‘Yeah’ you croaked, sounding more upset than you intended to and you felt your bottom lip wobble and you tried to hold yourself together.

‘I’m coming in okay’ he told you gently and you only had a second to cover yourself before he was carefully pushing open the door and making his way over to the pair of you. ‘My girls are all upset again huh?’ He smiled as he sat in front of you on your bed and you gave him a half hearted smile as you nodded your head. ‘What’s wrong, love?’

‘She won’t feed, I’ve been trying to get her to latch on and she won’t do it’ you told him quietly. ‘The harder I try the more she won’t do it and-‘

‘It’s okay, it’s okay’ he interrupted. Placing a hand on your arm as you looked up into his kind face. ‘I’ll help, yeah?’

‘I don’t know-‘

‘Y/n, you have to let me help you remember?’

‘I know it’s just..’ you trailed off. Looking down at your chest but Mason seemed to be able to read your mind.

‘If you’re worried about me seeing things, you know I’ve seen it all before right? That’s kinda why we’re sitting here with a crying baby’ he joked and you couldn't help but give him a smile but as you attempted to pass Thea over so Mason could feed her, but he stopped you in your tracks. ‘Keep hold of her, just move forward a bit’

You did as he said, moving away from the headboard but the last thing you were expecting was for Mason to slide in behind you and rest your back up against his chest. One hand settling on your waist whilst the hand that was on the same side as Thea he brushed against her head softly. Clearly Mason really did want to help and not take over and the thought made your heart thump.

‘Just relax okay, you got this’ he told you, lips closer to you ear than you realised before he was slightly leaning his head over your shoulder to talk to Thea who was still crying in your arms. ‘Hey little one. I thought we spoke about this earlier. You’ve got to be good for mummy so she can feed you. You’ll feel a lot better if you just let her and then no ones gotta get upset, huh?’ He spoke to her, massaging her head softly and as the moments went by she started to calm down.

‘Now, we’re gonna all relax and take a deep breath’ he told the pair of you, the smile in his voice evident as Thea looked back up at you both with wide eyes. ‘We're gonna go again, okay? But we’re gonna be calm this time. We’re gonna lean back a bit’ he told you, pulling on your shoulder gently to get you to relax back into him and you followed his lead until you were completely resting against him. ‘And you’re gonna open that mouth nice and wide for me Thea, that’s it, that’s a good girl’ he encouraged, tickling her cheek before you attempted to help her latch on.

It still took a few tries, Thea still having a mini strop each time but with Mason's reassurance in your ear you didn’t want to give up and soon enough Thea was feeding away peacefully in your arms.

‘There we go. I knew you could do it Mumma’ he whispered in your ear before resting his chin on your shoulder so you could look down at Thea together. A wave of emotion hitting you harder than ever before and even though you took a few shakey deep breaths in you felt the tears spill over from your eyes.

You knew Mason knew you were crying when he pressed a gentle kiss to your shoulder and then to your temple. Wordlessly trying to let you know it was okay and you were doing well but you still felt like a failure. You should be able to feed Thea on your own but lately it felt like you couldn’t do anything without Mason's help and it was starting to really get you down.

When Thea was finished you covered yourself back up before you attempted to wind her and once she was done she was growing sleepier by the second.

‘Can you just take her a sec? I just need to pop to the loo’ you told him. Carefully passing Thea to him so you could run to the bathroom and splash your face with cold water to calm down.

By the time you returned, Mason was laid on his back with Thea asleep on his chest as he stroked her back lightly. Him offering you a soft smile that you returned but you weren’t quite sure what to do next until he opened his free arm out to you and you knew he was asking you to come and lay with him.

You shouldn’t have felt as awkward as you did, before Thea was born the pair of you often found yourselves cuddled up so you could talk about the future but with the way you were feeling about Mason right now and the way you felt about yourself had your head in a spin. The comfort of Mason was the only thing on your mind right now though so you laid next to him. Head on his chest as he wrapped an arm around your waist and when you opened your eyes you saw you were practically face to face with Thea who’s tiny hand was reaching for yours.

You smiled as she gripped your pinkie, her eyes falling heavier until she was sleeping peacefully on Mason's chest and the three of you stayed there quietly for a while.

‘Penny for your thoughts?’ Masons whispered, wanting you to express how you felt but even just the thought of talking made your tears come back thick and fast.

‘I’m really trying my best but it’s all going wrong. I’m not good enough-‘

‘No no no, I won’t have that’ he told you gently before pressing a quick kiss to your forehead. ‘Things will be tough sometimes but you’re never not good enough, okay?’

‘Okay’ you whispered but it wasn’t enough for Mason for you to just agree with him.

‘Tell me, tell me you're good enough’ he laughed whilst squeezing your side and you couldn’t stop the giggles from spilling over.

‘I’m good enough, Mase’

‘I know you are. You’ve been looking after her solo for a few days and you’re probably just exhausted. Everything seems worse when you’re tired but I’m back now and you can have a proper rest okay?’

‘Thank you’

‘It’s alright. We’re a team, remember?’ He told you before looking back to Thea. ‘Gonna whip this one into shape tomorrow’

‘I think she’s just tired like I am. It’s been a rough few days’

Without another word, Mason quickly untangled himself from you so he could place Thea in the cot next to him before turning back to you. Arms wide and he invited you into his body and without a second thought you cuddled yourself into him.

You needed a big fat ugly cry and you knew he knew you needed it too so when he wrapped his arms around you, you let yourself go. Basking in his warmth and comfort as you cried yourself to sleep.

-

‘I remember waking up next to you in the morning and you were so embarrassed’ Mason teased and and you rolled your eyes at him playfully.

‘Well yeah, I spent all night crying into your chest, I thought you’d think I was mental’

‘Of course I did’ he laughed, but before you could say anything back he was back to being sweet. ‘But I loved you then, and I love you now and I told myself I’d always take care of you. If that’s what you needed back then, my shoulder to cry on, that’s what I was going to be’

‘I love you too’ you whispered. Face breaking out into a wide smile as you watched his face soften before dropping a soft but delicious kiss to your lips.

‘I don’t think I can wait till after dinner’ he told you, hands trailing down your back until he got to your bum where he gave it a cheeky pinch. ‘We’ve got all night right? If we start now it’ll give us time to recover before we go again’

‘You’re terrible’

‘And you are too sexy for your own good’ he winked. Kneading your bum gently and you felt your legs go weak.

‘Go in, I’ll come find you in a sec’ you told him and with a final kiss and a gentle tap on your bum he let you go. Leaving you on your own so you could look out over the skyline and thank your lucky stars you ended up where you always wanted to be.

Thank you so much for reading 🩷 I’d really love it if you could leave me some feedback and met me know what you think 🥰

[ereardon]

Friends Don't || Chapter 2

Summary: Bob Floyd has been your best friend for almost a decade, ever since he quietly agreed to tutor you in college. The two of you have spent years chasing each other around the globe – Bob as a WSO, you as a travel blogger. You’ve always been the anywhere-but-here girl, and he’s been your rock. But when a surprise diagnosis threatens to crumble your picture-perfect life, you’re on the first flight back to San Diego, desperate to put down roots for the first time. Will Bob finally have it in him to admit that you could be the love of his life? What will he say when he finds out the secret you’ve been skillfully hiding from him? Or worse, what if he doesn’t find out until it’s too late? 

Pairing: Robert “Bob” Floyd x OC [Reid] 

Tropes: Friends to lovers

Warnings: Cursing, mention of doctors/illness/crashes, illusion to death, blood

WC: 2.1K

Series masterlist here; previous chapter here; next chapter here

“Got everything you need, Sunny?” 

You turned around. Bob was standing in the doorway to your room, wearing a pair of blue striped pajama pants and a white t-shirt that hung off his lean frame. You smiled and nodded. “Think I’m good for the night at least.” 

Sitting down on the edge of the bed, you crossed your bare legs and looked around the room. It was a mess. You were waiting on the rest of your stuff to get shipped from your Brooklyn apartment where you had been living for the last eight months, so all you had were the two suitcases that you’d taken on the plane, now spread out on the ground, their contents spilled across the hardwood floors. 

“Thanks for letting me stay,” you said quietly. 

Bob tipped his head. “Don’t have to thank me, darlin’. It’s your house now, too.” 

It was a sweet little two bedroom house, only a fifteen minute drive from the beach. But it was sparsely decorated. Your room had just a bed and a dresser, no art, no rugs, no lamps. “What are your thoughts on letting me redecorate, in that case?” 

He laughed. “What, you don’t like my style?”

“Bachelor chic? You’re about one step above a 20-something guy in Bushwick who has his mattress on the floor so that he’s closer to the Earth but the reality is that he has fifty dollars in his bank account so when he asks you on a date he takes you to his sweaty roof in July and plays shitty guitar music and tries to mansplain to you the difference between IPA and other beers.” 

Bob raised an eyebrow. “Tell me you haven’t actually met guys like that.” 

“Unfortunately, I’ve met every single kind of guy you could ever imagine.” 

“Well, if my options are Brooklyn douche or you redecorate, by all means Sunny, do whatever you’d like with the place. I’ll leave my credit card on the kitchen table.” 

You stood up and crossed the room. “No way. It’s on me. I want to do this for you. Make a nice house so one day you can have some lucky girl over and she won’t get the immediate ick when she sees that you still have gray sheets and brown towels.” 

“What’s wrong with gray sheets?” 

You shook your head. “Trust me, Bobby.” 

“Sure, honey,” he whispered. You took one step closer, wrapping your arms around him. Bob immediately folded you into an embrace, resting his chin on your shoulder. 

“I missed you so much,” you whispered. “Thank God you’re home safe.” 

“Were you worried about me, Sunny?” he asked quietly, his low voice rumbling.  

“I worry about you every fucking day,” you murmured into his chest. “When you’re flying and I don’t know where you are. When you’re on the ground somewhere far from wherever I am. All I can think about is the next time we’re going to talk. The next time I'll know for a fact that you’re safe. And then that call comes and I’m elated. But it has to end sometime, right? So when it ends, the second you hang up, I’m back to being worried about you.” 

Bob pulled away, his hands folded into yours. “You worry too much, Reid. I’m always gonna be here for you. Always have been.” 

How could he forget? There was a reason you were scared all the time. You had almost lost him to the skies once. 

You were living in San Francisco and Bob was stationed out of Lemoore. It was the closest the two of you had ever lived since you graduated, four years prior. 

That’s when you got the call. 

“Reid Coleman?” 

You sat up straight at your desk chair, looking out the window over Market Street. If you really craned your neck, you could see the Ferry Building. “This is.” 

“I regret to inform you that Lieutenant Robert Floyd has been in an accident. You were listed as his emergency contact.” 

“Oh my God,” you whispered, heart plummeting in your abdomen. “Is he OK?” 

“He’s sustained injuries, ma’am,” the person on the other end of the line said. 

You didn’t even register that the phone had fallen from your grasp until you heard it drop to the floor at your feet. You were out the door in a second, practically barreling down to the lobby of the building, fingers shaking as you tried to search for rental cars nearby. 

The three-and-a-half hour drive went by in an instant, and it was the longest car ride you had ever been on. Every single second all you could think of was the fact that Bob could have died out there. 

And that the last thing you might have said to him was that you hated him. 

By the time you arrived on base it was dark. You barreled through the hospital doors, panting as you made your way to the nurses station. “Robert Floyd?” you asked, panicked. 

“And you are?” 

“His emergency contact.” 

The nurse nodded. “Follow me.” 

You trailed after her down the hallway, the clacking of your high heels on the linoleum floor the only noise in the sterile hallway. 

She stopped in front of the door. “He’s intubated,” she warned you. “So he can’t speak.” 

You nodded and she opened the door. But you weren’t ready for what you saw. Bobby, lying there on the bed, with a thick clear tube sticking out of his throat and mouth, taped to his lips, the whirring sound of the machines as they kept him alive. The way he practically blended into the white linens of the bed he looked so pale and fragile. 

You collapsed onto a chair next to his bed, taking his hand, the one that didn’t have an IV in it, into yours, letting your salty tears fall onto his cold skin. 

“Bobby,” you whispered, voice thick with tears and pain. “Honey, I’m so sorry. I didn’t mean it. Please, Bobby, come back to me.” 

He stayed in a coma for three days. You spent nearly every waking moment at his bedside, watching him with bated breath, waiting for some semblance of life to overtake him because the boy lying there in that hospital bed was not your best friend. He was a stranger. He didn't look or feel at all like the boy you had come to love over the last seven years.

And then, on the third day, you heard a familiar voice. 

“Sunny?” 

It was dry and scratchy. That morning the doctors had taken out the intubation and said he was awake, and you had rushed over from the hotel. There were tears in your eyes as you bolted through the doorway to where Bob was sitting up in bed, his glasses settled on his nose, a slow pinkness coming back to his rounded cheeks. 

You bent in half over the edge of the bed, sobs wracking your body, silent tears streaming down your face. Bob reached out one hand, softly patting your hair. “Honey, don’t cry.” 

You pulled away, looking up into his familiar blue eyes. He had looked so small before, and that had terrified you. He looked like himself again. Like the Bobby who had picked you up and carried you halfway across campus when you accidentally stepped on a rusted nail and had to go to the ER. He looked like the Bobby who had dared you to go into the caves in Vietnam even though you were terrified of small spaces. He looked like the Bobby that you loved with every cell in your body. 

He looked like your Bobby again. 

“I thought I lost you,” you whispered. 

“Never going to lose me, darlin’,” he murmured back. 

You sniffled, gripping his hand. 

Bob’s eyes widened after a moment. Then, “Wait. Where’s Denver?” 

You raised your eyes to him, unable to say it but knowing that they could convey what had happened without words, and watched as your best friend fell apart right in front of you. 

***

“OK Floyd, spill.” 

“Spill what?” Bob asked, tossing down a hand of cards. Payback laid his cards down. Two pair. He grabbed the pile of chips in the middle of the table and slid them closer, stacking them up with his own poker chips. 

“About Reid, Floyd,” Phoenix said, exasperated. “These two boneheads,” she pointed at Hangman and Rooster, “want to know if she’s fair game.” 

“Hey!” Coyote pouted. “So do I.” 

Bob shook his head as Fanboy dealt a new round of cards. “She’s not my girlfriend, if that’s what you’re asking.” 

“So we can ask her out,” Hangman was practically salivating. “Cause she’s hot as fuck.” 

Bob raised his head and glared at the blond. Hangman put his hands up in a defensive maneuver. 

“Woah, chill Floyd.” 

“She already turned you down, Bagman,” Phoenix chimed in. 

“She didn’t turn down Rooster,” Payback pointed out. “Or should I call him Chicken Man.” 

All eyes turned to Bradley, who took a sip of his beer. Then, “Never said I was gonna ask her out.” 

Bob sighed, trading in three cards from the five card draw. “Sunny is an adult,” he said. “She can do whatever she wants. So Rooster, if you want to ask her out, you’re free to. It’s up to her if she says yes or not.” 

Bradley nodded, tossing out one card, waiting for Fanboy to deal him a replacement. “Maybe I will.” 

Bob pursed his lips, grabbing for his beer glass, taking a chug and then slamming it down. He didn’t realize how forceful he was until the glass shattered on impact in his hand, sending beer rushing over the table and down the sides. Everyone jumped up in a panic. 

“Shit, baby on board, what the fuck?” Hangman called as he rushed to grab a roll of paper towels. 

“I’m sorry,” Bob shook his head. “I didn’t mean to.” 

“Come here,” Phoenix said, grabbing his arm and tugging him into the kitchen. She held his hand over the sink, pulling out a small splinter of glass from his palm, running the bloody hand under water. She doused it in soap and he winced at the sting. 

“Thanks,” Bob said as Phoenix wrapped his hand in a clean dish towel in Hangman’s kitchen. 

She looked up at him, knowingly. “You can say no to them, you know.”

“Don’t know what you’re talking about.” 

Phoenix sighed. “Yes you do. Reid. You don’t want those idiots to touch her.”

Bob grimaced. “She’s a big girl. If she wants to go out with them, she can.” 

“Just admit it,” Phoenix said. “She is more than just your best friend.” 

Bob’s blue eyes bore into hers. “Sunny is, and always will be, the love of my life. I’m just not hers.” 

***

You looked through the sliding glass door to where Bob was carefully peeling an orange at the kitchen table, his eyes glued on the TV hanging over the mantle. 

“Ms. Coleman, have you found a new physician in the San Diego area? If not, I can recommend one to you. But it’s imperative that you go in for new scans immediately.” 

You sighed. “I’m working on it.” 

“Ms. Coleman.” The voice on the other end of the line was hard. “This is no joking matter.” 

“Don’t you think I’m aware of that?” you hissed. 

“I’m going to email you a list of five physicians in the area.” 

“They’re going to say exactly what you said,” you whispered. 

“You need to get a second opinion. And either way, you need a local physician now that you’ve relocated.” 

“Fine,” you said. “Send me the names.” 

“Ms. Coleman?” 

“Yeah?” 

“Please make an appointment.” 

You clicked off the phone and slid open the door. Bob had moved to the couch, one arm slung over the low back. 

“Everything OK?” he asked. 

You nodded, walking around the edge of the couch and settling into the spot next to him. Without even thinking, you leaned into Bob’s side, letting his arm fall around your shoulders, tucking you into his side. 

“Sunny?” he asked softly. He read you like an open book. He could practically see the anxiety and tension radiating off of your skin. 

“I’m fine,” you whispered, looking up at him with a small smile before resting your head against his thigh, lifting your feet onto the other end of the couch, lying down so that Bob’s hand was now firmly pressed against the dip in your side where your ribcage ended. 

You closed your eyes, breathing in his familiar smell, letting yourself relax, feeling your heart rate slow. 

“Everything is going to be fine,” you murmured.

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[the1975attheirverybest]

Girlie we need education pt.3 I’m begging 💳💥💳💥💳💥💳💥

Well, you know I can’t say no to you. So, here it is. Lesson #3: Pain is NOT the opposite of Pleasure

Warning: smut

—-

Amelia paused at the restaurant door for a moment trying to find the courage to go in there. Her clammy hands reached for the door handle. She focused her vision on the “pull” sign, trying to stay calm.  Ever since the last time that she and Matty slept together, she’d tried her best to avoid him. It wasn’t too difficult. Mostly because he’d been traveling around the country, doing interviews and promoting the band, appearing on radio shows and in magazine articles. So, it didn’t take a lot of effort to not be around him. But he was back now, and she had to see him and be around him all night. She told herself that she didn’t care; that he’d made his feelings quite clear, and that she’s an adult who can handle rejection. He’d drawn his boundary and she has to respect it. But, for some reason that she couldn’t quite articulate, she’d chosen to wear this dress for him. And now that she was about to walk into the restaurant, she felt foolish about it. 

She took a deep breath. You can do this. You can do this. You can do this. Just have a good time. The boys are gonna be there. It’s gonna be fine. 

She walked in, squeezing through the group of people waiting for a table at the front, and looking around for her people. She spotted George by his tall figure and bright hair. He’d brought Charli along, too. Jamie was there. Dan, Ross and Adam, a couple of people from the label, and, of course, Matty. 

“Hey guys” she made a general greeting, everyone at the table turning towards her. 

She made a deliberate choice not to look in Matty’s direction. First win of the night. So, she didn’t notice that he’d gotten up from his seat to get her a chair and set it next to his. She sat at the other end of the table, next to George. 

Dinner seemed to go smoothly. In fact, for brief moments, whenever she was talking to Adam about his baby, or to Charli about her work, she’d almost forget that she was sitting a few steps away from Matty. Or that she’s supposed to be putting on a nonchalant act. Inevitably, though, she would find herself glancing in his direction every time she heard him speaking, or laughing at something that someone else had said. Or leaning over the table to talk to George. She’d hoped to catch him looking at her, but it never happened. She expected herself to be relieved. Not to have to look into his beautiful brown eyes and fake neutrality. But, a piece of her was always disappointed. She hated that about herself. Whether it was desperation or a desire to hurt him the way that he’d hurt her. She didn’t want to be petty and vindictive. But it was hard not to. 

“Right, I think it’s time for me to head out.” Jamie spoke, looking around the table. “You two have to be in the offices early tomorrow.” He nodded at George and Matty. Matty downed the last of his drink, setting his now empty glass down and wiping his mouth on the back of his hand. “Mhm.” He nodded. 

“So don’t have too much fun tonight.” 

“No fun for me, thank you.” Adam said, bowing out. “Gotta get home soon. Dad stuff.”

“Yeah, none for us either.” George added. “Charli has a thing tomorrow. I gotta finish up at the studio and go with her, so I can’t get shitfaced tonight.”

“Wow…are we saying we’re all going home at a reasonable hour?” Ross laughed. “We’ve really gone and grown up , haven’t we?”

Matty’s face dropped. “It would appear that we have, yeah.” He spoke, a hint of regret in his voice. 

“I’ll get the tab, then.” Jamie left his seat. 

Matty pulled out his phone, scrolling through his texts to find the thread that led to his last hookup. His finger hovered over the last text. He looked up over the table at Amelia, then back down at his phone. 

People had started to leave the table and disperse in different directions. He needed to make up his mind quickly. He watched her stand up and hug George goodbye. 

He sprung to his feet to catch up with her. He walked behind her as everyone lined up to leave the restaurant. When George and Charli headed off in their own direction, it was now just the two them. He stepped to the front to stand by her side on the pavement, looking straight ahead at the cars as they drove by. “Hey.” He mumbled. 

Her heart raced in her chest and she wondered if he could hear it. Slowly, she turned to look at him. He was, as always, perfect. 

His curls fell beautifully around his face, his simple black sweater clung to his body, a charming smile lit up his face. He’d been looking healthy lately. It always warmed her heart. 

“So….dinner was fun.” He stated, digging into the pocket of his jeans for his cigarettes. “It was, umm, nice to see everyone. We’ve all been doing our own thing for a bit.” He lit his cigarette. “Want one?”

“Nah. When are you gonna quit that disgusting habit anyway?”

His lips curved into a smile, tilting the cigarette to the side. “Hmm….someday?” He shrugged. “You heading home?” He blew the smoke out of his mouth, obscuring her view of his beautiful face.

“Yeah, guess so. You?”

“Yeah.” He nodded. “Walk to the station together, then?”

“S-sure.” Just when she thought she’d managed to get through the night without embarrassing herself. 

***

“Why’s the train so crowded? Is there some….some political protest or some football game I don’t know about?” She squeezed closer to him to make room for the flood of people getting on behind her. 

Matty shrugged. “Wouldn’t know. I’ve been so disconnected from the news, lately.”

“Probably should’ve just got an Uber.” She muttered under her breath, looking behind her at the packed car. No seats whatsoever. 

“Wanna just….get off at the next stop?”

“Umm, no, no. It’s fine.” She sighed. 

It was decidedly not fine. Every time the train had to pause in the tunnels or come to an abrupt stop, the standing passengers lost balance. Herself included. The first couple of times, Matty steadied her with his firm grip, making sure she doesn’t fall. Then, she clung to his arm a few times, looking up at him and trying not to sweat at the sight of his pink lips so close to her face. Eventually, and she has no idea how, Matty had wrapped his arm around her, holding her close to him as his other hand held on to the metal poll in the center of the car. Keeping them both balanced. She could smell his cologne. The drink he’d had. The cigarette he’d smoked. She could feel his soft sweater against her cheek. She knew he could see her face, which, no doubt, betrayed all her secrets. 

Matty’s eyes weren’t on her face, though. He was looking somewhere further down. At the way the cut of the dress highlighted her breasts. Or was it the bra that did it? He didn’t care much for that how. She glanced up at him, catching him looking. “Umm…you, look- nice dress.”

She smiled. Men can be so blind sometimes. “Thanks.”

“Is it new?”

“This? No. Not at all.”

“Well, umm” he felt his mouth go dry. “It’s - n-nice.”

***

“So, umm, that’s my stop coming up.” She loosened her grip on his chest, moving away to get closer to the door. 

“Right, yeah. Have a good night, I guess….” Matty’s lips parted again, the look in his eyes felt serious, but as the automatic doors opened, she looked back, and he was silent. Letting her walk out onto the platform.

On the streets, she felt her body shake as she sprinted towards her home. She didn’t think she could take another second in that train, packed like sardines with him so close to her. Looking, smelling, and sounding so good. 

Over the echo of her own footsteps, she could still hear his voice faintly in her ear. The way he’d smile when she would turn to look at him. The way he’d say her name…

“Amelia!! Yo! Waiiiit! Amelia! For fucks sakesss!!”

She turned around. She wasn’t imagining things. In the distance, she saw Matty running towards her. 

“Finally! Is this how you normally walk or are you in hurry for something?”

“W-what are you…” she looked down at her waist to check that her purse was still attached to her. Has she forgotten something? Her phone maybe?

“I- umm, it’s late. You shouldn’t be walking home alone in the dark.”

She frowned. “Since when are you….such a gentleman?”

“It’s not about bein’ a gentleman. It’s purely about safety. Have you read the statistics lately?” He was feeling his confidence act begin to crumble, so he looked ahead, beginning to walk again. 

“No, have you?”

“A man can’t walk his friend to her door safely without an interrogation now? What a sad world we live in.”

She giggled, shaking her head. “Well, thanks, Matty.”

They walked in silence for a while. Each of them desperately trying to think of something to say to the other without making things more awkward than the silence. 

“So,” she spoke, smiling playfully. “Would you, like, fight off gangs for me? Robbers? Do you have a ninja knife or something hidden in your back pocket?” She laughed. 

“Fuck off.” He rolled his eyes. “I’ll have you know, I’m very strong now!” He flexed his arm, pretending to show off. Or maybe a small piece of him wanted to show off. 

“Yeah, I- I’ve noticed.” She cursed herself in her head as soon as the words slipped her lips. She was losing the upper hand her. God. She hated those kind-games. Those conversations they’re having in order to say what they can’t say. What they won’t say. Trying to communicate without actually communicating. She found that shit exhausting. She was never any good at acting cool and collected. And in this case, she didn’t want to be. She wishes she could just…talk to him. 

“You’ve noticed, huh?” Matty raised an eyebrow, looking at her out of the corner of his eye.

“Oh, got over yourself, Matty.” She rolled her eyes. “I mean, like, I noticed in the way that…you know- people notice. If your friend gets a haircut or loses or gains weight or whatever. People notice, okay!” Nope. She’d overdone it. By, like, a lot. 

Matty watched her face contort itself in embarrassment, laughing softly. 

“Shut up.”

“What? I haven’t said anything.”

“Well, don’t.”

“Whatever you say, Amelia.”

***

“You wanna come inside?” She turned to face him, fumbling with her keys. 

“I mean, sure, if- you’d like me to. If it’s not too late.”

“I believe the conduct manuals say that when a gentleman risks his life to walk a lady home, etiquette dictates that she must offer him a nightcap.”

“Well…if that’s what the manuals say… wouldn’t mind a glass of wine, actually. 

***

“How’re you doing with- uhh- our lessons.” He felt sleazy just saying it.

She set her glass down to avoid looking surprised by his question. “W-what do you mean- I- what?”

“I mean have you been practicing? Sucked anyone off yet?”

“What the fuck is that matter with you!” She shoved his arm lightly, mentally noticing that, he has, indeed, grown some muscles. 

“What?” He giggled. “Just inquiring about your progress.”

“No, I haven’t. Yet.” She folded her legs, sinking back into the couch. “Have…you?”

“Haven’t had the time. But I’m free tonight….if you wanna brush up on some stuff.”

“I see. So the gentleman act has ended. Alright.”

***

In the dim light of her bedroom, she stood by the foot of the bed, with Matty towering over her. 

For the second time tonight, she found herself unable to take her eyes off his lips. “Friends don’t kiss, friends don’t kiss, friends don’t kiss…” she repeated the mantra over and over in her head until Matty’s head dipped down and he kissed her, crashing his lips against hers with just a little bit of force, his hands holding onto her hips. 

When he pulled away, her hand reflexively flew to her lips, as if grabbing at the lingering feeling of his mouth. She was utterly speechless. 

Matty stepped away for a moment, taking off his sweater. 

She mumbled a curse when she saw his shirtless chest. 

“Pardon?” He turned to look at her and smiled knowingly when he saw her eyes wide open. 

In the back of her mind, she wondered if she’s ever seen him naked before, or if she’d simply never noticed that he was this attractive. 

“Oi! Eyes are up here.” He joked. 

She was too overwhelmed to think of a clever comeback. His silence alarmed him. 

“Hey, Mia, you alright?” His thumb and index finger touched her cheek. 

“If you’ve had a change of heart, we don’t have to.”

“It’s umm, it’s been years since you’ve called me ‘Mia.’” She whispered. 

“Has it?”

What did it mean? Why did he suddenly bring that nickname back? Was he trying to tell her something? Does he genuinely not remember? “No, I’m fine. I wanna do this.”

“You sure?” He tucked a stray strand of her hair behind her ear. 

“Y-yeah. Umm. Yeah I’m positive.”

“Alright, then. May I undress you now?” He looked into her eyes, smiling. 

“I - can-“ her hand grabbed searched behind her back for a zipper. 

“No, no. Please. Let me.” He walked around in a semi circle to stand behind her. “This gorgeous dress? want to peel it off your body myself.”

She felt her cheeks burn up. Perhaps this dress was the right idea after all. 

Matty gently pushed her hair to one side of her neck to find her zipper, causing her skin to prickle with goosebumps. His lips kissed the bottom of her neck where it meets her shoulder softly. Her eyes fluttered shut. Her breath getting caught in her throat. 

But the kiss ended a bit too quickly for her liking, she heard the zipper travel down her body and felt the dress loosen around her, dropping in a pool at her ankles.

Matty bent down to pick it up. “Step out for me…good girl.”

Shit. They’d barely done anything yet and she was already desperate for him. 

With the backs of her knees against the bed, Matty dropped to his knees running a finger over her clothed crotch and making her gasp. 

“Matty-“

“Let me start by reminding you of the last thing we did.” She saw a faint smile on his lips before her eyes closed and she melted at his touch again. 

“Already wet?” He clicked his tongue. “Needy, baby.”

She let the slightly embarrassment wash over her. Driven away by the waves of pleasure that his expert fingers were giving her. 

“Right. Take these off for me.” He tapped her hip, snapping out of the blur she’d fallen into. 

She did as he said, eager to get his hands back on her as quickly as possible. 

Silently, Matty took both her wrists, placing her hands on each of his shoulders. “Hold on tight, yeah?”

She nodded. “Yeah, yeah. Okay.” Almost moaning. 

His lips wasted no time finding her center. She almost yelped at the feeling of his tongue licking into her. She felt his hot breath against her as he let out a small giggle at her reaction. This wasn’t just fun for her. He was taking delight in the way he made her feel. 

“Matty- oh! My god…”

It seemed he’d already memorized all the perfect motions and spots that got her going from last time. It was like he knew exactly what to do and when to do it. 

“Fuck! Matty- I’m- ah, if you don’t- s-stop, I’m gonna-“ without thinking, or intending to, her hands found his hair, pulling harshly and moving his mouth away from her. 

“Oh my gosh! I’m so sorry. I didn’t- I didn’t mean to. Umm… are you okay?”

Matty laughed, shaking his head. “Don’t apologize. It’s fine.”

“No it’s not, I practically took off a chunk of your gorgeous hair. It must’ve hurt!”

“Yeah, but, I liked it.”

“You…did?”

“Yeah, yeah. Pain and pleasure….mix well sometimes.”

He could see by the confusion in her eyes that she’d never felt that particular mixture. “You’ll see.” He winked. 

Was that a threat? A dare? A preview of things to come?

He placed a small kiss to her wet cunt, to give her a little tingle, causing her to lose balance and lean on the bed behind her. 

Matty crawled into the bed, hovering on top of her. “See, that’s why I said to hold tight.”

“S-sorry.” She whispered, feeling small as she looked into his eyes above her, his curls dangling and creating a bit of shade over both of them. 

“It’s alright. Kinda ready myself. If…you are? Wanna keep going?”

“Mhm…condom?”

He reached into the back pocket of his jeans, pulling his wallet out. “Got it.”

As she watched him unbuckle his jeans. the thought that they were about to have sex kept running through her head. She waiting for it to be weird. To be surreal. For her brain to remind her that Matty’s her friend. Friends have no business getting this intimate. But none of that came to mind. All that she was thinking about is how good he’d finally feel inside her.”

“You good?”

“Yeah, yeah.” She looked into his eyes. “You?”

He smiled. “I’m really great, baby.”

She felt him get closer, then slowly push into her. Her eyes closed reflexively and she held her breath. Matty noticed her whole body stiffen. His own mind struggling to remain focused at the feeling of her around him. “Umm, no, Amelia. Open your eyes for me, please?”

It took her a second to muster the courage, but she did. “That’s better. I promise you, it’s gonna feel so much more pleasurable if you relax, yeah?”

“S-sorry, I-“

“You nervous or something? It’s okay. Trust me. Breathe. Yeah. That’s it. You’re doing so well.”

She hasn’t really thought about to before. That she tended to clam up when a guy thrusted into her. Maybe it was the anticipation. Or the nerves. She just did it without thinking. 

Matty pushed the rest of the way into her and let out a moan that surprised her. She’d have thought he was the quiet type. 

“Fuck- y’feel so good, Mia.” 

His overwhelmed face suddenly disappeared, he looked down at her. “Felt that. Praise girl, huh? Noted.” He laughed. 

“Shit!” She felt the knot in her stomach tight as he pushed particularly deep. “Fuck, Matty, I- you’re so- feels good.” He smiled, his own mind hazy with pleasure. “Right, ready to take it up a notch?”

He rested his weight on his forearms, settling into a rhythm with his hips. Leaving her a moaning mess underneath him. Chanting his name, begging for nothing in particular, letting him know how good she feels. 

“Cum with me, yeah?”

She nodded, lifting her head off the bed to kiss him. 

Matty waited carefully, at what he hoped was just the right moment, he dipped down and lightly bit her shoulder as she unraveled around him causing another wave to hit her, her body trembling around him as her mouth hung open. 

She swore she almost blacked out for a second. With Matty placing small kisses all over her neck and body as she came down from the aftershocks. 

Slowly, he collapsed on top of her. His thumb reaching for the bite mark on her shoulder and rubbing it soothingly. “See? Told you. Pain isn’t the opposite of pleasure.”

Her blurry eyes fixed on the ceiling, her chest still panting, she ran her fingers through his hair. “Guess not.”

Matty took a deep breath, rolling off of her. “Ready for round two?”

[rexxdjarin]

SPEAKKING OF BOBA THOTS I FORGOT TO SEND YOU THIS ONE THIS MORNING

(i think it could also work for wolffe but mainly boba)

somnophilia (maaaaybe free use—for wolffe 👀), waking up in the middle of the night/really early morning pinned to boba’s chest, he’s got an arm barred across your chest holding you by the shoulder as he fucks your thighs

he just keeps you in that blurry half awake dream space just making the both of you feel good until one of you gets more desperate and he makes you beg him to fuck you back to sleep 🤭

AHHHHHHHHH ok you have inspired me 🤭 and it’s gonna be boba bc I miss him my daddy

Sunlight just peeking over the horizon hits your face as it paints the indigo night sky with the soft pale pink of dawn. It was already warming up. You could feel the heat on your bare skin, the haze of humidity starting to flood the bedroom from the open balcony archway.

Before you could open your eyes, a dull rocking shifts your body forward like the billowing air tides across the dune sea. A grumble fills your ears as you begin to come to, feeling warmth radiate across your entire backside. You tried to turn over, but felt the restraint of a muscular forearm against your pebbled nipples.

“Don’t move, little one. Got you right where I want you.” Boba huffed softly, the whispered words hot along the shell of your ear. He groaned deeper as he let his other hand pull you by your hipbones impossibly closer to where his hips were lazily snapping to meet yours.

“Hmm…Boba…what…” You drawl softly in your half-asleep daze, reaching down to entwine your fingers with his on your hip. Before you could finish your thought, you felt the hot, weighted length of him press between the plush of your closed thighs. You gasp delightfully, widening your thighs just enough to let him move with an enjoyable amount of friction.

The subtle throb of his morning cock found it’s home slotting itself just below your own entrance, brushing at your clit gently with each thrust. You let out a desperate mewl at the contact and began writhing in rhythm with Boba’s hips.

“Looked so pretty laying there. I can’t help it, princess. Daddy’s gotta have you.” Boba whispered, placing the laziest of long, hot kisses at the spot behind your ear that always made you melt. “Watching the suns paint your silhouette across my sheets as they rise over my city…you’re mine too, aren’t you?”

His thrusts increase in strength without ever changing the pace. The mounting intensity along your drenched slit without the relief of entrance has you boiling in your core as you ache for the stretch of him inside you. In the daze of morning, you were powerless to resist such teasing. You moaned louder now, the whispered sweet nothings across your pillows no longer enough to signify your need for him.

The deep grumble of a satisfied laugh spread across your back as it echoed in his broad chest. “All you have to do is say it. Tell me you’re mine. Beg me to fill you and I’ll make that ache go away.” He instructed, letting his soft kisses turn into sloppy, desperate hickies on the length of your neck. Still the thrusting of his thick cock between your thighs didn’t let up, his hands traveling to knead at your thighs.

“Fuck.” You whimpered, tipping your head back onto his shoulder and crying out as he slid himself between your soaked slit now.

“C’mon, little one,” he mocked, keeping his composure despite your heat threatening to envelope him in seconds. “Use your words. Let me hear that pretty voice so early. Wake up our city.” He laughed darkly as he let the tip of his cock slap against your clit and you lost it.

“Boba. Fuck me. Please. I’m yours, Daddy, all yours. Please.” You begged at full volume, rocking back into his lap and gripping his hands desperately. You were slick and ready and if you waited even a second longer you’d explode.

He groaned loudly, shifting his palm down your upper thigh. “There you go, my Princess. Now you’ve earned it.” He purred, lifting your leg higher and splitting you apart on top of him.

He took you like that into the late hours of morning, letting you fade back into blissful sleep with every climax and waiting to wake you up again each time for another round.

[chocolatecake47]

Rayla is like: 

Watched her parents leave “I watched you leave"/"Stood there and watched you walk away, from everything we had”, - them being gone/missing for most of her childhood (“but when will you be back?”) “Skies grew darker, currents swept you out again, and you were just gone and gone, gone and gone”- Their ghosting/outcasting “Cause I honestly believed in you/Holdin’ on, the days drag on" - Her trauma and stigma around her parents betrayal slowly isolating her from everyone “My friends from home don’t know what to say”

Coming on a mission of vengeance and murder at only 15 years old and choosing to change the narrative (“My heart for Xadia!/Say the word and I’ll go back into that tower with you!”) “People look at me like I'm a monster"/"I brought a knife to a gunfight"/"when I fought you used to tell me I was brave” - Fighting her father for people she doesn’t know just because its the right thing “they strike to kill and you know I will"/"you had to kill me but it killed you just the same” - Getting ghosted herself and literally being able to travel all over the world and go anymore but not the place she grew up in “And I can go anywhere I want, anywhere I want, just not home” - Believing in her core that she’s not good enough even though she did the right thing, believing everyone is right to be disappointed in her (“they’re right to reject me! I’m never good enough and I never will be!”) “I had the shiniest wheels, now they're rusting"/"They used to cheer when they saw my face, now I fear I have fallen from grace”  - Truly believing that her pain is irrelevant “I know my pain is such an imposition” because she thinks she doesn’t matter “Always taking up too much space or time”, - Expresses surprise over being loved because no one has ever been so open about it or loved her in her hardest darkest moments “starry eyes sparking up my darkest night"/"Rare as the glimmer of a comet in the sky, and he feels like home” - Thinking she has to defend her parents honor and die because of their supposed failure (“All of this happened because my parents ran away, so I have to stay and defend the dragon queen”) “Ghosts from your past gonna jump out at me”/“Remember how I said I’d die for you?”- Thinking it is her job to save everyone without letting anyone be there for her but it always ends up being more complicated “Never a clean break, no one here to save me”

The war finally over, everyone thinking things were finally ‘calming down’ but she was distracted, stressed, looking for closure, her mind kept reeling until her body finally did as well “Clearing the air, I breathed in the smoke”, - Waking up from nightmares with the reality of 3 of her parents being dead crashing over her and holding strong to that sacrificing mentality ("They said that, sometimes, we make sacrifices so that the ones we love don’t have to. It’s part of protecting them”) “I wake in the night, I pace like a ghost, the room is on fire, invisible smoke, and all of my heroes died all alone, help me hold on to you”, Waking from horrible nightmares that Viren has done something to Callum which results in her leaving before he can leave her “I wake up screaming from dreaming, one day I’ll watch as your leaving, and life will loose all its meaning, for the last time”, Desperately wanting her logic to be understood ("Please Callum, this is about who I am") "You say, “I don’t understand,” and I say, “I know you don’t” - Had such a fear the world would divide them it tore at her inside until she couldn’t bear it “I loved you in spite of, deep fears that the world would divide us” - Leaving without telling him  (“Don’t follow me, and don’t look for me {I have to go}.”) “Left Cornelia Street before you even knew I was gone” - Her self-sabotaging brain thinking that despite the love the last two weeks have given her she still wasn’t deserving of good things, and she had to leave because thats what they (meaning her family) did (“But I can’t let you stop me, Callum. No matter how much I want to. I wish I could say that we will see each other again, but I don’t know if we will.”) “Don’t pretend its such a mystery, think about the place where you first met me”, - Believing she’s a burden and her parents aren’t Callum’s problem to deal with/she’s not Callum’s problem to deal with anymore (“from doing what I know I have to do. Leaving.”) “I’m not your problem anymore”, - desperately hoping that he doesn’t hate her even though she’s hurt him, because she thinks she’s doing the right thing by building an illusion to protect him (“Please don’t hate me when that illusion fades, Callum.”)“Never wanted you to hate me” - desperately hoping he’ll still trust her and want her after “Will you forgive my soul when you’re too wise to trust me and too old to care?” - Searching everywhere for any trace of Viren, any trace of what happened to her parents to make the wound stop bleeding “Trace the evidence, make it make some sense, why the wound is still bleeding” - the thought of Callum being something that got her through her hardest times alone “And when I was shipwrecked, I thought of you/When it was real enough, to get me through" - the idea of coming home to Callum & Ezran being the only thing keeping her going “And I just want to run to you, And every time I don’t, I almost do”,

Not knowing what to say, not knowing how to turn up empty-handed after two years, not knowing what to do to make things better, but only knowing that she is falling apart and is goddamn trying her best and she needs him (“All day I’ve, I mean, all week really, I’ve been so nervous and kind of edge-frazzled, you know?”) “And maybe I don’t quite know what to say, but I’m here in your doorway; I just wanted you to know that this is me trying”/“Standing in front of you saying, “I’m sorry for that night”, - The part of her brain that is mean to her thinking its justified if Callum doesn’t want to be with her anymore after what she’s done “So if the chain is on your door I understand” but deep down her heart wants him to say that it wasn’t her fault and everything will be okay and they will be best friends again and that he understands her twisted logic and forgives her for it “Tell me that you’re still mine, tell me that we’ll be just fine, even when I loose my mind/tell me that its not my fault, tell me that I’m all you want, even when I break your heart” - knowing that she has a lot of trust to rebuild with a lot of people “There are so many lines that I’ve crossed unforgiven” -resulting to wait forever, offering to put his heart back together, and promising to never leave again, “I want you for worse or for better, I would wait for ever and ever, broke your heart, I’ll put it back together” because he is the best thing that ever happened to her and the best thing thats ever been hers even if she is realizing it and admitting to it a little late (“the best thing I ever had: you”) “You are the best thing thats ever been mine”.

Long story short the world screwed her over and over and over again. She was the prey so much she quickly had to become the archer in order to survive.

PS. I didn’t want to tag every song cuz then it gets launched into a whole different side of Tumblr, but if you’re wondering where I pulled lyrics from they are all listed under the cut in (hopefully) chronological order (even though I did repeat songs a couple times but not lyrics!)

Haunted 

This Love

White horse

Your on your own kid

Castles Crumbling

Call it what you want

Mad woman

My tears ricochet (this song is so Rayla/Runaan-coded omg)

You’re loosing me

Tolerate it

Long story short

Ours 

False God

Breathe

Daylight

The Archer (this song is also so Rayla-coded)

Anti-Hero

Dancing with our hands tied

Cornelia Street

Getaway Car

Exile

Hits different 

Evermore 

I almost do (Rayllum-coded for sure)

This is me trying

Back to December (this is the most Rayllum-coded song I've ever heard)

Afterglow (i pulled the whole bridge from here basically)

How you get the girl

Mine

[chayannecraft]

hey the last drawing will probably be uploaded tomorrow!! i know you'll understand but i've been very busy today :)

anyway i'm curious about if the other eggs have any sort of role in your au??

OH and if you want to talk abt what chayanne and phil's relationship is like, i've been very curious about that lol bc it seems like phil's both very protective of him and doesn't care about him that much. not saying you haven't thought it out i'm just eager to look more into his character!

Hello!! Yeah no I understand I’ve been super busy too. Finals season and everythang. It’s a curse. Oh my god. (Which is why im so late answering this ask hello omg!!!) But anyways yes hello oh my god questions!!!! 💖💖💖!!!!! YES!!! I WILL ANSWER

The other eggs have very loose roles but they do exist!! They sort of take up the space of the descendants-of-the-champions roles that Sidon and the others fill (although I’m not sure who is who at the moment, would have to think about that a little more!!) (I have no idea what role Tallulah plays, but I think she might be traveling around with Wilbur, more info on that later) but sometimes they’re also just like, normal random kids. They are all friends I promise. I don’t have a lot on them though so this is not that coherent.

CHAYANNE AND PHIL. WOUGH BOY. THIS IS A LONG ONE

You were right in that Phil is very protective of Chayanne!! I think a part of him knew Chayanne was The Chosen Hero, but when faced with the decision to send him off to what very well could have been his sons death, if not horrific trauma he was like um. No lol. Not doing that.

A consequence of the storyline in general is Phil isn’t very mentioned a lot, so it gives off the idea that he’s uncaring towards Chayanne, but I promise you that’s not the case!! (Not to make fun of you or call you out of course). Phil is actually very loving towards his son, and was devastated when he ran away with the Master Sword.

Then (for reasons I haven’t thought up yet) he’s pretty distracted but desperately trying to get his kid back. Until the calamity happens and they fail. Then he’s under the impression his son is just dead and he’s in mourning for the next 100 years (Why is he still alive in 100 years, you ask! Well! I took everything from these kids and I think taking their parents is a little bit too cruel so everybody is blessed by some sort of god that expands their lifespan a couple hundred ok :D!!!)

And then a little bit after botw someone goes to Philza and is like hey. The hero is back. He’s hanging out with Princess Pomme. He looks a lot like the missing hero from 100 years ago. Your son. Might be your son Phil. And Phil basically takes 3 seconds to process this before clawing himself up from his depression and being like OK. WE’RE GONNA GO GET HIM!!! AND IF ANYBODY TRIES TO STOP ME IM MAULING THEM. Of course he gets to hyrule RIGHT as totk plot starts and Chayanne goes missing so kind of an L BUT THEY DO REUNITE!!!

They get their moments. They also get a really tearful reunion where Chayanne is like dad im so sorry for running off oh my god :( I forgot you for a hundred years you must be so upset with me. And Philza is hugging him like oh my god my kid is ok. Oh my god. YOU’RE GROUNDED FOR THE REST OF YOUR LIFE WHAT THE FUCK. And then just caries him around. And probably has some sort of beef with Missa because that’s Chayanne’s Hyrule-Dad. Meanwhile Pomme stands in the back ready to kill him if he makes one wrong move.

There’s a side story kind of sequel relating to that where Pomme and Chayanne have to grapple with the fact that Chay is also a prince and his dad misses him dearly and wants him to come home but they don’t want to be separated ever for the rest of their lives. Maybe even some parent bonding. Like a little family-person drama to contrast the cursed-destiny-supernatural-calamity drama and probably some Death Family Bonding.

[scarisd3ad]

You’re the greatest thing we’ve lost

Part of the to the end and back series

A/n - not really anything to do with Daryl or the apocalypse but a little world building so let’s travel back 6 years to when reader first left for college.

Summary - deciding to leave your family to move out of the small town you grew up in and to the city for college was a hard but necessary choice.

Masterlist

Taglist

With a sigh, I and my granddad finally finished packing the last bit of my belongings into the back of his pickup truck. Going to college was a tough decision, and although my grandparents would have loved me to stay back, help on the farm, and maybe work at a restaurant in town, I had my heart set on becoming a doctor. It was also a good idea. I wanted to be more than a mom, or a farm hand. I wanted to provide for my family if I ever decided to start one, and being a doctor would do just that.

“You’re not mad at me, are you?” I asked, brows furrowing together as I stared down at the cross necklace that adorned my neck. One that ended up in a drawer two months later because I decided ‘I just didn’t believe anymore’. Maybe it was because I finally could think for myself when it came to religion.

“Why the hell would I be mad at ya?” Granddad asked. I shrugged. “Dunno just- because I’m leaving,” I whispered as my arms crossed over my chest. “You need’t leave honey, need to be better than your grandma, and I,” he whispered. As tears welled up in my eyes, I nodded in agreement. The thought of leaving and never being able to return left me feeling anxious. I had the biggest dreams, but what if I was just not able to accomplish them because of my attachment to home? “What if I miss you?” I whispered. He grabbed my hand in both of his and caressed it with his thumb. “Then we’ll come out and see ya, honey”

“What if I miss home?” he sighed as he let go of my hand “Then ya can come visit, everythin’ will be alright” I nodded, Maybe everything would be alright. Perhaps I could handle it, but the thought of going to college still made me nervous. Although it was only an hour or two away, my entire life was going to change. I would have to make new friends, sleep in a new bed, and attend new classes. No longer would I be in my small town with the same 50 people in all my classes.I would no longer be sleeping in my childhood bed with my little brother no more than 2 doors away. There was going to be more than a room between my brother and me, which was something I had never experienced. “yeah” I whispered. “Everything will be alright” I added. I walked over to my brother and threw my arms around his shoulders in a tight hug.

He was only a couple of years younger than me, so this was the beginning of the end for us as we knew it. In a few years, Matt would go to college and then we’d both move to different states or towns. Then we’d only talk to each other on the phone or at Christmas and Thanksgiving. That happened to my mom and her sister, so who said it couldn’t happen to us? I desperately didn’t want that to happen. I wanted my brother to live in the room next to me forever.

“I’m gonna miss you,” I whispered as I buried my face in his shoulder. “Me too,” he whispered as his arms wrapped around my torso. “I love you so much, Matty,” I mumbled. His left hand begins to rub small circles into my back as he grumbles a quiet “Love you too” he was too embarrassed to admit how much we both loved each other; he was a typical teenager when it came to expressing his love for his family. “don’t steal my room” I giggled as I blink back tears, “I will” he said as a laugh vibrates through his chest. I slapped his arm as I pulled away from the hug. He had gotten taller than me during the summer between his freshman and sophomore years of high school, so now I sadly had to look up to even speak to him. “I do love you Matty” he rolled his eyes. “don’t call me Matty,” he murmured. Matty was his baby nickname. The nickname we’d coo lovingly when he was a baby and toddler, but now we just called him in moments like this or when we wanted to tease him. Despite his annoyance around the nickname, he’d always be Matty to me.

“My baby, my Matty!” 2-year-old me screamed when my mother tried taking newborn Matt away from me. He had always been my baby, even when I was 4 and teaching him how to talk. Or when I was 7 and walked him into his first day of kindergarten, he held onto my hand with a backpack 10 times his size on his back. And even now, when we were 18 and 16, I was going off to college and probably wouldn’t see him for months. He was still my baby. “don’t be a jerk, Matty,” I whispered as I shoved his arm teasingly. “I love you too,” he whispered as his arms crossed over his chest and his cheeks turned red with embarrassment.

Even though none of his friends were here, he still was so embarrassed to show love towards his sister. “Just come visit sometimes, okay? Don’t want you went for long” I nodded. I didn’t expect to stay away for more than a week. I knew I’d probably be right back in this driveway next weekend doing the same thing. “I won’t promise.”

“I’ll call you when I get to my dorm, k?” he nodded. “Yeah okay” I watched as his eyes pool with tears. Crying was not common for Matt; I don’t think I had seen him cry since he was 12. “I’ll miss you,” he muttered as he blinked back tears. “a lot...May-maybe I can go to Georgia State too and we can share an apartment when I move up there,” he whispered. I smiled as tears pooled in my eyes as well. “Yeah, t-that would be cool.”

Taglist

@rivversin @soul4death @furiousheartpoetry @silicone-bonez @nezukos-number1fan @your-shifting-gurl @maziejay08 @oi-itse @rhaenryawhore @kimbunnysstuff @blipblopper @ramielll @ilyhannah @daryldixonnn @delicatebearpandaopera @crypticmushroom @daryldixmedown @duckybird101

[vernfernn]

i don’t think i’ve ever told anyone this but like, during one of my first Skyrim play throughs, i was working up to build Lakeview manner. Lydia was my companion for the majority of the beginning, and she followed me around literally everywhere. holding all the materials i was hoarding, fighting my battles for me (i was new and inexperienced), and generally doing all the heavy work and getting literally no reward.

and when i say holding all my materials, i mean all my materials. all my good gems. my stone. clay. other miscellaneous ingots and bs i was never gonna look at nor use. countless dragon bones, scales, cast iron pots, ingredients and potions i “may need someday”.

she followed me everywhere, fought dragons, went missing when i ran from the dragons, disappeared when i started getting the hang of the game, and i never really bat an eye until i was at the half finished house and several dragons spawned in to attack me (i always fast traveled and that kind of triggered a dragon to always spawn whenever i got to the house) and was constantly screaming for her because i was low level and had no idea what i was doing.

“LYDIA WHERE DID YOUR SWORN TO CARRY MY BURDENS ASS GO IM GETTING FLAMED ALIVE IN FRONT OF A DEAD MUDCRAB!”

anyways

she also was there for when i became thane of falkreath and followed me when i painstakingly tried to figure out who i was supposed to do quests for to become thane.

i remember going into some sort of cave to find a journal for the priest of arkay only for it to be infested with the draugr (my sworn enemies at the time because they freaked me out) and she ended up getting locked out of the boss fight.

she got stuck behind a door while i sniped those idiots from a distance and somehow did not get spotted.

anyways, after building up all the wings for Lakeview (with spotty interior decor) we went to a mine so i could get a bunch of iron because i needed nails and hinges for my basement.

we finally get home and of course—a dragon decides to attack. again.

and i’m fighting for my life here, trying not to die and reload my quick save from literal hours ago.

and lydia thinks this is the perfect time to ask to be my steward.

with fire literally raining down from the heavens, burning my character alive, i hastily say yes without even realizing what she was asking for, and go into the offensive to put down this habanero lizard and steal its soul. classic hot girl shit.

she, me, and rayya (the housecarl you get when becoming thane of falkreath) fight this damn thing and kill it within literal minutes (i felt so proud of myself for not struggling during this fight.)

me later realizing i don’t have a follower behind me anymore when i fast travel to falkreath to buy more building materials for my house. the entire time i was wondering if Lydia glitched again (she got stuck behind a wall in ustengrav before and during that fetch quest for that one priest so i decided i would backtrack once i finished buying building materials to furnish my house.)

i teleport back to my house and almost immediately see lydia walk around like she owned the place. it was then i realized she wasn’t my follower anymore, and i assumed that my game had indeed glitched so i go up to her to see what the problem is or to recruit her again.

que lydias talk screen having the options to decorate my house when i talk to her, and i realize what happened. i immediately have second thoughts when i hear how happy she is about being my Steward and i feel guilty for wanting her as a follower again. so i just leave her there along with like 15k gold to furnish my house.

i also have a housecarl as mentioned before: rayya. and as i’m playing (and marrying some lass from riverwood for the money and literally nothing else because i was DESPERATE to have the house fully furnished.)

i eventually realized it was a bit odd that there where three women living in one house under one roof along side two kids and a husky and other small creature. (it was either a rat, bunny, or mud crab i do not remember.)

que me replaying this character a several more times and keeping up the tradition of having Lydia as a steward for Lakeview and Rayya as another household member but never adopt any kids or marry again because i’m now a master at scamming vendors in the game. plus the kids were annoying, and always ungrateful, and always asking for cash or gifts (none of which they were ever grateful for).

as the years progress i grow attached to my character and start creating a small story for him because we have a lot of history and i got attached.

i’m then wondering how i would explain Lydia and Rayya.

it hits me.

lesbians.

they’re married and employed by a really cool landlord who also happens to be the prophesied savior of the world.

they simply live out their years in a big house with the best scenery and local necromancer to keep them company. once tasked to follow and guard a guy who could yell really loud, now living out in the woods with an early retirement.

now in my head they are married and live in the big ass house with a cool husky, some chickens, a cow, carriage, horse, bard, and the occasional giant on its way to absolutely murder the chickens and cow whenever he stops by. classic cottagecore—warrior—lesbian story.

que me going through the house to see if there would be enough beds for everyone.

minus the one in the wing i used to create a primary bedroom, there’s another bed for two people upstairs. in my mind that bed is theirs and they’re married

lydia kept one of my amulets of mara my first play through when i agreed to let her be my steward (she kept a lot of my stuff, and i was unable to get it back because i felt too guilty taking the one thing she seemed to like). ((also i tried pickpocketing her but failed every single time)).

i grow genuinely attached to this idea and can never keep Lydia as a companion when it comes to getting my house furnished and feel a sense of pride when i’m reuniting her with her one true love.

anyways, that’s the story of how i came to love two completely unrelated characters and no one will understand my attachment to them. i love them so much and want them to be happy.

they’re married, idc

[animatorweirdo]

Return To Home

You finally leave for home, and show your excitement to Maglor after finding him along the way.

Warnings: leaving, packed with a lot of water, mentions of heat stroke, Saeros being snarky as hell, insulting each other, reader gets pissed off the final time, throwing and spilling wine on someone, an excited reader with Maglor, Maglor being soft and leaving for home.

Chapter 22

----------------------------------------------

After telling your friends about the new medicine, they congratulated you and then helped you get started on leaving Doriath and returning home. You got a bag to carry the medicine recipe, the seed bags, and the letters you decided to take with you. You got your old clothes back, which were surprisingly clean and stitched up from all the holes you received from the vampires.

Luthien helped you find someone who could guide you out of Doriath and take you to the nearest town, and now the two of you were walking down the corridors. Your friends made sure to pack your bag with water so you would have enough to tolerate the sun during your journey.

“Now I’m sad to see you go. You had been so fun to have around,” Luthien said. 

“All good things must come to an end eventually. But thank you, you have been fun to have around as well,” You smiled. 

“And besides, it doesn’t have to be like we won’t hear a word from each other ever again. We can send letters to each other. Just don’t let your father find out that I live among the Noldor since he seems to have a huge issue with them,” you said. 

She chuckled.

“Will do?” she said. 

You came to one of Menegroth’s main entrances. 

“Are you sure you have enough water for the journey? Nelle was adamant that you have enough to avoid getting a heatstroke,” Luthien questioned. 

“I think two flasks of water will be enough. It’s only a day’s journey to reach Himring,” you answered, patting the water flasks inside your bag. 

“Well, how about I get you a third one just to be sure?” she suggested. 

“I’m gonna get you the third one. Wait here.” she left before you could protest. 

You obediently waited for her while glancing at some passing elves. 

“Seems like you’re finally leaving,” a familiar voice stated. 

You prevented yourself from groaning audibly and turned toward the last person you wanted to see before you left. Saeros stood there with a rather smug expression. 

“Yep. My wounds have healed and my good caregiver deemed my head was good enough to travel on my own without an issue, so it’s time for me to go home,” you answered. 

Saeros scoffed. 

“Finally. It was getting tiresome to see your face around and constantly nagging on the princess,” he remarked. 

You frowned. “I see it as accepting her requests to go on walks. You, on the other hand, seem to love nagging me even though I’m trying to mind my own business,” you stated.

“Save your tongue. Why would I waste my time on you?” he asked. 

“Well, aren’t you doing it right now?” you questioned. 

“Like… don’t you have anything better to do? I've been kindly trying to stay out of your way, mind my own business, but then you come around and try to bite me on my ass,” you said, slowly losing your patience.

“Are you desperate for drama or are you just that insufferable that you just need to show your human-hating face?” you asked. 

“Insult me once more and I will take the issue to King Thingol,” he snapped at you. 

“Of course, you would, then what? He’s gonna throw me into a dungeon because your pretty little feelings got hurt? You know, maybe that’s why you don’t have a ring or something that indicates you are married. The poor lady has to be a saint to marry someone like you,” you stated, looking him up and down.

He looked more pissed off. 

"For a human, you sure have a sharp tongue. Didn't your family teach you any manners? Is that why they live separately instead of in the same place as you? They couldn’t bear the shame of having a daughter like you?" he questioned, making you frown.

“Careful… don’t bring my family into this,” you warned him. 

“Or what? Are you gonna attack me? Did your little feelings get hurt?” he taunted. 

“I pity your father. I could never imagine myself having a daughter so unmannered and wild as you,” he added. 

“Oh, I then pray that you never end up with a daughter. I couldn’t imagine having a condescending asshole like you as a father,” you remarked. 

He seemed prepared to snap at you, but before you two could say anything else. Luthien appeared with a third water flask. 

“(Name) here you go. This should be enough to last your journey and under the sun,” she handed you the flask. 

“Thanks. you really didn't have to, but thank you,” you said gratefully. 

“Oh, lord Saeros. I didn’t see you there. I’m just sending my friend off on her journey,” she smiled. 

“Continue then. I think I’m done here,” Saeros said turning around. 

“Please do, and let us never meet again,” you said. “Be careful when you run your mouth and hurt your sensitive feelings. They might end up killing you next time,” 

“Certainly… though I cannot imagine someone so pathetic that they can’t handle mere sunlight,” he said with his back turned to you, but you heard him loud and clear. 

It was like a blood vessel popped in your head. You turned toward the nearest table where you saw a wine goblet filled with wine. You grabbed it and then tossed it at Saeros, hitting him on the head and spilling wine all over him.

A shriek echoed through the corridor and a pair of footsteps ran away. 

Maglor was walking around the town you had mentioned where you would stop before making your way to Himring. The town was bustling with people and travelers, but despite having waited for a while, there was no sight of you. Had he come too early, or had he possibly come to the wrong town?

His horse snorted at him, having become impatient walking around all day. 

Maglor felt a sense of worry. The morning already passed. Where on earth could you be? Did something happen to you? 

He stopped for a moment, contemplating whether he should make the trip to Doriath, even though it might be risky for him. He and his kin were not welcome there since the day King Thingol banned Quenya all over Beleriand.

You suddenly stopped when you saw him standing there. You recognized his horse, which made you frown curiously. 

“Maglor?” you said and he turned toward you. 

Maglor felt relief release from his chest when he saw you. 

“It is you! What are you doing here? I said in my letter that I was gonna come to Himring after passing this town.” you questioned as you walked over to him. 

“I thought it would be faster if I came to get you myself. I was also worried you might end up meeting unpleasant creatures on your way to Himring so I might have also come for your protection,” Maglor explained. 

“That’s really sweet of you. Thought I’m certain I would have been just fine on my own, “ you said as you petted his horse. 

“But! Guess what,” you rummaged through your back and grabbed the medicine recipe. 

“I finally got the medicine. Melian figured out a concoction that would allow me to be curse-free for three months,” you explained with a grin. 

“Can you imagine that, three whole ass months! I don’t even have to take extra medicines during that,” you smiled. 

“That’s… wonderful,” Maglor smiled in return. 

“And what’s even better. Melian gave me the necessary flower seeds and ingredients so I could grow them myself, meaning I don’t have to worry about my storage,” you added. 

“This accidental visit to Doriath has been the best thing to happen to me, minus the night when I turned and ended up fighting vampires,” you stated. “But I’m alright now. The wounds are barely even noticeable,” you said while Maglor listened with a soft smile. 

“My stay there was not too bad. I met my two friends, made a new one and it was alright. There was this one elf I didn’t get along. He was such a bitch and I didn’t even do anything but exist to piss him off. I believe that guy had a whole tree stuck up his ass,” you uttered. 

“And he might also be the reason why I kinda had to leave early from there,” you said and Maglor frowned. 

“Why? What happened?” he asked. 

“When I was leaving, he said something that kinda pissed me off, and then I might have thrown a goblet full of wine at him, hitting his head and getting wine all over him for the second time,” you explained with an embarrassed smile. 

Maglor progressed with what you told him before holding in a snort. The thought of some stuck-up sindar lord getting wine all over him made him crack and laugh loudly. 

“It’s not funny! I could have gotten into real trouble if I didn’t leave,” you said scoldingly. 

“I know…” Maglor giggled. 

“Then stop laughing!” you said then he looked at you, smiling wholeheartedly. You then ended up cracking into laughter as well. 

“Anyway, I’m actually really glad that you came,” you said. 

“I’m glad to see you too…” Maglor said back. 

“Shall we get going? Going through the mountains is not pleasant at night?” he said. 

“Yeah, let’s go,” you said as you two started walking through the town. 

“You know, maybe I should learn to ride a horse, especially if I end up somewhere distant again, but the last time I rode something was a pony when I was five,” you started. “I could arrange someone to help you learn if you like. Or I could teach you myself,” Maglor answered. 

“That would be lovely, but wouldn’t have anything better to do than waste your time on a mortal like me?” you asked and he chuckled. 

“You are never a waste of time to me,” he said as you journeyed back to Himring together. 

[foxgloveinspace]

@excelsior9173 🫡 Fox’s Fic Rec Extravaganza:

(Sorry for another post/tag, but you can’t posts links very easy in comments and knowing me…. I’d run out of room on the comments lol. I’m also gonna just copy past the descriptions of the fics for you 🖤)

Transformers (Megatron/Optimus Prime):

Victory Conditions by astolat:

“Do you want me to tell you a story?” Megatron said mockingly. “You won’t like it, Prime. It’s not a very nice one.”

[Foxgloves Notes: Megatron and Optimus Prime get trapped in a cave and think they are gonna die. astolat is just an amazing author, so I wanted to include one of their works. I am gonna go reread this actually once I finish this post lol.]

Assassin’s Creed (Altaïr/Malik):

Life studies its own emptiness by Scarecrow

"For the coming year, as penance for what you have taken from him, you will obey Malik Al-Sayf absolutely"

══════════════

A study on the nature of grief, recovery, loss, and longing; a year in the life of Malik Al-Sayf as he adjusts to his injured body, and grasps with a hollow desperation for a reason to live after failing to protect his sibling, as told in slices of the twelve months he spends learning to forgive Altaïr Ibn-La'Ahad, the man he blames for his brother's murder.

[Foxgloves Notes: ok, so this is omegaverse. But I am SO PICKY when it comes to omegaverse, so please. Please trust me on this one. The writing on this fic takes my breath away. It’s some of the best written work I’ve ever read in my entire life. I teared up reading this. Idk, like I know it can turn people off, but it’s the best one out there truly, and I was changed after reading it. (You can read this one blind, I think it tells you all you need to know about the plot of the game that you’d need to know, so. some of the most amazing prose I’ve ever read, some of the most gut wrenching lines, just. Fuck dude, this fic is so so good.]

Assassin’s Creed (Altaïr/Desmond [my favorite assassin’s creed ship🫡]):

I was born for this - esama:

Juno did her best to lead him to her preferred fate, but the end is coming and Desmond has doubts.

[Foxglove Notes: I feel like I have to rec the most kudosed fic in the fandom. I like esama’s style, I don’t know you’ll feel about it, but. I also genuinely love this fic, I’m not just reccing it cause it’s popular, I’m reccing it cause it’s a good read, and I liked the plot. It’s a time travel fix-it fic (my favorite trope).]

Tron (Sam/Tron, of course):

We Are Pilots - shirozora:

Six months and Sam still can't shake off his father's ghost, so Quorra suggests returning to the Grid to find the answers he needs to move on. With her monitoring from the outside, Sam goes in not knowing what he'll find or if he'll succeed. What he discovers is a dying Grid that needs his help to rebuild… and Tron, who needs to become himself again.

[Foxglove Notes: I don’t know what to say here. This is like The Classic SamTron fic. I just. *muwh* I love this fic]

Mea Culpa - 2019-2020 (EnglishLaguage):

Alan and Tron (accidentally) start to communicate. This is long overdue.

[Foxglove Notes: my notes?? 😭😭😭😭]

Genesis - EnglishLanguage:

Clu’s reintegration with Kevin Flynn burns the Grid to ashes. Sam rebuilds.

//

Prompt: Where did we come from?

[Foxglove Notes: same as the above really, EnglishLanguage is just…. Wow. Breath taking writing.]

Kingdom Hearts (Ventus/Vanitas):

You’re not the boy you used to be. - magicities:

There's no guidebook to tell you how to react when someone who made your life not worth living dies. There are, however, hands to hold yours tight as you stumble through the wreckage.

If only you can convince yourself to take them.

Vanitas: the place he came from, the home he found, and the people who helped him find it.

[Foxglove Notes: this is my favorite book of all time. Like, not even my favorite fic, it is genuinely my favorite Book of all time. It is kingdom hearts so it’s got some jarring moments where your like ‘wait, Minney Mouse??’ And you just have to roll with it cause it’s a COMPLETE au, so there’s nothing in the setting that is about kingdom hearts, it’s just the characters. I think about this work at least once a week, it’s so much more than that description, but I feel like I can’t actually talk about what is in the fic, cause it’s one of those stories where part of the story is things getting revealed. (If you read this tho, please know because it’s a complete au, you might want to treat it as its own novel, and not try to get into KH fic cause I can not in good graces tell someone to read none au KH fic without knowing anything about how absolutely bonkers the game series is. I can not even explain the plot, but that’s the point, the point of the games is that they are meant to be experienced, not explained…… sorry I went on a KH rant, it’s one of my longest hyperfixations lmao.)]

[thearvariblues]

Day 3: “Please, kiss me.” + angst

You can find the whole fic using this tag, or you can check it out on AO3. :)

*** Kim is prowling through the main family house. His mood is still shitty, has been since yesterday. How dared they do this to him? To tie him up? To keep him tied up while Vegas was having fun with the goons Kim knocked out and took captive?!

It was Kim’s right to be there and torture them! And they just left him out.

Him, Kim Theerapanyakul!

Wik!

Seriously, who dares to push Wik away?

Except for Chay, obviously.

Kim snarls, walking faster. He can’t wait to get home, to his apartment and his beloved punching bag. He really needs it now. Kinn’s lucky he didn’t try to tie Kim up today. But then again, he can’t, not really, not when Vegas isn’t around to actually do the work.

Why did Kim have to come in, anyway? They told Vegas and Pete over the phone!

(They probably didn’t want to risk a repeat of yesterday when Vegas and Pete fucked right next to the bleeding Italian goon. Because they’re apparently both insane and constantly horny. Kim hates them so fucking much…)

“P’Kim!” a voice behind him calls out, making him stop dead in his tracks. He knows the voice, and besides, there’s only one person who calls him P’Kim…

He hears running footsteps coming closer and forces his body to turn around, to check whether he’s dreaming or not.

His gaze falls to where Chay’s eyes are supposed to be, where they always used to be, only to see a perfectly chiseled chin instead.

Kim gulps, his gaze traveling up… up… up…

Oh, fuck, he got taller. How did he get so much taller?!

Sweet little Chay is definitely not so little anymore. He’s basically towering over Kim now. And come on, Kim knew the kid had grown up during the past year, but he hasn’t had a chance to see Chay up close and truly realize just how much he’d really grown.

And it’s not just his height. He’s gained muscle. His shoulders are broader, his arms a bit bigger…

Well, fuck me. Literally, please.

“P’Kim!” Chay repeats, and his eyes are full of deep sorrow and impossible anxiety. “P’Kim, I’ve just heard! Is it true?!”

“Is… what true?” Kim blinks, because Porchay could be referring to quite a number of things and Kim doesn’t want to risk blurting out something he definitely shouldn’t say out loud.

“That you’re going on a mission with everyone! That you’re going to risk your life!”

“I don’t think it’s gonna be that dangerous, Chay,” he murmurs, still staring up. Did Chay get more handsome, too, or is it just Kim’s stupid lovestruck brain making things up?

“How could it not be that dangerous?!” Porchay snaps and pushes Kim against the wall of the corridor and oh, it does things to Kim… “There are going to be guns! And people who are not afraid to use them!”

Kim frowns as the cogwheels in his brain all fall into place with a satisfying click.

“Chay?” he says, fighting a tiny smile. “Are you worried about me?”

“Of course I’m worried about you, you idiot! You could die!” Chay yells. His eyes are glossy with unshed tears that almost break Kim’s heart.

“Oh,” he whispers. “Oh, Chay…”

Chay stops and contemplates for a second, then clearly changes his mind

“I mean, you could die and I wouldn’t care! Because I don’t care about you at all! I hate you!”

He tries to push Kim away, but the movement is unfortunately made impossible by the fact that Kim’s back is still pressed against the wall. So Chay does the next logical thing, which is taking a step back…

“No!” Kim’s lips blurt out before his brain can stop them. At the same time, his hands shoot up to grab Chay’s loose gray T-shirt.

Oh, come on, Kimhan, are you really that desperate? Pathetic.

Porchay stops. Apparently, it’s his turn to be confused as hell. Whatever. Kim doesn’t care. In over a year, this is the first time the boy – no, the young man – has come anywhere near him, and he’s almost as close as Kim’s wanted him to be ever since that terrible realization of how badly he fucked up, and Kim is not willing to let go, not yet, not when he knows Chay’s worried about him.

“What the fuck do you want, Kim?”

And oh, the use of just his name kinda stings.

“Me?” Kim snaps back out of reflex. “You’re the one who came running to me!”

“Because I… Uhm.”

Chay’s so close Kim can feel the slight tremble going through his body, making Kim’s heart speed up.

“Kiss me, Chay,” he whispers. “Please, kiss me…”

That seems to be the right choice of words. Chay looks down at Kim’s lips, then further down at his hands still clutching the gray T-shirt. Kim closes his eyes, waiting for the kiss he so desperately wants… Only to feel Chay abruptly take a step back.

Kim’s hands fall back to his sides.

“What, you need some more information?” Chay scoffs.

“Chay. It’s not…” Kim bites his lower lip hard to stop the tears that are currently trying to well up in his eyes.

“P’Kim?” Chay’s suddenly worried voice asks, and Kim realizes the tears have already spilled.

Oh, fuck it.

He opens his eyes.

“I don’t need any fucking information,” he hears himself say. “I just need you, for fuck’s sake!”

That actually causes Chay to take another step back and frown.

Awesome. Just awesome. Precisely what Kim needed today.

He opens his mouth to take the words back, then closes it again. He doesn’t want to take them back. All he wants right now is to curl up into a tiny ball and cry.

“When’s that mission of yours?” Chay suddenly asks.

“Friday,” Kim replies. “Was supposed to be tomorrow, but Kinn has this charity event to attend, meaning Porsche needs to go with him and Vegas needs to go and fuck it up a little, and Pete of course wants to go with Vegas to stop him from fucking it up too much, and…”

You’re babbling, his brain informs him.

He is. So he stops.

Porchay nods.

“Right,” he says. “Try… try not to get killed, okay?”

And then, before Kim’s brain has a chance to process what he said, Chay turns around and literally runs away.

“What?” Kim replies quite a few seconds after being left alone.

What the hell was that supposed to mean, eh?

Kim shuts his eyes and shakes his head to clear it. It doesn’t help. He can still see Chay’s eyes, feel his surprisingly muscular body against his own…

“Punching bag,” he murmurs, pushing himself away from the wall. “I need my fucking punching bag.”

[yuichi-ro]

Alright here I come to ask you-

What is it like with you and Karim during the summer?? Does he like summer? Would he travel to cooler places during the summer? I must know how you and Karim function!!  ♡

*checks and sees you legally played a reverse card* Mmhm yes alright this is sanctioned

thought thoroughly surprised to see Karim ngl---I should really have a self ship with him I adore him

Anyways! The question at hand-

Well he’s a December baby, hates spicy foods while loving shaved ice and cold noodles and the only ice user ever so, gonna take a stab in the dark and say Karim does not like the heat. Surprise right? 

Which, frankly, is alright with me bc I hate summer! We can hate it together!

Not sure we actually ever go any place though, like reverse snowbirds kind thing. But I don’t think we do a lot when it’s hot outside. To which I will stripe down as close to naked as can be. Sports bra and panties cuz can’t have that under boob rash RIP. Where Karim (within the confines of home only) will break down to just his boxers and a tank top. He does put on more clothes than I think any human should if we go out somewhere but lucky for the both of us neither want to go anywhere if its hot and lay on the floor like dead and dying starfish from late July to mid September. 

Absolutely no touching. There’s no touching aloud I will kill him. He’s cranky. I’m violent. The sidewalk is doing that shimmery thing when it’s hot and you feel like your dying. It has to be utter desperation and a dry spell of over a week before either of us consider being overly intimate during hot spells. 

That being said, we’re both good planners though. And aren’t practically fond of groups or crowds so we always (when we do leave) make our plans in places that are cool and uncrowded for the most part. Either unpopular beaches, mountain areas or accessing we need a pool before it even gets hot. And yes, we will both stoop as low to sit in individual kiddie pools if it’s insufferable for even more than two days. 

All in all summer is not our season in any way shape or form so chances are all kids are conceived in winter or spring bc fuck hot weather 😒

[prettylittlepinkthings]

Home

Chapter One- Goodbye

A bell rang from the front door of a local restaurant in East Tennessee. A pale waitress seated the elderly regulars with a smile. There was a table towards the far end of the restaurant next to a window. It was quieter there; they always said it made conversation easier.

“Will it be the usual eggs, grits, and bacon for you two today, Mr. and Mrs. Johnson?”

Mr Johnson gave the waitress a smile and joked, “I’m beginning to think we come here too often, Lucy!”

Lucy shook her head, “That’s ridiculous you all are my favorite customers! I don’t know what I’d do if I didn’t get to see you every Sunday.”

The usual chorus of “what a sweet girl”s rang out from the couple, and she took their orders. They really were her favorite customers. They left the largest tips. It kinda sucked that she had to watch them be so cute together though. She cringed at how bitter she had to be for being upset and seeing an elderly couple get along.

She really didn’t want to be a depressing, bitter, lowlife. She had just expected she’d be doing a little more with her life at 21. Really, who’s life goal was to live with their mom and wait tables all their life? Granted, it might’ve helped if she hadn’t spent her high school years in a semi-miserable daze. You don’t exactly leave with plans when that happens.

The semi-miserable daze of yesteryear got her through the rest of the work day too. She walked home quiet and alone. The walk home was never bad. Hell, most of the time it was the highlight of her day. It was peaceful and pretty. She got to walk past the train track which however childish it was, always made her happy if she got to see one go by.

She entered the house quietly so as to not wake her mother. It was already nine, and the poor woman needed her sleep. She shed off her work clothes and crawled into bed. The air conditioning unit had gone out a month ago, and they hadn’t been able to get it fixed yet. She was getting tired of having to peel herself off her sheets in the morning.

Lucy didn’t know if it was the heat or just her own mind, but she couldn’t sleep. Everytime she was almost there the knowledge of her shituation would come crashing in on her. She’s 21, never went to college, never left her hometown, with no friends, and living with her mom. Was she gonna die this way? Oh god she hoped not. It wasn’t like she could afford college though. Her mother only made so much money, and so did she. She could swing a semester at most if she was really good with her money. Trade school was an option she supposed, but she didn’t feel like that was right either.

Lucy began to wonder if she had ever had any real aspirations. She had never really had a “dream” as a kid. A job never really on her radar either. She had always had other things to be wrapped up in. Just to see if maybe she had ever had any ideas, she decided to look through her old childhood journals. Most of them were shitty old poetry and sort of depressing ramblings, until she got to one entry. It described her working on making costumes and set pieces for her middle school play. That had been fun hadn’t it? Doing set design didn’t sound too bad.

As the night continued, she flipped back and forth between trying to convince herself to go through with it and desperately trying to convince herself not to. There probably wasn’t much money in it, but there wasn’t a fortune to make waiting tables either. She would have to move out west, but she had always wanted to travel. What were the odds she’d even be able to? She didn’t know, but she felt like she’d be happier if she at least tried.

By six in the morning she had convinced herself and started to pack. She didn’t have much to take. There were some dresses, pants, shirts, one extra pair of shoes, her wallet. Once she finished, she made her way downstairs so she could call her boss and tell her she would not be returning to work. 

Her mother caught her in the middle of that activity and furrowed her brows, “What the hell are you doing?”

Lucy finished her call and turned to her mom, “I’m quitting my job.”

“Yeah, I heard that bit. I was asking why.”

Lucy shrugged, “I don’t feel like there’s anything for me here, so I’m moving.”

Her mom’s eyes widened, and she gave a sarcastic, “Oh, so you’re just going to…what? Move out west and become a movie star?”

Lucy laughed, “Close! I’m going to be a set designer.”

“Lucy, that’s fucking insane-a set designer?! You’re giving up a decent job to leave the city and make minimum wage?”

Lucy sighed and looked her mother in the eyes, “Listen mom, I don’t wanna live my life never having been outside the suburbs. I wanna at least try to do something more. Just give me a year, and if I don’t have anything going for me out West, I’ll come back, okay?”

Her mom sighed, “I’ll give you six months.”

“Seven,” Lucy replied, “Give me seven, and then I promise I’ll come back if it doesn’t work out.”

Her mom nodded, “Alright, but if you’re gonna go I recommend you go ahead and get your train ticket. It leaves in an hour.”

Lucy hugged her mom, “Thank you so much! I love you.”

Her mom laughed and hugged her back, “I love you too. Now, get down there before you miss the train!”

Lucy nodded and headed towards the train station. She managed to get a ticket and get on in time. In about 35 hours, she’d be in Los Angeles. She watched her town disappear out the window with a mix of excitement and terror. Seven months was all she had to get established enough to stay. She’d have to make it work somehow.

[under-moonlight]

I leave for jersey in 5 days and I feel really good about it. I get to witness one of my best friends getting married and even though I’ll likely be attending alone I understand that life just is that way sometimes and it’s just not my time. I still stand by my decision to heal. It’s just weird we would always meet at the train and go into Manhattan nearly every other weekend and she’d listen to me rant about jax and tell me she’s no good etc and she was right. I’d be lying though if I said I didn’t believe that aside from all that what me and jax had was so special we could get through it if we were both dedicated. That’s the problem though, free will, we really could’ve been the ones but it all came down to the fact that she didn’t choose me. Anyway enough about her.

I have a facial and hair appointment on Thursday and I’m so excited for both they are very desperately needed and my esthi & my stylist both have me chatting away everytime and I love catching up with them both. I’m holding space for liberty science center with cinco because I really wanna go but she doesn’t know if she can yet. Maybe Christian will tag a long as if we didn’t spend every second possible together while he was visiting St. Louis for 3 weeks.

Fuck, Jersey really fucking is my place as much as I wanna think it’s not. Just because Jackie lives there doesn’t mean it’s tainted but it makes me think I can’t go back. But all of my best of friends live there. I just don’t feel like I belong anywhere else like I did in jersey and that’s why I can’t let it go. I spent 6 years there on my own and that’s where I most discovered who I am as a person and I just can’t act like that’s not where my home is. I really wish I could go back but I know if I don’t take full advantage of the setup I’ve made here then I’ll regret it. I wanna be far away from life for a little bit I want to travel. Once I’m back in jersey I’m just back and that’s it, so I need to just focus on my family & fun here. I wanted a break and that’s what I’m doing so why can’t I just enjoy it? :/

Anyway. Im also going to see Nicole Friday literally the first time I’ve ever met her irl and we’ve been best friends for 3 years online, texting, calling and FaceTime. I’m so beyond excited. Saturday I have a brunch with Angie & then I’m going to a park with fatin��� I seriously under appreciate the friendship fatin and I have. I love her so fucking much.

After that I think I’m gonna get mochinuts with Jaysan. I think he’s into me and honestly idk what to do if he tries to make a move because how do I explain that I’m currently repulsed by the thought of being in a relationship right now. Also I don’t feel that all encompassing pull for him. If I did I would be inclined to change my mind but it’s not like that. I don’t feel the urge to ‘risk it all’

And I would like to state that it’s unfair I’m not due for my period in 13 days but I’m cramping soo bad rn sitting in bed writing this before I get ready for work.

I got on bumble bff and I’m getting consistently hit on and idk how to feel about it, literally what I said before how do I say I really hate that concept of love lol. I matched with this one girl though and she’s super alt-goth she’s got pretty eyes long hair she’s tall and looks like straight up trouble but I’d still make out with her. Lol her name is Megan and so far we’ve made no plans to meet but she’s complimented me a ton and hasn’t called me out yet for not complimenting her at all. Oops