#I feel like they wouldn’t kill Steve but… ya never know

[steddieas-shegoes]

i'm glad i get forever to see where you end

check all tags on and read if you prefer on ao3

rated e, minors dni

happy birthday to my wife in all but law, @messessentialist. this whole idea came out of nowhere and then just kept growing and growing, much like my love for you. anytime you're ready to live our rv life dreams, i'm ready.

i'm not gonna post any links here, but just know i had 8 tabs open of different fish and birds that can be seen in and around indiana lakes. i didn't have a particular lake in mind, but there are plenty to choose from so if it matters to you, i mostly looked at lakes in the northeast and northwest area of indiana.

title is lyrics from forever by noah kahan, which is a song you should absolutely listen to if you haven't before.

this work is for sadie. if she is the only one who reads this, then that's all that matters to me.

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🎣🎣🎣🎣🎣

He stares down at the paper in his hands. He thought he’d feel relief, maybe a tiny bit of happiness that he’d never admit to. He even considered that he might feel a small speck of sadness the day his brother died.

But all Wayne Munson feels right now is disbelief and anger, and he doesn’t know where to hide it before Eddie gets home.

“God damn idiot. Couldn’t even have the decency to die of old age. Had to go and get killed behind bars,” Wayne mutters under his breath as he folds the paper and slips it back into the envelope, hoping that keeping it out of sight might help him come to terms with the emotions flooding his chest. “Bullshit.”

Wayne is tired. He feels exhaustion in his bones, even in his fresh retirement.

For some, retirement is a time to reflect on the life you’ve lived and experience the things you couldn’t while you worked and raised a family. For others, retirement never happens at all.

For Wayne, retirement is a reminder that he almost lost his nephew, his son, and the government had to make sure he wouldn’t say a damn thing about how.

He knows he shouldn’t complain, but damn he sure would like to.

And now he has to figure out a way to tell Eddie that his father got killed in prison. The letter doesn’t say much, just that it was violent and the person responsible for his death is facing further consequences. As if Wayne cares about that. As if it helps explain this situation to a boy who already lost enough.

He sighs as he grabs a beer from the fridge and glances at the clock. Eddie should be home soon. He can’t hold onto this for too long; The news will get out soon enough and he’ll hear it from somewhere else, somewhere who won’t take the time to see what Eddie needs.

He takes a sip of the beer, then another, hoping the next taste of the bitter hops will help him decipher what he needs to say to Eddie.

It’s almost a blessing that Eddie doesn’t arrive home for another hour, giving Wayne time to finish his beer and get started on dinner.

Wayne is already prepared to ask Steve to head out tonight instead of linger, using the excuse of making sure Eddie doesn’t need anything before he goes. Usually Wayne finds it endearing, and hopes Eddie can see what’s so obvious there, but not tonight.

But Steve doesn’t walk in with Eddie.

Eddie’s humming something when he walks in, setting his cane against the table before sitting down in a chair and looking at Wayne with a smile.

“Hey, Wayne. How’s your day been?”

Wayne knows he’s about to ruin Eddie’s day at the very least and he’s not sure if he wants that task. He silently curses Al Munson again, wishing for someone to show up and say it was a mistake just so he doesn’t have to do this.

“Oh, boring. Ya know I hate retirement,” Wayne says as he brushes off the stress, tries to figure out a way to lead in to the news naturally. “Too much time on my hands.”

“You love fishing, though. Thought that’s where you went all morning.”

Wayne nodded. “You’re right about that. Guess I just like keeping my mind busy.”

He’s met with silence, which leads him to looking over to the table, where Eddie is staring at the envelope the letter came in.

Why did he leave it out in the open like that? It’s clearly marked from the prison.

“What’s this?” Eddie asks, always curious to the point of danger. “Dad get out?”

This was one of the worst things Wayne ever had to do and that’s saying something. Vietnam wasn’t for the weak, losing the love of his life nearly killed him, and seeing Eddie in a hospital bed after just barely escaping death is something he’d feel deep in his chest for years. But this was up there.

“No, son,” Wayne sighed, turning away from the pot on the stove. Beef stew and bread with butter was one of Eddie’s favorites, but it took a lot of work. That didn’t matter as much as making sure Eddie had support. “They sent a letter to let me know your dad passed away.”

Eddie didn’t look away from the letter. He was playing with the rings on his fingers, replaced by Steve the moment he realized they were missing in the hospital.

“Did they say how?” Eddie finally asked, still not looking up at Wayne.

“They just said another inmate was responsible. I don’t know any details. I’m sorry, Ed. Really sorry.”

And he is. Despite the fact that Al was a terrible father and made Eddie’s life harder than it should have ever been, he knows Eddie must have a lot of complicated emotions.

“Welp!” Eddie claps his hands on his thighs before finally looking back up at Wayne. “Guess that’s that.”

“It…is?” Wayne is trying to watch for any sign of discomfort or sadness, maybe anger. He sees none.

“Yeah. Not like I’ve really had him around to feel much of a loss.” Eddie smiles. It’s not fake, at least not according to Wayne’s judgment. “You’ve been my dad more than he ever was.”

Wayne feels warmth spreading in his chest at the thought of Eddie seeing him as his parent. It makes sense, but he’s never outright said something. Sure, he gave him Father’s Day cards, often handmade. And yeah, he braved a fishing trip every year for Wayne’s birthday because he knew it meant a lot to him. There was that one time he’d called him Dad when he was on morphine in the hospital.

Hearing it changes something in Wayne.

“You really feel that way, kid?” Wayne asks, sitting down at the table across from Eddie.

“Yeah. I kinda thought you knew that already.”

“Guess it’s nice to hear anyway.”

They don’t say anything else. They don’t need to.

A few minutes goes by before Wayne stands up and walks over to the stew, giving it a stir and taking a spoonful out to test the carrots and beef.

“Is that beef stew?” Eddie asks as the scent hits him.

“Sure is.”

“You were worried about how this was gonna go, huh?” Eddie teases, smirk evident in his voice.

“A little. Can’t blame me, can ya?” Wayne decides it’s done and turns off the stove. He’s grabbing two bowls from the cabinet when the front door opens.

“You forgot the meds!” Steve yells as he runs into their kitchen with a bottle of prescription pills in his hand. He freezes when he sees Wayne dishing out stew. “Sorry. Uh. Am I interrupting?”

Wayne laughs around a sigh, reaching up to grab a third bowl.

“No, have a seat, son. Just gettin’ ready to eat.”

Eddie stands and limps his way to Steve, taking the pill bottle to pocket it before he leans further in his space.

“I’m an orphan!”

Steve’s jaw drops and Wayne does all he can not to laugh. It’s not funny, and he knows that Eddie’s probably not processing the news properly yet, but he’d rather laugh than cry.

“Sorry, what?”

“My dad’s dead. The biological one in prison. Rest in peace to the man who gave me, like, two useful skills and musical talent.” Eddie is still leaning into Steve’s space and Wayne’s watching, waiting.

“I’m sorry, Eddie, that sucks.”

“Nah, it sucks that he was such a shitty dad I barely even feel sad that he’s dead.” Ah, there it is. That’s why he’s doing better than Wayne expected. “I’ve got Wayne.”

“Damn right,” Wayne adds as he pulls spoons out of the drawer. “Let’s eat.”

Steve seems lost for a moment as he looks between Wayne and Eddie, unsure what else to say in this admittedly strange situation.

He finally grabs two bowls off the counter and sets them in his and Eddie’s spots at the table.

“Let’s eat.”

- - -

Two days pass before it really hits Eddie.

Wayne’s been waiting.

Nothing major happens. Eddie doesn’t break down in tears or lash out in anger. He doesn’t even mention saying goodbye in some way.

“We should go on a trip.” He says to Wayne while they’re eating breakfast.

“What kinda trip?” Wayne asks without looking up from his newspaper.

“Camping. Or maybe cabin-ing. Somewhere with walls and running water.” Eddie sounds breathless, like he’s run a marathon. Wayne finally looks up and sees the look in his eyes. “Could go fishing and roast marshmallows and swim and stuff. Like that one time.”

He’s talking about the trip they took together a few months after he moved in permanently. His mama was gone and his dad was sitting in jail waiting for sentencing on an armed robbery turned homicide. Wayne wanted to get Eddie’s mind off everything before he had to go back to school, so he took him up to a friend’s cabin at the lake for a few days.

Eddie’s never been an outside person, but they had fun there.

It was the first time Wayne felt like Eddie was his.

It may have been the first time Eddie felt safe with Wayne, too.

“I could see if that cabin’s available. My buddy doesn’t rent it out much anymore so I’m sure he’d be fine with us using it.”

“Could Steve come?”

“Sure.”

He agrees without a second thought.

This is Eddie’s way of seeking comfort in the people he has left, he can see it from a mile away. If Eddie needs Steve to come with them, it’s no skin off Wayne’s back.

Plus, Wayne can recognize how badly Steve needs to relax. He can’t believe someone as young as him walks with so much tension in his shoulders and lines on his forehead.

“Sweet. He’s never been fishing,” Eddie explains. “Or hiking in the right side up. At least not proper hiking. I guess we aren’t really doing proper hiking. I’m wearing jeans. Can’t be real hiking.”

Wayne smiles down at the sports section of the paper, nodding and humming in agreement when Eddie recommends something else for their trip.

- - -

Steve tries insisting on taking his car as his contribution to the weekend, but Wayne tells him they need the space in his truck for all their gear. It occurs to him when Steve just blinks back at him that Eddie didn’t explain how much is actually involved in all this.

But Wayne takes the time to show him some of the stuff he already has packed in the bed of his truck.

“I thought we were staying in a cabin. Why do we have a tent?” Steve sounds nervous when he asks.

“It’s not a full tent. Just a canopy to hang up to protect us from the sun if we get caught up somewhere during our hike.”

“Hike?” Steve turns towards the trailer, glaring at Eddie, who is too busy trying to figure out which of his sneakers to wear to notice. “He didn’t say anything about hiking. I don’t have boots or, or, anything!”

Wayne grabs Steve’s shoulders, looks him in the eye, and lets out a laugh.

“Do ya think Eddie would agree to go on a hike that requires special boots?” Wayne shakes his head. “Don’t think I could bribe him to go on anything but an easy trail unless that Lars guy from Metallica was at the end of it.”

“So I’ll be fine in my Nikes?” Steve clarifies.

“Better than.” Wayne turns back to the truck bed. “I grabbed an extra pole for ya, but it’s a bit short. We can make it work, though.”

Steve stares at everything piled into the truck. Wayne stares at Steve.

He can’t read him quite like he can read Eddie, not yet, but he’s got a feeling that Steve’s overwhelmed by the effort. Wayne doesn’t know much about his upbringing, but he can imagine it was pretty lonely what with his parents being gone more than they were home.

He’s certain Richard Harrington wouldn’t even know how to cast a line, let alone catch a fish.

“Wayne! Should I just bring both?” Eddie’s standing barefoot on the top step of the deck, holding two pairs of sneakers up.

“Sure, Ed.” Wayne looks down at his bare feet and wrinkles his nose. “Don’t forget your socks.”

“Does he do that a lot?” Steve asks, still staring at everything in the truck.

“Not so much anymore. When he’s got a lot on his mind, though, he forgets little stuff. Socks, underwear, eating.” Wayne could go on, but he’s pretty sure Eddie will kill him if he does. “He’s excited for this trip so it probably isn’t at the front of his mind.”

“Right, yeah. I noticed that.” Steve finally looks at Wayne, small smile on his face. Fond, Wayne would say. “He was so caught up on picking up the kids for game night, he forgot the games.”

“Sounds like our boy,” Wayne said, waiting for any kind of negative reaction from Steve at his words.

But Steve’s smile grew, his cheeks flushing a light pink. He looked over at where Eddie had been standing moments ago, and Wayne watches him.

“Steve, I feel like-“

“Wayne! We forgot hot dogs!” Eddie calls from inside the trailer, front door wide open allowing him to see Eddie’s movement by the fridge. “And buns!”

Steve looks back at Wayne. “I can run and get some while you finish up here.”

“I already grabbed them. Check that red cooler and the bag next to it,” Wayne gestured towards three coolers along the side of the truck bed. “He wasn’t payin’ attention when I told him I was packin’ everything.”

“Not surprising.”

“We got it all Ed! Throw your bag in and let’s go!” Wayne calls towards the trailer. “He’s gonna throw a fit about ridin’ in the middle, but that’s what he gets for bein’ a bean pole.”

Steve snorts as he walks over to open the passenger door. “He’ll live.”

Wayne thinks Steve’s gonna fit right in.

- - -

The cabin is off the beaten path. It’s actually off of all paths. They’re lucky that Wayne’s friend visited recently to clear bushes and trees away so they could get to it.

Forest surrounds it on three sides, the lake is in the back.

It’s quiet, an escape for all of them, but especially for Eddie. Whatever thoughts are trying to cloud Eddie’s mind might just float away in the fresh air if he manages to relax enough.

They unload the truck efficiently, bringing everything inside except the fishing equipment, which stays on the front porch so Wayne can load it on the boat before nightfall. He doesn’t bother locking his truck up; There’s no one around for two miles at least.

Steve’s loading things into the fridge and Eddie’s…

“Where’s Ed?” Wayne asks as he grabs his duffel bag to bring to one of the bedrooms.

“Said he wanted to see how cold the water is,” Steve shrugs, shoving the beer to the side so he can make room for Eddie’s Mountain Dew. “Told him it’s probably not that cold since it’s August.”

“Anything less than boiling is too cold for that one,” Wayne chuckles. “I’ll go load the boat.”

He goes out the back door, immediately locating Eddie at the water’s edge. At least he didn’t go far. He was a bit of a flight risk at the best of times and these weren’t really the best of times.

His shoes and socks are off, sitting in the mix of sand and rocks that make up the shoreline. The rocks are smooth, worn down over thousands of years of water and animals and people. Perfect for skipping across the top of the water, splashes disrupting the calm of a lake with few visitors this close to the end of summer.

Wayne showed Eddie how to skip rocks years ago, not on this lake, but a much smaller one that they’d visited for the day the summer before he started high school. It took him about 100 tries before he got it, but when he did, he’d beamed back at Wayne, proud of himself for possibly the first time in his life.

But he’s not skipping rocks now. He’s standing at the shoreline, where the small waves break against the sand, staring out at the horizon. Wayne is tempted to leave him be, but he can’t.

He walks up behind him, makes sure to clear his throat so he isn’t completely startled when Wayne stops right where the water stops. It licks right at the toes of his boots, but they’re his work ones, steel-toe.

Eddie turns and gives him a small smile.

“Sorry, just wanted to dip my feet in.” Eddie apologizes as if Wayne would care that he’s already finding solace in the solitude of the lake.

“Stay out here as long as you want, kid. You okay?” Wayne watches as Eddie’s hands curl into fists and then relax against his thighs.

“Yeah. Thanks for bringing me out here. I’ll help load the boat,” Eddie offers, already turning towards Wayne fully and taking a step out of the water. Wayne holds his hand up to stop him. “What?”

“I got it. You can help pack the cooler in the mornin’.”

Eddie shrugs and turns back to the lake.

Wayne watches him for another minute, silent so he doesn’t disturb whatever thoughts are brewing in Eddie’s head.

As he walks back to the porch to grab the tackle boxes and poles for the boat, he sees Steve watching Eddie out the kitchen window, concerned frown and furrowed brow on his face.

Steve doesn’t notice him.

- - -

The first night is Wayne making dinner while Steve and Eddie argue over which side of the queen sized bed they’re sleeping on. He can’t help but laugh at how quickly it went from calmly suggesting the other person sleeps on the window side to personal insults.

When he hears Eddie say something about Steve’s hair being too big, he shouts for them to join him.

Dinner is relatively peaceful considering the warzone that was their shared bedroom moments before sitting down to eat. Everyone enjoys the chicken and green beans Wayne cooked, barely leaving any for leftovers. They talk about their plans for the morning, and Steve offers to clean up after they eat so Wayne can have an early night.

It’s kind of him, but he already knows their arguing is just gonna wake him up if they haven’t settled on the bed issue.

“How about you take turns sleepin’ by the window?” Wayne asks before agreeing to an early bedtime. “That way it’s fair.”

“But who has to sleep there tonight?” Eddie asks, sticking his tongue out at Steve.

“Rock, paper, scissors?”

“That’s stupid.”

Wayne raises his brow at Eddie’s crossed arms. “Draw straws then.”

“We don’t have straws.” Steve looks around the kitchen, trying to find something they can use in place of straws, but fails. “It’s fine. I’ll take the window.”

Wayne can tell he doesn’t want to, and he’s pretty sure he can guess why neither of them is thrilled with sleeping directly under a window that looks out into a dense forest, but Steve’s a self-sacrificial kind of guy. That’s been clear for as long as Wayne’s known him.

He also knows that Eddie, even as stubborn as he is, wouldn’t let a friend feel uncomfortable.

“I’ll take it tonight.” Eddie offers.

“No, it’s okay. I can take it.”

Wayne rolls his eyes. “Y’all will argue over anything.”

Steve and Eddie both turn to him with matching grins. “Mhm.” They agree in unison.

“Eddie takes window tonight,” Wayne says. “Steve can have it tomorrow night. Whoever catches the biggest fish this weekend gets to pick on the last night.”

“Sounds fair,” Steve nods, turning to Eddie to see if he agrees.

“Sure. Fair.” Eddie stands and starts clearing the drinks from the table.

Wayne decides to leave before he gets dragged into a new disagreement. He’s only got so much patience.

He’s not surprised to hear them go out the back door after the sun sets, voices quiet, but still audible through Wayne’s open bedroom window.

They don’t go far, just past the porch, about halfway to the water.

“You know, my dad would never have done anything like this with me,” Steve states, only a small hint of bitterness in his tone. “He didn’t believe in bonding time or whatever. Thought that was for fathers and sons who didn’t have a family business to maintain.”

“My dad never did either.” Eddie says back, and Wayne’s heart stops in his chest. “Probably couldn’t have stayed sober enough to make the drive to a place like this.”

Wayne waits for Steve to say something, anything. He waits for so long, he’s tempted to look out the window and see if he can see them under the light of the moon.

“Your dad didn’t deserve you,” Steve finally says, quieter than they’d been before, like he didn’t want to disrupt the quiet night with his words. “And you deserved better than him.”

“I had Wayne eventually. I have Wayne now.” Eddie replies just as quietly. “And you do too, ya know.”

Wayne isn’t much of a crier. He’s only done it a handful of times. But Eddie’s words make his eyes well up and his throat burn.

“He barely knows me,” Steve tries to argue.

“He knows enough. You were there for the worst of my shit. You still stick around. You’re here right now even though you could’ve turned down his invitation.” Eddie sounds like he’s holding back tears now. “If you mean a lot to me, you mean a lot to Wayne. You’ll just have to get used to it.”

Wayne wishes he could be a part of this conversation, or at least be able to see them both. He’s respecting their space as much as he can, though. He’s laying in his bed and biting back tears the way any respectful uncle would.

“I’m not used to meaning so much to someone.”

Wayne isn’t sure he hears him right, his voice breaking halfway through, but Steve couldn’t have said anything else.

He should stop listening. This is turning into something else entirely, he thinks. He shouldn’t hear whatever Eddie says next.

“You mean everything to me.”

Wayne closes his eyes, holds his breath, hopes that if Steve takes it the way he knows Eddie means it, that this doesn’t turn into a real fight. He hopes that Steve’s reaction is kind, even if it’s not what Eddie wants.

Wayne’s almost grateful that he can’t hear what Steve says next. Whether it’s rude or loving, he doesn’t want to be a part of this moment like this. He can’t close his window, they’d hear it. He can’t leave his room, he’ll just be in view when they come back inside.

He waits one minute, two, three. He hears a twig snap and then quiet giggling.

He smiles to himself as he hears footsteps heading back towards the cabin.

🎸🎸🎸🎸🎸

Eddie wakes up with Steve’s arms around him and something bubbling in his chest.

Could be heartburn, or it could be the love that’s been growing inside him for months.

He remembers their conversation last night, looking up at the stars and listening to the leaves gently brushing against each other in the breeze, and he can’t help the blush on his cheeks. When Steve kissed him last night, he was pretty sure he was dreaming.

This wasn’t a dream, though.

They stayed up way too late. Eddie knew the moment he looked at the clock as they got into bed and saw 1:48 in bright red that he’d struggle today.

He could hear Wayne moving around the cabin, probably making coffee and breakfast for them since they’d need an early start for fishing. It wasn’t Eddie’s favorite thing to do, but Wayne loved it, and Eddie loved Wayne.

Steve groaned as he moved one arm above his head.

Eddie looks up at him, blushing harder when Steve’s half-lidded eyes are already looking down at him. He’s smiling, cocky if Eddie’s reading him right.

“Sleep okay?” Steve’s sleep-raspy voice asks, fingers gliding across Eddie’s upper arm in unknown patterns.

“Mhm. Not long enough,” Eddie admits. “Could stay in bed.”

Steve hums in agreement before seemingly realizing that Wayne’s already up. “Don’t think we can skip out on Wayne, though.”

This is why Eddie has a hard time pushing his feelings down for Steve. He’s done this before, whether he realizes he did or not.

In the hospital, the day after he’d woken up, Steve had stopped by to bring some clothes for Wayne since he refused to leave Eddie’s side. The kids had apparently been hounding him to take them with him, but he stood his ground and told them that Eddie needed time with just Wayne right now and that he needed rest.

A few weeks later, Steve could’ve easily taken Eddie home by himself, but insisted on waiting for Wayne to get off of work to do it.

Just a week ago, Wayne had forgotten a few things at the store, and when Steve overheard him grumbling about having to make another trip, he offered to go.

That’s just who Steve is.

Eddie loves him for it.

“Yeah. He’d be so bored without me scaring the fish away with my constant humming and leg jiggling,” Eddie agrees seriously. “Wouldn’t want him to miss me.”

Steve lets out a loud laugh, and Eddie hides his pleased smile in Steve’s chest.

He can’t believe he’s doing this right now, can’t believe Steve’s arm tightens around him, pulls him closer so all he can feel and smell is Steve.

“You could just stay quiet while we fish,” Steve suggests, as if Eddie hasn’t thought of that already. “Just for a little bit.”

“That sounds boring.”

Steve pokes Eddie’s cheek with his other hand. Eddie nips at his fingertip before Steve can pull away. They both laugh.

It’s easy.

A knock on the door interrupts the casual cuddling, but Eddie knows it’s not because Steve’s ashamed to be caught with him like that. Steve isn’t used to this being okay.

“You boys up?” Wayne’s voice is barely muffled through the door, something Eddie notes for later.

“Yeah!” Eddie calls back, though he probably didn’t need to speak more than normal volume.

Steve is tense below him. Eddie hates that.

He tries to soothe him by running his hand along his side, memorizing the bumps of his scars, keeping his breathing even so Steve would calm down. Wayne wouldn’t walk in without Eddie telling him he could, but Steve must’ve assumed he didn’t respect his space that much.

“Breakfast is done. Just made eggs and toast.” Wayne knocks once more on the door before they can hear his footsteps walking back to the kitchen.

Steve relaxes and sighs.

“You don’t have to do that.” Eddie still traces along the scar on his hip. “Wayne’s cool.”

“I know.” Steve goes to sit up, but Eddie holds him down. “Eddie, I know. It’s okay. I didn’t mean to react like that.”

“There’s a price to pay before you get up.”

Steve snorts. “And what’s that?”

“A kiss.”

Steve kisses the top of Eddie’s head.

“Unfortunately, I won’t be accepting that form of payment.”

Steve’s hand cups Eddie’s cheek, thumb rubbing slowly as he guides his face up to look at him. Eddie hopes he can’t feel the heat on his skin, but the odds aren’t great.

“One kiss.”

“Only one?” Eddie pouts.

“Don’t wanna get carried away when we’re supposed to be getting up.” Steve leans in until his breath is hot against Eddie’s lips. “So one kiss and then you let me leave so we can go fishing with your uncle.”

“Fine.” Eddie can’t help smiling into the kiss. It’s quicker than he wants, but it’s perfect. When Steve pulls away, Eddie groans and falls flat on his back. “What if we fake sick?”

“You’re ridiculous,” Steve laughs as he gets out of bed and tries to get changed into regular clothes.

Eddie watches him, can’t wipe the smile off his face as Steve nearly trips over his own pant leg. He doesn’t even care if Steve catches him looking, not anymore.

He gets to look now.

After Eddie’s confession last night, after their first kiss, and the second and third, and talking for two hours by the water, it was pretty obvious that they were skipping over that new relationship awkwardness. Eddie hadn’t quite said he loved Steve, and Steve hadn’t said it either, but actions spoke louder than words. The way they couldn’t stop touching, the way Steve looked at Eddie while he talked about his most recent adventure with Dustin, the way Eddie watched Steve throw rocks as far as he could into the depths of the lake, it was all love.

“If you keep looking at me like that, I’m never leaving this room.” Steve is looking at him as he buttons his jeans and Eddie is considering sending Wayne on his own.

He waited months for this, but now it felt like waiting another hour was too much.

“Looking at you like what?” Eddie asks innocently.

“Like you wanna eat me.”

“Well…” Eddie wiggles his eyebrows and taps the bed. “I could eat breakfast in bed if you get back in it.”

Steve walks over to the bed, leans over Eddie, gets close enough to nip at his top lip.

“Get out of bed.” He presses a quick kiss to Eddie’s lips before walking to the door. He leaves it open as he leaves the room without looking back.

Eddie curses Steve’s ability to get him to do anything, and reluctantly gets out of bed. He throws on his shorts, a tank top, and ties his bandana in his hair so he doesn’t have to worry about it sticking to his forehead.

When he gets to the kitchen, Wayne and Steve are staring out the window and whispering.

“I didn’t think we’d see a marsh hawk. Population’s been down for the last decade,” Wayne’s saying as Eddie walks up on his other side. “I’ve only seen one before and that was during a trip to Lake Michigan when I was 14 or 15.”

Eddie looks out the window, trying to see what they see. He’s not sure what a marsh hawk looks like, but he’s assuming it’s one of the birds in the nearby trees.

Steve wordlessly points it out to him.

“That’s a cool bird.” Eddie says at a normal volume. The bird spreads its wings out, acting as if it might take off. It’s beautiful, the white along its beak and chest a stunning contrast to its dark brown wings.

“It’s good luck to see one in some cases,” Wayne whispers as he turns away from the window. “Seeing one on your wedding day is supposed to lead to a long and happy marriage.”

“Too bad no one’s getting married here today,” Eddie remarks as he grabs a plate and starts to scoop eggs onto it.

“Not married. But still good luck,” Steve mutters as he follows Eddie. “So we just have to grab the cooler on our way out?”

Wayne nods. “And the bait.”

“I thought we used plastic stuff.”

“We use lures, but we put worms on there to get the fish to actually bite,” Wayne explains. “I’ve got plenty of stuff for bass, but I dunno how lucky we’ll be.”

Eddie nods along as he takes a huge bite of toast. “One time we forgot worms and had to use hot dogs.”

“Fish eat hot dogs?” Steve asks in surprise.

“Some fish settle for hot dogs. They don’t quite realize ‘til it’s too late that it ain’t their food,” Wayne shrugs. “But we got plenty of worms for this trip. Should be perfect fishing conditions.”

They all ate in silence after that, but Eddie could feel Steve’s nerves building the closer they all got to clean plates.

Steve didn’t have to say it for Eddie to know he desperately wanted to impress Wayne, especially now that they were…something. They probably needed to clarify exactly what they were at some point soon. They would. Eventually. Tonight maybe.

Or tomorrow.

“I’ll clean up if you boys wanna finish getting ready.” Wayne offered as he scraped the last of his eggs onto his fork.

Eddie took him up on his offer, jumping up to go brush his teeth and get his sneakers on.

“You comin’?” He asks Steve, who’s still slowly eating the eggs he drenched in ketchup.

“Just a second,” Steve replies with his mouth full. “You can use the bathroom first.”

Eddie nods and leaves the room.

He hears the sink in the kitchen running a few seconds later, and the hushed voices of Wayne and Steve having a whispered conversation. He could sneak back, try to listen in, but he thinks that maybe Steve needs this minute alone with him.

He finishes what he needs to do quickly, though, and admittedly sneaks back towards the kitchen quieter than he normally would, hoping to overhear something interesting.

But all he walks into is Steve laughing as Wayne smiles back.

Eddie doesn’t find that he minds much, as long as they’re both happy.

🎸🎸🎸🎸🎸

Being on the boat is different as an adult.

The last time Eddie fished with Wayne on a boat, he was barely shoulder height on him and 100 pounds soaking wet. It was a much smaller boat, though, barely fit two grown adults comfortably.

This boat, however, was built for a family of at least four adults. The awning covered half of the boat, so Eddie didn’t have to sit in direct sunlight when the sun finally rose.

Steve stood to the side, watching Wayne prep the lures and bait, casting his own line out and reeling it in until it was taut. Eddie went next, making a show of it just like he always did. Wayne doesn’t comment, just shakes his head and smiles fondly as he watches the water.

“Um,” Steve starts. “I guess it’s my turn.”

Eddie’s pretty sure Wayne knows Steve’s nervous. It’s hard not to tell with how quiet he’s been the entire ride to the middle of the lake.

Wayne sets his pole in the stand at the stern, and turns to Steve with his hands on his hips. “You saw how I cast mine?”

Steve nods, but doesn’t look sure. Eddie’s not really used to seeing Steve anything less than confident, even in the face of monsters.

It hits him the moment he thinks about monsters.

They’re on a lake. A lake very similar, though much larger, to the same lake that almost dragged Steve to his death. A lake he’d previously trusted, and no longer could.

Eddie doesn’t say anything, just subtly places his hand against Steve’s hip, offering whatever comfort he can. Steve won’t admit he’s scared, but Eddie doesn’t need him to.

Wayne sees it, Eddie knows he does. But because he’s the best uncle, he doesn’t say anything.

He raises a brow and then schools his features back to a comforting smile before showing Steve how to hold the pole so he can cast it comfortably and far enough out that movements from the boat don’t scare the fish from the hook.

Eddie watches, and he sees the nerves slowly easing from Steve’s shoulders, his forehead, and his arms. He relaxes inch by inch, and Eddie couldn’t be more in love.

Wayne steps back so Steve can cast his line.

When the bobber hits the water, Wayne smiles and pats his shoulder. “Good job, son. Now reel it in a bit so you can feel if something bites. Good. Now we just wait.”

Steve turns red at the praise and Eddie realizes that Steve probably hasn’t heard a “good job” from an adult in a very, very long time.

Eddie’s childhood was fucked, but at least Wayne was there cheering him on, showing him what it meant to be proud of your kid eventually. He’s pretty sure Steve hasn’t had that for most of his life.

“How long do we wait?” Steve asks after a few minutes.

The lake is near silent, and the water is so smooth it looks like glass. If Eddie leaned over, he’d probably be able to see his reflection. The gentle lapping of water on the side of the boat and the distant sound of birds in the trees lining the water’s edge fills the air.

“I usually give it 10 or 15 minutes before reeling it in. Check my bait, maybe change the lure if there’s no bites.” Wayne’s watching the end of Steve’s line as he speaks. “I used bass lures on all of ours, but we might change them up in a minute. See what else is out there.”

Steve nods and turns back.

Wayne doesn’t take his eyes off of Steve’s bobber.

Eddie watches Wayne curiously.

Anytime he’s fished with Wayne, he’s left Eddie to his own devices after showing him what to do. He watches his own line, and only steps in to help if Eddie catches something and doesn’t wanna touch the fish.

Wayne’s eyes widen just as Steve exclaims, “Hey! Look!”

“Reel it in!” Wayne shouts, setting his pole down again and rushing to stand next to Steve.

Eddie turns and watches as Steve reels in whatever he’s caught. Judging by the bend in the pole, it’s a decent sized fish.

“Shit, what if it breaks?” Steve asks, voice shaking with the effort of trying to reel in the fish before it escapes.

“It won’t. Keep going.”

When they manage to get the fish out of the water and into the boat, Steve is breathless.

“Look at that!” Wayne holds up the line, right above where the hook is caught in the fish’s mouth, beaming at Steve. “Our boy got himself a king salmon!”

Ignoring his mention of “our” boy, Eddie steps closer and grips Steve’s shoulder, shaking him just enough to make the boat rock.

“How can you tell?” Steve asks Wayne, reaching out to hold the fish up himself.

“You see all these black spots on his back and fins?” Wayne points at a few of the spots. “Other salmon don’t have this many spots or any at all. You keepin’ him or throwin’ him back?”

Steve looks at Eddie, smile falling as he suddenly looks unsure about what the right thing to do is. Before Eddie can say anything, Wayne wraps his arm around Steve’s shoulders.

“Either is fine with me. Could cook him up for supper if you wanna keep him or send him back to his friends with a new piercing.” Wayne looks over at Eddie. “Eddie ain’t much for seafood, but I make a mean baked salmon.”

Steve nods. “Yeah, think I’ll keep this one.”

Wayne pats his shoulder again before showing him how to unhook the fish safely. He opens up the empty cooler he brought and places the fish inside.

Wayne moves to grab the bait so Steve can set up again, and while his back is turned, Eddie takes a chance.

He leans over and kisses the corner of Steve’s mouth.

“You’re a natural,” Eddie whispers as he leans away again.

“Shut up.” Steve is blushing that same pretty pink that he was last night and earlier this morning. Eddie can’t look away. “Just lucky.”

Wayne catches two rainbow trout and Eddie manages to catch a small northern pike, which quickly gets thrown back when Eddie starts to make up a story about how it’s a teenager who got separated from its parents. Wayne shakes his head as Eddie carries on, but he’s used to it. Eddie never keeps his catch if he’s lucky enough to have one.

They relax as the day warms up, popping open cans of soda as the sun gets closer to the middle of the sky. It’s not about fishing anymore; It’s about soaking up the tranquility of their surroundings.

Eddie isn’t known for being still or quiet, but even he can let himself enjoy this. Every day since March has been about survival, and appointments, and witness statements, and lawyers, and moving, and the kids. He feels like he’s barely even had time to think.

So while he sits on this boat with two of his favorite people, he thinks.

He thinks about how different his life is now, and how different it could still be.

He thinks about how much Wayne has sacrificed for him for most of his life, but especially the last five months.

He thinks about how much he wants to tell Steve he loves him.

He thinks he’ll tell him tonight.

📼📼📼📼📼

Steve sits on the porch while Wayne cleans the fish, staying a good distance away so he doesn’t end up seeing things that’ll make him wish he left the poor salmon in the lake. Eddie’s inside doing god knows what.

He’s never been happier.

He does wish Robin could be here, but she hates the outdoors. She didn’t even like going on her family’s beach trip last month.

Plus, he’s pretty sure he wouldn’t have been able to have the alone time he needed with Eddie last night if she were here. Even though she’s been telling him to just talk to him for the last three months, she wouldn’t have caught on to his plan.

Feeling this much for Eddie isn’t new.

After the events of spring break, Steve took a long, hard look at high school and realized that at least part of the reason he was always staring at Eddie was because he was very interested. He started looking for any excuse to stick around in Eddie’s hospital room, and then offered to take him to appointments, and it continued from there.

Now, they hang out almost every day. Sometimes it’s with the kids, sometimes with Robin, sometimes alone.

Steve realizes that even before they kissed and fell asleep holding each other and flirted as much as possible all day, this was the best relationship he’s ever had. He needs to tell Eddie as soon as they’re alone.

“All done,” Wayne says as he steps onto the porch, the container of cleaned fish in his hand. “You ready to learn the secret to makin’ the best fish?”

Steve is quick to nod, excited that Wayne thinks he’s even worth the time it’ll take to show him. Wayne’s been so kind this entire trip, making sure Steve is involved and welcomed, makes him feel like he belongs in their little family.

As Wayne grabs everything they’ll need, Steve sees Eddie through their bedroom door, writing in a journal, tongue poking between his lips as he concentrates. Steve’s never seen this journal, but he can assume it’s another one of his many already filled with songs and campaign ideas.

“You done starin’ at Ed?” Wayne’s voice is quiet behind him, but still makes him jump with surprise.

“Wasn’t staring at him. Thought I saw a…um…bug?” Steve knows he’s been caught halfway through trying to lie, so he moves on. “Ready?”

“Are you?” Wayne raises a brow and smirks.

“Yes!” Steve puts his hands on his hips. “What are you implying?”

“Mostly that you’re too in love with my nephew to focus on what I’m sayin’.”

Steve feels heat in his cheeks, but he chooses to ignore it and pretend that he can distract Wayne from what he’s saying.

“So we’re frying your fish and baking my salmon?” Steve starts holding up some of the spices Wayne’s set out on the counter. He can feel Wayne’s eyes on him. “Looks like you like spice.”

“Steve.” Wayne sighs. “It’s okay to feel however you feel. I ain’t gonna judge.”

“Right. Yeah.” Steve turns to finally look at Wayne, who looks sad. He shouldn’t look sad right now.

“Eddie ever tell ya about Paul?” Wayne starts filling one pan with oil and the other with a few small pads of butter.

Steve shakes his head, watching closely.

“Paul was my boyfriend when Ed first came to live with me.”

Steve’s eyes widen as that hits him.

“Woulda been my husband had we been able to be married.” Wayne starts mixing flour, salt, and pepper in a bowl while he talks. “He was a long haul truck driver. Gone for weeks at a time. Stayed with me when he passed through. Came home one day to Eddie asleep in the bed we usually shared and asked if I’d been up to something.”

Wayne smiles fondly down at the bowl of eggs, buttermilk, lemon juice, and garlic he’d started mixing together as he spoke.

“Told him everything. Expected him to call it quits. He didn’t sign up for raising a troubled kid, especially not one who may not be okay with what we had.” Wayne stops and looks up at Steve. “But he just hugged me and said he’d follow my lead. Whatever was best for Ed was what was best for us. Ain’t sure I could ever find a love like that again.”

Steve can feel tears trying to form in his eyes, but he manages to bite them back. He’s pretty sure he knows where this is going, but he listens without interrupting.

“Ed didn’t take too well to him at first. Probably ‘cause he was in and out so much, didn’t get time to bond with him like I did. Paul was patient. Always so patient with both of us.” Wayne shakes his head and looks down at the counter before he looks up smiling again. “Ed came out to Paul first, ya know? When he was 13. He’d gone on a short haul with him over the summer and when they came back, they were thick as thieves. Paul told me that night that Ed had told him he liked boys and it changed their entire relationship. I was Uncle Wayne, but Paul was like a dad to him. Definitely more than his own dad ever was.”

Wayne looked over to check that Eddie was still in the bedroom, distracted by his writing.

“Paul started taking short hauls instead of long ones. Only gone three or four days at a time instead of 14-20. Thought it was so he could be close to Ed, since we’d kinda become our own little family.”

Steve realizes he’s holding his breath when Wayne sniffs.

“He’d gotten sick and didn’t tell us. Started out thinkin’ it was pneumonia, but it got worse. Doctor thought it was heart problems, but it was everywhere. Leukemia. Untreatable by the time they figured it out.”

Steve’s wrapping his arms around Wayne before he even realizes he’s doing it, letting the tears fall as he thinks about how much pain Wayne and Eddie must’ve gone through to lose someone so important to them.

“Ed was barely 14 when he passed. I think he took it harder than me.”

Steve can’t even imagine. Wayne lost someone he loved, but Eddie lost a father figure after losing his real father to things he should never have had to compete with. And now Eddie’s father was really dead.

All he really has is Wayne.

“Kid shaved his head in solidarity when Paul lost what little hair he had left,” Wayne huffs a wet laugh as they pull away from each other. “Couldn’t believe it when I got home from work and they were both bald as cue balls. Thought they’d lost it.”

Steve and Wayne are both laughing, and it’s probably going to draw Eddie’s attention, but he kinda hopes it does. He could use Eddie’s closeness right now. He needs to see that he’s okay, that this didn’t completely destroy him, that he went on anyway.

But all Eddie does is yell at them to keep it down, which just makes them laugh harder.

“And you never dated anyone else?” Steve asks as Wayne starts putting his fishin the egg mixture. “Not even for fun?”

“Nah. Once Paul was gone, I had to work more to pay the bills. What little time I had was spent with Ed. He was my priority, always.”

Steve wipes the tears from his cheeks as he watches Wayne drop the fish into the hot oil.

“What about now?” Eddie was busy with his own life now, and they’d received enough money from the government to cover their new trailer and have plenty leftover to cover bills. Wayne was retired and had plenty of time to start dating again.

“I got lucky with Paul. It ain’t fair to compare any future relationship to what we had and I think that’s all I’d do. I’m happy the way things are for now.”

Steve drops it for now, but he makes a note to ask Eddie about it soon. He’s surprised Eddie never mentioned Paul, or even the fact that Wayne was gay, especially when he came out to Steve and Robin while he was still in the hospital.

Wayne goes on to explain how long he keeps the fish in the oil before flipping them to make sure the cooking is even, and how putting them onto paper towels to cool drains too much of the grease.

As Steve watches him prep the salmon with a glaze he made from garlic, honey, and lemon juice, Eddie finally comes out of the bedroom.

“Smells like fish,” he says with a grin.

“That’d be the fish.” Wayne doesn’t even bother looking over at him as he leans against the counter. “Salmon is already a tender fish, so you can bake it to whatever you prefer. It should only take about 10 minutes on 400 unless you like it extra crispy, then you may wanna do it for 13 minutes.”

“Chef Wayne teaching you everything you need to know?” Eddie asks Steve, stepping close enough for Steve to feel the heat coming from his body.

“He’s pretty talented. Might need to consider opening a restaurant,” Steve teases.

“Wait ‘til you have his steak. So tender you could cut it with a spoon.”

“Don’t know what you’re after with your compliments, but I’d rather ya just ask for it.” Wayne checked the clock as he closed the oven door.

“I was just bein’ nice!” Eddie exclaims, throwing his arms up in frustration. Steve never noticed how Eddie’s accent changes the more time he spends around Wayne, but he smiles to himself when it slips now. “See if I give ya a compliment again, old man.”

Steve watches as they banter back and forth some more, both of them smiling and laughing the entire time.

It’s nothing like what Steve was used to. His parents never bantered, only fought. Anything that was big enough for discussion, was big enough to yell about. As Steve got older, he learned that staying quiet and letting them get it out would usually turn out better for him. Luckily, once he reached middle school, they didn’t bother coming home enough for him to worry about what to do when they were arguing.

He doesn’t remember a time when there was fun and laughter between them, not even when he was a young child. He can remember his mom dancing with him while his dad was gone on business trips, but the moment he arrived home, the air became thick with tension and her attitude became somber. He remembers one time when his dad let him sit on his desk while he worked, making paper airplanes and having a competition to see how far they could fly, but the moment the phone rang, he was hissing a ‘get out’ with no explanation for the abrupt stop to the fun.

Steve couldn’t imagine talking to either of his parents the way Eddie talks to Wayne, but he also couldn’t imagine receiving the love from them that Wayne so easily gives to Eddie.

And now that he knows another piece of their story, he can see how they’ve come to be like this, comfortable with each other in ways many kids never are with their parents.

Steve’s mind continues to wander throughout dinner, but no one calls him out on it. Maybe Wayne somehow communicated with Eddie that they’d had a serious conversation. Maybe it was just obvious that Steve was far away from the table. Eddie and Wayne chattered as they ate, and Steve let the constant echoes of their voices be the background noise to his thoughts.

“Stevie?” Eddie’s hand touched his cheek, shaking him out of the path he was lost on. “Wayne’s gonna take a walk. You wanna go?”

Steve smiles up at Eddie before looking down at his plate. He barely remembers eating, but he only has a few small pieces of salmon left.

“Sounds good.”

Eddie looks concerned, but Steve brushes him off. He looks around, and when he doesn’t see Wayne in the room with them, turns his face so he can kiss Eddie’s palm.

“Should we grab the bug spray?” Steve asks as he stands, pushing in his chair and grabbing his plate off the table to wash it.

“Wayne’s got it outside. Think he put enough on for all of us,” Eddie follows close behind Steve. “You sure you’re okay?”

“Yeah. Just thinking.”

“About?”

“A lot.” Steve brushes it off so they can join Wayne. “Ready?”

Eddie nods and leads the way out of the cabin.

They ate an early dinner, so the sun is still high in the sky as they make their way down a trail that follows the lake’s edge. Eddie occasionally gets distracted by colorful rocks, holding them up excitedly for Steve and Wayne to acknowledge.

Steve knows the love he has for Eddie is written all over his face.

He doesn’t care to hide it.

Wayne’s quiet as they walk, occasionally pointing out a fish splashing in the distance or a heron standing in the water. He swats a mosquito away from Steve’s face, only for the mosquito to turn around and bite his hand. Eddie’s far too busy climbing over fallen limbs and branches of trees to notice what they’re doing.

“You boys should go for a swim when we get back. Water’s cool.” Wayne makes the suggestion without looking at Steve, who suddenly feels like he’s being studied under a microscope.

“Not sure if Eddie even brought a swimsuit.” Steve laughs it off, hopes they can go back to silence or change the subject.

“I’m sure you boys could figure something out.”

Thankfully, the topic gets dropped and Steve is left wondering if Wayne knows.

Sure, he joked about Steve being in love with Eddie earlier, but that wasn’t a confirmation that he knew they were together. He thought they’d been careful today, but maybe Wayne caught them when they kissed by the truck when Eddie was grabbing his wallet from the glovebox.

He doesn’t have time to think about it more because Eddie lets out a yelp and they can only watch as he falls on his ass into a muddy spot between two large rocks.

“I hate the outdoors,” he grumbles as he stands.

Wayne is laughing, but Steve is rushing over to make sure he’s okay.

“Are you hurt?” Steve’s hands are hovering over him, trying to figure out if he sees any blood. “Did you hit your head?”

“I’m fine, sweetheart,” Eddie replies quietly, holding his arms out as if trying to show proof. “My dignity may be a bit bruised.”

They’re interrupted by the hooting of an owl. It’s loud enough that Wayne shushes them and starts looking around at the trees surrounding them, trying to locate the creature.

It hoots again before Wayne locates it, pointing to a tree only ten feet away and to their right.

“Wow.” Steve says as he gets a close look at it, the white and tan feathers blending into beautiful patterns. “It’s so small. I thought owls were bigger.”

Eddie’s looking up at it, smiling.

To Steve’s shock, he’s the one who responds, not Wayne.

“It’s a northern saw-whet owl. They’re closer to the size of a robin than an owl you may be thinking of.” Eddie reaches for Steve’s hand and squeezes it once before letting it drop. “Paul taught me about all kinds of owls.”

Steve’s head snaps towards him. “You heard us this morning, didn’t you?”

“You weren’t quiet,” Eddie shrugged. “I used to be obsessed with nocturnal animals. He bought me a book about bats and owls for Christmas and went through it page by page with me.”

“I remember that book,” Wayne looks at the owl while he talks. “Paul said it made him nervous to go out at night.”

Eddie laughs. “He was convinced we’d get attacked.”

Steve can’t blame him. The longer he looks at the owl’s impossibly large eyes and spread wings, the more he believes he’s being hunted.

“Ready to head back?” Wayne asks after another minute, drawing his attention away.

“Wish I had a camera like Byers. Probably could get a good picture.” Eddie says as he starts to walk back the way they came.

Steve takes note to ask Jonathan about his so he can get him one for Christmas.

When they make it back to the cabin, Wayne excuses himself to take a shower and do a crossword before bed, which leaves Steve and Eddie to fill their time however they want. Steve thinks back to Wayne’s suggestion about going for a swim, but he’s not sure Eddie would want to now that the sun’s almost set.

He’s not even sure he wants to get into the lake after dark.

But it does sound appealing, especially with the layer of damp sweat coating his skin from their walk. And there is a light on the dock that would make it easier to at least see each other.

“Wanna go for a swim?” Steve asks Eddie as he sips on a soda.

“Now?” Eddie looks out the window in the kitchen, frowning at the darkness looming.

“Now.”

“It’s dark.”

“We can turn on the light at the dock. C’mon. Just a quick dip,” Steve nudges his shoulder as he starts walking to the back door, fully dressed.

“You’re not gonna change?” Eddie asks in disbelief.

“Don’t plan on wearing my clothes in.” Steve winks as he leaves, knowing Eddie will follow him even if he’s hesitant to do so.

Within seconds, the back door is closing and Eddie is on his heels.

“Are we seriously skinny dipping in the lake while my uncle is here?” Eddie hisses out, hand covering Steve’s forearm.

“I’m skinny dipping. You can do whatever you want,” Steve responds. “But I wouldn’t complain if you joined me.”

Eddie huffs beside him, but still follows him the rest of the way to the water’s edge. The light has a covered power switch to their right, but now that they’re in an open area by the water, they realize the moon is pretty bright.

Steve starts stripping off his shirt, then his shoes and socks. Eddie watches, probably trying to decide if he’s gonna join him or go back inside and pretend Steve isn’t naked in the water. When Steve pulls his pants off, Eddie sighs and starts untying his boots.

“Can’t believe you have me getting into another lake. Wasn’t the first time enough?” Eddie’s grumbling loud enough for Steve to hear, but quiet enough that Steve only catches every couple of words and has to use context clues for the rest. He can’t hold back a smile when he shoves his underwear down and leaves them on top of his pile of clothes.

Eddie is still grumbling as he removes his own clothes, enough that he’s distracting himself from realizing Steve’s already naked and waiting for him.

When he looks up, his eyes widen and his jaw drops open.

“You’re gonna catch flies like that,” Steve steps closer as he speaks, feeling more nervous than he expected to. “Probably should get in so the mosquitos don’t get us.”

“Right.” Eddie shakes his head, closing his eyes so he can focus. “Yes. Let’s get in.”

Steve grabs his hand and walks them both to the water. The water is chilly, but not uncomfortably cold. He knows in the next few weeks, the temperature will drop enough at night to cause the lake to be freezing cold. But right now, it’s perfect.

Being here with Eddie is perfect.

Eddie breathes out slowly as they keep walking further in, squeezing Steve’s hand.

“All good?” Steve asks when they’re waist deep.

“Yep. All good. How uh…how far do you wanna go?” Eddie’s looking out at what little they can see of the lake, even with the moonlight glistening off the tiny waves of the lake.

“Just a little more.”

Steve doesn’t take Eddie’s trust for granted here, knows that he’s asking a lot of him.

When the water is just below his collarbone, he stops.

Eddie is tense next to him, but doesn’t seem to be panicking.

“Okay?” Steve asks.

Eddie looks around and then settles back on Steve. “I’m okay.”

Something about the way he says it makes Steve pause, though.

“You can let it out if you need to, baby,” he offers. He’s not sure what it is specifically that makes him think Eddie’s on the edge of tears, but he wants to give him the chance to cry. “I’m right here.”

Eddie doesn’t sob, or cry, or do anything for a minute. They’re both looking out at the dark lake and the moon above, listening to crickets and a gentle breeze in the leaves of the trees nearby. Eddie’s breathing just stops for a few seconds and that’s all the warning Steve gets before he’s sniffling and talking.

“My dad was a piece of shit,” he starts. Steve is gonna follow his lead, and listen, and let Eddie tell him whatever he wants to. Even if that’s all he says. “He hated me. Pretty sure he hated my mom towards the end of her life, too. Anything that put attention on someone other than him was no good. That’s why he got involved with the closest thing Hawkins had to a mafia.”

Steve rubs his thumb against the side of Eddie’s hand under the water, prompting him to continue.

“He ranked pretty high with them so he got plenty of attention. Forgot that he had a wife and a kid. When my mom died, he temporarily got more attention from everyone. Made sure he looked like the mourning husband trying to be strong for the son he barely knew. Even at four and five years old I knew he was full of shit. But at least he was taking me with him sometimes, showing me cool shit. He got arrested when I was seven for petty theft and possession of drugs. Got lucky that the judge believed his sob story of being the only one who could take care of me.” Eddie scoffed. “Paid a fine with money he stole and had to do 80 hours of community service that his boss signed off on after a few weeks. Didn’t care that the only meals I ate were at school and the neighbor’s house when she saw me alone for dinner. Didn’t care that I never had school supplies or clothes that fit. Didn’t care that I missed school anytime I missed the bus, which was often because he never gave me an alarm clock to set to get up in time.”

Steve wants to cry, hearing how shitty Eddie’s childhood was, but he refuses to right now. He doesn’t want Eddie to stop talking.

“When I was nine, he taught me how to steal a car. I could barely see over the steering wheel, but it was the first time I made him proud.” Eddie clears his throat. “He got sent to prison when I was 11. I got put in the system because everything is a mess and Wayne wasn’t even listed as my uncle anywhere. Wayne heard about it all a few weeks later and didn’t stop pushing to have me in his care until they gave in. I’m surprised they put up so much of a fight considering they don’t usually care that much about poor kids with shit parents. Wayne fought for me and I didn’t even know how much he did until I was older.”

Steve glances over to see tears falling down Eddie’s face. He let go of Eddie’s hand to wrap his arm around his waist instead, pulling him against his side.

“He didn’t have to do that. He just knew what a piece of shit my dad was and apparently checked on me a few times a year without me or him knowing. And he told you about Paul.” Steve nods. “Paul was in and out a lot at first, made me suspicious. Thought he was up to no good and just using Wayne as a place to sleep when he wasn’t in the truck. But then he took me with him a few times over the summer and we got closer. I don’t think Wayne even knows how much that man loved him. He was gonna start working more local jobs sooner until I came into the picture and Wayne was struggling to keep up with bills. Long haul makes more money, so he stayed out. Made sure I had clothes and school supplies, made sure I ate three meals a day and had whatever snacks I wanted. Sent payments to the electric company before Wayne even got the bill so I never had to worry about sleeping through alarms or not being able to take a hot shower.”

Steve didn’t realize he was crying until Eddie reached his thumb up to wipe away a tear.

“He was my father in the ways that mattered to me, just like Wayne has been. Losing him was more painful than anything I feel about my dad dying now. All I feel now is guilt that I feel anything at all.”

Steve uses the arm wrapped around Eddie’s waist and the weightlessness the water allows to lift him up and guide his legs around his waist. He’s looking up at the man he loves, holding the back of his thighs, and wishing he could take every shitty feeling away with his words of comfort.

“You can feel however you feel. I’ll love you through it all,” Steve reassures him. Eddie’s breath catches at his words, and Steve knows he chose the right thing to say at the right time. “No one who cares about you is gonna judge you for having any emotion about your dad dying. If you wanted to stand in the middle of a table in the cafeteria at the school and cheer, I’d sit at the table and cheer you on. If you want to show up at his grave and scream and cry, I’ll hold your hand the whole time. So will Wayne. And so would Paul.”

Eddie sobs as he wraps his arms around Steve’s neck and hides his face against Steve’s neck. Steve can feel the wetness of his tears, can feel his own still falling into the water below. He doesn’t care how long they stay like that, doesn’t even care if this is all they do all night.

But only a few minutes later, Eddie is pulling back and looking down at Steve, hands playing with the wet ends of his hair.

“I didn’t expect any of this this weekend,” he admits. “I should learn to stop having expectations.”

Steve’s lips turn up in a half-smile as Eddie rests his forehead against his. “Better or worse than what you expected?”

Eddie snorts. “Better. Always better with you.”

Steve’s glad it’s dark enough to hide his blush, but he’s sure Eddie knows what he does to him by now. If he doesn’t, he will soon enough.

Eddie traces a line along Steve’s neck, gently poking at his moles as he watches his own movements. Steve holds him, lets him do what he wants, feels every touch like lightning.

“I love you,” he finally says, barely more than a whisper, like he’s unsure it’s okay, even after Steve’s confession. “I think I have for a while.”

Steve wants to kiss him, but this moment still feels like a part of Eddie’s monologue. He wants Eddie to lead now, to show him how to love him. Whatever he needs, Steve will give it willingly and gladly.

“How long until Wayne comes to make sure we didn’t drown?” Eddie asks.

“Probably not unless we’re still gone by morning.”

“As lovely as being in your arms all night sounds, I don’t know if I’d wanna stay in the water that long,” Eddie laughs as his legs tighten around Steve’s waist. Their mostly soft cocks brush against each other, making them both inhale loudly. “A little longer might not be so bad, though.”

Steve’s finding it harder not to kiss him, not to let his hands wander from Eddie’s thighs, up to his waist, back to his ass. He resists, but Eddie shifts his weight again and everything gets harder.

“You’re killing me.” Steve groans, letting his head fall back so he can look up at the stars in the sky instead of the ones in Eddie’s eyes.

“Look at me.” Eddie’s tone’s shifted to something serious, still adorned with an affection Steve can’t believe he gets to hear. Steve looks at him with his lips parted and unblinking eyes. “I wanna be yours. Will you let me?”

Steve nods. That’s all he can do.

Eddie’s lips are against his, gently coaxing them apart further so he can slip his tongue inside. Steve’s not even thinking about how he hasn’t brushed his teeth or eaten a mint since supper, the warmth of Eddie’s hands circling behind his back and rubbing his shoulders enough of a distraction even without his tongue gliding against the roof of his mouth.

Eddie’s hands are slow, but on a very clear path downwards as his tongue traces Steve’s bottom lip. Steve lets his own hands slip to Eddie’s lower back, lets a finger trace up and back down his spine.

Eddie shivers in his arms.

“Cold?” Steve whispers.

Eddie shakes his head. “Feels good.”

So Steve does it again, with more pressure, hoping Eddie gets the hint.

When Eddie’s hips grind forward, he knows he did.

They’re both nearly fully hard now, lips meeting again, hungrier and biting. Their moans vibrate between their chests, every movement rippling the water around them.

Eddie’s rocking his hips back and forth, friction against their cocks not quite enough to do more than get them more worked up.

The water doesn’t feel cool anymore, Steve’s body already adjusted to the temperature the moment Eddie’s hands were on him.

“Can I touch you?” Eddie asks, bringing Steve out of his thoughts about doing this in his pool when they got home. His hand is flat against Steve’s stomach, fingertips dragging through his happy trail.

“Want you to feel good too, love,” Steve trails one of his hands to Eddie’s front, stopping for a moment on the angry scars covering his side. “Together?”

Eddie slides impossibly closer, wrapping his hand around both of their cocks at once. Steve’s legs would’ve buckled without the help of the lake holding him up.

“Together is good,” Eddie smirks as his hand works them both over, squeezing at the tip the way Steve likes.

Steve had every intention of helping, but he’s doing all he can to keep his feet on the sandy ground and Eddie’s legs wrapped around his waist. He whimpers as Eddie leans in to kiss him slowly, a contradiction to his hand speeding up around them.

“Eddie, I’m…close.” Steve pants against his lips when he pulls back for air. His toes are curling in the sand below, and the small waves around them are splashing against their necks as Eddie’s hand moves faster. Steve’s bucking up into his touch, doesn’t care how desperate he seems.

“Me too, Stevie.” Eddie reassures him, just as breathless as Steve is.

Despite the words spoken and the increasing heat coiling in his belly, Steve gasps in surprise when he comes. He’s even more surprised when Eddie is right behind him, whispering Steve’s name repeatedly as his grip around them tightens then loosens.

Chests heaving, legs shaking, they stare at each other in the glow of the moonlight.

“I normally last a lot longer,” Steve breaks the silence.

Eddie breaks into loud laughter, head falling onto Steve’s shoulder before he realizes that the water is too high to do that without getting wet. He drops his legs and stands, keeping his arms wrapped around Steve’s waist for stability.

“New record for me, too, baby.”

“Next time, we’ll take our time.” Steve promises not only Eddie, but himself. He knows he has better self control than what Eddie just witnessed.

“You wanna head inside and take our time there?” Eddie’s smirking at him, fingers playfully teasing his sides under the water.

“Not sure I can be quiet enough.”

“Even if you bite a pillow?” Eddie pouts.

“I can be pretty loud,” Steve laughs, poking his bottom lip back to normal. “Plus, I’d like to be in one of our own beds when we ma- have sex.”

“Oh my god. Were you gonna say make love?” Eddie is squeezing his arms around him, lifting Steve up so most of his chest is out of the water. Steve’s hands rest against his shoulders, fingertips pruned from being in the water for a while.

“Maybe I was.” Steve knows he’s a sap. He doesn’t care if Eddie thinks it’s silly or stupid, but he does wanna avoid blowing this before it even has a chance to begin.

Eddie must see something in his eyes to keep him from pushing it more. He lets him back down slowly, soft smile on his face.

“I love that you care that much.” Eddie kisses the corner of Steve’s mouth. “I promise we’ll hold off on making love until we’re back home.”

Steve smiles shyly back at him.

“But I wouldn’t be opposed to getting my mouth on you after we shower.”

Steve smacks Eddie’s arm and rolls his eyes.

“You’re ridiculous. I love you.”

“You really do, don’t you?” Eddie sounds awestruck, like it’s suddenly hit him that this is happening, that Steve feels this much for him.

“I really do.”

🎸🎸🎸🎸🎸🎸🎸

Waking up in Steve’s arms for the second morning in a row felt too good to be true.

Most of this trip had felt too good to be true. Last night definitely felt like a dream.

He lets his eyes track over Steve’s bare chest, his neck, his lips pouting out as he sleeps. His eyelids are fluttering, but he’s still asleep, probably coming out of a dream.

Eddie’s fingers trace what’s left of the scar around his neck, touch light enough that Steve wouldn’t feel it in his sleep. He thinks about Steve’s bravery, how he dived head first into everything, be it protecting people from monsters or falling in love. Eddie knows Steve went without medical care after most run-ins in the Upside Down, and had only gotten some last time when Wayne insisted he do so while Eddie was in surgery.

The neck scars faded after they were patched up by a nurse, but many of his other wounds were deeper and infected, leaving a permanent reminder on his back and sides much like Eddie’s.

He traced along the outer lines of one of the scars shaped like a heart on his chest. Steve insisted it was just a weird oval, but Eddie insisted that it was a heart over his heart.

His chest hair has grown back in around it, nearly covering it up if you didn’t look close enough.

Eddie is close enough now.

It’s definitely a heart.

“Not sure how I feel about you staring at my chest that close,” Steve’s raspy voice fills his ear and he looks up to see Steve’s sleepy eyes looking at him. “Max at least had the decency to look from a distance.”

“Ha.” Eddie fake laughs. “I was just admiring your bountiful chest hair and the heart you wear on your sleeve.”

“It’s not a heart,” Steve groans as he covers Eddie’s head with his arms, pulling him on top of him. “You’re just blinded by love.”

“Who knew I’d be the optimist in this relationship?” Eddie breathes against Steve’s lips.

“Probably everyone who’s ever seen me in a relationship.” Steve kisses him quick, just a peck. “Let me up.”

“You’re the one who put me here.” Eddie doesn’t move. “Take me with you if you need to go so badly.”

“Eds, c’mon. I gotta brush my teeth.”

“So do I.”

Steve sighs. Eddie smiles.

“Fine.”

As Steve stands from the bed, Eddie wraps his legs around his waist, a mirror image to their time in the lake. Eddie’s not actually expecting Steve to carry him more than a few steps, but he blushes when he makes it all the way to the bedroom door.

“Still wanna come with me?” Steve raises his eyebrows like he knows Eddie didn’t expect him to take it this far.

“Can you seriously carry me down the hall?”

Steve stares blankly back at him. “I carried you for almost a mile when we got out of the Upside Down.”

“Touché.”

Steve manages to open the door with one hand before it goes back to Eddie’s leg, hoisting him up further so he has a better grip. Eddie just stares down at Steve’s face in amazement.

“Hey Wayne,” Steve says as they pass Wayne’s room. “Sleep okay?”

“Uh huh. There a reason you’re carrying the prince?” Wayne asks, causing Eddie to turn his head and scowl. “Wake up grumpy?”

“Woke up lazy.” Steve responded as he continued on the journey to the bathroom.

Once there, Steve set Eddie down on the floor and handed him his toothbrush. They brush their teeth together, smiling when they catch each other's eye in the mirror.

“Will you kiss me for real now?” Eddie asks after they’ve finished.

“Are you gonna walk to the kitchen by yourself or will I have to carry you?” Steve retorts.

“Your kiss will give me the power to make it.”

Steve snorts a laugh and leans in, his palm resting against Eddie’s jaw to pull him the last inch or so. The kiss is nothing like their back and forth. Steve consumes him, and Eddie lets him.

He doesn’t know how long they stand there, but he thinks it must be longer than they should.

Wayne clears his throat from the doorway. “Didn’t realize this was a part of brushin’ teeth these days.”

Eddie leaps away from Steve, panicked at the thought of Wayne knowing suddenly. He’s been out to Wayne for so long, he forgets that others probably aren’t comfortable being so open. Steve especially, who’s mentioned before that he wasn’t sure if he wanted to come out to everyone until he was sure they’d be okay with it.

“Relax, Ed. I clocked Steve months ago.” Wayne pushes past them to grab his toothbrush and toothpaste. “Move your relations outta here.”

“Relations?” Eddie gags. “Way to ruin the moment.”

“Sorry to ruin your delicate sensibilities. Get out.”

Steve pushes Eddie out of the small bathroom before he can respond. Eddie decides to focus on Steve’s hands on him instead of arguing further.

“Should we make breakfast?” Steve asks as they walk back to the bedroom to get dressed.

“I shouldn’t ever touch an oven, but I’ll watch you lovingly while you make breakfast, darling,” Eddie bats his eyelashes at Steve, who throws his shirt at him. “That’s not very nice. Did I not, and I quote, suck the soul-“

Steve’s hand covers his mouth while he sputters to cover Eddie’s voice from traveling out of the room.

“Jesus, the mouth on you.”

“That’s what you said last night.” Eddie’s words are muffled under Steve’s hand, but they both laugh. “I can make toast.”

“I’ll make the rest.”

Eddie spends the morning touching Steve as much as possible.

He spends the afternoon sneaking kisses and holding him in the hammock set up on the porch thanks to Wayne’s creativity.

He spends the evening watching Wayne and Steve fish while he drinks a beer and hands them whatever they need.

This is a peace that may only last until they leave tomorrow, but something tells him that this is only the beginning of a future Eddie never could’ve pictured for himself.

🎣🎣🎣🎣🎣🎣

five years later

Wayne slams the truck door a bit harder than he means to. The rain just started coming down harder and he wanted to get his bag in the cabin before it got worse.

When he enters the front door, the scent of freshly baked cookies wafts through the air and he smiles.

“Made it, boys!” He yells, though he’s pretty sure speaking at a normal volume would’ve been enough. The cabin hasn’t changed much, but Steve insisted on opening up the front portion so it felt more welcoming.

“Wayne!” Steve exclaims as he pops up from behind the counter of the kitchen. “You just missed Eddie. He went out to the trail.”

Wayne gives Steve a tight hug. At Steve’s frown, he laughs. “Sorry ‘bout the wet clothes. Started raining the last couple miles in and got heavier just as I was leavin’ the truck.”

“Oh no.” Steve groaned.

Just as he spoke, the back door slammed open and Eddie dropped his camera bag on the floor.

Wayne and Steve both took in the sight of him, drenched from head to toe, dripping onto the tile floor, and laughed.

“I hate the outdoors.”

“You’re a nature photographer. You hate the rain.” Steve walks over to him, still laughing under his breath. He picks up the bag before leaning in to kiss his cheek.

Wayne watches the exchange, fighting tears back at the reason he was invited to their cabin this weekend.

Eddie was proposing to Steve and wanted Wayne to be there to capture it with his camera. He didn’t care that Wayne was an old man who could barely operate a camera, he just wanted someone to do it.

He knew Eddie was also a little nervous and having Wayne there would help keep him calm.

Why he was nervous, Wayne didn’t know.

They couldn’t legally get married, but they might as well be anyway.

“Wayne!” Eddie bounces over to him and throws his arms around him, forgetting for a moment that he’s soaked. “You’re here!”

“I’m here. I’d like to be less wet, though.”

Eddie backs up and Wayne pats his shoulder.

“Both of you should go get changed. Dinner’s ready in ten minutes.” Steve interrupts on his way to put Eddie’s camera bag in their room.

“Yes, dear,” Eddie replies. Steve turns and glares for a moment before continuing on his way. Once he’s out of sight, Eddie sighs. “God, I love that man.”

“That’s why I’m here, ain’t it?” Wayne playfully shoves at Eddie’s arm. “We better listen to him. I’m starvin’ and I think he’d make us fend for ourselves if we show up at the table dripping wet.”

As Wayne changes, he can hear Steve laughing in their room, Eddie talking about something he saw outside in the usual dramatic way he spoke. He thinks back to the first time he brought his boys here together, how hushed they tried to be, how hesitant.

He looked over at a photo Eddie framed for this room so Wayne had something when he came to stay.

Paul was smiling at the camera, arm wrapped around Eddie’s shoulders, Wayne looking at both of them with a smile. He remembers laughing right after the picture was taken, and giving in and buying them both cotton candy. They insisted it wouldn’t make them sick, then proceeded to both rush to the nearest garbage can after they got off the Gravitron at the fair.

“Wayne! Steve’s bullying me!” Eddie yells.

“You probably deserve it!” He yells back.

“Unbelievable!” Eddie screams.

“Ha!” Steve yells.

Wayne shakes his head as he makes his way out to the chaos he chose to be a part of this weekend.

[hbyrde36]

Caught in the Undertow

Chapter Three

Ch 1 Ch 2 <-

WC: 4769 | R: Explicit | TW: Suicidal ideation, depression | Ch 3/10 | AO3

Note: Trigger warnings apply very strongly to this chapter, and it is probably the heaviest chapter of the fic.

~Steve~

Steve had been a little on edge all day. 

He kept trying to convince himself that it wasn’t a big deal, that tonight would be just like any other post Upside Down fuckery get-together, nothing whatsoever to get worked up over.

But it was no use.

It was a big deal. Tonight would be the first time any of them had set eyes on Eddie since the night they’d killed Vecna—since the night they’d almost lost the other boy for good. 

Assuming he actually showed. 

Steve almost couldn’t believe it when Dustin called saying Eddie had finally come to the phone, and not only spoke to him but agreed to a party. 

It seemed like a huge step after he’d so thoroughly cut them all off. Because no matter how many times Steve had told Dustin to give it time, that everyone heals from trauma in their own way, at their own pace, Steve knew that’s exactly what Eddie had done—he just didn't understand why.

It gave him a bad feeling about the night to come.

Still, the relief at hearing that Eddie had finally reached out to one of them, that Steve might finally get to see him whole and well after keeping him alive through sheer force of will alone, only to have Eddie ripped away from him at the hospital never to be seen again…

It had been enough to send him to his knees.

The phone rang, pulling Steve from his thoughts and forcing him to stop wiping the already clean kitchen counter to answer. It had to be Robin. He’d known this would happen. She swore she’d get her mom to drop her off for once so he wouldn’t have to venture out when Jonathan and Nancy were already picking up the kids.

"Hey, Rob. You need a ride after all?"

"Steve?” A voice that was definitely not his best friend’s came over the line. “It's Wayne."

"Oh! Mr. Munson. I thought—"

"Boy,” Wayne huffed, and Steve could practically feel him shaking his head. “How many times are you gonna make me say it?"

"Sorry—Wayne,” Steve corrected himself. He didn’t think he’d ever get used to calling the older man by his first name, it just wasn’t how he was raised, but Eddie’s uncle seemed hell bent on making sure he did. 

"That's better."

"Is everything okay? Is Eddie...?" Steve clutched the phone with both hands, willing the knot forming in his stomach to go away. He could only assume either something had happened, or Wayne was calling to tell him Eddie wasn’t coming after all. 

"He's fine,” Wayne was quick to reassure him. “As fine as he’s been, at least. He's in the shower now getting ready to head over to your place. I can't tell you how happy I am that he's finally going to see some of his friends."

"Me too. I… I know the kids miss him."

“Right,” Wayne huffed a laugh. "You say that as if you’re not a kid yourself."

Steve wasn’t sure if he was imagining the double meaning or not, but decided to ignore it.

“I guess I just haven't felt like one in a long time.” 

Wayne hummed in understanding. "I hope it’s not too much to ask, but keep a close eye on Ed tonight, will ya? I know this is a good thing. Him getting out of the house feels like the first step towards him living his life again, but… well, you know I worry."

"It’s no problem," Steve said immediately. 

As if that hadn’t already been his plan for the evening.

“Thank you, Steve. Oh, and I think maybe it’d be best if we don’t let on to Eddie that we’ve been talking. He might take it the wrong way, like we been talking bad about him behind his back. Would you mind keeping it between you and me?” 

They sort of had been talking about him behind his back, but it wasn’t like that. It wasn’t malicious. And Steve knew there were things Wayne didn’t share. Half the time the older man simply told stories about Eddie growing up.

“I won’t say a word, promise.”

Steve's camaraderie with Eddie's uncle wasn’t something he ever could have predicted coming out of all this.

Wayne had been understandably skeptical when he learned that his nephew had been found, and his life saved by a group of kids, and that that group had included one Steve Harrington. 

Steve’s dad and Wayne had to be roughly the same age, and Richard Harrington had long held a reputation for being a stuck up asshole. Steve also had no idea what tales Eddie might have come home telling about his own asshole years, so he could hardly blame the man for being wary when they’d first met in the hospital’s waiting room. 

Regardless of his concerns, Wayne had still looked Steve’s number up in the phonebook and called, on one of the rare days he wasn’t already there haunting the halls of Hawkins General, to tell him that Eddie had finally woken up. Though at the time he still wasn’t allowed visitors.

They wound up talking on the phone for more than an hour, until Wayne ran out of change.

Steve couldn't tell Eddie’s uncle anything about the Upside Down or Vecna, for fear of violating the NDAs they’d all signed years ago, even if Brenner was dead now, and no one had shown up yet this time around to demand their continued silence. And to his surprise the older man didn't push, almost like he knew there were things Steve wasn’t allowed to share no matter how much he might want to. 

He did explain, in the most sanitized version of events possible, that he and the others had been with Eddie the whole time. Trying to protect him, to hide him from the citizens that were hell-bent on hunting him down, while also dodging the advances of the real killer. And when the worst had happened, he—Steve, had done CPR, refusing to let Eddie succumb to his injuries.

It was all the truth he could offer, and really it wasn’t that far off. Wayne had cried quietly into the receiver, though they both pretended he hadn’t, and couldn’t seem to thank Steve enough. 

Steve went on to tell him about the boathouse. How he hadn’t really known Eddie that well in school, but that even after the other boy had threatened him with a broken bottle to his neck, he quickly realized that everyone had it wrong. Under all the leather and chains, and loud brashness, Eddie was sensitive, kind, and wouldn’t hurt a fly unless provoked. 

He even went so far as to say that he hoped, once the dust settled anyway, that he and Eddie could get to know each other better. Not the most damning of statements, but still more than he’d really meant to share. Steve wasn’t sure what had possessed him to be so honest. There was just something about Wayne Munson that made him feel comfortable and safe.

They spoke every single day after that. Either on the phone, or more often in person when both of them were camped out in the hospital’s waiting room with a revolving cast of others. 

It’d been hard to hear that Eddie didn’t want to see anyone. 

Wayne hadn’t said those exact words, of course, but it wasn’t hard for Steve to read between the lines. The entire group of them, not just those who had fought against Vecna from Hawkins, but Mike, El, Will, Jonathan, Jonathan’s friend Argyle who had inexplicably stuck around after driving the rest of them cross country in his pizza van— even though some of them had never even met Eddie, they all rushed to the hospital when word came down that their friend’s name had finally been cleared. His restrictions lifted.  

Dustin took it the hardest, refusing to go home because if Steve wasn’t leaving, then why did he have to go? And Steve couldn’t really argue with that, he’d done this to himself. Thankfully Claudia showed up eventually and didn’t give her son the choice.

Steve continued to talk to Wayne often, still went to the hospital nearly every day, even though it was clear that reports on Eddie’s progress from his uncle would be all the proof of life he’d get. Wayne was always checking in on Steve too, asking if he was eating, sleeping, that sorta thing. It was kind of nice having an adult fuss over him like that, he’d almost forgotten what it was like.

-

Robin grabbed Steve by the hem of his polo, forcibly pulling him into the kitchen where Nancy, Jon, and Argyle were hanging out.

“Hey, watch it!” Steve yanked himself out of her grip, straightening his shirt. 

Robin leaned in close to whisper. “You have to stop staring, dingus. You’re going to freak him out.”

Steve scoffed, keeping his own voice low. “As if he’s even looked in my direction once.”

“I know Wayne asked you to look out for him tonight, but don’t you think you’re taking it a little too seriously?”

“I told you that in confidence!” Steve hissed under his breath. 

“Just relax. He seems fine to me.” Robin patted him on the arm and turned to join Nancy in her discussion about studying for finals.

She wasn’t wrong exactly. Eddie did seem fine—with everyone else. 

Eddie had been the last to arrive and Steve worried at first that it might be too much, walking into a house full of people and being inundated by the likes of Mike and Dustin. He’d even said as much to the younger teens when they heard the squealing of brakes as Eddie’s van pulled up, warning them not to overwhelm him with questions or say anything about the hospital. 

And for a moment Steve thought he’d been wrong. 

Eddie came through the door, dimples on display, all big stupidly pretty smiles, a bit crooked now from the still healing scar near his mouth, but that only drew Steve’s attention to his lips more. 

He hugged Dustin, reintroduced himself to Jonathan, who of course remembered him from school, met Argyle and El, and greeted everyone else one by one. 

Everyone but Steve. 

No one else seemed to notice the oversight, and Steve, not wanting to make a big deal out of it, proceeded to quietly brood in the corner, taking breaks only to freshen his beer so he’d have something to do with himself while he observed—not stared, Robin.

The longer he watched, the more convinced he became that Eddie wasn’t as okay as he was pretending to be. His already lithe frame looked even thinner now. He was swimming in his usual ripped jeans and faded Black Sabbath t-shirt. No, Steve still didn’t know who they were, but he could read damnit. And there was something in the set of Eddie’s shoulders, the way he clenched his jaw, balling his hands into fists when he thought no one was looking, a tightness around his eyes—eyes with dark bruising below that spoke of many sleepless nights.

Or maybe Steve was overreacting. Maybe this was just what happens when someone is recovering from almost dying in a hell dimension. Maybe it was a good thing Robin had pulled him away before he could do or say anything to embarrass himself. 

Steve wasn’t sure how long he’d been milling about the kitchen making awful small talk with his ex-girlfriend, her boyfriend, and her boyfriend’s stoner best friend when Eddie came stumbling into the kitchen, Robin following close behind with wide eyes on her way back from the bathroom.

Eddie mumbled out an apology to no one as he banged into the counter before finding his way to the fridge where he took out a beer, and proceeded to down it in one go with the door still hanging wide open in front of him. 

Steve shared a baffled look with Robin. There was no way Eddie had gotten that drunk off of the two, now three beers, he’d had since he arrived. He had to have started before he got there, or broken into Steve’s dad’s liquor cabinet in the office. 

“Hey, Eddie… um, do you think maybe you should slow down?” Steve said cautiously, taking a tentative step towards the other boy as he popped open yet another beer. 

At least he closed the refrigerator door this time.

“That an order, King Steve?” Eddie slurred out, looking Steve in the eye for the first time all evening. He swayed into Steve’s space, poking a finger into his chest. “How about you just mind your own fucking business for once, and leave me alone.”

Eddie’s words were biting, vicious, and Steve found himself taking a step back, holding his hands up as if surrendering. This time it was Nancy he exchanged a quick glance with. She looked just as confused as he felt, brows tightly furrowed, bottom lip trapped between her teeth.

“Man, that’s—that’s not—” Steve began, floundering for what to say. He didn’t understand what was happening, why Eddie was so angry. He thought they’d moved past high school reputations after everything. “I just don’t want to see you get sick or something.”

“Whatever,” Eddie made a dramatic show out of rolling his eyes, before fumbling in his pockets and pulling out his keys. “I’m outta here.”

When Steve hesitated, afraid to make it worse, Robin walked right up to Eddie and snatched the set of keys out of his hand. “Oh no you don't. No way we’re letting you drive like this.”

“Fine, I’ll walk!” Eddie snapped, moving to step around her, but found Jonathan his path.

“You can’t walk all that way, man,” Jonathan said.

“Watch me,” Eddie spun on his heel, nearly fell when he lost his balance, and almost ran into Nancy who had moved to block the other way out of the kitchen.

“There’s still people out there who are after you, Eddie. It’s not safe," she said.

Eddie laughed, but it was an unsettling, hollow sound, devoid of any actual humor. He looked at them all in turn with dull eyes. “Jesus H. Christ. What a meddling pack of fucking do-gooders you are. So what if they’re after me. Who cares?”

“I do,” Steve blurted out, unable to keep his mouth shut any longer. “We all do. We’re your friends, Eddie. Of course we care.”

Eddie scoffed, shaking his head as he rounded on Steve again. “Yeah, sure.”

“Look, I’ve got a guest room, why don’t you sleep it off and you can drive home in the morning.”

“You just looove telling people what to do, don’t you?” Eddie crooned, mockingly. “Maybe I don’t want to sleep it off.”

Robin moved to stand between them, facing Eddie. “What is your problem, huh?” 

“You wanna know what my problem is?” Eddie asked, tilting his head, pointing an accusing finger behind her. “Him. He’s my problem.”

Steve had a horrible sinking feeling in his gut, but he tried to push it aside. It could be that Eddie was just an angry drunk or something, in which case, trying to reason with him right now was pointless, but he still had to ask.

“I don’t understand, Eddie. What did I do?” 

“You should have fucking left me there!” 

Everyone froze, the kitchen falling absolutely silent in the wake of Eddie’s words. Steve watched as all the blood drained from the other boy’s face, leaving him more ghostly pale than ever. 

Eddie took a stumbling step back from Robin, pushing past Jonathan, who didn’t try to stop him this time, and took off. Steve listened for the sound of the front door opening and closing but it never came. Instead he heard a door slam down the other end of the hall where the bathroom was, and realized that Robin still held Eddie’s van keys in her hand.

The raised voices of Dustin and Max filtered in from the other room, snapping the group of older teens back to life.

“Shit,” Steve ran his hands roughly through his hair. “You don’t think the kids heard any of that do you?”

Argyle jumped into action, peeking his head around the doorway that separated the kitchen from the living room before turning back with an easy smile. “Nah, the little dudes are like, fully engrossed in arguing about what movie to watch, they’re fine.”

Steve raised his face to the ceiling, letting out the breath he’d been holding. Robin wrapped an arm around his waist, pressing her cheek into his arm.

“Nance, do you think you guys could drive everyone home?” Steve asked.

Nancy shrugged. “Yeah, yeah I guess, but… what are you going to do?”

“I’m not sure, but it feels like this is my fault somehow,” he said, leaning his head down against Robin’s for a moment, taking the comfort she offered while he could. He had a feeling the night wasn’t going to get any better from here. “So I should be the one to fix it.”

They told the kids that Eddie wasn’t feeling well, and had gone upstairs to lay down and needed quiet. They weren’t thrilled about getting kicked out, denied their big group sleepover, but Steve promised a raincheck and that seemed to smooth things over. 

Dustin lagged behind when the others split off into Nancy’s car and Argyle’s van, shooting suspicious looks between Steve and Robin. “I’m not stupid, I know something’s wrong. Something you're not telling me.”

“Do you trust me, Henderson?”

“You know I do.” Dustin scowled. “But you can’t treat me like a kid forever.”

Steve drew him into a tight hug. “I know, just… let me handle this one, okay?”

“You’ll take care of him?” Dustin asked, voice muffled where his face was pressed to Steve’s chest.

“Yeah, buddy. It’s gonna be okay. I’ll call you tomorrow, I promise.” 

Robin was the last to go, hovering in the open doorway while Nancy’s car idled out front.

“Are you sure you don’t want me to stay?”

Steve would have loved for her to stay, to hold his hand through whatever the hell was about to happen, but he had a feeling he had a better chance of getting Eddie out of that bathroom without a crowd. And if Eddie wanted to keep taking his anger out on Steve, well, he could handle it, and at least no one else would have to hear. 

“I’ll be alright.”

“Are you going to call Wayne?” She asked.

He’d already been waffling back and forth about calling the older man. He didn’t want to worry Eddie’s uncle even more than he already was, but he might not have a choice.

“If I say yes, will you go?”

Robin elbowed him hard in the side before throwing her arms around his neck. “What Eddie said, Steve… I-I don’t like the sound of that.”

Steve swallowed hard around the growing lump in his throat. “Me either.” 

-

Steve approached the bathroom slowly, wrapping his arms around himself when he heard Eddie sobbing through the closed door, so sorrowful and loud that he could practically feel the other boy’s pain. 

Steve’s heart broke.

He took a deep breath, steeling himself before knocking softly on the hollow wood.

The sound of Eddie’s cries was choked off abruptly, replaced with a muffled whimper. Steve could imagine clear as day the other boy sitting in there with a hand thrown over his own mouth, desperately trying to stifle the sound. 

Steve squeezed his eyes shut, taking more deep even breaths as he bowed his head. He was intimately familiar with bathroom floor breakdowns, and not just the one he and Robin now looked back on with an odd fondness, the moment they became them. He’d spent more than one night on a cold tile floor. After the first demogorgon, after the tunnels, the Russians and the mind flayer, and just a few weeks ago, after Vecna—after Eddie.

Steve sat, pulling his knees to his chest, resting his back against the door frame.

“It’s just me, Eddie. Everyone else is gone. Do you… do you want to come out and talk? Or I could come in there?” 

“Go away, Harrington,” Eddie said weakly. 

“If you don’t want to talk, I could just sit with you.”

“Haven’t you done enough, King Steve? Just leave me alone, man.” Eddie's voice shook.

It was the same words he’d thrown in Steve’s face in the kitchen, but the sharp edges had been filed off.

Steve sighed, letting his head fall back against the door with a soft thunk. “Come on, Eddie. You know I'm not that guy anymore. I thought we had a moment back there, in the woods?” 

He still had no idea where this was coming from. What had he done to make Eddie hate him all of the sudden?

Eddie let out another humorless chuckle. “A moment? What am I—your fucking prom date, Harrington?”

“You know what I mean. I thought we had an understanding, that we agreed we were both different than the other expected.”

“What part of any of this has convinced you that I’m not exactly the freak everyone says I am?”

“You’re not a—”

Steve’s reply was cut off by a metallic clatter on the other side of the door. His stomach dropped, his mouth went dry, and his heart began hammering in his chest. It could be nothing more than the chains from Eddie’s jeans dragging on the floor, but if it wasn’t… 

Steve shot to his feet, trying the handle though he knew it’d be locked.

It was.

“Open the door, Eddie.”

“Fuck off.”

Steve jiggled the handle again. “Unlock this fucking door or I’ll break it down.”

Eddie scoffed. “You’re not gonna break your own door down.”

If Steve was right about what he thought might be happening in there, he’d do a lot worse than damaging a stupid door to stop it. 

“Try me.” 

Steve backed himself up, prepared to use his shoulder like a battering ram, when he heard the faint click of the lock disengaging.

The hinges squeaked as he pushed the door open carefully.

Eddie was huddled on the floor, wedged into the corner between the sink and the wall, curled in on himself. He rocked gently back and forth as he stared down at the knife gripped tightly in his hand. 

Steve kept his movements slow, kneeling down on the floor as far from Eddie as the cramped space would allow.

“I don’t want to be here anymore,” Eddie whispered.

Steve swallowed back a pained sound, blinking back tears as his fingers itched to reach for the other boy, to hold him. He might not be the smartest guy in the room, but he was absolutely sure that when Eddie said here he wasn’t talking about Steve’s house.

He inched forward, holding his hand out.

“Please give me the knife.”

Eddie’s eyes, red rimmed and puffy, shot up to meet his, and they still held so much anger—but also a hint of fear. He snarled, but released his grip on the blade, letting it drop to the tile between them.  

As Steve reached for it, retracting the blade and slipping it carefully into his pocket, he let his gaze roam over Eddie’s body, relieved to see no spots of blood on him or the floor. He wasn’t sure he could handle seeing Eddie part with his blood again. 

Eddie hugged his legs to his chest, tucking himself into an even tighter little ball, glazing at Steve as he rested his head on his knees. “Always think you know what’s best, don't you? Who put you in charge, why do you get to make that decision?”

“I don’t—I don’t know anything, man.”

Eddie’s eyes fell shut, sending fresh tears cascading down his cheeks. “Why couldn’t you just leave me down there, huh? I was as good as dead. It would have been easier, safer.”

Steve opened and closed his mouth several times. He didn’t know what he was supposed to say to that. He wanted to cry. He wanted to scream. He wanted to pull Eddie into his lap and never let go. 

Eddie sniffled loudly, wiping his face on his jeans. “I did what I did to keep Dustin safe, to make sure you had the chance to win, but I never planned on making it out of that place.”

Steve did reach out then, and surprisingly Eddie took his hand, letting Steve pull him to his feet—and didn’t let go. Eddie wouldn’t look at him, but he allowed himself to be led out of the bathroom, up the stairs, and all the way to the guest room where he finally let go, laying down on the bed to face the wall. 

Steve hovered in the doorway, a little afraid to leave the other boy alone, but he had no idea what he was doing. He was in way over his head here. He needed to call Wayne. 

“I’m not sorry that I saved your life,” Steve said quietly to Eddie’s back. “I could never be sorry for that, but I am sorry that you’re hurting.”

-

By the time Steve made it to the bottom of the stairs again he was a wreck, crying and shaking so badly that he almost dropped the phone as he dialed the Munson’s number from memory. 

“Hello?”

The moment the call connected Steve’s legs gave out, and he slid down the wall to sit on the kitchen floor, thankful for the phone’s long cord.

“Wayne…” Steve sobbed out the older man’s name.

“What’s wrong? Is Eddie…?” Wayne’s panicked voice came loudly through the receiver.

Steve pressed the phone hard into his ear. “He’s here. H-he’s laying down in my guestroom.”

“What happened?” 

“It’s… he… I can’t—I can’t—I can’t even say it.” Steve hiccuped, and his voice caught, his throat gone painfully tight.

“Breathe, son. It’s gonna be alright, but you gotta breathe. Go on—in and out, on my count.”

It took a few tries but Steve did his best to follow the man’s directions, concentrating on the sound of his voice as he counted off to five. Taking air into his lungs slowly, holding it for a beat, and blowing it out just as slowly until he felt a little less like he was going to pass out.

“That’s real good, Steve. You drop your head between your knees?”

He did, nodding as though the other man could see him.

“I’m sorry,” Steve whispered.

Wayne clicked his tongue. “Nothing to be sorry for. Do you think you can tell me what’s going on now?”

Again Steve nodded to no one but the floor and the empty room. 

“Eddie—he was drinking and I tried to get him to slow down, but he… he got so angry and then he said—” Steve cut himself off, unable to repeat the words, and skipped ahead to the worst of it. “He locked himself in the bathroom. I sent everyone else away, and I-I tried to talk to him, but… Wayne, he was in there, crying, holding that knife he carries.”

There was a sharp intake of breath on the other end of the line.

“Shit,” Wayne cursed softly. “I knew he was having a hard time, but I didn’t think…”

“I’m sorry.”

“Not your fault, kid. I just don’t know what to do, how to help him. I’m supposed to go back to work tomorrow night, I can’t afford any more time off. We might not owe on the trailer but there’s still bills to pay. I was already nervous about leaving him alone, and now—I can’t lose him, Steve.”

Steve didn’t even hesitate to make the offer. He’d been fired from the video store for missing too many shifts anyway.

“What if he stayed here with me for a while?”

“I can’t ask you to do that,” Wayne said.

“You didn’t, I’m offering. I’m not working right now, so I can be home with him all the time and maybe—I dunno, maybe I can get through to him.” 

There was a long pause before Wayne spoke again, where Steve was afraid the man would turn him down. "I know there’s things… stuff he can’t talk to me about, that he can talk to you about. Are you sure about this?”

“I’m sure, and I promise I won't let anything bad happen to him.”

“I know, son, you’re a good kid. Okay. Let me pack some of his things. I'll be there soon.”

Chapter 4

Thanks and love to @penny00dreadful and @pearynice for all your help and encouragement with this.

Permanent taglist(open): @penny00dreadful @pearynice @hitlikehammers @bookworm0690 @wonderland-girl143-blog 

@goodolefashionedloverboi @themagicalari @awkwardgravity1 @rocknrollsalad

[mikeyss1ut]

Can you do headcannons of fat! Reader x the outsiders?

Plus sized reader x greasers head cannons.

Warnings: cussing, mentions of fighting and bullying.

Includes: All greasers: Pony, Darry, Soda, Steve, Johnny, Two bit, Dallas.

PONYBOY CURTIS:

This boy does not give a FUCKKK about your looks.

If he likes someone, he likes them.

Also I feel like his type is chubby girls anyways so ur perfect for him !!!

If you’re getting bullied he’s gonna comfort you and tell you how perfect you are for him.

And he’ll probably get Darry or Dally on whoever was talking about your body!!

And they’ll do it too, cause Darry likes you and thinks your a good thing for Pony. And even though Dally won’t admit it (obvi) he’s just happy pony is happy and if that’s with you then so be it !!

Pony is literally head over heels in love with you idk what else to tell ya, he loves you!!!

DARRY CURTIS:

Bros so strong and can just lift you over his shoulder like it ain’t no big deal.

And any teasing from anyone about your weight will not go unnoticed and he will be beating the fuck out of whoever spoke a single bad word about you or your weight!!

And they will never ever dare to speak a bad word again because there so scared of Darry.

He honestly probably wouldn’t even bring up your weight that much and neither would anyone else. Cause he loves you and love is enough !!

SODAPOP CURTIS:

Ngl it’s not his type, but when he sees you it all of a sudden is his type!

Sodas kinda like pony in the sense that if he loves you like truly loves you he doesn’t care what you look like.

He’ll fight anyone who says a word about your weight, or anyone who questions his love for you.

But you know he loves you and that’s all that matters.

STEVE RANDLE:

He’d probably meet you at the DX and just like automatically fall in love with you.

It probably wouldn’t even register in his brain that you were a little bigger than what the beauty standard at the time was.

Steve thinks you’re perfect, like completely perfect in his eyes.

Also in my opinion Steve might be one of the most protective Greasers ever so he’s beating the ever loving SHITTT out of whoever speaks a bad word against you.

JOHNNY CADE:

In my eyes his type is thicker women. So he doesn’t give a fuck he likes you more!!

Heart eyes literally pop up when this man sees you I’m not even lying.

You’re like so perfect for him! Your kind, and nice, and just his type but also not so nice it’s exhausting.

If anyone’s picking on you.

Death.

No jk he’d probably wouldn’t throw punches but would throw out some really sassy man lingo if someone did it in front of him.

If it wasn’t in front of him he’d reassure you you’re perfect.

TWO-BIT MATTHEWS:

Y’all would’ve been friends and then started dating.

And he doesn’t even know when you guys become friends it’s like you just spawned in his life one day.

And two bit doesn’t care about looks when making a friend, if he likes you he likes you. It’s that simple.

I mean you being beautiful, amazing, show stopping definitely helped but he really doesn’t care.

He’ll be so upset if someone makes fun of your weight he’ll probably be getting the whole gang on the person !!

DALLAS WINSTON:

I’m gonna be so honest he probably bullied you for your weight in like elementary school.

And then you grew up and you were beautiful.

And he fell for you.

You told him to fuck off, and he didn’t even know why???

Mans was soooo confused.

And when you told him one day why you hated him, he felt bad.

But of course Mr tough wouldn’t let it show.

But one day he just like poured his sorrow out to you, and you fell for him too.

Now yall are in love! And even if he is Dallas Winston he does still love you and really you (Johnny and pony) only!

If someone bully’s you btw and he finds out you’re not gonna see him for a couple days cause he’ll be in jail for almost killing the guy!

[stranger-stardustt]

this one means forever

written for @steddiemicrofic ‘edge’ wc: 509| rated: T | cw: Suicide Attempt, Suicidal Thoughts | tags: childhood friends, post-canon, implied vampire!Eddie

Steve looked down at Lover’s Lake, heels digging into the gravel that held him from falling to his death. He stared at it, the moonlight reflecting off of the still water, like if he reached out he could scoop up a little piece of the stars and hold them in his hands. 

He thought back to years and years prior, to the day he made the death pact. To the day he met Eddie Munson. 

He had been 13, walking toward what he knew to be the direction of Skull Rock, barefoot after one of his parent’s fights. It was there that he ran into the other boy, who offered him a joint and a kind smile.

After a bit of talking, Steve confessed something he had never dared to mutter aloud before; the fact that he didn’t want to be alive. He broke into tears and Eddie consoled him, promising him it wasn’t worth it, that he shouldn’t go through with it.

“Why?” Steve had asked, staring into Eddie’s brown eyes, wide and comforting. “Why shouldn’t I?”

“Well,” Eddie replied, “for starters, we wouldn’t ever see each other again.” He smiled, throwing down his joint and grabbing Steve’s hands. “You’re like, the first person to be nice to me in a while. And I get what you’re feeling, ‘ya know? So how about this? If one of us decides we wanna die, the other one dies with them.”

Steve blinked at him, tears falling onto his pajama pants. “Why would we do that?”

“If neither of us have anything to live for,” Eddie said slowly, “why don’t we just live for each other?”

Now, Eddie was dead and gone. And for some odd reason, Steve found himself remembering that encounter that he should have forgotten about the moment he shut the other man out of  his life. But he hadn’t. Hadn’t forgotten, hadn’t given up on his oath.

He didn’t have anything to live for. Not anymore. 

Pulling himself away from the memory, Steve looked down at the water once again. He knew the moment he jumped, it would be done for. The impact of him hitting the water would break every bone in his body, and if it didn’t kill him, the freezing temperature of the lake would. There was no coming out of this alive. 

It was perfect.

Steve took a long, deep breath, the cold air around him filling his lungs. He placed his hand on his chest, running his fingers over the necklace that he hadn’t taken off since Eddie’s death in the Upside Down. It was a guitar pick, the one Eddie had used to distract the demobats. His last reminder of the man he had lost before he was even his. His last ounce of hope. 

His foot edged forward, toe of his shoe hanging over the cliff.  “Just do it,” he muttered to himself. “Just end it all.”

He leaned forward… and just as he did, someone caught him by the collar. “Steve,” they said, pulling him back.

Steve froze. “Eddie?”

[some-of-us-watch-the-sunset-too]

Can you do headcanons for the gang comforting you after you break up with your s/o of 4 years? 😢 it's your choice if you wanna add that they had a crush on you while you were dating that person or if they're just comforting you as friends! Thank you!

“He doesn’t deserve you”

A/N: i absolutely hate this tbh and went wayyyy off topic but anyway. this does reference the book a lot at the end so pretend bob was never killed by pony. i mean it’s hinted at that bob is the ex but still.

Tags: fluff, all the boys, big protective mama bear darry

Warnings: a bit of violence in this one.

“i really thought he was the one..” Y/N sat on the sofa in the Curtis house crying. “Y/N..i know you loved him, but he was never a good person. why do you think i wouldn’t let him around here? i knew from the start that something bad was going to happen but i didn’t have any reason to think that.” Darry sighed. “i should’ve told you though anyway.” Y/N wiped their eyes “No, no i get that. i just wish that i saw it. now he’s running around with that redhead Soc. why did i think he ever loved me?”

Just then, the rest of the gang piled in the door. “Who do i have to kill?” Steve and Dally said in sync. Y/N laughed. “We’re not going to kill anyone, i’m just going to hospitalise him.” they winked at the boys. there was a silence for a moment. “I think i’m gonna go for a quick walk. Dal come with me.” Darry announced, standing up. “will you be alright Y/N?” he looked back at them. “Yeah i’ll be alright.” they smiled before darry and dally walked out. Soda sighed “they’re gone to beat him up.” “I know” Y/N replied, way too cheerful. “im gonna follow them.” they stood up “Woah there cowboy(g/n) you really think that you can go storming out to beat your ex up?” Two-Bit put a hand on their shoulder. “yea i do. i hate his guts. That’s enough for me to be able to fight god never mind him” they snapped. Y/N quickly hugged Two before running out and down the street. After they ran out he froze. “SHIT.” Soda looked up at him “what?” Two turned to face him slowly. “Y/N took my blade..” It was now everyone else’s turn to freeze. “Shit.” they all said in union.

Meanwhile Darry and Dally were having a ‘chat’ with Y/N’s ex. by chat i mean they were completely kicking his ass. though neither of them had pulled a blade, they didn’t want to fight dirty no matter how angry they were. “Y/N is the sweetest, loyalest, most caring people you will ever meet. They’re like a sibling to me and when someone messes with my family, well, this is what happens to ya.” Darry hissed. Just then Y/N walked in. “Y/N! You’re here to stop them right?” Their ex fell to the ground, blood streaming down his face. It made Y/N feel slightly sick looking at him. “Dar, Dal. i think you got your point across. we don’t want a murder on our hands now do we?” Darry chuckled. “you really think i have that little self control? his nose isn’t even broken.” Y/N leaned down and helped their ex up. They hugged him. “This is what you get.” Before their ex could ask what they mean, Y/N drove the blade of Two-Bit’s blade into his stomach. “What..the fuck..” He whispered. Darry gasped, Dally smirked as if to say he expected it though you could see a glint of fear in his eyes. Y/N pulled the blade out and stuck it back in their pocket. “Dal, where did you say that church was? Windrixville was it?” they asked. “Y-Yea, windrixville.” dally stuttered. “well i guess i have a long journey ahead of me and hey, if they ask where i am say i’m going to Texas.” They wink before walking off into the night, leaving the two boys standing there, stunned.

[mishkatelwarriorgoddess]

You Don't Own Me

Mob!Bucky Barnes X F!Reader

AN: This is late to the game, but better late than never. It's for @caplanbuckybarnes #brokenheartsforcaplan writing challenge. It has taken me FOR-FREAKING-EVER to get this to this point, but I wanted to post it before my birthday next week. Anyway, I hope you enjoy it, and it may even end up as a small series.

You’d seen them all come into the club earlier, Bucky. Steve, Tony, Thor, Natasha, your Grandfather, and unfortunately your ex who had tried to kill you when you said ‘No’ to his proposal of merging families. They all had their people with them. But you knew that there were more who blended in with the crowd seamlessly.

            You had heard Sam say something to you, and that’s what snapped you out of your daydream and brought you back to looking at yourself in the mirror to finish your makeup.

            “What did you say?” You looked at him in the mirror as you applied your powder.

            “I asked if you thought that this was a good idea to do this TONIGHT. Ya know, with EVERYONE here?” His hands were flailing around, and his face betrayed the emotions he was feeling inside.

            “I can’t help that he decided to bring them HERE, out of all the clubs he owns in the city. I told him on Friday that if I didn’t have an answer from him about my ‘suggestion’ then he wouldn’t like MY answer back. What’s wrong Sam? You getting cold feet? I can always have Clint do the song with me if that’s the case.” You’d hit him right in his pride and ego, and he knew it. But it didn’t matter to him, he knew you drew in a lot of business since you’d been here the past year, so he wasn’t about to complain.

            “Clint can suck it! He’s not takin’ MY part of that song sugar!” and with a wink, he left you to finish getting ready for your set.

            You had to hand it to him, he was going out on a limb for you tonight. Sam ran the club, and it was he who had re-introduced the two of you after your first night on the stage. When Sam had taken you to Bucky’s VIP section, you were concerned that one of New York’s most notorious bosses was going to fire you.

            Much to your surprise, he complimented you on the set and asked if he could spend some time with you whenever he came to the club. You weren’t dumb enough to turn him down, and that’s how he had started courting you.

            He’d send you bouquets of sunflowers, daisies, and other simple flowers which then led to roses being delivered on the nights that you were in the club singing. There would always be a small note attached, in his chicken scratch that passed for handwriting, about something that the two of you had talked about or just to let you know that he was thinking about you. You kept reminding yourself that you couldn’t fall for him, and you had seen pictures of him with other girls; but that didn’t mean you listened, or it didn’t hurt. He said once that he didn’t want you in the spotlight where his enemies could find and use you against him.

            At first, it had made sense. He’d spend time with you at the club, and then he asked you to go away for a weekend with him to the country. What you hadn’t planned on what that he meant the ITALIAN countryside; but you got to surprise him when you got lost and found the small village of Tragliata while driving around Italy. The sun was starting to set, and you saw a group of nuns outside the church and had Bucky stop so you could ask for help.

            “Scusate sorelle, io e il mio amico ci siamo persi e dobbiamo ritrovare la strada per la Città del Vaticano. Ci aiutate per favore?” (Excuse me sisters, my friend and I are lost and need to find our way back to Vatican City. Could you help us please?) On the drive back to the hotel, Bucky held your hand and told you that he fell hard for you when you were asking the nuns for help in flawless Italian. The sparkle in his eyes when you tried to hide your burning cheeks told you that he wasn’t lying to you.

            But it seemed that good things don’t last long for you. And it seems that the men in your life sometimes find a way to reinforce this idea of yours. Your ex, who just so happened to be next in line in his family for taking over the business had treated you like a toy. He’d take you out with the family and business partners, but with his friends he said you were one of his ‘girls’. The final straw came when you found out that he had a contract out on you because he’d proposed to you and with how he treated you, you’d turned him down. He didn’t take too kindly to that, it seemed.

            And Bucky wasn’t going to be the exception. When you came back from your trip, he had some business meetings on nights that you had to sing at the club; so that meant things were almost back to the way they were before you left. Almost because now, he was only being seen in public with one woman, Sharon Carter, next in line to take over her Family business.

            ‘At least he didn’t bring her here to the club.’ Was all that you were thinking at the time.

            Then one night, Same came back to the dressing room to talk to you before you started your set. He was acting kinda weird, and you asked him what was wrong.

            “There’s no easy way to say this. Bucky’s here.”

            “And?????” you asked.

            “He’s not alone either.” Sam whispered.

            “Who is it?” you asked, even though you already knew.

            Sam wouldn’t tell you to confirm your suspicion, but that was when your plan had started to form.

            You were NOT about to be someone’s mistress, least of all a Mob bosses! You’d promised your Babcia that much when she had started asking you about him during your weekly phone calls. She had passed recently, and you weren’t about to break your ‘I’m an ass. Can we please talk?’ You smiled to yourself as you took in the heady scent of the flowers. Your last song that night was “Ain’t No Other Man” and you made sure he knew you were singing it for him. You joined him in the VIP section not long after you had changed to talk.

            “Doll, I’m sorry if I embarrassed you the other night.”

            “Jamie, embarrassed isn’t the word that I’d use. I was hurt and pissed off to tell you the truth.”

            “Hurt?!?!”

            “Yes, hurt. You told me that I was special, and that the other girls you were photographed with didn’t hold a candle to me. Was that the truth or are you just stringing me along here Barnes?”

            You knew that he HATED whenever anyone used just his last name. In his eyes, it was a metaphorical slap in the face and said that you didn’t respect him. But you had to make a point.

            His jaw ticked as he straightened his tie. “It wasn’t a lie, Doll. But like I said before…”

            “Yeah, I remember. You can’t take me out where people would see me and EXPOSE me to your enemies. YET you can dick around while you tell me what I can and can’t do!”

            “I’m confused Doll. What exactly is the issue here?”

            You just huffed out a breath, “You can’t be THAT clueless. Okay, let me make it crystal clear for you. You need to make a choice, blondie, or me.”

            “In my line of work, I don’t gotta choose Doll!” he laughed quietly.

            “Well, you have the weekend to decide if that’s your final answer. If I don’t hear from you BEFORE I go on stage Monday night, you may not like MY response.”

            “What could you do to ‘hurt’ me Doll? I own this place and everything in it. And by default, that includes you.” He stated as he grabbed you around your waist.

            “We’ll see.” You downed the scotch that he had in his hand and winked at him as you got up to go change for your last set of the night.

            Word had spread pretty fast in the club, and a good portion of Manhattan, that Buck’s ‘piece’ had given him an ultimatum. You figured he’d bring in the other bosses as a show of power to you. But you didn’t scare quite that easy. And he was forgetting that you came from Family!

            As you finished getting in your dress, there was a quiet knock on your door.

            “It’s open.” You called over your shoulder. Looking in your mirror you saw Natasha come into the room. She gave you a quick hug before looking over your outfit for the night.

            “Are you sure about what you’re doing?” she asked as she was helping with your zipper.

            “I know he’s gonna think that I’m just rolling over and accepting things Nat. But I can’t. He has to know that he may own this club, but not me.” You were doing your best to not dissolve into tears before you went out.

            “I’ll do my best to keep things from getting too crazy, just expect all hell to break loose after your song.”

            You gave her a hug as Sam opened the door to come get you for your set.

            “OOhhh girl!!! If I knew I wouldn’t die, I’d take his place TONIGHT!!! Just a head’s up too, we saw some of the HYDRA men come in, but no bosses with them. No one is going to fault you if you want to change things for tonight for your last song.” You knew he was giving you one last chance to back out of things, but your pride had been wounded that night. You couldn’t let that slide.

            “Sam, if I don’t hold him accountable now, and go back on my word to my Babcia, then I never will. Which means that I should just go back to Ohio and marry that good for nothing jerk who I believe is here tonight. But we both know he’d still find me and try to get me to come back. No. It’s got to be tonight.”

            Sam left quietly as he told you the band was ready whenever you were.

            You took a deep breath, said a quick prayer to your Babcia, and went out on stage.

            You went out and sang your usual songs for the first part of your set.

            As the band got ready for the last song, you decided to go for broke.

            “I’d like to thank you all for coming out tonight. This next song is dedicated to someone who needs to be reminded of something. You know who you are.” You looked back at the band, and out to Sam who was by the bar with his mic. He gave you a nod to let you know he was ready, and you gave the band a nod to start.

            The music started, and you noticed a few people were leaning forward in their seats as Sam started his part of the song. You used this time to make your way out to the middle of the floor, where you could strategically position yourself. You looked at Bucky, but as you started to sing, you turned around and faced your ex and put your hand on his shoulder.

            You don’t own me.

            I’m not just one of your many toys.

            You don’t own me.

            Don’t say I can’t go with other boys.

You turned to face where Bucky was sitting and sang your heart out.

            Don’t tell me what to do.

            And don’t tell me what to say.

            Please, when I go out with you,

            Don’t put me on display.

You opened your eyes and bore straight into Bucky’s as you continued singing.

            You don’t own me.

            Don’t try to change me in any way.

            You don’t own me.

            Don’t tie me down cause I’d never stay.

As Sam was singing his next part, you walked straight in front of where Bucky and all the other heads of the New York Families were sat. The only one you paid attention to was Bucky. He never moved, never blinked, and didn’t even drink the scotch he had in his hand. You’d hit a nerve, good is all you thought.

            I don’t tell you what to say.

            I don’t tell you what to do.

            So just let me be myself.

            That’s all I ask of you.

            I’m young, and I love to be young.

            I’m free, and I love to be free.

            To live my life the way I want.

            To say and do whatever I please.

            You made your way back to the stage as you sang the rest of the song. As you got back to the stage for the end of the song, you looked straight at Bucky and sang the final ‘You don’t own me’ looking at him. You could see his jaw ticking, and you felt that he wasn’t the only one who didn’t appreciate the song. You saw your ex and a couple of his men get up and leave once the lights went out on the stage.

            The club erupted in applause at that point, and you used this to go back to your dressing room to change into some more casual clothes before joining your Grandfather and his men.

To say that Bucky was upset was an understatement. He let you walk off stage and talking with the others that were in the VIP section with him. He leaned over to whisper something to Clint, then left the section to go back stage and talk with you.

When he got to your dressing room door, he knocked - but pulled his gun when the door swung open. The room was a shambles and there was no sign as to where you were. He roared for Sam and Clint, then slumped onto an ottoman to wait for them.

[quinnxsocials]

THE MASKED KILLER

BILLY X STU X READER FAN FIC

This is based on the 1996 SCREAM VER!

THIS IS PART ONE

ALL PARTS LINKED HERE ! : MASTERLIST

One Year Ago (almost)

“Sidney..?” Rose said knocking onto Sidney’s door, Sidney opened the door confused and when she saw Rose’s puffy and red eyes she knew something was wrong. “Oh my God are you okay Rose?” Sidney whispered and hugged her sister, “Mom is dead.” She cried holding onto Sidney. Sidney released the hug and looked at her with tears in her eyes, “w-what? You’re joking right…” Sidney replied back and when Rose shook her head Sidney looked side to side as tears fell down, Rose lead her to her parents room to see Rose was just about right. Their mother brutally murdered on the floor, they both cried harder and the police sirens were coming closer. When Sidney looked outside she saw someone wearing a jacket leaving her house, it had blood on it, and when she looked closer she realized the jacket belonged to no other than Cotton Weary.. Sidney screamed and immediately ran outside to find nobody, as the police came to the scene Sidney ran to Dewey. “Hey! Hey! What’s going on we got a call that your mother was killed!” Dewey said holding onto Sidney. “cotton weary.. he left the house in a jacket of blood! c-check his car I know it was him!” Sidney cried as Rose ran outside in tears. Both Sidney and Rose had blood on them, the death of their mother scared Rose. Which made her so introverted that she barely hung out with the friend group anymore, only Randy. And that’s when the bullying started from Casey Becker, the soon to be dead.

“You probably killed your mother because you’re a lame weird little bitch!” Casey said to Rose as she sat down in the lunch room, Rose looked up at her in shock. “Why would you say something like that?” Rose said her voice cracking, “Because you’re not so innocent! I know you’re a killer.” Casey replied and crossed her arms over her chest. “I didn’t kill her, that was my mother. I didn’t come out the house in a jacket of her blood, Cotton Weary did.” Rose replied angrily and stood up to Casey, “Pfft! Of course and why ya getting up gonna hit me and prove that I’m right that you’re psychotic and a murderer?” Casey laughed and taunted Rose, “Shut the fuck up you ugly Bob looking ass bitch you’re lucky I don’t beat the shit outta you because you’re with Stu. Test me again and I’ll break your jaw bitch.” Rose replied with serious intentions but that didn’t work on Casey. “Yeah okay, hit me bitch.” Casey replied, but before she could laugh Rose sent a hard punch to Casey’s jaw making her fall back to the ground and Rose just walked away as Casey started screaming and having a bitch fit, and Stu gave Rose a look of shock as he ran over to Casey and helped her up. This is what really sparked the rumors of Rose being a killer, but a week later everything died down and Rose began to hang out with the group again. Mostly Randy because he was really nice to her and always there for her, she knew he liked her but she never wanted a relationship with anyone because she knew that it wouldn’t end well. And after her mother’s death Sidney and Billy’s relationship went downhill and so did Casey and Stu, Casey dumped Stu for Steven and Stu lied to Tatum saying he left Casey for her and all of that. Randy and Rose stayed friends but had feelings sparking but nobody made a move, they knew the rules as they were both horror fans.

The day it started

When Rose woke up three days before the anniversary of her mothers passing, her and Sidney went to school together and Tatum ran up to them as they were both visibly confused of all the news reporter trucks and police cars outside the front of the school, “You didn’t hear?” Tatum said to the two, “No? What happened” Sidney replied. “Casey Becker and Steve Orth were found killed last night!” Tatum said “What, no way!” Rose replied in shock. “We’re not just talking killed, we’re talking splatter movie killed. Ripped open from end to end..” said Tatum, “Casey sits next to me in English!” Rose exclaimed sadly.. “not anymore.. it’s so sad her mom and dad found her outside hanging from a tree, her insides on the outside..” Tatum said “oh my god!” Sidney said “did they knew who did it?” Rose replied confused rubbing her neck as the trio walked up the stairs, “fucking clueless, I mean they’re interrogating the entire school. Teachers, janitors, students.” Tatum said “Did they think someone from school did it?” Rose replied “They don’t know.. I mean Dewey was saying this was the worse crime they’ve seen in years even worse than… well it’s bad..” Tatum replied she didn’t say Rose and Sidney’s mother’s name and Tatum walked into the school Rose and Sidney staring at her in shock.

In class a student came in and as Rose starred at Casey’s empty seat in English a student handed the teacher a note as she read it she called Roses name “Rose.” The teacher said , “it would appear to be your turn.” Rose got out of her day dream as everyone looked at her and she grabbed her stuff and walked out the classroom.

“Who’s up next.” Principal Henry said to the sheriff and deputy, “Uhh Rose Prescott” Deputy Dewey replied reading the name list, “she was one of the daughters of uh..” the principal said before Dewey cleared his throat and Rose walked in, “Rose, thank you” The principal said to the worker as he grabbed Roses side gently leading her in. “Hi Rose.” The Sheriff said “Sheriff Burke, Dewey.” Rose said looking at the two boys in front of her “Uh that’s Deputy Riley today, Rose.” Dewey replied smiling awkwardly and Rose adjusted herself in her seat, “How is everything” Sheriff said to Rose “good!” Rose swallowed and nodded slowly “And your dad? How’s he doing.” He replied “Were good thanks.” Rose said, “We’re gonna keep this very simple Rose,” principal Henry said “the police just wanna ask ya a few questions, okay Rose?” He added on rubbing Roses chin making her look up at him “mhm.” The sheriff looked at the principal up and down weird but asked “Rose, were ya close to Casey Becker?” The sheriff asked Rose and she shakes her head, “Nope, she hated me because of my mom’s..” Rose stopped speaking and felt her eyes welling up with tears, the sheriff nodded and Dewey wrote it down. “I understand Rose, you’re free to go mkay?” He replied to Rose and she nodded as she grabbed her things and walked out the office.

“All students are encouraged promptly to return to their homes from school grounds avoid strangers, walk in twos and threes and..” The principal said on the announcements, “He asked if I knew Casey.” Sidney said to everyone. “Me too!” Tatum replied “hey did they ask if you liked to hunt?” Stu said and Billy replied “yeah they did.” Tatum looked confused , “hunt? why would they ask if you liked to hunt?” She said confused “because their bodies were gutted.” Randy said lying back and smiling but they couldn’t see, “Thank you Randy.” Billy said sarcastically. “They didn’t ask me if I liked to hunt?” Tatum said “Because there’s no way a girl could’ve killed em.” Stu replied smirking , “That’s so sexist the killer could easily be female, Basic instinct.” Rose replied rolling her eyes at Stu and putting her head on Randy’s chest, “That was an ice pick, not exactly the same thing..” Randy said “Yeah, Casey and Steve were completely hollowed out. The fact is it takes a man to do something like that!” Stu replied and Tatum rolled her eyes, “Or a mans mentality!” Rose replied. “Exactly!” Tatum said giving Stu a look. “How.. do you gut someone?” Sidney said, in a whisper but so loud you could hear it. Everyone went silent and looked at her for a second before Stu spoke, “You take a knife..” and Billy suddenly looked at Stu. “And ya slit em from groin to sternum..” Stu continued on and Rose and Sidney both looked uncomfortable, “Hey, it’s called tact you fuckrag.” Billy replied and Sidney looked at Stu, “Hey Stu, didn’t you used to date Casey?” Sidney said and Stu smiled as Tatum gave Stu a dirty look, “Yeah, for like two seconds!” with a laugh Stu said this, and Randy moved closer to Tatum In a whisper anyone could hear. “Before she dumped him for Steve!” Randy said smiling and Tatum looked at Stu confused, “I thought you dumped her for me!” Tatum said confused. “I did! He’s full of shit!” Stu replied and Rose looked at Stu because she knew he was lying.

Randy grabbed Roses waist and she blushed as he spoke “And are the police aware that ya dated the victim?” Stu and Tatum looked at Randy, “What are ya saying? That I killed her?” Stu said with a bit of a smile. “It would certainly prove your highschool Q!” Randy replied “Stu was with me last night, mkay?” Tatum said moving her head closer to his in a smirk as Stu also smiled, “Yeah I was!” And he winked at Rose. She looked at the couple in a jokingly disgusted face pretending to gag and laughed right after, “was that before or after he sliced and diced?” Randy said and his voice went deeper on the last part and Sidney visibly was uncomfortable shifting in her spot. “Fuck you nutcase! where were you last night?” Tatum said “with Rose! Thank ya!” Randy replied and Rose smiled, “Yeah!” She replied and Tatum laughed “And I wonder what they were doing..” as she gave Rose and Randy a look. “Watching videos, thank you!” Randy and Rose both said as they smiled and blushed, “I didn’t kill anybody..” Stu said and Billy chimed in. “Nobody said you did.” As he gave Stu a look raising his eyebrows, which left Rose suspicious again. “Thanks buddy!” Stu replied, “Besides it takes a man to do something like that!” Randy said in a sassy voice and Rose giggled, Randy hugged her waist tighter. “Yo I’ll gut your ass in a second, kid!” Stu replied laughing. “Tell me something, did you really put her liver in the mailbox? Because I heard her liver was in the mailbox next to her spleen and pancreas!” Randy said in a girl voice and that’s what made Rose and Sidney’s stomach turn in a bad way, Sidney got up and packed everything up. “Randy! You goonfuck I’m trying to eat here!” Tatum said angrily, “She’s getting mad here right? Better live her alone” Stu said laughing and Sidney kissed Billy’s cheek walking off and he was visibly looking at Sidney with hatred and Rose saw it all. She knew something. “Liver alone!” Stu said again laughing harder sticking his tongue out at Billy and Billy hit him in the side making him stop laughing and say “Ow! Liver! Liver! Liver! It was a joke..” Stu said laughing and looking at Tatum and Rose, Randy got up and Rose gave him a kiss on the cheek before he left. Tatum smirked at the two and Stu and Billy looked at Randy with hatred, nobody noticed it. “Bye Rands Bands.” Rose said waving and smiling stupidly, “Cutest couple alert!” Tatum said laughing and Rose blushed hitting her side. Billy and Stu gave each other a look and they both knew there plan for later.

[cozy-fantasy-corner]

Band of Idiots Pt. 4: Coney Island

Pairing: Stucky x Reader

Warnings: Fluff, angst, pining, language, Steve being an angsty cat, mentions of violence, alcohol, illness, death, and fondue-ing 

Word Count: 2.8k

Summary: Steve, Y/n, and Bucky are as thick as thieves. They spend a day at Coney Island together. Feelings are discovered and lies are told.

Author’s Note: It’s been ages since I’ve updated this fic. My apologies. Life got crazy. I graduated high school, moved out of state for college, and then got super sick. But I’m back and better than ever. My inbox and dms are always open!

(not my gif. credit to the owner)

-------

Brooklyn summers could be unbearable. The molten heat pounding on the asphalt of a concrete jungle was enough to make any seasoned New Yorker feel faint. The air looked like a blur and felt like it was baking the city alive. The sun a constant, unrelenting oven. 

July of 1934 was no different. In fact, it was somehow worse. 

Just two weeks ago, Stevie had his fourteenth birthday. And boy was he rearing to go. The torturous temperatures had Stevie acting like an alley cat. He was always yowling about something and picking fights with any and everyone. 

Three days this week he’d come home while Miss Sarah was at work cut up and bleeding. I’d be an amazing nurse with the amount of times I’ve given that boy stitches and set his nose. 

With Bucky’s new job down at the docks, he couldn’t save Steve so easily from all of his fights like he used to. Poor Buck is so worried about our boy. The thought of him biting off more than he can chew is enough to cause a knot in all of our stomachs. We wouldn’t know what to do without him. 

------- 

Today, Bucky had the day off of work and he’d been saving for weeks to take us to Coney Island to blow off some steam. For him, that was spending all his money to impress dames. For Stevie, it was drawing while next to me on a bench or the beach. As for me, I loved to just sit and observe all of the people: the sights, the smells, the sounds. 

The train ride to the amusement park was crowded and boiling with body heat. It smelled like stale sweat and old people in the worst way. The screams of children and the loud chatter from other patrons were enough to give me a headache, even with my bad ear. My back was killing me from standing for so long without a break, forcing me to brace myself on Steve and Bucky’s shoulders. Of course, Mister Meat-Head over here was flexin’ his suddenly very toned shoulder under my grip which caused me to blush. Thank God my face was already red from overheating, or he’d have poked fun at me about it. 

My shitty lungs were being squeezed by the warm, wet air, and I wheezed slightly. My wheezing was met with Steve’s and a concerned glare from Bucky. I moved my hand to my bag, fumbling for my peppermint oil. My fingers met the cold glass and pried it open near our noses. A deep inhale eased the pressure in my chest. 

“You alright, Kiddo?”

“She’s peachy, Buck. We’re on a hot train with a buncha loud, smelly assholes and we both got shit lungs. Wattaya think, ya jerk?” Steve snarked back, radiating thick annoyance. My mouth fell open in shock. 

Bucky threw up his hand defensively, a mildly hurt look on his face. Steve was never this cross, even on his worst days. Something was wrong, had been for weeks. Getting into fights, coming home later, skipping meals, being snippy, even to me. Now it was getting worse. I hoped that it wouldn’t ruin our day out, but part of me knew that things would only go downhill from there. And all I could do was brace myself for impact. 

I pulled my shoulders closer to my neck and inched towards Buck a little bit. My eyes squeezed themselves shut and I tried to breathe in, hoping for calm. All I got was B.O. and a frown from Steve. He knows I only do that when I’m nervous, and he was the thing making me nervous. 

Buck seemed so set on enjoying the day that he glazed over everything and plastered his trademark Bucky Barnes grin on his sweaty face. I almost wanted to pinch his arm just to snap him out of it. No one should smile that much or look that good doing it. Especially not on a train in the summer heat. Honest to God, it was annoying. 

Between Mister Sunshine and Mister Scrooge, the day was bound to be interesting to say the least. 

------

Bucky had stopped to grab me some pop while Steve stormed off, a bit too eager to be rid of us for my taste. A minute piece of my heart crumbled away. Never, in all the years that I had known Steven Grant Rogers, had he voluntarily put distance between us. I couldn’t figure a rhyme or reason, all I could feel in that moment was hurt. 

I ambled along the dock, book in hand. The salt-tinged air lapped at my frizzy locks and splotchy skin like a cooling balm. It felt like I could fully exhale finally. Deep breaths were a blessing. 

Very little time passed when Buck had bounced up beside me with his angelic grin. His baby fat had melted away in recent months, giving him a devilish yet heavenly appearance. That stupid, perfect grin caught me off guard. I was in awe that my safety net, my friend could possibly be this beautiful. He had always been handsome, but not once in my life had I seen someone, anyone, look so perfect. I wasn’t aware that my feelings for him could grow, but by-golly they did. 

Just staring at him wouldn’t do, so I elbowed him in the ribs. His playful pout made my chest squeeze. It wasn’t in the usual painful way like my attacks. It was something new, unfamiliar. He chuckled and pulled me under his arm as we continued down the dock. I felt so small and safe at his side. Tiny jolts of electricity seemed to pass from his skin to mine with every step. 

Nestled into Bucky’s side, we meandered towards the rides. A good handful of summers had passed since we’d been able to come here, but we had long outgrown the attractions we were used to. We bickered back and forth about which adventure to choose. I was thankfully able to convince him to take me on the ferris wheel at some point today, but I knew I’d have to let him have his fun first. The way his eyes lit up talking about the Cyclone told me that I wouldn’t have any choice but to go with him. God, I hate roller coasters. 

That Godforsaken ride was the bane of my existence, but my boys loved it to death. I always ended up with my head tucked into someone’s chest as we whipped ‘round and ‘round. On especially good days, like today, I was able to hold my lunch down.  

Something about this time felt odd. Bucky kept looking at me with a goofy grin. This smile wasn’t his normal endearing, toothy grin; there was something more to it that I couldn’t quite place. That look had my heart pounding in my chest, not from fear, but excitement maybe. 

------

Many more strange glances were exchanged over the next couple of hours, Steve’s attitude problem mostly forgotten. I couldn’t help but worry that something was wrong with Buck. Over the last 7 years, he had looked at me a lot of ways: worried, annoyed, caring. Today was a whole fresh set that I couldn’t quite name. It made me uneasy, yet giddy at the same time. A tiny, delusional part of me thought that maybe, just maybe the older boy loved me like I loved him. That would be impossible. He loves me like a sister. 

The rumble of Bucky’s voice shook me from my thoughts.

“How ‘bout that ferris wheel now? I think I’ve tortured you enough for one day.” he said with a chuckle. I nodded eagerly. 

As I went to start walking towards my favorite ride, I felt a hand in mine. Bucky’s. My breath caught in my throat, but I wouldn’t allow myself to freeze up. He couldn’t know how that tiny gesture affected me. Instead, I smiled up at him, squeezing his massive hand as we moved. 

Such a simple motion brought all of the thoughts I had shoved to the side crashing forward. My mind was in such a state that I didn’t even realize that we were at the front of the line, about to enter our car. Bucky moved to help me up with his kind smile and I sheepishly accepted. 

Damn him. Damn his beautiful smile. Damn his gentlemanly ways. 

After we settled beside one another, he took my hand in his again. His calloused thumb smoothed over the back of my velvet soft hand. It was almost like he was trying to tell me something. Lord, I need calm down. 

As we reached the top, Buck peeled me away from his side and turned look at me. He had an energy about him like he wanted to say something. His brow was furrowed, his eyes serious. His hands rubbed themselves down his thighs nervously. I couldn’t help but feel a little scared. Bucky is the calm one, the happy one. There has never been something he couldn’t turn into a joke. His brow only set itself this way when he was uncomfortable. 

He opened his mouth to speak, but no sound came out. 

I gulped. 

This had to be bad, right? But it couldn’t be. Nothing bad could ever come from such beautiful lips. Nothing. 

A sudden warmth on my lips jerked me out of my worry. My eyes blew wide in surprise. The warmth was Bucky, more specifically, Bucky’s lips. Everything faded away, even the shock, as I melted into the soft feeling of him against my mouth. His work-hardened hands came up to cup my cheeks while I sat there limp in his arms. We had all kissed on another over the years, light pecks on the cheeks and forehead. This one was different. 

Bucky pulled back for air and I sighed softly. Our foreheads met, eyes closed. My body was still limp, but my head spun a million miles a minute. He feels the same way. I’m not crazy. What does this mean? What about Steve?

Steve! 

We jumped apart when a sharp, familiar cough pierced through the haze. My startled eyes met Steve’s angry ones. Dread filled my stomach as I clamored away from Buck and onto the platform of the ferris wheel. Fuck. Fuck. Fuck. 

------

Steve grabbed my arm roughly and dragged me towards a building nearby. Buck ran after us, yelling for us to stop. I was filled with panic and guilt. Steve looked like he was going to kill someone, well Bucky specifically. 

“What the FUCK was that, Y/N?” Steve growled, fist closing more tightly around my bicep. 

Before I could respond, Bucky was towering over both of us looking just as confused as I was. He paused for a second, taking in my shaking figure. His eyes hardened with rage. No one was allowed to scare me, not even Steve. He grabbed his shoulder harshly and spun him around. 

“You wanna let her go, Punk?” Buck hissed. Steve bristled and clenched his jaw. 

In true Steve fashion, he decided to forgo using his words, leaping straight to using his fists. His fist connected with Bucky’s jaw and I screamed. Bucky shot me a worried glance before pinning Steve to the wall as gently as possible. They stared one another down. All of our chests were heaving. 

Steve looked up at our friend with tears brimming his baby blue eyes, “How could you, pal? You know better”.

Bucky’s face softened instantly and my panic grew. Steve has feelings for me?

Buck muttered an apology and let Stevie go. I pushed myself between them, tears rolling down my flushed cheeks. Their gazes on me were piercing, my skin heating under their eyes. I grabbed Bucky’s hand and turned to Steve. He grabbed my free hand and squeezed softly, eyes full of tears and remorse. I put my head on his chest and hugged him tightly. 

“Stevie, what’s goin’ on, huh?” I whispered pulling back slightly. 

He just croaked, his words seeming to escape him. Buck squeeze my hand, whispering his goodbyes. As the sun dipped low, casting long shadows across the alley, a heavy silence enveloped us. Steve's gaze was distant, lost in the swirl of emotions that had consumed him. I stood there, my heart heavy with the weight of unspoken truths and tangled feelings.

"I... I don't know where to begin," Steve finally murmured, his voice barely above a whisper. His eyes searched mine, a mixture of pain and longing flickering within them. 

I reached out, gently touching his cheek, feeling the warmth of his skin beneath my fingertips. "It's okay, Steve. Whatever it is, we can figure it out together," I said softly, offering him a small, reassuring smile. Of course we could, I love him more than life itself. 

He nodded, his Adam's apple bobbing as he swallowed hard. "I... I've been trying to deny it, but... seeing you with Bucky, it just..." His voice trailed off, his expression haunted.

I took a step closer, closing the gap between us. "Steve, whatever you're feeling, it's okay. You don't have to hold it all in," I whispered, my heart aching for him. I didn’t mean to hurt him. We had promised as kids never to harm the other. That promise lay shattered at our feet, and it was all my stupid fucking fault. 

Tears welled up in his eyes, reflecting the fading light of the setting sun. "I'm sorry, Y/N. I'm so sorry," he choked out, his voice thick with emotion.

I wrapped my arms around him, holding him close as he buried his face in the crook of my neck. We stood there, clinging to each other in the dwindling light, the weight of our unspoken words hanging heavy in the air. I shushed him softly like Ms. Sarah would, hoping, praying that I could ease his pain with imitation of his mother’s love. 

In that moment, amidst the chaos of tangled feelings and fractured relationships, the crushing realization that I had potentially destroyed the most meaningful bond in my life washed over me. One kiss and our worlds had crashed apart. 

Steve and I remained locked in our embrace, the warmth of each other's frail presence a balm to our troubled souls. The world seemed to fade away around us, leaving only the echo of our steady heartbeats and the whisper of our shared breaths. Clinging to him seemed to be the only thing keeping the ground from vanishing beneath us. He would never let me fall. 

With a gentle touch, I tilted Steve's chin up, meeting his gaze with a tenderness born of years of friendship and unspoken understanding. "I need you to say it." I whisper, my voice cracking under the weight of years of shared memories and unspoken emotions.

Steve's eyes searched mine, his gaze filled with a vulnerability that tore at my heart. "I love Bucky. More than you will ever know, Minnie." he admitted, his voice raw with emotion. Something inside of me fractured. 

He loved him? I felt betrayed. Steve had known for years how I felt, and he had kept this to himself. To what, protect me? Tinges of frustration bubbled up inside of me. He had lied to me, let me confide in him in the earliest hours of the morning, given me advice. None of it was in earnest. 

My anger fizzled out when I saw the tears falling from his pleading eyes. There wasn’t a way in the world I could stay mad at my Stevie, however betrayed I felt. 

I brushed away a stray tear that clung to his cheek, my thumb tracing a gentle path across his skin. "We'll figure it out together, Steve. Whatever comes our way, we'll face it together. All three of us," I promised, the conviction in my words unwavering. He flinched at my mention of all of us. His eyes begged me to keep his feeling for Buck between him and myself. I nodded knowingly, unwilling to betray him. 

In that moment, amidst the fading light of a Brooklyn sunset, I knew that this God-forsaken mess was far from over. But as long as we had each other, I was certain that we could weather any storm that lay ahead. And with that knowledge warming my heart, I held Steve a little tighter, silently vowing to never let go. 

[malibuhabits]

helloooo! another snippet from my 90’s fame au. find me on ao3 @ chevymalibu and read the tags and notes carefully!

DEAD ASLEEP (Dreaming Away Your Life)

Once dressed in his new underwear and jeans, Eddie walks barefoot towards the light gray backdrop that has people bustling around it, testing lights and cameras and other tools like their lives depend on it. He sees Vickie having a conversation with a tall and freckled girl, and since the tiny but terrifying redhead is mad at him for once again being a horrible client, he chooses to let them talk and keeps to himself. Just standing there in his boring clothes, wishing he was drinking in his hotel room instead.

He doesn't get to be alone for long, as he never gets these days, Phil already joining him with-

Okay, wow.

Steve Harrington.

Listen. Of course Eddie is familiar with him. The whole globe has been obsessed with the face that’s launched countless luxury brands and magazine covers.

Still, seeing him in real life… nothing could’ve prepared Eddie to the vision.

Thin, bony, and angular, a bit hunchbacked, beauty marks all over untainted skin. Sharp jawline, pretty pink dusting cheeks, unintentionally pouty lips. And that chestnut hair’s just as fluffy and impressive as it’s famous for.

But it’s the eyes that seal the deal. Droopy, drunken and dreamy, basically pools of liquid hazel, holding the spectators charmed and spellbound.

Maybe this photoshoot won’t be such a drag after all…

“Eddie,” Phil tells him, “This is Steve. You’ll be working together in this campaign,” as if it wasn’t previously agreed upon.

They shake hands.

Steve’s is soft and undamaged like it hasn’t done manual labor once. Eddie’s hands are calloused, firm and strong. Steve wears one signet ring on his pinky, Eddie has four chunky ones. The contrast shouldn’t be as deliciously intriguing as Eddie makes it out to be.

“Hello, nice to officially meet you,” Steve says with a hint of accent. It’s light, but it’s there. And it’s unreasonably sexy.

Eddie’s is half chubbed already.

Understandably, he can’t really be blamed for putting on his most wicked grin, showing off his famous dimples and sharpening his heated eyes. See, it’s his thing, being unapologetically raunchy. It’s his brand. People love it.

Usually…

“Pleasure’s all mine baby boy, believe me,” he practically purrs, can’t help it.

Steve gives him a look, head to toe. It’s not a polite one. It’s calculated and frosty. Stand-offish.

Says something in French to Phil who quickly claps his hands like a dorky dad breaking up an argument. “Well boys, I have a few things to put in order, so warm up a little and get more comfortable. Ten minutes tops, and we’ll start with the video and move on to the photos. Sounds good?”

Eddie notices how he casually squeezes Steve’s narrow waist before leaving. He wishes he could do that too. Wishes he could touch Steve and make sure he’s real.

He’ll get the chance to. It already feels inevitable.

He rakes his eyes down Steve’s body, only now noticing that instead of blue jeans he’s wearing a satin dressing gown that’s loosely tied. Really loosely. It’s teasing, it’s a statement, and Eddie is sure there isn’t a single person in this studio who wouldn’t kill to untie the barely-there knot themselves. Nor are there many whom Steve would forbid from doing so.

When Eddie’s gaze lands back to his face, he’s pleasantly surprised to see Steve’s eyes already on him. He’s reading Eddie’s face, gorgeous eyes darting swiftly before settling and narrowing accusingly.

“Aren’t you going to apologize?”

Eddie’s eyebrows jump high in surprise and if he was intrigued before it’s nothing compared to this. He knows a spoiled brat when he sees one.

“Apologize for what, princess?”

“For being late. It’s rude you know, or did the circus you grew up in fail to teach you any manners?”

So. Not only a brat but a full-on bitch too.

And the worst thing? It’s kinda Eddie’s weakness.

Naturally he has to mock a little.

“Aren’t ya clever,” he drawls sarcastically, “were you born this witty or did daddy pay for private lessons?”

Haughty roll of eyes and an impatient sigh. “Still waiting that apology.”

continue:

[fineinkline]

Swing

Chapter Three: Robin and a Million Wrong Guesses 

Notes:folks, i'm not going to lie, this isn't my best work. Unfortunately for myself I started another fic while writing this one and for some reason my only ideas are for that fic now. I promise, it'll get better...or maybe I'll just give up! we shall see. thank you for all the likes and reblogs, it means a lot!“So, then Dallas is your favorite character?” Robin asks, sitting at a barstool by the kitchen island. Steve and Robin have been filling the time between the arrival of food and Eddie by debating who the best Outsiders character is. “No, dude, Dallas is kinda mean sometimes! I just think he’s hot.” Steve retorts. “Well, if we’re just going by looks then Cherry is my favorite.” Robin smirks over at Steve before saying, “I always took you for a Sodapop kinda guy anyway.” Steve tilts his head, thinking about it a little. “Yeah, I guess. He tries to help out his brothers as best as he can and in the end he gets his heart broken by the girl he is in love with. Sounds about right!” Steve gives a weak chuckle. “No, I meant the fact that you are both willing to do anything for the people you love,” she starts, “But you’re also such pretty boys.” she adds before the moment can get too mushy for either of them. 

As Steve predicted, Eddie and the pizza showed up at the same time. “Ya know, I’ve never actually seen The Outsiders.” Eddie shares, pulling a few slices onto his plate before coating them with the little packet of red pepper flakes. “Seriously,” Robin questions, “I mean you at least read it, right?” There is a moment of silence as they all find a place to sit in the living room. Steve and Robin on the couch and Eddie sprawled out in the big chair Robin was in earlier. “Why would I?” Eddie shrugs as he starts to chow down on his first slice. Robin and Steve exchange a glance and chuckle a little before Robin says “Because it was required reading junior year…” “Was it? Man, seems like ages ago. I don’t know, man. Maybe I did read it, but all the books they made us read were shit. I like to get lost in a book and I couldn’t really relate to Pip from Great Expectations.” Everyone laughed a little trying to picture Eddie really diving into the woes of a young man trying to climb the social and financial ladder all while trying to woo a girl. 

“Okay, maybe I seriously misjudged the book.” They are about thirty minutes into the movie and Johnny and Ponyboy are running away after killing the Soc to try and find Dallas. Steve laughs a little, “Yeah, you think! It’s actually a really interesting story, right?!” Robin is lying across the sofa with her feet in Steve’s lap and Eddie has turned in the chair to get a better view of the TV, so his back is against an arm rest and his legs are thrown over the other armrest. “So who is your favorite character so far?” Robin asks. Earlier Steve and Robin decided that a person's type could be determined by who their favorite Outsiders character is. For example, Robin’s favorite character is Cherry and Robin has a thing for cute redheads. Steve’s favorite is Dallas because he is a “bad boy” with a heart of gold. “Sodapop!” Eddie answers without hesitation and Robin’s eyes get big as they drift over to lock with Steve’s. She purses her lips and tilts her head toward Steve as if to say “very interesting”. 

After the movie was over, the trio let the credits roll as Robin and Steve let Eddie talk through and dissect the whole story (like he should’ve done junior year). When he’s done going over metaphors and character archetypes, Robin asks again, “So is Soda still your favorite character?” “Of course,” Eddie half-shouts, throwing his hands up, “why wouldn’t he be?” Robin snickers a little and slips a sideways glance before explaining her “Outsiders type” theory to Eddie. “Okay?” he says puzzled, “So I have a thing for pretty guys who are nice. Is that really a surprise?” He shrugs as he settles back into the chair. Steve can feel his face getting warmer and he can’t tell if it’s because Eddie just confirmed for 100% fact that he is Eddie’s type or if it’s because he can feel Robin staring at him trying to get him to look over and have another eye contact conversation. “So, I guess I can rule out Gareth,” Robin states sitting up on the sofa while Steve still refuses to make eye contact with her. Eddie’s brows knit together in confusion and he starts to look around a little thinking he missed something and somehow ended up in a different conversation, “Rule out Gareth for what? What did I miss?” “As the mystery man you keep ditching us for,” Robin wiggles her fingers when she says mystery. Eddie just laughs, “Oh, yeah that. Yeah I wouldn’t go for Gareth, but that’s not to say he hasn’t tried.” Steve can tell by the way Eddie is shifting in his chair that he is trying to move the conversation away from this topic. He isn’t the best at keeping secrets anyway and especially not now that Robin is pressing him for information. “Oh really?” Robin’s bangs shoot up behind her eyebrows, “what has he tried?” She asks, leaning forward to place her elbows on her knees while she listens. Steve perches forward a little as well, he never knew Gareth tried anything and, let's be honest, Steve is known to get a little jealous sometimes. 

“Nothing really,” Eddie tries to brush it away, waving his hand in the air like it can actually push the conversation away,  “when he first joined Hellfire he would stay behind and help me with character sheets and one shots and stuff. The whole time I thought he was just super into D&D, but it turns out that he thought of them as dates.” Eddie was fiddling with his rings now and Steve huffed a little as he crossed his arms across his chest. “Pretty presumptuous, if you ask me.” It comes out as more of a mumble, but both Robin and Eddie hear and give him a look that says “what the fuck are you doing”. Steve rolls his eyes as he gets up to take their trash from dinner into the kitchen. “If it’s not someone we already know, then why are you being so secretive about it?” Even in the kitchen, Steve can hear Robin trying to whisper. There is a long pause and for a moment Steve thinks that maybe Eddie answered so quietly that he just couldn’t hear him. “Unless,” Robin starts, “it IS someone we know and that’s why you won’t tell us!” “Woah, wait a-” Eddie tries to defend himself, but Robin has already started shouting theories of who it could be and why Eddie would be hiding it. Steve makes his way back into the living room to find Robin standing on the couch slightly pacing as she rambles about who it could possibly be. Eddie is standing, staring up at her with a look of hopelessness on his face. Eddie and Steve look at each other, “should we just tell her?” Steve’s eyes ask. “She was bound to find out sometime,” Eddie’s eyes responded with a resigned shrug of his shoulders. “Robin-” Steve shouts, hands on his hips, she continues to ramble on about how it can’t be Argyle because there was no reason to hide that from anyone. “It would have to be someone super embarrassing, or maybe,” she pauses her pacing on the couch, “maybe he isn’t even out yet and that’s why you wont tell us!” “Robin!” Steve continues, if she would just stop for a second they’ll just tell her. “Oh Eddie, NO!” She suddenly stops her pacing and hops to the floor grabbing onto Eddie’s shoulders and giving him a little shake, “It’s Tommy Hagan isn’t it?!” 

“WHAT?!” Both Eddie and Steve shout in shock before the whole room falls silent and still. Robin still has her hands on Eddie’s shoulders and her eyes seem to be pleading with him to tell her it isn’t true. Steve still has his hands on his hips, but his jaw had dropped nearly to the floor at the assumption that Eddie would go for someone like Tommy. Hadn’t Eddie just said he liked pretty boys who were nice? Tommy H was certainly not that! Why the hell would Eddie date Tommy? “Well I was just going to tell you who it was, but now I’ve got to hear this theory!” Eddie starts laughing so hard that he bends slightly at the waist and grabs his sides. Steve is still standing there, fuming over a relationship that wouldn’t happen in any world, and Robin is now looking at Eddie like he’s lost it. 

After being able to look at Robin without breaking out into a fit of laughter, Eddie collapses on the couch and pulls Robin down with him leaving Steve standing still unsure of what exactly was going on. “Go on, tell me how you came to the conclusion that my secret lover is Tommy fucking Hagan.” Eddie can’t even get the sentence out without laughing. “Secret. Lover?” Steve ground out, giving Eddie an incredulous look. It was bad enough that Robin guessed Tommy, Eddie didn’t need to suggest anything further. Robin ignores Steve and barrels into explaining her thought process. “Well, it would have to be someone who we all know AND someone who would be embarrassing in some way or another. I would be pretty embarrassed to be dating the douchebag who slams people’s heads into lockers for laughs. But, no judgment here, my dear sweet Eddie, it’s hard enough for us gays here in Bumfuck, Indiana. If you really like him, then I’ll be happy to keep your secret.” Eddie is sent into another fit of giggles, meanwhile Steve lets the frustration sink in. He can’t believe Robin truly thinks Eddie would date some dipshit like Tommy! “You must be joking!” Steve starts, causing Robin to turn fully to face him and Eddie’s laughter to die down. “You really think that Eddie would willingly go out with the guy who threatened to dunk his head in a toilet or light his hair on fire?” There is a long pause as Steve looks at Robin in disbelief. “Well…that’s part of the reason he doesn’t want to tell anyone.” She states again. “Oh Jesus, Robin!” Steve throws his hands in the air before they come down with a sharp smack against his thighs. “Look, Robs, it was hilarious at first,” Eddie says, drawing her attention away from Steve's mini mental break, “But, I do have higher standards than that.”

“Then who?! Who could it possibly be?!” “ME, Robin! Did you ever think that, maybe, it could possibly be me?” Steve asks rhetorically with eyes wide. Both Eddie and Robin are now staring at him like he was in the middle of growing a third head. There is a long silence. A couple minutes stretches into 10 minutes of silence. Robin looking between the two boys, Eddie looking at Steve with adoration and looking back at Robin to gauge her reaction, but through the whole time, Steve kept his eyes on Robin. It must’ve been twenty minutes before someone made a sound and when they did, it was Robin laughing.

[growup-thatbeautiful]

Series Masterlist

warnings: violence, light cursing, kissing, tension, weapons, anxiety,

a/n: hi guys! it’s been a while :))

taglist: @ya-khochu-umeret

No One Can Hurt You Now

Billy stays awake for the rest of the night, a chill settling over the quiet air. He’s surprised that he doesn’t feel more alone, but Steve’s making it difficult, pressured up to Billy’s side arm sprawled on top of Billy’s chest. As far as he can tell, Steve isn’t having any nightmares, which keeps Billy somewhat sane in the quiet. He doesn’t know what he would do if Steve started having a nightmare. He’s usually the one to be woken up by them, aside from the few times that Max had them, but even then it wasn’t like this. Nothing has been like this before. It terrifies Billy to no end, to care so much about Steve in such a little amount of time.

It’s new and raw and fucking insane. It makes him want to crawl out of his skin and huddle closer to Steve at the same time.

It’s fucking annoying, is what it is. He can’t seem to push Steve away, though. Not even his heart is cold enough for that.

The night passes uneventfully. Billy is able to get through silence and darkness easily with Steve beside him, which he doesn’t have time to digest. Sure, he’s itching to get up and leave the cramped dampness of their cave, but it's manageable. His hands run idle patterns against Steve’s skin, restless energy concentrated in his fingertips and the lightning they leave when they touch Steve.

The morning comes with the calm sound of calling birds and rustling leaves. Billy doesn’t want to, but he has to wake Steve up at some point. For now, they’re safe here, but he doesn’t know how long that’ll last without the cover of darkness. Of course, Steve didn’t notice when Billy was in the cave, but Billy has the feeling that Steve isn’t the most observant person out there when it comes to his surroundings. At least not when he isn’t under direct threat. Then, he snaps into action immediately, almost a completely different person. Billy’s only seen the receiving end of it, but he wouldn’t mind working with Steve instead.

“Harrington,” he drawls, “it’s time to wake up from your beauty rest.” The only response he gets is a muffled “no” and Steve buries himself further into Billy’s shoulder. It’s fucking adorable. He almost feels bad for waking him up. Almost. “Come on, rise and shine. Don’t make me fucking pour water on you, I’ve done it before.” It’s Max’s least favorite way of being woken up and almost worth the death glares he gets afterward.

Steve groans and sits up with a glare to rival Max’s and pokes Billy in the chest. “You’re a fucking asshole.”

A delighted laugh leaves Billy’s chest, pushing its way past his common sense before he can stop it. “And you have messy hair, Harrington.”

“Yeah? Am I that bad?” Steve runs a hand through his hair and messes it up, even more, strands sticking out in every direction.

“Don’t worry too much about it, pretty boy. I’m not sure you’re going to need perfect hair to get through the day.”

“You never know,” Steve says, sitting up fully and stretching. “My good looks can get me out of a lot of trouble.”

“I’m sure they can,” Billy agrees, moving towards the entrance, his backpack secure on his back as he shuffles out of the cave. “Are you coming?”

Steve nods and follows behind as they make their way to the river, traveling upstream, away from the place where they started.

Billy doesn’t turn around to check, but he can hear Steve’s footsteps and light cursing behind him. Instinctively, Billy draws his knife out of his backpack and holds it loosely between his fingers, twirling it slowly. He hopes Steve does the same with his stick.

“You can stop being so tense, I’m not going to kill you in your sleep.” Steve steps into pace beside Billy, reaching out to touch Billy’s shoulder, but thinking better of it when Billy sends him a glare. Billy’s already off-balance enough, he doesn’t think he could handle any more of Steve.

“I’m not asleep, so obviously that’s not what I’m worried about, dipshit.” Billy marches forward, intently looking everywhere except Steve.

“Fucking hell,” Steve groans, his hands on his hips. “Fine, I promise I won’t kill you for twenty-four hours. We’ll renegotiate after the fact. Happy?”

“Delighted,” says Billy, voice scathing. “Can’t fucking wait. You’re word better be good, Harrington.”

“It is.” They fall into a comfortable silence, Steve settling into a pace behind Billy, trailing like a lost puppy, cursing at tree roots and weeds that keep tripping him. It’s endearing as shit, and Billy has to fight in order to not laugh out loud at Steve.

It was hard to pretend that he was anywhere else with Heather. They didn’t talk about it for the brief time they had together, but there was always the fact that they were being hunted looming over them. Steve, though, blows away the paranoia to a degree. He makes it easier to breathe, at least until he looks Billy in the eye. Although it seems unfair, that he’s doing better with Steve than Heather, he always did have a soft spot for pretty boys. If he didn’t have such gaping wounds, he might try to dig deeper, but it’s so much easier to let silence take over.

They walk for a while but eventually come to a grassy hill. At the top of the hill, there’s a tall, ivy-covered, stone wall that reaches unexplainably high.

“Well, this is interesting,” Billy drawls, staring up at the wall, shielding his eyes from the sun. “Think we should turn around, Harrington?”

“I don’t see another option,” Steve says, running his hands along the smooth rock. “Do you want to try and climb this thing?” It’s meant rhetorically, but Billy takes the bait.

“Why, are you scared?” The wall is cool and the vines are crystallized with remaining morning dew when Billy leans his shoulder against them. “I won’t let you get hurt, I promise.”

“I’m not fucking climbing a wall. It’s obviously there for a reason.” Despite his words, Steve looks at the footholds of the wall in order to assess where he would be able to climb.

“Come on, King Steve, live on the edge a little,” Billy taunts, testing his weight against the cracking stone. It holds without too much protest, and Billy keeps his upward pace.

“I already am by being here,” grumbles Steve, but he follows underneath Billy, climbing to the top. “Are you not worried people are going to see us? We’re going to be at the very highest vantage point.”

Billy turns to face Steve and grins. “Might as well go down with a view, right?” He doesn’t hear Steve’s reply, but he doesn’t need to. The sound of Steve’s heavy breathing behind him keeps Billy company as he hoists himself over the top of the wall. “See? This isn’t too bad.” Billy motions to the view splayed out in front of them.

The wall they’re on goes on in a circle around the whole arena, tripping over hills and cutting through forests and rivers. In the middle of the wall stands the cornucopia where they started, surrounded by a grassy opening. There’s a large fire surrounded by moving figures, who Billy assumes are some of the careers. Surrounding the cornucopia, forests and rivers landscape the area, bright greens and blues bleeding together in the sunlight. Billy can’t see any other people, but he knows they’re out there. Eleven other people beside them, some scared, some excited, some waiting to kill.

Billy is interrupted from his staring by the sound of his stomach loudly announcing his hunger. Steve looks over, amused. “We need to eat,” Steve says helpfully. “Any ideas?”

“Food is probably a good place to start,” Billy supplies, kicking his legs widely and sending pebbles skirting down the wall. Steve elbows him in the ribs and Billy laughs, leaning backward. “Fine, fine. I learned about the things you can eat when you’re out here when I was training. You got any suggestions, Harrington?”

“I can hunt,” Steve offers. “Well, more or less. Small rabbits and rats. I’m not an expert, but I think I can get us something.”

“Sounds like a plan,” Billy agrees. “We can get down from here later and”- The sound of a canon firing interrupts Billy’s thoughts and Steve jumps beside him.

“Another one,” Billy whispers, looking out at the arena. Somewhere, another kid’s heart has just stopped beating. Silently, Steve leans into Billy, drawing closer. The length of their thighs are pushed together, their arms touching too. Steve’s presence is comforting and stabilizing, despite the circumstances.

They sit until the ringing in Billy’s ears calms down and he can pretend that everything is okay. Steve is solid beside him, deep breaths in and out filling the silence.

“So, food?” Billy asks eventually, breaking the quiet. On cue, his stomach complains loudly and Steve lets out a quiet laugh.

“Yeah, I think that might be a good idea,” Steve agrees. “Do you have a plan to get us down from here?”

“Why, you don’t trust me?” Billy says, his tongue flicking down to his lower lip.

“Not when you ask like that,” laughs Steve, a hint of complaint in his voice. A red flush creeps up Steve’s neck as Billy continues staring.

Billy has mercy and scales down the wall, jumping the last few feet and landing heavily on the ground with a satisfying thunk. “Come on, Harrington,” he calls up, shielding his eyes from the sun, “I’ll catch you if you fall.”

“And then we’ll both be broken and bruised,” Steve argues, but he’s smiling and following Billy, landing on his feet and immediately falling on his ass.

Billy’s hand hangs in between them before Stebe takes it, hauling himself up. Billy steadies him with a hand low on his back, feeling the ripple of Steve’s muscles through the thin material of his shirt and jacket. “Not ideal,” Billy acknowledges, “but maybe unavoidable. And highly aesthetic.”

Steve hums in agreement and rifles through his bag, where he pulls out a knife and tests its weight against his palm. “This will probably work best for you to cut through stems and leaves of plants.” Neither one of them mentions that Billy already has a weapon, the clunkier, heavier hunting knife that’s tucked into his jacket. Steve doesn’t ask for them to trade, but Billy gives him anyway. Surprise is barely hidden on Steve’s face.

“It’ll make it easier for you to get us food,” Billy offers as explanation. “Don’t get yourself killed, yeah? I know everyone’s probably screaming at us from their homes not to split up, so let’s prove them wrong.”

“Thirty minutes, meet back here. If you’re late and hear a cannon, I’ll assume the worst and you do the same for me,” Steve says, short and brutal. Billy appreciates it for its value.

“Right,” he agrees. “Don’t go too far. Stay within yelling distance. Don’t give anyone a reason to cry over you.” Steve’s hair flops in front of his eyes as he nods.

“Billy?” Steve asks, taking an aborted step forward towards him and grabbing Billy’s hand.

Billy’s response is breathless. “Yeah?”

“Be safe,” Steve says, his eyes earnest and wide. He looks so utterly sincere, Billy can’t help but tease.

“Why, are you worried something’s going to happen to me? So you can tend to my wounds and play mother hen?” Billy taunts, running his tongue over his bottom lip.

“Has anyone ever told you how fucking annoying you are?” Steve groans, unfazed by Billy’s sharp words.

Billy grins widely, tongue running between his lips. “All the time. Why pretty boy, you wanna tell me I’m annoying too?” Billy relishes the way the tips of Steve’s ears turn bright red.

“If I thought you didn’t already know, I would,” is what Steve ends up replying, and Billy doesn’t have a good response to that.

So he walks away, branches snapping underneath the gait of his boots.

*

They reconvene a while later, when the sun is shining high above the sky and Billy’s jacket ends up tied around his waist. Billy has a good amount of food gathered in the pockets of his backpack, and Steve looks to be pretty successful at hunting.

“Wow, pretty boy. I don’t know what I expected, but you exceeded whatever expectations I did have.”

“Wow,” Steve says dryly, “Thanks, Billy. That means a lot.” Steve sets his backpack down by one of the trees and sits back against it.

“Anytime.” Billy follows Steve’s example and sits across from him, working on getting a fire started. Usually, smoke is a dead giveaway of where people are in the arena, but Billy had taken a look at the rest of the arena from the top of one of the trees, and there had been multiple other fires.

“So, I thought you were going to try and do this with that girl from your district. Heather, right?” Steve asks, leaning against the bark of a tree. They’re in the middle of a grove, with a rock wall covering them from the opposite view. In between, them is the handful of berries and fruits that Billy was able to recognize for them and the small animals that Steve was able to catch.

In any other situation, Billy would prickle and not answer the question, but he can’t seem to lie to Steve about anything. “I was,” Billy says, voice antagonizing light. “But someone slit her throat.”Steve halts in his motion to bring food to his mouth, making a soft, crushing sound. Billy can’t make himself look up into his eyes and see the face that goes with the noise.

“Shit. That’s- shit. I should’ve found you earlier.” Billy barks a laugh, covering his mouth with his hand to stop any more noise from escaping. It’s a completely inappropriate and unexplainable reaction, one tinged with hatred and cruelty.

“Leave it to you to blame yourself. I should have been looking out for her more, not that she needed it. We were supposed to protect each other from everyone else, but I didn’t hold up my end.”

“Protecting people isn’t as easy as it sounds,” Steve says, and Billy wants to know what makes him sound so wistful. So lost.

“I don’t think it’s supposed to be easy,” Billy offers, consolidation in his tone. By now, he knows when to push and when to back off. “If it was, everyone would do it, but they don’t. Parents would always be perfect if it was that easy.”

“I guess so,” Steve agrees. “I think I’m just selling myself short.” Billy nods and runs a hand through his hair.

“Probably. I don’t know you that well, but that seems to be something you might have a tendency to do.” Billy offers Steve the other half of his bird leg as consolation for spilling his secrets.

“There could be some truth to that,” Steve allows, accepting the food and nodding in thanks. “It’s funny,” Steve starts again. Billy has a feeling that whatever Steve is about to say isn’t going to be funny at all. “When I was leaving, my parents didn’t show up to say goodbye. They just gave me a look when I left in the morning that said they would rather me die out here than come back that afternoon. It’s so fucked up.” And then Steve laughs, but it’s a hollow, hurtful laugh that rings too loudly through Billy’s ears.

“Mine didn’t either,” Billy admits softly. It’s easier, in the pale, shallow sunlight to say these things. Everything seems a little less golden and more faded, more of a color scheme Billy’s used to. “Well, my dad didn’t. My mom was somewhere far away forgetting that she has a son. My sister came, though.”

“My brother came,” Steve says, a light behind his eyes. “He told me to win for him if I couldn’t do it for myself. I think he probably blames himself for me being here, even though he shouldn’t. I swear he’s too smart for his own good most of the time.” Billy stands up and offers his hand to Steve, who accepts it and dust off his pants.

“This the same kid you talked about? Dusty?” Billy would listen to Steve talk about anything if it meant he gets to see the way Steve’s hand move through the air, excitedly flailing around. Billy makes himself look away and starts walking forward. He can hear Steve following behind him, so he continues walking forward.

“Dustin.” There’s a smile in Steve’s voice, a fondness that Billy drinks greedily. “His name is Dustin and he’s a pain in the ass, but he’s also the best thing to ever happen to me. I didn’t tell him that enough, I think.”

“You can tell him, you know.”

“What?” A branch snaps under Steve’s feet and he kicks a rock to the side, aimlessly walking forward.

“Tell Dustin that it’s not his fault. I’m sure he’s watching with the rest of Hawkins.” Billy says it casually, and Steve stares with those big brown eyes, his lips parted in surprise.

“That’s…suprisingly heartfelt for a guy who keeps putting weapons to my throat.” Steve takes a long look at Billy, who shrugs off the warm feeling inside.

“Don’t get too used to it,” Billy warns, looking away and trying to make the eye-contact mean less to him. By the way, his heart is beating, it doesn’t seem to work. He can blame it on the adrenaline. It’s easier like that, and he isn’t in the mood to torture himself right now.

“There’s that edge. I was missing the little spike of fear that usually comes when you open your mouth,” Steve teases, hands on his hips.

“You still scared of me, pretty boy? I think I’ve been real nice to you,” Billy says back, smiling finding its way to his face. It’s all teeth and sharp edges, but a smile nonetheless.

Steve scoffs. “I don’t think your behavior counts as “real nice.” I would say something closer to adequately non-threatening.”

“I’ll take it,” Billy says. “Even if I was hoping for charming and irresistible.”

“Maybe next time,” consoles Steve. “You only have room to improve.”

“I guess I’ll have to bank more on my good looks,” Billy adds thoughtfully, knocking his shoulder against Steve’s. “You think that’ll work?”

Steve hums in thought and gives Billy a look through his eyelashes. “You might have a chance. Depends on your behaviour.”

The promise is right behind Billy’s teeth, waiting to fall from his lips. “I’ll be on my best behaviour, Harrington. I swear. You won’t have any trouble from me.”

“Why don’t I believe you?” Steve laughs, stopping to look fully at Billy. “Did you have your fingers crossed?” His eyes are narrowed accusingly at Billy, his hands resting low on his hips.

“I guess I’ll just have to show you, then.” Billy’s grin is on the edge of feral as he stalks closer to Steve. To his credit, Steve doesn’t step back, but his hands don’t drop from his hips. When Billy is close enough to feel Steve’s warmth radiating off of him, he stops his feet and leans in close to Steve, breathing him in. Steve has gone silently still, his chest barely rising and falling with his shallow breaths. “Do you want me to show you?” Billy whispers next to Steve’s ear. A shudder runs down Steve’s spin and he nods mutely.

Billy takes a moment to savor the peace, the stillness, before he catches Steve’s lips against his in a hungry kiss. He lets himself, for a moment, get lost in Steve. The way his lips feel against Billy’s, the way he gasps so nicely into Billy’s mouth when Billy grabs him by the back of his neck and pulls him in closer.

There’s nothing gentle about it. It’s a clash of teeth and tongue. A push and pull. Billy never wants it to end. Steve’s body against his is fire-hot and solid, and Billy wants to devour him whole. It’s heat and need and pure desperation.

It’s the fact that they’re both going to die soon. Probably.

But reality comes crashing back down with a plea of Billy’s name from Steve’s lips. With that pretty sigh of his name, Billy’s mind fills with all the reasons he shouldn’t be doing this.

All of Hawkins is watching them right now. To them, it doesn’t matter if any of it is real or if Billy would never do this normally. They just see two teenagers, trying to find a way out of a dark maze.

They could be in danger. Someone could be watching them right now, wondering why Billy and Steve aren’t paying any attention at all to their surroundings and thanking whatever god they believe in that there are two targets out in the open, holding each other tightly. It’s hard to focus on that when Steve’s lips feel so right against his.

Not that Billy thinks he deserves this. It’s too right, too easy. It’s something fragile that he’s going to break, a thin, fragile plate dropped on a cement floor. Billy’s used to things being a fight, and when Steve was a fight, it was okay, but now it’s aggression and heat and blood running through his veins, but he’s content to just exist at the moment. It’s wrong.

It’s the prominent fact that, at this point, Billy could still win this. He could go back to his shitty house in District Six, where Neil would be waiting. Neil, who’s forced just like everyone else to watch the games, who’s probably sitting in the kitchen and staring out the window at the temporary screen put up in their neighborhood. Neil, who doesn’t have Billy to take his anger out on right now, could hurt Max or Susan for no reason at all. People get bruises all the time in District Six. No one would question a thing. They never did with him.

So he does something that makes Neil almost as mad. He pushes Steve away and runs madly to the edge of the clearing where the sky starts to lose its light.

Tripping over himself, tripping over roots, he scrambles away from Steve. He doesn’t know where he’s going, doesn’t know where anyone else is. He could be running straight into someone who wants to kill him, but he can’t seem to care. All he knows is that he’s running away from someone who doesn’t want to kill him, someone who definitely, by the way, he just kissed Billy back, and wants him to stay.

Billy wants to stay too, but his brain is on fire, screaming alarms coursing through him that he needs to leave.

Steve’s panicked voice follows him, tortures him. “Billy, fuck, wait, I-“ And then Steve’s chasing after him, stumbling the same way, long limbs flailing frantically to catch up to Billy.

Billy’s stronger and faster. He knows that, and Steve should too. But maybe, maybe there’s a part of Billy that wants to be caught, while no part of Steve wants to let Billy go. At least, Billy hopes.

As fast as he started, Billy stops running. He turns around to Steve, faces him, and squares his shoulders, ready for a fight. “If you’re going to hurt me, do it now.”

“Hurt you? You’re the one who ran away. And don’t.” Steve’s voice is low, dangerous. With anyone else, it would send Billy’s mind into panic, into defense mode. With Steve, he just wants to listen, and hold into every word. “Don’t ever run away from me like that. I don’t care what messed up shit is waiting for you back home, I don’t care if it means you’ll never look at me again. Shit, I don’t care if it means you’re going to beat me bloody. But don’t leave like that. I- I just want to- need to know that you’re safe. That you’re okay.”

“Why do you care so much?” Billy asks. He means for it to sound meaner than it does, but it drifts between them, emotional and breathless, heartbroken and scared.

“You’re”-Steve starts, running a hand through his hair, musing it to where it sticks in all directions-”You’re fucking electric, and I don’t want to deny myself anything if we're going to die anyways. But don’t let it go to your head.”

“Steve,” Billy whispers, feeling himself slip away in the moonlight of Steve’s eyes. It’s harder to control himself like this. “I don’t know how to do this.”

Steve’s features soften, his hands reaching out for Billy, flexing at his sides. “I don’t either, okay? But we can figure it out. It’s not like it matters if we fuck it up, right? Only one of us is making it out of here.”

“It better be you, then.” Billy means it as a joke, but it falls short. It hangs between them and stretches on.

For a moment, Steve looks confused, his brow furrowing in the middle. “What?”

“I can’t go back home after this. Not after this. Not after us,” Billy explains, looking into Steve’s eyes, trying to make his voice as sympathetic as possible.

“What?” Steve asks, just as confused. “Why not?” Billy doesn’t want to be the one to tell Steve, to break that pretty fantasy in Billy’s mind of them going back to a perfect world.

“Steve,” Billy sighs. “I just kissed you in front of the world. Back home, people turn blue and black for things like that.” He keeps it vague. Not I’ve turned blue and black for things like that. He doesn’t give gory details or names. He’s not that sure that he won’t ever see home again.

“Well, I think it’s best case scenario if all we get is a few bruises,” Steve says, and Billy really wishes he could tell his mind the same thing, but he can’t. There’s always going to be that feeling at the back of his neck that doesn’t let him think about best-case scenarios without thinking of his lonely kitchen and hole-patched roof.

But there’s also a certain comfort in the inevitability of their death. The odds are stacked against them, so why not take advantage of them?

Billy just wants his mind to calm down, he wants the screaming alarms to quiet in the background. It doesn’t seem like Steve can give him that, but maybe Steve’s noise can be louder than Billy’s fears.

“I guess you’re right,” he admits softly. Steve looks so warm and inviting in the warm glow of the fading sunlight.

Apparently, his thoughts show on his face, because Steve opens his arms wide and grins lopsidedly. “Come here, you idiot, so I can kiss you how I want to,” Steve asks softly, holding his arms out.

“You should ask nicer,” Billy says just to give Steve shit, but he’s already lost the battle in his mind to go straight into Steve’s arms before Steve asks.

This time, it’s different. Steve takes his time, eyes staring into Billy’s, leaning in slowly, waiting for Billy to protest. Billy’s eyes flutter shut and he lets himself get lost.

Get lost in dreams of those pretty brown eyes, so kind and so cunning, looking past the cracked glass that makes up Billy’s walls. There’s no part of Billy that can forget where they are, what they’re supposed to be doing right now, and the blood hunt that awaits behind every tree, but he can get lost in Steve’s eyes and his hands happily.

“Billy,” Steve sighs, pulling away and resting his hands on the sides of Billy’s neck, encasing him in warmth unlike any other. “Don’t run away again. Please.”

“I won’t.” Billy lets his voice go soft and he makes his eyes as gentle as they can be. All the gentleness he hasn’t used over the years has been saved up for now with Steve. “I’m here for you until the cannons go off.”

“That’s not as romantic as you think it is,” Steve grins, but he doesn’t let go of Billy.

Billy smiles and sets his hands on Steve’s waist, pulling him in closer and kissing him on the jaw. “Really? I thought it was fairly clever.”

Steve hums and runs his hands along Billy’s back, skittering them along his spine in a comforting, rocking motion. It’s something that Billy’s mom used to do to calm him down after bad nights with Neil.

“Your hands are shaking,” Billy laughs, reaching behind his back and taking one of Steve’s hands between two of his own. “They don’t usually do that.”

“How do you know that?” Steve asks, tilting his head to the side.

“I’m observant,” Billy says flatly. He can see the gears turning behind Steve’s eyes, and he tries his best to calm those thoughts.

“That’s more than being observant, Billy,” he says softly.

“I notice things,” he tries again, hoping Steve will get the hint and drop the topic. Steve, however, has a firm set to his jaw and a look in his eyes that tells Billy that the denial is fruitless.

“You notice behaviour,” Steve says, “Because you want to be able to recognize signs of danger. From me.” There’s a hint of betrayal in Steve’s tone that Billy doesn’t want to deal with right now, so he tries to explain the best that he can.

“It’s not that I’m noticing your behaviour more than others, I take note of everyone’s behaviour. I would do the same thing if you were Heather or my little sister.”

Steve’s nodding along, but Billy can see the pain in his face. Somehow, Steve must be able to see that Billy’s not going to talk more about it, because he softly says, “Okay,” and they move on.

*

They walk for hours, not sure what to do. They know what they’re not going to do, but as long as no one finds them, there’s nothing that they should be doing. With enough food to last until tonight, they don’t have to gather more and they shouldn’t sit in one place for too long, at least that’s what Steve thinks, and Billy’s inclined to agree with whatever Steve says right now.

The stars are hanging heavy overhead, and a cool breeze is filtering through the air. Now’s as good a time as any to settle for the night, so Billy finds them another rock outcropping where they’ll see anyone coming before anyone else sees them.

They eat with Steve’s thigh pressed against Billy’s, berries and leftover meat in a pile on the rock in between them. It’s not too cold now, luckily, but Billy’s a little worried about how the night is going to turn out. But he’s got Steve to keep him warm. “So, Steve, what do you do in your free time?”

“Are you trying to make small talk?” Steve laughs. Then, softer, he says, “You called me Steve.”

“That’s your name isn’t it?” Billy asks, confusion in his voice. “Please don’t tell me that I’ve been wrong this whole time.” He runs his hand over his face and looks nervously at Steve.

“No, no it is. You’ve just- you’ve never called me Steve before.”

“No way that’s true,” Billy denies, thinking back. “No, I’m pretty sure I’ve called you Steve before.”

“You have not,” Steve scoffs. “It’s always Harrington or Pretty Boy or anything besides Steve.” Billy shakes his head, but doesn’t say anything more. They finished the rest of their food in silence, a peaceful air of nothing in between them.

Once their packs are cleared away, they settle next to each other, laying flat on the rock, cold stone digging into their backs. It’s somehow soothing and cathartic to be here with Steve, his hair pillowed out underneath his head, Steve’s hand skimming against his own.

“We don’t see a lot of the stars in District Two,” says Steve quietly, like he’ll scare the stars away. “Too much light pollution of some shit.”

Billy thinks back to his house, where there was a hole in the roof right above his makeshift bed. He could see the stars through it on some nights. He knows because he used to make wishes for them. Wishes that his mom would come back, wish that Neil would disappear, wish that Billy would disappear.

“In District Six, there were stars some nights, when the night shifts didn’t have as many people. If I was working, when my shift ended we would go outside and stare up and the stars. I was always pretending to be somewhere else, and I think everyone else was too. It was easier, at night, to imagine that the smell of gasoline and oil is just part of the air.”

“Do you know any of the patterns the starts are supposed to make?” asks Steve, turning onto his side and looking hopefully over at Billy.

The thing is, Billy has absolutely no clue what any of the constellations are. He never had time to learn things like that, especially since there was no one there to teach him to pay attention to things like stars. One of the lessons they teach all of the kids in his district is to keep your eyes down to the ground, so looking for animals and names in the stars wasn’t really one of his priorities.

But Steve looks so excited to learn, and Billy doesn’t know how to say no, not when Steve’s hand is in his and he’s pressed up against Billy’s side. “Sure I do, pretty boy. Which ones do you want to learn about?”

“All of them,” Steve breathes, and who is Billy to say no to that?

They spend the first part of the night looking up at the stars, Billy pretending to know what he’s talking about and Steve hanging on to every word that leaves Billy’s mouth.

Billy doesn’t think that there’s actually a constellation of a fighter that’s called Max, but it’s nice to think that there is. It’s even nicer when Steve asks him to tell the stories behind the names, and Billy gets to make up tales about heroes and villains, about good guys winning and being cemented in the universe’s storybook.

Eventually, Steve falls asleep in the crook of Billy’s shoulder. His hair brushed against Billy’s chin, and he leans into it, into the inherent comfort that Steve provides.

Staying awake is easy when he can’t imagine a better dream than the moment he’s in.

[steddieas-shegoes]

i'm glad i get forever to see where you end

for @messessentialist's birthday. i already said it all on ao3, but i love you biiiiitch. happy birthday, kissin you on the lips with tongue, cuddling you while we steal cool rocks from national parks (allegedly).

rated e | 14,135 words | cw: minor character deaths offscreen, brief discussion of grief and mourning, alcohol | check ao3 for all tags

🎣🎣🎣🎣🎣

He stares down at the paper in his hands. He thought he’d feel relief, maybe a tiny bit of happiness that he’d never admit to. He even considered that he might feel a small speck of sadness the day his brother died.

But all Wayne Munson feels right now is disbelief and anger, and he doesn’t know where to hide it before Eddie gets home.

“God damn idiot. Couldn’t even have the decency to die of old age. Had to go and get killed behind bars,” Wayne mutters under his breath as he folds the paper and slips it back into the envelope, hoping that keeping it out of sight might help him come to terms with the emotions flooding his chest. “Bullshit.”

Wayne is tired. He feels exhaustion in his bones, even in his fresh retirement.

For some, retirement is a time to reflect on the life you’ve lived and experience the things you couldn’t while you worked and raised a family. For others, retirement never happens at all.

For Wayne, retirement is a reminder that he almost lost his nephew, his son, and the government had to make sure he wouldn’t say a damn thing about how.

He knows he shouldn’t complain, but damn he sure would like to.

And now he has to figure out a way to tell Eddie that his father got killed in prison. The letter doesn’t say much, just that it was violent and the person responsible for his death is facing further consequences. As if Wayne cares about that. As if it helps explain this situation to a boy who already lost enough.

He sighs as he grabs a beer from the fridge and glances at the clock. Eddie should be home soon. He can’t hold onto this for too long; The news will get out soon enough and he’ll hear it from somewhere else, somewhere who won’t take the time to see what Eddie needs.

He takes a sip of the beer, then another, hoping the next taste of the bitter hops will help him decipher what he needs to say to Eddie.

It’s almost a blessing that Eddie doesn’t arrive home for another hour, giving Wayne time to finish his beer and get started on dinner.

Wayne is already prepared to ask Steve to head out tonight instead of linger, using the excuse of making sure Eddie doesn’t need anything before he goes. Usually Wayne finds it endearing, and hopes Eddie can see what’s so obvious there, but not tonight.

But Steve doesn’t walk in with Eddie.

Eddie’s humming something when he walks in, setting his cane against the table before sitting down in a chair and looking at Wayne with a smile.

“Hey, Wayne. How’s your day been?”

Wayne knows he’s about to ruin Eddie’s day at the very least and he’s not sure if he wants that task. He silently curses Al Munson again, wishing for someone to show up and say it was a mistake just so he doesn’t have to do this.

“Oh, boring. Ya know I hate retirement,” Wayne says as he brushes off the stress, tries to figure out a way to lead in to the news naturally. “Too much time on my hands.”

“You love fishing, though. Thought that’s where you went all morning.”

Wayne nodded. “You’re right about that. Guess I just like keeping my mind busy.”

He’s met with silence, which leads him to looking over to the table, where Eddie is staring at the envelope the letter came in.

Why did he leave it out in the open like that? It’s clearly marked from the prison.

“What’s this?” Eddie asks, always curious to the point of danger. “Dad get out?”

This was one of the worst things Wayne ever had to do and that’s saying something. Vietnam wasn’t for the weak, losing the love of his life nearly killed him, and seeing Eddie in a hospital bed after just barely escaping death is something he’d feel deep in his chest for years. But this was up there.

“No, son,” Wayne sighed, turning away from the pot on the stove. Beef stew and bread with butter was one of Eddie’s favorites, but it took a lot of work. That didn’t matter as much as making sure Eddie had support. “They sent a letter to let me know your dad passed away.”

Eddie didn’t look away from the letter. He was playing with the rings on his fingers, replaced by Steve the moment he realized they were missing in the hospital.

“Did they say how?” Eddie finally asked, still not looking up at Wayne.

“They just said another inmate was responsible. I don’t know any details. I’m sorry, Ed. Really sorry.”

And he is. Despite the fact that Al was a terrible father and made Eddie’s life harder than it should have ever been, he knows Eddie must have a lot of complicated emotions.

“Welp!” Eddie claps his hands on his thighs before finally looking back up at Wayne. “Guess that’s that.”

“It…is?” Wayne is trying to watch for any sign of discomfort or sadness, maybe anger. He sees none.

“Yeah. Not like I’ve really had him around to feel much of a loss.” Eddie smiles. It’s not fake, at least not according to Wayne’s judgment. “You’ve been my dad more than he ever was.”

Wayne feels warmth spreading in his chest at the thought of Eddie seeing him as his parent. It makes sense, but he’s never outright said something. Sure, he gave him Father’s Day cards, often handmade. And yeah, he braved a fishing trip every year for Wayne’s birthday because he knew it meant a lot to him. There was that one time he’d called him Dad when he was on morphine in the hospital.

Hearing it changes something in Wayne.

“You really feel that way, kid?” Wayne asks, sitting down at the table across from Eddie.

“Yeah. I kinda thought you knew that already.”

“Guess it’s nice to hear anyway.”

They don’t say anything else. They don’t need to.

A few minutes goes by before Wayne stands up and walks over to the stew, giving it a stir and taking a spoonful out to test the carrots and beef.

“Is that beef stew?” Eddie asks as the scent hits him.

“Sure is.”

“You were worried about how this was gonna go, huh?” Eddie teases, smirk evident in his voice.

“A little. Can’t blame me, can ya?” Wayne decides it’s done and turns off the stove. He’s grabbing two bowls from the cabinet when the front door opens.

“You forgot the meds!” Steve yells as he runs into their kitchen with a bottle of prescription pills in his hand. He freezes when he sees Wayne dishing out stew. “Sorry. Uh. Am I interrupting?”

Wayne laughs around a sigh, reaching up to grab a third bowl.

“No, have a seat, son. Just gettin’ ready to eat.”

Eddie stands and limps his way to Steve, taking the pill bottle to pocket it before he leans further in his space.

“I’m an orphan!”

Steve’s jaw drops and Wayne does all he can not to laugh. It’s not funny, and he knows that Eddie’s probably not processing the news properly yet, but he’d rather laugh than cry.

“Sorry, what?”

“My dad’s dead. The biological one in prison. Rest in peace to the man who gave me, like, two useful skills and musical talent.” Eddie is still leaning into Steve’s space and Wayne’s watching, waiting.

“I’m sorry, Eddie, that sucks.”

“Nah, it sucks that he was such a shitty dad I barely even feel sad that he’s dead.” Ah, there it is. That’s why he’s doing better than Wayne expected. “I’ve got Wayne.”

“Damn right,” Wayne adds as he pulls spoons out of the drawer. “Let’s eat.”

Steve seems lost for a moment as he looks between Wayne and Eddie, unsure what else to say in this admittedly strange situation.

He finally grabs two bowls off the counter and sets them in his and Eddie’s spots at the table.

“Let’s eat.”

- - -

Two days pass before it really hits Eddie.

Wayne’s been waiting.

Nothing major happens. Eddie doesn’t break down in tears or lash out in anger. He doesn’t even mention saying goodbye in some way.

“We should go on a trip.” He says to Wayne while they’re eating breakfast.

“What kinda trip?” Wayne asks without looking up from his newspaper.

“Camping. Or maybe cabin-ing. Somewhere with walls and running water.” Eddie sounds breathless, like he’s run a marathon. Wayne finally looks up and sees the look in his eyes. “Could go fishing and roast marshmallows and swim and stuff. Like that one time.”

He’s talking about the trip they took together a few months after he moved in permanently. His mama was gone and his dad was sitting in jail waiting for sentencing on an armed robbery turned homicide. Wayne wanted to get Eddie’s mind off everything before he had to go back to school, so he took him up to a friend’s cabin at the lake for a few days.

Eddie’s never been an outside person, but they had fun there.

It was the first time Wayne felt like Eddie was his.

It may have been the first time Eddie felt safe with Wayne, too.

“I could see if that cabin’s available. My buddy doesn’t rent it out much anymore so I’m sure he’d be fine with us using it.”

“Could Steve come?”

“Sure.”

He agrees without a second thought.

This is Eddie’s way of seeking comfort in the people he has left, he can see it from a mile away. If Eddie needs Steve to come with them, it’s no skin off Wayne’s back.

Plus, Wayne can recognize how badly Steve needs to relax. He can’t believe someone as young as him walks with so much tension in his shoulders and lines on his forehead.

“Sweet. He’s never been fishing,” Eddie explains. “Or hiking in the right side up. At least not proper hiking. I guess we aren’t really doing proper hiking. I’m wearing jeans. Can’t be real hiking.”

Wayne smiles down at the sports section of the paper, nodding and humming in agreement when Eddie recommends something else for their trip.

- - -

Steve tries insisting on taking his car as his contribution to the weekend, but Wayne tells him they need the space in his truck for all their gear. It occurs to him when Steve just blinks back at him that Eddie didn’t explain how much is actually involved in all this.

But Wayne takes the time to show him some of the stuff he already has packed in the bed of his truck.

“I thought we were staying in a cabin. Why do we have a tent?” Steve sounds nervous when he asks.

“It’s not a full tent. Just a canopy to hang up to protect us from the sun if we get caught up somewhere during our hike.”

“Hike?” Steve turns towards the trailer, glaring at Eddie, who is too busy trying to figure out which of his sneakers to wear to notice. “He didn’t say anything about hiking. I don’t have boots or, or, anything!”

Wayne grabs Steve’s shoulders, looks him in the eye, and lets out a laugh.

“Do ya think Eddie would agree to go on a hike that requires special boots?” Wayne shakes his head. “Don’t think I could bribe him to go on anything but an easy trail unless that Lars guy from Metallica was at the end of it.”

“So I’ll be fine in my Nikes?” Steve clarifies.

“Better than.” Wayne turns back to the truck bed. “I grabbed an extra pole for ya, but it’s a bit short. We can make it work, though.”

Steve stares at everything piled into the truck. Wayne stares at Steve.

He can’t read him quite like he can read Eddie, not yet, but he’s got a feeling that Steve’s overwhelmed by the effort. Wayne doesn’t know much about his upbringing, but he can imagine it was pretty lonely what with his parents being gone more than they were home.

He’s certain Richard Harrington wouldn’t even know how to cast a line, let alone catch a fish.

“Wayne! Should I just bring both?” Eddie’s standing barefoot on the top step of the deck, holding two pairs of sneakers up.

“Sure, Ed.” Wayne looks down at his bare feet and wrinkles his nose. “Don’t forget your socks.”

“Does he do that a lot?” Steve asks, still staring at everything in the truck.

“Not so much anymore. When he’s got a lot on his mind, though, he forgets little stuff. Socks, underwear, eating.” Wayne could go on, but he’s pretty sure Eddie will kill him if he does. “He’s excited for this trip so it probably isn’t at the front of his mind.”

“Right, yeah. I noticed that.” Steve finally looks at Wayne, small smile on his face. Fond, Wayne would say. “He was so caught up on picking up the kids for game night, he forgot the games.”

“Sounds like our boy,” Wayne said, waiting for any kind of negative reaction from Steve at his words.

But Steve’s smile grew, his cheeks flushing a light pink. He looked over at where Eddie had been standing moments ago, and Wayne watches him.

“Steve, I feel like-“

“Wayne! We forgot hot dogs!” Eddie calls from inside the trailer, front door wide open allowing him to see Eddie’s movement by the fridge. “And buns!”

Steve looks back at Wayne. “I can run and get some while you finish up here.”

“I already grabbed them. Check that red cooler and the bag next to it,” Wayne gestured towards three coolers along the side of the truck bed. “He wasn’t payin’ attention when I told him I was packin’ everything.”

“Not surprising.”

“We got it all Ed! Throw your bag in and let’s go!” Wayne calls towards the trailer. “He’s gonna throw a fit about ridin’ in the middle, but that’s what he gets for bein’ a bean pole.”

Steve snorts as he walks over to open the passenger door. “He’ll live.”

Wayne thinks Steve’s gonna fit right in.

- - -

The cabin is off the beaten path. It’s actually off of all paths. They’re lucky that Wayne’s friend visited recently to clear bushes and trees away so they could get to it.

Forest surrounds it on three sides, the lake is in the back.

It’s quiet, an escape for all of them, but especially for Eddie. Whatever thoughts are trying to cloud Eddie’s mind might just float away in the fresh air if he manages to relax enough.

They unload the truck efficiently, bringing everything inside except the fishing equipment, which stays on the front porch so Wayne can load it on the boat before nightfall. He doesn’t bother locking his truck up; There’s no one around for two miles at least.

Steve’s loading things into the fridge and Eddie’s…

“Where’s Ed?” Wayne asks as he grabs his duffel bag to bring to one of the bedrooms.

“Said he wanted to see how cold the water is,” Steve shrugs, shoving the beer to the side so he can make room for Eddie’s Mountain Dew. “Told him it’s probably not that cold since it’s August.”

“Anything less than boiling is too cold for that one,” Wayne chuckles. “I’ll go load the boat.”

He goes out the back door, immediately locating Eddie at the water’s edge. At least he didn’t go far. He was a bit of a flight risk at the best of times and these weren’t really the best of times.

His shoes and socks are off, sitting in the mix of sand and rocks that make up the shoreline. The rocks are smooth, worn down over thousands of years of water and animals and people. Perfect for skipping across the top of the water, splashes disrupting the calm of a lake with few visitors this close to the end of summer.

Wayne showed Eddie how to skip rocks years ago, not on this lake, but a much smaller one that they’d visited for the day the summer before he started high school. It took him about 100 tries before he got it, but when he did, he’d beamed back at Wayne, proud of himself for possibly the first time in his life.

But he’s not skipping rocks now. He’s standing at the shoreline, where the small waves break against the sand, staring out at the horizon. Wayne is tempted to leave him be, but he can’t.

He walks up behind him, makes sure to clear his throat so he isn’t completely startled when Wayne stops right where the water stops. It licks right at the toes of his boots, but they’re his work ones, steel-toe.

Eddie turns and gives him a small smile.

“Sorry, just wanted to dip my feet in.” Eddie apologizes as if Wayne would care that he’s already finding solace in the solitude of the lake.

“Stay out here as long as you want, kid. You okay?” Wayne watches as Eddie’s hands curl into fists and then relax against his thighs.

“Yeah. Thanks for bringing me out here. I’ll help load the boat,” Eddie offers, already turning towards Wayne fully and taking a step out of the water. Wayne holds his hand up to stop him. “What?”

“I got it. You can help pack the cooler in the mornin’.”

Eddie shrugs and turns back to the lake.

Wayne watches him for another minute, silent so he doesn’t disturb whatever thoughts are brewing in Eddie’s head.

As he walks back to the porch to grab the tackle boxes and poles for the boat, he sees Steve watching Eddie out the kitchen window, concerned frown and furrowed brow on his face.

Steve doesn’t notice him.

- - -

The first night is Wayne making dinner while Steve and Eddie argue over which side of the queen sized bed they’re sleeping on. He can’t help but laugh at how quickly it went from calmly suggesting the other person sleeps on the window side to personal insults.

When he hears Eddie say something about Steve’s hair being too big, he shouts for them to join him.

Dinner is relatively peaceful considering the warzone that was their shared bedroom moments before sitting down to eat. Everyone enjoys the chicken and green beans Wayne cooked, barely leaving any for leftovers. They talk about their plans for the morning, and Steve offers to clean up after they eat so Wayne can have an early night.

It’s kind of him, but he already knows their arguing is just gonna wake him up if they haven’t settled on the bed issue.

“How about you take turns sleepin’ by the window?” Wayne asks before agreeing to an early bedtime. “That way it’s fair.”

“But who has to sleep there tonight?” Eddie asks, sticking his tongue out at Steve.

“Rock, paper, scissors?”

“That’s stupid.”

Wayne raises his brow at Eddie’s crossed arms. “Draw straws then.”

“We don’t have straws.” Steve looks around the kitchen, trying to find something they can use in place of straws, but fails. “It’s fine. I’ll take the window.”

Wayne can tell he doesn’t want to, and he’s pretty sure he can guess why neither of them is thrilled with sleeping directly under a window that looks out into a dense forest, but Steve’s a self-sacrificial kind of guy. That’s been clear for as long as Wayne’s known him.

He also knows that Eddie, even as stubborn as he is, wouldn’t let a friend feel uncomfortable.

“I’ll take it tonight.” Eddie offers.

“No, it’s okay. I can take it.”

Wayne rolls his eyes. “Y’all will argue over anything.”

Steve and Eddie both turn to him with matching grins. “Mhm.” They agree in unison.

“Eddie takes window tonight,” Wayne says. “Steve can have it tomorrow night. Whoever catches the biggest fish this weekend gets to pick on the last night.”

“Sounds fair,” Steve nods, turning to Eddie to see if he agrees.

“Sure. Fair.” Eddie stands and starts clearing the drinks from the table.

Wayne decides to leave before he gets dragged into a new disagreement. He’s only got so much patience.

He’s not surprised to hear them go out the back door after the sun sets, voices quiet, but still audible through Wayne’s open bedroom window.

They don’t go far, just past the porch, about halfway to the water.

“You know, my dad would never have done anything like this with me,” Steve states, only a small hint of bitterness in his tone. “He didn’t believe in bonding time or whatever. Thought that was for fathers and sons who didn’t have a family business to maintain.”

“My dad never did either.” Eddie says back, and Wayne’s heart stops in his chest. “Probably couldn’t have stayed sober enough to make the drive to a place like this.”

Wayne waits for Steve to say something, anything. He waits for so long, he’s tempted to look out the window and see if he can see them under the light of the moon.

“Your dad didn’t deserve you,” Steve finally says, quieter than they’d been before, like he didn’t want to disrupt the quiet night with his words. “And you deserved better than him.”

“I had Wayne eventually. I have Wayne now.” Eddie replies just as quietly. “And you do too, ya know.”

Wayne isn’t much of a crier. He’s only done it a handful of times. But Eddie’s words make his eyes well up and his throat burn.

“He barely knows me,” Steve tries to argue.

“He knows enough. You were there for the worst of my shit. You still stick around. You’re here right now even though you could’ve turned down his invitation.” Eddie sounds like he’s holding back tears now. “If you mean a lot to me, you mean a lot to Wayne. You’ll just have to get used to it.”

Wayne wishes he could be a part of this conversation, or at least be able to see them both. He’s respecting their space as much as he can, though. He’s laying in his bed and biting back tears the way any respectful uncle would.

“I’m not used to meaning so much to someone.”

Wayne isn’t sure he hears him right, his voice breaking halfway through, but Steve couldn’t have said anything else.

He should stop listening. This is turning into something else entirely, he thinks. He shouldn’t hear whatever Eddie says next.

“You mean everything to me.”

Wayne closes his eyes, holds his breath, hopes that if Steve takes it the way he knows Eddie means it, that this doesn’t turn into a real fight. He hopes that Steve’s reaction is kind, even if it’s not what Eddie wants.

Wayne’s almost grateful that he can’t hear what Steve says next. Whether it’s rude or loving, he doesn’t want to be a part of this moment like this. He can’t close his window, they’d hear it. He can’t leave his room, he’ll just be in view when they come back inside.

He waits one minute, two, three. He hears a twig snap and then quiet giggling.

He smiles to himself as he hears footsteps heading back towards the cabin.

🎸🎸🎸🎸🎸

Eddie wakes up with Steve’s arms around him and something bubbling in his chest.

Could be heartburn, or it could be the love that’s been growing inside him for months.

He remembers their conversation last night, looking up at the stars and listening to the leaves gently brushing against each other in the breeze, and he can’t help the blush on his cheeks. When Steve kissed him last night, he was pretty sure he was dreaming.

This wasn’t a dream, though.

They stayed up way too late. Eddie knew the moment he looked at the clock as they got into bed and saw 1:48 in bright red that he’d struggle today.

He could hear Wayne moving around the cabin, probably making coffee and breakfast for them since they’d need an early start for fishing. It wasn’t Eddie’s favorite thing to do, but Wayne loved it, and Eddie loved Wayne.

Steve groaned as he moved one arm above his head.

Eddie looks up at him, blushing harder when Steve’s half-lidded eyes are already looking down at him. He’s smiling, cocky if Eddie’s reading him right.

“Sleep okay?” Steve’s sleep-raspy voice asks, fingers gliding across Eddie’s upper arm in unknown patterns.

“Mhm. Not long enough,” Eddie admits. “Could stay in bed.”

Steve hums in agreement before seemingly realizing that Wayne’s already up. “Don’t think we can skip out on Wayne, though.”

This is why Eddie has a hard time pushing his feelings down for Steve. He’s done this before, whether he realizes he did or not.

In the hospital, the day after he’d woken up, Steve had stopped by to bring some clothes for Wayne since he refused to leave Eddie’s side. The kids had apparently been hounding him to take them with him, but he stood his ground and told them that Eddie needed time with just Wayne right now and that he needed rest.

A few weeks later, Steve could’ve easily taken Eddie home by himself, but insisted on waiting for Wayne to get off of work to do it.

Just a week ago, Wayne had forgotten a few things at the store, and when Steve overheard him grumbling about having to make another trip, he offered to go.

That’s just who Steve is.

Eddie loves him for it.

“Yeah. He’d be so bored without me scaring the fish away with my constant humming and leg jiggling,” Eddie agrees seriously. “Wouldn’t want him to miss me.”

Steve lets out a loud laugh, and Eddie hides his pleased smile in Steve’s chest.

He can’t believe he’s doing this right now, can’t believe Steve’s arm tightens around him, pulls him closer so all he can feel and smell is Steve.

“You could just stay quiet while we fish,” Steve suggests, as if Eddie hasn’t thought of that already. “Just for a little bit.”

“That sounds boring.”

Steve pokes Eddie’s cheek with his other hand. Eddie nips at his fingertip before Steve can pull away. They both laugh.

It’s easy.

A knock on the door interrupts the casual cuddling, but Eddie knows it’s not because Steve’s ashamed to be caught with him like that. Steve isn’t used to this being okay.

“You boys up?” Wayne’s voice is barely muffled through the door, something Eddie notes for later.

“Yeah!” Eddie calls back, though he probably didn’t need to speak more than normal volume.

Steve is tense below him. Eddie hates that.

He tries to soothe him by running his hand along his side, memorizing the bumps of his scars, keeping his breathing even so Steve would calm down. Wayne wouldn’t walk in without Eddie telling him he could, but Steve must’ve assumed he didn’t respect his space that much.

“Breakfast is done. Just made eggs and toast.” Wayne knocks once more on the door before they can hear his footsteps walking back to the kitchen.

Steve relaxes and sighs.

“You don’t have to do that.” Eddie still traces along the scar on his hip. “Wayne’s cool.”

“I know.” Steve goes to sit up, but Eddie holds him down. “Eddie, I know. It’s okay. I didn’t mean to react like that.”

“There’s a price to pay before you get up.”

Steve snorts. “And what’s that?”

“A kiss.”

Steve kisses the top of Eddie’s head.

“Unfortunately, I won’t be accepting that form of payment.”

Steve’s hand cups Eddie’s cheek, thumb rubbing slowly as he guides his face up to look at him. Eddie hopes he can’t feel the heat on his skin, but the odds aren’t great.

“One kiss.”

“Only one?” Eddie pouts.

“Don’t wanna get carried away when we’re supposed to be getting up.” Steve leans in until his breath is hot against Eddie’s lips. “So one kiss and then you let me leave so we can go fishing with your uncle.”

“Fine.” Eddie can’t help smiling into the kiss. It’s quicker than he wants, but it’s perfect. When Steve pulls away, Eddie groans and falls flat on his back. “What if we fake sick?”

“You’re ridiculous,” Steve laughs as he gets out of bed and tries to get changed into regular clothes.

Eddie watches him, can’t wipe the smile off his face as Steve nearly trips over his own pant leg. He doesn’t even care if Steve catches him looking, not anymore.

He gets to look now.

After Eddie’s confession last night, after their first kiss, and the second and third, and talking for two hours by the water, it was pretty obvious that they were skipping over that new relationship awkwardness. Eddie hadn’t quite said he loved Steve, and Steve hadn’t said it either, but actions spoke louder than words. The way they couldn’t stop touching, the way Steve looked at Eddie while he talked about his most recent adventure with Dustin, the way Eddie watched Steve throw rocks as far as he could into the depths of the lake, it was all love.

“If you keep looking at me like that, I’m never leaving this room.” Steve is looking at him as he buttons his jeans and Eddie is considering sending Wayne on his own.

He waited months for this, but now it felt like waiting another hour was too much.

“Looking at you like what?” Eddie asks innocently.

“Like you wanna eat me.”

“Well…” Eddie wiggles his eyebrows and taps the bed. “I could eat breakfast in bed if you get back in it.”

Steve walks over to the bed, leans over Eddie, gets close enough to nip at his top lip.

“Get out of bed.” He presses a quick kiss to Eddie’s lips before walking to the door. He leaves it open as he leaves the room without looking back.

Eddie curses Steve’s ability to get him to do anything, and reluctantly gets out of bed. He throws on his shorts, a tank top, and ties his bandana in his hair so he doesn’t have to worry about it sticking to his forehead.

When he gets to the kitchen, Wayne and Steve are staring out the window and whispering.

“I didn’t think we’d see a marsh hawk. Population’s been down for the last decade,” Wayne’s saying as Eddie walks up on his other side. “I’ve only seen one before and that was during a trip to Lake Michigan when I was 14 or 15.”

Eddie looks out the window, trying to see what they see. He’s not sure what a marsh hawk looks like, but he’s assuming it’s one of the birds in the nearby trees.

Steve wordlessly points it out to him.

“That’s a cool bird.” Eddie says at a normal volume. The bird spreads its wings out, acting as if it might take off. It’s beautiful, the white along its beak and chest a stunning contrast to its dark brown wings.

“It’s good luck to see one in some cases,” Wayne whispers as he turns away from the window. “Seeing one on your wedding day is supposed to lead to a long and happy marriage.”

“Too bad no one’s getting married here today,” Eddie remarks as he grabs a plate and starts to scoop eggs onto it.

“Not married. But still good luck,” Steve mutters as he follows Eddie. “So we just have to grab the cooler on our way out?”

Wayne nods. “And the bait.”

“I thought we used plastic stuff.”

“We use lures, but we put worms on there to get the fish to actually bite,” Wayne explains. “I’ve got plenty of stuff for bass, but I dunno how lucky we’ll be.”

Eddie nods along as he takes a huge bite of toast. “One time we forgot worms and had to use hot dogs.”

“Fish eat hot dogs?” Steve asks in surprise.

“Some fish settle for hot dogs. They don’t quite realize ‘til it’s too late that it ain’t their food,” Wayne shrugs. “But we got plenty of worms for this trip. Should be perfect fishing conditions.”

They all ate in silence after that, but Eddie could feel Steve’s nerves building the closer they all got to clean plates.

Steve didn’t have to say it for Eddie to know he desperately wanted to impress Wayne, especially now that they were…something. They probably needed to clarify exactly what they were at some point soon. They would. Eventually. Tonight maybe.

Or tomorrow.

“I’ll clean up if you boys wanna finish getting ready.” Wayne offered as he scraped the last of his eggs onto his fork.

Eddie took him up on his offer, jumping up to go brush his teeth and get his sneakers on.

“You comin’?” He asks Steve, who’s still slowly eating the eggs he drenched in ketchup.

“Just a second,” Steve replies with his mouth full. “You can use the bathroom first.”

Eddie nods and leaves the room.

He hears the sink in the kitchen running a few seconds later, and the hushed voices of Wayne and Steve having a whispered conversation. He could sneak back, try to listen in, but he thinks that maybe Steve needs this minute alone with him.

He finishes what he needs to do quickly, though, and admittedly sneaks back towards the kitchen quieter than he normally would, hoping to overhear something interesting.

But all he walks into is Steve laughing as Wayne smiles back.

Eddie doesn’t find that he minds much, as long as they’re both happy.

🎸🎸🎸🎸🎸

Being on the boat is different as an adult.

The last time Eddie fished with Wayne on a boat, he was barely shoulder height on him and 100 pounds soaking wet. It was a much smaller boat, though, barely fit two grown adults comfortably.

This boat, however, was built for a family of at least four adults. The awning covered half of the boat, so Eddie didn’t have to sit in direct sunlight when the sun finally rose.

Steve stood to the side, watching Wayne prep the lures and bait, casting his own line out and reeling it in until it was taut. Eddie went next, making a show of it just like he always did. Wayne doesn’t comment, just shakes his head and smiles fondly as he watches the water.

“Um,” Steve starts. “I guess it’s my turn.”

Eddie’s pretty sure Wayne knows Steve’s nervous. It’s hard not to tell with how quiet he’s been the entire ride to the middle of the lake.

Wayne sets his pole in the stand at the stern, and turns to Steve with his hands on his hips. “You saw how I cast mine?”

Steve nods, but doesn’t look sure. Eddie’s not really used to seeing Steve anything less than confident, even in the face of monsters.

It hits him the moment he thinks about monsters.

They’re on a lake. A lake very similar, though much larger, to the same lake that almost dragged Steve to his death. A lake he’d previously trusted, and no longer could.

Eddie doesn’t say anything, just subtly places his hand against Steve’s hip, offering whatever comfort he can. Steve won’t admit he’s scared, but Eddie doesn’t need him to.

Wayne sees it, Eddie knows he does. But because he’s the best uncle, he doesn’t say anything.

He raises a brow and then schools his features back to a comforting smile before showing Steve how to hold the pole so he can cast it comfortably and far enough out that movements from the boat don’t scare the fish from the hook.

Eddie watches, and he sees the nerves slowly easing from Steve’s shoulders, his forehead, and his arms. He relaxes inch by inch, and Eddie couldn’t be more in love.

Wayne steps back so Steve can cast his line.

When the bobber hits the water, Wayne smiles and pats his shoulder. “Good job, son. Now reel it in a bit so you can feel if something bites. Good. Now we just wait.”

Steve turns red at the praise and Eddie realizes that Steve probably hasn’t heard a “good job” from an adult in a very, very long time.

Eddie’s childhood was fucked, but at least Wayne was there cheering him on, showing him what it meant to be proud of your kid eventually. He’s pretty sure Steve hasn’t had that for most of his life.

“How long do we wait?” Steve asks after a few minutes.

The lake is near silent, and the water is so smooth it looks like glass. If Eddie leaned over, he’d probably be able to see his reflection. The gentle lapping of water on the side of the boat and the distant sound of birds in the trees lining the water’s edge fills the air.

“I usually give it 10 or 15 minutes before reeling it in. Check my bait, maybe change the lure if there’s no bites.” Wayne’s watching the end of Steve’s line as he speaks. “I used bass lures on all of ours, but we might change them up in a minute. See what else is out there.”

Steve nods and turns back.

Wayne doesn’t take his eyes off of Steve’s bobber.

Eddie watches Wayne curiously.

Anytime he’s fished with Wayne, he’s left Eddie to his own devices after showing him what to do. He watches his own line, and only steps in to help if Eddie catches something and doesn’t wanna touch the fish.

Wayne’s eyes widen just as Steve exclaims, “Hey! Look!”

“Reel it in!” Wayne shouts, setting his pole down again and rushing to stand next to Steve.

Eddie turns and watches as Steve reels in whatever he’s caught. Judging by the bend in the pole, it’s a decent sized fish.

“Shit, what if it breaks?” Steve asks, voice shaking with the effort of trying to reel in the fish before it escapes.

“It won’t. Keep going.”

When they manage to get the fish out of the water and into the boat, Steve is breathless.

“Look at that!” Wayne holds up the line, right above where the hook is caught in the fish’s mouth, beaming at Steve. “Our boy got himself a king salmon!”

Ignoring his mention of “our” boy, Eddie steps closer and grips Steve’s shoulder, shaking him just enough to make the boat rock.

“How can you tell?” Steve asks Wayne, reaching out to hold the fish up himself.

“You see all these black spots on his back and fins?” Wayne points at a few of the spots. “Other salmon don’t have this many spots or any at all. You keepin’ him or throwin’ him back?”

Steve looks at Eddie, smile falling as he suddenly looks unsure about what the right thing to do is. Before Eddie can say anything, Wayne wraps his arm around Steve’s shoulders.

“Either is fine with me. Could cook him up for supper if you wanna keep him or send him back to his friends with a new piercing.” Wayne looks over at Eddie. “Eddie ain’t much for seafood, but I make a mean baked salmon.”

Steve nods. “Yeah, think I’ll keep this one.”

Wayne pats his shoulder again before showing him how to unhook the fish safely. He opens up the empty cooler he brought and places the fish inside.

Wayne moves to grab the bait so Steve can set up again, and while his back is turned, Eddie takes a chance.

He leans over and kisses the corner of Steve’s mouth.

“You’re a natural,” Eddie whispers as he leans away again.

“Shut up.” Steve is blushing that same pretty pink that he was last night and earlier this morning. Eddie can’t look away. “Just lucky.”

Wayne catches two rainbow trout and Eddie manages to catch a small northern pike, which quickly gets thrown back when Eddie starts to make up a story about how it’s a teenager who got separated from its parents. Wayne shakes his head as Eddie carries on, but he’s used to it. Eddie never keeps his catch if he’s lucky enough to have one.

They relax as the day warms up, popping open cans of soda as the sun gets closer to the middle of the sky. It’s not about fishing anymore; It’s about soaking up the tranquility of their surroundings.

Eddie isn’t known for being still or quiet, but even he can let himself enjoy this. Every day since March has been about survival, and appointments, and witness statements, and lawyers, and moving, and the kids. He feels like he’s barely even had time to think.

So while he sits on this boat with two of his favorite people, he thinks.

He thinks about how different his life is now, and how different it could still be.

He thinks about how much Wayne has sacrificed for him for most of his life, but especially the last five months.

He thinks about how much he wants to tell Steve he loves him.

He thinks he’ll tell him tonight.

📼📼📼📼📼

Steve sits on the porch while Wayne cleans the fish, staying a good distance away so he doesn’t end up seeing things that’ll make him wish he left the poor salmon in the lake. Eddie’s inside doing god knows what.

He’s never been happier.

He does wish Robin could be here, but she hates the outdoors. She didn’t even like going on her family’s beach trip last month.

Plus, he’s pretty sure he wouldn’t have been able to have the alone time he needed with Eddie last night if she were here. Even though she’s been telling him to just talk to him for the last three months, she wouldn’t have caught on to his plan.

Feeling this much for Eddie isn’t new.

After the events of spring break, Steve took a long, hard look at high school and realized that at least part of the reason he was always staring at Eddie was because he was very interested. He started looking for any excuse to stick around in Eddie’s hospital room, and then offered to take him to appointments, and it continued from there.

Now, they hang out almost every day. Sometimes it’s with the kids, sometimes with Robin, sometimes alone.

Steve realizes that even before they kissed and fell asleep holding each other and flirted as much as possible all day, this was the best relationship he’s ever had. He needs to tell Eddie as soon as they’re alone.

“All done,” Wayne says as he steps onto the porch, the container of cleaned fish in his hand. “You ready to learn the secret to makin’ the best fish?”

Steve is quick to nod, excited that Wayne thinks he’s even worth the time it’ll take to show him. Wayne’s been so kind this entire trip, making sure Steve is involved and welcomed, makes him feel like he belongs in their little family.

As Wayne grabs everything they’ll need, Steve sees Eddie through their bedroom door, writing in a journal, tongue poking between his lips as he concentrates. Steve’s never seen this journal, but he can assume it’s another one of his many already filled with songs and campaign ideas.

“You done starin’ at Ed?” Wayne’s voice is quiet behind him, but still makes him jump with surprise.

“Wasn’t staring at him. Thought I saw a…um…bug?” Steve knows he’s been caught halfway through trying to lie, so he moves on. “Ready?”

“Are you?” Wayne raises a brow and smirks.

“Yes!” Steve puts his hands on his hips. “What are you implying?”

“Mostly that you’re too in love with my nephew to focus on what I’m sayin’.”

Steve feels heat in his cheeks, but he chooses to ignore it and pretend that he can distract Wayne from what he’s saying.

“So we’re frying your fish and baking my salmon?” Steve starts holding up some of the spices Wayne’s set out on the counter. He can feel Wayne’s eyes on him. “Looks like you like spice.”

“Steve.” Wayne sighs. “It’s okay to feel however you feel. I ain’t gonna judge.”

“Right. Yeah.” Steve turns to finally look at Wayne, who looks sad. He shouldn’t look sad right now.

“Eddie ever tell ya about Paul?” Wayne starts filling one pan with oil and the other with a few small pads of butter.

Steve shakes his head, watching closely.

“Paul was my boyfriend when Ed first came to live with me.”

Steve’s eyes widen as that hits him.

“Woulda been my husband had we been able to be married.” Wayne starts mixing flour, salt, and pepper in a bowl while he talks. “He was a long haul truck driver. Gone for weeks at a time. Stayed with me when he passed through. Came home one day to Eddie asleep in the bed we usually shared and asked if I’d been up to something.”

Wayne smiles fondly down at the bowl of eggs, buttermilk, lemon juice, and garlic he’d started mixing together as he spoke.

“Told him everything. Expected him to call it quits. He didn’t sign up for raising a troubled kid, especially not one who may not be okay with what we had.” Wayne stops and looks up at Steve. “But he just hugged me and said he’d follow my lead. Whatever was best for Ed was what was best for us. Ain’t sure I could ever find a love like that again.”

Steve can feel tears trying to form in his eyes, but he manages to bite them back. He’s pretty sure he knows where this is going, but he listens without interrupting.

“Ed didn’t take too well to him at first. Probably ‘cause he was in and out so much, didn’t get time to bond with him like I did. Paul was patient. Always so patient with both of us.” Wayne shakes his head and looks down at the counter before he looks up smiling again. “Ed came out to Paul first, ya know? When he was 13. He’d gone on a short haul with him over the summer and when they came back, they were thick as thieves. Paul told me that night that Ed had told him he liked boys and it changed their entire relationship. I was Uncle Wayne, but Paul was like a dad to him. Definitely more than his own dad ever was.”

Wayne looked over to check that Eddie was still in the bedroom, distracted by his writing.

“Paul started taking short hauls instead of long ones. Only gone three or four days at a time instead of 14-20. Thought it was so he could be close to Ed, since we’d kinda become our own little family.”

Steve realizes he’s holding his breath when Wayne sniffs.

“He’d gotten sick and didn’t tell us. Started out thinkin’ it was pneumonia, but it got worse. Doctor thought it was heart problems, but it was everywhere. Leukemia. Untreatable by the time they figured it out.”

Steve’s wrapping his arms around Wayne before he even realizes he’s doing it, letting the tears fall as he thinks about how much pain Wayne and Eddie must’ve gone through to lose someone so important to them.

“Ed was barely 14 when he passed. I think he took it harder than me.”

Steve can’t even imagine. Wayne lost someone he loved, but Eddie lost a father figure after losing his real father to things he should never have had to compete with. And now Eddie’s father was really dead.

All he really has is Wayne.

“Kid shaved his head in solidarity when Paul lost what little hair he had left,” Wayne huffs a wet laugh as they pull away from each other. “Couldn’t believe it when I got home from work and they were both bald as cue balls. Thought they’d lost it.”

Steve and Wayne are both laughing, and it’s probably going to draw Eddie’s attention, but he kinda hopes it does. He could use Eddie’s closeness right now. He needs to see that he’s okay, that this didn’t completely destroy him, that he went on anyway.

But all Eddie does is yell at them to keep it down, which just makes them laugh harder.

“And you never dated anyone else?” Steve asks as Wayne starts putting his fishin the egg mixture. “Not even for fun?”

“Nah. Once Paul was gone, I had to work more to pay the bills. What little time I had was spent with Ed. He was my priority, always.”

Steve wipes the tears from his cheeks as he watches Wayne drop the fish into the hot oil.

“What about now?” Eddie was busy with his own life now, and they’d received enough money from the government to cover their new trailer and have plenty leftover to cover bills. Wayne was retired and had plenty of time to start dating again.

“I got lucky with Paul. It ain’t fair to compare any future relationship to what we had and I think that’s all I’d do. I’m happy the way things are for now.”

Steve drops it for now, but he makes a note to ask Eddie about it soon. He’s surprised Eddie never mentioned Paul, or even the fact that Wayne was gay, especially when he came out to Steve and Robin while he was still in the hospital.

Wayne goes on to explain how long he keeps the fish in the oil before flipping them to make sure the cooking is even, and how putting them onto paper towels to cool drains too much of the grease.

As Steve watches him prep the salmon with a glaze he made from garlic, honey, and lemon juice, Eddie finally comes out of the bedroom.

“Smells like fish,” he says with a grin.

“That’d be the fish.” Wayne doesn’t even bother looking over at him as he leans against the counter. “Salmon is already a tender fish, so you can bake it to whatever you prefer. It should only take about 10 minutes on 400 unless you like it extra crispy, then you may wanna do it for 13 minutes.”

“Chef Wayne teaching you everything you need to know?” Eddie asks Steve, stepping close enough for Steve to feel the heat coming from his body.

“He’s pretty talented. Might need to consider opening a restaurant,” Steve teases.

“Wait ‘til you have his steak. So tender you could cut it with a spoon.”

“Don’t know what you’re after with your compliments, but I’d rather ya just ask for it.” Wayne checked the clock as he closed the oven door.

“I was just bein’ nice!” Eddie exclaims, throwing his arms up in frustration. Steve never noticed how Eddie’s accent changes the more time he spends around Wayne, but he smiles to himself when it slips now. “See if I give ya a compliment again, old man.”

Steve watches as they banter back and forth some more, both of them smiling and laughing the entire time.

It’s nothing like what Steve was used to. His parents never bantered, only fought. Anything that was big enough for discussion, was big enough to yell about. As Steve got older, he learned that staying quiet and letting them get it out would usually turn out better for him. Luckily, once he reached middle school, they didn’t bother coming home enough for him to worry about what to do when they were arguing.

He doesn’t remember a time when there was fun and laughter between them, not even when he was a young child. He can remember his mom dancing with him while his dad was gone on business trips, but the moment he arrived home, the air became thick with tension and her attitude became somber. He remembers one time when his dad let him sit on his desk while he worked, making paper airplanes and having a competition to see how far they could fly, but the moment the phone rang, he was hissing a ‘get out’ with no explanation for the abrupt stop to the fun.

Steve couldn’t imagine talking to either of his parents the way Eddie talks to Wayne, but he also couldn’t imagine receiving the love from them that Wayne so easily gives to Eddie.

And now that he knows another piece of their story, he can see how they’ve come to be like this, comfortable with each other in ways many kids never are with their parents.

Steve’s mind continues to wander throughout dinner, but no one calls him out on it. Maybe Wayne somehow communicated with Eddie that they’d had a serious conversation. Maybe it was just obvious that Steve was far away from the table. Eddie and Wayne chattered as they ate, and Steve let the constant echoes of their voices be the background noise to his thoughts.

“Stevie?” Eddie’s hand touched his cheek, shaking him out of the path he was lost on. “Wayne’s gonna take a walk. You wanna go?”

Steve smiles up at Eddie before looking down at his plate. He barely remembers eating, but he only has a few small pieces of salmon left.

“Sounds good.”

Eddie looks concerned, but Steve brushes him off. He looks around, and when he doesn’t see Wayne in the room with them, turns his face so he can kiss Eddie’s palm.

“Should we grab the bug spray?” Steve asks as he stands, pushing in his chair and grabbing his plate off the table to wash it.

“Wayne’s got it outside. Think he put enough on for all of us,” Eddie follows close behind Steve. “You sure you’re okay?”

“Yeah. Just thinking.”

“About?”

“A lot.” Steve brushes it off so they can join Wayne. “Ready?”

Eddie nods and leads the way out of the cabin.

They ate an early dinner, so the sun is still high in the sky as they make their way down a trail that follows the lake’s edge. Eddie occasionally gets distracted by colorful rocks, holding them up excitedly for Steve and Wayne to acknowledge.

Steve knows the love he has for Eddie is written all over his face.

He doesn’t care to hide it.

Wayne’s quiet as they walk, occasionally pointing out a fish splashing in the distance or a heron standing in the water. He swats a mosquito away from Steve’s face, only for the mosquito to turn around and bite his hand. Eddie’s far too busy climbing over fallen limbs and branches of trees to notice what they’re doing.

“You boys should go for a swim when we get back. Water’s cool.” Wayne makes the suggestion without looking at Steve, who suddenly feels like he’s being studied under a microscope.

“Not sure if Eddie even brought a swimsuit.” Steve laughs it off, hopes they can go back to silence or change the subject.

“I’m sure you boys could figure something out.”

Thankfully, the topic gets dropped and Steve is left wondering if Wayne knows.

Sure, he joked about Steve being in love with Eddie earlier, but that wasn’t a confirmation that he knew they were together. He thought they’d been careful today, but maybe Wayne caught them when they kissed by the truck when Eddie was grabbing his wallet from the glovebox.

He doesn’t have time to think about it more because Eddie lets out a yelp and they can only watch as he falls on his ass into a muddy spot between two large rocks.

“I hate the outdoors,” he grumbles as he stands.

Wayne is laughing, but Steve is rushing over to make sure he’s okay.

“Are you hurt?” Steve’s hands are hovering over him, trying to figure out if he sees any blood. “Did you hit your head?”

“I’m fine, sweetheart,” Eddie replies quietly, holding his arms out as if trying to show proof. “My dignity may be a bit bruised.”

They’re interrupted by the hooting of an owl. It’s loud enough that Wayne shushes them and starts looking around at the trees surrounding them, trying to locate the creature.

It hoots again before Wayne locates it, pointing to a tree only ten feet away and to their right.

“Wow.” Steve says as he gets a close look at it, the white and tan feathers blending into beautiful patterns. “It’s so small. I thought owls were bigger.”

Eddie’s looking up at it, smiling.

To Steve’s shock, he’s the one who responds, not Wayne.

“It’s a northern saw-whet owl. They’re closer to the size of a robin than an owl you may be thinking of.” Eddie reaches for Steve’s hand and squeezes it once before letting it drop. “Paul taught me about all kinds of owls.”

Steve’s head snaps towards him. “You heard us this morning, didn’t you?”

“You weren’t quiet,” Eddie shrugged. “I used to be obsessed with nocturnal animals. He bought me a book about bats and owls for Christmas and went through it page by page with me.”

“I remember that book,” Wayne looks at the owl while he talks. “Paul said it made him nervous to go out at night.”

Eddie laughs. “He was convinced we’d get attacked.”

Steve can’t blame him. The longer he looks at the owl’s impossibly large eyes and spread wings, the more he believes he’s being hunted.

“Ready to head back?” Wayne asks after another minute, drawing his attention away.

“Wish I had a camera like Byers. Probably could get a good picture.” Eddie says as he starts to walk back the way they came.

Steve takes note to ask Jonathan about his so he can get him one for Christmas.

When they make it back to the cabin, Wayne excuses himself to take a shower and do a crossword before bed, which leaves Steve and Eddie to fill their time however they want. Steve thinks back to Wayne’s suggestion about going for a swim, but he’s not sure Eddie would want to now that the sun’s almost set.

He’s not even sure he wants to get into the lake after dark.

But it does sound appealing, especially with the layer of damp sweat coating his skin from their walk. And there is a light on the dock that would make it easier to at least see each other.

“Wanna go for a swim?” Steve asks Eddie as he sips on a soda.

“Now?” Eddie looks out the window in the kitchen, frowning at the darkness looming.

“Now.”

“It’s dark.”

“We can turn on the light at the dock. C’mon. Just a quick dip,” Steve nudges his shoulder as he starts walking to the back door, fully dressed.

“You’re not gonna change?” Eddie asks in disbelief.

“Don’t plan on wearing my clothes in.” Steve winks as he leaves, knowing Eddie will follow him even if he’s hesitant to do so.

Within seconds, the back door is closing and Eddie is on his heels.

“Are we seriously skinny dipping in the lake while my uncle is here?” Eddie hisses out, hand covering Steve’s forearm.

“I’m skinny dipping. You can do whatever you want,” Steve responds. “But I wouldn’t complain if you joined me.”

Eddie huffs beside him, but still follows him the rest of the way to the water’s edge. The light has a covered power switch to their right, but now that they’re in an open area by the water, they realize the moon is pretty bright.

Steve starts stripping off his shirt, then his shoes and socks. Eddie watches, probably trying to decide if he’s gonna join him or go back inside and pretend Steve isn’t naked in the water. When Steve pulls his pants off, Eddie sighs and starts untying his boots.

“Can’t believe you have me getting into another lake. Wasn’t the first time enough?” Eddie’s grumbling loud enough for Steve to hear, but quiet enough that Steve only catches every couple of words and has to use context clues for the rest. He can’t hold back a smile when he shoves his underwear down and leaves them on top of his pile of clothes.

Eddie is still grumbling as he removes his own clothes, enough that he’s distracting himself from realizing Steve’s already naked and waiting for him.

When he looks up, his eyes widen and his jaw drops open.

“You’re gonna catch flies like that,” Steve steps closer as he speaks, feeling more nervous than he expected to. “Probably should get in so the mosquitos don’t get us.”

“Right.” Eddie shakes his head, closing his eyes so he can focus. “Yes. Let’s get in.”

Steve grabs his hand and walks them both to the water. The water is chilly, but not uncomfortably cold. He knows in the next few weeks, the temperature will drop enough at night to cause the lake to be freezing cold. But right now, it’s perfect.

Being here with Eddie is perfect.

Eddie breathes out slowly as they keep walking further in, squeezing Steve’s hand.

“All good?” Steve asks when they’re waist deep.

“Yep. All good. How uh…how far do you wanna go?” Eddie’s looking out at what little they can see of the lake, even with the moonlight glistening off the tiny waves of the lake.

“Just a little more.”

Steve doesn’t take Eddie’s trust for granted here, knows that he’s asking a lot of him.

When the water is just below his collarbone, he stops.

Eddie is tense next to him, but doesn’t seem to be panicking.

“Okay?” Steve asks.

Eddie looks around and then settles back on Steve. “I’m okay.”

Something about the way he says it makes Steve pause, though.

“You can let it out if you need to, baby,” he offers. He’s not sure what it is specifically that makes him think Eddie’s on the edge of tears, but he wants to give him the chance to cry. “I’m right here.”

Eddie doesn’t sob, or cry, or do anything for a minute. They’re both looking out at the dark lake and the moon above, listening to crickets and a gentle breeze in the leaves of the trees nearby. Eddie’s breathing just stops for a few seconds and that’s all the warning Steve gets before he’s sniffling and talking.

“My dad was a piece of shit,” he starts. Steve is gonna follow his lead, and listen, and let Eddie tell him whatever he wants to. Even if that’s all he says. “He hated me. Pretty sure he hated my mom towards the end of her life, too. Anything that put attention on someone other than him was no good. That’s why he got involved with the closest thing Hawkins had to a mafia.”

Steve rubs his thumb against the side of Eddie’s hand under the water, prompting him to continue.

“He ranked pretty high with them so he got plenty of attention. Forgot that he had a wife and a kid. When my mom died, he temporarily got more attention from everyone. Made sure he looked like the mourning husband trying to be strong for the son he barely knew. Even at four and five years old I knew he was full of shit. But at least he was taking me with him sometimes, showing me cool shit. He got arrested when I was seven for petty theft and possession of drugs. Got lucky that the judge believed his sob story of being the only one who could take care of me.” Eddie scoffed. “Paid a fine with money he stole and had to do 80 hours of community service that his boss signed off on after a few weeks. Didn’t care that the only meals I ate were at school and the neighbor’s house when she saw me alone for dinner. Didn’t care that I never had school supplies or clothes that fit. Didn’t care that I missed school anytime I missed the bus, which was often because he never gave me an alarm clock to set to get up in time.”

Steve wants to cry, hearing how shitty Eddie’s childhood was, but he refuses to right now. He doesn’t want Eddie to stop talking.

“When I was nine, he taught me how to steal a car. I could barely see over the steering wheel, but it was the first time I made him proud.” Eddie clears his throat. “He got sent to prison when I was 11. I got put in the system because everything is a mess and Wayne wasn’t even listed as my uncle anywhere. Wayne heard about it all a few weeks later and didn’t stop pushing to have me in his care until they gave in. I’m surprised they put up so much of a fight considering they don’t usually care that much about poor kids with shit parents. Wayne fought for me and I didn’t even know how much he did until I was older.”

Steve glances over to see tears falling down Eddie’s face. He let go of Eddie’s hand to wrap his arm around his waist instead, pulling him against his side.

“He didn’t have to do that. He just knew what a piece of shit my dad was and apparently checked on me a few times a year without me or him knowing. And he told you about Paul.” Steve nods. “Paul was in and out a lot at first, made me suspicious. Thought he was up to no good and just using Wayne as a place to sleep when he wasn’t in the truck. But then he took me with him a few times over the summer and we got closer. I don’t think Wayne even knows how much that man loved him. He was gonna start working more local jobs sooner until I came into the picture and Wayne was struggling to keep up with bills. Long haul makes more money, so he stayed out. Made sure I had clothes and school supplies, made sure I ate three meals a day and had whatever snacks I wanted. Sent payments to the electric company before Wayne even got the bill so I never had to worry about sleeping through alarms or not being able to take a hot shower.”

Steve didn’t realize he was crying until Eddie reached his thumb up to wipe away a tear.

“He was my father in the ways that mattered to me, just like Wayne has been. Losing him was more painful than anything I feel about my dad dying now. All I feel now is guilt that I feel anything at all.”

Steve uses the arm wrapped around Eddie’s waist and the weightlessness the water allows to lift him up and guide his legs around his waist. He’s looking up at the man he loves, holding the back of his thighs, and wishing he could take every shitty feeling away with his words of comfort.

“You can feel however you feel. I’ll love you through it all,” Steve reassures him. Eddie’s breath catches at his words, and Steve knows he chose the right thing to say at the right time. “No one who cares about you is gonna judge you for having any emotion about your dad dying. If you wanted to stand in the middle of a table in the cafeteria at the school and cheer, I’d sit at the table and cheer you on. If you want to show up at his grave and scream and cry, I’ll hold your hand the whole time. So will Wayne. And so would Paul.”

Eddie sobs as he wraps his arms around Steve’s neck and hides his face against Steve’s neck. Steve can feel the wetness of his tears, can feel his own still falling into the water below. He doesn’t care how long they stay like that, doesn’t even care if this is all they do all night.

But only a few minutes later, Eddie is pulling back and looking down at Steve, hands playing with the wet ends of his hair.

“I didn’t expect any of this this weekend,” he admits. “I should learn to stop having expectations.”

Steve’s lips turn up in a half-smile as Eddie rests his forehead against his. “Better or worse than what you expected?”

Eddie snorts. “Better. Always better with you.”

Steve’s glad it’s dark enough to hide his blush, but he’s sure Eddie knows what he does to him by now. If he doesn’t, he will soon enough.

Eddie traces a line along Steve’s neck, gently poking at his moles as he watches his own movements. Steve holds him, lets him do what he wants, feels every touch like lightning.

“I love you,” he finally says, barely more than a whisper, like he’s unsure it’s okay, even after Steve’s confession. “I think I have for a while.”

Steve wants to kiss him, but this moment still feels like a part of Eddie’s monologue. He wants Eddie to lead now, to show him how to love him. Whatever he needs, Steve will give it willingly and gladly.

“How long until Wayne comes to make sure we didn’t drown?” Eddie asks.

“Probably not unless we’re still gone by morning.”

“As lovely as being in your arms all night sounds, I don’t know if I’d wanna stay in the water that long,” Eddie laughs as his legs tighten around Steve’s waist. Their mostly soft cocks brush against each other, making them both inhale loudly. “A little longer might not be so bad, though.”

Steve’s finding it harder not to kiss him, not to let his hands wander from Eddie’s thighs, up to his waist, back to his ass. He resists, but Eddie shifts his weight again and everything gets harder.

“You’re killing me.” Steve groans, letting his head fall back so he can look up at the stars in the sky instead of the ones in Eddie’s eyes.

“Look at me.” Eddie’s tone’s shifted to something serious, still adorned with an affection Steve can’t believe he gets to hear. Steve looks at him with his lips parted and unblinking eyes. “I wanna be yours. Will you let me?”

Steve nods. That’s all he can do.

Eddie’s lips are against his, gently coaxing them apart further so he can slip his tongue inside. Steve’s not even thinking about how he hasn’t brushed his teeth or eaten a mint since supper, the warmth of Eddie’s hands circling behind his back and rubbing his shoulders enough of a distraction even without his tongue gliding against the roof of his mouth.

Eddie’s hands are slow, but on a very clear path downwards as his tongue traces Steve’s bottom lip. Steve lets his own hands slip to Eddie’s lower back, lets a finger trace up and back down his spine.

Eddie shivers in his arms.

“Cold?” Steve whispers.

Eddie shakes his head. “Feels good.”

So Steve does it again, with more pressure, hoping Eddie gets the hint.

When Eddie’s hips grind forward, he knows he did.

They’re both nearly fully hard now, lips meeting again, hungrier and biting. Their moans vibrate between their chests, every movement rippling the water around them.

Eddie’s rocking his hips back and forth, friction against their cocks not quite enough to do more than get them more worked up.

The water doesn’t feel cool anymore, Steve’s body already adjusted to the temperature the moment Eddie’s hands were on him.

“Can I touch you?” Eddie asks, bringing Steve out of his thoughts about doing this in his pool when they got home. His hand is flat against Steve’s stomach, fingertips dragging through his happy trail.

“Want you to feel good too, love,” Steve trails one of his hands to Eddie’s front, stopping for a moment on the angry scars covering his side. “Together?”

Eddie slides impossibly closer, wrapping his hand around both of their cocks at once. Steve’s legs would’ve buckled without the help of the lake holding him up.

“Together is good,” Eddie smirks as his hand works them both over, squeezing at the tip the way Steve likes.

Steve had every intention of helping, but he’s doing all he can to keep his feet on the sandy ground and Eddie’s legs wrapped around his waist. He whimpers as Eddie leans in to kiss him slowly, a contradiction to his hand speeding up around them.

“Eddie, I’m…close.” Steve pants against his lips when he pulls back for air. His toes are curling in the sand below, and the small waves around them are splashing against their necks as Eddie’s hand moves faster. Steve’s bucking up into his touch, doesn’t care how desperate he seems.

“Me too, Stevie.” Eddie reassures him, just as breathless as Steve is.

Despite the words spoken and the increasing heat coiling in his belly, Steve gasps in surprise when he comes. He’s even more surprised when Eddie is right behind him, whispering Steve’s name repeatedly as his grip around them tightens then loosens.

Chests heaving, legs shaking, they stare at each other in the glow of the moonlight.

“I normally last a lot longer,” Steve breaks the silence.

Eddie breaks into loud laughter, head falling onto Steve’s shoulder before he realizes that the water is too high to do that without getting wet. He drops his legs and stands, keeping his arms wrapped around Steve’s waist for stability.

“New record for me, too, baby.”

“Next time, we’ll take our time.” Steve promises not only Eddie, but himself. He knows he has better self control than what Eddie just witnessed.

“You wanna head inside and take our time there?” Eddie’s smirking at him, fingers playfully teasing his sides under the water.

“Not sure I can be quiet enough.”

“Even if you bite a pillow?” Eddie pouts.

“I can be pretty loud,” Steve laughs, poking his bottom lip back to normal. “Plus, I’d like to be in one of our own beds when we ma- have sex.”

“Oh my god. Were you gonna say make love?” Eddie is squeezing his arms around him, lifting Steve up so most of his chest is out of the water. Steve’s hands rest against his shoulders, fingertips pruned from being in the water for a while.

“Maybe I was.” Steve knows he’s a sap. He doesn’t care if Eddie thinks it’s silly or stupid, but he does wanna avoid blowing this before it even has a chance to begin.

Eddie must see something in his eyes to keep him from pushing it more. He lets him back down slowly, soft smile on his face.

“I love that you care that much.” Eddie kisses the corner of Steve’s mouth. “I promise we’ll hold off on making love until we’re back home.”

Steve smiles shyly back at him.

“But I wouldn’t be opposed to getting my mouth on you after we shower.”

Steve smacks Eddie’s arm and rolls his eyes.

“You’re ridiculous. I love you.”

“You really do, don’t you?” Eddie sounds awestruck, like it’s suddenly hit him that this is happening, that Steve feels this much for him.

“I really do.”

🎸🎸🎸🎸🎸🎸🎸

Waking up in Steve’s arms for the second morning in a row felt too good to be true.

Most of this trip had felt too good to be true. Last night definitely felt like a dream.

He lets his eyes track over Steve’s bare chest, his neck, his lips pouting out as he sleeps. His eyelids are fluttering, but he’s still asleep, probably coming out of a dream.

Eddie’s fingers trace what’s left of the scar around his neck, touch light enough that Steve wouldn’t feel it in his sleep. He thinks about Steve’s bravery, how he dived head first into everything, be it protecting people from monsters or falling in love. Eddie knows Steve went without medical care after most run-ins in the Upside Down, and had only gotten some last time when Wayne insisted he do so while Eddie was in surgery.

The neck scars faded after they were patched up by a nurse, but many of his other wounds were deeper and infected, leaving a permanent reminder on his back and sides much like Eddie’s.

He traced along the outer lines of one of the scars shaped like a heart on his chest. Steve insisted it was just a weird oval, but Eddie insisted that it was a heart over his heart.

His chest hair has grown back in around it, nearly covering it up if you didn’t look close enough.

Eddie is close enough now.

It’s definitely a heart.

“Not sure how I feel about you staring at my chest that close,” Steve’s raspy voice fills his ear and he looks up to see Steve’s sleepy eyes looking at him. “Max at least had the decency to look from a distance.”

“Ha.” Eddie fake laughs. “I was just admiring your bountiful chest hair and the heart you wear on your sleeve.”

“It’s not a heart,” Steve groans as he covers Eddie’s head with his arms, pulling him on top of him. “You’re just blinded by love.”

“Who knew I’d be the optimist in this relationship?” Eddie breathes against Steve’s lips.

“Probably everyone who’s ever seen me in a relationship.” Steve kisses him quick, just a peck. “Let me up.”

“You’re the one who put me here.” Eddie doesn’t move. “Take me with you if you need to go so badly.”

“Eds, c’mon. I gotta brush my teeth.”

“So do I.”

Steve sighs. Eddie smiles.

“Fine.”

As Steve stands from the bed, Eddie wraps his legs around his waist, a mirror image to their time in the lake. Eddie’s not actually expecting Steve to carry him more than a few steps, but he blushes when he makes it all the way to the bedroom door.

“Still wanna come with me?” Steve raises his eyebrows like he knows Eddie didn’t expect him to take it this far.

“Can you seriously carry me down the hall?”

Steve stares blankly back at him. “I carried you for almost a mile when we got out of the Upside Down.”

“Touché.”

Steve manages to open the door with one hand before it goes back to Eddie’s leg, hoisting him up further so he has a better grip. Eddie just stares down at Steve’s face in amazement.

“Hey Wayne,” Steve says as they pass Wayne’s room. “Sleep okay?”

“Uh huh. There a reason you’re carrying the prince?” Wayne asks, causing Eddie to turn his head and scowl. “Wake up grumpy?”

“Woke up lazy.” Steve responded as he continued on the journey to the bathroom.

Once there, Steve set Eddie down on the floor and handed him his toothbrush. They brush their teeth together, smiling when they catch each other's eye in the mirror.

“Will you kiss me for real now?” Eddie asks after they’ve finished.

“Are you gonna walk to the kitchen by yourself or will I have to carry you?” Steve retorts.

“Your kiss will give me the power to make it.”

Steve snorts a laugh and leans in, his palm resting against Eddie’s jaw to pull him the last inch or so. The kiss is nothing like their back and forth. Steve consumes him, and Eddie lets him.

He doesn’t know how long they stand there, but he thinks it must be longer than they should.

Wayne clears his throat from the doorway. “Didn’t realize this was a part of brushin’ teeth these days.”

Eddie leaps away from Steve, panicked at the thought of Wayne knowing suddenly. He’s been out to Wayne for so long, he forgets that others probably aren’t comfortable being so open. Steve especially, who’s mentioned before that he wasn’t sure if he wanted to come out to everyone until he was sure they’d be okay with it.

“Relax, Ed. I clocked Steve months ago.” Wayne pushes past them to grab his toothbrush and toothpaste. “Move your relations outta here.”

“Relations?” Eddie gags. “Way to ruin the moment.”

“Sorry to ruin your delicate sensibilities. Get out.”

Steve pushes Eddie out of the small bathroom before he can respond. Eddie decides to focus on Steve’s hands on him instead of arguing further.

“Should we make breakfast?” Steve asks as they walk back to the bedroom to get dressed.

“I shouldn’t ever touch an oven, but I’ll watch you lovingly while you make breakfast, darling,” Eddie bats his eyelashes at Steve, who throws his shirt at him. “That’s not very nice. Did I not, and I quote, suck the soul-“

Steve’s hand covers his mouth while he sputters to cover Eddie’s voice from traveling out of the room.

“Jesus, the mouth on you.”

“That’s what you said last night.” Eddie’s words are muffled under Steve’s hand, but they both laugh. “I can make toast.”

“I’ll make the rest.”

Eddie spends the morning touching Steve as much as possible.

He spends the afternoon sneaking kisses and holding him in the hammock set up on the porch thanks to Wayne’s creativity.

He spends the evening watching Wayne and Steve fish while he drinks a beer and hands them whatever they need.

This is a peace that may only last until they leave tomorrow, but something tells him that this is only the beginning of a future Eddie never could’ve pictured for himself.

🎣🎣🎣🎣🎣🎣

five years later

Wayne slams the truck door a bit harder than he means to. The rain just started coming down harder and he wanted to get his bag in the cabin before it got worse.

When he enters the front door, the scent of freshly baked cookies wafts through the air and he smiles.

“Made it, boys!” He yells, though he’s pretty sure speaking at a normal volume would’ve been enough. The cabin hasn’t changed much, but Steve insisted on opening up the front portion so it felt more welcoming.

“Wayne!” Steve exclaims as he pops up from behind the counter of the kitchen. “You just missed Eddie. He went out to the trail.”

Wayne gives Steve a tight hug. At Steve’s frown, he laughs. “Sorry ‘bout the wet clothes. Started raining the last couple miles in and got heavier just as I was leavin’ the truck.”

“Oh no.” Steve groaned.

Just as he spoke, the back door slammed open and Eddie dropped his camera bag on the floor.

Wayne and Steve both took in the sight of him, drenched from head to toe, dripping onto the tile floor, and laughed.

“I hate the outdoors.”

“You’re a nature photographer. You hate the rain.” Steve walks over to him, still laughing under his breath. He picks up the bag before leaning in to kiss his cheek.

Wayne watches the exchange, fighting tears back at the reason he was invited to their cabin this weekend.

Eddie was proposing to Steve and wanted Wayne to be there to capture it with his camera. He didn’t care that Wayne was an old man who could barely operate a camera, he just wanted someone to do it.

He knew Eddie was also a little nervous and having Wayne there would help keep him calm.

Why he was nervous, Wayne didn’t know.

They couldn’t legally get married, but they might as well be anyway.

“Wayne!” Eddie bounces over to him and throws his arms around him, forgetting for a moment that he’s soaked. “You’re here!”

“I’m here. I’d like to be less wet, though.”

Eddie backs up and Wayne pats his shoulder.

“Both of you should go get changed. Dinner’s ready in ten minutes.” Steve interrupts on his way to put Eddie’s camera bag in their room.

“Yes, dear,” Eddie replies. Steve turns and glares for a moment before continuing on his way. Once he’s out of sight, Eddie sighs. “God, I love that man.”

“That’s why I’m here, ain’t it?” Wayne playfully shoves at Eddie’s arm. “We better listen to him. I’m starvin’ and I think he’d make us fend for ourselves if we show up at the table dripping wet.”

As Wayne changes, he can hear Steve laughing in their room, Eddie talking about something he saw outside in the usual dramatic way he spoke. He thinks back to the first time he brought his boys here together, how hushed they tried to be, how hesitant.

He looked over at a photo Eddie framed for this room so Wayne had something when he came to stay.

Paul was smiling at the camera, arm wrapped around Eddie’s shoulders, Wayne looking at both of them with a smile. He remembers laughing right after the picture was taken, and giving in and buying them both cotton candy. They insisted it wouldn’t make them sick, then proceeded to both rush to the nearest garbage can after they got off the Gravitron at the fair.

“Wayne! Steve’s bullying me!” Eddie yells.

“You probably deserve it!” He yells back.

“Unbelievable!” Eddie screams.

“Ha!” Steve yells.

Wayne shakes his head as he makes his way out to the chaos he chose to be a part of this weekend.

[jackklinemybeloved]

just saw the new stranger things trailer and ough… if i have to watch any of the hawkins teens die im gonna lose it…

[kingofjohto]

Pairing: mostly platonic friendship moment between the reader and Eddie, Robin, and Steve but the main romantic part is Will Byers X M!reader

Word Count: 1.4K

Summary: You confide in your friend Eddie Munson about your feelings towards Will Byers, and he enlists the help of his friends Steve Harrington and Robin Buckley and they help you ask Will out.

A/N: this takes place after season 4 but hypothetically speaking everyone survives and Jopper is real because I said so! Also I’m too lazy to fix the spacing rn sorry ❤️❤️

So It’s A Date?

As the Campaign had just ended, and everyone was starting to leave, you felt that same feeling gnawing at the back of your mind.

“See ya Eddie, see ya Y/n” your friend Dustin called out as he and Mike Wheeler walked out of the basement.

You were getting your things together, but you couldn’t hide your true emotions from your best friend Eddie Munson.

“Is something wrong young one?” He asked in his usual goofy tone.

You let out a sigh, and then a groan.

“I need help Eddie!” You said dropping your bag and dropping yourself back onto the table.

“Woah, what’s going on with you?” He said, a bit surprised at your over the top response.

“Well, we’ve been friends for a while now, haven’t we?” You say, trying to ease into the topic.

“Woah, Y/n you didn’t kill anyone did you?” Eddie joked.

You tried to force out a laugh but all that came out was a little exhale with an awkward smile.

“Oh this must be serious, you usually love my lighthearted murder jokes.” Eddie said with a slight frown.

“It’s just… well… ya know. I’m not exactly… normal. Like most guys… I don’t really..” you murmured.

“Alright let’s not dance around it. You’re saying you’re into guys? While I’m flattered, I think you’re a bit too young for m-“

You quickly silenced him.

“No Eddie, I'm not into you!” You laughed.

“Well? Who is it? Is it Henderson? Or maybe Wheeler? It couldn’t be that no show Sinclair, or is it?” Eddie asked.

You shot him a look that he could only describe as repulsed.

“Of course not. All 4 of you are like the brothers that I never really wanted.” You said jokingly.

“Soo… then it must be… well it can only be Byers.” He said

You froze up for a moment, but sighed as you sank your head into your hand.

“Yup. Right in the money.” You sighed.

“What do you need help with there?” Eddie asked.

“It’s just… I really like him. I always have. I just don’t know what to do. I can't really tell if he even likes guys, but if he did I’m sure he’d like Mike more than me.” You said as you sank further into yourself.

“I wouldn’t be so sure of that my friend. I’ve seen the way he looks at you.” Eddie said encouragingly.

“But have you seen the way he looks at Mike!” You groaned.

Eddie paused for a moment, before you felt him shake your shoulder with a firm grip.

“Listen my friend, I’ve seen the way he looks at Mike. And I’ve seen the way he looks at you. When he looks at Mike, I see an abandoned puppy looking at an owner who couldn’t care less about it. However, when he looks at you?! It’s completely different. Instead of a feeling of fear I get hope. You should go for it kid.” He affirmed.

“How?” You asked.

“Well, Y/n, you know I’m not really that good with romance. However, I do know a certain someone who’s really good at that kind of thing.” He said.

You both quickly packed up your things and both got into Eddie’s car and drove off. You soon pulled up to the local Family Video.

“What are we doing here?” You asked as he pulled up.

“Getting help from the two people who could probably help you more than I can.” He said.

As the two of you walked in, you noticed faces you hadn’t seen in a while.

“Oh! Munson and l/n, what are you two doing here?” Steve asked, seemingly happy to finally see some familiar faces.

“Whatever it is, make it quick, we get off in 5.” Robin added.

You quickly looked to Eddie who then looked to you.

“Do you want to say it or should I?” Eddie asked.

“I don’t think I can say it again.” You sighed.

“Alright then, I will.” Eddie said.

“4 minutes, hurry up with it.” Robin reminded.

“Alright so basically-“

“I have a crush on Will Byers and I need help asking him out.” You blurted out.

Everyone was a bit surprised, but Robin was the first to break the silence.

“Oh wow… that’s…” she muttered.

“A lot.” Steve finished.

“So can you help or not?” Eddie asked.

Steve and Robin looked at each other, then to the clock.

“We get off in 2 minutes.” Robin said.

“Get ready, I’m gonna give you the Harrington Special.” Steve said.

“So? How do I look?” You asked.

The three looked at you as Steve finished working with your hair.

“I gotta say Y/n… it’s definitely a look.” Eddie said.

“Yeah well… I’m sure it’ll work.” Steve said.

“If it does he’ll beat your 0-16 record.” Robin laughed.

“Alright, let’s go.” Eddie said.

“Go where?” You ask.

“Isn’t it obvious? We’re going to the Byers place.” Eddie said.

“Wha-?”

Before you could even say anything you were already pulling up on the Byers new household that they moved into.

“Eddie are you sure about this?” You asked as he pulled to a stop.

“Listen kid, you’ll do great.” Eddie said.

“But what if-“

Steve quickly poked his head out from the back seat.

“Remember l/n. No ‘what if’s.’ Just go for it.” Steve said.

“Don't steal advice that I’ve told you before Harrington.” Robin said from the back seat.

“Right. I’m going for it.” You said.

You quickly got out of the car and walked up to the door. You looked back at your three friends staring intently, they all gave you a thumbs up so you made your move. Your finger pressed lightly on the doorbell, and thankfully Will answered.

“Oh, hey Y/n! What’s up?” He asked.

“Well…” you froze up a bit, “there’s something I want to ask you.”

“Wait. Actually, can I ask you something first? I’ve… kinda been meaning to ask you.” Will said.

“Huh? Yeah of course.” You said.

“I um… I wanted to know if you wanted to go to the movies with me? I know you like Comedy, and the reviews for this movie called Crocodile Dundee seem really good.” Will said.

“Oh, I’d love to!” You said.

“Um… also, I was wondering if we could maybe consider it… well…” before Will could finish a voice called from the car.

“Did you ask him out yet?!” Eddie yelled.

You felt your face heat up and you became flustered. Will on the other hand, started laughing.

“What’s so funny?” You asked, feeling a bit defeated.

“I was wondering why you were dressed up like that.” Will said, “that and… well… I was kinda just asking Johnathan how I could ask you out.” He laughed.

You looked over and sure enough, both Johnathan, Eleven, Hopper and Joyce were pressed up against their front window.

“So, do you think you’d be free tomorrow?” He asked.

“Yeah, I am. Do you wanna maybe go to the arcade before?” You asked sheepishly.

“Yeah, I’d really like that.” He said.

“Well… looks like it’s a date.” You said.

“Yeah.” Will said.

You both looked at each other awkwardly. The moment you were both worrying about all day, all week even, just came to fruition so easily.

“I’ll see you tomorrow then.” You said, still not believing what just happened.

“Right, see you then. For our date.” Will said, also in disbelief.

You walked back to Eddie’s car and he walked back inside his house.

“So?” Eddie asked.

“We’ve got a date. Tomorrow.” You said.

“YES, see Robin, I told you I could still work magic.” Steve said.

“And yet you still have yet to pick up a single girl in the last two months.” Robin laughed.

Everyone in the car laughed as Eddie drove back to the Family Video to drop off Robin and Steve at their car. As Eddie pulled up to your house you just had to ask him something.

“Eddie, why did you yell that.” You asked.

He froze up for a moment.

“Well, there was a point in time when I had someone I cared about that much. I finally built up the courage to ask him out, but I backed out last minute. I’ve regretted it since.” Eddie said, a bit of sadness in his tone.

“Thank you for that. I mean it.” You said.

You got out of his car and waved as he pulled out. Now all you had to worry about was what you were going to wear tomorrow.

Part Two:

https://kingofjohto.tumblr.com/post/687096028474867712/so-its-a-date

[stripperblvd]

listen. *cries* he isn’t gone okay I’ve literally been feeling numb all day long because of it. he’s always with us in our hearts. he’ll live on in our memories.

an eddie x fem!reader she has undiscovered powers. But seeing her boyfriend getting attack by demobats. She unleashes her unknown power. killing them all she gets injured a bit by a few but nothing fatal. they both live…

*mumbles* Steve should’ve died instead of Eddie

Untapped (Eddie Munson x power!Reader)

Warnings: A little bit of angst and mentions of blood. Ya know, the usual. Word Count: 3.3k

Note: I’m not exactly sure if this counts as an AU but uh ya!

Most of the gang was sleeping, the ride back from the arms store silent, keeping the atmosphere serene and calm. You managed to have Eddie shrug off his jackets, letting him sleep on your chest as you sat on his lap. His legs were slightly spread, giving you room to lay your weight on the sofa itself so that his own limbs wouldn’t fall asleep, and his face shielded by your arms, your fingers twisting and playing with the tips of his pretty curls. You missed this, you missed the calm before everything had come back to you again. When El escaped, so did you, findinding refuge with Nancy when she found out about you two, after what had happened with Will, you decided to leave, knowing nothing good came from being surrounded by all the mistakes of Brenner’s. You twist your bracelets, some belonging to Eddie and some to you, revealing the 000 tattoo that had been inked on your skin from an early age.

You heard the click of a button, and the soft sounds of Max’s music stopped, the redhead girl coming to sit beside you. “Can I ask you something?” she spoke quietly, not wanting to disturb all the sleeping heads around but attracting the attention of Erica who had no need for rest given her recent involvement. “Shoot Red.” you smile, looking at the two young girls. She hesitated before fully taking off her headphones, looking at you with intent, “I understand why El has her tattoo, but I kinda never understood why you have all zeroes. Why did you need to be tagged if you don’t have any powers?.” Erica looked nervously between Max and you, relaxing when she saw your soft grin. You look back down to your resting boyfriend, tightening your arms around him before you respond. “I wish I knew myself. When I was younger Brenner used me sorta as a training dummy for all the other kids, letting them experiment and push their limits with me. But as I grew up, he stopped. I can’t remember why. I just know the kids took it too far, knocking out all power for like a whole day from the amount of energy they were using on me.” You explained, trying your best to recollect your thoughts, knowing that your actual memory was spotty, up until maybe a few weeks before the break out.

“That's awful. Why would he do that?” Erica chimed in, furring her brows with discontentment, her usual sass nowhere to be found. You shook your head, brushing Eddie’s bangs and scalp with your fingers. “I’m not sure. From what I remember I never displayed abilities like the rest. There was virtually no reason for me to be in there for as long as I was, other than being El’s babysitter.” A bitter laugh escapes your lips, remembering the hatred you brewed for Brenner throughout those years, wishing you had even an ounce of power to erase him from the world, to punish him for everything he let those kids do to you. You take a deep breath, knowing it’s best not to get worked up about the past, choosing instead to run your thumb across Eddie’s brows, smiling as his face contorts slightly, his muscles registering your touch, but not stirring him from the peaceful slumber he was in.

“You really do love him huh?” Max says, so low and gentle that you barely catch the airy whisper, the mere words making your grin bigger as you look at the other girl. Your head nods a bit, “ I know your brother wasn’t always the best, he didn’t know how to release his emotions but apart from him, Eddie was always there for me. And when Billy passed it was Eddie comforting me, making sure I wouldn’t run off doing something stupid. ‘Course this was before he got involved in all of this shit.” the last part of your sentence hinting at a spiteful of words as you turn your gaze back on to the girls. “I know he sometimes comes off a bit dramatic and over the top, radical and what not. But if we make it out of this shit hole, I would love for you guys to get to know him better. He’s really a big teddy bear, I guess that’s why I fell in love with him. Despite all the nicknames he always remained himself, not changing for anyone.” Both girls smile, letting themselves be sucked into your loving words towards the young man in your arms, admiring the way you profess your adoration for him so freely, so deeply. You don’t notice in the moment, but the trailer is no longer silent because of sleeping figures resting against walls and furniture. Instead a comfortable silence falls Steve and the rest of the gang staring at the two lovers in the back of the vehicle, too entranced in each other to even fathom what’s to come.

-

Bidding Nancy Steve and Robin good luck, you watch their figures run off, heading to the Creel house to bait Vecna. Your entire body is shaking, your nostrils registering the putrid smell that holds power over this reverse Hawkins, the cold silence engulfing everything but stricken out by red bolts of energy, crashing in the far distance. Eddie comes over to you, grabbing hold of your hands and holding them right on his warm chest, letting you revel in his comfiness. “ Look at me.” He says softly, trying his best to distract you from your troubled gaze. You lock eyes with him, losing yourself in those beautiful puppy dog eyes, the same eyes that just a few days ago were being used against you in order to get you to come with him on a midnight shake run. “ Tell me, what song do you think Chrissy would like to be avenged to?” he asks, smiling at you as you roll your eyes and smirk, knowing full and well that the little blonde cheerleader would’ve never listened to anything you two blast on the radio and players. “Oh my, I'm not sure. But she seemed like a trendy and up to date gal. You finished learning Master of Puppets?” you grab a hold of his collar, a suppressed laugh making Eddie’s eyes squint so tightly that a small tear is squeezed through. He grabs a hold of your head, kissing your forehead, your cheeks, your nose and finally pressing a warm kiss to your lips. “I love the way you think, you really are Munson’s girl.” he smiles.

-

Your small victory is short- lived, Dustin Eddie and you screaming and poking your spears into the small vent opening your heart racing at the mere thought that the bats could not only get into the trailer, but also fly into the real Hawkins and raise hell to unknown civilians. You watch as Eddie pushes the spikes of his makeshift shield into the roof to cover the vent, quickly making work of getting Dustin back to the safe Hawkins. Eddie pushes you into the opening, watching relieved as you land on your back quickly scurrying off so that your boyfriend can safely fall back in. But he never makes it through, your heart breaking and shattering as you watch him cut the makeshift rope, looking up towards where you are. “I love you so much baby. I know I ran a lot, but I promised to always protect you, you aren’t dating a coward. I promise.”

You never knew how badly such loving words could ever hurt, a gutting yell leaving your lips as you watch the love of your entire soul run off, his heart full of desire to show you that you weren’t dating a coward as he had said. “EDDIE” your sobs barely reach his ear as he smashed through the exit, attracting the attention of Vecna’s entire bat swarm, their screeching replacing your weeping voice. No, he wasn’t a coward, he wanted to be more for you, not be scared any more, he wanted to face his torments, head on and scream a big “fuck you” in its face. He wanted to prove all of Hawkins wrong, he was more than “just a freak”, and you deserved to have a brave man to remember, rather than running, easily scared one.

“Y/N please, please please listen to me you can’t go back, you can't damnit why won't you listen!” Dustin is crying right beside you, shaking from what he’s witnessing, your heart breaking even further. This boy, who had just barely entered his teenage years, didn't deserve this. He needed to be at home, safe, warm, his biggest worry being the classes he would have next time he arrived at school. It wasn’t fair, not to him and not to any of the other kids who had been sucked into this supernatural mess, yet another repercussion of Brenner’s actions. “Shh, shh listen to me Dusty, listen. I need to go back, I need to help him, but I can't do it without you. I need you to stay here, make another rope okay? Go to the closet that's next to the kitchen right there, there’s some spare blankets and covers, tie them up and get that shit ready for when we come back yeah?” You pressed your forehead to Dustin’s, only letting go when you felt his quivering nod, a small sob escaping his swollen lips. You take him into your arms tightly, giving him one last sense of comfort before setting up a nearby chair, running towards it and stepping on it fully to latch your arms against the coiling tentacles of the opening, the freshman below you watching as you grunt swinging your body so that you’ll fall back into the Upside Down.

A yelp and a groan leave your throat, wind slightly wonky as you land on your back rolling over to crawl your way back up to a vertical stance. “Go!” you yell upwards, ushering Dustin to follow your instructions, preparing a second way back into safety. You stumble onto your feet, breath still slightly uneven as you grab your own spear and charge outside, catching a small glimpse of the swarm of bats, heart clenching knowing exactly who they’re aiming for. The second you burst through the gate your stomach sinks, watching your boyfriend fall on the ground. The swarm of wild bats started to close in on him.

“Eddie!” you yell, running as fast you possibly can, knowing in your head that time is precious, the beasts very likely to attack Eddie at any moment, sucking his life force away. For a split second you lock eyes with your lover, tears streaming down his face as he watches large hunks of bats break off from the tornado like cloud above him, heading straight for you, your steps only serving to meet them halfway. Adrenaline is pumping in your veins, drowning out all sounds including the pleads of your desperate partner, urging the flying fiends to focus back on him, to give you a single chance at surviving what was headed your way. But all he can see is you crying out, slashing the spear in your hands wildly, at first managing to kill several of the bats around you by slicing them into halves, but you quickly swarmed yourself, the bats’ speed so ferocious that you start to feel the air around you quickly thin out, Barely able to inhale anything at all as the bats close in on you, not giving up their relentless attack on your lungs. Between flaps of dark wings you catch small flashes of your boyfriend, watching as a bat flies dangerously close to his neck, knicking his jaw and drawing out a small slash of bloody red. At this point you can barely breathe, the bats flying faster, tighter, closer, seemingly aware of what they're doing to you. The only sounds you can hear is your own dry throat, choking, gasping, clinging to any little bit of oxygen that it can push into your lungs. Your vision is becoming blurry, eyes filling up with desperate tears as you watch Eddie cry out in pain, the bats around him now taking this opportunity to slash at him with their choppy fangs, his shirt tattered and beginning to change from a dirty dim white to a splotchy red. You’re crying, choking, no longer holding any hope that either of you would make it, both of you to be found lying lifeless on the cold ground of this cursed place.

A shining light flashes in your vision, disrupting the once dark atmosphere you found yourself in. “Again.” you recognize the voice, it belonging to the man you once used to call Papa. Another flash. “Again!” you feel the pain spreading through your muscles. Random faces start to appear, sunken little faces, without any single strands of hair on their head. “AGAIN” you cry out, so many feelings, memories, flooding back into your body, invading your senses as you begin to burn. “AGAIN!!” The voices are louder, his screams sounding more like whips and slashes, your ears plagued with an array of auditory memories, the sounds of a buzzing at your arm constant through the flashbacks. You open your eyes, which are now irritated and burning, the world slowing down as you map out a handful of bats, their trajectories seemingly aligning with Eddie’s scratched chest. The burning in your body intensifies, a new sound replacing the buzz in your ears, this time a deep rhythmic beat starts playing, a sound you can only credit to your beating heart, the speed of its beats nowhere near healthy. Everything burns, the itching sensation blooming straight from your chest, the bats flapping directly at your boyfriend’s chest now. “I SAID AGAIN.” Brenner’s voice cracks through you like the red bolts of lighting in the sky, your body being swept into the toxic air, hanging.

Eddie can barely register what’s happening, a sizzle reaching his ears as he opens his tightly shut eyes, the impact of those sharp teeth tearing at his skin never arriving. Instead he covers his ears, a new screech replacing every other noise, his eyes not believing the scene before him as he looks out to what is beating against his ear drums. Suspended in mid air is the love of his life, skin glowing with a white-bluish tint that circles around her entire frame like an aura. Thin root-like glows appear all over your body, spreading from your heart out wrapping around your arms like weeds and shooting straight out in a blanket of light. Your nose, eyes and ears leaking with a crimson fluid as your body finally gives out, falling to the ground as his ears catch the small crackle of steps behind him. Behind him are Nancy Steve and Robin, arms held up at their faces as they lock eyes with Eddie, stunned expressions visible all over.

“Eddie…what the hell was that?” an utterly awestruck Steve advances towards him, scanning his body for any serious injuries. Eddie can’t reply, simply scattering on to his feet, kicking up dirt as he stumbles his way over to you. He ignores all the soreness and pain from his body, picking your trembling body up. It’s impossible for his heart not to break, as you hang almost lifelessly, mumbling incoherent words. “Fuck baby, its okay sweetheart we’re gonna get you some help yeah? COME ON MY GIRLFRIEND NEEDS HELP!” Eddie yells at the trio that’s still stuck in their places, his tone urging them to run along with him back to the trailer, time of essence in case you were in danger.

-

You groan softly, not being able to move your body as the smell of some sort of breakfast meat hits your senses. As you open your eyes, adjusting to the rays of light your vision starts to focus. You’re in a dingy little cabin, your vision cut off by a cream colored curtain, sloppily closed. Through the opening Eddie, Steve, Dustin and Nancy emerge, your beloved boy rushing to your side, cooing at you. “Hey hey hey, careful sweet cheeks, you’re fragile right now.” he soothes your ache by placing himself right at your side, allowing you to rest on him. As a large hand opens the curtain fully, you see just how many people are in the Cabin, The Byers Family, a very hippie looking dude standing right next to Jonathan, the Sinclair siblings, the two oldest Wheeler Siblings, Robin, Max, Eleven and to your great surprise, Hopper, alive and well.

‘What the hell happened” your voice is slightly raspy, Mike hands Nancy a glass of water, which she then passes along to Eddie who then brings it up to your mouth as you’re filled in, from the reappearance of Hopper, the very long road trip from California back to Hawkins, Eleven’s whereabouts and of course, the events that happened in the upside down. It takes a second for you to fully process everything, eyes locking with El’s as she comes to kneel right before you, taking your hands in hers. She looks tired, stressed, your eyes taking note of her once more shaven head, an anger building inside of you knowing Brenner was still alive during these years, causing just as much trouble as before.

“You have powers.” She said, catching your full attention. All eyes are on you. “But how, El you saw it yourself, Papa tried everything in the book.” you stare at your hands, starting to shake lightly but calming down the second you feel a pair of long, beautiful arms wrap around you, the scent of musky wood, cigarettes and cheap cologne soothing your broken mind. Eleven smiles shaking her head. “I remember now, Papa… he did not use you. He used us. He wanted to see how powerful you were. But you were scared of Papa, the only time he saw your powers was when you collapsed the power grid. Papa forced me to remember, it was not us, it was only you, that's why he stopped. He was not strong enough to control your power. Only you are.” El’s soft voice spoke clearly, frowning and turning to the rest of the group as your cheeks get’s coated with a single tear, your eyes distant.

“I-I remember.” you whispered, broken. You sob into Eddie’s arms as your mind fully puts together the picture. Brenner tortured you to see what he could milk from you, his own cowardice the reason you felt weak and helpless all this time. Eddie grabs a hold of your chin, making you look at him. “Hey hey hey, look at me. You’re okay baby, you’re okay. You’re more than okay, you're a freaking badass. You saved me, and you saved the others too, you alone did that baby girl, you saved me, kicked those bats into the afterlife and helped save the world. Baby you’re a hero.” he pressed his lips against your forehead, rubbing soothing circles on your back.

“It’s true.” Max chimes in, stepping towards you. “Y/N you saved my life too, Along with El, you guy’s saved me from so much. I was pretty much a goner, I didn’t stand a chance but you killing his hell pets hurt Henry enough for El to finally get him off me” Max smiled, taking El’s hand as they nod. Your own face sporting a small smile of its own realizing this whole encounter wasn't as bad as it could’ve been. “Listen, we can talk about this all we want later, let the kid rest for now.” Hopper called out, ushering everyone away and into the front of the cabin for some breakfast, small bye’s and rest up’s from the mini crowd was sent to you as they all left, a comfortable silence wrapping you and Eddie up.

“Everything’s gonna change now.” you speak up, snuggling right into Eddie’s chest, inhaling his addicting scent, basking in his warmth. “That's fine, my baby’s a freaking superhero, I don’t mind that kind of change.” he laughs, making sure to squeeze you just a little, burying his face in in your hair before whispering, a smirk forming on those beautiful lips “You know this is gonna give you major boosts in Dnd right?”

Fuckkkk yess, Eddie Munson deserves a super cool lightning inducing girlfriend, honestly one of the coolest plots I’ve done. Peace out

7-3-22

[captain-tch]

Ride or Die (Eddie Munson x GN!PlatonicReader)

Your friendship ended months ago to protect him, yet somehow he ended up knowing about the Upside Down. Can you salvage what you've lost? TW: mentions of blood, loss and death.

It was never supposed to be this way. Eddie was supposed to be graduating this year, pouring all of his efforts into walking across that stage and taking that diploma, flipping the bird at everyone who never believed in him. He was never supposed to see someone murdered brutally in front of his eyes, be labelled a killer and have to hide for fear of being locked away for something he didn’t do. He certainly wasn’t meant to be dragged into the mess I’ve been involved with since it all began, was never meant to know of the parallel world that threatened our own. 

I had tried so hard to keep this from him, and now, he was subject to the horrors. Everything I had done to protect him was for nothing. All of the lies had put a strain on our friendship, and I wouldn’t have been able to recall the last time we talked. I missed him, I missed his calm demeanour, the way he always brought a goofy smile to my face, the way I was undeniably me around him. I told myself that the price was worth it, that he’d never have to know the reason I couldn’t sleep through the night. 

But then Chrissy died. 

When I walked into that shed at Reefer Rick’s, I saw how his face dropped. I saw how his guard was up, and I saw how not a single trace of our friendship lingered behind that empty stare. 

I hated how Dustin was the one who calmed him down from his spiral. I envied him; I was able to do that up until a few months ago. After the events of StarCourt Mall it hit close to home how easily one of us could die. I didn’t want him to mourn for me, or worse, have to mourn him. So I pushed him away, until he didn’t fight back anymore. 

As Dustin told Eddie everything we’d been through, his eyes trained on me the entire time. I shuffled under his piercing gaze, gulping nervously. In all honesty, I wasn’t sure how he’d react. 

“You knew?” 

I couldn’t avoid his questioning gaze anymore, cracking under the pressure. “Ever since Will went missing.” 

“Is that why you blew me off?” 

“I -” Steve cut me off. 

“We have bigger fish to fry right now.”

“Steve’s right. Right now, we’re more concerned with keeping you safe.” 

“Wait, safe from what?” 

“Jason has gone ape shit thinking you’re a cult leader who killed Chrissy for a satanic ritual. He’s on the rampage.” Dustin sighed, pointing at me. “You keep an eye on him while we figure out what’s going on.” 

“What?” Eddie and I spoke in unison, sharing a questioning look before turning away. 

“Not to be rude, but why am I being dubbed the babysitter? That’s Steve’s job.” 

Steve snorted. “Not today it isn’t.”

“Just, please, do it for us?” Dustin pleaded. “We’ll be a few hours, tops.” 

“Unless you get caught by the cops for breaking and entering.” 

“You worry too much.” Dustin smiled, “Besides, seems like you two have a lot of catching up to do. See ya!” 

“Wait!” The door shut firmly behind the rest of the team, leaving just me and Eddie, alone. I sighed deeply, leaning my hand against the wall and falling until I hit the floor. I laid there for what felt like eternity, feeling Eddie’s gaze burn into the side of my head. 

I couldn’t take it anymore, I snapped. “What?” 

“Is hanging out with me really that much of a burden for you?” I could feel the venom in his voice; when I looked up, his face was crestfallen, his attention focused on his hands knotted in his lap. 

I sighed deeply, shaking my head. I rubbed the palm of my hand into my eyes. “No, it’s not that.” 

“Then what is it? Why did you run away?” 

“I -” I swallowed thickly, trying to push past the lump in my throat. This was a moment I had been fantasising about for months, but all I could feel was a deep sadness. There was nothing good about the reason we were talking under these circumstances. A girl had died. It only acted like a dagger in the heart. Why did I push him away, if he was only going to get tangled up in it anyways? A crushing weight fell on my chest, a sudden grief washing over me over all of the memories we could have made. 

I couldn’t formulate the words. I couldn’t describe the lead weighing me down, or the total and utter terror I felt when I realised Eddie was in danger just by being associated with me. I didn’t know how to tell him the real reason I pushed him away was, secretly, to protect myself, so I never had to see him perish in the way Max saw Billy suffer. 

“That’s fine, I get it. Guess you finally got sick of the freak, huh.” His head bowed. My heart sank. He was already hurting - he witnessed his middle school crush viciously die, had been shunned by the town and felt all alone - and all I was doing was adding to that. 

“It's not that.” 

A beat of silence passed, then two. He lifted his head to peer at me through the curtains of curly hair, his head quipped to the side. “Then why?”

“Did you not listen to a word Henderson just said?” I huffed a dark laugh, shaking my head. I rubbed a hand across my jaw, finding myself focusing on the opposite wall to stop myself from breaking down. “This is some heavy shit, okay. It’s not like D&D where you can pause the campaign to take a pee break or you can die and create another character. This is,” the thickness of my throat choked the rest of my words. 

I stood up abruptly, storming out the door. It slammed with a thud behind me. I took in a big gulp of air, closing my eyes and I breathed in, and out, and in, then out. I calmed down my racing heart, banishing the images playing behind my eyes from my mind. I squeezed my eyes tightly to remove the image of Billy hanging in the air, mouth spewing blood. I shook my head to erase the image of Bob being torn apart, Joyce’s anguished cries breaking my heart. 

A hand landed on my shoulder. 

A shriek ripped out of me. I shrugged the hand off, feeling my muscles tense as I darted around, fists clenched to see… Eddie, standing a few feet away with his palms raised in surrender. Instantly my muscles relaxed. A wave of exhaustion invaded my body. 

“Don’t do that.” I breathlessly warned, pinching the bridge between my brows. 

“I’m sorry, I called your name like a thousand times.” Eddie’s eyes raked up and down my body, his eyes soft with concern. “Are you okay?” 

I brushed the question aside. “Let’s get back inside.” 

Eddie followed me wordlessly back into the shed, lingering close. He closed the door gently behind him, leaning on the wood. He watched me silently as I paced up and down, feeling the urge to release all of my pent up energy. 

“So,” he sent me a teasing smirk. “What are your new friends like?” 

I wanted to tell him that they were nothing in comparison to Eddie. Sure, they were great for saving the world, but everyone in that group already had their person. Steve had Robin, Nancy had Jonathan, the kids had each other. I always felt like a spare piece when we were hanging out when the world wasn’t in danger. We were trauma bonded and I would always feel close to them - never in the way I felt about Eddie. 

A small smile graced my lips. “They’re okay, but for some reason no one wants to graffiti the school at 3AM.”

Eddie’s face mirrored mine. “Remember when the cops showed up?” 

“I ran so fast I got a cramp.” 

His face lit up. “They seem like a bunch of buzzkills.” 

“I mean, they have saved the world three times. Got to give them some credit.” 

“They lose points for the lack of graffiti.” 

“I agree.” 

My cheeks were starting to hurt with the strength of my smile. The words tumbled out before I could reign them back in. “God, I’ve missed you.”

Just like that, the happy moment was shattered. The smile dropped from his face and a look I hadn’t seen before clouded his features. He didn’t say another word, retreating into a corner turning his back to me. The knife in my heart twisted. I caused this. I made him unhappy. I wanted to protect him; all I ended up doing was hurting him. 

We carried on in this pattern. Talking, being on the brink of reconciling and then falling apart all over again. I hated it, and no matter how hard I tried to fix it, nothing worked. I tried talking to him in the boat whilst trying to find Watergate, I tried to talk to him while in the Upside Down after following Steve in, and I tried talking to him whilst he sat in the trailer waiting for everyone to get the weapons. Each conversation we had sent us further and further away from the friendship we once shared and I hated it to my core. 

I vowed to try one more time. If it didn’t work, then I’d accept the consequences and mourn the relationship we once had. 

I waited until we dropped Max, Erica and Lucas off at the Creel house before I approached him. He was staring out of the window of the motorhome, gazing distantly at the scenery passing by. Dustin saw me walking closer, glancing between the pair of us. 

“I’m just gonna go over there.” Dustin bolted to his feet, moving out of sight. I took up the seat where Dustin was sat, playing with my fingers. After so many attempts to reconcile, I wasn’t entirely sure how to start. Luckily, Eddie did the job for me.

“You again.” Eddie muttered, his attention still on the world outside. 

I huffed a nervous laugh, “Yeah, me again.” 

“What do you want?” He sounded so defeated. I wanted to reach out and hug him the way I used to - I knew I no longer had that privilege. 

“I just wanted to talk -” 

“About what, huh?” Eddie interrupted me, finally breaking his eyes away from the glass. He stared at me, a disbelieving curve to his lips. “I think we’ve already established that you ran away because you're you. Don’t worry, I’m used to it.” 

All of the hope rushed out of my body. With a deep breath, I pushed myself upright, taking a step away from him. I turned my thoughts back to the days where I would stay over at his trailer, reading music magazines until the sun was way below the horizon. I recalled the times I was frustrated, and he’d nod his head to the woods outside school where he’d hand me a joint and we’d unwind, snickering about the most mundane of things. I remembered how after StarCourt, he hugged me like I was glass, because whilst he didn’t know the whole story, he knew I was hurting. 

He was my person. I was not going to give up that easily. 

“No.” I turned on my heel, my voice raising an octave. “You don’t get to tell me why I did what I did. You don’t know. And if you knew, you’d have even the tiniest amount of sympathy for me.” 

He raised a brow. He opened his mouth as if to talk, but I cut him off. “You’ve had plenty of time to talk, Munson. It’s my turn.”

Sucking in a deep breath, I started spewing out every word I’d held back over the past few days. “Do you have any idea how hard it was to push you away? Do you have any idea how much that killed me? You are my person, Eddie Munson. You are the closest thing I have to a brother in this world and it fucking devastated me to see you in the halls, but not even smile at each other anymore.”

My vision grew blurry. I didn’t care, letting the tears spill down my cheeks. “But you know what hurts more? The thought of you dying. All of this backwards shit that’s happened over the past few years has killed people, Eddie. I have watched people die in front of my eyes and all I could ever think about was how I would feel if that was you.” I jabbed my finger at him aggressively, uncaring about the spit flying from my mouth. “People who get involved in this get hurt. They get hurt, or they die. I couldn’t let that happen to you. So I pushed you away. But now you’re here and it was a waste.” 

I was borderline hyperventilating, my finger still raised in the air. “I lost months of memories with you and now you’re here and I,” my breath hitched in my throat. “I’m not sure I can protect you.” 

I saw Eddie unravel before my eyes. His indifferent demeanour changed as he opened up his arms, gesturing for me to come forward. I didn’t waste a minute, lurching into his arms and feeling them wrap around me. I sobbed into his jacket, relishing the scent of weed and leather enveloping my senses. His hands brushed up and down my back, his voice soothing me. 

By the time my tears slowed down, the vehicle pulled to a stop. Everyone awkwardly lingered as I pulled myself from Eddie’s embrace, sniffling. He placed a delicate hand on my neck, smiling at me softly. “I’ve missed you too, you stubborn asshole.” 

I was elated. Such pure happiness consumed me that I felt no fear when walking into the Upside Down again. I felt little anxiety as Dustin, Eddie and I were boarding up the trailer, preparing ourselves for what was to come. I only felt the tiniest drop of fear as Eddie began to play Master of Puppets on his guitar, the fear trickling in as I saw the swarms of bats gunning towards us against the red sky. 

The bats were closing in quickly. Dustin begged Eddie to finish sooner, I tightened my grasp on the spear in my hand. Eddie finished the solo in the nick of time, the three of us rushing down the ladder and into the trailer. The door slammed shut with a resolute thud. I felt myself relax against the metal, grinning wildly to myself as I witnessed Eddie and Dustin jump up and down for joy. 

I wanted to share in their excitement, I really did. But my experiences told me that something worse was coming. The pit in my stomach began to grow as the thudding of the bats became louder against the metal. 

A bang. My gaze snapped upwards to see bats threatening to come through the vent. Instinctively I moved towards it, swinging my spear up and killing the ones threatening to enter. Dustin joined me, throwing his spear as randomly as I was, praying that the swarm would stop. My arms were beginning to ache with the repetitive motion and yet the bats kept on coming. 

“Move,” Eddie commanded, holding the nail-filled shield and jamming it into the vent, effectively blocking the hole. 

“Good call,” I complimented, bent over and hand squeezing my side. 

Eddie nodded, seemingly content with himself. The battering had seemed to quieten and I took a moment to rejoice. 

Dustin froze. “There’s not anymore vents, are there?” 

I exchanged a look with Eddie. I knew this trailer inside out after all the years spent in it, and by pure instinct my feet guided me towards the back room, grinding to a halt as I saw the bat claws ripping open the vent. A huge gust of bats swooped into the room. I pushed Eddie and Dustin back behind me, bringing the door shut with a thud.

We were trapped in the living room, bats in rooms on both sides. The only place left to go now was back up the rope. Eddie encouraged Dustin up the rope, sending him a reassuring smile. 

“I’m right behind you, buddy.” Once Dustin was safely on the other side, he gestured for me to climb the rope. I held it in my hands, pausing for a moment as I looked at Eddie. He was on edge, a sorrowful look in his eyes. Even after all these months of being apart, I knew right then what he was planning. My heart dropped. I had already left him alone once, I wasn't going to do it again.

I let go of the rope. 

“What are you doing?” He exclaimed, passing the rope back to me. “Climb!”

“What, and let you have all the fun?” His face dropped. 

He paused for a moment. “Are you sure?” 

“You’re my ride or die, Eddie, of course I’m sure.” 

“And you say I’m the stubborn asshole.” He grabbed his spear, deaf to Dustin’s protests. In one fell swoop he effectively severed the tie between our worlds. 

I ignored Dustin’s pleas, snatching up my own spear and sucking in a breath. My heart was racing in my chest and my mind screamed at me to turn back, to find some way back through the gate; my heart told me to follow him. I wasted too much time pushing him away to protect, now I was going to do the very thing I swore to do when I ended our friendship months ago, 

Eddie swung the door open, rushing towards the bike in the yard. I was hot on his tail, trying not to hyper focus on the number of bats lurking around us, jumping on the back spokes of the bike. He began pedalling furiously, body swinging side to side with the energy. I grasped tightly onto his shoulders, my spear digging into his shoulder. I turned around, sensing the bats gaining on us. 

“Pedal faster!” 

“What do you think I’m doing?!” 

In one moment I was standing upright, the next I was thrown to the ground. The road bit into my cheeks as I came to a stop. Panic coursed through me as I struggled to see Eddie amongst the black mist of bats. 

“Eddie!” I clambered to my feet clumsily, ignoring the faint burn of my knees and hands. I grabbed my spear from where it had fallen, hitting the few bats that were in my way. I was closer to the swarm now. My eyes nearly fell out of my head as I saw Eddie at the eye of it all, swinging ferociously with his spear and screaming a battle cry. 

My worst fear was going to become a reality. 

Adrenaline pounded through my veins. With a shriek of my own, I ploughed into the sea of bats, striking at them in a deadly dance. Bodies started to fall around me as I got closer to Eddie, moving at such speed it felt unnatural. 

A bat bit into his shoulder. 

I moved faster now, the sight of his blood sending me into a blind fury. I was within reach of him when I saw a bat swerve down, aiming straight for his neck. I didn’t think, I acted on instinct. I shoved Eddie out of the way, feeling the bat's teeth tear into my jugular. An animalistic scream left me as I pulled it away, blood spurting profusely. With all the energy I could muster, I slammed it into the floor, stomping on its head. 

The world started to spin. Absent-mindedly my hand drifted to my neck, and when I looked back down at it, it was slick with red. I wanted to laugh, unable to believe it had taken this long for this world to break me.

I heard Eddie scream my name, just as all the bats started falling limp. They died around me as I fell, crashing harshly into the ground. Eddie was by my side instantly, wide eyes staring into me. His hand fell on my neck - I hissed at the contact, but he wouldn’t let go. He pressed down harder, forcing a cry of agony out of me. 

“It’s going to be okay.” He whispered. We both knew he was saying it for his own sake. I knew my fate the moment I let go of that rope. 

“You can’t die on me yet.” Eddie warned, his gaze glassy. “We have a lot of catching up to do, you and I. I need to tell you all about the new campaign, about the little squirts, and we need to go graffiti the school. You are always so good at that.”

I smiled weakly, coughing lightly. Blood wet my lips. I felt Eddie’s hand press down harder. “Why isn’t this working!” He cursed, ripping the bandanna off his head and pressing that to the wound. I knew it was fruitless; I didn’t have the energy to argue. I just relished in being close to him, to the new memories we made in the last few days. 

I lifted my hand, cupping his cheek. He froze, lip quivering. “You deserve the world and more. Don’t let,” I coughed, ignorant to the spew of blood that projected up. “Don’t let anyone tell you otherwise.” 

“You’re going to be fine. You’re going to -” He started to ramble, cutting himself off as he started to notice my ghostly complexion. “You’re my best friend. I love you.” 

I missed hearing those words after so long. “I love you too.” 

I heard footsteps approaching, Dustin’s cries of anguish. I tried to hold on a little longer to say goodbye; death had other plans. As I felt death’s scythe swoop over me, I managed to utter my final words to this planet. 

"Thank you for being my friend."

stranger things masterlist