#I get to see bmth too so that’s also very cool

[tacticalfemwile]

*stumbles out of the ticketek presale covered in blood and missing multiple limbs* I go sleep token :)

[smileymoth]

@pikslasrce tagged me to post my top albums from this year :))

senses fail - still searching // armor for sleep - what to do when you are dead // senses fail -let it enfold you hollywood undead - hotel kalifornia // boysnightout - make yourself sick // wilbur soot - your city gave me asthma alesana - the emptiness // bedwetters - meet the f@cking bedwetters // bring me the horizon - sempiternal

do not ask me how many times i've listened to these 9 albums idon't even know myself. it's way too much though. i couldn't put all 4 boysnightout albums here so i just stayed at 1 and put it in the very middle because they altered my brain chemistry <33

senses fail gets 2 albums because i didnt spend weeks only listening to those 2 albums for no reason... their lyrics mean sm to me i want to illustrate the albums or songs one day. this goes for both senses fail and boysnightout btw. AND armor for sleep. there's something about that specific album. i realised i really enjoy albums that tell a story. and the fact that i like themes of angst love blood betrayal etc etc is no surprise either. car underwater got played way too many times

i discovered bedwetters thanks to eurovision, they were one of the options for estonia and i ofc found their old and only album (they released a new one a few weeks ago tho) (i dont know why they have 2 spotify accounts. im not asking). i even got to see them live bc they gave a free concert during summer <33333333 i got a picture with the band too !!!!! so cool

the new hollywood undead album got me back into them so im back to being obsessed. i love my silly california guys :3 i've been keeping up with them since and i desperately need to draw them again, this time without their masks!!!! im very glad that i found alesana to be sooo palatable this year because ive tried to listen to them before when i was a teenager and it just... didn't click, even if i tired. so yeah i get to fix that mistake now.

in spring i had a moment where i listened to sempiternal on repeat on the cd player for multiple days straight and in the past month i've, again, been listening to bmth and specifically sempiternal again so it gets a special place, too.

wilbur is just there because i had jubilee line stuck in my head so so so so much and also it's the best study music ever. also wilbur why is i'm sorry boris so silent. i can barely hear it it makes me angry so i always skip it. and then bc its the end of the album it gives me some lmanburg flag cover-art song that i don't like

anyway here's a special mention to these 3 albums because 1) greeley estates - caveat emptor, i just discovered it this week and i am in love. also greeley estates has been in my radar for quite some time now and i find the singers voice to be very pleasant and interesting? the tone does sth for me 2) brand new - deja entendu, for being stuck in my head for a good week because the tommy gun song wouldn't leave my head since it came on shuffle from my saved mp3 list when net was down 3) just surrender - if these streets could talk, because again i was obsessing over this for like a good week before i forgot about it. good album. not available in serbia tho for some reason

can you tell i love talking about music that i like. i know nothing about music it just makes me happy. :)

anyway i am tagging uhhhh @varteeny1234 and @complicatedsurgery and uhhh @cactusringed and uhhhh anyone else who wants + i'm not gona tag you, sly, because you only listen to alex g anyway <3

[beenbaanbuun]

You made a joke saying you two-stepped to turbulence lol. Which made me want to ask.

Do you listen to any metal/metal core/ hardcore bands.

If so can we get married?

yes i do!!!!!!

my favourite band is bmth!! i saw them and bad omens in january and it was very cool!! i saw knocked loose last month too which was also insane 😭😭 i was supposed to see don broco last year too but the venue got closed bc its falling down :D

i could go on forever about all my favourite bands, but i won’t 😓 for now i will just say that yes, we can get married!!!!

[rocketdive]

mcr/bmth report (kinda)

wall of text under cut

also no, this wasn’t we were young fest 

queueing so i can think about it later

mcr finally happened after hanging on to those tickets for 2 years

Honestly was not expecting them to be so incredibly good live, idk what i was thinking

i also went to do something on the way to the concert and ran into someone i kinda know

ootd: (when you wanna be a nerd at 6pm, but have an mcr concert to attend at 7:30 pm)

too lazy embarrassed to do emo makeup in public

also fuck when i got to the venue i probably chose the longest line for the loo and the slowest merch line

really wanted to get that bag (and i did)

got a bag for me bag as well

talked myself out of getting a shirt tho

was it worth 1.5 hrs tho 

literally was in the merch line for both openers

also me yelling at one of the dudes to get the plastic merch bag XD ...because he was about to refuse it 

when i finally found my seat, at least the girl in front of me was totally rocking out / seemed pretty cool even tho we didn’t talk

we didn’t get gerard way’s fashion show (i think???) for my date, but dad hat came out

also i am not used to his speaking voice

Gerard way has some absolutely feral screams

^ an entire mood

He had some programming thing to add microphone effects, which was cool

Also the whole time i was just like…. I’m also in the same room as frank and mikey and ray!!!!!!

(lmao finally seeing thee mikey fucking way in the flesh)

Ray jumping around

Ray kneeling while doing his guitar thing at the end

There was that one song where gerard was trying to get ray to sing along as well

we also sang happy birthday

stoked that we got vampires for that date

Backdrop changed 3 times? There was 1st to curtain drop reveal of the backdrop, and then lights on for the backdrop

ALSO HOLY I DIDN’T REALIZE THE ENTIRE SET WAS 20 SONGS NO WONDER IT FELT SO LONG

didn’t run into my brother’s ex lmaooooo

honestly was kinda saving energy for bmth / made the wrong shoe choice and entered me back hurty time :c

          anyhoos

bmth was really good

like REALLY good

i think that might be an understatement

tb very h i enjoyed bmth more than mcr

their video was ON POINT

Like at points they instructed the crowd to form a pit or sit down

"Illegal substances are strictly prohibited, please consume them immediately" (something along those lines)

honestly really glad that my friend was being an enabler / & that i actually went

Was watching some recording of the NY show and they didn’t have confetti to open

Also the confetti was heart shaped (but i couldn’t tell from where i was)

And then red streamer confetti during throne

at some point, oli acquired a light up devil horn headband and he put it on

It also flashed

Oh apparently oli had bloody makeup or something but obvs couldn’t see it

the girl next to me was really cool! and peeps in front of me were totally vibing

Can you feel my heart into happy song is such a mood

Ngl, the newer songs / post that’s the spirit were kinda…weaker with the crowd

Except maybe teardrops? Dear diary? Maybe parasite eve?

Sandpit turtle shadow moses was so good live

Kingslayer was a rave / literally oli calling it a rave song

Also not me and temp concert buddy doing the babymetal parts of the chorus lmaooooooooooo

Accidentally butt recorded most of diamonds

Also wtf they played diamonds

(i cannot remember lyrics part 65431235768767)

Follow me was acoustic

Lgbtq flag ^

Forgot which song towards the end, oli was telling people to get on each other’s shoulders

Mosh pit for knocked loose was just as described/expected

Literally first song starts and their vocalist is calling for a pit

imo, GA went harder in the pit during KL than bmth

i’m going to put “saw kl live and was completely ok” on my resume

ok coz everyone talks about how ridiculously chaotic kl is, to make an analogy in terms of spice tolerance level, -> handling the spice level is not an issue for me, it’s just not a flavor i really like or dislike, but also a flavor that i would be ambivalent about/wouldn’t mind trying again IF it just happened to present itself to me (as in, i wouldn’t go seeking it out, but would be down if it was just readily there)

Honestly the pits during bmth looked weaker than the ones for KL

esp the one where oli was doing the whole “PUSH IT BACK YOU PUSSIES”

(also for the record i did not get a GA/pit ticket because i am a pansy / was recovering from mcr/ I’M GETTING OLD)

i didn’t realize Grandson was so openly political

I think some dude in a wheelchair crowdsurfed during his set?

Siiickbrain had some pretty sick vocals / screams

10/10 would do it again

[darklightmiwxo]

MIW history

Hello I want to make a history and facts post of MIW. I been a fan for a few months so I may miss some stuff out. New fans can check this out to understand more of the band.

Motionless in white members:

[IMG=OAA]

Name: Chris motionless (cerulli)

Full name: Christopher Cerulli)

Age: 34

Birthday: October 17 1986

Zodiac: Libra

Birth place: Scranton Pennsylvania

Height: 6'1

Role: main singer

Relationship Status: single

Chris says he doesn't want to get married.

Fear: heights and flying

Personality: a really kind person who cares for his fans he's funny and has a dad humor. Everyone just see him as a dad to them.

Interest: Chris really loves dogs. He plays video games halo and call of duty he plays it all the time. His fave bands is slipknot,marlin manson,korn,HIM,and more rock bands.

[IMG=EOZ]

Name: Ricky Olson (horror)

Full name: Richard Alison Olson the third

Nick name: Rick

Age: 32

Birthday: September 1st 1988

Birth place: Seattle WA

Lives: Scranton Pennsylvania

Zodiac: Virgo

Height: 5'6

Uni: he studied film production in college but dropped out for the band.

Role: rhythm guitarist and backing vocalist

Relationship status: taken by Jamie L

Fear: dying alone,being hated,failing

Personality: he's a calm sweet person he's very smart and also really kind. He's a good caring friend. However he can be a troll sometimes and mess around with everyone because he loves doing it. He loves his fans so much. He's a shy boy.

Interest: he loves to write,draw,edit,take photos, record videos,run his YouTube channel,create a mini sketch video to post on his channel, being a director,he loves cats and reading books.

Ricky fave bands is: muse,HIM,afi,slipknot,BMTH,Ariana grande,Ellie goulding.

[IMG=NEP]

Name: Vinny Mauro

Full name: Vinchenzo Mauro

Nick name: vin,chenzo,sachetti

Nationality: Italian American

Age: 27

Birthday: Nov 22 1993

Birth place: jersey shore Pennsylvania

Zodiac: Sagittarius

(he's also a Sagittarius Scorpio cusp)

Height: 5'6

Uni: vinny study computer programming but he dropped out of college to join the band in 2014

Role: drummer

Bands: MIW,suffer club,trap demon

Relationship Status: single

Fear: being hated by people

Personality: in most of Ricky vlogs vinny seem extroverted he is loud around friends and has lots of fun being silly. But in reality there is a side to him that isn't easy to see you can see it in his twitch stream. He's actually really introverted he said this himself. He's calming and sweet he interact with fans a lot and making sure fans respect each other. He loves to be alone in his room for many days avoiding human contact. Vinny mention being too shy to go up to new people but he is fine if people go up to him. He doesn't feel comfortable talking to new people. He likes being alone.

Interest: creating rap beats,playing video games,making music,dogs and cats,playing drums.

Vinny fave artist are: Fall out boy,paramore,korn,panic! At the disco,HIM,my chemical romance,arch enemy,maroon 5,emeiem,Ariana grande,dua lipa,Mack millo,doji cat,bring me the horizon,pierce the veil,sleeping with sirens,all time low,black veil brides,Rihanna,linkin park,green day,evanescences.

[IMG=XHH]

Name: Ryan Sitkowski

Age: 30

Birthday: Jan 8,1991

Zodiac: Capricorn

Birth place: Pennsylvania

Height: 5'11?

Uni: he dropped out of college to join MIW

Role: lead guitarist

Relationship Status: taken

Fear: spiders

Personality: Ryan is a chill person he's shy and caring to fans. He's also a troll he loves to mess around with his friends.

Interest: guitar,video games,trading card games.

Bands: the same as the rest of miw probably.

[IMG=QFE]

Name: Justin morrow

Age: 32?

Birthday: May 11th

Birth place: Caledonia, New York

Zodiac: Taurus

Height: 6'1

Role: bassist

Relationship Status: married

Fear: ?

Personality: Justin is a kind chill person who cares for his fans and his friends. He left ice nine kills to right away help MIW on tour. Justin is also a troll he loves trolling his friends.

Interest: videos games but not a nerd like the others,bass,cosplaying,putting makeup on.

Bands: the same as MIW

Motionless in white history:

The band started in high school of 2005

Chris,Angelo,Frank p,Kyle white being the first members of the band. Later after college and the bands demo releases Josh joined the band. Frank moved to bass. Micheal and TJ join as guitarist. Later on micheal left the band and Chris met Ryan. Ryan then joined as guitarist of the band. Chris met Ricky in 2009. Frank left the band and Ricky was the new bassist for MIW.

MIW got more popular in 2009 when they tour around the state's in a van. Tj left the band a year later to join escape the fate (Ronnie radke of falling in reverse old band and bless the fall singer Craig band) Ricky then became the new rythmn guitarist of the band. Ghost (Devin) join as the bass player of the band. During the infamous album creation Angelo was feeling ill he couldn't play drums well anymore he gets tired easily and his drum skills wasn't good at all he was eating bad that it make him weak. He couldn't drum anymore so he left the band. The band had other drummers help record their albums. Brandon was the touring drummer for the band till the end of the reincarnated album. The band met vinny and he became the new drummer he was in the reincarnated music video playing drums but you can't see him much in the music video. Vinny then became a member of MIW not a tour drummer anymore but a actually member of MIW. Josh left the band around this time. In the graveyard shift era after the making of the album the whole band kicked ghost out of the band because the fans told the band what ghost did to fans which was very gross. The band kicked him out and Justin from ice nine kills join the band as bassist then he quit ice nine kills to be working full time for MIW. Disguise is the first album where the whole current members of the band created songs without other people doing it for them.

Chris history from high school to now:

Chris grew up in Pennsylvania. He met his friends who end up being the band members of the band he wanted to create he wasn't expecting to be the main singer. At a young age Chris started getting tattoos everywhere.

Chris cared about the band and just went for it.

Demos of the band was created. Chris is a perfectionist he wants the album to be perfect so he was judging everything in order to make a album he liked. Band members left but he didn't quit the band he try to find new band members and try to meet new bands. He worked hard for the band he carry the whole band and make sure the band was doing well. Chris thanks Ryan and Ricky for being the most loyal band members staying with him all these years and not leaving him. Chris had the fear of failing the band breaking up and Chris dreams crushing down but Chris didn't let that happen at all. And here we are today.

Ryan Sitkowski college to now:

Ryan dropped out of college to join MIW at age 17. He was new to the band and Josh didn't like him at all. Ryan was at a young age traveling all over the state with the band. Ryan haven't shared much of his life on the internet he kept it more private. Ryan got a girlfriend and then when the lockdown happen he started streaming on twitch to interact with fans and made a discord too.

Ricky Olson high school to now:

Ricky is the oldest of his siblings. When Ricky was young he was playing with his friends sports and something hit his tooth so half of Ricky teeth is fake. He mention he cry to his mom on the phone because of it. Ricky in middle school wanted to be in a band because his friends played instruments and he wanted to join them. Ricky in high school was a shy boy who had a few friends but they were mostly fake friends. Ricky Olson begin to play guitar and write stories because of the inspiration of Ville Valo from HIM. He became obsessed with HIM. Ricky was in a band in high school as the lead singer but was kicked out for sounding like Ville valo. One of Ricky dreams was to be in a band and also a film maker. In college he study film production. While also working in band merch booth selling band merch to people. But since Ricky was too shy he got yelled at for not speaking up and selling more. Ricky was in a bad time around 2008 and 2009. He share this in a blog years ago about this. He was in a lost place had a bad past and he was thinking of the past all the time and future worrying about failing the future he wanted to be in a band but he was so lost he had no idea what to do in his life. He would day dream about being in a band and then cry to sleep every night about his life. He had depression and gave up with everything in his life. He drank achoul every day. One day on his sister 16 birthday Ricky was drunk coming home from work to go to his parents house his sister was sleeping in her bed.

Tw// self harm and suicide attempt:

Ricky was laying in his sister's bed he cut his arm with a knife it was a lot Ricky was sobbing while watching the blood going down his arm to the floor his dad saw what happen and ask Ricky what happen. Ricky was sobbing and yelling he wanted to die many times. He passed out and went to the hospital he lost a lot of blood and the achoul level was really high he drank way too much. He almost died. He end up getting better and went to see a therapist. He went to see MIW with a friend. Ricky met Chris and the band thought Ricky was cool so he invited them to stay at his house. Chris text Ricky being like should join our band. Ricky would often say idk if I should he didn't know if he would be good enough for the band.

He later on join and quit college but Ricky mention still feeling depressed while in the band. Josh ballaz disliked Ricky when he joined too. 2 years later Ricky moved to rythmn guitarist but he wasn't used to playing guitar since he mostly did bass so he often made mistakes on guitar. He was still learning to play guitar. Things got better for Ricky. But his dream job was always filming he does some film stuff on tour and at home. Though he knew he probably won't be a film maker for movies like he dream of doing he makes whatever he can make. Ricky has stomach problems he often went to the doctor because of it.

Vinny Mauro childhood to now:

Vinny is one of the youngest children of his family. He has many siblings. Vinny mention on stream that he had a bad past. He mention that his dad would take achoul all the time and not give a fuck about vinny. Vinny mom would always go after Vinny. Vinny as a kid was a trouble maker he would disobey his parents and think it was funny. His mom would throw stuff at him and threaten him. His dad gave him a drum set so vinny end up learning to play drums he self taught himself to play drums. He listen to music and got into new types of music he likes all types of music. In middle school a girl that he liked asked him if he can play paramore on drums and vinny played it for her.

In high school vinny was a outcast and loner he made friends in his neighborhood but at school he had no friend. He didn't fit in with anyone. He mention in Ricky Olson podcast his high school life. Ricky ask him how he didn't find friends in high school. Vinny mention saying he didn't fit in with anyone he is also a shy person so he doesn't go up to new people. He was more a loner and was fine with it. Vinny went to uni to study computer programming but he didn't like it at all he was often bored he posted videos of him drumming on his YouTube channel. He knew a guy who knew MIW. MIW was looking for a drummer and they asked vinny to try out for drums in another country which was Australia. Vinny dropped out of college and told his parents what he was doing they weren't happy about that but he end up going over there trying out drums but he was very nervous. He met the band and then went to start drumming. Chris and Ricky were in the same room as vinny they were watching him play drums. Chris being very judgemental. He often scares Ricky when he's on guitar and Ricky fear to make a single mistake in front of Chris and vinny felt that fear. He even said I think I mess up a few times on drums. After he finish drumming. Ricky and Chris went to talk said not a single word and vinny was sweating so much thinking he made a mistake and he won't be part of the band. Later on Chris made vinny part of the band. Vinny became the tour member of the band then he became a member of MIW.

Years later vinny decided to interact more with fans since he had time to so he livestreams on twitch and has discord to interact with fans.

The lock down happen and vinny spend time interacting with fans. He lives with his friend in a house together. But something about vinny these few years mostly months to now that was starting to show. Vinny was suddenly showing signs of depression he often tweet depressing stuff but each year got worst for him. 2020 was the start of vinny's down fall. He had so much self hate he hated his hair,his body,his looks everything about himself he hate. He even tweeted saying I'm sad so I'm going to make a song. He release alone. Even he tweeted about something sad saying 2020 was a bad start for him and Ricky ask if he was ok and hoping vinny was just joking around. During December vinny had back pains because of a sneeze that hurt his nerves so vinny was in so much pain and he didn't see a doctor he thought he could fight it himself just taking pain meds to him. In Jan of 2021 the start of vinny down hill. He was in so much pain he couldn't leave his room or chair he couldn't even drum. He was very depressed. He hated life so much. A month later he got better and went back to streaming but still he was struggling there was some bad stuff happening anyway with him. The covid shot made him sick Saying he didnt eat anything for 4 days he felt like throwing up he even woke up in the middle of the night thinking he was going to do it and other stuff that made him depressed. Around April of this year small amount of fans notice something was going on with vinny he mention so much self hate about himself. In May he mention he was fine but a week later he said he was depressed and talking about what happen months ago and years ago. Sharing something about his family past and he stopped himself saying he doesn't want to get too into it. Vinny mention that he was eating food once a day because he felt like he is fat for over eating food all the time so he end up just eating dinner only everyday. He done it since the beginning of March and still is doing it. He wanted to loss weight. So he doesn't want breakfast and lunch but he eats dinner.

Around may vinny was in rock bottom he talk to no one at all even Ryan was 30 mins away from vinny and he ask him why he didn't go to see him and vinny said he didn't know why. Vinny mention saying he talked to no one for a week straight he also mention he isn't the kind of person to go up to people he said he's very introverted. he stopped streaming for weeks because he was doing bad. He said he felt burnt out and tired.

He took his break off social media for many weeks. Around this time many fans notice vinny was really not doing well.

Then he return to streaming around the 18th of June. Just to say hi he said he miss his fans but he plans to stream again a few weeks later. He mention that he have been avoiding all human contact and was staying in his room playing video games and drums all day still with the once a meal thing he does. Vinny said he's not depressed but people ask him about his depressing tweets and he said is it really depressing. Someone ask him why he is listening to sad music and he said am I not allowed to enjoy music. Now more fans are worried about him. Many more fans noticing that vinny isn't ok and he's hiding it.

That's basically all of MIW history I could give.

I will update and add more to the list later when something new happens. The vinny stuff is true I been watching his streams a lot and he mention those stuff so I just wanted to share what he said. I been a MIW fan for 8 months so I may not know Ryan and Justin as much as the others. Since they don't share much about themselves.

Hoping you enjoy this. Free feel to comment somethings I forgot to add.

Please don't argue about ghost ok. Ty

[mossnotes]

17 questions for 17 people!

(tagged by @ox-blr)

hello! i’ve been mia from tumblr for a long time because, well, i’m losing interest and seeing studyblr content isn’t motivating me the way it used to? so, i’m gradually re-entering this space in a different, healthier way, so consider this a reintroduction! 

nickname:

my name is carrie and i don’t really have a nickname? i used to get called caz or cazza (ew) a lot, and i recently made the connection that caz - or kaz - means i’m twinning with our good lord, kaz brekker hehehe. also for a while somebody called me pigeon (because of carrier pigeons, i guess?), so honestly if you want to call me pigeon go for it. it’s fun, at least. 

height: 

5′3″ or 5′4″, i think :(

zodiac: 

aries sun, libra rising, capricorn moon ! 

hogwarts house: 

slytherin !! (fun fact, i used to be a hufflepuff but changed to a slytherin within the same year, so, character development? or maybe, and more likely, villain/corruption arc? idk)

last thing i googled: 

how to toggle between items on minecraft inventory bar (i finally got java after playing bedrock my whole life so it’s taking some adjusting :D)

song stuck in my head: 

can you feel my heart - bmth (a tiktok of someone screaming it in the car came up on my fyp today and now that is ALL I WANT TO DO)

number of followers:

543 ! on my old account i got to 4k i think in the end? for some reason now, i can’t seem to gain followers and the ones i have aren’t very interactive :( i think maybe because tumblr seems to be like, dying out (finally?), especially studyblr. or maybe it’s me that’s getting bored of it and not being active enough for people to interact. hm. 

hours of sleep:

nothing (except anxiety-induced insomnia on sunday nights) will get between me and my eight hours. 

lucky number: 

7. i’m not sure why. or maybe it’s just my favourite number. is there a difference?

dream job: 

i don’t have a dream job because i don’t dream of labour in this capitalist hellscape working in a little bookshop sounds about as peaceful as retail work can get. i just want to sit on a stool behind the counter wearing my silly little granddad jumpers reading the books i was supposed to shelve. or, if my writing takes off, i want to be a rich elusive spinster living in the huge old house at the edge of my town, where i only ever appear in a long silk nightgown to deliver my latest manuscript bound in velvet ribbon to a gloved figure in the black car at the end of my drive. 

aesthetic: 

i’m such a sucker for dark academia, and dark or earthy tones. my tweed blazer is my most prized possession, even if i never get to wear it lol except for dramatic recitals of hamlet’s to be or not to be soliloquy. i’d love to be one of those people who wears pastel purple jumpers and strawberry dresses but, no. 

wearing: 

for all i just boasted about my dark academic adoration, i’m currently wearing trackies and my stepdad’s old help for heroes jumper, which i think i spilled tea on. (that was the most english sentence i’ve ever written bloody hell)

favourite song(s): 

lover, please stay - nothing but thieves

itch - nothing but thieves

medicine - harry styles

electricity - arctic monkeys

despair in the departure lounge - arctic monkeys

lose it - oh wonder

(i really like am and nbt can you tell?!)

favourite instrument: 

bass and electric guitar are so cool, i have an electric but i can’t play to save my life. also piano? if you play piano i am immediately infatuated with you. 

favourite author(s): 

donna tartt and v.e. schwab (also, mary shelley goes without saying)

favourite animal noise: 

the little chirp my cat does when she wakes up and immediately wants to know where i am

random: 

i lowkey hate studyblr just because of how glossy and amazing it is when studying literally never looks like that, and idk if it’s just me/my dash but as a mentally ill person it’s so hard seeing this constant productivity because most days i just do my online school (mostly from bed because i don’t have the energy or am just too uncomfortable at my desk because my room is on a tilt bc i live in a really old house and the desk is right on the tilt oop) and then i’m too shattered to study or do any extra. it blows my mind that there are people who study for like 8 or 10 hours a day with such insanely good self discipline... ah. idk that was a rant, studyblr used to be incredible for me and so motivating but i’ve really fallen out of love with it, so this blog might change direction a bit and go more writer/random/literature meme idk??? ily thank u for reading and sticking around w me mwah

tagssssss (it’s up to you if you do this or not, it’s just a bit of fun!!) @jasminesnotes @hyperchemblr @a-study-in-letters @eduardstudying @studylustre @studydiaryofamedstudent @studious-serpent @asteristudy @sonderstudy @cinnasbooks @soulmvtes @hannistudies @captainofstudies​

i know that’s not 17 people but honestly, whoever sees this and wants to do this, feel free! u are the remaining tag slots :)

[finnishhockeyelf]

I was tagged by @fangirlinglikealoon thanks for the tag!! 💞

Name: Camilla

Favorite musicians or bands: Ohh my. it’s hard to name favorites since I feel like I just listen to random shit or playlist nowadays all the time and not any artist/bands specially. And mostly I tend to like only couple of songs from a certain artist... Well. FOB is my all time fav alongside P!ATD, ATL, Imagine Dragons, BMTH, the Beatles The Goo Goo Dolls, 30STM. Oh gosh there’s lot. The Chainsmokers, Coldplay, Linkin Park... I like Elton John, all the 1D guy’s as solos, AJR, Sigrid etc. Fav finns are JVG, Pyhimys, Juha Tapio, Antti Tuisku, Ellinoora, Sanni, Olavi Uusivirta Kalle Lindroth& Ida Paul and Kasmir. Oh and Roope Salminen& Koirat, Mikael Gabriel too. fuck I can’t stop 🙈 I’ll probably think of 184 others right after I post this but here’s already too much so sorry!! 

Favorite sports teams: I only really follow NHL, and my favorite is Canes (surprise!). Right behind them are Stars and little further away on a shared third place are the Preds and Habs. Avs are cool too. From Liiga teams my faves are HIFK and Kärpät, but I don’t follow them enough to call myself a fan. I also don’t really follow football but if someone asks I’m a Real Madrid fan :D 

Other blogs: @cheesycami

Do I get asks: Quite rarely but feel free to send one if you feel like it! 

How many blogs do you follow: 57

What am I wearing: Pajama pants and a random collage shirt (is that how it’s really called like in the states?)  

Dream vacation: Uhhhhh there’s so much different things and places I’d like to experience 😩 One is to go somewhere in the Asian islands, like around Indonesia and see also the little authentic islands. Another dream would be to hike in the Western coast in the States (yes, this is 100% inspired by Cheryl Strayed’s book and I’m not ashamed to admit it), like in Washington or Oregon. There are also so much cities I’d like to visit. Also I’ve visited Madeira already once and I liked it really much and that kinda chill-out vacation where one just lays on the beach for 7 days straight would probably do me good, so that’s one dream too. 

Dream car: I don’t even have a lisence, and I live in a place where I don’t really need a car. I’m not even sure if I want one at all. So no dream car for me. 

Favorite food: Gahhhh this is hard too because I love food. I like lasagne, so I guess that’s like my one favorite dish. And I love sweet potato fries. Oh and salmon! I love salmon, raw and cooked. And I’m such a sweet tooth, oh dear. I love these one spesific salted caramel cookies. And chocolate. And pudding. Wish puddings were a bigger thing in Finland. 

Drink of choice: Idk if this is supposed to mean an alcoholic drink or just drink in general, so I’ll answer both :D Favorite thing to drink is definitely salted caramel latte. I could drink just that all the time. Fav alcoholic drink is probably sex on the beach, although it varies depending on the bar (some do very shitty sex on the beaches around here). Kossukola (finnish vodka + coke) is an easy fav which I end up drinking too often. 

Languages: Finnish, English and a little bit of Swedish, can understand also Norwegian. 

Random fact: I love knitting but it’s bad for by back so cant do it as much as I liked.

I’m not tagging anyone in particular but feel free to do this!! I wanna know yall so tag me!

[jakeoettinger]

I deadass don’t know who tagged me in this.. it was sitting half-completed in my drafts i’m sorry lmfao 

21 Questions

Answer 21 questions then tag 21 people you want to get to know better

1) Nickname:

Meg, Crash

2) Zodiac Sign:

Leo 🦁

3) Height:

5′2-3 i know i keep putting this but deadass it depends on the day.

4) Last Movie I Saw:

Lion King (2019) 

5) Last Thing I Googled:

um this strawberry key lime margarita mix i’m almost out of... which i got at home goods and i was trying to see the logistics of just ordering from the company’s website since homegoods wants to hoe me and not have any more.

6) Last Thing I Ate:

breakfast taco.

7) Last Song That Got Stuck In My Head:

cotton eyed joe has been stuck in my head roughly every other day since the draft.

8) Do I Get Ask?

sometimes

9) Following:

73

10) Followers:

4,059

11) Amount Of 💤:

mmm 7-10 on a good night. if i’m actually doing anything it’s usually a lot less.

12) Lucky Number:

13, 27, 14, 

13) What Am I Wearing:

um a leopard print blouse with black jeans and like brown/cognac espadrilles (we love adding height).

14) Dream Job:

Media for a sports team or organization.. social media, digital media, anything. it’s always been my ideal thing to be part of. any major sport really would be cool.

15) Favorite Food:

Mexican Food, Shrimp, Big fan of wings.., peanut butter, do margaritas count?

16) Play Any Instruments:

absolutely not

17) Languages:

literally only english 

18) Favorite Song:

Mr. Brightside x The Killers.. it just means a lot to me lol

19) Random Facts:

i made seth rogen laugh once. i witnessed harry styles riding a mechanical bull and met a very drunk niall horan.

20) Me As An Aesthetic Things:

I literally have no idea how to do this, but i’ll try lol.. going more for ‘my aesthetic’ over aesthetic things.. bc i’m not sure what those parameters are lol

burned cds full of 2000s pop punk, glossy pink lips, long hours spent driving to your favorite places, hockey jerseys, the brightest and warmest days spent outdoors,  laughing for hours at dumb comedies, stargazing at 2 am, astrology, astronomy, expensive perfume, bubble baths, jellyfish exhibits, margaritas at a hockey game, soft pinks and deep blues, spotify playlists, driving with your sunroof open singing as loud as you can, a slight sunburn and windswept hair on a boat, the smell of cotton candy and lavender.

21) Weirdest Way You’ve Been Described:

you tell me

This was in my queue and I got tagged by @teravaisteuvo on a very similar question list so i’ll add the questions that weren’t on here below! 

Favorite musicians: im gonna put bands here too instead of just individuals bc i don’t.. have a ton of individual favs.. blink182, joyce manor, mgk, pepper, abba, new found glory, taking back sunday, the wrecks, any band that was popular in the god-tier era of pop punk. and a bunch more here and there. 

Favorite songs: i mentioned mr brightside earlier but in addition to that.. fishin in the dark x nitty gritty dirt band, downfall of us all x adtr, coffeeshop soundtrack x all time low, turn my swag on x soulja boy, i think i’m okay x mgk and yungblud, break stuff x limp bizkit, bro hymn x pennywise (which also happens to be the texas stars goal song.. love that for me), follow you x bmth, literally joyce manor’s entire discography, that’s what you get x paramore, my friends over you x new found glory, anytime x eve 6, and sommartider x gyllene tider. all those you can turn on and its an instant reaction from me.

Dream trip: mm right now i’m trying to figure out how to logistically make flying into calgary and seeing banff for a few days, etc. and going to see the flames play the stars work and then going to vancouver the next day, see the stars play the canucks and stay in van a couple of days.. stay tuned. (it won’t happen but i want it to so bad)

[horriblehime]

I recently watched the Mukbang video on AmazingPhil's Channel and dan said sth about not having a personality and this thought was already in my mind for a good few weeks because I was thinking about what if i don't have a real personality but I just pick up behaviours from other people, series, fictional characters etc

and i started noticing that I don't or rarely say idiot anymore, instead I mimick Bobby from supernatural and say idjit

another thing would be (besides the huge amount of different slang (e. g. mate or australian, british, american accents etc) and insults I have learned from books, movies, series, memes) that I appreciate my asian features more since I started liking BTS. when i was in primary school i absolutely hated my apparence, that my mouth is so small, that my nose is literally non existent, that i am so short and the most feature I hated were my eyes. they were already small, surprise asian eyes but when I would laugh, they would disappear into nothing (a bit like jimin). this is why i would try to avoid laughing or wide smiling (another reason were my bunny teeth but I kinda arranged myself with them). But ever since I started appreciating asian culture (not only BTS but japanese stuff too) I don't think my non existant nose is bad or that I don't have a double lid or my eyes. So you can kinda say that the environment influences people and how they see themselves

but this was actually about not having a personality and not about me whining and analyzing why i suddenly don't hate my appearence anymore (BTS and japanese fashion mainly)

so as i said in the beginning (nobody remembers this anymore cuz i blab too much about myself. i am sorry) I thought about picking up behaviours from other people. There was this example with supernatural which was only a small thing but I dived further into the void which is my mind and noticed that I not only pick up small things like idjits but also complete attitudes

when I start liking a certain band, a fictional character or whatsoever I slowly start copying their attitude, like when I started listening to My Chemical Romance, SWS, BMTH, FOB etc etc (the list is endless) I started wanting to dress like them, I wanted to be like them because I thought they were so cool (I still think that, and wow this sounds like i am some old granny trying to educate her non existant grandchildren but they are not here bcs they don't want to hear her rambling)

and now I kinda get the point why parents say oh nooo, they are such a bad influence (is this me, gRowInG uP?!) because if you only see the point i mentioned (wanting to be like em etc) you really start worrying wether your kid will cut itself or whatever (i don't know whatever is, self harm was the only thing that came into my poor mind)

oh no i divigate again, anyway, copying attitude and appearence

I personally did this with the so called Emo Community and I thought it would never change, I would still be a slut for black ripped jeans, black hair with an emo fringe and piercings (I still am, therefore nothing changed) but I also started watching breedingunicorn and princessofpizzas videos and that's when i started taking interest in the Lolita fashion

at first i was slightly taken aback by the humongous amount of pastel pink and other kawaii stuff but slowly i started reading and learning more about japan (aka watching more breedingunicorns videos and reading wikipedia articles) and my style changed from jeez i don't give a fuck about anything just gimme something black to i still do like black but I also absolutely adore pastel blue, pastel pink, big bows and cute skirts and dresses. My character or personality (i feel very hypocrite writing this) however changed only a bit. i still do sarcastic remarks and laugh about stupid memes (a habit i got from dan) I still have the I don't give a shit about things I don't care (a great example are my grades) which i have from listening to rock and punk (though i don't want to blame them for being stupid and sucking at school, i just started to care less bcs of their music (which is considered as rebellious)) but i noticed that I care much more about my appearance, wether my clothes fit together and the aesthetic ever since I, yea i dunno. It probably started with me liking lolita and then discovering aesthetic tumblr.

another, maybe more extreme but also more short living, example is the book BUBBLEGUM on wattpad (great great book about Phan being insane and on a killing spree, 10/10 would read again) I always got the feeling of being delirious and crazy after I read some chapters (to strengthen the effect, listen to songs by Billie Eilish or Melanie martinez (mainly from her pre Cry Baby time, Dead to Me is A+). sometimes I even acted like i was a bit insane

(another short somewhat unimportant example. My love for oversized jumpers (and the word jumper) started after reading an unhealthy amount of Pastel!Dan and Punk!Phil fanfictions)

and my thoughts are kinda tangled with each other now but what i think my intention of this huge ass monologue nobody will ever read was analyzing wether I am just a fucked up person who has no identity and personality at all so I just copy my (current) Idols (this could turn into another huge ass monologue about influencing people and blah blah blah, and why I wanna copy them (is it because they are popular and secretely I just wanna be popular too)) or am I picking up different habits from different persons (e. g. your parents and later on celebrities) and this creates my own personality

to make a metaphor, is my personality a mirror and reflects a (changing) character i want to become or is it a blank canvas and all the different behaviours I imitate are like little colour specks which eventually create a picture which is in the end my personality

[merakiclosed]

Ahhh you’re moving >.< that must be really hectic also I’m sorry about getting back to you so late, I’m currently in the process of packing to go out of town for family related issues🤧. But yes they released a notice and I was like so sad because I had finally mastered doing HIT on hard mode as well as Bang! and Shampoo by After School.

I feel like our Change in music has to do with us finding our own individual identity?! So I just mostly find it hilarious how fast my taste in music and my playlists are affected by my moods depending on the day ( I will legit be singing Deathbeads by BMTH word for word one day and then singing Adore U the next) also you go and dance your heart out to alcohol free it’s such an addictive song😭💕 Omg that sounds terrible…I remember we went on lockdown around March and it was like a month too late and then reading stuff about other countries and how they were enforcing lockdown and how the UK was a bit slower but still I can’t wait for this pandemic to be over so you and other European carats can see the guys live💕Warped tour was the highlight of my early teen years I wish I could go back😭 the mosh pit was insane!!! But seriously metal heads are the sweetest like don’t let the music taste fool ya they can be the sweetest guys ever, BUT YES OMG I MET BVB I WAS SHOCKED I DIDNT CRY BECAUSE I ABSOLUTELY LOVE THEM but I don’t think that makes me cooolll😭💕

I didn’t get hurt, thankfully and I will never not thank the Dino fanboys who literally saved both me and the girl from harm (I lost my footing and I was about to fall over when one of the Dino fanboys grabbed my hoodie top, another one grabbed me by my belt loop on my right side and another from the other side) They were the real hero’s coanfjsjdn😂😂 Hopefully there will be another world tour when all this madness and the pandemic is over and you get to see the boys live one day and you’ll get to sing along to their set list and sing smile flower to them 🥺🤧💕 -🦊 anon

(IM COPYING AND PASTING THE SECOND MISSION IN ANOTHER ASK!)

Hihihi I am so so sorry this is late, it has been very hectic this week! But I promise you that everything is fine now and I should be able to answer you fairly quickly now!! I hope your family issues are not too bad and that everything is okay.

I definitely feel like finding ourselves has something to do with our music change! I think as the years have gone by, I understand what I like etc,. And heyyy you sound like such a cool person honestly, and I am enjoying to get to know you so muchhhh, so yes you are a cool person!! 💕You mastered HIT on hard mode too oh my goshhhh

Omg the Dino fanboys I love that 🥺 but yesss hopefully this whole pandemic thing goes away fast so many more carats and other fandoms can enjoy concerts! Though I will almost definitively be crying and singing 😂

[findteenpenpals]

Hey!!! I'm Cody, and I'm 16. I live in Pa, in the United States.

Hmm. Let's see; interests? Well...

- Drawing. I love art and drawing, I'm always doing it

- Anime/Cartoons. Yeah, I'm a pretty big nerd for that sort of stuff. Right now I'd say I'm most into Steven Universe but I like a tonnnnn of others.

- Video games. Don't even get me started tbh. I love all sorts of games. I play a lot of Overwatch and as of late ARMS so hmu if you wanna play.

- MUSIC. I love music so much. Honestly I appreciate all kinds of music but if you talk to me expect a lot of My Chemical Romance, Hawthorne Heights, Pierce the Veil, BMTH, and all that emo shit. I like the nu-age emo stuff like Melanie and top too, but not as much. I also enjoy punk and pop punk bunches.

"Perfect pen pal". Idk man. Just someone to talk to, someone that's fun and interesting. It's cool to have the same interests but even without that just meeting new people and having conversations is fun. I can get along with almost anyone so don't be afraid of saying smth.

Here's some of my social media linkus:

email - heyitscyvonix @ gmail . com

Tumblr - hey-its-cyvonix

Skype - total_inv3rsi0n

Contact me on whatever ya see fit.

Oh yeah and I have a very ironic and sarcastic/cynical sense of humor. From experience I know that people with a more average sense of humor are often turned away from me for that reason and don't really get it. That's not to say I can't have normal, serious discussions, but if that sorta stuff is a nono to you, then yeah. (Look out for rampant use of 80s slang and obscure film references with me) I'm also pretty awkward socially truth be told, so if it seems like I'm not responding appropriately or seem uninterested, I'm not, I'm just very bad at conversation. All-in-all I just want a cool internet friend who I can talk to whenever and maybe form a strong friendship with. Message me on whatever platform if you think we'd get along. Catch you later, dudes.

[nooneheardmyscreams]

Update:

Hi everyone! Just wanted to post a quick update on my life because I know my last "mental breakdown" post wasn't exactly comforting. So, the reason I was freaking out was because... well, remember in January when I got falsely diagnosed with herpes that turned out to be staph? Yeah, well it started to happen again 4 weeks ago and, logically, I lost my fucking mind. I called the doctor ASAP and she refused to give me the medicine, so I had to go into the doctor's office for an "exam", which seriously left me feeling like I'd been raped all over again. Now, please, don't get me wrong... those types of exams shouldn't be traumatizing, but because I wasn't mentally ready and was forced by circumstances into that situation, it was, of course, unbearable. I believe everything in life teaches us lessons and what I learned from that whole ordeal was the importance of being ready. Being ready is what tips the scales to "faced a fear", rather than "got traumatized again". Anyway, they run tests and she says it's staph and gets me on antibiotics. Things are starting to get better and 3 days later I leave for Europe to see my fiancé, AKA Jason (yes, the writer). We reunite for the first time in six months and it's wonderful and perfect, but the antibiotics start to not work as well. So, I go online and check the test results, which had just come in, and found out it wasn't staph; it was E. Coli. The doctor is trying to figure out a way to get me the new antibiotics and we go to three European clinics and a pharmacy and no one will give me the medicine. The only option is to send it over from America, but my dad doesn't want to spend the 200$ to ship it over here in order to keep me healthy 😑. Yeah, nice, right? Well, honestly, God truly blessed me because all of a sudden I just started to heal and get better and now I'm fine! God is really good. Next, I quit my nanny job because they were being super demanding and not paying me for the extra work they were making me do and I needed more free time to spend with my fiancé, my family, and to get my creative things done (like this), anyway. So, I get back from Europe on Sunday and have an interview with a new family on Monday. Working 3 days per week, I could get paid just as much, or more, than I was making working 5 days per week. Please pray that if this is what God wants for me that this will work out 😁 I got a call 2 days ago, at 1 a.m. I might add, from my manager saying that we are going to start heading into the final stages of releasing my music album!!!! Fuck yeah! 🤘🏻So, obviously, I'm just a..... A LOT excited! I'm also a little nervous because that means that my new job, wedding planning, and my album will all hit the fan at once. But they always say, "When it rains it fucking pours". Well, maybe only BMTH says it that way 😂 At least at this point it's raining good things! My time with my fiancé has been AMAZING! Seeing Europe from the point of view as an American has been very interesting. I like how open they are here about cursing, sex, religion, and politics. It's refreshing, honestly. Also, I got to drink alcohol for the first time since the drinking age is 18 here. What am I going to do without vodka and rum in America. FOR REAL! 😫 Death and Despair... that's what it will be like. But on the plus side, getting to cuddle with my fiancé all night and not be judged or ridiculed or given speeches about the indignity of it all was so nice. Jason's family is so cool and they truly made me feel like I was one of them already! I'm going to miss this beautiful country and some of its ideals and, most definitely, JASON! But I do have to say that I'm really missing American food and that I can't be too sad about going home because I have so many exciting things waiting for me, including getting back into the swing of posting on my life's work, this blog! 💜 Now, aren't the new writers AMAZING?? I've had some time tonight to go through and read some of their writing and they have honestly exceeded all of my expectations. So, to all of the writers, THANK YOU, THANK YOU, THANK YOU for keeping the encouragement going while I've been on vacation. I can see how much you're impacting my followers and I love all of the new points of view! Before I go, just a little novel update. Remember when I said I was thinking about writing a novel about silence? Well, I am. I've already started writing it and it's coming along quite nicely. It's going to be young and wild, but also profound and though-provoking in an introverted way. Most importantly, though, it's going to be honest... no lies, no sugarcoating, no tearing the bandaid off quick. I'm going to make people feel... and they're going to feel a lot. Thank you so much for your unwavering support for me and the No One Heard My Screams brand. You're love at its finest. 💜 Love, Kenzy

[finelinelarents]

46,58

46. what my last text message says

my last text is from @unorthodoxsavvy saying ‘haha that’s so cool’

58. description of my best friend

I personally find this question very offensive because there is no s in brackets after friend so let me fix it

58 description of my best friend(s)

That’s so much better, let’s begin:

For this post I will be describing Friend A and B from this post who actually are  my 2 idiot best friends

Friend A is Nepalese and has the worst luck out of all of us by that I mean she can’t see shit, has fucked up teeth, ( i can say that cause she’s my best friend but if you say it i’ll fight u(ง'̀-‘́)ง)  So she has these snazzy black and white glasses (which she looks rly weird without) and a sexy af retainer which you can see all the food that she eats when it gets stuck in there, so after lunch we have a daily retainer cleaning session which is extremely gross. Moving swiftly on; she has shoulder length dark brown hair and brown eyes the colour of muddy puddles / dog shit if the sun’s out. Shes literally 30cm shorter than me which makes for entertaining conversations, and she’s also very clumsy. She plays tennis on tuesdays, thursdays and sundays and has a brother who we all laugh about his hair on a daily basis. Lastly she’s literally scared of everything, i would list all her fears but theres too many so here’s the highlights: windows, sponges, horse hooves, the tube, trains, balloons and matches.(not even lit just in the box) 2 months ago she decided to go vegetarian whilst eating a chicken wrap from MacDonald’s and likes rock music especially BMTH 

Friend B is from the exotic town of Reading and also can’t see shit, but refuses to go to the opticians because ‘it’s not that bad.’ Her eyesight is extremely bad. She has the worst skin i’ve ever seen, it’s so bad a blind person would probably be able to read it as braille. (again i can say that cause she’s also my best friend but if you say it i’ll fight u (ง'̀-'́)ง) She has mousy brown hair that’s a bit longer than her shoulders and she insists that it goes blond in the sun/summer. It does not do this. She also has blue eyes which are nice and all but their kind of annoying because me and friend A have shitty brown eyes. She also insists that she has vampire teeth. She does not. Her incisors are normal. Friend B is also shorter than me but by only 12cm, she does ballet on saturday and sunday but is as graceful as a 3 legged elephant. She also doesn’t know the difference between 1 & 2 because when you say you have ONE life in a game she thinks this means 1 “practice” life and then another one after that. Friend B thinks her music is ‘alternative’. it is not. Her favourite singer is the not-really-well-known-nope-no-one’s-ever-heard-of-him Shawn Mendes. 

idk if you were expecting poetic descriptions such as ‘she has the most glittering blue eyes which dazzle even more, if that’s even possible, when she looks in the sun’ cause if you were plz leave as me and my friends have the beauty of sardines

Send me a number 💗

[emptyperspectiv]

Playlist of my life explanation (I’m gonna probably blog over this and just bookmark it for the list.)

I did this because I can’t sleep, also thank finding those teen vogue videos of this shit. The list itself is about 50 songs that I can sum up pretty quickly without having a huge long list since I sorted them out more or less as I was making it. So, let’s start!

My song picks: 

All The Small Things- blink-182

Initially, I had no idea who blink-182 was until I found this discarded CD one day outside when I was waiting for my bus to come pick me up. I was in middle school and I had this CD player and this was one of the songs on the CD. It was also in the end credits for Charlie’s Angels Full Throttle too.  

Cry Baby- Man Overboard 

One of the best underrated Pop-Punk bands I ever have listened to. A friend of mine introduced me to their music, this song I found on my own and the lyrics and just the tone of this song made me love it more. 

SING- MCR

MCR was introduced to me by a good friend of mine at the end of my 8th-grade year as we got into high school. Sing’s lyrics are something I connected with off the bat when listening to it. I love singing and I find it helpful for when I’m anxious and feel like it’s something everyone should try, even if you’re bad at it. 

crushcrushcrush- Paramore

While this wasn’t the first Paramore song I listened to, this is my favorite one to this day. It’s such a good song, and this was also the first album of theirs I bought at Hot Topic when I was younger. 

White Noise- PVRIS

Probably the one song I’ll go back to time after time for this band. Lynn has such an amazing voice, the band as a whole is just amazing. All their music and their videos are incredibly unique and paint this very ghost-like image that’s haunting, but also incredibly creative. This song specifically is one I connect with because of the lyrics. Sometimes communication between two people can be difficult, it’s also really hard when you are putting in the effort to talk to someone and they don’t listen. Especially in romantic relationships. Sometimes it’s that lack of communication and affection, as well as day to day life noise that you get drowned out by and the connection gets lost. Eventually, things break off and you feel almost like a ghost shouting into an empty void while the other person moves on. At least that’s how I see the song. 

Fight Club- Lights

This is just a fun song. Lights is an incredibly talented artist that I adore to bits. She’s worked so hard on her music and it really has grown over the years. It was a hard choice because all the songs on Skin & Earth are so good, but this just makes me wanna get up and kick ass. 

mother tongue- BMTH

After watching the Genious video explaining the lyrics it wasn’t hard for this to grow on me. BMTH has always been a deep favorite of mine, even when they made “heavy” songs. I just love the meaning of this song and it’s something I can relate to. 

Out Time to Go- State Champs

The visuals for the video that goes to this is so cool! State Champs is probably in my top favorites when it comes to pop-punk bands that I still listen to religiously. The lyrics are so good, they paint a very beautiful image of being under a dark starry sky. Aside from all the pretty visuals the lyrics paint, I think the lyrics connect with me about moving forward in life and not letting things in life hold you back from doing what you want to do in your life. It’s a very empowering message. 

Piece Of Your Heart- Mayday Parade

There isn’t a single Mayday Parade song that makes me feel emotional. They’re such a great band! I got to see them at Warped back in 2012 and took this really cool photo on my super shitty smartphone while I was up against the barrier hanging out with this group of girls who I eventually lost. This specific song makes me think about all my friends in a way, especially the starting lyrics of “Give me your misery, all of it give it to me I can hold on it for you it’s not a problem.” I know this song can be interpreted in so many different ways and the main message the band was trying to send as well. For me, this song is really about wanting to take on someone’s problems that you love because you love them so much that you want them to be happy. I think my favorite lyric would have to be “ You are the fire in my sleep, you are the reason I dream And just for when we’re apart I’ve got a piece of your heart.”

Strangers Again- Against The Current

This song really got to me after a while, the video for this is really good too. The message in the song itself is another one I connect with as well with things in my life that I’ve gone through where I’ve lost good friendships with people, as well as losing touch with friends and now when we talk sometimes they feel like complete strangers from when I knew them.  

From The Outside- Real Friends 

Real Friends are amazing too, again another personal favorite pop-punk band. This song’s message I think can relate a lot to the stigma of faking being fine when in reality we’re all dealing with our own internal battles, which they address in their lyrics. 

Help Us To Love- Tori Kelly

This song I feel relates a lot to how people treat each other today. We’re all full of this anger, we’re upset and frustrated and sometimes we tend to take it out on each other online with our words and other settings. This song tells us that we should try to be more accepting of those around us instead of being full of those negative emotions. Vocally, this song is so beautiful and sad at the same time and I just really love the way the song sounds. 

8- Billie Elish

This has to be one of my favorite songs by her, which is strange. I get it, but I love the lyrics so much because again it’s something I can relate to with how I am as a person. I tend to wear my heart out on my sleeve openly and try to be accepting of everyone, which leads to me getting hurt because I never really know what someone’s true intentions are. 

MOOO!- Doja Cat

This is just a fun song that I really love. Doja Cat puts the fun, sexy, and badass attitude in her music and I absolutely love it. Music doesn't have to be serious all the time and that’s why I love this song. 

S.L.U.T.- Bea Miller

Bea Miller is such a talented bean. I adore her music and her as a whole. This song when it came out just screamed at me to love myself and to just have fun. I remember first hearing it and just dancing to it and just feelin the vibes and myself. 

X-Phenomenon- Monsta X

Another good feel-good dance song. These boys really do know how to make some good ass songs that make you wanna just dance and not care. I also really love the switch up in the song too, it’s different and I love it!

Orange Juice- Melanie Martinez

I cried after seeing K-12 and the story that went along to this. I struggle so much to love myself, I have for years. The song itself talks a lot about an eating disorder, which is something a lot of people shy away from. I think what really did it for me was hearing the message at the end of the song in the movie. Crybaby, the character Melanie based this around, tells her new friend that she made that our bodies are just temporary and don’t define who we are. She goes on to explain that there’s more to us than just the surface beauty that our bodies have and that we should be more accepting and kinder to ourselves without having to hold our own image up to unrealistic standards. The best message she gives at the end is that “We all have to learn how to love ourselves without the approval of others.” This is followed by the friend saying that it’s hard to love yourself when people make you feel so shitty about who you are that you believe it yourself. 

Highlights from Kiki’s Delivery Service- Joe Hisaishi

I just love the music for this movie, it’s very relaxing to listen to. 

Since U Been Gone- Kelly Clarkson

This was the first song that I ever publically sang in middle school. We had a karaoke day in my music class and I got up to sing this in front of everyone who was there and after that, I never sang in front of anyone for years. 

Come Away With Me- Norah Jones

It’s just a beautiful song that helps me relax and unwind.  

(Sittin’ on) The Dock of the Bay- Sarah Bareilles

I really recommend the one from the live performance because it sounds so much better. I love how she sings this song and I love how it painted this really beautiful landscape image of sitting down near an ocean or a lake and just watching the water. It’s another song that really helps me relax. 

Sugar, We’re Goin Down- FOB

I remember first hearing this song when I was about 6 or7 in the car with my Mom on the radio in our silver little Ford car. I was living in Germany at the time and this was also my first time listening to something that was considered “rock” or “alternative.” Years later I remembered hearing it somewhere and finding out who sang it and listened to FOB’s other songs and quickly fell in love with them. They hold a very dear and special place in my heart and always will. 

Picks For my Parents:

La Isla Bonita- Madonna

My Mom loved listening to Madonna with me as a kid, it was almost all she would play. I’m sure she owned almost all her CDs, and it was also music I grew up with thanks to her. I picked this one because I love how it sounds and every time it comes on I’m reminded of those days when I was little and would listen to this with her. 

Underneath It All- No Doubt

Another song that I was introduced to by my Mom. She owns the CD that this song is on, I also have it downloaded on an old iPod touch because I love that album so much. No Doubt was another one of the alternative bands I was introduced to as a kid because of her. This song was also used in 50 First Dates, which is my favorite movie with Drew Barrymore and it’s my favorite Rom-Com. 

Wide Open Spaces- Dixie Chicks

My Mom and I both listened to them when I was younger in the car as well. She would play their music in the house sometimes and sing along to it and so would I. I’m not sure what happened to the CDs we had for them but I think at one point she owned the CD this song was on. the other reason this one still sticks with me is that when I hear this song, all I can think about is just being out taking pictures in the wide-open spaces where I’m free to just make mistakes and be my most authentic self. 

A Girl Like You- Edwyn Collins

A song I heard through the Charlie’s Angel movie that I watched with my Mom growing up. It’s also a song that my Dad really loves,. It just makes me smile when I hear it because it’s a good song, but also it reminds me a lot of my parents. 

Lucky- Britney Spears

Both my Mom and I are Britney fans. Her first official album with Hit Me Baby One More Time was the first album my Mom every bought me when I was younger and we lived in San Antonio. I remember that Britney was the reason I wanted to get my belly button pierced, I never could shut up about it even as a teenager. Specifically, this is a song my Mom loves by her that she always puts on when we’re out so it makes me really happy to hear this song and reminds me how lucky I really am to share stuff like this with her. 

One, Two Step- Ciara, Missy Elliot 

Growing up my brother would play a lot fo rap, hip-hop, and other stuff that my Mom and I grew to like and this was one of them. Mostly it was because of a family dog that we had a long time ago that loved my brother's music. 

Party in the U.S.A- Miley Cyrus

Almost everyone in my family loves this song. My brother was the more shocking one to hear it from. One day it came on and he told my Mom that it was his favorite song and we would always play it for him. Mind you, he’s about 3 years older than me, so you can imagine how surprised I was. 

Some Hearts- Carrie Underwood

I think I talked about this before, but Carrie Underwood was another artist I grew up listening to that my Mom loved a lot. I think Carnival Ride was either the 2nd or 3rd album my Mom bought me. The song this album is from really was amazing. The lyrics are just wholesome and it’s just a good country song. My Mom really loved this song and one of the more popular ones from the album. 

Hollaback Girl- Gwen Stephani 

This song taught me how to spell bananas and I don’t think that will ever leave me. I have to sing it too in order to remember the spelling too. It’s my Mom’s favorite song by Gwen Stephani, and she owns the CD for this too and I also have it on my little old iPod touch. I still go back and listen to this to hype myself up sometimes. 

Never Gonna Give You Up- Rick Astley 

This is gonna sound completely stupid why I picked this. My Dad, when he was younger and had hair, would get mistaken for this guy all the fucking time. He also loves the song too and while I’d love to tell all the amazing stories he’s told me about that I think I wanna just keep it to that. Get Rick Rolled. 

Living Dead Girl- Rob Zombie

Another artist my parents loved listening to, mostly my Mom, was Rob Zombie. As I got older I looked more into his work and watched a lot of his films. They’re really good too. This song specifically stuck out because I remember my parents listening to it all the time in the car with me. I don’t think I should have been listening to this as a kid but it was good music. 

Don’t Tread On Me- Metallica

The stories I could tell you that my Mom has told me about when she was younger. My Mom was really cool when she was younger, let’s put it that way. Metallica has been a band that she holds close to her because their music is so good and it’s also a song I grew up listening to in the car. 

You Give Love A Bad Name- Bon Jovi

My Dad has some really good taste in music, well both my parents do. This song is another one they both love and it just makes me really happy when I hear it. 

Love Shack- B52′s

I remember hearing this in a Joe’s Crabshack growing up and my Dad singing it. It was totally embarrassing for me, but now I just join him in doing it now because it’s more fun. This has to be his favorite song of all time and it’s just a really good dance song to just goof off too. 

Learnin’ the Blues- Frank Sinatra

My Dad loves Sinatra’s music. Every time I put on something by him he always sings along to it and it just gives me a warm fuzzy feeling.

Fly Me To The Moon (In Other Words)- Frank Sinatra, Count Basie

It’s the same as the one before this. Actually, to add on to this, when he heard me put on some of Sinatra’s music my Dad was shocked and asked me why I was listening to it and was even more surprised when I told him I just liked it and wanted something different to listen to and I found it through a Fallout game Radio station that someone made on Spotify.