#I hope the stumped joke is not that bad I tried my best I swear

[yukinabushido]

"Is the one armed, STUMPed?"

HEAR ME OUT:

Also I think "one armed" is the most non-original nickname I wrote in my life, if someone can suggest something better IT WOULD BE AMAZING PLZ I'M BEGGING

[maxinesgun]

Can you write about reader comforting Jacob

Nothing But Time | j.c

pairing: jacob custos x f!reader

contains: hurt/comfort, friends to lovers, jacob pining, mentions of blood, swearing, tending to jacob's injury, first kiss, a bit of angst, reader makes him nervousss

summary: you and jacob are hiding away together in one of the cabins after everything has gone to hell. an admission of what really happened to the van leads to an inadvertent confession of his feelings for you.

a/n: i thought this prompt paired well with an idea i already had, so i decided to combine them. hope you like! also i did not mean for it to turn out this long lol

word count: 2.7k

“Fuck. Shit. Fuck.” 

Needless to say, you were not great with blood.

And there was a lot of it.

Jacob released a long, slow breath through clenched teeth as he lowered himself down onto the bunk bed, taking care not to rest any weight on his injured leg. His brows were furrowed and all the hard lines of his body were tensed in pain, but he was handling this remarkably well, considering. You’d think you were the one who had stepped in a bear trap.

You were trying your best to think about what a rational person would do in this situation—not that the situation you were currently in was in any way normal. What did one do when being hunted by werewolves at a closed-down summer camp with no way to escape or call for help? You shook your head, determining that going down that road would send you into full-blown panic mode. Instead, you narrowed it down: What did one do when one’s friend had stepped in a bear trap?

“Bandages,” you said firmly, more to give yourself a clear goal to focus on than anything. “Okay, yes. I think there’s a first aid kit in here somewhere.” You felt Jacob’s gaze on you as you began kneeling down to grope blindly under each of the bunk beds. You guessed you must have looked somewhat frantic, judging by the way he was looking at you as if you’d just started speaking a different language.

“Okay, I’m getting the sense that you’re really freaked out right now, but really, I’m fine. It’s not that bad. Look, I can still bend my—ah, shit.”

“You’re sitting there with a bloody stump for a foot and you’re telling me not to freak out?” you scoffed as you ducked to peer under one of the last beds, practically pressing yourself to the floor. It was dark in here, and you tried not to think about all of the mouse droppings and spiderwebs your arm was probably brushing against. Right now, that was the absolute least of your worries. Eventually your hand knocked against something solid, and a rush of relief washed over you as you pulled out the small first aid kit. “Got it.”

“Hey, come on. I know it looks bad, but I still have a foot.” You could tell he was making an effort to sound like his usual self, light and joking, but his voice was strained, his breathing a bit heavy.

“Pretty soon you won’t, if it gets infected,” you pointed out as you returned to the bed he was on and crouched down in front of him with the kit, rifling through its contents.

“Okay, not helping.” He watched as you pulled out a roll of bandages and a tiny bottle of rubbing alcohol, a twinge of uncertainty flitting across his features. “You, uh, know what you’re doing with that?”

“No, not really,” you said, grimacing as you examined his ankle. It was caked in drying blood and dirt from when he’d had to race through the forest barefoot. You took a steadying breath, willing yourself to stay cool as you focused on ripping off a small piece of fabric from your already-torn shirt. “It’s not too complicated though, right? Clean the wound, then wrap it up. Easy. I took first aid once when I was like, fourteen.”

Jacob nodded, leaning an arm on the bedpost. He didn’t look too reassured. “Oh, great. See, that makes me feel a lot better.”

You shot him a sharp look, glancing up momentarily from where you were leaning over his leg. You found that his eyes had already been on you, and you thought you saw something in them soften as his lips quirked into a lopsided grin. “Sorry. Just kidding. You’re who I’d trust most with this kinda thing, anyway.”

“Really? Not Dylan?” you joked, using the bunched-up scrap of fabric to gently wipe around the wound as much as you could. When you placed a hand on his calf to hold him in place, you noticed the way he stiffened, went completely still, but you attributed it to him trying to brace against the pain.

He huffed a laugh, shaking his head a little. “You know what, scratch that. Definitely Dylan.”

You reached for the rubbing alcohol next, unscrewing it and holding him in place a little more firmly. You tried to keep from wincing at your next words, knowing it was about to hurt like hell. “Okay, now this might sting a bit.”

The bed creaked as he straightened up. “Wait, wait, wait, what are you—”

His words abruptly cut off with a grunt as you poured the alcohol over the wound. “Fuuuck,” he hissed out between clenched teeth, his eyes squeezed shut and his head falling against his chest.

“Sorry. It’s better if you’re not expecting it,” you said apologetically, glancing up at him with a weak half-smile. You set the bottle aside and began unraveling the roll of bandage, determined to work quickly. Who knew how much time you had here to hunker down in safety before one of those things burst through the window?

Jacob’s jaw was tensed, a muscle in it jumping as he let out a long breath, but he nodded, another attempt at nonchalance. “I’m good. Totally good. Barely felt a thing.”

The smile on your lips grew a bit at that as you began wrapping the bandage around his ankle, trying to make sure it was snug but not uncomfortably so. A silence fell in the space between you, and you suddenly became very aware of the strange intimacy of the moment—the fact that you were alone together, touching him so casually, the only light in the dim cabin the moonlight slanting across the floorboards.

You were sure he was watching you, and for some reason you were very determined not to look up as you finished wrapping him up, leaning in to tear the end of the roll off with your teeth. “There, I think you’re fine,” you said, glad to fill the silence. “It’s probably not the best, but…”

“Thanks,” he said quietly, and it sounded so sincere that your heart squeezed in your chest. He groaned as he looked down at his leg. “God, I’m screwed, aren’t I?” 

“Just be glad it was your foot and not that handsome face of yours. How would you get all the girls?” you grinned, attempting to lighten the mood as you tied the bandage off tightly. Your slightly shaky fingers made it a bit difficult, but you managed. 

You heard him breathe a laugh, but it sounded half-hearted, and when you glanced up at him, his smile didn’t quite reach his eyes. “Yeah. Right.” 

His eyes lingered on you for a few seconds, an expression in them you couldn’t quite place, and you cleared your throat, brushing off your scuffed jeans as you stood. The feeling in your stomach was one you were familiar with—a twisting, fluttering sensation that only happened when Jacob looked at you a certain way. One that you were used to shoving down, where it couldn’t be examined too closely.

Crossing your arms over your chest, you walked over to the window, hesitantly scanning what was visible of the grounds and the trees of the forest beyond. There was no movement; it was quiet, almost peaceful. In a way, it only made you more anxious. “I don’t know how long we’ll be able to stay in here,” you said, worrying your lip between your teeth. Your mind was racing with what your next move should be. “Maybe we should try to go find Nick and Abi, make sure they’re okay. Do you think they’d be at the lodge?”

A fresh wave of worry washed over you as you thought about your other friends and the fact that you didn’t know where they were right now, if they were safe. Would all of you make it out okay after all of this?

“I don’t—yeah, the lodge. Good idea,” Jacob said from behind you. After a moment you heard him let out a sigh, and you turned back to him. He looked distraught, his faraway gaze focused on the floor in front of him. He didn’t seem to notice you staring at him as he ran a hand through his hair, the movement a bit agitated. “God, I can’t believe…” he trailed off, and he gave a small shake of his head. “This is all my fault.”

The words were muttered, as if meant more for himself than for you. You frowned in confusion, studying his face. You’d never seen him look so serious. “What? What do you mean, your fault?” 

“All of this. It’s only happening because… because of me.” He rubbed a hand over his jaw, seeming to contemplate something, and finally looked up at you. “I messed with the van.”

It took several seconds for you to process what he’d said, the implications dawning on you much slower than they should have. “Jacob…” you started, but you didn’t know what to say. It felt like your thoughts were wading through sludge.

“I messed with the van,” he repeated, the words rushing out of him. “That’s why it won’t start. It was stupid, and I didn’t know all of this shit would happen, but it did, and if anything happens to you, or—or anyone, I…”

Your mouth opened, closed. You stared at him in shock for a long moment, taking in his pleading expression as the previous events of the evening replayed in your head. Of course. It hadn’t made sense that the van had just stopped working all of a sudden. 

You rubbed a hand over your eyes, a slightly hysterical laugh bubbling out of your chest at the sheer absurdity of your current situation. What even was this night? You’d think you were dreaming, if you hadn’t known any better. “What the fuck, Jacob? Why?”

“I just needed—” he let out a breath, looking away from you. “I just needed more time. We’ll be going off to college after this, and it won’t be the same, y'know? I didn’t get a chance to tell you—” he cut himself off, looking frustrated with himself.

You stared at him, your arms dropping to your sides. What was he trying to say? “A chance to tell me what?” you asked uncertainly, swallowing against your dry throat. His eyes met yours for a few beats, and you felt like you could see the unspoken words in them, understood all at once.

To say you hadn’t considered anything more than friendship with Jacob would be an outright lie, and an unconvincing one, at that. Of course you had—you’d formed quite a bond since the very first week of summer, had grown fond of his dumb jokes and the way he teased you constantly, which quickly became a comfortable back-and-forth between you that came so naturally you hadn’t remembered it being any other way. 

And he was attractive, of course. No one could deny that.

“I don’t…” Your voice was faint even to your own ears, barely a murmur. It was all you could muster.

“That I like you,” he said simply, as if he couldn’t hold the words back any longer. “That’s what I wanted to tell you.”

You still hadn’t regained the ability to speak; your gaze flitted about the room as if searching for what to say before landing back on him, on his brown eyes, watching you with a softness and a hint of sadness that made your heart twist in your chest. 

You opened your mouth to speak, not particularly knowing what would come out, but he raised a hand to stop you, seeing the expression on your face. “You don’t have to say anything.”

Another silence fell after that, one in which your mind was reeling with the new reality that you had just been hit over the head with. Jacob, having feelings for you? For how long? And why hadn’t he told you earlier, at any other time prior to being in a life-or-death scenario like this one? After a few minutes—or maybe ten, you didn’t know—you pushed off the wall and slowly ambled over to sit beside him on the bed, where he was staring down at the injured leg you had just bandaged up.

“Ah, fuck—it wasn’t supposed to go like this,” he groaned, running a hand through his hair again. Your eyes swept over his face, lingering on the line of his strong jaw, on his soft-looking hair. “It was gonna be at the lake, or—or the campfire, y'know, once we were alone. And I would’ve had some liquid courage in me, so I didn’t sound like as much of a nervous idiot, and it would’ve just been chill—”

“Jacob—”

“—but then all this fucked up shit happened, and we all might be dead after tonight because of some dumbass romantic-comedy fantasy I had in my head—"

“It’s not your—”

“—like everything was just going to work out perfectly. Like one more night was going to change anything—”

“—Jacob. Look at me.”

The firmness in your tone made him snap out of his rambling, and when he finally turned to look at you, you didn’t allow yourself time to think twice. You took his face in your hands and kissed him.

That shut him up.

He went rigid for just a moment, but then you felt him melt into the kiss, leaning into you as his big hand came to rest on your thigh. It wasn’t a gentle kiss, nor an urgent one; it was deep, purposeful, as if a culmination of all the brief looks, small touches, and hidden thoughts that had passed between you. He kissed you as if it was just another summer night, as if you had all the time in the world in this cabin, and a warmth you hadn’t felt before spread through you as you marveled at how soft his lips felt against your own.

You broke the kiss, drawing back for breath, and you saw his gaze rove your face before falling back to your parted lips. “Wow,” he breathed after a long pause, for once looking as though he was at a loss for words.

“You didn’t have to wait all summer to do that,” you said, smiling softly, “just so you know.” You realized then that you were still holding his face, and slowly leaned away, letting your hands fall back into your lap.

“Huh.” He managed to tear his eyes away from your mouth to meet your stare, but when you bit your bottom lip, a habit of yours, you saw them flick back down once or twice. His hand hadn’t moved from your leg, and you were glad; it was warm and steadying. “Well, now I feel twice as stupid.”

You breathed a laugh, but shook your head slightly, looking at him earnestly. “Listen. None of this is your fault.” 

He let out a breath, barely a sigh. “If I hadn’t—”

“—you didn’t know this would happen. You couldn’t have known,” you told him firmly. You rested your hand over his on your thigh, a spark of electricity shooting up your arm at the simple touch. “Any one of us could have made the same mistake.”

“I just… I’m sorry,” he said quietly, and though you didn’t want the apology, you nodded, knowing he felt like he needed to say it. You could see the pain in his eyes, the self-blame, and it made something ache inside you. 

“We’re going to be fine,” you said, your grip on his hand tightening. Maybe you were trying to convince yourself of it just as much as him. “We’re all going to be fine.” You offered him a tiny, encouraging grin, needing things to not feel so serious right now. When he returned it, the corner of his lips quirking up in the ghost of his usual wide grin, you told yourself that it was just the beginning of… whatever this was. You weren’t going to think about the future right now, about everything that came after. For the moment, you were just glad to do this alongside him.

After all, once all of this was over, you’d have nothing but time.

[godofplumsandthunder]

Twisted Fate

Pairing: Bucky Barnes x Reader

Warnings: Cancer, both Bucky and reader have cancer, Major Character death, brief hospital terms mainly reffering to cancer treatment. References to amputation.

A/N: This was written for the lovely @eurynome827​ 2k celebration. I got a lovely quote of lyrics from Hadestown, which I wanted to do something that was based off of the musical, but I couldn’t figure anything out. Then I had a big anniversary come up and this was came out instead. It’s very angsty, I cried a lot, and well I hope you like it.

The low, steady hum of the fan fills the awkward silence. The psychiatrist, newly assigned to the case, still doesn’t feel comfortable. “Case number 32557038” was widely known in the health care center. The whispers and rumors floated their way down the hall, past the copy machine, filling the office with this chilling tale. Some regarded it as a terrible series of bad luck, others thought it was an act of some benevolent God, pouring his rage on this poor couple. Dr. Breynord, after reading the notes on the file, Breynord knew that this case was perhaps the worst case of bad luck she ever saw in her career, and, maybe it was her stubbornness or naive belief in medicine, but Dr. Breynord was going to help this poor man get the peace he so desperately needs.

“James,” Dr. Breynord’s voice breaks the silence of the office, “I’ve read what my colleagues had to say about your case, but, I’d like you to tell me what has happened if you feel comfortable.”

Shifting in his seat, James sighs, with a small nod of the head, he starts at the beginning.

Bucky Barnes was used to change. Granted, it was other people’s change, but it was still change nonetheless. The poor folks that sat next to him each clinic visit changed, his caretakers changed, it seemed as if the whole world changed around him, while he was stuck in some perpetual hell. Every day dragged out in the same dull, and nauseating feeling, and at times, Bucky felt he was in an endless loop, forsaken by some deity he didn’t believe in. But, for however long Bucky has left in this fallen and cruel world, he’ll remember when you walked in, shattering the miserable purgatory he was banished to, he’ll always remember the day you changed his life.

It happened during his first transfusion session after his surgery. His arm, still wrapped in bandage, IV tubing leading straight to his heart, pumped his body full of liquids, as he waited for the toxic poison to enter his body. He always found it ironic, the “medicine” that was supposed to save his life, that was too dangerous for the nurses to touch with their bare hands, was willingly flushed into his body. Hair loss, mouth sores, and muscle aches were the better side effects. He can’t help but think about what is coming, especially as he sees his nurse, Thor, come over with the freshly made batch of poison [STRIKE THROUGH], chemotherapy as his doctor would want him to call it. Hanging the bag on his IV pole, Thor looks over at Bucky, giving him the “I’m going to go on a rant about something you should care about” look. 

“Now James, we’re getting a new patient today. It’s their first transfusion. They’re going to be sitting in the pod next to you. I swear to the gods, I best not hear another complaint about your attitude.”

“Me? An attitude? No, I think you got me confused with someone else. I’m the brightest little ball of sunshine here!” Bucky can’t help but chuckle. It’s not his fault he wasn’t a “warrior”, blasting “Fight Song” 24/7, as he sips on a kale smoothie with coffee suppositories shoved up his ass. T

“Yeah, yeah, yeah, Barnes,” Thor shakes his head as he cleans up his station, “don’t think I won’t throw your bald ass out of here. That cancer sob story, won’t work on me.” 

Bucky goes back to his phone, already feeling the effects of the chemo. No matter how many anti-nausea meds they fed him, Cisplatin always makes him sick. So, he had the right to act like a grumpy old grandpa. While he scrolls through his social media feed, seeing all the accomplishments, brags, and just shit of his friends, Bucky hears your sniffles, as you make your way down to the end of the Oncology clinic, taking a seat next to Bucky. Even if Thor hadn’t given him the heads up, he would have known you were fresh meat. One infusion, his mom asked him how he could tell. It was easy for Bucky, it all had to do with the eyes. A cancer diagnosis shatters you. It kills all hope, light, and goodness that’s in you. You turn completely numb to the world, to the point where your own wailing and sobs feel muted. Bucky saw all of that in your eyes. Behind the puffy, redness, saw the shards of hope, the fear of the unknown. Before you could reach your seat, you stumble, spilling your possessions that you carried all over the floor. Bucky watches quietly as you quickly pick up your items, collapsing into the chair next to him. 

“Sorry I couldn’t give you a hand, only have the one,” he wiggles his stump, and he's met with silence. Talk about a rough crowd, he thinks, his nephews love his stumpy jokes. “So,” Bucky continues, “what are you in for? I’m a sarcoma, in the arm.” You sniffle as you turn your body to look at this new man.

“Leukemia,” you confess, voice barely above a whisper. It takes a real effort to say it out loud because then it makes all of this real.

“That’s good then,” the “sarcoma” man says to you, and Bucky can see the confusion, and pain on your face.

“How is that good? How is cancer good?”

Using his arm, Bucky points around the room, giving you a tour of the room.

“See him, that’s Riley, he has an inoperable brain tumor. That young kid, with the Switch? His name is Peter, his body is chemo resistant. So yeah, leukemia is good. If you haven’t learned it yet, not all cancers are made equal.”

“Oh,” you barely make out. What were you supposed to say to that? 

=====

Much to Bucky’s surprise, he actually enjoyed having your company. Your treatments lined up and so you both got to know each other well. Bucky enjoyed having someone close to his age that understood his problems. And it also didn’t hurt that you had such a great personality, you got Bucky’s dark humor (and it went without saying that you understood it was his way of coping), and you looked great. Not many people can rock a bald head. And Bucky has seen his fair share, and he can say with confidence, you rocked it. Not covering it up with caps, scarves, or wigs. Because why should you hide away? For the first time since his diagnosis, Bucky had a purpose. So, while his immune system allowed him to leave the house, he picked up a bouquet of fake flowers (neutropenia life, am I right?) and a box of chocolates to take with him to the next transfusion. When he got to the clinic, Bucky was a bit worried to see that you weren’t next to him. Instead, there sat Barb, 75 years old with breast cancer. 

“Oh sweetie, are those for me?” Barb looks at the flowers in Bucky’s hand. 

“No!” He snaps, as closes the curtain that surrounds his chair. He hears some huffs and complaints from Barb, but frankly, he doesn’t give a damn. Bucky only has one thing on his mind: you. 

“Are you alright? You’re not here at Club Med” Bucky texts as quickly as his one hand would let him. Dropping his phone, Bucky stares at it all while the nurses prep him. And because of damn, HIPAA, none of the nurses can tell him where you’re at. Minutes turn into hours, and by the time Bucky’s infusion ends, you still haven’t responded to him or shown up at the clinic. 

“Hope you’re okay. Call or text me. I'm worried” Bucky sighs, realizing how much you made his chemo treatments more bearable. How your laugh could make him forget of the poison he had to take, or how the light in your eyes could make him forget, even just for a bit, how much his arm stump was hurting. You were a drug, more potent than any he’s had before, and Bucky was becoming addicted. He’s picking at the hamburger he got for dinner, not having much of an appetite when his phone goes off. Seeing it’s from you, he rushes to answer. 

“Y/N! I… Where were you? I missed you today. I had to sit by Barb and…” The sounds of your cries cut Bucky off. 

“Are you okay?”

“No, Buck. I… Got some bad news today.” 

“Where are you?” He asks. He knows you’re alone, and speaking from experience, you never want to be alone when you get bad news. He knows from experience.

“Buck…” you sigh, “It’s fine. Really.” 

“Please, Y/N, I know what it’s like to be alone after getting this kind of news. Please, let me be there for you.” Breaking further down into tears, you cry at Bucky’s actions, actions of love. 

“I’ll send you my address,” Bucky gathers the flowers and chocolates as he rushes to your apartment, breaking a few traffic laws to get there faster. When he gets there, the image of you, opening the door, eyes swollen from crying breaks his heart. 

“Oh, Y/N,” Bucky sweeps you into his arm, as he closes the door behind, “tell me what’s going on hun.” 

You both sit on the couch, the bag with the flowers and chocolate lay at your feet, as you stay in Bucky’s embrace. 

“I’m… I’m dying Buck!” You manage to say in-between odds. “Dr. Fair... gave me three months to live. There’s nothing else they can do.” You break down in his arms, that last straw finally breaking, as you tell your newfound best friend, the person you were supposed to beat cancer with. Bucky tries his best to remain strong, to be the rock, the foundation you need, but you’re not the only one that is losing a friend. You sit in each other's embrace, as you mourn. You cry for all the missed opportunities, laughs, and memories that won’t be made. 

“What am I going to do,” you whisper, your voice hoarse from crying. 

Kissing your head, Bucky pulls you in closer, “we, are going to make these three months, the best three months you’ve ever had.”

Bucky lives up to his promise, spending every hour he isn’t in the hospital with you. The time you spent together changed your relationship. Neither had to officially say the words to make your relationship official. It was just you, and Bucky. Holding each other close, as the tempest waged on, trying to beat you into submission. You go on walks in the park, picnics, and one night when you both had the energy, went skinny dipping. Your logic being, what are the cops going to do? Arrest two cancer patients, with one of them being terminal? You threw caution to the wind and simply lived. Lived, breathed, and loved. Things seemed to be perfect until reality hit.

Your body wasn’t keeping up. Your cancer was spreading faster than they predicted. The doctors couldn’t give you an explanation as to why the cancer was spreading so fast. It shouldn’t have been. Soon, home hospice came, to try to make you more comfortable. And like the good partner he was, Bucky spent every minute by your side. That’s why, when you felt the inevitable coming, you felt your body give in to the tiredness of fighting, you grab Bucky’s hand. 

“I love you, James Bucky Barnes,” you weakly say, giving him one last affirmation, as you went to sleep, for one last time. 

As Bucky wakes up from his nap, feeling your cold body, he tries to ruse you back awake. Once he realizes what has happened, the last bit of humanity inside of Bucky snapped. He lets out a blood-curdling scream, as tears stream down his face. He strikes your face, pleas escape his mouth. Pleas to you, to a God he has long stopped believing in. His body shakes, his tears wetting your hair, as he holds you for one last time. 

=====

“Oh James,” Dr. Breynord grabs herself a tissue before handing Bucky the box of tissues. “I truly am so sorry to hear that. I want you to know that I am here to help you get happy again, and to heal.”

Bucky sighs and turns away from the doctor as he wipes his eyes. “You’re just like the rest of them. You didn’t listen to me.” 

Breynord was surprised that this was Bucky’s complaint. The other doctors had warned her that Bucky could be sarcastic, standoff-ish, and even flat-out rude to them. Breynord thought she did a good job listening to his story, what did she miss.

“I… I don’t think I understand what you mean, James.”

Bucky lets out a heartless, empty laugh, “you want me to be happy again. I’m never going to be. Not only do I have to live with the guilt of surviving, when she died, in my arms, but I’ll also never find another soul like hers. We had a connection, you know. It felt like we met before. When I held her in my arm, and her arms would wrap around me, it felt like I had the whole world in my arms. I didn’t need anything else when I had Y/N.” 

“So tell me doc, what’s the point of carrying on?”

[catzula]

A deal with the devil.

Warnings: Swearing, its 4,5k words (I'm sorry someone teach me how to write something smaller than at least 2k)

Pairing: Bakugou x fem!reader

Genre: pure fluff

A/N: I have one more Bakugou fic after this cuz if it’s not apparent enough I’m a baku simp, but after that I have one shinsou and todoroki ask so bear with me and my simping a lil longer pls, what else, uhhh, enjoy!

Synopsis: you want to learn to ride a motorcycle and Bakugou is the only one that can teach you. And if you thought convincing him to teach you was hard, you'll see it's worse when he's actually teaching you.

"I want to learn how to ride a motorcycle." These were the words that caused everyone in the room to stop whatever they were doing and stare at you.

"What?" You asked, feeling uneasy under the stern gazes of your friends. "Why is everyone staring at me?"

"We're just waiting for you to tell us it was a joke," Mina answered your question, chuckling awkwardly as the girls shook their heads in unison. You gasped dramatically, shocked at how little they trusted you. "I'm not joking, I'm serious!"

This led to another awkward silence, and it was Mina, once again, who broke the silence. You were hoping for at least a few encouraging sentences -something along the lines of you go girl!- but rolled your eyes at her when she said, "Sweetie, are you sure?"

"Oh my God!" You groaned. "Of course I'm sure. Why isn't anyone supporting me?" You looked at your friends expectedly, but their expression didn't change.

"Oh, it's not that we're not supporting you- we're just worried and don't think... You should be doing it." Momo said with a cute smile, probably hoping you to smile back and drop the subject, but you pouted. "Momo, that's exactly what not supporting means."

"Y/N, you know we love you and will support you at everything,” Ochako stated, but before you could even smile she added, “but, we're concerned. You know you're kind of... a little too clumsy.” Girls nodded as she carried on. “Actually, you're the clumsiest person I know!" She had one of her pretty, cute smiles on her face as she said the last sentence, and you almost wanted to laugh at how her upbeat attitude while calling you clumsy made an interesting contrast.

You scoffed. "Oh, come on. I'm not that clumsy."

"Oh, but you are." Mina stated, "you're not only clumsy, but you're also really... How do I say this-" she snapped her fingers as she remembered the word she was looking for, "unfocused, and you literally have no idea whats your left or right is." She muttered the last sentence and the girls giggled.

"What?!" Your face scrunched with confusion and at the insult you didn't even understand. "What does that even mean?" Yeah, what did that mean? Yeah, you did daydream quite a lot, and zoned out almost constantly, a little too much to tell the truth too, and though you did know your lef and right, you kinda did just mix them once in a while-

"Ooh." You said, understanding why they were so worried, and what they meant. You had to give them credit, you riding a motorcycle wasn't safe...  But still. You wanted to learn, and nothing could make you go back from your decision.

"Yeah, I see your point, but still. I want to do this, and I'll ask Kiri to teach me. I know he rides a motorcycle, and he's pretty good at it too! I'm pretty sure he can deal with my- whatever it is I have."

Your friends shot you a worried look, but they were familiar with your stubborn personality and knew you would do whatever it takes to learn it.

You stood up to find Kirishima as you rehearsed your speech in your mind. You were so lost in your thoughts that you didn't even realize the door was closed, and you walked right into it. "Oh, fuck." You mumbled under your breath, trying to ignore your friend's giggles.

As you walked out of the room, you kind of understood what unfocused meant.

~~~

"Kirishima, please!" You whined, you felt a weird urge to stump your feet on the floor like a little kid but kept yourself from doing so.

"I'm sorry Y/N, but I haven't been riding it long enough to teach anyone. Especially not you."

You gasped in an (overly exaggerated) shocked way. "Shoot me, it'll surely hurt less." You were trying to make him feel a little guilty, but you knew he was right. "I'm sorry, I really am!” He said, feeling bad when you looked at him like he just slapped you. “But uhh, you could try your chance with Baku? He was the one who taught me too, after all."

"Yeah, like Bakugou's ever gonna accept to teach me. Not even you would teach me, one of the nicest guys I know, let alone him!"

"Eh," he said with a toothy grin, you saw his cheeks reddening ever so slightly. "Shoot your shot. Maybe if you catch him in a good mood, you can convince him."

You pouted. Did Bakugou even have a good mood? Well, he did actually, but only when he beat the shit out of Izuku in training lessons. Other than that, he rarely even smiled.

"Yeah, I guess I'm gonna ask him. Thanks for your help, though." You said, half sarcastically but he didn't catch it. "Yeah, no problem!"

You exhaled the breath you didn't even realize you were holding. You weren't only hesitant because of, well, Bakugou being himself, but also because you had the biggest crush on him.

It was weird, really. You hated that you had a crush on Bakugou, and by doing so, you hated him too, but even that didn't prevent you from having a crush on him.

But you knew how he was the worst type of person to have a crush on, and you also knew he didn't even like you the slightest, the moment you met. So you decided it was the best to stay as far as you could from him and acted like you weren't, well, amazed by him.

He didn't make it hard either, and you didn't even know why you liked him so damn much. But you did, you were just thanking God Bakugou was such an insufferable person, so it was easy to hide your feelings as you could act like you couldn't stand him.

You realized you were in front of his dorm room, and you panicked since you didn't even plan what you were going to say, but you thought it would be better to just go with the flow this time. You gathered up your courage and knocked on the door. When the door opened, you thought you were going to go deaf from how loud your hard was beating. The door opened, and your gaze met the crimson eyes. You opened your mouth to say something as a little smile tugged on your lips-

The door shut in your face.

"Who was it?" You heard Denki's voice from the other side of the door. Bakugo tch'd as he answered, "Some extra I don't have time for." You couldn't say that didn't hurt, but you proceeded anyway. "Hey Denki, it's me, (Y/N)!"

You heard some shuffling voices coming from the room as you heard Bakugou's harsh voice. "If you open the God damn door, I'll blast you in-" The door opened as you saw Denki, the biggest smile on his face. "(Y/N)! Just the person I wanted to see."

He pulled you in a tight hug and hugged you even tighter when you tried to get away from him. "Get a fucking room. I don't care which one, but just stay away from mine." He mumbled as Denki snorted.  It was obvious they were studying, and you felt bad for interrupting it.

"Bakugou, you don't have to be jealous." His eyes widened as he growled frighteningly. "WHO THE FUCK ARE YOU-"

"Anyways, why are you here?" Denki asked to you, ignoring the fuming guy behind him. You were sure ignoring Bakugou was not the right thing to do, but you went along with it. "Oh, I just have to ask Bakugou a... Favor." You eyed him for a second. Was he in a good mood? You didn't even notice Denki exiting the room, leaving you two alone.

"What the fuck do you want?"

Probably not. But no going back now, you told yourself.

"I- I, have a favor to ask you." You said without meeting his gaze.

"No." One word made your head snap up, your eyes looking at his, now almost as angry as him. "What?! You didn't even hear what I have to say!"

He shrugged. "I said no. I don't do favors, nor do I have time for you, or whatever it is you want." He leaned up and was about to exit his room, but you gathered your courage, the words leaving your mouth almost in an angry tone. "I want to learn how to ride a motorcycle!"

His legs froze in their place as his body turned to you, his red eyes now angrier than ever. You didn't know why he was angry, but again, he was always angry. "You wanna what now?"

"I want to learn to ride a motorcycle." You said, this time a little calmer. "No." The word found its way out of his mouth once again.

"Oh my God, Bakugou, can't you at least think about it?" You stood up, now facing him. His shoulders so broad, muscles so defined, his face so- no, no, no, you had to concentrate.

"I thought about it, and my answer is no. What even made you think I would teach you?" Well, you had to give him credit, it was near impossible to convince him to do anything for anyone, but for desperate situations, you had to take desperate measures.

"Bakugou-" you said, your anger had disappeared, leaving it's place to sadness, desperation, and humiliation. His eyes a little surprised to see you so calm all of a sudden, you bit your lip as you forced yourself to beg him."Please... Please teach me, because no one else can! I- I'm begging-"

"Shut up." He said without letting you finish your sentence, and you couldn't help but feel relieved, you couldn't bear the thought of literally begging him, and once did his anger help you.

"Why would I do it? What could you offer me back?"

Now that was something that didn't even cross your mind, well on your defense, you didn't even think you would come this far! So you acted without thinking.

"Anything you want!" You realized your mistake almost the second you said the words, but you couldn't go back now. The smirk on his face made you feel uneasy.

"Now that's a deal." He said, his smirk still lingering on his face. "Come here tomorrow at 5 pm. One minute late and the deal is off."

"And Bakugou?" You said a little nervously. "What do you want back?"

This time his smirk made you feel straight-up terrified. "I'll hold on to it for a while, I'll let you know when I decide what I want."

Damn, this was a bad idea, wasn't it? He wasn't a predictable person, and now you gave him this power, the kind of power you would feel afraid giving to anyone, let alone to Bakugou. He knew you, knew how much you valued promises, knew you would go drastic measures to hold a promise you made. So now he could even make you murder Midoriya, though you doubted it, you were sure he would rather kill the green-haired boy with his own bare hands. But still, he could make you do anything.

***

"You know you're the last person on earth that should be learning how to ride a motorcycle." He said as he looked at you angrily. "If you continue to zone out like that, I'm not letting you get on the motorcycle."

For the last 30 minutes or so, he was talking about each part of the motorcycle, and it was only normal for you to zone out, he was your crush for God's sake, and this was all so boring. "Okay, I'm sorry. Can we just... Ride it now? I'm sure I'll understand it better while I'm on it."

"What kind of stupid logic is that?" He said but stood up nevertheless. Your eyebrows furrowed when he sat on the bike and turned the engine. "What are you doing?"

"Did you think I would let you get on it alone? You're sitting behind my back first." That sentence shouldn't have made your heart beat faster, your cheeks redder, but it did anyway.

You sat on the engine, the motor roaring under you, making you feel excited, the caramel and spicy smell coming from the man in front of you taking your breath away, making you imagine things you shouldn't. Your hands rested shyly on his shoulders, his spiky hair, surprisingly soft, touching your hand.

"Hold on to me like that, and you'll be on the ground the second we leave." He said, and you had to bring your head closer to him to hear what he said, your lips almost touching his cheeks. When you didn't move, he rolled his eyes and wrapped your arms to his waist, making your heart beat even faster. You could feel his abs underneath your hands, which made your cheeks burn, and you were so grateful he couldn't see you right now.

Without even telling you he started the engine, you almost slid on the asphalt, which made your hands grip him tighter, your whole body leaning on his. "There's nothing to be afraid, dumbass." He said, feeling your tight grip.

It took you a few seconds to get used to it. It was an incredible feeling to go this fast, feeling the wind and smelling everything around you. You still tightened your grip on him every time he took a turn, but he was riding it so smoothly, you felt... Safe.

You always felt safe around him, anyway.

Without even realizing what you were doing, you leaned your chin on his shoulder, his hair tickling your face, the smell of caramel making you dizzy and you tried to etch this moment in your mind, knowing you probably won't get a chance to be this close to him ever again.

When the engine died beneath your legs, you felt a bit sad because it ended but smiled nevertheless. "That was amazing."

His chest puffed with pride, and a smirk found its place on his face. "What'd you expect?"

"Death, if we're being honest here." You said, which made his eyes narrow.

"So, my turn?"

***

“I said left!” He screamed. “This is the third fucking time you mixed your left and right! How can you even do that?” He had screamed so much, you were worried about his voice. “I just mix them, okay?!” You answered, making him even angrier.

Having Bakugou as a teacher was hard. But then again, having you as a student was probably harder.

Everyone who told you that you weren't focused enough was right. You did zone out a lot, even -and especially- while riding, which ended with you almost dying more than you could count. But Bakugou could count, and boy was he pissed.

Once when you took the sharpest turn because you zoned out and almost tossed in the wall, you knew Bakugou was going to kill you, if you didn't kill yourself first, of course. Apparently, he was thinking the same thing.

"Oi! If you have a death wish, tell it to me beforehand, and I will do it for you!" He practically screamed, his red eyes now bright with anger resembling flames.

"I'm sorry I just-"

"Don't fucking apologize! Focus!" But how could you focus when he was this close to you, looking deep in your eyes and damn did he smell good. "Yeah, sorry." You mumbled.

"One more time and I'm done with this shit." He threatened before getting away from you. "Yes, sir!" You joked, but he rolled his eyes, probably begging God to save him from you. "Look, while taking turns, use your lower half. You have to bend your hip the way you're turning so it will turn smoothly."

His eyes may have lingered on your hip a little longer than necessary.

A few hours full of almost- deaths and heart attacks past, and both of you were tired. The sun was setting, and you felt hungry, you were pretty sure he was also starving.

"So um, thanks for today. I'm kind of tired, but would you like to eat or something? There's a noodle place close enough and-"

"No." Ugh, he loved that word, didn't he?

He wore his helmet, getting ready to go back to the dorms. When you were in front of him he put your helmet on your head, his touch surprisingly soft and light.

"Thanks."

"Shut it." A long, awkward silence lingered in the air as he sat on the motorcycle. "Now, where's this noodle place?"

You couldn't hold your smile in.

~~~

It was a smooth ride, you noticed how his hips moved every time he took a turn, his body moving as if he was a part of the engine. The setting sun painted everything in red and orange tones, and it was so pretty that it took your breath away.

When you were in front of the noodle place you climbed off the motorcycle, but your legs were so shaky you couldn't find your balance and would have fallen on your knees if Bakugou hadn't hold you.

"Tch, can't even stand on your legs?"

You stuck your tongue out, acting like a child, but you didn't care. You were just happy he tagged along with you to eat.

You found a booth, he was sitting across you with a look on his face you couldn't quite understand but chose not to say anything. The whole meal he was so quiet it made you worry a little, at the very least, he was the loudest person you knew and him staying so quiet for such a long time was against his character.

When you both finished your meals and got ready to go back to your dorms, the silence went on, but you just couldn't bring yourself to ask that one question that was occupying your mind. Are we going to do this again? It wouldn't be a shock if he called quits after today. 

It was only until you came back to the dorms he broke the silence. It was such a stressful ride for you that you couldn't even enjoy the chilly night and the caramel scent coming from him. 

He looked at you as he shook his motorcycle gears off of him. "The noodles were okay, I guess." 

Your eyes widened as a giggle bubbled in your chest. So that was what he wanted to say first? You couldn't help but snort, earning a glare from him. "What the fuck is so funny?!" His anger seemed to fuel your laughs even more since you felt like your tummy was going to explode from laughing so hard. "I'm sorry- It's just..." You couldn't even talk and he finally tch'd. "Whatever, just shut up already."

"Okay,” you said, breathing deeply, “I'm good now." He didn’t say anything so you felt obligated to break the silence. "So, thanks for today- for everything. For actually bearing me and taking me as a pupil takes the first place, though." You said jokingly, and he rolled his eyes. "You're not that bad of a student I guess." You gasped as an answer to that. "The Bakugou Katsuki complimenting me? I must've died sometime today." 

He rolled his eyes once again -either he had a serious eye problem you didn't know of, or he just couldn't stand you- but this seemed like it was his 100th time today. "Yeah, yeah, whatever. Don't get used to it, dumbass. You won't be hearing any more of them the other lessons."

"Wh- What do you mean by the other lessons?" With this, his crimson eyes snapped up, looking at you with an unreadable expression. "Are you that dumb that you thought one lesson was enough? Or is it that you can't stand me so much that you would rather not ride a motorbike?" He tried to hide his hurt by looking mad, but you saw it either way.

"No! I would love you to teach me more! I just thought you would've just given up after... today. I know I'm not a good student, and you don't have time for- what was it again?" You snapped your fingers. "Extras."

He ignored your remark, he was looking at your face like he was searching for something but looked away when he saw you looking at him too. "I don't do anything half-assed. Even if you're a bad fucking student, if I told you I'll teach you, I'll fucking teach you."

That was an odd way to motivate someone, you thought, but it worked anyway. So you smiled at him and went back to your dorm, without even realizing the effect your smile had left on the angry boy.

***

You had to admit, it was a long week. Meeting with Bakugou every day after school, learning a new skill was harder than you had thought, but you secretly wished for it to never end, either.

"Can you focus for like three seconds?" An angry voice fumed behind you. "What are you thinking about anyway? This much dreaming is not healthy, you know." You decided that telling him that you were thinking about him wasn't a good idea, so you just smiled. He had brought water for the two of you, and you accepted it gladly. You hadn't even realized how late it was until then. 

The sky was a dark purple, the stars were shining brighter than ever. When Bakugou saw you looking at the sky, he scoffed. "It's getting late, wanna go back?" You shrugged, though you didn't want to go back the slightest. When you didn't say anything, he opened his water bottle.

You couldn't stop yourself from watching him drink the water -rather aggressively, too- how his adam's apple moved, his eyes fluttering with the feeling of the cold liquid going down his throat. You gulped at the sight, feeling your cheeks warming, and you drank the cold water in one go, to at least get rid of the warm feeling that was growing in your chest. 

You were so focused on the task of figuring out what the hell was this tingling sensation that went through your body every time he touched you, or why your heart beat faster he smiled so subtly, you didn't even realize Bakugou was watching you too, thinking the same thing as you.

Bakugou crushed the plastic water bottle in his hand, making you flinch with the sound, and once again focus your eyes on him. You didn't understand why he was angry now, but you stopped trying to do so after the first day. You were about to ask him what was wrong but stopped when you heard Kaminari's voice. 

He had a cheeky grin on his face as he walked towards you. "Hey, Y/n!" You smiled back, relief washing over you. "Hey, Denki! What's up?"

He shrugged. "Nothing, kinda missed you this past week, and when I saw you guys here, wanted to come and say hi." You could feel Bakugou getting angrier with every passing second, but you decided not to notice. "Oh, I missed you too." You answered when you heard Bakugou scoff, which caused Denki to giggle. "I guess I'll see you at the dorms tonight, it's getting late, though." He said as he started to walk away. 

You shrugged, staying up late with Denki was what caused you to have a non-existing sleep schedule. "Sure." You answered before turning your back at him and facing the now angrier than ever Bakugou. "So, you and Dunce face, huh? You guys a thing?"

It took you a second or two to understand what he meant, but when you did, your eyes widened, cheeks now beat red. "Oh, fuck no!" You exclaimed without thinking. His eyes widened at the curse that found it's way out of your mouth, and you thought this couldn't get any worse. "I- I mean, I love Denki, just not that way- and I got surprised when you..."

You stopped talking when you saw a smile on his face, which grew and grew until it was a full-on laugh. It was the weirdest thing, hearing Bakugou laugh. But as you watched him -in awe- as he laughed, you couldn't stop yourself from thinking that he should laugh more. It just suited him so much, how his body bent forward a little as he laughed, his eyes narrowing and almost hiding the bright red orbs. 

"That was the best fucking thing ever." He said after he calmed a little. You had started to laugh with him too, though you didn't think anything was funny, you just couldn't help yourself from laughing when he laughed. 

His eyes found yours, and you shared a look that lasted longer than it was supposed to. 

"Bakugou I-"

"Y/N, about the-" 

You both had talked at the same time, making you giggle. "You first." You said, and he snorted. "Of course me first." Okay then. "Remember the promise you made? About doing anything in return for me to teach you to ride a motorcycle?" 

You fidgeted, feeling uncomfortable with the topic. "We did have that deal, yes." He laughed at your reaction, his crimson eyes softer than you had ever seen him. You didn't know what was causing your heart to beat so fast, was it the dark sky creating a weird, romantic aura, or was it his eyes looking at you that way?

"Then I want you to do something." Why was he looking at you like this? You couldn't understand what his gaze meant, but it was so different from his harsh, angry look that you just couldn't look away. 

"If you ask me to go kill Midoriya, I'm not doing it." You answered, and he rolled his eyes. "Can you shut up for a fucking second? I'm trying to ask you out here." 

Your eyes widened, bigger than he had ever seen them, as you choked on your voice. "You what?!" 

"You fucking heard me." He scoffed, but you could see the fear in his eyes. "As your part of the deal, I want you to... Go on a date with me." He looked at you expectedly. "Or kiss me, whatever pleases you." Bakugou smirked as you punched his arm, face burning. 

"I would love to go on a date with you." You smiled, and he grinned as he tried to hide his relief. "Of course you'll go on a date with me, you promised after all." 

"Worst deal of my life." You said jokingly, but he stopped walking suddenly. Maybe it was a little too early for those jokes, you thought and tried to fix it. "I didn't really mean-"

"And you'll not go meet Dunce face tonight for whatever the fuck it is meeting for." You rolled your eyes, scoffed as you started to walk. "Oh come on, Bakugou, no need to get all jealous now."

"Jealous, my ass." He muttered, but he swung his arm over your shoulder, just in case.

[mojofun]

Not My Type (Sirius Black x Reader)

Hello earthlings :) This is an entry for This is an entry for a writing challenge I’m taking part in, launched by the wonderful @obsessedwithrandomthings​ for getting 500 followers; congrats again :) The prompt I chose this time was <<You look so good in my shirt>>. I can just imagine our dear Sirius using lame one-liners when flirting with girls, and this is the result. P.S. I’ve been listening to Motionless in White lately, so this thing is packed with lyrics references. Besides, Sirius looks like the kind of guy who would totally dig that style of music so I thought “why not?” I hope you enjoy it!

Gif not mine, credits to @snuffles-padfoot07

<<Remus?>>

No answer

<<Remus. Remus Lupin>>

Still silence

<<Remus John Lupin>>

Still no reply

<<Moony. Moony, Moony, Moony->>

<<WHAT?!>> The taller Marauder ultimately snapped, turning to glare at his bespectacled friend; said friend acted like nothing happened, simply holding up a slip of paper

<<Do you think Lily will like it?>>

Sighing, Remus gave the poem a skim before rolling his eyes

<<Won’t you give the poor girl a moment of reprieve, James?>>

<<Cmon, help a friend in need!>>

<<Why me?>>

<<You always has a way with words>>

A snort came from the opposite side of the room

<<And yet, he still got no date>>

Remus scowled

<<Prongs, why don’t you ask Padfoot then? Merlin knows Y/N loves his idiotic pickup lines>>

Sirius acknowledged the hit, rising from his bed and walking toward his two mates with a strut. Once there, he took James’s poem and read it, nodding in approval

<<Go for it, pal>>

<<What about you, oh great master of poetry?>> Moony teased, still miffed about Sirius’s jab <<How will you annoy your muse today?>>

The shorter male chuckled, smirking mischievously

<<Don’t worry, Moony. I’m very well-prepared>>

<<That’s exactly what worries me>>

              _______

<<Y/N! Y/N!>>

Sirius greeted the H/C girl who’d just walked in the class with her friends. As soon as she saw him, she groaned

<<Oh no>>

<<Come sit by me!>>

Another H/N patted her back soothingly while she face-palmed

<<I think I already know what my boggart’s gonna look like>>

<<Oh love, come on! You don’t need to be afraid of me!>>

<<I’m not scared: now that I think about it, you look like my boggart after I’ve cast Riddiculus>> The female deadpanned.

Sirius was stumped.

Beside him, Janes cackled

<<Your girl’s got sass, Padfoot>>

The other guy could only nod, watching as his crush took a seat as far as possible from him- or tried to: thanks to his distraction, all the other spots were occupied.

That meant she was sitting in the next desk. 

Y/N hoped that she’d successfully quelled the Gryffindor’s idiotic onslaught.

Well, she did... Just for a little while though

<<Such a sharp tongue for someone so pretty, doll>>

<<I also own very sharp blades, Black>> The girl countered, glaring at him <<Do not tempt me>>

<<I knew you couldn’t resist!>> He cackled

<<Yes, my killing instincts are very strong right now>>

The quaint theatre was interrupted by the arrival of Professor Silvanus Kettleburn, who immediately gave dispositions for the class

<<Very well. Today, you will work in pairs>>

The sentence every student dreaded, especially poor Y/N.

It seemed luck was not on her side that day because, when the professor announced her partner, she was faced with a smug Sirius, grinning from ear to ear

<<You know, my therapist says I’m afraid of commitment. Wanna help me prove em wrong?>>

<<Interesting. I’ve never wanted to commit more>>

<<Really?>>

<<Yes; a murder>> The E/C-eyed student walked away from him, heading toward the fire crab the professor had assigned them

<<Ready to give up, Padfoot?>>

<<Never>>

<<I don’t know whether to commend you on your tenacity or call you foolish>> Remus commented

<<She’s made of fire, but I can handle it. And no, James; I’m not talking about the crab>>

              _______

<<No no no no. Stop right there>>

<<What?>>

<<You need to chop those before feeding the crab>>

<<Oh>>

<<Give them to me>>

Sirius nodded, handing her the food and watching her cut it, slowly and precisely

<<Where have you been all my life?>>

<<Hiding from you>> Y/N replied coolly.

The boy cackled

<<You’re smart, funny, pretty, and you’ve got an insane amount of sass. You’re everything I’m looking for in a girl>>

<<Wow, I’m so lucky>>

It would have been impossible to ignore the sarcasm lacing her words, but Sirius didn’t acknowledge it

<<Would you want to go watch a movie with me this weekend?>>

<<I’ve already seen it>>

<<How can you know?>>

<<You’re asking me out again: I’ve already lived this horror enough to last me a lifetime>>

The older Black brother laughed, shaking his head in amusement

<<Alright, let me try again>>

<<Please no>>

<<Can I take you out on Saturday?>>

<<Sorry, I’m having a headache this weekend>>

<<What?>>

<<Leftovers from the one you’re giving me now>>

But you->>

<<Bitch you’d give a fucking aspirin a headache>> She growled.

Once again, Sirius was at a loss for words. Not only had Y/N just used two swear words in a sentence, but he knew he’d already heard those words somewhere...

<<Wait a second. You listen to Motionless In White?>>

He cried out. The female snorted

<<Are you kidding me? They’re one of my favourite bands>>

<<I like them too>>

Finally, the tension between them seemed to dissipate. Finally, Sirius’s smile was not a smug grin but a real, happy smile.

Finally, Y/N smiled genuinely back at him.

How cliché would it be to say that they felt like they were the only ones in the world at the moment?

(Fire crab aside)

And yet, that exactly how they felt.

It was so exhilarating that Sirius just had to try again

<<Y/N?>>

<<Yes?>>

<<I know the only words that you have for me are give up and get out>> The girl chuckled, prompting him to continue <<but I’m here to stay, forever and always>>

She laughed more. It was not sarcastic or mirthless but a true, joyous laugh

<<You know, you’re not so bad once I get past the smug act>>

<<I feel like that’s the biggest compliment you ever paid me>>

<<You’re probably right, but don’t get ahead of yourself. My killing instinct are not raging right now: let’s keep it that way, shall we?>>

<<I’m ready to bleed to make amends>> He joked. The young woman cachinnated, shoving him playfully

<<You idiot. You’re making it hard not to like you>>

<<That was my objective>>

<<Continue on this road and you might just achieve it>>

<<I will. Besides, I know better than to tease you when you’re chopping stuff with a knife; you warned me>>

Y/N cackled one more time, shaking her head in amusement.

It was an incredibly welcome turn of events.

              _______

Later that day, the two students sat together for lunch in the Great Hall, discussing anything that came to mind. Mostly their favourite bands.

The more they found out they had similar tastes the more engaged they became.

It was quite a sight. It surely left Remus and James gobsmacked: they would have never thought Y/N would actually want to be with Sirius. Didn’t he annoy her as much as James did Lily, with his dumb pickup lines?

Apparently not.

Their surprise grew even more when their friend suddenly asked her on a date- nothing new there.

They’d enjoyed endless attempts by Padfoot to win the heart of the smart and beautiful H/N.

Her answer, on the other hand, was something entirely unexpected

<<Yes, Sirius: I will go on a date with you>>

The black-haired Marauder offered her a huge smile, making her laugh

<<Thank you, darling. You won’t regret it>>

<<I certainly hope not>>

<<I’ll even make sure the place I take you to has sharp knives, so you’ll know what to do if I get too annoying, alright?>>

The girl laughed so hard that tears fell from her eyes

<<You’re an idiot>>

<<Duly noted. But doesn’t this idiot deserve a kiss?>>

Remus and James half expected Y/N’s smile to turn into a frown, and for her to smack him in the face.

Instead, against all odds, she giggled and pulled him closer, pecking his cheek

<<I finally managed to break the cycle>> Sirius beamed. Y/N snorted

<<Not entirely: you’re still an idiot>>

              _______

Idiot or not, the date went so well that they went on a second one, and a third, a fourth... And so on, until they officially became a couple.

Which meant Remus, James and Peter had to deal with their best friend and his girlfriend sucking faces and being all lovey-dovey- though they were sure those two only did it to piss them off.

Well, they’d learnt how to deal with it, as long as it was just holding hands and kissing- making out, actually.

But none of them was ready to find the two of them in bed together in their dorm room

<<What the->>

<<Ah!>> Y/N startled, waking Sirius

<<For crying out loud, guys, won’t you ever knock?>>

The poor friends just stood there, red in the faces while Padfoot rubbed sleep out of his eyes.

Once he’d had enough, he shouted

<<Well, why are you still standing there? Get out, we need to change!>>

Not even Death-Eaters after them would have made the three boys run so fast.

The female chuckled, standing up and smoothing our her boyfriend’s shirt that she was wearing like a dress.

The boy in question stared at her adoringly, pulling her closer

<<You look so good in my shirt>>

He fully expected her to blush, but she smirked and replied cheekily

<<I look even better out of it>>

The wink that came immediately after threw him for a loop

<<Y/N...>>

<<Yes, dear?>>

<<... That’s such a lame pickup line>>

<<Yeah... I stole the idea from you, along with your shirt>>

<<And my heart>> Sirius played along

<<... Just like that, the lame throne is yours again>>

<<But that makes you the queen of lame>> He pointed out.

She didn’t know what to reply to that, so she swatted him on the chest.

He gasped in horror

<<You said you’d never hurt me>>

His joke made her laugh.

When she calmed down enough, she teased

<<You’d still give a fucking aspirin a headache>>

<<Oh, are you an aspirin?>> For old times’ sake, he decided to throw in another lame pickup line <<I’d love to take you every 4-6 hours>>

<<Isn’t that too much for you?>> She teased. He chuckled and pulled her in his lap, pecking her cheek

<<You are too much for me, but I’m never letting you go>>

Despite the light atmosphere, those words held a promise of forever, and they both wanted that.

Their lips met and their hands held the other close.

Once again, as cliché as it may sound, they felt like the only two people in the world

              ___Extra____

Outside the door Remus, James and Peter stood still, looking at each other in confusion and embarrassment

<<How long do you think it will take?>>

<<Well, Wormtail, I don’t know much about Padfoot’s prowess in bed but->>

<<I’m not talking about that, James>> The shorter Marauder spluttered.

Remus sighed

<<That was probably the most embarrassing thing to ever happen to me. And that’s saying something, taking into account I hang out with you three>>

James cackled

<<Oh, Moony, you wouldn’t->>

<<I have a question>> Peter piped up again

<<What would that be?>>

<<Why are we still standing here?>>

<<Oh, right. We should come back later>>

<<Better yet, let’s change our house>> Remus groused <<Merlin knows I’m never going back there>>

After some silence, James spoke again

<<Hey, Moony, do you think if I used those pickup lines on Lily, she would->>

Professor McGonagall spent the whole day wondering if the incredibly loud sound she heard in the morning was actually a scream, and where it had come from

[dammitadolfnomorecake]

Once Bitten, Twice Stupid prt 209

209

The problem with supernatural senses was the ability to hear everything. Lance sympathised with Keith, cringing in second hand embarrassment for how his fiancé tried to talk to Pidge. Keith’s awkwardness was a thing of legend. There were a lot of “ums” in his sentence, and he’d twice assured Pidge “that it was okay if she didn’t want to”, before he finally asked if they could talk. The pair of them heading into the house as Hunk kept his eye on them.

“Catching” Hunk staring, Lance decided to say fuck it to manners. Hunk wasn’t upsetting Pidge on purpose. Shay wasn’t upsetting Pidge on purpose. They just weren’t quite clicking and though it wasn’t his place to say it, he didn’t want Pidge to feel left out because her best friend was dating the woman of his dreams

“Hunk, what’s up?”

“Pidge just went off with Keith... I thought they were going to check on Shiro and Curtis... I’m just... uh, I’m kind of wondering why they left”

Scratching the back of his head, Hunk stumped the other “adults” at the table. Allura and Coran both nursing empty tea cups, with Krolia kicked back and holding her half empty beer near her stomach

“It’s nothing to be worried about. They’ll be fine”

“Yeah, but... Dude, don’t you think she’s been acting weird lately? She doesn’t message me as much as she used to, and she didn’t defend how useful UV light could be to hunting vampires”

Hunk took the bait. Sure, Lance had been leading him

“Keith noticed Pidge isn’t happy and he’s gone to have a chat and make sure she’s okay”

Hunk gaped at him. Lance would have chuckled at his friend’s surprise if he hadn’t squashed his ego down. He didn’t want to hurt Hunk, nor did he particularly enjoy the conversation they needed to have. Shay pressed her lips together for half a moment in thought, before breaking her silence

“I can’t remember anything that would have upset her. Are you sure she’s upset?”

“Pidge is learning how much adulting sucks. We’re all in relationships now. We don’t do the fun things we used to do together. We don’t have games night anymore. We don’t hunt. Her best friend is moving in with his girlfriend and she wants to be involved. You guys haven’t done anything technically wrong, she just misses the old times. She’d decapitate me for the hell of it if she heard me. She’s feeling a little insecure right now, but Keith’ll calm her down”

Hunk immediately teared up. Nooo. Not Hunk tears. Whenever Hunk got teary, he did too

“I didn’t... I didn’t realise”

The first tear rolled down Lance’s cheek, causing him to sigh at himself mentally. He was so weak when it came to Hunk tears

“That’s because you haven’t done anything wrong. I’d be mad if you had and my face wound be all scary. Everyone grows and changes. Keith and I can hardly deny we’re very focused on each other. It’s really easy to do when you’re in love. Maybe at the end of the night you could suggest a games night? Or you could have her look at properties with you? She’d probably be able to blackmail the realestate agent into giving you cheaper rent...”

“I didn’t...”

“Dude, I know. I’m in no position to talk either. I let her down too. I let all of you guys down. I love you, bro. I love her, too. You guys are my family. Pidge just needs a little reassurance your still best friends for life... I kind of hope they’re not inside too long, I need to pee... I can’t wait for this pregnancy to be over... I want to meet them already”

Allura placed her hand on his shoulder

“I’m sure they’ll be here soon. We all can’t wait to meet them. You and Keith shall be amazing parents”

“Yeah. It’s going to be weird not having them inside me anymore...”

Lance loved it when they moved. He loved resting his hands on his belly and feeling them moving. Already so full of life. He loved belly rubs from Keith, and the way Keith cuddled into his stomach, peppering kissed to his stretched skin as if trying to kiss their twins through it. But everything else was getting too much. The joint pain. The fatigue. The constant heavy feeling in his chest. The last week of feeling constantly ill. His stupid yoyoing ego that couldn’t understand how a pregnancy had weakened him so much. The fits of anger. His overly active sense of smell. He was tired... and tired of waiting... but he... he also wanted to wait until he went into labour naturally so he could keep feeling them inside of him. For years he’d wondered how it’d feel to be human again. To fall in love and do all the other amazing things humans did... He’d never felt more human than in the last month of his pregnancy. He wasn’t sure he could mentally cope with his ego if he and Keith did chose to wait much longer. Mums to be were amazing. Movies just didn’t do justice to all the ups and downs of pregnancy. Feeling a tingling in his skin, Lance looked down at his arm, realising he was starting to burn under the lack of cloud cover. He wanted to give Keith and Pidge privacy, but if he stayed outside much longer, he’d go up in flames... Then again, Keith did say he was “smoking hot”.

*

Lance’s living room had also been transformed. The same bunting that hung outside, hung from everywhere it could inside. Stopping by the bathroom, Lance waddled in on Keith and Pidge mid-hug. Keith probably didn’t know what to do with being hugged so fiercely, still, it was a nice moment between the pair of them

“Hey, guys. Got room for one more?”

Breaking the hug, Pidge moved to make space between her and Keith. Lance waddling over to drop himself down between the pair of them. Yeah. Keith had a point. Maybe it’d be better to deliver early rather than feel cramping when he sat wrong, or sat too fast. He’d recognised that with fatigue came pain sensitivity. Small cramps had been happening more often over the last week, and he’d been reduced to crying over them more than once.

Leaning in, Keith kissed his cheek, Lance smiling at the action because he was so grossly in love with Keith that even a small kiss still managed to make him feel a million times better

“I thought I left you outside?”

Lance moved to show Keith the start of the sunburn on his arm. He’d run it under cold water to ease the burn, but it was still warm and tender to the touch

“You did. Apparently too much sun is bad for vampires... who would have thought?”

“I did wonder if I should find you an umbrella...”

“I’m fine. Plus, I’ve got my two favourite people here, so I thought I’d come stock up on some love”

Excusing himself to the bathroom, Lance knew he’d upset Hunk yet Hunk had to figure out how to make things right with Pidge without his meddling. He probably could have been more tactful about things, and picked a better time to bring the subject up. This was supposed to be party, not a counselling session. Feeling the twins kicking up a storm, he took Pidge’s hand, placing it on his belly. His friends were good about not just touching his belly without asking first, Pidge the one who seemed to hesitate the most when it came to feeling him being bashed up internally

“I think they know that their Aunty Pidge is here”

“Either that or they’ve inherited Keith’s inability to sit still”

Keith pouted, Pidge poking her tongue at him causing the werewolf to huff

“Lance is just as bad as I am”

“Lance has changed a lot since you came into our lives. You both have. You can tell you two are dating. You’ve got that old married couple vibe where you finish each other’s sentences and sound the same”

Lance couldn’t deny it. Keith had picked up so many of the expressions he used. And Lance had definitely picked up Keith’s habit of swearing openly.

“That’s what happens when you fall in love. Actually, Keith and I have something to tell you. We’re madly grossly in love, not just in love”

Pidge rolled her eyes at him

“I already know that. One bite between you and you’ve both turned into idiots”

“You know what they say, “Once bitten, twice stupid””

“Dude, it’s “once bitten, twice shy”. But I like your one better. You bit Keith to save his life and you both turned into love struck morons with a shared brain cell between you”

Keith frowned heavily at Pidge’s joke, Lance snorting due to how true it was

“He really does feel like the other half of me. I’d be happy to share a brain cell with him any day of the week. I know you’re worried about the future, but you’re always going to be a sister to me, and an aunt to the twins. No more sad, Pidge, not when she’s a scary little ankle biting gremlin that we all love”

Pidge pulled her hand back, looking to her lap

“Hey, you know I’m proud of you, Katie. You’ve been through a heck of a lot, like the rest of us. Things might have changed and they might be scary, but you’ll always have a home here with us... provided you don’t bring your work home and destroy my house with your experiments”

Pidge groaned deeply

“You blow up a circuit board once and they never let you forget it. And, if you call me “Katie” again, I’m going to give you a dead arm to go with that dead body of yours”

“Oh no! The gremlin’s getting angry. Quick, babe. You’d better make her a coffee before her wrath descends upon us”

“Fuck you”

“I’m flattered, but I’m in a loving and committed relationship... I mean, if I were two decades younger...”

Pidge punched his arm to shut him up

“You suck”

Lance continued with his shit stirring mood

“Quite well, don’t I, babe?”

“I’m not getting into this, but yes”

“See, my skills have got Keith’s stamp of approval”

“You’re going to have my footprint stamped to your arse if you keep traumatising me like this”

Wrapping his arms around his gremlin, Lance kissed her hair. Pidge trying to shove him off

“I love it when you’re mean. I wouldn’t change a single thing about you”

“Keith, help. Lance is being weird”

Keith hefted him back so Lance was laying awkwardly in his arms looking up at his fiancé. Bopping him on the nose, Lance went cross eyed as Keith let his finger hover

“Babe, leave the bitey creature alone. She’s fine. More importantly, did you put cream on your arm?”

Lance didn’t really prescribe to the use of burn cream seeing he healed on his own. Cold water would forever be the best things for burns

“Burn cream isn’t always good for burns, aaaaand the aloe vera is in our bathroom. Which is upstairs, and totally too much effort right now”

“You can’t ignore it. Where else got burnt?”

“I don’t know. Stop picking on me. I thought we were picking on Pidge”

“We’ve done that. I’ll grab the aloe vera, and Pidge can get you some blood. We have the whole day to relax... provided no one’s gone and planned party games”

Pidge burst that bubble. That tiny bubble of maybe fitting an uncaught nap in... This fatigue thing was ridiculous

“Oh, dude. There’s totally party games. We’re going to set up penalty beer pong under lunch”

Keith scrunched his brow. From how he was positioned, Lance kind of wanted to poke his finger right up Keith’s nose. It was like his nose was staring down at him, begging to be poked

“Should I be worried?”

Lance didn’t like to brag, but beer pong was his jam. His first time through college not so much, second time, he was pretty much undefeated. With how long it took to set up, it wasn’t usually one of their party games. Poor Keith had no idea what penalty beer pong had in store for him, Lance would have to defend his fiancé’s honour

“Seeing it’ll be you and Lance facing off, you should definitely be worried. Buuuut I totally didn’t tell you that. If you two are going to keep being gross, I’m going to go back to the party”

Whelp. Keith was on his own then... It was nice knowing him

“It’s okay, Pidgeon. Go forth and abandon us. Leave us... be that way... We’ll be back out as soon as I’ve had some blood and this sunburn starts healing. Maybe I should change into something longer, I don’t want to burst into flames at my own baby shower”

Keith bopped him on the nose again, before helping Lance sit back up

“That’s probably a good idea, babe. You’re smoking hot as it is. That’d make you literally flaming hot”

Pidge was completely right. They really did share one brain cell. The idea leaving a stupidly huge grin on his face that Pidge called “creepy” before leaving the pair of them.

*

Penalty beer pong... of all the things they could have played, they’d chosen some kind of abomination that belonged in hell. After lunch, Hunk had taken Lance aside, while Matt and Pidge took Keith inside. Both of them forced to wear headphones so they couldn’t hear each others answers to the questions for their friends had prepared. Keith felt very very dumb. 20 questions on Lance should have been easy... but their friends had really wracked their brains being creative and going for the odd, mostly unknowable things that he was supposed to know about his “boyfriend”.

With the living area the only place big enough to fit all of them, the coffee table was covered with a thick piece of plywood where the cups were set up. Keith didn’t like to admit that he’d never played beer pong. He’d never had the kinds of friends that did, nor did he go to college. One of the more popular games at Blade headquarters was darts with knives instead of darts, and vampire faces for targets. You took a shot if you failed to stick the knife in the vampire when it was your throw. He’d never been invited to play with James and the rest of them... He and Shiro used to have shooting target competitions, but that was just the pair of them with the winner getting out of some mundane house chore, that Adam usually scolded them about.

Kneeling across from him, they’d both avoided the penalty cups so far. Keith thought not getting the ball in one meant not having to drink what was it in. No. Instead the penalty was played out for each question they got wrong about each other. Each cup contained some kind of condiment construction Keith really wanted to avoid. It started tame, first with chilli sauce, then soy, then vinegar... slowly progressing in quantity and combination. The last cup was a grotesque mix of what seemed to be a little of everything from Lance’s pantry. Having swapped questionnaires, Hunk and Matt were their quiz masters. They were fifteen questions in, Keith not feeling the effects of the vodka he’d had to chug when Lance got the ping pong ball in his cups. His fiancé, not able to drink, was delegated water. Keith wasn’t sure that Lance actually won anything from playing against him seeing he’d have to pee the moment the game was done.

“Lance. What is Keith’s most annoying habit?”

Throwing the ping pong ball, his fiancé landed it perfectly in the cup. That’s how it went. Question, throw, answer, shot...

“His amazingly lacking self confidence since turning into a werewolf”

His damn fiancé got that one right... like the rest of them.

“Keith. How many years, combined, did Lance spend attending University?”

How the fuck was he supposed to know that? He didn’t know how long it took to be a lawyer... he didn’t know how long it took, or if Lance had any recognition of prior training to drop the amount of time he was required to study, plus his fiancé was a smart little shit... Lance looked sympathies and smug at the same time. Yeah. His questions were far easier than Keith’s had been. Tossing the retrieved ping pong ball, it landed in one of the penalty cups

“Um... I’m going to with... um... 12 years”

Lance groaned, Keith knowing he’d gotten the answer wrong. Matt delighted in telling him

“11 years and six months. Apparently being a lawyer in the early 90’s meant less time in class... Your first penalty shot is chilli sauce. Bottoms up”

If a jalapeño’s had sex with another jalapeño, then their offspring continued in breeding, that would only explain the fire in Keith’s mouth. His eyes running as his throat burned. That wasn’t simple chilli sauce in there

“God... it burns... what the hell is that?”

“Ghost pepper sauce”

Lance shot Matt a glare

“That’s not very nice. You guys are dicks”

Matt shrugged at Keith fanned his burning mouth

“Then he shouldn’t have gotten the question wrong”

“We didn’t really talk about it. Babe, you okay? Rieva, can you get Keith some milk, please. You guys are banned from giving Keith chilli ever again”

“Chill, dude. He’ll survive. Right, it’s your turn”

Lance plucked the ball from what looked to be soy sauce, unamused Keith’s ego wanted to flip the stupid board of cups over. Their friends were slightly laughing at his reaction to the chilli and Rieva hadn’t gone to get him a glass of milk

“Okay, Lance. What’s Keith’s deepest secret that he’s hiding at he moment?”

Keith had answered “He’d always believe in mothman until his dying breath”. Lance hummed at the question

“That he doesn’t hate Lotor as much as he says... it’s either that, something to with me, or something to do with his crush on mothman”

“Correct...”

No. That wasn’t correct at all! The game was rigged

“You two didn’t bother telling us that you’re engaged! Which is a secret to do with Lance, so technically correct!”

Suddenly Keith got the feeling that beer pong was less about what they knew about each other and more about what the group suspected and wanted to confirm

“They’re what?!”

From Pidge’s yelling, she mustn’t have been in on it... So this was all Matt’s idea to get them to confess to their secret engagement?! He could strangle him for putting them both on the spot like this. Right. He could play it cool... yep. No secret here

“What are you talking about?”

“Don’t play dumb, dude. We found the empty ring box in your bedside drawers. Why didn’t you tell us?! Do you know how happy we are for you guys?! This is awesome... Maybe not as awesome as Rieva saying yes to me, but we’re supposed to be your friends! We need to have a party to celebrate this”

Ahhhh. Keith wanted to laugh in relief. They hadn’t been caught yet, and now it seemed like a pretty fun idea to mess with Matt for going through their things

“That’s was from Krolia. There was never any ring in that box”

“You expect us to believe that?”

Keith glanced to his mother, Krolia shrugging as the others also looked to her

“Miriam and I both thought they’d make the cutest grooms. It’s not my fault he hasn’t proposed yet”

“What makes you think I’d be the one asking? Lance could always ask me, right, babe?”

“Yep. I totally could have been the one to ask him”

Sharing a look, Matt and Hunk both chuckled. Their “Sunshine Teddy” shaking his head

“Man, we all know Lance is the romantic one. He’d spend everyday waiting for you to ask, rather than asking you. Then, he’d expect the whole fairytale night. Dinner at a fancy restaurant. A bouquet of red roses as big as him...”

Hunk counted on his fingers, Matt adding as Hunk stalled mid-thought

“Don’t forget the champagne and the hotel room”

Hunk quickly counted those two on his fingers

“Yep. Lance is too much of a romantic”

Matt nodded quickly

“He’d drop hints too... Romcoms. Jewellery brochures... Though you’d probably miss them like you missed Valentine’s Day”

The pair were ganging up on him, Keith depressed about the fact they were right. Lance would have loved all that, but his fiancé didn’t need all that. He’d proposed in a horrible hotel room...

“Keith is romantic. Sure, his idea of good date is a trip to a shooting range, or some other combat related activity, but he’s very romantic. I don’t need all the fuss, I just need him”

Hunk faked feeling faint as he grabbed Matt by the arm, Matt playing it up and acting as if he were concerned

“Hunk?!”

“I’m okay... I never thought I’d live to hear Lance say something so unLance like. Pregnancy has changed you, man. Next thing you’ll give up watching your soap operas... Dude, my heart can’t handle the changes”

Keith mentally thanked Lance for trying to stick up for him. He wasn’t the world’s greatest fiancé, yet he felt better that Lance thought he was good enough for him. His fiancé had more to say on the matter

“You two keep picking on Keith. He’s awkward and he’s a little emo, but he makes me happy. We could get engaged in a room so dingy that Jesus couldn’t save it, and I’d still be happy”

Hunk waved his arm, kind of weirdly and kind of as if he were trying to gesture “how big this was”. Keith felt his lips turn upwards as Lance pretty much told everyone they’d gotten engaged while away, yet none of their friends would put two and two together

“But as long as I’ve known you, you’ve always been a sucker for those big movie engagement scenes”

“Movies aren’t real life. Matt, that box wasn’t any of your business. What were you doing in our room?”

“Helping Shiro and Curtis build your present. We were looking for an adjustable spanner”

Lance leaned back to rest his weight on his hands, bottom lip wobbling

“You know the tools are kept in the laundry, and you know you’re not supposed to be in my room...”

“We were...”

No one messed with Lance’s room, or his bed. Lance washed and changed the sheets alone, swapping the blankets whenever the whim took over

“I don’t care. I’m sorry, but I can’t... I need air”

Keith jumped to his feet before Lance started started struggling to his. As Coran went to help the vampire, Lance slapped his hand away with a sad “sorry”. Moving to Lance’s side, Keith looped his arm around his waist

“You guys can take over playing. No listening in”

[lady-divine-writes]

Kama Sutra for the Married Man

Summary: Aziraphale thinks that he should take his and Crowley’s relationship to another level.

From the book his angel is reading, Crowley isn’t sure exactly what level that is.

Neither does Aziraphale. (1744 words)

Notes: Inspired in part by this wonderful piece of fanart by @millerizo. Rated PG13. Fluff and a lot of second hand embarrassment.

(AO3)

“Whotcha got there, angel?”

“Crowley! Oh!” Aziraphale twists in his seat, jumping nearly six feet straight in the air when his husband walks through the door. “I didn’t hear you come in!”

“Obviously. Is that a new book?” Crowley grabs it out of Aziraphale’s hands before the angel can think to hide it. “Must be good. You look like I caught you with your hand in the cookie jar.”

“What!? What are you talking about? That? Th-that’s nothing! It’s just a boring old book. Just got it in. Taking a browse before I put it on the shelf.” He tries to swipe it back, but his husband is too quick, perching on the back of the sofa across the way and opening it, picking up where Aziraphale left off.

“Whoa!” Crowley barks a laugh at the first picture he sees. “Well that was a little white lie, wasn’t it, angel?” He leans in close, squinting at the diagrams crowding the page, then flips to the cover to check the title for more context. “Kama Sutra for the Married Man?” He chuckles once, high pitched and giddy, and on Aziraphale’s small cushion, the world skids on its axis and stops cold. “Now where do you expect this fits in with all the children’s books Adam stocked in this place?”

“Well, I …”

“Wait, wait, wait! Don’t tell me!” Crowley interrupts, choking on his own joke. “Between The Hardy Boys and Nancy Drew, right?”

Aziraphale pinches his knees together, praying that, at some point, he’ll dissolve into the ground beneath his feet. “A-actually …”

“Seriously, though - why in the world are you reading this?”

Crowley stares at Aziraphale, waiting for an answer.

Aziraphale stares at the floor, hoping to spontaneously discorporate.

He sighs, shifts in his seat and rolls his eyes. It’s just a book, he tells himself. A book full of explicit and vulgar pictures. Crowley is his husband. It shouldn’t be hard to talk about this. He clears his throat, attempting to shoo a metric ton of discomfort and embarrassment from his brain.  

“Because we’re married now, Crowley. Married people …” Aziraphale continues, but using only vague hand gestures to express his meaning. The half-smirk growing on Crowley’s face as he watches him suffer through this explanation spears him to the bone. “Isn’t that something you want to … do?”

“I’ve never asked for this, have I?” Crowley spins the book 180 degrees, trying to make sense of the next picture on the page.

“No, but I thought it was because you were being …”

Crowley’s head snaps up, his slotted, reptilian eyes fixed on his husband’s face. “Don’t say it!”

“… nice.”

Crowley groans, flailing dramatically, nearly falling head over heels backwards. “I told you not to say it!”

“Or you don’t want me,” Aziraphale murmurs under his breath. It’s soft, downright imperceptible, but Crowley hears, and it makes him take notice. He takes a good long look at his husband for the first time tonight. Aziraphale has already showered, his hair combed down neatly and he’s dressed for bed, but in his best dressing gown. A sublte sniff tells Crowley he’s splashed on his best cologne.

Those clues and this book?

Crowley slowly begins to understand.

Whatever this is about (and Crowley has a good idea …) it’s not spontaneous. He’s been planning this.

But they haven’t spoken about it. Aziraphale came up with this on his own, based off an assumption.

And now he’s making another one.

Crowley shakes his head, amused grin on his face trying its hardest to be sympathetic, but he can’t help himself. Aziraphale is the most clever being he’s ever known. Why is it then he can also be so incredibly dense?

“Does anything you’ve seen in this book make you comfortable, angel?”

Aziraphale recalls the few diagrams he’d seen before Crowley snatched the book away. They make him shudder, and not in a good way. He knows about physical affection, intimacy, and sex, but the stuff in that book looked medieval … and that coming from someone who lived during the Spanish Inquisition. Frankly, the thought of it all – the sweet and the severe - makes Aziraphale anxious, sweating like a condemned man minutes from a beheading (yet another situation he has first-hand knowledge of) and angels don’t even sweat! But Crowley’s a demon. They’re more like humans in that regard, Aziraphale finds. Demon needs are different than that of angels, right?

Aziraphale doesn’t know for certain. He couldn’t find the time – or the courage – to ask.

He pulls himself up straight and squares his shoulders, hands gripping his knees till his knuckles turn white, but he can’t look his husband in the eyes. “No, but …” He swallows hard enough to make his throat and chest ache “… I’d be willing to do it … for you? If that’s what you wanted?”

Crowley nods at the response of his adorable but oblivious husband. “A-ha. Well, let me have a look-see, alright?” He flips through the pages of the book, not really focusing on the pictures, more stalling to give himself time to think. They’ve only talked about sex once that he can remember. It wasn’t even in the context of their relationship (since, at the time, they hadn’t owned up to having one) but Aziraphale turned into a stuttering mess. Crowley would be willing to revisit that discussion if Aziraphale wishes. But there’s a tremendous difference between making love and the carnal gymnastics outlined in this book. Why Aziraphale thought this was the direction Crowley would want to go is beyond him. “There’s a pretty picture, if I do say so!” he growls, delighting in the shade of ruby red his angel becomes. “Though I think there’s about four people wrapped up in that ball of coital agony. I’m having a little trouble pinpointing all the limbs … And this one? No. I’d have to be in serpent form to pull that one off. And this …” He throws his head back and honestly laughs out loud “… well, we could get into this one, but we’d have to miracle our way out, and I can just imagine the angry letters you’d get over that!” Crowley flips through more pages, muttering commentary for the sake of torturing his husband, who’s become as petrified as an ancient tree stump. In the dead middle of the book, Crowley finally comes up with a plan. He bites his lower lip, suppressing a smile. “Ah, I think this one’s more our speed.” He climbs down from the back of the couch to settle on the cushions where he can look his angel in the eye. “Number 117.”

“A-and, pray tell, wh-what is that?” Aziraphale asks, trying to peek over the top of the book to see. But like any good poker player, Crowley keeps it close to his chest, out of his angel’s view.

“It’s where I carry you to bed,” Crowley says smoothly, “tuck you under the covers, and bring you a tray of tea and biscuits. We read a book, you fall asleep in my arms, and we call it a day.”

Aziraphale’s eyebrows snap together so quickly, Crowley swears they make a sound. “Is that really in there?”

Crowley closes the book, index finger wedged between the pages to save the spot, challenging his angel to call his bluff. “If you’re determined to go through with this, we’ll do what’s underneath my finger. Do you honestly want to check and risk proving me wrong?”

Aziraphale’s eyes fall on the book and stay there. No, he doesn’t. He doesn’t want to prove Crowley wrong. He knows Crowley is lying. Demons lie – that’s what they do. Even the better ones. But not all lies are necessarily bad. Some lies spare people from hurt feelings, keep them from doing things they’re not prepared to do. But now, he feels more than a bit foolish. He hadn’t exactly been gung ho about the plan he’d come up with for tonight, but this is a bit of a letdown.

But that has to do with his own self-doubt and feelings of inadequacy.

In the six thousand years they’ve known one another, Crowley has never done a single thing, said a single word to make Aziraphale feel inadequate. There’ve been the odd jokes, of course, the way friends will, but none of them ever hit at the heart of Aziraphale. He pictured that same energy carrying them through this small change in their relationship.

But as it turned out, that change wasn’t so small. Transitioning from friends to husbands flipped a handful of otherwise dormant switches in Aziraphale’s mind, made him start to question whether or not who he was was enough.

Crowley is just so much, and Aziraphale?

He’s so soft.

Crowley obviously fell in love with the angel he is, and has never asked him to change, but Aziraphale began to think that his demon needed something more.

At the time, he felt his logic was sound.

He should have realized that love is all that matters, and his husband loves him enough to give him an out.

Shouldn’t he take it?

“Number 117 it is!” he says, patting his poor strangled knees. “I’ll start the kettle!”

“And I’ll get the biscuits.” Crowley tosses the book aside, miracling it with a snap of his fingers into a signed first edition of The Adventures of Beekle – The Unimaginary Friend, which he feels better fits both his angel and his shop.

Both stand, meeting in the middle on their way to the kitchen. Aziraphale stops Crowley with a hand to his bicep, looks into his husband’s eyes, and smiles. “Thank you, Crowley.”

He starts on his way but Crowley winds an arm around his waist and holds him still against him.

“Make no mistake, angel,” he whispers, lips dancing kissing-distance from his ear. “I want you, but my reasons have nothing to do with sex. Nothing at all. If it’s not important to you, it’s not important to me. Understand?”

Aziraphale blushes for the nineteenth time during this conversation, but in a softer, less scandalized shade of pink. With the touch of Crowley’s arm doing weird things to his head, Aziraphale utters the only two words that pop to mind.

Incidentally, they’re the only two words he could come up with at their wedding, when Crowley’s fond eyes on Aziraphale’s face affected him this same exact way.

“I do.”

[frappucinhoe]

hey!! u said u take requests and i was wondering if u could do one focusing on souda stimming?? or just little asd quirks haha idk i just really like that you write him with asd as i never see that so anything like that id be happy to see if youd like to write it!! thank u!!

Absolutely! This is such a cute prompt, thank you! I hope this is okay, I had this plot kicking around in my head a little bit anyway. I feel like this one’s like… half baked and I feel a little bad that it’s not great, but for some reason I’ve been struggling to put pen to paper recently. This is also available on AO3

https://archiveofourown.org/works/17968895

[

]

Exams always wiped both Souda and Gundham out- and they often spent more time apart than together during them. Hope’s Peak High School’s exams were long, public displays of your talent, and it was quite nervewracking. It was much simpler for Souda, as his skill was provable within a few moments by taking apart and repiecing an engine. Gundham had to show off his most perfect animals and convey to the panel why his animals were so good. They weren’t exactly experts, so “I’ve never once had a case of Wet Tail among my hamsters” really meant nothing to them. He really hat

Gundham needed space and time to be with his animals at a time like this, so Souda thoroughly appreciated the time he did get to spend with his boyfriend. Like now, they were sat in the dormitory’s study lounge, pouring over papers and schematics. They were sitting in comfortable silence, but he was strangely anxious and uncomfortable. When he’d asked Gundham if they could hang out, he kind of just wanted to lay down with the other and destress. He was a little bit touch starved, worried about the exams for both himself and Gundham, and worried about a thousand other things all at once (as per usual.)

Because he hadn’t thought they would be studying, he hadn’t really brought any of his things. Usually he had things on him to stop restless hands- dice, a worry stone, small model planes to disassemble and reassemble. He had at one point had one of those spinners that were so popular, but the others poked fun at him for it quite a bit, so he kept that one put away, not trying to make his self-percieved deficiencies any more obvious. He didn’t have anything on him this time, though, and his mind was racing at a million miles an hour. Everything was just too much. The papers, the constant scratch of Gundham’s pencil on paper, the tag of his t-shirt felt like a razorblade on the back of his neck, and Gundham’s barely-there presence that made him feel like he needed to stay silent and unobtrusive. His thoughts started getting the better of him, pelting him with insults as he fought to keep still.

A study date? He doesn’t like me anymore, I knew it. God this exam is driving me nuts. I don’t need to study I know how to build a fucking rocket from car parts. I’ve done it before. He wouldn’t even hold my hand in the hallway today. He’s just waiting until after exams to leave me. Oh god oh god oh god oh god

Unconciously, he brought his hand up to his mouth and began chewing at his nails, which were already basically stumps. Gundham glanced up at him from across the small table and frowned.

“Stop.” He said, simply.

“Stop what?” Souda asked, cocking his head.

“Chewing your nails. Stop it, it’s not good for you. It’s gross. ”

Great. Now he’s mad at me.

Truth be told, it was one of Gundham’s pet peeves to watch (and hear) somebody chew on their nails. It was gross and obnoxious- it didn’t occur to him why Souda may be doing it, though. While he had been given a vague idea of his boyfriends’ diagnoses, he was unsure of their effects. He didn’t want to read up on anything and view anything the other did as a symptom and not just a part of Souda’s behavior- in fact he found many of the other’s quirks endearing.

Just not chewing on his nails.

“Oh.” Souda replied, wiping his hand off on his jumpsuit and then putting his hands on the table, twiddling his thumbs for a moment before picking up a pencil. He began tapping it on the table, feeling minutely satisfied with the way the eraser bounced off the table. After a few moments of that, Gundham looked up once again.

“Beloved One, if you must insist on making noise, can you go somewhere else, I’m trying to focus.”

Souda put the pencil down, slouching, trying to hide his frown. He started scrunching his fist rapidly instead, occupying his other hand with his head as he started looking over the papers in front of him again. He picked up a pen to make a note, and immediately began clicking the pen tip incessantly, searching for something to calm his mind.

Gundham snatched the pen from his boyfriend’s fingers, clenching his teeth with irritation. Souda straightened up, looking at the other with wide, almost terrified eyes. He started crying very quickly after.

Gundham, not noticing that the other had started crying, snapped on him.

“I have requested, politely, that you stop. Can you please, for my sake, quiet down or leave. I am here because you requested my presence and you-”

“I’m sorry!” Souda cried out, cutting the other off as he sniffled and tried to stifle his tears. He was equal parts angry and absolutely terrified that he’d upset Gundham. “I’m sorry, I- I- I- I’m not trying to bother you I just feel so burnt out and I don’t want to look at pa- papers and schematics any more! I just want-wanted to-” he stopped, taking in a shaky breath. “- hang out and n-not think about these fucking exams! I’m sorry- I gotta go, I don’t- I didn’t wanna upset you!” he got up and left in a hurry, leaving his papers.

Gundham watched, immediately feeling bad that he had snapped like that- he was just irritated, beyond stressed about exams. He didn’t want to immediately follow the other, he was clearly upset. He took his time packing his and Souda’s belongings before traipsing out into the hallway, moving quickly toward’s Souda’s room. He was stopped dead in his tracks by one of Souda’s best friends, Fuyuhiko Kuzuryuu. The two were unlikely friends, but often went out drinking together or cracked jokes together during class, and it made Gundham happy that he wasn’t the only one sticking his neck out for Souda. The only issue was that Fuyuhiko tended to be a tad bit overprotective of his friends.

“What the fuck did you do?” The gangster asked, crossing his arms.

“It appears I have upset my Dark Prince, and I wish to go apologize to him. Do you take issue with this, Short One?”

“I take issue with you makin’ my friend cry, yeah.” Fuyuhiko said, glaring daggers up at Gundham.  He had just caught Souda hastily leaving the study lounge, covering his eyes with his hat and going into his room, slamming the door.

“It was not intentional. ” Gundham said, growing upset that Fuyuhiko would accuse him of hurting Souda on purpose. “I simply grew irritated with his incessant fidgeting. I did not know he would react so poorly.”

Fuyuhiko’s face grew angry rather quickly.

“Incessant fidgeting? it’s self stimulation, you fuckin’ moron.” Fuyuhiko faltered for a moment, failing to find the right words to lay into the other with, angry beyond belief. “So you ignore him for pretty much a whole week, and then when he finally gets your attention, you yell at him for something he can’t control? Why, you fuckin’ idiot, I oughtta fuckin-”

“You oughtta do nothing. My relationship is not any of your business.”

“Like fuck it isn’t! Do you not realize you’re practically his whole world? I am constantly getting my phone blown up with him absolutely racking his brain, overanalyzing every single little thing you do making sure he’s still good enough for you, that he isn’t overbearing, that he isn’t being a nuisance to you. I get that that’s how he is, he’s more skittish than a fuckin’ housecat, but it doesn’t help when you attack him for the few things that make him feel better.”

Gundham took in a stabilizing breath, getting dressed down in public was not something he enjoyed, and if it weren’t for the prefects and auditors absolutely crawling campus, he’d sic his Zodiac Generals on Fuyuhiko immediately. He also thought that maybe attacking Souda’s friends wasn’t a great way to get into their good graces. He and Fuyuhiko didn’t hate eachother, sure, but they certainly didn’t see eye to eye.

“I must be going.” Gundham said, making a sharp about face and beginning to move towards the dorm rooms once more. He felt his arm grabbed, and ripped away from the grip, turning around to face the culrpit.

“If you hurt Kazuichi, if you so much as make him feel bad for one second over something as simple as trying to keep calm, I swear to god, Tanaka, you won’t hear the end of it. Just because you pretend you aren’t human doesn’t mean you can act like human emotion is something below you.”

Gundham nodded, taking his leave. Fuyuhiko was a little bit (okay, maybe a bit over-the-top) protective of his friends. Gundham couldn’t blame him, but he was left fuming by even the suggestion that he was a bad boyfriend over one small altercation. He cared about Souda, he really did. He was just stressed, and upset, and maybe not as educated as he could be on the minutia of his boyfriend’s mental health. He also grew sad, knowing that Souda was so anxious about his presence around Gundham- he absolutely adored the mechanic, and very rarely did he truly bother him. If he wanted to be alone, he made that clear, but otherwise he was very much open to and excited seeing his boyfriend. If he didn’t want to be with Souda, he wouldn’t be, and he couldn’t think of many things that the other could do to change that how much he adored him.

He grabbed his keys and went to just enter the room, but decided instead to knock. It was met with no reply, so he knocked again, this time to announce that he was coming in anyway. He had a good idea of what he was gonna see when he entered, and he was right.  Souda was on the ground, bare feet, headphones in, working on a rubik’s cube like his life depended on it. A few different things were set out in front of him, all things Gundham had seen the other playing with on occasion but hadn’t thought much of.  Gundham had seen this before too, though, when the other was inordnately stressed out. The absolute unbreakable focus, the loud music, doing absolutely anything but the actual work he had to do. Souda was remarkable in his ability to focus, to just absolutely dial in on things and tune the whole world out when he was interested in them. Gundham was actually jealous, he often found his mind drifting as he carried out the tasks his animals required each day.

Gundham approached, and still wasn’t noticed by the other, who was clearly intently focused. He pursed his lips and squatted down so he was at eye level with the other, and placed a gentle hand on his shoulder. Souda jumped, yelping quite loudly and throwing the cube on accident, watching with wide eyes and a pounding heart as it shattered into 26 individual pieces. He blinked a few times, taking his headphones out carefully.

“I’m… so sorry. I did not mean to startle you.”

Souda just stared for a moment, brows knitted together. He was clearly struggling to shift his focus. Gundham gave about a minute of silence before speaking again, trying to allow the other a moment to calm down. He truly hadn’t meant to startle the other, it was clear that the mechanic didn’t expect that he’d be followed back to his room.

“I apologize, my Dark Consort. You did not deserve my wrath. You were simply-”

“Don’t. Save it. I know, it’s irritating, okay? It bothers me too. I’ve been hearing it all my life. Stop clicking the pen, stop bouncing your leg, stop chewing your nails, stop making weird noises, Hey, Souda, aren’t you a little old to be playin’ with toys? Oh, hey, Kazuichi, your stimming makes other people uncomfortable! I get it, sorry, I was doing it because I was uncomfortable, but I’ll stop. I’m sorry.”

Gundham frowned. He adjusted himself so he was no longer squatting, but sitting on the ground as well. He vowed never to be the person who made Kazuichi feel so bad ever again, and here he was. Bitter memories of quarrels with the other flooded back up with the guilt and he bit down mard on the inside of his lip, searching for the right words to say. There was a long pause. He could hear the music coming from Souda’s headphones which now sat on the ground, a quiet bassy buzzing.

“I understand it is something that you cannot help, and-”

“No. That’s where you’re wrong. I can help it. I can just shut down! It’s that easy. Can’t let your thoughts burn a hole in your mind if your mind is on vacation.”

Gundham sighed, he had clearly really hurt Souda’s feelings when he hadn’t intended to. He just wasn’t the best with feelings, and to be honest, with Souda it was a minefield. He insisted more than once that ‘hey, if I’m ever bugging you, just let me know’, but then as soon as Gundham said something he exploded? It seemed unfair, but in hindsight, bouncing a pencil on the table was harmless, and

“Forgive me, my Dark Prince, for I love you so much and it was not my intention to make you self concious or feel…” he paused, unsure of how to procede. “…less than.”

Souda crossed his arms, half-pouting.

“You did though, but it’s fine. Stop apologizing. I know I’m crazy, okay? I know I’m annoying and quite frankly you shouldn’t have to put up with it.”

There was a long silence, again, where they both just sat there.

As he watched the pout fade from Souda’s face, Gundham scooted closer to the other and wrapped his arms around Souda. Tense muscles became loose immediately, and he knew he had the other within reach again.

“I’m sorry.” He said again, reiterating. “I don’t think you’re different, or stupid, or crazy. I hesitate to think you are anything but absolutely incredible. Your mind is amazing, and l adore you.”

“I-

"And I want you to know that you need not keep secrets. You very seldom are an unwelcome presence. If you are not occupying the room I am in, you are certainly occupying my mind.” Gundham finished. Souda let out a long sigh. He brought his hands up, playing gently with the bandages that covered Gundham’s arm.

“English, please?” He asked, his mind still racing, struggling a little bit to parse the other’s ridiculous, drawn out language.

Gundham hesitated for a moment, watching the hands idly play along his bandages. It occured to him that Souda often did that- running his fingers through Gundham’s hair, playing with the pins on his coatsleeve- it had never occured to him that it may be more than just a simple show of affection.

“You are very much wanted, and you are most certainly more than good enough.” Gundham said, hoping he got his point across well enough. Souda smiled and hid his face in the other’s coat, his face red.

“I’m s-” he started, the words muffled.

“Do not apologize. You did nothing wrong, My Love. Why don’t we take a brief hiatus from our studies?”

Souda pulled his face free from the smothering wool of Gundham’s thick coat and smiled, “I’d like that. A lot.” he replied.

[twice-the-twice-love]

Dammit Sako Fic and Art under the cut

Ao3 link

4.4K words 

Jin x Sako 

Season 4 spoilers for BNHA

He had the best of rash intentions. Jumping to be the first one in action after Twice brought a deranged gangster, killer to the base. Sako was not the youngest but not outdated like that man was. He barely heard Shigaraki call out for him to stop but he was in motion now and was not going to be easily stopped. He was just going to keep his alliance members safe. 

“This guy’s bad news! I’ll imprison him!”

He felt a small hint on his side almost like another small miniscule chunk of this abandoned place’s ceiling was falling down then he was there beside Overhaul hand on the man and his quirk failed him. Very faintly under his breath that the only two who could guess what he said was Overhaul and himself, “I can’t activate it.”

There was the tones of distraught in his voice as he spoke but it was drowned out by the rage and utter disgust in the other man’s shout, “Don’t touch me!”

With a sweep of an arm Sako found himself in a world of blinding pain no thought behind his scream. That was instinct as he stumbled and fell back trying to push himself from the gangster falling on his left side and writhing in pain. His body wanting to do nothing more than curl into the fetal position and to just have this nightmare stopped. Sako still managed push away and push up as Shigaraki dashed right past him.

His blood was pumping in his ears as the world was becoming fuzzy as he felt a warm wet sensation on his side, under his mask his mouth falling open as he tried to breathe through it all. He made it another few feet before he felt someone grab under one of his arms and around his waist. He saw darkness no matter where he looked and then heard Twice shout out, “I’ll fucking kill you! You bastard!”

Twice was so loud it seemed but then he focused on the man beside him and saw the colours on his outfit, “Twice could you-”

“Make him take Responsibility!” Twice sounded coherent but close to breaking. Almost like he was fighting back tears, now that would be a sight to see.

The pain was intense but the adrenalin was slowly leaving his system and he could hear the others talk, though what good it did him was not something he needed to dwell on now. They must have left because Twice was back to looking at him and trying to get Sako to look him in the eyes despite both of them hiding behind masks, “Compress? Come on I am going to help you.”

He wished Twice gave more of a warning before practically lifting him to his feet. He moved his arm and a bit out to stabilize himself but then could not stop the whine or sucking air through his teeth to stop himself from screaming at the pain, “Twice please I can walk, it was just-”

No one expected him to say it yet. If anyone spoke it, then this nightmare might become a reality. He took a few steps towards the opposite exit and then felt Twice move beside him and tried to make Sako lean on him the non wet side, “If you can walk can you run?”

Sako nodded dully and picked up the pace feeling Twice steadying him to keep him moving. Though he let out a small whimper of pain when some strands of his coat touched the exposed nerves in his arm then collapsed. Twice was right beside him. Ripping off his tape measure  and constricting it around the top part of the remnants of his arm. Painfully so as he knew he tried to move away. Twice held him there carefully moving would make it worse. Things that would scar do that. Thought the scars would be very different but still change a man.

“Twice it’s a little tight.” He grit his teeth together and let his leg bounce as the man moved closer locking him down from running away, “What are-”

It dissolved into a groan as Twice pushed his bleeding stump up, “Keep it up Mr. Compress.”

“Shut up Twice.” Sako grumbled as Twice gently this time helped him stand up and start to move. The arm was still in great pain and was throbbing dully.

“Can you walk?” Twice asks again more force in his voice as he goes back to supporting Sako.

Sako nods and mumbles out, “I can walk, I’m fine.”

Toga was talking to Shigaraki who had to be held back from chucking a dagger at the gangsters, “Stop looking for revenge and we have to get moving everyone come-”

Shigaraki looked at the fresh blood splatter that was very recently big sis. Twice was still moving with the teammate that was still with them as they were at the door. Shigaraki saw Toga running to catch up but he stopped and saw the card by his foot. Looking at it carefully, it was a show of power, and what that to of date gangster said made sense. They needed his resources or to remove the competition.

One last glance at the group leaving was enough to show their motivation for this assignment. He was slower moving towards Magnes gear and gently moved the magnet away from the pooling blood placing his hand on her pants letting her not be bound in half a body, letting her be free. Just as she wanted all along. In the fading distance he heard Twice swear and he knew he should be there for the shaken team as well.

“Fucking come on Mr Compress!” Twice was frantic more so than usual, and hearing it all set in for Sako as he was panting and having trouble keeping up. Twice kept up an unforgiving pace as he half dragged half carried him.

“Twice slow… down.” Sako asked hoping the mans first name would get him to listen, “Jin.”

Twice gently shook his head and just grasped Sako under the arm and pushed forwards. Toga was right beside him and moved ahead of the pair pushing against the door, “Twicey be nice to him.”

Jin looked ahead but Toga and Sako could see the worried glances and Sako knew that this was being done for his own good. He just had to keep telling himself that as they moved. With no Dabi there was no quick fix to these injuries it seemed. Though Sako did hate to be reliant on those high school dropouts even when they are nice to an old man like himself. They had better sense to themselves too it seems.

Shigaraki caught up with them and saw Toga with her phone out she was getting Giran to tell them where to take Sako but Twice looked like he knew where he was going, “Come on Compress, a few more blocks then you can rest for a bit.”

Twice looked as he heard leather scraping on the pavement glancing to see Sako was practically leaning on him head dropping as Jin dragged him. Jin say Sako’s hat drop off his head and he knew more action had to be taken, “Sako! Sako come on.”

Jin stopped and gently tried re-arranging Sako so he could start to pick him up. Shigaraki saw Jin stop and scratched the side of his neck, “You can’t stop he is losing too much blood Twice hurry the fuck up!”

Jin almost thought about flipping his boss off but then decided against it as Sako was needing him more. He slipped his hand under the man's leg and knew that under any other circumstance there might have been a bridal style joke for them being a couple but no one really felt like cracking a joke. Jin started running with Sako in his arms not caring what was happening to his suit or even his mask at this point.

“Toga run ahead tell them we got an emergency!”

Toga nodded and was just barely outpacing Twice who was running hearing the man groan in his arms and muttering to himself.

“I can walk, I’m fine he says. Fucking idiot!”

Shigaraki moved ahead knowing right now there was no way to fix this problem by him lagging behind. It was not like he could help carry Compress, if he slipped up one bit then they would be down <em>another- they would be down another person today and it would be his fault.</em> He sniffled and gently pushed father out of his face to rub angrily at his nose with his sleeve shoving the hand in his kangaroo pouch grabbing other hands off his coat so they would not draw extra attention.

Jin made sure Sako’s remnants of an arm was pointing up the tape measure was leaving an indent in the skin but it was helping slow down the blood flow. Though not enough it seemed. Jins tone was even quieter somehow looking down he whispered to the unconscious man, “You can't go now. Curtains not closing yet. Please don't leave Sako.”

Sako did vaguely hear Jin. Some part that was trying to not be a damn damsel in distress but fuck did this hurt. He tilted his head so it was not lolling like a corpse and looked up at Jin then sae the arm, “Overhaul had quite a magic trick Jin don't you say?”

“Yes that bastard has a quirk alright.” Jin nodded. He was glad Sako was up for talking at this point. He stopped when he felt Sakos good arm grab him, “Sako what-?”

“We have to talk to him again.”

“What!” Twices voice rang out as he slowed down wondering if Sako was already getting delusional, “We have to go back!”

“I seem to have lost my hat Jin.” Sako said giving a smile that was not going to show under the mask, nor world the grimace of pain from moving. Though the gasp and arched back seemed to show that.

Jin let out some nervous laughter that edged on crying at this point as he picked up pace, “Toga lost it.”

Toga hearing her name looked back at Twice and Compress and saw that Compress was awake at this point heading back to the pair as Shigaraki ran ahead, “Hey whats the-”

Mr. Compress heard the girl and looked over and saw his hat in her hands and stared at it dumbly for a few seconds before trying to shift in Twice’s arms and let out a shriek of agony as he processed what just happened to his arm feeling a sickening bile rising up in his throat. He leaned back into Twice his legs trying to move to free himself but that writhing only brought more pain to him. He swallowed and felt Twice hold him closer to stop him from moving to some extent. He saw blinding light as Twice removed his mask his comfort but he guessed it was for vitals or something.

“Almost there Sako. Then you can rest. Just a bit further you moron-” Jin kept up the mantra but Sako couldn’t hear it anymore. There was shouting and a lot more going on than he hoped for. The place they were supposed to go was closed. Sako felt Jins hands wrap around him more pulling him painfully close.

A few more shouts then they were off again Shigaraki leading the charge. Spinner running into traffic trying to get someone to get out of the car. Twice was quicker in going to the side of the car and breaking the window with his elbow a flick of the wrist had the measuring tape around someones neck and he pulled till there was no more problem. Togaw was reaching in the window to get the car locks. Shigaraki and Spinner argued on who got to drive but none of that mattered.

Sako to be safe Jin positioned him between his thighs and held him there as Spinner started to drive off. Sakos arm in the air and Sako felt his heartstrings pull a bit. Being jostled slightly back and forth was the only reason he was awake at all. He grabbed onto Jins suit the fabric straining under the nails his glove lost some time ago, Twi-”

“Shh shhh keep up your strength Mister C.” Twice communicates slowly his mask off and he looks down. He sees Jin mouth something then shove the mask back on.

Sako let his eyes close as his vision swam, “I don’t want to die.”

The car went oddly quiet after that. Sako heard his heartbeat flush with the world as he focused on breathing and holding onto Twice. Spinner focused on the road and Shigaraki stopped his commentary. Toga who was curled up in the corner of the car found something to look to in the distance. No one wanted to let that happen but they had their limits they were afraid Sako was at his.

Sako felt warm breath on him the hands moved to hold him closer, “It’s okay. I got you.” Sako felt the hug deepen, his head sinking to the crook of Jins arm. This might not have been the best way to go, but it would not be the worst.

“You are going to be alright. I promise Sako.” Jin said to the man who couldn’t hear now.

He was in and out of conscience as he was rushed to some blinding white room and felt them stick him with something before waking up in a dingy motel room on a bed with most of the mess pushed to the side of the room.

He still felt woozy but he had no idea what day or time it was because the blinds were down on him. He slowly tried to sit up but halfway through he saw one hand out of the corner of his eye and decided to lay back down. A few minutes later he heard noise on the other side of the door he could feel his quirk in his arm again. Just the one arm though. He let out small cough before speaking up, “Hello?”

He heard the noise from the other room and the door handle slowly opened, “Your asleep? Awake?”

“I do think I am at least.”

It was good to have a normal Twice conversation at least. The door opened and Sako saw through his mask to see Twice in a plain tank top and pants of a sorts. Blonde hair with an almost alarming scar that was supposedly hidden under that mask of his. Twice often left little to the imagination with that spandex suit, but he was glad the other man had some muscle to be able to have carried him.

Twice carried him to the hospital then the car to a different hospital, he remembered that, he started to look away from Twice but the man spoke up trying to get him talking, “Well you need the rest. It's important Mr. Compress that you get some rest.”

He had never seen Twice so distressed before. And never thought that the loud personality from the day previous could be quiet. Though it was nice but he didn't need his team worrying about him. He was a grown man at least. He pushed at the blankets and deftly moved to the right hand side standing up and then sitting back down as the blood rushed to his head.

Twice looked somehow even more worried but went down to his knees and looked up at Sako. He decided to talk first, “Twice. I just woke up I think I might be able to do something.”

They both had a moment of silence before Twice looked away, “Pushing yourself is not going to help Sako.”

“Are we going by last names now Bubaigawara?” It was formal for the both of them as professionals, and not whatever last night was. He broke being professional when be called the man Jin but that was a spur of the-? Twice was talking, and here he was zoning out.

“- it is fine if you want to say Jin instead. Bit easier to say.” Jin ended off the statement with a scratch on the back of his head. Sako might have blamed what whatever he should have been given but Jin almost looked nervous.

“Jin. How long have I been out?”

Those grey eyes met his own and then Sako almost on instinct looked away seeing some makeshift IV stand he followed the little line to his wrist and then found his way to look back at Jin, “How long?”

“About thirteen hours since you made it to the doctors, ten hours since I brought you here.” Jin admits plainly standing up almost looking like he was about to bite his tongue, “Lie, back, down.”

Slow and calculated words, nothing like the Twice he had come to know. Was it all an act he put on? Sako knew he was not the only one to wonder that when they heard him focus on a subject and the statements he made were added in like he remembered he did that. Though the worry and the reminder of what happened coupled with the blood beginning to pound in his ears again he had to agree with Jin. He saw Jin fiddle with some of the supplies.

“What are you doing Jin?”

“Just... trying to get you some relief.”

It was working. Sako felt the bit of relief that was given to him from the drug cocktail but it was a simple muscle relaxant at this point but anything more and it would have been knocking him out. He let out a sigh, “Jin would it be possible to get something to eat?”

Jin was damn near silent in his own home Sako guessed since Jin got up and left the room. How different this man was… Sako didn’t want to be zoning out but it was guessed to be expected since he- he gulped and looked to his left. There is wasn’t it. His arm was gone.

He felt his a stub and nearly threw up whatever was left in his stomach. His mind started to race and he wished he had his mask or was able to put it on easily if he could do it at all. No. He had to get those thoughts out of his mind but he would have to confront them sooner rather than later. Staring straight ahead he almost found the courage to chance looking at it again but then Jin walked in with some dark toast with probably too much butter on it.

“Thank you Jin for this.” Sako almost let a dramatic tear fall from his eye as he saw the toast was cut into little triangles, “This is adorable.”

“No problem Sako just glad to help.” Jin glares not at Sako but around the man and Sako does pick up on those subtle movements.

Before he could ask anything Jin stands up and leaves. It was different being left alone, it really was no matter how Sako put it, this made him realize how much Twice was often in the leagues faces in a good way. The man was close and full of energy but Sako knew something was different here but accepted that as Jin’s personal life.

Sako finished the food quickly. He was hungrier that he had known but as he was just down an arm not paralyzed in bed he could go and get some food with Jins help. There was a moment's pause when he stood up and removed the IV from his arm and despite feeling woozy he moved to the door, reaching across his body to open the door as he turns the doorknob.

The door opened and the smell of mid price smokes wafted to him as he scanned the dirty other room. Strewn all over the room were some beer can, mostly filled ashtrays, some chaos of general disorganization from someone living there. Permanently without getting cleaners to service the place. He saw Jin’s back as the man looked out the window, “Jin?”

The man turned around at Sako, “You’re up. How are you feeling?”

Sako was surprised to see Jin with the mask on in his own home. Sako looked at Jin with some wonderment as he took a step back to the other room, “Are we about to be attacked?”

Jins eyes widened as he looked back out to the street, then to Sako, “Yeah we are under attack. No we are safe why you asking Sako?” There was confidence and confusion in the mans words and this was the Jin that he had known. The Jin with the mask.

“I must still be out of it, sorry for causing concern.”

Jin was moving closer to Sako and started to gently ask what Sako needed pulling the mask down. Jin cleared part of the only other sitting space and tossed about what Sako guessed was the only other clean article in the apartment over the area as it was instantly covered with reammants with soot, “Thank you Jin for this.”

Jin placed down some chopped microwavable meal so that it only needed a single hand to eat with. He watched Jin go back to a smoke and look out to the street again. Was this what he did in the morning, or was it all day. The difference was still astounding him or it was the only thing he could focus on at his point. When Jin turned on the television to have background noise to some sitcom. Sako kept watch as Jin pulled another smoke eventually rolling his mask off after the second smoke finished he tried to start a conversation with him desperate to talk and distract himself.

“Why are you so quiet at home?”

Jin looked at Sako and let out a small sigh, “It’s pretty loud here most times. Don’t stop talking most mornings. Just keep up the conversations as it happens.”

“Are you always alone Jin?” Sako asked and as the words came out of his mouth he wished he hadn’t have asked. His mask hid his face but Jin’s managed to show everything he was thinking.

“Better this way, place is barely meant for one permanent resident it’s worse here.”

What Jin said was right, he almost fell off the bed and Jin was leaning against the counter while Sako had the only seat in the room. He wanted to ask Jin more but there was a distinct look on the mans face that it was not something to talked about though the conversation was here, “Well what is in the area at least?”

“Few things a nice shop or two. It’s horrible everything thats happening, fake little gangs getting on the leagues coattails. We have inspired the masses and now they are trying to make it big but we- we got to… sort through them better.” Jin was animated for a moment before the understanding of his words got to him, “We will sort through them better I swear.”

“Jin which part of the city do you used to live in?”

Jin started to look anxious at the questions into his past and before he could say something. Sako waved some toast crust in front of him, “I am sorry. Just want to distract myself. Do you have anything you want to talk about?”

Jin thought for a few moments about what they could do right now and then just shrugged, “I am not as loud outside the league. But we can try to find a common ground, like any movies?”

Ahhh, yes. The commonplace that people love to talk about, movies and other little nonsensical things that can make a person up. Though he did not think that was anything good for him to start with, Sako let it slide.

“I often watch theater performances when I am not attending to league or personal business. I guess you find it easier to walk about because you often have that mask of yours on as you do league work. Though I do think I can hide a bit now from heroes, they are looking for two handed villains.” Sako saw the crestfallen look on Jins face before he realized the statement he said. There was a moment he thought that whatever was given to him was nice and it felt nice. He looked away, “Gallows humor I suppose is already hitting me.”

“Sako just take things easy. Though theater would be your thing I suppose.” Jin responds taking the mask off his face to be open, “Musical theater?”

“If you are asking if I like the sound of mucus, I can tell you the answer is no. Though some smaller musicals are more my taste. I do not like big budget sing alongs.” Sako smiles as he sees Jin move to the small movie cabinet.

“I have a recorded copy of chess.” Jin offers to Sako who raised his eyebrows, “It is some political drama with music and chess games it's horrible bullshit.”

Sako still had no idea why Jin said things wrong and at some part it worried him but that was because the distressed look that passed over Jins face as well at the statement was not usually a way to make someone at ease, “I think a show would be nice. And thank you for this Twice.”

“Just youtube old man.” Twice says scratching at his neck a bit much rubbing it raw. He dropped the hand.

Sako could say that the man was a silent film to watch. The scar suggest tragedy, something that could have been better. The lifestyle said drama, to thriller. Romantic at heart? Sako shook his head and nearly tapped his stub to his head as he was about to massage his temple. He was remembering last night that was not something he wanted to remember. Or did he?

Jin got the laptop set up had a wire for it to plug into the screen so it was a bit bigger. He pulled out a smoke and lit it to used to many days of his morning ritual. The sounds filtered in gently as Sako watched Twice look at the world. Mask on and off his head. This is a good distraction until things can change.

Sako leaned back and knew there is time to do many things like get the arm. Possibly a bit more food, and discover whatever happened to Jin Bubaigawara to make him into this man of today.

[alphaabucky]

MY, Omega - Bucky Barnes x Reader (5/?)

It’s been far too long since I've added to this series so I hope yous like this next instalment! :)

PARTS / 1 / 2 / 3 / 4 / 5 

Warnings - A/B/O Dynamics, swearing, sexy stuff, idk what else 

You skipped down the hallway, humming to yourself your favourite song as you made your way to the mess hall; the smell of French toast, oatmeal and everything else filling your nostrils and almost already putting you in a food coma, your eyes fluttering closed as a smile curled on your face in sheer bliss.

“What’s got you in such a good mood?” Natasha laughed as you skipped toward the ‘alpha table’ pulling a chair out for you to plop yourself onto, the pheromones you were emitting almost blocked out the smell of the food that was being prepared barely a few feet away across from the table. As you sat down you could feel the glare from the surrounding omegas, most likely questioning your worth, questioning why that you were being cared for by not just one, but seemingly ALL the Alphas, questioning everything and anything; this didn’t bother you much anymore, this all being anything but abnormal to you. You didn’t answer Nat’s question, only shrugging your shoulders as you plucked a grape from the bunch on her plate, placing it between your soft lips before sucking on it - it making a pop sound as it went in your mouth. “I’m always like this” you smiled, going to reach for another grape but Nat quickly slapping your hand away and rolling her eyes. “I’m pretty sure you’re lying, and that the reason Miss ‘I’m never always this happy’ is so joyful right now is making his way over here” she chuckled, raising her eyebrows and nodding her head in the direction of the god-like-built alpha that was making his way towards the table. You didn’t have to look to know who she was talking about, you could smell him from a couple miles away, his strong aura and his natural scent was strong enough to disintegrate any other opposing alpha scents in order to gain the high power of the pack.

Last night you had barely slept, you were kept awake thinking of all the possible reasons why James Buchanan Barnes, the alpha every omega lusts for, is lusting for you? Within 24 hours of knowing of one another he had already tried to mark you, in attempt to claim you but failing miserably and biting the wrong gland and his jealousy burning through everything in his path when something isn’t how he wants it; and his odd approach to asking you to be his when he demanded you to not rut with Tony anymore.

You had thought about what you would do, or more like what you should, do.

Like you obviously have a criteria on what you would want for a mate, when it came to physicality though Bucky had most definitely surpassed your ideals and sat himself quite proudly at the godly scale of hotness. But personality is what you’re stumped at, would he care for you? Be soft and warm towards you but cold and stone towards other omegas? Would he be the ‘perfect ideal man’ that every human seems to want? You don’t know. Hence you felt the need to put him through some.. trails? Trial and error. Was this morally wrong?

Probably.

But he’s had his fun, surely this gives you the green light to have your own right?

Bucky took the seat across from you “g’mornin’” he nodded towards Natasha and she replied with a lazy salute; everyone surrounding you could feel the accepting scents of yours and Bucky’s, how it complimented each other and combined into one of the most intoxicating scents in the compound, if the other omegas weren’t already wanting your head for taking away their precious alpha, my god they most definitely do now. You sneakily stole another grape from Nat’s plate, placing it between your lips again as you rested your arms on the table and your chin in your palm, batting your eyelashes at Bucky as you repeated what you did before, popping the grape into your mouth. “Sleep well, Doll? Dreamt of me again?” He smirked, he was uncharacteristically over confident today... he grabbed the unusually large bowl and began indulging in the oatmeal he chose to eat for breakfast. You snickered, rolling your eyes at him. “You wish, I dreamt about my time with Tony.. it was hot. Must do it again sometime.” You giggled to yourself, getting up from your seat, trailing your fingers up his tense bicep as you walked past him, noticing the hint of red illuminating his eyes.

You heard a growl erupt from the alpha table just as you got to the doors of the hallway, pheromones of rage encasing around you and daring you to turn around, you were scared? If he was your mate, would you want to be scared of him?

Lost in your thoughts you didn’t notice the heavy footsteps coming from behind you, nor did you notice the vice-like grip on your wrist before Bucky reached for your waist, turning you around and grabbing the back of your thighs “it’s in your best interest to jump” he growled in your ear, his hot breath fanning over your neck as his teeth grazed along your skin, causing a shiver to cascade down your spine; you did as he said, his hands now firmly gripped on your hips as he turned and pushed the doors open with his back, leaving the mess hall full of angry, envious omegas, glares burning into the back of your head... and Natasha was left there too. “Come on what takes alpha’s so long to get up.” She huffed, checking her watch and pondering how long Steve would take to fix his hair before he came to the mess hall; looking around her she wasn’t fond of being the new prey under the predatory gaze of the omega’s, all their attention now on her since their ‘main boo’ had left.

“Would you all stop staring at me like starved vultures stalking its prey? You all are making an alpha feel uncomfortable” She shuddered as she watched all the omegas blush in embarrassment and turn away. “Speak of Mr. Perfect Hair.” She waved at Steve smiling “Y/N is playing with Buck” she chuckled as he warily took the seat opposite of her. “Sounds like Y/N”  Steve joined in with the laughter, stealing a grape from Nat like you did before.

“Oh my god what is it with you people stealing my grapes?!”

Bucky kicked his bedroom door open, almost breaking it off its hinges and then kicking it shut with even more strength if that was even possible. “Did you say that just to rile me up? Grind my gears?” He growled as he dropped you onto his bed, still comfortably positioned between your legs. “You want me to lie?” You answered, innocently biting your lip and causing another animalistic growl to come from him. He started to attack your neck, sucking on the soft flesh as his fingers fumbled with the fabric of your shirt, slipping his hands underneath the thin fabric and running his fingers along your skin and up and down your torso. “I want you now..” he hummed as he ran his hands over your covered breasts as he nipped at your collarbone, goosebumps on your skin rapidly rising as your body reacted to all of his motions; both of you were perfectly in sync with each other, this wasn’t normal, how long had it been since you first met? A week? 2?

“Clearly” you breathed heavily, reaching for the hem of his shirt and pulling at it as a signal for him to take it off. Standing up and moving away from you made you almost miss the way his skin was so warm against yours, you pouted your lips as you watched him smirk down at you, knowing very much well that you wanted him, he was enjoying this way too much; Bucky practically ripped off his shirt, keeping the eye contact with you as he reached down his pants, stroking himself as he enjoyed the sight of you laying on his bed with your legs wide open. Throwing his head back and taking a deep breathe in through his nose he smelt the strong pheromones you were emitting, clearly telling him how much you wanted him to make you his as much as he wanted to. Getting on his knees he kissed your feet and slowly made his way up, making sure to leave open mouthed kisses on every bit of skin he came by, subtly nipping at the skin of your inner thighs as he got closer and closer to where he wanted to be and to where you began to need him to be.

“Didn’t know you were such a giver..” you sighed in contempt, reaching to his head and running your fingers through his soft hair, pulling at it softly earning another growl from him. “I’m not..” he chuckled, reaching for the waistband of your shorts and pulling them down. “And to think you let Tony of all people to see all this first...” he mumbled to himself, admiring the skin he uncovered as he pulled the shorts away from you and throwing them away to god knows where.

As he returned to his previous position, admiring your covered heat, you moved your foot to his shoulder and pushed him away slowly. “Doll?” “Why do you want me?” You asked, him now standing up in front of you, your foot still on his shoulder to make sure he stays put. He laughed a little, thinking of this as some sort of weird joke. “Come on Doll, I don’t need to answer that.” His smile fading as he noticed your facial expression didn’t falter. “Just because Tony’s scent is still on me? That’s why you want me? Can’t handle that another alpha made his way into me before you could?” You questioned, moving your foot away from him as you sat up.

He stayed silent, there were so many reasons why he wanted you, not just for the rut but for you to be his, his mate, his everything, but his ‘bad-boy’ facade and stone faced aura is stopping him from being what he knew you wanted him to be. “You may be some so-called sex god that every omega lusts for but being a mate means so much more, for me anyways.” You stood, grabbing your shorts from where he threw them and pulled them back on. “Show me you care, and then I’ll consider being your mate. But so far all I know is that you’re a jealous ass that wants nothing but power and a different omega to play with every night.” You shrug, going on your tip toes and leaving a chaste kiss on his lips.

“And a little hint.” You turned to him before leaving his room. “Step one is, stop fucking every omega you see. It turns me off when your scent is everywhere like an airborne disease” you chuckle, closing the door behind you as you left him dumbfounded.

PLEASE gimme some feedback :)

tags

@freehoagiehairdopeach @allyp1023 @deanskitten @xxqueenofdemonsxx @rice-is-love-rice-is-life @nerdywitch @sexyvixen7 @mazda098 @ek823 @palaiasaurus64 @voidjillybean @chipilerendi @melinatabea @moonlight53 @msiilpl @thatawkwardtinyperson @danceperson @kaaatniss @starstar1012 @avahodge @theinsidefeelingofateen @whatdoyxumean @dragonluver9393 @scooby-doo-pooh @whydoanything1@mystruggledlife @bekah814 @koizorahana  @ivylover2 @rainbowkisses31 @unicornsxfandoms

[cas-backwards-tie]

Something New

Jason Todd x Reader + Damian

Request:  they go to a carnival or somewhere or a mall or a pet cafe with Titus,  doing a mother and son bonding kind of thing or family bonding! and then Damian starts to act like a normal kid, being excited and all without knowing it himself and when he does he gets all embarrassed and 'these are for kids' 😭😭👌❤ and maybe if they're doing family bonding Jason responds 'but you ARE a KID'. OH THEY CAN ALSO MAYBE TRY SOMETHING NEW, IDUNNO, THAT CAUSES DAMIAN TO MAKE WEIRD FACES XD maybe like, weird foods? I'M A TOTAL FOODIE CANT HELP IT XD I'M SORRY FOR THE SPAM, I just love the idea Damian being fluffy and cuddly- I LOVE KIDS they're so cutee.

Warnings: None?

A/N: This is for you @thatawesomenerdygirl, and literally I’m in such a Jason mood today! Also, if you haven’t seen a street carnival before, they do them a lot in Bolivia around the holidays so that’s what I’m referring to. I swear I’ve been to this carnival in Bolivia. Also, I was imaging Jason in this outfit from @inkydandy ‘s beautiful comic.

Despite everyone shipping me with Dick, I still love Jason <3 (I love Dick too)

“I can’t believe I actually got the both of you to go ice-skating! All because of that one comment.” You laugh whole-heartedly, clutching your stomach as you make sure your hat stays atop your head.

“Well, you weren’t wrong... ice-skating does require balance and skill.... something only a trained assassin would be able to easily maneuver.” Damian says cockily as a big grin displays itself across his face. Gripping Titus’ leash a little tighter Jason gives him a glare, soon turning into a smirk.

“One... why do you always have to talk like that? and, easily maneuver? You fell down literally almost thirty times!” Jason laughs, ending up with Damian giving him a death stare.

“You fell down just as much as me! Y/N had to hold your hands the whole time!” You try to contain your laughter as it was true... you really did have to hold Jason’s hands the whole time, which was really cute if you were being honest... however, Jason didn’t think this was cute considering his little brother learned to skate all on his own.

“Hey, hey! Let’s not fight, okay? It’s a nice day and okay, yeah... you both failed and fell a LOT, but whatever... you should’ve seen me the first time I went ice-skating, I fell down probably the same amount of times as well as held the railing the whole time” you joke, hoping to distract them.

“Really?” Damian asks with a child-like curiosity and intrigue. 

“Yeah! It was hilarious! Well.... not for me, but still... it takes practice, just like anything else.” You guys walk a little further with questions and small talk few and far between.

“Hey, look! Damian, have you ever had a funnel cake?” You nudge his side as you gesture with your head to the little street carnival a few yards away at the other side of the park.

“Funnel cake? What’s tha-”

“Remember when Grayson made us all go to the circus with him? And he gave you that dough-thing with powdered sugar and chocolate? that’s a funnel cake.” Jason explains as we walk down the fork of the path which leads to the small booths set up randomly along the path.

You were stumped. You wanted to get Damian to try something else new today, but what else was there... you looked at the signs and eventually you found it! “Okayyyy... BUT, have you tried fried oreos?” Jason raises a brow at you in question. Damian looks at you incredulously, as if you had suggested the most disgusting thing in the world.

“Fried... oreos?” Jason pulls his hat a bit further down, over his ears.

“Yeah... they sound gross, trust me- my friend had to practically force me to try them but they’re actually pretty good. Plus! We can get hot chocolate or apple cider or something.” You suggest as you take Damian’s hand and lead him over to the food booth.

“Why don’t you go pick out a table?” You grab quite a few napkins before stuffing them in Damian’s hands, shooing him over to the plastic picnic tables which stood in rows under another tent.

“I’ll pay.” Jason places Titus’ leash in his other hand while he fishes around in his coats pocket. Taking out his wallet he asks the man ‘how much’, before he pays. 

“Does your dog like treats?” an young women says as she stops in front of you, having interrupted her run judging by her outfit.

“Uh... yeah?” You’re skeptical, and hope this isn’t someone trying to poison Titus.

“Can I give him a treat? I just bring treats with me when I run because people always bring there dogs here.” She gestures to her fanny pack and unzips it, pulling out a small ziplock bag.

“Uh....” you look back at Jason who was chatting with the man inside the little kitchen as you waited for the food. “Sure” you offer a small shrug as you figure ‘why not?’. Everyone in Gotham isn’t a bad person.

The lady places the treat down in front of Titus, who just looks at it. “You can eat it Titus,” you chuckle lightly as he gives in, chomping up the small jerky-like treat the lady had placed on the ground. Titus licks his lips when he’s finished and looks up at the lady, wagging his tail subtly. “Thank you,” you smile at the woman, bidding her goodbye.

“Yeah, of course! I just like doing something for the dogs, you know?” She gives a soft smile before waving back and jogging off. Turning around you’re faced with Jason turning around with a paper plate in his hand. 

“Can you get the drinks?” He asks before gripping Titus’ leash a little tighter.

“Yeah, of course.” You give him a quick kiss on the cheek as you grab the drinks. Watching Jason blush even a little was the most heart-warming gift you could receive as you flustered him, walking ahead of him you make it to the picnic table Damian seemed to be waiting at impatiently. “Did you make a friend?” 

You laugh as you watch a baby sitting two tables away smiling at Damian with goo-goo eyes. Damian stares right back at the baby, not hesitating as he inspects it. “No... but they won’t stop staring! It’s kind of creepy.”

“So... Mr. J isn’t creepy but a baby is?” Your face contorts with an amused sort of confusion.

“I never said he wasn’t creepy, pleeeassee... he’s SO so creepy, but this baby...” Damian scrunches his nose in disgust.

“Do you really hate babies that much? What if you had a niece or nephew?” You question, sliding Damian’s apple cider towards him from across the table.

Jason chokes on his own drink as your eyes widen, whipping your head towards him. “Are you okay?” You reactively pat him on the back lightly. 

“Y-yeah...” Jason clears his throat before looking down at Titus and giving him a few pats on the head.

“Anyways, these are actually really good so everyone has to try one!” You watch and wait to take your own as Jason grabs one with no hesitation while Damian cautiously grabs one, inspecting it.

“Fried... oreos?” You nod at him, waiting for him to take a bite, “And it’s good...?” You nod again, encouraging him to go on.

You reach to grab your own as Damian slowly raises the ball to his mouth. As you reach to grab your own, Jason is reaching for his second and you just look at him giggling. “See, Damian? They’re good.” Looking from Jason to Damian you see Damian take his first bite, his face contorting to disgust.

“Do you not like it?” You feel a bit of minuscule guilt wash over you like a wave at having somewhat forced him to eat it.

“I don’t think I really tasted it.” Damian takes another bite, chewing it his face turns into one of contemplation, then to a surprised ‘not half bad’ frown as he nods his head. “They’re alright... they’re pretty good.” Damian gives his approval, leaving you to eat your own.

Walking along the booths Damian sees a dart game, “OOH! Can we play Y/N, pleeeasse?” Damian begs.

...Since when does Damian beg? What the hell? Okay... “Yeah, sure!” you reply cheerily as you race to the nearby tent, Titus running way faster than you, almost working you rather than the other way around. 

Once you’ve paid for your game Jason finally gets to the tent, standing between you and Damian. “Jason can play the winner, yeah?” You turn to Damian before you start throwing your darts, Damian already focused on the target. “Only if you want to” You turn to tell him.

“Okay... sure” You watch Jason smile before turning back to start your game. Going up against two trained vigilantes who can easily throw a batarang at a target more than five feet away, or even shoot a man from a ten yards away.... yeah... not your best challenged you’d set yourself up for, but it was more for fun than for the idea of winning.

“I won! I won!” Damian jumps up and down excitedly. The man asks Damian what small prize he’d like, and he looks up contemplating.

Damian picks out a stuffed baby Charmander as the man gives it to him he hugs it tight. “Those are for kids, Damian” Jason taunts, trying to get him to give a reaction in return.

“Uh-huh, okay Todd... you’re on.” Damian sets baby Charmander on the ledge of the booth and asks the man how to get the REALLY big stuffed animals.

Both of the boys take their time throwing their darts, Damian has his game face on as he hits the bullseye every time. “I won! Again!” Damian cries as the man asks which stuffed animal he wants this time. 

Jason grumbles to himself at the loss, figuring it’d be easy to beat his little brother. “Hey... if you really wanted the prize you can ask Dami to get it for you.” You smile at him, teasing him. 

Damian ends up getting a teddy bear three times his size which Jason has to carry on his back for him as Damian takes Titus, while I take Damian’s little Charmander. “And you said that they were for kids.” Damian scoffs.

“but you ARE a kid! And who said I wasn’t? I’ll always be a kid, right Babe?” Jason turns and kisses you chastely while still walking.

“Right!” You say cheerily, happy with how the day had gone.

You loved seeing Damian get to be a kid, as it always brought out the best parts of him, but you also loved seeing Jay get to be childish too... in a good way because sometimes he forgets the good things in life, and you’re determined to show him the good, little things every single day for as long as you live.

[sqideychelle]

Expect the Unexpected - Chapter 2

Pink’s a Nice Color on You

Work Summary: Harley’s been living on his own for three years now; after coming home from school one day to see both his mother and sister gone. No word, no note. He stayed there for a whole week - until he ran out of food to eat - and there was still no sign of either woman. He tried contacting Tony as a last resort, but never heard anything back (which he later finds out is because he wrote the wrong address down).AKA where Tony fosters Harley, and Harley meets Harry - all while trying to not stumble over his words - at Tony and Pepper’s wedding reception.

CH. 1 |  CH. 3

Read it on Ao3: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14378034?view_full_work=true

Harry was normally very good at talking to people, whether it be for something at Oscorp regarding his dad or doing presentations in school, it didn’t bother Harry. But Harley? The kid with the bright blue eyes and too much hair for his head? That’s the one that stumps Harry. His mouth is dry and he’s desperately trying to make conversation, even if he couldn’t read how the younger man felt about him yet. He just couldn’t get himself to believe that he was letting Harley get to him. He really hoped it wasn’t obvious.

Dinner came and went, the table reducing to Michelle and Peter mostly talking back and forth, with the occasional input from Ned or Harry. Harley stayed mostly silent, the most sound Harry hearing from him being the occasional breath of air exhaling from his nose, as if to laugh. But it just couldn’t properly come out. Harry was also silently praying that Peter would just finally make a move with Michelle tonight. They were clearly into each other, but despite Harry repeatedly telling Peter that, the most Peter ever did was a cheek kiss - which was extremely awkward and something they refuse to talk about - on the night of homecoming last month. But they were seniors now and prom would come up in just a few months. He really hoped Parker wouldn’t screw it up. They clearly worked well together.

But Harry was focused less on the two of them and more about the predicament with his own feelings. More specifically, the predicament with the 16 year old sitting beside him. He was a Bisexual Disaster™. He turned his head to Harley, trying to not make it obvious as he watched him fiddle on his phone. His eyes squinted when Harley long pressed on the screen and held the speaker up to his ear, listening to something. He also watched the small smile that appeared on his face as he listened, glancing over to Tony at the main table. And then Harley noticed Harry. The younger quickly cleared his throat and moved the phone away from his ear.

“Just… Just a funny video.” he tried to excuse, cheeks flushing. Harry knew better than to actually believe him. His eyes weren’t even on the screen, it most likely wasn’t a video, but Harry tried to give him a reassuring smile. “So Peter told me you’re from Tennessee?” That subject made Harley a little uneasy, and Harry could tell with the way he shifted in his seat and averted his gaze. “Please don’t make the stupid ‘you’re the only ten I see’ joke.” Harley began, attempting to lighten the mood before he got into it. “Long story short, my dad left early on, my mom took my sister and never came back, I bounced around through shitty foster homes, and now I’m here.” Harley sensed a weird form of trust with Harry. Maybe it was because his trust in Peter was starting to build, and Harry was practically Peters best friend; they trusted each other.

“Wow.” Harry breathed out, leaning back in his chair. “And I thought having a dead mom and shitty dad were bad.” He offered Harley a small smile. “Different people have all sorts of issues.” Harley said simply with a shrug, but the corner of his mouth curled into a small smile. And Harry decided right then and there that that was his favorite look on Harley. His eyes seemed brighter - as if he was warming up to Harry - cheeks nearly permanently tinted pink.

“It wasn’t a video.” Harley said quietly after a moment and glanced around at the table, as if to make sure no one else was listening. “I just have trouble reading sometimes. Especially when there’s a lot of sounds happening around me.” he admitted, not really looking back to Harry again. “Peter helps me a lot sometimes. He’s really cool.” Harley smiled to himself, lifting his gaze to look to Harry. “Sorry about your mom, though. And your dad, too. Parents can be pretty hit or miss, I guess.” Harry waved him off, shaking his head. “She died when I was young, but I’ve just gotten used to my dad  by now. He drowns himself in company business. The typical thing single dads tend to do in order to somehow cope.” he paused. Was he rambling? Maybe he was telling Harley too much at once… He was going to screw this up. “Sorry, dark topic, I guess. Would you excuse me for a moment?” Harry didn’t wait for Harley to acknowledge his statement before he was up and walking to the bathroom, running a hand through the curls of his hair.

He leaned over the sink for a few moments, eventually deciding to turn the cold water on. He splashed some over his face and turned the water off before grabbing a paper towel to wipe himself up. He was terrible with meeting new people outside of publicity. Especially people he was trying to hit on. His brain just didn’t work the way he wanted it to, always resorting to dark humor in hopes of sparking some connection through humor. That’s how it happened with Peter, except Peter helped to find the good in things, and Harry stopped trying to hit on him as soon as he realized Peter wasn’t into him. But Harley was different. He carried similar baggage to Harry, and he didn’t know how to cope, or just handle, that kind of relationship.

Harley met eyes with Peter once Harry left and gave him a small shrug. He probably shouldn’t have pushed on the subject, which wouldn’t have made Harry leave like that. Harley would be lying if he said he wasn’t concerned,  but he wasn’t a fan of actually addressing romantic feelings he had for people. He just kind of went for it, thinking that maybe he would be into hookups more. But boy, was he wrong.

When Harry hadn’t returned in a couple minutes, Peter started to get up to check on him, but Harley stood quicker instead. “I’ll go check on him.” he said quickly and moved away from the table, fixing his tie as he went. He knocked on the bathroom - even though it wasn’t a single one - before opening it. He was met with Harry’s eyes - kind and understanding, yet something cold about them. “Uh… I’m really sorry for before.. I didn’t really - I wasn’t thinking.” Harley let the door shut, shrugging.

Harry looked over from the mirror and finished pushing a curl back, giving him a slight smile as he leaned against the counter. “No, it’s all good, Harley. No hard feelings I swear. Just remembered something else I had to do.” he lied, crossing his arms over his chest. The arms that Harley would’ve been very distracted by if it weren’t for him still processing the way his name sounded in Harry’s voice. He cleared his throat, glancing around. “You just remembered that you had to do something? Like… in here?” He could feel his cheeks heating up. He was terrible at this.

“For the company.” Harry grinned over at him, letting out a light laugh as he dropped his head. That only caused Harley to blush more, lowering his own gaze. “Right, well, I should probably head back out there.” But then Harry was crossing the space between them and grabbing his wrist with a light but determined grip. “You uh.. Red - no, pink. It’s a nice color on you.” he said quietly, eyes trailing from Harleys rosy cheeks to his neck, where the blush was rooted.

Harley really thought his heart was going to burst out of his chest at that moment. Harry had what, an inch on him? But his body was much broader, which made Harley feel smaller than he actually was. But it wasn’t a bad thing. Harley swallowed hard. He was a goner. “R-Really?” his voice cracked as he slowly brought his eyes to meet Harry’s. Harry nodded in response and released Harley’s wrist. His own heart was pounding. “Can I…?” he whispered, turning his body so he was more front on to Harley, fingers tracing up his jaw to cup his cheek. He didn’t have much time to think before Harley leaned up to kiss him, quick and innocent at first. Neither of them could believe this was really happening.

Harley pulled away almost as quickly as he leaned in, more shocked at himself. He was in a bathroom kissing the Harry Osborn. His first kiss was Harry Osborn. Harley barely had the time once he pulled away before Harry was pulling him back in, their lips still soft in the locking, but the passion behind it was much stronger. Harry had him up against the wall, using one of his hands to guide Harleys hands to his waist. Harley really was new to this, but he was eager. His responses kicked in and a soft noise came from Harleys mouth - a noise of want. He gripped the side of Harry’s shirt as his other hand snaked around his neck, pulling him close.

Harry grinned against his lips in between kisses. “Someone’s gonna --” “Shut up.” Harley cut him off once their lips parted for longer than a millisecond. “Bossy.” Harry hummed, pulling Harley in for another set of kisses. Harley felt drunk, in a way. Not that he’d ever been drunk, but every time they pulled away he couldn’t help but feel giddy - like it was bubbling in his chest. It was the happiest he’d felt in a long time. Even if it was just the surface of happiness. But Harley really should’ve listened to Harry and let him finish what he was saying - for minutes felt like seconds - and soon enough Peter was walking in to check on the both of them.

Peter’s eyes widened once he saw the two of them, the door not even opened all the way before he let it closed. “Holy -- Sorry!” Peter yelled, his cheeks burning as he moved away from the door and went back to the table. Michelle raised a brow at the look of him, Peter answering before she could speak. “Harry and Harley… they uh… the bathroom. Kissing. I walked in. Holy shit.” he breathed out, slowly sitting back down. “I didn’t even - did they know each other before this?” Michelle gave him a slight look, followed by an eyeroll. “Did you not see them trying to flirt? They’re both terrible, honestly.”

[ellanainthetardis]

Will Haymitch make it through today? Tell me your thoughts!

[ff] or [ao3]

Chapter 31 : What Do We Always Say?

Death tasted like damp earth and smelled like moss.

Pain exploded in his skull long before he even tried to open his eyelids. He moved his arm and couldn’t help a groan when it jostled his side.

Not dead, was his first conscious thought.

It was quickly followed by memories he would have preferred forgotten.

Johanna.

Katniss.

He stopped trying to move when he remembered that last part. Katniss was dead. Katniss was…

“Finally. Was starting to think you were brain damaged or something.”

He forced himself to open his eyes. It was dark, the only light coming from a fire in the center of what was unmistakably a cave with glistening walls. He was lying close enough to the flames to keep warm but not enough to get burned. It was cold anyway though and he could hear the sound of dripping water somewhere in the distance. There were also three dead spiders as big as small dogs piled up in one corner at the edge of the firelight.

A part of him hoped they were dead.

The biggest part didn’t care.

“You missed.” he croaked. His voice sounded rough and weak to his own ears.

Chaff stepped over his prone form to sit on the other side of the fire. His friend looked worse for the wear. He had lost the jacket somewhere – probably on him, Haymitch realized belatedly, because he was lying on some sort of fabric, his head was cushioned on something and he was covered with something else, he didn’t think he had his shirt on anymore, his skin felt exposed to the surrounding humidity. Eleven’s victor’s left sleeve was torn and there were several gashes leading from his elbow down to his stump. There were puncture marks on his neck too. White veins circled out of them like twisted spider webs on his dark skin.

“Yeah, well, what can I say?” Chaff snorted. “I’ve only got the one hand and you’ve got a thick skull.”

Haymitch snorted too but it was bitter and wrong. “Should have left me there.”

His friend ignored that. “I patched you up best as I could. Guess your ribs are cracked but not broken. Bloody lucky with that tree, buddy.” He closed his eyes at the reminder. He shouldn’t have moved. He should have left the trunk fall on him. Johanna could have finished him and… Chaff put an end to that train of thoughts. “Your team went a bit overboard with the medical supplies, you know.”

It was said in a light joking tone but it made Haymitch frown. He glanced down at his bandaged hand and then pushed the jacket that was covering him away, clenching his jaw against the pain. He was  bare-chested, a thick white elastic band was wrapped around his torso… He touched his forehead and his fingers found a band aid…

He met Chaff’s eyes over the fire but his friend remained flippantly neutral, simply nodding to the side where a silver parachute laid abandoned with small bottles that he supposed to be antiseptics.

Medical supplies were always the most expensive. This must have cost a fortune.

“You must have some sponsors lined up out there.” Eleven’s victor commented. “Impressive.”

He shook his head and closed his eyes again, bringing the jacket back up on his shivering body. “Probably leftovers from Katniss.”

“You know better.” Chaff retorted. “Your escort must have been working overtime.”

He shut his eyes tighter. He didn’t need the reminder. He didn’t need to think about what Effie had done to secure that much money. He had a good idea. Those things didn’t come cheap and even with Katniss’ leftover money and the few sponsors they probably had rooting for him… It didn’t add up. He could guess at what she had done to cover the expense. Sponsors or Gamemakers.

It made him seething mad.

Their dirty paws on his escort.

On his wife.

A waste too.

She shouldn’t have done that.

“She never knows when to quit.” he muttered.

“She can’t close deals by herself.” Chaff reminded him quietly. “The boy must have signed them. You know what that means, right?” Hopefully not. Effie wouldn’t have let Peeta compromise himself. Not even for him. A small pebble hit him in the shoulder and he groaned, opening his eyes to look at his friend since Eleven’s victor wanted his attention so badly. He was angry with Chaff, he realized. He had asked him to kill him, to help him and… “It wasn’t your fault.”

The words were like a bucket of icy water poured on his head.

“Sure.” he spat. “You can ask the boy’s opinion on that one if you get out of here. Promised him I would get his girl back to him. Worked out really well, yeah?”

“Don’t need to ask his opinion.” Chaff shrugged. “Trinket can’t close deals by herself. The kid’s sending you medical supplies. Take a hint, Haymitch. He’s not mad. He doesn’t blame you.”

He shook his head and got another pebble tossed at his shoulder for  his trouble. It was a bigger one and it annoyed Haymitch to no end. “Quit that.”

“Quit being an idiot, then.” Eleven’s victor shrugged.

“I killed Jo.” he snarled viciously, pushing on his bandaged hand to sit up. It was almost an accusation, a challenge. A dare for Chaff to tell him it was alright, that it didn’t count, that…

“I killed Blight.” Chaff offered. Haymitch blinked. He hadn’t expected that. His friend went on in a flat voice that didn’t do a good job at hiding just how disturbed he actually was. “Bastard tried to get a jump on me. Didn’t work out well for him.”

“Didn’t think he was the kind to go for a frontal attack.” he commented.

Eleven’s victor waved his stump. “A poisoned one-handed man walking around... He probably thought it would be easy. Too tempting.”

Haymitch’s grey eyes darted to the white marks on his friend’s neck at the word poisoned. It wasn’t a stretch to guess it had something to do with the dead spiders mutts in the corner. “How bad is it?”

“Spreading slow so far.” Chaff dismissed. “Slow but steady.” Eleven’s victor pulled down his shirt a little, showing more white poisonous webs spiraling down his collarbone. “My take is when it reaches my heart, I’m dead meat.”

“Better win fast.” Haymitch advised.

Dark eyes assessed him calmly. “Jo killed your girl. You killed Jo. It’s the game.”

He scoffed. “Killed Mags too.”

That got his attention. Chaff frowned but it was gone in a moment. “Killed Cecelia.” Haymitch did a double take at that and it was his friend’s turn to snort bitterly. “We reached the Cornucopia at the same time. Thought she was coming at me. Probably trying to run away, poor woman.” Chaff shook his head. “Couldn’t tell anymore. Stabbed her.”

Haymitch looked down at the fire. Was there anyone left in that arena who hadn’t done horrible things by now? Killed someone innocent?

“I promised I would get Katniss out.” he whispered.

“Well, it was a fucking stupid promise to make.” Chaff retorted. “She’s dead. Tributes die. The world still goes on spinning. Get over it, Haymitch. What do we always say?” He shook his head. The third pebble hit him in the head and he glared at his friend but the other victor looked nonplussed. “What do we always say?”

“Stay alive.” he grumbled. It was a fucking useless advice and a shitty line when it came to lifting his spirits. This wasn’t the typical innocent kids got murdered for nothing scenario. This was a lot more personal. This was… “Maybe I don’t want to. Maybe I’m tired.”

“We’re all tired.” Chaff scowled. “You think your boy isn’t tired? Can swear he is. His girl’s dead and yet he’s still out there making deals for you. You think Trinket’s not tired?” He reached behind his back, got something off his belt and tossed it at him over the fire. It fell flat in the dirt in front of Haymitch. A knife. Not any knife but his knife. The knife he had won his Quell with. The knife he had left with Effie to give to Katniss. A reminder. “Came with the medical supplies. I’m guessing you get the message.”

Fight. Survive. Find a way.

He rubbed his face, exhausted down to his bones.

“You’ve got people out there looking out for you, trying to get you home to them.” Chaff went on, almost harsh now. “Now, you want to spit on that, you want to give up, you go out there and find Cashmere or Enobaria ‘cause I’m not going to do the work for you. Get yourself killed for all I care. But decide ‘cause I can’t afford an ally with a death wish.”

Chaff stood up swiftly and strode out in the dark tunnel that Haymitch figured led outside, leaving him alone with his tormented conscience.

Reaching for the knife wasn’t a conscious move. His fingers brushed the worn out handle.

There was a choice to make here, Chaff was right.

He could drown in his grief and let himself get killed or he could try to survive. Survive another day. Stay alive. See what the next dawn would bring.

Fight. Survive. Find a way.

His own words echoed in his head, making it difficult to think. He was too much of a survivor, had always been too much of a survivor. If Effie didn’t know when to quit, he didn’t know when to give up.

He could imagine her now, standing up behind the couch in the penthouse, too nervous to sit down, staring at the screen, biting down on a cigarette that she would have forgotten to light, holding her breath, waiting for his next move… Hoping he would get what she wanted.

Fight. Survive. Find a way. Win. Come back to me.

Reaching for the knife… Was it betraying Katniss?

Or was it giving up that would have been betraying the girl?

He knew what she would have said. That was the worst thing. They were too much alike, too desperate for another breath even at the worst times… Too much of survivors to lie down and die…

His fingers closed on the handle. It was an immediate comfort. It fitted perfectly in his palm as if it had been made for him, an extension of his arm. It had been so long, it might as well have been.

Slowly, testing out his injuries, he got to his feet and followed after Chaff. It was a short tunnel to the surface. Eleven’s victor was leaning against the entrance of the cave, his arms crossed in front of his chest. His dark eyes immediately darted to the knife gripped tight in his fist and his posture noticeably relaxed.

The sun was setting outside. He must have been out cold longer than he had thought. The surrounding woods told him they were in Twelve. Maybe they should have headed there first, like Katniss had wanted. Maybe then…

“What did I miss?” he forced himself to ask, to focus.

“A cannon this morning.” Chaff told him. “Quiet since.”

They waited for Panem’s anthem. The first face to appear was Elis Green’s from Six. She had held out longer than he had thought.

They didn’t stay to watch the rest. He didn’t want to see Johanna’s or Katniss’ picture flash up in the sky.

They made their way back to Chaff’s cave in silence. It left them with Cashmere, Enobaria, Beetee and Grant from Nine. And the two of them, of course.

“Thought you didn’t want allies.” he mumbled after they had sat back next to the fire. He accepted the fruits Chaff handed him, wincing when his bruised side protested the sudden move.

“Changed my mind.” Chaff claimed and left it at that.

Haymitch nodded and didn’t push.

He didn’t need to know what had changed.

It was obvious what had changed.

Katniss was gone.

[networkingdefinition]

Alligators Quotes

Official Website: Alligators Quotes

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• A gun is not a weapon! It’s a tool, like a butcher’s knife, or a harpoon, or an alligator. – Homer • All the pictures on the walls, they all white as lilies and smiling like alligators. – Charlaine Harris • Alligator: The crocodile of America, superior in every detail to the crocodile of the effete monarchies of the Old World. – Ambrose Bierce • Alligators and crocodiles are some of the most aggressive creatures on the planet – they’ll take down a boat if you come up to their nest. – Jack Hanna • Au revoir, jewelled alligators and white hotels, hallucinatory forests, farewell. – J. G. Ballard

jQuery(document).ready(function($) var data = action: 'polyxgo_products_search', type: 'Product', keywords: 'Alligator', orderby: 'rand', order: 'DESC', template: '1', limit: '68', columns: '4', viewall:'Shop All', ; jQuery.post(spyr_params.ajaxurl,data, function(response) var obj = jQuery.parseJSON(response); jQuery('#thelovesof_alligator').html(obj); jQuery('#thelovesof_alligator img.swiper-lazy:not(.swiper-lazy-loaded)' ).each(function () var img = jQuery(this); img.attr("src",img.data('src')); img.addClass( 'swiper-lazy-loaded' ); img.removeAttr('data-src'); ); ); ); • Besides alligators, the only animals to be feared are the poisonous serpents. These are certainly common enough in the forest, but no fatal accident happened during the whole time of my residence. – Henry Walter Bates • Donald Trump is my leader. And if he decides to drop the swamp and the alligator, I will drop the swamp and the alligator. – Newt Gingrich • Don’t taunt the alligator until after you’ve crossed the creek. – Dan Rather • Down in Louisiana where the alligators grow so mean, there lived a girl that I swear to the world made the alligators look tame. – Tony Joe White • Everything on Saturday morning [cartoons] moves alike that’s one of the reasons it’s not animation. The drawings are different, but everybody acts the same way, their feet move the same way, and everybody runs the same way. It doesn’t matter whether it’s an alligator or a man or a baby or anything, they all move the same. – Chuck Jones • Far off in the red mangroves an alligator has heaved himself onto a hummock of grass and lies there, studying his poems. – Mary Oliver • Feed the alligators and you get bigger alligators. – Helen Gurley Brown • First time I saw an alligator gar I damn near threw up. They ain’t natural anything get that big. It’s ten feet long and three feet at the girth. Not one of God’s creations like you and meSome say they ain’t afraid of alligator gar fish. Bullshit. You look at that thing. It’s big and mean. Swallow both of us. Them people say they ain’t afraid tellin’ lies. – Bukka White • I dislike the word ’emerging artist.’ Emerging connotes to me an alligator coming up from the water. I consider all artists to be artists, not rising, emerging, amateur, beginning, but the real thing. – Jack White • I look in music magazines now and see things on Luther Allison, and my name’s getting out there more, thanks to all the good people at Alligator Records and at my management company. – Luther Allison • I love The Inn at Palmetto Bluff, an Auberge Property in Bluffton, South Carolina. Its a spectacular corner of the world, with massive old trees lined with Spanish moss, and alligators swimming in the river. – Gail Simmons • I spent most of my 20s with these alligator wrestlers in the swamps of South Florida. – Karen Russell • I’m also fascinated by the difference between terror and fear. Fear says, “Do not actually put your hand in the alligator,” while terror says, “Avoid Florida entirely because alligators exist. – Mira Grant • I’ve tried that. I’ve tried aspirin, too. Rusty thinks I should smoke marijuana, and I did for a while, but it only makes me giggle. What I’ve found does the most good is just to get into a taxi and go to Tiffany’s. It calms me down right away, the quietness and the proud look of it; nothing very bad could happen to you there, not with those kind men in their nice suits, and that lovely smell of silver and alligator wallets. If I could find a real-life place that made me feel like Tiffany’s, then I’d buy some furniture and give the cat a name. – Truman Capote • I’ve wrestled with alligators, I’ve tussled with a whale. I done handcuffed lightning And throw thunder in jail. You know I’m bad. just last week, I murdered a rock, Injured a stone, Hospitalized a brick. I’m so mean, I make medicine sick. – Muhammad Ali • If all I can say is I’m not in this swamp, I’m not in this swamp then there is not a rope in front of me and there is not an alligator behind me and there is not a girl sitting at the edge eating a hot dog and if I believe that, then dying would be the only answer because then Death couldn’t come and say Peachy to me anymore and after all she has a brother who believes in hope. – Tori Amos • If an optimist had his left arm chewed off by an alligator, he might say in a pleasant and hopeful voice, “Well this isn’t too bad, I don’t have a left arm anymore but at least nobody will ever ask me if I’m left-handed or right-handed,” but most of us would say something more along the lines of, “Aaaaaa! My arm! My arm!” – Daniel Handler • If five years from now we solve the access problem, but what we’re hearing is all encrypted, I’ll probably, if I’m still here, be talking about that in a very different way: the objective is the same. The objective is for us to get those conversations whether they’re by an alligator clip or ones and zeros. Whoever they are, whatever they are, I need them. – Louis J. Freeh • If I could rest anywhere, it would be in Arkansas, where the men are of the real half-horse, half-alligator breed such as grows nowhere else on the face of the universal earth. – Davy Crockett • IGNORANCE I didn’t know love would make me this crazy, with my eyes like the river Ceyhun carrying me in its rapids out to sea,where every bit of shattered boat sinks to the bottom. An alligator lifts its head and swallows the ocean, then the ocean floor becomes a desert covering the alligator in sand drifts. Changes do happen. I do not know how, or what remains of what has disappeared into the absolute. I hear so many stories and explanations, but I keep quiet, because I don’t know anything, and because something I swallowed in the ocean has made me completely content with ignorance. – Rumi • Im Southern, so alligator tail is pretty interesting and yummy. – LeAnn Rimes • I’m that same David Crockett, fresh from the backwoods, half-horse, half-alligator, a little touched with the snapping turtle; can wade the Mississippi, leap the Ohio, ride upon a streak of lightning, and slip without a scratch down a honey locust [tree]. – Davy Crockett • It embarrasses me to think of all those years I was buying silk suits and alligator shoes that were hurting my feet; cars that I just parked, and the dust would just build up on them. – George Foreman • It makes my skin crawl to think about the violent ways snakes, lizards, alligators and other exotic creatures are raised and killed for boots, bags and belts. – Kelly Brook • It took me the bulk of my twenties to write one book about a family of alligator wrestlers. Whereas somebody like Steve Martin is releasing his latest banjo symphony, having just completed another movie and acclaimed, best-selling novel. – Karen Russell • It’s so hard for me to sit back here in this studio, looking at a guy out here, hollering my name!—When last year I spent more money, on spilled liquor, in bars from one side of this world to the other, than you made! You’re talking to the Rolex wearing, diamond ring wearing, kiss stealing, whoa! wheelin dealin’, limosuine riding, jet flying son of a gun and I’m having a hard time holding these alligators down! – Ric Flair • It’s hard, when you’re up to your armpits in alligators, to remember you came here to drain the swamp. – Ronald Reagan • It’s the chauffeur’s outfit from hell, right down to the alligator shoes. I was wearing these alligator shoes and this very interesting and haunting chauffeur’s outfit, but what really did it for me was the hat. And then, when I eventually get my eye taken out, the gold eye really brought it home for me. – Dennis Haysbert • It’s what you’d expect out of Baton Rouge: people tailgating with shrimp étouffée, everything from alligators roasting on a barbecue to dishes that you would get in the French Quarter. These people are serious and they are legit and they’re ready to go. – Erin Andrews • I’ve just done a movie – Albino Alligator – with Viggo Mortensen, who’s an actor I idolize. He influenced me in a way that has helped me move toward getting lead parts instead of supporting parts, merely through his presence. So now I tell everyone, as a joke, that I’m entering my Viggo Mortensen phase. – Skeet Ulrich • Just take them rascals [rapists, killers, child abusers] out in the swamp / Put ’em on their knees and tie ’em to a stump / Let the rattlers and the bugs and the alligators do the rest. – Charlie Daniels • Maybe humans are just the pet alligators that God flushed down the toilet. – Chuck Palahniuk • My father being an outdoors person, he used to take us on quite a few adventures thorugh the wild areas down there, introducing us to alligators and rattlesnakes and all the trees and plants. – Jim Fowler • My mom was beautiful; she was supposed to be the original Jane in the original Tarzan movie. They asked her to put her foot in the water and there was an alligator in there, and she wouldn’t put her foot in the water. – Dr. John • My number one rule is to keep that camera rolling. Even if it’s shaky or slightly out of focus, I don’t give a rip. Even if a big old alligator is chewing me up I want to go down and go, ‘Crikey!’ just before I die. That would be the ultimate for me. – Steve Irwin • Nobody in the city of Los Angeles knows how to catch an alligator, … We have no experience in recreation and parks, the zoo or animal control. – Janice Hahn • Not much is known about alligators. They don’t train well. And they’re unwieldy and rowdy to work with in laboratories. – Diane Ackerman • On one hole, I hit an alligator so hard, he’s now my golf bag. – Bob Hope • Once when I was golfing in Georgia, I hooked the ball into the swamp. I went in after it and found an alligator wearing a shirt with a picture of a little golfer on it. – Buddy Hackett • People wrestle alligators but not once has someone done it without an audience. – Doug Stanhope • Places like Hilton Head, with water adjacency and nice climates, are in high demand, and land values are insane. In the case of Hilton Head, which was developed in 1970 on what had been a mosquito- and alligator-infested swampy barrier island, land value has leaped from nearly zero to now unaffordable. – Susan Orlean • Really, it was difficult to determine which I had most reason to fear—dogs, alligators or men! – Solomon Northup • Remember that postcard Grandpa sent us from Florida of that Alligator biting that woman’s bottom? That’s right, we all thought it was hilarious. But, it turns out we were wrong. That alligator was sexually harassing that woman. – Homer • Remodeling defies the principles of modern commerce. You shell out great sums of money to people over whom you have no authority or power, yet these same people are constantly insinuating that you’re cheap. (It reminded me of medicine, another area where you shell out great sums of money to people over whom you have no authority or power, who make you feel guilty for questioning a bill.) Construction workers are the blue-collar version of the snooty salespeople at Gucci who make $8 an hour but look down on you if you balk at a $400 alligator wallet. – Margo Kaufman • Sanford is a little redneck town north of Orlando. It’s right off Lake Jessup.Lake Jessup is the most alligator infested lake in the United States and I live literally 5/10ths of a mile north of that lake right off the swamp down here. I’ve lived here since ’94. When I left Nebraska my dad got a job at a private Christian school in West Palm Beach. People will say “You’re not really a country boy. You’re from Palm Beach, Florida.” Well, I moved to West Palm Beach, FL which is a far cry from Palm Beach, FL. There’s a reason it’s called West Palm Beach. – Larry the Cable Guy • See you later, alligator. After a while, crocodile. – Bill Haley • She gazed toward the marsh that grew thicker, deeper, greener with approaching summer. Mosquitoes whined in there, breeding in the dark water. Alligators slid through it, silent death. It was a place where snakes could slither and bogs could suck the shoe right off your foot. And it was a place, she thought, that went bright and beautiful with the twinkling of fireflies, where wildflowers thrived in the shade and the stingy light. Where an eagle could soar like a king. There was no beauty without risk. No life without it. – Nora Roberts • Skins tanned to the consistency of well-traveled alligator suitcases. – Russell Baker • So he left the lagoon and entered the jungle again, within a few days was completely lost, following the lagoons southward through the increasing rain and heat, attacked by alligators and giant bats, a second Adam searching for the forgotten paradises of the reborn Sun. – J. G. Ballard • That dreadful alligator attack in Orlando would never have happened if Disney had put up real warning signs, like other Florida resorts do. But wild alligators don’t fit the Disney image, so they were no proper warnings, and a child died for no reason. – Carl Hiaasen • The government competes in the private sector the way an alligator competes with a duck. – Mike Pence • The Marquis sighed. “I thought it was just a legend,” he said. “Like the alligators in the sewers of New York City.” Old Bailey nodded, sagely: “What, the big white buggers? They’re down there. I had a friend lost a head to one of them.” A moment of silence. Old Naeiley handed the statue back to the Marquis. Then he raised his hand, and snapped it, like a crocodile hand, at the Carabas. “It was OK,” gurned Old Bailey with a grin that was most terrible to behold. “He had another. – Neil Gaiman • The sensation of writing a book is the sensation of spinning, blinded by love and daring. It is the sensation of a stunt pilot’s turning barrel rolls, or an inchworm’s blind rearing from a stem in search of a route. At its worst, it feels like alligator wrestling, at the level of the sentence. – Annie Dillard • There’s a lot of time sitting in movies, so you can put alligators in people’s trailers in your spare time. So it [making a film] moves slower, which in some ways is great, because you can live with a scene and invest in it a lot. And in some ways it’s hard, because sometimes you can start to lose your energy a little bit, but both are fun. – Mary-Louise Parker • They will do more whether we do what we’re doing or whether we don’t do what we’re doing. And the idea that you could appease them [terrorists] by stopping doing what we’re doing or some implication that by doing what we’re doing we’re inciting them to attack us is just utter nonsense. It’s just – it’s kind of like feeding an alligator, hoping it eats you last. – Donald Rumsfeld • Three million alligators were killed in Florida between 1880 and 1900. Goody! – Will Cuppy • Turn the goddam music up! My heart feels like an alligator! – Hunter S. Thompson • Unoka went into an inner room and soon returned with a small wooden disc containing a kola nut, some alligator pepper and a lump of white chalk. “I have kola,” he announced when he sat down, and passed the disc over to his guest. “Thank you. He who brings kola brings life. But I think you ought to break it,” replied Okoye passing back the disc. “No, it is for you, I think,” and they argued like this for a few moments before Unoka accepted the honor of breaking the kola. Okoye, meanwhile, took the lump of chalk, drew some lines on the floor, and then painted his big toe. – Chinua Achebe • Well, Im wrestling alligators. – Claire McCaskill • What is a turducken? An exclusive culinary creation available by special order from some little Cajun town down south. Entirely deboned, a turducken consists of a turkey, stuffed with duck, stuffed with a chicken, like an edible Russian nesting doll. Some were stuffed with alligator, crap, shrimp; my favorite was the traditional cornbread variety. – S.A. Bodeen • When Amos Moses was a boy his daddy would use him for alligator bait, tie a rope around his neck and throw him in the swamp. – Jerry Reed • When I was a little kid, I was the first kid in my neighborhood to have a pet alligator. – Benicio Del Toro • When I was young, I had a big problem with warts. It started with one on the side of my little finger. A year later, I had it on all my fingers. My hands looked like the hands of an alligator. So I fist bumped people instead of shaking hands for a few years. – Berhan Ahmed • When we were shooting in Shreveport, me and a couple of friends went down to Lafayette, because they had a big Zydeco music festival down there. We spent two days dancing to Zydeco music, eating fried alligator… It was one of the craziest festivals I’ve ever been to in my life, but I loved it. – Alexander Skarsgard • Writing fantasy lets me imagine a great deal more than, say, writing about alligators, and lets me write about places more distant than Florida, but I can tell you things about Florida and alligators, let you make the connection all on your own. – Terry Brooks • Writing is the hardest way of earning a living, with the possible exception of wrestling alligators. – Richard Miller • You know you’re old when someone compliments you on your alligator shoes, and you’re barefoot. – Phyllis Diller • You’ve got forever; and somehow you can’t do much with it. You’ve got forever; and it’s a mile wide and an inch deep and full of alligators. – Jim Thompson

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Alligators Quotes

Official Website: Alligators Quotes

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• A gun is not a weapon! It’s a tool, like a butcher’s knife, or a harpoon, or an alligator. – Homer • All the pictures on the walls, they all white as lilies and smiling like alligators. – Charlaine Harris • Alligator: The crocodile of America, superior in every detail to the crocodile of the effete monarchies of the Old World. – Ambrose Bierce • Alligators and crocodiles are some of the most aggressive creatures on the planet – they’ll take down a boat if you come up to their nest. – Jack Hanna • Au revoir, jewelled alligators and white hotels, hallucinatory forests, farewell. – J. G. Ballard

jQuery(document).ready(function($) var data = action: 'polyxgo_products_search', type: 'Product', keywords: 'Alligator', orderby: 'rand', order: 'DESC', template: '1', limit: '68', columns: '4', viewall:'Shop All', ; jQuery.post(spyr_params.ajaxurl,data, function(response) var obj = jQuery.parseJSON(response); jQuery('#thelovesof_alligator').html(obj); jQuery('#thelovesof_alligator img.swiper-lazy:not(.swiper-lazy-loaded)' ).each(function () var img = jQuery(this); img.attr("src",img.data('src')); img.addClass( 'swiper-lazy-loaded' ); img.removeAttr('data-src'); ); ); ); • Besides alligators, the only animals to be feared are the poisonous serpents. These are certainly common enough in the forest, but no fatal accident happened during the whole time of my residence. – Henry Walter Bates • Donald Trump is my leader. And if he decides to drop the swamp and the alligator, I will drop the swamp and the alligator. – Newt Gingrich • Don’t taunt the alligator until after you’ve crossed the creek. – Dan Rather • Down in Louisiana where the alligators grow so mean, there lived a girl that I swear to the world made the alligators look tame. – Tony Joe White • Everything on Saturday morning [cartoons] moves alike that’s one of the reasons it’s not animation. The drawings are different, but everybody acts the same way, their feet move the same way, and everybody runs the same way. It doesn’t matter whether it’s an alligator or a man or a baby or anything, they all move the same. – Chuck Jones • Far off in the red mangroves an alligator has heaved himself onto a hummock of grass and lies there, studying his poems. – Mary Oliver • Feed the alligators and you get bigger alligators. – Helen Gurley Brown • First time I saw an alligator gar I damn near threw up. They ain’t natural anything get that big. It’s ten feet long and three feet at the girth. Not one of God’s creations like you and meSome say they ain’t afraid of alligator gar fish. Bullshit. You look at that thing. It’s big and mean. Swallow both of us. Them people say they ain’t afraid tellin’ lies. – Bukka White • I dislike the word ’emerging artist.’ Emerging connotes to me an alligator coming up from the water. I consider all artists to be artists, not rising, emerging, amateur, beginning, but the real thing. – Jack White • I look in music magazines now and see things on Luther Allison, and my name’s getting out there more, thanks to all the good people at Alligator Records and at my management company. – Luther Allison • I love The Inn at Palmetto Bluff, an Auberge Property in Bluffton, South Carolina. Its a spectacular corner of the world, with massive old trees lined with Spanish moss, and alligators swimming in the river. – Gail Simmons • I spent most of my 20s with these alligator wrestlers in the swamps of South Florida. – Karen Russell • I’m also fascinated by the difference between terror and fear. Fear says, “Do not actually put your hand in the alligator,” while terror says, “Avoid Florida entirely because alligators exist. – Mira Grant • I’ve tried that. I’ve tried aspirin, too. Rusty thinks I should smoke marijuana, and I did for a while, but it only makes me giggle. What I’ve found does the most good is just to get into a taxi and go to Tiffany’s. It calms me down right away, the quietness and the proud look of it; nothing very bad could happen to you there, not with those kind men in their nice suits, and that lovely smell of silver and alligator wallets. If I could find a real-life place that made me feel like Tiffany’s, then I’d buy some furniture and give the cat a name. – Truman Capote • I’ve wrestled with alligators, I’ve tussled with a whale. I done handcuffed lightning And throw thunder in jail. You know I’m bad. just last week, I murdered a rock, Injured a stone, Hospitalized a brick. I’m so mean, I make medicine sick. – Muhammad Ali • If all I can say is I’m not in this swamp, I’m not in this swamp then there is not a rope in front of me and there is not an alligator behind me and there is not a girl sitting at the edge eating a hot dog and if I believe that, then dying would be the only answer because then Death couldn’t come and say Peachy to me anymore and after all she has a brother who believes in hope. – Tori Amos • If an optimist had his left arm chewed off by an alligator, he might say in a pleasant and hopeful voice, “Well this isn’t too bad, I don’t have a left arm anymore but at least nobody will ever ask me if I’m left-handed or right-handed,” but most of us would say something more along the lines of, “Aaaaaa! My arm! My arm!” – Daniel Handler • If five years from now we solve the access problem, but what we’re hearing is all encrypted, I’ll probably, if I’m still here, be talking about that in a very different way: the objective is the same. The objective is for us to get those conversations whether they’re by an alligator clip or ones and zeros. Whoever they are, whatever they are, I need them. – Louis J. Freeh • If I could rest anywhere, it would be in Arkansas, where the men are of the real half-horse, half-alligator breed such as grows nowhere else on the face of the universal earth. – Davy Crockett • IGNORANCE I didn’t know love would make me this crazy, with my eyes like the river Ceyhun carrying me in its rapids out to sea,where every bit of shattered boat sinks to the bottom. An alligator lifts its head and swallows the ocean, then the ocean floor becomes a desert covering the alligator in sand drifts. Changes do happen. I do not know how, or what remains of what has disappeared into the absolute. I hear so many stories and explanations, but I keep quiet, because I don’t know anything, and because something I swallowed in the ocean has made me completely content with ignorance. – Rumi • Im Southern, so alligator tail is pretty interesting and yummy. – LeAnn Rimes • I’m that same David Crockett, fresh from the backwoods, half-horse, half-alligator, a little touched with the snapping turtle; can wade the Mississippi, leap the Ohio, ride upon a streak of lightning, and slip without a scratch down a honey locust [tree]. – Davy Crockett • It embarrasses me to think of all those years I was buying silk suits and alligator shoes that were hurting my feet; cars that I just parked, and the dust would just build up on them. – George Foreman • It makes my skin crawl to think about the violent ways snakes, lizards, alligators and other exotic creatures are raised and killed for boots, bags and belts. – Kelly Brook • It took me the bulk of my twenties to write one book about a family of alligator wrestlers. Whereas somebody like Steve Martin is releasing his latest banjo symphony, having just completed another movie and acclaimed, best-selling novel. – Karen Russell • It’s so hard for me to sit back here in this studio, looking at a guy out here, hollering my name!—When last year I spent more money, on spilled liquor, in bars from one side of this world to the other, than you made! You’re talking to the Rolex wearing, diamond ring wearing, kiss stealing, whoa! wheelin dealin’, limosuine riding, jet flying son of a gun and I’m having a hard time holding these alligators down! – Ric Flair • It’s hard, when you’re up to your armpits in alligators, to remember you came here to drain the swamp. – Ronald Reagan • It’s the chauffeur’s outfit from hell, right down to the alligator shoes. I was wearing these alligator shoes and this very interesting and haunting chauffeur’s outfit, but what really did it for me was the hat. And then, when I eventually get my eye taken out, the gold eye really brought it home for me. – Dennis Haysbert • It’s what you’d expect out of Baton Rouge: people tailgating with shrimp étouffée, everything from alligators roasting on a barbecue to dishes that you would get in the French Quarter. These people are serious and they are legit and they’re ready to go. – Erin Andrews • I’ve just done a movie – Albino Alligator – with Viggo Mortensen, who’s an actor I idolize. He influenced me in a way that has helped me move toward getting lead parts instead of supporting parts, merely through his presence. So now I tell everyone, as a joke, that I’m entering my Viggo Mortensen phase. – Skeet Ulrich • Just take them rascals [rapists, killers, child abusers] out in the swamp / Put ’em on their knees and tie ’em to a stump / Let the rattlers and the bugs and the alligators do the rest. – Charlie Daniels • Maybe humans are just the pet alligators that God flushed down the toilet. – Chuck Palahniuk • My father being an outdoors person, he used to take us on quite a few adventures thorugh the wild areas down there, introducing us to alligators and rattlesnakes and all the trees and plants. – Jim Fowler • My mom was beautiful; she was supposed to be the original Jane in the original Tarzan movie. They asked her to put her foot in the water and there was an alligator in there, and she wouldn’t put her foot in the water. – Dr. John • My number one rule is to keep that camera rolling. Even if it’s shaky or slightly out of focus, I don’t give a rip. Even if a big old alligator is chewing me up I want to go down and go, ‘Crikey!’ just before I die. That would be the ultimate for me. – Steve Irwin • Nobody in the city of Los Angeles knows how to catch an alligator, … We have no experience in recreation and parks, the zoo or animal control. – Janice Hahn • Not much is known about alligators. They don’t train well. And they’re unwieldy and rowdy to work with in laboratories. – Diane Ackerman • On one hole, I hit an alligator so hard, he’s now my golf bag. – Bob Hope • Once when I was golfing in Georgia, I hooked the ball into the swamp. I went in after it and found an alligator wearing a shirt with a picture of a little golfer on it. – Buddy Hackett • People wrestle alligators but not once has someone done it without an audience. – Doug Stanhope • Places like Hilton Head, with water adjacency and nice climates, are in high demand, and land values are insane. In the case of Hilton Head, which was developed in 1970 on what had been a mosquito- and alligator-infested swampy barrier island, land value has leaped from nearly zero to now unaffordable. – Susan Orlean • Really, it was difficult to determine which I had most reason to fear—dogs, alligators or men! – Solomon Northup • Remember that postcard Grandpa sent us from Florida of that Alligator biting that woman’s bottom? That’s right, we all thought it was hilarious. But, it turns out we were wrong. That alligator was sexually harassing that woman. – Homer • Remodeling defies the principles of modern commerce. You shell out great sums of money to people over whom you have no authority or power, yet these same people are constantly insinuating that you’re cheap. (It reminded me of medicine, another area where you shell out great sums of money to people over whom you have no authority or power, who make you feel guilty for questioning a bill.) Construction workers are the blue-collar version of the snooty salespeople at Gucci who make $8 an hour but look down on you if you balk at a $400 alligator wallet. – Margo Kaufman • Sanford is a little redneck town north of Orlando. It’s right off Lake Jessup.Lake Jessup is the most alligator infested lake in the United States and I live literally 5/10ths of a mile north of that lake right off the swamp down here. I’ve lived here since ’94. When I left Nebraska my dad got a job at a private Christian school in West Palm Beach. People will say “You’re not really a country boy. You’re from Palm Beach, Florida.” Well, I moved to West Palm Beach, FL which is a far cry from Palm Beach, FL. There’s a reason it’s called West Palm Beach. – Larry the Cable Guy • See you later, alligator. After a while, crocodile. – Bill Haley • She gazed toward the marsh that grew thicker, deeper, greener with approaching summer. Mosquitoes whined in there, breeding in the dark water. Alligators slid through it, silent death. It was a place where snakes could slither and bogs could suck the shoe right off your foot. And it was a place, she thought, that went bright and beautiful with the twinkling of fireflies, where wildflowers thrived in the shade and the stingy light. Where an eagle could soar like a king. There was no beauty without risk. No life without it. – Nora Roberts • Skins tanned to the consistency of well-traveled alligator suitcases. – Russell Baker • So he left the lagoon and entered the jungle again, within a few days was completely lost, following the lagoons southward through the increasing rain and heat, attacked by alligators and giant bats, a second Adam searching for the forgotten paradises of the reborn Sun. – J. G. Ballard • That dreadful alligator attack in Orlando would never have happened if Disney had put up real warning signs, like other Florida resorts do. But wild alligators don’t fit the Disney image, so they were no proper warnings, and a child died for no reason. – Carl Hiaasen • The government competes in the private sector the way an alligator competes with a duck. – Mike Pence • The Marquis sighed. “I thought it was just a legend,” he said. “Like the alligators in the sewers of New York City.” Old Bailey nodded, sagely: “What, the big white buggers? They’re down there. I had a friend lost a head to one of them.” A moment of silence. Old Naeiley handed the statue back to the Marquis. Then he raised his hand, and snapped it, like a crocodile hand, at the Carabas. “It was OK,” gurned Old Bailey with a grin that was most terrible to behold. “He had another. – Neil Gaiman • The sensation of writing a book is the sensation of spinning, blinded by love and daring. It is the sensation of a stunt pilot’s turning barrel rolls, or an inchworm’s blind rearing from a stem in search of a route. At its worst, it feels like alligator wrestling, at the level of the sentence. – Annie Dillard • There’s a lot of time sitting in movies, so you can put alligators in people’s trailers in your spare time. So it [making a film] moves slower, which in some ways is great, because you can live with a scene and invest in it a lot. And in some ways it’s hard, because sometimes you can start to lose your energy a little bit, but both are fun. – Mary-Louise Parker • They will do more whether we do what we’re doing or whether we don’t do what we’re doing. And the idea that you could appease them [terrorists] by stopping doing what we’re doing or some implication that by doing what we’re doing we’re inciting them to attack us is just utter nonsense. It’s just – it’s kind of like feeding an alligator, hoping it eats you last. – Donald Rumsfeld • Three million alligators were killed in Florida between 1880 and 1900. Goody! – Will Cuppy • Turn the goddam music up! My heart feels like an alligator! – Hunter S. Thompson • Unoka went into an inner room and soon returned with a small wooden disc containing a kola nut, some alligator pepper and a lump of white chalk. “I have kola,” he announced when he sat down, and passed the disc over to his guest. “Thank you. He who brings kola brings life. But I think you ought to break it,” replied Okoye passing back the disc. “No, it is for you, I think,” and they argued like this for a few moments before Unoka accepted the honor of breaking the kola. Okoye, meanwhile, took the lump of chalk, drew some lines on the floor, and then painted his big toe. – Chinua Achebe • Well, Im wrestling alligators. – Claire McCaskill • What is a turducken? An exclusive culinary creation available by special order from some little Cajun town down south. Entirely deboned, a turducken consists of a turkey, stuffed with duck, stuffed with a chicken, like an edible Russian nesting doll. Some were stuffed with alligator, crap, shrimp; my favorite was the traditional cornbread variety. – S.A. Bodeen • When Amos Moses was a boy his daddy would use him for alligator bait, tie a rope around his neck and throw him in the swamp. – Jerry Reed • When I was a little kid, I was the first kid in my neighborhood to have a pet alligator. – Benicio Del Toro • When I was young, I had a big problem with warts. It started with one on the side of my little finger. A year later, I had it on all my fingers. My hands looked like the hands of an alligator. So I fist bumped people instead of shaking hands for a few years. – Berhan Ahmed • When we were shooting in Shreveport, me and a couple of friends went down to Lafayette, because they had a big Zydeco music festival down there. We spent two days dancing to Zydeco music, eating fried alligator… It was one of the craziest festivals I’ve ever been to in my life, but I loved it. – Alexander Skarsgard • Writing fantasy lets me imagine a great deal more than, say, writing about alligators, and lets me write about places more distant than Florida, but I can tell you things about Florida and alligators, let you make the connection all on your own. – Terry Brooks • Writing is the hardest way of earning a living, with the possible exception of wrestling alligators. – Richard Miller • You know you’re old when someone compliments you on your alligator shoes, and you’re barefoot. – Phyllis Diller • You’ve got forever; and somehow you can’t do much with it. You’ve got forever; and it’s a mile wide and an inch deep and full of alligators. – Jim Thompson

[clickbank-storefront-bestselling]

jQuery(document).ready(function($) var data = action: 'polyxgo_products_search', type: 'Product', keywords: 'a', orderby: 'rand', order: 'DESC', template: '1', limit: '4', columns: '4', viewall:'Shop All', ; jQuery.post(spyr_params.ajaxurl,data, function(response) var obj = jQuery.parseJSON(response); jQuery('#thelovesof_a').html(obj); jQuery('#thelovesof_a img.swiper-lazy:not(.swiper-lazy-loaded)' ).each(function () var img = jQuery(this); img.attr("src",img.data('src')); img.addClass( 'swiper-lazy-loaded' ); img.removeAttr('data-src'); ); ); );

jQuery(document).ready(function($) var data = action: 'polyxgo_products_search', type: 'Product', keywords: 'e', orderby: 'rand', order: 'DESC', template: '1', limit: '4', columns: '4', viewall:'Shop All', ; jQuery.post(spyr_params.ajaxurl,data, function(response) var obj = jQuery.parseJSON(response); jQuery('#thelovesof_e').html(obj); jQuery('#thelovesof_e img.swiper-lazy:not(.swiper-lazy-loaded)' ).each(function () var img = jQuery(this); img.attr("src",img.data('src')); img.addClass( 'swiper-lazy-loaded' ); img.removeAttr('data-src'); ); ); );

jQuery(document).ready(function($) var data = action: 'polyxgo_products_search', type: 'Product', keywords: 'i', orderby: 'rand', order: 'DESC', template: '1', limit: '4', columns: '4', viewall:'Shop All', ; jQuery.post(spyr_params.ajaxurl,data, function(response) var obj = jQuery.parseJSON(response); jQuery('#thelovesof_i').html(obj); jQuery('#thelovesof_i img.swiper-lazy:not(.swiper-lazy-loaded)' ).each(function () var img = jQuery(this); img.attr("src",img.data('src')); img.addClass( 'swiper-lazy-loaded' ); img.removeAttr('data-src'); ); ); );

jQuery(document).ready(function($) var data = action: 'polyxgo_products_search', type: 'Product', keywords: 'o', orderby: 'rand', order: 'DESC', template: '1', limit: '4', columns: '4', viewall:'Shop All', ; jQuery.post(spyr_params.ajaxurl,data, function(response) var obj = jQuery.parseJSON(response); jQuery('#thelovesof_o').html(obj); jQuery('#thelovesof_o img.swiper-lazy:not(.swiper-lazy-loaded)' ).each(function () var img = jQuery(this); img.attr("src",img.data('src')); img.addClass( 'swiper-lazy-loaded' ); img.removeAttr('data-src'); ); ); );

jQuery(document).ready(function($) var data = action: 'polyxgo_products_search', type: 'Product', keywords: 'u', orderby: 'rand', order: 'DESC', template: '1', limit: '4', columns: '4', viewall:'Shop All', ; jQuery.post(spyr_params.ajaxurl,data, function(response) var obj = jQuery.parseJSON(response); jQuery('#thelovesof_u').html(obj); jQuery('#thelovesof_u img.swiper-lazy:not(.swiper-lazy-loaded)' ).each(function () var img = jQuery(this); img.attr("src",img.data('src')); img.addClass( 'swiper-lazy-loaded' ); img.removeAttr('data-src'); ); ); );

[friends-call-me-wobbly-hands]

Eleven Days

AO3 link: http://archiveofourown.org/works/10812825

Undertale (Underfell) fanfiction

Warnings: swearing, minor character death, violence, child abuse mention

Day 1

…On the first day, everything rockets down.

Papyrus doesn’t understand at once. How can he? The morning starts just normal. He wakes up at 5:25 and marches down the stairs in the silence of a still-sleeping neighborhood. He attaches the pieces of red and black armor where they belong. After every grim plate and every dangerous spike is placed properly, Papyrus looks at the clock. It is 5:35. High time his subordinate woke up too.

Papyrus opens his jaws like an attacking shark.

“SANS, GET UP THIS INSTANT OR SOMEONE’S IN THIS HOUSE IS GOING TO GET DUSTED, AND I HIGHLY DOUBT THAT IT’D BE ME!!!”

He listens to the fading echo of his voice. Houses all around blossom with lights and noises: the call served as an alarm clock for everyone on the street again.

Papyrus grins.

He turns the lights on too and fumbles with a packet of takeaways from Grillby’s. Not that he likes the taste, but it’s Wednesday, and every Wednesday before he does the shopping the house is about as rich in food as a church mouse’s fridge, so that is the only edible - or almost so - thing left for breakfast. And Sans will be quite angry to see his greasy cache robbed. Which is fun. Maybe he will even go as far as changing his expression for once. Just to think of it, all those grimaces he will make while watching his fries disappear in front of him...

Speaking of Sans.

“SANS, I ABSOLUTELY REQUIRE YOU TO APPEAR DOWNSTAIRS TEN SECONDS AFTER A COMMAND, AND YOU HAVE ALREADY EXCEEDED THIS LIMIT BY A WHOLE MINUTE! I DO NOT CARE WHAT KEEPS YOU THAT PREOCCUPIED THERE, BUT IT IS IN YOUR INTEREST TO COME OUT RIGHT AWAY! DON’T MAKE ME PULL YOU ALL THE WAY TO YOUR STATION BY THE SCRUFF OF YOUR NECK AGAIN!”

The guard sighs, rubbing his throat. Any other day Sans would stumble out of his door immediately, huffing from the shock of a sudden awakening. But today… Is it possible that he is still sleeping? Not really. The smaller skeleton is quite a light-sleeper, stirred up by a slightest sound or movement. And even if he wasn’t, well. Such screams would awaken the dead with ease.

“I SWEAR, SANS!!! YOU ARE TRYING MY PATIENCE! AND I WILL NEVER FORGET ANYTHING AS DARING AS THIS, I PROMISE!!!”

No answer.

Could it be sickness? But Sans would have come anyway. Sick or not, the rules are not something you can break so simply. Could it be defiance? …That is an option, but Sans should’ve learned by now that defiance is treated accordingly, especially if it is as stupid as this is.

Is it possible that Sans has already got up and went to his sentry station all by himself?.. No. Anything but that.

Three, two, one.

“SANS!!!”

Wait. Is it… may it be a setup for a joke? Is Sans waiting for Papyrus to knock at his door only to clog his sensitive earholes with bad humor? Ugh. The possibility is always high. Sans is the type of guy who jokes at the least appropriate times, in the worst way possible, just to get a couple of long faces to his pleasure. The type of guy who jokes about cripples and dead babies in the presence of cripples and dead babies. The type of guy who would probably meet the grim reaper with a pun so terrible that death will run away in disgust. Well, you get the idea. And the worst part of it is, if you are the only brother of such a punster, you don’t get much chance to escape.

Another cold fry meets its end in Papyrus’ jaw. It is soft and oversalted. He grimaces. Oh, for Asgore’s sake! He tried his best to be gentle, but it seems that most of the times violence is the best solution. Fine. He will just go and drag that lazy bag of trash out by himself. And Sans will have to make up for his behavior later on. Papyrus can’t think up anything nice right now, but – oh, he will.

He thunders up the stairs, as intimidating as he can be. He runs up to Sans’ door. He pounders on it three or four times and then, believing he has given the other’s privacy enough respect, he throws it open with a hearty kick.

“SANS!!!”

The inside of the room is wrapped in purple twilight. Streams of yellow light from the open door outline piles of papers, crumbled packages, fries stumped into the carpet - and a small dark lump of sheets on the dirty mattress. Papyrus rushes to that lump. He tears away the sheets and shakes the skeleton underneath them.

“HAVEN’T YOU HEARD ME BEFORE? OR SHOULD I MAKE MYSELF CLEARER? GET UP THIS INSTANT!”

He shakes the other’s shoulders for a moment longer before becoming aware that something is wrong.

Something is… off.

Sans’ head hangs down loose, his eyes are dark and round, and his face… well. It is quite unnatural for someone being shaken and shouted at to have such an aloof, blank – peaceful, even! - face.

Papyrus freezes, still clenching Sans’ shoulders. The taste of salt lingers in his mouth. His thoughts stop, as if facing a dead end. His instincts, however, are still working accurately: he shrugs and checks the other skeleton’s stats out of habit.

For a second, everything seems fine to him. 1 ATK, 1 DF, 1 HP, right as it should be. Papyrus has enough time to blaze with anger and give this fraud another steady shake, when it happens.

Tick.

Sans’ stats glitch and then return back to normal again.

Papyrus blinks at the oh-so-familiar numbers before him.

1 ATK. 1 DF.

0.9 HP.

 ***

 There are no healers that would enter their house willingly. Papyrus has quite a reputation, and it’s a bad idea to dare get too close to him.

To be honest, it is a bad idea just to be born in the Underground with a talent to heal. Your life is going to be tricky at the very least. Half of the underground will try to seize you and turn into a slave. Another, saner half will haggle over every piece of gold you charge for your services. You can also hire someone, who will protect you while sucking your magic dry on a daily basis – or taking half of the gold you earn. Or you can stick together with other healers and form a union - only to probably get killed in a fight over the clients and prices. (Or never ever tell anyone you know green magic, and spend your life making sure no one learns about it.) Not the brightest perspective, you know.

To be even more honest, it is a bad idea to be born in the Underground in general.

So it’s no wonder that Papyrus has literally no one to turn to. He tries to wake the skeleton up with more shaking and shouting, and even tries a little bit of that magic on him, but it does no good. Sans just refuses to react. Papyrus shakes him like a ragdoll before throwing him back on the mattress and storming out of the room in a frenzy of annoyed “nyeh”-s.

He has no idea what to do next.

Papyrus repeatedly runs in and out of the house for the next minute. He has his duties to perform, and he can spare no time for babysitting. At the same time, he can’t just leave Sans there to rot. He pays half of the taxes, after all! Yet, nothing can be done, really. There is a handful of monsters Papyrus knows, but they wouldn’t help him even if they could. Normally that wouldn’t bother him in the slightest, but now! Of all the times! Sans surely knew how to cause him trouble, yeah…

At last Papyrus decides that Sans can wait – but his duties can’t. He goes on to meet the canine unit, gives them instructions and growls at them for a better effect. When the frightened whining reaches critical levels, Papyrus throws them a couple of bones and dismisses them. He looks at their backs as they leave, nurturing a hope that this will be enough to keep them from getting into trouble.

For another hour, at least.

The guard devotes the whole day to looking for some healer that he could trust, but nothing good comes out of it at the end. Of course he knows that bunny – and a guy in Waterfall who can patch you up without asking too many questions – and probably a Vulkin or two from Hotland, yeah. But the bunny will never deal with the skeletons, even if you aim a blaster at her. The Waterfall guy is good for wounds only. And Vulkins – well. Vulkins are just dumb. In the middle of the process they can forget that they were healing you and try to drown you in lava. It’s worth the risk when you have a hundred or two of HP points, but with Sans…

By the way, speaking of Hotland.

Papyrus lingers on a thought for a minute. Then he picks up his phone and dials a number. He would prefer not to deal with that person ever again, but it seems that he has no choice.

Well. Another reason to be annoyed with Sans. It is his fault that Papyrus has to socialize when he doesn’t want to!

The guard is thinking about how he will make Sans pay when the line is picked up.

“H-hello?” A quiet voice stutters in the dynamic. “Who am I talking to? A-and, what is more important, d-do you mind reminding me why I d-don’t know your number?”

Papyrus sighs and picks on his nose bone.

“ALPHYS. WE NEED TO TALK”.

***

The Royal Scientist arrives in half an hour, incognito. She frowns at the cold of Snowdin and muffles herself in a fur coat. Her face gives away nothing but annoyance. If she had a choice, she would laugh at the thought of travelling half of the Underground for a reason no one bothered to tell her. But no choice is provided. Scientists stand lower than warriors, especially when said scientists are not currently useful. And Papyrus is a Royal Guardsman. His orders are just slightly less urgent than Asgore’s. Moreover, there is that issue, so Alphys knows better than to disobey.

She follows Papyrus inside the house, keeping the same blank face. All emotions, if she still has those, are hidden behind the cloudy glasses. Papyrus squints at her. It is impossible to understand what she thinks or feels, and that is quite unsettling. But he keeps that to himself. It’s not like they are close enough to be annoyed by things like that.

“S-so? What’s happened?”

“THERE IS A PROBLEM THAT HAS PROVEN DIFFICULT TO SOLVE. I ASSUMED YOU COULD GIVE ME A HAND IN THIS.”

The cloudy glasses turn at him.

“Theoretically, wh-what reasons do I have to d-do so?”

“THEORETICALLY, YOU DON’T WANT ANYONE – FOR EXAMPLE, UNDYNE - TO KNOW ABOUT YOUR LITTLE HOBBY, RIGHT?”

Alphys squeezes her eyes shut and flinches. Her face is dark with fear for a moment, and that’s the second time Papyrus has seen her actually react to something. Then she stares at the guard blankly again.

“W-what do you w-want m-me to d-do?”

Papyrus waves at her to follow him and leads her to the small dark room.

“I FORBID YOU TO TELL ANYONE ABOUT THIS”.

Alphys pauses in the doorway. She gives the skeleton on the mattress a thoughtful look and locks her fingers together.

“I…” A deep breath. “I see why you w-would ask me for help”. She takes off her coat, opens her bag, lowers herself to Sans, cuts his clothes open without much respect and starts a quick examination. Her plump hands in surgical gloves flutter all over his body like two white birds of prey, with a well-studied grace and swiftness. “You probably shouldn’t w-worry, Papyrus. I’m fairly g-good at keeping s-secrets”.

“NOT AS GOOD AS YOU THINK, THOUGH”, Papyrus growls impatiently. “OTHERWISE YOU WOULDN’T HAVE…”

“Yes, I know”, mumbles the scientist. After a moment she stands back and looks at Papyrus exhaustedly. “W-well. That’s it”.

“THAT’S IT WHAT? I HAVE NO TIME FOR PUZZLES RIGHT NOW!!!”

“That’s w-what it looks like”, says Alphys, locking her fingers again. “He… it is safe to say he f-fell d-d-down. After all, it is almost surprising that it took him th-that long to succumb. Even stronger monsters didn’t p-prove immune to this. And he was n-not…” She understands that she stepped too close to the boundary and shrugs it off. “However, I w-would call it… an hour. Maybe two. He h-has low HP by default, so… it shouldn’t take long for him to turn to d-dust. One c-could probably advise you to t-take care of him soon, if you don’t want to waste the EXP, but I would not v-voice such a reckless opinion, of c-course”.

Papyrus stares at the dirty mattress.

Fell down. That is little less than a death warrant. The only difference is that the torture is a bit longer. From now on things won’t ever be the same. From now on, there is no Sans, just a living corpse ready to dust any minute. He has fallen down. That’s it.

      Papyrus can’t help but admit that this thought feels strangely… liberating.