whenever i write smut for diluc i tend to forget to write the actual smut scenes because i always add too much descriptions of romance in the fics and how much he loves you, i just want to make it clear in my writing that his love has no bounds and how diluc loves you is very intense. listen, this man is such a passionate lover, he is blooming from how you allow him to love you until he feels how you become this beacon of hope to him. i just have to get my point across on this, he is so akin to mr. darcy from pride & prejudice, diluc is a good man, he is intelligent and kind to people, he protects them, he is wise too, funny in his own type of way. what else is that he would die for you. he would kill for you. he would conquer the world for you. diluc would do it all and look utterly handsome while doing it! case closed.
some viktors in czech and polish folk costume and a less specific miscellany from the past few months :-) i have to draw very very small with this pen which feels appropriate for him
[id: two pages of digital drawings done with a fine pixel brush. the first image is a series of coloured drawings of viktor standing in a variety of costumes. common articles across the outfits are puffy white shirts, colourful breeches, embroidered waistcoats, and decorative flowers. in each drawing viktor is smiling and leaning on his cane. the second image is a selection of drawings of viktor standing and sitting in various poses, looking generally cheerful. in one he is sitting next to barbie, who is smiling at him. the text beside it reads ‘Barbie (they are friends)’. end id.]
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saw alot of comments on prev pages; saying 'i HATE that mean teacher! im gonna FIGHT HIM!!' & i LOVE the energy!! it WOULD be nice. to have that catharsis. but the story of young tidestrider is Not one of catharsis. it is a story of being so small and so special and sucking so bad.
i think this is the most genuine emotion we've seen from nikolai ever. and the fact he seems unsure about how he's feeling, how it's seemingly contradicting, imo works really well with his character
he's all about saying things that contradict each other and imo, there is always some truth to both sides of what he says
so. here. i think some part of him was happy to be free of his only bond... but then it got overtaken with the part of him that realizes this bond wasn't. like. as constricting as he first thought
it seems that at the end of it all he somehow even WANTED to get that bond running deeper. imo, it was to feed both sides of him - the side that wants to be free can't actually prove his free will if they weren't that close in the first place, they barely interacted before, it's almost like killing any other person. on the other hand, he also genuinely likes fyodor and wants to be closer bc well. he is "perfectly sane". he is, underneath it all, still a person deep down, as much as he might hate that.
when fyodor threatens to take him out in the future he doesn't seem scared, but he also doesn't seem particularly excited i think? (or maybe that's just how he expresses his genuine, non-performative excitement, who knows.) at the same time, he also doesn't seem to want to kill him now, to follow him, like he's keeping it for that new game he was just promised
but then fyodor dies. and he won't get a chance to play it. and in a way, that takes from his freedom too, isn't it? his freedom to choose how his bond with fyodor will be. in a way, fyodor dying took away from his free will.
i truly believe nikolai is. maybe not selfish but certainly self-centered or self-serving enough to be sad over, and forgive me for this analogy, his toy getting broken. I'm certain he's also genuinely sad about his only friend dying, and so gruesomely too, but i wouldn't be surprised if at his core this is what makes him this sad. and i think that also leads to his conflicting emotions about fyodor's death
i also think that thing dazai pointed out about fyodor's lack of trust plays a part in nikolai's grief here. to him, fyodor is the only one who understood him, the only one who made him feel seen, and as far as we know the only person who was important to him. but he probably knew the feeling wasn't mutual. still, this was the nail in the coffin, confirming fyodor never saw him as a friend as well, not even as an ally.
i don't have an actual conclusion here, just speculation on nikolai's internal turmoil and how he might feel now. i really hope (and expect) we will see him again, and i wonder if this event will change anything about him.
i speculated in the past that his eye cover is a symbol of his bond with fyodor. and today, he took it off after fyodor died. i wonder, if the next time we see nikolai, he will still wear it or not (or possibly wear a new one). i guess we'll see!
i was so happy that ganondorf was a character in totk when it was announced but now i am just sad about it honestly, i get that the older games had the trio as a good kids VS evil old guy thing, but i sincerely hoped that how much botw revolutionized(?) about the zelda principle in terms of gameplay they would now have the chance to do so, at least a little bit, in totk with the story
and then, as much as i like his design, hes again just an already very old evil guy that appeared out of nowhere for all we know that needs to be stopped by some kids/really young people and all the crumbs of personality or well ... not even crumbs but pure idea of a backstory we have to interpret into it all from things like manner of speech, animation and design elements bc all he does is some evil monologing that doesnt even serve well for interpretation
like, he was already so old when we first see him, what did he do all his life?? like even if he only turned aggressive once rauru founded this version of hyrule he had to have lived idk 50 years before that, was he just a regular leader of his people before that?? was he just .. some dude??
all we actually know is ... old evil guy shows up and attacks the perfect and good kingdom (tm) dont we? maybe some vague, arbitrary you denied me *generic villain thing like power, rule etc* line but thats it?
(i dont mind having to read between the lines, it can be very fun, but it also depends on if you are reading between lines and theres something intentionally left there or if you are trying really hard to see something but theres nothing actually there for you to find; to be clear, i also like creating your own ideas around stuff, but when you get to know some people from basically birth to their prime time and then theres a guy thats just there to be an endboss and even now in modern games doesnt get anything beyond a neat design and fun bossfight its just ... so flat?sad? i love interpeting but i also wouldnt mind to see something more for once ..)
So like. I'm reading school bus graveyard again and. are we like SURE that Ashlyn's dad got taken too? In episode 62 Taylor says that they're only going to the school to ask about the keys and her dad mentioned getting breakfast afterwards so they weren't going to school all day that day. so then why would he drive all the way home if he was just going to pick the kids up like ten minutes later. and in the next couple ones it doesn't look like he's in the house with the other adults. on the other hand. when aiden noticed that their parents were in the facility too i think he would've mentioned not seeing ashlyn's dad
i love senshi so much he’s my bestie he’s a goober he’s an ICON. i’m almost done w the anime and these pictures alone are the reason of why i’m gonna read the manga <3
inarticulate waffle about dan and boundaries below the cut as to not clog up the dash
dan's attempts at gently setting and reminding his audience of his boundaries is so fascinating. he really did try to have a mutual understanding/respect with people who watched his videos and also followed him on social media of like...letting dinof not be too personal and have some kind of separation betwee dan and dinof (good example: "there are several things in my life that are none of the internet's business" vyou)
this video in particular is interesting because he goes on to talk about being back on dailybooth (which was really personal and intimate) how people should check his out, but it's like he assumes there's the understanding that he's not going to talk about the things on his db on youtube?
like he was way more kind about it than the lawless internet culture warranted and i hate that sometimes there's this picture painted of him that he's always been angry and defensive at his subscribers. i also think it's easy for people who joined the fandom after 2013ish to think he's always had that bubbling resentment but he really did try to be nice about keeping his personal life private (and not just his sexuality but even things like the whole adrian ordeal or people literally commenting/harassing his ex gfs social media)
idk it's easy to assume the angry dinof persona is the genuine dan, especially when you don't see him in other mediums like liveshows or videos of him interacting with fans or even the gaming channel where he doesn't have such a guard up and unmasks a bit. but god he just really is gentle and kind and has spent his career trying to stay that way with the people who support him, despite the reception and consistent disrespect back at him.
this doesn't really have a point other than i don't think he gets enough credit for staying as kind as he is (and i mean real dan, not dystopia daily dan) and still being willing to have the kind of unique bond with his audience that he's always been infamous for (which also is astounding how they've both managed to walk that line so well considering other creators being either too close or too blocked off from their fanbase).
idk it's just interesting how he's trying to say a lot without saying a lot and how this 18 year old kid really hoped for the best in people despite everything. dan has stayed a genuinely a lovely person when most people at this point would have become far more jaded and that's beyond impressive.