#I lost the plot

[bnesszai]

can i give a prompt for angst war :00

here!

"I thought you of all people would understand" "then was your first mistake, I'm not a person, and neither are you,"

for anyone <3

"I thought you of all people would understand," Dazai says, voice deceptively even.

A short, harsh laugh bursts from Chuuya's lungs. "That was your first mistake. I'm not a fucking person, and neither are you."

Something flashes across Dazai's face, there and gone in a moment. He lifts his chin, looking down at Chuuya with dark, dark eyes. Eyes that have not been such an endless voids since his Mafia days. It's like looking in a mirror.

"At least I know where I come from," Dazai says, voice scathing. "Confirmed flesh and blood."

"God forgot to put a soul in there. Just an empty sack of skin."

"And what does that make you? A vessel for destruction? A tool? A poor imitation of humanity?"

Anger boils in Chuuya's blood. Craters form under his feet. "I fucking hate you."

"I hate when you lie to me."

"You're right. Hate isn't a strong enough word."

Dazai throws back his glass of whiskey. "You, out of anyone I know, should understand what it's like."

Chuuya feels his power thrumming under his skin. It wants out. It wants to destroy the monster in front of him.

You should understand what it feels like to want to rip yourself apart.

[thedeathdeelers]

a quick silly drabble for @saltedsan based on this post

//

otter (on ao3)

“So, Sol-a,” Sunjae starts as he looks up from the script in his hands. “What do you think about dogs?”

Sol, who was snuggled into his side on the sofa, answers absent-mindedly with her eyes still glued to the TV.

“Dogs?”

Sunjae gently nudges her to get her full attention. “Yes, Dogs. A dog. A puppy.”

“Um,” she starts, before finally turning to look at him. “I..I’ve always liked dogs,” she says, “But my mom was allergic so we could never get one.” She pauses to think before resuming. “But I think I’ve always liked the idea of having a dog more than actually owning a dog, y’know?”

Sunjae stares at her for a moment, waiting to see if she realises her mistake.

But all Sol does is stare up at him expectantly, eyes wide and sweetly innocent.

“I think I’m probably more of a cat person anyway,” she adds, shrugging.

Huh.

continue reading on ao3

Sol grins at him when he doesn’t say anything back, before turning her attention back to the TV.

Sunjae sits quietly for a beat before trying again.

“So then what about Otter?”

Sol, who had already gotten fully immersed in her show again looks up at Sunjae, eyes slightly unfocused.

“Otter? Who’s otter?” she asks.

“You know,” Sunjae waves his hand in front of them before draping it back around her shoulder, tucking her back in under his arm. “Otter, your childhood dog.” Sol’s face doesn’t change, the layer of confusion still very much there.

“The one who loved swimming.”

Sol’s bottom lip twitches.

“The one you compared me to in high school.”

Sunjae can see the moment she remembers, memories flooding in as understanding dawns in her eyes even as she tries very hard to keep a straight face.

“O-o-of course he- he was real,” she finally stutters out, laughing a little too loudly as she tries to scoot away from him. “Why- why would you ask?”

Sunjae stares at her for a long moment, head tilting to the side as Sol squirms under his gaze, eyes looking at anything but him.

She was avoiding his eyes — she knew he knew.

“Sol.”

She doesn’t budge, eyes now fixed on the TV even though he knew she wasn’t registering anything happening on the screen.

“Sol-a,” he tries again, this time in a sing-song tone.

Still nothing — only her fingers nervously fiddling with the frayed edge of her sweater giving her away.

Sunjae smirks, knowing he’s got her.

He turns his body to face her, arms coming down to cage her in — wrapping one arm around her waist from the back while his other rests on her thighs.

He feels her jump slightly at his touch.

Leaning in closer so that they were at the same eye level, Sunjae waits until Sol crumbles under the pressure and turns to look at him, gulping nervously in the process.

“So let me get this straight,” he says, finger tapping against her thigh. “You had me think that I reminded you, the girl I was crazy for, of a dead fictional dog all throughout our last year of high school?”

Sol doesn’t react for a moment, until he sees the tiniest of nods.

“All because you’re terrible at thinking on the spot?”

Sol hesitates, mouth opening as if to defend herself, only to snap it shut at the dubious stare Sunjae was sending her way.

She nods again.

Sunjae doesn’t really know how to react — he’d always suspected she had come up with that story just to dodge any time travelling related information, but there was always a tiny part of young Sunjae that worried he was too ‘puppy-like’ for her to take him seriously.

Sunjae snorts at the thought, almost rolling his eyes at his young self.

They were both just as bad as the other.

He focuses his attention back on Sol, who was still staring at him wide-eyed.

“I swear it was- I only did it to- I wasn’t lying about being a fan!!” She finally gets out with a worried expression on her face as her eyes search his for a sign of..something.

Sunjae relents at the sight of her genuine worry, sighing dramatically as he pulls back.

“Sol, we really need to work on your acting,” he says, shaking his head.

“M-my acting? Why-“

“And we really should discuss your naming skills.”

“I-“

“But for now, we should probably think of a punishment.”

“A- a..a what?” she asks, eyes widening at his words.

Sunjae grins at her, leaning forward as she tries to move away from him, only to pounce on her the second her back hits the sofa cushion.

The first he hears are her giggles, his favourite sound in the world.

And then comes the pleading, his fingers digging into her sides as she breathlessly begs him to relent.

He loved that she was ticklish.

His torturing session doesn’t last long, as he soon takes pity on her, leaning down to press a kiss to her forehead before sitting back up, pulling her along with him.

He watches her as she tries to catch her breath, her face glowing with rose-tinted cheeks.

Sunjae feels his heart constrict, still unable to believe she was truly his.

He waits until she’s calmed down, fanning herself in an attempt to cool down; waits until she turns around to scold him-

Before ducking back in towards her to give her a quick peck, successfully cutting her off.

“Sunjae-a!” She gets out, a half-hearted scowl on her face as she struggles to keep the smile off her face.

God, he loved her. Terrible acting and all.

Sunjae gets up from the sofa, leaving a confused Sol behind, only to turn around and scoop her up in his arms, the sounds of her surprised laugh filling up the apartment.

“What are you-“

But he doesn’t let her finish her sentence, cutting her off by pressing a kiss to her cheek.

With a wide grin stretching wider across his face by the second, Sunjae walks around the sofa and carries the love of his life towards their bedroom.

It only takes Sol a second to realise where he was taking her, slapping him once on the chest before giving in, her shy and scandalised giggles following them all the way to bed.

[fedefededef]

jujutsu GAUCHO

[sillylilyposting]

Of course Lily doesn’t like YouTube. She clearly is negative to her fans, attacks anyone who even dares to recommend her something, and uses every recent video to challenge criticism and her own views. “I don’t have a third graders tastes in shows, I just like wholesome media.” “I don’t have a creepy incest fetish, I just think siblings should cuddle.” “Y’all should stop praising shows I hate for having gay characters because Canada had these gay stereotypes first.”

Overall Lily can set boundaries but she always justifys them wierdly (she can do that but like they always come from a bitter place) not wanting to have recommendations thrown at her all the time by strangers sure ig

It's weird but

Despite claiming stuff like boundaries her reasoning that people want their opinions validated (she truely believes this)

instead of you know wantin to sharing something they think someone they watch/respect/constantly bemoans the lack of x type of media

I was only a fan of hers briefly so idk if she always used her videos to shadowbox her random internet beefs but thas certainly became more prevalent as times gone on her videos more embittered and toxic an repetitive her problems with every adventure fantasy show that cared to have a plot an not be an animated children's sitcom her strange relationship of berating her fans for steppin outta line (still not over that donation thing) her takes on her own family an how wrong people are for treating their siblings like siblings instead of a separate skin they can (an in her mind should) crawl inside of

Everythin combined here just strikes me as a really hateful insecure an petty person who still feels like she's owed something by the world an takes it out on her fans that support her because of et

[sagescider]

quick redesign warmup before working on zine things ! the original is from like 2021 i think??

[uselessvaldemarsimp]

another reason i am switching to cds is because APPS LIKE PINTEREST AND TUMBLR AND PICREW AND ROBLOX KEEP TURNING MY MUSIC OFF WHY LET ME LIVE DANGIT

[pyxy-doesnt-exist]

Yes, hi, I, @pyxy-styx , made another side blog. This one is for writing. Criticism is appreciated, but be nice, or I will cry /hj

(Please note that I don't think my poems actually count as poetry. That's just what someone else called them and it stuck)

Tags:

OCs: #Those Guys

Poems: #Poems(?)

Short stories: #I threw words at a page

Works in Progress: #An attempt was made

Main universe: #The Sable-Blake Cinematic Universe

Stories: #I lost the plot

Fake Twitter posts: #They broke into Twitter oh no

[little7soldier]

This is how I feel after watching the first 2 episodes of 4 minutes

[gaysforbyler]

I need to stop predicting word counts and then ending up doubling them. I can’t shut up.

[shegore]

Does karin understand love ?

i'm answering this in the ask itself because it's such a good question~

i think the answer to this is a little bit complicated and depends on a myriad of factors ( age , canon (v) au , who is claiming to love her , who she is claiming to love , what kind of love is it , etc. )

without a doubt, karin understands what love is chemically and what it means to love as a social construct. those are things she observed and studied to help her 'experience the human condition.' however, for most of her childhood, karin lacked a lot of love. her mother died young, her father abandoned her and she was shuffled through homes until ultimately ending up in the care of the most notorious abuser orochimaru. that severely impacted karin's ability to experience the love of a family and she didn't get to see what it is like to be cared by someone who cares about you BECAUSE you are you . instead, it was always transactional ( & one way with her doing all the giving. )

karin gave up on affection & then refused to show it. she began kicking and screaming outwardly, then inwardly, and eventually, it stopped happening at all. she thought she could thrive if she killed off any desire for affection, she'd be a better person for it. hence, she's quite cold when she chooses to be. cruel, cold, callous , these are all words i've used before. she focused on her studies and so her emotional interest in other could be counted on one hand.

even in verses where she has more of a mother's love (i.e. her mother survives and keeps her) , she's still her father's daughter. she's nor as warm as she could be, love confuses her, she doesn't get it. she doesn't understand the amount of vulnerability love takes.

i doubt she wants to get it either. any and every time she's vulnerable, it's resulted in near death or an absolute shattering of self. ( let's say sasuke ) it's easier to reject everything. it's easier to kill something, poison something, dissect something you care for, rather than overcome the hurdle. ( it almost sounds like a critical control issue, but that's neither here nor there. )

karin is frequently the object of emotional betrayal / usage. and each time it makes her close up more and hardened more. hence, the response of killing rather than kissing.

though . . . she would be okay with being loved and loved innocently. nothing something that'll result in harm or came from cruelty.

[sexy-ass-dwarf-man]

So I kinda wanted to vent a little it's not bad but I just wanted to voice my thoughts.

*YAPP FEST AHEAD*

So I see a lot of fanfic authors apologizing for 'cliches' and 'overused themes/topics' but I can't help but think that's, most of the time, better than a whole new trope.

I just finished a fic where the author was apologizing for the above reason and I went to the comments and someone said (quote) "never apologize for including recurring themes! Just as I will eat hundreds of chocolate chip cookies made by as many different people and enjoy it every time, I will read the same sort of fics and adore them."(quote)

And I just couldn't help thinking the cookie this hits so well imo.

Because (almost) everybody love a Choco chip cookie but people also like oatmeal, macadamia nut, and even raisin. It's nice to have a Choco cookie every once and a while but a red velvet cookie might sound nice instead or a s'mores one. I think it's like how some people like 'enemies to lovers' or 'smut' or just 'fluff' or some people like to stay closer to the canon and others like to make a whole other world or do crazy crossovers. I just like seeing that in a fandom people liking cookies and smut lol. Idk where I was going with this but yeah....

👍

[raepliica]

i think they should take turns cuddling for healing purposes

[marcheriest]

[potato-lord-but-not]

what do you pray to?

or alternatively: Oscar sees John for the person he is and John gets to be forgiven

[a0vy]

shh, he’s contemplating terraforming his hideout

[aldecaver]

Just two silly guys spinning together