#I love Combeferre so much

[tjjamess]

Combeferre either sounds like the ‘um actually ☝️🤓’ voice or he sounds like Josh Groban there is no in between

[formulaheart]

I love versions of Les Mis that show other members of the amis interacting with eponine because even if it isn't brick accurate I could write a whole novel about how she is the epitome of the people they are fighting so hard for and seeing enjolras show her the pamphlet and have a conversation with her and jehan adjust her cap and feuilly tugging her braid as he passes during look down, and bahorel and grantaire trying to force her out while they build a barricade and all of them cry when she dies just has me in my feels and they all could've been so much more

[courfee]

ah yes, the happy soft vibes for the @sillylovesongsfest, you get it...

based on the assigned prompted song Till Forever Falls Apart by Ashe and FINNEAS, as well as this photo shooting

So this is it, that's how it ends I guess there's nothing more romantic than dying with your friends

for an even sadder and bloody version look under the cut <33

[art-o-gant]

some silly little drawings

[pallases]

love how hugo’s like courfeyrac is just like tholomyes if tholomyes didn’t FUCKING SUCK

[cubexr]

somebody: hey what’s you favorite musical?

me: les misérables

somebody: oh really how come you never listen to it

me: yeah lol i am not mentally strong enough

[sharkemojis]

ok i love a big angst with a happy ending love confession as much as the next guy but also. i give you enjolras and grantaire who randomly just start sitting closer and are always touching and hanging out even if half of their conversations are cruel arguments, grantaire gets bored and lonely and goes around to enjolras apartment one day and just?? Never leaves?? And enjolras is cool with it. And then they probably fuck at some point. Start showing up to places as a duo. Share a bedroom. Basically become a couple but literally never not once have the conversation but like... its fine bc they don't have to you know. Everyones like what the even fuck are you guys doing and theyre just like ?? What do u mean? I don't know just thinking about soulmates! ExR and i feel like it would transpire so infuriatingly casually. Courfeyrac was expecting a big bang in the universe, combeferre is in shock partly. Boyfriends that never call each other boyfriends. What do u think

[syrupsyche]

PLEASE say more about your modern enjolras headcanons. I want to hear everything

HI!!!! thank you so much for your ask ❤️ I love talking about Enjolras :) here is a doodle of my modern AU version of him:

Some random headcanons I have!

He's always Asian to me; I like to envision him as half-Korean!

Like I mentioned in my Markiplier post, he barely tastes his food 😭 he simply views it as sustenance and has no great love or hatred for any dish. When pressed about what his favourite is, he'd either speak a classic French or Korean dish and cite it as a "childhood favourite" but honestly he really doesn't care!

Because of that ^, he eats food like a vacuum cleaner. If he's out in a restaurant with friends, he'd spend the rest of the time drinking cups of coffee.

He sleeps like a corpse, lying flat on his back like 🧍‍♂️. His breathing is always really shallow too when he's asleep so every Ami have shaken him awake in terror before, thinking he stopped breathing in the middle of the night. He has since attempted to position himself in a more normal sleeping state to not worry his friends, but his corpse state is his natural state

He doesn't have favourite music at all; again when pressed, he'd offer some classical music as an answer but he's literally so disconnected. No spotify, no ipod, nothing. He only uses his earbuds to listen to voice messages (which the Amis send /very frequently/. But Enjolras likes to listen to them all! That's his source of entertainment)

On the flipside, he's very serious when it comes to watching films or shows. He thinks they reflect much about the sociopolitical state of the world (even if they aren't "serious" media) and would religiously log his Letterboxd review after every watch + analyse it with Combeferre, Feuilly, or Prouvaire. He would watch Despicable Me and go: "An interesting film exploring the complexities of a man ostracised from society and relegating himself to such a role in life as a result. A heartfelt story unfolds when he learns to care for three young children who show him blablablabl...."

He cuts his own hair. And it STILL looks good.

Thank you once again for allowing me to indulge in my headcanons! 🫶

[enjolraspermettendo]

Les Amis during exams

(I am basing this on my personal uni experience, in my country most of the exams are spoken interrogations)

Combeferre: has read all the textbook, his notes are the sacred texts, he actively participated in class so much that the professor only asks him one question and gives him the max

Courfeyrac: he's a master of the art of bullshitting. Talks for an hour without actually saying anything, this charming bastard made the professor believe he knows the material when he didn't even study.

Enjolras: he's one of those fuckers that doesn't study but magically seems to know the material. He's have amazing grades, if only he wasn't one of those pretentious students that get into fights with the professor, even during the fucking exams

Joly: he's the one that nearly goes into a panic attack while waiting for his turn, keeps asking everyone before him what the professor wanted to know. He's the one that insists he's going to fail but aces it anyway

Bossuet: he has studied, he's ready, he got to the classroom on time, everything is fine... Except that he forgot to sign up for the exam, he now has to wait for next semester

Bahorel: couldn't sign up for the exam because of his nonexistent attendance, has to repeat the course

Marius: he starts spitting out word for word the material, but once the professor asks him to elaborate on it based on what he thinks he blanks out. Average student

Grantaire: this is the exam that he has been dragging behind for 4 years now and still hasn't passed. Has no more fucks to give about it. Didn't wake up that morning and missed the exam, he's now going "fuori corso" (fuori corso is when you don't graduate in the usual years, normally 3, and now have to pay more tuition for every added year)

Feuilly: he's the kid that studies so fucking hard because he's on a merit scholarship. The professors love him, sometimes his attendance isn't great because he has to work but the professor turn a blind eye when his friends sign his attendance for him

Jehan: I feel like he's one of those kids that prepare something for the exams when the professors allow it, like their own artistic interpretation of the material. The professors sometimes appreciate the effort and initiative, sometimes hate it.

[found-family-tournament]

Found Family Tournament Round 2 Part 9 Group 43

Propaganda and further images under the cut

Les Amis de l’ABC: Enjolras, Combeferre, Courfeyrac, Grantaire, Joly, Feuilly, Jean Prouvaire, Bahorel, Bossuet

Newsies: Jack Kelly, Crutchie, Davey, Racetrack, Spot Conlon (etc.)

Les Amis de l’ABC:

they're very silly ok. they're a little revolutionary group of students and they want to fight for The Cause and stuff??? i mean they all die but they all die together, yk? and they just,,, they care so much for each other i just know it. even though in the book/musical they're fairly minor characters? the fandom loves them and portrays them as a sort of found family. basically i love them very much and so do pretty much all my fellow les mis likers <3

Newsies:

they are just a bunch of kids but they strike against the most powerful men in new york and WIN together. they all support each other without even hesitating because they know that everyone is in it together. jack is going to leave them and move away from new york but then they're like 'what's santa fe got that new york ain't ? or better yet, what's new york got that santa fe ain't ? new york's got us, and we're family' so he stays and jdbdndfn they are amazing

[black-rabbit-razumikhin]

Raz Reads Les Mis (XX)

Marius - Friends of the A B C

This chapter was incredibly fun, and introduced a cast that could carry the rest of this book

But I don't want them to because I want to see Valjean again

We meet the original Dead Poets Society, or at least the political French version of them

Their membership being comprised of Enjolras, Combeferre, Prouvaire, Feuilly, Courfeyrac, Bahorel, Lesgle, Joly and Gran

taire

Enjolras is our natural leader, our beauty, our pillar of everything the Friends of the A B C aspire to, the logic, the backbone

Combeferre is the water to Enjolras' fire, the philosophy to his logic, the balance to his passion

Prouvaire (or Jehan) loves love, he is the soft romantic, he will bring flowers to a first date

Feuilly is an orphan and lives of hard work for low pay, obsessed with international relations and adopting the people of France when there was nobody there to adopt him

Courfeyrac is the exact same character as Tholomyes, but I beg to disagree - I have a hit on Tholomyes, I'd be friends with Courfeyrac

Hugo creates a trilogy of Enjolras, Combeferre and Courfeyrac; Enjolras the chief, Combeferre the guide, Courfeyrac the centre

Bahorel's whole personality is that he never wants to be a lawyer and sees even the law school as a carrier of infectious disease

Lesgle (called Bousseut) is berated for a whole page for being bald at 25 - this is just ergonomical for French summers, leave him alone

Joly is our medic, who is also a hypochondriac and if he were around today he'd run a witchcraft Tumblr

Grantaire is apparently ugly and in love with Enjolras and compared to both Patroclus and Hephaestion

I have opinions on Enjolras and Grantaire

But I will treat them as platonic (and not unrequited pining) and a metaphor until evidence suggests otherwise

And I think Courfeyrac is my favourite, from these descriptions at least - the irony

This is the group that Marius stumbles upon, all because he and Bousseut share a law class together that Marius didn't attend

Courfeyrac meets Bousseut and Marius while they are talking together at a cafe and Marius is introduced to the rest of the Friends

Courfeyrac calls him "a pupil" when he learns of Marius' political ideology - a little too pro-Napoleon for the Friends, but Courfeyrac's whole intro screams "I can fix him"

The Friends are drinking and Grantiare is rambling about 100 different topics, making the sort of sense that someone drunk will, the sort that they probably don't realise themselves doing

Somehow, through fate, the conversation turns to Waterloo

Waterloo! Marius knows Waterloo

The impassioned, naieve child talks with so much pride of how much he adores and respects Napoleon

The Friends are shocked into silence

But Enjolras is there to lead him out of the darkness of the woods

Poor Marius is confused for where his beliefs now lie, but the pupil will soon learn

Rent becomes due for his hotel, which Courfeyrac offers to pay, but Marius insists on doing himself

"Yeah I'll just sell my clothes and learn English and German and I'll be fine"

His principles even stop him from accepting financial aid from his aunt

And thus is how the life of Marius begins

This chapter was great! I really enjoyed meeting all the Friends and seeing their unique personalities and viewpoints all start to blend into one unified group. @pilferingapples is your url lifted from Grantaire's rant perhaps? I can just imagine him drunk and jovial and telling the Friends anything and everything that comes into his mind. He and Enjolras seem like the perfect opposites to bookend the society of the Friends with. And I want to know how Marius fares! Does his mind change? Is he accepted? Does he manage to find his way in the world?

[tjjamess]

To YOU he’s just a 192 year old dead revolutionary medical student who represented the logic of the revolution who lived much more normal than his counterpart, who was more human than man, the homo to vir, who liked the word citizen but preferred the word man and would gladly say hombre, who read everything, did theatres, followed lectures, explained the functions of artery’s, followed science, deciphered hieroglyphics, broke stones to look inside them, drew silk moths from memory, corrected the dictionary, both asserted and denied nothing, daydreamed, who was involved in issues of education, wanted society to raise intellectual and moral standards, believed that the narrowness of teachings and the scholastic prejudice would turn collages into artificial oyster farms, who was well-read, a purist, precise, polytechnical, hardworking, imaginative, who dreamed of trains and better surgical operations and fixing cameras and electric telegraphs and steering hot air balloons, who was the guide to the leader, who was not incapable of fighting but would rather be gentle, who wanted neither halt nor haste, who would rather let progress take its course rather than worship and incite revolutionary adventures, coolheaded but pure, methodical but irreproachable, phlegmatic but imperturbable, and who believed ‘good must be innocent’

To ME he’s everything

[pilferingapples]

OK my random question for you to think over is— If you could schedule some bonding time between Jean Valjean and any one of Les Amis, which Ami would you choose? Who would he click with/who would help him out the most/who would be the best most helpful Buddy for him to have ??? Or would you need to pick multiple Amis?

(This may or may not be related to a future fic idea I have planned. I have asked myself this question but currently do not know the answer, so I am curious about your thoughts! You always have great Les Amis takes)

OK before I get into this, I want to be clear that I think Cosette does an AMAZING job with Valjean's emotional Everything, but (a) she's a kid (b) she's HIS kid (c) no one person, no matter how close or important, can ever supply all of another person's emotional needs, even if they're a lot less traumatized than Valjean to start (d) a major problem with Valjean is Social Isolation, which only people Besides Cosette can alleviate (e) that is just the start of the issues that Cosette can't and should never have to handle alone! So no consideration of adding Other Friends to Valjean's life should be taken as an insult from me to Cosette (and I know you wouldn't , but people get weird). Cosette is a star.

Also: I am in all of this assuming a setting/ series of events leading to Acquaintance that does right by both parties ; importantly, that means Valjean is sure, somehow, that none of these men are romantically interested in or romantically interesting to Cosette. Maybe it's post- marriage, maybe it's an AU, maybe Whatever. Valjean's not doing his Lion With a Dog routine about it.

OK THAT SAID, let's Consider:

Enjolras: if they met outside a barricade, I can see them getting along very well! Unfortunately, that's because without pressing political action or conversation be thrown at them, I can imagine them both just sitting quietly and reading or being lost in their thoughts for as long as they're hanging out. Even GIVEN a political topic, like..Valjean is not gonna argue with anything Enjolras says and Enjolras is already gonna say it and they are just...gonna continue to Agree and then go back to Quiet Reading Time. Parallel Play For The Cats. Valjean will think Enjolras is a pleasant young man, Enjolras will think Valjean is a restful older gentleman, they will go to the library at the same time every Wednesday and nod hello and read in chairs near each other and never talk. Probably exactly the kind of interaction Valjean wants, and not at all what he needs to get out of his routine.

Combeferre: a very strong option!! assuming they've gotten talking about Nearly Anything, Combeferre can find the Fun Conversational Trivia in any subject. I bet Valjean would LOVE to hear about how steam engines work and the latest discoveries about bees or rubber or tinctures of opium. Valjean might be willing to tell him Cool Gardening and Metallurgy Knowledge and Combeferre would LISTEN. Combeferre is sharp and cutting about Interests and Ideas, but shows no signs of being someone who wants to get more emotional or personal with people than they're already setting up. This could be a great Hobby Buddy friendship and that's something Valjean really needs! Potential Issues: if they DO run into the sort of conversation where they're debating ideas, Combeferre does not seem to have an Easy Mode. IDK how much Valjean would be willing to enter Debate Thunderdome about politics or social issues; I worry greatly that he would shut down in Automatic Defense System Mode. But if they can work around that, Combeferre could be so good for getting him interested in the outside world!

Prouvaire: Much as above for Combeferre, except Prouvaire is already something of a gardener, DOES have a Gentle mode for debates, AND is goth, which would surely speak to Valjean's " some alive people like to be in coffins too" soul. Also lbr we know Prouvaire is on the 420 Crew in any era and it might do Valjean some real good to get baked once in a while. Strong potential here.

Feuilly: HE'S LIKE THE SON VALJEAN MIGHT HAVE KNOWN, or the grandson really-- as I recall, we've done the math and figured out that Feuilly really might be in the right age range to be one of Valjean's nibling's kids. I don't know how much Valjean has ever considered international politics but I bet he would deeply resonate with the plight of refugees and the displaced, which after all is a lot of the real issue. And maybe from there they can even get into how this is all systemic and Valjean might start to understand how he's not Uniquely Horrible if these injustices happen to so many people!!! A Little !!! Possibly!! Either way,they can get earnest and emotional over just wanting everyone else to have a better deal than they got. Go Team Lower Class Orphans Too Good For This World !

Courfeyrac: listen Courfeyrac's a delight and all but..he's just very bourgeois student. He is. Even assuming we're in the best situation where he and Valjean are talking politics and social issues enough for Valjean to NOT just mentally write him off as Standard Student Guy, I suspect Courfeyrac's many charms are just the wrong ones here. I'm not saying they can't get along, I think Courfeyrac can probably get alone with nearly anyone,but this is gonna be one of the harder options for any real connection.

Bahorel: you know I was all ready to go on a big ramble about how this could go multiple ways until I remembered the ONE THING, THE ONLY THING that gets Valjean to really open up and talk about his past is watching a younger man make horrible life choices that could get him arrested, never mind about trying to get Valjean to open up, Valjean is gonna trauma-dump on Bahorel so hard in the first fifteen minutes of them actually hanging out. And unlike Montparnasse, Bahorel pays attention and gives a damn about other people, and he is SO ready to get into how the legal system is pure evil and screws everyone over. Hating the legal system is a major component of his personality! I had honestly not really realized it until making this post but wow this will, eventually, be So Good for Valjean's mental health. (I am perhaps being a little silly here but I do think, on consideration, that Bahorel's over the top Everything would be on balance kinda reassuring for Valjean; plus there IS the goth factor XD Bonus points if it's a Better Post-Barricades setting where Bahorel's taken in Gavroche and they can bond over Unexpected Child Acquisition)

Legle: For Legle, see Courfeyrac, I'm afraid. You KNOW I love Bossuet so very much but he speaks 90 percent in too-smart-by-half puns and references and his entire social presentation depends on knowing how to parlay a bourgeois social skillset into Endless Crash Space. He's super weird and an incredibly good guy For Real but I don't know if Valjean would put enough effort in to realize that! Like with Courfeyrac, I feel like this would just be a Polite Acquaintaceship. Open to being convinced otherwise though!

Joly: ..ok I know Joly is also Student Guy as heck, but he's also direct and enthusiastic and overtly sweet in a way that Courfeyrac and Legle aren't. I can see Valjean enjoying his company somewhat the way he enjoys Cosette's actually-- here's someone who will be cheerful and chattery about things that he, Valjean, does not really know or care about. I still don't know if they'd connect on any deeper level but I could buy Valjean actively noticing and enjoying Joly's company.

Grantaire: HAAAAAHahahahhahaAAAAAHHHAHAHAHAHAH *runs out of breath* HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA HAAAAAA hahahaha nooooo. No. Nooooooooo. Grantaire talking to Valjean would go about like Grantaire talking to Javert in the I Mis Miniseries. Grantaire will talk! You cannot stop him unless you are named Enjolras! Valjean will nooooot care.

...Writing this up has made me reflect on what I think Valjean really needs out of a potential friend and it's - someone to do the talking - shared interests, or new interests they can be enthusiastic about while he nods ahead - a willingness/ ability to get HIM to talk at least sometimes ?? maybe?? - shared goth vibes or at least the ability to understand that sometimes u__u you just gotta be in a coffin now u__u - ABSOLUTELY MANDATORY overt disdain for The Rules this is why Fauchelevent was SO good for him but I think he also needs someone who is not in life debt to him! he needs to know he can socialize with Kind New People and Not Explode!!

....and this is a long post so I'm gonna save more Valjean rant :D I am pretty sure you and I will discuss later anyway!! Thank you for the random question!

[dolphin1812]

The porter’s murder is terrifying and graphic; he couldn’t see what was happening, and Hugo tells us how the bullet passed through him. The barricade now has an element of horror that can’t be forgotten.

I shouldn’t have used the word “terrifying” for Le Cabuc’s act, because Enjolras is terrifying, too. He just forces this man down! And he kills him so calmly! This what “capable of being terrible” really means – he’s caring to his friends and loves the people, but he’s willing to do dark things for his cause, and he’s resolute in doing so (and he even says “terrible” to describe his actions in some translations!).

When Enjolras told Grantaire to leave because he was “dishonoring” the barricade, he was operating the same way he is here. Le Cabuc sullied the barricade’s integrity with murder, so he was executed. But Enjolras condemns himself as executioner, too, because he believes violence is abhorrent (“Death, I make use of thee, but I abhor thee”). His act is just in his eyes, yes, but it’s just in an “old” order that yields to “necessity.” He wants none of that to exist! And so he thinks he must die, too, because now he is tainted by the violence of the old world. His speech is moving, but it’s tragic. The hopeful side is one he excludes himself from entirely. 

Combeferre is the first to say he’ll join him, which is moving for two reasons. One (and most generally), it’s a sign of how much they care about each other. Enjolras hadn’t said what his fate would be, but Combeferre offers to share it immediately, regardless of how bad it is! Secondly, Enjolras’ view of justice here has likely been influenced by Combeferre: “the good must be innocent,” and Enjolras can’t see himself as “innocent” after what he did. Therefore, he is no longer “good,” and cannot see himself in that perfect world. And Combeferre isn’t the only influence! He says “the human race,” not “France,” suggesting that Feuilly’s broader perspective may have gotten to him. But Combeferre’s influence is the one that condemns him.

This may sound like a critique of Combeferre (that sort of life-long punishment wasn’t his intention – it resembles the prison system), but it’s also important to keep in mind that while these are beloved characters to us, they’re also symbols. To those who despised protests for being messy and violent, what could be more appealing than someone who rejects that aspect so entirely that he disciplines the barricade and condemns himself for what he’s done? It’s difficult to say the barricade is full of “troublemakers” in the face of Enjolras’ principles, and it encourages those who simply want peace to sympathize with him (a revolutionary) most of all. 

And Le Cabuc was probably Claquesous! It would make sense with how he was a stranger to those who supposedly knew him, maintaining his air of mystery. And it means there really were a lot of police spies, with two known (possible) ones at just one barricade! Claquesous’ violence may have even been intentional if he was there as a spy, trying to turn the people against the barricade by making it needlessly violent.

[thebrickinbrick]

End of the Verses of Jean Prouvaire

All flocked around Marius. Courfeyrac flung himself on his neck.

“Here you are!”

“What luck!” said Combeferre.

“You came in opportunely!” ejaculated Bossuet.

“If it had not been for you, I should have been dead!” began Courfeyrac again.

“If it had not been for you, I should have been gobbled up!” added Gavroche.

Marius asked:—

“Where is the chief?”

“You are he!” said Enjolras.

Marius had had a furnace in his brain all day long; now it was a whirlwind. This whirlwind which was within him, produced on him the effect of being outside of him and of bearing him away. It seemed to him that he was already at an immense distance from life. His two luminous months of joy and love, ending abruptly at that frightful precipice, Cosette lost to him, that barricade, M. Mabeuf getting himself killed for the Republic, himself the leader of the insurgents,—all these things appeared to him like a tremendous nightmare. He was obliged to make a mental effort to recall the fact that all that surrounded him was real. Marius had already seen too much of life not to know that nothing is more imminent than the impossible, and that what it is always necessary to foresee is the unforeseen. He had looked on at his own drama as a piece which one does not understand.

In the mists which enveloped his thoughts, he did not recognize Javert, who, bound to his post, had not so much as moved his head during the whole of the attack on the barricade, and who had gazed on the revolt seething around him with the resignation of a martyr and the majesty of a judge. Marius had not even seen him.

In the meanwhile, the assailants did not stir, they could be heard marching and swarming through at the end of the street but they did not venture into it, either because they were awaiting orders or because they were awaiting reinforcements before hurling themselves afresh on this impregnable redoubt. The insurgents had posted sentinels, and some of them, who were medical students, set about caring for the wounded.

They had thrown the tables out of the wine-shop, with the exception of the two tables reserved for lint and cartridges, and of the one on which lay Father Mabeuf; they had added them to the barricade, and had replaced them in the tap-room with mattresses from the bed of the widow Hucheloup and her servants. On these mattresses they had laid the wounded. As for the three poor creatures who inhabited Corinthe, no one knew what had become of them. They were finally found, however, hidden in the cellar.

A poignant emotion clouded the joy of the disencumbered barricade.

The roll was called. One of the insurgents was missing. And who was it? One of the dearest. One of the most valiant. Jean Prouvaire. He was sought among the wounded, he was not there. He was sought among the dead, he was not there. He was evidently a prisoner.

Combeferre said to Enjolras:—

“They have our friend; we have their agent. Are you set on the death of that spy?”

“Yes,” replied Enjolras; “but less so than on the life of Jean Prouvaire.”

This took place in the tap-room near Javert’s post.

“Well,” resumed Combeferre, “I am going to fasten my handkerchief to my cane, and go as a flag of truce, to offer to exchange our man for theirs.”

“Listen,” said Enjolras, laying his hand on Combeferre’s arm.

At the end of the street there was a significant clash of arms.

They heard a manly voice shout:—

“Vive la France! Long live France! Long live the future!”

They recognized the voice of Prouvaire.

A flash passed, a report rang out.

Silence fell again.

“They have killed him,” exclaimed Combeferre.

Enjolras glanced at Javert, and said to him:—

“Your friends have just shot you.”

[aromantic-enjolras]

This is a Drink With Me gift for @gay-rad-desert! You asked for Courfeyrac and Marius, and. Well. This turned out a little heavier than I was expecting it to go, but I hope you can enjoy it anyway! I love these boys, and I was happy to do something for them <3

Marius is a good Christian boy. He is 20 year old virgin, still does altar boy duties, helps at his local church every Sunday. One day, when he's playing waiter at a church event, a beautiful young man (everyone notices when a man is beautiful, right??) comes sauntering by and starts flirting outrageously.

Courfeyrac, who is a rogue and a bit of a fuckboy, was walking around with some friends when he spotted a cute boy at a church event, and decided it would be very fun to try and get a fling out of this. If it turns out badly, Bahorel is in the nearest bar, and they are definitely enough to rescue him should the boy turn out to be a homophobic straight dude.

But then, instead of either responding to his flirting or getting pissed off and defensive, the cute boy looks at him with scared eyes and says "I'm not- I don't- I don't do that" in a voice so unconvincing that Courf immediately changes directions. This boy doesn't need a fuck. He needs a friend.

Marius is very relieved when the pretty boy seems to back off. "Okay. You don't do that. Do you do friends? Because I'd love to have one of those," he says, and it should have felt condescending, but he has such a disarming smile that Marius can't do anything but say "I guess I can do that, yes."

They don't hang out that much at first: Courfeyrac swings by a few church events, being friendly (but not overly friendly) and charming, and Marius enjoys his company a lot, but he also conspicuously never attends any masses, and people are starting to talk...

So he asks Courf if he would be up for coffee, and that's how they end up going out more and more together. Nothing big, nothing flashy, always public places, but it's just the two of them, and it feels so nice??

Courfeyrac is aware that he is on very shaky ground. He likes Marius now, and he wants to push him into being more comfortable with being gay, but he knows a false step and Marius will bolt. So he never hides the fact that he likes boys, but he only does it in very casual ways: never draws attention to it, lets Marius ignore it for as long as he needs to.

When Marius starts asking tentative follow-up questions, he takes his chance. "My friends and I have a queer space. Do you want to come by? No pressure, we can go at a weird hour, just have a coffee, talk to a few people. See for yourself."

Marius says yes, and that's how they end up going to the Musain, collectively-owned, alternative queer bar/café extraordinaire, at 4pm on a Thursday.

Everything seems to be going well, until Marius starts getting heated about God, and he makes a little speech of his own. "What is better than being loved by God?" he asks. "To be free." answers Combeferre.

And look, he is terrified of Combeferre, but he also can't help but admire the little he saw from the man, and he doesn't want to back down. Something draws him to these people, to that place, and if he can only convince them, if he can help bring them back to the light.... It can't be a sin, now, can it?

Slowly, very very slowly, he starts loosening up. He gets more relaxed, he enjoys himself, and where Courf made him comfortable with the idea of being around gays by letting him get passively used to it, these people challenge him, questioning his beliefs to his face.

It all comes to a head when he slips out of his house on a Saturday night. Courf is performing at the Musain for a drag show, and he has promised he will be there to cheer him on! And he does, and Courf is wonderful, and he has had a few drinks, and when a boy asks him to dance he is just high enough on the magic of the evening (and Courf's enthusiastic thumbs-up) that he goes for it. And then the boy kisses him.

And he can feel the panic grow in his throat, because a boy is kissing him, and he likes it. He likes it way more than he ever liked kissing Cosette, who he dated for years, who was pretty and funny and he thought he was going to marry someday. And this kiss, from a random man he doesn't even know, in a gay bar, feels so much better.

Courfeyrac shoos the man away, also in a panic, because he can see Marius' thousand yard stare from the other end of the bar. But it's too late: all Marius wants is to go home.

And he tries to rationalize it: maybe Courf just rubbed off on him. Maybe all this talk of gay people has influenced him. Maybe if he stops talking to all of them, if he doesn't think about it, the feelings will go away. But then he goes back to the church, to his old friends, and he realizes talking to them is not comforting anymore. He can't tell them anything that's bothering him. And now that he knows what it feels like, the idea of kissing men doesn't seem to go away: it only seems to grow stronger.

At last he ends up calling Courf, asking him to come over while his grandfather is away, and unloads everything on him. "I can't do this, Courf. I can't. You can be- you can be brave, and be you, and have it all, but I can't. I can't be- gay".

And Courf's heart is breaking, but what can he do? So he holds his friend, and comforts him, and tells him he is loved and worthy and that he's done nothing wrong; and that if push comes to shove, his door will always be open. "For a day, for a month, for a year. Anything you need. I promise."

And so, when Marius appears at his doorstep, one duffel bag on his shoulder and one suitcase dragging behind him, and says "I have come to sleep with you", he doesn't need to ask. He just smiles a sad smile, drags Marius into a hug, and lets him in. Into his life, and into his heart. Forever.

@drinkwithme-exchange