#I loved theorizing how these once normal people came to be the monsters that they are in the game

[comfortsnow]

its getting to the point where its not even fun to complain anymore this series just pisses me off

[maximons]

All Is Lost

Summary: Zombies have taken over the world, humanity on the edge of extinction. All hope was lost. Despite that, Wanda couldn’t seem to let go of Y/n, who had fallen victim to the plague herself.

Word Count: 2,263

Genre: Angst

Requested?: No

Warnings: Graphic depictions of violence, death, cannibalism, suicide, mentions of blood. Spoilers for Ep. 5 of What If...?

A/N: I know, I know, I’m gonna get into the stuff I promised soon. But for now, the Zombies episode inspired me and this came out. If you haven’t seen the episode yet, go watch it. Its amazing and depressing. Also this is DARK guys, probably the darkest thing I’ve ever written, so...Happy Reading!

The Zombie apocalypse was always something everyone joked about, but never something that anyone could actually predict.

Everything happened so quickly, Wanda could barely keep up. It’s hard to believe that everything was so normal only two weeks ago. Now, she was locked away with Vision in an abandoned military base in New Jersey. Desperate to survive for as long as possible while Vision worked on a cure.

Some of his experiments had been a success, most notably Scott Lang who he was able to revert back from his zombified state. However, the man was now only a severed head.

Despite the success, Vision was less than optimistic. For one, Scott was one of the first infected. While the cure worked on him, the android theorized that the disease has mutated greatly since then, and it was likely impossible to cure everyone. And even if he could, the technology to do so is beyond human comprehension and therefore doesn’t exist.

Vision might have all but given up hope, but Wanda didn’t. She couldn’t. She refused to give up on you.

Wanda and you have been best friends for as long as Wanda had been an Avenger. You were already a member of the team and greeted her with an open mind and open arms, despite all she had done. You had fire powers, and while your powers weren’t identical to Wanda’s, you still offered some basic tips and tricks to keep such explosive powers at bay.

It wasn’t a surprise that she fell in love with you.

But her stupid fear had to get in the way, and when you came to confess your own feelings for her, she panicked and rejected you. You were so heartbroken, Wanda didn’t need to read your mind to know that.

And it kills her everyday knowing that that was the last interaction she had with you. The last one with you as yourself anyway.

All that remained now was the flesh hungry, blood thirsty monster that wore your, now rotting, skin.

This wasn’t you, she knows that. She looked into your mind and saw no trace of the woman you once were, the one she loved with all her heart. She couldn’t feel you, you were gone.

Despite this, Wanda couldn’t let you go. She couldn’t handle losing you entirely. She already lost almost everyone.

She managed to convince Vision to keep you in the base for testing. You were locked behind a large steel door, with only a window to see you through. But you were here, and that’s all Wanda cared about.

The cure wasn’t working for you. Your powers caused it to incinerate when it entered your system, proving it to be ineffective. Still, she refused to give up.

Vision thought it best to terminate you after the failed tests, but Wanda begged him not to. Knowing he couldn’t overpower her, and sensing his friend’s distress with anything that comes to you, he agreed. As long as Wanda had it under control.

She doubted he knew that she was luring innocent survivors into the base so you could feed on them, but she did what she had to do.

Wanda spent most of her days sitting outside of your cell. The first few days, you were ravenous. Banging on the walls and trying to burn them down, growling and screeching with the inhuman noise that took over your vocal chords, but you didn’t manage to break free. After a while, it seemed you have given up, and just sat in place. Only moving when Wanda opened the cell and let some of your ‘food’ in.

There were times where Wanda thought that maybe, just maybe, the cure was working more than they thought. You seemed to have recognized her, your facial expressions formed into ones that she had recognized and missed dearly. But that hope quickly died when she would peek into your head and still sense nothing.

“Hey, Y/n.” Wanda walked up to outside your cell and sat cross-legged like she did everyday. Your head rose, staring at her with your now glowing yellow eyes. “Still no progress on the cure, but don’t worry, I’m not giving up yet.” You offered no response, not that she expected one. “It’s hard. It’s only getting worse out there...” She sighed as she trailed off. She raised her hand to the glass, like she always did. “I’m going to figure it out...we’re gonna get you back to normal, and I’m going to tell you every day how much I love you. I miss you so much, but...we’re almost there. I can feel it...” Wanda’s voice started choking up, as tears ran down her face. “We deserve our happy ending.”

Her hand was still pressed against the glass as she finished her speech. She was about to lower it, but then something unexpected happened. You stared at her hand curiously, beginning to raise your own. Wanda watched, smile forming on her face as your arm made it’s way to the glass. 

“Wanda! Please come here, we have a situation.” You had almost pressed your hand against Wanda’s, when Vision’s voice interrupted. Your attention turned to the direction it came from and you let out a growl, clearly angry at the interruption. Wanda sighed in disappointment, but she tried not to let it take over. You still showed massive improvement, something worth reporting back to Vision. “It’s okay.” She soothed you. “I’m going to go see what he wants then I’ll be right back, okay? I know you’re hungry, I’ll get you some food too.” You didn’t offer a response as she walked off.

“Vis! I have to tell you-” Wanda began as she walked into the main room, but cut herself off at the new faces. She didn’t recognize the bald woman with the spear or the wimpy looking man in a workers uniform, but she was familiar with Peter. What surprised her most though, was Bruce Banner. A man she hasn’t seen in over three years. “What is going on?”

“I ran into them outside the premises. Apparently word has gotten out about the cure.” Vision answered before turning his attention back to the guests. “As I told you, I am afraid we cannot help you. The cure seems to be a moot point.”

“Well, what about-” Peter began, but he was interrupted by a new voice.

“For something you have no hope for, you sure don’t have a problem bringing in new test subjects.” Wanda recognized Bucky Barnes’ voice. She turned around, and her eyes widened as she saw King T’challa on his arm, struggling to stand on his one remaining leg.

Shit.

“My king! We thought you dead.” The bald woman exclaimed in relief and surprise.

“Your highness. I was not aware you were in the base.” Vision said, confused on how that got by him. It didn’t take him long to figure out why. “Wanda...”

“I’m sorry.” Wanda whispered, knowing she was caught. “The cure wasn’t working on Y/n, and in order to keep her at bay, I had to feed her.”

“So you fed her our King?” A spear was raised to her throat, threateningly.

“It was nothing personal, I promise. I have her under control and the cure is starting to work, I know it. We just need a little more time!”

“Why not just kill her? You lured innocent people to their deaths just for her when there a couple million more Zombies out there that you could use for testing. Ones that have a chance of being cured.” The whole room went quiet after Bucky said that.

“Uh oh. Shouldn’t have said that.” Wanda heard Scott say, but she was too busy glaring at Bucky. Her eyes started to go red, but before she could do anything, she noticed the spear held to her throat begin to glow red and melt. The woman dropped the spear as it began to burn her hands.

“Did it just suddenly get like, super hot?” Peter asked as he began to fan himself.

“Oh no...” Wanda trailed off. She looked up to notice the steal walls that led to your cell begin to melt. “You’ve done it now...she hasn’t eaten in days.” Before anyone could respond, the steel doors melted completely. The man in the uniform was unfortunate enough to be standing in front of it, as a strong burst of flame shot out and incinerated him on the spot. Only a second later, you flew out the door, covered in flames as you hovered above everyone.

Wanda watched in horror as you began to fight everyone. They weren’t holding up very well, and that’s when Wanda finally realized what she had done. This wasn’t you, and if you were still here, you would hate to see your body be used to attack and kill others.

“Vision! Get us out of here!” She heard Bruce yell, and Vision shot a blast towards the wall, blowing it up and letting everyone out. Wanda turned her focus back to you, you watched them starting to escape and you began to fly after them, but a red mist surrounded you before you could. You turned your head, starting to growl, but stopped when you saw it was Wanda.

“Y/n. Stop...” You tilted your head, still struggling to move as Wanda came closer. She took a chance and reached up, gently placing a hand on your face. “I am so sorry...you never deserved this...” Your face softened at the touch, beginning to show the signs of emotion that Wanda desperately held onto. However, it was clear now that it was too late.

You snapped out of it, as you managed to break free from Wanda’s hold. You opened your mouth wide, intent on biting and feeding on her, but something stopped you. You hesitated, and Wanda noticed. You settled for pushing her aside to the ground as you reignited yourself and flew out of the base.

Wanda picked herself up after a moment, intent on stopping you. She ran past Okoye’s body, charred and eaten, but she was sure there was little time until she turned. She ran faster to where you were, now facing off against Bucky. She sprinted further, about to take off and fly when she paused.

Vision was face down on the ground. She kneeled next to him, glowing red hand turning over his body, afraid of what she’ll see. Once he was turned, Wanda gasped at the sight. The mind stone was torn out of his head.

“Oh no...no, no, no...” She held his body, tears slowly building as she mourned the loss of her best friend. She had officially lost everything. “I am so sorry Vis...I’m going to make this right, I promise.”

She heard Bucky scream. She looked over to see you start to feed on him. She saw Bruce, Peter, Scott and T’challa in the distance, making their way to the jet. They were your next target.

No. Wanda wasn’t going to let that happen. It ends now.

She used her powers to propel herself forward, landing directly in your path. You growled at her yet again as she used her powers to hold you. “Y/n...please, stop.” You struggled to get out of the hold, but Wanda held on. “This isn’t you...you wouldn’t want this...I love you more than anything, and I’m so sorry...I hope one day, you’ll forgive me.” 

Wanda used her powers to grab the gun laying by Bucky’s side. She held in to your head, ready to pull the trigger...but she couldn’t. She let out a scream of frustration and dropped her hold on both you and the gun. The gun fell to the ground, but you haven’t moved.

“I can’t do it...I...I’m not strong enough...” Wanda began crying, shutting her eyes and waited for you to finish her off. She failed everyone, no one deserved death more than her. She opened her eyes when nothing came. You stood, staring at her with a tilt of your head. The yellow of your eyes dimming as you stared.

“W....Wan...” You struggled to let out, but it was enough for Wanda to hear. She cried even harder. She was right, you were almost there...but it was too late now.

You took in your surroundings as best you could, you didn’t have a lot of awareness, but you knew enough to piece everything together. You saw the influx of zombies starting to enter to base.  Everyone needed to get away. You turned back to Wanda, and you knew what you had to do. You felt the little control you had start to slip away.

You bent down and picked up the discarded gun. You shakily pointed it to your temple, the control slipping away faster and faster. “Love....you....I...sorry...” You managed to croak out. Before you could lose control completely, you pulled the trigger.

Wanda watched in horror as you shot yourself in the head. Pieces of your brain landing on her, your blood drenching her. She looked down to see your body, half your face still together, but you were gone. Truly gone.

She knelt down sobbing, as she held your body. After a moment she looked up to see the Hulk appear as the zombies began to overwhelm the base. She saw the jet take off, and she gave a weak smile. They got away. Wanda’s job was done. This is where her story ends. All was lost for her.

So when the zombies finally reached her, she didn’t fight back. Accepting her death with open arms.

Epilogue

[icharchivist]

the gbf news for summer is that The Traumatized Lesbian Is Back: For More Trauma and i both can’t stop laughing and also feel sO BAD for her

i loved her event last year but GOD.

So the thing to know is that the gbf summer events are consistently super wacky and got progressively worse in worse year after year. In the first year, you had to hunt down a God Fish. On the 6th year, flying sharks were attacking the island and you had to defend it. 

stuff like that.

Last year we got this event:

of a young woman called Meg who was super normal, like, seriously super normal esp by fantasy standards. 

All she wanted was to go to the summer paradise island Auguste for summer, hoping to meet people there to make friends because she wasn’t really popular. There she kept meeting Mari, a friend from school who was always hanging out with her various boyfriends through the years, though she would invite Meg along. Meg, meanwhile, kept hoping she too would find a prince charming of sort.

But the kicker of this event is that Meg ended up becoming the background victim to every. single. wacky things that happened in all the previous summer events. Have her be attacked by the giant fish monsters or the crabs or be electrocuted by the killer eels (and saved by Albert). Always knowing the Crew was around and being terrified of them because everytime they show up she ends up in pain.

And she met multiple members of our crew that didn’t help her feeling better. Like. she met the ghost girl, how were we supposed to prevent that from happening TwT

So for years she was getting traumatized every single summer.

She tried to avoid the island, but always found herself back to it ever summer, and she tried to avoid the horrors happening there to no avail. She stuck to Mari as she could but YEAH.

so eventually on year 5th she decided fuck it and she decided to train to become “her own prince charming”. (meeting Albert changed her bc of that. He saved her life, and she thought it was what she always wanted, a prince in shining armor saving her... but she felt nothing. And realized that she didn’t want to be saved by a prince charming - she wanted to BECOME that prince that save people)(i also find it super ironical that for once Albert ‘gay old man’ Thunderswift Lord finally was considered attractive for someone BEFORE being considered an old man, it was a lesbian that’d go “i wanna be like you” mlm/wlw solidarity).

And she came back.

And met one of the shark from the shark event who was pretty weak but could control her matter a little... so Meg had her fuse with her arm, and now can summon sharks. (also the shark is called Ursulla and she’s SO CUTE)

And she came back to Mari and did everything to protect her, and Mari meanwhile realized she wasn’t coming back to Auguste for finding boyfriends, but in the hope to see Meg again, and now that Meg had became a “a protector of sorts”, Mari just wants to spend time with Meg, and Meg mentions that all she wanted was to spend time with Mari (LESBIANS.)

(legit though this is Mari’s journal entry:

and that’s a screencap of Mari talking about Meg:

LIKE REALLY LESBIAN.)

Meanwhile, yeah.

that’s what happened to the poor girl.

On the 6th year, there was actually very few drama happening when Meg ran into the crew which was so surprising to her like. wtf do you mean??? actual holidays???? with my girlfriend??? hello??? so now she can be her gf’s prince charming <3

(bottom>up)

ANYWAY I BRING ALL OF THAT UP

because i think about poor Meg every summer, poor girl really has NO LUCK AT ALL HUH.

Well. Next event focus on her again. SHE’S BACK.

The event is called Auguste of the Dead and people are theorizing either zombie or murder mystery and i can’t stop laughing. 

this is so evil Meg will never know peace!!!

let her have vacations with her girlfriend!!! com’on!!!!

So yeah i bring it up because 1) it was legit one of my favorite event, it was so funny, 2) i adore Meg and her girlfriend Mari and i legit cannot wait to see more of them, 3) it is possible that i’ll actually read this event when it’s out so blacklist #ichablogging gbf or #ichablogging summerevent before it happens.

Meanwhile i’ll just think about our sweet lesbian having to go through hell ONCE AGAIN because the paradise island decided to have beef with her and only her.

[mythicaldemigoddess-of-deltarune]

My Feelings About Bradford Buzzard And His Grandmother

First, If No One Has Seen The Last Episode of The Final Season of Ducktales Reboot with the Last Adventure, do not read this unless you seen that episode first.

okay here goes...

My feelings on Bradford's Grandmother, I don't like her.

she is the reason Bradford became the way he is in the first place.

plus whenever Bradford tried to reason with Scrooge, he got ignored, so of

course he had to use the papyrus to make Scrooge, Della and Donald forget he was ever there. even if he did transform into a monster,

it wouldn't be because he's evil. it would be from the negative emotions and the misinterpretation people have of him, so he isn't truly a villain, if anything he is a victim and that jerk of a Finch is the root of it all.

Even if she is Scrooge's hero, but even he would need to accept that she was a insensitive woman who caused a child trauma that led him to grow-up cold and truly alone.

Yes Bradford made mistakes, but he was blinded.

He tried to keep chaos from going out of control, even if it meant doing something that would hurt a family, which he shouldn't of did and that had crossed a line.

I don't believe that Bradford was truly evil, he was just a broken soul who wanted to stop dangerous adventures and possibly save those like him from suffering the same trauma he suffered since his childhood.

No one has to agree with me, but I just feel that most villains have good in them.

And most of their trauma and suffering are caused by the good guys or the main hero/heroine.

Plus No Hero or Heroine should be above the consequences of damaging someone else's life,

Either they be another hero or villain or a neutral party.

Scrooge wasn't truly at fault for what happen to Della, but if you think about it, it was 100% Della's.

She could of not stole the ship, but she did. and it because she chose to listen to the one who told her of the surprise, she could of chose to ignore it and act surprise later, and not cause her family to end up they it did.

Scrooge didn't mean for to become lost in space, but he isn't excused for some truly heartless things he has done in the past because of his greed before he found the true greatest treasure, which is his family.

He hurt Magica, and I believe the reason why they had that fight so long ago in the series, is because she wanted to get him back for what happen to her brother.

Even if Louie made a good point, that his villains/enemies, made him a better person.

That still doesn't excuse him for purposely not helping someone who asked for help, even saying they give him anything if he help them.

The pain that Scrooge felt when he lost Della, was perhaps the same feeling that Magica felt when she lost her brother and never saw him again.

I believe that the Phantom Blot, might really be Mr Vanderquack, Bentina Beakley's son-in-law,

Who is now a widow, who lost his wife and Bentina's biological granddaughter, before Webby came along.

But the biological granddaughter could of survived, while Edna Beakley-Vanderquack did not.

the reason why Blot wants to destroy all magic and Magica,

might have to do with the fact that he lost his wife Edna and his child.

If the incident happen before Webby was born, then I think Pepper might really be Bentina's Granddaughter.

But all that is just a theory.  if the story picks up in a Darkwing Duck Reboot and reveals that the theory about Phantom Blot being Mr Vanderquack, the widow of Edna, and Pepper being his long-lost daughter is true....then I guess I would be surprised.

But yeah back to the whole Isabella Finch, she is truly not as great as everyone makes her.

She caused Bradford to become who he is, and she couldn't see the damage it would cause later in his life.

Plus I believe that there was a reason why we saw a clone of Bradford, the real Bradford might of known what would happen if he faced Scrooge, so he used that ray thing that makes someone smart or dumb,

Shot it at his clone that looked 100% like him, then sent the clone to deal with Scrooge, while the Real Bradford himself sneaked away unseen by both sides.

If that theory is true, then maybe it will show it in the reboot of Darkwing Duck.  

I hope some of you understand my view on Bradford, at first when it was revealed he was a part of FOWL, I did thought he was a villain. but after the episode that first showed that papyrus, and even showing a bit more of his past...but perhaps not all of it.

I don't view Bradford as someone who is evil, just someone who is deeply hurt and tried to do good but ended up hurting others in his quest to achieve it.

Yes he did wrong in his life, and he was blinded by his ambition that cost him in the end.

And we should try to remember, he wouldn't be that way if it wasn't for that insensitive Isabella Finch.

Once more, no one has to agree with my feelings about it. but I still find that Finch is my least favorite character in the Ducktales 2017 Continuum.

one of the tags for this is “True Monster” and to me,

Isabella Finch was the true monster.

Bradford was her victim, and she couldn’t see that her adventures that she dragged him on, was making him unhappy and would place stress, trauma and fear in his life, and making him go down a dark path just to keep the whole world safe.

Bradford wasn’t even truly evil, just broken and emotionally hurt.

which Della, Beakley, Scrooge and the rest of the family and friends couldn’t open their hearts and eyes enough to see.

it is possible the only one who could see it, was Magica.

because the way she said that he wasn’t a villain.

I can’t agree with the actions of those who are suppose to be “Good”

but end up hurting those who are just hurt themselves.

Discord didn’t even get a proper punishment,

he, Celestia and Luna just made the three scapegoats of his actions, get turned to stone, and Star Butterfly despite the fact that her and her family have misused magic for who knows how long of generations,

she chooses to move the blame from her Mother,

to magic itself, who let me remind you everyone, is not truly at fault, but those like Star and her family who wield it.

and if you misuse that power, it is your fault, not the source of the realm your magic comes from.

at least Lena was able to do better than what Star did, I still love SVTFOE

(and still hope to get a complete dvd collection of SVTFOE someday.) 

and the last episode was still good, but I can’t agree with placing blame on magic, when it was Moon who misused it and caused so many lives to be in danger, and even ended up with Quirky dying.

Steven Quartz Universe, he went through trauma in his life that caused him to end up the way he turned out in Steven Universe Future.

I for one, love both the first series, the movie and Steven Universe Future.

the Steven Universe Future brought out some truth of Steven, that some can relate to and understand but maybe not fully.

because of what was revealed in Steven Universe Future,

about Greg’s past, I see him as both a Good and yet Bad person.

same with how Rose was during her life, as both when she was Pink Diamond,

and then when she reformed as “Rose Quartz”, which I still think that would make her a Trans-Gem, like gems who are normally be made one way, might feel like they are either a Rose Quartz, a Ruby or even a Zircon.

but the episode where we learn a bit more of Greg’s past, like how he felt about his parents and how he viewed their rules and how it seem like a prison to him.

but he might of only seen what he wanted to see, he might not of got the full picture growing up, and I had theorized that one of his parents could of been sensitive to loud music/sound, it is possible that Greg couldn’t understand.

Steven had a right to be mad at Greg, and even disappointed in him too.

Greg had cheered him up, and even made him happy finding out about his father’s old home.

but Greg made his son go back down to his lows again.

it was good that it was revealed that Steven is getting the help he needs.

when he corrupted himself, it was good that no one tried to hurt him

but hugged him when he needed that emotional support.

the kind that shows that those who are his family and friends, are there for him and are sorry they couldn’t see how much pain he was going through.

at times when a character who is normally a villain, and shows no sign of goodness in them (unlike Chrysalis, Cozy Glow and  Tirek showed when they bonded in one episode....who had shown a side of good that was in them.)

they can’t be saved...

I wont force others to agree on my view on all this, just try to respect that is how I see it.

not all villains are evil, some end up being Anti-Villains,

just as how some heroes who aren’t always good, end up as Anti-Heroes.

 even if Isabella Finch was long gone in the world of Ducktales 2017,

but to me she was the root of Bradford’s suffering and trauma.

and that makes her the woman behind the man, and the true villain.    

 now I am gonna just go and sign off and have me time.

I might sign back on later or tomorrow, it depends.

and I really hope some of you will understand how I view Bradford,

yes at first I thought of him as a villain after it turned out he was FOWL.

but then after seeing the other sides of him, I can’t help but understand he was misunderstood and he only wanted to protect the world from danger.

(he just ended up going about it the wrong way, and went too far in the wrong ways to achieve that peace.)

and his grandmother Isabella, Ludwig, Scrooge, everyone, including the rest of FOWL, couldn’t see that.

I hope that at least such a thing gets resolved in a darkwing duck reboot.

and the Bradford we saw in the very end, turned out to be one of his clones.

because I believe that Bradford deserved better, he was not born that way, he was made that way because of his so called grandmother, who couldn’t see that she was making him unhappy and causing him trauma.

well thanks for listening, and once again no one has to agree about my feeling about Bradford or Isabella Finch,

or the whole theory about Phantom Blot being Bentina’s son-in-law,

who she thought died along with her daughter and granddaughter....

well the granddaughter she had before taking Webby in.

see ya later and keep safe everybody.                                      

[growing-past-me]

Steven Universe: Where does the corruption theory fit in with the eye foreshadowing?

We all know and love the corruption theory. If you’re not familiar with it, check out this post here that explains it in depth.

But one thing many people have been questioning is how would Steven even corrupt in the first place?

Let’s take a dive into that.

What first had me thinking about this theory was the Steven doll we see in “A Very Special Episode.” Most people in the community are familiar with the increasing number of times that it has been referenced that Steven will either lose or gain a pink eye, but this one was a little too on the nose for many fans, including myself.

Let’s take a look at that doll, shall we?

There are many things unnerving about this stuffed animal, from the sewed shut mouth to the exposed chest, this thing’s just creepy! But it also made me think about McBear Bear, a device once used to explain corruption. To quote Garnet, “ It's sort of like if MC Bear-Bear didn't tear the fabric of his arm, but the fabric of his mind. “ So, one could assume that the stuffed animal is linked to corruption. But does that mean the eye is linked to corruption as well? 

How would Steven’s eye even turn pink?

Well, believe it or not, it’s already happened.

Of course, both of Steven’s eyes are pink here, not one. But, it does instantly make a connection to this reoccurring pink eye theme we see with Steven.

So, what does this all mean?

Well, I think it has something to do with Bluebird. Bare with me here. The inclusion of her in this limited series was a very strange choice, seeing as there are clearly more evils we could be focusing on other than this harmless fusion that was instantly defeated.

So why did they include her?

To show us once again that fusions cannot be built on hate without unfusing.

Steven is a character with some extreme self loathing. I mean, it’s what even allowed him to fuse with Amethyst in the first place. It was even commented on again by Sunstone in the most recent episode, coincidentally the same one where the doll came from. 

“Don’t be a Steven, amirite?”

But, unlike most fusions, Steven needs both of his halves for the other one to exist. So, would they even be able to unfuse physically without removing Steven’s gem? I personally don’t think so. 

So how does a fusion in extreme emotional distress, that is unable to unfuse, stay together?

We’ve seen this before as well.

I’d like to remind you that the fusion experiments had to try multiple times before finally being able to create a form. While this is most likely due to the fact it is composed of gem shards, I wouldn’t say it discounts the theory either. The gem experiments also prove that the crewniverse is not afraid to go where I theorize they might.

We also see this again with corruption, a gem tries to take it’s normal form when poofed, but is unable to. 

So, to recap, there is a LOT of foreshadowing about something to do with Steven’s eye turning pink. It becomes increasingly more obvious when we see this stuffed Steven animal. Stuffed animals have been used before in an important role when explaining corruption, thus creating a link between the two. Pink Steven shows us a time when Steven would be able to have pink eyes in the first place, thus it’s logical to make the assumption he is connected to the pink eye. 

Steven is also a fusion, one that is full of hate for itself and under any other circumstance, would likely have already unfused. But seeing as these two sides are bound to each other, this is physically impossible. Gems with extreme mental states have been seen to corrupt/change forms under these circumstances. 

So, how do I think it’ll go down?

 Steven’s attempts to distance himself from his gem half/past eventually actually come to a head as Pink Steven, forces himself to be heard. His “pink episodes” become more frequent, and eventually, parts of his body start to even stay pink. Steven continues to ignore his gem’s half’s cry for help (Perhaps a reference to the closed shut mouth.) Making Steven even more emotionally unstable, and thus his form. With his body now actively trying to unfuse, it doesn’t take long for his form to fall apart by the seams, (much like the doll again) resulting in a monster.

But that’s just my take on it.

[tanukyclaws]

@keysstylus​ alright, sorry in advance that this isn’t that much, it’s what I found in an hour. I could find more but I’d have to go through a lot of posts, since some were instagram stories that I cant search for anymore. And keep in mind this is only recent stuff and stuff you can find easily, there’s lots of things like this. Maybe I’ll search more today, but you can also ask around, there’s lots of instances where they post a bee emoji or tease the bees before a volume/episode.

But aight. You see this? It was a popular post, do you know why it happens? It’s not just crazy fans taking things out of context. Surely some of those are a reach but people in this fandom reach for a reason. I’m pretty sure the heart is from one of Arryn’s insta story. One reply or tweet on its own doesn’t hurt. But when they keep adding bees into it you just can’t help but ‘piece things together’.

Gonna put this one under a read more cause it’s lengthy.

This is to show that they know what the bee means and use it when they refer to the ship. I think this was for chapter 12 when they reunited. When she does this or she retweets fanart that’s alright. And imo sometimes Arryn can do it unintentionally, but not all the time.

And here’s an example of how people will predict and theorize just off a tweet of theirs. Sometimes they do things like this where they accidentaly reveal that something will happen during the volume. But you never know when, what and if it will happen. Just like the picture I’m gonna discuss next. But now it happened, our theories came true, Blake did scream after Yang. And this gives you hope that next time they tweet about the bees it must be true and the bees will become canon, but they dont.

Here’s another example on how big of an influence they have on the rwby fandom, and why this harms the fandom. Before v7 aired Arryn tweeted this, fans had theories about all kinds of crazy stuff including an Atlas Ball. We all knew it was just that: a theory, but when Arryn posted this we all thought there would be some dancing this volume, and everyone was crazy about the Atlas Ball, and then disappointed it didn’t happen. But that’s the thing, we got NO hints whatsoever in show that it would happen, it was a theory and ALL fandoms have those, but when someone directly working for the show fuels into it it becomes a bit more than a theory. And once it doesn’t happen it disappoints you. Not only did we not get an Atlas Ball, but also the Yang and Blake party scene with FNKI. 

Teasing the ship. It’s clear that Arryn insinuates she would cosplay Blake so they both could do a couple cosplay, except that in show they’re not a couple. Intentional or not this teases the ship and brings in more views. Fans trust those 2 so much, if they tease it like that then ofc it’s happening. Except it doesn’t, it just stagnates.

Stuff like this is honestly what makes me think they’re onti it too. It’s CLEAR that they’re using bumbleby here for views, it’s clear that they’re teasing it. They’re talking about bumbleby but nothing gets confirmed, not in show or outside. What’s the point? Do they talk about renora? Or any straight ship for the matter? They know how big bumbleby is and how many bumbleby fans are in the fandom, I don’t think this is a coincidence. Renora is a popular ship as well, why aren’t they doing this with it? Why isn’t Neath teasing it the same way those 2 do?

Here’s the v4 example I’m talking about. She knows that being a fan will only burn her. She did it before, she knows how important her words are to the fandom and how people will reach for anything. As I said, she’s been here before and she knwos what she’s doing

I hope I can find some other stuff and show you. There’s lots of tweets of just a bee emoji, or them hyping up the next episode and dropping a hint about the bees (like again a bee emoji, once she posted a gif with a canon firing, a yellow heart etc.) and I don’t think that’s unintentional. I’m not saying they’re crueless monsters, but they’re not exactly your best friends either. After all some things they do harm (and did harm in the past as well) the bumbleby fandom, they set up exceptations and hype up things that never happen. And it’s not just them. Remember VRV? The valentine’s cards? Remember the merch, the tshirts with blake and yang? Why so much hype, why doesn’t renora (who even kissed and confessed!) get as much hype?

Sorry but I refuse to believe they, and all those people from RT, VRV and everything else, just love it so much and are excited about it. I refuse to believe that the ship that gets the most hype, tease and hints with little to no development/no confession/no kiss/no nothing is the LGBT ship while the straight canon ship that lots of people love doesn’t get shit. Is it simply just a coincidence? Again, they know that they can’t interact like they’re normal fans. Why do they do it. They’re the only ones who do it. Neath doesn’t do it, or Lindsay, or anyone else.

But they do it, and considering how much RT and VRV teased the ship I don’t think it’s entirely just them being excited about the ship. Sure a part is like that, Arryn at least loves the ship and it’s clear, but what a coincidence that only the wlw ship gets teased and only the voice actresses of the wlw ship that’s not canon yet hint it so much while the other voice actors of already canon ships didn’t ever say shit about their ship, RT didn’t ever say or hint or tease it either.

Is it really just a coincidence? Can’t they simply just retweet fanart and stop teasing the ship with tweets and instagram posts and all kinds of hints? I never said they’re monsters or evil, I just said they don’t give any fucks about us. And considering all this shit and how it happened in the past it wouldn’t be impossible to believe. The bumbleby fandom is like this because of them solely. Their disappointment? It’s because the voice actresses teased the ship too much and set up some standards/ideas that never happened. The crazy theories? Every fandom has them, but not to the level of the bee fandom, because the VAs feed into them. I’ve literally watched She-Ra, LoK, Owl House and many more and I never met a fandom that kept posting and begging before every single episode “bees will kiss this ep” but then when it clearly doesn’t happen say “it’s alright them sharing a glance was much more intimate I’m glad they didn’t kiss it would’ve been rushed”

And this happens for a reason. Just think about it, think about how much the VAs of the only relevant LGBT ship interact with us (and only they, no any other VAs), how much RT teases it, alongside other companies, how much merch they have in comparasion to other ships/characters, and how much hype it has for something that stagnated for 2 volumes now. It’s hard to believe it’s just a coincidence and that they’re not, at least sometimes, doing it intentionally.

[olivia200312]

Meeting Again~ Ratchet x Alister's Daughter! Lombax! Reader

Requested by the lovely @Teaganlombax: "How about Ratchet x Alister's daughter! Reader?"

This is Lombax reader obviously. Don't forget to choose what the reader is in requests. It makes the authors hard what to choose. -_-

Warning: I never played Crack In Time but I do saw the clips where Ratchet met Alister and the final battle.

Note: the pic goes to Insomniac Games!

--------------------------------------------

There was a beautiful young 18-year-old Lombax named Y/N Azimuth. That's right. She's Alister's daughter. She looked a lot like her dad except she had H/C hair and E/C eyes. Her father was a Four-Bolt Magistrate of the Lombax Praetorian Guard and an elder councilman for the Center for Advanced Lombax Research. The General lived once in Fastoon, the home planet of the Lombaxes. He was Kaden's best friend, who was Ratchet's father. But did you know that Y/N and Ratchet met each other as babies? Y/N was only born a week later so Ratchet was the oldest. Both Kaden and Alister were so happy when their kids were born.

Life was pretty normal until Taychon appeared with his big fat ass lies. He started to brainwash the Lombaxes with his plans. Kaden was the only that didn't trust that evil Cragmite. He warned Alister to not trust him, but the General didn't listen. And thanks to that, Alister made a huge mistake...

Kaden punched Alister in the face and was so angry at him. Taychon attacked the Lombaxes with his army. No one saw it coming. Many Lombaxes tried to hide, escape, and help others. Many were not so lucky and got killed. Lombaxes got their hands on the Dimensionator and escaped through the portal. They were in a Lombax Dimension. Kaden helped other Lombaxes to escape while his wife hid Ratchet. Once Kaden came back to get his wife and son, he relizead that she's gone. So Kaden went to get his son. Luckily, he managed to send his son to Solana Galaxy. Kaden was soon killed after that by Taychon. If you're wondering what happened to Alister, he took his daughter with him. His wife was killed. Alister flew to planet Torren IV that was located in Polaris Galaxy just like Fastoon. Alister at least found a place to live with his daughter. He trained her and watched her grow up.

That was years ago. Y/N was 18 now and does her best to help her father. She even wanted to impress him that she's strong and smart. She was busy cleaning her room while her father went off to check something. He told Y/N that he saw something so he went to check.

"Dear, can you come out, please? I have someone to introduce to you," It was Alister.

Someone, to introduce? That barely ever happened. That caught Y/N be surprised. She wasn't gonna lie. It was boring without having visitors. It would've been nice if she and Alister had some time to time.

Y/N came out and walked towards her dad and an... Lombax! A male Lombax around her age! Y/N's eyes grew wide in shock and in surprise. She saw that the Lombax had the same expression. But what was more shocking was that the new Lombax blushed. He couldn't help but find Y/N beautiful. Y/N was blushing too.

"Dear, meet Ratchet. Ratchet, meet my daughter, Y/N."

Ratchet and Y/N both shook hands while giving each other shy smiles. Alister couldn't help but chuckle. Once the greeting was over, Alister started to explain about Kaden, that Ratchet and Y/N met each other when they were babies and other stuff. Alister even gave his amulet to Ratchet so that he can see the pic of his father.

"I have so many questions. How do you know him?" Ratchet asked.

"Kaden and I were good friends. He was a great Lombax. Smart as they come. He was the first outsider to theorize that the Great Clock even existed."

Y/N was amazed by what she heard from her father. So Kaden was the first outsider to theorize that the Great Clock even existed? That's super cool!

"And this 'clock,' you think Clank's in there?"

Y/N looked at Ratchet. "Who's Clank?"

Ratchet looked at her and couldn't help but blush again. He then explained who Clank was and what happened to him. Y/N couldn't help but feel sorry. "I'm sorry to hear that."

Ratchet gave her a small smile that it was ok. It wasn't her fault after all.

Once Alister spoke, the two Lombaxes turned to Alister. "Clock is a rather crude translation of the runes on Quantos. Specifically, they say 'Keeper of time.' But, yes, I suspect he is." By that time, Alister was at a big chest and opened. "You see, according to Fongoid lore, the Zoni are the guardians of time. If your friend is connected to them, he must play some part in its operation." Alister then looked through the big chest. "Now, where are those blasted things?"

Ratchet was now looking at some papers that were hanging. So Zoni's took Clank? Ratchet was wondering what Clank was playing some parts. That's when he realized something. "Wait, I thought my father was the only one to stay behind when the Lombaxes left. Why didn't you go with them?" He was now facing Alister.

"Sometimes the universe has a cruel sense of humor," Alister said. What did he mean by that? Then the white Lombax found something that he had been looking for. "Ah! Here they are. Your father's Hoverboots. Ready for your first lesson?" He showed Kaden's Hoverboots to Ratchet.

Ratchet nodded with a smile.

"My daughter tested it out once. She's good at it."

Ratchet then looked amazed at Y/N, who blushed a bit.

Skip where the final battle holds~

"So, I can't talk you out of this, can I?" Ratchet asked. He was sad.

"Ratchet, we have been on many adventures, but the clock needs someone to protect it. It is what I was built for," Clank said and stuck his metal hand out to his best friend.

Ratchet then kneeled down and pulled Clank in a hug. Clank was shocked but accepted the hug. They both were best friends that never left each other. It was pretty sad, hard, and difficult when you had to leave your best friend for a good reason. Clank wanted to protect the clock.

Y/N smiled sadly at the scene. Even though when she never had a best friend, because she was only a baby when Fastoon got attacked, she knew that it was hard for Ratchet and Clank.

However, Alister was different. "Wait, so that's it? What about the Lombaxes?"

"They're not in danger. They've just moved on. And we'll find them. But the past stays where it is. Come on, pal. I'll walk you." He then looked at Y/N. "Wanna come?"

Y/N smiled. "Sure." She then went with Ratchet and Clank.

"You were never a sidekick. You know that, right?" Ratchet said.

"I always thought that you were the sidekick," Clank joked.

Y/N couldn't help but laugh. Ratchet and Clank joined too in the laughter. But the white Lombax behind was suddenly angry.

"Where are you going? This is your responsibility. You can't just walk away! The Lombaxes need us! Don't walk away from me! I said stop!" Then Alister shot his electricity towards Ratchet and it hit his chest! Y/N and Clank stopped in their tracks, shocked. Ratchet felt weak while holding his chest. Just as Y/N and Clank reached for Ratchet, it was... too late. He fell.

"Ratchet!" Y/N and Clank shouted. They both turned around to face Alister, but he wasn't happy. At all. How could he do this?! Y/N just met Ratchet again after so many years and now that?! Her father turned into a monster! He killed the hero that so many people knew! That's when Alister shot his weapon again towards Clank, who quickly moved out of the way.

Y/N and Clank looked at each other and nodded. They need to control the clock to set 6 minutes earlier to save Ratchet. Without him, they can't save the world.

Once Clank managed to turn the clock 6 minutes early, it was set in stop-motion. They saw Ratchet's shocking expression while the electric from Alister was close to him. Clank and Y/N looked at each other and nodded. Y/N ran at Ratchet and pinned him down just in time. The electric missed him.

Ratchet blushed bright red that Y/N was on top of him. Once both of them were up, they looked at Alister, who had an angry expression. Ratchet was shocked and serious. He knew that it was time to stop the General before it was too late, because if Alister managed to activate the clock, then the whole universe would die! It was a bomb! A trap!

Skip~

Ratchet, Y/N, and Clank managed to win against Alister. Y/N was sad that she fought against her own father, but she had no choice! Clank clearly said that they couldn't let him touch the lever.

Alister fell on his knees and arms defeated while Ratchet ran towards the lever, and tried to stop. The lever was big so Ratchet needed to use his whole power.

"No! What are you doing?!" Alister asked in an angry tone.

"Come on!" Ratchet said as he broke the lever.

"It's not working. Why isn't it working?!" Alister didn't understand.

"Because it's not a time machine, Alister! The clock isn't meant to alter time! Only keep it!" Ratchet answered angrily, hoping that he would finally understand.

"Thirty seconds until total system failure."

Alister had a guilty expression on his face, while Y/N and Ratchet tried to go further, but they were shot back.

"I'm so sorry," Alister said.

Ratchet and Y/N were about to try again, but Alister came to them, stopping them. "No. Let me."

Wait, what was he planning?

"What are you going to do?"

Once Alister arrived at his spot, he turned to look at Y/N with a sad and proud smile. "I'm proud of you, my daughter." He then looked towards Ratchet. "Take care of yourself, Ratchet. Please, take care of my daughter."

Y/N had tears in her eyes. Her father was going to sacrifice his life in order to stop the clock. Y/N watched how her dad used his weapon to replace the lever and started to push. Once Alister managed to push it fully, Ratchet quickly grabbed Y/N and ran together with Clank. Everything went black...

Once Ratchet and Clank were awake, it was silence. Was it over? There were only ticking sounds of the clock. Ratchet and Clank both stood up and look behind them. They were in shock once the saw Y/N crying silently, holding Alister Azimuth, who was now dead, on her lap. Her ears were dropped into sadness.

Ratchet felt sadness through his heart. He lost someone who knew about his father. Not only that, but Y/N lost her father as well, by sacrificing himself.

Ratchet walked towards Y/N. "Y/N?"

Y/N looked up with tears in her eyes. "He's gone..."

Ratchet looked with sadness. He was about to comfort Y/N, until he saw the amulet open, showing the photo of Alister and Kaden. Ratchet kneeled down and picked it up.

"He did a brave thing, Y/N, Ratchet. You both should be proud of him," Clank said.

"I-I am." That's only what Y/N said. She was proud of her father, but she wasn't ready to lose him. But if Alister didn't do that, then the universe could've been dead for good. She lost her mother while Fastoon got attacked, then years later, her father was now dead too. Alister was for sure with Y/N's mother now, both watching over their daughter and Ratchet, together with Ratchet's family.

Everyone was silent, not knowing what to say since Alister was gone...

When everyone came back to their sentence, they all took ready to go back home, now that the universe was rescued once again. Y/N took her father's weapon with her, in order to feel connected to him. Ratchet kept the amulet since Y/N had another one. They buried Alister somewhere peaceful and they all went back home. Ratchet let Y/N live with him since she had nowhere else to go. She visited her father's grave almost every day. Ratchet and Y/N started dating soon after, making their parents proud and happy.

It was sad to write this one. Sorry that it took so long. I got another request so hopefully, soon I can update fast. I'm planning to write one-shots of Kaden and Alister soon enough so stay tuned!

[mrfunnybone]

Sans The Skeleton

An overview of Sans life, from childhood to elder years. 

“i was a lil’ shit.” — Clever boy with bright eyes.

Once a rambunctious child, Sans had always been a bit too clever for his own good and has often gotten himself in trouble as a result. His days were spent creating complex pranks to fill his time and sneaking around where he didn’t belong. He’s a surface born monster, born to a small village. Sans has both Skeleton and Nightwalker monster genetics and belongs to the Osteo family. His father, a doctor in human and monster biology, provided most of his early education.

He was still a boy when the war between monsters and humans ended, with monsters on the losing side. Sans father fled, without his sons, before the human soldiers could capture him. He most likely died along with other monsters who attempted an early escape. Sans, his baby brother Papyrus, and the other monsters were rounded up and led to what would become their prison. The brothers were largely raised by Mr. Muroidea, a Rat Monster who was the human equivalent of a clergy man. He passed away about 5 years after Monsterkind was imprisoned due to illness.  

By that time, Sans was old enough to accept full responsibility for himself and Papyrus, and continued raising him while completing his education underground. 

***

“are you aware that we’re making history?” — Dr. Osteo, Royal Assistant.

After completing his Underground Doctorate, Sans thesis on Quantum Mechanics, titled Interpreting Quantum Mechanics in Terms of Random Discontinuous Motion of Particles, earned him recognition in the scientific community. His previous externship for the Royal Laboratories led to numerous projects that garnered more attention toward his potential. Despite his relative youth and inexperience, Sans work and innovation earned him the position of Assistant to The Royal Scientist, Dr. Wingdings Gaster.

He was meant to eventually follow the Doctor in his footsteps as his protege. The duo known as Dr. Gaster and Dr. Osteo quickly became a team known for abolishing the impossible and making strides against insurmountable odds. Their professional relationship developed into a friendship over the years, bound by common goals and a relatable troubles.  

Their team and their friendship began to fall apart with the introduction of DETERMINATION, pulled from fallen humans who found themselves among Monsterkind’s prison-hold. The CORE, which provided power for all of the Underground, became an unstable force that even Undergrounds Royal Scientists couldn’t conquer. Desperate measures were taken. Dr. Gaster and Dr. Osteo began to disagree on which line should remain uncrossed, and in the end, such a line divided their scientific partnership indefinitely.

*** “our reports showed a massive anomaly in the timespace continuum. timelines jumping left and right, stopping and starting...until suddenly, everything ends.” — The Fall.

Dr. Gaster became wiped from time, space, and memory, creating a fractured timeline. This left random holes of missing information in its wake, including the identity of Gaster and those who worked alongside him.

Due to the circumstances in which it happened, Sans retained memories of the previous unfractured timeline. He tried to retrieve Dr. Gaster and the other team members from what he coined The Void, including attempts of bringing theoretical time travel to fruition, but never showed complete success. Sans has multiple theories on The Void, what it is, where it is, and how his lost teammates are able to maintain a semblance of cognitive reasoning within it.

Early in his research, Sans discovered the possibility of communication between their plane and The Void, but soon found that the communication held little value. While seemingly aware, the monsters ability to convey information clearly was deteriorated. Sans theorizes that their mental capabilities are not whole within The Void, strewn apart like unraveled yarn dolls, leaving them with little more than mad ramblings.

Some time after the timelines fragmentation, The Royal Laboratory found reports of anomalies in the timespace continuum. Sans continued to monitor these reports as he researched The Void under the impression that they could be related. Eventually, he was able to pinpoint that a single living anomaly was the cause of the timelines erratic behavior.

Sans at first theorized that the anomaly (Flowey) was simply unhappy, and would stop toying with timelines if they could find companionship. Once the timespace continuum was stabilized, he hoped to breech The Void and restore the original timeline. After countless attempts of befriending and reaching a “happy ending”, as Sans dubbed it, this theory proved false. The anomaly continued to Reset regardless of its emotional state until a new anomaly (The Human) came along and appeared to usurp its power.  

***

“i gave up trying to go back a long time ago.” — From Dr. Osteo to Mr. Funnybone.

With all efforts proven meaningless and all theories at a dead end, Sans essentially gave up trying to stop the Resets from occurring or extracting his teammates from The Void. He attempted to live a normal life despite what he knew. For a short time, he found escapism in comedy, dubbing himself “Mr. Funnybone” and taking comfort in the laughter of his fellow monsterkind. If they were going down, at least it would be after a good time.

The positive spin was difficult to maintain. Sans continued searching new methods of mental escape as old ways became numb. Eventually, however, every pleasure lost its luster and every comfort became dull. Occasionally he found himself drawn back to his lab and reports, but found no hidden answers among the dust.

Sans accepted existential nihilism as the only explanation for life and its absurdities. With this belief, he found it difficult to justify effort and goals, and spent some time unemployed while his savings dwindled away. He slept, he ate, he existed only by definition.

It was by push of his younger brother, Papyrus, that Sans bothered to take up another job. Sentry Duty is little more than booth babysitting, but the one tiny step sparked something in Sans that led to a reemergence of motivation. Long term goals were meaningless, he decided, but short term gratification could still have merit. He could still earn money to keep him and his brother in comfort. He could still partake in the simple pleasures of life, such as good food and good laughs.    

Sans is aware that the time-space continuum will only take so much, and eventually, the fractures will destroy everything. He tries to simply enjoy the time that he has with the people he cares about, and maybe, one day, an answer to the timelines instability will appear. In the meantime, he just tries to keep everything from ending permanently— because hey, a slim chance is better than none, right?

*** “that, my friend, is called the sun.” — Freedom.

The timelines will never be returned to their original state, but the fragments are filled and anomaly's power is no more. With time, Sans begins to adjust to consistent timeline once more, free of Resets and impending doom (for now.)

Eventually, Sans revisits his abandoned goal of opening The Void. After much effort, he is finally, finally successful. With this, the final piece of the timeline is restored. Dr. Gaster, thanks in part to his injection of DETERMINATION, is able to survive the process of returning to their plane. Their teammates are not so fortunate. They leave their entrapment, but do not survive beyond The Voids hold.

There is no immediate mend to the broken friendship of Dr. Gaster and the previous Dr. Osteo. There is no immediate shift from Sans nihilistic tendency. He is aware, far more than the average mind is perhaps aware, that life as we know it is fleeting. The Timeline Fracture was only one of many possible interruptions on what many believe is guaranteed life. There is, Sans knows, no guarantee of anything.

As a result of his exposure to fractured timelines and resets, Sans short-term memory is deteriorating. While he is in his 30′s, it is hardly noticeable and has no impact on his daily life. When he is an elder, he will suffer fractions of short and long-term memory loss.

In rare moments, he will forget that he is no longer Dr. Osteo, and that his laboratory has long since been boarded up. He will forget that he is no longer Mr. Funnybone with an audience to attend to. He is only Sans. Sans, the skeleton. He loves his little brother and a well made burger. He enjoys trading jokes with a former Queen. He takes the anomaly to school on Wednesdays.

While his memories may be fading, Sans does not suppose that it is such a sad thing to forget once and awhile. After all, he still has some good food, some bad laughs, and some nice friends.

[arreisstorm]

BTS' Map Of The Soul: Persona

I am always in a continuous state of shock and awe whenever I even begin to contemplate the in-depth philosophical, psychological, and just overall intellect these boys possess.

Not only have they used various works of literature:

Demian- Wings

The Ones Who Walk from Omelas- Spring Day

but they have also been incorporating theoretical science:

Carl Jung's 4 major archetypes

since the very beginning!

And then to use a music industry as big as K-Pop to highlight the importance of knowledge and connect everything together...

That's beautiful.

It's genius!

So let me try and break some of it down now:

Carl Gustav Jung was a famous psychiatrist and psychotherapist who once proposed the theory that everyone's personality consisted of 4 separate entities:

The Shadow

The Anima/Animus

The Persona

The Self

and it was these 4 traits, or archetypes, that were believed to be the reasoning for why we as individuals developed personalities and certain behaviors. He also theorized that when an individual recognized and experienced all 4 archetypes that it would lead to self-fulfilment. So now let's break this down even further but from BTS' viewpoint.

The Shadow

From their debut through Dark & Wild, you can see that these were more chaotic times for BTS as they were trying to let the world know who they were, yet also trying to remain genuine at the same time. It's hard thing to do because, especially when referring to K-Pop, you are told you have to look, act, and exist in a certain way. You are to be idols and to model what's most popular when it comes to societal influence. This is exactly what Carl meant when he introduced the Shadow archetype. It's known to be the darker side of ourselves; the wildness and chaotic version that we use to try to repress some of our more negative thoughts.

BTS experienced the Shadow because they debuted with this "bad-boy" imagine and basically said F the system! Although they still had their personal beliefs and stances on life, they did kind of let themselves become manipulated by others wishes. Even some of the boys have had regrets towards the way they first acted. I mean RM, then Rap Monster, openly expressed how he wanted to change his name because he felt that title no longer applied to who he was. Same for the rest of the boys. They had just started out and were naive and some easily impressionable, no one should blame them for their early days, I mean I'm sure we all have times we look back on not too fondly as well.

The Anima/Animus

Jung believed the next step after the Shadow was the Anima/Animus, which represents the feminine (Anima) side of male's unconsciousness, while the (Animus) is the masculine side for the female's. This aspect was said to bring order or balance to an individual's life. Because we live in a society that is so concerned with separating one's gender as a way to normalize behavior as a whole, it has become almost impossible for us to have said balance because it is "not acceptable"; however, it's important to have those two separations to a person's behavior because it allows us to have positive and negative aspects for each.

Imagine if you had a man who was nothing but competitive and dominating all the time, yet lacked the nurturing skills of a women when it came to showing compassion towards a child or loved ones. Then imagine on the other hand, there's a women who has all the emotional capacity yet let's herself be pushed around and stepped on because she lacks an assertive nature due to said generosity and compassion. Neither one would be able to make it long in this world because they do not possess the balance from both sides to do so.

Relating this back to BTS, you can see the Anima appearing during the Love Yourself highlight reel, although it wasn't so clear to some until now. Most ARMY or casual supporters of BTS simply thought that these girls that appeared in the video were simply some type of love interest or previous relationship they had because including girls in idol groups' videos is nothing out of the ordinary; however, knowing about the archetype Anima/Animus, I have pieced together that these girls were actually not love interests at all, but they represented the boys' feminine part of their unconsciousness.

The reason I say this is because during the HYYH era MVs, you can see the destructive nature BTS are going through. Whether it be destruction of self or of personal relationships, it's obvious that they are still experiencing the first stage, the Shadow, and in order to move past it they must recognize the next one. The girls in the video are seen when the boys are at their happiest, AKA when they are experiencing balance from the uncertainty surrounding their lives. It is here we can see the growth of each member taking place.

(Photo credit: stussyjimin on Twitter)

The Persona

After we have the Shadow and Anima/Animus we move onto the 3rd stage: the Persona. This archetype is one of the most common ones that people find themselves unable to move past.

Societal constructs yet again have a huge part to play in this because we are constantly seeking validation from others in order to appease our own self-conscious tendencies. You see, the word 'persona' in Latin literary means 'mask', which is appropriate because when we reach this archetype we often force ourselves to wear a mask so that others might accept our perceived truths over the actual ones. Whether it be at work, home, in other public situations, or even online we all make the decisions to put on that mask, contradicting our own beliefs in order to seem likeable. These decisions don't even necessarily have to be life-changing, but any minor ones also alter an individual as a whole.

You see, where the Shadow's job is to let us repress our unacceptable behaviors to appear more relatable, the Persona highlights those new changes to keep up the charade of being accepted from what others expect from us. This could more easily be known as "people-pleasing". In order to reach our next stage the most important thing to keep in mind is that we as humans are not simply a sum of our Personas and we must find our true identity within ourselves.

Again, relating this back to BTS, it reminds me of 2 different concepts: Wings and Love Yourself: Tear.

With Wings, I mostly see it in the solos because each one specifically deals with some kind of pain or sadness due to outside influences. For example, in Jungkook's BEGIN, he mentions how helpless he felt during their debut and then how much it hurt him to see his hyungs going through dark times. In Jimin's LIE, he talks about his struggles with starvation and body imagery and how listening to negativity made him spiral out of control. V's STIGMA explains how he often feels like this absent family member to his brothers because of BTS' busy schedule and his inability to be there for them. Suga's FIRST LOVE expands on his depression and how he almost gave up his dream at one point, also turning his back on his first love which is music. RM's Reflection is almost like a conversation with himself conveying his insecurities and how hard he finds it to love himself because of how he's been perceived in the past. Hobi's MAMA, although the more happier track of them all, serves as a love letter to his mom confessing his hardships as well as how much he appreciates his mom for always having his back. Then finally we have Jin's AWAKE, where he pours his heart out about feeling inadequate compared to everyone else, yet he still is going to try his hardest. The boys showed us their personal struggles and how keeping up these charades for so long would end up tearing them apart. They knew they were missing the final link.

Love Yourself: Tear can also be seen in this way. In fact, RM explained that when writing and designing the concept for one of their most popular tracks from the album, Fake Love, he was trying to communicate the fact that, in life, we constantly find ourselves trying to fill a void in order to deem ourselves as whole, and often times this can be filled with love, but that doesn't specifically have to be about relationships. "We're saying that if you're not true to yourself, your love won't last forever. The love could be person to person, it could be between me and myself,".... "It's kinda deep."

See here he means that love doesn't necessarily have to be about a physical relationship, just like the Persona doesn't just have to be about the relationship you have with others. Even if the simplified version is often seen as "people-pleasing", it can also mean, in an inadvertent way, changing yourself or donning a mask in order to fool your own mind into loving those alterations you've made personally. Learning to love yourself and acknowledging your flaws is the only way to reach the final stage.

(Photo credit: dailyhoping on Twitter)

(YAJR#jkc at aminoapps.com)

The Self

The 4th and final stage to achieving personal fulfillment is known as the Self. This means that after having gone through all other areas of self discovery when reaching this stage there should no longer be any traces of doubts or identity loss left.

According to Jung, the Self is most often represented by the wise man/wise woman, especially when it comes to dreams. He once said that if there was a ever a time when a person dreamed of a wise figure, then it was an indication that self fulfillment is right around the corner. This is a lose interpretation though, it doesn't necessarily have to be an old man or old woman, some even think that people who serve as mentors to an individual, regardless of age, can also fit the profile. In the case of BTS however, I do believe that Jung's original idea was more of the inspiration.

If you recall during one of the trailers for Fake Love, there was the Magic Shop where the boys went to trade in objects for others. The vendor in charge of the shop could be considered as a sort of magician, which just so happens to be another character that is said to represent the Self. So knowing that and then if you see in the video that the objects traded by each boy connects them back to previous storylines, or sticking with Jung's theory, previous archetypes that can be used to remind them of hurt, pain, and darker times. The symbolism of this exchange can be interpreted as the boys relinquishing their previous lost identities to finally take that metaphorical step and receive the solution that will finally lead them to the Self.

Actually, if you look at the next MV that follows Fake Love extended version, you will see that it is the last song from BTS' latest album Love Yourself: Answer, Epiphany. The literal definition of the word 'epiphany' means a sudden realization, revelation, or insight, which in terms of the archetype, the Self, this could be a representation of the defining moment that shows BTS finding the final path to self fulfillment and true happiness. I'm not saying they've 100% reached the very top of the pyramid, but I do think that in deciding to make this the last track on the album, they are also treating the words as a personal message to all of ARMY.

This is their genius way of letting everyone know that the only true solution to achieving that final level of a well-developed Self, you must first experience a culmination of all previous archetypes and then integrate them all alongside the last:

One must learn to express hurt and emotions (the Shadow) before they can find a balance within (the Anima/Animus) to help counteract the mask and preconceptions (the Persona) others make us develop throughout life. It is only then will we be wise (the Self) enough to find the hidden truth.

Final Thoughts:

First of all, I want to say thank you if you made it through this whole post, I know its a little long and I truly appreciate it. 💜

Secondly, I want to reiterate that none of this is to be seen as a concrete answer to BTS concepts, song meanings, or their entire creative process as a whole, this is simply my thoughts and opinions and nothing more. That being said though, I am more than open and willing to hear both your theories on the symbolism BTS uses, as well as any constructive criticism you might have concerning this post. So please feel free to leave a comment ✌

Lastly, I have one more thing to touch base on and that is the recent announcement that was the inspiration behind this post being created in the first place. It's been blowing up the internet since it was first released, but in case you might have missed it, BTS has just dropped their comeback date (April 12th!) and the title is Map of the Soul: Persona.

See because I have such an interest in psychology/philosophy and especially loved studying Jung's work, when I first saw the title, and knowing how intellectual these boys are, I couldn't help myself from thinking that this new era could possibly have ties into Jung's 4 Archetypes. This then brought me to revist everything BTS has done up until now to see if I could be right, and that's when I realized they had already tackled the theory on the down low, or at least for most people; hence why I made this post, I wanted to create this in-depth analysis to help others understand the pure genius aspects that goes into BTS' concepts.

Now with that being said, if this new era and concept truly is going to draw inspiration from Carl Jung and his theories, then the above post is nothing more than a simple a taste of what's to come. Trust me, if it's BTS we are talking about, then everything I've said pales in comparison to what their truly brilliant minds can come up with. Either way I can't wait to see what's in store!!!

Thank you again if you read this and please feel free to share or leave your own comments. I would love to hear what you guys have to say! 💜💜💜

[creator-zee]

32

       I leaned casually against the stone wall despite the cuffs around my wrists and the chains attaching me to the wall. I watched as two guards argued.

      The one on the right poked the other guard in the chest. “What the hell were you thinking bringing someone like her here?”

        The one on the left grabbed Right’s wrist and shoved their hand away. “She’s one of those hunters who have been raiding our towns. Of course I brought her to jail once I took her down.”

         Right crossed their arms. “You took her down? Really? You?”

         Left nodded vigorously. “Yes, me. What’s that supposed to mean?”

          Right pointed at me. “It’s supposed to mean that she is one of them. No one except royal vamps can take one down.”

         “One of them?”

         I shook my head. Poor innocent little Left. 

           “A freak. A beast. A monster. You know?” Right prompted. 

          Left stepped back from the bars of my cell. “Fuck, really?”

         “Uh, yeah.” Right goraned. “Ugh. You’re such an idiot. What are we supposed to do with her now? She obviously let you capture her. Since there’s no way you could over power her.” 

       Right glanced at me. I smirked. Better for them to think I had a secret agenda and that Left didn’t just actually capture me because I was poisoned. I just had to fool them into thinking that I was at full power and could kill them until I actually could. 

        “We could put silver on her then find a royal to take care of her.” Left suggested, nervously. 

       Right sighed. “Get silver on her and I will ask the Boss lady about contacting a royal.”

         They walked away, and I cursed internally. Fuck. I needed to get out before a royal came. I wouldn’t be able to get out of silver especially not in my weakened state. Stupid, stupid, stupid. Fucking R and her stupid territory qualms. We couldn’t be fighting over land amongst ourselves when Vamps were still ruling most of the world. But, noooo. R and her stupid ass decided let’s poison this rogue werewolf that happened upon our land. She definitely won’t need to fight Vamps or anything because she just raided a town. 

       I heard Left’s footsteps returning and I erased all signs of panic from my face, opting instead for a look of cool indifference. Left came back into view holding an armful of silver. I could smell the distinctive metallic odor from down the hall. 

       Left pulled open the door the my cell and shut them behind them, dropping the silver on the ground. “Just behave and this will go easier.”

       I shrugged. “Like I care.” I resisted the urge to flinch as she began wrapping the chains around my arms. I forced a laugh. “Hate to disillusion you, but silver is actually weaker than the steel. It doesn’t hurt us, it’s a scam we made up to escape easier from you.”

         Left paused. “Really? But-“

        I cut her off. “But nothing. Go ahead and wrap me up and silver. I don’t mind it will make it easier to escape. Do you want that in your head. How many mistakes do you need on your record?” I started counting on my fingers. “First you bring me here endangering everyone, and now, second, you’re going to fail to lock me up securely. What happens to you when I escape here?” I smirked. “I suppose you end up on the streets.” I held my arms out to her. “Your choice.”

        Left began unwrapping the chains from my arms. I resisted breathing a sigh of relief as the burning left. My ruse had worked. The silver chains fell away, and Left picked them up.

      They opened the door and left. “Good luck escaping now.” They laughed. “You may be strong, but you’re not very smart. You shouldn’t have told me that. Now you’re doomed to fight the Royal.”

          I feigned fear. “Crap. My big mouth is going to get me killed.”

        I heard them laugh. “You should learn how to keep quiet.”

       I sunk to the floor in feigned defeat. Once I heard their footsteps fade, I began pulling at the chains. Ugh, I couldn’t break them. Stupid poison. I couldn’t shift, my strength was gone, and everything hurt. Stupid fucking R. I was going to die because if her, unless this Royal took several days to show up. Without food, water, or medicine, it would take several days for the poison o leave my system. 

          Maybe my defeat wasn’t so feigned after all. I was doomed.

32.1

        I wasn’t sure how long I had been in the cell. I had no way to tell time. The only reassurance that I had that time was moving was that the guards would change shifts. How often, I had no clue, but so far the shift had changed twice. All the vamp guards wore the same metal armor that covered them from head to toe so I had no way of knowing which guard was which. Was there only two switching off or more? Not that that would help. Whatever R had poisoned me with I had underestimated. I was only growing weaker by the hour. Whereas before I had only been cut off from wolf and thus my extra strength left still with the strength of a normal human, albeit a strong one, now I was steadily going down hill. I would struggle to fight off a normal vamp in my current condition. I had no hope of escape or surviving this fight. Urgh. Fuck R. Fuck her and her stupid territorial claims. I wasn’t even part of a pack. I wasn’t a threat to her or her territory, and now I’m going to die because of her. 

        At some point I had fallen unconscious, either asleep or front he poison I wasn’t sure. Either way I woke to voices outside my cell. 

        “Did you use silver on it?” A powerful voice asked. 

        “No. I was told not to by one of the other guards.” The muffled voice of a guard responded. 

         “Then, why is it so weak?”

         “We are not sure, but some of the guards theorize that it’s an act to lower our guard so it can attack, although it was acting quite cocky when we first brought it in.” The guard mused. “Since a regular Vamp captured it, some guards thought that it allowed itself to be captured for some reason. They are concerned that it may be a trap.”

         “Someone get some silver chains on it so I can have a closer look, but I doubt that it’s faking. It looks seriously unwell.”

        “Yes, Royal.” The guard saluted and left. 

        The Royal Vamp grabbed the bars peering through. “You really are in a sorry state. What happened to you? I’ve never seen anything like this before. Taken down without a single injury.” She shook her head. “So much for a beast. You’re more pathetic than a human.”

        I pushed myself up into a standing position glaring at the Royal Vamp. “Fuck you.”

         They laughed. “Fiesty one, aren’t you?” They paused. “Huh, strange I don’t recognize your scent. You’re not from a pack, are you?”

         I simple glared at her, despite the fact the I was forced to use the wall to stay standing.

         “A lone wolf. That’s a dangerous path.” They laughed to themselves. “Although I guess you know that now.”

        The guard returned with the silver, opening the door for the Royal. The Royal Vamp grabbed the chains and walked towards me. I heard the door clank shut although the Royal blocked my view. They were taller than me by a few inches and were wearing an elegant gown. Their long black hair fell beautifully down their back.

      I focused back on the silver cuffs. No was not the time to admire how beautiful Royal Vamps were. 

       They grabbed my arms roughly and pulled them in front of me causing me to stumble forward. I swayed slightly, as my vision spun. The burn of silver in my wrists gave me something to focus on other than the constant pain throughout my body. I managed to stand straight despite my entire body wanting to collapse.

       The Royal grabbed my face and peered at it. Then opened my mouth peering inside. I couldn’t fight even this. I really was pathetic. I struggled to even stand as the Royal looked all over my body. I was only wearing a cloth wrapping around my chest and a pair of loose pants. The idea was that transforming was easy, although that wasn’t a problem for me right now, seeing as I was completely cut off from my wolf, because of that damn poison.

       The Royal finally finished their inspection. “Let me offer you a deal.” I didn’t respond so the vamp continued. “I’m assuming you’re going to die whether I fight you or not, and I don’t really want to fight you because it wouldn’t even last a second. So,

I have a proposition. A way for you to live.”

       I stared up at her in confusion. What the hell are they talking about?

        “I will have my doctors try and heal you, but in return you have to be my slave.”

         “No.” I didn’t hesitate. There was no way in hell that I was becoming a Vamp’s slave. Especially, not a Royal. 

        “Are you sure? I can tell that you are strong, but just sick right now. I would love to have a fighter like you under my command. It would be a shame for someone as strong as you to just die.”

       Who is this Royal trying to convince? Like I would be swayed by the prospect of fighting for the people I had been fighting against. But... maybe I could get something out of this if she really want me that badly. 

        “If you let your human slaves go.” I offered. 

        “You’re not in a position to barter.”

       I shrugged. “Either I die now or I die later. I am still going to try and free these humans from your tyranny. They deserve better than being forced to live in hiding or to live as slaves.”

          “Why do you care about them? They are less than both of us.” The Royal pushed. 

        “Because, they are my family, and you Vamps took them away from me.” I spat. 

        The Royal sighed. “Okay, I’ll let the humans free. You will fight for me then?”

      I nodded. “If I survive.”

       “Perfect. We have a deal.” She turned to the guard. “This wolf is coming with me. Can you please come undo her chains.”

        “Yes, Royal.” The guard dutifully complied.

32.2

         I woke up on a bed. That was wrong. I hadn’t slept on a bed in years. I panicked sitting up quickly looking around. I found myself in a blank room. It only contained the bed I was on. The door was a simple wooden one with a round door handle. I slid off the military cot and took stock of the situation. I was healed, back to full strength. I reached for my wolf and felt the familiar connection. 

        I was in new clothes, different clothes. For one I was actually wearing a shirt. Someone, presumably the doctors had dressed me in a tight fitting athletic long sleeve shirt and pants. I grabbed the fabric in distaste. How the hell was i supposed to transform easily in this? I wasn’t a Vamp who wore armor. I needed to be able to take my clothes on and off easily. 

       Ugh, it didn’t matter. If the stupid Royal wanted to pay for me to have new clothes every time I shifted and ripped them then that was her choice. I headed to the door and twisted the handle. Unsurprisingly, it didn’t budge. I was a slave after all. I guess it was too much to hope for freedom to roam around the house or castle or wherever I was. I sat back in the bed. I could knock down the door, but that wouldn’t get me anywhere.

      I stood back up. To hell with it. I didn’t give a rats ass about follow any Vamp’s orders especially not a Royal’s. I grabbed the handle again to see if maybe it had suddenly become unlocked. Big surprise, it hadn’t. I punched through the wood next to the handle and reached through to turn the handle from the other side. The door swung open and I stepped into the hallway. Narrow with stone on both sides. I began walking down the hall when I hurried footsteps. To fast to be human. I spun to face the Royal. 

        They reached to grab my shoulder but I dodged the hit grabbing their arm and using their momentum to swing her over my shoulder. I spun to face them and they were already up on their feet. I prepared for the next attack, but it never came. 

          “I will not fight with you. A master doesn’t fight with their slave, only punish them.” They glared at me. “Best keep that in mind. We had an agreement. You are my slave. You listen to me. Any disobedience will be punished.”

           I smirked. “Never said I would be an obedient slave.” I began stepping back from her. They lunged forward and grabbed for my neck, missing. I was yanked forwards. What the fuck? She was gripping a chain in her hand. The chain of a necklace. A necklace that was around my neck. 

      They pulled me towards them and growled in my ear. “You know what this is? This is a collar. Loose enough to fit around your wolf. This marks that I own you. Don’t forget that.” She paused. “And, If you don’t start listening I will get human slaves again. Do you submit to me?”

         “I submit.” I whispered out.

       They let go of the collar. “Good, now come with me. You’re going to help train some vamps.”

          I gestured to my clothes. “Not in this I won’t.”

        They sighed. “Am I supposed to let you go walking around half naked?”

       “Yes, if you don’t want me to shred my clothes.” I pulled at the long sleeves. “This takes too long to take off. There’s a reason I wore what I did.”

         “Fine, I’ll get you different clothes.” They relented.

        “Thanks, Vamp.”

         “You can call me by my rank, Royal or my name, Vanessa, but not Vamp.” They demanded.

        I shrugged. “Okay, V.”

       They sighed. “Whatever, close enough. Now what is your name.”

        I paused. “Umm, I forgot.”

       They growled in irritation. “You, forgot?”

       I shrugged. “Uh, Yeah?”

       She paused. “You’re not lying?”

       “I wish I was.” I admitted. “I haven’t been called by a name since I was little, I don’t remember what it was. It never seemed important.”

         “You’ve been alone for that long?” She asked, with what might have been pity. 

       I shrugged. “Yeah, I guess you can just call me whatever.” Distaste entered my voice. “You’re my, ugh, Master, so it’s not like what I say matters.”

       They paused at a door. “We’re here Wolf. Shred those clothes for now, I’ll have a different pair for when we’re done.” They opened the door exposing a large outdoor training field. “Shift. Then we’ll begin.”

        I growled at the command but complied, shifting into my wolf form. The necklace was now snug around my neck, but not too tight. My gray fur contrasted the brown dirt of the training grounds.

      They pointed at me and while walking away towards another building. “Stay. I will return in armor and with some other Warriors.”

         I growled, hating being ordered around, but I listened. I enjoyed being back in this form. I stretched out as I waited for the Vamps to return. Finally, the door of the building opened and out came V followed by several other Vamps. They were all wearing armor, lighter than the guards, consisting of just a chestplate, boots and gauntlets. 

         V strode towards me. “This is a rare opportunity to train against a beast without being in danger of dying because Wolf here will not be killing anyone.” She gave me a pointed glare. “But, they’re still allowed to hurt you and will fight without holding back.” She looked at me making sure I understood. I nodded and began circling the group of Vamps. 

        They charged at me in a group but I easily dodged the attack grabbing the last Vamp by the leg and swinging them around the be slammed into the ground. I tore my paw across their chest growling in their face. I latched my jaws around their neck but just left several imprints, instead of ripping it out. The others had surrounded me slowly closing in. I charged straight for the one in front of me. They grabbed my neck holding my mouth back from their face, but I kicked my back paws clawing them in the stomach, my claws easily cutting through the metal. They dropped me in surprise and the other vampires closed in on me. I jumped off the bloody Vamp and escaped their circle. I ran around the field circling them, slowly closing in. One began chasing after me and I stopped, spinning around to catch the speeding vamp by surprise. I latched my teeth into their leg and pulled them to a harsh stop. I followed up by pouncing on their back and closing my jaws around their necks. I left red dots of blood as a souvenir before turning to deal with the remaining few. 

        I dispatched them with relative ease, and turned to V. She nodded. “Good job Wolf. The rest of you get healed up, but wait and watch. I’m going to fight them now.”

          We circled around them, waiting for the other to move. V shot forwards hoping to grab me. They were much faster than the other Vamps, but not fast enough. I dodged the grab and instead latched my teeth into one of her arms. Her coppery blood filled my mouth, as I tugged. She brought her other hand down, punching me in the back. I released her arm and jumped back. Blood was dripping from my mouth, as I prepared to lunge. I leaned for her face, she grabbed my under my front arms, but I used my back feet to claw through her armor and to her stomach. She grunted in pain but ignored the blood, squeezing me. I howled in pain, as I struggled in their grasp. I managed to twist my head and latch my teeth into their arm, ripping the flesh out with a yank. She was forced to let me go with that arm and I twisted out of her other grasp landing on my paws. 

         She was bleeding from multiple areas and I was barely injured, so what was her plan. I began circling again breaking into a sprint as my circle grew wider. I built up speed until I was going as fast as I could while turning. V was spinning in place following my movement carefully. Suddenly, I clawed the ground and turned quickly charging straight at V at full speed. She crouched ready to catch me, but at the last second I threw myself down to the ground sliding under her reaching hands and knocking her off her feet. I pounced on her back and closed my jaws around her neck. I tightened just enough to draw blood letting them know I could kill her. I stood back as V brushed herself off. 

     She addressed the other Vamps angrily. “Leave.” When they hesitated V shouted. “Now!”

        She pointed to me. “Come with me. I have clothes for you to put on, then I need to drink your blood.”

       I growled. What the fuck? Drink my blood? Why mine?

        She scowled. “Don’t act so surprised. You made me get rid of my humans, so I have no humans to drink blood from, so I have to drink yours. How else will I heal from this beating you gave me?”

        I sighed and reluctantly followed her into the building. 

        We entered into a locker room of some sort, and she gestured to a pile of clothes. “Those are yours.”

         I sniffed them with my nose, inspecting them. It was a pair of sweatpants and a cloth wrap for my chest. I shifted and tugged in the paints then began wrapping my chest with quick, practiced movements. I turned around and V was right there. 

       She grinned, baring her fangs. “Ready?”

        I shrugged. “Like I have a choice.”

       She just grinned grabbing me and pulling me closer. I could feel her hot breathe on my neck. Then pain as her fangs pierced my skin. I cried out in pain, but the pain was quickly replaced by a numbness as her venom entered my system. I was forced to lean on them for support as my body grew weak from the venom. She finally pulled her fangs out and the effects of the venom went away.

       I pushed them away and stood up. “Ugh.” I groaned. 

       She just grinned, licking their lips. “You taste delicious, .”

        I scowled stepping back. My hand instinctively shooting up to my neck where the bite mark had healed into a scar. I rubbed it uncertainly while stepping back. I hated how much control this Royal had over me. Being forced to let my sworn enemy drink my blood was the biggest insult to my goal of taking down the Vampire regime. 

         “Come with me Wolf. I have work and I need you to work so I’m assigning you to work for one of the other Vamps. I will still need you for training so I will use you some days but otherwise you will be reporting to Ira.”  She commanded stalking out of the room. I followed her obediently despite feeling several bruises developing around my rib cage from where they grabbed me. 

         She led me across the field and around the building then to a different building, also stone, bigger than the barracks but smaller than the main castle. She pushed open the large wooden, calling out. “Ira, I got you a replacement slave. I’ll need to borrow them from time to time, but otherwise they’re yours.”

         I entered the building as V shoved me. Large stalls lined the walls so I must be in a barn. A vampire wearing jeans and a shirt came around the corner of the stalls, carrying a hay bale easily with one hand. 

          “Hey, there. I’m Ira.” She nodded at me. “Come with me and I’ll get you settled.”

         I followed her down the hall and she set the hay bale down.

      She turned to me brushing off her hands holding one out to me. “What’s your name?”

         I stared questioningly at her hand before hesitantly shaking it. “I don’t have one.” I paused before adding. “But, V has been calling me Wolf.”

          “V, eh?” She laughed, turning to walk down the hall. “Guessing she doesn’t like that.”

         I shook my head. “No, but I’ll be damned if I have to listen to everything that Vamp says.”

          She paused. “Don’t like us much?”

          “Nope.” I growled, my anger growing at the mention.

        She pushed open a door. “Well not all of us are bad. Anyways, this is where you will be staying.” 

        I glanced in the room. It had a small bed and a chair in it. It was maybe twice the size of the bed. Some clothes were stacked on the chair, and boots were next to it. 

       She glanced at my outfit. “I suggest putting on something more covering, but it’s your choice. At least put the boots on though.”

         I walked into the room looking at the clothes, jeans a t-shirt and a jacket, as well as underwear, a bra, and socks. I slipped off my pants and replaced them with the jeans, slipping on the socks and boots. 

        I glanced at Ira who had averted her eyes. “I would prefer not to wear a shirt. I’m not used to it.”

       She shook her head laughing. “Okay, no shame I guess. Just don’t get complained when things poke you.” She gestured to the hall. “Come on, horses to train, stalls to clean, and water and food to be filled.”

         I nodded following her.

         She walked quickly down the hall. “I’ve already giving morning rations and filled water buckets this morning, so for now we just have to train. Well take care of the stalls with the night feeding.” She turned into a tack room, grabbing halters. “Have you ever ridden Wolf?”

          I shook my head. “No.”

        She tossed a halter at me, which I caught. “Well, time to learn.”

         She exited the barn and started down a path that led to a large pasture. “First step: catching the horse. You want to be slow and not spook them. These horses are not regular horses and are much faster than either of us. Approach slowly from the side to not spook them. I want you to catch the bay mare, that’s a female with a brown body and black man.”

       I nodded. “Okay.”

         “Just slip the halter over her head. Princess is a good girl and shouldn’t give you trouble.” She instructed. 

          I spotted the bay mare across the paddock. And began walking towards her, when I got closer I slowed and approached from the side. Sure enough, as Ira said, the mare did not move. I grabbed the halter and slid it over her head buckling the strap behind her ears. I grabbed the lead rope and led her to where Ira was waiting at the gate with a black gelding. When Ira opened the gate, the gelding shot out and I was impressed by the strength she used to rein him back in. Nervously I copied her actions and led the mare out the gate, but princess just obediently followed, a stark contrast to the black gelding who was still tugging at the lead rope. 

         Ira held firm on the lead rope and waited until he came to a standstill before patting his neck and starting to walk again. We walked back to the barn and led the horses into the hall where Ira grabbed ropes from the walls and clipped them to the geldings halter. 

       She pointed to the hall on the other side of the door. “Do the same thing with princess over there.”

       I nodded and copied her actions. She then guided me through putting the tack on and leading princess out to the arena. She then carefully taught me how to get on and ride. She left me with the warning to be careful before taking the geldin to a fenced off ring and working with him. 

        It felt so strange to be mounted upon a horse. Princess responded to my commands easily, but I was too nervous to go faster than a walk. Ira has promised to teach me more over the following months. Both how to train and how to ride, so that I could be more help. 

         As the sun set, I found myself back in the barn mucking out stalls while Ira gave the food. When we were finally done, I sighed gratefully and began heading back to my room.

          “Where are you going?” Ira asked. 

         “Uh, to my room?”

          Ira laughed. “Come on Silly. You need to get food first. You did good work today.”

        I turned and followed back out of the barn, passing several horses who stared at us curiously. “Why are some horses outside, and others in stalls?” I wondered out loud, not expecting a response. 

         “Oh, that’s because the ones in stalls need to be fresh in case the Royal or her men need horses quickly. They are our war horses. The ones outside are for training.” Ira answered.

        “Thanks.”

[dank-hp--memes]

Deep Connection: Part 6

So I had originally posted this part, but it was taken down for some heavy editing. I love to hear your feedback and appreciate any comments.

Tags: @shit-in-silk-stocking

---

The evening of May 7th, 1986

Just after Khomyuk’s release

Together, Khomyuk and Legasov stand in the dark between the streetlights. Legasov holds her tightly against him, the faint smell of orchids still emanating faintly from her hair, from her shower the previous morning. He presses his nose to the top of her head and gently puts his hand on the back of her head. Legasov sighs in relief, tilting his head back and looking up at the sky. Khomyuk looks up at him and their eyes meet. She is not the same. Her eyes are tired, and the fire that once burned within them has gone out. She looks worn out, her skin a bit papery and pale. Legasov takes notice of this and pushes away what is worrying him.

“I was so worried about you…” Legasov says softly as he looks down at her.

“Oh?” Khomyuk says, her voice distant as though she is not paying attention.

“I was afraid they would hurt you…” He says softly, lifting her chin to get a better look at her face

“I believe I can handle myself, comrade…” Khomyuk says stiffly, turning away.

“I know you can… Ulana there is no need to be so formal, we have been through enough together” Legasov says, shocked by how cold she has suddenly become.

Khomyuk sighs and looks up at him as she says “I-I’m sorry, I don’t know what came over me”

She manages to smile a little, calming her mind as she kisses him softly. Legasov smiles and takes her hand, still worried about her well-being. Khomyuk lays her head against his shoulder as they stand side by side.  Legasov smiles a little as they continue down the street, completely ignoring the car waiting for him in the street. They chat quietly about nothing in particular as they walk hand in hand down the street. It is nice, and both Khomyuk and Legasov are able to forget their problems, for now.

As they approach Khomyuk's hotel, Legasov slows and looks down at her. He thinks about how long she had spent in that cell. Khomyuk looks up at him a little confused as he stops.

“I’m sorry. It’s just that you've been locked up for an awfully long time...” Legasov says, pausing briefly nervous about what he wants to ask, “Have you eaten recently Ulana?”

Khomyuk shakes her head and laughs a little. “Are you asking me to dinner comrade?” Khomyuk asks, raising an eyebrow at him.

Legasov smiles a little as he says: “Well, would you like to?”

Khomyuk sighs and looks up at him “It seems almost comical, us, going to dinner…” she mumbles.

Legasov remains silent for a moment, not really understanding. Khomyuk takes a moment and studies his face.

“I suppose it would be rather nice… to go out. God I can hardly remember the last time I went out with someone” Khomyuk finally says, smiling up at him

“You're not the only one…” Legasov says, hardly remembering the last time he went out in general.

Upon their arrival at Khomyuk’s hotel, Legasov looks around the drab and indistinct lobby, the desk clerk looks up at them and quickly writes something down. Khomyuk turns to Legasov as they stand in the lobby. Legasov gently touches her arm as he looks down into her enchanting blue eyes.

“If you still want to go to dinner, I-I need to go shower and change out of these clothes,” Khomyuk says as they stand in the hotel lobby.

“I can wait here, I don’t mind,” Legasov says softly, kissing her cheek before sitting down in one of the unmemorable chairs in the lobby.

Khomyuk smiles a little as she says “Alright, I'll try not to take too long”

“Take all the time you need Ulana, I don’t mind waiting for you,” Legasov says, his heart aching for her, even though she is standing right in front of him.

He watches as she disappears up the stairs. Legasov looks around quietly, surveying and analyzing the lobby. The desk clerk glances at him every few minutes and writing something down behind the desk. Many couples and groups of young adults roam the lobby, the buzz of their many conversations fills the air. No one’s secrets safe, almost every spoken word in the hands of the KGB. Legasov looks into a grimy mirror, covered in oily smudges, that almost every hotel has, on the wall of the lobby, watching as the reflections of people pass by. He nonchalantly pulls out a cigarette before looking around the room. A few bland paintings hang on the tan walls. The wall behind the large wooden main desk is a deep red accent wall with no paintings on it. The trim on all of the walls is white, and the floor is marble, but there is a carpet leading up the staircase. Legasov looks around at the many people coming and going. Many are accompanied by friends, family, and their dates. He thinks back to the last time he went out for fun, back when he was still just a student in college. Legasov had a girl back then, a woman he could have spent the rest of his days with, but she did not want to wait for him to finish with his education. After her, there really wasn’t anyone else, only a few friends from work or women he would share drinks with, but there was never anyone he truly connected with, never anyone he truly connected with like he has with Ulana.

Eventually, Legasov spots Khomyuk as she is coming down the last few stairs. Her hair is set in her normal soft, silky, shoulder-length curls. Legasov notices her cheeks are a bit flushed. She looks beautiful and happy, she seems to glow with life, and it is not just a façade, he can sense that some of her determination and stubbornness has returned. Legasov is reminded of the woman she was the evening they first met, back in Pripyat. Khomyuk is wearing a rather ornate deep blue dress with a fairly low-cut neckline. She paired it with some low black heels and a small handbag, for just the essentials. Moreover, she wears a light coat in the color grey. Legasov stands up as Khomyuk approaches him.

“I’m so sorry for taking so long, Valery” Khomyuk says, smiling a little as he stands up.

“It hasn’t been that long. There is no need to apologize” Legasov says, smiling as he gets a whiff of her perfume.

Khomyuk blushes a little and shakes her head. “You are too kind…” she mumbled.

“So, my dear, shall we go to dinner?” Legasov asks, offering her his arm.

“I suppose we shall,” Khomyuk says with a slight chuckle.

They join the many others who seem to be going out. Khomyuk and Legasov walk arm in arm out of the hotel as if they had done so a million times before. There are many people out this particular night, either going to see a play or show of some sort or simply enjoying the beautiful spring evening. Of course, many of the people out are younger or simply more sociable than the two scientists. They walk a couple of blocks- wanting to enjoy their time together- before entering a rather fancy restaurant. Open tables seem scarce, so Khomyuk and Legasov end up at a small table for two in one of the cramped corners. Looking around, they see many young couples, most on first or second dates. There are also many large groups of friends, trying to squeeze in dinner before an event of sorts.

Once they are seated, they are given glasses of water and Legasov orders them a nice bottle of wine, despite the fact that it is likely a bit watered down. They sit in silence for a few moments as they look over the menus. Suddenly, Legasov looks up at Khomyuk, realizing that they know very little about one another. It bothers him a bit at first, for he does not know how to properly bring up the conversation. Khomyuk smiles a little as she sees him staring at her.

“Is something bothering you Valery?” Khomyuk says softly, placing her menu on the table.

Legasov swallows, and grins a little as he admits, “I just wish we had met under different circumstances…”

“Oh Valery, you would have hated me” Khomyuk teases laughing.

“You really think so?” Legasov says as he smiles at her.

Khomyuk nods as she takes a sip of wine. “We probably would have met at a meeting or a presentation. I might have even attended one of your presentations” She theorizes.

Legasov nods in agreement. “You’re probably right” he mumbles

“Afterward, I probably would have tried to ask you about a million questions, or I would have told you that you were wrong,” Khomyuk says laughing.

“I would have probably would have argued with you,” Legasov says laughing.

“And I would have argued back” Khomyuk admits, embarrassed.

“that would have been a mess...” Legasov admits, feeling horrible about admitting it.

Khomyuk laughs a little and gently takes his hand.

“I believe we could have made something work,” She said softly, looking into his pale blue eyes.

They share a few moments of silence before it is interrupted by a waiter. They order their food before sitting in slightly awkward silence.

“So…” Khomyuk says, breaking the silence, “when was the last time you went out?”

“Well, I used to go out with colleagues after work every once in a while,” Legasov says softly, “But, I haven’t been to dinner with a woman since I was in my thirties… What about you?”

Khomyuk looks down at the table for a moment, some of the happiness fading from her eyes. “I haven’t gone out since I was still married… that was forever ago” she mumbles

“What-what happened to your husband,” Legasov asks, nervous that it may upset her.

“He left me for another, younger, prettier woman” Khomyuk mumbled, looking up at him

“Prettier than you? I doubt any woman could be prettier than you Ulana” Legasov says, caressing the back of her hand with his thumb.

“I came home one night and found him with another woman, in our bed. After that, I hardly left work. I spent so little time at home with my family. Eventually, he and this woman took my daughter and left without a word. All I got was a note. I have tried reaching out, but my daughter has been convinced that I am a monster… that I am the reason our family fell apart” Khomyuk mumbles, her voice breaking, and tears coming to her eyes.

“Oh my dear,” Legasov says softly, moving to sit beside her.

He wraps his arm around her as she wipes her eyes.

“I’ve been alone ever since they left… up until I met you, I was never interested in another relationship” Khomyuk whispers as she looks up at him.

“I had no idea you had a family before… as a scientist, I didn’t assume you were the motherly type, but I see it now” Legasov says softly, caressing her cheek.

Khomyuk chuckles and shakes her head. “I never wanted to be a mother until I found out I was pregnant. My mind was always on my work or my education, so I never thought about starting a family. God, you should have seen me. I worked through my entire pregnancy. I was determined not to let it slow me down” Khomyuk says, smiling slightly.

“How on earth did you manage that?” Legasov exclaims, laughing a bit.

“Well, the morning sickness wasn’t pleasant, but after that, it went fairly smoothly. That is, until my third trimester” Khomyuk says, laughing a little as she thinks back to how she managed.

“I miss my family… I regret not choosing the right man to start one with” Khomyuk says softly, gazing up at him.

They sit in silence for a moment and Khomyuk lays her head on Legasov's shoulder.

“I-I never really thought about a family, I was always so wrapped up in my work,” Legasov says softly as he holds Khomyuk in his arms.

She looks up at him quietly for a moment. “did you not ever have a woman you loved?” She asks softly

“I did, but she did not want to wait for me to finish my education. I loved her, enough to have a family, but I wasn’t around enough” Legasov says softly, looking into her eyes.

Khomyuk quietly leans against him, “She has no idea what she turned down, leaving you” She mumbled, taking his hand.

They sit in silence for a few moments as the waiter approaches and sets down their food. They eat in silence, sitting beside one another, fairly content. As Khomyuk pushes her plate away, Legasov kisses her softly, tasting the last sip of wine on her lips. They sit in silence waiting for the check. Khomyuk is leaning against Legasov, who has his arm wrapped around her. Legasov watches her quietly, it is obvious that she is deep in thought. He contemplates what they should do upon leaving the restaurant. Legasov looks out the window at the street and contemplates taking her back to his apartment. Would she mind it or find it gross? Would she mind his cat, or his cleanliness, or the smell of cigarettes that permanently plague the air? The waiter comes with the check, interrupting Legasov's thoughts, and he is saved from asking her for now.

A few hours have passed since they finished dinner, Legasov had mustered all of his courage and invited her to his apartment. They had walked the streets together, talking about nothing in particular. They had gathered Khomyuk’s things from her hotel room before going to Legasov’s apartment.

Upon opening the door, Legasov's cat, Sasha, wanders out and nuzzles against Khomyuk’s legs. A radiant smile crosses Khomyuk’s face as she bends down and begins to pet Sasha. Legasov cannot help but smile as he takes Khomyuk’s things inside. For a moment he considers never returning to Chernobyl, for he could spend the remainder of his life here with Khomyuk. Legasov knows that he could spend every second of every day with her at his side. He puts her bag in the small spare bedroom before returning. He sees that Khomyuk has sat down on his sofa with Sasha. A smile crosses his face as he stands at the entrance to the room, staring at Khomyuk. Just the sight of her puts him in a bit of a trance. She was the thing he had always needed, and now, he could not imagine his life without her.

[medea10]

My Review of My Roommate is a Cat

[seashellrosekitty]

Shielded | Derek Hale x Reader (Part 1)

Pairing: Derek Hale x Female Reader

Plot: You’re driving to Beacon Hills to help Deaton with something. You meet Derek Hale, who is deeply wounded and is paralyzed.

Word Count: 3,697 (14-minute read)

Warnings: This story will eventually lead to having smut scenes, profanity, and even gory details in the next chapters.

A/N: Welcome to my first Imagine! This isn’t requested and is purely inspired by other imagines here on Tumblr. Enjoy! :)

***

“Why do I have to move to Beacon Hills?” You think to yourself.  You were already happy with your life in Frisco. Oh right, there’s a mystery you need to solve. Not that you are a detective of some sort. You’re a full-blown empath.  And this is why you’re driving to Beacon Hills alone. This is the reason for many things in your life, in fact. Why you’re single, why you prefer so much space and time away from people, why you don’t really like to touch other people and why you’re so careful about making physical contact with formerly owned objects.

As you drive a straight road, you think about these things, reflecting once more, why did you take this job? You are good friends with Dr. Deaton, being involved in similar experiences sometime in the past. He called you for a pressing, ‘empath’ job. And unfortunately, you’ll need to do this more than once, probably. You have a love/hate relationship with your profession. It is your natural ability to understand and empathize with others. The difference you have with werewolves and their heightened senses is that you need to be close to your subject of interest. You now arrive in Deaton’s clinic, expecting him to be there, as he always is. You knock on the front door.

“Doc? You here? It’s me, (Y/N).” You call out. You hear footsteps coming from inside the clinic as you wait by the desk.  For an animal clinic, there are much fewer animals, you think to yourself.

“Ah, (Y/N), thank you for coming. I didn’t know who else to call,” Deaton shakes your hand and gives you a hug as a gesture of seeing you after a long time.

“Don’t worry about it. How have you been?” You say as you naturally express concern for your old friend.

“I’m perfectly fine. I’m glad you’re here. And you came just in time too. I have someone here I need you to look at. He was paralyzed by some creature we haven’t identified yet,” Deaton says and leads you inside the clinic. As you walk in, you could already feel countless terrors coming from the walls of the room. There, you find an unconscious man laying down the metal table.

“This is Derek Hale. He’s a werewolf,” Deaton tells you.  You nod at him but don’t respond.  You look at the patient and observe him. You don’t come near him just yet. You notice how he’s breathing normally for someone who’s hurt and paralyzed. Derek Hale’s torso is bandaged and his wounds are all over his body. It’s not easy to tell how he got hurt. Your stomach is about to turn upside down when you smell the stench coming from his wounds.

“Are you sure he wasn’t in some form of trauma or accident that led him to paralysis? Maybe he should be in the hospital,” You say to Deaton, and he shakes his head.

“I found him here before he collapsed and then paralyzed. I didn’t even know that was possible. He clearly wanted to be treated here. It must be some kind of creature Beacon Hills hasn’t heard of yet.” You look at him in disbelief, remembering how Beacon Hills is more supernatural than most towns. “Notice these claw marks on his ribs. There’s nothing like it.” Deaton tells you as much as he knows, leaving you to the reason why he called you in the first place.

Now you decide to come close to the table. You look at the man’s wounds, the giant claw marks, but still hesitate to touch them.  You observe his breathing again and definitely trying to ignore the good physique this werewolf has. Do they magically grow washboard abs after being bitten? Like Spider-Man? You think to yourself but snap out of it. This is the reality.

You approach his right side, and you slowly touch his right hand with yours, as if you were introducing yourself to him. His hand is not as warm as you expect it to be, but you start to see how much this man has gone through by the roughness of his palm. As you brace yourself for what you’re about to see and feel, you take a deep breath and slowly close your eyes.

Your visions come in swift images. A dark, hostile figure coming to attack the man as you see it in his perspective. You could feel his defensive state he was in before he was hurt, but he was scared too. You feel sudden changes of emotions coming from him and most are repressed ones. The last he had was fear. Unfortunately, you couldn’t see what he was afraid of before being paralyzed. You’re certain it wasn’t his death he was afraid of.

“I couldn’t make out the creature that attacked him. He was attacked last night. It was dark, he was in the woods. And this creature was…well, a monster. Definitely hostile, and out of control,” You say to Deaton with your eyes closed, still trying to find memories from this unconscious werewolf. You realize Deaton may have already assumed everything you’ve said. It’s easy to theorize what you just envisioned.  Deaton doesn’t say anything so he doesn’t interrupt your trance. As you try to keep looking inside Derek’s head, you decide to hold his forehead in the hopes of seeing more. But you get distracted from the noise in the background – what seems to you would be the worried pack that this werewolf is a member of.

“We came as soon as we got your call,” You hear someone say this behind you but Deaton shushes him. You could now feel all the new energies emanating from the room. They were probably three, or four people not including Deaton watching what you’re doing.

“What’s going on?” A woman’s whisper distracts you again as your hearing from the physical world is always better than your hearing in the empathic state.

“Please remain silent. I’m trying to find out what happened to your friend here. I’ll explain everything later. Just, please. Do relax too. I could feel the tension from here,” You say as you turn your head to face your right, showing these people that you are talking to them and that you mean business.

You still see the same sight of the dark creature when you keep your left hand on his head, so you decide to move your left hand to his chest, hoping it would show you more than what you’ve already seen. Your right hand remains in his so that your empathic contact doesn’t break. No images come into your head. But a surge of energy is starting to build on your palms. Your nerves are trembling now. You know you’re either about to see or feel something in a matter of seconds. You feel restless, scared, and tired. And because you’re an emotional being, all of this makes you want to cry. You keep your tears until you couldn’t, and tears start falling from your closed eyes. This combination of emotions is coming from this werewolf, and you’re fighting hard to contain it. You feel all of Derek’s emotions too strongly that you no longer feel the presence of the people behind you. You’re still aware that they’re there, but they don’t disrupt this moment for you.

No more images come into your mind, and you decide to break contact to keep what’s left of your energy for the rest of the day. You take another deep breath before removing your hands from the werewolf’s hand and chest. You take a moment to make sense of the physical world. This is how you ground yourself every time after a trance.

Since you are familiar with the clinic, you head to the sink and wash your hands. You do this to cleanse yourself of Derek’s energy. Finally, you wipe your tears and take a couple more breaths. You hear indistinct conversations from the group and you know they have so many questions.  But you take your time. After wiping your wet hands, you turn over to them and walk silently towards them. There are four teenagers, you confirm. Two boys and two girls.

“Guys, this is Y/F/N, Y/L/N. She’s an old friend of mine. I called her to help us figure out the creature that attacked Derek. Y/N, meet the pack. Scott McCall, Stiles Stilinski, Allison Argent, and Lydia Martin.” You shake hands with each of them.

“Are all of your werewolves too?” You ask them.

“Scott’s the only one,” Stiles answers you as he puts his arm around Scott. You nod and think about what to say next.

“So what exactly were you doing there? How’s Derek doing?” Scott asks you.  You turn back to look at Derek again and remember what you saw.

“He’s gonna be fine. Actually, he could use your emotional support right now,” You answer him monotonously.

“Yeah, like he would ever admit that,” Stiles says with a chuckle. The two girls agree with him but you notice they want a better answer from you.

“Well, I was trying to see his latest memories before he passed out and got paralyzed. I need to hold his hand to be able to do that. And all I saw was this dark creature. Hostile and out of control. He’s a serious threat to your friend. And to all of you.” You tell them, and the room is now in a serious atmosphere. “I've brought some of my stuff that could help him heal from paralysis. I’m quite sure this is just temporary paralysis just like that from a Kanima’s attack. Only this one gives him nightmares,” You say to all of them and head to your car to get your bag.

“What is she? Why can she see memories?” The group’s questions bombard Deaton as you leave the room. Deaton tells them what you are. As far as you’re concerned, you’re just a human being, and being able to do these things doesn’t make you any different than those who couldn’t. Except for space you need from people every now and then. As you go back inside the clinic, the atmosphere somewhat changed and yet you still feel awkward with these worried teenagers and what you notice as hyped energy. Or as most people call it, raging hormones.

“It’s hard to see it from it from the outside, but whenever his nerves are twitching, that’s the time his nightmares feel real. And I think that has something to do with his paralysis,” You say to them, and you bring out a small bottle of oil from your bag and open to let Derek smell some of it. Its scent is strong enough to be smelt by werewolves and give quite a lasting effect.  Afterward, you put a pea-sized amount of the oil on your palm and spread it on both your palms. You put some oil on Derek’s palms, the center of his forehead, and the rest of it in the center of his chest. You start to state a prayer with your breath, making the words inaudible to the group. You close your eyes as you do this and start massaging Derek on the areas where you put the oil.

“Is she a masseuse too? Maybe I could go next ‘cause I feel sore from all the running – “ Stiles says and gets smacked on the shoulder by Scott, easily gaining the group’s annoyance. Slowly rubbing the oil on the center of his head, you use your thumb to make a final upward motion that makes Derek’s body jerk in shock. It surprises everyone except you.

“Whoa, what the hell was that?” The group asks you.

“I’m trying to snap him from his nightmares. And soon, from his paralysis too, I hope,” You answer, and turn to Deaton. “May I ask for some water, please?” Deaton immediately rushes to get you a glass of water. You grab the glass as Deaton comes back with it and drink from it right away.

“Dude, she’s weird,” Stiles says to Scott. Scott smacks Stiles again and says “Shut up,” but smiles amusingly at him.

“Does this procedure make her thirsty?” Allison asks.

“All the time,” Deaton answers. “What she’s doing right now is giving some healing energy to Derek. The way I see it, Derek’s werewolf couldn’t heal from the paralysis. It’s probably why he fell unconscious first before being paralyzed. His werewolf being his alter ego, is also the last one to be affected by the attack.”

Suddenly, Derek’s body jerks rapidly more than once, disturbing the calm in the room. The group rushes to the table to hold Derek down but you warn them not to.

“His physical reaction to the procedure is a good sign. I think he’s healing from the inside out.” You repeat the procedure and continue emanating energy from inside you and transfer it to him. After a few more upward strokes of your thumb on his forehead, Derek’s finally able to regain consciousness and almost turns into his werewolf self, obviously being on defense mode. You take a few steps back away in panic as his friends hold him down to keep him from turning.  

“Derek! It’s us! You’re safe! It’s all right!” Scott exclaims. You look at his searing red eyes and it startles you since you’ve never met an Alpha before. He roars loudly and it sends your heart jumping in fright. When his panicked look meets yours, his eyes turn back to his normal color -  green, and he calms down. His look changes from being defensive to almost in doubt that he is where he is. You leave his friends to explain to him what happened, and what you were doing to him.  

Meanwhile, you’re not sure if you should wash your hands again but you find yourself doing it anyway – anything to keep yourself busy and away from the potentially hostile patient. Deaton introduces you to Derek as you finish washing your hands and wiping them, only to touch Derek’s again for a handshake.

“Thanks for saving my life,” Derek says to you as he hangs his legs from the metal table. You shake your head. “I didn’t. Deaton did,” You say as you glance at Deaton.

“Well, it certainly felt like I was dying. Over and over.” Derek looks down and runs both hands across his head.

“I think what I did was snap you out of your nightmares. Did that cause your paralysis?” You ask him.

“How did you know I was having nightmares?” Derek asks you while he looks at his bruises and wounds.

“She’s psychic,” Stiles interrupts. Derek looks at him irritatingly, still waiting for your answer. For some reason, the rest of the group doesn’t bother to tell him themselves. “Seriously. We live in a world where werewolves and Kanimas exist but you all are skeptical about psychics?” All of you look at Stiles to shut him up.

“I’m an empath. I assume you know what that is?” You turn to Derek.

“Never heard of it. But coming from the word empath, I think I know what you do,” Derek replies. “Does anyone have a clean shirt around here?” You raise your eyebrows in agreement to the question. He should’ve had his shirt on the whole time, you think. You notice that this may happen frequently because the pack did bring extra clothes for Derek. All but a first aid kit.

“Do you still remember what attacked you? What happened?” Scott starts asking the vital questions.

“I don’t know – I…” Derek pinches the skin between his eyes. “It looked like a Kanima, I guess, but it sounded like a wolf. I don’t even know what he did to put me in paralysis.” You quietly listen as Derek says this to the pack. The rest of the pack waits for him to finish recollecting his memories from the attack.

“It’s easy to assume that the creature’s very claws could paralyze the nerves. I don’t know about the nightmares, though.” Deaton adds.

“What were you doing before you were attacked?” You ask him, not moving an inch from where you stand – a good distance from the pack.

“Didn’t you sense the creature before you were attacked?” Scott adds, hinting a tone of worry. Derek gathers himself more but finds it difficult to.

“I sensed him. But it came out of nowhere.”

“I felt that –“ everyone suddenly turn their heads to look at you, and you feel as though you were interrupting Derek. But you continue. “The creature was out of control. Did you feel this too?” You ask him with genuine interest.

“I think it was. Why?”

“It could be a new breed,” Scott suggests.

“It could be a hybrid,” Stiles adds.

“It could be anything,” Lydia responds.

“Or it could be an experiment,” Deaton suggests, and you look at him, confirming that you thought of the same thing.

“An experiment went wrong,” Allison concludes.

“I think we should look it up,” Derek says to wrap up the discussion, and slowly gets down from the metal table.

“Derek, I suggest you take more rest. Take Y/N with you. Let her look after you. Especially with those nightmares,” Deaton says to Derek. Derek doesn’t reply but looks at you and nods. You do the same.

“You can ride in my car if you want a quiet trip home,” You offer him a tiny smile, thinking that Derek might not like riding with his pack carrying a vulnerable mind and possibly, heightened senses. This suggestion makes Derek smile and he just nods at you in agreement.

You proceed to your car while Scott helps Derek walk towards it. Scott goes to the blue Jeep parked beside your car once he closed the door for Derek.  You all agree to drive as a convoy.  The pack leads you to Derek’s loft. You turn on the radio in a low volume and play your Spotify. You just want to make sure your head stays clear and not be distracted by what could be another episode of Derek’s nightmares. As you arrive at the loft, you wake Derek up as softly as you could.

“Mr. Hale, you can wake up now. We’re at your place.” Derek opens up his eyes and finds the outdoors too bright even when the weather is gloomy. You reach for your baseball cap on the back seat and lend it to him without hesitation. “Here.” You put on the cap on his head gently to relieve him from the eyesore.

“Thanks,” Derek says in a grunting voice, trying to find his strength to sit up straight. “Y/N, right?” You then answer a low “Yeah.”

“Please call me Derek.” This makes you smile a little, noting that he noticed you being so formal with him earlier. Maybe he wasn’t really sleeping after all.

“Sure. Can you stand up and walk, Derek?”

“Why can’t I smell anything from this cap?” Derek ignores your question. You notice he does this a lot.

“Um, maybe because I’ve never used it before. I just got it on my way to town. Don’t ask how. Now come on, I’ll call your friends to help you walk up.” You didn’t have to, though, because Scott and Stiles come rushing towards Derek’s side of the car. They open the door for him and help him all the way to his loft. The girls, Allison and Lydia offer to help you get your stuff, but you politely decline, telling them you’ll only bring up your stuff when Derek agrees to you staying with him for a while. Formality is kind of your thing with strangers.

As you reach the loft, you look around to find a spot in the room you’d be most comfortable to sit…or stand. The loft is almost empty of furniture.

“Make yourself at home, Y/N. You can sit wherever you want,” Stiles offers as if the loft was his. You hear Derek grunt at Stiles in irritation. This makes you smile and say, “Thanks, Stiles. I think I’ll actually wait for Derek to feel comfortable with me being here before I could do that,” You say, not really knowing why you just did. Derek and Stiles look at each other in confusion.

Allison comes to your rescue and asks you to sit beside her on the couch.

“So Y/N, what kind of oil was that that you used to wake Derek up?” Allison asks. This makes Derek look at you in anticipation for an answer.

“Nothing special. It’s made of Californian poppies. It should help relax the nervous system,” You answer Allison.

“But Derek snapped out of paralysis. How is that relaxing his nervous system?” Scott asks you. Derek remains quiet in this conversation, but you could tell that he wants to ask you these questions himself.

“Well, the oil helped relax his nerves.” You feel like you just repeated what you said. “If you’ve held his arms a while ago, you would’ve felt his nerves were kind of like frozen. And his brain, despite its activity, almost felt like it was dead. It’s hard to explain it. But the oil helped his physical body. And…the prayer I kept saying until he woke up was what boosted the effect of the oil. As for the force that actually woke him up, it was a surge of energy coming from me,” You explain, and this makes the room quiet, all eyes on you. You exhale sharply. “Somebody please say something,” You say, and you could almost feel like you’re losing your voice.

“Huh,” Lydia sighs contemplatively. “I thought you said you were an Empath. It looks like that’s not all you are.”

“I come from a family of healers. You should see by now how Deaton and I must know each other. And please don’t ask why I didn’t become a vet like Deaton because he and I heal mystical beings differently.”

“Interesting,” Lydia says and breaks her stare from you.

“Now that we’re all up to speed, could you all let me heal in peace?” Derek changes the subject. The pack agrees to this and tries to leave quietly except for Stiles, of course. They wave you goodbye before heading out.

*End of Part 1*

Hope you guys liked it because I had so much fun writing this! Please leave some comments because I’d love to know what y’all think! xx

Read Part 2

Much thanks to @spxderbarnes for the inspiration :)

Tag list:

@jurrasicpork @bojabee @kim-hunter5

P.S. Please let me know  if you want to be added to the tag list. Thanks!

[crowwingedangel]

My journey with deltarune. Spoilers ahead!

So, where to I start? ...I went in fairly blind to this. I saw some fanart was popping up quickly, so I ducked away from the internet and played this yesterday evening/last night as fast as I could to avoid being spoiled... As fast as I could ended up being 5+ hours, almost 6, which is a lot more than the 3 people were saying the game was, but uh... I’m slow at games. So I’ll let it pass, internet... you win this round.

From the beginning, I felt the game was much more... ominous than its processor. I felt this unlined sense of dread and unease through the whole set up intro, and then for a large part of the game play, that remained in the back of my mind. I could kind tell something was gonna go dark... I wasn’t sure when or where, but I just felt something was concerning about things, especially our protag Kris.

Playing the game, I let my guard down... A little. I played it the only way I knew how, pacifist, as that’s the only route I played in undertale. It seemed to work well enough,  I was never forced to fight. And the jokes-... they had me laughing! Just as before, there were a lot of jokes that had me laughing REALLY HARD!

I was home alone, so I was voicing the characters out loud as best I could, making voices for them, which was really fun. I also headcanons Kris as mute (like I did for Frisk) and would often make up inner dialogue for them, reacting in their head to stuff, or thinking what they would communicate with ASL, often to the fluffy boy once something dumb had happened haha. So I had a good time playing! I came to enjoy the characters, especially the more I saw them.  Precious little beans... The story was simple enough, and the jokes and undertale connections were enough to keep me interested the whole time. ...Also the homestuck references... I know they were in there. I saw what you were doing with that bucket, Toby. I saw.

Then there was the post game exploration, getting to see a lot of old faces! ...In an odd unfamiliar way. It was a lot of the same characters from undertale we all know and love, but, not quite them. They all didn’t know each other the same way... It was like this was an alternate timeline? I’m not sure what everyone else has figured out or theorized, but based on playing this blind, this is what I was thinking about the whole time:

So, this Kris... Clearly isn’t Frisk. May share some symbolic connections, but isn’t Frisk. Is Kris connected to Chara? I... don’t know. I was unsure the whole time. I figured either they were connected somehow, or they were kinda the same. (By the end the connection is much clearer, but I’ll get to that.) They kind of seem like a bit of both Frisk and Chara, but also their own person.

Clearly, this isn’t the same timeline from undertale. There isn’t even a mention of the war between humans and monsters, much less the monsters ever being underground. OR if there was, I missed it. I admit, I didn’t see everything in the game. I tried to find as much as I couldn’t but I was rushing a little, as it was getting later in the night than I thought I’d be playing and I had work the next morning. But characters that already knew each other before Frisk came down to the underground in undertale didn’t know each other, so clearly things are different. It’s possibly still the same time-traveling Sans we meet at the end, but I don’t think he sees us as Frisk... At least, I can’t tell so...

But still, it was good to see Sans again, and Asgore being a cute dad was way too adorable. Honestly, I’m unsure if he and Toriel were ever royalty in this timeline... no one ever mentioned it that I noticed. Or maybe I just missed it? It was nice to see them being normal family. (I really enjoy representation of divorced couples still looking after their kids with shared custody, as that’s what I grew up with. Thank you, Toby!) It was also nice to see Burgerpants and to hear Mettaton and all the other little nods... The gravestones made me a bit sad, actually... But all of the other faces, a little more grown up! Good to see you, monster kid!

(Also, was it just me, or was the sound that was made when calling on the cell phone in the darkness the same sound associated with Dr. Gaster? That was a thing, right? I think that sound was him, trying to call from the darkness. I flipped out to that, wondering if he was around somewhere.)

But anyway, it was all and good and cute, especially our fun team!

At the end, going around town, I let my guard down a lot, but I was still a little nervous. Then I went home... I felt like Kris had grown as a character, talking around town, so I had thought... I had thought it went well...

Then...

WHAT THE HELL, TOBY?! WHY DO YOU DO THIS TO US? THIS IS NOT OKAY!

I was very upset. I mean, it’s a good ending for a game, especially a cliffhanger for a first chapter, but it still really upset me.

So, I’m not sure what all the current theories about that are, but like... Is this... like, are we thinking that Chara just stepped in? Like Chara from the No-Mercy ending of undertale, stepping into another world, ripping out Kris’s soul and taking over to end another world? Because that’s what I am interpreting right now, and I’m terrified. And it’s really sad for me, because I didn’t even play the No Mercy route... I only ever played pacifist, so I’m just like, oh no oh no ohnoohnoohnoooooo!!!

Even if that’s not it, bad things are coming. I don’t know if the choices made in the game affected the end or not. Honestly, if by the hinting the beginning let on that this game is about the illusion of choice and that choices don’t make a difference, than maybe it didn’t matter all along. I don’t know. I only know how it ended when I played, I don’t know how it ended for others. I don’t intend on playing it another way though. That’s not how I roll. But I am extremely concerned for everyone in the game going forward into the next chapter, whenever that may be.

So, to wrap up, over all, I really enjoyed it. It was the most fun I had had playing a game in a long while. It felt really good to see a lot of old faces and familiar jokes again, and really nice to see a lot of new faces from this world! It was good and entertaining, and the ending has me both hooked and concerned... If... I have to kill in later chapters, I don’t know if I’ll be able to keep playing. The main reason I played undertale in the first place was because I heard I could play it without killing anyone. That’s... kind of my thing. But we’ll see! Who knows how long it’s going to take, anyway. I’m excited and curious for the future of this, all the same!

Well done, Toby. Well done. And thanks for the free joy and pain, haha!

[mrcarpiio]

Nathan Fillion Weight Loss Is Amazing

  Nathan Fillion an American Canadian actor who's principally known as Castle celebrity seems to have pounds reduction. He's looking better and better every day with his vest as well as his weight-loss. Yes, even he is a famous performer but more gossips about him have already been achieved around nathan fillion weight and fat gain.

This absolutely had been enough time once the trailer of The Rookie period 2 released, enthusiasts were able to find his own body transformation. The matter had been increased from many fans all over the globe once the trailer together with Nathan's new human anatomy transformation has been published. Some'd a awesome reaction although others were worried with their wellbeing. However individuals have curious on did nathan fillion lose weight.

That which exactly was his diet plan?

Nathan Fillion utilizes Twitter to post his videos and photos. So in addition, he submitted nathan fillion weight loss methods on Twitter. As many of his fans accompany him on asking him about how he shed weight during shoots and asks about his diet plans.

Let's discuss a number of his weight loss programs which may even be helpful for you if you'd like to lose fat.

KETO Diet Plan

Keto diet program is just one of those food diet plans which help lower the glucose reserves within the physique. Vitality fats begin to split by making molecules termed ketones which are applied by our own body as food. For Nathan, he helped him to reduce added weight by swallowing fats. In the event you want to lose weight like him you could try this diet regime program plan.

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DASH diet was followed by Nathan Fillion within his weight loss method. Typically DASH means Dietary Approaches to prevent Hypertension which is mainly accepted by blood pressure patients but the person who would like to eliminate weight could additionally get this diet plan effective. Nathan instructed by his own teacher to go on this particular diet program which includes helped him in weight loss.

Plant-Based Diet Program Regime

Normally we could see lots of stars go through the dietary plan plan. Among these, the newcomer start is one. Nathan Fillion restricted monster products for environmental and health reason. He just tried to consume foods like fruits, legumes, vegetables, and wholegrains that's effective for weight reduction.

Besides those food diets, the actor also mentioned he averts crap foods of course if you'd like to work in your own weight that you can attempt his diet out plans that can be effective for you personally.

What has been the lovers' precise reaction in direction of his fat reduction?

The sudden weight loss of Fillion produced lots of fans crazy about him. Fans actually liked his fresh transformation when they saw the trailer The Rookie year two. But not everybody appreciated his weight transformation. When he submitted his transformation weight on Twitter, Twitter exploded with tons of tweets and replies from his fans.

Some fans were really amazed to watch so they might not be stopping tweeting about it. They explained just like Dang friend, looking pretty trimming," 1 wrote. "Damn, there's much less Nathan this time WTH," another added. "Dude, you have clearly lost weightloss. I am jealous," the next one came.

Many people experienced different views on his own weight loss. They did not love it much. One thought that he is smashing regardless how much he physically changes. In addition to it some said he looked older for the weight loss. Plus some had been concerned about his overall health state.

What was the main reason because of his transformation?

Fillion has been silent along his conversion which seems as though he had not felt much of slimming down reduction. Although tweeter burst due to his transformation he did not mention he had to do it. Rather throughout his solitary meeting , he said that he was running while playing the role in'The Rookie' however nobody expected that much change within his burden would occur in the brief span of time.

It's theorized he had the transformation for developing shape to depict that the personality behind its newest DC comic picture" The Suicide Squad". Whatever may be the reason for his weight-loss but Fillion never ever neglects to divert fans out of his talent and acting. He gets the shape precisely what the job demands him.

We might learn from Nathan's fat reduction travel that if we hard work and possess dedications in the direction of our work could be impossible to realize. His weight reduction journey can possibly be regarded as a case. He is a wonderful inspiration for all of you who want to get rid of the pounds. It's possible to start now and you will wind up at a fantastic shape so on.

[lowat-golden-tower]

Like Them

Yo guys! I warned you I’d be back with oneshots. I’m in a writing groove again, and I have a bunch of ideas to let loose. Prepare yourselves. This is the first of many.

So @alcordraws has been doing amazing stuff about Markiplier’s egos for ages now. Love’em. Go follow’em. Right now.

Anyway, I got a lot of inspiration from them for these oneshots. Their theorized relationship/history between Dark and Host is just enthralling, and led me to believe “Out There” from Disney’s The Hunchback of Notre Dame would be a fantastic scene/song for them. So I wrote it.

I also parodied the two halves of the song, though the first half shared by Dark and Host was already so spot-on you might not even notice much of a difference. It’s crazy.

So yeah. If you like the egos, and you like Disney, give this a read! And keep an eye out for more. :D

AO3 Mirror

It had only been about a week since Darkiplier brought the Host to Egos, Inc. One week back amidst civilization (somewhat), this time around without his eyes. Adjusting to all of the people and the buzz of activity was... difficult, to say the least. Host had admittedly spent the first few days curled up in his new room of the building: an old library none of the other egos had shown interest in. Host had few personal belongings besides his books, his bat and his violin to fill the minimal space. He didn't mind.

It was quiet. And dim. And no one except Dark ever came there. He was left alone to wallow in his regrets and sorrow, in the endless blood dribbling from his empty eye sockets and the constant visions swarming his head. Dark had taken the time to let Host adjust before bringing him to the headquarters, but still he felt so out of depth with his new abilities.

He missed his eyes. Though the power he now held was greater than ever before- perhaps even greater than Dark's- he had to wonder if the cost was worth it. If sensing the terrified expressions of the other egos, the hurt and disappointment on one pink mustachioed ego, was worth that superiority.

Dark certainly seemed to think so. He didn't enjoy Host's brief, quietly mumbled requests to see the other egos more, to get to know them beyond the meetings. He didn't seem to appreciate Host's interest in anyone but him. Or the Host's desire to acclimate himself to this cruel, confusing new world.

No, Dark only seemed to appreciate and show interest in the Host focusing his attentions and efforts on him and him alone. It was late one night at Egos, Inc. when they had another one of their "talks." Really, it was more Dark scolding Host than anything. If Host spoke up at all, it would merely be a hesitant mumble. Or verbal compliance. Tonight was no different, as Dark circled about him with irritation rolling off his greyed features.

Host had mentioned to Dark how Wilford was looking for someone to host the new radio show they would be testing out, a companion of sorts to the Markiplier TV scheme. He'd confessed to showing interest; to having an outlet for his stories and visions. Perhaps, even, using it as an opportunity to better fit in with the other egos, since he was to be living among them.

Dark hadn't liked it. Dark hadn't liked that suggestion at all, and he didn't hesitate to remind Host of exactly why it was such a terrible idea. His aura crackled and rang in the Host's ears as he began to speak, his deep voice lilting and almost soothing in a way that could only make one's skin crawl.

"The world is cruel, the world is wicked. It is I alone whom you can trust in this whole building. I am your only friend."

Chilled fingers swept over Host's shoulder and he shuddered at the frozen sting they left behind, even through his coat. He gathered it closer about him, feeling the temperature drop in the room. He had no doubts his breath could be seen in the frosty air.

"I, who kept you, taught you, fed you, dressed you. I who look upon you without fear. How can I protect you, Host, unless you always stay with me? Away from them."

Dark stepped up behind the Host, resting both hands firmly upon his shoulders. The frigid burn had been lessened, but now a harsh weight was applied, steadily pushing the Host down, down, down into the dark depths of the crackling aura and his own blinded mind. Static filled his ears until Dark's rumbling tones were the only thing he could hear. "Remember what I told you, Host. You are deformed."

"I am deformed." The words came soft and hushed to Host's lips as he licked them, recalling Dark's statements as his only clarity through the haze.

"And you are deadly."

"And I am deadly."

"And these are crimes for which the world shows little pity. You do not comprehend."

"You are my one defender."

Host swore he felt Dark's sinister, pleased smile at his back. He did so enjoy when his puppets knew their placed and played along to the jerk of his strings. Yet, at the same time, Host knew Dark was right. Dark was the only ego he could without a doubt trust. Dark had saved his life. The others were a mystery; a danger; a threat.

"All of them revile you as a monster." Dark sneered.

"I am a monster." Host's tone was resolved; defeated.

"All they'll do is hate and scorn and jeer."

"Only a monster."

"Why invite their calumny and consternation? Stay with me."

Dark finally released Host's shoulders, but the cold which had gathered there lingered. It clung to him, making it feel as if all that weight which had been pressed upon him was still being applied, even as he felt Dark step around to his front. He knew their eyes would be locked, if Host had them. Small blessings.

"Be faithful to me."

"I'm faithful."

"Grateful to me."

"I'm grateful."

"Do as I say..." Dark reached out to grasp Host's chin and he went stock still with fear, his breath catching in his throat. "Obey..." Host could feel Dark's cold breath fanning across his face as the other ego leaned in to cement his "lesson." The mental image his narrations conjured up terrified him. "And stay with me..."

"I'll stay with you." Host's head dropped as Dark released his face, another cloudy breath leaving his lips. "You are good to me, Dark. I'm sorry." The apology was barely above a whisper, but Dark heard it. He was satisfied- for now.

"You are forgiven. But remember, Host." Dark moved to cradle Host's cheek in his palm. It was a faux show of tenderness, and all it did was leave tiny ice crytals dusted along Host's skin. "I am your sanctuary." Dark's hand slid off his cheek, and with that their little "session" was deemed concluded. He turned his back on Host without a second thought and left him alone in his library of solitude.

Demeaned and demoralized, Host remained slumped where he stood. The temperature in the room would return to normal soon enough, but he knew the chill residing in his veins and within his heart would take longer. The library was silent beyond the sound of his own breathing.

"My sanctuary...."

Slowly, Host turned away from the door, retreating deeper into the room. He ducked among the shelves and books where their musty scent made him feel safe. It was warmer there as well, tucked away from the influence Dark had been exerting. Releasing another hushed breath, Host began murmuring to himself, allowing his hand to run across the spines of so many books he could no longer see.

"Safe behind these bookshelves and these words that I have sown, Gazing at the others from a distance. All my life I watched them as I hid out there alone, Uncaring for their histories or substance."

Host paused to pull a particular book from the shelf. He didn't need to see it to recognize it as one of his own. All of his books had been made with a piece of himself; a piece of his soul. Just being in their presence felt like home.

"All my life I'd memorized the stanzas, Never once an offering of quittance. All my life I'd wonder how it feels to pass a day, Not far from them... But part of them..."

Clutching the book in his hands like a last life line, Host left the shelves, returning the major empty space of the library. He had to pass through it to reach his own personalized corner, but his mental gaze caught the door as he shuffled past.

"And like them, Living in the sun. Give me one day like them, All I ask is one, To hold forever..."

Nonsense. Host wasn't like them. He was different. Created by Mark, but then fabricated to be different... changed... irrevocably twisted. He was chained to Dark and all of them could see it. There was no place for him. No place, except by Dark's side.

"Like them, Where they all live unaware. What I'd give. What I'd dare. Just to live one day like them..."

Oh, how part of him wished, though. How it thought and wondered and conjured ideas of what it could be like. Hanging around, joking and laughing, sharing stories and ideas to garner more attention from Mark's fans. No. No, surely Mark's fans would want nothing to do with him. He was merely a tool. A means to an end.

"With them, Among the androids and the show hosts with their fans, Around the doors and corners I can sense them. Every day they shout or laugh and go about their lives, Heedless of the gift it is to be them."

Host stopped short of his desk area, head dropping forward again. His fingertips ran across the cover of his book; worn and frayed but well loved.

"If I were there with them, I'd treasure every instance."

He shook his head and forced his feet to move. Only a short distance to his desk, and then he could sink down into his chair. Here, alone with his books and with his visions, was where he belonged. Not with them. Never with them. Yet...

"Like them, Strolling through the halls. Taste the freedom like them, Like regular egos, Who freely walk With mayhem."

Oh, wouldn't it be nice. Wouldn't it be a sight to see? If he could see. No, there was no fighting it. No fighting Dark. It didn't matter what he wanted. The other egos were scared of him, they thought he was a monster, and attempting to interact beyond the minimum necessary was... a bad idea.

Still...

"Briefly part of nonsystem, I'll be content Requiem. Won't resent, Stratagem, Blind and bent, No problem."

It would be nice. Host hunched over his desk, still clutching at his book, his knuckles a bone white. Blood was streaming freely from his broken eye sockets, soaking his bandage. He would need to change it. Again.

"I'll have spent one day like them."

Hushed and buried away, alone in his library, not for the first time... Host wept.