#I may be a simple lesbian but I used 2 date men and also pretty much all my friends are men

[rrr-is-gay]

Hello kids, today I’d like to preach to you about the deep eroticism of The Fight, because warriormale literally lives in my mind and compels me to speak.

When Ram and Bheem wrestle outside the governor’s palace, they are releasing so much sexual energy, it’s actually insane. Hell, even before the wrestling, when they’re exchanging punches, there’s this sizzling tension that they’re both too heartbroken to actually think about, but it comes out subconsciously, in how their bodies react to each other. Bheem takes each punch standing up, then fuckin smacks the shit out of Ram, knocking him to the ground, showing his dominance. Ram whips his head to the side to LEER at Bheem before deciding his next attack.

And what is his next attack? TO CLIMB UP BHEEM’S THIGH and THROW HIM TO THE GROUND so he can MOUNT HIM. Bheem does not kick out of this hold or push Ram’s body away, he ROLLS OVER, TANGLING HIS LEGS with Ram’s, keeping him close. He refuses to go on the defensive, he must stay on the attack, to overpower Ram with the strength of his thighs. This need, this primal masculine aggression, is shared by both men as they continue rolling over each other. It is such an intricate ritual!

They are so deeply, intimately familiar with each other’s bodies. Think of how Bheem yanks open Ram’s legs so he can get right between his thighs. He knows where Ram bends and folds. He’s been here before. Think of how Bheem shoves his hand over Ram’s face to hold him down, covering his lips and nose, feeling his heat and insisting upon his submission. Think of how Bheem LIFTS RAM UP dirty-dancing-style to twirl him around, embraced by his thighs, testosterone spiking like adrenaline.

There’s a raw physicality that is shared between sex and combat that’s difficult to describe to those who don’t feel it. It is so primitive, so base, it defies logic. Ram and Bheem have absolutely no reason to be turned on during this fight. They’re both utterly heartbroken, to a point where they’re basically dying inside. And yet their bodies tingle with desire; the desire to touch, smack, yank, bite, grab, hug, roll, spread, fuck. They can’t help it! That’s why they fight so close and tight, because the magnetism pulling them together is stronger than the betrayal tearing them apart.

Absolutely nobody on this earth can convince me that I’m wrong!

[sneezemonster15]

I find it so funny when people try to dissuade people from shipping same sex pairing by using the "We need more representation of close and intimate male friendship. People need to stop making everything gay" excuse. But the reality is that the friendship who is truly under representated is male/female friendship. Ask anybody if 2 guys can be friend? Of course! Ask if 2 girls can be friend? Obviously! Now ask if a a guy and a girl can be friend? "Well, hum ... not really ... the guy probably want to fuck the girl if she is pretty ... the friendship isnt real." Clearly society lacks representation of healthy male/female friendship. Tv shows, anime etc ... give the MC a whole harem of girls (girls who are supposed to be just friends and he thinks of as only friends at the beginning) pining for him or love the trope of the good guy friend who is waiting for the girl to stop dating assholes and finally notice him. Which also lead to the gay best friend trope bc its the only guy who can be the girl's friend.

Representing male/female friendship not only help against heteronormativity but also misoginy. The idea that women arent fun to be around and are boring perpetuate the thought that women are just good at being fucked, at being wifed etc, and not fun enough to just have a good time doing friends stuff ... So men end up thinking they can only return romantic or lustful feelings toward women.

All that to say that those people clearly do not care about friendships representation. They are just annoyed that people prefer same sex pairings to the holy straight pairings. And "feminist" women who cheer because their queens finally got to get the dicks they wanted are advocating for the wrong thing. Celebrating their faves girls being used as sequel factories or for disney happy ever after the heteronormative and misogynist society craves so much, isnt the big flex they think it is.

Well said anon.

Yes, I agree there is a dearth of healthy and realistic m/f friendships in media and they are surely underrepresented. Lately, more creators are portraying m/f friendships in their films/series etc. But yeah, it's such a stereotypical thing to reduce m/f relationships to romantic or lewd isn't it?

I liked how the character of Amy in Gone Girl talked about the Cool Girl trope. How men wanna see women they wanna hang out with in a certain way and outwardly, it seems this is a fun girl, with a free, liberal and casual devil may care attitude yet still have their personalities revolving around the desires and fetishes of men. I also liked how again, the character of Amy in a film called Chasing Amy portrayed a similar issue, even though the film has its own problems. How men see lesbian women and even though their sexual interests don't intersect, men nevertheless feel righteous about constructing sexual fetishes around it, objectifying lesbians because women, by the simple grace of being women, simply cannot do without men, that their whole existence is nullified if men aren't in it.

A male/female relationship which is platonic and based on equal terms can do so much to give some resolution to this issue.

As for the 'feminist' fans in this fandom, it is interesting to see how Sakura or Hinata stans think cheering their faves is a holy act of feminism while understanding nothing about feminism and female representation in media. It has created such a toxic environment in this fandom, and I am sure others. To a huge extent, I blame the industry because the target group of this genre is so impressionable, it's so easy to misinterpret things, especially with how these women are written. While I get why Kishi did it with these two female characters, given they would be paired up with his two main (and clearly gay, living in a homophobic world) characters for the sake of the sequel and that he writes other female characters much better than theirs, it still is very problematic. Because they were never condemned in the actual story. They were never called out. Never made to face consequences for their actions. And this, THIS, makes their fans so insistent about the apparent goodness of them, while sweeping the rest under the carpet. While it doesn't take a genius to spot their faults, it certainly takes a certain level of understanding of narrative, visual language, themes and understanding of the world.

I can talk about narrative subversion till my lungs give out but unless one shows an inclination to learn how narratives are built, they would keep sticking to their token understanding of concepts such as representation and feminism. Which is such a sad phenomenon. It is almost hurtful how so many fans are so willingly tone deaf and blind, all because of some shallow relationship they wish they had. It's amazing to me how well fortified their delusions are. How strong their willingness to be courted by a hot popular boy. How fine they are with having their fave character revolve around some guy for the most superficial of reasons. This is what their understanding of feminism amounts to. All this nonsense for some cheap self insert.

Even Sasuke stans who are anti SNS. They prefer thinking of Sasuke as some cool, badass, revolutionary man archetype who sleeps around and struts with his massive dick out. And this is how they facilitate their Sasuke*fem reader smut. These Guevara extremists who think homosexuality only exists in western societies, who also consider themselves uber feminists, who think Sasuke casually slept with Karin (because why wouldn't he? He is a man and he has a dick and a willing girl is around, it all makes sense lol), are fine with self inserting into a female character, as long as the badass revolutionary would casually fuck her and then throw her away or let her die without a second thought after his demands have been met. Because yay, feminism. Like irony goes to anti SNS and SS/NH to die a horrible death.

Hinata stans would get triggered at SNS posts or anti NH posts and share the same four Spanish panels of photographs of Naruto with his family because that's their understanding of a happy family. Orchestrated studio pictures. Because gay men living in a het marriage have never been clicked. Because gay men in het marriages don't exist. That's their extent of understanding a relationship. A family picture. It is certainly not a flex.

Just look at how SS apply all sorts of mental gymnastics to justify Sasuke staying away from his family for 12 freaking years. Like you can certainly feel bad for SS stans who even after Gaiden, had the courage to ship this ship. The levels of desperation. And to what ends? What is even their payback? Where is their reward? Kishi certainly isn't giving them any.

You know sometimes I feel shipping is a strong word for what I feel for the story. Because Naruto is just a love story about two boys. If I want them to be together, is it shipping? Shipping is such a fandom term. If that's what the story has led me to, to hope for the two main characters to have a resolution that the entire narrative has painstakingly led me to, is it really shipping? I am just an ordinary reader/audience who wants a good ending to this story. The way the creator wrote it. All I did was to follow what he wanted me to see. Is it then shipping or just a natural conclusion to the story? To want them to be with each other?

As for those fans who say 'we need more representation of men being friends, stop making everything gay' are so fucking silly. Like damn, don't we have enough representation of platonic male bonding? There are entire tropes based on that dynamic. Cop buddies, bro code, band of brothers, big brother mentor, bromantic foil, bros before hoes, brother from another mother and this goes on and on and on. I can count like forty films and twenty books off the top of my head that use these male bonding tropes. Just say you are a homophobic piece of shit. Why circumvent facts? Like we live in a patriarchal, heteronormative world and suddenly stories about men being friends are in jeopardy. Like c'mon, cut the utter bullshit. Lol.

There are only a handful of sane voices in fandoms. Because the rest of them leave and I totally understand why. Hehe. But while you are here, do what you can and then get out. This shit is not good for anyone long term.

[irwinkitten]

got lucky | c.h

requested by anon: ok so for the bi!reader concept: last year i ended my relationship w this girl the main reason was because she was really insecure and jealous especially about me being bisexual like anytime i would talk to a guy she would just get so upset about it and she would make such gross biphobic comments and at the time i had so much internalised biphobia that i tried to convince myself i was gay n stayed in the relationship longer than i should have because i rly liked her i guess lol anyways (1/4) we ended and a while afterwards i started seeing this guy who i’d known of for ages (friends of friends type situation) but we just never really talked before or hung out but from the first date we clicked and the sex was crazy good like the type of sex were ur ditching ur vibrators cuz he’s that good lmao so one weekend we went to this party together and of course she is also there, i was so surprised and i could see her eyeing us the whole night, so when she came over i was anxious af (2/4) and this guy knew i was bi! it was no secret, i worked really hard to accept myself! so she comes over and she deadass goes “are you straight now? i knew you would end up with a man!” and she’s all smug but also hurt and im standing there like what the fuck and THEN this dumb man goes “ha guess the sex is so good i made her straight again” and i’m literally about to cry over how gross the whole interaction is and im so shocked i can’t even defend myself, i dumped him that night obviously (3/) last messgae: so basically can you pls do a redo of the gross situation where instead of being with that dumb guy its with calum and he is so protective n sweet n NORMAL n encourages u to stand up for urself about bisexuality / your sexuality, because what happened to me happens too often and its disgusting and gross and no one deserves that!! only if u feel comfortable/inspired tho, no pressure!! love u laura, thank u for creating such a safe space for all the queer babies it means a lot 💘 notes: i kinda enjoyed writing this one esp for my sweet anon baby. i love u and i hope this is everything you wanted ♥  warnings: biphobia, implications of emotional abuse

word count: 3.2k

donate to my ko-fi here

-

“Hey what’cha doing sweets?” Calum’s voice pulled you from your musings, your hand idly tracing patterns against the paper but the pen remaining on the desk. You wrenched your thoughts from the spiral you seemed to have fallen down, a smile crossing your lips as you felt your heart flutter at the sight of him.

“Nothin’. Just thinking.” You finally replied as he pulled up one of the spare chairs next to you, the bustling activity of the coffee shop falling into your background noise as his thigh pressed against yours.

“Really? Normally you doodle when you’re just thinking.” He countered with ease and your eyes dropped to the paper, noticing that the pen remained where you’d placed it when you first sat down. Subconsciously you must’ve realised that the route your thoughts had gone were not suitable to put down on paper, your fingers picking up the pen and mind falling blank immediately.

“Oh.” You breathed before placing the pen back down and packing away the pad and pen.

“What’s running through your head, doll?” Calum’s voice was quiet and concerned, you shrugged.

“Just, a lot on my mind is all. You’re not my keeper just because we’ve slept together.” You admitted quietly and he frowned before picking up his bag and for a sinking second you thought he was going to walk off, but instead, he took your bag from your hands and slung it over his shoulder. 

He looked back at you expectantly and you sighed before standing up, leaving the coffee shop with him, your eyes on the floor as you fell into step next to him.

“Your place or mine?”

“E’s gonna be home and I don’t want to hear them rant about me bringing people back.” You muttered and Calum nodded. 

“I think Ash is out. He’ll probably head out to Luke’s if I show up with you.” At his smirk, you rolled your eyes fondly before shoving him towards the bus stop. His indignant “hey!” was only ignored as you two waited for the bus, his arm slung over your shoulders.

Selfishly, you leaned into his touch, trying to ignore the fact that your stomach was doing flips at his touch alone. 

The bus journey was a quiet ten minutes, but Calum seemed to understand that you weren’t willing to talk with so many people around, so he was content to just keep you close, and you were unwilling to pull away until his stop came up.

When you reached his shared house with Ashton, you noted that the car was gone from the driveway and Calum smirked.

“Looks like he’s out. C’mon.” His hand tucked around yours and pulled you inside. And for a second you wondered if you could distract him with sex, but then the guilt appeared and you could feel the tears of frustration appear as your thoughts swirled and you felt dizzy.

Calum had stepped ahead, turning to see you stood leaning against the closed door, head in your hands and he knew something was wrong. Stepping back to you, he dropped your bags and took your hand in his, pulling you upstairs to his room and your stomach twisted uncomfortably.

“Cal I-”

“I’m not suggesting that.” He muttered. You fell silent at that and as he pulled you into his room, you felt unsure, but he gave you no chance to really deny him as he crawled into bed before opening his arms out to you.

“Cal.”

“I know you. You don’t do emotional stuff well but I’m here for a cuddle and an ear if you need it.” You fell into the embrace easily, your head resting on his chest as his arms wrapped around your shoulders, his lips finding your temple as you finally felt something in you snap, the surge of emotions overwhelming and frighteningly vivid. 

“I keep telling myself that I never was a lesbian, that I still found men attractive but Poppy made me feel like having that attraction was stupid since I was dating her and that I was a lesbian and it’s so fucking confusing because I like you, but I can hear her voice screeching that I’m not right, that I’m a lesbian or faking it or a freak.” And for the first time since you left Poppy, you cried.

Calum had been waiting for this. When the split had happened, you’d been ready for it, you’d already left her mentally, but this was what he knew you needed. He knew that the relationship with her had been toxic, but you’d never revealed the extent of her behaviour. 

His heart broke.

“Just because you like both men and women does not mean you should feel so guilty over your sexuality. There’s a B in LGBT for a reason, doll. That’s you. You’re bisexual and you should be proud of that, not ashamed because some bitch with a control issue couldn’t handle the fact that you liked more than women.” 

You found yourself gripping his shirt with your fists as you pressed your face into his chest, trying to stem the tears that seemed relentless. But Calum held his silence whilst you got it out of your system, knowing that you needed to get this off your chest. 

“I’m sorry.” You finally got out, but he simply shushed you. 

“She was a shitty person with an attitude to show. You shouldn’t apologise for the bitch.” His words were simple but it gave you a breath of ease, pulling away as hands rubbed your shoulders gently. 

He was definitely too good to you, but he was there for you regardless and you were certain that you loved him for that.

“There’s gonna be a party on the other side of town in a couple of weeks. Ash took over the old Firefly down on Hartley. He’s revamping before opening the bar to the public. You fancy going?” And you smiled at the gentle distraction he was offering. 

“We get at least a free drink if we show up, right?” And Calum laughed as he kissed your temple. 

“He wouldn’t say no to me. Or you. In fact, I’m almost certain he’s expecting me to do full introductions on that night since Luke and Mike will be there with the others and their girls.” You rolled your eyes. 

“It’s not like I went to school with Luke or anything.” Came your sarcastic retort and Calum laughed as the two of you settled for the evening. 

“Pretty sure Luke last saw you when you started dating Poppy. He’s put two and two together but he won’t say anything unless you mention it. Even then he knows it’s not his place.” Your heart seemed to swell another size in affection for Luke. 

“You’re making it difficult for me to not fall in love with you Cal. Good dick, you know how to use those lips and fingers of yours, you make me feel like I belong and you respect boundaries without me having to ask.” You finally muttered and Calum gave you an almost wistful smile. 

“You may have been with Poppy but that didn’t stop me from being friends with you. You’re someone I’ve genuinely cared about from day one. Not gonna chuck that away because of who you are. Plus growing up with my mom and sister almost made certain I’d be in touch with my feminine side.” He teased but the sincerity and understanding in his tone eased your shoulders. 

Your features softened at the admittance and you pressed a kiss to his cheek.

“Then I definitely got lucky to have you in my life at least, falling in love or not.”

—

When the day of the party rolled around, you felt sick with nerves and you couldn’t understand why. 

When Calum rolled up to pick you up—he was driving to Luke’s who lived closest to the bar and you’d both get a ride back to yours before he picked up his car the following morning—he could see the nerves and the grimace on his face spoke volumes. 

“What?” You all but demanded when you were debating outfits. He’d been sitting on the bed watching, but got up and held his hands out to you. 

You took them hesitantly. His thumbs almost immediately started to soothe across the back of your hands to help relax you. 

“Word has gotten around that Poppy is planning to show up. We haven’t exactly been quiet about our relationship, but I didn’t think she’d pull something like this.” And your stomach churned uncomfortably. 

“We’re still going. Ashton promised free drinks and we’ll be in the VIP area right?” You checked and Calum nodded.

“Ashton has already told the bouncers that she’s not allowed near the VIP section. They’re checking and rechecking the lists to make sure she isn’t on one of them.” He explained and you let out a breath of air. 

“Okay. It’ll be fine. It’s being handled and I’ve got you. Now which outfit do you think I should wear?” He studied your face for a second before a smile broke across his lips. 

“The dark purple with the deep plunge. Is it wrong of me to flaunt in her face what she lost?” And you laughed as you kissed him. 

“I mean, yes. But I also know that you want to show me off properly now that we’ve got things really settled.” You murmured and he grinned back unabashedly. 

It was still an uphill battle, but he’d given you a lot to think about. And after gentle convincing, you’d found an LGBT friendly therapist who helped you process your thoughts. It helped you come to terms with accepting the toxic relationship that you’d been in but also it highlighted how beneficial Calum had been as a friend and confidant. 

It also gave you the courage to ask Calum out officially, wanting to be with him entirely and not just in the evenings. 

He took that in his stride and things shifted once more between the two of you. When you opened up to him about some of your sessions, you knew that your trust had been well placed because he never indicated anything to his friends and so you were never subjected to pitying stares or glares. 

You were almost sure that you’d fall in love with him faster than you fell for Poppy. 

The drive to Luke’s was filled with your nerves. You hadn’t seen Luke in years and you were also meeting his two other friends, Ashton and Michael as well as their partners. 

“Ashton’s excited to finally meet you and stop telling me to be careful when I go to yours.” 

Despite Calum living with Ashton, your schedules never seemed to match and more often than not, Calum could be found at your place, a small sanctuary from your hectic lives. 

Ashton never begrudged that time you shared together, but Calum had mentioned a few times about how snappy he was being on the subject. 

“He’ll chill when he realises I’m not out to break your heart or steal something.” You muttered with a chuckle. Calum snorted in return as he pulled into Luke’s driveway. 

Your nerves return full force as he pulls you to the front door and steps in like he lives there. 

“Hey fuckers, anyone about?” He called through and was met with calls of confirmation, another yell following that they were in the dining room. Your fingers squeezed Calum’s tightly and he didn’t hesitate to return it, his thumb soothing across the skin on the back of your hand.

“Look who it is!” A voice crowed loudly as he stepped into the dining room, followed by loud calls of greetings. 

There was a flurry of introductions and you felt like the spotlight was being shone on you, under scrutiny from his best friends gazes once they had greeted their friend and Calum had introduced you. Or re-introduced you in Luke’s case.

“Well c’mon, the last time I saw you we were leaving school. What’s been happening to you?” Luke finally asked, indicating to the seat next to him. A small smile graced your lips as you sat down, Calum falling into the seat next to you as you shrugged. 

“Life I guess? It’s been definitely more interesting with the different jobs and moving about. Building up a social life again.” Luke’s face filled with a frown at that. 

Michael came in next. 

“Building up a social life? Did you not have one?” His words held an innocent curiosity, yet you felt yourself hesitate. 

“My ex was controlling to the point that I couldn’t do anything without their permission. They managed to make me believe that no one really wanted me around and I lost touch with old friends, like Luke.” You glanced to the side and he was frowning. 

The others held varying degrees of stunned shock or disapproval. 

“Well then he was a cunt.” Michael muttered and your eyes refused to meet theirs at the assumptions. Luke stayed quiet but his hand rested on your knee, squeezing it. You shot him a gentle smile in return.

“Well it’ll be good to have you back in our lives. Especially with these two knuckleheads.” He nodded at Ashton and Michael who immediately protested and you laughed. 

It felt like you’d known them for years as you all had a few shots. Ashton, despite being the owner of the bar, wasn’t worried about turning up with his friends. He’d already explained to his staff that he’d be around for the rest of the night once he arrived and he’d told the small groups he’d be here and there. 

After a handful of shots, the group of you made your way to the bar, your arm linked with Calum’s. There were separate conversations happening between you all, their girlfriends including you on their pamper night whilst the boys discussed a possible games night for all of you. 

When you arrived at the club, you saw the queue of people waiting to get in and the subsequent groans from the line as the bouncer let you in, no questions asked. 

Ashton guided the group of you to the VIP section and the music was still loud but you could still hear each other talking. You were chatting away with Luke’s girlfriend, arm still linked with Calum’s as Ashton disappeared to get drinks. 

Calum pulled your attention away briefly, his lips by your ear. 

“I’ve spotted her. She’s not seen us yet so don’t worry.” You barely nodded, acknowledging his words as you listened in, fighting to keep your nerves down. 

The night continued and you were all a few drinks deep. Calum’s arm had barely left your waist all night as you talked and danced and drank. You’d been welcomed into his group of friends with an ease you never realised existed. 

You’d deliberately not tried to seek out Poppy, silently praying that the universe would comply. But as the group of you stood out in the smokers area, huddled together under a heating lamp, your stomach sank as she stepped out, her eyes narrowing on you. 

“Fuckin’ knew it!” You could feel the alarm in your face as you stepped back into Calum, his arm going around you protectively. 

“Poppy, you’re drunk.” You felt curious gazes from your new friends, but you didn’t spare them a glance.

“You break up with me and go running to his arms, I knew you weren’t a fuckin lesbian. Pretending to try it out? Just another straight girl seeking attention. Fucking freak.” She snapped and your stomach sank. 

“Get it through your thick head that she’s bisexual.” Calum snapped in your defence, earning a glare from Poppy. But Calum didn’t shrink from the glare, your glance to his face confirmed he was giving her his own. You were mildly impressed that she didn’t back down instantly. 

“She’s a fuckin liar! Years of my life wasted on this bitch.” She spat at your feet and you took in a deep breath. 

“You don’t get to control me anymore, Poppy. I’ve liked both men and women, but you never liked that because it meant that I had more chances of leaving you. And I wished I’d have left you sooner. Calum certainly thought so.” 

“Of course you fucked the first man to pay you any attention.” Your heart sank once more at her declaration and you felt your mind fall into the old trap that you’d fought with for so long. 

“No she never. In fact she slept with a few girls long before she slept with me. But I was her best friend as she tried to deal with the mess you created in her mind.” Calum snapped back. You felt your heart swell for him. 

Poppy stepped forward, her hand raised but then Ashton stepped in front of you. 

“Get out. You’re no longer welcome in this bar.” He made a gesture and security slowly made their way over. 

“She shouldn’t be fucking welcome!” Poppy yelled back, but Ashton held firm. 

“She is my friend. You are not. Get. Out.” When the bouncer rested a hand on her arm, she shrugged it off and stormed away. Your entire body was trembling.

“So that was the ex, huh?” Michael commented and you could feel your hands trembling as you nodded. “Why didn’t you correct me?” Calum spoke up for you as his hands took yours. 

“It’s been a battle for her. Poppy had convinced her she was a lesbian, that she was wrong for having any attraction to men. In Poppy’s world, either your gay, lesbian or straight. Being bisexual isn’t acceptable in her eyes.” Calum’s arms wrapped around you and you stood there, holding onto him for dear life. 

“Well that makes two of us then.” Michael’s casual comment had your knees go weak and you let out a weak laugh. 

“Thank you Ash.” You finally murmured when you pulled away from Calum. Ashton didn’t hesitate to wrap his arms around you in a warm hug that was both comforting and reassuring. 

“Hey, you’ve been the best thing for my best mate. And you were friends with Luke once before. I’ve definitely got your back. And I get why you didn’t say anything and don’t hold that against you.” He muttered and you breathed a sigh of relief before returning to Calum’s embrace. 

“More drinks or are we gonna go back to Luke’s?” And you shook your head. 

“Let’s stay. I’m not gonna let her ruin it,” you leaned forwards so your lips were by his ear as the others went inside, “also I want to see if we can christen the bar in one of the toilets.” You breathed. Calum groaned as his grip around you got tighter and he pulled you in for a kiss that promised more. 

“Oh you’re so fucked sweetheart. Especially since I know where the individual lips are and they aren’t attended by anyone.” You held back a moan at that thought before pulling away, your hand in his. 

“Dance first?” And the innocence in your tone made him laugh as he followed behind you willingly. 

“Menace.” The term was laced with affection as he caught up to you, kissing the spot just below your ear. 

You simply grinned in return as you pulled him onto the dance floor, Poppy long forgotten as he danced with you. 

-

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[paroxetine-patty]

came across another [metal][orientation] (got a nice ring to it huh, i think that’d actually make a great alternative label) blog just cause they keep tagging their posts with c///o///m/ph///e//t and uh

why do people care so much about labels. i know it sounds “sus” in todays climate, in fact ambiguously so, either anti-progressive (naively egalitarian) or way too radikweer, shroedinger style, lol

but in all honesty, sometimes i have to ask. yes i know from inside the social media bubble it’s perfectly logical that one must define and protect their oppressed identity and personal reality to the t

and at the same time... in the outside world, guess how many people, homophobes and lesbians alike, are gonna care if I 1) never had a crush on a man, 2) only ever kissed a man and had some cuddles but couldn’t get through with the sex, 3) got through with the sex but didn’t like it, 4) married a man and realized that I would be happier with a woman much later?

(you may guess which one is me irl. hint, it’s 2. I wish I stood closer to the left but that’s another issue and like hell I’m gonna blame or annoy Kinsey 6 homosexuals over it, I KNOW that’s my problem, and I should deal with it on my own.) 

or how many women in my dating pool would care (like emotionally, engagingly) if I’m even bi or gay. yes yes this is really discouraging, I know, but in practice, at least in the circles I prefer, it really wouldn’t mean all that much. realistically. “oh but that’s erasure of xyz” - once the topic pops up in a conversation, it will matter to a respectful person, I promise. just like any other personal boundary. and though y’all wouldn’t believe me probably, I AM respectful of gs’ struggles and wouldn’t belittle them or compare them to mine for a bit. I actually tend to warn people about my trait and my past because I understand why and how it might matter for *someone* despite everything I’ve said above. 

 can’t see why I should deny my evident incapability to sleep with males in the meantime. believe me, if they’d come with a reliable explanation for my and many other women’s partially bisexual experience, I’d take it up and wouldn’t hog up the lesbian label. granted, when people independently accepted this general experience as not universally, but pretty characteristically gay, I was both relieved to learn so and confident to accept it myself without fear of offending anybody. now I see that might have been a dubious decision. so I’d like for another... path and community to exist, and my only problem is the lack of a proper term. 

I don’t like bi lesbian mostly bc it’s another predominantly idealistic microlabel born out of the need to include more gender identities. I don’t like bi bc I’m not available to men however I might feel about them. calling myself lesbian while having a persistent romantic attraction to distant/virtual men is problematic, I agree with that. in the end, I prefer late bloomer lesbian and comphet lesbian. this could’ve been offensive but luckily this makes the community self-excluded since gs already equate these with “bisexual” and use them interchangeably - while keeping the lesbian label which in the end is, like it or not, is MORE fitting and descriptive than bi, at least for my own sexuality.

PS although my “peak trans” has been cotton ceiling rhetoric + having hard time accepting cis and trans lesbian experience as one, and it also incidentally led me to understand gs’s point which I’d still be missing otherwise - my own liminal state is also what makes me empathize with trans women who call themselves lesbians (with some understandable reservations eg obvious fetishists). not bc “it’s only fair” or “everyone is valid” but bc my point of reference might not be your point of reference, but we all can recognize when each of us has no other choice, so to speak, when our respective languages are forced by our realities to name the latter a certain way. i don’t believe in universal acceptance of labels for everybody exactly because languages and priorities within one’s reality differ from group to group. but i believe in internal logic of one’s unique mortal existence. you may hate me (or anyone else), I may too, but when I’m one on one with my fleeting life, I can’t see the point in not (keeping on, beside my choice) being a lesbian and not knowing I am one just because I am, objectively, not the cookie-cutter, platonic idea of one. it’s just that simple. and I know you feel the same about your own Self. yet the struggle will continue because language is always more crude when reality, and splitting hairs doesn’t make it better sometimes. 

and this is okay. I hope.

[amemericans]

what anime recs do you have an anime n00b

under a read more because the list is long and we added extra commentary because we’re just that extra

anon i hope you’re happy exposing us for the weebs that we are

j’s sidenote: i usually read more manga but fortunately, some of the ones i read have anime!! 

Shoujo

Cardcaptor Sakura

J: if you’re looking for a magical girl type of anime, this is it!!! kinomoto sakura is precious i hope you love her and her lesbian best friend tomoyo. please don’t watch the US dub “cardcaptors”…it’s an insult.

Yona of the Dawn / Akatsuki no Yona

J: sheltered princess gets kicked out of the castle, is involved in a prophecy, and then lots of action because why not? also i love yona 

Gekkan Shoujo Nozaki-Kun (GSNK) / Monthly Girl’s Nozaki-Kun

J: even if you say you’re an anime n00b, you probably have an understanding of shoujo tropes. too bad this breaks all the stereotypes!! it’ll make you laugh, i guarantee. characters are as clueless as hoshi is with technology and i’m sure all of them will never be in a relationship.

Ao Haru Ride / Blue Spring Ride

J: if GSNK breaks all the shoujo tropes, this one has all of them!!!! even so, it’s still pretty good- i bet you woozi can make a song or two from this anime (though i know his main muse will be full moon wo sagashite- also a good anime!)

Orange

J: slice-of-life anime about a group of friends who try to save one of their own. prepare tissues.

Ouran High School Host Club

J: if you love seventeen and their dynamic, you’ll love this too!! shoutout to my girl haruhi for dealing with all of the host club’s shit.

Your Lie in April

V: A male pianist and a female violinist play music together. also prepare tissues…you’ll understand the meaning of the anime title at the very last episode lol.

Ore Monogatari / My Love Story

J: this is…really…the purest love story…you just have to watch it, seriously…it’s as pure as seventeen adore u, mansae, and pretty u eras

Sports

Haikyuu!! (a personal fav of seventeen!)

J: be prepared to binge watch this because i know i did!! it’s a heartwarming story with lots of nicely-placed (and not forced) comedy. but i mean, it’s volleyball. **seungkwan endorses it**

Kuroko no Basuke

J: has the most cliche shit in a sports anime (i’ve watched like 5 sports anime so idk how accurate this statement is). friendship!!! teamwork!!! ridiculous basketball powers!!! but we can overcome everything when we work hard!!!

Yuuri On Ice!!!

J: ice skating anime. VERY GAY. no queerbaiting here- it’s GAY AS FUCK. you really have to admire and root for our main boy yuuri here though. he is truly a precious katsudon

Chihayafuru

J: at first glace, it MAY look like shoujo, but our main girl chihaya over here is 120% focused on karuta. because who needs boys who are in an unrequited love with you right?? still has the power of friendship and teamwork, which is always a must in sports anime!!

Shounen

Full Metal Alchemist: Brotherhood

J: personally picking this over the earlier version of FMA only because this follows more closely to the canon (manga) storyline. it really does have a wonderful storyline with rich characters and great development and you’ll feel satisfied with the story when you finish it

Hunter x Hunter (2011 but i have a soft spot for the older ver too)

J: this one has a little bit of everything: friendship, teamwork, sports, magical abilities, ~family~ (the main 4 are family don’t fight me on this), beautifully written characters, great storylines, a creepy ass clown,

Bungou Stray Dogs

J: um joshua personally recommended this so you should watch it. MC works in a detective agency that has staff with *abilities*. definitely lots of action. fun fact: the characters are named after famous people in literature and their abilities are named after their work! the first arc of season 2 is a personal favorite of mine

Code Geass

J: basically tells the story of a revolution against the current government. our main boy here, (sometimes douchey) lelouche pretty much leads the revolution accompanied by an ability he acquired- his geass. very mecha and has fighting robots action!!

Death Note

J: an even bigger douche than lelouche, light yagami is out to reform the current justice system by taking it upon himself to play god. someone give him an oscar for his performance honestly this bitch really knows how to act

My Hero Academy

V: high school students with super powers and they go to school to learn how to become heroes! easily became one of my favorite shounen anime. every student is precious except that one grape-looking dude

Shingeki no Kyojin / Attack on Titan

J: we have another hot-blooded male protagonist over here!!! my boy eren just has a simple dream- to kill all the titans that ever existed because they ruined his life!!! is it really too much to ask for?

One Punch Man

J: this follows the story of saitama, who just wants to be a hero and save people’s lives. he’s bored because, well, he’s overpowered. you’ll get a lot of laughs here, definitely

Tokyo Ghoul (the whole show censored the gore but you can find the uncensored version too)

V: Ghouls basically look like humans but their diet is limited to humans and coffee only (they can’t eat human food). The ghouls need to kill humans to eat but humans want to live so they fight back. It shows the story of both sides so you feel sorry for both of them lol…and so my boy kaneki just wanted to go on a date but his life turned upside down after that.

Noragami

J: we’re dealing with the supernatural this time! my girl hiyori suddenly becomes involved with the gods, which is kind of awesome but also awful. also the gods are so very human in the sense that they cause so much shit. you probably don’t want them ruling your planet or something

Parasyte: Maxim

J: in this world, there’s an organism/parasite that invades your body and takes over it, killing you instantly. sometimes, things don’t go as planned, and the parasite and the human have to coexist, guess what happens to our main character….

Psycho Pass

J: in a dystopian future, there’s a technology that actually predicts your probability of becoming a criminal/endangering humanity. that technology in itself is already the problem….

Moribito

V: set in a fantasy, historical Asia. my girl Balsa can easily beat up 1000 men while guarding a child prince. interesting plot, beautiful animation, and an amazing main character!!

D.Gray Man

J: hey there demons, it’s me, ya exorcist!!! demon-hunting adventures with lots of friendship in between and you’ll fall in love with these character i swear!! a+ humor as well honestly i love these kids

Blue Exorcist

V: hey there demons, it’s me, another exorcist! half-human/half-demon boy goes to school to learn how to become an exorcist to defeat demons and most importantly: Satan

Thriller

Erased (We recommend the live action too! it follows the manga more accurately. It’son Netflix)

J: murder mystery where our MC has this ability to rewind time and fix any bad things that were about to happen. one day, he gets transported back and ends up having to figure out on who murdered one of his classmates. really keeps you on the edge of your seat and the music is spot on!!

Another

J: in a seriously haunted classroom, there’s always one extra person who had died but is present with them, every year it’s someone different and the class has to figure out on who the dead one is before……bad things…

Terror In Resonance

V: two teenage boys commit terrorist attacks on Tokyo and they somehow get a girl involved in their crimes

Movies

Kimi no Na Wa

V: JunHao’s My I was inspired by this!!! I don’t want to spoil too much, you just have to watch it! beautiful animation, beautiful characters. the story makes a lot more sense if you watch it the second time.

Studio Ghibli movies

The Girl who Leapt Through Time

[phoenix1966sbottom]

Hello, I hope your day has gone well. Do you know any fics where one of the boys is under a spell of some type? like truth spell, obedience spell, love potion and the like? not fuck or die... I know you only do Sam centered fic but if anybody can give cursed! Dean it would be great too! (so long as he tops)

Please heed the warnings on the individual fics, because some of these are dub-con/non-con due to curses that affect one or both boys and not all end happily! Also, not all of these are “nice” spells, but most lead to confessions of feelings and sex. 

give in by derangerearrangeon Ao3. Sam/Dean. Wincest. Somewhere between Ohio and Michigan, Sam gets hit with a curse. Neither of them is sure what happened—all they know is that Sam shouldn’t talk in public until they get things sorted out.

Don’t Expect Any Miracles by ADeedWithoutaName on Ao3. Sam/Dean. Wincest. While hunting alone, Sam is hit with a curse. Dean knows that he should be completely focused on breaking it, but he can’t help but notice what it’s doing to his younger brother’s body. And how that makes him feel. Set in S1. (no penetrative sex)

Little Creature You Unspun by Exaggerated_Specificity on Ao3. Sam/Dean. Weecest. John inadvertently brings home a cursed book that has eight year old Sam acting out Dean’s wildest fantasies. Marked as non-con due to magically induced reasons for the sex happening. Don’t read if this isn’t your thing.(warning: extreme underage)

The Curse by awabubbles on Ao3. Sam/Dean. Wincest. Sam and Dean discover a strange monster with the head of a human and the body of a fish. But by the time they figure out what it is, it might be too late for Sam.

Let it Ride by dimeliora on Ao3. Sam/Dean. Wincest. While transporting relics from John’s old storage to the Men of Letters bunker the Winchesters lose an item with disastrous results.

Truth Doesn’t Always Hurt by wilddragonflying on Ao3. Sam/Dean. Wincest. Dean gets hit with a truth spell, and the brothers Winchester decide the best way to fix it is to kill the Trickster who cast it.Yeah. Not their greatest idea.Now, they just have to get the curse broken before certain truths come to light.(no penetrative sex, however Sam wants to top Dean at a later date)

The Whole Truth And Nothing But by dont_hate_me01 on Ao3. Sam/Dean. Wincest. After being hit with a truth spell Sam’s forced to reveal some shattering things about himself, including that he was raped and that he loves Dean like no brother should love his sibling, he runs away. Dean manages to find him almost a year later and now his younger brother is addicted to heroin and is into self-harm. Sam can’t believe that Dean feels the same about him and feels like Dean only pities him. Dean has to use a spell on Sam before Sam realizes Dean feels the same and with time and love Dean convinces Sam that they share a special bond.

The Statement of the Great Mint by dimeliora on Ao3. Sam/Dean/Dean. Wincest. Dean’s all outta gum.

Halloween by dimeliora on Ao3. Sam/Dean. Wincest. Dean and Sam are working a case when Sam begins to act strangely. A Halloween Holiday Fic (warning for bottom!Sam purists, the third paragraph has Sam topping Dean. Just skip the one that begins, “They don’t kiss” and it’s like it never happened)

By Your Command by Wincesteriffic Kaz on Ao3. Sam/Dean. Wincest. The boys go looking for a cursed amulet with the power of hypnotism and things go slightly awry, allowing them to make a long overdue discovery about each other. Set in season 1.

Fumbling in the Dark by Wincesteriffic Kaz on Ao3. Sam/Dean. Wincest. A spell steals something precious from Sam and leads to a revelation between the brothers. Set early season 2 Dean/Sam

Lost Without You by Wincesteriffic Kaz on Ao3. Sam/Dean. Wincest.Sam hits a new low and makes a confession. Post 8x06 “Southern Comfort” a little angst and a lot of cheerful naughty. (this is the results of Dean handling the cursed penny)

A Dream is a Wish Your Heart Makes by lordofthegays on Ao3. Sam/Dean. Wincest. After a run in with a witch, she is touched by Dean’s relationship with Sam. She lets him go, but without warning him that she put a curse on him to tell the truth. Some things, though, may be better left unsaid…(no penetrative sex)

On the Way Down by BewareTheIdes15 on Ao3. Sam/Dean. Wincest. The Winchesters have been subjected to a lot of things in the name of hunting, but the result of a spell-gone-wrong on their latest case is still pretty high on Dean’s weird scale. While their father is out searching for a way to undo the magic, Dean’s stuck in a cabin in the middle of nowhere, trying to deal with his bitchy teenage brother and his own increasingly un-brotherly feelings toward him. Who’d have thought Sammy growing a pair of giant bird wings would be the least of his problems?

Where Do We Begin by dimeliora on Ao3. Sam/Dean. Wincest. AU post season one. He wakes in a hospital, missing a limb and all of his memories. They tell him he is Dean Hunt. That his sister died in the accident that claimed his leg. From there he rebuilds with the help of his quirky lesbian neighbors and a homeless drifter named Sam. (warning: there is switching, although there is slightly more bottom!sam)

I Fear No Fate by intrepidheart on Ao3. Sam/Dean. Wincest.   In a small town like Guthrie, Montana, Sam Campbell was prepared to live out the remainder of his ordinary existence as the psychologist for the local psychiatric ward. What he wasn’t prepared for was the newest in-patient completely turning his life upside down. Armed with aggressive tendencies, an inhuman amount of snark and the firm belief that he and Sam know each other, the mysterious Dean proves to be a challenge Sam was never expecting to face. Especially since Sam has no recollection of ever meeting Dean before. (no penetrative sex)

Chosen by hunters_retreat on Ao3. Sam/Dean. WIncest. Sam and Dean go undercover to investigate a series of unusual deaths but find far more than they bargained for in the process.

Devil You Know by HazelDomain on Ao3. Sam/Dean. Wincest. Dean had never been what Sam would call “subtle.” But this was something else.

Small and Beautiful by SamuelBartholdy on Ao3. Sam/Dean. Wincest. Dean is attracted to minors. Dean is also attracted to Sam. Then Sam gets de-aged on a hunt, and Dean doesn’t have nearly as much self restraint as he thought he had.

leeches by lefj on Ao3. Sam/Dean. Wincest. Sam discovers a spell to make everybody forget him. He’s convinced it’s for the best. Pre-Stanford.

Head Case by morrezela on Ao3. Sam/Dean. Wincest. Sam’s husband thinks that he is Sam’s brother.

While These Visions Did Appear by hunters_retreat on Ao3. Sam/Dean. Wincest. John Winchester never does anything in small measure, and he takes the safety of his boys very seriously. A spell is only as good as the man providing it though and when something goes wrong there is no one left to pick up the pieces. No one remembers. Certainly not two young men who wake with no memory of each other or how they ended up in a motel together. The only thing they do know is how to hunt. It’s not as simple as that though, as the two men form unbreakable bonds and take the road to a life they never would have considered and a destiny they never wanted.

A Priori by memphis86 on LiveJournal. Sam/Dean. Wincest. He wakes up half-blind, not able to remember anything. Then Dean Winchester shows up to complicate things. (warning: there is one instance of switching towards the end)

Ashes of Another Life by lostt1 on LiveJournal. Sam/Dean. Wincest. When Sam left for Stanford, he was embarking on a grand adventure in the world of normal. Though hurt by Sam’s choice to leave, Dean kept his distance, keeping an eye on his brother from afar. When their paths finally cross again, Sam has changed far more than Dean could have ever expected. It’s up to Dean to figure out what happened during their years apart. Who is Sam if not a Winchester? Who has Sam become? And is there anything Dean can do to get him back?

Breathe by crimsonepitaph on Ao3. Sam/Dean. Wincest.  Sam and Dean have run into it enough to know that truth hurts. (the sex is ambiguous)

Amnesia by ashley_ingenious on Ao3. Sam/Dean. Wincest. On their way back from a particularly brutal hunt, Dean realizes that Sam has caught amnesia somewhere along the way. He doesn’t remember who they are to each other, or what they do. So when he starts treating Dean like a really hot guy that’s being incredibly sweet, Dean has two choices: He can try to tell his little brother the truth, or……

Tender Threads Exquisitely Finding by Xela on Ao3. Sam/Dean. Wincest. There’s distance between Dean and his brother when he gets back from hell. But time heals all wounds, right? Right. Until Sam goes missing, and Dean’s run out of time.

And the Truth Shall Set You Free by Nutkin on Ao3. Sam/Dean. Wincest. Sam gets hit with a truth spell, and Dean decides to do some digging. (no penetrative sex)

[beimanorthrun-blog]

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[mylifeatwar]

Book 2, Chapter 2, Page 9

Archived Text Follows:

Hey Everyone!

First, sorry for not replying to everyone’s comments as much as I normally do. Things have been hectic at work and other boring excuses.

Now onto things that are actually interesting. Where the fuck did Amalia come from? I don’t just mean her country of origin (The Federative Republic of Salbhaca) but I mean her character from a writing perspective.

So, when MLaW was first starting out, we had forums. Later on we canned them because it was too hard to keep them spam free and forums are already going the way of the dinosaur, hence our comment system. However, when the forums  were still up a user called ‘Lemonade’ showed up and talked about the Bechdel test, which is basically a quick and dirty method of seeing whether or not there are meaningful female characters in a given story.

Now, I’m assuming that Lemonade is female because I’ve never heard a guy open with a discussion of the Bechdel test, but I could be wrong. Either way the comic was still in the intro phase and there was some confusion about where the comic was heading. Betsy-Ray’s antagonistic feelings towards Missy and Lulu-Belle for their attractiveness was supposed to show that Betsy-Ray can be insecure and petty, just like all people. This was also supposed to help set up the revelation that Missy and Lulu-Belle are actually pretty good folks who have their own reasons for the way they dress and act. Lemonade was asserting that our characters didn’t really have a proper voice and that they were falling into old, familiar ruts of fiction. Lemonade asked why I wasn’t trying very different characters.

We went back and forth on this and I asserted that characters different from the ones we had didn’t fit the MLaW-verse and that to request otherwise was unfair to the story we had planned. Not my proudest moment really.

Her reply basically boiled down to “This is fiction. You’re writing about giant fucking robots. This mercenary company could be entirely composed of latina lesbians if you wanted to. You can do anything you want.” I replied to this basically with the fact that MLaW was going to end up being very different from what it was at the moment, but I couldn’t reveal anything because Spoilers. This was kind of a ho-hum response in my opinion. I think really I said that because I didn’t think I could write that characters like that (more on that in a second).

A few days later I was alone and drunk in my kitchen (a lot of my writing revelations happen like this) and I was mulling that exchange over. “Wait a second, why couldn’t I write that character? I’m a writer, making things up is like… all I’m good at”.

Just as an experiment I started trying to write a hispanic, lesbian character within the context of MLaW and Amalia just kind of… happened. Before I knew it, it was very hard to think of MLaW without her.

I think that, at least initially, I was scared of writing a character like Amalia because she’s so different than myself that I’d have no point of reference. This means that she could be inaccurate at best or insulting at worst, which isn’t a possibility I relished. Eventually I just fell back on the things that Amalia and I have in common:

We both like girls (*rimshot*)

We’ve both spent time in unfamiliar cultures trying to fit in

We both use assertive behavior to mask nervousness about social situations

It became a lot easier after that and it made me realize that, in all frankness, I was being cowardly about the characters I was making.

Did I alter anything about the MLaW universe or story to make this character? No, Matt and I intended this to be a mecha comic with a lot of female characters from the get-go because it seemed like a cool idea at the time. Salbhaca was in the MLaW fiction from the beginning and always had a Brazillian/Mayan/1960’s Space Race feel to it

We imported a lot of the forum discussions, I think you can still find that discussion in the archives somewhere (it’s on Page 13). So, while I doubt Lemonade still reads MLaW I can still say “Lemonade, this one’s for you”.

Thanks for reading,

– Luther out

PS: Yes, I realize the humor of having a butch-ish lesbian character whose job title is ‘Bull’. That was not intentional, but fuck it, I’m keeping it.

Comment Text Follows:

Iarei - Poor Amalia, that is some spectacular lack of concerned over personal space. Looks like she’s about ready to swallow that cigaro. I do remember Lemon referencing the Bechdel test in the comments section. It was the first I’d heard of it, and really the test struck me as a bit old fashioned. It only really applies to that one ‘Blondie’ stereotype. (See: Chic Young) If you had a female character that talked about nothing but makeup and clothes that would be another sexist stereotype. If you had a man who is powered by nothing but adrenaline and voltage. . . see where I’m going with this? What’s important is that you have (and I believe you do, have) characters that act consistently according to MANY character traits and/or flaws, rather than falling back on easy/familiar formulas or getting hung up on one trait. Sexuality is both a hugely important trait, and an incredibly private trait, so it can be overdone or crammed into a safe, comfortable stereotype easily. So, for what my opinion’s worth, I think you’ve handled it well, thus far. As much as I love Limbs breaking heads I think I look forward more to your character development. Oh, and it’s amusing to have a character act consistently based on flawed premises. (see: Dizzy’s perspective on Dhuvallian soldiers.) Do you have like, a mini biography to reference for each character when you’re planing out a scene? Ooh! Zat reminds me! I wonder is [REDACTED] is still good or if it’ll turn to crap behind the filter of years of matured (or at least well aged) brain. Sorry, I ramble when it’s 5 am. g’night.

Gillsing -  I don’t see what’s ‘old fashioned’ about the Bechdel test, or how it would even apply to individuals. As far as I’ve understood it, it’s mainly supposed to show how rare women are in a lot of fiction, and not judge the female characters or the work itself, whether it passes the test or not. That thing about ‘talking about something other than a man’ is not there because the women would be incapable of talking about something else, but rather because the story might only care about that part of their lives, so that’s the only thing that gets shown. Again, as far as I’ve understood it. I’m not an expert on the subject. 

Iarei - Just that I interpret that part as stemming from the mercifully dated concept that women exist to support their men. Be good wives / daughters / sisters rather than, as you aptly put it, focusing on other parts of their lives.  

tkg - There is also the issue of the test being woefully limited. When you consider that in a good story a character may change or develop you have to ask when the B-Test is appropriate. More so if such a character changes then is it fair to label a story with the b-test based not on what the major characters become but what they were? Somehow the b-test seems like unnecessary stratification.

Iarei - “unnecessary stratification” Those are some pretty words. I believe I shall steal them and probably misuse them.

Beanman - The Bechdel Test has been described as ‘the standard by which feminist critics judge television, movies, books and other media’ It simply judges if the characters in the story a meaningful to an extent. A film/book/comic ect passes the Bechdel test if: 1.It has at lest two women in it, 2.who talk to each other, 3.about something besides a man I am not certain about this particular conversation as Betsy initially seems to want to talk about men, however she is shut down fairly quickly and on the next page the conversation takes a much more serious tone. Personally I think it passes the test, others may disagree. http://www.mylifeatwar.com/?p=319 This conversation I feel, passes without issue. Again a male character is mentioned but as nothing more than a co-worker and the conversation is certainly not about him. http://www.mylifeatwar.com/?p=432 So I would hope that feminists would applaud the efforts of the MLaW team for portraying meaningful female characters. I know I do.

dwwolf - I told ya’all I saw a pickup line coming up.

Matti - If anybody cares, I know good BattleTech fan fic about two all woman mercenary units working together: http://bg.battletech.com/forums/index.php/topic,12316.0.html No mechas in that story though (no ‘Mechs either), but good read anyway

Killercow - I love this page.

Plaintextman - Most interesting. As others have said, the Bechdel test is a very simple and concise test that can go a long way demonstrating lack of female characters with substance. But it is really inadequate for properly judging fiction. Kind of like the “is it dissipating an unusual amount of heat lately?” test for checking whether a transistor still works. A great way to scan for problems, but it won’t tell you whether the thing’s gain curve is sane or not. Heck, a lot of times the heat is just a normal part of operation. So I might be stretching the analogy a little there, but I don’t believe that ∀x(GendersOK(x)→Bechdel(x)); they say Mulan is an example of a work that fails the test. Anyhow, I read an article the other day with which I can’t disagree: http://www.newstatesman.com/culture/2013/08/i-hate-strong-female-characters . In my opinion, having various gendered/cultured/whateverd characters with proper _agency_ is the most important. And so far I think you guys are doing a good job with MLAW in this regard.

Plaintextman - Hey! That golden dot besides Amalia’s right eye… wireless transmitter or other tech implant? IIRC it was mentioned that Salbhaca has “big plans for space” so I assume they are technologically advanced. Possibly also situated close to Dhuvalia and sharing tech?

nweismuller - It just looks like a facial piercing to me. I’ve seen similar piercings before in Real Life.

Plaintextman - Oh… that makes way more sense. It looked to me like it was flat against her skin until you mentioned that.

Killercow - Yeah, I’m pretty sure it was mentioned in the comments by the author as such.

[itsiotrecords-blog]

http://ift.tt/2t4ZVxC

They have the whole package– money, fame, and beauty. They seem unapproachable and distant because they seemingly belong to another universe to which we are not granted access. The celebrities sell not only their professional skills, but also their own image. How many times did stars do something just for publicity’s sake? As long as the people from the magazines, TV screens and the YouTube videos are representing them positively, the sale is going well; and even if the feature is negative, any news is good news (it’s when they stop talking about you that you have a problem). That’s why everything that can tarnish the luster of their glamor is kept strictly confidential (same as any of us would do in all honesty). We think celebrities are flying above the social norms and trivialities. However, human as they are, nothing human is alien to them and now and then their dirty little secrets are made public. From secret love affairs and weird sexual fantasies to addiction problems and unusual obsessions, fears and personal hygienic habits– our beloved stars have them all. The famous folks might have thought their secrets would follow them to their graves, but forgot that eventually the truth has to come out. And we have it right here.

#1 Shaquille O’Neal’s Thirst For Blood Having a fetish is not something one should be ashamed of– after all, if consented and not harmful, no practice in the bedroom should be considered vulgar or inappropriate; to each his own, right? Yet, Shaq’s fetish makes him the last person you’ll be willing to share your drink with because the guy uses his mouth for the strangest thing. Some years ago, his former wife, Vanessa Lopez, filed a suit against him claiming “invasion of privacy and intentional infliction of emotional distress”. During the trial sessions, Lopez revealed some disturbing intimate facts about the legendary basketball player. When asked if Shaq had any sexual hang-ups, she said that he’d often perform oral on her while she was on her period. Actually, this is a clinical condition which is called menophilia and is characterized by getting sexually aroused by menstrual blood. The fetish-lovers brotherhood, however, don’t care for the Latin name and call Shaq’s drive simply “bloodhounding”.

#2 Russell Brand’s Secret Box Of DVDs If you thought Shaq’s fetish was weird, check out what Russell Brand does for fun when he is alone at home. The eccentric Brit’s looks and reckless behavior would suggest that he is into kinky stuff. After his break-up with Katy Perry, she went to his place to collect some of her belongings and found a box full of unlabeled DVDs. Katy couldn’t resist the temptation and played some of them. What she saw made her eyes pop out of her head. On the home-made videos, Russell was doing what is called “air sex”– fully clothed, he was heavily pounding an invisible partner. This might seem quite an improbable way of satisfying oneself, but it’s actually a thing, which originated and was first documented in Japan. All in all, it’s like playing an air guitar, only with more moaning and more wriggling involved.

#3 Denise Richards’ Girl-On-Girl Experience Most people are used to thinking that lesbianism is monopolized by robust, masculinized ladies who dress in baggy jeans and know how to use a jigsaw and change a tire. Stereotypes, however, are not what they used to be. Especially the ones linked to naughty preferences and practices! Just look at this drop dead gorgeous beauty, Denise Richards! It’s true that her divorce with Charlie Sheen in 2006 attracted more attention and inspired more headlines than her film roles, but although ten years have passed since then, she keeps on surprising us with curious facts about her intimate life. If you have read her memoir The Real Girl Next Door (which became a New York Times Best Seller!), then it shouldn’t come as a surprise to you that she has had a homoerotic experience. It was during an interview with the infamous radio host Howard Stern that she kind of came out, confessing that “a long time ago” she met this woman through friends, and she felt… curious. They were both curious, in fact. She was reluctant to reveal the name of the person, but what is known is that she is also pretty famous and is, in Richards’ own words, “a beautiful girly girl.”

#4 Sandra Bullock’s Foul Face Care Treatment When it comes to maintaining their seemingly ageless beauty, many Hollywood female stars subject themselves to all sorts of absurdly alternative beautifying procedures. Some of them are very expensive, yet effective if we judge by the appearance of the Desperate Housewives star Teri Hatcher. She regularly takes… wine baths. Others are weird, mildly put, like Demi Moore’s method of detoxing– she lets leeches suck her blood. But what Sandra Bullock does beats them all. Miss Congeniality applies hemorrhoid cream on her face because she believes it makes her skin glow. The other effect of the product is that, when applied under the eyes, it decreases inflammation. In other words, the cream, which is in fact a vasoconstrictor, is supposed to reduce puffiness. Actually, it makes a lot of sense, since hemorrhoids are… well… puffy.

#5 Martha Stewart’s Naughty Texting… And Other Things What can be more shocking than catching a whole nation’s, 71-year old domestic goddess in “inappropriate for her age and social status” conduct? Probably only Kim Kardashian becoming a nun. But, of course, there’s nothing inappropriate about a woman, no matter her age or occupation, participating in some Internet dating, as Martha Stewart confessed some time ago. But, if checking hot guys’ profiles still sounds too innocent to be on this list, how about imagining this hugely successful business woman engaging herself in a threesome and sexting with strangers? She must have been really bored living in that 35,000-square-foot residence on Mount Desert Island to take on alternative forms of entertainment. We don’t know how much of the rumors about her romantic life are true, but she herself has reluctantly disclosed that her intensive sexting once led to an actual one-night stand. Good for you, Martha! You give hope to all women who fear there is no fun time after menopause!

#6 Brad Pitt’s Bad Odor Routine His fellow actors and his closest friends always know, without a shade of a doubt, when Brad Pitt was somewhere before them. The stank he leaves behind is so unbearable that the guy’s armpits should be declared weapons of mass distraction. Reliable sources claim that one of the most desirable men on the planet completely stopped using deodorant and soap years ago. Some blame it on the fact that Brad Pitt has become all green, so instead of all those cosmetic products that damage the environment, he uses a natural portion of lemon, water and apple cider vinegar to get rid of the repelling smell of perspiration off his body. It obviously doesn’t work effectively, as many complain about the smell coming from him. Not long ago, his Inglourious Basterds co-star Eli Roth shared some inside the set info, “When he was sweating and didn’t have time to shower, he’d just take a baby wipe and rub his armpits with it.” Our advice: Do it more often, Brad! A wipe now and then won’t harm a forest!

#7 Scarlett Johansson’s Back Seat Fantasy This classy hotness surely appears in millions of men’s dreams. Now, her male fans from around the world have been given another incentive to further improve the quality of their dreams featuring the 32-year-old actress and model. Johansson has recently disclosed that her greatest turn-on is doing it in the back seat of a car. “To me, having sex in a car is sexy, and if I have to think of doing something kinky and crazy, I’ll definitely go for the back seat.” That’s it, people, the mystery’s revealed, and if you get lucky to be around Scarlett one day, do not try to seduce her with expensive jewelry, or fancy meals and wines. Just offer to give her a ride in your car! And who knows? You may get lucky.

#8 Keith Richards’ Weird Act Of Remembrance To His Dad Nobody who started their career in the music business in the 1960s, and I mean nobody, has remained untouched by the glorious days of sex, drugs and rock n’ roll. This is especially valid for the musicians of the legendary rock bands, most of whom have admitted to having consumed all kinds of substances in their time. But none of those are as bizarre as the one Keith Richards of The Rolling Stones is said to have sampled. In 2007, NME magazine revealed that the 72-year-old guitarist once mixed his father’s ashes with cocaine and snorted… him. The veteran of drug marathons is convinced that his father wouldn’t have objected at all, and adds that “he went down pretty well.” Years later, Richards now realizes that being still alive after decades of drug and alcohol abuse is pure luck, and he advises others not to follow in his steps. And definitely to abstain from snorting their parents!

#9 Matthew McConaughey’s Food Fetish Food can be hot not only smeared all over the body of your naked girlfriend who is waiting for you to eat her up. The 47-year-old Oscar winning actor sometimes has to stop eating because he enjoys food so much that he literally becomes aroused. If you wonder how he maintains this super fit slender body of his given that he likes eating that much, the answer is simple– the guy prefers to go hungry than to get turned on. Just imagine how embarrassing it must feel being in a fancy restaurant and get a huge boner over a dish of lobster tails with garlic and chili butter! The actor himself once said to Britain’s InStyle Magazine that when he savors something that feels good on his palate, he gets tingles down his spine which can be so forceful that he needs to stop eating if he doesn’t want to lose himself in blissful ecstasy. Another fetish the star admits to have is the smell of suntan lotion; the one with coconut fragrance draws him the most. “That smell brings back the sweetest memories of women in bikinis,” McConaughey says.

#10 Megan Fox’s Dysfunctional Toilet Habit You look at this girl and you say to yourself, “Wow, she is so perfect that I doubt she is really human!” Well, the devastating truth is that the 30-year old actress and model is not only of flesh and blood, but she is also one of those people you’ll probably find disgusting to live with. She might be a global heartthrob, but as regards her hygienic habits, there’s room for improvement— a lot of it. The Transformers babe very often forgets to flush the toilet. And not only in her own home, but also in other people’s houses! She must realize how repulsive this is because not once or twice has she admitted in interviews that she is horrible to live with. Besides being negligent about her going-to-toilet routine, she is also very messy. “My clothes end up wherever I take them off.” Well, Megan, sweetheart, although you kill in a bikini, we must say, being that untidy is definitely far from sexy!

#11 Robert Pattinson’s Bad Hair Day Every Day It came as a surprise to those who know of Robert Pattinson‘s problematic personal hygiene when he became the face of Dior Homme Eau. Was it a joke? After all, the star from the Twilight series is famous for not being a big fan of showering. He once didn’t wash his hair for six weeks in a row! “I don’t really see the point,” he says. “If you don’t care if your hair’s clean or not, then why would you wash it?” Solid logic, but still, it remains a mystery how he manages to look so awesome and well-groomed. His sex appeal is something the crew members working with him on a set in Vancouver obviously don’t care about as they can’t stop criticizing him. As one of the anonymous insiders put it, “He stinks. I mean, it’s awful. He never showers, and it drives people on the set crazy.” So much for the cool vampire appeal!

#12 Harry Styles’ Double Trouble Harry Styles from One Direction has four nipples! Of course, it’s not particularly a dirty secret one needs to hide, but to some it may sound like something you wouldn’t exactly brag about either. However, girls thought the two extra nipples looked just great on Harry’s tanned torso when in 2012 paparazzi caught him sunbathing on the board of a luxury boat in Australia. Despite his genetic defect, the 22-year-old English singer doesn’t seem embarrassed at all. Actually, whenever asked about it, he likes to joke that the extra nipples might have belonged to a twin brother, who didn’t make it to the world but left him his nipples as a form of legacy. Probably because Harry finds stripping so liberating (as he claims), his fans think he is dreamy– four nipples or not.

#13 Thora Birch’s Family History In “Showbiz” Nobody can choose their parents and, one way or another, we all have a past we cannot just erase and pretend didn’t happen. Thora Birch‘s professional path was pretty much mapped out from before she was born, as both her parents were kind of in the show business. Indeed, she started acting as a child and even won an award for Best Young Actress Under Nine Years of Age, but her breakthrough role came with the Oscar winning film American Beauty, in which her performance was applauded both by the critics and the audience. Her parents must be very proud of their daughter’s achievements, although the movie in which they both appeared in 1972 is no less unforgettable and covered in more glory than American Beauty. That movie is none other than the adult film classic Deep Throat, and Jack Birch and Carol Conners, Thora’s mom and dad, are former stars of the industry.

#14 50 Cent’s Shameful Bankruptcy It must be really humiliating for someone who has built one’s career on the classical attributes of rap music (i.e. money, bitches, furs, and fast cars) to go bankrupt. And be forced to hide it! In 2015, the former hottest rapper out there filed a statement of his financials in Connecticut bankruptcy court. From the statement, it became clear that Curtis Jackson drained a $25 million fortune just in a few years’ time. The rapper claimed his bankruptcy was a result of some bad business investments (and following lawsuits), but the truth cannot be concealed– back in his best days of fame and glamor, the man kept throwing money around like a maharaja. Although he owned money to creditors and lost a scandalous lawsuit, which stripped him of another couple of millions, 50 Cent kept posting pictures of himself buried in piles of money. When the court asked him to explain this unexpected wealth, he responded it was all fake money. Yeah, as if!

#15 Daniel Radcliffe’s Booze Addiction How time flies! Year after year, we have been so engulfed in following Daniel bringing the magical character of Harry Potter to life that we somehow failed to notice when the child star grew up. And the fact would have continued to escape us if it hadn’t been for his confession that he had a drinking problem, which, however, he beat in 2010. The actor revealed that he’d sometimes show up on the set of Harry Potter still drunk from the night before. In an interview for The Guardian, he said he turned to alcohol to cope with the pressure of fame and potential failure. Although it sounds like a big cliché, it’s actually a common practice among child stars to embrace bad habits. The examples are quite numerous– Lindsay Lohan, Drew Barrymore, Mary-Kate Olsen, Macaulay Culkin… This is how Radcliffe explains the inclination of the young celebrities towards alcohol and drugs, “It’s the pressure of living with the thought, ‘Oh, what if all these people are saying I’m not going to have a career? What if they all are going to be laughing and I will be consigned to a bunch of “Where are they now?” lists?”

Source: TheRichest

[nirah10]

From Jill,

A Christian cousin of mine who is a ‘heterosexual awareness activist’ (yes, he actually calls himself that)   shared the following extract from a blog post of a gay male bartender, who goes unnamed in his blog. (Yes, my homophobic cousin spends his free him trolling gay bloggers and then flaming them.)

Now my cousin claimed this bartender was heterophonic and according to my cousin’s rant was ‘bashing on straight people and traditional marriage and shaming any straight woman who dared to be happy about marrying a man.’

I personally think my cousin is insane and reading into things. But as a lesbian sometimes I may be a bit of a bias judge.

I remember ages ago a debate on here about heterophobia potentially actually existing and of problems with creating LGTB only streets and communities.

So below is the extract my cousin posted.

Do you think my cousin is right? Or is the bartender being reasonable?

I think the bartender is being reasonable. Although to be fair I feel a bit jilted by bachelorette parties. I was at a gay night club a while ago and a pretty young girl started dancing with me. We started making out and she started giggling. I broke off the kiss and saw another girl filming it. Turns out she was straight and had been dared at the bachlorlette party to make out a lesbian. So yeah. I felt humiliated and like they were making light of my sexuality. And thought I never met him, I kinda get where this bartender is coming from.

Does that make both him and I hetrophobic?

So here is what my cousin shared, which was written by a bartender:

‘In Australia same sex couples can’t get married yet. Homophobia continues to be a problem with same-sex couples still risking getting dirty looks and lewd comments by some members of the public. The saturation of heterosexual culture and straight couples  can also make you feel alien, isolated and lonely.

So there is a reason LGTB people want safe spaces like Gay Bars; not just for hooking up and dating but also to be in a space that you know is free of homophobia and full of people who get you, and  get the feeling of being an alien sometimes and are there embrace the chance to be together and feel like part of a community. Community spirit is important and we are stronger together. With LTGB suicide so high, having a space where you are surrounded by people who know what you are going through is important and after a hard day, say after a flight with homophobic relatives, walking into the pub can be like a breath of fresh air and the sense of community and not being alone is mood altering to the extreme.

In other words, I love where I work. I am a bartender at a LGTBQ pub. And despite working there forty-eight hours a week (six nights a week, with 5pm starts and 1 am finishes) I can’t get enough of it. While I work nights, sometimes I will even go to the pub for lunch with friends and I don’t mind it at all. I love the community, the locals and the atmosphere and am honestly one of the people who love going to work.

Sometimes we even get straight people coming into the bar, and they are more than welcome to. A lot of the time straight friends will come as a show of support to help their friend who may be questioning their sexuality or just recently come out and have never been to a LGTB pub before and don’t have any LGTB friends.

I also love when parents will come in with their LGTB kids, the mum and dad will sit eating lunch with their young adult kid to show they are learning, adapting and supportive of their child’s sexuality.

There is only one problematic thing about some of the heterosexual guests (only some, the majority are lovely, supportive and very respectful) and that is hen’s nights/bachelorette parties, one or two of which seem to find their way to the pub every weekend.

We are obviously happy that they are getting married.

But to celebrate getting married in a pub that caters  to LGTB people who legally can’t get married is a bit insensitive.

For example, more than half of our customers as in loving, committed and long-term relationships and  if they could would have been married years ago. And so to come in to a LGTB safe space and remind a lot of the couples who are trying to enjoy a peaceful Friday night that they can’t get married yet is a touch insensitive.

Another problem with bachelorette parties is the lewd comments and sometimes even attempting groping. Women like to let loose and have fun on their friend’s last night of freedom. But if you want to flirt with men, go to a straight club or a strip show as lewd comments and groping makes many of the men feel awkward and like they are pieces of meat. LGTB spaces are a space for gay men where they can be open about their sexuality and so to come into the pub for that peace of mind and then to be suddenly hit on by partying women can be uncomfortable.  If you want to get down and party with someone at a gay club ladies, I’m sure some of our lovely lesbians will be willing to oblige you on the dance floor.’

I will share that blog post but I won’t share what my cousin wrote as it was ugly and contained offensive and foul language.

So what is your opinion on the bartender’s opinion?

Dear Jill,

It’s a very interesting and a very complex topic to discuss. It’s the kind of thing that I’m sure could be a conversation that lasted hours, but I’ll try to keep my response fairly simple. Please keep in mind that this is all simply my opinion, born from what limited knowledge and experience I have.

1) I have met people who are clearly heterophobic, so I would definitely say that it’s real. It’s quite rare but it’s out there. I have met a few people who just make little remarks about “breeders” being gross, making faces at straight couples, or not respecting a straight person refusing their advances because “everyone’s a little bit gay”. But then there are some, like one woman in particular that I used to see semi-regularly and even stayed in my home (a relative of an old roommate) who was extremely rude and could actually get violent because she disliked heterosexuals so much. She was very confrontational and had a blind hatred for anyone that wasn’t obviously gay.

2) In my opinion, as tempting as it is to create communities and safe places for certain types of people, I believe it is ultimately volunteered segregation and I think it doesn’t help things in the long run. This is, of course, an opinion and one that I am quite open about because I’ve not had many discussions with people who have spent large amounts of time in such communities. My main reason for this belief is because of what I see happening in my own country between the First Nations people and pretty much everyone else, or with the Chinese communities in some of the big cities. There are reservations for First Nations people to live in so that they can be with their own people and live in their own culture--a lovely idea. I’m not going to debate all the pros and cons and he-said-she-saids of it, because it is a sensitive subject, but I can tell you that that segregation leads to tension, hatred, and a lack of empathy from both sides. It creates an Us and Them mentality and divides us both mentally and physically based on nothing other than our races. My boyfriend has been verbally attacked and called a traitor by other First Nations people (yes, he is First Nations himself) because he disagrees with the idea of living on a reservation. In bigger cities, the same thing is sometimes seen with the China Town areas. I fully understand the desire to be surrounded by people just like you in order to feel comfortable, but I’ve never seen isolation lead to anything good.

3) That all being said, I give Australia more leeway with this particular situation because there is not yet real equality for the LGBT community. In Canada, we have equality and it’s quite rare to see open homophobia (at least in my province anyway-- I can’t speak for the whole country). Here, I think creating LGBT exclusive communities or bars would only serve to needlessly deepen a divide that has been slowly disappearing over the years. In countries or areas where homophobia is still common and there are not yet laws in place to give the same protections and rights to LGBT people and everyone else, I think the need for safe places is very understandable and I support it.

4) Sure, it’s insensitive to celebrate a marriage around people who can’t get married yet, but I really think that making a fuss about it isn’t going to help. If you want straight allies, you don’t make them by ruining something beautiful for them because you can’t have it too. Instead of getting mad that I can’t get married too (which is something that particular person can’t change for me), I would just try to be happy that they’ve found someone to love. Isn’t that what’s it’s supposed to be about anyway? Worry about hatred and discrimination, not someone just being thoughtlessly insensitive or else people stop listening to what you have to say.

5) I don’t really think what this bartender is talking about is necessarily an LGBT problem. Bachelorette parties go to straight bars and get out of hand too. I used to work in a Chinese restaurant and experienced a bachelorette party come through that were rowdy, inappropriately sexual for a family restaurant, and harassed the male staff and other customers. I’ve seen women be too pushy with their advances (married, gay, simply not interested, etc) and disrespectful of men’s right to their own body in many different situations as well. While the events discussed in the article occurred in a gay bar, I think it’s more of a problem with the double-standards our society has created regarding women’s sexual behaviour (primarily that it doesn’t count as sexual assault if a woman does it and women sexually assaulting people is considered “funny”) and people just being douchebags in general. It’s the kind of thing that pops up everywhere and it just so happens that this particular bar that experiences it is one for LGBT people (though the woman who wanted video of her making out with another woman was clearly LGBT targeted).

Finally, I suppose I do agree with the bartender, just with a couple of footnotes added in. I think safe places for LGBT people in Australia are appropriate as equality and acceptance has not yet been established. Celebrating a marriage in a gay bar is definitely insensitive, but I think getting upset about it will hurt the cause more than help it. And I absolutely agree that the behaviour described is incredibly offensive and inappropriate, but I don’t think it’s necessarily a gay club problem so much as it is people who would probably be just as offensive and inappropriate if they went somewhere else. Douchebags are gonna be douchebags no matter where they are.