#I never really got into the thinking like this with bg3 and never understood how people could but now I've got it with this game.

[six-improbable-things]

Reda (my P:WotR character) just finished her mythic transformation (angel), and boy do I feel bad for Lann. Like, "sorry, I know we got married and all, but now I'm immortal and I'm going to lead this crusade and then live forever fighting evil, but you're cursed with a shorter lifespan, and all you wanted was a quiet life anyways." Like, OUCH.

Also, I just saw this post:

and that's part of what got me thinking about this. Like, imagine the Commander's friends realizing that by the end of the Crusade, the person that they're fighting with isn't the person they met in Kenabres. They're someone entirely new, and more than a little bit terrifying. They're going to live forever, and be called off to Heaven or the Abyss or wherever else, but all of their friends are going to live and die on Golarion. And they might try and follow the Commander, but there's some places that they can't follow them, and that probably hurts.

Imagine trying to celebrate your victory with a literal angel, or even worse, an actual god. Can you ever relax and laugh the same way you did back at the Defender's Heart? Or is it always going to be a little bit awkward, the weight of divinity weighing things down. They're just so powerful, and it makes you feel small.

[thevesuvianchronicles]

Burnt Amber

I was reading something the other night about the fact that in the dark the cones in our eyes legit can't respond to light like, at all. considering my recent bg3 binge that obviously got me thinking abt a certain sassy vampire and thus... this piece. (I've also been told there's a scene that could go along with this but I legit just got to act 3) enjoy!

spoilers for vague bg3 things

If he had to explain it - which he never would- the world lost its color. Many people looked back upon childhood so happily, everything had been brighter, the world bigger, love was so easy and quickly fleeting. A babe’s eyes opened to blurry yet vivid shades, pastels, and tints. Yet the first thing Astarion’s crimson eyes had seen was only the darkness of his own coffin. Color meant nothing to a vampire who’s first vivid memories consisted of clawing his way through six feet of funerary dirt.

Though his vampiric vision allowed him to make out the different threads on a rich man’s lapel, he only ever saw it in moonlight. Only a reflection, a fraction of the beauty the sun would give the fabric. Where there had been pastels there was now muted tones, tinted colors became gray, and shades became nothing but more inky darkness.

Centuries of this and he slowly began to forget the true colors the world had to offer. Was purple always so deep that one couldn’t discern where a sleeve ended and the night air began? Had yellow always seemed so dull? And red… had red always been so greedy? Soaking up and glaring back the same sick color he saw in Cazador’s eyes.

That’s all his vampiric life had been, that was all it ever would be.

Yet there he stood, watching the last of the sun’s rays dip below the horizon

Despite his suave demeanor and sweetened words, he knew how to woo someone, lure them into his bed with his body and honeyed words, and later back to his master. Yet no words could describe the sun now. It burned his irises, his eyes ached for him to blink, turn away, and do anything but stare into the sun. He simply couldn’t stop; it would take away his breath if he needed to breathe.

His first realization that color was far better within the sun was, rather unfortunately, Gale. Upon falling on his ass, Gale had done the wizardly thing and began rambling. However, Astarion wasn’t paying attention at all. His eyes were on Gale’s robe. He couldn’t remember a purple ever being so vibrant, so cocky almost, as if requiring you to look at it. It fit Gale as Astarion would come to learn. Then he saw purple everywhere. Balsam blooms carried but seemed a warmer tint of Gale’s robe. Shadowheart’s armor was even darker, matching that which Astarion saw late at night in the alleys of Bauldur’s Gate. He hadn’t really thought about it but he rather thought purple and red clashed. Leave it to that wizard from Waterdeep to be a walking fashion faux pas.

Yet despite the fashion error, Astarion couldn’t stop thinking about purple, the many different shades he had seen in a matter of days. The sun making the slightest variations more obvious to his crimson eyes.

He first realized that light is what made the colors so polluted, as if the colors were waiting to leach into his eyes when he couldn’t help but stare at the color yellow. It was, by far, not his favorite color, drawing too much attention of a rouge like himself.

Yet the golden glow of the divine seemed to suit Shadowheart. The brilliance of a guiding bolt whizzing past his ear, bathing a goblin in light, setting it ablaze. The disgusting color had saved his skin to many times to count by now. All thanks to the devotee’s hands.

The vampire couldn’t say he understood Shadowheart’s devotion. But the sheer power her belief brought the color yellow, made him quirk a brow. Such polluting brillance made him wonder if light was able to redeem every color.

The color followed him after that battle. Yellow licked at Karlach’s flames, light reflected off the golden threads of Halsin’s armor, it even sparked every time Lae’zel sharpened her sword.

Yet there was nothing that could redeem the color red. No amount of light or dark could make crimson look any better. In darkness it looked like a cesspool of all things evil, an open maw waiting to swallow whatever it could. In the light of day, it reminded him of nothing but lost souls, glowing red eyes, and a sickly grin.

It was the color Cazador liked most on him, both his clothes and his skin. It was the color his life had been reduced to. Living off such crimson ichor, so much so that it stained him, stained even his eyes from what he had gathered about vampiric looks. It was the only color that he would be happy to forget, but never could.

“You know if you stare at the sun long enough… you could go blind.” The voice came from behind him, his pointed ears finally picking up on the crunch of gravel beneath feet. His eyes did feel a bit dry as he blinked, black and swirling colors hindering his vision as he looked back over his shoulder.

The leader of their little group was… interesting to say the least. So focused on the tadpole and their companion's journeys that Astarion hadn’t learned much about their own personal goals, if any. He should work on that.

“I always love to look at beautiful things, not unlike yourself darling.” Astarion let the words lilt off his tongue, but didn’t turn away from the setting sun.

He heard a small hum from you as you settled beside him, standing close enough for him to tell that you had refreshed yourself from today’s adventuring.

Neither said anything for a while, the gentle rustle of trees and soft calls of animals in the underbrush the only noise. He had been so lost in his musings that he hadn’t realized how far the sun had set, a barely visible sliver of yellow still visible surrounded by orange and red.

“Well… now that the lovely colors are gone I do believe I’ll turn in for the night. A book and a glass of red do seem to be calling my name.” Astarion sighs, as if it would be a hassle to get up and walk the few steps to his tent. It is a hassle, to leave the presence of their leader has become more and more of a hassle on his heart than he’s willing to accept.

“Don’t go now, it’s just started to change.” Your voice was soft, softer than he has ever heard it and a glance tells him that your eyes are still on the setting sun.

“No thank you darling, I do think I’ve seen enough shades of red for a thousand lifetimes.” There is a twist of pain in his voice, one that makes him wrinkle his nose. He was getting too easy, a slip like that with Cazador and he would have been reminded how much he hates red.

“But the sky is beautiful-“

He cuts you off with a flippant wave of his hand and a scoff. A change of subject was all they needed, easier territory. “It’s just red. You know they say a red sky at night means-“

“It’s not just red Astarion.” You cut him short this time, tone sharp. He didn’t understand why you would defend such a color. Of all things to fight for, a color. They saw red spilled every day, every day their leader fought, for teiflings, for druids, for their companions. Each day that color ruined everything it touched.

“Oh? Do tell darling, what is oh so special about that distasteful mix of colors. A muddled mess of all things awful-“

“I rather think red is beautiful.” Astarion snaps his eyes up, disgust curling his lips, a flaunting jab just ready on the tip of his tongue when your eyes stop him.

At some point, he wasn’t sure when, you had turned to look at him. Eyes just as soft as your voice had been. There is a sweet tilt to your lips as he turns, as if finally seeing what they had been after.

He sees the minute shift of you eyes, as if darting back and forth. He can hear the uptick in your heartbeat, the tension releasing from your shoulders. As if the sight of him was what you were after, as if waiting to catch his eye.

Then he remembered. Remembered exactly what color his eyes now were.

“I happen to like that color.” You grinned, eyes steady on his. His mind was blank, no haughty taunt or seductive words. He could do nothing but blink as a grin spread wide on your lips and you turned back towards the sun.

“When the sun hits just right… it’s beautiful, a burst of burnt amber. I think it’s the prettiest color I’ve ever seen.” Astarion knew they were definitely not talking about the sunset anymore. He couldn’t help but stare at you. The curve of your nose, the way your smile seemed so giddy, the way the sun reflected in your own eyes.

Red was the color of the flowers Karlach had tried to pick for all of them. It was the color the jewels in Lae’zel’s armor, the color the hem of Gale’s awful robe. And it was the color of the blood you so willingly gave him. Had offered as soon as he had explained himself that night, without asking for anything in return. You were so different than what he expected.

He tutted, realizing he had been staring and turns back towards the sunset, listening closely as you go to sit on the ground. The bright yellow of the sun diffused into a russet orange that slowly eased into a vibrant, dazzled red. He sighed, slowly settling himself beside you, far closer than before.

“Yes darling, perhaps you’re right. Perhaps I could grow to love it.”

[thelikesoffinn]

been thinking about it lately and Ascended Astarion = Dead Dove content and I'm not sure that's really understood, even by the writers. when I finally got around to the character I decided to ascend him with, I was SUPREMELY disappointed by the conversations options following it. it seemed like the dialogue choices were trying to push the narrative on my character that they made this choice w/o considering the consequences and they are bound to regret it. the closest I could get to answering his question of "why did u let me go thru w it?" was "I wanted u to be powerful".

but with that character? my accept Bhaal durge? that isn't the reasoning. at all. (related: "what do u want as a reward?" "ur body" was the closest answer my character could give. otherwise I'd've answered "murder :))")

for context, this run was born of a conversation w my friend discussing supposed content no one had seen bc "no one's that evil". we thought, what's more evil than killing literally every npc? I failed the conceit of the challenge immediately bc I can't handle senseless animal cruelty in my games. killing children? fine (u need a mod to do this in BG3, but I am thankfully plenty delighted to use mods), killing a neutral animal npc? no can do.

so I started this durge (they are the only character that can come close to "killing" Gale with that first interaction) run with the intention of killing everyone except Shadowheart (only a cleric of Shar can truly kill Aylin) and Astarion (bc I need to smooch him). (and there is a mod for playing an origin character as durge, which would have meant playing as Shadowheart, but I MUST smooch Astarion and I don't tend to do het or female romances, unless I'm forced to (*sighs dreamily* oh, Garrus Vakarian). I'm just not interested in that set of equipment in that way, so may as well just make a durge dude.) somehow something went wonky and Halsin ended up joining us and I was so perplexed I just allowed him to stay. (he's meant to attack if u destroy the grove but free him anyway, but instead he just showed up that night and went straight into his Moonrise spiel. is it bc the wolf Silver never aggro'd me and thus survived???) so I fixed the Shadow Curse all while killing every single humanoid and hostile animal in acts 1 & 2. including Thaniel, which makes Halsin's talks later in act 3 of getting news from Thaniel and the Grove hysterical. idk what I did but I sure as hell broke this poor man.

(on a related note, Halsin will give out to u when u accept Bhaal, but will still give u the "u have exceeding my expectations, also we should bang" in the same conversation. I DON'T KNOW WHAT I DID BUT IT'S DARKLY FUNNY.)

in the conversation when Astarion is expressing surprise that u let him go thru w it, my durge is just like, yes my motivation is that I like to kill ppl :))). it's not a sex thing for him (that is separate from the murder!), but he's still fine w the outcome. yes, Astarion looks down on him, but that's fine! he's allowed to be wrong about that, durge doesn't care. so long as Astarion lets him kill ppl he genuinely just does not give a shit.

(I actually had the idea that if Halsin were to ever rediscover his morals and tried to leave he'd ask Astarion to turn him so Halsin would not have a choice. as I said, this durge *does not fucking care*.)

this is probably the only character I will play that would let Astarion ascend bc I enjoy dead dove SOMETIMES, but not always or in large doses, but I get so few dialogue options that convey that in an rp sense! I don't think the writers/devs REALLY took that into consideration, sometimes. like, yeah, there are going to be ppl making fucked up choices but surely no one would go THIS far! for THIS reason! honey, u need to look up the Dead Dove tag on AO3, there are absolutely ppl making choices for those fucked up reasons.

(and I understand the whole "this confirms to Astarion about sex yadda yadda". even if that's not Tav/Durge motivation, that's how ASTARION would *interpret* it.)

(oh yes, and also, don't let Orin abduct Yenna. it doesn't matter whether u find out in camp or the sewers, Grub will not survive. I was devastated. if I'd known, I would have made sure Halsin was available for her, but she won't abduct a party member or someone ur romancing.)

long story short, I want to play a durge that even ascended Astarion finds unsettling. that's the dream.

Hello there, duck!

Your run sounds delightfully evil! I wish I could play one of those, haha, but I'm too soft hearted. My one evil run with my durge Salira was ended before even entering the grove because I felt horrible after getting rid of Gales hand! Seriously, I can barely take killing the squirrel as durge, and I always save Alfira because I feel horrendous otherwise!

(Fun fact, on all five runs I've done Yenna just vanished at some point and grubs was left standing in my camp, which was like...eh?)

And yes, Halsin is always somewhat of an issue, isn't he? He's just running around, causing mayhem in peoples games because he seems slightly bugged out, haha. I had one run, where he wouldn't go to the spot where we save Thaniel because he joined the fight against Marcus at Last Light and somehow got stuck, for some reason. Same run, none of his vocals would play, which was also very interesting. Everybody would make noise when they climbed or got hurt but Halsin was always silent and just there! And in another run the dude really straight up hated me - he was so mean and snappy, I swear to god he wanted my Durge dead - and then he suddenly went: "Hey you're super cool and strong and I just want to gently fuck you beneath the moonlight if you'll let me" and I was like: Say what.

Regarding the dead Dove: I've talked to people of Discord before, and some of them mentioned something similar a couple of times, but personally, I do think the writers actually knew what they were doing here!

Of course, I do agree that it relies heavily on the regret notion and that it somewhat shoehorns you into a certain narrative corner, I noticed that too when I was ascending him for research - I hated doing that, but all for the asks, haha - but I thought it was really fitting for what it is!

The bad ending, that is. I know we all somewhat forget that because of how people view him as a character, but ascension is the bad ending. Even on an evil run, where your character may have considered all options, it is very likely that Tav hasn't accounted for one very important part of being a true vampire.

The obsession.

It's still somewhat mild in the game, though definitely there, but it will only get stronger as time goes on, and it will probably get to the point that the only escape is death. Either his or Tav's. So, in the end, ascension will come with an armload of regret and the writers were making sure we know that.

And, on top of that, even if we let him ascend in a pursuit for power - or in in your durge's special case: murder :) - we still cast spawn Astarion aside because he doesn't fit our needs, thus making it very clear to him that who he is isn't enough and his behaviour is the price we now pay.

It's pretty much the same with all the other companions as well - justiciar Shadowheart and ascended Lae'zel, for example. However, it doesn't bother us as much, because we have different expectations towards ascended Astarion than, for example, dark justiciar Shadowheart. We don't expect a positive narrative here, a narrative where becoming shady-shar's loyal subject isn't an objectively dumb decision to make, so we don't mind the dead dove as much. It's exactly what we've been expecting - and Aylin even warned us how Shadowheart would change upon becoming a dark justiciar - so yepp. This went exactly how we thought it would and this is what we wanted.

Astarion, however, is a somewhat special case, because his bad ending is, by far, the one that gets the most romanticised. He's so heavily romanticised by so many, that the bad parts nearly start to fade, even with those who don't like the ascended ending. It becomes just 'the other ending', if you will.

And yet, it's still the bad ending.

Ascension is the bad ending for a character that we've somewhat given up on. That we misunderstood so deeply, mayhaps, that we traded his entire being for power and, quite frankly, beauty. We showed him that he isn't enough, we let the boy run and hide the only way he knew how and now we're faced with the consequences and yes, it's really dead dove but...what did we expect?

[exantivancrow]

Hi!! A bit late rip but 2, 3, 6, 11 from the pride asks for hanna, fen, and anyone else you'd like! c:

laya, the light of my life, tysm!!! quick rundown of the bg3 ocs:

fen's my non-tav half drow halsin romancer, nature domain cleric of yondalla (listen, the underdark sucked) guild artisan

hanna's my witcher oc i borrowed for my first run when i got decision paralysis on the cc; human battlemaster fighter outlander who is also romancing halsin in her run bc he's eskel-coded

alecto's my gith oath of vengeance paladin soldier romancing astarion (and probably also halsin...... we're not gonna talk about it)

2. What's your oc's orientation? (Romantic, sexual, platonic, alterous, etc.) Do they have opinions about it?

Fen: Pansexual, bisexual, no matter your opinions on what label works best, if you're hot she's into it. She thinks it's kinda fascinating that this isn't the consensus on attraction. On the aromantic spectrum somewhere, because I'm incapable of making allo characters.

Hanna: She's pretty sure she's heterosexual; she has slept with more than just men, but she finds herself primarily focusing on men. She leads a busy stressful complicated life so if someone offers, that's all that matters, she'll take it, but she's not as into it as she could be. She's never really dedicated time/effort to figuring out more because she's got a busy stressful complicated life, but she is demiromantic.

Alecto: Their perception of sexuality (whoever is strong is attractive) is the only correct way. Astarion is strong in spirit, and in combat, if not in body, and he's not helpful in explaining how it works for people not raised in a creche, he's also drawn to strength.

3. How did your oc discover themselves? Did something cause them to question or have they always known?

Fen: She's always known. She's been through a lot of different cultures, and understood from her beginning how she worked.

Hanna: Was hit on by a gorgeous tiefling woman within her first year on the road, and thought "oh I can't pass up this opportunity", and then didn't enjoy it as much as she figured she would. Spent the next couple years finding the pattern before realizing she just wasn't as into women as she originally thought.

Alecto: The gith way is the only right way. Everyone born in the creche knows this.

6. How does your oc feel about labels? Theirs, or in general?

Fen: Likes learning new ones! Both for herself and others. She thinks they're neat.

Hanna: Doesn't mind labels, but doesn't use them herself; does her absolute (hehehe) best to respect others'.

Alecto: Thinks labels are restrictive until someone tries to explain otherwise, and they just find that more confusing. Why say you fit into a category if that's not always true, then you're lying about it? Zheir friends mark it a lost cause. She isn't rude about it on purpose though, he's just genuinely confused.

11. Is your oc open about their identity? Are they more blunt or lowkey? Why or why not?

Fen: Has a thing about sharing personal information needlessly, is not open about it.

Hanna: Is blunt if asked, has no problem with being open about it, but non-maliciously considers it to be a waste of conversation. We could sit around and talk about objective statements about each other, or we could go take care of someone who needs help. She has a preference.

Alecto: Is, in fact, too blunt about it. Karlach once made the mistake of saying that talking to people about it is a way of showing you trust them, and listening to people about it is a way of showing you care, and now she brings it up (in too much detail) when she's trying to make friends. Her existing friends have to explain "it means she likes you".

looking at this, glad to see they're all as autistic as I am, lmaoooo; my new bg3 blog @lastlightinternet will feature more of these kiddos eventually! thanks for the ask laya!!

[ultramaga]

Thoughts on Baldur’s Gate 3

The romantic interests so far are awful. While I think the two women in the test version are not repugnant physically, I certainly cannot say they are beautiful as corresponding characters in other games are.

If I saw her in real in life, I would think ... “meh”.

Vastly inferior technology but Morrigan’s sexy outfit works for the character.

Viconia, in BG2, looked gorgeous. In fact, the downgrade in this sequel is staggering. If you look at the fan art for those two characters, it is prodigious, and often shockingly erotic. You see a lot of women cosplayed as Morrigan too.

Viconia is a bit trickier as you have to be careful that SJWs don’t crucify you for ‘blackface’. The weird thing is, they decided that Giths can be love interests now?

She’s ok I guess? Sort of ugly-cute? It’s so bizarre to compare her to the depiction that Gith had originally.

Gith were hideous.

Which was fine. There are plenty of pretty races. Having them as skeletal serial killers with unexplained goop oozing from elbows worked pretty well.

Githzerai weren’t as nasty and looked more human - probably because they didn’t mess with the same demonic forces.

For some weird reason, Githyanki were changed by Wizards of the Coast to make them somewhat more appealing.

Don’t ask me why. I mean, I can find some nonhuman women appealing - elves are basically humans+

Galadriel is a sexy bitch an’ no mistake. Even dwarves got all silly around her.

Even evil, she was totally bodacious. From the baldur’s gate series:

Aerie was gorgeous, yet a little alien. Ok, so that’s looks. What about the other factors? Well, Morrigan was a total bitch, and Viconia was evil, so why do the female love interests in bg3 repulse me? They are both just unpleasant. Viconia was complicated, and would explain why she did what she did, and didn’t just assume you would lick her boots. I haven’t played a female character, but I can say the BG3 love interests treat males just like feminists do - contempt and narcissism seem to be the only emotions. Maybe they are just like that with everyone. But Morrigan had a sense of humour, and Viconia was weirdly innocent. Both acted the way she did because everyone she had ever known acted that way, and when Viconia tried behaving better, she still copped it from the other races, who didn’t make an effort to reform her, but just wanted to murder her on the spot. Also, Morrigan had an unfair advantage in that the voice actor already had an audience who associated her with sexual attractiveness.

Pretty sexy voice in any case imo. With Piper in Fallout 4, I couldn’t say the looks were all that great, and unless you mod her, she isn’t wearing a sexy outfit, but the VA made sure that I and many others found her appealing.

And I’ve seen cosplay of hers that is gorgeous...

But the voice from the computer game is what sealed the deal for me, plus the personality. Piper isn’t just a “good person”, she tries to do good but she has flaws, she’s bubbly but gets depressed, she comes out with the odd sexual comment but then acts rather chaste. She’s interesting as a person, which makes her sexy.

She puts her foot in her mouth sometimes. She is social, but socially awkward. Pushy and shy. She’s three dimensional, ironically.

I don’t get that impression from the BG3 lot. Lae'zel doesn’t want to talk to you, and just wants to kill everyone else she meets except for the Githyanki, who just want to kill her - oh, spoilers, that’s the twist. Her Chaotic Evil people would kill her rather than cure her, because it is easier. Who could have seen that coming? I wonder. It is a mystery. Actually, there’s no way she wouldn’t have expected her own people to regard her as expendable because that is how she treats EVERYONE ELSE. And the other love interest?

Yup, sneering contempt is her usual expression. She’s probably heard about a male suicide prevention conference, and is on her way to sabotage it. I just think that they received a directive to make these characters unappealing, because ... male gaze ... misogyny ... rape culture! Here’s a list of the best selling computer games.If you ever see a gamer stereotype in media showing gamers as only interested in big titty girlies, have a look at how far down the list the titty titles are. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_best-selling_video_games I guess Skyrim sort of counts, because if you know how, you can mod it to be sexy, but out of the box, it isn’t really.

So Skyrim sort of qualifies, in that there is a niche of modders who are really dedicated to making it work for romance/sex. Hmm. I haven’t played “The Witcher” but apparently the community is really ... dedicated.

I am told the unmodded game has a bit of sexiness to it, but i haven’t watched or played. Looking at PC games - The Sims technically has romance although I couldn’t say the characters matter imo. Again, modders put a lot of sex into it. Starcraft - one of the most popular games - had a weird romance with a character that was transformed into a monster.

The game devs really understood how to play with the line of repulsion vs attraction. Kerrigan can be quite flirty.

Some days she just wants a hug. Some days, a planetary bombardment of her enemies. She’s complicated. “ After the battle, Raynor found himself in Joeyray's Bar on Mar Sara, reminiscing on the past. At this point, he saw (or believed he saw) Kerrigan return, appearing as she had prior to her infestation by the zerg. Whether real or not, Kerrigan asked him whether he was ready to "get out of here," to which Raynor responded positively, he exited the bar and was never seen again.[174] “

Romance matters, Romance is a primal human drive. Computer games don’t have to be romantic, but if they are going to try, I hope they do a better job than what I have seen thus far of BG3, because it really does give the impression of Social Justice misandry instead.