#I tweaked just about the same
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Hard being a bug enjoyer when you have a specific phobia of bugs that makes you not be able to enjoy all bugs.. I want to love them all, they're all just little guys <3. But the fear. The fear that awakes in me is so intense that I feel like Jamil possessed me for a moment and I saw the light and said light was fire
#this happened last night#got so happy cause omg lil critters all over my feed yesterday :)#AND THEN BOOM#JUMPSCARE#FELT LIKE A CAT GETTING SCARED BY A CUCUMBER#suddenly remembered that time when Jamil talked about finding a bug on his hand when he was about to eat a date#I tweaked just about the same#monoduke yaps#anyways I'm fine now no worries
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I think depictions of Anya being cruel to Curly or drawing out his suffering are artful and chilling but completely miss the point of the story and her character.
I'm not saying she doesn't deserve to have that "I told you so" moment with him but not in something callous or cold. Even if that is how it happened, she'd immediately feel guilty cause at that point she's not tormenting her tormenter or even the person truly at fault. She's doing something cathartic, similar to how Jimmy likely hits Curly to release rage he can't against the rest of the crew. She'd see herself as no different when she'd come back from the moment and see Curly cowering at her. She wants someone to take responsibility but how does being cruel to the defenseless help? Why would she want the power Jimmy has over her over Curly?
The idea of her extending someone else's pain is just so against the struggles she already faces and how she can't even bring herself to cause someone pain even to help them. Her very desire is to release herself from her own suffering and I doubt she'd even fine some sort of guilty release in being cruel to another.
#anya is not a character i see taking agency or indulging in cathartic behaviors#not knowingly like i see her as a character trapped in her head and maybe in the scenario she's cruel to Curly she is envisioning Jimmy#in his place but its not a story about justice or those deserving of punishment and those not like its the opposite of people projecting#their issues on the wrong people and saying things to the wrong people and doing things they shouldn't but anya uniquely falls out of it as#she is subjected to a lot of it but it is also not something she wants to subject another person to like you are doing what Jimmy does and#placing ur rage into another persons and viewing their actions through your eyes like she'd more likely yell at him than do harm or#cause him more pain like at least make it in character#but also she clearly doesn't want to see jimmy or curly in the same light and doesnt because she still repeatedly goes to Curly for comfort#and protection and god there's like concepts that need to be applied to characters individually and then the story as a whole#we can not view the game through only one themed lens less we forget to inspect the compounding factor of Anya is so much more than girl#that needs to be allowed to go off but a woman that simply wants right to be done by her and no more harm like she doesn't want to be aroun#the suffering like idk but some of yall would just benefit from like understanding that people are inherently grey with the capabilities of#black n white thinking or actions#mouthwashing#mouthwashing game#anya mouthwashing#i like her the most but then again i am defensive of all women in media and hate when people change the way the character would take agency#for themselves like yes I want her to tweak out but she just wouldn't and I like seeing realistic depictions of a woman suffering the way#she is like shes not the type at the end of the movie to have a one liner but feel a shallow freedom cause she needs to realistically heal#idk but its just like there is an obbsession forming with making her character her pain and not how she handles and navigates the issue
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"marco bezzecchi could be about to break a record that's been standing since marc marquez came here in 2014" - Argentina GP 2025
#can i also just say the shine in marcs eyes.... thats bez earning some good points from his crush brUUUUH#TWEAKED OUT SO BAD IT'S 3AM AND I COULDNT EVEN SCREAM ABOUT THIS??????????????????#MY HANDS WERE COLD. MY STOMACH WENT COLD. I WAS NERVOUS AND EXCITED AT THE SAME TIME#MARCMARC#MAAAAARCMAAAARCCCC !!!!!!#marco bezzecchi#marc marquez#motogp#bezquez#argentinagp#argentina 2025#mb72#mm93
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And what if I said I scrapped like half of this comic, rewrote it and started redrawing it 👉🏻👈🏻 :3
#I'M NOT MAD ABT IT THO#I still have like the last 12 pages fully done and I'm very happy about them#I'm keeping those and yk it's still gonna end in the same way#but I rewrote all of the beginning and middle of it. and scrapped the pages I'd already finished bc of this#yay 🫠 but man. fuck it#yk when something just isn't working?? like you tweak it again and again#but it still never feels quite right?#yeah that's what was happening#so after trying to tweak it again and again so many times I just gave up and started over#and that did it actually kfkfkkvkv now it feels right#and it is what it is like if I have to lose progress then so be it#at least I found what was causing the issue. and I'm sure that whenever I do a comic again I'm gonna be aware of that right away#so I've LEARNED. looking on the bright side this was a learning experience#sleep.txt#sketch tag#viper comic#I'm legit excited to get the next pages done now tho#bc the story just feels a lot more enjoyable to me personally#and the scenes are gonna be fun to draw......... and the lighting 👀 there's some lighting scenarios there I haven't tried out yet#rubbing my little hands together hehe
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stop he was literally a fucking kid. he looks so young here, i’m gonna end it all.

#not to infantilize him or anything#BUT IVE HAD ENOUGH#i think finally being the same age as him and no longer looking up to him as an older figure has got me tweaking lately#he’ll be younger than me here in like five months. then what tf am i supposed to do?#i’m not even worried about adulthood i’m just concerned about being older than the character i fused my soul with at 15#like minds#nigel colbie#murderous intent#like minds 2006#tom sturridge
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Going to sleep thinking about Jack Abbot AND Pope Cody hitting it from the back. GOOD NIGHT EVERYBODY!

#I just know they both fuck good#need them real fucking bad#at the same time even#thank you Shawn Hatosy for giving me two characters to tweak about#so thankful for you my fine king 🙏
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Thinking about my wip
#im tweaking#it's gonna be sooo good#i daydreamed about it so much and some of y'all are in for a TREAT#so much ust and pining#I've never written a burn this slow#but they're obsessed with each other all the same like you know the drill#when are they gonna kiss? how should I know?#it's 17k and it's just the beginning#but derek is already shaking with how much he wants stiles#sterek#writing#writeblr#like when you finally get to the kiss it wiuld be so satisfying for you that you’ve waited this long#i havent written it yet but i feel it#with my heart ❤
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ominous and threatening sketchy ... sniffle ...
★ some extra stuff under cut :



some concept drawingz i made for the little guyz of an unfinished fic of mine



and headshotz that i redrew digitally
#the bit where sketch iz quoting a bible verse iz based on the jacksfilms reactbot#like . i can't watch a clip of that thing saying that without thinking “damn . sketchbook core” for some strange reazon#why . of course !!! itz cuz hez an angel who can do no wrong !!! my sweet sweet guardian angel !!!#and the first one waz like . made ironically#i waz gonna do a follow-up drawing that would be like “cloze your eyez . spooky ...” while i writhed in bed – y'know mouthwashing reference#but whatever . therez alwayz next time#im have mixed thoughtz on the humanizationz – i still feel like shit when i think about that unfinished fic#i might tweak them if i ever try to finish that thing ; i just wonder if they'd hate me for thiz#sigh#dhmis#dhmis art#dhmis au#high voltage au#dhmis sketchbook#sketch the sketchpad#dhmis hv sketchbook#^ hez the only one from the hv au actually included#dhmis tony#tony the talking clock#dhmis colin#colin the computer#honestly . i felt kinda awkward giving sketch dimplez – ive had people tell me to smile less becauze they make me look bad in photoz#and like . i get it . theyre right – i don't want them to have to put up with that too#i just really wanted to project smth of my own onto them#i did the same with my acne . but actually i really love my acne . it makez me look masc az shit#now all i have to do iz get tonyz killer eyebagz and facial hair and id be perfect ....#i dropped the ball with the digital drawing'z coloring huh ༎ຶ‿༎ຶ#well . what can you really expect from me#i dunno#like and subscribe and comment what your opinionz on the conceptz are and maybe i won't burn my house down !!!
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It's so funny because I genuinely can't even tell what Scone and Tart were back then. Was it romance? Was it sexual intimacy? Was it pure adoration? Was it familial love? Were they jealous of the other? Was it the god and the mortal? Was it toxic as hell? Did they both love each other, whether platonically or romantically? Did they always hate one another but never have the heart to admit it? Or are they still lying to themselves with whatever strength they have to think of the other as an enemy?
Yes to all of the above questions.
#crumpet's shenanigans#Goddddd every time I think about them they just. scratch my brain so well#Like they hate eachother but at the same time THEY CAN'T#BECAUSE THEY'RE ALWAYS DRAWN TO EACHOTHER#I CAN'T EVEN TELL IFIT'S MEANT TO BE ROMANTIC OR JUST#DUDE I'M GENUINELY TWEAKING
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I see a lot of discussion in the DR fandom on some characters that die early having "missed potential", and while I agree that definitely a few of them could have been written better or differently, part of me wonders if that missed potential is kind of the point? A character is shaping up to be something, so you get invested in their story, which then makes their early death all the more tragic. I mean, of course it's still a tough needle to thread to get it to land as tragic versus falling flat, and I'm not sure how closely some of these characters hit the mark. But I Do think some characters aren't actually "missed opportunities" and instead played their role in the plot how they were meant to, if maybe a little suboptimally.
#''not missed opportunities but playing their role as they were meant to- just suboptimally'' sounds contradictory I think#but I just mean that I wouldn't radically change their role in the story- keep the general progression and end point the same#just tweak some details here and there#I see this a lot with Taka in particular and Taka's story is really fucking tragic#and I do think that his death could've been handled with a bit more focus because he's one of the most interesting characters in thh#But overall... I think him having such a tragic time in the killing game was really interesting for his character#I love him but I wouldn't change THAT much about his story yknow#I guess in that sense he is a bit of a missed opportunity. but not as much as some people say#I also feel this way about kork. but my feelings on the guy are so wildly all over the place I just dont feel like talking about it ghdsjkf#shut up me
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they have me so fucked up over the 'L brothers copium' i've been huffing lately actually about to start rocking in my chair back && forth breathing into a paper bag while drawing things that aren't even $day
#text#i think the most simple way to put it would be dallas' behavior boiling down to how bum ass cheating boyfriends treat and then cry to -#- their girlfriend.#actually that's most apparent with how he has houston sheltering his grown ass from being sniped and then how he literally -#- dragged him into his mob like a good 10 years after#these gaps in their brotherhood is crazy he is seriously a absentee brother and nothing can make me think otherwise Ever#it actually has me tweaking they're gonna have the most nuclear time period of their lives around pd2 events#and they just have to survive that period to move on#well they can;t move on because they're flesh and blood but whatever#anyways i believe that dallas himself and others do think that he actually loves houston and cares for him deeply but ijust know -#- that he is willing to run houston's wellbeing into the ground if it makes him feel good about himself in return#play with your little brother's sanity. Win stupid prizes#that's why i'm using the cheater comparison because just how a cheater cheats for no reason esentially just bc they resent you -#- and have no problem making you feel defiled from them doing that#dallas wud have no problem with compromising houston's emotions just the same#because he actually just deeply hates him#< but that's a broad statement that actually touches everything in hsi character ; he doesn't have the ability to love or commit to anythin#as i said before . except for crime#i say it's because he's reincarnated satan or something of that sort but he might also just be a cruel human being EZ#he doesn't see his mistreatment as hatred for houston cus seeing houston feel like shit awakens his deep motherly instinct and he thinks -#- that giving that love is more than enough........in a way#basically he doesn't want houston to have nice things ever in his life ex. friends or anyone close of any kind cus that means houston -#- wud have other people to turn to#he wants him to have no one else and no place else he can go to#cause dallas doesn;t have much of that#since he is a clammed up person by default#esentially draining houston of everything. so that houston can depend on him for everything#< HIS VERSION OF A BROTHERLY REUNION😍💕#actually having houston slapping him around in a rage fit might have dallas feeling liek he's nearing redemption for all that abandonment#but not redemption for the current mistreatment
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Breaking news for no one who cares:
My pitch to direct TGWDLM at my school didn’t get picked (despite me being a directing major at a school with little to none directing opportunities and non directing majors (MTs) getting it, both of whom I have worked with and are very sweet and super talented but still a frustrating situation)
So I manifest that one day I will get to put up my Magnum Opus known as my production of The Guy Who Didn’t Like Musicals. One day. Just for once…
Until then, keep you updated on what other ways I will contribute to this production at my school. And I lowkey better get cast or be the Dramaturgy. Tbh.
#tgwdlm#the guy who didn't like musicals#team starkid#I feel like their pitch is super gay so I am expecting sapphic Paulkins in this production#at the same time#I can imagine the people they are gonna cast and if they cast this one guy as Paul I’m gonna tweak out don’t do Paul like that#he’s really talented but he’s a straight white tenor in a musical theatre bfa program#cast as a non performing major as Paul would be crazy work#actually cast me as Paul.#wasian lesbian Paul#I can’t believe I just wrote that#i’m actually losing it#I’m actually really disappointed about the way things worked out especially because I wasn’t super confident at first but as time went on#got more and more confident as a director and my vision#my vision which will go nowhere#just for once#the implications#the implications about me worrying that I’ll have to sacrifice my theatremaking in favor of getting a steady job to pay my loans#and take care of my parents#and how theatre is a rich person’s game#i’m spiraling#I have to wake up early to go to the gym with my sister#my life was taken over by Starkid for 48 days and I can’t consume or listen to anything without hopelessness taking me over#the dreamer has dreamed her dream#jk will summon the apotheosis#I dreamt about the apotheosis last night#it was super meta and it ended up with me realizing I was in a fanfiction the whole time#which I think was fitting with the way TGWDLM deconstructs musicals#if they do gender conscious casting and I get Paul that’s crazy work#thought I was pokey ended up being Paul
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I grew up Mormon and I'm genderqueer and unfortunately that leads to the most embarrassing discovery I've ever made about myself: I get gender euphoria from dressing up like a Mormon man 😩 😭
Like I'm looking in the mirror like 🤩 meanwhile my outfit is khaki chinos and and a white button-down and between the outfit and my very Mormon face, I look so much like a Mormon missionary that you'd instinctively start looking for the other one as soon as you saw me. This is the most embarrassing thing that has ever happened to me 😭 what do I do 😭🧍
#with a few tweaks i can kinda look like someone from The Mummy (1999) but the slope is slippery#i put on a tie just to see how it looked with the new shirt#and i was giggling so much about the gender euphoria of it all and at the same time dying of shame#white button down plus khakis plus a tie is just what men are supposed to wear apparently according to my subconscious lol#so on the one hand: nice i look like a dude. and on the other hand: yikes lmaooooo#gender euphoria
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in regard to the icemav convo about american made cars: I think it would be funny if after mav gets his regular license, ice buys him a truck that they can use for transporting stuff to the hangar and when he gifts it to mav all the man can do is laugh bc stamped across the ass is MAVERICK. It’s a 2023 ford maverick (in area 51 bc I’m partial to that color)
and mav likes it, but he doesn’t love driving it bc it’s so big (and he just likes being a passenger princess too much), so ice drives it mostly which inspires a whole lot of jokes about ice liking having maverick’s name stamped on his ass. bradley gags from the other room every time.
if it matters to u, i agree with this hc 150% on rhetoric grounds. thank god for your mind.
however i would like to raise the issue that recent american pickup trucks have become non-useful, overexpensive, and suburban-coded in a way i think ice and mav would reject. the ford maverick was built with the intention of dropping kindergarteners off at school, not of actually doing hard labor. see below infographic for what I mean.

It’s a fucking travesty. Trucks are so ugly and useless now. the maverick is not immune to this. (maverick below)

what good is having a fucking truck if it can’t even hold two REGULAR ASS BIKES in the bed. & when the bed is empty the chassis is unbalanced in a way that leads to more accidents etc. (tbf that was true in the 70s/80s too but im feeling more hateful towards modern trucks rn). In short—the modern American pickup truck is no longer useful, it’s a way to virtue signal to other Americans that you *think * you know what hard labor is, even when you’re driving around in a glorified odyssey with a teeny tiny bed that can barely hold a couple bags of mulch for the back garden
ice & mav don’t even have any little kids anymore, i think they’d consider a backseat useless & a waste of space
SO i would like to offer you a Compromise, which is that ice & mav buy either (or both) a 1974 ford maverick AND/OR a 1990 ford maverick


for the Funny Name & coolness factor (& the “making Bradley vom cause of how cute his parents are” factor), and then soup up, like, a 1984 Chevy C10 for actual towing/hauling purposes.
#*slaps roof of 2022 ford maverick* you could hit so many grade schoolers with this bad boy#the 1974 ford maverick is. admittedly extremely sexy and i am only kind of a ford guy#god the 1990 maverick too. just kind of beast mode. i can see that.#love the ask though. i hope you don’t mind my tweaks. we’re on the same wavelength#my vitriol for the modern american truck stems from my hatred of my grandfather’s 2020 f250#which he has never used to tow anything once and constantly complains about how hard it is to find parking in suburban california 😀#yeah brother no shit!#the one cool thing about new trucks is you can use them as a generator for a few days though#we lose power for days on end where i live during fire season and that truck has been really helpful#but it’s ass ugly and not otherwise useful.#pete maverick mitchell#tom iceman kazansky#icemav#bradley rooster bradshaw#asks#mav being a passenger princess has to be canon#a man physiologically built to sit shotgun ❤️#if u get a truck with an actual bed u can drive ur war hero husband out into the desert#& lay out a blanket in the back & make out with him under the stars#can’t do that in a 2023 maverick
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Cutely has a crisis over the fact that I’m actually getting close to the next stage of my life and I generally didn’t think I’d make it this far even though I’m still not that close to the end I am at the same time and that I’m truely past the point where I was entering my current phase of life and it doesn’t feel that long ago but it was actually like several years ago now and I feel old
#my birthday is approaching and I’m having a like 1/8 life crisis#Younger me would be probably be like omg our life is so sad if they saw me#but like at the same time they would also be like OMG WE HAVE FRIENDS THAT WERE NOT CONSTANTLY QUETSIONING OUR FRIENDSHIP???#and they would think I’m cool too#they’re childhood innocence would be crush but they would think I’m cool#BRO I FEEL PROPER OLD NOW CAUSE I LITERALLY JUST THOUGHT ABOUT HOW I COULD TELL YOUNGER ME IT ALL WORKED OUT#IM FULLY TWEAKING RN ITS 3AM I SHOUDLNT BE AWAKE#SOMEONE HELP ME#WHAT DO I DO#lovely talks#lovely vents#exsistential crisis
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all this talk about wanting to fight bosses in their prime in the dlc is so annoying istg. “i want to fight prime godfrey” brother that was prime godfrey he isn’t getting any stronger. just go fight him rl1 with no stat boosting and a +0 weapon. there you go, prime daddy loux.
#it’s like the whole pre nerf radahn bs#yeah cool you fought him when he still had trash hit boxes congrats#literally they didn’t even nerf him they just fixed him#and accidentally tweaked his health in the process but they put it back to what it should be in the next patch#the way folks talk about it you’d think he was a completely different fight#the funny thing is though i still remember ppl complaining like fuck about him before that fix#anyway would really rather not have repeat bosses from the main game#especially the main bosses#imagine waiting two possibly three years for a dlc only to fight the same guys again but this time they have a few new attacks#besides you just know that if they add bosses from the main game it'll be things like tree spirits or avatars lol#or more watchdogs and godskins#oh god lets not speak that into existence#elden ring
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