#I wish I had access to a dissociative identity disorder friend group

[panicdeleter]

the unfortunate experience of having dissociative identity disorder diagnosed young is that I go to a fucking psych hospital tell them I have DID and they just, don't believe me. I had fucking Fuge. Motherfucking fuge. Nowhere online can I even find a description of what fuge looks like during the process other than "bewildered wandering" and these psychs definitely got the abnormal psych class at the local college that I've been told by someone who took the class "doesn't even mention the disorder" so my *absolutely has had dyskinesia like 6 times because my first doctor gave me 5mg of abilify as a 5 year old and wrecked my brain* having ass bitch got put on antipsychotics and because I was also age regressed out the ass, and totally disconnected from reality and deep in some antichrist demon boyfriend fantasy (I have... interesting power fantasies when totally unable to cope that apparently just, took over? like I *was* the maladaptive daydream) yeah I just, I want to go on, I can't I don't have the energy to pop back three stages of disconnected connected thoughts. This is just, how I think. I had a point but the amnesia kicked in and now I'll have to walk back through the thought process to find the idea and pick it back up with a new thread of self. I feel like I'm mostly fragment and not even alter. It's fucking atrocious in here guys. I am sorry for the incoherency. I'm tired of doctors not knowing what this disorder even is while also contradicting themselves by believing they're capable of distinguishing between "true" and "false" did like anyone would honestly pretend to be like this... like BPD and DID... I've met several people diagnosed BPD and like, low and behold after a while of hanging out and just, talking about myself and them BPD, CPTSD, and DID all feel like a spectrum of the same fucking thing. It's the same shit. I have at least one friend who's a diagnosed autistic narcisist and she's *also* dealing with the same underlying shit. Like it's all fucking trauma. I'm fucking pissed about how little information there is about DID vs Schizophrenia and how people don't have enough training to recognize did.... which doesn't respond to medications and shouldn't be medicated in the first place... and it takes 5-12 years on average to get diagnosed. That's 5-12 years of intense psychiatric drugs. 5-12 years of being a fucking hostage to a system that isn't educated about you, being passed from psych to psych as they slowly realize they don't know what's wrong with you, from therapist to therapist as they say they *aren't qualified to help*, direct quote from a therapist of mine. I have no idea how to emphasize on top of this how exausting this all is. How much each intake appointment means ripping into your history of trauma and telling them your entire backstory as much as you can. Every bubble sheet filling how much you struggle. Every psych eval... after psych eval after psych eval. I must have had at least 20. I'm tired. This is a major injustice no one gives a shit about. It won't improve, because unlike autism we don't have marketable devices, unlike schizophrenia we don't seem scary or dangerous, unlike chronic illness we can't be scienced in imperical ways, we can't be examined through the lenses of biopsy and genetic testing... what little research is even out there is mostly about detecting "fakers"... when a commonly known symptom of did is dissociating about your dissociation. I want help. I really, truly want help. There just *isn't help*.

[libertymoon]

Have you ever heard of MyID?

MyID is the latest in medical and emergency services.

By Alantis Perkins sun, Oct 24, 2021

This quick product review is to simply raise awareness about some awesome products that could help you. I am not an affiliate or being paid to do this but I'd like to be. Please don't let that turn you off.

MyID is a medical service where first responders, caregivers, and medical staff can quickly pull up your medical information and records, during an emergency or a routine checkup and communicate vital information quickly.

"What do I get with MyID Plus?

For $1.99/month, your Plus subscription unlocks powerful features including Additional Categories, Document Storage, Sharing, and Text Alerts when your medical ID is scanned." - MyID

MyID can give a location when scanned to emergency contacts in the event of emergency.

MyID is also trying a new feature. This feature is called Prescriptive Discount Card. If you have it scanned at your pharmacy you could receive discounts on your medication and prescriptions.

Currently, their plan for a single person is $1.99 a month or $20.00 a year. Their family plan of 6 people is $4.99 a month or $49.99 a year. With both plans you get 30 days free trials. Or, there is the free plan that gives you the bare minimum of useful features.

Pro's:

MyID is a medical profile which can be accessed anywhere, anytime using Qr Codes, bracelets, sticker kits, wallet cards and an app on your phone.

It can be used to manage your medical information, save your life in an emergency, or clearly communicate important information to a health care provider.

Your emergency contacts can track the location of your emergency.

Prices are affordable.

Paramedics are trained to look for items such as MyID products.

They try new features beneficial to the consumer such as the prescriptions discount card. They're trying many more new features in the future.

Very easy to use and configure.

There is a online community that you can get involved with and discuss various things such as healthcare, medication, providers, etc.

HIPPA compliant

Cons:

MyID is a fairly new company and their customer service is a small group of people; meaning they can't handle large amounts of inquiries and requests at one time.

When I made an order for Cindy a friend of mine, an order separate from mine, her order never arrived. I communicated this to MyID after a dozen tries by email and phone. We even had to use different email accounts to get and keep their attention. Cindy's order is still being resolved.

In comparison to the MyRoadID:

MyID has an easier accessible medical profile with the use of Qr Codes, apps, etc. While based on the MyRoadID's website, MyRoadID has less easy access to a medical profile. Every second counts when saving lives. However, MyRoadID has put special attention on their products. MyRoadID has a wider selection and more variations than MyID in terms of products. With more time and successful sales, MyID will likely close that gap. Now in terms of website design, MyID has the better website design. MyRoadID's website isn't as intuitive and you have to mess around a bit before you find what you're looking for.

I have type 2 diabetes, Asperger's, and Dissociative Identity Disorder. With my disorders it's possible for emergencies to happen anytime and repeatedly. Emergencies like getting lost and forgetting who I am, passing out in public and perhaps in traffic on the crosswalk, or just having a serious meltdown where first responders have to get me home or to the ER. These are just some scenarios that would require the support of MyID. It has definitely help me, especially in doctor appointments where I need to communicate information from memory, which my Dissociative Identity Disorder makes difficult when I dissociate or switch with another alter. So it's great for me and other's struggling with similar issues. I really wish MyID would step up their support team game and product selection and variety. I know it's tough on them but still I can wish.

Other scenarios I can think of is for folks who struggle with dementia, children who get lost, type 1 diabetes, the elderly, etc. This product is versatile that way.

Make sure to check them out.

GetMyID.com

MyRoadID.com

Stay tuned for our next product review.

[devillainsarchive]

fkingdom - mr robot verse [ mild spoilers for mr robot ]

verse tag - my new modern verse. please let it be known even if your character is mentioned that does not mean in anyway do you have to adhere to the role OR follow things exactly. Mr. Robot has alot of death and I am not going to force that on any characters.

Carlos Oscar de Vil, son of Cruella de Vil, though he rather you not know that. You can search her on the internet and get article upon article, picture upon picture. But the only mention you will find of him is his name on her wikipedia page. Most of that is thanks to Carlos himself, but also his mother wishes she didn’t exist. Carlos keeps his presence online small, that’s what happens when you are a hacker, you don’t trust anyone.

Carlos’ childhood was far from normal, Cruella’s abuse however was something he saw as normal. He wasn’t normal. With a brain too big, an absent father, and an ever present cousin named Diego, its hard to have a normal childhood. Evie helped, and later Mal helped to. Two childhood friends. They made school normal, well they tried to. All three of them were affected by Auradon Group, a conglomerate that is everywhere, and has their fingers in every pie. Run by Adam, or as he is known the Beast, the company is ruthless, and covered up a cancer scandal that killed Diego, Evie’s dad, and someone in Mal’s family too. 

Carlos and Diego were close. He was like a dad. He opened a computer business, it was small but effective when he got sick and was fired from Auradon group. He took Carlos to see movies. He also “pushed” Carlos out a window. But asking Carlos to really remember any of these events is not something that is successful. He forgets things. He forgot Mal for example.

Its been a few years since high school though. Its all forgotten, he made himself forget. But that’s fine. He’s in therapy now because he got angry and broke things at a server farm at his lost job. His therapist is a bit stupid, but she can’t help it, she’s more like a fairy godmother than a therapist though. She’s got her own problems, be conned by a guy cheating on his wife for example. She doesn’t help much though, he still sees people, one in particular. He still does drugs. He still feels alone.

His current job is at Cyber Heroes was gotten for him by Evie who was a manager he was just a tech. Cyber Heroes has a big client, Auradon Group. Carlos is one of the techs on the case. Doug, Evie’s boyfriend who has an unhealthy obsession with Josh Groban, and is a bit stupid if you ask Carlos, also works at Cyber Heroes. He wants them to be friends, Carlos is fine with them not being friends. Among the leaders in Auradon group included Chad, he wants to be CTO, chief technology officer. He’s close, but a bit aggressive in what he wants.

A hack happens on the servers that Cyber Heroes are supposed to protect for Auradon Group. Yen Sid the CEO of Cyber Heroes has Evie call in Carlos. They can’t fix the problem on sight so they go to the server farm. Carlos finds the source of the hack, but its odd. The signature is fKingdom. He wants to delete but he can’t. He reroutes the server so only he can access and monitor it. Everything is fine, and he must find out what fKingdom is. He finds as much as he can, but there isn’t much. There isn’t much until Mr. Robot shows up, and has Carlos follow him.

fKingdom is a hacker group, one of the best in the USA. The best because of who they have doing the work. Mal, Harry and Jace Badun (cousins not brothers), Freddie Facilier, Anthony Tremaine, Mr. Robot, and him if he can be convinced. Mr. Robot tells him some key information, things to add into what he already knows to take Beast down. He reluctantly agrees.

He puts together a new packet with the Beast info. When the meeting about the hack happens, and Beast tells Evie to leave because she is not up to speed, Carlos decides to take him down, instead of turn fKingdom in. He still sees people following him, so he goes to his next door neighbor Jane, he doesn’t like to think of her as his drug dealer, but she is. She’s really nice, he likes her. He’ll take her to a party later, they’ll go on dates, and be boyfriend and girlfriend. And then he ruined it because her drug dealer Hades, is an absolute ass. He ruined it, and he has to forget Jane.

He confronts his therapists boyfriend, and steals his dog Dude. Dude is not well trained at all. The thing to know about Carlos he doesn’t want to hurt people and the more he digs into fKingdom, the more that happens, he knows that is going to happen. Mal calls him a dumbass about it.

Chad wants Carlos at Auradon Group, Carlos can’t do it. He asks if he can think about it because that’s better than a no. He cannot join the evil guy. It doesn’t work like that. Chad is still trying to get the CTO position, he and his girlfriend Audrey plan something together. They will figure something out, and will do whatever it takes. To bad it doesn’t work the best and Chad is implicated and then he disappears.

fKingdom in the meantime is working on a big hack, a hack to end Auradon Group for good. Carlos has to enter The Moors, the most secure and well equipped data protection center in the world. He gets in through manipulation of a few employees, help from Mr. Robot, and his alias Smith Close. Its tense and Carlos nearly fails. The hack happens and things start happening, but they also start to go downhill. Anthony is found dead, and his mother Lady Tremaine, who is in the process of moving doesn’t realize her packing material leads the FBI and agent Li Lonnie to nearly discovering fKingdom. Thankfully Lonnie, rules out Anthony’s cousin Dizzy from any fowl play. Carlos prefers it that way. Dizzy is innocent in all this.

The Lost Revenge, a remote Hacker Group who has been helping fKingdom the whole time through the help of Mal’s boyfriend Ben. They are stirring. More importantly their leader, a government official named Uma to the public, but Pirate Queen in the hacker circles, is moving. With the help of her trusty second hand Gil, they make moves publicly to help potentially save Auradon Group, with their government’s interests in mind.

Carlos is not doing well, he remembers Mal, after an event he rather not. He also remembers Diego, and realizes its Diego he’s been seeing which makes no sense because Diego is dead. Dude eats a computer part, which leads to Carlos getting arrested. After all Dude is micro-chipped.

Jail is hard for Carlos. There are so many things going on. He meets Jay, who is actually working for the Pirate Queen, but is deep under cover, and the two form a bond. Its a strange bond but Jay has Carlos’ back. The warden Facilier, no relation to Freddie, Carlos made sure, has Carlos do some hacking for him. Not the good kind of hacking. The kind of hacking that Carlos does not want to do and it nearly gets him killed among other things.

Meanwhile Evie is working on using the released information from Beast to renew the law suit that they failed years ago because of such a big cover up. She goes to Maleficent, or that’s what everyone calls her, its a lovely last name, one of the best defense lawyers in the business who worked on the case before. They come up with a plan. A plan which Evie tries to move forward on her own. She does so by getting a job at Auradon Group. But things are happening even if they are not how everything is supposed to go.

Carlos has not heard from Chad since the night of the big hack, and it worries him. Audrey hasn’t either, and when Carlos tries to confront her it backfires a bit. But she is dealing with her own problems, namely problems that Chad left behind but it will all work out. Thankfully she still has funds, she was one of the few that actually does.

Mal covers for Carlos being gone. And continues on fKingdom’s plans. The first is to uproot Leah, the head of legal at Auradon Group. Its done with ease. The next is to make a fool of Auradon Group which they do. After all chief officer burning 500k in the streets makes a statement. A statement that is reiterated on live TV, with a situation Evie will likely never get over.

Uma gets Jay, and her clean up guy Harry to get Carlos out of jail. But she has so much more work to do. So much more work, and so little time. She only cares about Carlos. So she sends Gil and Jay to clean up the rest of the mess of fKingdom. Harry and Jace are gone in a flash, and Freddie is framed. Their families hate Carlos. But Carlos wants to make it right, Freddie had a sister though, Celia. And she puts things into perspective for Carlos, they go from hating each other, to not hating each other in the course of a very hard day. She stops Carlos from making bad decisions.

Things begin to steam role the FBI is onto them. Lonnie meets Mal and takes her in. Yen Sid has an unfortunate ending after threatening to turn Carlos in for the hack, even though he doesn’t remember much of it. And Carlos accepts that he has dissociative identity disorder. His therapist asks to meet Mr. Robot, or Diego, and he says its a bad idea. It very much is, but Diego meets her anyways.

Harry has to clean up so many messes, including one at the FBI which puts Lonnie in a new and difficult position, and everyone pisses him off because of it. Mal has Leah meet her unfortunate end, and the list goes on. Hades comes back too.

Let it be known this is not a tale of happily every afters, those were the price for saying Fuck the Kingdom.

[devillain]

verse: mr robot : fuck the kingdom [ mild spoilers for mr robot ]

verse tag - my new modern verse. please let it be known even if your character is mentioned that does not mean in anyway do you have to adhere to the role OR follow things exactly. Mr. Robot has alot of death and I am not going to force that on any characters.

Carlos Oscar de Vil, son of Cruella de Vil, though he rather you not know that. You can search her on the internet and get article upon article, picture upon picture. But the only mention you will find of him is his name on her wikipedia page. Most of that is thanks to Carlos himself, but also his mother wishes she didn’t exist. Carlos keeps his presence online small, that’s what happens when you are a hacker, you don’t trust anyone.

Carlos’ childhood was far from normal, Cruella’s abuse however was something he saw as normal. He wasn’t normal. With a brain too big, an absent father, and an ever present cousin named Diego, its hard to have a normal childhood. Evie helped, and later Mal helped to. Two childhood friends. They made school normal, well they tried to. All three of them were affected by Auradon Group, a conglomerate that is everywhere, and has their fingers in every pie. Run by Adam, or as he is known the Beast, the company is ruthless, and covered up a cancer scandal that killed Diego, Evie’s dad, and someone in Mal’s family too.

Carlos and Diego were close. He was like a dad. He opened a computer business, it was small but effective when he got sick and was fired from Auradon group. He took Carlos to see movies. He also “pushed” Carlos out a window. But asking Carlos to really remember any of these events is not something that is successful. He forgets things. He forgot Mal for example.

Its been a few years since high school though. Its all forgotten, he made himself forget. But that’s fine. He’s in therapy now because he got angry and broke things at a server farm at his lost job. His therapist is a bit stupid, but she can’t help it, she’s more like a fairy godmother than a therapist though. She’s got her own problems, be conned by a guy cheating on his wife for example. She doesn’t help much though, he still sees people, one in particular. He still does drugs. He still feels alone.

His current job is at Cyber Heroes was gotten for him by Evie who was a manager he was just a tech. Cyber Heroes has a big client, Auradon Group. Carlos is one of the techs on the case. Doug, Evie’s boyfriend who has an unhealthy obsession with Josh Groban, and is a bit stupid if you ask Carlos, also works at Cyber Heroes. He wants them to be friends, Carlos is fine with them not being friends. Among the leaders in Auradon group included Chad, he wants to be CTO, chief technology officer. He’s close, but a bit aggressive in what he wants.

A hack happens on the servers that Cyber Heroes are supposed to protect for Auradon Group. Yen Sid the CEO of Cyber Heroes has Evie call in Carlos. They can’t fix the problem on sight so they go to the server farm. Carlos finds the source of the hack, but its odd. The signature is fKingdom. He wants to delete but he can’t. He reroutes the server so only he can access and monitor it. Everything is fine, and he must find out what fKingdom is. He finds as much as he can, but there isn’t much. There isn’t much until Mr. Robot shows up, and has Carlos follow him.

fKingdom is a hacker group, one of the best in the USA. The best because of who they have doing the work. Mal, Harry and Jace Badun (cousins not brothers), Freddie Facilier, Anthony Tremaine, Mr. Robot, and him if he can be convinced. Mr. Robot tells him some key information, things to add into what he already knows to take Beast down. He reluctantly agrees.

He puts together a new packet with the Beast info. When the meeting about the hack happens, and Beast tells Evie to leave because she is not up to speed, Carlos decides to take him down, instead of turn fKingdom in. He still sees people following him, so he goes to his next door neighbor Jane, he doesn’t like to think of her as his drug dealer, but she is. She’s really nice, he likes her. He’ll take her to a party later, they’ll go on dates, and be boyfriend and girlfriend. And then he ruined it because her drug dealer Hades, is an absolute ass. He ruined it, and he has to forget Jane.

He confronts his therapists boyfriend, and steals his dog Dude. Dude is not well trained at all. The thing to know about Carlos he doesn’t want to hurt people and the more he digs into fKingdom, the more that happens, he knows that is going to happen. Mal calls him a dumbass about it.

Chad wants Carlos at Auradon Group, Carlos can’t do it. He asks if he can think about it because that’s better than a no. He cannot join the evil guy. It doesn’t work like that. Chad is still trying to get the CTO position, he and his girlfriend Audrey plan something together. They will figure something out, and will do whatever it takes. To bad it doesn’t work the best and Chad is implicated and then he disappears.

fKingdom in the meantime is working on a big hack, a hack to end Auradon Group for good. Carlos has to enter The Moors, the most secure and well equipped data protection center in the world. He gets in through manipulation of a few employees, help from Mr. Robot, and his alias Smith Close. Its tense and Carlos nearly fails. The hack happens and things start happening, but they also start to go downhill. Anthony is found dead, and his mother Lady Tremaine, who is in the process of moving doesn’t realize her packing material leads the FBI and agent Li Lonnie to nearly discovering fKingdom. Thankfully Lonnie, rules out Anthony’s cousin Dizzy from any fowl play. Carlos prefers it that way. Dizzy is innocent in all this.

The Lost Revenge, a remote Hacker Group who has been helping fKingdom the whole time through the help of Mal’s boyfriend Ben. They are stirring. More importantly their leader, a government official named Uma to the public, but Pirate Queen in the hacker circles, is moving. With the help of her trusty second hand Gil, they make moves publicly to help potentially save Auradon Group, with their government’s interests in mind.

Carlos is not doing well, he remembers Mal, after an event he rather not. He also remembers Diego, and realizes its Diego he’s been seeing which makes no sense because Diego is dead. Dude eats a computer part, which leads to Carlos getting arrested. After all Dude is micro-chipped.

Jail is hard for Carlos. There are so many things going on. He meets Jay, who is actually working for the Pirate Queen, but is deep under cover, and the two form a bond. Its a strange bond but Jay has Carlos’ back. The warden Facilier, no relation to Freddie, Carlos made sure, has Carlos do some hacking for him. Not the good kind of hacking. The kind of hacking that Carlos does not want to do and it nearly gets him killed among other things.

Meanwhile Evie is working on using the released information from Beast to renew the law suit that they failed years ago because of such a big cover up. She goes to Maleficent, or that’s what everyone calls her, its a lovely last name, one of the best defense lawyers in the business who worked on the case before. They come up with a plan. A plan which Evie tries to move forward on her own. She does so by getting a job at Auradon Group. But things are happening even if they are not how everything is supposed to go.

Carlos has not heard from Chad since the night of the big hack, and it worries him. Audrey hasn’t either, and when Carlos tries to confront her it backfires a bit. But she is dealing with her own problems, namely problems that Chad left behind but it will all work out. Thankfully she still has funds, she was one of the few that actually does.

Mal covers for Carlos being gone. And continues on fKingdom’s plans. The first is to uproot Leah, the head of legal at Auradon Group. Its done with ease. The next is to make a fool of Auradon Group which they do. After all chief officer burning 500k in the streets makes a statement. A statement that is reiterated on live TV, with a situation Evie will likely never get over.

Uma gets Jay, and her clean up guy Harry to get Carlos out of jail. But she has so much more work to do. So much more work, and so little time. She only cares about Carlos. So she sends Gil and Jay to clean up the rest of the mess of fKingdom. Harry and Jace are gone in a flash, and Freddie is framed. Their families hate Carlos. But Carlos wants to make it right, Freddie had a sister though, Celia. And she puts things into perspective for Carlos, they go from hating each other, to not hating each other in the course of a very hard day. She stops Carlos from making bad decisions.

Things begin to steam role the FBI is onto them. Lonnie meets Mal and takes her in. Yen Sid has an unfortunate ending after threatening to turn Carlos in for the hack, even though he doesn’t remember much of it. And Carlos accepts that he has dissociative identity disorder. His therapist asks to meet Mr. Robot, or Diego, and he says its a bad idea. It very much is, but Diego meets her anyways.

Harry has to clean up so many messes, including one at the FBI which puts Lonnie in a new and difficult position, and everyone pisses him off because of it. Mal has Leah meet her unfortunate end, and the list goes on. Hades comes back too.

Let it be known this is not a tale of happily every afters, those were the price for saying Fuck the Kingdom.