#I’m horrendous at describing why I like characters tbh I am so sorry

[clydesdonovan]

Butters!

jeez these are all so long so again I’m gonna stick em under the cut fksjdkf

Why I like them: I feel like it’s hard to NOT like Butters tbh. He’s such an adorable little sweetheart. I know there’s always been times where he’s not a sweetheart lol but overall? He usually is. He has some killer one liners and his subplots are always either funny, or cute, or both. I’m happy he became a more central character as the seasons went on and now I can’t imagine the show without him being a +1 to the main four.

Why I don’t: he can be pretty terrible sometimes and I’m not a big fan of that :( he always had his moments and he was never an angel or anything. But I feel like, back in the day, his good qualities outweighed the bad, and the “bad” were honestly just normal schoolyard bully behavior. Current Butters is a whole other level and I just find him a little too mean and gross and unlikable at times.

Favorite episode (scene if movie): honestly Butters has so many good episodes… “marjorine”, “raisins”, “cartman sucks”, “the ungroundable”, professor chaos”, “super fun time”, “going native”, “the Simpsons already did it”, “a boy and a priest”. So many. My top two are definitely “marjorine” and “cartman sucks” though!

Favorite season/movie: I’d have to say season six I think!! It’s one of the first seasons that heavily focuses on him iirc, and we get to learn a lot about him as it progresses. It also has the birth of Professor Chaos and starts to develop Butters beyond a one-off, one dimensional character.

Favorite line: his entire speech at the end of “Cartman Sucks” for sure!!

Favorite outfit: I looove the pink sparkly vest he wore when he was tap dancing! iirc he wore it (or something similar) at the talent show too. I also honestly love his Professor Chaos costume, it’s adorable. Vamp Butters is also iconic!

OTP: bunny!!! I love them.

Brotp: honestly Butters and Cartman fksjdk their friendship is so wacky and troublesome but it’s really funny. Episodes that center around them usually are very good and entertaining and they’re just absolutely wild together

Head Canon: Butters is amazingggg at art. He can draw, he can paint, he can sculpt, he can create things out of paper cutouts (I’m not sure if there’s a term for that?). He’s always doodling here and there but he’s one of those people whose “doodles” are beautiful sketches with colors and shading and everything. Painting is his favorite art form though! He paints all the time.

Unpopular opinion: I wouldn’t call this unpopular I don’t think?? But I prefer the older, sweeter characterization of Butters. He’s become something of a fan favorite with his newer personality, and I do like that he takes less shit and he stands up for himself more often. But I miss when he was the most childlike of the kids, and he was friendly more than not, and he still held a naive wonder about the world. He was a really sweet kid and I just prefer him that way than now. Modern Butters can be too much sometimes :/

A wish: this isn’t gonna happen but I’m still holding out hope for a Victor Zsasaz thing with future Butters fkskdkf

An oh-god-please-dont-ever-happen: hmm I think he’s pretty safe from most bad things since he’s such an integral character. However I would like it if he didn’t keep down this path of becoming like… Cartman 2.0 that he’s kinda been on lately. One Cartman is more than enough

5 words to best describe them: sweet, creative, friendly, sensitive and radiant :^)

My nickname for them: I don’t have one I don’t think? but I mean Butters in itself is a nickname 👀

[teacup-baphomet]

G/t Drabble (Crash landed on a hostile planet trope but NOT via the a tiny vulnerable human in a planet of mean powerful alien bigs route)

tw: a bit of censored cursing. Uh. I’m not sure what else. Maybe broaching of sensitive tops such as sexuality and religion. But not really. Mostly it’s just rlly dumb word play/lame humor and a confused alien being confused (and kinda freaked/troubled due to the confusion? you’ll see if you read it i guess). there is some sad lorg boi times. idk. no romantic relationships. just a shaky friendship is forming between a crash-landed big-arse alien (a human! *gasp*  i woulda never guessed something as vile as that o: ) and one of the much smaller, very much not human locals. most want to kill the poor dude who got stuck on this planet of hostile lil guys who think he’s a monster and immediately decide they much off him asap. so like having this one ally is kinda important to him. But it’s hard. because. lots reasons rlly. culture differences. the language tech can only do so much. the size diff creates definite issues because trust is hard in general. and trusting a big being that could easily cause havoc on your planet mostly just cuz he /seems/ nice is not a very good foundation... there is much to learn between the two before they can be truly good frens. so uh good luck to them lol *raises glass* I mean. I don’t think I’ll ever write these two again. but I’m sure they’ll end up good friends. probably.

Anyway without further adieu, here have a disappointment (read: attempt to be creative but i’m kinda lazy tbh and still kinda bitter I can’t draw for more than like 10 minutes before I start spacing out :/ )

"We are called humans or the scientific name is homo sapiens" spoke the large alien, Lyle.

"Homo sapiens? That is rather long, is it not? Why is a "scientific name" even a thing? Why would that be necessary? Scientific name versus what kinda name? Emotional name? Why are these science names two words? Seems annoying. What is wrong with just calling yourselves simply homos? Or something else just as nice and concise. Straight to the point if you will. Probably. I... Uh.. I obviously don't know what exactly is the purpose of a scientific name as i already implied... Sooo..." The much shorter – and much scalier- native being (called Torrynts) awkwardly looked off the side to stare at the plain, blank, siding of their dilapidated, isolated house as if it were the most interesting thing in the entire vicinity. Which it wasn’t of course. There was a f***ing alien 15 times their size only a few them-sized lengths way…

 Lyle gave his new comrade – and only friend on this gawdforsaken planet that mostly wants him dead- th pondering, and possibly ironically, rather colourfully scaled Torrynt by the name of Kyvlar a bemused look, bordering on coy.

"Huh. 'Straight' to the point you say?" He paused with a small snort. "Well, my not-so-statuesque friend, do I got news for you~"

Kyvlar suddenly blanched, giving a Lyle a look that was like a knife to the heart while blurting out. "Wait, wait, wait! Hold up! We? There are more than one of you? Here? On this planet? Were you just a distraction the whole time. Oh... Oh no.... Have we really been victim a secret homo invasion this whole time! I-"

 Their panicked monologue was interrupted by a most horrendous noise. Like a slowly dying tornado with the hiccups or something.

"STOP. Stop I-I can't. I can't. This is too much much!" Spoke Lyle with his hand covering the bottom half of his  and his eyes scrunched shut.

 'Welp,' thought the Torrynt, 'This is the end. This is when I die. I should have known better than to immediately put my trust in such an enormous obviously dangerous specimen. Ho-'

 Kyvlar’s dramatic internal speech was interrupted when the alien surprised them by uncovering the his face, revealing a huge grin. ‘They weren't upset? Huh?’ The Torrynt blinked owlishly at the human in confusion.

 "Sh*t, bite-size (Kyvlar noticeably paled at the impromptu nickname not 100% the foreign joking tone, well it would have been noticeable to someone their size at least), I know you don't mean to, context-wise, but you reminded me of my great aunt Karen when my Uncle Todd and Uncle Copper decide to have their friends over along with relatives for a gatherin'."

Plastering on a faux distraught look and blatantly mocking tone, he  continue with exaggerated hand gestures. "Oh no, it's the...the...," he paused with snort, "... the homo invasion... No, no, no... Not here... not in this... this good, Christian neighborhood. Aren't just two of them enough? Oh woe is me!" The alien dropped the mocking tone and smirked towards the smaller being. "Heh. Good ol' great aunt Karen could never remember Uncle Todd was Jewish and so was the majority of that neighborhood.... It’s where my Uncle Todd was raised actually…"

 The said smaller being just stared blankly at the homo-no-human they supposed as just “homo” meant something else, they weren’t sure what else, beyond just something else.

 "Uhhm. Wh-what? U-Uhm, so what exactly is “homo” then? And what’s Christian? And Jewish too. What’s that? Are... Are those other types of -uh- intelligent, sentient creatures on your planet? Y-you know, b-beside hom-er-h-humans? Or are these subtypes of humans? What kinda are you? What is a great aunt? or Uncle? Does the great indicate a larger size? Oh gawd, a-aren't you humans b-big enough regularly? Oh... W-wait. O-or are you a great- uhm- great aunt, was it? E-er, g-great something? Ohhh. Zyntall (Torrynt swear). I'm sooo confused r-right now... " The timid tiny being, sighed in frustration before their eyes snapped open wide in a panic, and they did an immediate one-eighty with their behavior, and it was off all their previously trust, as wavering as it was, vanished in an instant, squeaking out a quick "sorry. oh, Z-zyntall... I'm so-so-sooo sorry. I-I hope I d-didn't offend y-you or anyth-thing... p-please, oh please, don't hurt me" while gazing everywhere except towards the much larger alien, hoping desperately the 'bite-size' nickname was just a bad joke...

 Clearly they not only didn't get what so hilarious about the whole thing but also thought he was a monster prone to violence – still. Lyle sighed, all the mirth that was previously in his expression draining out of him leaving him with an uncomfortable grimace on their face. How disappointing... They really wish there was another human here to share in the jesting. But alas, that was not meant to be. At least as far as they knew there was no "homo invasion" in the making. Lyle wasn’t naïve. He knew humans were easy to slip into a gray moral state, at best. The role of villains at worst. And many of his kind would likely take advantage of a planet full of tiny, vulnerable people. Lyle couldn’t help but inwardly cringe at the thought, getting nervous about something that wasn’t an issue. At least now. Currently, human-wise, it was just him on this distant planet. And as far as he knew, no one - well, no other human at least- had any clue where they were. It probably just seemed he simply disappeared. Never to be seen again most likely. Trapped on this random alien planet in scenario that is akin to some sort of a personal hell of sorts.

'Wow. Hello, major depressive episode that’s making me overly dramatic. I haven't seen you since I was - what - eighteen?' thought Lyle regretfully. Calling this planet a personal hell was probably a bit over the top. But still, he couldn’t even seem to keep the trust of his single native ally. It only adds to his feelings of lonely isolation. And he feared his lonely angst will only get worse and worse. But only time will tell.

Giving a small sigh, he mentally prepped himself to try and get back his small friend’s trust. At least he was able to laugh for a wee bit earlier. It had been so long since he had done such. It was nice. Hopefully next time it will not lead to a backtracking in his attempted friendly ships with an open local, or even worse, a hostile local. The little laser guns that native being had stung like a b*tch. It reminded him when he got bit a couple times by some fire ants during a vacation as a child.

-----------

So yeah these were rando improvised characters made on the spot.

But Lyle is a guy (he/him. He’d be chill with they/them too)

And Kyvlar is… a Torrynt. So like they/them I guess. Torrynts don’t have genders. Like at all. I guess they hermaphroditic (intersex if talking by human terms but not really as they are capable of reproduction and they aren’t human so… I dunno… Not even sure if hermaphrodite is a useful term. As idk if hermaphroditic animals, in nature, are capable of reproduction… I don’t think so? But I’m not sure tbh…). There is no variants like there are with human “sex”. And male/female concepts are 200+% foreign to these wee reptile-like aliens (albeit warm-blooded minded, so perhaps more draconian than reptilian idk. Also aliens being described as reptilian gives me hives due to a conspiracy theory that is like super bigoted actually n’ stuff. Very yikes. Don’t want to talk it about it rlly…). Their reaction would def be “wtf. That’s the weirdest sh*t ever” to such a thought as male n female binary dynamics & whatnot. No exceptions. They’d be like why a lot of you guys limiting yourself because of whether or not you are a potential offspring vessel or not. I don’t understand.

So Yeah. Uh. Anyways.

Their conversation about this prolly (or close to this):

Lyle: Hi. I’m Lyle. Just some random dude form Earth I guess.

Kyvlar: a random dude what?

Lyle: uh. I’m a dude. I guess I meant that I’m a boy though dudes don’t really have to be boys I think. But not to derail too much… Yeah. I’m a man/guy/boy/brosef, whatever you wanna call the male gender. Please not by brosef actually, heh. Anyway. Yep. A boy. That is what I am. Uh. How about you. I can just tell… you ….you have uhm two legs. Oh damn. Wait. That sounded so stupid. I wouldn’t assume your gender or anything. I just… You don’t look exactly human so..uh. UGH. Nevermind. I don’t even know where I was going with that... Heh. ANYWAY, so yeah what’s your gender is what I’m trying to say. Sorry I’m awkward as f***. I’m not used to socializing much. Been doing deep space sh** on my own for a few years now and.. uh.. yeahhhh….

Kyvlar: *stares blankly*

Lyle: Uh. Yeah. So. A Gender? Do you, uhm, have one? Or…????

Kyvlar: Uh. I think so? I mean I’m mostly a day-by-day I’ll figure it out then type but I, I really want be able to fix my home up. I want to learn to cook. Kinda suck at it now. Uhm. I guess… Uh. I should probably help you get on good terms with my people so they stop trying to kill you. You seem nice n’ stuff… so yeah. There’s that. I could use a little more purpose in my life. Not to-

Lyle: wait. Huh? What are you talking about? Are you talking about an agenda?

Kyvlar: Yes????

Lyle: *snorts* I didn’t say an agenda. I said a gender. As in A. Gen. Durr. Like are male or female or maybe something off the typical binary track??

Kyvlar: Uh. Er. Huh??? I, I’m so confused right now…

Lyle: Hooo boy. I’m so not prepared for this discussion at all.

-----------

One of these days I’m gonna have a character that’s silver-tongue and smooth af and not some bumbling awkward doofus (*cough* like I am *cough*).

[cowardsanctuary]

(heads up! i talk about content that’s potentially triggering in this post. the content itself contains body horror, blood & gore, and disgusting mischaracterization of Test Tube.)

(if you’re on desktop, press J to skip! if you’re on mobile... scroll really fast? i am unbelievably sorry)

i don’t have an amino account but there’s like, this comic on there called Inanimate Experiments that is unintentionally the funniest thing to me. here’s the first 25 pages, but like. while it’s supposed to kind of be a horror comic, it just has a LOT of moments that are so bizarre (idk how else to describe it) that i just laughed out loud.

personally, fanworks that depict Test Tube as a mad scientist who ignores her loyalty and caring towards her friends are fanworks i don’t really care about. but this one wins a special place in my heart because, well, (images, spoilers & more under cut!)

cruelty is very bad, but i’m honestly. super detached. so seeing lightbulb just get FUCKING DEMOLISHED on the THIRD PAGE is the FUNNIEST FUCKING THING!! like! what did we have to prepare for this? where did this COME from? why is test tube so wildly out of character? what a goddamn mood tbh.

i just. god. the timing for everything is unintentionally the funniest thing to me and? while it’s good to be snappy? my brain IMMEDIATELY interprets everything as a punchline to a joke.

like. what the actual hell. this is hilarious, mostly because it’s so simple and to the point. you know when character 1 is like “you have to do x!” and character 2 is like “i’m not doing x?” and then the shot immediately cuts to character 2 doing x? this is JUST THAT, but it’s ALSO compounded with THESE panels in the previous page:

THE IRONY. THE SET-UP (earlier in the same page). what the FUCK. why can’t i be this funny? what the hell?

like. test tube fused them together for an unethical experiment but. this is like Shaun of the Dead levels of funny, as unintentional as it may be. it’s unintentionally genius. (if you haven’t watched shaun of the dead: it’s a normal zombie movie played as a comedy, using GENIUS direction in terms of cinematography, shots, and most important of all, comedy. there are some shots that are genuinely scary, but more often than not you’ll be busting a gut with EVERTHING. there’s so many callbacks to literally everything, and the director, Edgar Wright, is absolutely phenomenal. i don’t know how a stereotypical horrifying experimentation fic somehow ascended to this level of comedy, but it just. did.)

and the way they characterize test tube, as horrendously wrong as it is, is just. holy SHIT. she delivers so many fucking poignant one-liners and they’re all funny as FUCK, and occasionally metal as shit. what the hell?

it’s like they took the stereotypical mad scientist trope, gave test tube back her sense of humor, and then dialed it up to an 11. i can respect that.

and even OTHER characters get a taste of this too. the dialogue in this is just. really fucking good. the creator has no right to be this good at humor.

you were making FUCKING juice??????? you were MAKING? FUCKING? JUICE?????

and oj ACCEPTS THIS. mostly because he’s tired. AND THERE’S A FUCKING PICTURE OF BOW IN MEMORIAM I AM SHITTING MYSELF

everyone has baller joke lines and it’s the best and worst thing ever. i hope this isn’t just my sense of humor being morbid??? because i genuinely think this is the funniest goddamn thing.

the later pages get more serious and i can appreciate the somewhat realistic concerns of test tube. but also? if you told me this was supposed to be a parody of a horror comic played straight i’d believe you. i just lost my shit at almost everything. god, what a comic

(hey! i personally hate it when someone talks about my stuff in a way that feels derogatory. i’d really appreciate it if someone could share this with the creator, RockstarPB! i don’t know if they have a tumblr account, so i kinda need a middleman. this post was meant in a light-hearted manner and while it pokes fun at the comic, it was not meant to insult the comic nor the creator. if they want me to remove this content, please let me know and i can do so. i can also do a detailed critique on it because i’m a Freak, but i also will not do that without RockstarPB’s express permission. thank you!)

[iamthestrangerinmoscow]

1, 2, 3, 4, 8, 12, 14, 16, 17, 18, 19, 21, 22, 24, 26, 27, 29 Sorry I am curious (answer at your own volition)

Lol it’s okay, it’s not like I have anything better to do right now (tired beyond words…)

1. what is your sexuality?

I’m bisexual. I chose the label bisexual over pansexual because I don’t feel like I’m “gender blind” - I’m attracted to different things for different genders (tbh I also chose it because of the pun making opportunities).

2. what do gender do you identify as?

Eh it’s kinda complicated. I think “male-aligned genderqueer” describes me best, but I actually wouldn’t object to being called a genderqueer man (or a genderqueer FTM). It’s hard for me to define.

One version is that I’m really nonbinary and male/man is how I can describe where I see myself in society and how I know my body is supposed to be like. Another version is that I’m partially male and partially genderqueer. I don’t know and I don’t really want to label it beyond “male-aligned genderqueer”.

3. how long have you been aware of your sexuality/gender?

With sexuality, I started using “bisexual” for myself at the age of 15, but I’m pretty sure I already experienced sexual attraction at 13 and if I learned that word back then, I could have started using it then. I know I’ve had crushes on boys and girls before puberty, and I was consistently attracted to both men and women from puberty. So it wasn’t hard to figure out.

With gender, kinda more complicated. In childhood, there were signs™. During puberty, I’ve started feeling dysphoria, but I didn’t know such thing existed so I couldn’t know what it meant. I’ve learned that transmasculine people existed at the age of 16 (wow right?? representation matters) and started questioning gender pretty soon after that. I think I started identifying as nonbinary when I was 17, but I don’t remember very well.

4. do you have any preferences?

Yeah, but they aren’t strong. I’m more attracted to women and nonbinary/gender ambiguous people sexually, and more attracted to men romantically. I’d say it’s about a 40%/60% split for both.

8. how do you feel about lgbtq roles in media?

I’m pretty chill, but I do think representation is very important. The only reason I found out bisexuality existed is through House MD. If I saw a trans man on TV as a 13-14 year old, maybe I’d figure it out sooner. And I won’t even talk about how important it is for both LGBT+ people (validation and support) and others (visibility and education).

12. what sort of advice to have you lgbtq teens?

Don’t give up. I know you are tired of hearing “it gets better” - I was tired too. It made me so so angry. However, as hard as it is, sometimes the only thing you can do is wait. Build strength, support yourself with kind, accepting people, and don’t lose hope. No matter how bad it seems, it won’t last forever.

Being questioning is hard. Being in the closet is hard. Coming out is hard. Dealing with queerphobic people is hard. Living in the world today as a LGBT+ person is hard. But you are strong enough to survive every single thing because guess what? Every horrible thing, every heartbreak, every bad day so far… you have survived it all. You will survive *this* too.

14. how do you feel about the term “coming out” ?

Considering it’s short for “coming out of the closet”, I think it’s pretty accurate. Closets can be dark, lonely places, but they are also safe. If you know you won’t be in danger, coming out might be great - but if you have to stay in that closer for some time, it’s okay too. So yeah, I think the term is pretty good.

16. any tips on coming out?

Don’t have expectations, I guess? Really though, being prepared for acceptance and not getting it is horrible. Preparing yourself for hate and conflict is horrible too. So just don’t have expectations. Go into it thinking “I know I will be physically safe [because you should be! don’t come out if you aren’t] and I will deal with anything else as it occurs”.

Also don’t rush it, please. You will know when you are ready. Coming out when you aren’t ready can be so hard.

17. what’s your biggest pet peeve when it comes to lgbtq characterization in media?

LGBT+ characters getting killed at disproportionate rates is the biggest one. Horrendously inaccurate representation is the close second.

18. what’s your favorite parts of lgbtq characterization in media?

LGBT+ characters being accepted and supported by friends, family and other random characters. It makes me cry happy tears. Also smashing those damn stereotypes. Also gay jokes.

19. what did your teachers say about the lgbtqa community in school?

I won’t talk about school cause yeah… bad memories.

My uni seems to be pretty liberal though. I haven’t heard many opinions, but I was pleasantly surprised at anthropology. The anthro prof talking about gender, sexuality, monogamy and so on was very investing, and validating. And I haven’t heard a single homophobic/transphobic thing from any other professor. So yeah, mostly it’s great.

21. what’s an absolute turn off for you in the opposite/same gender?

Lol for the sake of simplicity let’s say men are the same gender for me and women are the opposite gender. For men, genuine cruelty, aggression, etc - I can’t, it just scares the shit out of me. For women, being passive and complacent - idk, it just makes me sad. I guess for both, it’s the extreme performance of traditional gender roles…

22. what’s an absolute turn on for you in the opposite/same gender?

For men, not being afraid to be emotional/vulnerable/human (not to the point of being passive though, don’t like that in anyone…) and also sarcasm/dark sense of humor (idk why I don’t like that in girls…). For women, being sassy or just funny, and also being badass (um guess who has a crush on Buffy the Vampire Slayer). And for anyone: being passionate about something, doesn’t matter what.

24. how do you feel about the term “queer” ?

You can fight me on this but I think it’s a great term. Maybe cis gay men and cis lesbians don’t need it, but for pretty much anyone else in LGBT+, it can be so useful. Like, do you expect me to explain to everyone that I’m a bisexual transgender male-aligned nonbinary person? Cause it’s much easier to say “I’m queer”. I understand that it used to be a slur, however it’s not the same as some other slurs and has been reclaimed. So I’m pro using it.

26. favorite lgbtq actor/actress?

Kristen Stewart and Stephen Fry, if I can only choose two.

27. any tips for heterosexual and/or cisgender people on how to handle lgbtq events/news?

Mmmm… be respectful, I guess? You can totally take part in events and discussions, just don’t talk over LGBT+ people and remember that their voices are more important in those cases.

29. how do you feel about receiving questions about your sexuality/gender?

I don’t mind it. There aren’t many places where LGBT+ people can feel relatively safe in a community of people who share their experiences, so I’m all here for taking part in discussions and sharing my thoughts.