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journalsouppe · 1 month

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hi! i just found your blog recently so apologies if you've already answered this, but (if you remember) how did you get into journalling?

Hi no worries! I don’t think I’ve answered this before!

The short answer is that back in 2021 I realized I had a super unique opportunity to record all my experiences becoming a Zelda fan for the first time as I had not consumed anything Zelda my entire life. I got a small pack of pens and washi tape and a themed journal and a Zelda sticker book and just had so much fun that I’ve expanded! I now have all types of stickers, post it notes, stamps, washi, etc that I’ve collected over the years as well as starting a new journal for all video games I play! It’s been a great outlet for me to not only write but understand design choices and practice freehand lettering, and to support all my favorite artists who sell stickers. It’s been such a fulfilling hobby I genuinely recommend it to anyone who’s interested.

The long answer is below as well as tips to get started! (Sorry it got pretty long fdslijf)

So part of it was that for a long time I’ve always wanted to get into journaling but nothing would stick: I tried daily aesthetic bullet journaling but got burnt out, I tried journaling things retaliated to exercise but it wasn’t as creative as I wanted it to be, etc. I even used to rewrite all my notes in college to make them look nicer and more legible (and to also review all the notes we took in class) but that was just homework and not stress relieving.

Then back in 2021, I was going through a some major life events during my senior year of college and had to step back from doing a lot of things I normally would, especially social things. So I ended up getting back into video games which is smth I hadn’t had the time to do since…. Junior year of high school I think (With animal crossing being the exception bc of course). I always wanted to get into Ocarina of Time so I played that and Majora’s mask (more specifically I watched someone play them ^^;) and realized I had the golden opportunity to record my experience getting into the Zelda community and games as an adult since I had never consumed anything Zelda previously. I believe I started journaling when I was almost done playing (I did actually play this time) breath of the wild so my first true live reaction spread was a link between worlds. And it was so fun writing down all my commentary, I felt like my own personal let’s play YouTube channel where I could look back at all my reactions and thoughts to games.

I wanted the journal to be special so I got myself a new pack of pens, a journal that’s themed to Zelda (it ended up being a shitty journal fdkshlfd but I still love it), an “official” sticker activity book based on all the official art from the 3d Zelda games, and some cool tone washi tape that had gold accents (aka green blue and purple designed tape). And I just fell in love with journaling. I discovered zines around that time so I ended up collecting more and more stickers and stationary to put in my journals and then I wanted to play more games than just Zelda so I got another journal to continue writing there! I even have new journals in the future specifically themed to final fantasy and castlevania to start when I finish Zelda. I also decided I love journaling so much that I plan to open up a shop to sell journaling stickers and eventually book bind my own journals. It’s still a work in progress but that’s just how much I fell in love with my own style of journaling.

It wasn’t until I played the great ace attorney (DGS) where I really appreciated these spreads as I was losing my shit through live reaction entries. I talked about that spread online and my first dgs mutual ever encouraged me to post it… and I had fun doing that so I made this side blog and kept posting. I’m shocked at how many people like my spreads! I prioritize them being for me first but I will do extra things to make them nicer for yall such as not getting sloppy with my hand writing, taking nice photos, and typing up all my words so that they’re more accessible to read. It’s been such a fun journey I can’t recommend getting into journaling enough. You don’t have to even post them online like I do.

If you’re ever interested in journaling, my advice is to do what YOU want to journal. You don’t need to start out with buying super fancy materials or anything, I got a couple of materials since i knew that I wanted to invest in this journal but you can use any pen or sharpie you have at home and just write. You could even draw images instead of using stickers or use highlighters and markers you’ve collected overtime from school to add that pop of color by highlighting words that speak out to you. If you have a printer, you could even print out images (not fanart!!) from the games you play, my oracle of seasons and oracle of ages spreads have printed and hand cut out paper of the sprites from the game.

Don’t watch any aesthetic ‘here’s my daily bullet journal spread’ videos, you’ll get intimidated and if you try it you’ll be burnt out. Journal at your own pace, I dedicate a day once a month to set up like 4 spreads so that whenever I play games I can just jot down my thoughts and keep my journal just next to me when I play. I also don’t force myself to play games all the time so it’s nice having this nice pace to journal when I want.

Find a topic you’re interested in, and just write about it! Could be games, movies, bugs, theme parks, shoelaces, literally anything. Anything that’s a YouTube video can be transformed into journal spread. Find a journal that you have at home or if you want to splurge a little find one that speaks to you in a store! My only advice is that you want the journal to have thicker paper so that none of your materials bleed (make a test page at the back to make sure what bleed and what doesn’t before you start!) and to have strong binding. My Zelda journal has thin paper and a glue binding and omfg I’m stressed about her exploding.

I don’t want this to get crazy long but you’re more than welcome to dm me or my main blog PumpkinSouppe if you have any more questions too! Or feel free to send more anons here I don’t mind! The world of journaling is such a great place where you decide how the world is structured and how you want to live in it, so don’t feel pressured to do something that you know will exhaust or drain you. Tysm for the ask!! ^_^ sorry this got so long fhdljsf

#ask #anon #journal #bullet journal

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docholligay · 9 months

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House in Fata Morgana: The First Door--1603

I have never reviewed a visual novel before, but @iscahwynn made me a very generous offer and a long line of patience, knowing that we are trying something very new. To that end: Please don’t spoil me for the game at all! If you are reading this, I have only gotten through the part written above, and I don’t want to be corrected, even if I’m wrong, even if I’ve missed something, i don’t want to have anything confirmed or denied, and I don’t need any trigger warnings or extraneous explanation. Iscah would like my pure, naive experience of the game. Thank you!

Non-Spoilery: Holy shit, I don’t think I have consumed a visual novel with this kind of fervor. In fact, the only other visual novel I think of where I was like, ‘I have to keep reading what happens” was We Know the Devil, and while I would say that game whups on this one prose-wise (I can’t relate to a lot of what people love about WNTD, but holy shit was the prose some of the most beautiful game stuff I have ever read. I wished the whole time it was a short story or novella instead. Still do!) this one has a lot of plot driving through it and the writing is also very strong--I am used to a certain amount of ‘anime gotta anime’ writing styles, and there is none of that here.

Spoilers below

I love a story that rewards patience. I could see some people saying that this moves too slowly, but I like to read a Meaty Tome, and so it doesn’t bother me to have to deal with a certain amount of setup, especially because I know this is a collection of short stories, sure, but it’s a collection of short stories taht are all driving at an ending. It might not even be fair to call them short stories so much as…episodes, maybe? I don’t know, they are connected but years apart. I guess i’m actually spitballing too much for having actually not played beyond chapter one.

So i am 98.6% sure we are in England (please don’t tell me!) Given the references to the Thirty Years’ War, the Golden Age, and winter being a rainy season, all packed into one. Also Rhodes is a British name. I might be wrong but I would be surprised if I were.

How do I organize this “progress reviewlet” or whatever I want to call it? Let’s just go with the flow.

Again, I love that this is unvoiced. It makes the game read so much more like a book to me, which makes me consume it voraciously, and also doesn’t take me out of the moment. Intensely aware that I am in the minority here, but when I’m reading something that I think probably takes place in late Elizabethan England, and I’m hearing Japanese, it takes me out of the immersion and it’s more like watching an anime, which is fine but doesn’t light up the same center of my brain, generally. Actually, the same would be true if it were English. I can’t mainline the story and let it play out in my mind the way it does when I read it. I read this like I do a visual novel, I barely pay attention to the art except in the “where is everyone standing” way, and that’s not even very helpful for this. So in reading it like a book, I feel like I saw Mell slap Nellie, I feel like I saw the light cross the White Haired Girl’s face as she failed to strangle Mell. It just makes the whole thing more immersive for me.

Speaking of Nellie, what a wild ride that was. I mean, we knew something was going to be up with Nellie’s level of spoiled when we heard that they removed the thorns from the roses in the garden so she would never be pricked. In that moment, we learn something about the fact that Nellie doesn’t understand what consequences are, she never learns that the things we may want can hurt us. And so she keeps going for the exact things she wants, and she has no sense of danger or of the need for pragmatism, or anything beyond the desires and whims of a spoiled child.

It truly says something about the quality of the writing that pretty much my most hated squick came up and all I could do was go, ‘Oh girl what happens next” and just kept clicking. I mean, the game very much tips its hand to it, it is not trying to shock you because that’s not the sort of game it is. It wants you to understand that this is who Nellie is and of course this is how she’s going to act.

But for as monstrous as she is, you feel for her, or I do, when she says, not wrongly, that she was only ever, a “a doll for the family to play with”

The idea of paintings being alive, of being changed as they are painted, that really stuck with me, and I know the painting was the small mystery within the bigger ones contained within the game, I can’t quite get anywhere with it, but I do agree that paintings have a quality of life to them. This is why it could be some future girl, it could be Nellie, it could be another person in another time.

So witches. Let’s talk about this. I know that we have a lot of cross talk about the white haired girl, and if the white haired girl is the witch she takes herself to be or if she’s a hidden princess. And then we have the maid. These two are the unnamed characters within the story thus far, and I know they must be unnamed for a reason, but I didn’t really take the witch thing on its face until the rose turned in her hand.

Oh, Doc, so you think there’s a real witch, and you think it’s the white haired girl? One, yes, I suppose I do and two, no, i suppose I don’t. Remember, the Maid is with her, and I’m also remembering the that the title of this game is The House at Fata Morgana, and I also know, being the one thing I know from the start being about fatas morgana, that they supposedly come from Morgan Le Fay, A WITCH.

So, I’m wondering if the maid isn’t the witch, and if she isn’t creating all of this as an illusion, and IF she is creating all of this as an illusion, how much of it is the facts of that matter? Or the truth? Those are different things, but related. Is it all created of whole cloth?

I mean, i feel like the game of the story has to clearly be about the White Haired girl and the Maid, I can look at a title card--OH SHIT AM I THE WHITE HAIRED GIRL?? (Please don’t tell me but do put a pin in it) that would make sense, we’re both the two unnamed characters, we’re on the title card. Hm.

Is it better to know something, or to be happy? I mean, this is basically the core question and thesis of this segment, and it seems to lean heavily toward no. Everyone was happier not knowing, except, i do want to point out, Nellie. I’m not arguing she’d be happy knowing, she’s not, but I do want to say she would be UNHAPPY in either circumstance.

I don’t agree with the maid that his error was his kindness. His kindness was not his fuckup. It was his desire, and his drive, that came outside of any thought of the family (especially rich considering how he lectures Nellie) to HAVE this girl who captured him in her own flame. She didn’t even mean to, like the candle means no harm to the moth. But kindness, no, kindness was not the issue.

But I do love when she says that we have to follow the paths we’ve begun to trod down. He can’t change any of it, and so he has to go forward.

In all, I liked this section, I have no idea how it will stack up against the others but I can see it laying building blocks for the future of the story.

While being cautious of spoilers, please, if you have any questions, i’ll try to answer!

#Doc plays games #commission review #doc plays the house in fata morgana

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in-my-feels-probably · 5 months

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Hi! It’s no worries I’ve been around this app long enough to know it’s kinda buggy lol. Anyways, I actually remembered just now I wrote out my request in a random google doc before I sent it and never deleted it so I have able to just copy/paste!

Congrats on 1.7k!! May I have a romantic hunger games (it can be either the original films or the newer one) option 2 match up please? I go by she/her and am bi with no preference, so any gender is fine.

I’m about 5’5, dark blue eyes, medium length hair thats kinda too dark to be dirty blonde but not so dark that its light brown with slightly lighter blonde highlights throughout. Ive been told I typically wear what would be considered 90s type of style but leaning away from more feminine things tho I’m not opposed to dresses and all.

I do get pretty anxious when thrown in certain situations rather that be talking to a group of people or just one person. But on occasion and definitely when I get to know someone I never stop talking. I am a ranter and rambler which means I could be ranting about something that happened and then start talking about something else that may or may not be related to the original subject. Basically I will always find something to talk about though I do enjoy listening to other people talk. I am considered the mom friend because I tend to be the most logical. Im also a very determined, stubborn person who usually is kinda pessimistic but still has a huge imagination. And despite all the anxiety I am usually a relatively confident person and am not afraid to take up for anyone I care about. Also I am pretty good in school despite having a kinda bad memory. Also an INTJ, Sagittarius, and Ravenclaw.

I absolutely love writing and have for the longest time rather that be random original stories I make up or the various fanfics I have(lol). I also love drawing and painting and recently realized I’m actually pretty good at making art related to animals and the occasional landscape. I’ve also been a big music fan since I was a kid, I honestly dont know what I would do without it. I also really enjoy reading when I get the chance, like I could spend hours getting consumed by whatever I’m reading. Which also travels into me when I’m watching things. As in I spend a good bit of time just binge watching new or old shows. I also really like walking around and enjoying nature. Theres a few nature trails I love going on and would go to the zoo every weekend if I had the chance. Which also goes along to my love for animals. Also I do like going to random places with my friends.

And thats about all I can think of to say, hope it wasnt too much lol. But anyways, thanks in advance :)

hi!

thanks for participating :)

since you have no gender preference, i’ll tell you who i ship you with out of both the boys and the girls, and then do the full thing for who i think you’re better suited for.

i ship you with katniss and peeta! i’m gonna go with katniss for this, hope that’s ok :)

katniss is absolutely not a people person. small talk makes her uncomfortable, and putting on a mask and playing a part doesn’t come easy to her. there’s a handful of people she’s comfortable talking to, and the rest don’t matter to her. she’d understand your apprehension getting to know people. but she’d feel pretty special when you opened up to her and started feeling comfortable venting and rambling. she may not be one for talking, but she does like listening. and you could listen to you talk for hours about whatever you wanted, happy to listen. you’re very alike as people. your values, your view on life, your temperament and your personality. you both being headstrong and stubborn could get in the way of your relationship sometimes, but you’d always manage to make her go soft around you. you’d be one of the few people that make her happy and help her feel relatively calm and safe, so she wouldn’t want to ruin that with petty arguments and bickering. you’d learn to work past it together quickly so you could get back to the simple things.

katniss doesn’t have much time for hobbies. plus, i don’t think she really allows herself the time to be idle. you’d have to constantly remind her to take a break and relax for a little while. she’d be too impatient for reading or art, but she’d enjoy hearing what you were reading about or working on. it would give her a sense of domesticity that she craved. and later on after the rebellion, she’d slowly start feeling more comfortable joining you with your hobbies and finding some of her own. i don’t think she considers herself to be a very talented person, but she would get a small sense of accomplishment and pride when she found a hobby she both enjoyed and was good at.

—

the place she’d most feel at peace would probably be the forest. walking along the streams, hunting for deer, just breathing in the fresh air. it would be a place she enjoyed going alone, but eventually, she’d start asking you to go with her. she’d show you all the best places she’d come to catch something or just clear her mind for a little while. it would be peaceful and quiet, which she’d love. one day, she’d ask you if you wanted to bring along something to draw with. she’d take you up to a ridge she liked to sit at, letting you sit down and draw the landscape while she hunted for a few minutes. eventually, she’d make her way back to you, sitting down next to you.

“no luck?” you’d ask when you noticed her coming back with a full quiver and no kill.

she’d shrug, setting down her bow. “found a few wild turkeys down by the river. some of the hens were nesting. i didn’t want to bother them yet.”

you’d nod, going back to your drawing. she hadn’t been gone that long, but you’d already made significant progress drawing the ridge and hillside that led down into the valley where the meadow was. you could feel her eyes on you as you worked, and you’d eventually feel her chin rest on your shoulder as you started drawing one of the trees, making you smile. you liked when she was soft like this.

“that’s pretty,” she’d murmur, fascinated by the way you worked. “peeta could’ve used you down at the bakery if he knew you could draw like this.”

“i wouldn’t want to upstage him,” you’d joke, knowing what peeta used to do took a lot of time and skill that only he could make look easy.

she’d chuckle, and you could feel her smile as she looked over your shoulder. “i don’t think he’d mind.”

you’d sit in silence another moment before deciding to take a break, setting your things down. you’d watch the ridge together, peering down through the valley where the spring flowers were just beginning to grow.

“you never told me we had flowers like this in the district.”

“they only grow in the spring,” she’d explain, resting her head against your shoulder. “my father told me the soot from the mines stifles them before they have a chance to grow. but out here in the meadow, they’re untouched. they can grow a few feet tall if they’re not harvested right away. you can use the roots for medicine…i used to bring prim some.”

you could hear the hurt in her voice at the mention of prim’s name. she’d grow quiet again, her eyes locked on the ridge. she was afraid if she looked over at you, she wouldn’t be able to keep it together. you figured it was best not to pry about it—not now, at least. instead, you’d pick up your drawing, handing her a few pencils.

“pick a few colors. i want to draw the flowers in too.”

she’d give you a small smile and nod, immediately reaching for the green pencil. you’d grin, setting the rest of the pencils down as you began working again.

“i should’ve known.”

—

thanks again for participating! i hope you liked this :)

#1.7k followers celebration #1.7k followers #1700 followers celebration #followers celebration #1700 followers #the hunger games #thg #the ballad of songbirds and snakes #tbosas #katniss everdeen

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foreverrunningfree · 8 months

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@czigonas wanted to see me answer those artist questions and I did them all so it’ll be under the cut

1. Art programs you have but don’t use?

As of rn I cannot draw on my laptop/tablet so technically paint tool SAI and photoshop(idk what version). But I guess I hadn’t used photoshop for /years/ back before my drawing hiatus. Sorry but SAI is so much nicer to look at and to use, for me personally.

2. Is it easier to draw someone facing left,right, or forward?

I flip flop my canvas a ton to a) look at it for wonkiness and b) to get specific lines in a direction that feels good, but the actual act of drawing I typically like to have them looking left cause most the the lines flow from top right to bottom left which is nicer to do since I use my right hand to draw even tho I am ambidextrous.

3. What ideas come from when you were little?

This question confuses me on what it’s actually asking soooo? When I was like 12 I had to write a story for school so I did a story about a plane crash in which the survivor came face to face to a rat/bat/cat/dog creature thing? I’ve always wanted to redraw the creature, idk if I have the original drawing I did and I don’t feel up to digging to see if I kept it during all my moves.

4. Fave character/subject that’s a bitch to draw?

My favorite animal color patterns aka brindle, merle ,roan, spots/stripes. So time consuming. In terms of shape, human faces for sure.

5. Estimate of how much of your art you post online vs. the art you keep for yourself?

Before hiatus, probably 90% /shared/. Currently, probably 75% /posted/cause I can’t post the porn to tumblr lmaoooo but I have shared them with like half a dozen friends.

6. Anything that might inspire you subconsciously?

I’m sure there’s a ton but if it’s subconsciously then how would I consciously know?🤔 ok serious answer, probably every single 2D animated movie or show I’ve ever seen, and all the various artists I follow. I mean, there’s parts of my style I can pinpoint you to what it’s inspired by.

7. A medium of art you don’t work in but appreciate?

I’ve never /seriously/ tried oil paint, acrylic paint, or pastels but that shit always looks so good. Also watercolor even though i have tried and enjoyed using watercolors but I am far far faaarrr from being proficient in them. Non drawing wise, I fucking love dioramas, especially those that are then filled in(?) with acrylic(?). I watch a lot of those videos on YouTube.

8. What’s an old project idea you’ve lost interest in?

Most of my old animal ocs I had in the same universe in my mind and had a comic planned that I never got around to. I still love and wanna revisit those ocs. But also my dragon age ocs who I’ve SERIOUSLY BEEN CONSIDERING drawing in @soaps-hoe-141 universe 👀

9. What are your file name conventions?

Before hiatus/ on my laptop, subject or character and whatever was happening in the pic. Now using procreate on my iPad? I don’t think I’ve named a single one lol.

10. Favorite piece of clothing to draw?

Nothing, no clothes, nude, nakedness please and thank you. lol but I guess I do sorta enjoy figuring out clothing in general, folds and shit, getting that practice in. Like how it hangs and creases in poses since I’m not used to drawing it.

11. Do you listen to anything while drawing?

I don’t usually listen to /only/ music while drawing, I much prefer having a favorite movie playing in the background and/or a show I enjoy rewatching/am actively watching. I also watch a lot of gamer YouTubers I put on as background noise/short watch breaks that their voice is just soothing to me even if I’m not /watching/.

12. Easiest part of the body to draw?

I’m not sure… maybe boobs/pecs for humanoids. General body shape for animals?

13. A creator you admire but whose work isn’t your thing?

Honestly can’t think of a single one. I mean, plenty of artists do work(or with a medium) that I can’t or don’t want to do/use personally but I read the question of “isn’t your thing” as “subject you don’t enjoy”. If that’s correct, then idk what to tell you. I don’t follow or remember people who majority does things I can’t enjoy on some level.

14. Any fave motifs?

Quite a lot of religious imagery I guess ex. Circles around a persons head. Less serious answer is drawing characters in meme formats lol

15. Where do you draw?

Please don’t tell any physical therapists I live like this… on my back on my couch with my head on the arm rest while holding my iPad propped up on my chest like 8 inches away from my face lmao

16. Something you are good at but don’t really have fun doing?

Idk???? I do shit for my own enjoyment so I’m not sure? Maybe perhaps backgrounds? Like I could do something decent if i wanted to but I’m not into it so I usually just don’t?

17. Do you eat or drink while drawing?

I take breaks… but while actively drawing? I often drink aka let the horny demons out while I enjoy whiskey lol.

18. An estimate of how much art supplies you’ve broken?

Broken broken? Next to fucking none? some charcoal sticks but otherwise…. None… I majority do digital art so really nothing to break there lol

19. Fave inanimate objects to draw?

Idk? I like doing life charcoal drawings? Of whatever, but particularly statues if that counts? I usually have living beings as my subjects.

20. Something everyone else finds hard to draw but you enjoy?

Ok, I hate this question, cause we are all good at different things. Maybe it’s just most of those I follow have different strengths than me???? But I guess if I had to pick, recreating from life(or picture) is a lot easier for me than some others(like making it life like/very accurate).

21. Art styles nothing like your own but you like anyways?

Yooo, anything I’ve reblogged honestly. Love everyone.

22. What physical exercises do you do before drawing?

Absolutely none, again don’t let the pros know cause damn. But I will do stretches or take breaks as needed.

23. Do you use different layer modes?

Absolutely. Mostly for lighting and shading but yes, if I’m doing digital imma take advantage of it.

24. Do your references include stock images?

Yes? I don’t really understand what it’s asking?

25. Something your art has been compared to that you were not inspired by?

Idk? I don’t usually get feedback of that sort.

26. What’s a piece that’s viewed a wildly different interpretation from what you intended?

Again idk? I guess my shit is straight forward?

27. Do you warm up before getting to the good stuff?

Almost never, again don’t let the pros know lol I do sometimes jump between pieces or start a new sketch before going to something farther along.

28. Any art events you have participated in, like zines?

Nope, wanted to and have tried before but I tend to NOT do something if I feel pressured to do it.

29. Media you love but doesn’t inspire you artistically?

Again I feel like this is a weird question or maybe it’s just my understanding of it but I can feel inspiration from all sort of artist shit even if it’s something I’ll never do(ex making a crochet animal or dioramas). I guess I can feel inspired to create from other creators even if it’s not direct inspiration/subject/medium.

30. What piece of yours do you think is underrated?

Underrated as in no one has seen aside from a few people irl would be my colored pencil pieces I did during afternoon naps when I worked at a daycare a few years ago.

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tlcartist · 2 years

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Thinking about how I consumed both The Lord of the Rings and JoJo’s Bizarre Adventure in the wrong order when I viewed them for the first time. LET ME EXPLAIN

So I grew up SUPER religious and there were a lot of things I wasn’t allowed to read or watch because it was considered “witchcraft”. Basically anything in a fantasy setting was off limits no matter how tame the story was. When I turned 15 I left the religion I grew up in and suddenly the world was my oyster. I could read anything I wanted! This was during the height of the LOTR films so I knew that was the first formerly forbidden thing I wanted to read.

So I do what any poor teen in the mid 00’s would do and I go to my local library. Problem was that, again, since LOTR was still really popular at the time every copy of the books in that series was checked out. Except The Return of the King. So I go sweet let’s go read this and I had literally no idea what was happening the whole time. It was a fever dream. But in spite of it all the book had my complete attention and, though I did realize my mistake while reading it, I was too engaged in the story to stop. I did eventually finish it and then went back to The Fellowship of the Ring and reread it in the correct order lmao.

JoJo was a different story. I’ve been a fan of anime in some capacity since I was a teen and I’ve known about JJBA for a really long time. I’ll admit it, I judged it pretty harshly before I got into it. The art style is just so insanely different than basically any other mainstream anime series and I didn’t get it. There were even a couple of times that I tried reading the manga but I noped out half way into the first volume because the art style was very 80’s and the writing was so over the top. Figured that was the end of it and that the JoJo fans could just keep it and do their thing but I was very much Not Interested thank u very much.

Then about a month ago I got the idea to try watching some anime that I’ve never seen before because I have plans to do anime conventions next year and I wanted to expand my knowledge a bit. So I thought, ehhh let’s try JJBA again. I’ll give it a couple episodes and if I hate it I can dip. Pull it up on Netflix and didn’t realize that it was playing season 5. I was confused because it wasn’t the setting or character that I’d read briefly in the manga but I shrugged and kept watching. And watching. And watching. I fell in love with Jolyne and the supporting characters. Needless to say that by the end of S5 I was thoroughly hooked and immediately went back to S1 and watched it in the correct order. I was so hooked that I watched all 5 seasons in a week and a half.

Moral of the story is don’t judge a manga by it’s first chapter and maybe doing things in the wrong order is actually a good thing sometimes.

#personal #listen #I’m dumb okay #JJBA worked out tho because I found Jolene’s character to be way more interesting than Johnathan and that’s what kept my attention #but imagine the first thing you see in JoJo being Ermes asking Jolyne if a guard saw her flicking the bean #because that’s what happened to me lmao

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sweetk1lls · 2 years

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Draco, Gemini & Apus for the constellation ask game!

‹ DRACO // : › [ Who’s your favourite character to write ? ]

This is very biased considering I have roleplayed xem on here the longest for bit over a year since I created xem from April 2021 to July 2022 before I left the RPC, but out of a few original characters who I had written for roleplay ( since I’ve never done any novel / project writing... YET! ), I highly enjoy writing this all encompassing and multiversal glitch, [ REDACTED ], also known as just [ ? ] for short, who is the protagonist of the Godly Trilogy along with the Consumer / You! The personality of [ REDACTED ] is literally everything and anything as xe has a whole different identity and life to each individual xe would interact with, so it’s extremely fun to write xem while xe is generally known to be unpredictable, comical and tragic all at once! Even xyr writing style is meant to be chaotic and overwhelming, just as xyr nature is. Here are of my favourite parts of roleplay replies I had written!:

1. Slowly, xe nods, understands how in the Universe, there has to be some form of an explanation for everything— from life to death, lightness to darkness, you and I with our existences. [ Though, I do not have mine yet. Please, be patient with me. I am trying not to make my explanation be of just swallowed stars and stolen shadows. ] A hum falls from the strangest ones and zeroes, this sound gently caressing reality, unholy blade right against its invisible skin.

2. Once, twice, forever, this conversation repeats. It does start differently again and again and again and again, yet, the familiarity in the moment that bears the exchange is still faint, dying— [ I am curious because I am meant to be, all paths lead to this, but in the end, I look at you, with all of your scars and stars, because I care about you. Fate will never have the privilege to write the reasons with my love. ] Xe shifts in xyr seat closer to him, gaze gentle as own scars all over xyr body softly glow white, this sight a reminder that he is not alone.

3. TO BE DEATH BOUND, ALL DARKNESS CONSUMED. Fate does not care about how much would one offer from themself to have a place they most desire in the Afterlife. ( The greatest heroes may still fall into the abyss and be turned into dead memories, the petty wrongdoers may still be brought to the paradise and make rain forever red. ) Fate will have the Universe only keep on expanding while growing hotter until it snaps, and there will be no poems and arts that are correct on how it ends. Though, regardless of where one goes after their death, is their final coming to peace unenough? It should be possible: Making a home out of Nothing , like the way the Demiurge can create Life from Emptiness. WE CAN BE SOMETHING MORE TOO. [ You have to not only pray and pray and pray for a better resting home, but believe, believe, be. ]

‹ GEMINI // : › [ What inspired you to create this project ? ]

I’ve always been fascinated with the concepts of humanity, identity, narrative / metafiction, religion / mythology / folklore, storytelling, the multiverse! There is so much to think about ( and be emotional over, lmfao ) relating to them that makes me very grateful that I have this life to get to experience and explore these things that are very inspiring and wonderful and interesting, so I combined them together to have this massive project. [ REDACTED ] actually inspired by me to have a project that is as all encompassing and multieverything because I want to explore every genres, types of mediums beyond just a novel, prominent and underrated character concepts / story tropes, just everything there is with arts and storytelling as I want to understand and appreciate them all!

With medias that have inspired me to do God Exits and the Godly Trilogy itself, the Adventures With Markiplier series has the most inspiring to me, especially Mark’s In Space With Markiplier that is not only a choose your own story, but it also explores different art styles, the gradual awareness of being in a story and loop, and having compassion even when everyone and everything wants to hurt / kill you. And then, Everything Everywhere All at Once also became another most inspiring media to me! ( Such a beautiful story that shows how love and hope are truly everywhere and can endure everything... )

Ultimately, I hope to have God Exits and the Godly Trilogy be a reminder to people of what life is and how we should come to appreciate it in our own healthy and kind ways before everything and everyone and everywhere comes to the end. <3

‹ APUS // : › [ What’s the hardest part about writing for you ? ]

I feel like the most writing related challenge I have is coming up with these ideas and then sticking to them. Often times when I write my oneshots or do roleplay replies, I just write whatever comes to mind after I have my beginning and end thought out, going with the flow more than making the ideas and following them. I’m not the best at sticking to original plans as if I do come up with any plans, I tend to change them when I’m indecisive as HELL before I just get frustrated and annoyed with myself sdgndsgkd but it’s okay as I know I’ll figure everything out in the end! cx

* SOURCE : CONSTELLATION ASK GAME //

#✨#isherwoodj #[ thank you so much for sending this in friend! <3 <3 <3 ]#[ giggling as Gemini is our sun sign heheh ùwú ]

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sponseredbybadlifechoices · 5 months

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I hate my art style, it feels too claustrophobic, I always have ideas but when I get anything out I either can’t execute it or my mind blanks, then there’s the absolute lack of motivation I’ve had the same sketchbook since like November 22nd and I am not even half way through with it, and the rotting ohhh the rotting

Rotting is just being in that stupide adhd x Depression combo where you have so much to do/want to do but physically can’t get up and do anything due to the affermentioned adhd and depression and so you lay in bed for the rest of the day or all day where you scroll through social media and are so consumed with everything that’s wrong with you and how stifling your room is and how much you want to go outside to a place you’ll only ever see in your daydreams and you’d give to be there or anywhere that isn’t here but you can’t because it’s not shower day yet and if you shower today you’ll have to shower on Monday which is the day you go back to school and you need to brush your teeth and floss because god knows when was the last time you did that

and you want to draw SOMETHING but doing anything is so physically and mentally taxing and when you ARE able to move to draw you can’t draw ANYTHING because despite having so much fanart and references and shit saved none of it inspires you OR it DOES but all your ideas are bad or your hand just can’t produce what it wants and it hasn’t been able to draw anything interesting and that wouldn’t be a problem because there’s so many filters you can use but you can’t utilize ANY of it because you have never been able to think outside the box or do anything interesting because you’re you and nothing you’ve ever drawn has been fucking worth it because it’s all so. Fucking. Boring. It doesn’t say anything new it doesn’t say anything interesting it doesn’t even make you think. At least before October it made you happy and you were actually satisfied with your art but you haven’t felt that feeling since September or July

And that’s another thing you physically can draw anything that doesn’t interest you, and that is heavy blow to your ego when literally NOTHING interests you anymore

When not even your old and dear hyperfixations can save you because you’re so beyond saving because you never had anything interesting to say even with your old interests and so you put your art supplies or iPad away and go back to your phone and you can’t even read fanfic cuz you’re not at school and that’s the on,y time your brain will let you so you go on twitter expecting to see gay fanart but nooo the past month has been full of just radfem bullshit or discourse that does matter yes but is not what you want to see and then you wonder why there’s so much radfem shit on your tl and ofc it’s because someone your following is liking their shit of you must’ve accidentally liked a tweet from a radfem and so now you’re thinking which tweet it was and reevaluating your ideals but you don’t know which ones because you don’t know which fucking tweet you liked that caused this whole downfall andyou just want your timeline to go back to fanart for shit you didn’t give a fuck about and updates on Palestine

So you goto tumblr but that quickly ends because you check all your faves blogs and the dashboard is so fucking boring so you goto tiktok which just, makes everything so much worse, cuz you’ll lay there scrolling through TikTok’s for fucking hours worsening the rotting and yet still being so goddamned bored despite every video but you can’t stop because watching something anything is better than laying there looking into nothing except your shitty fucking room with your queen sized bed tht takes up 90% of the room because your mom wanted the stupid thing to go right smack in the middle and you just wanna sleep upstairs again because upstairs has the most natural light with a big window facing the other apartments but your sister sleeps up there now and she never uses that window because “people can see inside” and you get that shes incredibly paranoid but you’re so fucking jealous and pissed off that she gets all that beautiful natural light to save her but she never fucking utilizes it while you’re stuck on the first floor where your room has two windows on opposite sides, one facing the patio the other facing the street and the patio window while great does not get the ray of sunlight that upstairs does and god knows I’m to scared of another face bejng on the other side of the street window and that’s why you hate the bed being in the middle of the fucking room. At least one of the reasons

Because if your mom could just move it all the way to the patio window you can get so much more natural light and a lot more room, but your mom doesn’t want to do that because of the stupid fucking matching drawers she got and how she wants our individual drawers on each side of the bed and you get it but godgodgod you fucking hate this lack of space how the bed is basically the entire fucking room and since you are absolutely awful at picking cleaning up after yourself there’s basically nowhere to walk and your mom complains about this and it would be so much easier if the bed was just on one side or if you just got a smaller fucking bed,

oh and because of that big ass bed if your mommy isn’t in bed with you you have so much more trouble sleeping like a fucking child but whatever it’s fine you just won’t bring up how much you hate this room you won’t get irritated when your mom always grumbles and huffs and puffs and mutters under her breath passive agressive shit about how dirty the house is because of you and you sister but she only ever does this in front of you so you’re the only one having to take the brunt of it and she’s right of course but it’s the muttering and the huffing and the fucking puffing that pisses you off so much and you just can’t stand it that you have to hold yourself back from splitting your moms head open with your bare fucking hands

And you’re still laying in bed but at this point you’ve sat up and looked at your side of the floor, except there is no floor there’s just all your shit and you can’t even see your floor and you wonder howd it get this bad when you just fucking cleaned it, will you get up and clean it? No! Because you’re so exhausted from either the day at school you had or from the entire week and you never actually heal from school even if you’re on break because you need so so much more time than 2 weeks or 2 days to repair everything and the only reason you survived the first semester is because you kept going and didn’t look back despite how the entire semester when you go home you just spend the rest of the day rotting and you continue to rot for the rest of the week and the weekend and the fucking breaks, and you think to yourself that taking these tiny little breaks will recuperate you just enough to keep going another week and it does but when you reach winter break you come crashing down amd don’t even get me started on how anticlimactic finals were and Christmas and literally everything despite Christmas being your favorite holiday every year every fucking holiday gets worse and worse but that’s not the point is it. Through the rotting although it recuperates you just a tiny bit what it doesn’t let you do is fucking draw like said before and drawing digitally/actually focusing on bigger pieces either traditional or digital is the most enticing part of the weekend or breaks.

But it never comes. Because youre too busy reeling from the day, week, hell months you’ve had and you’re so fucking depressed and it’s gotten so so much worse ever since school started again and you wish you could be one of those low functioning depressed people because they look like they have it so easy but they probably don’t and you’re being so fucking judgemental again but you just can’t help but there’s no one who publicly talks about these parts about their depression

And of COURSE they wouldn’t but you wish so hard someone would, because despite your selfish desires to be the only person to feel what you’re feeling when you get that “wish” and you don’t see anyone talk about it this way you feel so so alone despite you desiring that and you hate it you hate all of it and no one even knows that you’re struggling like this not even your therapist because you were so focused on surviving each week that you couldn’t focus on this slow burn decline and of course you had alot of other shit going on that were more urgent to discuss w your therapist amd even they noticed how you’ve been lower in mood and you noticed too. In your sessions you’ve been so much more tired and so much less your exuberant excited self. It’s not all gone of course you’re still your hyper fixated autistic self and you still get excited over your hyperfixations. But you’ve noticeably been more tired in sessions and probably outside of sessions but no one notices except your therapist and when they ask about it you don’t know what to say.

You’re so well aware of the rot and your art decline which coincides with your mental decline but you bring those up in passing. Because you don’t realize how bad the slow burn is, like putting a frog in water and slowly heating it up until it dies without realizing it. And this is all because you were convincing yourself that you couldn’t be this exhausted you don’t have math this year. And that’s what keeps you going. Not having math. And you notice, you notice how you’re still so so fucking exhausted but you tell yourself to keep going or how it’s not that bad because you don’t have math. This was supposed to be a better year for fucks sake but it wasn’t. And you can’t tell why. I got rid of the biggest contributor of my misery so why, why has everything gotten so much worse? Why have I gotten more miserable? Why has my art gotten worse? Less recognizable? So much more claustrophobic and boring and so so awful? It’s not fair

It’s so not fucking fair why do I have to go through this. Why do I have to deal with periods, why do I have to deal with boobs and a disgusting voice and hips and thighs of a fucking woman why do I have to deal with this body I didn’t even fucking want. Why do I have to deal with this mental decline. Why do I have to deal with my artistic decline while everyone else has “Highschool problems”. But you know that’s not true. You know your friends only want you to see what they can make light of, you know they’re problems are so so much deeper than they let on but you’re always such a vindictive and selfish person you think their problems aren’t as bad as yours and that’s so so untrue so you keep those thoughts in your head and ohhhh you can’t even get started on your physical pains your knee still hurts from when your dog and this German Shepard collided with it and it’s been months.

But it still hurts and when your at a dog park and a bunch of dogs start running at you you feel the panic and the indescribable pain you felt that day. But that’s not all, your knee hurts but it’s gotten to hurting your leg as a whole too, in your aerobics class you can’t do certain things anymore because your stupid fucking knee hurts too much and uts not fucking fair because it happened months ago so why why why fucking why does it still hurt. And then there’s the headaches oh the headaches and so much more health issues you can’t even fucking remember and the doctors did nothing about but make referrals to check SOME of them. But it’s whatever! It’s not like I feel like I’m constantly fighting for air when I’m at school, it’s not like the inhaler that I have barely helps it’s fucking WHATEVER.

And all you want is for someone to take you seriously, to not joke about any of this, to actually fucking see you but everyone is a emotionally stunted teenager and you can’t even blame them because you’re the one who constantly makes jokes and deflects and who can’t put your feelings into word

Until the last fucking second

When all of it has happened and will continue to happen

Who will save you from this fucking depressive episode. No one because you didn’t tell them anything but at least you’re writing it down now so next time you see your therapist you can finally. Finally. Work on this whole fucking issue

What’s the point of me going through this? The first half of 2023 while by no means perfect was such a wonderful time of artistic expression. And of course the rotting was still very very there at least at that time my art felt good. It felt amazing. Will it be like this again this year? An amazing first half and debilitating second half? Is it because of daylight savings? I wouldn’t be wrong in that assessment I’ve said multiple times how much night coming quicker severely depresses me. If I was somewhere that actually snowed I wouldn’t mind as much because then I can have a winter moment or fucking something butNO I got to be born in cali fucking fornia where there’s no seasons and by the time I move out there will be no seasons left in this fucking world because our world leaders and corporations will have fucked it all up

It’s not fair, none of this is fair. I shouldn’t have to deal with any of this, why me. Of all people, out of every person in this world. You could have given all this baggage to some rich person who would be able to make it all go away. But no. You just HAD to give it to someone in poverty! And not only that you made them trans and gay and to add insult to injury you gave them depression anxiety adhd autism and so much trauma they can barely function. What was the point of making me like this. I know I’m not kind to my ocs, but why did god have to be a 12 year old girl? Can she even hear me, does she even care. But blaming everything on an entity that isn’t even sure to exist is such a pussy move. Those to blame are those who have hurt me, those who made the school system like that, those who downplay mental illness. Everyone. Except me. Who’s to say all of this isn’t my fault, was I that bad of a child that I Inadvertently gave myself all of this

I hate all of this, I know I’m responsible for everything but goddamnit

This body this mind this psyche is so fucking repulsive these hands can’t even draw anything interesting. This voice isn’t mine. This face isn’t fully mine. This chest is not mine and never will be. These thighs and these hips are so woman like but I’m not a woman I’m a little boy I shouldn’t have this body I should no chest and tinier hips, less womanly thighs

And it’s funny because this body is that of a grown woman but this voice and face is that of a little girls. It’s disgusting. This almagamation of a child and adult on the cusp of being a woman but still just a little girl but I’m not I’m not I’m not I’m not I don’t want to be a girl I hate being a girl I hate it I hate it I hate it why do boys at my school get to be born as boys but I’m stuck in this mature body I didn’t want to start puberty at 11 I should’ve started at 13 or 14 or whenever cis boys start. Why do I have to develop early.

Why couldn’t I have it later, why couldn’t my mom put me on puberty blockers why why why I shouldn’t have had to deal with a puberty that was never meant for me. I need to start testosterone I need it so bad I can’t handle this anymore I hate being a girl I hate being a woman it was never meant for me. I want to be feminine in the way cis twinks are, do cis gays even realize how lucky they are? Will they ever? Being able to live comfortably in a body that was meant for you. Why do you get to have that but I don’t. You don’t deserve it. I deserve it. Why do I have to fight for everything that was given to you I hate this body so much i hate you so much I hate you I hate you I hate you

And how jealous I get when you and blue or literally friends I spend a lot of time w spend their time w other people. It's such a disgusting desire to want to be the only person that my obsessions ever talk to I hate it I hate it so so fucking much, and I want to be loved so bad and I am loved so why why is it so difficult to see that I am. Is it because of my immense depression and trauma that makes me feel like people don't mean it or my disassociation disorder that makes it feel unreal or.

Is it because my standard of love is so so high because I'm such an obsessive piece of fucking shit that I want people to practically worship and adore me. That I want to be the only one who matters in someone's life even though I hate HATE being the sole person who's focused on in a relationship? What is it that I want. is it in the middle? That I want to be the most important, fun, interesting and good friend anyone's ever known but they still have others that they love but never as much as they love me? Is that it Evan? You just want to be the most important person in the world to someone? But aren't you already? I am but it doesn't feel real, how can I know they're being honest Evan? How can I know that they're even real? How do I even do it Evan.

I know theres many people who love me and matt loves me so so much he's said it multiple times so what's stopping me Evan. What is preventing me from accepting it fully? Evan, it's your ego. That stupid good for nothing fragile wall that is your ego. That's the reason for all of this. But wouldn't it also be my disassociation? Evan, it's my belief they're connected.

Your disassociation was set up by your ego to make it stronger against the very real threats you were going through at home. I get that but, that can't be it can it? There has to be more factors in this, but so what if there is. All we need to know is that you'll never be capable of truly believing and feeling people's love

It will come to you sporadically, and you'll be able to fully believe you are loved. But it'll never be permanent. Yet you expect people to believe you when you say you adore them or love them, just like with people telling you they love you, but at least with your love you know it's true and while some moments feel more normal you'll always get those (much less) sporadic waves of adoration and worship. It's funny to me how badly you want them to cut you and hurt you and how badly you want to do the same. How you want to isolate them and yourself from everyone and have it just be you three.

You never want them to leave you, and who knows what'll happen if they do. It's not like you'd kill yourself of course, or hurt anybody. But I know losing them, due to their own decisions and not through death will break you. You'll never recover from it, or maybe you'll completely deflect from it and lead a normal life but years later youll sit in your apartment and it'll all come crashing down and youll be so useless and pathetic in those next few days, weeks hell even months. But that'll only happen if you're able to see them in real life right? I mean.

Even with your sister as much as you despise her you still love her. But no matter how much you love somebody I just, I can't see you being the type to really care that much when they die. You'll feel a gaping hole sure but, you'll maybe cry at the funeral and just move on. Or is it just that the ego wall with the disassociation has made you feel numb and nothing. Is that how you got through this semester? The "it's not that bad" and "gotta keep going" attitude mixed in with the numbness? It's late, you're not making sense Evan. But I will, once you figure out how to tie everything together. Just like you always do, my little starlight. I hope you die Evan. Y yo a tí, mí estrella

What a disgusting waste of two hours, how shameful am I undeserving and better left for dead. I'm glad you hope for the same thing as I do, even though you're just me talking to myself like some edgy freak. God we really don't deserve anything, I don't know why I'm still talking Evan. You're asleep, Matt's asleep. Evan when will I get to see you again, I know youre just figment of my imagination, the personification of my opposing thoughts. I'm surprised you didn't come as asuka, hell you don't even have a physical form just my name.

I'm still confused about what happened between me and asuka me, it was so much more... involuntary than what we did. It felt like a deep part of my subconscious was ripping me from the inside out, but you. You're just...you're what I'm used to I guess. Ohh three hours talking about all of this, what a load of bullshit matt is gonna wake up to. That one line about how bad this year was really just made me realize huh. Evan? I don't know why I want you to respond again, I know I probably can since you're not real.

Just a part of my thoughts, but I can't. I can't bring you fully back out like I did earlier, I can still hear echos of you calling me starlight but that's..that's it. Why aren't you coming back, wake up man come on you can't. You can't just leave me, you were supposed to keep me company while matt slept. Whyd you go back to my subconscious Evan, you should be here with me. with your opposing views, and shit. This is such edgy teenager bullshit, you're not even real. I hate you so much. More than anything. Is it because you're me? Or is it because you left me?will you come back to me soon Evan? What a shameful waste of three hours we are

#vent

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gothgleek · 9 months

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List 5 things that make you happy. I am getting to know my mutuals and followers (ू•‧̫•ू⑅)♡

Ahhh I’ve never gotten an ask like this before, thank you @hieronymph

In no particular order:

1. Concerts where everyone is having fun. There is something just so electric about the crowd scream singing lyrics, the performer smiling and having a good stage presence and people just having a good time. I love being part of a crowd where everyone is there to be in the moment and let loose.

2. Comments to my Art and writing. Whether the comments are good or bad, I love knowing that people have had an emotional reaction to what I’ve written. I’ve seen Art and stories that are okay but to find creations that you have to let the writer or artist know how much that piece means to you (or controversly, how much you hate it)? That’s special and I’m happy to be someone’s something special. I was an art history major so I’ve written essays about how I feel about artwork, good and bad and it gives me a thrill surprisingly enough.

3. When I get an update on a story or video. Rarely do I find something that makes me drop everything and consume it immediately. YouTubers, writers, podcasters, artists… it’s a good rush that gets me through the day.

4. Plus size sustainable clothes in a style I like. Fashion and clothing is a general category that I love but I have written so many essays about sustainable clothing so I go gaga if I find a way to commit to the goals and actions I’ve written about. Honestly I want to keep this short because I will write a 40 page paper about sustainable fashion.

5. Long talking sessions. I’m terrible at communication but I love talking for hours with friends through messaging or texts or video calls. I’m pretty isolated where I live now so on the rare occasion I get to talk to a friend my heart fills with joy.

#ask #mine

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nightroo · 1 year

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hellooooooooooo! It's been far too long since I posted any drawings here! I just finished my first year of uni (animation and game art course), and I wanted to share some of the better things I made in the drawing workshop.

The one above is actually the last drawing in semester one, where we learned about how to shade objects and materials. Things I already had experience in, but never learned in an academic way since I'm basically self-taught.

We had one class where we made collages and I really liked my results (the first one has text in Hebrew that says “end of eternity” or “end of the eternity”)

[idk why but it's not letting me put them side by side so this post is gonna be extra long sorry.]

we also had a few classes on patterns which I previously had interest with while designing clothes for characters in Daughter of Death, so I had books about it at the ready.

And of course some figure drawings

using multiplicity photos, that I’ve actually mentioned here before because I found them so useful for this type of studies.

There were also a couple of classes on faces and expressions, which is my comfort zone so I finished like 40 when we only had to do like 18 lol

(the expressions are with no reference btw)

and to finish the first semester here’s a drawing of shapes that took me 2 hours to shade because I chose the most time-consuming shading style on this planet apparently.

It doesn’t even look that good...

Anyways I’ll make a separate post for the second semester because this one is getting too long. It’s nice to be back tho

#original art #Art Studies #uni work #next post might not immediately come after this one bc im doing Stuff #(talking to my friends on discord)

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factpilot98 · 2 years

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sn33z3s · 2 years

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notes on contemporary south park fandom and its approach to fanon & headcanons

originally i posted this as a thread on twitter about a week after The Big Fix, in response to the various tweets i saw referring to tolkien as stan’s new best friend, how tolkien is now another character to visit tegridy farms before kyle (who hasn’t at all) and what that means for stan and kyle’s relationship, etc… this is just an observational post on fan culture and not so much a speculative piece about canon, so take from it what you will

a thing i tend to find within new (2015 and onward, i’d say) south park fans of the shipping fandom variety is this interesting way that some of them internalize overlapping character dynamics. beyond subjective shipping morality discourse, there’s a recent insistence of relationships “dying” out... and that is what i want to talk about in this post. warning: it got long, reader beware

for the record, since i got into south park and stan/kyle over a decade ago and have lurked around sp fandom on and off, i have seen folks say “style has died” in multiple waves, and each time i've thought to myself: they’re story arcs. character arcs. it all cycles. it’s reflective of weird insecurity to be like “characters A and C have interacted, therefore the dynamic between A and B is over now.” how so?

ultimately, my concern is mostly about projecting said negativity onto other fans (non-constructively). however, it’s not a Versus thing exclusively; that is, it’s not just some people being win-or-lose about “opposing” ships, it’s also present in how people talk about specific dynamics. like stan and kyle: “stan pines more” “kyle pines more” - is there a correct answer? their relationship shifts the way that sp as a show itself has. simply put, i feel like some fans react in a way that implies moments of canon entirely “cancel” each other out, rather than ~*containing multitudes*~ or such. it’s not that i don’t think there are concrete ways that stan and kyle (for example) “are” - i certainly do - but i feel confused by the one-dimensional approach to their relationship, among other things. i’m applying this to fanon details and ship wars, but i’ll elaborate on the second issue further in this post…

“stan cannot be a jock, because he is depressed, and likes board games and music.” “kyle cannot have androgynous features, because that’s the same thing as an antisemitic trope.” regarding both of these, i’ve yet to see a good argument as to how. i’m still not sure about the insistence on jumping to the extremes for both. i have a lot of feelings about the complexities of stan and kyle, but i see it flattened for silly reasons. this discourse is also decades old, but still. i like jock stan precisely because of stan’s docile personality. i like that kyle is hot-headed, yet very fussy, all the while. kyle via the post-covid specials is shown to be comparatively well-groomed, decorative, etc, to the other three. i’m not sure how that conflicts with his personality, though, as per claims by parts of this fandom. does it need to be any more profound than that? (i don’t like getting into the "why i think it's concerning that some fans strongly dislike masc-fem gay fictional couples" thing because it’s fundamental to me at this point, so i digress because i’m getting off-topic!) (also, plenty of masculine depictions of fandom kyle are antisemitic, but whatever)

anyway, it’s not that matt and trey aren't inconsistent; they are consistently inconsistent. still, i’d say they know their characters. they’re theirs. not to sound like an apologist (buzz word, i guess) or like south park has never made me complain, but this constant scramble to claim “i know what trey parker thought here, what he meant, and you don’t…” is not a healthy way to consume your media, and at that point, taking a step back to focus on other hobbies may be necessary. the truth is that none of us know: we are all just re-interpreting the art. i worry about the fans who reach the level of tin-hatting (a thing which we all do, by the way) that it encroaches into “i am demanding that the creators of this show give me what i think should be canon, and anything else is pure shit” territory

many older south park fans have already prodded this question (phenomenon?). still, my own reasoning for this personal catharsis is that now i’m active in the fandom and i’m seeing this and above all, i feel that after Return of COVID, it’s happening so much more often again, and i don’t understand why

indeed, what i’ve been wondering since becoming an active instead of passive participant in the south park fandom: why spend any time thinking or talking about what you dislike, anyway? if it is coming from a place of such negativity. why be competitive? why not just relax and enjoy? there are nearly 25 years' worth of multiple character interactions, all in fluctuation, with recurring themes. i think the COVID specials were some withstanding point of that. for the record, every individual in fandom reserves the right to critique the art as they feel is best for them, but i don’t mean stating “this is my critical opinion on…” i mean stating “i am asserting my opinion as fact, and i am getting angry and passive-aggressive on public social media when i see others expressing a conflicting take.” reacting to an outright attack is normal and justified, but taking any disagreement as a personal sleight indicates an unhealthy connection to the source material.

when i recently got called a “child abuse apologist” on tumblr for saying [in what was very obviously a self-aware and comedic tone] that i like stephen stotch, it supplemented my curiosity about some parts of the fandom’s ability to recognize satire and subtle dialogue or writing choices. twisting and/or ignoring elements of south park’s canon to postulate your favorite pairing as better is unnecessary because shipping can happen regardless of what canon provides. we have the ability to create the fan content we may feel is lacking. all dynamics in south park have a baseline. whether or not you read into these character dynamics romantically is up to you, but to vaguely refer to others’ ship- or character-related headcanons on public forums in a punitive(?) way is immature at best and downright worrisome at worst

i also saw recent talks about kyle’s choice to tell yentl that cartman gave him AIDS in that scene from Post-COVID instead of mentioning, like, cartman’s constant desires to imitate hitler and-or reinstate the holocaust… well, kyle said that because south park is a comedy, you guys. the plot of a thing can change drastically based on a single line, a single character interaction, and matt and trey only have so much they can fit within a time frame. also, it was just a funny thing for him to say. that’s kind of it

how upset one person “should” get about south park fanfiction or fanart is subjective, but taking to the streets over trey parker’s writing is a bit much, and to be specific, it’s a bit much when you say that “xyz interpretation is wrong, unless adjusted to apply to what i prefer, in which case it is right, and it is not fair game for people to say anything about the characters that i favor, though i will disparage other people’s favorites.” like, okay, let’s all go outside for a walk and some fresh air. being nice goes a long way

there needs to be a two-way relationship in fandom which allows discussion, disagreement, and civil debate on both sides. (well, i don’t know how i feel using the word “debate” like the south park slash fandom is “the marketplace of ideas” or what have you, but…) moreover, it’s basic empathy to understand that this is south park and, with the exception of actual online harassment directed toward other fans, people are allowed to express their discomfort over things that the canon itself presents as uncomfortable. i understand that we all make exceptions, but sticking to your guns and following the consistencies you apply to your fandom consumption is, like, the best way to not look hypocritical or spiteful

#mb tag later

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nyansense-the-nyanbinary · 2 years

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A big collection of art I’ve done for my BNHA star wars AU! I wrote up a lot of this stuff and drew it ages ago, but never got around to posting it

Figured I might as well seeing as I keep forgetting lol, also I’m going to make another post because apparently tumblr has a images-per-post limit lol rip

In order!

Grey Jedi Sentinel Master Aizawa! He adopts most of the “ducklings”, ie the kiddos, at his hideout after the Kamino disaster where Emperor All for One kills Grandmaster All Might (see this post) and becomes the Emperor. He’s been only tangentially part of the Jedi order for ages, and the hideout is an ancient former Sith temple, which is where he got the crystal forge he used to make his second lightsaber (and why it’s red.) He’s also not-married to Present Mic, who’s a former member of a non-Jedi force using order who left to be by Aizawa’s side after serious rifts in the order in question. Jirou is also a learner under Mic, and came with him--the other order’s equivalent of a Padawan (she’s not pictured here, I haven’t drawn all the ducklings). Their order uses guns and Force control to create sonic attacks and shields by manipulating the air itself.

Emperor All for One has the ability to consume and steal the Force power and connection of Force-users he kills, and also claims their lightsabers for his own. His collection is so mighty and extensive that he can shatter the Force to his will almost unstoppably...but the wounds he suffered from Grandmaster All Might’s last stand prevent him from doing much fighting with his physical body--he instead relies on force-throwing his lightsaber collection around, which is generally just as terrifyingly effective.

Harmonizer Hawks is Tokoyami’s teacher, and comes from another non-Jedi force using order who believe in the total separation of their light and dark force halves, using them entirely separately and in parallel. Harmonizer is the Master-equivalent title, and Tokoyami is a Learner, who still doesn’t fully control his dark and light sides. They traditionally use double-lightsabers, as they are technically an ancient offshoot of the Jedi order.

Knight Bakugou lost his master, Master Jeanist, in the Kamino disaster, and flourished under the much more Grey teachings of Master Aizawa. He uses Force pushes to great effect, and has an almost reversed dynamic with Deku--Grandmaster All Might chose Deku, and Bakugou has spent his training struggling upstream against the well-meaning but ultimately unfitting teachings of Master Jeanist.

Deku has inherited One for All, the spirits of every Jedi Grandmaster of ages past, and can bend the Force to earthshaking effect...when he succeeds at mastering the power. But All Might couldn’t finish teaching him before he had to sacrifice himself, and Aizawa doesn’t know how One for All works...so it’s up to him to figure it out and give people the hope he wants to grant.

Already covered Tokoyami earlier lol

Koda was a padawan under Master Wash, who died protecting him from Sith Inquisitors before Aizawa and co managed to rescue Koda himself. His master visits him as a ghost, one with the Force, but Koda still carries a great deal of guilt inside his heart.

Kirishima was a padawan under Master Crust before the Kamino disaster claimed his Master’s life and forced him to take refuge with the rest of the ducklings with Aizawa. His species has extraordinarily tough skin (technically he’s a different phenotype of Koda’s species! related, but distinct)

Padawan Uraraka is very skilled at Ataru style combat and is acrobatic as hell, and one of the best fighters of the Ducklings. She’s also a close friend to Deku

Snipe is a Mandalorian, and Pony is his foundling! He realizes after serious events that Pony is force-sensitive, and after killing multiple inquisitors because they sensed Pony’s force power, he realizes she needs a teacher who can teach her things that he can’t. So eventually both of them end up joining the duckling crew--Snipe is in fact the one who coins the nickname ducklings, referring to all the kids as Aizawa’s little ducklings following after him. Get one more responsible adult!

There are a number more characters, but I either haven’t drawn them or am going to elaborate in another post due to the image limit lol

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gunterfan1992 · 3 years

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Interview with Fan Artist loycos!

(Art by loycos)

So a few months ago, I was absent-mindedly scrolling on Tumblr (or was it Twitter?) when I came across something: an Adventure Time fan comic by an artist named loycos. As a person embedded in fan spaces, I find fanart like this all the time, but this time, there was something special about the art I was seeing. It was so... show-accurate!

I don’t mean that necessarily in regard to the art style (although it does feel right at home in the Land of Ooo, while still being its own thing with its own flourishes), but rather in relation to the characterization; the way loycos wrote the characters was spot on. She nailed PB and Marceline’s dynamic as former lovers who deep-down miss one another. She nailed Finn’s naive heroism and his one-sided crush on PB. She nailed Jake’s goofball energy. It was perfect.

In the past, I’ve only interviewed people affiliated with the show’s production, but I thought I’d mix things up a bit and reach out to some fan artists that I think are fantastic. As such, I’m delighted to share with you an interview I had with loycos, who answered my questions about her art, her history with Adventure Time, and where her work is headed!

What is your 'artistic origin' story?

[It’s] kind of a corny answer, but I've been drawing since I remember myself. My earliest drawing memories are drawing Clifford (the big red dog) fanart when I was around 5 y/o. I was always more of a "fangirl" artist, [and] I would draw characters from my favorite franchises to illustrate my headcanons and daydream scenarios I'd put them in. That hadn't changed one bit since. I had since gone on to study animation and illustration in official institutions which forced me to design characters and worlds of my own, but when I draw for myself it's always back to fanart (or studies). I don't have any OCs.

Are there particular artists or styles that you were inspired by and/or like to emulate or allude to?

I'd joke that my artstyle is just a mesh of all the franchises I've drawn fanart for over the years, but honestly, is it even a joke? I think you can easily recognize I had a Disney Phase like every other teenager (I didn't have an anime phase though! I know, I'm an anomaly) and [Steven Universe] definitely left it's fat mark on my style too. Out of [Steven Universe]'s storyboarding crew (which I followed very closely over the years) I especially love Raven Molisee and Jeff Liu for their wacky expressions and proportions, and of course Rebecca Sugar for their fluid and carefree lines. When it comes to art in general, I tend to prefer stylized, colorful and brushy styles over realistic or gothic ones, So people like Hue Teo and Patri Balanovsky pop to my mind (and my artstation feed, seriously look them up).

How do you approach your projects; what is your general art process?

It really depends on the type of project I'm doing, though, my [Adventure Time] comics were all pretty similar in their conception: I write down all of my ideas in my notes so I won't forget them. Then I either roughly sketch out the entire comic as fast as I can, or I write a script (if the concept is specifically very dialog heavy) and then sketch it roughly. Then I do the lineart and color, nothing too complicated. The one thing I think is worth noting in my long comic process is that I draw all of my panels on the same document- that way it's easier for me to make sure the characters stay on model and that my panel layout remains fresh. So basically, the way you read the comics on tumblr, as a long scroll, is the format I work on.

How did you come to find Adventure Time? What made you join the fandom?

Adventure Time is one of those shows you just know about, so I don't remember how I first found out about the show. However, I do remember when I started shipping Bubbline—after the episode “Broke His Crown” aired. I somehow ended up in their Tumblr tag and was blown away by the (by 2016's standards) blatant representation. Despite my obsession with them at the time, I never actually watched any episode that didn't feature the girls' relationship. I only started fully watching the show recently. But I did consume a lot of fan content, which I think helped me shape my own headcanons and such. After my initial interest in 2016 I put Bubbline back on the back burner and kept on my [Steven Universe] ramage, until last year's “Obsidian,” which brought me back fully on board the Bubbline decks around 2 weeks before it aired, so I was in maximum hype mode when I watched the special. It did not disappoint [and it] really reminded me of why I loved these characters and their relationship to begin with. I started drawing my own art for the ship shortly after, when I felt like the hype around the special died down and there wasn't much to keep me sustained anymore. I make what I want to see ;)

As for joining the fandom, I don't know if I can be considered a member, seeing how inactive I am most of the time and my very limited list of [Adventure Time] mutuals. I am extremely flattered that my stuff caught ATimers attention in a positive way.

You've done some amazing Bubblegum and Marceline stuff. What draws you to their dynamic?

I'm gay.

OK, seriously now. I have a soft spot for extremely feminine, dainty characters that are very reserved, so PB immediately marked herself as an obvious fav, and the road to shipping her with Marceline (who is such an obvious candidate and a multilayered, fascinating character herself) was a short one. I know calling PB dainty is far from a true statement, but that's what she appeared like on the surface and that's what caught my attention. Another thing is that I love relationships between immortal beings, I think it always adds another layer of complexity to any relationship, especially a romantic one. The whole "getting older without appearing like you've aged" and "watching everyone you love die around you while you stay the same" can surely make 2 beings bond, right? It always felt like PB and Marcy get each other in a way no one else can, they are very different on the surface but share fundamental internal similarities. Oh, and the fact that they're EXES? The romantic tension and the longing? The familiarity and banter they had in every scene they shared?This hit the jackpot on literally every relationship trope that I love. I'd much rather watch a "getting back together" than a "falling in love for the first time" story.

All of this and the fact that they [are] gay. It's really that simple sometimes.

In broad strokes, what is next for you as an artist and/or as a fan?

I have a few [Adventure Time] comics ideas\scripts on the back burner and one that is in the making. I think I'll dabble into some Nintendo fanart cause I've been playing a lot of Smash Bros and [Legend of Zelda: Breath of the Wild] lately.

I’m so excited to see what comes next! Either way, a huge thanks to loycos for chattin’ with me! If you’d like to check out more of her art, visit her Tumblr and her Twitter page!

#adventure time #atimers #adventuretime #bubbline #princess bubblegum #marceline #marceline the vampire queen #pb #marcy #loycos #fanart #fan art #interview #fandom

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dippedanddripped · 3 years

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Old Nollywood aesthetics and fashion may be considered trendy today, but the films were not always so well-regarded. In the 90s and early 2000s, when these movies were made and watched in parlours across Nigerian homes as they were shot, straight-to-video, they were considered as bad entertainment, or ‘low culture’. To watch and enjoy Nollywood films was to celebrate mediocrity. But today, nostalgic young Millennials and Gen Zers are overlooking the jarring audio, grainy pictures, and sometimes hammy acting, to appreciate not only the grooming and style of the actors, but the original and diverse stories that reflect unique Nigerian experiences.

It was for this reason that sisters Tochi and Ebele Anueyiagu started Nolly Babes, a nostalgic Instagram account dedicated to celebrating the cinematic period’s women. Started in December 2017, their first post was of Nollywood’s biggest star Genevieve Nnaji; a still taken from 2004 film Sharon Stone In Abuja, directed by Adim Williams. Nnaji plays the titular character, a sexually liberated young woman who uses her beauty and charm to ensnare unassuming men into doing her bidding.

The account is an ode to the female characters of old Nollywood who were often portrayed as warning examples. The storylines were steeped in moral principles rooted in the patriarchal culture and the dominant Christian religion of Southern Nigeria. A large number of the female characters were considered immoral because they kissed other women, challenged men, smoked and drank, or wore mini skirts. Today, Nolly Babes and similar accounts are reimagining these women, taking their scenes out of the moralistic context of the films, and turning them into iconic feminist personas.

The first time Nollywood content seeped into the mainstream internet consciousness can be traced back to 2017 when videos of Nollywood’s favourite comedic duo Chinedu Ikedieze and Osita Iheme, better known as Aki and Pawpaw, rose to popularity due mostly to the influence of a now-defunct Twitter account @nollywoodroll ran by Nicole, a woman based in Brazil.

Their memes became the go-to reaction videos for expressing a wide range of emotions: joy, disappointment, sadness, frustration. The appeal was in seeing children making mischief or in adult situations – drinking beer and smoking cigars, wooing bigger women, or in oversized suits shouting instructions at people twice their size. Although both Ikedieze and Iheme were in their 20s in the early 2000s when most of the films were made, they mostly played children because of their body stature. By 2019, the memes had achieved such virality that brands like Rihanna’s Fenty would use them for social media clout.

Theodora Imaan Beauvais is the curator of Yung Nollywood, another archive of clips and stills from old Nollywood paying homage to its controversial female characters, after screenshotting moments from Nollywood she found “appealing or inspirational”. Yung Nollywood is remarkably distinct from Nolly Babes for its subtitling of the films’ stills from Nollywood films, something she attributes to Tumblr. While the idea to give witty captions to the actors’ facial expressions came from watching Netflix. “I thought, ‘If someone could describe Nollywood reactions in short phrases it’d be an art form on its own,’ and I became that someone.’”

In December 2019, Tochi and Ebele hosted a Nollywood-themed party in Lagos. Nollywood actor and musician Nonso Bassey attended the party dressed in a two-piece jean set and bucket hat, a signature look of the bad boy/alpha male archetype, and a role reprised multiple times by older actors such as Hanks Anuku, Emeka Ike, and Jim Iyke. Since that party, Nonso has attended social functions and premieres in outfits that make a nod to the fashion choices of that era of Nollywood. He insists, though, that he isn’t cosplaying Nollywood characters of that era. “I’ve always been attracted to the idea of merging old world charm with a new school approach,” he said.

The party caused a cultural stir amongst Nigerians and Africans both at home and in the diaspora – every other week, there seems to be a Nollywood-themed party held either in Lagos or London. Take for instance friends and business partners Imani Okunubi and Aseosa Uwagboe, two Nigerian-British kids who grew up in the UK. Nollywood was one of the ways they could connect back to their roots. That experience informs their event brand, Lasgidi to London, targeted at Nigerians living in the UK. “We wanted to create events that were reminiscent of the Naija hall parties (Owambe) we attended as kids, as we don’t want to see that culture die,” Aseosa said. Their next owambe is a Nollywood-themed party and guests are expected to come dressed in their “best nolly Y2K aesthetic”.

Below, the Nolly Babes sisters talk about creating and hosting the first Nollywood-themed party and the cultural moment it has inspired.

How did that first event come about – please take me through it, from the planning to how it turned out?

Nolly Babes: From the inception of Nolly Babes, we knew we had to throw a party. Fashion is a huge part of what makes Nolly Babes different from other Nollywood-themed pages and we knew we were the only ones that could set Nolly Babes as the dress code and have people commit as they did. There are many iconic Nollywood scenes and scenarios. The daughter meeting her evil mother-in-law, the ominous visit to the Babalawo, the campus stroll – just the mere mention of these scenes evokes images that have been embedded in the minds of our fellow Nollywood enthusiasts. The party scene is probably the most iconic of them all. Whether it’s in a club, a mansion while mum and dad are out of town (but coming home early to crash the whole thing) or poolside, the Nolly Babes party scene has its staples: mad music, dancing, and sick outfits.

December in Lagos is notoriously hectic. On each day, there are day parties, beach hangouts, concerts, and we just knew we had to be a part of it. Our flyer was the first thing we made sure was done right, and that has been replicated (but never duplicated) many many times. We went through at least six drafts of that until we got the flyer to be a realistic replica of the home video covers from the golden era. The DJs Kemi Lijadu and vIVENDII Sounds understood the assignment and played music from the Nolly Babes era. We’re talking Tony Tetuila, Mo Hitz, Wande Coal, Plantation Boyz… We curated a special cocktail menu: Genny Colladas, Jim Iyke’s Hard Lemonade, MargaRita Dominic, and our Lagos Island Iced Tea, in tribute to Nollywood stars Genevieve Nnaji, Jim Iyke, and Rita Dominic respectively. We had a video projection on the famous red wall at Nok showing a mashup of emblematic scenes. We were partying while seeing images of a young Jim Iyke dressed just like many of the attendees were dressed. It was magical! We have an event we’re planning in New York for the summer – it’s going to be a madness.

Did you envisage it becoming the cultural movement it’s now become?

Nolly Babes: We really didn’t. We hosted the party because we knew people were taking inspiration from our page for styling jobs and music video treatments, and wanted to give everyone a chance to recreate some of their favourite looks. Now every week we see people planning Nollywood-themed parties and sending people to our page for references. It’s awesome. Toke Makinwa even recently attended a Nolly Babes-themed party and she was dressed as a character we have immortalised – Regina Askia in President’s Daughter. She killed it! Even though the character wasn’t referenced, it was clear as day and it was awesome to see that she pulled it off! Honestly, when we see people really pay attention to detail and execute the theme well it’s so, so dope.

How has TikTok helped grow Nollywood's influence? You posted a scene from Girls Cot, the famous “you stink with poverty” clip on TikTok and it went viral and birthed these recreations even by non-Africans.

Nolly Babes: We’re just happy to see that another aspect of Nollywood that we champion – the iconic scenes and one-liners – is also resonating across the world. We see Nolly Babes as an archival work and as much as we focus on beauty and looks on Instagram, it’s nice to be able to point people in the direction of the scenes that are forever embedded in our brains. These are scenes we recreated in jest ourselves before there was even a Nolly Babes to begin with, so to see it catching on TikTok is exciting and a new frontier for us to fully explore. I think what distinguishes Nolly Babes from other Nollywood pages and what contributes to our TikTok success is that we really watch Nollywood movies. We grew up watching these movies and continue to do so now so we can capture those moments in films that the casual consumer or poster of Nollywood content might not.

What are your thoughts on Nollywood’s influence on the Alté scene? Music videos of artists such as Lady Donli and Odunsi nod to the aesthetic and fashion styles of that era.

Nolly Babes: Nollywood, and specifically the aesthetic we have shone a spotlight on, is probably one of the biggest influences in terms of visuals in that scene right now. I have never seen so many Eucharia (Anunobi) eyebrows on TV and we love it! It’s awesome to see our images and scenes being used in treatments and storyboards. If we’re being candid, we think it would be great if we got the chance to step into our stylist/creative direction bag and help with the execution of the aesthetic.

“The bottom line is really that Nolly Babes has brought what was already an international cultural influence to the modern social media realm with a new lens” – Nolly Babes

How far do you see Nollywood's influence on pop culture, beyond Nigeria and Africa?

Nolly Babes: When we moved to New York we found our Dominican and South American friends had also grown up watching Nollywood films. The bottom line is really that Nolly Babes has brought what was already an international cultural influence to the modern social media realm with a new lens. Nollywood clips were online everywhere – but it was always in a comedic way. Aki and PawPaw are meme gods now, and that’s because their expressions transcend cultural boundaries. Black Twitter eats that stuff up.

Nolly Babes chooses to center the beauty, style, and iconic imagery, even the home decor with our #NollyDecor hashtag of the golden era of Nollywood. We share the makeup, accessories, fashion, iconic phrases, and scenes in a way that isn’t just comedic but inspirational and aesthetically groundbreaking. I see Nollywood being at the centre of this Y2K resurgence that is happening all over the world, from TV to runways and fashion collections. That era is coming back around and, this time, the Black experience is being revisited and centered in a way it wasn’t back in the late 90s and 2000s. (Black people) were always the originators of the trends and this time they’re tapping into the source and Nollywood, particularly the era we celebrate as Nolly Babes, is a great resource for that.

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