#I'm very excited about the imagery side of things being done though

[braveburned]

hi ! thesis update for anyone interested — as of today I have officially remade and printed every single piece that will be in my exhibition, and I'm about halfway done with my paper. I'm lowkey dying

[veliseraptor]

March Reading Recap

Juliet: The Life and Afterlives of Shakespeare's First Tragic Heroine by Sophie Duncan. I actually really liked this one! It was an interesting look at several different lenses that have been used over time to look at Juliet (specifically Juliet, not the play), including the relationship between fascism and Juliet in Verona, Italy and the development of West Side Story (didn't know Juliet was Jewish in an early version). I enjoy sort of niche/specific books focusing on a very particular subject, and this book scratched that itch well.

The Brilliant Abyss: Exploring the Majestic Hidden Life of the Deep Ocean, and the Looming Threat That Imperils It by Helen Scales. I read this book too soon after The Underworld by Susan Casey which, while not necessarily a better book, covered a lot of the same terrain. The trouble with a keen interest in a niche topic is, I suppose, that the books on it can start to get repetitive sometimes. It was still good, though, and this one focused a bit less on the history of human exploration than Casey did and a bit more on the ecosystems themselves, which I did welcome.

Blood of the Chosen and Emperor of Ruin by Django Wexler. The second and third books in the series that started with Ashes of the Sun - both continued the trend of "I don't know that I'd call these particularly good works of literature but they were very enjoyable and propulsive." The second book was stronger than the third - I ended up feeling like the conclusion of the trilogy was weaker and a little rushed, but I still enjoyed the experience as a whole and would offer at least a tentative, general recommendation of the series for those looking for a fantasy series that's not particularly innovative or serious but is an exciting ride.

The First Sister by Linden A. Lewis. This book reminded me a little bit of Such Desperate Glory but wasn't quite as well done, I don't think. The back compared it to Mass Effect but I don't really see that as a reasonable comparison. Possibly one of my favorite things about it was the cover design, which fucks. I still liked it, though, and I'm going to read the sequel.

The Great White Bard: How to Love Shakespeare While Talking About Race by Farah Karim-Cooper. Sometimes when I read things I feel like a snot because I go "this is interesting information but the writing feels a little amateurish" and that was my situation with this book. It was good analysis and interesting to read, though sometimes the "and this is how this is modern-ly relevant! q-anon mention" felt a little bit...ehhh, unnecessary, but the writing itself was...yeah. It felt amateurish. Which might just be a result of the book itself being targeted at a particular audience that's less academically-minded than I am, that's certainly possible, but it did affect my enjoyment of the book.

Last Days by Adam Nevill. Mostly this was good spooky fun, though it lost me with the "the ultimate bad guy is an overweight bisexual actor with AIDS" (it's a little more complicated than that, but not enough). Too bad, because conceptually and in terms of imagery it could've been very good. Between this and my last Nevill, I might have to give future books a pass. My search for horror that isn't playing on bigoted tropes apparently continues, since I'm on a bit of a streak there with this and Ring.

China: A History by John Keay. I'd call this one a solid overview despite the choice to use "bureaux" for the plural. However, I'm taking a lot of it with a grain of salt since as far as I can tell he didn't use many or possibly any Chinese secondary sources, and relied primarily for quotations/analysis on English secondary sources. I would've liked to see more of a balance. Still, as far as background information and a general broad history goes, it feels like it was worth reading for me to get a little more background/grounding in history I don't have a lot of familiarity with. (Also, holy shit did Ken Liu crib hard on Liu Bang and Xiang Yu for The Grace of Kings and now I know that.)

Remnants of Filth: vol. 3 by Rou Bao Bu Chi Rou. I continue to really enjoy this book and this volume might be my favorite yet - the flashbacks were satisfying to fill in some of the gaps in mysteries as yet unrevealed, and having Gu Mang fully "back" (more or less) is a fun development that is already having consequences changing the dynamic between him and Mo Xi in delightfully angsty ways. Of the cnovels I'm currently in the middle of this one is close to LHJC as far as my favorite.

Starter Villain by John Scalzi. This one is what I think people would call a "romp" which is all well and good and I probably should've known what I was getting into, but I think I am just not much of a "romp" reader. It was fun, I guess? But I don't know that I felt like it was good, and I'm probably not going to go around recommending it. My first Scalzi, and I don't know if that's typical of him, but I probably won't be in a hurry to pick up another one anytime soon.

Invisible Planets: Contemporary Chinese Science Fiction in Translation ed./trans. by Ken Liu. Short story collections are really hit and miss for me, but this was actually a collection that was pretty hit all the way through! Very interesting stories, a couple I'm still thinking about. I'm looking forward to reading my other collection of short stories in translation, which includes some fantasy - some of these actually felt somewhere between fantasy and science fiction in a very interesting way that I liked.

--

phew. I read a lot last month! Currently I'm reading Medea by Eilish Quin (we'll see how that goes); I have on my docket The Mountain in the Sea by Ray Nayler (recommended to me) and I think I might reread She Who Became the Sun so I can read He Who Drowned the World. I've been on more of a fiction than a nonfiction kick of late, but I am eyeing Islands of Abandonment by Cal Flyn and might make that part of my rotation. we shall see!

[ineffableigh]

Timeline of Suspicious Events Brain Dump - PART 2

Ran out of characters. See previous post here! [linky]

We resume during Muriel's initial visit to the bookstore. They're having a nice look at a cupperty.

Crowley arrives in a bluster with all his plants - we've only seen him angrily say No about the Bentley and yet he seems to be going along with it anyway. He asks the important question: why not take the train? Why go by car? It's an eight hour drive each way! Train or even plane is WAY FASTER!

Crowley's the one that does the 'humans are weird/a few days' line for some bloody reason. Crowley what are you doin' man lol pick a better lie!

It feels Important that we see so many one on one moments with Nina, but not Maggie. Like we're building Nina as a character, but not really Maggie, y'know?

The show also really wants us to see how uncomfortable Nina is with discussing her love life at all, but everyone in the story just kind of blows past it.

"Dance Macabre" in the Bentley eh? A tone poem about Death calling the dead from their graves to dance for him? Like, I dunno, Gabriel says later in his Tempest line? A piece that quotes Dies Irae?

I love the musical conflict going on in the background once Crowley takes control of the Bentley's Vibes back lol.

Interesting that we have an entire moment to see that Beez is unhappy with the status quo in Hell, and the lack of recognition for all the work they seem to constantly have to do down there. Especially since we hear later they're very 'short staffed'.

Crowley moving seemingly random books from upstairs to downstairs, cosplaying a bookseller (ostensibly). Seems very chill about chatting gravity with Jimbriel, and we get our first Direct Fly Callout. Might be the second, not sure re: 'flyswats' when the archangels visited.

Pub imagery: Jesus raising Lazarus on one side, and the 'butcher' Dalrymple on the other side. Hmmm two sides of Heaven anyone?

It has to involve Aziraphale somehow because the Production Designer had that painting of Jesus done with the tomb opening being exactly like the 'eastern gate' of Eden in s01. Seems like a big effort to go to if not to draw parallels!

I find it interesting that Aziraphale a) seems super excited to hear about the 'Masons' b) there's a lodge next door to the pub, but c) we don't investigate that OR the person Gabriel was with. Y'know, the little shaggy haired demon with a bowler hat covered in flies? Normally would be quite conspicuous, yes? We know that Azi knows what Beez looks like from the end of S01.

Post-minisode we cut DIRECTLY to Aziraphale at the graveyard. What did he do between the pub and then? Did he walk there, drive there? Another huge gap to account for that's just swept under the rug.

Convenient that No Regerts and Friend are there, both being comically intense tough guys openly talking about Grindr lol. Just hanging out in the fog with no phone minutes left like ya do. Very convenient they were there, though I'm not sure what the advantage of that phone call even was. It's so strange a scene across the board that it feels like something is missing.

Back in town, Maggie is chasing Nina to talk about getting stuck in the cafe. I don't know what it is about their talks but to me they feel strange, or at least Maggie's side does. Might just be a by-product of us not seeing Nina 'acting like it's Maggie's fault' but it all feels very out of the blue, y'know? Always when Nina's busy working and can't really escape.

"I'm not your type." "You have no idea." Maggie SHE HAS A PARTNER AND SHE JUST SAID THE PARTNER SUSPECTS CHEATING, NOW IS NOT THE TIME LOL. See what I mean about Weird Vibes though?

Sudden Tempest Prediction from Gabriel. Very weird that he has these moments, either by forcing himself or these triggers. Do you have to be Empty to channel God?

Multitude of Shax Visions - this sequence seems odd to me. We've seen Shax impersonate a human once, yes, but this back to back thing seems unusually competent for her. I do wonder if we're getting a Crowley's Very Stressed Perspective thing going on here. Poor lad sure is stressed.

I was wondering how Shax figured out where Aziraphale was, but I bet she probably just tried to teleport to the Bentley like most demons seem to when Crowley was in it, but probably got punted outside by the Invitation Only magic. Or something.

The interaction with Shax here is really weird, though. It seems purely designed to freak Aziraphale out rather than actually get information. She says now she knows Gabriel is in the bookshop, but nothing about the discussion actually pointed to it any more than she would have known beforehand.

Shax then goes on to tell Beez that Gabriel is in the bookshop. Why she's so confident, I still don't really know, like I said above. All she knows is both the Husbands are being obfuscating dorks, but maybe that's enough.

Also like, Beez, you maybe should have just. Gone to the bookshop? Instead of attacking it? When you know Hell is short staffed? This is a Weird Plot Point too, if Beez just wants Gabriel. Why go straight to war?

As they're bringing Crowley's plants back to the car I hear glass shattering??? What's up with that??

Azi you dingle why are you hiding the Shax visit from Crowley. They really DON'T talk and for no good reason.

Next Instalment: [Linky]

[corvuserpens]

So yeah, yesterday I decided to FINALLY watched The Meg bc everyone kept saying it was a silly fun shark movie... AND THEY WERE RIGHT. It was AWESOME.

I went in expecting practically nothing, and it blew me away. The story premise is ridiculous and it totally feels like the director, actors and crew 100% knew that and embraced it! The movie never takes itself too seriously, it practically tells you to just kick back and enjoy it for what it is, which is exactly what makes it so much fun. It's an exciting comedy horror about a giant prehistoric shark in present day Earth, the CGI is dubious but the cinematography makes up for it with some great, well composed shots. For example, when Suyin is in the trench and is being attacked by a giant squid? That in itself is pretty cool imagery, but then you see the Megalodon swimming over her sub with the squid in its mouth in the gloom, illuminated from below?? WOW????

Then the characters are like, surprisingly deep? They have interesting backstories that inform us on who they are and while Jonas is the only one who gets some screen time for his Big Trauma, we later learn that Lori might have blown up a whaler ship for an environment organization and that's how she learned to pilot? And that Suyin had a tough relationship with her dad but they love each other so much that with his dying breath he tells her how proud he is, that she already surpassed him as a scientist and he hopes Meying will grow up to be just like her? And we get all of that with some very organic, short dialog or like 3-4 minute scenes, which is rare these days. Legit good writing where it is most needed, all the more sober scenes are well-acted and so immersive, the characters are so likable I ended up rooting for all of them to survive (except that billionaire whose name I didn't bother to learn, everyone else I remember except him, FUCK that guy). Even the side characters, though flat, were interesting because the actors gave them so much personality!

And, WHAT DO YOU MEAN THERE'S A WHOLESOME CISHET SHIP WITH JASON STATHAM WITH VERY LITTLE SEXUAL TENSION BUT A LOT OF ROMANTIC TENSION?? WHAT IS THIS WITCHCRAFT??? Seriously, I was shipping Jonas and Suyin so hard, their interactions were adorable. How he goes from being the typical Tough Manly Man Who Is Super Competent And Punches All The Bad Guys While Wearing The Same Tough Guy Face All Movie to genuinely caring for the whole Mana One crew and respecting Suyin as an accomplished female scientist in her own right who knows what she's doing and is also brave and headstrong herself... Much 'aww'ing' was done.

Not to make this too long a rant, I love talking about movies I enjoyed, sorry, but a few other small things I liked about it: that Lori and Jonas remained good friends who care and support each other, and want the other's happiness even being divorced, we need more of that! And Dr. Heller apologizing to Jonas and meaning it for saying he was crazy and basically ruining his life (plus Jonas forgiving him in the end), definitely wanna see more of that! Jonas' friendship with Meying, THAT WAS SO CUTE, I COULDN'T GET ENOUGH OF THEM!! The gags were all genuinely funny, I was laughing through most of the movie, and the jump scares got me more than a couple of times (though that might be a fault on my part, I'm a big wussy and I am not afraid to admit it). The action is so. DUMB. But it's the kind that it's so dumb it's good, y'know?

Final note, I gotta say, let Jason actually act more because he's really good and directors keep hiring him to play a stoic emotionless hero when he can do so much more? He has impeccable comedic timing, his line delivery no matter how bonkers, always lands, he's REALLY CHARMING and y'all are wasting his potential imo. Given, I haven't really watched many of his movies after the Transporter franchise, but for example, I loved him in The Italian Job and a couple of weeks ago I started watching Homefront and I was enjoying it because he gets to play a widower with a young daughter in a new town, and now I definitely need to finish it bc I'm a sucker for father/daughter dynamics.

Anyway, yeah, if you like sharks, B-movies or just something fun to watch that will make you laugh, go watch The Meg. It's good enough to convince me to go watch the sequel next August. Can't wait!

[asotin]

it's past two am and I was going to go to sleep but my brain screamed at me NEJI and refused to elaborate, so I'm going to do the only reasonable thing and ask my fav blog: do you have any hot takes about him?

I'm so sorry this took so long 😭 I have no excuses. My takes probably aren't very hot, but here we go:

We will not be discussing the disservice of his death

I dig his Shippuden look. The white and gray color scheme, the traditional clothing as inspiration, the gray... over skirt? Open kilt? Idk what it is but it gives me Shippuden Sakura vibes, and I enjoy it. I would have liked his hair better if it had been done differently, though. Maybe totally loose or pulled into a high ponytail?

He deserved to be angry with his entire family, including Hinata, and Konoha at large. I'm including Hinata because even though it wasn't directly her fault and she was also abused, it was a different kind and didn't prevent her from becoming a focus for Neji's trauma. Trauma is messy like that

Where's the structural change in the clan? Where's the acknowledgement that because Neji is clearly more proficient in their fighting style than Hinata, maybe it's reckless to use him as a shield for her? Even strong traditions get questioned

Neji and Hanabi should have scenes together. In a way, they've had opposite and identical experiences with Hinata. They're both stronger than she is, but where Hanabi was allowed to surpass Hinata in standing, Neji wasn't. If Hinata had been stronger, Hanabi wouldn't have the guilt of being chosen over her and Neji wouldn't have the burden of knowing he could be called on to die for someone weak. Their relationships are so complicated that I want to shake someone because we never deal with any of it!

He was a phenomenal comedic partner for Lee. He's so rigid and proper that Lee's enthusiastic nonsense is even more stark. It's kind of like Gai and Kakashi, but we know that Kakashi actually enjoys the challenges. I don't think Neji secretly enjoys Lee's screaming*. Unfortunately, his refusal to be carried on Lee's back made me blurt laugh

I love that good, good NejiTen content. I wish Tenten got to do things in general, but I also think she and Neji would be a great team in a fight. I would like to see her throw things to him while he's spinning and Neji throwing them back at enemies. Team Gai ultimate move: Tenten heaves Lee and a barrage of weapons at Neji, Neji redirects them all, Lee screams in excitement the whole time. That would be phenomenal

The bird in a cage imagery is really, really good. Arguably the best in the whole series. And actually, I am going to talk about his death because we got the imagery of the cage opening so the bird could fly free and I love digging into imagery

The bird in a cage metaphor doesn't work for Neji in Shippuden. He'd already gotten free. His cage opened after he found out about Hizashi and began to work with Hinata. His cage was the Hyūga system, but because of that system, he was forced into another cage. He was emotionally distant. He wasn't making friends because he didn't want them because why would he? But that cage opened, too. He made connections with other people. He was his own person, living a life he was choosing. His death scene didn't open any cages because they were already open. His death for the sake of Hinata wasn't consistent with his character arc. It was a rehashing of Hiashi and Hizashi, but unlike Hizashi, who hadn't found any freedom before his death, Neji's death not only shut his cage but dragged him back into it first. He died in Hinata's place because she couldn't protect herself. That torpedoed both his progress and Hinata's

Where is the battle where Hizashi beats the shit out of Hiashi? If I had left my kid in the care of a sibling who did what Hiashi did, I would destroy that sibling. Just erase them from existence

* I'm actually torn about this because I don't think he's like Kakashi and wants to take part in the nonsense, but I do think that Lee is special to him. We don't see them together enough, but it would be consistent with his growth as a person if he accepted that he was shitty about Lee's dream because he wanted to be able to reach like that. He couldn't be optimistic. But he wanted to be. He wanted Lee to succeed and break destiny

Side note: NejiLee? Underrated

[butterbuni]

♥ Chapter 5 ~ Recommendation Entrance Exam P1 ♥

Previous Chapter

"You will have 30 minutes to prepare for your written exam, you may converse and study with one another but there will be no conversations during the test. You may start." Cementoss said leaving the stage. I couldn't stop smiling. I am actually here about to take the exam.

I couldn't help smiling like an idiot. I looked around the auditorium, there were so many more people than I expected. At least a 50 by the looks of it.

God this is nerve-racking. I reached into my backpack pulling out the study guide Star made for me. I have to remember to thank him till the end of time. I wonder how he is doing in his exam. Probably acing it like a pro. I hung my head down in defeat. Why is school so hard? I can ace almost anything else but for things like math or chemistry, my mind just stops working.

"Hello" I looked up towards the voice. It was a rather tall girl with beautiful black hair tied up into a ponytail. I gave her a small smile and said "Hello I'm L/N Y/N but please call me Y/N I'm not a fan of formalities" "I am Yaoyorozu Momo, I noticed you were looking quite upset. May I ask why?" She sounded genuinely concerned, she seems so nice. "I just don't feel prepared for this test I feel like I'm going to fail. I am more of a hands-on person rather than a thinker and it just ugghhh" I placed my head on my unopened study guide.

"Maybe I can help you study we still have 25 minutes before the test starts and I could use a study buddy for the time being." I perked my head up to her smiling face. Wow, she's pretty. My brain fart disappeared as I realized what she said. My head straightened a huge smile was plastered on my face "Really you would help me!" "shhhhhhhhhhhh!" A guy behind me who looked like a skeleton with hair. "Sorry I will be quieter" God this is so awkward where is Star when you need him.

"I would love for you to help me it would mean a lot. thank you." She sat down next to me and pulled out her own study guide it was much thicker than mine. She really came prepared. I decided to just scrap my study guide and we went over stuff in hers.

~Shoto's POV~

"Really you would help me!" I looked up from my book to see who was yelling at this time. It's that girl from earlier. She's so unprofessional I thought she would be with the other kids in the regular entrance exam. She obviously doesn't do well in school so why is she even here? I need to focus on this test. I looked back down at my guide. If I want to become a hero I need to pass.

~Back to Y/N~

She makes the work sound so easy way better than Star. If he meets her, I'm pretty sure he will try and challenge her to an intelligence match. I am so glad I met her before the test. Maybe we both get in and see each other in school.

There was a ring indicating that the study session was over. Cementoss came back to the stage as the whole auditorium got quiet. "Everyone please move so there are three seats separating you from other testers." "Good luck Y/N you worked hard so you will be able to pass," Momo said as she moved three seats away. I waved her goodbye and told her good luck as well.

Once everyone was situated, cement blocks rose in front of our tables with the test and a calculator. Cementoss continued to talk. "Once you hear the bell you will begin. You will have 2 hours to complete your exam. Once you are finished with your exam you will place it back on the cement and you may go to the break room. There you will receive a number and you may do any necessary preparations for your practical exam. Remember there will be absolutely no cheating. If you are caught cheating, you will be escorted out of school and you will never be able to retake the exam and you can say goodbye to ever being admitted to UA academy. Good luck." As he left the stage there was another bell indicating the test had begun. I picked up my pencil and opened the packet.

The net effect of photosynthesis, chemically, is reduction, leading to the formation of simple carbohydrates and accompanied by a release of oxygen. True or False.

Oh boy.

__________________

Finally, I'm done with the test. Momo already left. I wonder how she did. She most likely passed she's very smart. I picked up my bag and left the auditorium. There was a sign outside pointing towards the break room. I should probably change first. I did a quick turn and headed for the nearest bathroom. "Oof". Oh jeez. I looked up to face the back of a guy. He had crimson red and white hair split evenly down the center. He was on the taller side but other than that nothing special till he turned around and faced me. My mouth gaped open. He had beautiful different colored eyes and a huge scar over one of them, which was very odd.

"It's rude to stare." He scoffed down at me. I will just ignore that scoff since it was my fault. "Oh sorry, it was an acci..de..nt. You are Endeavor's son! I recognize that blue eye anywhere. My brother is practically obsessed with your family. Though that scar of yours isn't on pictures I've seen," I said in an attempt to break the ice.

He looked at me with absolute hatred in his eyes. Dang, I didn't know bumping into someone will automatically make me hated. Maybe I shouldn't have mentioned his scar. "Excuse me I need to be going." I moved out of the way allowing him to pass. As he left, I shouted, "Sorry for bumping into you, it was purely an accident. There is no need to look at me like that!" and ran into the bathroom to change. Such a quiet guy very different from the stories Kean says about Endeavor. I opened my backpack and pulled out my workout clothes. I quickly put them on. It was just some high waisted leggings and a white crop top. Perfect for optimum power use. I slipped on my shoes and grabbed my backpack. Hopefully, I'm not too late I still need some food in my system.

I got to the room where everyone else was and it was pretty full already. I looked around trying to find Momo so at least I will have somebody to talk to. "Ehehm." I looked around for the voice, but I didn't see anyone talking to me. "Down here, dearie." I looked down to see a small elderly woman. My smile grew so wide. "Recovery Girl! Oh, it's so nice to meet you. My mom talks about you all the time. I knew you were going to be at UA as a teacher, but I didn't think I would meet you today at the exam. Oh, this is so exciting. Can I have your autograph?" I gushed out in excitement. "One thing at a time dear. Here is your number it should always be visible at all times till you leave." "Yes ma'am," I said taking the number and putting it on my shirt.

"You must be M/N's daughter. You share the same energetic curious aura that she does. Plus, those ears are hard to forget." She chuckled light-heartedly. I sheepishly laughed. Oh, I wish she won't talk about my ears. "If it's an autograph you want here." She motioned me to come down to her level. I stooped down as she wrote her name on my number paper. "Thank you so much!" "Now now dearie you have a practical exam to get ready for and I have numbers to pass out. Good luck." I waved goodbye.

I walked over to the food table. It was decked out with so much food. My mouth watered as I looked at it all. I could eat everything here in five seconds if I wanted to. "Looks good doesn't it." I heard Momo behind me. "Oh yeah it looks good, even better than good, it looks scrump-dilly-isous." She giggled at my choice of words.

We picked out some food and went to sit down and eat while we wait for the others to finish testing. "So, what's your quirk Momo," I said in between bites. "My quirk is creation. I have the ability to create any non-living material/object from my exposed skin by transforming the molecular structure of my fat cells." "Your quirk is just like my best friend's; he is in the regular entrance exam. Although he doesn't use fat cells but rather imagery using his neocortex. Though he can only use the item for 10 minutes before it disappears. Do your items disappear too?" "No, they are permanent after I create them. So, what's your quirk." "From what I've figured out I can control the elements. Air, fire, earth, and water; the usual but I can lose energy using it a lot. Though there is sub stuff I'm trying to figure out. That is why I am here at UA. Hopefully, they can help me 'reach my full potential' as my brother says." I said with quotation marks.

"Wow, your quirk is so powerful! No wonder you're in recommendations," she said with excitement. I sheepishly laughed, "It's actually not that powerful really. When I first started, I could barely lift a pebble without passing out. My brother says that any quirk can be powerful it all depends on the person and how they use it. Your quirk is awesome you can create anything you want and it's forever. If you wanted you could make so many clothes and video games!" I gushed. "T-That's against the rules! If I make anything I want with my quirk then the circulation of money will be disrupted. As a citizen of this nation, I must increase the flow of money in the economy." she said in an attempt to defend her obvious spending habits.

~Shoto's POV~

'Sorry for bumping into you, it was purely an accident. There is no need to look at me like that!' How did I look at her? I looked up to see the odd girl conversing with another student. She's so odd and weird. How can she be so loud and obnoxious with no regard for other peoples' study time so early in the morning? Not to mention she's dumb and could have used the study time. How in the world did she make it into recommendations. I'll find out as soon as I pass this stupid test. I need to prepare.

"Students we will be taking a bus to the testing site form two lines and board in an orderly fashion!" some random guy yelled into the room.

It's time.

~Y/N POV~

Finally, the fun part is about to begin. "C'mon Momo we got this. Let's go."

[livlepretre]

tysm for all ur FE updates!!! i'm really excited for elijah's introduction in this dynamic. i feel like he's just as acquainted with elena's morally complex nature as klaus's since, after all, he was the first one she ever lured in and daggered (call-back to that scene was GREAT btw). i'm just curious how you view elena/elijah's dynamic vs. klaus/elena's, even outside the scope of the fic, esp since they've had more canon interactios

This is an ask after my own heart, nonny! 

This is such an interesting question-- it’s true that Elijah and Elena have a lot more canon interactions to work with, although the Klaus and Elena interactions we DO have in canon are so ripe and explosive that it lends itself to a lot of speculation. 

So, here are my thoughts: 

Elena/Elijah: Elena and Elijah both operate under the false assumption that they’re both honorable people. In fact, all of the trust they build together in season 2 is based on this idea, with both of them going to great lengths to negotiate and prove themselves to the other. They both think they’re being extremely honest with the other-- the deal they make in 2x11 utterly fascinates me, because Elijah honestly asks Elena to die as her part of the deal, and she agrees??? It doesn’t sound like he tried to hide that from her at all. Now, Elena DOES dagger him, but she also proves herself to him later and is able to account for her actions. All of that combined with the insane levels of attraction between them (WHEN HE SMELLS HER AND THEN GIVES HER THAT LITTLE WAVE IN 2x08????) make for really captivating television. There’s also a lot of interesting framing going on with the camera angles-- if you look back at it, notice how often Elena is shown in mirror reflections during her early scenes with Elijah-- all the time. What a great call back to how he sees her not just as herself, but as her role as the doppelganger. I do think he BEGINS to see her as herself as he gets to know her, especially by 2x19, but that takes time. 

Well. The crux of it all is that Elena goes through with her side of the deal-- the deal on which their entire relationship is based-- going to her death, losing her aunt whom Elijah fails to protect-- even though doing so was HIS part of the bargain-- and then Elijah is the one who breaks his word when he decides not to kill Klaus. This is the first sign we have that actually Elijah isn’t honorable at all; he thinks that he is, but really, he’s as selfish as his siblings. I don’t really think Elena ever forgives him for this. We see in season 3 that she still really is attracted to Elijah, and that she can’t quite help but be drawn in by him, but she never allows herself to really put herself in his hands again. She might feel bad about conspiring to kill him with the rest of his family in 3x14 and 3x15... but she also doesn’t hesitate. And she doesn’t exactly confess what she’s done, either. She just gets caught. I also don’t think that Elijah’s letter to her did anything to smooth over the wreck they’d made of their relationship/unspoken attraction to each other. The way Elena recites it back to him in season 4 says it all about how much she dwelled on his words, but it also implies that she’s still hurt and angry about it all all of that time later. I think she had this really powerful, idealized image of Elijah, and her disillusionment with him is profound. 

Meanwhile, Elena is also on a path throughout seasons 2 & 3 of discovering that she’s not who she thought she’d grow up to be. She is definitely more honorable than Elijah when they meet, and she means to keep her word. But Elena’s story is that she’s an orphan with no parental/mentor guidance influencing her in a positive and moral way; instead, she has a 26 year old aunt who means well but is totally in the dark about what’s really going on and pretty much in over her head, and maybe Alaric, who shouldn’t count as a good influence because, well, look at his life, look at his choices. And she has the Salvatores. The greatest influences upon her. Damon has the greatest part in tipping her away from the straight and narrow path, to getting her sense of right and wrong to slowly unravel until she gets to a place such as 2x05, when she watches Damon eat the deputies and she doesn’t bat an eyelash (how far she’s come from 1x07 when she slapped Damon and called him out!). I MORE than suspect that the infamous Elijah-daggering at the lake house was a Damon/Elena collaboration. But even Stefan, who the show frames as so stalwart and honorable, is still a terrifying vampire with ultimately little concern for human life. He still hurts people off and on throughout seasons 1 & 2, or doesn’t particularly have a problem with it when Damon does. I mean, do you see Stefan crying over what Damon did to Caroline in season 1? It’s inconceivable from a human view point. But that’s the point. They’re not human, and they’re the greatest influences in Elena’s life. No small part of Bonnie’s horror with the Salvatores is because she watches Elena slowly turn down this dark path with those two leading Elena by the hand-- human Elena, who should never cross through the veil into the shadow. 

She’s still in the process of straying from that path-- from her honorable self-- when Elijah meets her. By the time they encounter each other in season 3, she’s already left all of that behind. She stabs people in the back when they trust her. She negotiates and gives her word only to double cross as soon as the moment is right, and she doesn’t seem to lose very much sleep over it. Elijah’s issue is that he cannot see that in Elena-- he wants to see her as who she was when he met her-- who Katerina and probably who Tatia was-- as a miracle that he desires but doesn’t quite dare to touch-- but he is incapable of seeing that his betrayal of her at the sacrifice was probably the last straw that killed whatever innocence was left in Elena. 

I think the attraction and the yearning is always going to be there between them, but it’s so embittered, especially from Elena’s point of view, that it’s hard to say whether they would be able to work past that unless Elijah suddenly learned some actual introspection skills. 

Elena/Klaus: I’ve had to think a while about this dynamic to answer the question of how this relationship is as directly compared to Elena/Elijah. Obviously they both have the history and repetition element, of the dead lover whose face keeps reiterating through time-- what a dreadful and terrifying idea, honestly. Except where Elijah is almost afraid to even touch Elena (he SO desires her, but never ever acts on it), Klaus touches Elena all. the. time. There’s a real possessiveness to his relationship with her-- notice how he holds her as he devours her; how during the Reckoning he’s always physically close to her, leaning into her space, touching her-- whereas Elijah really physically backs off from Elena when he confirms her identity, Klaus comes closer. 

This is interesting because I’ve realized in thinking about this relationship, and what Klaus and Elena potentially have in common, that what they really share is their isolation-- their loneliness. Klaus explicitly states that this is why he desires Elena-- to make hybrids, so he won’t be alone anymore (Rebekah mocks him for it, but there it is). Elena, meanwhile, is at her most alone in season 3-- everyone walks away from her there, for reasons she has no control over. This is never really used as a point to bring them together as characters, but I find it really interesting as a possibility for connection. 

Another thing that really interests me is that Elena often tries to negotiate with Klaus the way she would with Elijah-- and mostly, it fails spectacularly. Klaus recognizes in Elena that she is a schemer and a liar-- because he is too. What’s fascinating though is that, just like Elijah, he tends to treat her as an equal in these conversations-- even if he doesn’t want to play. He doesn’t tend to treat with the other characters in this way, and that gives Elena an intriguingly special status there. 

In canon we really don’t have a ton to work with to talk about the Klaus/Elena dynamic-- it’s all potential. The idea of fate being so strong and impossible to avoid-- that in that sense, they’re almost warped soul mates?; the powerful fire imagery surrounding them (the only time Elena’s elemental coding switches from water to fire is with Klaus); the chemistry and attraction that bubbled over in all of their scenes, especially in the early days; the fact that she is just so constantly challenging him and wrecking him at every turn? Klaus’s big problem is that no one is his equal, and yet... here is Elena. Human Elena, whose reasoning is as warped as Klaus’s by season 3, who somehow keeps scrambling up to play against Original vampires and witches and all sorts of creatures who should be able to crush her and yet, she keeps besting them. That’s some potent stuff to work with. I tend to think that at the end of the day, Klaus actually understands Elena much better than Elijah did, because his view of her isn’t really muddied by idealism and instead really takes into account her more tarnished nature. My only regret is that the showrunners obviously feared ever really exploring Klaus x Elena x Elijah (EVEN THOUGH THEY COMPLETELY SET IT UP) because they felt that Stefan x Elena x Damon was already as much as the show could handle (it wasn’t-- we should have done both, obviously). 

[onceuponamirror]

I'm gonna ask another question that's not actually on the ask list - feel free to ignore if you want. What is your take on Jughead's potential new Serpent lifestyle, and how do you feel about how gang culture seems to be romanticized by some in the fandom?

ooo yes! 

(this answer spun out of control, i’m sorry)

(it’s interesting though, because this question is essentially exactly what i set out to explore in my earlier fic the winged beast)

it’s hard to really analyze what i haven’t seen yet, in terms of jughead’s potential serpent involvement—i’ve seen some filming/general spoilers, but ultimately without context it’s just spec—but overall i’m really excited about this upcoming narrative, because i think it’s a ripe opportunity to explore the cycle of classism, one that i feel confident is deliberate, given cole’s reddit AMAs. 

but speaking best i can to jughead’s upcoming entanglements, i think it comes from a lack of options. he feels pressed in on, with identities pushed onto him from all directions—plenty of people telling him who he is.

which is kind of the core of his character, especially in season one; a loner, not just because he can be a socially tactless person, but because he’s hiding from the identities that other people/the town will apply to him.

as in, he clings to being an outsider not only because he doesn’t fit in with the privileged north side, but because the south side wants to push him into a box as well. being a “weirdo” and diving head first into his true crime novel and isolating himself was the only protection against two polar worlds he doesn’t relate to. 

so it’ll be interesting in s2 to see him really face that head on—as in, i think there are going to be a lot of people telling him (and betty) who he is, and he’s going to have to come up with an answer to that. 

and often when people tell you who you are for long enough, or coerce the situation long enough, you start to wonder if they’re right. 

i suspect that’s what jughead’s going to have to grapple with—if his identity is his own choice, or if it’s purely an expectation of him. 

something projected onto him. 

and as i talked a bit about in my 2.01 meta [x], it’s really interesting that jughead strictly viewed his father’s lifestyle in romantic terms as well? i’ll just quote myself because it’s easiest: 

he’s still just a young boy craving a hero, and his father falling on his sword at the end of the first season earned him a lot of respect in his son’s eyes—his father’s biker iconography suddenly became a symbol of the under trod, proletariat revolutionary a jaded kid like jughead would be desperate for.

and the americana open road biker imagery has been heavily rose-colored over the years, particularly in pop culture, and i think that’s what jughead bought into—the idea of rebels, not the gang behind it.

and here he realizes that it’s not just symbolism. it’s not a game.

certainly i think people love the serpents, or at least side with them, because they love jughead and FP. which i get, because i’m one of those people. and at this stage, the serpents are just represented through FP, a character we’ve been made to empathize with even though he’s done incredibly destructive things and has a torturous relationship with his son. 

but for all riverdale sometimes faults with, the characters and their stories are so compellingly told from their perspective. we saw them (FP, jug) profiled and scapegoated, etc. we relate to them, we care about them. we’re on their side. 

and so beyond just feeling for FP in particular, the serpents as a “badass” entity and the excitement about them is is kind of where i think the general fandom’s rosy interpretation of the serpents comes from, as they are infused with romantic symbols associated with independence, freedom, the underdog, working class. 

and that’s the thing about certain types of americana/biker imagery. the fandom didn’t invent that, yanno? not the show either. 

and it makes sense, because when the visuals hark back to that greaser-springsteen hybrid atmosphere, oft they’re represented as the rebels, loners. certainly not always—but so in the case of riverdale, whose take on classism is aesthetic first and foremost.

and so it’s the soft weight of leather as an armor, the thick, lingering smell of grease and oil; the auxiliary senses associated with a “golden era” of american determinations. 

however, the imagery is only romantic when this kind of freedom-driven, americana iconography is almost strictly white. said “golden era” was certainly not golden for most people. 

there’s a huge difference of cultural association between biker gangs and gangs, even though they’re often similar stories being told, at their core. cyclically kept in poverty due to systematic oppressions of capitalism, gangs are often almost socialist in their very nature. 

leadership often works in almost marxist ways, the carving out of agency, looking out for the youth in the community and helping them with meeting the basic needs that the government ignores—but this is also the cycle of it, in that because they are so self-protecting because of societal oppressions, it also is part of the induction and recruitment. 

and doesn’t necessarily negate the rough parts either. as i mentioned above, like with jughead, a lot of this is a projected identity of community purely for self-protection, both against capitalist society (anti-social programs that keep poverty levels down) and against one another. 

my point, though: it’s also kind of only viewed as a romantic quest against The Man when it’s white poverty, right? 

this isn’t passing judgment the riverdale fandom, or on telling jughead’s story, esp because i’m excited as all hell about it—just commentary about larger, looser stories about americana “biker” gang life and the problematic associations with romanticizing certain aesthetics of it. 

which isn’t to say that i don’t personally enjoy said aesthetics either—but understanding the contextual origins plays a large role in navigating that. not accusing anyone of anything; especially because i’ve seen cole himself speak to this.

(as i said, this psychology of the cycles was something in particular i wanted to explore within my fic the winged beast, as well, and i get a lot more into that there)

although i’m hesitant to speak too much further to this outside of the vacuum of riverdale/it’s characters, because this is all from things i’ve read, not experienced, and don’t want to seem as though i’m speaking for an identity that isn’t mine. but that’s my rough take on it. 

ANYWAY, this analysis got out of my hands, wow someone make me relax 

but it was v fun, so thanks for the question!!!!

[nevertobeships]

Do you have any writing advice for someone who really struggles with writing body language? I have a hard time reading it in the real world and I'm lost on how to write it in my fics. I think my dialogue is fine it just seems like everything else is lacking. The transition from rp writing to fanfiction is really tough, and I can't seem to adapt to the now popular fanfiction trends of the way things are written. I'd be very grateful for any advice.

Anon, do not worry! Many people, including myself, strugglewith this. I’m going to make a couple of assumptions to get us started (if theyare incorrect just shoot me another ask and I can go in a different direction).I assume that if you are coming to me then you have read some of my writing andtherefore I also assume that you enjoy supercorp. With those two assumptions inmind I’m going to use that arena to give my advice. But please keep in mindthat this is only MY opinion. I’ve been writing pretty much my whole life andI’ve learned that there really is no right or wrong way to go about writing.Sure, there are preferred styles, grammatical rules, trends that may bepopular, etc…but essentially you have to find YOUR flow and style. Writing andwhat is considered the right way to write so subjective.

And just as a quick note I have never done rp writing sokeep that in mind.

Here is my advice (and I explain each point below):

1. Keep trying at the real life body language and understandthe pros and cons of having that information.

2. Use the resources you have (e.g., the show and gifs).

3. Find actors/actresses to use as muses and inspiration whoare really talented and who also put everything into their characters.

4. Read! 

Reading body language in the real world is hard. When youare interacting with another person there is so much else going on. Not onlyare you most likely participating in that interaction but you are trying toprocess what the other person is saying and doing on top of consideringenvironmental/situational variables, analyzing your own intentions while alsotrying to gauge the other person’s intentions – its crazy! This is why so fewpeople are good at this. Yet body language is crucial in many cases. Hell, in apersonal example of mine just recently – I was saying everything I could tosomeone, being EXPLICIT with my diction and my intentions and they just didn’tget it (or chose to ignore it for what it was :/) and…*sigh* well it’s a messlet me tell you. And I wonder if the interactions between us had happened inperson where there was body language (i.e., extra data) to process then perhapsthings wouldn’t have become so convoluted? There has been a lot of research thatshows we humans are not really good at conveying what we mean in simple text.If someone sends you a text that IS IN ALL CAPS you know something is going onout of the ordinary. They are excited, angry, etc… and are trying to getcertain information across in that way. That helps to a point. And its funnythat the rise of emojis was supposed to help us communicate better, beyond capsand punctuation, in written form but new research is showing that we evenmisinterpret those as well lol. So obviously body language can help us withthis problem but again for many of us that can be overwhelming to deal with inthe real world. That being said, writing body language still needs to berealistic and convey important information but in fiction we can process iteasier than if it was happening live in front of us.

Lucky for us, we are writing fanfiction and we have thosecharacters on our screen where we can watch them over and over in the privacyof our own homes with little distractions. If you are in the supercorp fandomthen even more lucky because we have some of the best gif makers in the entireSupergirl fandom and they are an absolute blessing. I think gifs are underratedwhen it comes to character analysis but they are so good for body languagestudy because you have a small amount of data input, three to ten seconds orso, and it automatically repeats so no pausing and rewinding back on Netflix oryour stream. So let us look at an example:

These gifs were created by @brielarsan and you can find the original post here.

Holy shit. This is a writer’s gold mine. I mean look atthis: we know Lena doesn’t have a lot of friends (really none at this point inS2, our poor precious baby *cries*). We know she only ever felt accepted by Lexand look what he did to the world and ultimately her. And we’ve seen the longgazes, the smiles, the lip bites between her and Kara/Supergirl. We alreadyknow all of this – we have this data! So in that mindset, what does this mean?What does that sudden breath mean for Lena when Kara finally opens the doorknowing what we know? She has found acceptance in someone else – Kara – someonewho knew she was a Luthor from the start but has put her belief in Lenaregardless. But even if you don’t know or don’t use all of this data look ather body! Look at her hands, for example. They are in a classic worry positionone that other characters have done (see Meredith Grey from Grey’s Anatomy asjust one example) and Lena has done this herself several times across many episodesbecause she is a soft precious baby who is really worried how others perceiveher. Now look at her facial expression. You can tell exactly when Kara openedthe door and realized it was Lena. Even though we can’t see Kara’s face we cantell from Lena’s face when Kara smiles because we see that relief on Lena’sface. And then in that second gif what does that little shy sway mean? What doyou pick up from her doing that? To me, she is not only relieved that Kara isletting her in her home and doesn’t seem at all freaked out that she is there butalso in a way she is in a giddy disbelief that she’s not being turned away akashe feels accepted (and of course these two fools love each other and we cansee that here). And look how we can see all of that in how her hands start torelax too! My biggest piece of advice is to study stuff like this and/or mimicit in your own fics. Also look at what people say about gifs in the tags! Its so frustrating when people don’t put anything in the tags and I can be guilty of it but some people do the type of interpretation I just did above in the tags of gif posts and you can learn a lot by seeing how others are interpreting a scene.

You really can’t do anything that I just mentioned above ifyou don’t have that talented person on your screen though. Lucky for us we havethe one and only Katie McGrath who conveys more character information in twoseconds of acting than some of the other characters on Supergirl do in anentire episode. I could probably write two pages of description based on thetwo short gifs above and that is all in thanks to Katie and her wonderfulness. Katieis also a perfect example at someone who puts her heart and soul into hercharacters. You can tell that by how she does her interviews and the in-depthanswers she provides. She really IS Lena on screen. Chyler is another greatexample on Supergirl. I mean, Chyler should be earning Emmys for her portrayalof Alex in both Season 1 and 2 but I’m biased (and Katie too for Lena’s character). Sasha Alexander as Maura Isleson the TNT’s now concluded show Rizzoli and Isles is yet another example thathas benefitted me. When you have amazing characters and actors/actresses behind them they can inspire you to write your best stuff and give you so much to workwith. 

Lastly one of the other things you can do is to read.Whether its published fiction or fanfiction just read and see how others are conveyingbody language. When you read a section and get that vivid imagery as a readerstop and evaluate that section. What did that author do to set up that scene foryou? How do they have the characters interacting with one another and theenvironment around them? If you ever get to beta for somebody take thatopportunity! It will give you the chance to read someone’s fic and be in themindset of editing where you are looking at how the story is coming togetherthrough dialogue and body language. Or you can even contact one of yourfavorite writers and just tell them about your favorite sections of their pieceand list the reasons why. Not only will you make that author’s day but that mayalso help get a conversation started where you can discuss the intricacies ofthe characters including body language. This is really how @stennnn06 and I gotstarted talking. We squealed about Katie (as we still do) but then we startedlooking at each other’s writing, beta-ing for one another, and collaborating. Ican’t speak for sten but I know that I write better after discussing Lena andour headcanons with her. You can try to get a beta for your stuff too! Whenyour beta starts analyzing your stuff and asking you questions it really putsit in perspective for you and you can learn so much. I can tell you right nowthat I learned more about one of MY OWN stories by having @mssirey beta it andgive me feedback.   

On another note, also check out some writing blogs for tips. @heywriters is a great source and would be a good start for you. You can alsogo to my blog on tumblr (not tumblr mobile) and I have a page on the right handside labeled ‘Writing References’ and you’ll find a bunch of sources. Just out ofcuriosity I searched ‘body language’ on the search function on my blog and itbrought up some good posts so maybe check those out too! 

I know this is long and probably not anything you wanted butthere is my advice :)

[benjamaan]

For two

11 January 2020

"He slowly half opened his eyes and peered through the darkened view, distorted by his eyelashes. Objects began forming. A large brown squarish thing on a white background. Colourful lines in neat rows along its front, divided. It was his bookshelf. And, it was another morning. And, he felt a pang of despair about what that meant. Getting out of bed, doing things. It was almost too much to bear. Sleep beckoned like some kind of hungover lover in need of something to grasp onto, to drag down with them into oblivion."

Fear… It's not exactly what I imagined it out to be when I was a kid. I learnt, through movies, to relate fear to a gasp and a scream as sweat pours down my back while some horrifying thing eats me. But the fear that life generally delivers is much more mundane, murky and insidious than any Demon from the Depths. I guess personifying it: making it something we can stand up to and slay, like the Balrog, is what many writers have done to relate fear and overcoming it to their readers.

But that never really got through to me. That's possibly why I've been so drawn in by the very popular self-help literature that is going around. For a year I've been reading about how to unf*** myself, lean in, buckle up, knuckle down, simplify and do only one thing. Sadly the result is that I've simply disintegrated into a jelly like blob that floats around in the endless depths waiting for scraps to come along that I can snare in my tendrils. It's actually very comforting.

I saw a picture the other day that had "comfort zone" on the left with a drawing of a donkey underneath. There are some more zones as one moves across the image to the right. "Fearful zone" was there and so was "learning zone". On the right hand side was some kind of "living my best life" zone and underneath was the image of a unicorn doing just that. It seemed to me that the goal of the picture was to motivate the viewer to stop being an ass. I immediately felt a familiar rush of excitement as the anticipation of finding a formula to winning at life started shooting dopamine around my brain. And I immediately started forwarding this picture around to let people know that I'd found the answer to life, the universe and Everything. And then it dawned on me… Maybe the point isn't to be the unicorn. Maybe I could rather look at the image like a map. Somewhere I could place myself. So that I know where I am and what my options are. Also, unicorns aren't actually real. Donkeys are real though and can actually be pretty helpful.

So maybe I want to be a donkey sometimes. Maybe I want to be cosy. And hey, I'm happy for you to hop on and get a slow leisurely ride to somewhere if I feel like moving. Or to help you pull some heavy load along. And also of course this image was not the answer to life, the universe and Everything. Because that's 42. "Four two"… Or "for two". As in the answer to this thing is for two of us to get through together sometimes.

And here is the part where I write "and that's okay…" But nevermind that actually. Because it doesn't need to be okay. Maybe it's not okay. Maybe it just is.

---

How does this post make you feel? I’d love to know :) Email me at benblaine@gmail.com

Relevant Imagery below

The zones of being.