#I've been preparing for this longer than you'll ever know...

[risestarkiss]

Soo...I can finally spill the beans.

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[knightyoomyoui]

The Price Of Becoming The Chosen ONCE [+18] (COMMISSIONED)

ft. TWICE's Mina (x Male Reader & other TWICE members)

TYPE: Fluff, Angst, Smut

WORD COUNT: 12064

REQUESTED/ORDERED BY: @vl-45

TAGS: cheating, blackmailing, sex slave, possession, harem, obsession

NOTE: One of the longest fics I've ever written because I really love the plot that OC has given to me. Thank you again for ordering and I hope you'll have a great time reading what I made for you!

DONATE OR REQUEST FOR COMMISSION HERE: https://ko-fi.com/knightyoomyoui

DESCRIPTION: It follows the story of YN as he goes through the challenges he has to face from the consequences of being the center of their decisions driven by their respective desires of claiming him, in contradiction to the thought that his life would only change for the better after being Mina's lucky boyfriend and getting introduced to the rest of the members.

==OO==

ACT 1

The crowd was packed inside the Ilji Art Hall, where more than a hundred ONCEs went for TWICE’s fan meet in accordance with their new comeback with “Strategy” featuring Megan Thee Stallion. Everybody started to find their seats and found everything all set up on the stage. The only one that was missing yet is the one they all came for.

They all went out and headed through the backstage. As the huge monitor began playing their MV teasers, they were given a go signal to begin entering the stage one by one. The crowd erupted in joy to see their favorite idols in person, waving their hands and presenting them their natural bright expressions written all over their faces.

TWICE were preparing themselves in a room. Some took this as a chance to rest for a while; others went for chit-chats or used their phones.

The manager then opened the door, signaling them that they can now enter the hall.

The girls made their signature greeting, and the remainder of the event followed. The fans were now given the chance to step up to the stage to get closer to meeting each member of TWICE and do as they please along with their own merch they want to be signed and gifts they purchased for them. Obvious to how they behave, the fans were rather shaking slightly in nervousness, acting strange due to shyness, while the rest were just calm and confident.

And that includes you.

Along with your recently bought Strategy album, including some TWICE-designed bubble fan with a penguin plushie, it’s definitely clear who is the specific person you’re most excited to interact with. You got to talk to Nayeon, Jeongyeon, Momo, Sana, and Jihyo… until it is time to move onto the next chair. She went to say goodbye to the other fan after you before she turned her attention to you.

Just like that, your composure that you’ve been preserving and holding since you arrived here immediately melted. You caught the first sight of Mina having eye-to-eye contact with you. It almost felt like everything went slow motion and blurry the longer you stared at her gummy smile.

“Hello, earth to ONCE?” She asked you, waving her hand in front of your face. You were even aware that you looked stupid in front of her, giving her the first ticket of making yourself an embarrassment. Your popping eyes and gaping mouth lowered down as your senses snapped back to the real world.

“O-oh! Uh- uhm, h-hi. Oh my god.” You quickly reshuffled yourself back into your proper posture. “I’m really so sorry, I was just-”

“Yeah, I get it. Still can’t believe it’s real, isn’t it?”

“Definitely.” You chuckled. “I don’t know if I’m just dreaming right now or not.”

“Wanna find out?” Mina asked you who didn’t get enough to respond quickly. Shortly afterwards, she lend her hand on you. “Hold my hand.”

“W-wha-” Mina just giggled at your malfunctioning state. She finds it hilarious that you’re acting funny with your panicking actions at the moment.

“We don’t got all the time, ONCE. If I were you I would take the-”

Without any further ado, you hurriedly put your fingers in contact to her hand. The touch sent shockwaves through your skin, goosebumps rising. “Holy shit, you are indeed real.”

“Language.” Mina shushed you.

“Oh s-sorry, pardon my bad mouth.”

“Hehe, it’s fine. It’s normal for adults to curse.” Mina waved it off. “I get it, you’re just too dumbfounded right now. Is this your first time?”

“Yes.” You answered with a nod. “I actually just had the opportunity to attend a fanmeet to finally see you girls for the first time. I mostly spent a lot of money just to get in here.”

“Aww I appreciate the dedication!” Mina was touched at your efforts. “May I know your name?”

“It’s YN.” You introduced yourself. “Been a ONCE since last year. I’m just new, I know but I did a lot of research to consider myself kinda knowledgeable about your careers currently.”

“You sure do love TWICE that much, huh.”

“Yeah, but mostly you are.” You quickly covered your mouth in surprise. Mina was left speechless at your confession between she teasingly laughed and amazed at your “accidental” remark.

“And I love the fact that I am your bias.” Mina expressed her pleasant reaction. “Great choice.” She gave a quick glance and a stoic look at the other members before laughing in which you can’t help but to join her.

“So what do you have for me here?” She switched the topic.

“Uhm I have my Strategy album here, I already heard all the tracks and I wanna say they are all amazing.”

“What’s your favorite track?”

“The title track and Like It Like It.”

“Ooh, we’re the same. High five!” She offered you again her hand, and it’s making you crazy knowing how lucky you are to get this once-in-a-lifetime opportunity to not only hold Mina’s hand but also to also share a surreal hand gesture with her. This is literally a next-level interaction you got here with her, and how dumb of you to just let it go to waste.

You slammed your palm onto hers, and both were glad at what they did. She reached for your album and signed it with her marking pen before giving it back to you as its owner.

“Thank you so much! And uhh, lastly I bought this for you.” You presented her the penguin plushie you were also carrying. “I hope you like it; I tried to find one of it that is as cute as you.”

Mina was satisfied with your compliment, pursing her lower lip and nodding at it. “And you certainly did accomplish that. I love it!” She grabbed your plushie and cuddled it with a smile. You felt touched seeing your bias enjoying your present despite how simple it is.

The manager then went behind Mina and looked at you both. “Time's up, Minari. Sir, you have to proceed.”

“Hey, take out your phone,” Mina commanded you, and you complied, quickly searching for it in your pocket and pulling it out. “Let me give you a memory to recall that’ll assure you these all happen for real. Let’s take a picture.”

You raised your phone, with your cheeks flushing from excitement and bliss. It then went all tomato when you heard what Mina said afterwards.

“Pinch my cheek.” She poked her cheek twice as she leaned her face on you. You just want to at least give Mina a warning message to take all these carefully and not too suddenly, as you feel like you’re about to get your heart exploding in flattery because of the effect she’s giving at you.

“O-okay.” You followed, placing your fingertips and pressing them on Mina’s soft and smooth cheeks. You are breathing heavily as you do so. Raising your phone and clicking on the screen, it captured this unforgettable moment you have shared with Mina.

“Thank you so much, Mina! I wish you and TWICE all the best for next year!”

“Thank you as well, YN. It’s nice to meet you.” You and Mina exchanged bows at one another before you switched chairs and face Dahyun next. Even without your figure in front of her, Mina couldn’t help to still follow you with her gaze. It was like she was struck by interest she couldn’t describe.

You also were throwing glances at her through the rest of the event before it ended. It was a lot of fun seeing them being the usual happy go lucky type of a group which also shows that they seemed like more of a family rather with how kind they treat each other. As you made your exit in the hall and enter your car, you let out every emotions you were holding while being inside there.

“I can’t believe it, I literally got inches up close with TWICE and Mina today. Best freaking day ever.” You muttered dreamily to yourself before driving your car away back to your home.

On the other hand, Mina couldn’t help but to rewind back her interactions with you. She saw the potential of you being a great friend to get along with because of the quality of your attitude. It made her a little bashful when she silently admitted that she was more impressed, as along with your personality comes an attractive appearance as well.

Fortunately, the eyes of the fans along with their opinions aligned with Mina’s initial thoughts. Scrolling through social media, she found a couple of clips from the fan meet that feature her interaction with you from different angles. Checking the comment section, it was filled with numerous words from other ONCEs positively agreeing that she, along with you, has made a fascinating, adorable moment together, which made her grin.

It truly was suck when Mina remembered that she’ll never meet you personally again. That is until one day, she was proven by her thoughts to be all mistaken when she visited her favorite bakery shop. As she was about to order, she encountered a familiar face in the cashier.

“W-wait what? Oh my…”

“Oh, it’s you!” Mina’s face lightened. “You’re the fan I got to talk last fanmeet. YN, right?”

“No freaking way, she actually remembered my name?” You were in appalled at the mention all brought by her sharp memory.

“Y-yes, that was me.” You said. “It’s very unexpected to meet you here again.” said sheepishly.

“I am too, I didn’t even know you work here at my favorite bakery.” She admitted.

“Well I just moved here yesterday after I got accepted from the job. It’s just a part-time, want to find something worth my time to be independent of.” You shared.

“So you also live here close?”

“Almost.”

“Really? Well…” She gestured you to come closer in which you did. “This shouldn’t be told to others, but I just want to inform you that I also live around here as well.” She whispered.

“Oh. Wow, it’s really making me very lucky to see and talk with you again.” You said. “But uhh, why did you told me that easily for me?”

Your question had Mina baffled as well at her decision. She came up with a reason rather, one that she could relate the most. “I… I don’t know, well atleast I didn’t told you where I exactly live, you know.”

You scratched your head as you understood her point late. “Oh yeah, my bad. Boundaries.”

Mina agreed silently and giggled at your guilty demeanor. “It’s okay.”

“So, Miss Myoui may I have your order please?”

Mina spoke out about her preferred bread to buy for breakfast. You tried to maintain the good performance, especially since this is a hugely popular celebrity as one of your customers; you don’t want to put shame on yourself, this new job you have, and your manager. After placing them on the paper bags, you handed them to her, in which you received money bills from Mina.

After securing the payment, you greeted Mina politely. “Thank you for coming, Miss Myoui! Have a nice day!”

“You too, YN.” As she was about to step outside with her manager, she rotated her feet back to the opposite direction, approaching you again on the counter which perplexed you. “Is there any concerns, Miss Myoui?”

“Perhaps you’ve seen about how we are trending right now in K-Pop media. Did you see the videos of us from the fanmeet few days ago?”

“Oh that, yeah. I was stunned that we hooked most of attentions to us that day.” You shyly said.

“I actually think you’re a good person to hang along with, YN. The fans seems to agree and so do I.” She curiously stated. “If I say I’m giving you a chance to be friends with me too, would you take it?”

“Y-you want me… to be friends with you?”

You were mindblown at her invitation. What in the timeline of this universe are you living in? you thought to yourself. What deeds have you done for you to be granted to step into this situation, standing face to face with Myoui Mina, a member of your favorite girl group TWICE, asking you to be friends with her?

At first these are all a dream to imagine. As much as you wanted to ask her again if these are all real, you don’t want yourself to have trouble acting normally in front of her again. You just stared at Mina, completely astounded.

“Yes.” Mina repeated again that she has made the decision. She looked at her manager who is giving her cautious gazes but Mina looks to prevent and calm it down with her assuring one. “It’s fine if you don’t. I get it, it’s not okay for an idol to be closer with a-”

“I accept.” You cut her off to show how much willing you are. “I mean, who in their right minds wouldn’t want to have as someone like you in their life.”

Mina felt fluttered at your praise. She showed again her usual gummy smile. “You’re too soft-spoken for me.”

“Because you deserve it.” You shrugged.

You and her stared at one another before she bid goodbye to you and thanked you again for accepting her. In the middle of your job, you have lost your mind processing the truth that Myoui Mina is seriously one of your little amount of friends now. At the van, Mina was warmed to know that you didn’t care about the distinction between your roles in life as a basis for developing a close connection together.

ACT 2

“My manager would be here in 5 minutes.” Mina said after checking the time on her phone. “Thank you for agreeing to this, YN.”

You and Mina cooperatively took each step on growing your closeness together through various ways. Even if it meant for Mina to look like a complete anonymous person to the public with her black jacket, shades, and pants, as long as she got to be with you anytime you two wanted to hang out, it was no bother to her. Meanwhile, your respect and admiration for Mina’s determination of being a true friend who assures that she gets to be present by your side when you need her grows each time that passes.

The two of you would get to know each little detail about yourselves,, whether through conversations, hobbies each of you was joined to participate in, and sometimes deep talks where you and Mina would spill some worries that just can’t get out of your head and chest that easily.

Then Mina picked up this idea she had to strengthen your trust and make your bond stronger when she sent you a message that made you bewildered during your duty at the bakery. As usual, you wanted to reconfirm if what she said was true, so you asked her again. She really didn’t have any typos or a short out-of-trance moment while she was constructing the message: she actually wants to bring you to their dorm.

Her reason: she admitted that hiding her identity in the public, which wasn’t her cup of tea to be in, is draining her. That’s why she requested you to do something for her this time, which you considered a test as well to observe how you are engaged to allow Mina to spend some time with you as a friend personally.

Without any hesitation, you granted it. You showed up at her meeting place, the coffee shop she chose. Your presence immediately plastered joy on her face.

“No problem. I should do the same for you this time, you know.”

“I thought you’ll protest or reject my invitation because of how absurd it is.” Mina retorted in a tensed manner. “But I’m glad you didn’t.”

“Actually I did thought you didn’t meant it or what. Maybe you have forgotten about the line we don’t have to cross, or yeah let’s say privacy.” You said calmly. “Like, why would you let me be in to your own personal space, Mina.”

“You’re not a stranger to me anymore, YN. You’re my friend.”

“I know. But sometimes I do feel like I’ve barely been known yet for you to trust me this much. I don’t deserve this special treatment I’m-”

“Stop it.” You felt chills when Mina looked at you seriously. “You are already special to me. Think about it, how many ONCEs I had to be close and accept them in as my friend from outside. Nobody but you, that’s why whatever you at it, you deserved to receive it from me because you’re lucky to be.”

You nodded, Mina’s assurance effectively comforting you. “Why I get to be the one then, Mina?”

“Why do you ask? Do you hate it?” Mina subtly looked at you.

“N-no, I just… I just wanna know what did you truly see in me that makes me be the deserving one to know everything about you.”

Mina became silent for a moment as she thought about it. She avoided her gaze to rewind and search for clues she could provide as a reasonable answer aside from your good personality.

“Tell me first, why did you came here to be with in the first place then?” She threw the question back at you.

“Because… I want you to keep believing in me.” You replied. “I don’t want to destroy everything that makes me who I am for you, it would be as if I just let this opportunity to become friends with you to be ruined. I… want to keep you around me, Mina.”

Mina reciprocated your hug to her and buried her face more at your chest. “Seriously, YN. What are we now? I… This feeling I have, I know it’s more than just a friend for you. It may be wrong for others, but I couldn’t help it.”

Mina’s serious expression transitioned into a beaming one. She stepped closer to you and looked up to meet your eyes. “There it is. Why should I be asked if you already knew the answer yourself? I just simply like everything about what you do, because we both know that I’m the motivation for all of it, not because I’m your bias from TWICE, but because I’m just me, a girl named Mina.”

“And to give you one as well, I want us to be fair here.” You couldn’t help it; Mina felt her breath taken away when you trapped her in your embrace. She felt so little around your arms, and she loved how cozy and warm it is to be stuck with you.

“For the first time in my life, I’ve never felt so valuable in someone’s life. That’s why I’d like to be in your company, because you’re giving me purpose to keep on living, not only because I have to strive for my own deficit, but to show that I am also important at who I am.”

“Let yourself fall, Mina. I’ll be here to catch you anyway.”

Both of you stared at one another, as you can view Mina’s surprised reaction that you do share a mutual agreement at her feelings for you. You winked at her and grinned before you continued. “But, let’s just go with the process. We can take things slow. Then, if we’re ready, we can do as we please.”

Mina nodded and giggled at the wonderful idea. “I absolute love that.”

You kissed her hooded head and hugged her tighter, just seconds before her manager and driver stopped the van in front of you two. “Hop in, lovebirds.” She already teased you both, in which you have failed to make yourselves look innocent.

The ride wasn’t that long as like Mina said, she was actually just a bit close to where you live. Upon your discovery, TWICE are currently staying this is giant luxury hotel around your area. The van entered the gates and it parked in front of the entrance.

“Hurry, we might get seen.” She immediately led you both to the elevator in which Mina can now remove her mask as hoodie safely.

Reaching the floor they inputted on the buttons, you knew that you are feet up from the ground because of how slightly tensed your legs are acting through every footstep. Manager unnie stopped in front of one of the doors and unlocked it.

“Thank you, unnie.” Mina greeted.

“Go ahead, you two. And oh…”

Both of you halted.

“I’ll just gonna pretend I didn’t saw what I’ve seen earlier.” She smirked before entering her room, leaving you both shy from being caught.

“Well that’s a pretty lame start on making ourselves look obvious.” You commented, Mina chuckled.

“This way.”

Mina approached the last door at the end of the hallway, she inputted a passcode on it before it unlocked. You felt even more nervous to enter knowing that you’re about to step onto the place where you only just used to see from their vlogs.

“Come in.”

“H-hello.”

“U-uhh, o-okay.”

You stepped inside and removed your shoes. A short hallway greeted you at first before you followed Mina behind to pass through it. After you reached the brighter end, the entire wide area of their room emerged, and in your overwhelmed state, you got to see some of the other members in the living room, just in their simple house attire.

Jihyo and Sana are just watching TV on the couch while Tzuyu is studying something on her phone based on the pen and notebook she had prepared in front of her. As they felt Mina’s arrival, they all got to see you as well, which made them panicked.

“Oh, Mina! And you, the famous ONCE who a fanboy of our penguin here.” Sana cheerfully pointed at you in which you bowed in return.

“Welcome to our house… YN, correct?” Jihyo asked for clarification.

“Yes.”

“Not saying noona, I see. Are you older than Nayeon unnie?”

“A year older.” You confirmed.

“Oh, interesting.” Jihyo nodded. “Well, hi again. Make yourself comfortable, okay? Mina, why don’t you make our guest comfortable around would ya?”

“Okay, unnie. Thank you for allowing me to bring him in.”

“Always for you, Minari.” She responded which both of them smiled. You and her went to the kitchen. Meanwhile, unbeknownst to your idea, Jihyo and Sana were sharing the same sentiment.

“Yeah, it’s a wise choice to allow him here.” She meant in a different meaning, bouncing her eyebrows and smirked.

“Right? He really does look handsome up close.” Sana agreed.

Tzuyu can hear her unnies’ conversation, and even she couldn’t blame them for being like that. She almost got distracted at her lesson in psychology class when her eyes landed on your impressive figure present in front of her.

Back at your situation with Mina, she offered you a seat, which you gratefully took. She poured a glass of orange juice per your request and instantly made you a sandwich. As you sheepishly ate the food, Mina just admiringly watched you.

“You can just say if you want more, okay? Feel free and get used being around here because from now on you’ll be in here frequently.”

“Uh… I won’t object anymore if that’s what you want to happen. I actually would like to meet the other members as well.” Your die-hard inner ONCE wishing for a miracle to become close with them speaking for yourself, because it knew that this is the perfect fantasy for you to live onto.

“Some of them are in their room, but Jeongyeon unnie and Dahyun aren’t around though. One is in her family house and the other is currently filming her movie.”

“Oh okay. I actually don’t expect them to be all around here anyway, I know all of you have different schedules and busy with your own solo projects occurring.” You said. “I’m contented enough to atleast get to meet the others.”

“Speaking of right timing.” Mina turned her attention from your back. “Hai Momo chan”

“Oh, you brought your boyfriend with you.” She teased, making Mina blush in heat.

“We’re just friends…” She defensively said under her breath.

“So far.” You looked at her to join along Momo’s playful antics and Mina glared at you to stop in which you wheeze internally.

“Hi, nice to meet you. You must know me already, but for formal manner, let me do the honor again. I’m Momo.” She lend her hand on you.

“YN.” You touched her hand. It lasted for seconds, you swore it would be just a while but it felt like Momo tightened her grip a bit more. Mina’s fake cough startled you both which Momo gave in to the gesture. “Sorry, I noticed you have a large hand and your grip is strong. You’re working out aren’t you?”

“Yeah. Actually… I kind of got inspired of you and Jihyo’s workout clips I’ve been seeing in my feed so yeah.”

“Oh, really? Woah, that’s great! Momo laughed at the revelation. “Glad that we could also influence others for body fitness. Health is wealth, as what they say.”

“Yeah it did helped me a lot to feel better.”

“Hey, if you like. Maybe you can ask permission to your girlie there and join me and Jihyo, we could use some gym buddy to drag along and introduce you to some other techniques to get fit.” She playfully punched your arm lightly and you chuckled.

“Momo…” Mina groaned at another attempt of her bestfriend making fun of her.

“Hehe, sorry. Anyways, are you in, YN?” She crosses her arm, waiting for your decision.

“Yeah, I could get used to adapt some other exercises.” You said.

“Great! Now excuse me, I would like to grab my mac and cheese on the fridge.” She said.

As you and Mina continued to talk, Momo was sneaking glances at your concentrated manner at her bestfriend while speaking. Just like the previous three co-members of hers, her curiosity piqued at the charm you possess.

“I should be the one who is thanking a lot here, Mina. All of what transpired today, I’ll never forget it. This is what I dreamed of, to meet you all and I knew before that knowing you girls personally would be like once in a blue moon but… you girls changed my life and made it possible. And its all because of you, Mina. Take all the credit, it’s yours.” You stated, breathing deeply to sink in everything that you have encountered today.

She left the kitchen with her bowl of food, crossing paths with Jihyo and Sana looking at her as they gestured the direction, referring to you. Momo just mouthed “wow” and lifted her eyebrows while grinning, in which they chuckled. Returning to her room, she took a mental note to prepare anytime once you visit.

During your hours of stay in the dorm, you also get to meet Chaeyoung and Nayeon, who were busy at their stuff in their respective rooms. They asked you some things regarding being a fanboy for their group and shared how this all still feels surreal for you. Understanding the luck you have, they just laughed and assured you to provide what brings you comfort and peace being with them.

As the sky starts to get darker, Mina escorted you in the lobby of their hotel. Stopping in the middle of the space, she looked at you and smiled gratefully. “Thank you for coming, YN. I really appreciated you being thoughtful to me.”

Mina bowed and held your arm. “About us… we’ll get there, right?”

“I know we are. I won’t let it end anyway.”

You bid goodbye to her as the manager instructed you to enter their service van. Mina watched you depart as she remained in her spot. Mentally, she wished you a ride home safely.

Unbeknownst to the both, all other six members were gathered in the living room, exchanging their first impressions about meeting you.

“He looks pretty cute and a hottie too.” Momo said. “I was almost caught getting blank for a second there, the more I just at his face it’s like… it’s sucking me into his facial features. Good thing I found an excuse to save myself in humiliation there.”

“What got me rather is how huge he looked.” Nayeon bit her lip hungrily, eyes darting sideways. “He looks like a buff baby, and God what I’d give to have a muscle guy like him and crush my head around his triceps.”

“Yeah, we get it. It’s your type unnie, but I think you have to get through us first.” Chaeyoung interrupted. “You made some good points though, damn I’d wish he’ll destroy me with his size.” She shut her eyes and smiled lewdly.

“Woah Chaeng, getting there already?” Jihyo was amused.

“But… I think YN is into Mina unnie already.” Tzuyu joined the chat. They all looked at her and those words had them in dismay. “From how they’ve been so close together earlier, it’s no denial he’s into her.”

“Yeah, but… would Mina be the same?” Sana asked.

“She probably is.” Nayeon said. “Sucks that we all went head over heels already for one guy who is already taken.” She chuckled with a bitter taste.

Mina then opened the door of their dorm, making them pause the topic. “YN is on his way home now.”

“Good. Mina, you sure did pick a good man aren’t you?” Jihyo said.

“I have no regrets, unnie.” She smiled before disappearing to her room.

They all looked back at one another, sharing the same thoughts. However, their expressions is displaying mixed emotions for their beloved friend and sister-figure.

“She is indeed attracted to YN.” Sana said.

Throughout the next weeks, your visit to their place has become regular as suggested and planned. You also finally got to meet Jeongyeon and Dahyun when they were fortunately present in the dorm, taking a break from their hectic schedule. Without your knowledge, the two also suppressed similar interest towards you, much like the others.

Being often at their place granted you the opportunity to form a close connection as well with the other members aside from Mina. It was a great thing to discover their personalities more aside from what you just speculated through seeing them on the media with their content and projects. The consequence of that, however, is that you weren’t aware that you’re transforming into a chick magnet, with how the girls are now attracted to you both perspective-wise and emotionally.

And the best aspect you have attempted with her is introducing yourselves to having sex. You have seen Mina being a bit nervous and scared at your first take with her, which is a relief that it still ended on a positive note, pleasing you in a new direction.

For example, in Nayeon’s case, she would find herself sneakily touching your built physique when she finds a chance to do so. Jeongyeon’s heart throbs when you shower her with compliments regarding your appreciation for her appearance despite the struggles she went through; Momo would position herself to showcase her sexy figure whenever you work out with her.

Sana and her clingy personality, where she’ll just randomly hug you anytime only to get a touch of your muscles, Jihyo started wearing tops that break her cleavage free whenever she learns you’ll be coming after observing you one time inevitably peeking at her assets in the gym, while Dahyun, who is aware of her curves, began using skin-tight dresses that trace her sculpted hourglass figure after admitting that it makes her look fabulous.

Lastly, the two other maknaes, Chaeyoung and Tzuyu, who love getting praised for being great at what they are, have frequently shown you in an eye-catching manner.

They knew what they were doing was wrong since you and Mina are undoubtedly about to develop a bond that is sweeter than just being friends, but it’s so irresistible when they just have to rarely have some guy around with them and it turns out to be hotter and more accurate than the dream guy they wanted to love in the future. They were just being a little hesitant, limiting their actions at first on what they were doing, brought by their dilemmas, until they couldn’t hold it in anymore.

The more you pull them closer into you, the more they want you for themselves to claim and won’t let go.

In the midst of their methods of alluring and flirting towards you, their speculation went true as you and Mina called it official to be a couple months later. Living into the promise that both won’t hold back now that you are now in a relationship with the ideal woman you always wanted to date, you and Mina explored ways to make this journey with her more desirable.

What do you mean by that is the amount of circumstances where she would beg for your cock anytime she gets a free time to unwind or taking you to different places aside from your house and look for a spot to fuck. There is none that she’ll not make you satisfy her being full of cum whether in her holes or through her flawless skin.

Spending a vacation in a private resort with her, other TWICE members and staffs became a usual day for the both of you to have some sex whenever the urge brings you both together. After chugging your fifth alcohol and the combination of Mina being needy for you, she led you in one of the trees away from the group and pounce at you like a hungry animal.

Mina planted kisses around your topless body all the way from the bottom to the top where she turns herself to your neck and mauled at it. You guided her head deeper into your skin before you had enough and brought her into a wild make-out session. Lips colliding, tongues swirling, and saliva connecting your warm mouths controlled with lust.

“I need you so bad right now.” Mina said as she caressed your abs while your foreheads are pressing to one another.

“We don’t have much time, Mina. Let’s get this done or else might get caught by them.” You said as you pecked her lips again.

“Just promise me we’ll continue this later when they sleep.”

“We can.”

Mina absorbed your powerful manhood into her snatch, encircling it with immense tightness. She moaned as you began to thrust your hips again and pick up the pace slowly.

Mina went on her knees as you lower her down with your hand on top of her head. Along her movement, she dragged your lower garment on your feet, exposing your raging cock now in its maximum size ready to be serviced by your horny girlfriend.

She grasped it from the base and performed an introductory stroke before putting the mushroom tip on her puckered lips as she inhaled your scent. Mina pushed forward, the shaft now lodged inside her mouth, and began her blowjob as you held her head for assistance.

You quickly buckled your hips to hurry this up, not giving a damn about Mina’s gag reflex from how you hit the back of her throat repeatedly. She clung tightly at your waist as you used her for your own pleasure, admiring your rough treatment that satisfies her as well.

The girth of your manhood is being coated with saliva by her flirty tongue as she takes you all in, desperate for your incoming reward for her efforts. She looked up at you, confirming that her performance is sending wonders to your senses just by the look of your lustful face.

Thrusting your hips further, Mina’s nose is now bumping at your crotch. She then felt your length twitching in her mouth, a familiar signal of what’s about to happen afterwards, a very anticipatory one.

Gripping her hair, you stuck your cock in her mouth as you filled it with your creamy deposit. She lost the number of times you fired straight through her throat, but she didn’t care; all that matters is that she get to receive it all by herself.

You gently slid in your slimy cock at her mouth. Mina opened her mouth to present a pool of cum. “Swallow.” And she did exactly as you told her, gulping it easily before releasing her mouth to prove no leftovers.

“Good girl. Now get up and bend your ass for me, babe. Let’s finish this.” You helped Mina to stand and changed positions. Mina is now facing the tree and bending slightly for you.

Kneeling behind her, you quickly undressed her swimsuit to unveil her plump ass that made most ONCEs go crazy when she twerked it like a professional during their concert. You feel bad for some who are dying to grab a handful of these tasty buns, but now you’ll fulfill their wishes by taking these into your own hands.

You sniffed her ass for a second and slapped both really hard before you got up and rubbed your length across her valley. “Place it in me, please.” You wasted no more time as you pushed it forward inside her inviting hole.

Her arms embraced the tree as you pummeled through her rear, deliciously watching her skin ripple as you collided your skin into hers. It creates wet slapping sounds that both of you are getting turned on more by.

“Ugh yes yes fuck, you’re so big inside of me, YN.” Mina whimpered as you glided your hands through the surface of her godly sculpted back. Bracing yourself, you wrapped her body close as you fucked her ass faster.

The volume of her moans and stutters increasing. “Sshhh be still or somebody might find us here.” Mina then closed her mouth, her muffled screams as her ass continously being filled to the brim by your magnificent cock.

“Shit. I’m about to bust, Mina.” You went all in to your rhythm, sending her body vibrating at your rough hammering. A last plopping sound, and your crotch pressed at her tempting asscheeks as you unleashed another load of cum inside of her.

Mina huffed as she felt your cock exit her hole and some cum pouring out from her used passage. You scooped some and have Mina taste it to make every drop count.

You both put back your undergarments. “Let’s go, they must be looking for us now.” you said as you pulled Mina with you out of the woods.

ACT 3

Few days later, you were chilling at the kitchen stool, watching some memes at your phone to entertain yourself. Mina is currently at Japan to join her parents visit her late dog’s resting place since its his death anniversary if you remember correctly. You decided instead to hang out with other members to spend your free time.

Footsteps approaching, you turned around to see Momo now changed into her oversized t-shirt after working out with you earlier. She took the chair beside you.

“You can use our bathroom if you want to wash yourself.” Momo said as she noticed your body now dried up from getting sweat drenched at lifting weights.

“Nah I’m good, I’m about to leave now anyway. I can just wash at my home later.” You replied. “Why, do I stink?”

“Yes, it makes me want to puke actually.” She fake acting like she’s having nausea. Seeing your offended and sheepish reaction broke her out of laughter. “Just kidding, you still smell great.”

She leaned closer, sniffing your neck to confirm it, yet again oblivious to her true intention, her burning temptation influencing her to take measures that will get you real good.

“Yeah, you smell manly as ever.” Momo muttered. You stiffened, awkwardly letting Momo breath closely at your skin.

“Thanks, I guess.” You thriftly smiled.

Momo just tightened her lips and just watched you scroll through your Instagram feed. She prepared herself first as what she made sure to remember last time before proceeding with her main agenda of interacting with you.

“How are things between you and Mina?”

“Pretty smooth. I’m glad we could manage despite her busy schedules as an idol.”

“That’s good, yeah. What about being careful, have you guys always ensure that this thing between you and Mina remains private?”

“We do, we haven’t being caught yet or so does her by the K-Media, like we know Dispatch is famous for spotting idols meeting up with mysterious person. Yeah, I haven’t got any news yet about Mina having a rumored boyfriend. So yeah, we’re safe.”

“Oh. Even the people around you aside from the media whenever you guys outside?”

“Positive.”

“Is that so.” Momo pulled out her phone and opened it. “Can you explain this to me then?”

Momo stole your attention from your phone as she made watch a video playing in her device. To your shock, it features a recording of you and Mina having sex secretly in the resort.

“What the-” You said as Mina getting backshot from you illuminated through your eyes. “H-how did you get this?”

“I followed you both shortly after you two left, I was heading to the bathroom for a piss break when suddenly… I heard some moans and clapping sounds near me.” Momo recalled.

“Then this is what I found.” She told you seriously. “Now tell me, where’s the cautious part in there?”

“Momo, it’s not that-”

“I don’t give a shit if you two are having sex in public area, I just want you to think that what if it’s not me who saw you both and instead either some personnel from the hotel or one of our staffs? What would you do if this gets out of hand and get you both exposed by this act?” Momo scolded you.

“It’s Mina who brought us there, okay? It’s not like I wanted us to fuck there. I was telling her that we can do this later but she didn’t listened.” You defended.

“But it’s your responsibility as a boyfriend to remind her what’s right. Mina can be stubborn sometimes, I know her like the back of my hand already, so you should know better as well now that you and her are now together.” Momo stood by her point. “What made you to let her? Were you scared that you won’t get that fuck she’s craving for because she’s sulk-”

“Enough!” You slammed your hand on the table, pent up by her blabbering until your senses reminded you that this is one of the women you’ll forever have an honor to get to know with, and you swore before that if you’ll get a chance to meet them personally, you won’t do any harm on them.

And it seems that you broke that when you saw Momo shocked and frightened at your unexpected temper.

“I-I’m sorry, I- I get it, okay. It was wrong of me and I won’t do it again but…. what I don’t understand is that why do you need to record this as well? I mean, you can just say what happened and I’ll surrender because I know it’s true. What’s the use of this for then?” You said, directing your hand at the video.

“Now you’ve asked, well… I thought of something that I can make what I want possible through this.” She tapped her finger at the table, her expression shifting into something mischievous and naughty.

“What are you talking about?”

“You want me to delete this? You have to do something for me first- oh should I say, to US first.”

“What the fuck? Are you seriously blackmailing me with our sex tape?” You ridiculously asked. You are in utter disbelief right now of this true color of Momo.

“Guess you can put it like that.” She shrugged. “Yeah, we can forgive you for being so reckless to our friend and hold the consequences if you’ll do us a favor.”

“And what is that?”

Momo moved her chair, closing her gap between you two. “Fuck the rest of us just like how you do to Mina.” She smirked as she stared at your flabbergasted face.

You couldn’t process what Momo is asking you to do for her, and damn sure you weren’t expecting that she’ll have this side that’ll be very disliking of you. The once admirable and inspirational idol turned to be someone worse than you could imagine. Even adding to this horrible situation, she’s just doing this on behalf of a group consisted of people you also believed at first to be pure and innocent.

“You got to be kidding me.” You shook your head. “Are you out of your mind, Momo? Have you been hearing yourself? You’re committing a sin with this! You’re betraying Mina for God’s sake!”

“I KNOW! BUT I COULDN’T TAKE IT ANYMORE!” Momo has snapped, she stood fiercely at you.” AND SO WAS THEM. We tried, but… ever since you stepped foot in our dorm, we found you so attractive in everything. You have it all that most of us wanted a guy to have. Then when we learned that Mina already have you. We tried to be happy for our friend but it pains us as well that we couldn’t have the same.” Momo explained what led her to do this.

“Until we have accepted the fact that we couldn’t have your heart like she does. But… we might atleast get another piece of you that doesn’t require feelings to attain. Something that had us obssessing over you since the beginning.”

She crawled her hands at your arm and cupped your biceps, squeezing its firm yet toughness. “Mina can love you with all her heart and soul, as for your body though… maybe we can just share it ourselves for free.”

Her hands roams down to your side figure until it reaches the hem of your shirt. Momo single handedly removed it for you and you just remained stiffened at your spot as you watched her in confusion.

“And we know you’ll let us, right? You were probably dreaming of having us in your way when you were just a random fan of us.” After throwing your shirt on the floor, Momo then began to undress herself, and your eyes largened at her matching pair of lacy red bra and panties she’s wearing underneath, gulping at how incredibly sexy she actually is. It’s undeniable that every detail of her figure is a sight to behold, a complete package from head to toe that every man would die for.

She grabbed your hand and forced you to stand up. “You’ll be our personal sex slave and we’ll delete the video. Don’t worry, she don’t have to know about what we’re doing. Unless, you want us to separate Mina away from you and never see us again.”

You were horrified at the consequences Momo is considering in case you disobey their conditions. For the sake of your relationship with Mina, you frowned in worry as Momo lift your chin up to her stare at her bare naked body and her devious gaze.

“Do we have a deal with that, YN?”

Without any other choice, you wanted to save you and Mina to these ladies you once treated as supportive friends but has now turned into betraying envy admirers who wants to gain access of your body for free use.

You nodded in response to her question. Momo then started to kiss you passionately, putting touches around your chest and torso as well. She then led your hands on top of her bulging breasts and massage them to match Momo’s expectations.

She let go for a while and dragged you along her. Exiting the kitchen, you saw the rest of the girls all sitting on the living room. Momo looked at them as your lack of clothing together stole their attention.

“He agreed. We’ll be right back.” She exclaimed. You view their grins expanded with a hint of thirst and desperation for your affection.

You followed Momo and got pushed inside her room where after being locked by her, both went through hours of heated and wild rounds of sweaty sex on her bed. She was moaning and screaming in pleasure as you just focused on giving her everything she wanted from you.

Momo was laid in various positions based on what she wanted you to perform, whether its pinning and fucked her like a ragdoll around your cock on the wall, making the bed quake and squeak with your manhandling of her body, or pound her while she’s pressed on the cold floor.

She titfucked your thick cock with some short combinations of blowjob included and have it erupt with streaks of cum that splattered around her chest to finish your time with her.

ACT 4

The equipments would also receive additional purpose not just for a simple exercise as you would attempt to utilize it on pleasuring Nayeon, like making her bounce up and down in your cock while her legs split open, relying her balance on wrapping your head from behind.

Months have passed, and your new purpose for the girls proceeded without Mina having any idea about the huge unforgivable sin you’re committing. She returned weeks after Momo had you in her control. The poor girlfriend had no clue what the walls of their dorm had witnessed every day without her presence roaming around.

Their sexual needs over you intensified, and even with the possibility of Mina arriving home, you still had to do it to every member, depending on who was in the mood to beg for your cock and worship it as their ultimate prize. Whenever Mina closes the door and leaves their place, one of them—or hell, a pair or a divided group by them—would just suddenly pounce on you to take the availability.

You have taken a taste on every single one of them because of this forbidden deal, and they made these all possible in accordance with what they want to happen with you. They have taken turns on you, and you only have one objective to accomplish for them: never leave them not being blessed by your cum all over their spent body after accompanying them anywhere.

Nayeon once took you with her to be her guardian on her pilates schedule. While the coach is gone to attend some urgent stuff, Nayeon would instantly pull down your shorts and shove you cock up in her mouth.

In addition, you showered with Jeongyeon as well. Their water bill about to double because of how much water you both have wasted being tangled together. You fucked Jeongyeon while she stands on one leg with another being lifted, then she finished you off by cumming onto her mouth. Following that, you helped each other apply soap and wash off your bodies.

Sana and Momo had threesome with you. At first you thought it would be a struggle to ensure that both of them will be satisfied equally, but due to how needy these girls for you and them acting like an experts for these thing, they have guided you properly.

It made you to shuffle yourselves in different positions, either taking their pussy and ass at the same time with your cock and talented fingers as they make out or them making your mouth work as the another returns the same at your cock. They also probably had the longest time you spent having sex with.

Jihyo likes her being called your mommy, and she is very welcome to treat you as her little baby. To do so, she would either instruct you to lay on her lap as she sat on the couch and suck her tits alternatively while she jerks off your cock or taking care of you with her massive puppies and oral skills. She also surprised you with a fact that she’s carrying breastmilk already despite not being pregnant yet, a result of having great genes.

Dahyun is the most submissive and gentle type of one; she prefers vanilla sex rather than being banged up, unlike some of her co-members, especially Chaeyoung. The amount of suffering you endured for this small but terrible woman when it came to sex was unmeasurable. This dominant lady won’t let your balls store a single drop of cum for her after edging your cock for an hour and encourages you to piston her tight petite body however she wants to.

And lastly, Tzuyu was almost the same as Dahyun. The only difference was that she wants to switch roles in the bed while maintaining the same pace of the session. It’s kind of strange as well that she’s probably the least TWICE member you came inside of, as she offers instead her big fat thighs for you to also inject your cock in between and blast cum for her gifted asset.

“What’s going on with you lately, YN?” Mina started the topic. “Care to share what’s bothering you, babe?”

You have lost count of how many times you did it while handling your relationship with Mina and your sex life with her too. That’s why it resulted in you becoming physically weak, sympathizing for your emotional and mental state that is also being affected as well.

It didn’t slip into Mina’s perspective for her boyfriend. Her caring instincts for you alerting about the sudden strange transformation of your appearance and mood were noticed. She could also differentiate how you were before than this recent change you’re having.

Always lost in thoughts, gloomy, and quiet. You even reject her, setting yourselves up for another round of sex. That is how Mina would describe you currently. Since this is not the usual you that she loved, it grew concern in her.

That’s why one day, she confronted you in a must. You were just watching the landscape of Seoul beneath from the pavement when Mina approached you from behind with coffee in hand. She looked at your side figure and again, she knew something is wrong.

You gulped and lowered your head a bit more. “There’s n-nothing. Why would you ask?”

“You’ve been not acting like yourself lately. I can see it all.” Mina explained. “You rarely laugh or smile so geniunely at me, it was those that powers me up everyday but… you’ve been so lacking with everything that I couldn’t help but to ask if there’s anything going on with you.”

“None. I’m fine, Mina. Really.”

“But you’re not okay. Don’t set me aside, please. I’m your girlfriend, YN. I should be helping you.”

“What part of what I just said that you don’t understand, Mina?” You glanced at her in frustration. The tension gets heavier, until you’ve realized that you almost just shouted at Mina who only just think of your well-being.

“S-sorry. I didn’t mean to raise my voice. Seriously, Mina. I’m fine.” You shook your head and turned away at her.

Mina wasn’t thrilled at your sudden complain. She came forward and hug you from behind, her comfort almost broke the emotions you’ve trying to hold as much as your can. “You can tell me anything, you know? I love you, and I have to make sure that I share the problems with you. For us to fix together.”

Your body trembled, every words coming out of her mouth felt like a dagger to your chest. “I can’t.”

“You are. I’m always here to listen, don’t put pressure on yourself.” Mina said.

“No, you don’t understand. This is something you can’t handle.”

“Then make me.”

“If I did, you won’t be able to look at me the same again.”

“Is it being insecure again, YN? We’ve talked about this before.”

“No. This is new.”

“What is it?”

“I’ve being torn apart in guilt, Mina.” One of your teardrops finally went loose from your sore eyes. “I don’t know if how long am I going to do this, but I’m just holding on for you.”

“Is there’s something you’re not telling me about, YN?”

You breathed heavily and composed your posture, preparing for the storm impending to come. “I’m sorry. I’m really sorry, Mina.”

“For?”

“I’ve risked something to keep ourselves together. It was wrong but… there was no other option.”

“What is it?”

“Dignity.” A dreaded expression went visible in your face.

“What’s this have to do with your dignity, YN?” Mina cautiously asked, as a strange feeling creeping inside her is telling that she may not digest what you’re about to say.

“I- I… oh God, I know you won’t forgive me for this.” You cried in her arms. “I made myself a sex slave for the girls.” You escaped from her embrace, kneeling with your hands covering your face in disgrace and fear.

Mina felt like her heart just crumpled and eardrums burst at what she had heard. Her eyes twitched and swell before it became watery from the overflowing emotions dealt by pain. The arms that was formed to wrap you in her console started to give up and fell back to her sides.

“Y-you… you did what?” Mina asked as she stared at nothingness. The sunset shining in her eyes in contrast to the building darkness of disgust around her.

“I had sex with your co-members, for a deal to keep our relationship going.” You elaborated. “Because if I don’t, they’ll threaten me to be banned from ever seeing you and the rest of them ever again.”

Mina’s fists clenched in anger. The tears flowing in her cheeks were like disappearing instantly at how hot she’s getting driven by her fury. She seethes it in, while still processing the fact that the people she once thought are her friends and would support her sincerely, would be the cause of the downfall of one of the most important things she cherishes in life through betrayal.

She wasn’t in a good condition to think properly, so her body rather took in charge on controlling what the right thing to do for now. Mina left you in the balcony and grabbed her shoulder bag from her room. You stand up and followed her.

“W-wait, where are you going?”

Mina didn’t answer.

“Wait, please Mina. Let me explain more-”

“DON’T FUCKING TALK TO ME, YN. J-just… don’t. I want to be left alone I-I just can’t stand seeing every one of you for now.” Mina daringly pointed her finger at you, staring right through your soul.

The main door suddenly clicked. It opened, Mina walked through it and saw the rest of the girls who came back from grocery. Momo was in the front, blocking the way.

She was about to greet Mina with large smile on her face when she got startled from the brutal slap she received straight on her face. The girls exclaimed in shock, and Mina stared at them venomously.

“Traitors.” She muttered before taking a turn as she began walking away from them.

All of the girls watched you just helplessly standing in the middle of the room. They understood what this is all mean now. Mina has found out the truth.

SET 5

Some of them were about to chase Mina but she already entered an elevator and it closed.

The rest of them went in silent to deal with the consequences of their actions.

The entire group has no idea of Mina’s whereabouts. They talked to few people they knew that are friends with Mina from outside and nobody have seen nor met them after the incident. They wanted to believe, but they are confident that one of them must be lying as per Mina’s request to leave her alone.

they multiplied her pain than the first time her health succumbed from.

If that was probably what Mina wants from now, they can give it to her, but they won’t be put to rest thinking about how she might be dealing the darkest truth she had discovered.

Almost a decade of being with Mina, they know she’s one of the most vulnerable, and that woke them up to the harsh reality that they not just only hurt their friend for the first time….

The thought of setting Mina into another hiatus term because of their fault made them regretting a lot that they have put their guards down from getting obssessed over nothing but lust from you. Not only that, the guilt you’re having were now being carried by them as well, that’s why they couldn’t blame you as her boyfriend to be this depressed right now.

You and the girls were trapped in the dark, deafening silence and heavy baggage of self-blame. They still tried to be productive as an idol despite of the current situation, while you in whole opposite side, has to see you almost unmoved, looking at the unknown filled with somber hopes to hear your phone receive a notification atleast or ring after hundreds of missed call you have attempted.

It all stopped when almost 2 weeks later, Mina made a return to the dorm. You were in your house when it happened, and so Jihyo immediately contacted you to inform that she’s here. Driving in rush, you arrived at their dorm in no time.

As you stepped in front of the door and opened it, you were met by everyone except Jihyo, Jeongyeon, and Nayeon bowing their heads. You were perplexed when some of them like Dahyun and Tzuyu are crying too. “W-what happened? Where is she?”

“Y-YN… please stop unnie.” Dahyun spoke in ragged tone.

“Why? From what?”

The other missing members appeared from the other hallway, and there was girlfriend carrying a bag and luggages. Your eyes widened when the three are following her from behind as if they’re begging.

Mina met you in her way and you just stood there wondering why she all have her belongings out. It scares you to ask, but you have to find out. “Mina, w-where are you going?”

“I’m not staying on this dorm anymore. I’m also leaving TWICE.”

Your jaw dropped.

“And I’m breaking up with you.”

You watched Mina’s stoic expression in devastation. Your heart felt like it exploded into pieces hearing the words you never wanted to happen together with her. Yet here she was, standing at you in her broken state, managed to announce that without any hesitation.

“No, Mina. Please, can you hear me for a second? Let’s just talk.”

“Get out of my way, YN.”

“I’m not letting you. Just, please think about this first!”

“I MADE UP MY MIND!!!” Mina screamed, and it sent shivers to the girls knowing she rarely raises her voice. “IF YOU AND… THESE SO-CALLED FRIENDS OF MINE NEVER ARRANGED TO STAB ME IN BACK, THIS WOULD’VE NOT HAPPEN IN THE FIRST PLACE!”

“Mina, YN owes you an explanation. So do us, as well.”

“Don’t you dare lecture me this time, Jihyo.” She turned around at Jihyo and confronted her with burning rage in her eyes.

“I’m not lecturing you, Mina. I’m just trying to make you understand.”

“What is it that I have to understand?!” Mina confusedly asked. “Other than all of you fucking my boyfriend behind my back, taking advantage of my blindness? Y-you guys are sick!”

“Because I did it all for YOU!” You yelled as you you couldn’t hold it in much longer. The desperation of her to be prevented from ending all of this for good. “I had no choice but to accept it because they blackmailed me, Mina. They dared me that if I didn’t follow what they want from me, they won’t delete that video and they can prohibit me from getting any access to all of you!”

“W-what video?” Mina puzzledly asked.

“We got caught… having sex in the resort.” You revealed. “And they used that to give them something in exchange not to trigger them doing something about us.”

“Who recorded us?”

“I did.” Momo stood from the couch, bravely taking accountability for what she did. “I was also the one who proposed a plan to have YN for ourselves.”

“H-how could you?” Mina was about to break down, her breath shaking.

“I wasn’t thinking properly at that time. Neither were them. We got clouded by lust and the need to sample YN. How attractive he looks, we were manipulated to do some dirty deeds on him. And realizing what we have truly done, we’ve made a terrible mistake, Mina.” Momo explained.

“And you all never thought about how it would break my heart so bad that I just wanted to end it all?” Mina started crying. “I just couldn’t live with the darkest truth that my boyfriend and my friends are cheating on me, and that’s my first relationship tainted with sin because of all of you!”

“Mina, we swear, we thought about the consequences at first.” Nayeon joined the discussion. “We are aware that you already have YN by yourself, romantically to say the least. That’s why… I don’t know, a stupid idea was formulated by Momo here to rather claim YN by ourselves only for his body. And we admit, we are just craving for his affection that it broke our limit to accept.”

“Enough with the crap we’re trying to justify of, if there’s anyone you should blame a lot, it’s us. not YN. He had no choice, he was threatened.” Jeongyeon said. “And you may not forgive us anymore for this, but we just want to say that we’re really sorry.”

“You’re right, I’ll never forgive any of you for this.” Mina glared at anyone. “And I don’t buy any of your apology, once a cheater will always be a cheater, like they say. Who knows, all of you may done it again.”

“I swear, Mina. I never wanted any of it, I could’ve stopped if I want to, but they won’t let me be!” You said. “If you know how it eats me alive everytime I finish doing it with them knowing that I’m still in a relationship with you. I never wanted to do it, but I still did it because I need you to stay.” She watched you sobbing in plead.

“It scares me both as a fan and as your lover that everything we had has to stop if I didn’t follow them. I can’t lose you, Mina. I’m willing to do everything even if it ruins my reputation, lose my dignity, or cost my life, because I love you.”

Mina cried at your last statement. The mask she was wearing since she arrived is now starting to drop. You kneeled in front of her and hugged her thighs.

“Please, don’t go.”

Mina looked at your pitiful state and roamed her sight at the girls watching this dramatic scene in person. “Look at what you have all done.” She gritted her teeth.

“Let me guess, if I didn’t asked him about this, you guys would still do it without my knowledge, huh?” She bitterly chuckle regarding about the absurdity of their reasoning. They just all bowed in shame, knowing that Mina got them defeated with that single sentence.

“I also didn’t want to leave the group, nor break up with YN.” You looked up in surprise to see her wiping her tears. “Funny, right? Despite the unbearable amount of pain you have inflicted on me, I just can’t seem to avoid this stage of life that I reached with all of you.”

“A part of me still wanted to atleast stay. No because being an idol is my passion or my love for YN. It’s because I can’t lose all of you. That’s how special you guys are to me.” They all cried after hearing how touching it was even if they knew they don’t deserve Mina’s kind-heartedness anymore.

“As what I’ve said, this won’t stop unless I had to find out. I guess, there’s still a way to fix all of these. And since I’m already involved at whatever this is, it has to remain like that from now on.”

“What are you trying to imply, Mina?”

“You girls said that you have no found feelings for him, right? Only for pleasure?”

“Definitely just friends with benefits, that’s all.” Sana said.

“Then, let’s make a new deal. This thing you have with him, I’ll allow it to continue.”

All of them gasp in shock, with a mix of utter confusion. “Wait, Mina are you serious?”

“Don’t give me that reaction, I know you girls must’ve been disappointed that you can’t fuck him anymore because I already know the truth.” Mina retorted. “If this is what would keep us together, then this should stay only with us. No more intentions of damaging or kicking out anybody else in our lives too.” She referred to Momo who got what she’s trying to point about.

“You girls can continue being friends with benefits with him, but it would be under my control this time. I have to be updated all the time at what you guys did, maybe I could learn new things to pleasure my boyfriend here atleast.” She patted your head.

“I also will keep our relationship with YN, and that’s what should always matter here. Know your boundaries because if you don’t, I won’t hesitate to take actions about it that you’ll never like.” Mina warned them all.

“These only have to stop if me and YN decided to get marry in the future. For the sake of respect to the family we’re going to build. Or even if some of you began to find somebody to love as well. Are we all clear?”

“We’ll do everything to redeem ourselves, Mina. If that what you wish for, we’ll do it.” Momo agreed.

“Just don’t keep any secrets on me.” Mina then looked at your kneeling posture below her. She threw her bag away and pushed the luggages away. “Get up, I won’t go now. But… I still have one more thing to do to ease off my mind.”

“What is it?”

Mina began unbuttoning her blouse one by one, exposing her lace-cladded black bra encasing her luscious small tits. The rest of the girls were stunned also as they witness Mina going bare-naked in front of you. Throwing the piece of clothing aside, she then moved through her skirt, unzipped and dragged them down to the ground.

You gawked at the incredible view of Mina in her favorite set of black lingerie partnered by enticing suspenders that holds her thigh-high stockings. She pushed you to the wall and cornered you there. Tilting her head aside, she glanced at the other members who couldn’t do anything but to anticipate what’s about to occur afterwards.

“I’m going to punish you all for what you did to me. That means I’m going to discipline this pathetic little boy while all of you only get to watch me empty his balls and make him submit and ravage me under my commands. Understood?”

They all nodded with an unspoken dismay present in their face, but Mina doesn’t give a single damn about it. She then went down on her knees, take off your pants and boxers, and wield the already erect beautiful piece of meat in her dainty hands.

You watched all the girls occupy the carpet and the couch, removing their lower garment to let their pussies free from the lingering sensation that Mina has given effect of her sudden persona transformation. They made their fingers go to work, groping their tits and inserting their digits in each to their sopping wet slit.

“Good luck, YN. You’re in the hands of Sharon now.” Jeongyeon concerningly reminded you.

You matched Mina’s sharp gaze and devilish gaze. She began pumping your cock with her fist close to her lewd face. You inhaled and braced yourself at the immense pleasure she’s given you already.

“You better keep up with me, boy. I won’t go easy on you today.”

Pre-cum escaped from your tip, Mina blew her warm breath at your pinkish head. She cackled as she watched you tremble. Lifting your cock, she gave a long lick from your full balls then the underside and up to your plump end.

“Shall we start?”

==OO==

[yawnderu]

Lamb of God — Nikto x Medic!Reader | Part I

Shot, stabbed, beaten... Mikhail has been through hell countless times, yet no amount of training or experience from years in Spetsnaz could ever prepare him for what Victor Zakhaev did to him. 8 missing nails, multiple new wounds on his already scarred body, and a face so disfigured he could no longer recognize himself— not only was his body broken, but so was his psyche.

His first visit was with the medics, wounds in desperate need of cleaning even with infection starting to set in most of them, the chemical burns on his face already blistering and itching despite being scolded by the medic multiple times for scratching himself. He was a difficult patient to say the least— not wanting anyone to touch his injuries or even look at him, only accepting treatment from the only person who dared confront him.

“'Stop that.” Your request comes in a sharp tone, not wanting him to itch his blistering injuries and make the scarring worse than what you knew it would be. A mumbled ''don't tell me what to do'' makes its way to your ears, though you decide to ignore it when he puts his hands way, adhesive bandages decorating his fingers where the nails had been ripped off.

“Sit up for me.” The man is an aggressive dog that defends himself with fangs bared, yet he somehow listens to your commands— even when he scoffs or grumbles before finally doing what you ask. Your gloved hand goes to his chin as you examine the red skin on his face, noting it was washed when he was first rescued, no residue of the acid left. He mumbles something and you raise an eyebrow, waiting for him to repeat himself.

“Is it gross?” His deep voice asks, accent even rougher with the raw emotion he's feeling. He knows for a fact it's gross, he saw it himself— he has blisters covering over half of his face, still remembering the acid dripping down his face from Zakhaev simply wanting to cause him pain.

“I've seen worse— at least you still have a face.” Being a medic for the military allowed you to see both human cruelty, and the extends injuries could go. You've seen multiple soldiers missing their face, skin pulled and bones poking out of their bodies— Mikhail's injuries aren't the worst you've seen, not even close.

“Your nose doesn't look too weird either, even when I was told it was broken. Your eyes still work, all your limbs are still attached... you'll recover from everything in no time.” You try to keep a positive attitude despite the way his baby blue eyes are staring holes into your head, pupils looking tiny despite the dim light in the room.

“I'm mostly worried about what's going on here.” You tap his head softly and he doesn't take long on pushing your hand away softly, a small smile making way to your lips when you notice how he avoids eye contact for a second before he's back to staring at you. You stare back for a while, trying to decipher what he's feeling before going to grab a cloth, filling a small bucket with cold water and making your way back to him.

“This might hurt a little bit, let me know if you want me to stop and we can take a break.” He looks down at the bucket of water and the cloth you're dipping in, squeezing the excess water as you wait for his approval. He gives you a nod in affirmation, flinching slightly as the cold cloth makes contact with his face. It doesn't hurt as much as he imagined— if anything, it feels almost soothing, the previous ache and itchiness disappearing even if only for a very short while.

“Заканчивай быстрее с этой хернëй.” He mutters under his breath despite how good it actually feels on his injuries, not wanting to get any pity from you.

“Be patient.” It almost feels like he's getting scolded by his nana, faint memories of the old woman cleaning his scrapped knees come to mind, holding onto them to try and stop the bad thoughts from flooding his damaged brain.

“Mikhail.” Your soft voice slowly brings him back to reality, feeling an odd sensation all over his face. His hand goes up to feel his cheeks, only now realizing that you already dressed his wounds. He looks utterly confused, not even remembering you getting gauze, everything happening too suddenly. Now that he thinks about it, he doesn't remember most of the heli flight back home, too busy thinking about... what was he even thinking about?

“Mikhail.” You repeat, one of your gloved hands going to his shoulder in attempts to make him look at you. He's still staring blankly at the floor, just as he has been doing for the past 20 minutes, not responding to his own name.

“Quiet, I hear enough voices.” He brushes you off, finally getting up from the medical bed and quickly leaving your office despite the small limp from the beatings he took for days.

He hears voices? His next stop will have to be with the provided psychiatrist once his body recovers a little bit to test if he's still fit to be part of Spetsnaz, leaving your heart filled with worry until you move onto the next patient, making a mental note to check on him later.

A/N: Mikhail is Nikto's name in this fic, the person he used to be before turning into Никто.

[live-laugh-lenney]

Hey, sorry if you aren't comfy with writing this/me requesting it but I just want to know if you could do a period comfort type thing with Arthur or Will? On my period rn and my lord it is killing me :/

the girlies are hungry for some willne content so here we go!

she had a feeling.

a horrid feeling that sat low in her stomach, along with the cramps that were contracting her muscles and the damp sensation that she could feel between her thighs, and she couldn't bring herself to leave the warmth and the comfort of the bed to see a bloodied stain left in her place on will's bed because she hadn't been paying attention to what time of the month it was. and she so badly wanted to get up, to check, to make sure she hadn't leaked too much, if at all, on his bed sheets... yet she found herself panicking.

this was the first time she'd started her period in the presence of him.

usually, she would busy her life to the point where they'd go almost a week without seeing each other because her hormones made her feel gross and grumpy and hormonal. and will wasn't stupid and yn, deep down, knew that... but he never went digging and he never forced plans to happen during that one particular week each month. if she knew she was due to start then there was no way she'd have agreed to stay at his place for the weekend.

"if you stare up at the ceiling any longer, the upstairs owner will be in bed with us."

"what?"

her features scrunch up with her eyebrows pinching together on her browline and she turns her head to look in his direction, being met with a cheeky smirk on his lips and a pair of tired eyes watching her, and she could feel her cheeks heating up with embarrassment.

"you'll burn a hole in the ceiling if you stare at it any longer," he says in amusement and she rolls her eyes, "what did it ever do to you?"

"nothing," she grumbles, grasping at his duvet and pulling it up to cover her face, "i'm going back to sleep."

there's a moment where neither of them move... until she feels him tug on the comforter to remove it from her face, only to be met with a tight grip and a straight-up refusal on her part. and he wasn't in the mood to back down, ducking beneath the covers and coming face-to-face with her.

"something's bothering you," he says softly, almost like a whisper, and he can see the emotions written across her face, "what's the matter?"

"nothing," she whines and turns her face away from him, squeezing her eyes tightly and he sighs heavily, dropping his face into the swell of her breasts that were dressed with one of his old t-shirts, "i'm just sleepy. guess i struggled to sleep last night."

"come on," he scoffs and buries his face a little more into her breast, "i know you, yn. i'm not an idiot."

there's a wave of silence and she really contemplates whether she wanted to tell him or not... it was silly for her to be embarrassed over something as natural as a period but she felt silly for getting so upset and panicky over it. it wasn't something she could control.

"you're gonna be grossed out."

"nonsense," he lifts his head and looks at her, "i'm up in your morning breath right now, nothing can be worse than that."

she scoffs and lifts an arm to whack into his shoulder, making strong contact, enough to elicit a groan from him.

"i hate you," she grumbles and he cackles softly, cosying down beside her and laying an arm across her stomach - unknowing to him that she found instant comfort in feeling his warmth and the weight of his arm resting just where her cramps were aching, "seriously, it's gross."

"what is it? i can't help if you don't tell me."

she pouts her lips out and she wants the ground to swallow her whole because this wasn't a conversation she was prepared for.

"i think i've started my period," she murmurs quietly and she's timid when she looks him in the eye, "but i have none of my stuff. no pads, no tampons, i have no paracetamol or clean pants or anything. and i think i've leaked on your sheets and-"

"is this all you were worried about?"

she gulps thickly and he smiles softly.

"oh, you're a silly goose," he shakes his head, "you think i'm not at all prepared for this?"

"prepared?"

"the only thing i don't have for you is clean pants," he admits and he removes the covers from where they were almost suffocating the two of them, "i have everything you need in the cupboard under the sink in the bathroom. tampons, pads, everything you need. as for the bed sheets, we can wash them, no worries about that."

"you-"

"you think i don't know?" he lifts an arm up and brings a hand to cup her cheek, brushing his thumb across her cheek in a soothing way, "i know when you pretend to be busy for a week so you don't have to see me. i know you keep yourself occupied so you can't come over," her cheeks pink up and, yeah, she feels a lot sillier now, "sunshine, i've been with you for over six months now. i'm not an idiot."

"i can't believe you," she giggles sweetly and she stretches her neck to press a kiss to his cheek, "i love you."

"i love you too," he grins, "now, go and freshen up. have a shower, do what you need to do, and i'll pop out and grab us some breakfast."

"can you get some croissants and pancakes?" she wonders and he nods, "maybe some fruit? and some bacon."

"i'll see what i can do," he presses a kiss to her forehead before he swings his legs over the edge of the bed and stands to his feet, "take as long as you want, yeah? i'll some clean clothes for you on the bed for when you get out."

"thank you," she smiles, watching as he dug through his wardrobe for a fresh outfit to wear for the morning, "now hurry up, otherwise i'm going to turn into some hormonal monster. and you won't like that."

"yes, ma'am." xx

[miyukiachi]

ONLY FANS🔞

Bada Lee on strap

Fem reader

Smut au

Jihye's POV

It's been a year since I started an OnlyFans account. Some people may say I'm selling my body for money, but who cares? It's money, after all. I just recorded a simple dance video as an invitation for my viewers because I'm currently looking for a partner on a project proposed by a viewer. I posted the video on my twitter to attract more viewers.

Not even a minute after I uploaded the video, my notification popped like crazy. I scrolled down to see all the replies, but I noticed a very familiar name. "Hmm, @deepinurocean." I know this username is familiar, so I decided to hit his DM. I chose him.

I turned my phone off and prepared my best lingerie. “Red or Black?” I thought to myself. This is one of my biggest clients so far, and I hope my partner won't disappoint. I was getting ready when I received a message from him, saying that he was near the area. So just for fun, I started filming to see his genuine reaction.

Not longer than a minute after I started recording, I heard footsteps that were followed by a knock. "Come in, I've been waiting for you" I seductively said. He opened the door, and to my surprise, SHE is definitely not a HE.

She is wearing black leather pants paired with a black leather jacket. She also has a helmet in her hand, which makes me think she rode a motorcycle to get here. Her hair is long and black with blonde highlights. And her smell—how do I even begin describing her fucking smell? Maybe I'll just say her scent turned on the hell out of me.

"Damn." she coldly said, but with spice in her voice. That voice made me feel even hotter. Her voice definitely sent shivers down my spine and made my in between warm. Fuck, I’m wet already? Without a doubt, I’ve pull her jacket so she could be closer to me. “I've been waiting for you." She was about to lean in for a kiss. I gave her the lightest peck on the lips, down to her neck, and up to her ear. I saw the longing in her eyes. She leaned in for another kiss but I immediately stopped her by putting my finger infront of her mouth. "You'll earn that later. Mind helping me tear this beautiful lingerie?" I said.

I somehow triggered her wild side she's been keeping the moment she saw me. She slowly took off the top part of this lingerie but tore the bottom. "We won't be needing this" she said, then smirked before groping my pussy. I held onto her shoulders for support and stared deep into her eyes. "This won't be the only thing that is wet after tonight..." She said as she plays with my folds, making me more wet. She circled her thumb on my clit and I made little to no movement while staring at her. The moment she slowly inserted her two fingers in me, she said “Baby, I know you'll be begging for more" I grasped as I felt her long and soft fingers inside me.

She started going slow. “Fuck, baby. Please” which made her go faster than her current speed. Her thrusting made me moan softly. I can't help but close my eyes in pleasure. "Fuck, baby! More!" I said and I felt another finger inside me. “Keep looking at me.” She said in an authorative, hoarse voice. Damn, this woman is stretching me more than any other cock ever did.

We just started, but I felt that I'm almost at my climax. "Keep going, I think I'm almost cumming" I said, panting. After that phrase, she stopped and looked at me. "I hope this'll earn a kiss from you." She unzipped her pants and let out a strap-on tied to her. My mouth immediately formed an “oh” but no voice came out of it. I got a good look at her body, and her fucking V-line is making me want to scream for more, beg for more, want her more. I swear, this girl will probably be the death of me.

"We'll see," I said. She guided me into a doggy position. "Let me take a good look at that ass." she said. "It looks even fuller than on screen" she added, then slapped the shit out of me. "Ugh! Fucking hell!" I screamed in pain and pleasure.

She teased my clit by rubbing the tip of the toy. "Fuck me now, please" I begged. "I like hearing you begging" she replied and she inserted the tip in the entrance of my pussy. "Do it again," she added. I sighed before saying, "Please?” I said, crying. I want her in me already. “Please, what beautiful?” I can feel the tip rubbing my clit and up to my folds. “fuck me, fuck me now" I plead. Oh god, my eyes almost turned all white when I felt her toy inside me, reaching the deepest part of me.

She keeps on thrusting at me while slapping my bum every now and then. "That's right, babe. Ride me like a good girl" she said when we changed into a cowgirl position. I know I'm about to come, so I looked at her straight in the eyes. "I-I'm cumming" I said. "You can't decide on that" she replied, which makes me want to explode. I moved my head closer to her and gave her a passionate kiss. "Please, I'm cumming" I begged her as I stopped myself from bursting down there. She removed the toy which made me want to protest but I was stopped when she replaced it with her fingers. Fuck. I like this better than any dick. "Don’t close your eyes, look at me while you cum for me, darling" she said as I felt my release and satisfaction.

I turned off the camera and wore an oversize shirt to cover myself up. "I'm Jihye" I said. "Bada..." she replied. What a nice name. "It was nice fucking you" she smirked, then pecked my lips

[lilbardrhi]

"Broken", Not Stupid - 20: Contacts

Pairing: alpha!Simon "Ghost" Riley x unusual omega!OC (13)

CW: Omegaverse; dehumanization; physical, mental, and emotional abuse committed by an organization; unethical experimentation on humans; cult behavior; very inaccurate description & time of someone dismantling a phone to check for bombs and things

Author's Note: I did some writing sprinting (shoutout to the Discord bot!)... I forgot how much sprinting helps me write x'D but ayyy~ a longer part! Closer to my regular sized content! Anywho~ enjoy uwu

By the beginning of the second week living with Simon, I feel more rested than ever... but I'm still restless. I'm officially on his insurance, have a doctor's appointment scheduled, and I have a "phone" now.

"What the fuck is this?" I ask, holding up the... phone... between my index finger and thumb.

"It's a cell phone, 13," Johnny laughs, "not a bomb."

Everyone goes quiet and Simon swipes the phone from my hands, passing it to Johnny.

"Check it. Quickly."

Johnny begins dismantling the phone before my eyes and manages to put it back together all in under five minutes.

"Took longer than usual," Simon mumbles and takes the phone back when Johnny hands it to him.

"I was being thorough. I refuse to be the one in trouble if your girl gets- nevermind," the Scotsman cuts himself off with a shake of his head.

Simon's girl... interesting thought, the omega in my head almost squeals. I make a face in response and the two men give me a confused look.

"Nothing," I shake my head then point to the phone. "So what is that really?"

The two give each other a look before Simon speaks.

"You've never seen a smart phone. Have you ever seen a cell phone at all?"

Even with him sitting a bit further away, I can smell his irritation at the thought.

"I have seen a cell phone, thank you very much. It was my father's - a flip phone," I inform them with a scoff. "This is not a phone."

I hold the "phone" up again, holding it properly this time as I shove it towards them.

"Holy fuck, Ghost," Johnny mumbles then grunts in pain. I just barely catch Simon's foot moving away from Johnny's shin. "Simon, what-"

"Not now," Simon forces thorugh gritted teeth. "I'll teach you how to use it." He holds out his hand for the phone then motions me closer. "And help you set it up."

Around an hour later, I have a functioning smart phone. Simon is adding important contacts to it while Johnny and I make some tea.

"So he got you drinking tea, huh?" Johnny asks with a smile.

"With a shit ton of honey, yeah," I chuckle and stir my now-ready herbal tea. "And very few flavors so far. Mostly fruity ones," I add with a shrug.

We go comfortably quiet for a moment as we prepare everybody's tea as they prefer it.

"How are you feeling?" he asks in a gentle voice.

"I may be a broken thing, Johnny, but I am not fragile," I chuckle with a sad smile while staring into my tea. "I'm fine."

"No more nightmares?"

"More?" I ask, looking at him with a raised eyebrow.

"Simon said the night we tried to get your story you ended up waking up screaming some time in the middle of the night. We hadn't had much in the way of updates since, so I wanted to check in myself," Johnny shrugs.

"Y'all have a group chat, don't you?" I ask with a smirk. "What all has been discussed about me so far?"

"It's nothin' bad, lass!" Johnny quickly defends the group. "We just... we worry about ya. Knowin' that there's somethin' wrong goin' on with Salvation, we just wanna know that you're ok. And Simon sucks at regular updates so we- I... bug sometimes. Roach does too."

"Wait, wait... who all is in this group chat? And who is Roach?"

Johnny's wide smile returns.

"You'll be in the group soon enough, I would think. Simon's adding everyone in it to your contacts and he said he'll be adding you to the big group chat for quicker communications," he tells me excitedly.

"Ok," I say slowly, "So who are all of these people I'll be in contact with? I assume the four of you that I've met, but who else?"

"Well, Roach for one. He was part of our original team for a while, but had to go into the reserves. Jeanz," a slightly goofy smile makes an appearance on Johnny's face before he continues, "we've mentioned her before. Simon thinks it'll be good for you - and him - if you've got more than testosterone around ya," he laughs. "Jeanz is good people, though. I'm sure you two will get along just fine."

"Alright... anybody else?" I push, a bit nervous about the list so far.

"Gaz's missus, Price's too. They like to keep track of the civilian shenanigans - we're all a pretty tight-knit group, but easy-going," he offers with a warm smile. "Don't worry about a thing. We all already adore ya, from what we do know about ya. You're practically family already."

"I'll take your word for it," I mutter and pick up mine and Simon's tea to deliver his to the living room.

Johnny was right. By time he left, I was already chatting in the group chat. As best as I could, at least, with learning that the buttons on phones are all on the side and all typing is done at the touch of the screen.

"Simon, I'm exhausted. Are they going to be offended it- Oh."

Before I could finish my question, my phone dinged with a group chat notification. He'd sent them a message saying I'd be passing out sitting up on the couch if he didn't get me away from the phone.

"Thanks," I give him a small, but thankful, smile. "They all seem great. I'm excited to meet everyone this weekend, I'm just..."

I trail off with a yawn and stand to stretch. The stretch makes me lightheaded and Selene chose that moment to weave in-between my legs so I end up falling towards the coffee table. Simon's arm darts out, wrapping around my stomach, to stop me mid-fall.

"Please be more careful," he requests as he helps me stand back up.

"Thanks," I mutter and give a half-hearted glare to Selene who is now on the couch grooming herself.

As I make my way down the hall, I consider something for a moment.

Maybe... I could sleep in his room again. I hadn't slept that well in a while and- no. That is not happening. Absoultely not.

What the hell am I thinking? Damn omega in my head took over for a moment there...

With a simple "goodnight", I make my way to my bed and curl up in my own space for a peaceful, restful night's sleep.

Masterlist | CoD Masterlist | Part One

Tag List: @lucienofthelakes @lostintransist @demothers-empty-blog @scaredyspooks @tessakate @one-really-annoying-tree-rat @nerdyphantomtheorist @gazsluckyhat @peanutismynickname @jeanzoriley-cod @avgdestitute @itsvargen

[pinkrangermemes]

EPIC, THE MUSICAL: ITHACA SAGA

sobs, what a wild ride this was. feel free to change pronouns and such when applicable.

"I'm supposed to choose a suitor to wear the crown."

"I said I would choose as soon as I weave this shroud."

"I'd rather lie than allow them to think they've won."

"I don't know how much longer I'll last since we saw that storm."

"Could it be some kind of sign that my world is all about to change?"

"Is it finally time for the challenge I arranged?"

"Though I never thought that it would come to this, just know I'll be here, buying you time."

"Time is fleeting, it's running out."

"Time to be the man of the house."

"Whoever can string _____'s old bow and shoot through twelve axes cleanly will be the new _____."

"Let the arrow fly once you know your aim is true."

"Though I never thought that these would be the lengths we go for love, I would not have it any other way."

"Where is the man who can string this bow?"

"Screw this competition, we've been here for hours."

"Screw this damn challenge, no more delays."

"Can't you guys see we're being played?"

"This is how they hold us down while the throne gets colder."

"Where in the hell is our pride and our rage?"

"Here and now, there's a chance for action."

"Here and now, we can take control."

"Channel the fire inside of your soul."

"Haven't you noticed who's missing?"

"Don't you know the prince is not around?"

"Hold him down while I slit his throat."

"Hold him down while I break his pride, his trust, his faith and his bones."

"When the crown wonders where the prince is, only the ocean and I will know."

"For twenty years I've suffered every punishment and pain from the wrath of gods and monsters to the screams of comrades slain."

"Worst of all, I hear you dare to touch my wife and hurt my boy."

"I. Have had. Enough."

"In the heat of battle, at the edge of the unknown, somewhere in the shadows lurks an agile, deadly foe."

"You don't understand it, this man plans for every fight."

"Where is he? Where is he!"

"Keep your head down!"

"He's using the darkness to hide his approaches!"

"We're empty handed, up against an archer, our only chance is to strike him in the darkness."

"We know these halls, the odds can be tilted!"

"You don't think I know my own palace? I built it."

"Old king, our leader is dead! You've destroyed the serpent's head, now the rest of us are no longer a threat."

"Old king, forgive us instead, so that no more blood is shed."

"Let's have open arms instead."

"No."

"Damn, he's more cunning than I assumed."

"I find it hard to believe that the sharpest of kings left his armory unlocked."

"Now that we have armed ourselves, let's make the bastard rot."

"Behind you!"

"Throw down those weapons and I ensure you'll be spared."

"I don't want to hurt you but, believe me, I've come prepared."

"We don't fight fair."

"Capture him, he's our greatest chance!"

"Get off me!"

"Fight til the prince can barely stand!"

"Make the king obey our command, 'cause if he won't I'll break the kid's hands."

"Mercy? Mercy?"

"My mercy has long since drowned."

"As long as you're around, my family's fate remains unknown."

"You plotted to kill my _____."

"All of you are going to die!"

"You filled my heart with hate."

"All my life, I've died to meet you, thought about your name so much it hurts."

"Now you're here, I can't find the words."

"All my life, I'd have died to know you."

"I can't help but wonder what your world must be."

"All this time I've wondered if you'd embrace me as your own."

"For twenty years, I've wandered, for so long I've felt alone."

"Oh, _____, look how much you've grown."

"Oh, _____, sweetest joy I've known."

"Used to say I'd make the storm clouds cry for you."

"Used to say I'd capture wind and sky for you."

"Held you in my arms, prepared to die for you, oh, how time has flown."

"I can only wonder what your world has been."

"All I've ever wanted was to reunite with my own."

"Twenty years, we've wandered, but today you're not alone."

"_____, I'm finally home!"

"You were never one for hellos."

"I can't help but wonder what this world could be if we all held each other with a bit more empathy."

"I can't help but feel like I led you astray."

"What if there's a world where we don't have to live this way?"

"If that world exists, it's far away from here."

"It's one I'll have to miss, for it's far beyond my years."

"Is it you? Have my prayers been answered?"

"Is it really you standing there, or am I dreaming once more?"

"Your eyes look tired. Your frame is lighter, your smile torn."

"I am not the _____ you fell in love with."

"I am not your kind and gentle _____."

"Would you fall in love with me again if you knew all I've done?"

"I know that you've been waiting, waiting for love."

"Left a trail of red on every island as I traded friends like objects I could use."

"Hurt more lives than I can count on my hands."

"If that's true, could you do me a favor?

"See that wedding bed? Could you carry it over?"

"How could you say this?"

"I had built that wedding bed with my blood and sweat, carved it into the olive tree where we first met."

"A symbol of our love ever lasting, do you realize what you have asked me?"

"The only way to move it is to cut it from its roots!"

"Only my _____ knew that, so I guess that makes _____ you!"

"I will fall in love with you over and over again."

"I don't care how, where, or when, no matter how long it's been you're mine!"

"Don't tell me you're not the same person."

"I love you."

[wannaeatramyeon]

Hi~ can I request "committed relationship with lookism boys" headcannons (such as samuel, jake, gun, eli)? Sorry if it's too much and thank you in advance! 💙

Hi anon, thanks for the ask and sorry for the delay! Of course you can but how dare you leave off our Goofy and also Viiiin. I've got quite a few hc floating around (latest one here for almost everyone). Let's do committed committed though.

Do I have to mention that I hc most of the Lookism guys as romantics in their own way?

Lookism Boys in committed relationships (longer term etc.)

The usual - Sammy, Jake, Gun, Eli, Goo, Vin

Samuel Seo

Being in a committed relationship, or really a relationship at all isn't something he has thought much about but with the right person it can work.

He wants the whole thing - engagement, marriage, kids.

Proposal would be something more traditional and romantic than you would expect.

Likely booking out the fanciest restaurant, enjoying a candlelit dinner followed shortly with Sammy down on one knee with a diamond ring the size of your fist.

Honestly, everything would be a little bit of a spectacle. Used as much to express his love to you as well as his power and status so it's not going to be quiet or chill.

Wants someone that will stay by his side and wants all the formalities to go with it.

The piece of paper saying you're legally married, in sickness and in health, for better or worse would mean a lot to him, though he would never express it.

As always with this guy, fingers crossed he's had a buttload of therapy especially before any kids come along.

Jake Kim

Hmm, let's leave anything longer term until after he retires from Big Deal.

Obviously a romantic, though he does not want a repeat of his dad, where he leaves you at home and he's off gallivanting doing gangster shit.

It goes without saying but to clarify: Jake is a one woman man. If he's in a relationship with you, nothing will ever make him turn his head.

Like Sammy, wants to experience everything with you by his side. The marriage, the kids, the growing old together.

As the head of Big Deal though, he knows that he would not be able to give you the attention you deserve.

Doesn't ask you to wait for him, he could never get in the way of your happiness though he desperately wishes that you would.

And of course you do, it's Jake!

Meeting his mother, that force of a woman, wife of Gapryong Kim, might be the most intimidating experience of your life. You leave in awe and a little in love with her yourself.

Gun Park

Actually did think marriage would be on the cards, although one of convenience rather than love.

(It would come as a very pleasant and welcome surprise that his life turns out that way.)

If it was an arranged/convenient marriage then you'll barely see him tbh. And he would expect an open marriage.

If Gun loves you, then this guy is traditional as hell in a committed relationship, and a romantic too.

Will get you a gifts sent to your work, bouquet of roses, or just buy you something because it reminds him of you. Remembers anniversaries and make sure there is something special prepared.

That antique necklace you said you liked in passing? It's on your pillow the next day. That place you said you wanted to see? You're going that weekend.

Yes to engagement, yes to marriage, yes to kids.

The proposal would be something very specific and sentimental to you both. The wedding, less so. He has a lot of customs he would need to follow being head of the Yamazaki Clan and Gun being who he is.

With kids, doesn't matter what gender, Gun would mould them to be his masterpiece.

Eli Jang

Quite honestly didn't expect a long term or committed relationship to be on the cards. (He should really be focusing on Yenna instead of gallivanting around playing loan shark with 5A - ahem).

Most responsible parents would take a while before introducing you to their kid, but with Eli - has the vibe that oh shit something has come up with 5A and will dump Yenna on you.

What can I say, it's been obvious that this guy's logic and critical thinking isn't his strong point.

Doesn't really care for all the formalities of long term relationships, the expectation of marriage but isn't opposed to it. Besides, it would be good to have the extra bit of added stability for Yenna.

Would have a small intimate wedding with just the nearest and dearest.

Likely to also get a couples tattoo too (have you seen the H on his FOREHEAD? That guy is BOLD.)

Can't imagine him actually wanting more kids, the first time round was traumatic enough.

However, if you really want more then he will consider it. Especially because it would be pretty cute for Yenna to be the older sis.

Goo Kim

Hard to get this guy to commit to you in the first place. He generally only has one thought: mind on his money and money on his mind.

Will be hard for this guy to admit his feelings for you, and whether he truly misses you or if it's just his clingy nature.

Once in a relationship, expect to be spoiled. What's the point of making all this if you can't enjoy it? And even though the gifts might not be to your taste (and in all honesty, pretty ostentatious), it's the thought that counts.

With long term plans, Goo is pretty easy-going and happy to go with the flow.

If you want to get married, just say the word. A little backyard wedding or hiring the most expensive wedding in Seoul - go for it.

Want a lil sparkle on your ring finger or none at all, also fine too.

Hint: best wedding present for him? Get him some swords.

Fence-sitter with kids, but if you want them then he can be swayed. Let's just enjoy more of our youth and our freedom first.

Vin Jin

Ahhh he's a secret cheeseball. Although maybe it's not so secret. He is SOFT for you, in his own standoffish way. Thinks he's cool about it but it's obvious to everyone.

Doesn't think too much long term and doesn't feel the need to get married. He's committed to you, he shows you, he tells you and feels that that's enough.

More likely for you guys to get hitched with a quickie wedding where you may or may not be drunk.

And then the morning after and nursing a hangover, Vin thinks huh. This is sorta nice.

You guys don't really do the engagement ring or wedding ring thing. There'll be something just as sentimental like a couples necklace.

Besides, who wouldn't be able to tell you're together with your constant couple outfits.

Kids? Ehh. Vin likes the idea of them but not the responsibility. If it'll happen, it'll happen.

[theseeingfawn]

Chapter 8: Secrets... Secrets...

Summary:

Azriel and Elain navigate the complexities of their growing relationship while desperately trying to keep it hidden from the Inner Circle.

Azriel Elain sprawls out before me. Her perfect body draped along my bike. Her plush thighs wrap around me as I fight to catch my breath. My eyes lock in on the rose tattoo under her breast, my cock weeping at the sight.

Say you're mine. I tell her, my voice choking from restraint. She has my mark, she’s all but mine. I just need to hear her say it.  Her eyes flutter at the request. That perfect rosy blush I love so much spreads across her cheeks and down her neck. I'm yours. 

I curse when the sound of a piercing alarm wakes me. It was a dream. Another fucking dream. But the throb in my slightly damp sleep shorts is very real. I reach down and stroke myself, finding my cock harder than it's ever been. I watch as my hand slides up and down providing me with much needed relief. I see the rose on my hand and I’m immediately back in my dream with Elain. I close my eyes, allowing the images of her bare before me to return. I'm so close, embarrassingly close. I stroke myself once, twice and I jerk at the force of my orgasm. My muscles tense as I shoot my release across my stomach. I lay there catching my breath, frustrated that I'm in this position yet again. It's been a week since my last date with Elain and I've woken up like this every single morning.

I've been keeping my distance from her until I get these feelings under control. I warned her my work would take me away for days at a time. She hasn't questioned it. Hasn't messaged me. Nothing. I don't know what I expect. The distance is what I want, no it's what I need but it's agony. I don't understand this chokehold she has on me. Everything about her drives me wild. She's an intoxicating mix of boldness and shyness. The way she quiets my thoughts. How she plays with me like no one else does.

I think about how she lured me into this secret arrangement. Stalking me like prey in the townhouse study. The way her hand slid down my chest as she taunted me. How she pretended she didn't know how to play darts just so I would touch her more.

Fuck, I'm hard again. I groan in frustration. I've never been this horny in my life. Maybe the solution is to give in to the feeling. I just have to work this need out of my system, I think as I start stroking myself all over again. I'll empty myself out as many times as it takes and then I'll decide what to do next. 

----------------------------------------------------------------

“You look like shit,” greets Cass.

I bite back a response and instead turn my attention to the movement in the corner of my eye. 

I watch Nesta as she slams her wrapped fists into a punching bag over and over again. The intense focus shining in her eyes like a burning flame. It's impressive though her form is shit. I can't imagine Cassian has been able to get her to work with him. 

“You'll last longer in a fight if you keep your elbows up.” I say as I walk over to her. I demonstrate by getting into a fighting stance. She nods at me and raises her arms higher. Instantly improving her form. Cassian gawks at me like I’ve performed some sort of miracle. 

“I've been telling her that all week but she won't listen.” 

“That's because you're a pain in the ass.” She responds without looking at him. “I'd rather train with Az.”

I turn and give him a smile. He scowls at me in return,“Why are you even here?” 

I narrow my eyes. “I'm here to work out, this is a gym, isn't it?” 

Turns out rubbing myself raw didn't solve anything. All I learned from my experiment is that t Elain Archeron is capable of keeping me permanently hard.

“Oh, is that what you want? If that's the case, why don't we spare you smug bastard?”

I chuckle. Cassian’s fuse is even shorter than I thought it would be. Nesta must be putting him through it. Someone should be.  

We warm up in preparation for hand to hand combat. It's not my preferred way of fighting. I don't care for the intimacy of it but if I had to spare with anyone it would be Cass and I need to get rid of this pent up energy. In fact, picturing my fist in his face is the only thing that has eased this overwhelming need burning through me.

The gym Cass has built looks amazing with everything a person could possibly want. There's high dollar equipment, a studio for classes, a strip of turf for pushing a sledge, and a locker room with a sauna. Which I fully intend to use after this. Nesta moves over and sits on a wooden bench to watch. I don't miss the gleam in her eye, a hope I might knock Cass down a peg. After his scheming with Rhys he deserves it. While I love him, I'm disappointed in his method for getting closer to Nesta. The least I can do is humble him a little infront of her. 

I join him in the center of the ring. I sigh impatiently as I watch him swagger around me without striking. He always waits for me to strike first. He thinks he is testing my patience which is fine by me, I can control myself. But, with Nesta as an audience I have no doubt that Cass will try and pull out all the stops to impress her. So, I wait and wait and wait. Growing more amused by the second as I see both Cassian and Nesta tire at my ability to wait it out. She cracks first, “are you just going to dance around or are you going to do something?” 

Cass turns to her acting as though he is distracted but I know better. I half heartedly lunge at him and he blocks me with a cocky gleam in his eyes. He presses forward with a powerful punch that I dodge. We trade blows until we fall into a familiar rhythm. Strike. Block. Counter. Repeat. Occasionally, a few blows land but we are evenly matched. He has more muscle while I have speed. 

We take a break and I turn to grab a sip of water behind me. That's when I catch Nesta staring at me out of the corner of my eye. Interesting. I take my shirt off and head back to the center of the ring. Her eyes track me as a disconcerted Cass shoots daggers at me. Not one to be out done, he also takes his shirt off and starts flexing. I can't help but chuckle, “Subtle.” I mouth at him. He narrows his eyes at me and mouths, “are you mad?” I snort which just irritates him more. It's too easy to rile him up. I lean in a bit, “if you want to impress Nesta maybe you should actually land a few blows.” 

He grunts at me, “you're a real bastard you know that?” The taunting works because he starts pacing around me more determined than before. “You’re been more quiet than normal,” he comments. 

This is his version of a taunt. I don't respond. He studies me closely, “you have bags under your eyes, is it work?” I don't answer, not wanting to give him the satisfaction. He tilts his head to the side and smiles, “No, it's a woman isn't it?” Again, I keep quiet. “It is, isn't it? Are you seeing someone? One of your secret lovers?” 

Nesta hears Cass and adds a little too curiously, “you have a girlfriend?” I'm not going to ignore Elain's sister. I like her and don't want to be rude. So, I bite out a quick, “No.” Cass though latches on to my engagement. “It is a woman isn't it?” He smiles like an idiot and I send a jab right to his face which he barely dodges. “Oh,” he practically coos, “It's definitely a woman then.” 

Nesta is watching us intently as she asks, “Is it the woman who rode your motorcycle?” Cass lets out a whistle. “You took a woman on your bike? Must be serious. Ness, he never lets anyone on that bike.”

“How many times do I have to tell you? Don't. Call. Me.That.” Nesta grits through her teeth.

I do my best to ignore them, I can't have them fishing around me and Elain. Cass sends a fist at my left jaw but I easily block it. I'm not nearly as distracted as he hopes I am. 

“I'm not seeing anyone.” I say as blandly as I can. 

It seems to work because Cass shrugs before he lobs another predictable combo at me. 

“So, that's what it is… you need to get laid.” 

I pause for half a second but it's enough. Cass saw it. He wiggles his eyebrows at me. “Ohhhh…. I see. You need to go to pound town.”

Nesta and I both scrunch our noses at that. She gives me a, “Can you believe this guy look?” which makes me appreciate her on a whole new level. Finally someone who can relate to what I've endured all these years. 

“You know, you could always call up one of your lovers.” He adds as if he is trying to be helpful. Which he most certainly is not. 

I decide to kick him in the shin which he doesn't see coming. He winces as he raises his leg like a wounded dog which makes Nesta laugh. He sends her a withering look. 

“I don't need to get laid.” 

“Sure you do. Look at how tense your shoulders are and your poor jaw has been sawing back and forth since you got here.”

“Maybe that's just the effect you have on me.”

Nesta adds, “He has that effect on me too.” I chuckle which only makes Cass angry and he lands a blow to my ribs. It hurts like hell but I'd rather die than give him the satisfaction of showing it. 

“Come on, just pull out the little black book and release some pent up energy before you do something stupid.” He says while trying to punch my face.

“When have I ever done something stupid?”

He pauses. Honest to Gods pauses and thinks it over. “Never. But you’re just a man Az, you're bound to fuck something up like the rest of us.” 

The accuracy of that ominous statement unsettles me more than I'd like it to. 

Nesta tilts her head to the side in curiosity, “Do you really have a little black book of secret lovers?”

“No.” I bite out at the same time Cass says, “Yes.” Letting Cass think I've lost focus, I turn to face Nesta giving her a wicked smirk, “I'd never be foolish enough to leave a trail.” I watch as she gulps. 

Cass lunges at me but I anticipate his move and turn to hit him with a combo that has him flat on his back. I lean in and help him up, “I'm not the one who is distracted by my cock Cass. You're projecting.” 

Cass wasn't projecting. I'm just as pathetic as he is, ready to do whatever it takes to please an Archeron sister. Because when I got a text from Feyre the next day reminding me about the monthly Inner Circle dinner I almost smiled.  Over a social event. Where I must talk to people. I really must be losing my grip on reality. 

Elain

I shouldn’t be sneaking around. It’s a bad habit but I can’t seem to help myself. People let their guard down when I’m around, and mother save me, I’m too nosey for my own good. I only meant to drop off the double fudge brownies in the townhouse kitchen before joining the others. I didn’t intend to tiptoe to the sun room where I heard Feyre whispering to Mor. 

“Cassian’s convinced he has a secret lover or four.” Feyre states as Mor snorts. 

“You have to admit his behavior since he’s returned to Hewn Hills has been off and now this rumor about a blonde on his motorcycle and an explosion? Honestly Mor, I don’t know what to think.”

I lean in further knowing it’s Azriel they are talking about. A little eavesdropping can’t hurt I tell myself. 

Mor sighs amused, “Oh Feyre, you're being a touch dramatic don’t you think? He’s a grown man if he is seeing someone, who cares?” 

Elain can’t see her sister but she just knows her lips are pursed in annoyance. If it’s one thing her Feyre can’t stand, it's being brushed aside when she wants to pry into other people’s business.

“She doth protest too much.” Came Feyre’s smug reply.  

“What are you talking about?”

“Come on Mor, he was spotted leaving here with a blonde woman on the back of his motorcycle.  You called him marvelous!”

My sister barely takes a breath before she powers onward, “I even heard you two had dinner when he flew into Velaris weeks ago. You know, at that sexy new restaurant Rhys loves to get takeout from. I’m only asking you to be honest with me, I thought we were close.”

I fight back an eye roll. Gods why was I cursed with the most dramatic sisters? If it isn’t Feyre pouting about being denied private information it was Nesta threatening to stab someone for looking at her funny. 

I can't help but smile to myself knowing that our secret is still safe. My sister’s think they know me so well, that I am boring and shy Elain… little do they know.

“For the hundredth time Feyre, Azriel and I are just friends.”

I hear a sniffle and notice someone is crying. I creep a little closer, finally able to see Mor frantically wring her hands in her lap while I see Feyre reach for a tissue. Her response seems out of character. Her complexion also is paler than normal. Her expression is almost grave. She’s acting a little hormonal. It seems like I'm not the only one hiding something. I make a mental note to check in with Feyre soon. 

So lost in my thoughts, I nearly miss Mor whispering a confession I never expected to hear. 

I close my eyes wanting to whack my sister for pushing her too far. Because Mor is gay. I suddenly feel queasy about spying on them. Mor has been nothing but kind to me and here I am trapped with a secret I have no right to knowing.

This is why you don’t snoop, Elain. Now I have three secrets to hide. What a tangled web we weave.

I turn back toward the kitchen ready to flee and beg the gods forgiveness for my wicked wicked ways when I hear Azriel’s name again. Unable to help myself I turn back around to hear better. 

“It doesn’t matter if I were into men or not. I could offer myself up to Az on a silver platter and he would deny it’s what he wants if it means having to face his feelings of inadequacy.”  

I replay the words over in my mind as I walk aimlessly through the house. Trying to put some distance between me and what I stumbled upon. Does Azriel feel inadequate? Would he truly deny himself love, if it was offered to him? I’m so lost in my thoughts that I walk directly into a wall. No, not a wall, but Lucien. 

He grabs me by the shoulders as he steadies me on my feet. It takes several seconds of blinking before I clear my mind. “Woah there, you nearly took me out.” He says with that stupid grin that everyone else finds charming. 

“Then you are easy to push over,” comes my snarky reply before I could stop myself. But instead of being dissuaded Lucien laughs, the sound catching me off guard. “Is that a slight toward my physique or politics?”

I look him over, truly taking in his form for the first time. He isn’t as imposingly tall and burly as Cassian. Nor sculpted and sleek as Azriel. But, Lucien is no less strapping. He notices my slow perusal and his eyes soften ever so slightly. That won’t do. I need to keep him at a distance. I may appreciate his form like any normal woman might and can admit we share a bond over our work but I am not his, and never will be. “Both.” I say trying to add even more bite to my tone than before. His grin widens as if delighted by my taunting. It seems Lucien may secretly enjoy a little fire. I shudder at that, Gods Elain you do not need to subject yourself to that. 

“Ouch Miss Archeron, you seem to have wounded me again.” My heart stops and my stomach turns, he is flirting with me and I flirted back, didn’t I? Perhaps Azriel’s lessons in being bad are working a little too well. I move to take a step back but he gently grabs my elbow. His touch foreign and not at all what I expect. 

“I’m actually glad you bumped into me. There is a bit of a problem I thought you should be aware of regarding some official town business.” 

I sigh dramatically and rub my temple, “Please tell me Bernadette and Pauline haven’t been vandalizing election signs again?” The last time that happened it took a lot of pleading, and what some might call unscrupulous tactics, to get them out of jail. Lucien laughs, “I would have called you right away if that were the case.” He's right, handling those two is an all hands on deck situation. I can’t help but smile and feel a sense of comradery toward him.  He is the only other member of the town council who everyone seems to treat like their own personal assistant. Not a grievance nor opinion is left unheard by the golden boy. 

I let out a shaky breath, imagining the worst, like murder or heaven forbid a letter writing campaign.  

Sensing my unease he rubs a hand gently up my arm. I fight the urge to pull away. 

“It's bad but not that bad,” he consoles. “I received several requests about banning motorcycles.” 

I scrunch my face up in confusion and then realize there is only one cause for this. 

“It's about Azriel, isn't it?” I ask, already knowing the answer. 

His hand stills as he watches me closely with those odd eyes. One is russet and the other gold. 

“Partly.” his tone suddenly flatter than before. “Some complaints were specifically about Azriel. While others fear that the new biker gang activity in Windhaven might spread here. Some think it already has…” He leaves the rest unsaid. The implication landing like a blow. 

The town has been on Azriel's case since the moment he got here. Now, he is being singled out again.

“They think Azriel is a gang member?” I ask, my cheeks heating with fanger. 

“Some do, yes. Others are just afraid because he represents what they don’t understand. He’s an outsider.”

I take a deep breath and state the obvious, “That’s not fair.” 

“No, I suppose it’s not. I brushed it off at first but the complaints kept coming. He is Feyre’s brother-in-law so I have tried to keep it from becoming… a thing. But, I’m afraid it’s quickly spinning out of my control. I need your help, the people here trust you and you’re practically his family too.”

I fight back a wince at the implication of that statement. “So, you haven’t told Feyre?”

“No, I’d rather not. I want to hold off until I’m certain there is no other option. You know how heavy handed they can be on handling local matters. Do you think you can help?”

I nod, and his smile returns. “We can chat about it more before the next town council meeting and come up with a plan.” 

“A plan to make a plan,” I say. 

He snorts, “a plan to make a plan that will surely go off the rails.”

I smile, “Like the time you tried to start a film club at the library and Twilight was the only movie people would watch?”

His eyes flash with a challenge, “No, you must be thinking about the time you added medicinal herbs to the community garden and everyone accused you of planting marijuana?”

“It was a chaste tree! It’s great for helping with period cramps.”

“Uh huh, and what did they accuse you of when you mentioned that?”

“Witchcraft.” I can’t help it, I giggle at the memory. Even after all this time Bob watches me a little too closely when I putter about the garden. We both share a laugh over our shared suffering. 

Lucien’s face falls as his attention is drawn toward something behind me. I turn to see Azriel standing in the doorway. His face is as inscrutable as ever. Our eyes meet for half a second before his gaze is back on Lucien. I pivot to look toward him, his eyes finding mine and he huffs out a breath and walks away.

I walk toward Azriel, an uneasy smile on my face. “It’s good to see you,” a polite and bland sentiment that does not match the true feelings I keep hidden. 

“It’s good to see you, too.” He does not meet my eyes and I can’t bear it.

I walk closer still and let the tips of my fingers graze his. I lean in ever so slightly, brushing my bare arm against the cobalt blue dress shirt covering his bicep. Only then does he turn to me, our eyes locking. My heart flutters as a small gasp escapes my lips.

Those hazel eyes devour the sight of me. They hold such tenderness and longing that I can’t stand the thought of looking away, of leaving him without him knowing I want him. But I must before I do something foolish. We have managed to protect our tentative relationship and I won’t risk it. 

Azriel

I try forcing myself to focus on the conversations happening around me at the dinner table and not the fact that Elain is sitting next to him. She willingly sat next to him. She laughed with him. She had a private conversation with him, that I walked in on foolishly chasing the sound of her laugh. Their interaction seemed more friendly than I‘ve ever seen them before. Not that I see them together often, I can’t stand the sight of it. But surely they do spend time together. I overheard the tail end of their conversation. They were discussing the town with such shared affection. I can’t stand that they have something that ties them together.

Okay, maybe she didn’t choose to sit next to Lucien but she didn’t wait for me to get her out of it like last time. And yes, we shared a moment earlier though it isn’t enough. It never feels like enough of her. She is keeping her distance for a reason. I wanted distance, so why am I so upset? I hate feeling jealous. I have felt it a thousand times before with Mor and it never gets any easier. If anything it’s only gotten harder. 

I bite the inside of my cheek until the pain becomes unbearable. Using the pain to numb my feelings. I make myself turn to Cass who is of course making puppy dog eyes at a scowling Nesta. 

“How’s the right hook?” I ask her. 

“Better, thanks to your help.” Cass shows his contempt by stomping on my foot hidden by the table. Typical.

“You know I can help you, Ness, much better than Az can.” He adds with a cocky grin.  

Nesta rolls her eyes, not taking his bait. 

“You should give him a chance,” Feyre says. 

Nesta hisses at her sister, “You'd like that wouldn't you? It would make you feel better about what you've done to me.” 

Rhys sets his fork down. A dark scowl swept across his face so quickly I nearly miss it. 

Feyre releases an uneasy breath. 

Before she can lob her retort, Nesta turns her wrath elsewhere. 

“I want to focus on Elain and her new secret boyfriend.” 

Elain’s eyes go wide as saucers. Not expecting her usual defender to throw her to the wolves. 

Unfortunately, Feyre takes the bait. “Yes, Elain, why don't you tell us about this mystery man.” Her eyes hopeful. 

Don't look at me. Don't look at me. 

The clever woman she is, Elain keeps her eyes locked on Nesta who is sitting pleased with her successful thwart. 

“There is nothing to tell.” Elain says quietly before taking a bite of food.

Nesta tisks, “Come on Elain, I can't be the only one whose life is ripped apart and examined for entertainment.”

I still, at the bitterness of her words. Nesta knows full well that Elain’s life is always under the microscope. But Nesta is like a wounded animal, lashing out at anyone or anything to avoid scrutiny. 

“My love life has been the focus of too many dinners as is.” She says with a calm grace that neither of her sisters seem to possess. 

“It's because he's fake, isn't it?” Nesta accuses. At this Lucien turns the weight of his full attention to Elain.  

I ball my fists at my sides. Trying to remind myself that Nesta isn't in a good place. That she's Elain's sister and if anyone can handle Nesta it's Elain. 

“Just because you're not in a good place doesn't mean you get to lash out at me. Handle your feelings like an adult or go to therapy.” Elain says showing more spirit than I've seen before. 

“Well, look who's finally decided to show some claws.”

“She's right Nesta, you don't have to lash out any time someone asks you a question.” Feyre adds.

“Piss off, miss high and mighty. You two best friends now? Makes perfect sense that Elain takes your side, doesn’t it? Pushover that she is.”

I pivot ready to aim my ire at Nesta, ready to defend Elain. Before I get a word out she's responding. “I'm an adult, stop fighting over me like I'm a child.” 

“Look who finally decided to be interesting after all.”

Elain flinches and I close my eyes unable to tolerate seeing the hurt on her face. How many times has she told me she wants to be seen as interesting, only to have it thrown in her face by someone she loves. 

“I'm allowed privacy and my relationship is mine to discuss if I choose,” her voice is strong despite the hurt she wears so obviously. 

Cassian asks, “so, it's a secret… That's funny because Azriel has a secret lover too.” 

“How interesting,” Amren says, smiling into her cup.

I feel Rhysand's eyes boring into the side of my head. 

Mor just looks between Elain and I with a look of hopeful amusement.

“I knew it,” says Feyre, clapping her hands, “who is she?”

“Oh, he’ll never tell. He never does,” adds Cass. “Maybe Elain has learned something from him.”

I'm going to kill him. 

Lucien turns his focus from Elain to me. Clearly mulling over the situation at hand. Nesta eyes me curiously, as if seeing something new she hasn’t noticed before. 

“A gentleman never tells,” I add, giving Feyre a wink. 

“That's not fair, Az!” Feyre whines. 

“Get used to it girl, he's had countless lovers and I've never learned a single name.” Amren says. Varian adds, “his reputation is well known even in Adriata.”

I notice Elain breathe a sigh of relief. If I have to take their scrutiny to spare her I will. 

“Of course he doesn't share their names, there are too many to memorize. It's easier If he just calls them all baby, isn't that right?” Cass chuckles to himself. It’s like the man has a death wish. He’s not wrong of course, as a roguish teen I may have done that but it's been well over a decade since I've stooped so low. 

“Yes, baby,” I croon to Cass. He lets out a howling laugh. 

“Oh my god, is that why his contact name is ‘daddy’ in your phone?” Nesta gapes.

Cass just shrugs, “among other things.” 

Everyone breaks out in a raucous laugh, except for Rhys who is still watching me closely. His eyes shift to Elain who is smiling brightly. 

By the time dessert is brought out, all the tension from earlier has been eased. Cass and Rhys took turns recounting my glory days to the sisters and laughing at my expense. I don't mind the ribbing as long as Elain is no longer under scrutiny. 

She brought double fudge brownies as a treat and I would have eaten them all if my hand wasn't swatted away. Rhys invites the group to move to the living room to play card games. I take my chance and wrap my hand around Elain's wrist and pull her into the shadowed alcove beneath the stairs. 

“Hello, lover,” I teasingly whisper in her ear. She pulls away slightly, “one of many?” she asks with a teasing glint in her honey colored eyes. I graze my fingers along the smooth skin over her cheek, “Elain, I…” The sound of voices nearby pulls my focus away. “We shouldnt do this here,” I pull her closer as I look behind me to see how much time we have left. “Go up to my room, the third door on the left in fifteen minutes.” 

I turn back to her and she's biting her bottom lip in that enticing way. She nods before I walk away. 

Elain

The moment I’m inside Azriel’s room panic sets in. Did I just willingly enter the room of the great seducer? I’m not prepared for this. Azriel may be a master at sneaking around but not me. What if he proposes we take our relationship to the next level? What if I can’t resist him luring me to his bed. Do I want to resist? If I didn’t, was I willing to face the consequences of our secret relationship being revealed the most tawdry way possible? With me chanting his name as I climax with our friends and family downstairs? 

Before I let myself answer that question, I look around his room and instantly let out a laugh of relief. I spot the cheetah print throw draped over his hot pink bedding. At the head of the bed there are sequin throw pillows in various shapes and colors. In the corner is a mosaic end table topped off with a lava lamp. The only evidence that this is Azriel’s space is the black leather jacket hanging from the hook on the back of the door. Nothing about this room suggests a modern day rake lives here. Perhaps someone’s slutty grandmother or that gigolo I threatened him with last month.

I turn around amused by the status of his current living situation. Admiring more Precious Moments figurines than I can count and holy shit is that the ‘Love One Another’ figurine. Clearly I have nothing to worry about. 

The door suddenly opens and Azriel rushes in and closes the door behind him. He leans back against it like he escaped an enraged bear. “You wouldn’t believe the level of detail Amren can go into about Varian’s cock when she’s had a little too much to drink.” He is still wearing the same dark blue button up shirt but now his sleeves are rolled up revealing his heavily corded forearms. He has an excited and down right devilish smile that makes him look like an entirely different man. It fades when he takes in my expression, “why are you smiling like that?”

“Oh, it’s nothing,” I say, waving him off, unable to stop giggling. He cocks his head at me skeptically and tosses his phone on his bed. “Okay, clearly it’s not nothing. Why are you giggling like a schoolgirl?”

I can’t help it, I finally give in and let out a cackle. Tears prick my eyes. I’ve wasted so much time feeling intimidated by Azriel’s prowess. Just earlier I was feeling jealous of his secret lovers when he is clearly a teenage girl with a love of collectible children’s figurines. 

“It’s silly, I was a little nervous when you asked me to sneak into your bedroom. Especially after everyone went on and on about your… reputation. But then I realized you were living like Austin Powers and I didn’t feel so worried anymore.”

“Wait,” he says looking offended, “Why don’t you feel worried anymore?”

“Because,” I say laughing as I picture Azriel trying to seduce someone with a disco ball above the bed. “Look at this room! The only thing you’ll be holding in here is a seance to talk to Liberace.” 

He scoffs, looking away briefly only to meet my gaze again, “You think this decor matters one bit? If I wanted to seduce you, the sequins and the pink frills aren’t going to stop me.”

I roll my eyes, “Okay, Casanova.” I plop down on the unsexy bed. “Here I thought the notorious Azriel Rosehall would live somewhere with elegant mood lighting and a record player in the corner where he would offer to show his favorite slow jams. A true den of iniquity.”

“Well, I don't love that name.”

“But, really it’s putting me in the mood to watch a Bratz movie. Does this thing even…” I bounce up and down on the bed a few times. “Oh my gosh, it doesn’t even squeak, Azriel! What kind of ladies’ man are you?” I lose it and fall back on the bed in a fit of laughter. 

He watches me amused, “Are you enjoying yourself?”

“Most certainly. Because you sir, are a disgrace to bad boys everywhere! I’m tempted to take a picture of you next to the Kylie Mongue poster and post it on Instagram.” 

Azriel steps toward me, “Alright, get your ass up.”

I feel giddy and loose-limbed from joy as I sit up and take his outstretched hand, “What are we going to do, bedazzle your motorcycle jacket?”

But my breath catches as he spins me around and pins me against his bedroom door. His very large, very warm body is pressed flush against mine. “Because you’ve insulted my carefully crafted image of a heathen, your next lesson in being bad starts now. I’m going to demonstrate a few things -”

Gods save me.

Azriel takes both of my hands and pins them beside my head as he carefully interlaces our fingers. His searing gaze is locked onto me. The naughty twinkle in his eyes tells me he won’t miss a single one of my reactions. His hands are rough and large. His pressure isn’t too firm and not too soft. Just the right amount. My lips part on instinct and Azriel’s eyes lower to my mouth - watching the moment that it happens. The smallest smile teases at his full lips before he moves his mouth to the shell of my ear. His breath tickles me, sending pleasing little waves of pleasure down my entire body. My neck is so sensitive, even the faintest of kisses are enough to make me finish. My response betrays that fact as he teases me effortlessly. New sensations I haven’t felt before surface in the pit of my stomach and lower… He smells so good. Feels so good. 

“First things first…,” His bedroom voice is dark as night and silken. So hot. “It’s never about the room. The room doesn’t play a part in seducing.” His voice deepens, amused and cocky. This is exactly how I imagined Azriel as a lover. No, he’s even better than I imagined. 

He continues, his breath hot and heavy against my sensitive neck. “In a bind a closet, a bathroom, even the back of a motorcycle will do just fine.” His mouth moves even lower and he inhales deeply. Never touching or kissing, just breathing me in. “Decor doesn’t matter.” He moves back up my throat as he speaks. Then he switches sides. I tilt my head back offering more of myself to him. I want to make sure he reaches every spot, every possible crevice. 

“Because, if I’ve decided to be bad Elain and capture my lover's attention, from the moment we are alone, her pulse will be racing. Her mind will be solely focused on my touch, my smell, and my desire that the color of the bedspread won’t even cross her mind.”

His hands continue to pin me to the wall with the most delicious amount of pressure that makes me squirm. A desire so potent floods me that I feel my knees start to buckle. Desire I didn’t know I was missing. Desire I didn’t know I needed. Now I’m afraid I’ll be deprived of it for the rest of my life. 

Azriel moves from my neck, fanning his breath across my jaw to hover over my lips. “Elain, open your eyes and look at me,” he commands, and until now I hadn’t realized I closed them. When my eyes flutter open, I feel drunk. His hazel gaze is dark now and heavy on mine. I feel desperate for him to kiss me. Ready for him to teach me more, ready to be bad for him. With him. To him. I barely remember what I was jealous about. All I know is the sound of my pulse drumming in my ear and it’s saying the same thing over and over again. Kiss me. Kiss me. Kiss me. 

With his mouth only a blink away from mine, he smiles, “Believe me?”

I nod silently.

He releases my hands and takes a step back. My arms fall to my side. For a moment, I am still pinned to the wall. Unable to move for fear of my knees giving out completely. I mourn the loss of him even though he is just there, just a few feet away. His head turns to the side, eyes refusing to look at me. Why didn’t he kiss me? He’s done it before.

“Why did you stop?” I demand. 

He shakes his head. “You’re not ready, Elain. You say you are but you aren’t willing to jump off the cliff into the unknown. You are holding yourself back and I’m not going to be the one to push you.” 

I shake my head in frustration. 

But, he continues on accusing, “you want cheap thrills. You are just hiding from the life you didn't choose.” 

He stops and takes a deep breath, “you're just using me to give a big fuck you to fate.”  

I feel anger I’ve never known rise within me. His words don't make sense. Our whole arrangement is about him helping me. Was that not a lesson he just offered me? He is forcing distance between us. It’s a cop out. Just like him letting the others talk about his lovers. He was trying to push me away. He wants… He wants… and just like that the anger I feel morphs into something else. 

“I could offer myself up to Az on a silver platter and he would deny it’s what he wants if it means having to face his feelings of inadequacy.” Isn’t that what Mor had said? I close my eyes and steady my nerves. 

I take a step forward and another until I am in front of him. I reach onto my tip toes and take his chin and turn his face toward me. His expression is hard steel, a mask he uses far too often to hide how he really feels. 

“It’s not me who’s holding myself back, Azriel.” I slide my fingers over his chiseled jaw. “You won’t let go, you won’t give into this.” His eyebrows bunch in confusion. 

“You think I don’t see you, that I can’t tell that you want me as much as I want you.” His eyes churn with emotion. 

“You draw me in just to push me back out. You guard your heart because you're afraid I don't want this.” I look into those eyes that see so much but never willing to believe. 

“I'm not Mor, Azriel. You think I shouldn’t want you but I do. This is more than just lessons and games to me.” I say as I slide my finger tips against his lips. 

“What is it?” He whispers, sounding pained. 

“It’s everything.” I sigh as I reach for him, draping my arms across his neck and kiss him like I have always dreamed. 

He groans into me and kisses me back with a burning passion. My feet are no longer on the ground as he spins and tosses me onto the bed.  Before I can move he is on top of me pressing his erection between my legs. I let a wanton moan and the sheer pleasure of it. 

His large hand covers my mouth. “Quiet.”

I whimper into his palm. Utterly ruined by his dominance. “Fuck.” He says grinding into me. “You have no idea what you do to me.”

I feel my thighs start to shake. I’m already on the verge of cumming and he hasn’t even truly touched me. “I’m going to ruin you.” He pants into my ear. “I’m going to…”

I startle as someone knocks on the door, “Azriel, are you in there?”

It’s Rhysand.

[enrichment-time-in-my-enclosure]

Chapter 4 - Liability

<-last-masterlist-next->

!!Written portion under the cut!!

Izuku lays on the bench next to you as you carefully pluck a soft feather from the back of your wings. You'd need one big enough to wrap his forearm, so it took a bit more effort as you strained to pull it out from the root.

"Does that hurt?" An expression of concern covers the green-haired man's face as you cringe at the sore feeling following the removal.

"Just a bit. I've been off duty for a while due to all the backlash and stuff... so my feathers grew in a bit thicker, and I'm not used to taking them out anymore. Quirk still works like a charm, though."

You carefully wrap his arm, and within a few seconds, it's as good as new.

"holy shit..."

"I guess it takes less time than I expected now. huh.."

Just as Izuku is about to start his energetic tirade about how awesome and helpful your quirk is, a cold hand rests on your shoulder, and a familiar stoic voice speaks in your ear.

"As I said, I need to talk to you. I can't keep this a secret any longer."

Shoto guides you out of the tent and into a more private storage room within the training facility. His face is unreadable, but he has an air of uncertainty that makes you nervous. Shoto is rarely worried like this.

"I'm talking to you here because I know the commission has your phone tapped, and you technically aren't supposed to know about this."

You weren't new to your government-assigned guardians at the commission hiding things from you. Ever since you were a little girl, they kept you entirely out of the know. They proclaimed it was for your own good, but you knew the truth. Like everyone else in the hero world, they saw you as an asset. One that must be kept in perfect order. That meant not informing you of certain important things to avoid stressing your mind...

...or prompting you to think for yourself.

"Is my brother in danger? Or you and the other students?" The words of Mr. Takahashi echoed in your brain.

You'll only become a liability to these people.

"No. Actually, this time, it's only you."

You stiffen at his response.

"Me?"

"Last night, when I was on the phone, I was getting exclusive intel from my father. We have confirmation that All for One and the League of Villains plan to ambush the school with the goal of taking you hostage."

"So what, they want to hold me for ransom or lure in my brother to take him out?"

"They want your quirk."

A chill runs through your body at the thought. The league was extremely powerful. Each member had a quirk that could take you out in seconds. All for One, taking your quirk would be detrimental to the heroes.

The League of Villains would be practically invincible.

"You weren't supposed to know because the commission thought you'd try and surround yourself with us. The way my father was talking about it made it seem like they were more concerned with bad publicity for hero students than your safety."

That tracks.

"So what? They were just gonna let me get taken?"

"Most likely. I'm not sure what the plan was from there. Just be prepared. I'll try to stick by you when I can, but when it happens, I'm not sure what I'm allowed to do."

Great. So the commission was planning on using you as human bait to get the League right where they want them.

This whole plan sounded half-baked to you. All for One could steal a quirk in a matter of seconds. How could they guarantee he wouldn't execute his own plan before you were taken to safety?

"Fuck. Shoto, I don't know what to do now."

"I know. I'll be here. I won't let anything bad happen to you."

Overcome with the need to be close to your dearest friend in your moment of need, you wrap your arms around the tall, split-haired man's neck in a much-needed embrace.

Cautiously, he wraps his around your back, resting his chin on your head as he attempts to soothe your worry.

His heart nearly beats out of his chest at your touch.

"Y/n?"

"Yeah, Sho?"

"I promised to protect you when we were children... you're always looking after me when I overwork myself and get injured. It's time I put those words into action again."

You look up into his two-toned eyes and feel your heart slow with his breathing.

"To hell with what the commission tells me to do. Anyone who tries to bring harm to my...

...my best friend...

...will meet my flames."

A/n- Finally conflicttttttt!! I'll reveal more of your backstory as we go along!! Obviously the whole Hawks backstory has a massive hand in all of it. Plussssss more todoroki family interaction coming soon (in unexpected ways)

-----Taglist-----

@lunamoonbby

@themultifandomgirl

@r31h4

[3d-wifey]

And They'd Find Us in A Week - Chapter 11

Pairing: Finnick Odair x Reader Word Count: 8.3k Synopsis: Here! Playlist: Listen up! Tag list: - @melancholicmelanin, @yvy1s, @glomp-me, @honethatty12, @swftlore, @hashcakes, @antoheartit, @finnickodaddy, @lilifl0wer, @antoheartit, @kermitcrimess, @persophonekarter, @aawdrea, @obaewankenobis, @xyxlyn A/N: LADIES N GENTLEMEN, THE MOMENT YOU'VE BEEN WAITING FOR! there are multiple POV changes in this, I'm training yall for the arena and Mockingjay. FYI: I was so disheartened bc this felt like the worst past I've written for this story :(((

Past (xii) - Finnick

[21 & 22] - DISTRICT FOUR

Finnick is sitting at his desk, probably looking as worn out and exhausted as he feels. It’s early morning, and he hasn’t slept for two days. He’s been writing for hours, trying to find the right words to say. The sun had just set when he poured himself into the seat, and now—he glances to his left—the first tendrils of sunlight are peaking up.

The room is quiet, except for Finnick's labored breathing. His hands are shaking, a side effect of the stress that's been building inside him like a pressure cooker. Snow's visit has left him reeling, unable to process the implications of the deal he's been forced to make. He knows he must write you a letter, but the thought fills him with despondency. Something that normally fills him with insurmountable excitement and anticipation fills him with devastation. It feels like, like… There’s nothing he can compare it to. Not everything feels like something else and Finnick knows this kind of grief is very rarely experienced. 

What is he supposed to do? He hasn’t opened the last letter you sent, knowing it will be the last one that won’t carry the weight of mourning. He knows that you'll write to him again, that you won’t take this lying down. You’ll write and write, and he...will do nothing.

It sits in front of him, innocuous and unassuming. Something devastating folded in a green envelope and wrapped in your scent like a well-dressed bomb. Does his fear outweigh his longing for you?

He picks it up, holding it gingerly in his hands.

No, he realizes, it doesn’t.

He’s careful to tear the seal on the flap and your perfume wafts up like a surprise. He takes a deep breath, savoring the scent, trying to steel himself for what comes next.

Dear Finn,

I feel like I’ve missed you longer than I’ve had the chance to know you. It's been three months now, but maybe by the time this letter gets to you, we'll both be on our way to the Capitol. I'm working on being more optimistic, but that uphill battle is becoming steeper the longer I'm away from you. 

I keep thinking about when I first met you. When I looked into your eyes, I didn't see fireworks exploding or any of that other shit they depict in those gaudy Capitol romance novels. I looked into your eyes and saw you, something far more breathtaking than fireworks. And what a sight you were.

Three years back, you said something I never agreed with, that it was hard to love you. At the moment, I didn’t get to say what I really wanted to because I was eighteen and the thought of being so emotionally vulnerable made my teeth itch. 

I wanted to say that you aren't hard to love. I wanted to say loving you has been the easiest thing I have ever done. And that's why it was so difficult. I could never let myself love you—let myself have you because how could I possibly deserve to? But that’s the kicker. It’s not hard to love you, Finn, it’s impossible not to.

Something happened recently that made me realize that I’m not the most forthcoming person when it comes to my feelings. But, Finn, know that my love for you is never in doubt. How I feel about you may be complex, but it’s not complicated. I love you desperately, humanly, simply. Without even trying, you peel me back to my core, but if you only dug a little deeper you’d find your picture framed and hanging along the walls of my soul. 

I miss you, more than I was prepared to—and I was prepared to miss you considerably.

We may not be next to each other, but we’re under the same sky, and each glowing point on that backdrop of black is a star—a sun at the center of someone’s solar system. 

In some other universe, on a different Earth, there’s a girl in love with a boy whose freckles run like constellations. On another, there’s a girl who’s in love with how her boy’s eyes squint when he smiles.

That's the one constant. There are billions of stars, billions of universes, and I love you in every one of them. 

Tears are blurring his vision before he can read how you close the letter and he has to sit back as the full weight of what he’s about to do hits him all at once. Your words are like a balm to his soul, but they burn him just as much as they soothe him. A reminder of what he’s losing just as much as a reminder of what he’s fighting for. There was never a need to put a label on what you two had, what you were to each other because it would never be replicated. It had always just been ‘yours’. Now, with a flick of his pen, it’ll be nothing.

Maybe, he thinks, maybe there’s a way I can explain why I’m doing this, some kind of code or something. Maybe I can still meet with her, just in secret. But Snow… It always comes back to Snow. 

Snow reads these letters, and surely he'll be more vigilant of Finnick to make sure he keeps his side of the deal. Besides, if you knew the real reason he’s doing this—that it’s against his will, that he wouldn’t even think to do this in his worst nightmare—you’ll latch on, consequences be damned. 

He’s doing this for you. He has to remind himself that it’s your life on the line here, not just his heart.

Still. 

He's careful when folding the letter back, only bending it along the preexisting lines. He sets it beside himself. 

He picks up a piece of paper from the stack in front of him tucked against the wall, twirling his pen along his fingers. His leg bounces, nails tapping on the desk. 

He writes something down and comes to a stuttering halt. It isn't good enough. He crumbles it up, throws it in the trash, and picks up a new one. 

Write, crumble, trash, repeat. 

He's stuck in a loop, unable to find the right words. The pressure is building, and he can feel himself starting to crack. He needs to get this done, needs to find a way to say goodbye.

Write, crumble, trash, repeat. 

He's lost track of time, doesn't know how long he's been sitting here. The words are eluding him, and he's starting to feel like he's lost his grip on reality.

Finally, he puts pen to paper and the words flow out of him like a dam breaking. He writes about his love for you, about how much he misses you, about how impossible it is to imagine a future without you. He writes about his fear and his grief, about the weight of the world on his shoulders.

He writes you goodbye. 

When he's done, he holds your letter carefully, tucking it back into its envelope. He knows what he has to do, knows that there's no turning back now. 

With trembling hands, he picks up the tan envelope and slides his letter inside. He seals it with a kiss, feeling the weight of his decision like a physical burden. 

He takes a deep breath, trying to calm his racing heart, and places the letter on the stack in front of him. It's done. The words are written, the decision made. 

He sits back in his chair, feeling numb and hollow. He doesn't know what comes next, but he knows that he'll face it head-on. For you.

Past (xii) - You 

[21 & 22] - DISTRICT ELEVEN

Finnick's reply came faster than you expected it to. 

You plop down in your office chair, giddy as you rub at your sore cheeks. You've been smiling like an idiot since you picked up the letter from the Mayor's office. You tear into the envelope and pause. 

The words are kind of smudged, dried drops of something smearing the ink. Luckily, you can still read it. 

My heart, 

My moon and stars. 

I must have rewritten these words at least a dozen times by now. You should see the pile of crumpled paper next to me. You'd call it wasteful, but I'm sure you'd be secretly charmed by how nervous you make me after all these years. 

There's no way to dance around it, and I know how much you hate when people mince their words.

It pains me to think it, let alone write it.

This will be my last letter to you. 

I know you have a hundred and one questions bouncing around that beautiful brain of yours, you'll want to know why. And the answer is, there is no why. I've decided that it's best, for both of us, to stop. Stop the letters, stop the meetings. 

It ends here. 

I don't want you to hate me. But if that makes it easier for you to stay away from me, then despise me. More than the Peacekeepers, more than the Capitol, more than Snow. Take that loathing and hold onto it like you used to hold me. 

But, selfishly, I want you to know what I'll be holding onto. 

Those little moments outside of time where you and I were the center of each other's universe, two stars orbiting each other. The balcony of my room, the floor of yours. 

I want you to know this because I don't want you to doubt that I love you. 

Because I do. I love you. I could say it a thousand times, and it still wouldn't be enough. I could say it until my tongue falls off and I'd find a way to sign it to you. 

I could live a thousand lifetimes, be a thousand different people, and I will never love someone like I love you. 

I think of your smile and I fall in love again. I think of your touch and I fall in love again. I won't leave you without you knowing this. I'd sooner stop breathing. 

There are plenty of things I should be thanking you for, but if I tried to make a list, I'd run out of paper. 

I felt...free with you. As free as anyone can be in our situation. I've never felt so close to another person before—I never let myself. 

I thought it would pass eventually, like a sand castle when it's high tide. Noticeable, beautiful, but temporary.

But I can tell you now, that was such bullshit. Since that first dance, there was never a moment I wasn’t in love with you. I loved you before I knew I was capable of it, before I knew I had it in me, and you had my heart before I even knew it was there. I saw the thorns of your past and held my hands out, ready to bleed if it meant I could touch you.

And that scared me. The very thing that gave me strength was my biggest weakness. That’s a hard pill to swallow at sixteen and it’s just as daunting at twenty-two. 

Years ago, you asked me if I could wish for anything, what would it be? I still wish I was a different person, someone you could be proud of. And I wish that person got to grow old with you. 

God, you don't know how badly I want to grow old with you.  

I have no doubt that there's a planet out there under a different sun where we end up together. Hand in hand with the two kids we always talked about. A little girl that'll have me wrapped around her finger because she'll look just like you. And a little boy that'll drive you up the wall because he's a little too much like me. That universe is where my heart lives.  

We'll find it someday, just you and me. Until then, they'll find our love written in the stars. In every constellation.  

-Yours until words lose meaning,  

Finnick O.  

You reread the letter.

Then reread it again. You keep rereading it until the words refuse to sit still, letters blurring together. 

It ends here? What’s he talking about? He can't possibly mean the two of you. He can't. 

But he’s ending it. He ended it.

Why would he—?

He said there’s no reason, but…but there has to be. 

You try to think of anything you did—anything you said that could have led to this but you're coming up blank. 

This doesn't make any sense. It doesn't line up with the Finnick you know. 

The letter says that he loves you, and you thought you knew he loved you, but it’s pretty hard to believe that when he’s leaving you.

He promised he'd stay with you, he promised, and Finnick doesn't break his promises. Not with you. No. Not after everything you've been through together. You only have each other. 

The paper falls from your trembling hands to the desk. 

No. You only have Finnick. But, Finnick—he doesn't want you anymore, right? So, where does that leave you? What else do you have? 

A grandfather clock ticks in the background, though it sounds muted to your ears. 

You look down at the paper and find wet spots, and ink more smeared than before. Your cheeks are wet. Are you crying?

Stupid. You grit your teeth, fury mixing with despair. Stupid tears. Stupid Finnick. You wipe at your cheeks roughly, angry at yourself for being weak enough to cry over him. There are a million and one reasons this could have happened and they all begin and end with you. You have no one to blame but yourself.

You know what it feels like for your body to break. You know what it is to be drained down to your skin, nerves, muscles, and bones. You've come eerily close to knowing what it's like to have your mind broken. 

But this is new. This is what it feels like to have your heart broken. It's sudden, and it rips you apart on its way in. Not an arrow, but a knife. Cold and serated. It's quicker than you thought it'd be, but it hurts just the same. 

You’re so cold. You don't think you've ever been this cold before. Not even when you were nine and you got such bad hyperthermia that you couldn’t work for the rest of the winter. He always ran hot, you think distantly. And all his warmth has left you. 

You hold on to yourself because no one else will. You would have preferred your body breaking. At least that heals. 

“I can’t,” you weep, stuttering over betrayal and loss, “I can’t do this alone.”

You press your forehead into the desk, your body shaking with the sobs you’re holding back. It hurts so bad. Pain sits rooted in your chest, sharp and rigid like a peach pit. Your heart doesn’t beat, it throbs. Throbs like a festering wound, irritated and infected. 

You pull at your shirt and dig your nails into your chest. If you press hard enough through the skin and fascia and muscles, you could pull out the problem.

But that’s impossible. There’s nothing there. It’s the absence that hurts, that gaping Finnick-shaped hole. 

Did you get ahead of yourself? Thinking anything could last with someone who shines as bright as him? Maybe…maybe if you were a little more like him, if you shined just as bright. 

You snort, anger flaring briefly. 

You’re not a star, you’re not even the moon. How can the sun love the same darkness it chases away?

He described the ocean to you once. Vast and endless, like it could go on forever. And he told you about all the people who get lost at sea. Now you’re one of them. 

You have capsized, water rushing up past your neck and into your mouth and nose, just as salty as your tears. Your lungs burn from the lack of air, you can’t breathe and no one will come for you because you're as good as dead.

Here you sit in your study in your home that isn’t really yours, far away from any ocean, but you're drowning anyway. 

You drown and you drown and you drown and you do it alone.

Present (X) - Finnick 

[23 & 24] - THE CAPITOL

It’s a last resort, a unanimous choice between them all. A wordless decision that the victors made to appeal to the Capitol citizens. Though they’re all using different means, it’s all for the same result. That’s what Finnick has to remind himself when he’s called on stage after Beetee. 

The crowd screams at his entrance and he locks his hands behind his back. He smiles, nodding to his adoring fans as he stands beside Caesar.

“Finnick, I understand you have a message for somebody out there. A special somebody.” The crowd hoots and hollers at the dramatics of it all and the idea of one of them being the special someone close to his heart. He chuckles and looks down. The Capitols being painfully predictable is finally paying off. All according to plan. “Can we hear it?”

He could spew some generic flowery shit that could apply to literally anyone he’s come in contact with, but…

He looks at the camera. Fourteen victors will perform before you, so you should still be in your dressing room. Are you watching? Watching him?

"My love, my star. My heart is yours. And…and if I had to pick a place to die, it would be in the warmth of your arms. Your smile, the last thing I see and your lips, the last thing I taste. Everything I have ever done, I have done for you.”

Caesar pouts at the audience as they coo at his love letter and he wishes they never heard it. He wishes he could have said it to you directly. Those words, they’re yours and they should have been for your ears only. And, yet, here he is, relaying his heart to you through a screen.

Look how far we’ve fallen, Star. 

“Oh, my. That’s very touching, Finnick. Isn’t it? I’m sure whoever it is, is listening and feeling truly loved.” 

“I hope you’re right, Caesar.”

They allowed Mags to opt out of her interview on account of her not being able to speak. How kind, he scoffs. He settles on the raised platform beside her and he briefly squeezes her hand. 

You okay? He mouths and she nods, smiling. 

One by one, each victor comes with their own approach to sway the masses. Oh, he knows there's no way they'll be canceling the games. Finnick is more likely to drain the ocean with a teaspoon before Snow even considers stopping this cruelty. But it’s worth a shot, he supposes. It can’t possibly make going into the arena any worse.

Besides Johanna's impassioned speech, nothing the other victors do stands out to him. Then, you're called out.  

He sinks his teeth into his lip as the audience applauds at your entrance.

From what he can recall, your outfit is a remix of the dress you wore in your first interview as if it has aged and matured with you. It’s gained a long train and the hip-high thigh slits that your stylist is known for.

You blow kisses to the crowd and they, understandably, go wild. You turn to Caesar with a smile and the overhead lights shine on you, painting your skin in soft lighting like a blanket. He takes a breath. And another, until he notices he’s breathing in sync with you.

He blinks when the crowd breaks into raucous laughter and realizes he’s missed something.

"Oh, we all know just how shy you are." Caesar smiles, holding his laugh behind clenched teeth in that way of his that reminds Finnick of an overachieving beaver. The crowd laughs with him and your cheeks must hurt from holding that coy smile. "Now, the last time we talked, you said you were composing a new piece." Caesar pulls a violin out from…somewhere behind him and presents it to you like a gift. Finnick doesn’t know what he was expecting, but he didn’t think you’d use the violin as your strategy. Mostly because of how much you hate it. Or maybe you don’t anymore. Perhaps you’ve grown to love it and he’s none the wiser. “Can you play it for us now?" The crowd clamors in ooohs and ahhhs at the idea. It's always been a privilege to hear you play. Finnick watches your face closely.

It wasn't your favorite thing to do, but you took to it like a fish to water. Usually, Snow would have you play at the more "personal" get-togethers. But every once in a while, you would compose a song for Finnick . And when it was just the two of you, you'd share it with him. He'd sit in front of you in awe as you played. He doesn't have a musical bone in his body, but he can hum every piece from memory. 

“You’re kinda putting me on the spot here, but, sure. I would love to play it for you all.” You laugh. You place the instrument under your chin and position your fingers and bow.

And you play.

It's not showy like the pieces you usually play for the public. Not grand or performative, but soft and soulful. Melancholy. It feels nostalgic almost, like something you would write for him. 

The haunting melody carries throughout the silent room, and it is as if everyone is breathing with the lilting notes. Everyone but Finnick, who can't seem to catch his breath. 

He looks down, squeezing his eyes shut, nose scrunching as he fights back tears. Because as much as you may hate the instrument, you play it as if it's an extension of your body. And you've always been better at showing how you feel than saying it. 

It sounds like a goodbye. 

You come to a stop and Finnick's lungs stop constricting with your movements.

When you finish, it’s quiet before Caesar clears his throat and gives you a small smile that almost looks genuine.

“That was marvelous, my dear. Truly moving—wasn’t that moving?” He asks the audience, and Finnick will be surprised if there’s a dry eye in the crowd. Even their applause sounds sad. 

“Thank you, Caesar.” You nod at the praise. “You taught me so much—all of you. If I had known this would be the last time I got to play for you—” You trail off into a sob and the crowd coos. The words may be fake, but he isn’t too sure about the tears. He wonders if you think you won’t make it out of the arena alive—not that he would let that happen. If he could just talk to you, and have an actual conversation, he could know what you’re thinking.

Caesar pats your lower back and Finnick’s eyes narrow. “And you played beautifully.”

You hand the violin back with a watery smile and, fake or not, Finnick hates to see you cry. 

You’re met with a standing ovation as you climb to your place on the platform. With the way the victors are positioned, he stands directly behind you. Or, well, strictly speaking, he’s more diagonal than directly behind you. Still, how lucky is he? He could, theoretically, lean forward and catch a whiff of your perfume—

He gathers himself, straightening up and lacing his fingers behind his back. He squeezes the space between his thumb and forefinger.

Katniss spins and her wedding dress transforms in a flurry of fire before their eyes. 

“Again with the fire.” He mutters under his breath.

The crowd is in awe as she spreads her wings, but he isn’t so easily cowed. Though, he might not be the target audience. Finnick’s never been particularly fond of birds, even if they are mockingjays.

"You know Katniss and I, we've been luckier than most. And I wouldn't have any regrets at all if it weren't…if—" Peeta stops himself, glancing around nervously.

"If it weren't for what? What?"

“If it weren’t for the baby.”

Now, that catches his attention. Gasps echo throughout the room at Peeta’s revelation. Finnick’s eyebrows almost touch his hairline with how high they raise. Caesar tries to do damage control, but the situation is quickly escalating. 

“Call off the games!”

“This is cruel!”

He purses his lips around a growing smile, but he can’t hide it for long when the crowd starts shouting. That’s…certainly one way to get the audience riled up. He catches the slight smirk on Peeta’s face as he watches the commotion he caused and Finnick’s a little jealous. 

Chaos unfurls in a way he never thought the Capitols were capable of. They’ve always been so docile; sheep shepherded into any direction Snow lead them. But it makes sense. The romance act was meant to fool the Capitol and fool them, it has. He hides the vindictive glee he feels at the riot breaking out in the name of the victors, but only barely. He would kill to see Snow's face right now. 

How does it feel, he wonders, to see your people rebel in support of the savages you tried to paint us out to be?

He looks over, brows furrowed, as Mags takes his hand with a proud smile and he glances down in time to see you take Chaff’s hand. He pauses for a moment before taking the hand the woman from Five offers him. In sync, the victors all raise their hands in a show of solidarity. 

“Stop the games!”

“Call them off!”

Finnick grins big at the mayhem unfolding before him and they keep shouting long after the lights cut out.

Present (X) - You & Finnick

[23 & 24] - THE CAPITOL

“Star!”

It didn't take long for the tributes to be escorted off the platforms and as he chases after you, Finnick realizes that he vastly underestimated just how many people stood between you and him. He isn't sure if he's too far away for you to hear or if you’re actively ignoring him.

”Star!” Finnick pushes through the crowd of victors and stage crew to get closer. Chaff glances at him and now he knows for sure that you’re ignoring him.

“Stubborn.” He mutters as some of his fellow victors let him pass, glancing at him before continuing their conversations. But, as he’s said before, he’s just as stubborn as you. He racks his brain for something that’ll catch your attention before he loses what might be his last chance with you. “The message was for you! ”

You pause at the entrance of the elevator at Finnick's shout. You're so close to getting away, so close. Your escape is a hair's breadth and a footstep away, but you remember how you felt sitting in your dressing room watching Finnick's interview. Was there a pang of jealousy over the possibility of the message being for someone else? Honestly, it couldn't even be categorized as jealousy. 

You look over your shoulder and his lungs stop constricting. He’s got you. Now, for the hardest part: keeping you.

There are dozens of eyes on him, people milling around as if they aren’t honed in on whatever this is. He can’t blame them for being curious, he’s a little confused himself. He went into this with no plan, not that he would have been able to stick to one with how you’re looking at him.

“What?” As he approaches, the lingering crowd fully parts for him. You regard the gathering audience warily. 

“What I said, the message—it was for you.” He repeats. 

He can’t afford to be coy, that hasn't worked the last dozen times he's attempted a conversation with you and it definitely won't work now. He knows if he doesn’t catch you now, there won’t be any more chances.

Peeta dropped a baby bomb, and, somehow, this is the most dramatic thing to happen tonight. His eyes are locked intently on you, either unaware of all the attention he’s captured or just uncaring.

You look over to Chaff for help but he just smirks at your growing embarrassment. You watch in disbelief as he walks away using the excuse of finding Seeder to escape. 

“Finnick, this isn’t the time.” You glance between him and the floor, tracing the threading in his boots instead of the desperation in his eyes. 

"Can you please just,” he shifts his weight on his feet, "can you look at me, Star? Please, look at me." He lifts his hand like he aims to reach you, but hesitates. 

This situation is developing into something far more intimate than your current company should allow. More intimate than you should allow. You can always walk away, turn your back to him, and get on one of the idle elevators—let it end here, once and for all. The only thing stopping you would be the completely unfounded guilt and regret. 

You don't owe him anything, let alone your time. 

And, yet. Yet, yet, yet.

Maybe you can get some sort of closure and set clear boundaries before you go into the arena and—that reasoning sounds weak even to you.

Both of you could die tomorrow and truthfully, you don't want to walk away from him; you've never wanted to.

Besides, it's not like he can hurt you any worse than he already has. 

Finnick jolts when he feels your hand wrap around his wrist, a sensation he should be accustomed to but has grown foreign. 

You pull him away from eavesdropping ears, but not from nosey eyes. With how front and center Finnick has made this, you feel like a spectacle, but when haven't you?

“What the hell do you think you’re doing?” You question him in a harsh whisper. “I don’t know what this is or what you think this is, but it is not the place for it. What if this gets back to Snow—”

“I don’t care.”

“—There’s already so much…what?”

“I don’t care.” He shakes his head, and for once, he’s not lying. “I don’t care if they hear us, or—or if this gets back to Snow.”

Your jaw shifts as you narrow your eyes up at him and there’s that anger he’s been expecting.

“Please, Star. Just…just let me speak.” He begs. Your face goes blank, a mask slotting into place like a lock with a key that Finnick has long since lost the right to. He blocks out the chatter around him. 

“Not here.” He thinks he’s being rejected for a moment until you grab his wrist and drag him behind you. The elevators are filling in droves and you just so happen to pick the one housing some of the last people he wants to witness this. 

Haymitch takes one look at your faces and the grip you have on his wrist and raises his hands in defense. 

Haymitch turns to Katniss and Peeta. “Nuh-uh, believe me. You do not wanna be locked in here with them.” He shakes his head and steps out without a backwardsqasz glance and you contemplate going with him. “I’ll meet you guys up there.”

Johanna steps on in his place, elevator doors closing behind her. She looks between the four of you and whistles. Finnick sighs.

“There’s the happy couple.” You glance at Peeta and Katniss because she certainly isn’t talking about the two of you. “You caused quite the stir out there. Why didn’t you tell us you were expecting? We could have thrown you a baby shower.” You sigh through your nose. You don’t even have it in you to intervene in this conversation.

“What the hell is a baby shower—”

“We didn’t know how everyone would take it.” Peeta cuts Katniss off. “We’re already the newest victors. The baby might’ve painted an even bigger target on our backs.” He says without stuttering once.

“That’s a fantastic answer, Peeta.” Johanna crows sarcastically. “Did Haymitch prep you on that one or did you come up with it on your own?”

“No. No, it’s all me.” He assures with a downward smile. It certainly is all him. He’s the mastermind behind all of this, right? Ironically enough, Finnick doubts Katniss had any real part in making this ‘baby scandal’.

Finnick opens his mouth to make a quip but thinks better of it. You’re already aggravated at his presence and he honestly doesn’t want to remind you that he’s here. His only consolation is that you’re still holding his wrist, all five pads of your fingers are searing points on his skin.

Peeta gives you an imploring look, eyebrows raised as if to ask if you’re alright and you nod and—when did that happen?

It’s quiet, with no other sound than the nearly inaudible woosh of the elevator going between floors. No one makes an effort to break the steadily growing awkward silence. Finnick does, however, make the mistake of making eye contact with Johanna. She mouths you’re dead at him over your head and, yeah, that definitely fills him with much-needed confidence. 

Present (X) - Finnick

[21 & 22] -  THE CAPITOL; TRAINING CENTER; ELEVENTH FLOOR

“Alright. You wanted to speak.” Your dress flutters around your legs as you settle into a big green chair. That same giant green chair you sat in three years prior. You’ve both grown considerably since then. Just in two completely different directions. What a juxtaposition. “Speak.” 

He stays where he’s standing a couple of feet away. He probably should have figured out what to do on the elevator ride, but, again, he’s without a plan. “Did you hear my message? When I was up there with Caesar? I know you were still getting ready—did you hear it?”

“I might’ve.” You shrug and cross your arms, still so stubborn. “Great strategy by the way. I’m sure you’ll reel in plenty of sponsors.”

“God, Star, it wasn’t for them. It wasn’t even for the fucking movement.” You raise a brow at his words but give no further outward reaction. He moves to stand before you, each step more unsure than the last. Your glare is scorching, but there’s been enough space between the two of you to house the sun. “Do you remember when you said my poetry was a gift? And—and that I shouldn’t waste it on them? You said you would never be tired of anything I do. Do you remember that night? What I said?” He implores. It was a special night full of promises and you gave him more than he deserved.

You look him over with a critical eye long enough that he’s sure you’re not going to answer. Especially when you turn to stare off to the side before sighing out of your nose.

“My heart, who am I to deprive you of what's yours by right? The air in my lungs, I breathe for you. The blood in my veins pumps for you. A leaf can’t stop itself from falling and neither could I. Everything I do, I do for you.” It only takes him half a second to recognize the lines and he’s stunned, transported back to that garden under the stars. “I remember all of them… I remember everything you’ve made for me.” You give him fleeting peripheral glances and avoid his gaze like you’re ashamed of that. 

He nods, frantic and eager. He’s making headway. He honestly didn’t think you’d let him get this far. Your eyes widen when he drops down onto his knees before you smooth your face into a blank mask. “They’re all yours. And they’ll keep being yours even if you still hate me when I leave this room. Everything I’ve written since I met you has been for you.’’ He confesses, hands moving to grip the arms of your chair, but is it really a confession? The Capitols love his poetry because they adore the idea of Finnick Odair being devoted to them, longing for them and, for that, you’ve always been his muse. 

You stare down at him, giving no indication that anything he’s said has swayed you. He grits his teeth through the sting of rejection and sighs, arms falling to his sides.

“I can’t tell you how sorry—”

“Why now?” You cut him off. “It’s been two years. You don’t owe me anything, Finnick, so if this a guilt thing—”

“I–It’s not. I mean, it is, but it’s not…it’s not why I’m here.” He sits back on his haunches, running a hand through his hair. “We could die tomorrow. And I don’t want you going into that arena thinking that I don’t love you or…or that I wanted to leave you.”

You squint at him, face twisting into a sour scowl.

“You said,” you drawl, slow and drawn out like you’re explaining something fundamental to a child, “you thought it was best if we ended it.”

He shakes his head. “I lied. I had to and I’m sorry, I’m sorry. I know I hurt you and I know saying sorry won’t be enough, but please know sending that letter was the last thing I wanted to do. Leaving you was the last thing I wanted to do.”

“What? What are you talking about? You said—”

He holds his hands up, stopping your completely warranted stream of questions.

“I know. I know what I said and I never would have said it if Snow hadn’t shown up at my house—”

“Snow showed up at your house?” Your arms unfold and you lean forward so suddenly that he almost flinches back. “When?” 

“Uh, a few weeks before I sent the letter. He’s the only reason I even sent it.” He scoffs, remembering the state he was left in after Snow offered the ultimatum. He doesn’t need to try to remember the words written in the letter he sent you because he’s never forgotten. They’re tattooed on the back of his eyelids, seared into his memory every time he blinks.

“What did he want? What did he say to make you…” He watches you try to articulate your confusion. What led to this? What could have possibly been worth giving you up? 

“Snow, he was convinced that our relationship would somehow lead to—to civil unrest. His solution was to get rid of one of us, get rid of you. I couldn’t let that happen. He never explicitly said it, but you know how he is, how he speaks …I was scared. I was. I didn’t—” His voice cracks and you stare down at him with stunned, wide eyes. He wants to shuffle closer. He wants to sway into you and take some kind of comfort. But he doesn’t. “I didn’t know what to do and I couldn’t just tell you because you would have tried to find some kind of loophole and we couldn’t afford to make him more hostile than he already was.”

You look to your left out of the wall-length windows and smirk, completely throwing Finnick off. 

"Star?"

You stand. He watches as you pace the length of the room before turning on your heel and walking onto the balcony. He can do nothing more than follow you. 

“He came to my house too, you know. Around the same time, I think. He wanted to remind me about how privileged I am.” You snort and that sick feeling is developing in his stomach, organs twisting to make room for the settling dread. He isn’t sure what he thought you’d do in light of the revelation, what he expected you to say, but it’s not this. “Went on and on about how thankful I should be that he was allowing us to be in a relationship and…and that as long as I kept myself in line, I could keep you.” You sigh, propping your elbows on the railing and placing your face in your hands.

He doesn’t know what to do. Speechless doesn’t even cover it. His anger is there, and he doesn’t see that ever leaving him...but he’s been angry for so long and tired for even longer.

“We played right into his hand, Finnick. He gained something from this, bastard that he is.” You scoff. You turn and sit with your back against the glass railing. "That's all that matters to him."

Finnick stews on it and many things are starting to make sense. In the months leading up to the event, the two of you started seeing each other less and less—long stretches of time where all he had was your perfume and words to keep him company. And considering Snow was the only way either of you were allowed to come to the Capitol… Of course. It all seems so fucking obvious now.

"I should have known better. Snow was never gonna kill you, he's too fucking—dammit.” He stops and shakes his head. So much lost time, so much pain. All unnecessary in the end.

“Come sit down, Finn.”

Finn. 

He hasn't been called that in a long time. He takes a second to stare unseeingly at the stars before sliding down beside you.

It's quiet. He doesn't know what to say, doesn't know if there's anything he should say, and he's sure you feel the same. But he does know if it was up to you, you'd both sit in silence for the foreseeable future and he has two years' worth of confessions to make. 

“The mo—” he stops, overwhelmed by how much he wants to say, but nothing feels good enough, “I loved you the moment you laughed at my stupid joke the first time we danced together and I have loved you ever since. Even when I wasn’t there to show you, even when I—I left you. I’ve loved you the entire way, Star. There are billions of suns out there, billions of universes, and I love you in every one.”

Your head whips up.

“I remember everything you’ve made for me too.” Your mouth twists, brows furrowing as you stare at him and he can’t express how good it feels to be seen.

"I don’t hate you.” You shrug a shoulder, smiling small and quick. “You said ‘even if you still hate me’, I don’t hate you.”

“...You don’t?” 

“I tried to. For a while, I thought I did." He shouldn’t be surprised by that. He shouldn’t be hurt by something he explicitly told you to do in his letter. Finnick shouldn’t be a lot of things that he is. “But I just…couldn’t." You grimace "I didn’t even want to, after a while. I was just tired.”

His head thumps against the railing. He closes his eyes. There's a question on his tongue, an answer he shouldn't need but wants regardless. 

“Is that why you stopped sending letters?” When he opens his eyes again, he’s relieved that you’re still facing him.

Your face twists like you’ve tasted something sour, something rotten. “I just…I was fine waiting for you, Finnick. It was hard, but it didn’t hurt. Not too bad, at least. I would’ve waited a thousand years because it would have been worth it to hold you for a second. And I could get through that because I knew you were waiting for me too. But, I realized you were never coming. And, eventually, I realized…you weren’t waiting either." You whisper, wrapping your arms around your legs as you pull your knees up. He stiffens, freezing in place as he tries to slow his heartbeat. 

He drops his head, brows furrowed as he tries, and fails, to stop tears from forming. It's just, it's cruel. The one thing he promised himself he'd never do—leave you, hurt you—he had to do for you. 

He wipes his face, pressing the base of his palms into his eyes. 

"Star, I…I would never…It killed me to write that letter, you have to know that, right? Right ?" He implores, voice rough while his breath hitches repeatedly. His throat feels tight and swollen as he stutters over the words in his chest. The words you have to hear, the words he needs you to hear. You stare forward, refusing to look at him anymore and he turns to face you full-on, refusing to look at anything but you. "How can I let you know that? What can I do—to prove—that I'm sorry?"

He thought you both had changed too much to be fluent in what you two used to have. He thought it was a different language, but here, up close, he can see that it’s not so much a new language as it is a cipher. You just had to let him get close enough to understand again. He always thought you had such an open face, it was a wonder to him how you could lie so eloquently when you could never lie to him. But it wasn’t until he was shut out that he realized you were letting him read you, subconsciously or otherwise. He reads you now, eyes tracing your face eagerly—hungrily, and finds…remorse?

"I know you’re sorry. I know. And logically, knowing the truth should make it easier to get over it.” Your mouth opens and closes, hesitating. “But you left me." He nods hard enough to hurt his neck. "I did." And he's sorry, he's sorry, he's so sorry. He doesn't think there's enough air on the planet for him to tell you just how sorry he is. "You left me, Finnick. I know it isn’t rational to feel this way knowing you didn’t want to, but…” You lick your lips, resting your cheek on your knee. When you look up at him, actually look at him and not somewhere over his shoulder, the glossy state of your eyes has him digging his nails into his hands to ground himself. "It’s just—it’s a real challenge to separate you from that hurt." I’d take that hurt from you if I could, he thinks. I’d grit my teeth through the pain and wear it proudly if it meant you’d have a moment of relief. He doesn’t say any of that. Instead, he says, "I'm sorry, Star." Because, really, what else is there to say? There’s no way to describe everything he’s sorry for.

"...I'm sorry too." You say and he wants to tell you there’s nothing to apologize to him about, but you lock your pinky with his and it’s enough to make his throat tighten, and all he can manage is a wistful sigh at the feeling of coming home.

Far below you, the sound of the city is dampened by the distance but no less heard. He goes to speak but spots a flash of blue out of the corner of his eye. It’s your ankle. Or specifically, what’s on your ankle.

“You wore it?” He asks, touching the fraternal twin of his own bracelet. He appraises what he thought was lost reverently. Tracing the grooves of the shells, the divets in the charms, the rough twine of the rope—it all feels like a live wire under his fingers.

“I never took it off.” You slip your heel off, loosening the straps of the bracelet and wiggling it down your foot. “I just thought it might be a little sad to parade it around when you didn’t want me.”

“There will never be a moment on this Earth of me not wanting you, not while I still have air in my lungs. Not even after.” 

“And how’ll you manage that?” You ask, your eyes crinkling in that old mirth you used to wear around him like a beauty mark.

“For you? I’ll find a way.” He promises.

You hum, appraising the jewelry briefly before passing it to him. He smiles when you lift your hand, silently prompting him. He places the bracelet on you, tightening it on your wrist. It feels like muscle memory when he lifts your hand to place a kiss on the center shell.

The corner of your mouth twitches up and you nod. “Okay.”

He leans in, placing a hand on the base of your neck and pulling you towards him and he’s still in awe that you actually let him. He holds the back of your head as you bury your face in his chest, wrapping your arms around his slender waist. 

"I'm not asking for forgiveness, it wouldn’t be fair.” He murmurs into the crown of your hair. “But after we do this, I want the chance to make it up to you." If you'll let him, he'll spend the rest of his life mending what he tore apart.

“I think…I’d like that.” You speak into his chest and he feels your voice more than he hears it. “It was for you too.”

“What was?”

“The song I played onstage. I wrote it after it all happened. I couldn’t touch the violin without thinking of you, Finn. You were the only person I ever wanted to play for.” You whisper and it feels like he’s been punched in the stomach. Finnick’s taken by the sudden need to look in your eyes more than anything, to see and know you and be seen and known in return. He pulls back enough to look down at you.

“Star.” He begs you beseechingly, and there’s no hesitation when you look up at him. He grins. It feels like it’s been years. “There you are.”

You smile. It's small and heavier than he remembers, but it's there and he is as whole as he will ever be.

A/N: IMAGINE POURING YOUR HEART OUT AND EXPRESSING HEARTFELT INTIMACY TO THE LOVE OF YOUR LIFE JUST TO GET DUMPED yeesh. fun fact: "...but if you only dug a little deeper you’d find your picture framed and hanging along the walls of my soul." I actually texted this to my beta reader about Finn from Adventure Time after seeing an edit bc I love him so much, but then I converted it into Finnick love. also, Finnick's letter was one of the first things I wrote for this story months ago. That balcony talk was inspired by Hozier's Unknown/Nth WE IN THE ARENA NEXT CHAPPY

[desertmousy]

hey, howdy. i know i've been m.i.a and that's because i wrote a book, like, an entire book. i know a lot of people here follow me for my fandom stuff, but if you liked my fanfic then you'll probably like my original space opera, too. and i'd love it if you would give it a shot.

Two centuries ago, House Henly of Aurethia and House Volkov of Griea penned an engagement, promising a union between rival houses and their respective homeworlds. Elio Henly has been preparing for marriage his entire life. As the Henly heir and future steward of Aurethia, he will inherit great power, including control of a lucrative trade route, and ownership of the most precious substance in the Greater Universe — Avara. The mysterious blue crystal native to Aurethia is the sole treatment for parsec sickness, an epidemic ravaging space travelers within the Greater Universe. But when he meets Cael Volkov, the charming heir of the outfitted military planet, Griea, everything he thought he knew about his homeworld, his family, and his heart is turned upside down. Cael Volkov has been raised to conquer. Champion in the Tupinaire, commander of the Royal Reserve, and son to the mighty Legatus, Cael knows his mission is simple: gain the Aurethian heir’s trust, learn everything he can about the forest moon, and prepare to take it by force. But the longer he spends with Elio Henly, the quiet, brilliant Aurethian prince, the more he questions everything he was taught, and begins to push back against the rhetoric seeded in him by a lust for vengeance. Aurethia Rising is an Achillean Space Opera with a happily ever after promise. Content warnings are available inside the novel.

if you like arranged marriage, and queernormative worlds, and boys who kiss each other on the mouth, and transmasc princes who get their happy ever afters, and pew pew in space, and also sword fighting in space, and rebellion like star wars, and writing like C.S. Pacat then Aurethia Rising might be for you.

i worked so hard on this. i'm being much more casual over here in than i am on other social media because this is kinda where it all started, y'know? but anyway. yeah. that's my book! buy it, maybe! or just, i don't know, add it on goodreads or make a note or just sigh at it like i do from time to time. idk. it's my heart all bound up in paper.

oh. and no ai touched this, btw. i wrote the book with my own two silly little human hands. the cover is illustrated by h0psynth. chapter headers by marta riva.

[dragon-kazansky]

Spirit of the sea

Izzy Hands x Reader (GN)

You were a member of Blackbeard's crew long ago. Then you became a ghost story. Izzy Hands only sees you in his dreams these days, until he sees you for real when investigating Stede Bonnet. This sets him on a rollercoaster of emotions between you and what his captain is doing.

{Masterlist}

{Previous Chapter} - {Next Chapter}

Warnings: Slight angst. Probably more swearing, this is Izzy here. Longer chapter than the last.

Chapter Three - Can you see me now?

♡♡♡

Izzy had entered his captain's quarters in a slight daze. He was focused on his mission, sure, but the sound of your voice was taking over his mind. It almost felt real.

The way you said his name made his heart skip. Not that he would ever say that out loud. God forbid anyone thought Izzy Hands had gone soft.

He almost believed you had been on that bar.

"Izzy?"

He snaps out of his thoughts at the sound of Blackbeard's voice.

"He's not interested in meeting. I explicitly told him... Blackbeard desired his company."

"But does he know who I am?"

"Seemed to, yeah."

"And still he said no?"

"You can "go suck eggs in hell" was his response, I believe."

"Fascinating."

Once Izzy was dismissed, he walked up onto the deck and looked out to sea. Back on open water where he liked to be. He finds himself pressing his palm against his chest, where the ring sits under his clothes. It feels heavier than normal for some reason.

♡♡♡

Turns out it was the Spanish waiting. Not a private vessel like Stede had thought. You had cursed under your breath as the dingy approached the ship.

It was a set up.

Along with the crew and the Englishman, you were pulled into a line where Stede could see you all being held at sword point.

This was becoming the last straw for you.

"I think there's been a mistake," Stede mutters. He is then promptly stabbed as his crew gasp in shock. Blood soaks his clothes as the sword is pulled out of him. "Did you mean to do that?"

You stand by quietly and watch as Jim is revealed to be a woman in disguise. Apparently Spanish Jackie knew them and wanted their head... or at least nose.

As night draws in the Spanish prepare to hang Stede Bonnet. You look up at him as he stands on the barrel, noose around his neck. You stand there with the notion that you'll never see Blackbeard and Izzy again. This time you'll really be a ghost story to them.

A pain settles in your chest at the thought.

"I'm sorry, guys." Stede says to his crew. "Any last words?"

"Yeah," Jim speaks up. "You are the worst fucking pirate captain in history."

"I deserve that."

The Spanish captain mocks Stede for his last words. As he begins to laugh, he is swiftly swiped off the ship. All hell breaks loose.

Cannon fire. Smoke. Pirates boarding the ship. Yelling. Swords clashing. Several things happen all at once.

In Stede's panic, he knocks the barrel over, hanging from the rope around his neck.

You begin to laugh, tears welling up in your eyes. You know these guys! This crew!

You're cut free from the rope binding your hands and you watch the Spanish die one by one on front of you.

Whether it was fate or luck, you thank your lucky stars. 6 years away from the ship you called home, only to reunite with them on this very night. Your eyes dart from one person to another, looking for the man you missed the most.

As the fog rolls in thicker, Stede is cut down from his hanging, falling limp on the ground. He's looking worse for wear.

You turn at the sound of heavy footsteps. You smile at the sight of your captain.

Blackbeard stands over Stede.

"The Gentlemen Pirate, I presume."

"You've heard of me?"

"Oh yeah, I've heard of you. I've heard all about you."

♡♡♡

"Blackbeard."

He looks up from Stede and sees you standing there in front of his eyes. "No way," he mutters under his breath.

"It's me."

He looks you up and down, taking you in. He has thought Izzy had been a little odd these past few weeks. Now he was connecting the dots.

"No fucking way!"

You smile at him. Blackbeard orders his men to carry Bonnet back onto his ship as he walks toward you and pulls you in close. You finds yourself a little taken off guard, not knowing Blackbeard to be particularly a hugger.

"This is fucking unreal. You're alive?"

"Yeah. Have been all this fucking time!"

He sounds super excited as he holds your by the shoulders and looks you over again.

"Izzy is never going to fucking believe this."

You fall quiet as you look up at your captain.

"How is he?"

"He's, well, ya know, Izzy."

"Captain..."

"I'm sure he will be happy to see you again. We thought you were dead..."

"Almost was," you whisper.

♡♡♡

You climb aboard the Revenge. You had hoped to never set foot on this ship again, hoping you could simply go back to the one you used to call home, but it turns out Blackbeard has a genuine interest in this Gentlemen Pirate.

You go along with him for the sake of returning to your old crew.

"So, I'm allowed back, just like that?"

"You always had a place on my crew. "Dying" isn't going to change that. Just, I need ya to talk to Izzy first. I think that's important. I'm gonna go check in with the Bonnet guy."

"Right..."

Blackbeard leaves your side to go below deck. As you turn around, you see him. Izzy Hands. Just as you remember, though perhaps a few more grey hairs on his head.

He is frozen in place. Eyes set on you, the corner of his lips pulled down, his brows are knitted together. One of his hands rests on his sword at his hip, the other is balled up into a tight fist beside him.

"Izzy," you say his name softly.

You can see his jaw clench, perhaps even his eyes watering. You realise in that moment he doesn't believe what he's seeing. You take a step forward and he takes a step back.

"Izzy..."

"You're not real," he says plainly, trying so hard.

"I am real, Izzy. It's me."

"No. It can't... it can't be you," he nearly loses his composure. "You died. That ship burnt down to nothing and you died."

You take another step closer.

"I jumped off the ship, but got swept up in the ocean. The weather turned bad, do you remember?" He doesn't respond. "I couldn't get back to the ship, and before I knew it you were all gone. You have every right to believe I was dead and that I'm just a figment of your imagination, but I'm here..."

Izzy stares at you for a few moments longer because inhaling sharply and walking off.

You stand there and feel all the shuddering breath escape you. Yeah, he had every right to walk away.

♡♡♡

After sitting with Stede for a while as he recovers, Blackbeard stands up on deck looking out at the horizon. Izzy joins him, his mind busy with thoughts. He has to be going crazy.

"Been lookin' for you everywhere. We need to move quickly before the Spanish realise we massacred all their men."

"Oh, the Spanish. They die quite dramatically, don't they, the Spaniards? Lots of blubbering for their God."

"Yeah, agreed. Now, we really should discuss..."

"Izzy, Izzy, Izzy, Izzy! Did you see them yet?" Blackbeard looks over his shoulder at his first mate. "Our spirit isn't a ghost after all!"

"So I wasn't going mad?" Izzy whispers to himself.

"What's that?"

"Nothin'." Izzy looks out across the sea. His chest feels heavy. So you are real. You really were back from the dead. Where the fuck had you been all this time? Why hadn't you reached out in some way?

"Aren't you glad?" Blackbeard asked.

"Fucking ecstatic."

"Cheer up, Izzy. We're a team again!"

Izzy says nothing as he stares out at the sea. He doesn't know what to feel right now. For the last 6 years he believed you to be dead. You haunted his dreams, his thoughts during the day. He saw you in places he shouldn't. Izzy genuinely thought he was losing his mind at this point.

"Look out there. Those clouds." Blackbeard points out at the sky, trying to change the subject. He could tell the conversation was starting to bother his first mate. "Do they look like frankfurters to you?"

"They look like clouds," Izzy sighs.

"Yes, yes, they look like clouds because they are indeed clouds, but if you just put some fucking imagination into it, man!"

Izzy looks back out at the clouds, completely done with this moment, but humouring his boss nonetheless. "I suppose they do look like sausages."

"Frankfurters, yes! Exactly. It's like pulling teeth with you sometimes, man."

The two of them turn to face the crew of the ship. Most of the crew are milling about, but you're standing against the railing with your arms crossed and bead bowed down. Izzy's gaze is on you for a moment before glancing at the crew.

"What've we got?" Blackbeard asks.

"Well, the ship sustained some damage in the crossfire, and the crew's completely useless, bottom of the barrel."

"Mm, and what about them?" Blackbeard nods over to where you stand.

Izzy bites the inside of his cheek. "Prisoner of Bonnet or something... has been trapped on his ship for weeks according to the others."

"What's the plan?"

"The uszh - make 'em repair the ship, execute 'em." Izzy says this as he avoids looking at you. He is still trying grasp onto the fact you're not dead.

"Right, the uszh."

♡♡♡

Pete looks up from what he is doing to see Blackbeard and Izzy talking quietly to one another. "I bet he's saying something genius. He's history's most brilliant tactician. I wonder if he'll recognise me."

You look up at him. "Recognise you?"

"Yeah. I was on his crew once."

You narrow your eyes at him. "I don't remember you."

"Why would you remember me? Unless you were someone we crossed, but we very rarely left anyone alive."

You push yourself away from the railing and stand in front of him. "You weren't on his crew."

"Oh yeah? How would you know?" He stands up to you.

"Because I was on his crew. Until about 6 years ago I sailed under Blackbeard. I don't ever remember you."

Pete backs down. "You sailed with... him?"

"Yeah. You see those two over there?" You nod toward Blackbeard and Izzy. Pete nods. "They were my friends. My colleagues. My family, if you like. I killed for Blackbeard. Stole for him. Tortured for him."

Pete swallows nervously. Lucius steps between you both. "I thought he would be taller."

You sigh and step back.

Fang and Ivan come over and slap Pete across the head. "Back to work!"

Blackbeard turns back around to see what was happening. "Boys, boys, boys, hey. Let's not brutalise our guests like that."

Blackbeard swings down the steps, even though it was only 4 steps to walk down. The crew applaud him for that anyway.

"Hello everyone. I'm Blackbeard." He greets them.

Izzy comes down the steps you notice him avoiding your gaze. You know you've hurt him by suddenly reappearing in his life.

Blackbeard makes the rounds of the crew. They're fans of him. He seems pretty stoked by the reactions he's getting from them. He turns to find Buttons standing beside you with a seagull on his head.

It dawns on you how little you knew of this crew due to being locked in the brig for weeks. You realise how weird this all is.

"Sorry, sir, Blackbeard, sir, I was just wonderin' if we're going to be able to live or die..." Franchie says.

"Right, come on!" Izzy cuts him off. "Blackbeard has business to attend to! Fang!"

Fang hisses and orders them all to go back to work. You remain standing as Blackbeard and Izzy pass by you. Blackbeard smiled at you, but Izzy pretends not to see you as he steps last you.

You sigh and walk in the other direction.

♡♡♡

"This place is amazing. Izzy, look, look at this shit." Blackbeard gets all excited as he opens a cabinet to find a model of the ship they're on. He's never seen anything like this before.

Izzy sighs as he watches his boss. He was annoyed by the fact that Blackbeard wasn't taking things seriously right now, and it didn't help to know you were basically haunting him even though you were no longer a ghost. He supposed in a sense you still were, to him anyway, a ghost.

Blackbeard holds up the model of the ship. "It's a teeny-tiny version of this ship."

"It appears so, yeah." Izzy takes it from Blackbeard when he hands it over. "So, Edward..."

"He's got all sorts of knick knacks and trinkets."

"Edward?"

"This guy's fucking fascinating!"

"Edward, focus. We need a plan."

"I AM focusing. I'm focusing on all of this brilliant stuff."

"Edward, we really need a plan." Izzy insists.

"Crazy little trinkets."

"Come on, a plan."

"Yes! We always need a fuckin' plan, all right?! And then what? Then we fuckin' execute the plan, then we get another plan, then what do we do? We execute that, and so on and so on, and again, and again, and again, and again! It's all so fucking boring!" Edward shouts.

"Why aren't you focusing on them? Huh? Our friend who came back from the dead and crossed our paths again! Who we thought was dead, but really they were out there all this time probably doing some way more fucking interesting than the same thing over and over again!"

Izzy bites his tongue at that.

"I'm bored outta my skull man. Is this all there is?" Ed asks Izzy, turning to face him. "I shouldn't be bored. I'm fucking Blackbeard."

Izzy stares at his captain.

"Well, as board as you might be, if you don't make a decision soon, we're going to fuckin' die."

Blackbeard looks at his first mate.

"You're doing it again."

"Doin' what?"

"Avoiding talking about them. All you wanna do is talk about what I plan to do. You won't even say their name."

"Edward-"

"Do you hate them, Izzy?"

"Ed-"

"No, Izzy. Do you hate them? Do you despise them for dying?"

"They're not dead though, are they? Never were. They just made us believe they were."

Edward stares at Izzy.

"Huh..."

"What?"

"Now, there's an idea. I haven't done that yet." Edward says curiously. "I haven't died yet, have I? Maybe we should try that." He says, standing right in front of Izzy with a look of excitement in his eyes. He then walks past his first mate to go back outside.

Izzy stands there with the ship model in his hands. "Yeah, cos that make sense."

He puts the model back in the cabinet.

♡♡♡

You sit on the deck with your head leaning back against the railing. The crew are still fixing the ship, but you're lost in your thoughts about Izzy.

Israel Hands was always a hard man. From the moment you net him, he was tough, direct, took shit from no one. He took pride in being Blackbeard's first mate. Being first mate was no joke, it was a huge responsibility to the ship and to the captain. Izzy Hands was perfect for Edward's right hand man.

He was always the same, but it took months of sticking to his side to make him soften up, if only a little bit. Izzy would find himself drawing closer to you. He would always come to stand beside you. Always found himself sharing thoughts and ideas with you. Sometimes he just liked to sit in silence with you.

You became a safe space for him.

Izzy Hands is human, despite what some might think of him. You know deep down he has thoughts and feelings too, he just does a good job of keeping them hidden. You've seen the way he looks at Blackbeard, like he's the most important man in the world. Izzy would do anything Blackbeard asked him. Even bend the fucking knee if he had to.

You liked Izzy. As much of a bastard as he was. There was a connection there, it might be hard to see, but you knew it was there. It was the things Izzy did that proved it's existence.

Now he hated you.

You should have made more of an effort to contact hi somehow, but even then you don't know how you would have managed that.

"Shit..." You sigh.

In the corner of your eye you see Izzy comes outside. You keeps your eyes away from him. If he was going to ignore you, you would ignore him too.

Izzy joins Buttons where they see ships approaching on the Horizon.

"These wee black dots look a bit Spanish to me. What do you think?" Buttons says.

Izzy looks through his telescope. "Fuck!" He hurries down the steps muttering to himself as he goes to find Edward.

You watch him go, immediately breaking your ignoring him attempt.

♡♡♡

Izzy can't find Ed. He's not on deck by looks of it, and he wasn't in the captain's quarters when he went in to check. Izzy is losing his patience right now. He sighs and heads back outside to make sure the crew are still working, and to see if Edward has appeared in the time he was gone.

Instead Izzy just finds himself staring at you. You've been sitting in the same position for the last hour. He would yell at you for being lazy, but that would mean talking to you, and that was the last thing he wanted to do.

However, as your eyes rise from the wooden deck to meet his, Izzy finds himself frozen once again. Those are the same eyes he used to look into back then. You're right there in front of him.

In his state of being thrown back to the past, he had failed to notice the crew of this lousy ship had gone from deck. He blinks and realises how quiet it is. He takes note of you looking at him. You open your mouth to say something, but he walks away immediately.

He won't talk to you.

♡♡♡

The crew are below deck eating and arguing over Jim. They seem to believe Jim is a mermaid, but they stands up and yell at the crew, stating they are not, in fact, a mermaid. Neither are they bad luck.

Izzy is not impressed.

"You don't get food when you're being invaded." He states to them, unhappy with how things are going. "You live at my pleasure! Back to work! Useless fuckin' fuckers!"

He storms off again.

When he returns to deck be finds you fixing the ship. You've picked up where they have left off. You haven't noticed him standing there silently watching you as you work away.

Izzy hates the way he feels right now, seeing you there in front of him. You're behaving like you haven't been gone for 6 fucking years of his life.

"You don't have to do that," he says, trying to remain neutral.

You don't look up from what you're doing, continuing to hammer the nail.

"As I gather, you were their prisoner. They ain't your crew."

You shrug. "Ed said I always had a place on his crew, but right now I don't feel like I belong on either. This weirdos, well, I don't know much about them. I know they're not very good pirates, that's for sure. As far Blackbeard... it's been 6 years. A lot has changed. I've probably changed."

Izzy watches you. You refuse to look at him.

"You haven't changed... much."

You stop hammering the nail, but you keep your eyes focused on the deck as you tilt your head in his direction slightly.

"Thought you were dead."

"Yeah..." You say softly. "Figured as much. Heard the stories. Ya know, pirates believe I'm some ghost who died on that ship that day, seeking revenge on anyone who gets close to the wreck. I apparently haunt the water waiting for the day Blackbeard returns so I can rest in peace. I mean, who the fuck made that story up?"

Izzy doesn't laugh, but he is mildly amused by the tale. "Some arsehole, probably."

You chuckle. "Probably."

At last you bring your eyes to meet his as you stand. You look at him with a sigh. "I'm sorry you thought I was dead. But I had no way to contact you or let you know I got off that ship that day."

Izzy says nothing.

"I thought about you every day," you confess. "You and the guys. I wondered if you ever looked for me."

"Uh..." Izzy drops his gaze.

"I get it... you thought I was dead. No point in looking for a dead person at sea."

Izzy looks back up at you. "Did you ever once look for us?" He asks.

"Every fucking day. For the record, Blackbeard isn't easy to find."

Izzy almost smiles, but the sound of the door opening behind him has him frowning again and turning around. The crew of the Revenge are coming back to finish their work.

Izzy doesn't look at you again as he watches them, making sure they don't slack off again. You decide to finish the job you started.

Izzy only glances your way when he knows you've stopped looking.

♡♡♡

You knew what you were seeing, but you weren't sure what to make of it. Right in front of everyone was Blackbeard in a white frilly shirt, sleeves covering his hands. He was waving his arms about in some strange dancing motion. His expression was very serious though.

You thought perhaps you had hit your head and were imagining things, but when Stede Bonnet comes out wearing Blackbeard's iconic leather outfit, you decided you must have been drugged instead.

Izzy has to walk off and you don't blame him. The man has put up with a lot from Blackbeard over the years, and this had to be taking the cake.

While the crew play along with this strange charade, minus you who wanted nothing to do with any of this weird cosplaying thing, Izzy pulled Ed to the side to have a word with him.

You see them standing in the door. Izzy is obviously irritated with Ed. When you see Izzy giving Ed two middle fingers, you know that he has reached his tether.

Izzy marches out and grabs Stede by the collar. He drags Stede down below deck. No longer able to stand by, you follow him.

"How quickly can we move this vessel?" Izzy asks Stede.

"I'm not sure. That's really the crew's thing."

"How are you stocked for munitions?" Izzy asks him, grabbing him by the jacket again.

As you and Ed enter, Stede looks up. "Ed! Do you know this guy? He's a complete asshole!"

"Ivan! Fang! Prepare the guns. Execute anyone who won't fight." Izzy orders.

"Well, Blackbeard... what do you think?" Ed asks Stede, getting closer. You dare to move closer to where Izzy stands.

"Do you concur?"

"Me?" Stede asks him.

Realisation sinks in for you.

"You wanted to be Blackbeard. This is what it's like." Ed tells him.

"We could just talk to them."

"OK, yes, and do you speak Spanish?" Ed asks.

"No."

You sigh softly. Stede was about to learn what it meant to be an actual pirate.

Lucius comes in counting down from 20. You looked at him in slight confusion, but the look he gives Ed means this is something they understand. It dawns you he was counting down the time before the Spanish grew closer.

"Time is almost up. What are you going to do?"

"What?" Stede panics.

"They're on us now. Time for a new idea, Stede. The crew's going to die."

"I don't have an idea!"

"Hurry, you're going to lose all your men. It's all going to be your fault. All of the men who trusted you..."

"I don't know!"

"Their blood's going to be on your hands. It's going to be your fault!"

"I don't know!" Stede says again.

All you can do is stand there and hope someone has a fucking plan. You did not plan on actually dying today. You glance at Izzy, but he's just watching this back and forth interaction between the two men.

You'd never get to apologise properly to him.

"Time's up!" Lucius screams.

"I don't know what to do!" Stede yells.

"Death it is," Blackbeard says. "But wait..."

"You're a genius, Blackbeard!" Pete comes in grinning.

You let out the breath you were holding. You should have known there was a plan all along. You feel your muscles relax. You don't see the way Izzy looks over at you discreetly from where he stands.

Upon returning to deck you see the ship is surrounded by heavy fog. You could hardly see a thing outside the deck.

"I don't believe it," Izzy says.

"No one will see us in this," Fang speaks up.

"This is why you do not doubt Captain Blackbeard!" Ivan calls out.

"You knew this would happen?" Stede asks. "How?"

Ed takes a seat. "Quite simple, really. The colour of this morning's sky coupled with the brisk westerly wind made me think we'd be safe. And then the shape of the clouds confirmed it."

"Frankfurters," Izzy mutters. "Fuck me."

"Izzy, I figured the fog would set in once the sea cooled around dusk."

"'Cept we're right in their path. They'll run snack into us," Buttons says.

"Correct! On any other day, for it's September 2nd and tonight's a full moon. So life anchor, and let the ocean current drift us into the warm embrace of safety."

You can't deny that was clever thinking, but the way Izzy glances you makes you realise something is wrong. You ask him with a silent tilt of your head what the matter is, bit he just looks back up at Edward.

"Ed, Ed, it's September 1st, boss."

"What's that, mate?"

"It's September 1st."

"Dickfuck, no, it's not."

"He's right. It's the first," Lucius conform. "The full moon's tomorrow."

"It's a leap year." Ed sighs.

"Does that change things much?" Stede asks.

"Yeah. We're goners. Those of you who can swim would be wise to do it now."

The crew start asking questions, worried.

"Where are you going?" Stede asks.

"The Captain goes down with the ship. I'm going to get pissed."

Stede goes to follow Edward.

All you can do is look at Izzy. He's not looking at you, once again. You want to say something to him, but he walks away before you can utter a word. You sigh.

Fang comes over to you. "He missed you, ya know."

You look up at him. "Izzy?"

"Yeah. He probably won't appreciate me tellin' ya this, but I'm sure I'd heard him crying in his cabin most nights after the incident..."

You turn to look at where Izzy stands, staring out into the foggy sea.

"I can never make it up to him for making him believe I was dead..."

Fang places a hand on your shoudler. "Sure, you can."

Fang leaves you alone with your thoughts. You keep your eyes on Izzy and take a shake breath. That bastard will never understand how much you missed him.

♡♡♡

@grippleback-galaxy - @askmarinaandothers - @godlikegallagher - @for-fuck-sake-im-alive - @whiskeyswriting - @lxsm2 - @bloody-bunni666 -

[snoopledrooplecheesedoodle]

Day Two: Decorating Cookies: Sucre (OC)

I missed day one but fuck it I will post some winter shit I have too this one is on my OC Sucre. My posts will be inconsistent, I will not apologize. You may request a character from the fandoms I like or one of my ocs (Cat cafe, Sins, and Sucre) I will eat it up if you give me a new character idea.

TW: cannibalism, Sucre being delusional, threats of love potion, reader trying to pacify a maniac, forced affection and feeding, forced drugging

Warm and delicious smells of spices and sugar weave their way throughout the kitchen, teasing you with their aroma. Reminding you of simpler times and baking with loved ones.

Now you wanted to vomit.

The monster who claimed you to be their "sweetheart" was humming Christmas tunes cheerfully as they skipped around the kitchen. You were tied lovingly to a chair with a big red ribbon. A cute little present for the deranged witch.

"Oh sweetheart you'll just love what I'm making, my easy yet scrumptious sugar cookies! Remember when I baked them for you before we eloped?" The pinkette teased as they placed a sweet kiss to your cheek.

Sucre...the cute store owner you had crushed on, the embodiment of sugar and spice. Skin the color of milk chocolate, long pink locks that shone like saltwater taffy, and butterscotch-colored eyes. They looked just as delicious as the treats they prepared for you. You used to feel your heartbeat speed up when they looked at you so sweetly.

However, like their treats their appearance was deceiving. Sucre killed your friends either morphing them into soulless candy minions or into sweet treats they served in their candy shop. Sick twisting of your stomach as you remember Sucre shoving friend flavored fudge down your throat (you cried as you couldn't even taste the human that it once was). Hot tears pool in your eyes as you remember their tortured screams and the magic user's maniacal laughter.

"Oh darling why so glum such saltiness ruins your sweet face." Sucre drags their tan fingers and bubblegum pink nails to collect the single tear streaking down your face. You shiver in disgust as they bring the finger to their mouth and suck on it like a lollipop.

"Perfect as usual." Lovesick expression took over the beautiful face in front of you. Handsome features wasted on such a horrible monster. Sucre continues to flit around their kitchen grabbing cookie cutters and turn to you, marshmallow teeth gleaming.

"Sweetness would you like me to use the Santa cookie cutter or the reindeer cookie cutter?" You glare at the willfully ignorant person in front of you and spit at them. "I want to go home." Sucre giggles putting down the cookie cutters, before wrapping their arms around you. "Silly goose, you know you're already home! We could make a gingerbread house if you stop being such a Grinch." You scream and kick revolted by the candy man's touch. "Fuck you and fuck Christmas, I never asked for this!"

Sucre's stupid mouth stops spewing stupid bullshit for once, their body stilling. You're too distraught to care about the now magenta pair of eyes looking at you. "Mon chéri you're being so sour, you know how I don't like sour people." You don't care what's the worse they can do, kill you?

"If you hate me so much then get rid of me like the other people you killed." The magenta swirling in their eyes got worse as their expression twisted. "I would never hurt you, how dare you compare yourself to those dégoûtant." Angry tears fall down Sucre's face as the witch shakes you harshly. You went to bite the hand who force feeds you, causing Sucre to retreat with a wounded expression.

"Chéri why must you be so difficult...I just want to love you, why can't you let me do that?!" Sucre had officially gone off the deep end again. They pull a candy out of their pocket and unwrap the sweet.

"I've been so lonely for so long, longer than you'd ever know." Sucre's eyes swirl with madness like spun sugar. You push yourself as far back into your seat as you can. "I could have drugged you in the start, forced you to love me." They push further into your space expression unreadable. You twist your head to escape what this madman would do next.

"(Y/N) look at me." You snap your head back in shock of Sucre using anything but their pet names. This gave Sucre enough time to shove the sweet into your mouth. You begin thrashing when you felt its sweetness melt on your tongue, attempting to spit the offending item out of your mouth. Your attempt is thwarted as Sucre covers your mouth and pinches your nose shut.

"Stop sugar I won't let you breath until you swallow." The lack of air made you struggle further. You can't let them win you need to get out. Sucre's intense gaze your only sight as you flounder for air. The crazy bitch was trying to kill you, and you knew it.

Struggling made you lose air faster as you slowed your struggling, choking behind your captor's hand. You swallow unintentionally, the sweet going down the wrong pipe.

Sucre lets you go as you cough painfully hot pink salvia spilling from your mouth as Sucre's toffee eyes return and stare nervously at you. The world blurs from the tears forming in the corners of your eyes once more. Out of pain and sadness in knowing you lost.

Aching warmth filled you as strong arms embrace you; you stare at your savior with awe. Sucre looked so different in the light and did they always have such a chiseled chest. The witch looks like a kicked puppy staring down at you while cradling you in their arms.

"Chéri, are you okay? I knew I shouldn't have forced you, but I couldn't help it I-" Sucre is cut off by your lips connecting with theirs in a messy desperate kiss. Their lips tasted so sweet as you deepen the kiss. The witch comes back to their senses when you bite their lip causing them to moan. They also began to kiss you as voraciously as you did them. Your tongue pried open their lips as your tongue snaked around theirs desperate to taste every part of their mouth. The only noises were the wet mouth noises and Sucre's breathy moans.

When you pull away, you look at Sucre with a single emotion in your eyes: hunger. The poor frazzled witch flushed so deeply as their love drunk expression met your own. "That was wonderful darling, I wish you'd be this forward more often." You grip the front of their frilled shirt and stare intensely. "I want reindeer cookies and then I want you."

Sucre giggles as they untie you, you then proceed to tackle them with another passionate kiss.

You both found something very sweet in each other's arms~

So much for cookies am I right? I may have rushed but you should definitely enjoy!

chéri: Sweetheart

dégoûtant: Disgusting, gross, revolting

[astrok1dz]

❤️ Glad you’re back! ❤️

I can’t remember your request guidelines rn so I’m gonna play it safe. Coddling and complimenting Eddie? 👀

RRRAHHHH THAT WAS QUICK!!!!!!! ALR, YES. Eddie needs to be spoiled and just. so much attention. I am very much willing to give that to him. that being said

cw: Eddie being traumatized (duh), a bit of angst, a dash of relationship issues, dw they fix it, happy ending, fluff

Never Too Much

-----

okay so bc of Eddie's past, we know he most probably has a lot of trouble getting into relationships, let alone romantic ones.

so when he met you, and obsessed over you, of course, he felt so lucky he could even breathe the same air as you

but nothing good ever lasts for him, everything is ripped away from him by this god forsaken city. he tries not to get too attached (and fails miserably) so he's shy for longer than he should be.

he's just trying to be prepared for when you'll leave him.

he's absolutely surprised when you don't

he doesn't say anything, of course, but he's just utterly confused

how? how didn't you leave him? all this city had taught him was how he wasn't good enough, how he was different, and how different people, people like him, don't get anything nice. don't deserve anything nice.

you notice this. you always do. it's not hard to tell when he's overthinking. he'll stop and take deep breaths or immerse himself in puzzles, but you're working on communication

you decide to start coddling Edward. to spoil him a little bit.

it doesn't even have to be something big, he'll be grateful for whatever you give him, although he doesn't quite know how to tell you or thank you properly

Eddie hadn't been your Eddie for the last two weeks or so, consumed with work and his plans to cleanse the city. He hadn't had the energy to be quite romantic or intimate lately, so things had been a little colder than usual. It hurt. Did he not love you?

One day you realized your mistake. Eddie? Your Eddie worshipped you. Sure, he could have his bad moments and want some time to himself, but after all the neglect and abuse he'd lived, he probably wanted to be coddled. He just was too embarrassed to ask you to do it. No wonder things had been like this. It was your turn to take the lead.

Now you knew, and you decided to take matters into your own hands. For the last couple of weeks you had been thinking of little ways to make him feel better, and today would finally be the day when you unleashed them all onto little unsuspecting Edward.

You hear the creak and slam of the door to your apartment. In comes Edward's tumbling silhouette, shuffling around to plop down on the couch next to you. Your sweet boy, all tired from work, all tired from this city. He always was.

"Eddie! Oh honey I missed you so much...", you coo, and his heart melts, because although he knows you adore him, he's used to having his absence not quite matter.

He's silent as he shuffles a little closer to you, and you immediately receive him with open arms and an inviting hug.

"Tough day?", you ask, and he nods. You do as well, and hold his shoulders.

"I got a little surprise for you, c'mon, follow me", you tell him. He looks at you, eyebrows knitted in confusion. You help him get up and slowly peel off his jacket, take his hand, and lead him to your bathroom.

He doesn't even get to see what it is before a sweet aroma invades his nostrils. Your tiny bathroom, adorned with scented candles, bubbles and rose petals floating on your tiny tub (if you could call it that).

What?

He looks at you, confused. Why would you do this? Why you, such an angelic being, the antithesis of this dirty city, do this for him, a broken man?

"I- you didn't-", he starts.

"I didn't have to, I know. But you've been so stressed lately and I wanted to help you relax...", you explain kindly. You start shredding your clothes, ready to enter the tub with him. You extend your hand to him, and he feels as if he's being dragged to the pearly gates of heaven.

"Besides, I've been missing you so much... I wanted you all to myself a lil' bit...", you say, and ignore the sting in your eyes. You really did miss him so so much...

"You can have me all to yourself whenever you want (Y/n)...", he stutters out, feeling guilty.

"Oh...", you let out. There he was, so kind, so sweet to you, so unapologetically yours.

"Well, in that case...", you say, almost seductively, but cover up a little once again when you remember your appearance. You were so busy planning this whole thing for today, you hadn't even shaved, you hadn't taken care of yourself. It felt overwhelming. What if your appearance ruined this whole things for him?

"Shit- I didn't- I forgot to- Sorry-"

He stares at you, but his eyes sparkle and his round face is flushed as if this was the first time he's ever seen you (which you both know is not the case).

"You know I don't care about those things. I want to see you...", he says, taking your hand. He looks at you, eyes full of adoration. His hands make their way to your waist and caress it gently, bringing you closer. He leaves a chaste kiss on your lips.

A few happy tears escape your eyes. There he was, the Eddie you've been missing. You help him undress, hands sliding lovingly over every inch of skin you know he's not fond of. Eddie. Your Eddie, so soft and round and most of all, so gentle.

You both get in the tub, cuddled up together. You don't even need to say a word. You both occasionally ask each other questions regarding doubts or insecurities, and reassure each other. When you're both satisfied with each other's answers you share the silence, snuggled up.

"You're so pretty, Eddie... my baby..."

He shivers, and you keep going.

"I love you, Eddie. You're kind and so so sweet. You deserve this, Eddie"

You notice by the way he shakes that now it's his turn to cry, happy cry, of course.

"My baby, you're so strong... You're safe here, you're okay. I love you Eddie, I'll never leave you". You coo.

He sobs, feeling free to break down in your presence. You kiss his tears away.

"Th-Thank you... you're too good to me... you do too much...", he hiccups.

"Oh, but don't you get it, Eddie? It's never too much", you reply, and for the first time, he begins to believe it.

[crownprincecody]

WIP Wednesday

It's been months since I've written anything at all, let alone for the ship that I adore. But, today I woke up with inspiration and - to prove I've returned from my hermit like existence in a deep cave somewhere - I thought I'd share a little something.

So, without further ado, I present a small rough snippet of an upcoming fic in my original Senator Obi-Wan series.

"How can you be so calm?" Padmé hissed out of the corner of her mouth, eyes following the team of bounty hunters holding them hostage.

"I've been kidnapped eight times," Obi-Wan replied softly, standing in the midst of his fellow hostages as serenely as anyone ever had.

If anyone had a right to serenity amidst abduction it was Obi-Wan. He held the record for the most kidnappings - attempted or otherwise - among the cohort of Republic Senators - past and present. Yes, it was true that four of his kidnappings technically didn't count, as the would-be kidnappers were thwarted in their efforts before they left Coruscant and once before the kidnapper had so much as said halt. But the principle remained nonetheless.

He had been the victim of so many attempted kidnappings that it was practically routine to him now.

Distantly, Obi-Wan realised that ought to worry him more than it did. But, there were more pressing matters to concern him. Like the squad of heavily armed mercenaries currently keeping them hostage. And the severe glare Commander Fox would give him when he realised how much danger Obi-Wan had found himself in this time.

Somehow, he felt that maintaining that this was demonstrably not his fault was not going to buy him any favours with the crotchety commander.

"This isn't a kidnapping," Bail whispered, moving ever so slightly closer to them. "We're being held hostage."

Obi-Wan inclined his head fractionally, conceding his point. "Which makes this distinctly easier for our rescuers. They already know where we are."

Riyo Chuchi sidled closer to them, her eyes impossibly wide as she took in the scene unfolding in the Senate building atrium. "And the squad of heavily armed mercenaries between us and rescue?"

Obi-Wan hummed softly, understanding Senator Chuchi's point. Still, he smiled; heavily armed mercenaries were nothing in the face of what was coming for them. "Padmé has friends in the Jedi Order. I was a part of the Jedi Order, and-" Obi-Wan's tone softened impossibly, fully aware how besotted he was. "Cody's here on leave."

And his dear Commander was going to be very displeased when he realised Obi-Wan was being held hostage.

Obi-Wan pitied the unfortunate lifeforms who made the mistake of accepting this job.

"Two Jedi with reputations for insanity, one marshall commander who has a reputation for being prepared to destroy Coruscant to find you, and as many of his brothers as the Commander can rustle up," Chuchi shuddered elegantly, a smile hiding about her lips. "How much chaos can one Senate building contain?"

"It doesn't have to contain it," Obi-Wan murmured, watching the nearest mercenary with wary eyes. "Not for long, at any rate. With Anakin and Cody both involved, we should be free in time for the next debate."

Bail's mouth pulled down in an unhappy frown. "Maybe we can hold out a little longer."

Obi-Wan bit back a chuckle. He hadn't particularly been looking forward to the upcoming Senate debate either.

"No talking!"

Obi-Wan favoured the masked mercenary with a baleful glare. "We're politicians," he reminded him, as if that pertinent fact could have slipped his mind. "All we do is talk. You'll have to forgive us for following our natural inclinations."

Bail sighed, quietly despairing. "Obi-Wan, I don't want to explain to Cody why it was necessary for the mercenaries to shoot you."