#I've seen the clip I don't think he is against him but I dont think stressing about it is healthy and will change anything | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

j0eyj0rdis0n · 1 year

Note

HEYYYYY i just wanted to say i love ur work <3 and secondly

i wanted to ask if you’ve seen the a24 movie pearl (2022)? cuz like i had a creepypasta request idea based of a pearl scene😭 it’s where toby gives fem-reader like stockholm syndrome and she becomes really clingy to him. And so one day he tells her that he’s gonna be right back and reader starts overthinking and assuming that he’s leaving her forever. AND THENNN she says the infamous pearl lines “NO! WHY ARE YOU LEAVING ME IF I DIDNT DO ANYTHING WRONG! I DONT UNDERSTAND I THOUGHT YOU LIKED ME!!!!”.

then they have a huge fight to which it turns into reader trying to hurt toby and toby just calming her down in anyway tehe :3

Hey love! I unfortunately haven't seen the movie as I'm not really one for movies at all, but I've certainly seen this clip circling on TikTok. It was super intriguing and it made me want to see it but I just haven't had the chance. For not seeing the movie I hope that this is at least somewhat accurate! Thank you for the ask!

Also I have some works ready for Kinktober! I only picked some of the prompts, I’ll start on day 6 so get ready!!

WHY ARE YOU LEAVING ME?! - "TICCI" TOBY

"Y/N I'll be back s-soon. Ma-asky has been in a s-shit mood 'bout this mission." Toby grumbled as he tied his boots.

"What..?" You looked up at him quickly from the dishes you were washing. "Why are you leaving me...?"

"Y/N, it's j-just for a m-mission." He sighed, realizing that this would be coming the longer he kept you here with him alone. "P-promise it won't be long."

The look of confusion and hurt on your face was evident. He hated it when you got upset like this. How was he supposed to explain any further that it was only a short mission? He felt like he couldn't ever explain anything to you. It was starting to get rather irritating too.

"You don't want to stay with me?" You questioned, your tone slowly growing angry. Your hands letting a plate clatter to the counter.

"Don't st-start with that. I told you! A sh-short mission!" His tone began to match yours, with a rough twang of anger. He tied his boots up with white knuckles before standing up and glaring at you.

"Don't leave me!!" You screamed, not bothering to wipe your wet hands off as you grabbed his wrist. "Why don't you love me?! I haven't done anything wrong!! Why do you keep leaving?!" Your voice grew hoarse as you screamed louder, practically begging for him to stay. "Toby please! Please don't leave!" You tried to pull his hand from the doorknob with tears streaming down your face.

"L-let go Y/N! I have t-to go!" He shouted back, ripping his arm from your grasp and throwing the door open.

"NO! NO! DON'T LEAVE ME!" You cried, watching him walk out in a huff.

You ran after him, kicking up dirt with each long stride. You grabbed onto his shirt, trying to drag him back inside. "Please Toby! Please I need you!"

He shrugged off your advances, continuing down the dirt road. If he wanted you for himself so badly then why was he leaving?! They had more than enough manpower to get missions done without him. You could barely survive without him! How dare he leave you like this! His pace didn't stop you from continuing your chase. Picking up a hatchet leaning against the picket fence you ran with rage in your eyes and anger in your heart.

"You're not leaving!!" You shouted, bringing the hatchet above your head, ready to swing at him.

He turned quickly, dodging your swing and wrestling the hatchet out of your small hands. "What on e-earth do you think y-you're doing?!" He shouted, throwing the hatchet far into the dirt as he got up in your face. "You're going to k-k-kill me for trying ta' leave? What the f-fuck is your problem!?" He took a moment to pause, staring you down with a look that could probably kill. "Get the f-fuck inside. Now."

When you didn't respond to his words, he grabbed your wrist with enough force to shatter it completely, dragging you towards the house. He threw you on the couch, pointing an accusing finger at you as he continued his yelling spree.

"I do all this for y-y-you! Be fuckin' grateful!"

It was only when he saw tears spring to your eyes that he went quiet. Yes he was upset you were making such a big deal out of one short mission, but he wasn't upset enough to make you cry from yelling at you. He let out a defeated sigh, taking a seat next to you on the old couch.

"S-sorry... I shouldn't have y-yelled... You gotta k-know missions aren't optional... I really gotta go Y/N..."

You sat defeated, tears streaming down your face. You hated it when he left, and no amount of reassurance made you feel better. Every time he left, you felt a piece of your heart break.

All you could do was nod, letting him stand without protest. Toby gave you a gentle kiss on the forehead before heading out the door once more.

#creepypasta #creepypasta headcannons #creepypasta requests #creepypasta hcs #ticci toby headcanons #ticci toby x reader #ticci toby creepypasta #ticci toby #toby rodgers #anon ask #asks open

136 notes · View notes

tubbytarchia · 6 months

Text

I've been thinking about fWhip/Jimmy even though I've barely put in any effort to look for Whimmy content and just gotten notable videos/clips from other people, because I thought it probably had good cute material and I could redeem it for myself. And I'm so sorry to all fWhimmy shippers out there but my stance is basically the same as with (mostly traffic and some other SMPs, but not all) Flower Husbands. Which is to say it makes me feel pained for Jimmy lol. If you happen to be a fWhimmy shipper who's already put off then for the love of god you don't have to keep reading but anyway

Most of this is because of Legacy and Empires S2 but hh okay the whole deal about nobody taking Jimmy seriously on E2 ever, right, so when his deputy (fWhip) also fails him, and Jimmy in all his seriousness expresses his disappointment, and fWhip immediately kisses him in response upon Sausage's encouragement to do so????? And Jimmy lacks any good or defensive retort and then fWhip also starts shooting him as Jimmy's leaving because yeah sure why not!! I know to a lot of people this is probably funny and quirky but to me this is once again Jimmy's current feelings and seriousness being completely disregarded again like "omg shut up little cute guy and kiss me already" vibes (negative). Like I cannot begin to express how fucked this response is... Similar to when he made signs arguing against Jimmy's decision to fire him and it included stuff like "you're disrespecting yourself. You can do better babe" like jesus christ is Jimmy really nothing more to you. And another clip where Jimmy gives fWhip a kiss and fWhip INSTANTLY hits him with his hammer thing like why were you so quick to do that. And also why did you do that at all lol wow Im so sorry I think the more I look the worse it gets. Sorry fWhimmy shippers I dont think I can save myself from this hell

I'm sure they're way better than this in some other SMPs but as far as they go as a ship uhhh this is all I've gotten. Their appeal is that Jimmy tries to be serious but no one takes him as such including fWhip who just finds it adorable, and that Jimmy likes to be insulted by him...? This is what I've gathered and, obligatory: I'm not here to police anyone, I dont care, only expressing my personal thoughts from what I've seen because I'm genuinely intrigued about anything Jimmy related. In E2 fWhip just ends up feeding into the bit of making a fool of Jimmy and it hurts me the same as it has with all the other members driving this bit into the ground. Jimmy having trusted him and then having to fire him meanwhile fWhip is acting like... the way that he is, just makes it so much worse for me uwaa. And I obviously have seen very little of E2 but Jimmy is almost always so polite if not hesitant even when he tries to be scary and take revenge etc. (Eg when he was unfairly being doused in lava in Legacy, he STILL hesitated to stop that and as such made a very poor attempt to break out of his cage even when he was in totally full right to do so because that was bs. And his entire villain arc in E2). That and he always gives such love to any one of his partners, only for people like fWhip to be relentlessly mean and never return the sentiment to a point where it'd make for anything mutual... I think I need to see season 1 of Empires or something. There's got to be stuff there. There's got to be something. There's got to be some genuine mutually cute ship potential for this somewhere that isn't just them being buds. Although I think fWhimmy is too far gone for me. Pensive

#blabber

13 notes · View notes

doodlegirl1998 · 1 year

Note

Hi. So I was thinking about Izu and his love interests and how some ladies (plus Shig) fit the bill.

Mei? Cool design. Has passion for her craft and has show to care for Izu (she is the one to upgrade his costume)

Melissa? Cool design too. Quirkless and badass and have great chemistry with Izu, love the clips of them together.

Shig?😏 the canon (forehead kiss and skimo kiss)

Nejire? Great design. They had a cute moment (Zuzu is not a perv. He is a real gentleman) and while it was one scene and many HCs her as gay or queer...this ship has potential(or had to) she is a strong student who has a powerful quirk and she and Izu could bond over this( I know how we dont know much about her life but still...I think they could be a cute ship)

Toga? Great design, srsly I love her design. She did ask him out ....in the middle of the war and has almost to no interaction to him but I feel this ship could work in aus.

Also Toga now knows what he considers a dream date...and while the internet mocks him. I found sweet.

So yeah those ladies (plus Shig😏) are winning against Ochako. Hell, Lady Nagant (yes too old for him) has a more positive interaction with him and Fox Lady too.

Ochako...not winning here. 😞😔

Hi @mikeellee 👋

To be honest all those ships could work, as you noted, Hori even added Shigadeku crumbs, both in their parallels and in the artwork with how close he draws them. (Just like he did with Togachacko.) Shig has gotten closer to getting a kiss from Izu than Ochaco! Who is the love interest here? If I didn't read the series, with how Hori draws them together, I would think it's Shig. Come on Hori!

Now to address the other ships you mentioned:

IzuMei - It would be a cute ship as you mentioned. She's quirky and unafraid to express it. I feel like being with Mei would help Izu gain confidence. Whereas I think being with Izuku would help Mei socialise with others.

IzuMelissa - It's been a while since I've seen the movie but I also thought they were cute together. Plus her being quirkless as well gives them a common ground.

IzuNejire - Not a ship I had thought of for Izuku but I respect your opinion there.

IzuToga - A ship that has a tonne of potential and under a different writer (who fleshed Toga out more as a tragic villain battling her blood urges rather than flip flopping between this and blood yandere) this could have really flourished.

The shame is IzuOcha had a tonne of potential to be awesome but Hori squanders it. Here's what I would change;

1) Have her inspire Izuku's hero name 'Dekiru' - It would be the beginning of a sweet deep moment between them.

2) Don't have her call Izuku plain. I found this to be a strange thing for Hori to have Izu's future love interest say particularly as her character design is more 'ordinary' and Izuku's appearance hasn't changed between now and then so why does she suddenly find him physically attractive?

3) Give her story focus rather than all the ungodly focus on Bkg. As well as build up her parallels with Toga. Build on why she thinks she can't express her feelings; a fear of losing his friendship? Something inspired by Aizawa's poor teaching? Just give this girl anything, Hori.

4) Have her stand up against Bkg's plan to have 1A vs Izuku. I hated this moment in MHA so much. If Ochaco needed to have a BAMF moment where she stood up to someone for Izuku it should have been against Bkg not the civilians rightfully worried about their safety but Hori wastes her and this ships potential...

#mha critical #bnha critical #anti bakugou katsuki #anti bakugou

28 notes · View notes

pitbullwithaship · 8 months

Text

DOCTOR WHO LIVEBLOG 2009 SPECIAL THE END OF TIME (PART 2)

Okay I'm emotionally prepared for this definitely.

Why does it always have to happen on Christmas?

Destruction of Gallifrey? Hello Time Lords?

Ooh a sensible lady time lord

Okay so she's dead then that's a shame

Earth. We are very important

I'd like to not be important actually

Bondage

Aww he'd be proud if he was his dad I love Wilf

Oh no Donna

Oh poor Donna

Oh no Donna!!!

Oh good she's asleep

That's gay

Poor Master

I'm sorry this is incredibly homoerotic

Baby Master

4 beats. 4 beats like we have 2 beats oh that's so cool it's the heartbeat I just realized how cool that is

4 beats 4 knocks wow wow wow this is cool

That's cacti, that's racist

I mean it might be the worst rescue ever, but it's not quite the worst rescue possible

I love Wilf

Good point indeed I like these alien people

Anything nothing

Flimflam oh Wilf

Yeah blimey

THEY DID IT! THEY DID IT ON PURPOSE!!

Diamond gem thingy!

White point star I've heard of that

Creak creak

It's the lady! Why is she there! How is she there!

Thank you for ominously predicting this lady

Aww is this the cute scene I've seen?

He's so sadwetpathetic

AWW GIANTS HES SO SAD AND TRAGIC AND BROKEN

HED BE PROUD IF HE WAS HIS DAD AAAAHHHH I LOVE HIM I LOVE THEM

He's so sadpatheticguiltytragicsad

Nobody should live so long it's true

Oh Wilf oh Wilf I'm gonna cry

The Time Lords are Returning!!!

No it doesn't seem to be good after all

That's giving coruscant council vibes

Nostalgia tinted stories

OHyes

ALLONS-Y omg my dude

This is mildly star wars

THEY GET TURNED INTO WEEPING ANGELS WHAT SERIOUSLY ARE ALL THE WEEPING ANGELS TIME LORDS IS THAT HOW THEY SEND PEOPLE BACK

He jumped okay it's good he landed face first or he probably would have died immediately

He can undo it with his gauntlet thingy!?

Okay that's gonna screw up gravity and everything

Go Wilf!!

Oh wow this is chaos

Oh no Wilf

The gates of hell are open

HE HAS THE GUN

Okay who's he gonna shoot please stop switching its freaking me out

ITS THE LADY SHES A TIMELORD WHO VOTED AGAINST I THINK IVE HEARD THATS HIS MOTHER MAYBE?

HE SHOT THE DIAMOND

MASTER HELLO!

Bye bye Gallifrey

Yes my dude you are still alive

Maybe you should use your aliveness to process your trauma, if your aliveness lasts

HE KNOCKED FOUR TIMES WAS THAT WILF IN THE BOX

IT IS WILF IN THE BOX

Okay so either he dies or wilf dies cuz someone has to be in there right? Is that's what's happening

Dude dude don't lash out process your trauma

Yeah he's amazing my guy

Stop calling people unimportant your brain is broken and that's why you have an ego

Okay trauma meltdown time

He's already made his choice, that's why he's freaking out

Oh Doctor I knew it

Oh Wilf

Okay he absorbed it that's fun

He's regenerating then

Aww hug

Oh hello Donna

Awww

She's smiling lol

He'll see him again

HELLO MARTHA WHATS UP WITH YOU

HELLO MICKEY HOW ARE YOU ALSO

THEYRE MARRIED YAY

HELLO DOCTOR YAY FOR SAVING THEM

HEY ITS SARAH JANES SON AWW HE'S SAYING GOODBYE

Why though they all know he can regenerate he can pop in and say hi after though I suppose he won't be exactly the same person but he can still have the biggest family in the world

HI JACK OF COURSE YOURE AT A BAR

IS IT ALONSO FROM THE CHRISTMAS SPECIAL IT IS

Lol helps him get a guy as his last goodbye

OMG ITS JOANS GRANDAUGHTER OMG OMG CAMEOS AFTER CAMEOS FINAL GOODBYES

This is so cute

DONNAS WEDDING YAY HE WENT TO SEE IT

This is so cute he went to say goodbye at her wedding and to Wilf even though she doesn't remember him

Awww he got Donna a present from her dad!!

This is so bittersweet amazing and cute and sad and amazing aaaaaagghh

HES SAYING GOODBYE TO ROSE TOO ITS THIS CLIP OMG

welcome to 2005 Rose

YES SHES GONNA HAVE AN AMAZING YEAR A FANTASTIC YEAR A BRILLIANT YEAR

I love that he said goodbye to her too even if she doesn't know that

Oh poor Doctor

Hi Ood!! Aw they're gonna sing

That's gorgeous singing

Hey the adventure starts and ends with singing

Oh poor doctor

I DONT WANT TO GO AAAAAHHHHHHHH

Wow EXPLOSION

Hello Matt Smith!!!

That's a big crash

That was a damn amazing ending he said goodbye and everything aaahhh emotions okay

#doctor who #liveblogging #david tennant #tenth doctor #the end of time #matt smith #11th doctor

4 notes · View notes

altruistic-meme · 2 years

Note

im kinda surprised i dont see many people talking about the police lights that are visible when august is looking in the mirror, what do you think about it?

hi!! so ik what your talking about

this clip and the other here where there's the lights (I couldn't get a screenshot where you could see the lights in the other clip) the thing is that idk if they're police lights ? I'm pretty sure they're from a party, actually!

example here (though I don't know if it's this party specifically) where there are flashing red/ blue lights as well:

someone else mentioned this in a post as well, and August can be seen sitting at a party in these same clothes

so that's why I don't THINK it's actually police lights

BUT, with that in mind, if it IS police lights:

Theory #1: i feel like there may be a connected reason here

in the mentioned post, they also talk about how they think this is the same party where the rowing logo gets set on fire. maybe it's something to do with that? maybe the fire got out of control and emergency services were called. in which case the mirror scene would potentially be happening after the party scene, and it would be August putting his "game face" on to seem in-control while talking to the authorities (picked up from the way he schools his expression into the smile)

Theory #2: August is getting caught for having done... something.

I don't think it's about releasing the sex tape, because I feel like the queen has got that covered up entirely.

However, I've been thinking a lot about the small scene we got where Wilhelm is being taken out of class and told he's being removed from Hillerska. It's just very interesting to me that Wilhelm is being accused as the one who called and issued threats against the monarchy (?!?) and how he seems kind of confused about what they mean when they tell him this.

So while I think it may be pretty unlikely given August's clear guilt we've seen so far, it had entered my mind that maybe someone else had called from Wilhelm's phone to issue those threats. So I'm not saying I think August did that but it's not outside the realm of possibilities. ESPECIALLY if August thought it may get Wilhelm taken out of Hillerska. We already know Wilhelm is making August's life miserable there so him wanting to find a way to get away from Wilhelm makes sense.

So keeping this possibility in mind, this could potentially be August being caught facing threatened the monarchy. And while it was a more quiet affair when they believe Wilhelm did it, he's the Crown Prince and it was probably seen more as an act of rebellion and an internal issue. Whereas August doing it, it would be considered a true threat because while he's related, he's not PART of the monarchy. So he's treated like anyone else who would do something like that.

Making this the scene where August is arrested, and I think he knows what's coming and why and he's trying to go down easy. He knows he's been caught, so there's no use fighting it. So he'll go with a smile, even if it hurts.

So yeah these are my 2 thoughts on that if they do happen to be police lights :] there are a million possibilities, of course since we don't know what happens yet, who does what, any reason there may be police involved, or still even if they ARE police lights or not! I'm so so excited to find out, and I hope you enjoy the wild theories until we learn!

#young royals #yr s2 spoilers #this was super fun to think about #i also hadnt put much thought into them being police lights either bc i do still think they're party lights #(maybe just timed intentionally in the clips to only be red/ blue to mislead us ?)#but i HAD been entertaining the idea about the threat to the monarchy but hadn't had much reason to give the role to August #but yeah this all made me really go 'huh actually it DOES kinda make sense for it to be August'#so!! thank you for that!!!!#i hope you enjoy reading my crazy thoughts eheh #young royals analysis #august of årnäs #askers #anon #shh ac #young royals season 2 spoilers #young royals s2 spoilers #yr s2 predictions

27 notes · View notes

escortingsecrets · 2 months

Note

A, C, H and K for the meme!

A-Z Ask Meme | Accepting

A - Ships that you currently like a lot. (They don’t have to be OTPs because not everyone has OTPs.) Friendships, pairings, threesomes, etc. are allowed.

OTPs I have a lot. Tsengru is the top one and always will be. Love those two so much.

I do love Rufus/Reno and Tseng/Rude as well though. Very cute dynamics for both of those, and Tseng/Rude also has some softer stuff to them that when I started to write them I didn't expect! Definitely one of my favourite and hands down would write it with someone again in a heartbeat. Im a Shinra fucker through and through.

Friendship wise I LOVE Aerith and Tseng. Just a sibling relationship with Tseng being like a big brother in a way, since he's watching over Aerith so much growing up. Its so fuckin cute and also has a lot of angst potential which is also good.

C - A ship you have never liked and probably never will.

I've never been a big Vincent/Lucrecia fan, and never will be. Both of their characters are well written; despite my own biases against Lucrecia, I can see the appeal of it. But they wouldn't mesh well together, with all their issues I don't think. From what I can see between them, it wouldn't be a good pairing from either side.

H - What is your favorite source text for fandom stuff (e.g., TV shows, movies, books, anime, Western animation, etc.)?

I dont have one? I like all of them. Books I can flip to what I need to find after Ive read it, and I can jot things down about small paragraphs people might not have seen. I can watch clips and parts of movies on loop (I did this to try and see Tsengs ID number in Advent Children that scene is burned into my BRAIN). So I'll go with whatever medium I vibe with, if that makes sense?

K - What character has your favorite development arc/the best development arc?

If it's ones I've written development for? Tseng. Hands down my favourite muse with his development. He has a LOT to him and I adore his character in canon just as much.

Overall, I give it to Kuja. Favourite FF villian when I was growing up, and favourite now. Love the drama king.

#ask meme #everyone has secrets [answered]

1 note · View note

sailorhyunjinz · 3 years

Note

I also wanted somewhere to go about the whole chan thing rn so I hope u don't mind luv,

apparently he's currently underfire for "making a joke out of Jim crow" which if anyone reading this doesn't know is an extremely racist era in American history where laws were made specifically against black people, as well as they were portrayed as a very offensive character (that's Jim crow, the character, his name is also used to represent the discriminatory laws)

the only proof I've seen being shared around is him dancing to "this is america" by childish Gambino in which he makes this pose

but with a thumbs up instead of a gun, the pose itself is in reference to a popular portraying of the Jim crow character

https://youtu.be/VNtA_0BR6Pw you can see the clip people are referencing here at 6:35

now i tried to keep the background info section of this unbiased,, but in my opinion he did it literally as the pose that's in the music video, not with Ill intent; which in my head doesn't make it racist. however people online are treating it as if he deliberately was laughing at or making fun of Jim crow laws or the character in some way. personally as a poc I see nothing wrong with it, but I also just feel like people love bringing up things from years ago to start drama during comeback season? don't get me wrong, holding people accountable is great, but 1) this was in 2018, 2) from what I've seen they've issued a general apology for this type of thing on insta**, and 3) idols are still infact people, and people that live literally on the other side of the world at that. I Don't wanna play the "they didn't know" card but it's always a possibility that they genuinely didn't know or understand that it was bad. I don't see chan doing anything disrespectful in that manner anytime recently, assuming he's understood now that it's not something he should be doing and adjusting his behavior. if it was a current issue that he's still making these mistakes I'd be in full support of the mass emails and mass bubble messages and everything else, I do support calling out idols when they're in the wrong, but I feel like sometimes people take it way farther than it needs to, almost as if they're looking for a reason to cancel people.

I really don't understand why it's being made into as big of a deal as it is, and I wish people would stop and think "would this really be helpful right now or am I doing this because someone on Twitter told me to" before inflating severity like this.

** I can't put a ss of the apology rn cause ya bitch got anger issues and deleted Twitter insta and tiktok bc its 4am and this situation is very literally the only thing I see on all of my feeds.

thank you for such an informative ask. im obviously not gonna sit here and defend chan because he did do something wrong and it did offend people. when we dont know about certain things and we see them in media its not odd that we copy behaviours or things we've seen and that doesnt mean i justify such behaviour but its a different reality when you have been raised in a korean culture where poc rights have only been discussed the last 10 years which is a shame but sadly true.

im just happy to know that he wants to be held accountable for his behaviour if he accidentally does/says something that can cause any misconceptions. that in my mind doesnt sound like a person that would deliberately do something in order to offend someone but rather a person that is willing to learn from their mistakes and learn more about other cultures and life experiences.

#fluffybitch0325 #Cherrymail🍒

16 notes · View notes

pokefanbri · 4 years

Text

https://www.facebook.com/104057744428568/posts/156998459134496/?sfnsn=mo&d=n&vh=e

Fucking told him its a huge red flag if someone doesn't get rid of their apps. Multiple apps. Smh 😠 "oh yea i don't use them anymore" proceeds to use fb dating app" for real come on bro!

Some comments of the post:

"If you have to be checking up on your Partner then you shouldn't be with that person.. Idk how people have time for all this .. love yourself and know your worth.."

"If you're in a serious committed exclusive relationship you should not be on tinder. That's how I met my fiance and as soon as we said we are gf and bf and exclusive we both deleted it. Honestly if I was her I would have broken up with him too"

"a person also has a right to trust their gut feeling and check things out if something's not feeling right. Knowledge is power"

I've already discussed this but this news clip further validates my point of the topic, nothing more. I could call him out on hs bs further with detail, but I won't....yet, out of respect even though he probably doesn't deserve it. Til he reaches me & apologizes for everything he's done, i can say whatever tf I want & i could make a whole damn list.

Its the events of this what happened that started our downfall to begin with cuz i didn't trust him & he didn't even try to gain it back just left it as is when I could've turned my back right then & there, no apology either. Didnt apologize much actually, not even when i last saw him. But from then we spiraled & he got bored of me. I wasn't giving him what he wanted in whatever way & he wanted to find more. Closed himself off from the beginning & that created his boredom 😒

Would've had a blast together like a normal fucking couple if he was less closed off, & wouldn't have felt the need to do shit behind my back.

I'll stop talking about it for now, I have the anger & urge to keep going but I wont...actually no Screw it im pissed 😡 but ill keep it light. Its just not fair, I did so much for him but I was disrespected in different aspects of the whole relationship. Fuck! I've talked about the positives alot cuz i do love him..but the negatives are such bs too.

I want a good ass sincere apology for all of it so I can forgive him & move on, ive already apologized myself even though I dont think I should have to 😒. Didnt even give me a straight answer for the breakup, it was always a different excuse when I know he just wanted to pursue other women without me around im not fucking stupid. His own toxicity was too much even for himself & I was in the line of fire, to where i was the toxic one? No fuck that its unacceptable, he always lied when it came to covering his own ass.

For all i know he's watching me squirm & taking pleasure in all the pain I'm going through over him cuz he likes the attention. But no I actually don't think so on that one he's still good & ill give him credit where its due. But I gave him all the attention he wanted/needed & still wanted more from someone else. Really dude fucking really!?

Man up & own up to your mistakes, speak to me where I can actually hear ur voice speaking back to me with sincerity. We'll apologize together. Yea ull be pissed about this, but after u get over it & calm down. Give in & call me, granted when ur ready, & open up for once in your damn reserved life. Itll help us both with more closure & may even take a weight off our shoulders if we just talk it out, no arguing...since we're done there's no point anyway..a friendly non judgment zone cuz idc, i won't think of u any less.

U confused me during & especially after the relationship cuz i didnt know who u really were, i know the good cuz that's what u allowed me to see, ive accepted the bad that I knew already & from what ive learned...i accepted u regardless.

I always forgave u & not cuz im passive, cuz forgiveness is what the Bible teaches.. ive forgiven u & myself the best i could especially with the last things ive showed u, (accept this part cuz im pissed rn & standing up for myself, ill delete eventually maybe if u ask cuz nobody wants to be seen any less of a person. but I can make it alot worse, calling me the mistake was the worst thing u ever said to me & pointing out your faults so u can be better throughout the relationship was my only toxicity to u) we actually never really fought except the 1 time, just argued a tiny bit rarely about little things.

Ive tried using every ounce of my courage to show u how much im sorry for any wrong ive done. but its up to u now to make things right. U know me, ive always said that u can talk to me about anything. I want to be able to trust again & move on whilst staying friends. What else do u have to lose, might even have a great heart to heart convo dude to dudet

Everything ive ever said up to this point lies all my Questions. But here's most of the list, we both were equally in control of the relationship. Maybe u didn't want me to? But doing everything I had to for myself & the household, what u & ur parents wanted of me & just me being me cuz i had to, u had your own part to play & did provide...but did u actually not want me to cater to u if it were a sign u were lazy or something? Like did u not feel worthy of me? What is it u think is my "addicting personality" that isn't fixable on the surface? What is it really that u didnt like about me? This is why i don't have closure, u left me like this, confused as well as wanting more since u held back so much. Was that on purpose to give me even more false hope & want me to pine over u? Did u ever or do u still, love me at all? What did u want from me & out of the relationship, what was the purpose of it from ur perspective & why do u think i couldn't give that to u? What did i lack that u felt compelled to not tell me so I could improve & vise versa so we both could improve? Why wouldn't u allow me to help u become a better man when (I shouldnt have to btw), its exactly what u wanted but maybe didnt see it? Do u realize your own faults even as u do them? Lol. Like i genuinely want to know as much as the good ive seen, cuz to be better the more open of a person u are the more u understand yourself too.

Unless claiming u want to be a better man is part of ur alluring charm in love bombing process to land a caring girl on purpose lol...god I hope not, that would just mean u rinse & repeat like a for real narcissist 🤔 seriously tho look into that im not even kidding, im asking cuz i care. Im pissed now but 1 thing is that im trying to not put ur behavior against u cuz maybe u can't help it, its just the way u are, all ive seen & experienced points to maybe 50% of u lol. Ive always suspected narcissism, a real psych problem that might be worth looking into. But yea 1 of the reasons especially why im so forgiving & trying not to put it against u, why i still care despite u being a dick lol. I chose to look past it, all the time & up to now cuz I understand what its like to have psychological ailments. The worst part about it is most dont realize it, so i encourage u to do some research & self reflection & admitting it to urself are the 1st steps. Okay? There's different kinds & levels to being 1 too, i found that fascinating. bryan is definitely a different type, ur more lighter than that...definitely not the worst which is the physical harm type. Trust me its worth finding out more about yourself, just dont use it to ur advantage in a bad way but i trust u to do right & grow. Not sure a discarded supply (ie me) has ever tried telling a narcy what they might be for the benefit of their own self awareness 🤔,idk if its ever been done, but theres a 1st for everything? U can find alot on it in quora digest alone but Google is also ur friend.

You always were worth every effort of mine to help u in any way to be happy, & i was most happy when u were. U mean alot to me still, its the effect u had on me, I was under ur spell lol its hard to rid myself of it still, not sure when it'll pass. I chose to see it as a gift rather than a curse, that ur effect on me is still so strong when I shouldn't give a damn. If u really are a narcy, then I understand & don't put alot against u cuz its just the way u are & i need to accept it, but if it somehow helps u to help yourself cuz of it, then whats the harm? But, even in doing this or having my socials public for u...maybe just feeds into what u want...i still dont care, I want u to see how bad or good im doing without u in my life, so u know im okay at least. U promised friendship, least I can do is allow u to keep tabs on me too we spoke of, on my end of things.

The 18th of June was the last time i saw u. It'll soon be a month ago in about a week & a 1/2 & your birthday would mark 2 months. Cant believe we couldn't even last through to that 😔

Mark my words playa I will be contacting u on that day lol. Can't ghost your homie forever sweetie

0 notes