#It's bad but I haven't slept much soo..

[kpopscatterbrain]

Kdramas i've watched this year

Some of these are older dramas but i'm a procrastinator

Black Knight (2023): Loved this one! I have watched it probably 5 times now. Kim Woobin kicking ass is all i need!

Under the Queen's Umbrella (2022): I didn't watch this when it aired (no idea why). I was worried that the plot would be overrun by romance but thankfully i was wrong. Loved Kim Hye-Soo's performance (i cried a little).

Island seasons 1 & 2 (2022-2023): Honestly i only started this one for Kim Nam-Gil. I loved the cast, but the flow of the plot was a little off (don't know how, i can't put a finger on it). Was positively suprised by Cha Eun-Woo's acting, i think he needs more roles like this! Hot villain alert no.1! Sung Joon as a bad guy is either a blessing or a curse. Cgi could have been better.

Taxi Driver season 2 (2023): Loved the first season so of course i had to watch the second one. Love Lee Je-Hoon. Love the main characters. Love the plot and the message of this drama. A masterpiece. Waiting for season 3.

Weak Hero Class 1 (2022): Only heard of this drama wayyy after it aired (thanks tiktok) and god does it deserve every award there is! I was a bit hesitant because Park Ji-Hoon was the main lead, but boy was i wrong because his talent got me speechless (weren't we all). I cried, i cheered, i shadowboxed, i cried a little more and in the end i called my therapist. Thankfully season 2 is coming.

Bloodhounds (2023): Woo Do-whan and Lee Sang-Yi in the same drama beating people up? Yes please! The plot wasn't mindblowing, but sometimes just simple ass kicking is enough. Bromance was bromancing. Park Sung-Woong with another great villain character.

Revenant (2023): After dropping Mr.Sunshine i wanted to see Kim Tae-ri in other dramas, so when this aired i gave it a go. Her range is phenomenal! I have only seen couple spookier dramas, so i made a mistake and watched this at night (slept with the lights on). The eerie vibes and plot twists were well made. Hong Kyung had great chemistry with Kim Tae-ri and his cop role was refreshing to see after his performance in Weak Hero Class (if you know you know).

Flower of Evil (2020): Okay, this is one of the dramas i procrastinated hard on. It's been sitting on my "have to watch" list since it aired and i'm the only one to blame (i hype up a drama in my mind, then don't want to watch it because now i'm afraid it doesn't go the way i think it does and then i get disappointed blaablaablaa). This year i finally got over myself and why. didn't. i. watch. it. sooner!!!! It is all i ever wanted in a kdrama. 1. serial killers 2. a psychopath (but is he really?) w/ an effed up childhood 3. mindgames 4. marriage problems (but has a lot of soft & cute scenes) 5. Lee Joon-Gi. Also as a plus (hot villain alert no.2) the bad guy is kindaa (i'm sane i swear). I would be lying if i didn't say that i found the wife slightly annoying (might be me, but she went too much back & forth and sometimes i had to take a breather while watching), but all in all this drama will be hard to top and i fell in love with Lee Joon-Gi.

Moving (2023): Honestly one of the best dramas of the year. I don't usually really go for plots that have a lot of romance in them (if you haven't noticed), but i found this one to be really well balanced and the romance scenes weren't "cringy". Although Bong-Seok and Hui-Soo were great and had great chemistry, i looooved the background stories of the parents. Park Hee-Soon also pops up as kind of a non-villain villain. I hope there is a season 2.

Song of the Bandits (2023): Kim Nam-Gil again. 1920s Korea and gunslingers... what more could i need? After Mr. Sunshine left me with a disappointment (this might be an unpopular opinion) i craved for a drama set around the same time period, but with a little less romance (i know, i am defective). I think dramas should explore this time period more, but i understand it might still be a touchy subject. The skills of the cast were obviously great, Kim Nam-Gil killed his role like always, but Lee Ho-Jung as Eon-Nyeon shined with her performance (i am now a new fan). Hot villain alert no.3! I have seen Lee Hyun-Wook in Remarriage & Desires and seeing him as a villain made me feel things. If there isn't a second season i will cry.

The Killing Vote (2023): A "serial killer" in a dog mask making the public vote on punishing criminals and everyone suspects each other? Cyber crime? Chemistry between two cops? Major hot villain (no.4)? Sign me up. I love when crime dramas make you question your people reading skills (i have the tism so i really got none) and have all kinds of theories flying around. I liked that even Kim Mu-Chan and Joo Hyun had obvious chemistry between them it didn't overshadow the main point of the plot. I liked Seo Young-Joo's delivery and i hope he gets more bigger roles. Kim Kwon.... why does the psychopath have to be hot? He also needs more bigger roles. !spoiler! Also Park Sung-Woong killing (heh) yet another morally grey character.

The Worst of Evil (2023): Okay, first of all i have to say... the wife ruined everything (some agree and some don't). We get another bromance duo of the year with Wi Ha-Joon and Ji Chang-Wook. Loved the crime organization infiltration plot, heavily despised the romance plot (sorry Bibi baby). I was constantly on the edge of my seat and the characters started to get so morally grey that in the end everyone needs group therapy. Action scenes were chefs kiss. A honorable mention goes for Lee Shin-Ki as Seo Jong-Ryul (or Chief Seo, knife guy, the man has many names) and Bibi for her performance as Lee Hae-Ryeon.

Evilive (2023): Heavily underrated. Kim Young-Kwang doing what he does best, playing a psychopath. This combined with a bromance plot with the one and only bromance master Shin Ha-Kyun? I'm sold. The dramas literal title "villain story" really sums up the plot. Sometimes you are not sure who to cheer for. Sometimes you are not really sure about your own sanity. But to be fair, so aren't the main characters.

Vigilante (2023): Love it. Currently re-watching it. Needs more attention. Needs more episodes. I'm in love with Nam Joo-Hyuk. The best crime drama of the year, the title is all i needed to hear. Beating up criminals in well made action scenes is my favorite genre. No romance. One sided bromance? Morally grey characters (am i repeating myself now?). Yoon Ji-Tae as a beefy cop and Lee Joon-Hyuk as a slightly insane admirer? If we don't get a season 2 i will start a riot.

[atopearth]

Piofiore: Episodio 1926 Part 5 - Dante Falzone Route

I swear the first CG of every route is always the best one. Lili in that dress with Dante protecting her is soo beautiful! Anyway, I always hate the higher ups in the Falzone family, they're so annoying to everyone and give no constructive feedback, they just whine😪 I'm excited to see Raul interact with Nicola and Dante though! Excuse me??? Little Dante snuggling with a cat is the most adorable thing ever!! Is Teo like stalking Lili? He's everywhere lol! Anyway, it's nice to see Lili and Dante fight. I feel like they haven't had time to talk much at all so it's understandable that they would both get annoyed at the other since they both dance around each other not wanting the other to worry all the time. One thing I have been enjoying is how Henri has been seeing Dante for who he is rather than as the Falzone boss.

The purge was quite interesting, especially since apparently there was one that was done years ago when people kept trying to assassinate Dante and he was forced to. Not surprised Raul's parents were a part of the traitors back then. I guess I am disappointed at how weak these other Falzone executives are though. On the other hand, it's cute seeing Dante want to spend as much time with Lili and tell her how important she is to him and how she motivates him everyday with her smile haha. Nicola treating Lili as a sister and her treating him as a brother is so cute! It's so nice how their love for Dante connects them and I'm glad Nicola trusts her now haha. I feel sorry for Henri. He knows it's unreasonable to hate on Dante for his father, Silvio's actions, but now that Silvio is dead, who can he direct his hatred towards? He loved his sister, Chloe, but her life was forced to bend to her role as the Key Maiden without allowing her to live a life of her own, and when she thought that Silvio wouldn't abandon her considering they're "fated" and that he most likely slept with her, he didn't even think about choosing her. It must have been so cruel and terrible for Henri to see his sister change because of "love" and be ruined because of it, and even end up dying for it. I'm glad that Silvio truly loved Dante's mother, Beatrice though, because that's what I felt from the flashbacks. He was still an ass for how he treated people before he met her, but I guess at least Dante can at least believe in Silvio's love for his mother and his family?

Gil and Dante punching each other like children was cuter than I expected. It's nice to see that in this world of mafia, Gil and Dante actually really like each other and want to try their best to not hurt each other and their families. Honestly, I do feel bad that Teo's life sucked, and as usual, it was all because of the church! No one has happy memories of this church so everyone should just destroy it lol. Anyway, considering how much he had to suffer and Lili is the only thing alive that exists from his 'past' before all the torture and brainwashing, it can't be helped that he would direct his hatred towards her. In a way, he's similar to Henri. However, unlike with Henri, I sympathise and empathise with him much less and honestly fail to care for him as much as I would like to. I'm glad Henri is here to tell Teo that if Lili never existed, he wouldn't have even been adopted and had these happy memories of his. It annoys me that Henri had to die though, that was cruel. As for the tragic ending, I know that Lili's death was supposed to be like a shock at the last minute, but I found it so silly that with his last breath, the thing Gil would want to do is kill Lili when he wasn't even that into doing this whole killing thing. As for the other bad endings, it's honestly so petty of Teo to keep killing Lili without even talking to her.

Overall, in terms of being a villain, Teo was very disappointing. I won't say it wasn't understandable because to be basically tortured and brainwashed your whole life after having your nice adopted family killed for being the parents of the Key Maiden is pretty terrible and I'm sure him witnessing it as a kid must have traumatised him pretty badly. But as a Dante said, just because Lili doesn't show it doesn't mean she was always happy and never suffered. She suffered never knowing if she had a family, getting kidnapped, and living a life she had no control of either. Anyway, I liked Henri's role in the story because he's definitely much more fleshed out and understandable especially his agony with himself and the Falzone for causing his sister's death, but unable to find a way to deal with this hatred. I think it would have been more interesting to explore that rather than Teo tbh. As for the romance, it's nice to see Lili and Dante communicating much more honestly with each other, but it's just crappy that Dante was always so busy haha. Personally, it was cute but at the same time bland when coupled with the boring Raul and other executives trying to overthrow Dante, but I did like Dante showing a bit more of his decisiveness as a mafia boss, but really too soft and kind in the end. It wasn't a bad route and was better than the original, but honestly not much to say.

[captawesomesauce]

Thoughts at 11am..

I can't seem to get going this week.

Eating, concentrating, working on things, even going out, or waking up... is just too much.

But why is it too much? That's the weird part....

I don't HURT more than usual... not enough that it makes me not want to do things.

I don't feel BAD or SAD or anything... I'm pretty upbeat and feel good in that regards.

I don't feel TIRED ... in fact I've slept pretty well the last couple of nights and mornings.

And I'm trying to make sense of it all... but listening to voices in an online class is like nails on a chalkboard. Going out to places just makes me feel exhausted before I even get dressed. Eating and cooking just makes me feel like I just don't have the energy to pay attention, to do all the movement, to concentrate...

Huh... I think that's it right there.

Concentrating on anything seems to be really difficult right now. Like I feel fine, but to concentrate is just... really difficult.

I think if I didn't have to drive or pay attention when we go out, I'd feel fine going out. Same with cooking and eating... like I ended up just having a sandwich late last night just because anything more than that just felt like "too much."

My headaches haven't changed at all, but the left side of my head has been wonky... my left eyelid flutters like crazy soo much, my cheek twitches sometimes, and the charlie horses under my chin and jaw have been hurting like hell.

And for some reason, that has sapped all of my ability to focus or want to focus or concentrate to the point where just laying in bed is top for me.

Being sick sucks.... being chronically sick sucks chronically....

[the-sweetheart-chronicles]

.˖˳·˖ ִֶָ .˖˳·˖ ִֶָ .˖˳·˖ ִֶָ .˖˳·˖ ִֶָ .˖˳·˖ ִֶָ 𖹭 ִֶָ˖·˳˖. ִֶָ˖·˳˖. ִֶָ˖·˳˖. ִֶָ˖·˳˖. ִֶָ˖·˳˖. ִֶָ˖·˳˖.

5/25-5/27

It was a long weekend for memorial day, I did get it off paid so that's amazing. It was just what I needed after I super long week. I thought it was going to get a ton of things done but I didn't. I didn't do anything I just laid in bed, slept and watched YouTube. I did re discover smosh this weekend, like I always knew they were a thing still but I didn't really watch them. I found them again and it's really been bitter sweet, I haven't laughed this hard a YouTube video in so long, I love their videos. It's also a weird feeling realizing the YouTubers you watched as a kid are growing with you, the smosh grew up with us. It's really crazy to think about. I do really think I needed the rest, I slept sooo much it's crazy. I went out twice once to Samsclub and once to Walmart. I did brainstorm some ideas for my room, cause I'm gonna be soo real right now. My room is a fucking mess, not even a mess at this point a straight up fucking disaster. I think I let it get so bad because I want to move out so bad. I am starting to realize that even tho I want to escape it doesn't mean I need to live like this. I am gonna clean up, and order some peel and stick tiles for my desk. It's really old and 2nd hand I got it for 15 bucks at a thrift store and the wood is all damaged and has cracks. I am hoping to cover it with peel and stick tile to be easier to clean. My goal is to slowly clean my room, if I leave my room I am taking at least one piece of trash. Look I know it's not a lot but I am really trying here so it's progress. I am ready to see where this week takes me I have high hopes.

.˖˳·˖ ִֶָ .˖˳·˖ ִֶָ .˖˳·˖ ִֶָ .˖˳·˖ ִֶָ .˖˳·˖ ִֶָ 𖹭 ִֶָ˖·˳˖. ִֶָ˖·˳˖. ִֶָ˖·˳˖. ִֶָ˖·˳˖. ִֶָ˖·˳˖. ִֶָ˖·˳˖.

[dma-dima]

Faradima (Part 1)

(Right okay folks I have no idea if anyone will want to read this, but I’ve decided to start writing a little series about the growing relationship between DiMA and Faraday. I’m treating it as canon for this character as I play him, but that doesn’t mean I’m not open to roleplaying him in other relationships in the future. Any romantic relationships which develop through rp will simply be considered AU from the main day to day story I’m creating for him. This was inspired by a little interaction with @scarletthearts. I hope any faradima shippers will like what I’m doing with these two science boys. Under the cut for length.)

Soft light spills through the ragged curtains which wave in the gentle breeze, chirping birdsong carrying from the forest. The fresh mountain air ruffles the messy mop of hair that is the only visible part of Faraday when DiMA comes to check in on him. The scientist snores softly, undisturbed by a burst of loud cheering outside as someone, probably Chase, scores another touchdown. DiMA lowers a tray laden with pancakes and syrup along with a steaming mug of herbal tea down on the bedside table, and smiles as he notices Faraday turning slightly towards it in his sleep, drawn by the appetising scents. He carefully adjusts the blankets which have gotten tangled around his friends legs during the night from his fevered tossing and turning before he gently calls his name. “Faraday.. I brought you something to eat if you're hungry. Rise and shine.” He kept his voice low and soft, only just above a whisper. When the snoring continued he stifled a laugh and gently prodded his shoulder instead. The scientist groaned, batting his hand away, but his growling stomach chose that moment to make itself heard and it woke him. Yawning, he blinked the crust of sleep out of his eyes then focussed in on his visitor. “What'sa time?” He slurred, stretching and wincing when a badly knotted muscle in his neck twinged painfully. “How long was I out?” “It's a little past midday, and no don't look at me like that, I never actually agreed to wake you early today. A shrug does not a yes make my dear Faraday.” The scientist (who's eyes had flown open with alarm once he'd heard the time) huffed his displeasure, but consented to recline back against the pillows when DiMA pressed a hand to his shoulder. “I shouldn't be wasting time in bed when there's so much work to catch up on, but I see it's a little late to worry about that now. Is the whole of Acadia out there?” He nodded towards the window where he could catch glimpses of the synths playing their game through the holes in the curtain. “For the most part.. it was such a beautiful day and it seemed a shame to waste it. You worry too much Faraday, our work can keep for a little while without the whole island falling apart. Now eat these before they get cold.” He dropped the tray over Faraday's lap, effectively trapping him until he'd finished his breakfast. He only grumbled a little before he started wolfing pancakes down like a starving man, making DiMA grin like a cheshire cat. “Somebodies feeling better I see.” He teased, only grinning wider when he noticed the faint blush spreading across Faraday's cheeks. “They're really good.” He said it like an apology. DiMA merely shook his head, softening his expression while he set about straightening the room out a little. He paused when there was a sharp intake of breath and a quick exclamation. “You don't have to do that!” “No I don't have to.” The old synth agreed while he picked up a haphazardly discarded lab coat and folded it neatly. Faraday was definitely blushing now there was no mistake about it, but they passed a few minutes in relatively comfortable silence while the man finished his meal and drank his tea. He was usually a very tidy person but he'd been feeling a little sorry for himself the previous night and hadn't had the motivation to clean up, so he kept flashing apologetic glances DiMA's way whenever the synth turned to face him, but they were all waved off with the same gentle smile. They kept on this way until the room was spotless and DiMA helped himself to a seat on the edge of the bed. “So.. about last night..” the synth started cautiously, lacing his fingers together in his lap and keeping his gaze locked on them. Before he could say another word however the scientist suddenly found a burst of energy, practically leaping out of bed and talking over DiMA loudly. “Well I'm certainly feeling much better now that's for sure! Thank you for bringing me food, and for tidying up.. you really are a good friend to me DiMA.” There was something sad in his grey blue eyes as he put subtle emphasis on the word 'friend'. “You're right though it looks like a beautiful day outside. If I'm going to be forced to take a day off work then I'm going to do it properly. Give me some time to shower and I'll be right out.” He was already rummaging around for towels, studiously avoiding DiMA's attempts to catch his eye. The old synth knew when he was being dismissed, but he still found himself hovering awkwardly, clacking his metal fingers together in a nervous gesture as he debated how far to push it. When his shadow fell across Faraday's back the scientist froze, his posture tense. DiMA reached out to touch his shoulder. “Faraday.. I-” He pulled his hand back sharply as the man flinched away from his touch. One look in his eyes when he turned to face him told DiMA that it hadn't been intentional, but he looked so uncomfortable with his presence. His eyes were shuttered, any emotions he might have been feeling carefully stowed away. “DiMA it's okay. I'm okay. I just..” tailing off with a sigh, he slumped back against the dresser he'd been searching through, defeated. “I can't do this right now.” Something inside DiMA ached with longing to somehow give him the courage to talk about his obvious feelings, but it hurt so badly to see what it was costing his friend even to admit that there was something to do. It was more than he'd managed to get him to admit to last night, after he'd joked about kissing a woman right in front of him. It was progress. He hid his disappointment behind a gentle smile and reached behind his slumped friend, ignoring the way he tensed, to retrieve the toothbrush he'd been searching for. His fingers brushed against Faraday's hand as he handed it over, the skin heated even to his slightly dulled sensors. It took a lot of willpower to stop himself from letting that touch linger, instead taking a step back to give him some space and trying to keep his tone light as he made to leave. “Naveen made the pancakes.” He blurted clumsily, unable to find anything else to say. Faraday blinked slowly, still frozen in place with a towel in one hand and his toothbrush clutched tightly in the other like he was seriously planning on using it to stab something. The flat expression he'd been carefully maintaining broke as one eyebrow rose higher than the other, questioning. DiMA cursed himself inwardly. “So you know who to thank, if you wanted to. He's been asking after you quite a lot.” It was true of course, for someone struggling so badly with his own problems Naveen had a remarkable capacity for caring about others. It just hadn't been what he'd wanted to say. The scientist rubbed the back of his head, messing up his bedhead even further. “Oh well.. I will then. That was nice of him.” It wasn't the right time for crickets to start chirping, but the silence between them was so uncomfortable that DiMA wouldn't have been surprised to hear them start singing now, just to fill it with something. He eyed the door, planning his escape, but he always found his eyes drifting back across the room to linger on Faraday's despondently slumped form. No matter how hard he tried he couldn't force himself to leave. Something was too wrong with the picture in front of him. “I'm sorry but I have to do this.” He uttered like it was some kind of solemn promise, and crossed the room in three long strides until he was standing barely an inch away from the source of his frustration. Blue grey eyes widened, the pupils in them blowing out wide as DiMA leaned closer, the gap between them rapidly reducing down to nothing as the slightly taller synths hand came up to hover near his cheek. “D-diMA..” the scientist stammered breathlessly, unable to look away from his pale gaze. Hearing his name spoken that way, with longing, would have cemented DiMA's resolve if it hadn't been so easy to feel his violent shaking at such close quarters. He was scared.. borderline terrified. It wasn't the right time. Quickly running every possible excuse through his mind for why he'd needed to come so close, he cheered inwardly when he found the perfect one nestled in the corner of Faraday's mouth. The crumb of pancake fell away as DiMA brushed his thumb over it. He watched it fall with an overly satisfied nod, then turned on his heel and made for the door before he could acknowledge any of the flustered spluttering coming from the man he'd almost kissed. “Well I'll leave you to it then Faraday. It's good to see you with some colour again.” He breezed a little too cheerfully, pausing in the doorway so as not to seem rude. “I'll see you later.” He tore himself away from the sight of Faraday holding his head in his hands before he did something stupid.

[momoshin]

nsfw alphabet - chaeryeong

A = Aftercare (What they’re like after sex)

not as clingy, if she’s in dom space she’ll get up to bring you some water and a rag to clean you up a little. if she’s in sub space she lays there literally as if she were passed out (has happened before) and waits for you to help her up

B = Body part (Their favourite body part of theirs and also their partner’s)

hers is probably her waist, and her lips. yours, your thighs!

C = Cum (Anything to do with cum basically… I’m a disgusting person)

she loves when people squirt on her. like if you’re sitting on her face and just came she’ll rub your clit even harder to make you squirt on her face. or she loves when you ride her abs, because she can see and feel your slick the wetter you get. she feels used and she loves it.

D = Dirty Secret (Pretty self explanatory, a dirty secret of theirs)

i think the previous one falls as a dirty secret but if i had to add another, i'd say the thought of someone watching her sub for you turns her on. (example; her members)

E = Experience (How experienced are they? Do they know what they’re doing?)

i don't think she's experienced in the way that like she's slept with a lot of people, i wouldn't be surprised if you were her first! but since she's really good at following instructions i think she learns fast. and her being inexperienced doesn't mean she was bad either, just a little timid and clueless.

F = Favourite Position (This goes without saying. Will probably include a visual)

i said this in the wildcard ask, but 69 is definitely in there. she also loves missionary, and like her legs bent and pressed against her chest between the two of you.

G = Goofy (Are they more serious in the moment, or are they humorous, etc)

i feel like she is very giggly but more of a nervous, shy giggle? not that she has anything to be nervous about in the first place but she's chaeryeong, it's her nature to be shy and nervous. i feel like sex is never really but i also serious with her, it’s always comfortable enough where joking and giggling is normal. ( except if she's being punished/ degraded)

H = Hair (How well groomed are they, does the carpet match the drapes, etc.)

i feel like she either shaves or waxes pretty often, she just orefers it that way

I = Intimacy (How are they during the moment, romantic aspect…)

she’s such a sensual, romantic person. if it were up to her she’d get railed with rose petals around you two all the time, or in a bath. and something i feel she loves are lap dances or strip teases, just imagine her swaying her hips to slow music and sliding a thong down her legs...

J = Jack Off (Masturbation headcanon)

chaeryeong is a pillow riding person. it doesn’t matter in what headspace she is. but she lets out the smallest whimpers when she’s close, sometimes you make her put on a show and it’s so?! like she doesn’t even have to actually “put on a show” because watching her ride a pillow is enough. her noises , expressions and the way her body just reacts ?

however, if she’s domming you, she’ll gladly make you watch her (without allowed to touch yourself)

K = Kink (One or more of their kinks)

she loves dry humping, whether she is in a subby or dom headspace she will never pass up the offer of riding you completely clothed, but her favorite is when the two of you are laying together, legs crossed and your thigh right in her crotch, both of you in sweatpants preferably, she loves that.

giving; bondage, whipping, spanking, slapping, deepthroating (when subbing, she loves to deepthroat straps;) thigh riding, just riding in general.

receiving; nipple play, ice play, spanking, slapping, spitting, choking, hair pulling, overstimulation, thigh riding, degrading, praise, ab riding too :)

L = Location (Favourite places to do the do)

i feel like she’s perfectly fine with your bedroom, but sometimes the kitchen !

M = Motivation (What turns them on, gets them going)

for some reason she loves when you’re barefaced, just getting home to you with no makeup and waiting for her all day makes her feel some type of way.

N = NO (Something they wouldn’t do, turn offs)

knife play, clamps, shocks (anywhere)

O = Oral (Preference in giving or receiving, skill, etc)

prefers receiving (whether in sub or dom space) likes to be laying on her back with her legs spread :) but if in dom space prefers to sit on your face.

P = Pace (Are they fats and rough? Slow and sensual? etc.)

oh she loves fast, rough sex to the point that you literally fuck her stupid honestly. but like i said she is a fool for slow, romantic sex, so missionary while you bury a plastic dick in her slowly, each thrust deeper and harder than the last, is also her favorite.

then again whether she’s domming or subbing she also loves riding you, both of you so close breathing into each other’s lips.. loves the closeness of it all really. dom chaeryeong however prefers a teasing, not too slow not too fast pace :)

Q = Quickie (Their opinions on quickies rather than proper sex, how often, etc.)

mm i don't think she is ever that desperate for quickies, except if you're about to go somewhere and she really wants you to fuck her, but otherwise she'll just whine and beg until you cave in and go home with her to properly make her cum.

R = Risk (Are they game to experiment, do they take risks, etc.)

not at all. she likes to experiment, it’s how she discovered she liked domming you in the first place, but she will not take any risk involving her job, maybe risks such as being caught by the members and such but otherwise i feel like she's too much of a scaredy cat to risk anything.

S = Stamina (How many rounds can they go for, how long do they last…)

she likes overstimulation, so i assume she can go for quite a few rounds, but i will say she cannot really edge herself or hold off from cumming, maybe the first time yeah but after she's cum once she can't really stop

T = Toy (Do they own toys? Do they use them? On a partner or themselves?)

she doesn’t really use or have any toys for herself, the toys she does have are usually for her to use on you or for you to use on her. but some of the things in her drawer are a suctioning vibrator, handcuffs/rope or anything to tie your wrists, a whip, a spreader bar

U = Unfair (how much they like to tease)

soo much, wearing thongs with tight pants, short crop tops with no bra, sometimes sleeping in nothing but underwear. if she's down for a punishment she'll flirt with the girls, completely platonic (which you know, but it doesn't piss you off any less)

V = Volume (How loud they are, what sounds they make)

i don’t think she’s loud persé but yes very vocal. i feel like she whines and whimpers softly more than she moans or yells, but her gasps are pretty loud. when she’s domming she likes to moan in your ear, she’s probably louder than when subbing but still not loud enough for someone other than you to hear it.

W = Wild Card (Get a random headcanon for the character of your choice)

chaeryeong really, really likes 69ing with you, like the feeling of being pleasured and pleasuring you? loves it, the way your moans send vibrations up her body when she hits just she spot? loves.

Y = Yearning (How high is their sex drive?)

high but not too high, like she will say she can't take another orgasm but it's probably just for show, she'll take as many as you give her. what i mean is, her sex drive is high enough that she'll take every orgasm and round you give her, but she won't ask for more herself.

Z = ZZZ (… how quickly they fall asleep afterwards)

she doesn't let either of you get too comfortable afterwards if you haven't showered, etc. but once you do, as soon as she feels your arms around her she knocks out.

[deanandthephantoms]

We're a Perfect Harmony PT.3 - Reader x Charlie

This is Chapter 3 of my Perfect Harmony story. You can read Chapter 1 here and Chapter 2 here if you haven't yet. In this chapter we'll see what life after camp is like for y/n and Charlie.. Enjoy!

Missing you more than i should..

When I got home I was overwhelmed by the amount of silence in my home. I used to love being home, curling up on the couch watching a movie or reading a book in silence. I hated loud, crowded places and now I actually missed it? What happened to me? Who am I?! I thought to myself..

“Y/N is that you?” I heard my mom call out from the living room. “Hi mom!” i said while walking up to her and giving her a big hug. “How are you doing honey? How was it?” I hadn’t really spoken to my mom at all during the week, I had let her know once that I was doing alright and that was basically it. “It was incredible mom. I had the best group of people surrounding me..” and so I told her everything about my new group of friends and everything we had done during the week.. “Thanks for making me go mom.” “You’re glowing Y/N! I’m so happy you had such a good time. I honestly felt bad for making you go when I saw how nervous you were.” “yeah.. I kind of hated you for that.. but I guess sometimes mom really does know best.” After talking to my mom I decided to lay down for a bit all those late night chill sessions with Charlie and a night of not sleeping at all was really taking it’s toll, I don’t think I had ever been this tired before. I fell asleep with a smile on my face only to wake up the next freaking day at 10am. I slept for 15 hours I really had been tired.. I picked up my phone to see I was indeed added to the girls group chat, I was also in a chat with our entire camp group and Charlie had , like he promised, sent me a private text. Seeing that put a smile on my face. Now I know what you’re thinking.. but I really just liked him as a friend that’s all. I opened his message.

“Good morning Nugget! On a scale of 1 to 100% dead.. how tired are you?” I raised my eyebrow at the nugget part, no idea where that was coming from. Without hesitation I replied.. “ Hellllooooo! Nugget? What’s up with that? Very bold of you to assume that I was even tired to begin with by the way.. but to answer your question, I have slept for 15 hours.. that says something doesn’t it?” I was about to put my phone down assuming Charlie would take his sweet time to reply. But no. the 3 dots that told me he was typing appeared almost instantly and  seconds later this popped up on my screen; “15 HOURS?! Really? Are you sure you weren’t dead and came back to life or something? I thought I was bad with my 12 hours.. I’m blaming you for the fact I’m so tired by the way.” He’s blaming me?! Excuse me? “Pardon? What? What did I do?!” “You kept me up till at least 3am every night only to be woken up again at 7am.. i’ve never been so tired coming home after camp. So yes I’m blaming you Nugget.” “The nugget again? Really? Anyway. I’m not sorry. You kept ME up actually. I’m blaming you Charlie.” “Yes Nugget. You mentioned once you like nuggets. I’m calling you nugget now. You can’t stop me. Oh and I’m not sorry either 😉” “Riiight. Don’t expect me to start calling you after one of your gross foods.. but all jokes aside, i’m glad you’re not sorry. I mean, all those late nights might be one of my favorite things of last week.”  “Really? I genuinely thought I annoyed the shit out of you.” That text made me laugh. “Don’t get your hopes up Gillespie. You sure did. Apparently you’re just the type of guy who gets away with it.” I teased. “Ouch.. that hurt. :( “ is all I got as a reply. Which caused my brain to go in full panic mode, did I just really hurt my new friend? Oh god what if this ruined it all? As fast I could I sent him “I’m sorry! I’m just kidding! You know that right?! You didn’t annoy me at all dude, in fact you did the opposite you made me feel super chill and comfortable..” I stared at my screen for what felt like hours, in reality it was probably more like 5 minutes but I got no reply..

I sighed deciding to ignore my own stupid actions I got up from my bed and went downstairs making myself some breakfast. Sitting down at the table I actually found myself missing the man that had sat opposite of me the entire week. I was missing the man that made me feel sick with his strange food combinations. Missing the man that called me out for looking dead after 3 hours of sleep. Missing the man that annoyed me with how loud he was so early in the morning. Don’t get me wrong I missed the others as well they had all, in their own way, made that week a very good week for me. I had just connected with Charlie in a different way, he seemed to really get me, he understood where I was coming from. He had not once judged me, he made me come out of my comfort zone.. My phone buzzed on the table, my hand flew straight to it and picked it up only to see Charlie had replied. I felt my heart speed up and started feeling very nervous. Why was this happening? why was i scared for his reply? We had been teasing each other right from the start. This could not have been so bad that I ruined everything, right?!

With a deep sigh I opened our chat back up. “Y/N calm down. I know. I was just kidding too! Good to know I made you feel that way though. You do realize you did the same for me right? You made me feel better when I was feeling down. I really appreciate that.” I couldn’t help but let out a big sigh of relief. Thank god everything was alright. Why did I care so much? I had known this man for 8 days. Why was I already so afraid of ruining this friendship? “Charlie, I swear to god, you can never do that to me again! I thought I ruined it all..” I typed, but deleted. I didn’t want him to know a simple joke made me go into full panic mode, he’ll think I’m crazy.. so instead I went with “ha-ha, very funny Gillespie. And hey, cheering each other up, that’s what friends are for right? 😊” “Yeah definitely. You didn’t have to do that though, you barely knew me. Yet seemed to know me better than the people I’ve known for years. You noticed things others didn’t notice or they just decided to ignore it. You didn’t. You’re a good friend Nugget. I’m thankful for getting a chance to meet and know you.”

Reading that made me feel al warm and fuzzy inside I just sat there at the kitchen table with a dumb goofy smile on my face. That’s when my mom walked in. “What are you smiling about?” “ohhh nah it’s nothing.” I simply replied, hoping my mom would buy it. Too bad for me my mom knew me longer than today. “It’s a boy, isn’t it?” “Mom! I.. eeh.. no?.. I mean.. well technically.. Yes. But no. Charlie is just a friend mom.” And I truly believed I felt that way, my mom clearly didn’t though ..”oh alright, well we’ll see.” She replied. Before leaving me once again to get back to her office. I directed my attention back to the screen “You’re a good friend too Charlie. I’m thankful my mom made me go to camp. Thankful I now can call a few amazing people my new friends. I really miss you guys. Is that weird?” “Thank your mom from me for making you go! 😉 And no, that’s not weird. We all feel that way after camp. Don’t worry the feeling will vanish over time and we’ll keep in touch through texts and facetime!” “Facetime huh? Why don’t we facetime later, you can thank my mom yourself haha!” i texted half jokingly but Charlie seemed to think it was a good idea. We kept sending text to each other the rest of day and I noticed I was looking forward to seeing his face again. I missed his bright smile, his facial expressions that said everything for me. His eyes that showed he was fully invested in whatever you’re telling him. I missed his hugs. They really were the best hugs I had ever had. I sighed at the thought of having to miss those for a whole year.. Can’t exactly hug through facetime, can you?

Later that night Charlie called me on facetime, accepting his call I saw his bright smile pop up on my screen. “Nuggeeettt!” he screamed at me sounding all excited. I couldn’t help but instantly feel happy and laugh at him. I refused to get used to that nickname but also decided not to fight him on it tonight. “Gillespieeeeeeee!” I just screamed back at him earning a big smile in return. “Soo, first things first, get me to your mom, I need to thank her.” “Your wish is my command sir!” I reply as I get up from my bed to find my mom. I find her in the livingroom on the couch. “Hey mom, Charlie wants to tell you something” I say while handing her the phone. “Hello Mrs.Y/L/N!” “Ah, so you’re Charlie! I’ve already heard quite a bit about you.” If looks could kill I would have killed my own mom right then and there.. “Yes.. that would be me. I just wanted to thank you for sending your daughter to camp. She has been a good friend to all of us.” My mom laughed “You’re welcome dear. Thank you for doing the same to her” My mom then handed me my phone back. Giving her one last glare I make my way back to my bedroom. “Sorry about that..” I say to Charlie while walking upstairs. “Sorry for what? Your mom seems lovely. No need to be sorry.” Thankful for the fact he apparently did not pick up on the whole ‘heard quite a bit about you.’ I let out big breath I apparently had been holding in.

I sat back down on my bed and luckily for me Charlie had grabbed his guitar “so. How about we continue our little tradition of singing? Name a song and we’ll sing it.” He said with the biggest smile. I was just glad I did not have to explain why I apologized and quickly started thinkin of a song. “Do you know High hopes by Kodaline? It’s not the happiest song, but it’s sooo good!” “I’m kind of offended by the fact you’re even asking me if I know it.. It’s actually one of the first songs I learned to play on this guitar.” And before I could apologize for offending him I heard the first chords of High hopes being played. As if we were still on camp we sang a few songs, granted it didn’t go as smooth thanks to delay in the video and such but still it was nice. After a few songs I heard my mom come up and calling out a good night. “Char.. I think I’m gonna have to go. My mom is going to bed so you know I gotta be quiet now…” “Nooo! don’t hang up just yet. We can still just talk for a bit right?” I was caught of guard by his plea for me to stay. “I, eh. Yeah. Yeah we can. Of course we can. Give me a second though. I’m gonna change into my PJ’s.” and with that I threw my phone on the bed, grabbing my oversized Rush t-shirt that basically functioned as a sleeping dress. “Nice ceiling you’ve got there nugget.” I heard Charlie call out. Giving him a chuckle as response. Once I changed into my PJ’s I picked my phone up and brought Charlie with me to the bathroom. “Loving the house tour Y/N, where are we going now?” “To the bathroom. I need to brush my teeth.” “oh right let me go do the same!” and he sprinted of with me to his own bathroom. About a minute later we were brushing our teeth together. causing us both to giggle at each others charming facial expressions.

After I was done I went back to my bedroom and crawled into bed making myself comfortable. “sooo I assume you don’t want to be here when I go pee right?” “Eeew Charles! No. Either hang up the phone or put me somewhere far away!” He laughed at me “Yeah thought so.  I’m not hanging up so let me just put you down on my bed.” “ Oof.. That also sounds a bit strange sir.. But sure. You do that.” “kinda does, doesn’t it?” he laughed “Okay, I’ll be back, don’t go anywhere.” And with that I was staring at Charlie’s ceiling waiting for him to come back.. which he did incredibly quickly.

Crawling into his own bed he picked me up only to instantly put me back down again."You actually waited for me!" He said while I could see him taking off his shirt nothing I had not seen before but still a sight I sure was not mad about. “of course i waited, why would i leave without saying goodbye?” i reply before Charlie fell back down on the bed and picked me back up, trying to get comfortable he was tossing and turning a bit. “You alright there, Charlie?” I said half teasingly. “Yeah, quite comfortable actually. You? I really like your shirt by the way.” Why did I feel myself starting to blush? Acting as if nothing was happening to me I replied in my chillest and coolest way; “Yeah I’m alright. Very comfortable as well actually. Nothing beats sleeping in your own bed right?” “I don’t know about that nugget, I could think of a thing or two I totally would pick over sleeping in my own bed.” “Really like what?” When I see a mischievous smile appear on his face i’m suddenly scared of the answer I’m about to get. “Oh you know..” He falls silent with that same damn smile on his face. When I raise an eyebrow at him he continues; . “You know, Sleeping in a tent at festivals, or just camping with some friends in a beautiful piece of nature or something.” i let out a sigh of relief “oh righttt. Yeah i’m fully on board with all of that.”

Charlie and I talked for another hour while we we’re both laying in our beds. At some point I felt my eyes getting heavier and heavier, and I kept fighting it as hard as I could. I was enjoying this conversation way too much for me to go to sleep now. I totally believed I was hiding it from Charlie as well. I clearly didn’t though..“Hey Y/N?” “Mhhmm?” “You’re about to fall asleep aren’t you?” I’m silent for a while now really almost falling asleep. “Goodnight nugget.” I suddenly hear Charlie say softly. That wakes me back up a bit. “NO!” I clear my throat before continuing “I mean.. no I’m not tired..” “Oh really you’re not tired huh?” Charlie starts to imitate the way I had been acting and reacting the last 20 minutes. “okay okay Fine. Stop it Gillespie. You win, Nighty night Charles.” “night night Y/N. Talk to you again tomo.. well in a few hours,” He gives me one last sweet smile before I close my eyes and I hear Charlie hang up the phone right as I’m about to fall asleep. 

Charlie and I kept in contact like that every single day. We didn’t start our day without wishing each other a good morning and refused to go to bed without wishing each other a goodnight and giving each other a virtual hug. During our schooldays we took every free second to text and we made sure to hype each other up when something important had to be done. Late nights were still being made but the few hours of sleep never seemed to bother me. I was basically running on 4 to 5 hours of sleep each day and was doing just fine. i didn’t even come close to feeling tired and was ready to do it all over again the next day. Months passed spending my time just like that..

I had been in contact with all of them on the regular and today i was actually meeting up with Madison who lived somewhat close to me. I was so excited to see her again. We had agreed to meet at a train station and that’s where I was now waiting for her to arrive. Y/N! I hear Madison yell out. I look in the direction the voice was coming from, I see Madison and run up to her to embrace her in a hug. "Madiiiiii! I missed you! How youu doing?" I let go of her and she laughs at me. "How you doin? Charlie, is that you? " Leaving no room for me to defend myself she continues "kidding, I'm great! How are youu giiirl?" while catching up on how life has been we walk to the restaurant where we had made lunch reservations.

“Sooo” Madison said once we were sat at our table. “ Soo.. what?” i asked the girl who was grinning at me. “ Sooo what’s up with you and Charlie?” i give her a confused look.”What do you mean? We’re friends, Mads. You already knew that though..” Madi laughs at me. “ Really Y/N? That’s all you’re giving me? I know you and Charlie have been talking pretty much non-stop..” I can feel the blood flowing to my cheeks when I say “Well yeah, yeah we have. And yes I have enjoyed every minute of that. But that doesn’t mean anything is going on between us. We just get along very well. Besides, he’s still with Emma so I’m sorry to disappoint you but we’re just friends..” Madi just looks at me for a while before a smile spreads on her face.” What?” I ask her. “ You like him.” She simply states with the biggest smile.” What?! Mads I just told you..” I blurt out a little too loud and a little too fast to actually be somewhat convincing.. causing Madison to laugh at me again. “ Girl you soooo do! “

By now I feel like I'm looking like a tomato, bright red, and i don’t even know why. I truly believed I liked Charlie as a friend, nothing more nothing less. Sure he was the sweetest man i had ever met and sure he believed in me like no one had ever done. and yes we had this incredible connection and were on the same wavelength on so many topics. Yes he got me, yes I felt safe enough to fully be myself and fully be honest with him about everything. aaaand yes he was goood looking. But i didn’t like him like that. I Couldn’t. He was with Emma. Me and him were just friends. I would not let myself get a crush on this guy. It would ruin everything. “ Look Mads. I’m not gonna lie. I do miss hanging out with him in real life and Charlie does make me very happy. But i don’t like him like that. He’s just a good friend to me.” Madison clearly was not convinced.”Sure, keep telling yourself that Y/N.”

And I did. In the following weeks I kept telling myself I didn't like him. I just missed him that was all. The more I talked to Charlie and the more the girls teased me about liking him the less I started to believe my own excuses. Untill the day i couldn’t deny it any longer. I totally liked Charlie more than a friend..

- read chapter 4 here

[crystu-cii]

OF COURSE!!!! I'd say you're hella close to it!!! Definitely closer than I am XDD 💖💞💝💕💝❤️💕💕❤️ A G R EED /hj XDD

Yeah ;w; oohh that sounds super interesting!! I can understand not pursuing a story tho, stories are d i f f icult-- XD fun, but difficult, and you need an attention span for them! (Why do you think I only write one page stories??)

OMS yessss that's so accurate tho-- like I haven't changed much if I'm being honest (I spend a LOT of time inside.. XD) awww-- I can understand that- in japan we didn't have a backyard, so I stopped going outside much at all-- occasionally I biked to convenience stores or walked to vending machines, that was cool, but no backyard :/ having no backyard sUCks, like where am I supposed to scream into the void?? INSIDE?? /j

OMS-- CRYS XDD what a Mood™ tho- "oh I'm gonna continue this thing!!" *does something else entirely*

XDD It was done Against My Will™ (get Against My Will on the album I Haven't Awoken Well Rested Since I Was A Child by the band The Bags Under My Eyes Aren't Makeup! XD) MOOD-- I spent the quarantine summer doing nothing but staying up until the sun rose and sleeping until it was at its peak- where did the time goooo

I AGREE HOW DARE HE- LIKE EXCUSE?? YOU TINY HEATHEN??? anyways now I'm trying to go back to squirting him with a squirt bottle to startle him(even tho he's a fan of water, the harsh spray startles him) but anyways thank you crysss I'm never getting a cat in my life now bc of this rude child (dogs are superior anyways /hj)

(and now time to reply to the OTHER ask cause I'm efficient and not going to send two separate asks to respond to things that can be responded to at the same time.. ....why did I even ramble about that wtf henry(huh I never refer to myself by name that felt weird))

Okay!! No worries dude, you can always take your time with replies, I just don't trust tumblr XD 💞❤️💕💝💝💖💕❤️💖 of course!!! Thank you!!! 💖💕💕💖💞💕

Oooh!!! That sounds super fun!!! Man I miss hanging out with my friends-- but my closest friend(lives in my neighborhood) has a parent who works in other people's houses, so high risk, and the rest live several hours away :)) but anyways yeah that sounds hella!!!! I love that y'all were just like "okay well. we're gonna hang out anyways." XDD

Aww-- I'm glad you are!! My brother and his bf were supposed to come but I think we have to postpone that cause someone in his workplace tested positive for covid :( YESS FOODDDD-- oooh cheesecake?? I've never heard of having it on Thanksgiving!! Usually we have pumpkin, cherry, apple, and pecan pies!! (We're having pumpkin and cherry ones this yeah!! Two pumpkin pies, a cherry pie, and a cherry cobbler--) I... Have never heard of pineapple pie in my life! Sounds like it would make pineapple-on-pizza haters burst into tears tho--

YOURE WHAT-- CRYS YOU HEATHEN IT IS NOVEMBER!!!!! /j I can't stand Christmas music, being a choir student made me not be a huge fan of it-- too much Christmas music.. ugh. (Straight no chaser is tolerable at least. And Pentatonix. And covers by artists I like. But if I have to hear Jingle Bells ONE MORE TIME--) YESSS BESTOW UPON ME THOU'S PRESENCE AND PRESENTS... Ooh nice!! Pfft XDD Yess- I have multiple on my wishlist-- mostly for the switch-- OMS I CAN'T BELIEVE I DIDN'T ASK FOR THSC-- MAYBE IM THE HEATHEN--

Okay, it's January 5th! Literally not even two weeks after Christmas-- Feel free to scream happy birthday at me :3 XDD now I'm curious, what's yours?

awhhh thank you ;w;; 💕💞💕💞💞💕💞

and legiT- and omg- also what i do a lot is thinking i have a story all in control but then i realise that i only focused on the main parts and nOT the transitions and all that shit and then i end up last minute thinking them- XDD and ngl one page stories sound SOO much better- imo- not just for writing- but for reading as well- whenever i go to see a fanfic I always read the ones that has one chapter- dunno how to fully explain it- possibly cause its satisfying to see a story actually have its end other than a long lasting series that will never end- XDD oneshots are my FUEL

buT WoW omg this topic has now made me realise how i barely go outside- XDD i wish there would be other thingd around my neighborhood other than a "park" that has DEAD GRASS and the sprinklers go off like every hour for some reason- duNNo what the builders were thinking but i guess i dont mind- i stay in my house a whOLELE lot xD

and YESS IT GETS ME EVERYTIME- "hey lets draw-" *-WRITES-* XDD AND ABHAHAHAHA (NOW ON YOUR LOCAL MUSIC STORES- XDDDD) and omG MEEE- the times i would usually sleep would be around 3 am to 6 am- ironically my mom has a more screwed up schedule than i do- and SHE STILL HAS- last night she told me that she hasnt slept in 48 HOURSSS- MaMAAA PLEASE SLEEP

GO AWAY CAT HEATHEN- XD and omG a squirt bottle of water yes XDD and awh i definitely understand now how youll not get a cat- sounds like a hecka pain ;0;; i never even had a pet before (or not that i would recall- oh wait i think i had fish but i have an embarrassing story that made my mom ban fish from the household- OH MAN the shame)

and yeahh oh man- i hope you are okay with all these topics XDD and thank you!! 💕💞💕💞💕💞💕💞

awwhh i see- i wish you can hang out with your friends without it being too risky! that reminds me of that one time where my friend said "hey so uh you guys can hang out at my house since at my parent's workplace someone was positive for covid" and then immeadiately after they were like "SO WE NEED TO GO TO ONE OF YOUR GUYS' HOUSE" and Im LIKE- UH- NOO??? nOt AfTEr you just say THAT- nuh uh- thankfully we didnt hang out that day- better safe than sorry xD

and omggg those pies sound AWWESOMEEEE- i always wanted to try pumpkin pie before but when i asked my mom that she was like "nO iTS diSGusTing" and im like "*visible confusion*" and lOwKEY SAME- pineapple pie just sounds a bit off but my mom was really hyped to make it xD i'd actually say its not that bad! but im still not a fan of pineapple so uhhh xD (aNd YEAH IT DOES feel like it would make those haters cry-- XDD)

and PFHAOHFA IM A LIVING HEATHEN- XDD omg at this time of year- it gets CRAZYY for me- first off- Tree is a true filipino- right when it was the first day october- youd hear them say "FUCK HALLOWEEN"(and id just whine to them like "BUT HALLOWENENENEN") and then their family set up a whole christmas tree and over-the-top decorations- and omg- if you hate christmas music- you would despise the philippines sO MUCH- when the FIRST day of SEPTEMBER hits- CHRISTMAS MUSIC ON ALLLLL THE STORES- it will drive you WILDDD ( yeah its actually a normal filipino thing- not that i ever went to the philippines myself at tHAT time of year- but my friends and family tell me all about it- filipinos are the true christmas maniacs XDDD)

and awhhh choir must be a pain ;0;;; that would remind me how on one concert- the beginners class of choir screamed on purpose even though they werent supposed to- the teacher got so pissed XDDD and YESSS PRESENTSSSS- and awh man- i actually dont own ANY consoles at all- so the only things i can ask for is steam games- last year for christmas i got just shapes and beats- which was WORTHHH

and oo YAY- now i shall mark that on my calander- XD and mine is february 7!

[faverinfairy444]

MY HEAD HURTS SOO BAD GOD I HAVEN'T SLEPT PROPERLY SINCE MONDAY LIKE FOR WHAT im in so much pain but i'm scared to even inform my mother she's about to flip but ugh i wanna cry legit suffering

[ultra-deepestbouquet]

3/24/2022

I am back on 0 self control with the drinking and coke and now I am adding in smokes. Thank goodness I feel ok today and I will need to go to ballet to not disrupt my schedule. I haven't slept great the last two nights because my mind is racing about all of our upcoming social things and work is frustrating. Tuesday wasn't soo bad it was just 3 glasses of wine and vape instead of actual cigs but last night was all three vices but I was able to fall asleep fine at my usual time. A can be such a bad influence with the damn cigs. I need to put my foot down meeting Ryan on Friday and I don't even feel like getting crazy this weekend. Maybe I will completely shock myself and be sober on Saturday night or give myself a 3 drink limit. My shenans this week are really making me feel disappointed. But at the same time, I shouldnt be so hard on myself. And im still keeping up with the gym, eating is bad again. Last week I was barely eating dinner and drinking too much wine at night. I am really trying to only have 8 drinking days a month but so far its 12 maybe 13.

[tooruhyung]

東京 はクレイジー = tokyo wa kureijii = tokyo is crazy

I cannot say this enough... This city is so unbelievable! Today i started my day with a subway rush hour ride, a true metro cramming... I was particularly hanging out from the train but to my surprise it was also a very organized chaos. Everyone was calm and so very used to it that it felt very normal to breath in each others neck. It is normalized so much that it felt calm and nothing big for me too. It is just an other fact of life here. My first destination was Asakusa and the Senso-ji. It is one of the oldest temples of the country, it is a buddhist temple for the god of Mercy, Guanyin but there's also a shinto shire and a full street of different parlors offering charms, food and omiyage (souvenir basically) To be honest so far this place had the biggest impact on me. It is extremely beautiful and has such a strong spirituality to it even in the flood of tourism presence. I had some sweets and shaved ice here. I also offered some insects burners and took a fortune. The fortunes are an other ritual. There's a metal box with various sticks inside that have numbers on them. You shake the box to get one stick out and check what number it gives. You open the drawer of the same number and take the top paper out. That is your fortune. I got a good fortune and i feel indeed blessed. If one draws bad luck it should not be taken home but tided to a given place. Asakusa and Senso-ji really stole my heart. After that i went to Akihabara electric town. Here i was reminded of my awesome map reading abilities as i walked around in circles until i found the 3 main things I wanted to check. Surprisingly all of them are anime shops... i was wise enough not to buy anything as i will return to Tokyo either way in September. Akihabara or as the hip locals call it 'Akiba' didn't really appeal to me. Just like Harajuku i found it just too much™ I went to Shinjuku from there which is again an area you could think overwhelming but instead it's absolutely lovely. Hidden little ancient shrines dating back to the Edo period right next to the Kabukicho. But before I reached there a guy from Kongo started to talk to me while i was trying to decide what drink to get from the vending machine and in the end he bought it for me as he so I wanted to use my pasomo card but the machine only took cash. It was a nice encounter. Kabukicho is a special place it is an entertainment area. Basically home of maid and host cafes and other strange and strange entertainment facilities. Like the robot restaurant... Fun fact: Kabuki is the japanese theater and kabukicho was originally an area for that. Next to it is Golden Gai a place full and full of tiny japanese inns. Shinjuku itself is quite huge with so much to see, its hard to put it to words. So i was strolling around for hours and at a point this guy just asks me where i am from. So i tell him and we chat a bit and he is an English teacher and he offers to show me around a little bit. Well this lead to my Friday night karaoke outing! Amazingly authentic Japanese way of going out... Also YES IT WAS SUPER WEIRD that i went to a soundproof room with a stranger.... but i took the chance and turns out this was just a very very nice guy. So we sang for like an hour and then went to see all the neon lights of Shinjuku. After that i said goodbye to Ryuu my karaoke pal and went to Shibuya again. I feel like I can't get enough of that place. I was strolling around Shibuya for about an hour more just taking in all these sights and saw a pretty amazing street rap performance. And the funny thing is that even in Shibuya where a western tourist is not a rare sight these rapper guys asked me where i was from in between their performances and were like chatting with me when there was about a billion people watching them. Soo today was a day of random encounters. I got home relatively early at half past nine so hopefully tonight my jetlag will subside and i can sleep around midnight. I haven't slept much since i am here tbh.