#Jesse Norman | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

greatlydelirious · 2 years

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𝐖𝐡𝐚𝐭 𝐒𝐥𝐚𝐬𝐡𝐞𝐫 𝐃𝐢𝐜𝐤𝐬 𝐋𝐨𝐨𝐤 𝐋𝐢𝐤𝐞

Slashers x F!Reader

What [blank] Dicks Look Like Masterlist

summary: “An extremely detailed description of different Slasher dicks.” Hex Color Codes, predictions of exact measurements, what sex would be like; basically, I went crazy with it.

warnings: pure debauchery, very much my own opinion

Billy Loomis:

Height - 6′ 0″ (1.82m)

Body Type - Lean, Toned

Tip - #AE6D6A

Shaft - #D49D8A

Length - 6.8in (17.27cm)

Girth - 4.6in (11.68cm)

Details - Circumcised, cleanly shaven, and has noticeable dark blue veins when he becomes fully erect. Grower, not a shower.

Billy is a lot of things; mysterious, brooding, and brash, but understated isn’t one of them. His plans are big, but his cock is bigger. It wasn’t a surprise for you when you say how large he was for the first time. Although it barely fit in you, it did fit his personality. The only thing he is more passionate about than revenge is fucking you until you can barely walk the next day and need to call out of school.

Expect to also have bruises and love bites to boot. Billy loved to lay his claim on you by making sure you had visual reminders that you were taken. Even if he was with Sidney, he needed everyone to know you weren’t up for grabs.

Just like him, the tip of his cock is a dark and heady reddish-purple. Billy’s taste in sex is quite rough and possessive. He took you with his cock in every way imaginable and only used positions that had you flush against him.

If he’s not inside you, he’s practically fucking you with his eyes. He watches your every move like a predator assessing its prey. An apt description when his eyes are as dark as a shark and he holds you so tight like you’ll bolt at any moment.

Do you want to be possessed completely and treated like a fuck doll? If so, Billy Loomis is your guy.

Stu Matcher:

Height - 6′ 3″ (1.90m)

Body Type - Lanky, Toned

Tip - #EDA491

Shaft - #F1BDA8

Length - 7in (17.78cm)

Girth - 3.9in (9.90cm)

Details - Circumcised, hair is a little overgrown, but it’s thin so it’s not really a problem. Tilts to the left.

Just like his stature, Stu’s cock is thin and long. He fits nicely into your pussy but couldn’t completely bottom out.

Sex with Stu is more fun than anything else. He likes to make you giggle and squirm, especially while you’re impaled on his cock. He’s a goofball through and through, but at the drop of hat, he’ll go from tickling you to fucking into you like a man possessed.

Like any other young man, Stu’s as horny as it gets. His love language is touch so he’ll always either have his arms around you or have you planted on his lap. The latter was a dangerous game as it inevitably led to him grinding up into your ass. You tried to be discrete, but he was so long and always so hard against you, you couldn’t help but blush and bite your lip till you almost bled to suppress the string of moans that threatened to spill out.

Billy would always snicker at how you “fucked like rabbits”. Thank God for birth control, because with how frequently you fuck and how deep Stu comes in you, you would be pregnant by now.

Despite your continuous salacious activities, your relationship was rather sweet. You loved how you had to go on your tiptoes to kiss him and the way you got to lay your head in the middle of his chest while you snuggled together. You especially loved how he always made sure you were comfortable and getting maximum pleasure from sex.

To make a long story short; Stu was the pinnacle of a golden retriever boyfriend (with a big dick).

Mark Hoffman:

Height - 5′ 9″ (1.75m)

Body Type - Strong

Tip - #D47F71

Shaft - #E3A78D

Length - 6.9in (17.52cm)

Girth - 5.3in (13.46cm)

Details - Circumcised, hair is trimmed, but not fully shaved, and he has one thick vein that runs along the underside of his shaft. Tilts upwards and to the right.

Intimidating was a word apt for all aspects of Mark Hoffman. Personality, looks, and more importantly his dick. You can still remember the first time you saw him in all his naked glory. As you gaped like a codfish, that damn devilish smirk spread across his face in cocky male triumph. At least that time you could agree with it.

The ratio of length and width was perfect for deriving pleasure that wasn’t painful, but filled you to the fullest. A personification of the phrase “just right”.

You loved to suckle and lick at the thick head of Mark’s cock. Lightly teasing him with pleasure light enough to make him grunt, but not completely come undone. But, just like the man himself, the tip is an angry red. Your teasing would last a minute before that same tip hit the back of your throat.

Mark loved to fuck your throat to feel how hard you work to accommodate him. Your lips stretched thin around his thickness almost uncomfortably. A factor that only worked to spur him on more.

When Mark Hoffman fucked you he didn’t seek to inflict pain. No, he made you so dick drunk that drool slid out your puffy lips and you couldn’t even begin to remember what day it was. That’s just what good dick does to a woman.

Bo Sinclair:

Height - 6′ 1″ (1.85m)

Body Type - Muscular

Tip - #BD7365

Shaft - #D59C88

Length - 8.1in (20.57cm)

Girth - 5.4in (13.71cm)

Details - Circumcised, clean-shaven (I mean look at his face, man grooms himself), and he has multiple veins along his shaft that are sensitive. Tilts upwards, hefty balls.

Holy Mother Mary and Joseph, Bo has so much feral masculinity it borders on toxic... okay it definitely is toxic. He’s charismatic, sexy, has a killer smile, a huge cock, and he knows it. Not only knows it, but revels in it. Cockiness is the least of your worries when it comes to Bo, however.

Bo is an experienced lover since he was the resident playboy when Ambrose was still bustling with life. Now you get the pleasure of having him all to yourself. More of a curse than a blessing since the man has an insatiable sex drive.

He fucks every hole you have with a delicious stretch that makes you moan like a whore. Bo praises you for taking him so well by grunting at you about how you're his “good little slut”. Degradation is his specialty, but you’re usually too dick-drunk to care (and the darker side of you absolutely loves it).

Bo is a shower all the way. His tight jeans leave little to the imagination as whenever you’re in the same room you can see the hard outline of his cock. An instinctual display of his dominance. He needed to be in power and you were more than happy to give it to him.

One of his favorite things was to have you lie your back on the bed with your head hanging off so he can fuck your throat. Nothing spurred him on more than the sight of his cock bulging down your throat. Sometimes he liked to wrap one of his hands around your neck, so he can feel him fucking you even more.

Get ready to familiarize yourself with being sore because Bo won’t go easy on you. If you do complain he is more than happy to ease your pain with his damned mouth. Good for being an asshole and even better for bringing you pleasure.

Vincent Sinclair:

Height - 6′ 1″ (1.85m)

Body Type - Lean, Strong

Tip - #C98274

Shaft - #DCAC99

Length - 8.2in (20.82cm)

Girth - 5.2in (13.20cm)

Details - Circumcised, clean-shaven, and slightly paler than his brother. Tilts upwards and to the left.

Vincent is the sweet version of his brother Bo. Although they possess similar impressive equipment, he lavishes your body like you’re royalty. He is more of a giver than a receiver.

Aftercare with Vincent was glorious. In the afterglow of sex, he will wet a rag in warm water to wipe you both off before laying you against his chest. Once you become putty in his strong embrace, he likes to run a brush through your sex-tasseled hair. A gesture that is even more intimate than what you just engaged in.

Vincent thought it was fascinating that you are so fascinated with his dick. So much so that he surprised you with a mold of it as a gift for you to use whenever he was unavailable. (If Bo found out, you would never hear the end of it.) In return, you offered to model nude for Vincent which of course led to passionate, mind-melting sex. His room seemed to turn into a sauna during it all. You always ended up being hot and sticky with sweat that made you want to sleep the rest of the day away more than anything else.

Even though he was always quiet, during sex he didn’t hold back the animalistic grunts that crawled from his throat. Fitting since his cock was perfect for breeding you fully. Another accurate fact since Vincent always lovingly stroked your belly afterward.

Vincent is sugar, spice, and everything nice in and out of the bedroom (if you aren’t a prospective statue that is).

Lester Sinclair:

Height - 5′ 7″ (1.70m)

Body Type - Scrawny

Tip - #C7877E

Shaft - #D6A795

Length - 5.3in (13.46cm)

Girth - 3.8in (9.65cm)

Details - Uncircumcised, a nice accumulation of hair, and veiny.

This man is the picture you see when you look up why size doesn’t matter. Lester has no qualms about putting in the work to make you orgasm. He eats you out like a starved man and his fingers are so deft that you forget he spent most of his day cleaning roadkill. Additionally, Lester always made sure to pay special attention to your clit while he fucked you.

He is the king of a quickie. In his truck, on top of his truck, on the ground, or in the bathroom; the man knows how to get you both off and do it fast. Especially since his brother Bo will never give the two of you peace.

Lester liked to call you his “little slice o’ heaven”. In his words, you were as sweet as pie and tasted like it too. It didn’t take much for you to rile the man up till he was chomping at the bit to touch you. When you wore your lace bra and tank top he would be practically beg on his knees.

Everyone underestimated him, but that left more for you. Who doesn’t love a man who isn’t afraid to get down and dirty? (Oh yeah, he totally eats ass too. I have no shame in saying it).

Brahms Heelshire:

Height - 6′ 3″ (1.90m)

Body Type - Muscular

Tip - #DA9F99

Shaft - #D7A294

Length - 7.8in (19.81cm)

Girth - 4.6in (11.68cm)

Details - Circumcised, hairy just like the rest of him (facts are facts). Hangs low.

It was a mystery how Brahms was so well endowed with, well... everything. The man was mouth-wateringly muscular despite his proclivity for slinking in the walls all day and to say he was hung was the understatement of the century.

One time when Brahms was desperately grinding against your stomach you shivered at the realization of how long he was. The tent that grew in his sweatpants could have housed five people. A fact that the boy didn’t fully quite understand.

Ever the eager one, Brahms wanted nothing more than to completely sheath himself inside you in one thrust. Although, a good hard squeeze of his cock made him listen to you; even if he whined in need. (However, he loved nothing more than to bury his face in your sweet folds. Something he was far too good at for his inexperience.)

He liked when you were authoritative yet sweet. Whispering to him what you wanted him to do if he wanted to be your “good boy” while running your thumb along the slit on the pretty pink head of his cock.

Although Brahms only slightly stretched your pussy, the way he could barely bottom out in you made your toes curl with tortuous delight. Each push inside you made him rub against the spot that made your eyes roll back and made his tip kiss your cervix.

Brahms Heelshire may have no experience before you, but he learns rather quickly like the good boy he is.

Thomas Hewitt:

Height - 6′ 5″ (1.95m)

Body Type - Wide, Strong

Tip - #C7777A

Shaft - #EABCAF

Length - 4.8in (12.19cm)

Girth - 6.0in (15.24cm)

Details - Uncircumcised, another hairy bastard, and has thick veins. Huge balls.

What he lacks in length, he makes up for in width, because just like every other inch of his body, Thomas’s cock is thick.

Prep is key for the beast of a man to snuggly (while still stretching) fit inside your warm depths. Thomas is desperate as he spreads you with his fingers, one at a time. One turns into two turns into three, and by the fourth, you’re a whimpering wet mess begging to finally be filled by the real thing.

Pre-cum weeps from the tip of his blushing cock as his bulky frame cages you in and fucks you like an animal in heat. The deep flush on the head is the same color as the flush on his cheeks by the end of your far too-loud lovemaking.

Charlie Hewitt often vulgarly taunted Tommy about him “fucking” you, but Thomas was so head over in heels with you, the only phrase he liked to call what you two did was lovemaking. Even if he was rather rough on occasion. Every time your sweet voice asked him, “Do you want to make love to me Tommy?” while you stroked his broad chest, he felt like he would burst right then and there.

Tall, strong, and wide, not only was he sturdy enough to not be swept away by a tornado, Thomas Hewitt could satisfy all your primal needs. And you did for him as well, because based on the whined grunts and growls he showers you with; pumping you full of his cum was Thomas’s favorite thing.

Michael Myers:

Height - 6′ 8″ (2.03m)

Body Type - Strong

Tip - #EFA29A

Shaft - #F5BEAB

Length - 9.7in (24.63cm)

Girth - 5.6in (14.22cm)

Details - Circumcised, good amount of hair, and veiny. Hangs low (Do you see the size of that thing?).

Silent, but deadly. Inhumanely strong. A giant amongst man. And that’s just the descriptions for Michael’s dick. But seriously, it was a wonder how you survived being his girlfriend. He was a little too thick and a little too long. Not that you're complaining, it’s just A LOT to get used to.

Michael took you hard and near brutal when he wanted, how he wanted you. Despite this he still had an underlying tenderness. When he slammed you against the wall he cradled the back of your skull in his enormous hand. Instead of just ramming in you he scissored two of his thick fingers inside you to make sure you were relaxed and wet enough to accommodate him. Something that didn’t take very long, especially when he let your hands roam across the expanse of large muscle he procured over the years.

The light pink tip of Michael’s cock was soft and velvety; a stark contrast to the rough edge of, well, everything about him. Surprisingly, Michael wasn’t keen on fucking your throat like he did your pussy. He enjoyed looming over you as you gently sucked on the head while stroking his shaft with both of your hands (there was even room for a third).

Sometimes he even just liked using your mouth to warm his large cock. That’s the only way you could get him to finally lay in bed. Nothing was more comforting for him than resting his cock in your wet mouth while you occasionally swallowed around him to prevent yourself from soaking your sheets in drool.

With his size pain was customary, but it only added to the onslaught of pleasure Michael gave you time after time.

Freddy Krueger:

Height - 5′ 10″ (1.77m)

Body Type - Average

Tip - #E37B6E

Shaft - #FCBCA0

Length - 6.1in (15.49cm)

Girth - 3.9in (9.90cm)

Details - Self-circumcised (iykyk), no hair whatsoever, and similar to the look and texture of the rest of his skin. Details are for his natural state because he can make his dick whatever he wants.

This is what nightmares are made of it, but when it comes to you it is in the most sensual way. Like I said above I put what I think is his “natural dick state”, but Freddy can be as big or small as you want him to be. Want to be fucked by tentacles? He can do that. Want to be fucked by a guy with two dicks? Easy peasy. Want to be fucked by a dick that vibrates? Okay, I think you get the point by now.

If you’re into Freddy you have to be a little bit of a masochist. Those knife fingers aren’t just for display babe. It’s his way to have you marked by him even when you aren’t in the same realm. You either have to bundle yourself up or create lie on top of lie about how you have a really angry cat.

After terrorizing some poor victim, Freddy loved to thoroughly pump the leftover adrenaline into you. This made sleep not fully restful for you. The only time he is soft on you is when you fall asleep during the day. If he is not busy during those times, he will shower you with gentle touches and slow foreplay. Freddy likes to call you his “sleepy kitten”. Which is a nice reprieve from the many other groaned nicknames. Including but not limited to; slut, whore, dripping cunt, dirty little bitch, etc.

Freddy might be a dirty old man, but he is your dirty old man.

Jason Voorhees:

Height - 6′ 5″ (1.95m)

Body Type - Strong

Tip - #AE8071

Shaft - #CDAD90

Length - 7.1in (18.03cm)

Girth - 5.7in (14.47cm)

Details - Uncircumcised, sparse/ patchy hair, and deep purple veins. Tilts slightly down.

Jason is like water in your hands (no pun intended). He was enamored by you the first time he saw you. You were so delicate and soft-spoken and didn’t engage in all the sinful activities everyone around you did. Rarely did his mother approve of anyone, but for the first time Pamela told Jason to go protect the “sweet girl”. Something he couldn’t agree with more.

Although he is the most inexperienced, he is also the most eager. Jason doesn’t fully understand his own arousal, but what he did know was that he wanted to touch you... everywhere. Pure instinct and your encouragement aids him in exploring your joint pleasure.

The last thing Jason wanted to do was hurt you. Unfortunately, he didn’t quite understand his own strength. Anytime you whined out in pain, he would immediately stop and pet your head in a gentle apology. All of Jason’s actions stem from the need to do good. Originally it was just for his mother, but now he wanted to do good for you even more so.

Jason’s cock has a dull hue due to his “reincarnation”, but you don’t mind. More than half of the time he is buried deep inside you anyway. He is so long and wide that its hard to pay attention to anything, but him.

At first Jason comes extremely quickly because the foreign pleasure is too overwhelming for him. Thankfully, he has no problems getting hard again and finishing right where you both left off. Stamina and strength coursed through his vein with an inhuman longevity.

With a little handholding, Jason has the attributes to be the sweetest and most attentive lover.

Jesse Cromeans:

Height - 6′ 7″ (2.00m)

Body Type - Muscular

Tip - #E3A391

Shaft - #EFC2A5

Length - 7.2in (18.28cm)

Girth - 4.5in (11.43cm)

Details - Circumcised, clean-shaven, and rather smooth. Perpetually hard.

Unlike all the other little pigs, Jesse tortures you with pleasure and only a bearable amount of pain. Considering his size, he found it easy to succeed in just that. In tandem with knives, ropes, whips, paddles, toys, and various tools of course.

Not only does the mask stay on during sex, but also the camera. The only eyes who would ever re-watch it though is his. In a way, you’re Jesse’s muse. You inspire his strong ambition and lust for blood. Truly the only woman to spread warmth throughout his body. Well, a warmth that’s not from blood.

I also need to mention that he smells so good. A mix of aftershave, cologne, and a hint of metal is a concoction that calls to your hormones. Masculine, yet sophisticated.

“Perpetually hard” means just that. Jesse is always ready to fuck you. If he isn’t actively doing it he’s either watching one of your shared tapes or thinking about it. The sheer thrill from his kills only adds to this constant flame of desire. Anyone who lengthens how long it will take for him to get back home to you will greatly regret it.

Jesse has the means to give you anything your heart desires. Although all you will be able to think about is his cock and dominating presence over you.

Asa Emory:

Height - 6′ 0″ (1.82m)

Body Type - Lean

Tip - #EDAB90

Shaft - #F8CBB4

Length - 6.9in (17.52cm)

Girth - 4.7in (11.93cm)

Details - Circumcised, clean-shaven, and flushes a hue of red when fully erect. Tilts upwards.

Like the creations he strives to make, Asa’s cock is perfection. Consistently colored with a small hue of red on the tip, soft-skinned, and tilted upwards enough to rub against your most sensitive areas. You would expect nothing less from him though.

This is an extremely dominant and submissive relationship. Although you are his prized creature, nothing is given to you freely. You must earn all his affection and expect to be punished when you act beyond your means. Asa loved how sweet you sounded while begging, but he loved how wobbly you sounded while being reprimanded more.

His cock is also big enough to hurt when he decided you didn’t deserve a gentle touch. However, if you took it like a good girl, he would make sure to soothe your aches and let you have a clean slate the next day.

Since Asa was the only person you interact with, you don’t merely crave his touch; you starve for It. Being a rare bird in a gilded cage made you stir crazy, but the second he spent time with you, all your previous sadness was quickly forgotten.

You may rely on Asa for everything, but no pet could ever compare to you. TLDR; You are a glorified sex slave, but no one in your life has cared for you this extensively.

Norman Nordstrom:

Height - 5′ 10″ (1.77m)

Body Type - Muscular

Tip - #ECA9A1

Shaft - #EEBEA2

Length - 8.4in (21.33cm)

Girth - 5.1in (12.95cm)

Details - Circumcised, hair is trimmed, and has one thick vein on the top side of his shaft that goes from the base all the way to the tip. Tilts upwards, hefty balls.

Norman is a strong force of nature despite his visual impairment. Extraordinarily little would lack in your relationship. He has great spatial awareness and even better hearing. Another bonus was that he loved to constantly be touching you. Norman had a particularly good idea as to what you look like. Not that your looks mattered to him. Your heart was invaluable and to be honest… so is your pussy.

Even though Norman is much older than you, he has no problems getting hard and fucking you properly. And boy his cock was so huge it was easy for him to have you drooling. He is also huge on oral sex; not for him, but for you. Norman made sure you were sufficiently wet for him to fill you with minimal pain. He also only liked coming inside you. Truly the king of breeding kinks.

The mating press will become your go-to position. Not only did it keep his cum inside you the best, but it helped him press into you the deepest. You will eventually learn to have no shame. Norman sure didn’t. I mean his sweatpants left very little doubt that he was constantly horny for you.

Norman will treat you like a princess and protect you like a knight. All he asks for in return is your heart and eventually a child.

Yautja:

Height - 7′ to 8′ (2.13m - 2.43m)

Body Type - Muscular

Tip - #83453D

Shaft - #7F6C41 near the tip and fades to #71653D at the base

Length - 12.4in (31.49cm)

Girth - 6.5in (16.51cm), 7.5in (19.05cm) knot

Details - Nothing to circumcise, no hair, and more details are below. Huge balls.

Did you really expect an 8-foot alien creature with more strength than you could ever dream of possessing to have an averagely large cock? The virility of Yautja males is unmatched by any other species in existence. Your hands will be figuratively and literally full.

Yautjas have their genitals sheathed inside them while they’re not actively mating. Leaving the area of the groin a rough round mound of skin. Due to their frequent hunting and sparring, it protects the sensitive flesh from being harmed.

The reddish-purple-hued tip is pointed and textured by ridges that help your male nuzzle his way deep inside you. Similarly, firm bumps and ridges travel down the widening shaft to aid in the mating process. The even thicker knot at the base of his cock keeps the Yautja snuggly in your depths to lock in all of his seed.

However, with the sheer quantity of hot seed he produces into you, a rush of it always spills out after he pulls out. While growling he will use his thick, rough fingers to coax it back inside you. An act that will never cease to make your face heat into a blush.

You audibly gasped when you first saw your Yautja’s cock in all its unsheathed glory. In contrast, the male trilled at the sight of the soft pink flesh between your legs that was tantalizingly dripping for him. Neither of you had seen the opposite species naked before. Something about the foreignness of it all made you even more worked up.

Mating with a Yautja is difficult at first, but once you finally fit all of him inside you, you’ll crave nothing else.

The amount of calculation and color comparison I did for this is wild. I hope you got a kick out of reading this because I sure did while writing it. Any and all interactions are greatly appreciated <3

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slasher-male-wife · 1 year

Text

What slashers do on their s/o's birthday

So today is my birthday. I'm officially 17 and I wanted to celebrate with a fic for myself and any other April babies. I hope y'all enjoy this.

Includes: Carrie White, Michael Myers, Leslie Vernon, Candyman, Norman Bates and Jesse Cromeans

Warnings: Implied stalking in Leslie's part

Carrie White

She's going to bake you whatever cake you want her to make. She's going to go all out for you on your birthday. Like she's putting effort into making this for you.

A gift from her is going to be a special birthday outfit that she made. She had you pick out the pattern and the fabric beforehand and gives it to you to wear on your birthday.

Also probably makes you a card. That or she writes a very heart felt note in a card she bought in her cursive hand writing.

She's also cooking you your favorite dinner. Whatever it is you want she'll make it for you. She's never had a special birthday that she got to celebrate so she wants to make it special for you.

I also feel like she'd be more open to physical affection on your birthday. She's a more reserved person so her holding you hand or giving you a kiss on the cheek is a big deal to her, but she's doing it because you mean so much to her.

Michael Myers

Might not remember that it's your birthday. He's a kind of busy guy who's already doing a lot by not killing you and being your boyfriend so he doesn't think it's a big deal if he forgets.

He in general doesn't understand why people celebrate birthdays. He thinks it's a little dumb but he's not going to say that, or really anything, to you.

When you remind him, he goes out and steals a gift for you. Something he's heard you mention before. Most likely from someones house. But if he's feeling like it he might steal it from a store.

If you're really close to him he'll put a tag with his name on it. It's going to be horrible hand writing that you could barely read but him writing "from Michael" is something really special.

If you have a cake on your birthday he'll happily eat some with you. Depending on how close you are, he might lift up his mask and eat it in the same room as you but it really depends on how long he's known you.

Leslie Vernon

He's been planning this since he first laid his eyes on you. At first you were going to be a victim but he ended up catching feelings for you and now you're dating. But that hasn't stopped him from learning everything about you.

He's going to be a bit of an asshole and act like he doesn't know that it's your birthday. He's going to act like it's a normal day and ask you to go out and get something so he can set up a surprise for you.

That surprise being something that you've wanted for a very long time. Whatever it is he finds a way to get it for you and sets it up while you're out of the house.

Also buys you a cake. He tried to make one himself but he was so bad at it that he had to throw it away and clean up half the kitchen.

He also does try to scare you a little bit. He just likes scaring people and you're one of them. He's sorry about it afterwards if you didn't like it but he thought it would be funny.

Candy man

He doesn't know his birthday, even if he did when he was alive he'd probably forget it by now. But he always remembers your birthday, for as long as you're with him he'll remember it.

I feel like he didn't know how to write when he was alive but in the afterlife he learned how to, meaning he's going to write you a lengthy love poem. He's going to be detailing everything he loves about you in this poem and more.

He's also getting you flowers, partly because of his bees, partly because he's a classic romantic. He's not getting you just any flowers either. He's stealing you your favorite flowers.

He's also taking you out on a date. A non-traditional one because, well he's an undead man who has supernatural powers. But it's still nice. Probably a walk around at night somewhere romantic.

I feel like he doesn't eat food because he doesn't need to but if you have cake for your birthday he's happy to sit with you and enjoy it together.

Norman Bates

He has your birthday marked on his calendar the moment he realizes that he loves you. He double checks before writing it down on his calendar and having a countdown.

He's going to make you breakfast in bed. Whatever your favorite breakfast foods are he's going to make them for you and serve you in bed, but he's going to stress not to get crumbs on the bed.

Like Leslie he's getting you a special gift that you've been talking a lot about. Anything that you really want he's going to get for you one way or another.

He's probably going to buy you a cake. He might make one and if he does it turns out pretty good because it was his mothers recipe. But he might get too anxious to actually do that so he's going to most likely buy a cake for you.

Like Carrie he's going to be more physically affectionate too. He'll be pretty nervous the first time he holds your hand for an extended period of time but he ends up craving more physical affection.

Jesse Cromeans

He's going to spoil you the entire day, no matter if you want him to or not. This man has money to burn he's not going to let you act like you don't deserve to be treated.

He either buys you gifts you've wanted or just gives you a ton of money to go shopping with him. He'll probably find some subtle way to ask you before your birthday and plan according to that.

He also takes you out to whatever fancy restaurant you want to go to. He's a rich and powerful man so he can get his assistant to get you two a table at whatever restaurant you want to go to.

If you want a cake for your birthday he gets the best bakery nearby to make you one according to your exact desires. He writes down exactly what you want and has his assistant help with getting it done.

You know how people put cash in cards for your birthday? Jesse stuffs way too much cash in your card. As if all of what he's doing today isn't enough, you're getting at least 3,000 dollars in your birthday card.

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