#LokiIsAceAU

[worstloki]

hmmmmmmm. I am not immune to aro/ace Loki.

[slashercatz]

Would you guys actually be interested in reading a IW and Endgame (maybe even Ragnarok) fix it fix? It would be pretty Loki centered, so keep that in mind. I’m just not sure I legit have the motivation to make one just for myself. I was also thinking of including art/comics in parts of it to visualize. Thanks

This is what the style would look like:

[worstloki]

Aroace Loki thinking that FINALLY he’s found someone who will understand his experiences on the sex-addled courtful realm of Asgard while listening to Sylvie talk only to realize she’s allo. A tragedy in its own right. Tries covering with “uhhhh yes of course there have been lovers. You too I assume? ...haha”

[worstloki]

Yelena: If straight people gotta change pronouns when they’re singing covers so they don’t sound gay then asexual singers have every right to replace any and all pronouns with “chicken nuggets”

Loki: I’m okay with that

Natasha: This is absolutely not the kind of conversation the mission commlinks are for

[worstloki]

loki is ace™ 

[worstloki]

did someone ask for aroace loki? 

[worstloki]

loki is ace and trying to get himself some ""conviction"" by fighting for a cause he believes in

[quote stolen from @hungry-skeleton 's post here]

[worstloki]

ok but in addition to ace loki what about ace thor. I mean he's like 1000+ years old and honestly he seems a lot more interested in fighting or hunting or training than dating. and even with Jane he seems to have a very chaste romantic and non-sexual or minimally sexual interest in her.

I read MCU Thor as straight and possibly aromantic (?) but i like to headcanon that he’s aromantic bisexual but has internalized stuff to work through so instead of registering that he’s sexually attracted he’ll assume he wants to fight them and becomes competitive (examples include but are not limited to Steve, Bruce/Hulk, Peter Quill,) 

Asexual Loki and Asexual Thor would be so fun though because imagine they’re both neutral-repulsed

Odin:  both of you were raised to be kings but only one of you can ascend the throne and carry on the family line--

Loki: Thor can have it

Thor: no no, Brother I insist, you can have it

Loki: I’d go power hungry in no time

Thor: A throne would suit me ill 

Loki: you’re older

Thor: well I ain’t gonna do it

---

Odin: Thor I’m making you king this is final

Thor, crying: dont make me use the peepee machine

Odin: 

Odin: I’ll just... ahhh... give you some alone time to process this *backs out of room*

---

[Thor and Loki laying in bed staring at the ceiling]

Thor: do you ever realize that Mother and Father must’ve had sex at least twice 

Loki: disgusting. abslutly absurd. unwarranted behaviour. please never talk about it again. I will not acknowledge any weird stuff. 

Thor: but if they hadn’t you wouldn’t be here 

Loki: i appeared in the cradle fully formed

Thor: but--

Loki: Father found me by the side of the road with a tag reading ‘Odinson’

Thor: broth--

Loki: im adopted and you crawled out of midgard’s dirt.

---

Odin: I thought we could unite our kingdoms one day, bring about an alliance, bring about a permanent peace... through you...

Loki: *tearing up*

Odin: but those plans... no longer matter...

Loki: oh thank f*ck *wiping away tears*

Odin: beg pardon

Loki: Thor is going to be so happy to find out neither of us needs to get married

Odin: *starts falling into odinsleep* no...

Loki, ignoring him: well that’s one less issue to worry about. back to fretting over Laufey. and how bad a father Odin is.

---

Odin: you would be better served with what is in front of you *points at sif*

Thor: Training!

Odin: what? no!

Thor: thank you father. you are right, i should hone my skills. work on my ability in battle.

Odin: that’s not what i said--

Thor, nodding: a wise king never seeks out war. but must always be ready for it. 

---

Odin, dying: you have a sister...

Thor: YES!

Loki: this is perfect!

Thor: finally! someone else to take this burden!

Loki: THANK YOU!

---

Thor and Loki: we need you to take the throne--

Hela: i’m not interested

Thor and Loki: oh 

Hela: lmao why do you think the old man had no issue throwing me in space jail

[worstloki]

more low quality ace loki 

[worstloki]

me @ myth loki and comic loki: will sleep with anyone. anything. you think loki wouldn’t? try them. they will do it 150% can confirm. loki’s probably already done so at some point off-screen if not on honestly. did a horse once. loki’s just had so many flings no one ever bothered trying to keep track. there’s no point when the answer to ‘did you sleep with em’ is going to be a solid ‘ya’ (or in the rare case an ‘im planning on it’). 

me @ mcu loki: oh yeah he’s ace 

[worstloki]

Tesseract Origin

in light of further Tesseroki evidence I would like to remind everyone of the Tesseract’s first on-screen appearance in Captain America: The First Avenger where Mr Skull in his search for the Tesseract finds a cube, specifically finding it buried in a skeleton’s hands.

He finds it in a grave, that’s death imagery right there, and who do we know who is constantly returning from the dead and doesn’t even get his own funeral any of those times?

THen, it turns out the is a fake. A duplicate. A double. 

In case anyone else was thinking “faking a death” or “an illusory disguise” good job. Because the Tesseract was fake and was made of glass that looks a lot like ice? ngl they never reliably specify... and Skully Boy drops it, shattering the thing.

And THEN, there’s this huge image of Yggdrasil, RIGHT?? and there’s this snake at the base, and you know which of the realms is said to be towards the base of Yggdrasil? Because - and I’ll give you a hint - it ain’t Asgard. It’s pretty generally acknowledged that Asgard is towards the top with Midgard around the centre, so we can’t prove it’s any of the others, but it ain’t one of those two. 

We also get Reddie Kruger saying that “The Tesseract was the jewel of Odin’s treasure room,“ and I for one keep all the jewels my throne room far away from the throne room for no reason. In fact, I think that it’s completely reasonable to keep it in the throne room from the beginning of time until around the year when my adopted kid is born which is when I decide it needs to be moved far away from the throne room. Completely normal behaviour.

And, of course, in case the other references weren’t enough, let us not forget that pressing the eye of the snake, an image not at all associated with Loki (/s), reveals the actual Tesseract, ‘not meant for mortal eyes’. 

or that it’s supposed to be a dragon towards the roots of the tree so i may as well bring up ace loki (???) while i’m, here

That is all. Carry on. 

[worstloki]

Loki Is Ace™

[worstloki]

tony: what's your gender?

loki: don't have a gender

tony: oh, gotcha, 😎👍 what's your sex then?

loki: oh, none of that either

tony: p-pronouns? do you have THOSE?

loki:

loki: what is a 'pro-noun' 😳 and what is it meant to do... 😳

[worstloki]

loki: love is an imaginary dagger

me: so you're telling me that this is about loss yes but also absence? that loki would give out simple imagery? that even in a conversation about love on a planet named after lamenting loki agrees there was nothing ever real amongst princesses or prince? that he made show of Love Is Hate? that Loki describes love as a weapon to be wielded far away or up close, as something he can see himself a part of until anything is meant to be done? that he ended his entire monologue on love with the message of it not being real while the sharp end of the dagger pointed at his own chest? that he sings a song in Asgardian of being wanted by family after a conversation about romance? that he said love isn't mischief and then later tried to cover by saying he's hedonistic when fun with deviance is relevant in both scenarios? you're saying none of this has anything to do with being aspec? ok.

[worstloki]

loki puts the ace in menace

[worstloki]

Loki: I'm asexual

Tony: ..............you DON'T f*ck?

Loki: I--

Tony: What exactly do you do with all that spare time?!?!

Loki: I don't--

Tony: ohmygod no wonder you attacked the planet!!