#Macgyver in prison

[dinosaurswant2rule]

also written for @febuwhump

The prompt was 'bite down on this'

Happy Febuwhump all

[swanluvrr]

It's me, I'm the girl

[glamgoths]

MADE SOME NEW STICKERS!! Bob, Murdoc, and Johnson!

ETSY LINK HERE

[capondi]

An updated version of my David Dastmalchian characters + “I want a baby” meme post

[anguishmacgyver]

[how-serene]

They Came From Outer Space

Scenario - What surviving the killer klowns would be like with Abner Krill, Bob Taylor and Murdoc.

A/N - it had to be done.

ABNER KRILL - This is an interesting case. Due to Abner's abilities, there's a chance the klowns will find him fascinating. Also doesn't help the colorful nature of Abner's powers are what draw them in. He will be silently freaking out, holding onto your hand the entire time. Although he has the ability to protect you, this wasn't a situation he was ever prepared for. You will have to drag him along at first, as you two run for your lives. He'll be so caught up in his head, staring like a dear in the headlights at everything. It takes your voice softly cooing his name, bringing him out of that dazed headspace. From then on, you two become extremely protective over one another. If you're separated for even a second, Abner will break down, causing his powers to flare up. As long as your palm is in his, he believes you two might survive. This deep need to protect you (and himself) will encourage him to use his powers when necessary. You have a high chance of surviving this situation with Abner.

BOB TAYLOR - Oh honey.... he's not leaving the house. He would look to you for protection, and just a general sense on what the hell to do. Bob would be panicking, more so than usual, and will become engrossed in his coping mechanism to help. There will be moments where he'll silently breakdown and cry, mumbling incoherently to himself. It's on you to help break him out of that (gently) while simultaneously trying to barricade the house. Just tenderly brush back his hair, while reassuring him that you'll both be alright. On the other hand, I can imagine him becoming extremely clingy. Bob would be following you around the house, trying to ignore the mayhem happening just outside his front door. He becomes your shadow almost, his hands constantly grabbing for your shirt to hang off of. He wouldn't speak a lot during this time, as he's trying to process...everything. You have a small chance of surviving this ordeal with Bob.

MURDOC - If there's one person who's getting you through this, it's Murdoc. Realistically, he's probably one of the first people to figure out how to kill them in the end. His general protective nature would be dialed to 100% around you. While he wants you behind him, to ensure you're okay, he wants to make sure you know how to handle yourself in case he's not there (which is unlikely to happen, this man is glued to your hip). Expect a basic 101 self defense training session, that leads him to become a little distracted by you. Murdoc will be making several clown puns/jokes (to distract from the incredibly strange and horrifying scenario you two are in). You might think he's not taking the situation seriously enough, but he is believe me. This man is locked in to every sight, sound and situation going on. He's aware of the dead silence of the birds, to the terrorizing screams from the neighbors. Survival is almost guaranteed with Murdoc.

[ariminiria]

hmm trying to decide if this should be a multi chapter

[hoss-acm]

Can anyone name the episode this art is inspired by?

Let me know if you like this, or would like to see more of my art.

~have a great day~

[appalachianapologies]

[random drabble to get you through the day]

“I was able to hack her stuff pretty easily.”

“That didn’t take long.” 

Riley sends Mac a look. “I’m sorry, have we met? Riley Davis, hacker extraordinaire.”

Rolling his eyes, Mac replies, “You know what I mean. What’d you find?”

“The usual. For a double or triple or quadruple—or whatever type of agent she is—Nikki doesn’t encrypt her files as much as she should. I’ve already sent the juicy stuff to Patty.”

“Nice.” Giving a nod, Mac pulls a spare wheeled chair toward Riley’s desk and sits down. “What’re you doing now, then?”

“Oh, just having some fun.”

“Should I ask?”

“Probably not, but I’ll tell you anyway.”

With a poorly contained smile, Mac says, “Go for it.”

“After getting the goods out of her laptop, I hacked into her phone. Weakest wifi password in the history of ever, by the way.”

“Noted.”

“And she’s been listening to Spotify for the past three or so hours, so if I were to guess, she’s probably doing some other task while listening to music in the background.”

Mac gives another nod, still not exactly sure where this is going.

“So, like I said, I decided to have a little fun, and I wrote up some quick code this morning before you and Jack got here.”

“Code for what?”

“Basically,” Riley starts, “I made it so randomly in the middle of her songs, Spotify will pause itself.”

“Is that… it?”

“Yep.”

“Riley, what the fuck?”

Turning her head away from the monitor, she looks at Mac. “What, I can’t have some fun? When I wasn’t doing hacktivist stuff, this is basically all I’d do.”

A stuttered laugh escapes Mac before he can stop it. “I don’t think I’ve ever seen this side of you.”

“She’s been dormant for a while,” Riley confirms, “but I think it’s time I bring that part of me back.”

[lailuhhh]

Okay no but I’d’ve loved if we had a Macgyver episode told from someone else’s pov

I mean you can argue that it’s no one’s specific pov throughout the show because of the switching storylines but

Mac was the one that narrated episode openings also the show is literally his name but hey we’re being deeper than that

[dinosaurswant2rule]

More re-writes inspired by @febuwhump

This is written with the day 1 and day 2 prompt in mind

Helpless and solitary

Happy febuwhump all!

Ooh just as a note, the re-write/febuwhump only extends to the first paragraph break, the rest of it is previous content

[renhaswritersblock]

Some doodles of a few Dast bois

[tofuxtea]

𝟕:𝟎𝟒 𝐚𝐦 | 𝐖𝐈𝐂𝐊𝐄𝐃 𝐆𝐀𝐌𝐄𝐒

𝐩𝐚𝐢𝐫𝐢𝐧𝐠 — murdoc (2016) x fem!reader

𝐰𝐚𝐫𝐧𝐢𝐧𝐠𝐬 — nsfw, explicit, reader needs something, murdoc wants something in return, oral (fem!receiving) murdoc is an asshole, hair pulling, quickie (?), face fucking, panty stealing, murdoc uses readers panties, lowkey nose kink lol, clit sucking, tongue fucking, slight overstimulation

𝐧𝐨𝐭𝐞𝐬 — NOT PROOFREAD! literally stayed up til 7am to finish this bc i refused to not finish it. i had this idea when i watched like the second episode he was in and i couldnt get it out. also i need more david dastmalchian esp jack delroy, murdoc, johnny, and james lewis moots pleasepleaseplease

you were pissed. that much was obvious when you stormed into the prison with a slim folder between your tense fingers and a scowl etched into your typically stoic features.

you had demanded the guards get him into the interrogation room before you got there and told them to keep away from the door for the next hour. though they weren’t allowed to do so, they refused to fall into your vicious crosshairs.

they did as they were told, and the second you swung open the door to the stuffy, metal room you were met with a smug grin and taunting stare.

neither of which wavered even when you slammed the manilla folder onto the table in front of him and used that same hand to backhand him right across his cheek. your fingers closed around the collar of his plain white shirt before he could fully process the strike and you forced his body back upright. his handcuffs rattled with the motion. the proximity should have scared him.

“you sold us out?” your voice bounced off of the walls like a gunshot had rung out. but murdoc didn’t flinch. instead, his smile steadily grew until he was laughing in your hands.

honestly, you should have expected this. the consequences of trusting a sociopathic assassin like him. known for lying about any and everything, completely indifferent about who he hurts and the amount of chaos he creates.

you made the stupid mistake of placing what should have been the satisfying wrap-up to a very important mission in his hands and ended up getting double crossed, and your coworker and good friend almost killed. in whatever time murdoc had between your meeting with him and what was supposed to be a surprise confrontation, he gave away every last detail to whoever knew of your connections with him.

luckily, the phoenix foundation had never known a loss thanks to macgyver. he narrowly managed to flip the score and gain the upper hand in a heavily disadvantaged fight, giving your team just enough room to make just a few arrests. the rest were able to escape.

but despite the half victory, you knew it wouldn’t happen every time. so you had to remind your little informant who he belonged to.

your hold tightened on his shirt, and finally his cuffed wrists rose as a meek defense. “oh, come on sweetheart. i’m flattered you thought so highly of me, but i’ve told you before. my service only goes to the higher bidder now.” his voice was calm and condescending. it pisses you off.

you held him still for several seconds, debating on painting his cheekbone purple before shoving him back into his chair. it was so forceful, you heard the thin legs grit and scrape against the ground. murdoc chuckled lowly. “you’re strong for such a small thing, aren’t you?”

your eyes shot daggers into his own, but you control yourself. the team would only fall into deeper shit if you pushed him into a non-verbal state. they were relying on you, even if they had no idea you had come back here.

“you’re going to tell me who these people are, and where they might’ve gone.” you instructed, voice low and sharp. murdoc’s eyebrows twitched upwards as you flipped the folder open and spread several papers onto the table.

he glanced down at them, eyes shifting left and right like he was tracking a moving dot. “need i remind you? again?” his empty brown eyes came back up to you. his smile returned. “why should i?”

right. payment. in truth, you had shown up completely empty handed, boldly praying that you could get him to comply and the answers would merely fall out of him. maybe a punch or two. but this was murdoc. he felt nothing.

your jaw tightened when you came up with nothing. he seemed to sense that before you could say it and he scoffed out a laugh. “oh, then i’m afraid you came all this way for nothing, sweetheart.”

that was the second time he’d called you that. it felt almost dehumanizing coming from him, especially paired with the not-so-subtle observation he stole of your figure. though, it seemed to strike something in him, and the corner of his lips lifted.

“you know, i might be willing to settle for a second place offer.” murdoc held your gaze with a newfound intensity, his eyes narrowing ever so slightly. dealing with many men in your profession, you knew that look all too well.

your stomach lurched. though you couldn’t tell if it was in a nauseating or interested way, seeing as your stomach suddenly tensed so badly it really could have been either. the man was attractive, there was no denying that. but still, you’d never pictured a situation like this with him before.

murdoc tsked at your shock. “i have needs.” he said matter-of-factly with a small shrug. his handcuffs clinked against his chair.

“i thought you had to be human for that.” you shot back.

every bone in your body told you to pack the file back up and leave him hanging. that was what your best judgment was screaming at you to do. not to entertain a maniac like him and put yourself at such a risk. but for some reason your feet were glued to the floor. you couldn’t move.

murdoc actually looked offended by your words, but the expression didn’t reach his eyes. “i can be as human as you need me to be. just say the word.” his voice dropped, suddenly teetering towards gravelly. “you need something, i want something. my prices really don’t get this low, you know.”

knowing murdoc, his idea of ‘needs’ was bound to put you in some compromising position. you shouldn’t. you really shouldn’t. but the way he was looking up at you with what could only be described as pleading eyes forced your refusal back down your throat.

then, his lips spread into a victorious grin. you noticed his sharp canine fangs for the first time. “good girl.” he breathed. he shifted to face you, reaching out to inch you closer to him with one hand. the distance between you two was already microscopic, but it got even thinner as he gently eased your legs in between his parted knees.

the chain that bound his wrists together granted him far too much leeway, you noticed when he planted his hands on either side of your waist.

your clammy palm pressed onto the table’s surface beside you to balance yourself, finding your guard was beginning to slip away. a heavy sigh escaped from your nostrils and your eyes squeezed shut while you took in your position.

you could back out now, you thought. there would be no shame in it. you’re only caught up in the moment now. he stunned you. that was all. you didn’t have to do this. you didn’t want to do this, you corrected, more loudly in your head this time.

murdoc’s fingers began to massage your hips over the skirt of your form fitting black dress, drawing you out of your meditative space. your eyes found his when they snapped open, and murdoc hummed.

“no need to worry, sweetheart. i know what i’m doing.” like that made you feel any better. he also knew what he was doing when he killed dozens of people.

you let a sigh slip past your lips when his hands traveled downward, inching towards the hem of your dress. “if i didn’t know any better, i’d say there were two guards behind that door. but there isn’t, is there?” he asked lowly and knowingly, shooting a glance over to the locked door you had come in from.

your response was reluctant. if you told him he was right, he could easily use his position to overpower you and get out. but if you let him believe the guards were there doing their job, would he stop? you looked down at him, then down where his hands were gently massaging your upper thighs.

“no, they’re not.” you replied truthfully.

“good.” murdoc quickly replied. he moved you so that you stood in front of the table. your expression shifted to one of curiosity. “you can be as loud as you’d like.”

your face flushed hot at his words. how he said them so casually and cockily despite being (almost) completely at your mercy.

his fingers hooked onto the bottom of your dress and pulled it up to your waist, sighing with admiration as he took in the sight of your black panties. you gasped at the abrupt exposure, wanting to pull the bunched up fabric back down your thighs. but the sudden sensation of murdoc’s fingers rubbing at the dampened crotch of your underwear caught you off guard and you let out a whine.

“that’s it,” murdoc groaned when your thighs instinctively parted wider for him. he traced up your wet folds through the thin fabric, stopping at your clit to circle it. your chest filled with a sharp gasp and you cried out, legs going near slack. “good girl.”

your hips bucked shamelessly into his fingers, desperately trying to match his steady rhythm. “shit, shit,” you gasped, fingers curling around the edge of the table. your head fell back between your shoulders, strained whines falling from your lips.

murdoc quickly stole your building-up orgasm when he took his hand away to slide your panties down your legs and plant himself onto his knees before you. he whisked the garment away but you didn’t entirely care. the sight of him made you blink, realizing what he was about to do.

this was what he meant by wanting something? honestly, you had expected him to bend you over the table or have you straddle him on the chair.

“go on.” he gently nods towards the table behind you. hesitantly, you pull your dress down to cover your ass before hoisting yourself up onto the edge. you wince at the cold that seeped through the thin fabric meant to protect you. the rest of it bunched up at your hips.

murdoc’s hand slipped behind your thigh, holding it in place, the chain lightly digging into your skin as he brought his other one up to rub at your inner thigh. you waited for him to tend to your aching cunt again, but it never came.

you looked down at him, growing irritated. “what do you need me to do?” he asked far too sweetly for your liking. you glowered at him, but he didn’t give in. “don’t forget, you’re the one who needs something.”

bastard. he was going to make you say it out loud. humiliate you for a little bit, even if he was painfully hard in his orange jumpsuit. he had patience like no other, so he would get his way.

you swallowed what was left of your pride and responded, “please, make me come.” your words held bite and lacked the lust that coursed through you. and although murdoc looked like he was going to make you answer correctly for a moment, he shrugged.

“since you asked so nicely.” he said sardonically before he planted his mouth onto your cunt. the response was immediate, a startled cry of his name falling from your lips and your thighs tensing around him.

his tongue delves into your cunt, working you slowly and skillfully. you press a shaky hand to your mouth to try to keep yourself relatively quiet, but it’s like he knows exactly how you touch yourself at home in bed. he’s hitting every spot, and the vibrations of each of his moans make your back arch.

“murdoc—” his name sounded so strange when you weren’t cursing it to hell and back. “—fuck, don’t stop,” your hips rolled against his mouth, the tip of his nose prodding at your clit. you risked it and carded a hand through his hair, taking a handful of dark locks and tugging. he moaned, louder this time, and his knuckles whitened as his grip tightened on your thigh.

you watched as his eyes fluttered shut, practically losing himself in your pussy. he shifted to sucking on and licking at your clit, reveling in the way your cries got higher and more frequent, and how your body writhed wildly against his face. then he’d move back to devouring you, messily and loudly.

your hold on his hair went icy and you pushed him deeper into your cunt, thighs spreading impossibly wider. murdoc whined at the assertion, peering up at you through hooded eyelids.

the sight was obscene, burning itself into your vision forever. the feeling would, too. you hadn’t received anything like this in years, especially not from your silicone and rubber replacements at home.

it’s then that you notice that he’s breathing too hard — or rather, moving far too much — and that he’s slowed down significantly. and that his hands have left both of your thighs and had gone back to his lap. one still loosely held your calf, you realized, but the other worked at his stiff cock. you couldn’t see it, only the rapid up-and-down of his fist.

it wasn’t because of his jumpsuit, which he had worked open at some point, but because also in his hand was your panties. it should’ve disgusted you. watching murdoc jerk himself off and using your panties to do it.

but instead your breathing went ragged and you moaned. “fuck, fuck, murdoc!” he groaned in response, his tongue delving into your pussy in slow, deep drags. he didn’t care that you’re fucking his face now, or that he can’t breathe. he was chasing his own high, fisting his dick with your panties and listening to your relentless cries.

you cursed and cried out as the coil tightened in your gut, feeling like your body was about to explode if he didn’t stop. you didn’t want him to. so you held his mouth against your cunt, hips jerking sporadically as you finally came on his tongue. you felt murdoc’s lips curve into a smirk against you, but you didn’t have the strength to care.

instead, you let him fuck you with his tongue through your blinding orgasm, gently rolling your hips in time with his languid thrusts. you tilted your head and peered down at him, watching him get himself off with your underwear.

you wished you’d worn a sexier pair, but the stirring in your stomach was still there. just knowing they were yours.

a weak moan slipped from you when the sensitivity started to catch up with you. murdoc kept going, still licking up your first orgasm. “holy shit, murdoc,” you slurred, a second orgasm quickly building.

your head fell back and your fingers ran through murdoc’s hair, tousling it even more. but he persisted now, shifting to messily work at your clit. the noises were obscene, and the shame was beginning to set in, but once you looked down and caught his gaze, it was gone.

his nose poked at your abdomen while he sucked on your sensitive nub, and spit and cum glistened around his mouth. you held the contact for only a moment before you came for a second time on his tongue, and telling from the trembling moan he let out right after, he did too.

he pulled away after a second, both of your heavy panting filled the room. you could barely hold yourself torso up, you couldn’t even imagine standing up yet. so you stayed propped against the edge of the table while murdoc cleaned himself as best as he could.

“you can keep them.” you mumbled before he could even try to give you your panties back. but the man only blinked at you.

“i know.”

the anger from before threatened to return. god, he was such an asshole.

“that wasn’t so hard, was it?” he asked with a smug smirk as he wiped your cum from his face with the back of his hand. the action made you gulp, and the way he was staring at you, still on the ground, forced you to your feet and to the other side of the table.

you had to put distance between you and him or you’d end up shoving his face right back between your legs again. and you would rather die than have murdoc know that you wanted him to tongue fuck you again.

“right, now, can you give me what i need?” you asked, hurrying to rearrange the shuffled papers on the table.

murdoc got back up into his chair, watching you compose yourself with amusement. “that depends, sweetheart.” he replied. “what do you need? names or another round?”

did this in one sitting ur welcome. god i love david dastmalchian. so much. also i might write a part 2 to this.

[polkadotjohnson]

Because I'm greedy and I just watched something I hadn't previously, I decided I want more. So I'm gonna post two lists, one of the things I've watched in case you haven't watched some of it and I can help, and one of the things I'm missing so maybe you can help me! Please help me feed my obsession its hungreee

Stuff I've watched (most from the imdb list, other things found in the wild) excluding interviews, podcasts making ofs and red carpets:

Early Edition (tv)

The Dark Knight (movie)

ER (tv)

Horsemen (movie)

Last Seen Wearing (short)

Virgin Alexander (movie)

Gateway (short)

Love is an Elevator (short)

Sushi Girl (movie)

Brutal (movie)

The League (tv)

The Cross (short)

The Assassination of Chicago's Mayor (short)

Saving Lincoln (movie)

The Employer (movie)

Ray Donovan (tv)

Heavy (short)

Prisoners (movie)

After Thought (short)

CSI: Crime Scene Investigation (tv)

Animals (movie)

AVGN: The Movie (movie)

Intruders (tv)

CSI: Cyber (tv)

Chronic (movie)

A Killer of Men (short)

Ant-Man (movie)

12 Monkeys (tv)

A Quiet Kind of Love (short)

The Belko Experiment (movie)

Be Good (short)

Gotham (tv)

Twin Peaks: The Return (tv)

Blade Runner 2049 (movie)

Galaktikon: Nightmare (music video)

Relaxer (movie)

Ant-Man and the Wasp (movie)

The Domestics (movie)

A Million Little Pieces (movie)

Making Love (short)

All Creatures Here Below (movie)

Bird Box (movie)

Neurotica/Eureka! (short)

Madness in the Method (movie)

Teacher (movie)

Jay and Silent Bob Reboot (movie)

Reprisal (tv)

Lacrimosa (short)

MacGyver (tv)

The Flash (tv)

The Suicide Squad (movie)

Dune (movie)

Immoral Compass (tv)

Weird: The Al Yankovic Story (movie)

Ant-Man and the Wasp: Quantumania (movie)

Boston Strangler (movie)

The Boogeyman (movie)

Miracle Workers (tv)

Oppenheimer (movie)

The Last Voyage of the Demeter (movie)

The Rookie (tv)

Late Night With the Devil (movie)

Shortcake (short) (thanks again @thepurpleprince)

Others (?)

Keep Painting, Mom (short/archive)

The Balcony (short)

Elton & Jean’s 9th Grade Biology Project (short)

Failure - Dark Speed (music video)

Iceage - Catch it (music video)

Iron & Wine - Everyone's Summer of '95 (music video)

Ken Andrews - Sword and Shield (music video)

Passion Pit - Constant Conversations (music video)

Puddles Pity Party - Obsession (music video)

X.X.T. - Steve Jobs (music video)

Annabel Lee (reading)

2021/2022/2023 Fangoria Chainsaw Awards

Premature (show)

Awkward Breakfast/Lunch/Dinner Conversations (special)

Svengoolie - The Wolf Man (cameo)

Svengoolie - Inner Sanctum (cameo)

Svengoolie - War of the Colossal Beast (didn't see him in it)

The Boulet Brothers Halfway to Halloween Special

The 101 Scariest Horror Movie Moments of All Time (documentary)

In Search of Darkness 3 (documentary)

I Am Not a Flopper (narration)

CCARS - Fire (um… music… video?)

Mermaid - a Short Film (short)

If you haven't seen any of these let me know and I'll give you the link or upload it somewhere or something

Now all the mysterious stuff I can't seem to find anywhere:

Arc of a Bird (saw a clip on Vimeo) (short)

Credits (short)

Head Case (short)

Band (short)

Keen (short)

Double Black (short)

Say When (short) <- doesn't fucking exist (still mad about it)

Tweet Me in NY (short)

Singled Out (tv pilot?) <- watched it

Sketchy (tv) <- watched it

Cass (movie) <- watched it

Under the Pyramid (movie) <- watched it

Cora (short, unreleased 😢) (hehehehehe)

Girls Will Be Girls 2012 (also unreleased)

The Pandora Experiment (also also unreleased)

All the Pretty Girls (??? prob unreleased)

A bunch of other stuff probably. Any help would be immensely appreciated.

[anguishmacgyver]

[clevervonskelli]

Meanwhile, in a prison camp for air force personnel:

"I need these parts for a radio, think you can get them?", a beautiful nerd asks.

Morally flexible bff with just the right shady connections: Say no more, babygirl!

*cue WWII MacGyver montage*