#Many people think Haruka would kill himself and so do I which is why I wanted to do a parallel but I wish nobody will be killed (yet?) | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

petrichoraline · 1 year

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🔥 choose violence ask game 🔥 thingy

2,12,23 and 25

choose violence ask game!

2. a compelling argument for why your fave would never top or bottom

i feel like a fish out of water here wow. i keep going through my faves and they all seem like they'd do both? like im thinking about one straight couple and even there things could get interesting but anyways

naoya from mr.unlucky is never doing either cause with the tempo at which kouta is moving they'd both die from old age before they ever get there

masumi and ritsu from bokushoku both love their dynamic (and why wouldn't they, they seem to be having the most enjoyable sex ever) and they're never changing partners so they're defiinitely sticking to their roles (ig masumi could be curious cause yknow how ritsu is basically his only partner ever but i doubt ritsu would be down? and also if the end of the world didn't get them to try switching i don't think it's likely to happen)

12. the unpopular character that you actually like and why more people should like them

as i said, i take so many outcasts under my wing lol like the more hated he is, the more i empathise. like LM mark or even tonhon (i KNOW)

this question implies it's someone people are feel neutral/negative towards so i'll ignore my boy jiha from all the liquors though i haven't seen an ounce of love for him because i just think the show didn't get posted about much in general. he is cute, he keeps it real, he is the bestie the gives advice but actually sucks at relationships, low sense of self-worth - he's just perfect. and also those lips boyy he's so beautiful. anyways

i kept this question for kim actually but now that i'm here i wonder if i should even bother. like people have had a long time to sort out their feelings.

this just kind of ties with my dislike(?) of porschay, people just ganged up on kim as if the way he acted wasn't an act of protection - a poor choice but coming from a good place nonetheless. in my eyes he's such an antisocial loser that he's not that much more mature than chay who, in some way, i'm sure could outsmart kim easily, not to mention manipulate him if necessary. so with the whole pathetic factor going on idk how at least the tumblr fandom didn't instantly get his pov. i saw so many threats against this guy even long after the finale had aired, some were like ''i get it but i still want to smash him with a hammer for hurting chay'' which ok fair ig if you love porschay i can see where the anger comes from. but still. kim has grown up around the mafia, learnt to always keep his guard up. he tries to solve a mystery all by himself except for the help of a bodyguard who, ultimately, works for his dad, not for him. who can he trust except for himself? he's in the entertainment industry, ppl are interested in him for his family, looks, money or his fame. what he can give them. when he ain't sniffing around and wrecking his brains, he's in the recording studio. that man does not know how to act around his crush, we know how he subtly he gets info out of chay or how he's delighted to see a wall plastered with his face. that man is pathetic, lonely, paranoid, he'd kill anyone who's a threat to chay instantly (>leaves like a dozen corpses in a bar similar to a cat bringing rats to its owner) but will wallow in misery, write a song and serenade him through a text. HE DOES NOT GET HUMANS. he went to that bar, got told off and stormed off, he is so clueless, somebody please help him.

i actually read plenty of posts on kim and that's why i feel strongly about him (thank you everyone who defended him in such articulate ways❤️) and i don't even like him that much!! i just need the hate train to stop

23. ship you've unwillingly come around to

i know what the question means but like i usually try to like ships, it's easier this way, no? lol so it's not really unwillingly..but i think haruka and rin is a good answer lmao

i was a haruka/makoto girlie for years but watching free! with friends made me realise the harurin appeal

25. common fandom complaint that you're sick of hearing

i thought i wouldn't have much to say here but omg i have to pick just one? skipping over the controversial ones, i'll have to go for hate for songs in bls lol

i'll start off by saying a lot of my mutuals are of this opinion and i respect it <33 that being said - bro. i know they could be a bit much especially when the actors aren't that good or the song is a bit bland or if it just feels very out of place? i understand it's sort of become the norm to hate on these performances because '''bl boy whips out guitar'' is a fandom joke at this point. and people are so loud and proud about skipping every single scene with a song in it. but it results in takes like "omg why did win and team sing their confessions they sounded so bad, so off-key, i barely made it".. that's the point? they are overwhelmed with emotions, snot is running down their face, after months of inner turmoil they finally reach the point where they just have to let it all out and yeah, the song would sound much weirder if they played a studio version on top of the footage lmao (example: the autotune on top of akkayan's bday performance that was so horrendous it turned out funny)

it's not that i haven't been tempted to skip through a boring song. i'm not saying it's a baseless complaint. i just find the way it's expressed usually annoying.

#kalii wove you miss you <3 #petri replies #ppg #ask game

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kotokoharrow · 3 years

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Case Study 001: Haruka Sakurai

Note that this analysis is based around my own views. I do not present my way of interpreting Haruka as fact, and I am sharing this to see if others agree with me. If you disagree, you are more than welcome to say so and we can discuss it!

Content Warning: This analysis contains discussion of: Animal abuse and death, child abuse and death, emotional abuse, child neglect, murder, flashbacks and nightmares. Please proceed with caution if you are sensitive to any of these topics!

Evidence List:

Haruka’s Profile

Haruka’s Voice Drama

Undercover

Weakness

Two Breaths Walking

Voice Line

Timeline Convo

Character Analysis

A young male prisoner, quiet with downcast eyes. During Es’ early interrogations, he offered only a few constrained words in response. However, he has gradually become more talkative, forming an emotional bond over the course of his interviews. Once one begins to converse with him, his gentle pre-disposition is revealed.

He has a meek temperament and, even in Milgram, does not appear to be dissatisfied. Barely manages to communicate with Es and the other prisoners. However, during conversations, as if some meaning is lost along the way, there is a disconnect.

Haruka is a teenager with a very low opinion of himself, shown in his attitude in his voice drama and the lyrics of his song. When he appears in Undercover, he is shown wringing his hands together, avoiding looking at the camera, and when he finally does shows an unhappy expression. These pieces of his body language show that he is an anxious boy.

Haruka doesn’t appear to be very bright, with his song being written in hiragana, and he struggles to follow along with everything that Es says to him in his voice drama. He even says himself that he isn’t very bright. However, this is likely a result of his mother’s treatment of him, as he hasn’t been allowed to develop as he should have.

The shot in Undercover that shows his room shows young children’s toys on the floor. This, along with his speech patterns, show that he remains in a child’s mindset, despite being 17 years old. I believe that this is due to him becoming ‘stuck’ at an age where he experienced a traumatic event as a child - the event that revolved around fireworks and the girl in his MV.

Haruka’s primary motivation is love. He was neglected and emotionally abused by his mother his whole life, and so has been deprived of the love that most people receive from their parents. Despite love being his motivation, he shows in his interrogation questions that he doesn’t really understand what it is - he just knows that he wants it.

While his primary motivation is love, Haruka’s primary fear is abandonment. He is also afraid of being deceived, which again ties into his fear of abandonment. Haruka believes that everyone will leave him when they learn what he has done, and also believes that he will bring misfortune to others. This belief of bringing misfortune to others is likely a belief that his mother gave to him.

Haruka avoids situations and things that remind him of his trauma, such as animals and small children. This, as well as imagery in his MV, his mother’s treatment of him and his general personality, lead me to believe that he experiences PTSD.

The kanji in his given name means ‘far’ or ‘distant’, which likely references his personality, and the fact that he finds it difficult to get close to and communicate with others, due to having been deprived of connections for most of his life.

MV Analysis

I believe that Weakness takes place after Haruka has committed his crimes, and that it’s showing events from his past in the form of nightmares and flashbacks, which is why they appear distorted and there is heavy symbolism. As a result of this, even what we see in the MV is ambiguous as to whether it really happened, as dreams are not always literal and even with flashback-type nightmares, key facts can appear different to what happened in reality.

At the beginning of the MV, we see Haruka sitting in front of a dressing table, looking at himself in the mirror. The table is likely his mothers, as the perfume bottles on it seem to belong to a woman. Behind Haruka, we can see a window that shows that it’s daytime, but when his reflection in the mirror changes into his younger self, we can see that it is night-time outside (with red sky and a full moon). As the image changes, I believe this is Haruka experiencing a flashback, or perhaps a sign that he is having a nightmare.

I also believe that Haruka experiences PTSD as a result of his mother being emotionally abusive and neglectful towards him. I believe that this mistreatment when he was a young child explains a lot of his current personality - his behaviour fits in well with the behaviours of people who survive emotional abuse (doubting his own perception of things, a very strong negative opinion of himself, fear of abandonment).

There are many lyrics in Weakness that I believe point towards Haruka’s mother being emotionally abusive. The notable ones to me are: ‘Tell me, why are you drifting away from me? / Tell me, why do you say it’s my fault?’ and ‘If I tried and couldn’t say it / You would get angry at me and say “You’re hopeless”’. I believe that these lyrics are directed at Haruka’s mother.

As for imagery in the MV, when Haruka initially falls backwards from the dressing table, he falls into the liquid from his mother’s perfume, which shows how her treatment of him has surrounded him. Later, while he’s walking alongside her happily, she barely looks back down at him, and when adult Haruka pushes his younger self back, the following image is shown:

I believe the drawing in the background is meant to be Haruka’s mother, and his cruel treatment of his younger self is meant to show that he has internalised his mother’s abuse, going on to blame and punish himself for what he believes she would blame and punish him for.

Later, it shows Haruka as a child watching the fireworks with a girl his own age, whose face is blacked out like his mother’s. While it’s not clear what exactly happened, something bad happened to the girl, and she vanished from his life.

This is pure speculation, but I don’t think that Haruka killed the girl. I think something bad happened to her - possibly she even died - and that Haruka blames himself for what happened, whether fairly or unfairly. I believe that what happened was traumatic to Haruka, and he tried to avoid thinking about the bad part by focusing on his memory of the fireworks, which is a part of his denial.

Later, Haruka is petting a dog with his mother. Then, he goes outside to search for the dog, and comes across the dog’s body. Initially, I believed that Haruka had killed the dog, and I still think that this is a highly likely theory, as yellow roses are seen (which in flower language used to represent jealousy), and the lyrics that play during this point are ‘You praised me by saying “You’re crazy” / Thank you, I’ll do my best’ which, to me, alludes to children acting out for attention when they are being neglected, because due to the lack of positive attention they begin to see all forms of attention as a good thing, including negative attention.

However, in the timeline conversations, there is an exchange between Haruka and Shidou where Haruka has bloodied hands, and he tells a concerned Shidou that it comes from a bad habit of his, that when he’s tense he clenches his fists and his nails dig into his palms, causing them to appear bloodied.

Shidou: Sakurai-kun...? Could you show me your hand? Haruka: Hei!? No, this isn’t... it’s n-nothing... Shidou: Lend it to me. ...Your palm is covered in blood. Let’s have it disinfected. This... has it always been like this? Haruka: A-ah... I-it’s a habit... W-When I feel tense I grip my hands really tight, and my nails...

This detail has caused me to wonder if Haruka didn’t actually kill the dog. We see child Haruka looking for the dog nervously, and then appearing horrified when he finds the dogs corpse, then he looks down at his hands and sees blood on them. We also only see adult Haruka bludgeoning the dog. It’s common for people with PTSD to re-experience trauma from different perspectives, or with details changed, so it’s possible that Haruka did not kill the dog.

However, at this point, I think either explanation could be possible, so I’ll leave both of those theories here and move on.

Later, when it shows adult Haruka strangling child Haruka, I believe that this is when Haruka’s Milgram murder takes place. Before he begins strangling his child self, he is seen looking at a memory of himself being ignored by his mother, and becomes enraged, lashing out at his child self and strangling him, seemingly in an act of self-loathing.

However, I believe that Haruka is actually murdering his mother, having finally snapped and let out all of his repressed feelings. After the murder is over, I believe that Haruka was so horrified by what he did, he went into denial - which is something he has practice from doing his whole life - and the details of what he did became distorted.

In conclusion, I believe the following:

The MV takes the form of Haruka’s nightmares, which is why it’s ambiguous, unreliable and distorted

Haruka was emotionally abused and neglected by his mother since childhood

Haruka didn’t kill the girl, but he does blame himself for what happened to her

EITHER: Haruka killed the dog to try and get his mother to notice him, OR Haruka didn’t kill the dog but still in some way blames himself for the dog’s death

Haruka killed his mother directly due to his repressed feelings of anger towards her for abusing and neglecting him

Haruka is horrified by what he did, and on some level is in denial of the facts of what happened

Misc Analysis

Undercover

Haruka’s bedroom has toys that would be more appropriate in the bedroom of a young child. This shows that he is mentally stuck in a child-like state. Interestingly, there is also a drawing of a tree with two snakes that also appears during his MV. I don’t know what this means.

Haruka is shown strangling Es, which backs up the idea that Haruka’s murder happened when he was shown strangling his child self. Haruka’s mouth is wide open, showing that his murder involved heightened emotion on his part. This wasn’t a cold and calculated murder, this was a spur-of-the-moment response to something.

Interrogation Questions

I’m picking a few notable interrogation questions to analyse. In general, though, Haruka’s answers were much simpler than Yuno’s, which shows his child-like mindset and difficulty in understanding things.

Q: If one of your wishes could be granted, what would it be? A: I want to be loved.

Pretty straightforwards. This shows Haruka’s core motivation is to be loved.

Q: When was your first love? A: I don’t know.

Q: What’s the difference between romantic love and just love? A: Don’t they both mean that you like someone?

Q: What’s your ideal date plan? A: I don’t understand.

Despite his core motivation being wanting to be loved, Haruka doesn’t understand much about love, due to having been deprived of it his whole life.

Q: What kind of person is your father? A: I disappointed him.

This is the only time we hear of Haruka’s father. I’d guess that his mother blamed Haruka for his father leaving them, and that’s why he believes that he disappointed his father.

Q: Have you ever had a pet before? A: I have not.

Q: What is your favourite animal? A: I don’t like animals.

Q: What are some things you can’t deal with? A: Small children and animals.

Haruka denies any incident that was traumatic to him.

Q: What do you think of your family? A: I love them.

Despite having been deprived of love from his mother, he still says he loves them.

Q: Tell us what you enjoy doing. A: I like talking with the other prisoners.

Haruka talks about what he’s been doing since coming to Milgram, which implies that he didn’t have much he enjoyed doing beforehand.

Two Breaths Walking

A song about a boy meeting a girl. The girl tries to teach the boy about life, but due to the boy’s mother having taught him about life wrongly, he struggles to understand, and as a result ends up hurting the girl.

With Haruka as the boy, the girl in his MV as the girl, and his mother as the boy’s mother, this directly parallels Haruka’s MV. There isn’t much to talk about, because the parallels are pretty direct. It backs up the idea that Haruka’s mother was abusive, teaching him wrongly through her abuse and neglect.

Voice Drama

Es: Now, let’s begin the interrogation. Prisoner Number 1, Haruka. Haruka: O-Okay… I-I’m sorry… Es: Huh? Do you have something to apologise for? Haruka: U-uh, no… I’m sorry.

This shows us Haruka’s submissive personality. This kind of apologising for any perceived fault is very common in survivors of emotional abuse, because they learnt in the abusive environment that their abuser could find fault in anything, and to lower the severity of abuse, they would apologise. However, as this level of apologising isn’t needed or expected in regular situations, when it carries over it stands out.

Haruka: Ah, uh, um… I didn’t understand whatever it was you were saying. It was difficult. Es: Huh? Haruka: Uh, um… I’m sorry. I’m not that bright. Es: Haruka. What age are you? Haruka: Um… 17 years old, I think. Es: You think? Haruka: Uh, well… I have no interest in my age… I’m sorry.

Haruka isn’t used to having to think for himself, which is also common in survivors of emotional abuse. Abusers try to make their victims dependent on them, they may try to make decisions for their victims, or in the case of abusive parents may speak for them and deprive their children of the ability to develop. Taking into account Haruka’s cover song, I think it’s likely that this was the case with his mother.

Es: The only name left that hasn’t been said is Amane. Haruka: A-Amane. Es: What’s wrong? Haruka: I-I’m not good with them. Children at that age. A-Amane is a good girl, but she brings back b-bad memories.

This is most likely referring to whatever happened with the girl in Haruka’s MV. Haruka avoids thinking about traumatic incidents, even in his nightmares he avoids the details of them. Avoiding triggers of traumatic events is a symptom of PTSD.

Haruka: It’ll happen sometime. I… I… Even though I try to be normal, everything gets ruined. You, everyone, if you knew me… If you knew everything that I did… I’m… gonna be abandoned, that’s bound to happen. Because I’m a selfish killer.

Due to his abuse, Haruka solely blames himself for everything that happens. It’s likely that his mother blames him even for things that weren’t his fault, so this thought process stuck. Haruka’s primary motivation is love, and his biggest fear is abandonment.

Glitched Voice Line

Then what should I have done instead!? Tell me! Tell me so even I can understand!

I believe that this line from Haruka is addressed to his mother who he killed. He felt that he had no way to gain her love, and he is looking to her to tell him what to do.

Other Theories

Twin Theory

A theory I’ve seen says that the child in Haruka’s MV isn’t Haruka as a child, and is actually his twin. I don’t think we have any evidence to support this. I think that, given how much of Haruka’s MV is made up with abstract imagery, we should be careful with interpreting it too literally.

Autistic Haruka Theory

I have no issue with people seeing Haruka as being autistic, however, all of the theories about him being autistic seem to come from an outdated view of autism. I am autistic myself, and while I can recognise a lot of autistic traits in Haruka’s behaviour, I don’t think autism is what they were going for. I think that Haruka’s ‘autistic traits’ are, instead, supposed to show that he’s in a child-like mentality after a trauma that took place in his childhood, and that his behaviour has been strongly influenced by his abusive mother. I believe we have evidence that points towards this specifically, but no evidence that points specifically towards Haruka being autistic.

Unexplained

Why does Haruka say that his hands bleed when he’s nervous and what connection does that have to the blood on his hands in the MV?

What is the significance of the necklace that Haruka wears?

What is the significance of the girl in the MV?

What happened while watching the fireworks?

Did Haruka kill the girl?

What’s the significance of the tree and the snakes?

Final Verdict

My Verdict: Innocent.

I’m very glad that the popular vote determined that Haruka was innocent! My major reasons for this are:

1. His MV is the most abstract right now - it’s unclear exactly what happened, so any judgement based on his crime is going to be difficult. 2. For Haruka to open up more, I think he needs to be reassured that he will not be abandoned. I think that Haruka’s second MV will give us more details, because we have reassured him that he will not be abandoned.

Thank you for reading this ridiculously long thing! I hope to write these for all of the prisoners, and eventually catch up to where we currently are with the voting! If you enjoyed my analysis, please consider sharing so it can reach a wider audience!

#milgram #haruka sakurai #sakurai haruka #deco 27 #deco27 #analysis #mine

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maddogofshimano · 3 years

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Bound in the Chains of Suspicion: Haruka and Hamazaki Board Game Event

Major Y3 and Y4 Spoilers

I was surprised to see these two on an event together! Haruka even gets to be the protagonist here

I was more surprised by how emotionally compromised I got about Hamazaki of all people. I mean, I’ve thought he was a cool character ever since Y4, but man! This is the most important part though: LOOK AT HER

I’ve been busy so self-care was writing things up in more of a summary form than doing line for line translations this time. Apologies for the likely higher number of errors than usual and less polish overall, I got this done with only a few hours to spare before the event ended

I do need to put a big honking Content Warning on this one for attempted sexual assault of a minor, in which a grown man twice demands to see Haruka’s panties and attempts to grab her when she refuses. I’m really not a fan of the writing choice to include this, but I’ve got it in here for completeness’s sake

Summary: Set during the time between Kiryu and Yasuko leaving Hamazaki in Okinawa and Haruka’s call to Kiryu the next day to tell Kiryu that Hamazaki had passed away in the hospital. Haruka grapples with whether or not Hamazaki is a bad person and if he’s trustworthy while attempting to save his life

<After the incident where Hamazaki drifted to Morning Glory from Okinawa Penitentiary No. 2.....> We're starting off with in-game events/dialogue, Hamazaki handing over the blackmail he took from jail and asking for Kiryu's help

Immediate flashback to earlier 3/9/2010, more in game events. The kids have just gotten back from a field trip to the woods. They had fun, and want Kiryu to come along next time. Kiryu tries to introduce Hamazaki, Haruka is not having any of it

She tells Kiryu to shut up and Hamazaki to stay the hell away from everyone. Hamazaki is hurt by this, but fully understands and agrees to keep his distance

Next we have the beach conversation with Kiryu where she asks if he’s going back to Tokyo and that she’s scared

Haruka's usually very polite but she keeps calling Hamazaki あの浜崎って人 which is like, "that Hamazaki guy" lol

Haruka's been told by Ayako that "that Hamazaki guy" has left with Kiryu to go to the police station. She's wondering why that guy is now trying to convince Kiryu not to go to Tokyo....... isn't there going to be a big problem if Kiryu doesn't go? Did Hamazaki tell Kiryu not to go..... for Haruka's sake? There's no way, right? A bad person like him wouldn't do something like that..... She can't trust him, but..... <Haruka flashes back to her yelling at Hamazaki and Hamazaki looking sad> She feels she might have been cruel to him

She thinks that Hamzaki just looked so so sad, so she tells Ayako she's going to head out for a bit and asks her to watch over things while she's gone. She thinks that she still can't trust Hamazaki but that maybe, it's possible he really has changed, and he's not such a bad guy anymore... but she can't be sure! So she's going to talk to him a little more

She shows the cop an photo of Kiryu and asks if he's come this way, as well as a big man with a shaved head and a scary face named Hamazaki. The officer says that they did, but went to help a lady look for her brother instead. He points Haruka in the direction they ran off in. She thanks him and wonders who this woman is, and remembers that Kiryu has a phone so she can just call him. Except she forgot her phone at morning glory...... thankfully there's a pay phone nearby, so she uses that instead. Kiryu isn't picking up though, which is worrying. She's sure Hamazaki must have done something!

She runs around the market with her picture of Kiryu asking people if they've seen him. A store owner says that yeah, he's seen that guy with the scary face, he was here not too long ago, and points her in the right direction. She follows the trail, talking to a homeless man, a younger guy, a tourist lady, and finally hitting a dead end and talking to a goon who says yeah, he's seen those three, but his memory's real fuzzy. Maybe he could remember if Haruka would show him her panties. Haruka is taken aback, he tries to grab her, and Haruka fights him off enough to escape. She hides nearby, and happens across someone bleeding on the ground. It's Hamazaki!

Hamazaki is bleeding badly, and collapses. Haruka thinks that she needs to call an ambulance, and fast, but she hears someone shouting in search of Hamazaki. She knows that if they come this way they'll be out in the open, so she starts dragging him despite him being heavy

the voice was of course coming from everyone's fave, Saito the Prison Warden

He knows that Hamazaki got shot in the torso, so he couldn't have gone far. Haruka wonders why Saito would try to kill Hamazaki. Unfortunately Saito decides that his subordinates are useless and that if he wants anything done he'll have to do it himself

He tells a homeless man that if they spot Hamazaki, Yasuko, and Kiryu he'll give them 100,000 yen, and the offer stands for any other homeless friends that help search. Haruka knows that she needs to get Hamazaki somewhere safe that they can hide, and fast. She thinks about it and remembers that right at the end of this alley there's an empty room that's never used that Taichi told her about. She manages to sneak herself and Hamazaki to the building without being spotted by the patrolling homeless men--but once in the building she finds that there's a homeless man inside. He tries to tell her to go play somewhere else but notices that she's dragging Hamazaki behind her, and starts shouting in hopes of getting the 100k. HARUKA ATTACKS THIS MAN. HARUKA OVERPOWERS THIS MAN. THIS MAN IS STRUGGLING TO GET AWAY AND HARUKA IS TELLING HIM HE CAN'T TELL ANYONE CAUSE THE PEOPLE LOOKING FOR HAMAZAKI NO OJISAN WILL KILL HIM

The man comments that Haruka's hands are shaking. He says he's been there too. When he worked as a day laborer, his hands would shake like that when he was desperately trying to haul heavy things. For the sake of helping an adult she's pushing her tiny body to it's limits... He agrees not to tell anyone, he's not going to be happy with any amount of money at the cost of someone's life. If any other homeless people come by, he's going to spread rumors that Hamazaki is far away from here, so that should help with Haruka's escape Haruka thinks again about calling an ambulance, worried that Hamazaki will bleed out, but still worried that they'll be found before it gets there. She also worries about why she hasn't seen Kiryu, and why Hamazaki was all alone at that building. The guy that shot Hamazaki seems like a cop and a bad person, but she had also thought Hamazaki was a bad person before... He did shoot Hamazaki, but Hamazaki also stabbed Kiryu...

Haruka wonders if maybe telling the cops where Hamazaki is would be the right thing to do. Maybe he's the real bad guy here. In response Hamazaki makes an eloquent argument compared to every previous line which had just been "Ughh gh ughh" and instead goes for "cough cough....!"

He's conscious enough to recognize Haruka as that kid who was at Kiryu's place. Haruka asks if Hamazaki is alright, and where is Kiryu? Is he okay? Hamazaki wheezes out that Kiryu's gone to a bad place, which is about the most ominous way to say things. Haruka panics internally, but unlike many other instances of miscommunication where Hamazaki would pass out right there, he says that Kiryu went with Saejima's sister to Tokyo. Haruka can't believe it. Hamazaki apologizes that he ended up separating Haruka from Kiryu after all.

Hamazaki also says that, despite everything, Kiryu's doing this to keep Haruka safe. Haruka wonders about that and Hamazaki collapses again. Haruka rushes off and calls an ambulance from the closest pay phone. She thinks that, if she trusts what Hamazaki is saying, then Kiryu has something important to do again. But is that really the case? She decides it'll be alright to trust Hamazaki. Before she makes it to the pay phone she's stopped by Saito introduces himself as a prison warden and says he's looking for a very bad man. He's large and has a shaved head, and was seen with a woman in a long coat and a man in a Hawaiian shirt. Haruka says she hasn't seen anyone, and rushes to the phone to call. Saito doesn't seem too convinced. Haruka makes the call and thinks that Saito had a real scary look in his eyes. She's pretty sure he's the bad one here. Once that guy gives up looking, then she can go home

Unfortunately we have the return of the disgusting creep that wants to look at her panties, now telling her that he looked all over for her, and she better not think about trying to run away this time. Haruka tells him to stay back

He says that it's fine if she hates him. In fact, that's even more enticing. She says to let her through, she's in a rush. He says he just wants to see her panties already, and tries to grab her. Another fight, she manages to avoid getting grabbed but he keeps her cornered and says she should stop fighting. He's cut off by a baton to the back of the head by the unlikeliest of heroes, dropping the creep

Haruka now has to consider, is it possible that Saito isn't actually a bad guy? Haruka leaves, and Saito comments to himself that he's going to find Hamazaki.

Haruka rushes back to Hamazaki, who is still lying on the floor going Ughhghghhhhh. She tells him to hold on a little longer, and ambulance is on the way. Hamazaki apologizes, and asks if she's alright. Haruka's confused. Hamazaki says that she scraped her knee on something, didn't she? It was from dragging him, right? She says no, she just fell and scraped it. Haruka's taken aback, even on the verge of death he's concerned about someone else--he really has changed. But... this could all be an act, she has no way to know... should she really be trusting him? There's a voice outside saying that this is where he's hiding. Search everywhere. both: !?

There's no time to hide, Saito is already here. Apparently it's been about 2 hours.

He followed Haruka, knowing she'd lead him right to Hamazaki. He saw the blood on her clothes and had a hunch. Once they talked at that pay phone he was certain she was hiding a half-dead Hamazaki somewhere. Haruka tries to protest but Saito thanks her for her help. It's a good way to thank him for saving her from that creep, right? Either way he only stepped in because he wanted her to lead him to Hamazaki as quickly as possible. Saito decides they've had enough chit-chat and says it's time to cut to the chase: he starts beating on Hamazaki and demanding to know where Kiryu Kazuma and Saejima's sister are

Hamazaki tells Haruka to run. He says that once they realize they can't beat the whereabouts of Kiryu and Saejima Yasuko out of him... they'll start torturing Haruka. He's going to use the last of his strength to stand and knock this guy to the ground, that'll be Haruka's opening to escape. Saito tells them to cut it with the whispering. Hamazaki says that Saito has a real hideous mug, it really makes him laugh, and earns himself another beating. Haruka calls out but Hamazaki cuts her off and says that it's okay to be scared. Hamazaki's dealt with plenty of guys like this. Saito threatens to kill him if he doesn't spit out where Kiryu is already. Hamazaki laughs and says he doesn't know. Saito asks if he needs his memory jogged, pauses, and sees Haruka standing in front of Hamazaki. He asks what she's trying to do. She says this is terrible! She can't let this go any further!!

Saito doesn't care if she's just a kid, he's happy to give her an attitude adjustment. Hamazaki launches himself at Saito to prevent him from beating Haruka, saying that he won't allow Saito to lay a single finger on this child. Saito attacks Hamazaki with intent to kill. Hamazaki can't move anymore after the fight, and Saito keeps hitting until he goes down. Saito declares that he would never die in a place like this, he's the one who's coming out on top. He reels back to strike Hamazaki, shouting for him to die, and........ HARUKA GRABS HIM AND STOPS HIM FROM HITTING HAMAZAKI! He calls her a bitch and tells her to let go of him!

Haruka: I won't let go....! Not ever.....! Hamazaki-san! Run!

Saito: Let go of me you biiiiiiiiiiiiitch! Saito turns to swing at Haruka but is taken down by one giant punch from Hamazaki, who tells him not to get back up. The ambulance finally arrives. Haruka begs him to hold on just a little longer. Hamazaki agrees, and laughs a little. He stopped Saito from laying a finger on her after all. He's glad he was able to protect her. There's on favor he needs to ask of her. Hamazaki: Tell Kiryu...... and Saejima that......... the Tojo Clan... is the only proof they ever walked this earth...... They have to... protect it....... from the police

He then collapses. Haruka begs him to hold on

The doctor tells Haruka that Hamazaki is in bad shape... he might not even make it to the morning.

Haruka thinks back to her yelling at Hamazaki at the orphanage Haruka: I'm sorry, Hamazaki-san..... I... I was cruel to you then... and now I can't even apologize to you for it. I'm sorry....... I'm sorry...... Hamazaki: ......What's.... wrong....... Haruka-..... chan........ Haruka: !? Doctor: Incredible.... he's awake! Haruka: H-Hamazaki-san.... I'm sorry! I... back then when I.... I'm can't apologize enough....... Haruka: Back at Morning Glory.... I didn't trust you.... I said some cruel things that hurt you.... I'm sorry! Haruka: I was certain you were a horrible person back then.... but now.... I don't think that's true.... Haruka: For protecting Uncle Kaz.... for protecting me.... thank you, Hamazaki-san! Hamazaki: Heheh.... thanks, huh? Hamazaki: ......First time.... anyone's ever said that kind of thing.... sincerely to me...... Haruka: Hamazaki-san...... Hamazaki: Heheh.... it's fine........ Since we're.... giving thanks to people..... Hamazaki: Thank you... Haruka-chan.... Right at the very end...... you saved me <Hamazaki collapses> Haruka: .....! H-Hamazaki-saaaaaan!!! <at New Serena, Kiryu gets a phone call> Kiryu: ....Haruka. What's wrong, did something happen?

Haruka: Uncle Kaz... Hamazaki-san..... he just passed away. At the hospital.

Straight from the in-game dialogue, Haruka tells Kiryu that Hamazaki had been shot in the back, leading to his death. He thanks Haruka for being there for him, she says it was no trouble, and that she thinks he died protecting Kiryu. Kiryu agrees. Haruka says she thinks she was wrong about Hamazaki, and passes along his message for Kiryu and Saejima, and lets Kiryu know that his body is currently at Morning Glory. Kiryu says they'll hold a memorial service once he's back <phone call ends> Haruka: .....Uncle Kaz. The Tojo Clan that Hamazaki-san protected... he's left it's protection to you. <END>

Bonus stuff:

as we all know, Haruka has not had enough people literally die in front of her eyes, so time to add Hamazaki to that list!

okay so immediately after Hamazaki wakes up in the hospital there’s this screen which made me break down into nearly crying laughter in the middle of the emotional moment, so I used my editorial authority to move it down here instead

the doctor’s face! why did they do this!!

Anyways here’s all of Haruka’s little blurbs from going around the board

Beach There's a beach in front of Morning Glory. We keep coming back to here to look at the ocean. It's an indispensable spot for all of us.

Morning Glory Our beloved home. When I first came here, I thought it was super spacious, but lately it feels cramped. It must be because everyone has grown up.

Hamazaki-san The guy who stabbed uncle Kaz.... But now, Hamazaki-san gives off a totally different vibe than back then. Is it really okay to trust him....?

Ebisu Pawn The Ryukyu branch of Ebisu. Uncle Kaz goes there every now and then. I have no idea what he's pawning off but... I'd like to help.

People Running Shakedowns Even in Okinawa there are people that will do shakedowns.... I need to tell everyone to keep an eye out before anything happens....!

Ojisan The caretaker of Morning Glory. Honestly, everyone truly thinks of him like their dad. If you tell him something like that however, he will get embarrassed.

Everyone at Morning Glory Everyone here has no parents, but each of them has a bright future ahead of them if they keep working hard. We've all become a real family for each other.

Sailor Outfit For my middle school I have to wear this sailor outfit. At first I would get embarrassed when everyone looked at me.

Mame A resident (pet?) of Morning Glory. Mame is getting bigger, and it's making his daily walks and pacing beforehand a real pain! (TL note: the resident (pet?) is Haruka swapping the counter between for a person and for an animal, which does not really have an english translation lol)

Dragon Mask When Taichi was sick, this was used for a pro wrestling match on the beach. I haven't seen it since then. If I ask nicely, I wonder if it could be used again?

That’s all! Thank you for reading all of this!! I cherish every single tag people leave on these posts when they reblog them

#yakuza #rggo #ryu ga gotoku online #Ryu ga Gotoku #Hamazaki #Haruka #Kiryu

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sabraeal · 3 years

Text

Provocateur, Prologue

[Read on AO3]

Written for @krispy-kream in honor of her birthday. Many years ago, back when I first joined fandom, I came up with the idea for an Obi Works For Izana AU, and both Sharon and I ended up writing small pieces of a much larger whole. And now FINALLY...I’m actually writing the very beginning 🤣

When it comes down to it, in terms of area and amenities, the royal dungeons has some of his last few flats beats.

There’s light, for one. He’s never liked basement apartments-- he’d take a stifling attic room over a place with only one exit any day-- but the windows here are high up on the wall, enough that he can watch the sun paint his cell floor as the hours pass. They’re ground level, at least by the foot traffic outside of ‘em, and with how loud these guards gossip, he’ll know whose girlfriends are pregnant and who’s nursing a nasty boil by shift change. Just like sitting in a tavern for a few hours, only with less ale.

There’s a cot too, straw-stuffed and a little too soft, with a blanket that doesn’t even itch. Seems like it might be warm too, for when the nights get cold. Not that he has an intention of testing out that particular hunch.

The guard down the hall is decent in the way authority figures never are; when he calls out to ask where his piss bucket is, the man-- boy? It’s hard to tell beneath those helmets-- ushers him down a hall to a water closet, and when he pops out, reminds him to take care to wash his hands. He’s prompt about mealtime too; when supper comes, the man says to expect three square and leaves him with with a dinner that would put most publicans to shame.

All in all, this isn’t the worst trouble he’s gotten himself into. Worlds better than that stint he’d had in Eurikenna’s gaol. Or that night in Port City.

Still, he’s got no plans to linger. No point in sticking around for a punishment when he's got no interest in redemption. But he’s got a prince to wait for.

Oh, His Highness might say he’s above getting his hands dirty, might look down that noble nose at a man like him who makes his living in trade, but he’d seen his look. Not the first, when his little mistress was watching, all puffed cheeks and disapproving brow, but the second, that glance over his shoulder as the Big Man frogmarched a dirty rat down into the dungeons.

That one was a man who had found the right tool for the job. Hands don’t stay clean without gloves to cover them, especially if they mean to hold a mistress who collects trouble like some ladies collect hairpins. If he wants to keep his side piece quiet, it’s only a matter of time before he’ll have to make a statement. And nothing says don’t touch what’s mine like a few accidents. All he has to do is wait out a royal conscience.

The light fades as he waits, just the last stretch of dusky light yawning on the sill. It’s almost time for all good little princes to be in bed, but this one-- this one will be working instead. The hand that grabbed him had been stained with ink and calluses both; the kind of man who longed for action but was stuck behind a desk. He’ll be up late, managing men and supplies miles away on paper, but in his head--

Oh, in his head, he’ll be thinking about the man he’s left to rot in the dungeons. The one that might be just the right fit for what he needs, for the jobs he can’t give that giant or the pretty girl at his side. It’s the sort of idea that’ll eat at him when the lamps are low and the night is quiet, and oh, how a conscience can gnaw when there’s no more work to feed it. There’s a reason he’s never idle. Not usually, at least.

He casts a long glance down the silent hall; the guard sits at his table, log book spread in front of him, another smaller one laid atop. A novel, by the slack-jawed look that’s slapped across his face. In Eurikenna, his reputation had preceded him, and they’d bound him hand and foot, bolting his wrists to the wall and his feet to the bench. Viande had put him in a cell with a single window and stone on all sides, his only escape leading into a moat rumored to be prowled by sharks.

Here he has a single guard and bars he could probably squeeze through if he skipped a meal or two. It’s insulting to be so underestimated-- or it would be, if he wasn’t already planning to stay. He’s paid out his room at the inn for a week; a few days to enjoy the impeccable food and passable mattress he’s got here won’t hurt-- just as long as he makes it back before the innkeep tosses all his worldly goods in the gutter. And if he does need to make a quick escape--

Well, it’s hardly the first time he’s slipped the noose. But it won’t come to that. Younger Highness is on the hook.

The door to the dungeon clanks open; it’s a softer sound, barely loud enough for him to hear, but he hasn’t made a name for himself by being the sort of person who only hears what he ought. The guard’s gone-- book too-- and his hand itches to have something that ends with a point in it. He should have known, this was all too easy.

A shrouded figure sweeps through the threshold, prowling with the easy confidence only men born to power possessed-- or a professional. His hands flexed, too empty. He’s a loose end, an embarrassing stain on a proud man’s reputation, and there’s only one thing to do with that-- rub it out.

“You’re not the prince,” he says, keeping his voice even, maybe a bit petulant. Boldness wins a bluff; all he needs is time. Just a second, a hesitation--

Which he gets; the figure’s boots scuffing to a stop. Its head cocks, curious. “Is that so?”

It’s a man’s voice, higher than he expects, but resonant. The sort that people listen to when they’re not looking for a way out. The sort that won’t care for a man turning his back on it.

“You’re too tall.” He saunters to his cot, the mattress sinking under his weight. Not quite the attitude he’d been hoping for, but close enough. Gives him enough time to realize his cloaked friend isn’t talking-- no, instead he catches the barest tremble of cloth before a gloved hand tugs it smooth.

“How...astute,” the man hums, a strange lift kicking that first vowel before he smooths that out too. Everything about this man is slick, from the shine of his boots to the way he says, “That must be the observational skills that tempted even the marquis to hire you.”

His grin flicks into a grimace, but habit wipes that all clean before he says, “I wasn’t hired by anyone. Just wanted to...advertise my skills. In case anyone with a fat wallet found themselves needing a problem taken care of.”

Another pause, this one heavier. “And this girl seemed like a likely target?”

“A commoner nosing around a prince?” A laugh huffs out of him. “What about that isn’t a problem? At least when it’s a lady, she doesn’t have pockets that need filling, but some little herbalist girl? There’s a long way between lady slippers and slippers for a lady. And not everyone wants to kiss hems to get a mistress in their pocket.”

Not when it’s just as like to be covered in mud. If there’s one thing he’s learned about these bluebloods, it’s that they only suck up, not down.

The shroud shifts, arms folding across a chest too slender to be called broad, and shoulders too wide to be scrawny. Lithe, perhaps, the perfect size to slip through a man’s guard.

“The job is over, you know.” Boot heels clack as the man draws closer, just enough to see a defined chin beneath the shadows of his hood. “There’s no need for all this cloak and dagger. Haruka has already confessed to the crown that he was the one to hire you.”

His fingers flex behind his head, longing for something besides bristle to cross his palms. “Don’t know why he’s going through all the trouble. I don’t know him.”

This isn’t his first interrogation, but it’s certainly the slowest. The man stands silently outside the bars, a single finger lying along his diamond-cut jawline. No questions, no speculation, just a shadow staring out of a hood, observing. This must be what it’s like to be boiled alive; put in the pot when it’s barely a simmer, the heat raising so gradually that it’s not until his chest is near bursting to speak, to fill the silence, that he knows he’s been cooked.

“What would you have done?” the man says, finally. “If you had your way with the girl.”

The girl who, in the face of danger, tore an arrow from the wall rather than run. “Nothing permanent.”

What little he can see of the shroud’s mouth curves. “How very vague. So many unpleasant things only take a moment.”

“The job was to scare her off,” he admits, wondering why his belly quivered in his gut. There’s bars between them, and his hands are faster than any nob’s, no matter how good the costume. But still, his muscles lay coiled against his bones, ready to strike. “Seduce her, if she seemed...amenable. Bribe her if she didn’t.”

“And what then?” It’s a quicker response than he expects, but the man isn’t agitated-- far from it, he’s never seemed calmer. “If the girl proved impervious to your more...gentle measures.”

There’s a question in that, one the shroud won’t voice. But he hears it, loud in his ears as a bell’s gong.

“I’ve killed before,” he says, each word on thin ice. “And I still sleep at night.” Barely. “I could have done it again.”

“But would you?”

For once, he hesitates. Imagines looking into those bright eyes, the ones that flamed so fiercely in defiance, and with the flick of a wrist, snuffing them out.

“It’d be a waste.” His hands tremble where they cradle his head, a command he hasn’t given them. This is the last thing he needs right now, losing control. “That girl’s got a lot of pluck. And if rumors around the pharmacy are right, a lot of brains too. Besides, bodies make more talk than bribes.”

“That they do.” There’s a lilt to those words, almost amused. “You know, you called it a job. Implying that you received compensation for your services.”

It’s a sting to realize he’s slipped. “Doesn’t mean it was the marquis.”

“It certainly doesn’t,” the man agrees, and if this room weren’t so dark, if this conversation wasn’t so serious-- well, he’d be tempted to say this guy is laughing at him. “Do you have a name?”

He turns to him real slow-like, one utterly dubious brow arched toward the guard’s register. “You want me to believe you can’t read?”

That shadow of a mouth lifts again. “Am I to believe a man of your skill gave your birth name to the royal guard?”

His mouth cocks into a grin. “You must if you think I’m gonna give it to you.”

The man comes closer still, one gloved hand wrapping around his bars. He’s visible to the tip of his nose; a long, patrician one.

“Of course. But you must have something you would like to be called.” His lips-- bowed, the most fashionable in Clarines’ court-- twitch toward a smile, but fall perilously short. “An alias, if you will.”

“Obi.” It’s too short, too quick, but already he likes it. It’s a more playful name than he’s had in a long while. Easy to lose, too, if he needs it.

“Well then, Obi.” His arm rests over one of the cross bars of his cell. “I believe I have a proposition for you.”

“Haah.” He hops to his feet, hoping to seize the high ground. “I appreciate the interest, but I’m already waiting on an offer.”

To say the hood recoiled would be an overstatement, it merely pulls back, barely more than an inch. “An offer?”

“Well, maybe more like...I have prospects.” Obi restrains his grin to little more than a twitch. “I just gotta see if they’ll pan out.”

The hood stills, thoughtful. “What if I could guarantee you a better offer?”

“You couldn’t.”

The man hums, amusement changing his pitch. “I quite sure I could.”

“Nah.” Obi shakes his head, almost wishing it weren’t so. This guy seems like he could be real fun, if he got his hands on his reins. “I don’t think so.”

“Please.” He opens a hand; an invitation. “Try me.”

“Fine.” There’s nothing to lose by telling, besides some face, if he’s wrong. Which Obi knows he’s not. “I got a feeling the next guy through that door’ll be His Highness.”

The man rocks back, like he’s been hit. “Zen? You think...?”

Obi expects some bargaining, some disbelief, maybe even some haggling, but--

He does not expect the laugh.

“Oh,” the man coughs, lifting a hand as if he might wipe tears from his eyes. “I promise you, I can give you a...far more attractive offer.”

Now that’s a rich one. “What could be better than a second prince?”

The man’s hand raises past his eyes, right to the edge of his hood. With the barest flick of his fingers, the cloth falls back, baring bright gold and Wisteria blue.

“Why,” drawls His Highness Izana Wisteria, crown prince, soon to be first of his name, “the first.”

#obiyuki #akagami no shirayukihime #snow white with the red hair #obi works for izana au #my fic #ans #listen it's obiyuki as a WHOLE but in this chapter there's just little hints #but truly this is just our excuse to have:#1) obi work with the smartest man in the manga and have his whole skill set utilized #2) enemies to friends to lovers #also torturing zen and obi with the friendship that could have been #that too #you know how it is

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trainer-stealthclaw · 4 years

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Drowning Through Time

Summary: With every timeloop that passes, Ayano, the Snake of Retaining Eyes, is pulled deeper into an abyss that feels all too much like one of her own making. Genre: Fantasy/Angst Pairing: Ayano Tateyama/Shintaro Kisaragi (mentioned) Word count: 1911 A/N: This is a counterpart to a previous fic of mine, Never-Ending, which can be read here. TW: Suicide mention

Read on FF.Net

She watches through his eyes. She recorded everything into his memories. Every time, he fails. Every time, the loop repeats.

Sometimes, he dies on his way home from the amusement park along with the rest of the Mekakushi Dan. Others, he's killed during the hostage takeover at the mall. Rarely, it’s in the sinister laboratory under the school…if he manages to get that far.

And then there are the times when he doesn't even make it to eighteen years, where he throws his own life away. Where she's forced to watch as he gives up on the world and everything in it, unable to turn her eyes away from the horrifying sight. And usually, it's all her fault. Those are the times she hates the most.

Ayano isn't sure how much more she can bear. The timeloops have been going on for so long, she'd lost count centuries ago. She isn't even sure if she really is herself, anymore. She had long ago given up her physical humanity, back when she had taken on the role of the Snake of Retaining Eyes, and whenever she speaks to Shintaro, in the few loops where he managed to awaken to her presence, she grows even more sure that she had given up her humanity in spirit as well.

Not that it mattered, she supposes. Nothing much does, anymore.

She watches as he speaks awkwardly to the version of her from this timeloop. Both of them fifteen, without so much of a guess as to what was waiting for them in that grim future.

The Ayano of this timeline smiles shyly, fiddling with her bright red scarf as she chats with Shintaro.

So innocent, Ayano thinks. She wonders what this other version of herself would think, if she knew just how many times her actions had led to countless timelines' downfalls, how many loops she had sabotaged by inadvertently breaking Shintaro's spirit with her eventual death.

Such an irony, really. Everything she has worked towards, everything that she had to sacrifice her own humanity for, was destroyed by none other than, well, herself.

She used to wonder what drove her counterpart to her death. One would think that technically being the same person would mean that she understood. But she doesn’t. The timeline that she had originated from is completely different from the ones she has seen, since becoming the Snake of Retaining Eyes.

She, herself, had never been Shintaro's classmate, unlike this one. In fact, she hadn’t even made it to middle school. She had dropped out when she was barely out of elementary school, the sight of her parents’ deaths fresh in her mind and vengeful resentment towards innocent Mary festering in her heart.

As far as she knew, this Ayano doesn’t know Mary. Has never even met the girl. Instead, she is friends with schoolmates Haruka and Takane, the two whom she herself had never gotten the chance to know in her own life. And from what she has gathered, her younger siblings still love this Ayano.

That…is something that she cannot really say for herself. Not since the accident.

This Ayano, that Shintaro encounters in each timeloop, is completely different from her. They might as well be entirely different people.

To be honest, she resents her. Not only is she throwing a wrench in her goal, to end this eternal cycle, but as far as she could tell, this Ayano has everything. Her family loves her. Her friends love her. She gets to go to school and be normal. She gets to spend time with her beloved (in her own timeline, Ayano barely got more than a day).

So…why? Why does this Ayano give it all up?

Her questions are answered in one timeline, when Kano, her foster brother, gives a rough explanation that leaves her furious and hungering for more answers that no one would give.

The fact that this version of Ayano is staking her very existence on the chance to stop the Snake of Clearing Eyes from achieving his goal is, perhaps, far too expected to be surprising (it is exactly what she herself is doing, is it not?). But to think that she is purposefully driving him into a corner, unwittingly giving him the excuse to force Mary to restart each timeloop and keep them trapped in this cycle? There is irony, and then there is cruelty. Never did Ayano think for one moment that her biggest obstacle would be herself.

It is surely her punishment, Ayano thinks to herself, for everything that she had done in her own life. As if giving up her humanity could ever make up for her sins, the grief she had caused.

As much as Ayano hates the Snake of Clearing Eyes, sometimes she supposes that maybe, she hates herself all the more.

—

She's died again. Ayano watches through Shintaro's tear-filled eyes. She herself feels nothing. This timeloop is likely doomed to fail, anyway. She knows the chain of events like the back of her hand now.

Before the week is out, Shintaro will officially be pulled out of school. By this evening, he'll already be shutting himself in his room.

Within the year, he'll meet Ene, the supposed artificial intelligence who is far more than meets the eye.

Whether he dies soon after that, or later down the line, the chain of events has already begun. This chain of time, that is like a noose constricting her neck. It doesn’t matter how much she screams and fights against it.

This is the fate she has sentenced herself to. This is her punishment for having the audacity to believe that they could make things right, that they could end this eternal cycle of tragedy. It is her hubris, hers and her counterpart’s, that led them to this damnation.

She, trapped in the mind of the one she loved but couldn’t reach, and her, condemned to an infinite world of loneliness in the Heat Haze realm. The two of them burying their feelings and humanity for the sake of a cause that would never come to fruition. Two sides of the same coin, both as foolish and reckless as the other.

She listens to Shintaro crying in the darkness of his room.

Shintaro…I definitely don’t deserve your tears, you know?

—

The clockwork whirs and clicks underneath them, a familiar metallic melody that she had grown used to. The musical rhythm of time itself, playing for them in this space that is only theirs. Not a space for comfort or heartfelt emotions. Those aren’t things she is allowed to have. Emotions are something to be stifled and choked.

No, this is a space for cold facts and uncomfortable truths. Where reality would come crashing down on him as he learns the horrifying truth, and she’d play the part of the callous snake that only appears to resemble the girl he loves.

(In fairness, he isn’t wrong, when he accuses her of being a fake. The Ayano he knows would never look at him with a frigid smile or such empty eyes. His Ayano is bright and full of life, her smile echoing memories of summer days. She, on the other hand, had long forgotten how to curl her lips in such a gentle expression or believe in things like heroism or friendship. It is for that same reason that she never wears that silly scarf. The red scarf is the symbol of a hero, something she could never be. Sometimes, she wonders when she had forgotten the ideals that she had once sworn by. Maybe she is nothing but the snake he sees in her).

Shintaro stands in front of her. His eyes are wide, watching her. His fingers tremble as he clutches at the hem of his jacket. He seems terrified beyond belief, now that he knows the truth of this tragedy that they are bound to.

Well, it isn’t as if she hadn’t expected this reaction from him. Anyone would be overwhelmed by centuries worth of memories. And it wasn’t like she was much better, being the keeper of those recollections.

She regards him with a curious tilt of the head as she looms over him. She never quite got used to the serpentine form that she takes when speaking to him like this, even if it has been centuries since she had been a real human being.

In the distance, she hears the faint chiming of bells. Their time is almost up.

Ayano takes a deep breath. This is the part you must play. Now, do it well.

She pushes herself to sound urgent. Pretend she has any semblance of hope. At the very least, she should give him some incentive to fight. If not for herself, then for their friends, those kids who don’t deserve to be a part of this tragic tale. She owes them that much, at least, she thinks.

“A new timeloop approaches,” she tells him. “Now that you remember the secrets of this never-ending tragedy, what will you do?”

It isn’t any use asking him, to be honest. She knows him too well. Has been with him far too long not to. This is where he gives up, the knowledge overwhelming him with despair. This would be another failure. Another regret to drown in.

She braces herself for the crushing sense of defeat to overwhelm them both.

But instead he stares at her, determination in his crimson eyes. They seem to burn, blazing with something that she hasn’t seen from him in a long time. Her breath catches in her throat.

“I was given this power for a reason. This time, that Clearing Eyes bastard will be the one to pay. I’ll make sure that this never-ending summer finishes for good.”

As if in response to his words, the bells toll around them, singing their songs of promise. Light fills the room. It’s blinding, like the dawn of a new morning. Relief bubbles up in her chest. The crushing weight in her lungs lifts.

For the first time in forever, Ayano breathes. And she smiles.

#kagerou project #kagepro #mekakucity actors #ayano tateyama #shintaro kisaragi #ayaki #shinaya #fanfiction #kagerou day #yakitsukeru #my writings #fanfic #writers on tumblr #havent posted a fanfic on tumblr in forever

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medea10 · 4 years

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My Review of Magical Girl Site

How did I get into this anime? I…huh…Good question! I don’t recall. Probably some other anime reviewers mentioned it and I put it on the Amazon/Netflix list hoping I won’t have to watch it any time soon. Two years later and here we are!

Aya Asagiri’s life is a living hell. She is constantly bullied at school and no one does a thing to stop it. Her teachers don’t care about her well-being. Her father barely notices she exists. And to top it off, her brother beats the crap out of her just for him to relieve stress! Is it any wonder that she wants to commit suicide? One night, her computer mysteriously turns on to a website, promoting Aya to become a magical girl. She brushed it off and thought nothing of it…

That is until the next morning when she finds a note and a gun in her shoe locker. After being tortured by her bullies and almost raped, she finds herself at the end of her ropes and pulls out the mysterious gun. When she pulled the trigger, her bullies disappeared. Turns out, the targets are transported to another place. In the case of some of her bullies, they were transported to in front of a moving train.

Karma, bitches!

It’s unknown why Aya was specifically chosen to become a magical girl, but fellow magical girl Yatsumura feels she could use Aya’s magic to combat a looming threat to other magical girls. But they must not overuse their magic, otherwise they will die.

BETWEEN THE SUB AND THE DUB: As of this moment, this anime seems to be in the capable hands of Amazon Prime. And we all know how well they treat animes, right?! Hahaha! Funny! Anyways, don’t expect a dub! The cast seems to be comprised of many female seiyuus I’m not particularly familiar with. I mean with the exception of Aina Suzuki, I hear her sounds every day thanks to the Love Live game apps! Add to that the creepy, raspy voice of Frieza playing the site administrator! One voice actor however I heard the second he let out a creepy, hygena-like laugh, I knew exactly who this crazy bastard was! Nobuhiko Okamoto plays a great psychopath. Here’s what you might recognize these folks from.

*Aya is played by Yuuko Oono

*Yatsumura is played by Himika Akaneya

*Sarina is played by Haruka Yamazaki (known for Ruka on Hayate the Combat Butler, Mero on Monster Musume, Aika on High School DxD, and Natsumi on Danganronpa 3)

*Nijimi is played by Yuu Serizawa (known for Shera on How Not to Summon a Demon Lord)

*Shioi is played by Aina Suzuki (known for Mari on Love Live Sunshine)

AUTOMATICLY THROWN ON DISLIKED LIST: Okay children, who automatically ends up on my hate list for life?

Fuckers who commit rape and fuckers who kill animals for fun!

Damn right! Give this anime some credit for not showing Aya’s bullies throwing a cat in front of a moving train. If this were 10 years ago, they probably would have animated it and I would have been puking afterward. I’m not sure which of Aya’s bullies threw a cat in front of a moving train, but for the time being, I’m throwing them all on the list.

And while I’m here, Sarina! She was like the ring-leader in the bullying of Aya. I’m almost certain she’s the bitch that killed the stray cat but I have no proof of that. With my history with horrible people like that, I have no sympathy for bullies in the slightest and feel she got what was coming to her. Bitch, you got that big, ugly scar on your neck for a reason. You got what was coming!

DEFINITELY BELONGS IN DISLIKE HISTORY: Now that I got the usual gripe off my chest, gotta add Aya’s onii-chan, Kaname! Sweet merciful crap, do I love hearing Nobuhiko Okamoto play a psychopath, but this is going way too far. And Kaname is just irredeemable! He has this complex that makes him think he’s on God-tier and everyone else is beneth him. Now I do have to hate Kaname and Aya’s father for placing this kind of pressure on Kaname and beating the shit out of him if he gets bad grades. But good fuck, this guy just pushes past the line of no return when he tries to manipulate little girls, steal their power, and lose control. And this wasn’t like he had no control over his own body and wants to stop this from happening! Kaname meant every thing he did to his sister and her friends. OH…and that one guy he forced to off himself! I just can’t even with this guy!

SHIPPING: I know a lot of people ship the hell out of Aya and Yatsumura and yeah, I can see that and I would ship them too. But for reals, I just want these two girls to live a life of peace together for as long as they’re around. For fuck’s sake, did you see the shit they put up with in their lives? Aya was bullied relentlessly at home and school. Yatsumura watched her whole family be slaughtered by a creep. These girls deserve some sort of peace! I know this is the shipping category, but I felt the need to say this.

STICKS: Okay anime, what are you doing? Aya uses a magical gun! Sarina uses a magical yo-yo! Nijimi uses magical panties (insert immature laugh here)! Yatsumura uses a magical remote! How hard is it to have them say that! And I probably shouldn’t put blame on the anime and holler at the manga! But calling magical items “Sticks”, that feels…I don’t want to say stupid, but I can’t think of any other word to go along with that. I just feel like the manga was on some deadline and they were frantically finishing what to call their magical items and just went “FUCK IT, IT’S STICKS”.

COULD HAVE FOOLED ME: In the “Could have fooled me” category we have a boy who identifies as a girl magical girl! Man, 2018 definitely was the progressive AF year! I mean, we had Lily from Zombieland Saga, we had the girls who transformed into magical buff men in Magical Girl Ore, and now THIS! So we have Kiyo! An openly transgendered magical girl that’s not a token joke! Okay, well done guys! Pearl points all around!

ENDING: Early in the series, we learned about a moment called “The Tempest”. A catastrophic even set to take place once enough negative energy is caught. There are a lot of Magical Girl Site administrators that take advantage of “POOR UNFORTUNATE SOULS”. They pick the most unfortunate girls as pawns in their game. And once “The Tempest” hits, everyone will die and the world will start over anew. Aya and Yatsumura end up meeting new magical girl allies and even a few that were coersed by different administrators. Not to mention one of Aya’s bullies is a magical girl too with a score to settle! What could be worse?

How about we add Aya’s disgusting brother to this mix?! As I’ve mentioned before, Aya’s brother Kaname would use Aya as a personal punching bag in order to get rid of stress. When Aya became a magical girl, she would spend more time with Yatsumura or the other girls, leaving Kaname to go without slugging his sister. So fuckface over here manipulates another magical girl, Nijimi to do what he says. This leads to him stealing Nijimi’s underwear and gaining her magical power of mind control. I never thought I would have to say a sentence like that, but here we are.

Kaname went out of control with this power as he managed to injure all of the girls and give a fatal blow to Nijimi. But another possible enemy dropped a bomb on us when they kidnapped Kaname. THEN, these girls are targeted at Nijimi’s funeral and they almost died. Add another plot-twist, a police officer that’s been seen from time to time in a lot of the tragedies in the show is in cahoots with one of the magical girl site administrators. This keeps getting fuckier by the minute! Well, the girls felt it was time to take action and try to take out the administrators that screwed them with this doomed fate. But once they took out one of the administrators, they came across an ugly truth.

Sight administrators are magical girls who died previously!

Yeah, not that big of a shock! Madoka Magica gave us magical girls who end up so corrupt that they become witches they’re supposed to fight. While some of the administrators ended up falling to these girls, Nana (the creepy one we’ve been watching since ep 1) is the hardest one to take out. She ends up killing Yatsumura (because she used up too much of her power), but then manipulates her to become an administrator.

Once she manipulated Yatsumura, she ends up going after Aya. And after a lot of back-and-forth between the two girls, Yatsumura was able to snap out of Nana’s control and they managed to take out Nana. And we end the series with a brighter future for Aya and Yatsumura as their lives become a little less unfortunate.

Yeah, few issues here!

1.) There are still a butt-load of site administrators. Isn’t there still a “Tempest” going to happen? 2.) Aya and Yatsumura’s lives aren’t in danger anymore after using fuck-tons of their power? WTF?! 3.) What was the point of Aya shooting herself to get Yatsumura back? I am not following you. Is this some sort of Insception shit?! 4.) That detective! Misumi was his name? Why was he just casually talking to Nana a few episodes back? 5.) Why don’t we see him until the final few moments in the finale? 6.) WHY DID HE RAPE KANAME?! 7.) WHY WAS THIS SCENE A THING? 8.) I don’t want to say Kaname deserved it, buuuuuut… Uuuggghhh…Mumble, mumble. I can’t finish that thought. 9.) These site administrators are probably pissed and are going to want revenge on these magical girls. What’s going on here?

…Let me guess, I need to read the manga to get all my questions answered…

FUCKING FIGURES!

Seriously...what Misumi did. That scene is forever etched in my brain forever. Next to that scene of Kaname wiggling his junk in front of a guy.

This anime was pretty bad. No wait...

This anime was way too edgy for me! Episode 1 was just absolute torture porn involving Aya. The first episode managed to combine the bully scene in Vivid Strike, the puppy killing scene in Elfen Lied, and every bullying episode of Hell Girl all into one single episode. As for the rest of this series, they go above and beyond to grab some of the worst aspects of other animes and implement them here. Aya’s older brother almost has a God-complex that rivals that of Light Yagami of Death Note. Nijimi has a devoted fan that’s almost crossing over from the movie Perfect Blue. Body mutilation scenes on levels not seen since Higurashi! And fill this world up with the worst kinds of humans imaginable like in Elfen Lied! This was just too much hatred! Too much!

Add to that, there’s absolutely no resolution to this story. Yes, Aya and Yatsumura are alive and together. But guys, there are still some other-worldly strong site administrators looming! Tempest is still happening. KANAME IS STILL FUCKING ALIVE…literally and figuratively speaking! And with how much this anime has been panned by anime fans across the board, I doubt if this anime will ever receive a sequel. Guys, if you want a really good 12-episode anime about magical girls with an edge, just watch Madoka Magica. But if you’re a curious idiot like me, whatever, you do you!

As this anime is an Amazon Prime exclusive, I’m afraid that’s the only legal outlet for this.

Now that this is over, my next Amazon/Netflix/Crunchyroll anime is…

Grand Blue!

Oh, it’s set in a cute ocean town. Am I going to enjoy some cute absurdity like I did with Tsuritama?

Sort of!

OH GOOD FUCK, WHAT FRAT HOUSE WAS THIS BIRTHED FROM?!

#anime review #magical girl site #mahou shoujo site #aya asagiri #tsuyuno yatsumura #kaname asagiri #sarina shizukume

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entamewitchlulu · 5 years

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On Reo and Mabu: Potential Motivations

I HAVE MANY THOUGHTS ABOUT THE LAST SARAZANMAI EPISODE!!!! But specifically I want to talk about Reo and Mabu. We’ve barely gotten anything out of them in the anime canon so far, and yet, there is SO MUCH to analyze, and seeing as they are my Faves from this show, I need to talk.

Obviously! This whole post will contain Sarazanmai spoilers. Please blacklist “sarazanmai spoilers” if you would not wish to see these posts in the future!

So what do we know about Reo and Mabu, the two mysterious policemen in the Asakusa Police Box? Not much.

We know that they’re police officers stationed in a box together. We know that they appear to be responsible for a string of murders targeting, well, sexual perverts, and then turning them into kappa zombies. We also know that they do a sick ass dance every episode, and that they appear to be associated with “otters.” -- as well as the fact that they appear to have some kind of boss demanding “desire energy.”

we also know that all of the official art, AND the manga spinoff, ships the HELL out of them, which i would argue is very important but we’ll see

But their motivations? That’s a mystery. Is it just a job for them? I would hazard a guess that it is not.

By the end of this post, I will have presented my evidence that Mabu is in some form of danger, whether illness, organ failure, some other type of dying, or something else entirely, and that Reo is trying to sacrifice everything to save him.

First: let’s look at the OP. There’s some really, really great shots, and from my experience with Ikuhara’s work, every OP is a Huge Spoiler once you know what you’re looking for.

There’s a bit with our main trio, displayed with the person who, later, turns out to be their “most important person.” Kauzki is displayed with Haruka, Enta with Kazuki, and Toi with Chikai. This makes sense -- what is more surprising is when our antagonists show up in the exact same pose...

What we’ve learned about our main trio so far is that they have the desire to connect with their “most important person” -- to the point where they are sacrificing their own lives for that other person. Kazuki is ruining himself by pretending to be Sara in order to keep up the illusion of connection to his younger brother, Enta is so lost in his gay crush that his hallucinations get him into trouble and he wants to give everything he has to Kazuki, and Toi is literally waterboarding people and growing weed to be accepted as tough enough for his older brother so that they can stay together.

And we see Reo here in the exact same pose as the trio, with Mabu centered as his “most important person.” This pretty obviously indicates that Reo is probably sacrificing a lot, or at least something, for Mabu’s sake, in the same way the trio is each sacrificing something for someone else.

Let’s roll back for a moment and think to their most iconic sequence: the Desire Extraction Dance.

Specifically, this:

What is in that heart?? Clearly, something non-organic. I initially misremembered it as clockwork gears, though it appears to be a little more advanced than that. Either way, there is something up with that heart. And then Reo PULLS IT OUT????

it’s obviously their most iconic scene, but I don’t think it’s just for aesthetic. Because now we’re moving onto the meat of this discussion: the post credits scene of episode 5.

This is where we get some of the clearest indication of what’s going on. Pleased with their success from their latest zombie, this exchange occurs:

Lifeline? Maintenance? That sounds a lot like a heart that has mechanical apparatus.

Before this, Mabu also remarks on the fact that they are now “allowed” to leave their post since this kappa zombie succeeded, implying that....they have to do maintenance on the heart using the kappazombie somehow.

And as Mabu walks out, Reo quips:

Chasing pleasure. Chasing desire. The kappa zombies are literally desire personified, dragged out of a person so violently that it kills them. My conclusion from this? Mabu is going out to where they’ve put the kappazombie, where they’ve put desire personified, and is going to use that energy for “maintenance.” Especially because Reo here is joking that “maybe you just like it, cause it feels good. Right?”

To which Mabu says...

Mabu isn’t going out to collect the desire energy because he wants it, or because he enjoys the feeling of desire. At first glance this seems to be simply because he’s the straight-laced one, the one who’s all about the job, all about the duty. Personal feelings have no place in this job -- he doesn’t want the desires for himself, he’s just doing it because it’s part of the job.

But that doesn’t necessarily fit with Reo’s outburst after this comment.

For someone who’s been portrayed as the laid-back, smug character up until now, this reaction is...surprising. He looks more than just upset, he actually looks hurt. Now why would Reo respond like that?

Add this outburst to the OP’s implication that Mabu is Reo’s most important person, and the answer to that question is simple: Reo is in love with Mabu, or at the very least, is working for his sake. And Mabu doesn’t...or perhaps is incapable of understanding.

Mabu has a mechanical heart, one that requires maintenance through the process of stealing desires from others. This, to me, implies that Mabu is incapable of producing his own desires. His heart is damaged. It needs other people’s desires to function. He’s not just straight-laced, he’s physically incapable of desiring.

He’s physically incapable of connecting.

And this is Reo’s problem. He cares about Mabu to a devastating degree, the way that Kazuki cares for Haruka, Toi cares for Chikai, and Enta cares for Kazuki. But Mabu is incapable of recognizing this, and even if he could, incapable of reciprocating in any way. He has no idea what Reo is sacrificing for him.

And what is Reo sacrificing for him? I don’t know yet. I don’t have enough information. I personally get the vibe of some kind of “deal with the devil” somewhere in here, some reason for why Mabu has a damaged heart that is incapable of feeling any kind of desire, and some reason why Reo is working so hard.

But the details I have no idea yet. I’m suspecting we may learn more next episode...and perhaps I’m completely off base here!!

But if the promotional material is any guess...I’d say I’m pretty close. At the very least, Reo is in love with Mabu -- and somewhere in there, in that damaged heart that can’t feel love or friendship or connection of any kind, Mabu loves Reo back.

#reomabu #reo and mabu #reo niiboshi #mabu akutsu #sarazanmai #sarazamai spoilers #homura metas #lulu talks #long post

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thedevillord-writes · 5 years

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Pandora - Memories

"I believe that without memories there is no life, and that our memories should be of happy times"

-Lee Radziwill

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For the last few days, she had not returned home.

Ever since she handed in her resignation letter, Eisuke had been waiting outside her apartment but she never came home. Each night, he would hold his phone in his hand with her number already dialed but he could never bring himself to press the call button. There were many moments in the last eight years when Haruka definitely had enough of his shenanigans and the insults of jealous women, but never once in any of those moments did she ever consider resigning. Instead, she puffed out her chest and became more determined to prove herself. How helpless must she be for her to finally hand in that letter?

Without Haruka by his side, Eisuke was really feeling the distance between them. They lived in parallel worlds; if Haruka never applied for the job, they would never meet. He could not imagine what life would have been without her. Would he have went forward with his plans for the Tres Spades? Probably, but it would not be the same hotel as it was today. It would have been a lot harder for him to push through all his proposals without Haruka staying up late at night doing all the researching and paperwork. He would never become the man he was today without her.

But was it the same for her? Would she have lived a better life without him?

"Hand in the letter to HR."

"Are you sure, Mr. Ichinomiya?"

"Do as I say, Yumi."

The Ichinomiya Group building was in the heart of Tokyo, standing tall where residents of the city could see the sign anywhere and everywhere around the city. Haruka used to think it was the most formidable building, a skyscraper only losing out to the Tokyo Tower. Never in a million years did she think she would ever get the chance to step into the building, let alone work there.

For the first three years of her career as a secretary, this was where she spent her days and many nights. Rushing in through the main entrance, frantically searching for her employee's ID that was always somehow at the bottom of her purse, and always missing the elevator by a second. That was her life for three years. And although it was tough, a girl fresh out of high school with no experience, but she missed it. It was a simpler time back then. She missed that simpleness, where the only worries she had were making the right cup of coffee for Eisuke and typing up documents without errors.

Which was why she found herself standing outside the building after office hours.

It had been five years since she last stepped foot in the building. Eisuke moved his office to the hotel as soon as renovations were completed, and Haruka would meet with Akira outside, usually at a restaurant. For some reason, her evening walk after an early dinner brought her here: the place where it all began. She walked into the building, longing for that feeling of simpleness when she was stopped by the security guard.

"I'm sorry, miss, I'm afraid it's after ho- Miss Matsuoka?"

"Nori-san."

"Oh wow...I haven't seen you in years. You still look the same though, still as beautiful. Are you here to see Mr. Ichinomiya? Ichinomiya Akira, I mean. You work for the other Mr. Ichinomiya. Would be weird if you're here to see him."

Nori started as a security guard for Ichinomiya Group the same day Haruka started as Eisuke's secretary. They never were never close, not friends even, though Haruka would consider him as an acquaintance. Eisuke did not like the man; he was good at his job but he was too chatty for her boss. Every morning, he would greet Eisuke with a non-stop list of questions. Did you have a good sleep, sir? Have you eaten breakfast, sir? Busy day ahead of you, sir? Haruka, on the other hand, thought it was rather heartwarming to be greeted so cheerfully every morning. Five years went by and he did not change a bit. It was a good thing, however, as she was hit with that nostalgic feeling.

Although happy to see a familiar face, Haruka did not stay to chat. She was let through the security gates and she got onto an elevator, pressing for a floor. Despite Contrary to what Nori thought, she was not here to see Akira. Instead, she headed up to the tenth floor where Eisuke's office used to be.

The office itself did not change, but the layout did. As she navigated through the room, she could see Eisuke's old room in the far corner. The nameplate on the door belonged to someone else now but she could still remember the one bearing his name on it. Eisuke hated seeing that nameplate, and several times he tried to throw it out. It was a constant reminder that he carried the Ichinomiya name, and the source of the rumours floating around suggesting that he did not earn the position but rather, given it because he was Akira's son.

Sitting at the desk outside the room, Haruka could not help the smile on her face. She could still feel the excitement and nervousness of her first day. She bought a small potted plant, wanting to experience that cliché though she killed the plant within two weeks from over watering. She could remember cutting off Eisuke's calls because she was still figuring out which buttons to press. There were times where Eisuke resorted to throwing items at the small section of glass between the door and wall to get her attention instead. This was someone else's desk now, decorated with photo frames of presumably their loved ones and plants that were thriving. Where there used to be a monitor and CPU, it was replaced with a laptop.

"Everything's changed, huh?" Akira's sudden voice startled her and Haruka got onto her feet though the man beckoned for her to sit. He pulled a chair from a nearby desk and sat down next to her. "The guard told me you were here."

"I'm sorry, I didn't mean to intrude."

"You're an employee, you're always welcomed here."

"Akira-sama, I'm-"

"I know. HR told me."

In a company as big as the Ichinomiya Group, there was no such thing as a secret. If someone was up for a promotion, the entire company would know by lunch. If someone was getting fired, by morning coffee. And despite not working in the building, employees still kept taps on others. It was only a matter of time before Akira found out about her resignation.

"So why are you here?" Akira asked. "It's definitely not because you wanted to see me."

"I guess I missed this place. Did you know Mr. Ichinomiya was the one who taught me English?"

"I thought he sent you for lessons?"

"He wanted to, but the teachers were not qualified enough. And it was too inefficient to send me to England so he took it upon himself to teach me. Every night after dinner, we would sit here and have our lesson. He'd flick my forehead every time I got the pronunciation, the grammar, or the spelling wrong."

Haruka always thought her English was good. Not good enough to speak fluently as if she was a native English speaker, but good enough to understand basic conversations and read books with a dictionary at hand. Eisuke proved her to be wrong. He would return document after document with red circles over every single spelling and grammar mistake. He would take over phone calls in two seconds if she even hesitated for a split second. She felt especially humiliated when she was instructed not to speak at events.

But those English lessons with Eisuke were one of the memories that she became fond of.

"Everything's changed since then."

"You know, when I took Eisuke in, he changed a lot. Even at that young age." Akira leaned back on the chair, holding his hands together as he looked to Haruka. "He was, believe it or a not, a very cheerful and bright child. Full of energy. But I suppose when tragedy hits, anyone would undergo a personality change. He became reclusive and it worsened over time. He can socialise perfectly well, but only if the situation calls for it. If it were up to him, I'm sure Eisuke would have preferred to be by himself. Then you came along.

"I know the kind of pressure he had to go through, carrying my name. No one in the company thought he belonged, no matter how hard he worked to earn his position. And I'm not being biased because he's my son, but Eisuke works harder than anyone else. He hated coming into the office so he would come in as little as possible. I think he was looking for a new office elsewhere if I remember correctly. But I think about a month into employing you, he was suddenly coming in every day. He'd always used to say, 'I have to go in, or she's going to mess up my proposal'.

"You were the only thing he talked about. Those English lessons? I've seen him staying up late in his room drawing up lesson plans. This is why I like you so much, Haruka. Not because you're hardworking and possibly the best secretary around, that's just a bonus. No, I like you because changed Eisuke for the better. You brought him out of that dark place. I think he fell in love with you back then but he just didn't know it. I'm guessing that he's starting to realise now, as you are."

This was all new to Haruka.

She could tell that Eisuke had changed over the eight years, but she always assumed it was because she became capable enough for him not to worry about her. She became someone he could rely on and therefore, he did not need to be constantly on her back. Never in a million years would she think that she was the one who pulled him out of a bad place.

"It's not my place to tell you what to do but I know you're only resigning because you think you're not good enough to be with Eisuke and it's finally taking a toll on you. My advice to you is, love is between the two people sharing that same feeling. Don't let anyone else affect your decision. If I don't mind, and if Eisuke doesn't mind, what's stopping you?"

With a gentle pat on her shoulder, Akira stood up and pushed the chair back where he took it, leaving Haruka alone in the office. Akira was right; if he did not mind, and if Eisuke did not mind, why was she so hesitant? Love between two people should only involve those two people and nobody else. After sitting in the dark for twenty minutes, she still could not make up her mind despite Akira's advice. There were too many other variables stopping her from taking that step forward, variables that could not be explained away nor simply stored away and ignored. She left the building, walking without a destination in mind.

What would her mother think of all this?

The one thought that kept coming back to Haruka was her mother. Of all people, her mother would never have approved this relationship. Getting involved with your boss was a problem in itself, not to mention the pain of dating outside your social circle. She saw first hand, growing up, how a relationship between two people from two different worlds was bound for failure. And when it did, it only hurt her mother: the one with no power, and everything to lose.

Absentmindedly, she turned down another street and stopped when a door on the right opened, blocking her route. As she looked up, she was met with eyes that she knew too well. It had only been a few days but it felt as if they had not seen each other for decades. There was a strong urge in her to run up to him and be held in his arms though she stopped herself. Her letter was handed into HR, she no longer had ties to him.

~.~

Returning to the hotel was another reminder that Haruka was no longer in his life, which was why Eisuke stayed away for the day. Eight years ago, when Haruka first started as his secretary, there were many times when he regretted his decision and looked for an opportunity to fire her. It would have been hard for Eisuke then to believe there would come a day when it was painful for him to hand in a resignation letter for an employee, yet here he was.

With nowhere else to go, Eisuke found himself parked right outside a café. It was a place he frequented, though anyone who knew him at all would never have thought in a million years that he would come to a place like this. The adorably themed café that primarily targeted teenagers and young women was certainly not a place where Eisuke would choose to have a thought-clearing coffee either, though he had his reasons for coming so often. He got out of his car and headed for the door although he seemed to be in someone's way as he opened the door.

The last person he imagined seeing here was also the one person he expected to run into eventually here. After all, Haruka was the reason why he came to this café in the first place.

Neither of them spoke a word to each other but they went into the café together after one knowing look. They stood in line together though anyone could tell that there was an awkward cloud hanging over them. Haruka always knew when to speak and when to keep quiet, and Eisuke loved that about her. She could read his mind as if she was his mind. He hated the silence now, however.

"One Earl Grey, and one coffee. Could I please have the milk separately?" After ordering, they went to find an empty table and sat together in the same awkward silence as before. A few moments later, the waitress came with their order and two extra slices of cakes. "Sorry, we didn't order these."

"They are complimentary."

"Oh um...thank you."

Out of habit, Haruka picked up the fork and picked the strawberries off one cake, transferring them to the other and pushed it toward Eisuke. She was pleasantly surprised when she found out that he had a sweet tooth. It did not quite match his image, nor did Eisuke like to flaunt that fact. He would always eye the strawberries on her cake, which was why she always gave them to him.

"Why don't you like strawberries?" Eisuke asked.

"Pardon?"

"The strawberries. You never eat them, you always give them to me."

"I like strawberries," Haruka said. "But you like them too. And you always look at me like I've stolen your entire inheritance, so I give them to you."

Her answer was both expected and unexpected. There was so little that Eisuke really know about but on the other hand, Haruka knew almost everything about him. The fact that he liked strawberries was not broadcast to the public, he did not feel like it was necessary information for anyone. He was not sure if even Soryu knew. But Haruka did. As she did with everything else about him. She ordered the coffee with the milk separately because only she knew how to make coffee that he liked. She would pick the peas off one by one whenever the kitchen messed up his order.

"Do you remember this place?" Haruka asked, taking a bite of the cake.

"You asked to come here as a reward when the papers for Tres Spades were approved."

"You remember?"

"How could I not? A normal person would have asked for a raise. Or even a present. But you asked to have a slice of cake at this new café that you saw on the way to work. And it's the most ridiculous place I've ever been to."

When the papers were approved, the first person Eisuke thought of was Haruka. She stayed up late with him, night after night, writing the perfect proposal. He wanted to reward her but did not want to buy something she might not like so he thought to ask her. That was how they ended up at the café. Since then, Eisuke would come here whenever he ran into some difficult situations, or had some thoughts that he could not think through. It was an odd place, and he definitely stuck out, but it always cleared his mind.

"I've never seen you drink coffee either."

"I'm allergic."

"Allergic to coffee?"

"The smell gives me a headache. And I get rashes if I drink it. I got hospitalised once but at least I know what mocha tastes like."

It was interesting, learning about Haruka. It never occurred to Eisuke before to just sit down, have a drink, and talk. In the short period of time from her going on break to her resigning, Eisuke learnt more about her than he did over the eight years they worked together. It was a slap in the face really, for him. He fell in love with her, not knowing a single thing about her and expected her to accept him.

Pushing his cake toward Haruka, Eisuke got up and picked up his suit jacket. It was a short conversation but it made Eisuke realise a lot. "Go home," he said. "And I mean go home, not back to wherever that Yosuke lives. You don't have to worry about me showing up there. Just...live the life you want."

A little shocked at Eisuke's statement, Haruka could only watch him leave. He did not touch the cake, leaving the strawberries behind. It was a small gesture but he was always full of those. When he found out she did not like hospitals, he invited the doctor to the hotel to do her annual check-ups. When she told him she hated peppers because of the taste, he made sure that every meal served to her did not have any peppers. Small gestures, but ones that she really appreciated.

"I'm so jealous, your boyfriend is amazing," the waitress smiled as she passed by the table.

"Excuse me?"

"He's our regular. Not like he comes everyday, but every so often. He always orders coffee with a slice of cake, and he always makes a face after drinking the coffee like it's the most disgusting thing," she continued. "But he never eats the cake. He orders it but never wants it. He told us to just keep track of the cakes he bought and showed us a picture of you. He said, if you ever show up, we should give you a slice of cake but not to let you know that it's from him."

#pdr ch15 #kissed by the baddest bidder #kbtbb #kings of paradise #kop #eisuke ichinomiya #yosuke sagara #voltage inc #this was originally intended to be a filler chapter #but i decided against it #so here we go #finally an update after a million years

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subliminalcherry-blog · 5 years

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Long Ass Enta Rant

The only thing more problematic than defending Enta’s behavior because he’s “14″ and “we all did dumb things as kids” (I sure as hell didn’t do the things Enta does toward my crush at 14 but I’m not going to get into that) is claiming that any hate/criticism directed at Enta is based on homophobia?? Or an adult not understanding how a child’s mind works when they’re in love?

And after seeing so many posts in the tags about it, I’m going to explain why that’s a garbage conclusion to come to.

Like, y’all do realize that Reo and Mabu are the fandom’s favorite characters, the most popular characters to come out of the show while it’s airing regardless of whether people read the Manga first or not, and they’re both undoubtedly, definitely, and indisputably gay? And they’re both ADULTS out here relentlessly murdering people but they’re still well liked.

Where are these homophobia claims coming from? They’re both baseless and stupid. A characters sexuality should NOT be a shield from criticism. Ever.

For people who shit on Reo and Mabu fans for still liking them but in the same breath, criticizing Enta, People can continue to like Reo and Mabu despite all the things they do because we can acknowledge that they’re the bad guys and they’re intended to be the shows main villains or at least so far that is what we are being lead to believe. No one tries to justify the things they do. No one is saying Reo is in the right for trying to kill multiple children and MAYBE succeeding the second time around. They’re villains. They don’t try to justify their actions or so far have not made themselves out to be victims. And most of all, we don’t see their fans jumping to their defense every time they do something inherently wrong. Most of us were just as shocked as anyone else that Reo’s crazy ass shot Enta. But moving on.

In the case of Enta, what’s worse than the things he unapologetically does is his fans acting like the things he does aren’t bad and use his age and sexuality to guilt people and deflect criticism from him as a character. First of all, gay people do not need to be coddled and treated like they can do no wrong. Real gay people are human beings who make mistakes and eventually own up to them. Enta has not and has only continued to make mistakes while learning nothing from them. I understand that Sarazanmai is short and fast paced, but that’s still no excuse in my opinion. Second of all, No one is vilifying Enta because he’s gay. That aspect of his character is largely irrelevant compared to the things he does. Enta is not being singled out because he’s the only openly gay character of the main trio. He’s being criticized because the things he does are inherently wrong and mostly without justification. And he’s not the only one being criticized.

Kazuki, Mabu and Reo have all come under fire for the things they do. Chikai maybe has faced backlash as well, especially for what he does in episode 8, but I haven’t went out of my way to look for it. The only one of the relevant cast, Sara aside, who hasn’t done a thing to warrant backlash is maybe Tooi. You can bring up the fact that he killed someone and his brother covered it up, but he was a child, even younger than Enta and he did it in self-defense - and was lead to believe that was something he must do to project his brother who shifted the blame onto himself. It is in my opinion that Chikai pretty much conditioned him into thinking this was an acceptable lifestyle and choice, but I’m not entirely confident that it was written with that intent so just take that for a grain of salt.

As per the Ikuhara character standard nowadays, Enta is a piece of shit. He makes himself out to be a victim and his fans treat him as such. He refuses to see the error of his ways even if he hurts the person he cares about the most and wants to connect to in the process. He’s not entirely unsympathetic and sometimes he may even be understandable, but he’s shown to take things to illogical extremes, as Ikuhara characters tend to do. He acts entitled to Kazuki, and only loves the idealized version that he once knew or ultimately made up in his head, refusing to accept that Kazuki doesn’t reciprocate his feelings. Enta is the type of character that everyone would hate if he was a straight male character doing these things to a disinterested female character. But suddenly because he’s gay it’s justifiable and endearing and anyone that doesn’t like him is a homophobe? That’s ridiculous. I don’t give a shit what a character or human beings sexuality is. A piece of shit is a piece of shit.

I’m not even going to lie. I wanted to like Enta at first. I was following Sarazanmai since it was first announced and when the character designs first came out, Right off the bat, I wasn’t a fan of his design or how aggressive he was toward the other characters in the trailers. For me, those were red flags. But I still tried to like him regardless. when he kissed Kazuki, I got excited until the implications of his actions fully set in for me. Kissing someone without their consent isn’t okay, especially if the person is asleep. That was already another red flag for me. And then they reveal that he just stepped up to the next level of creepy by making him sniff kazukis clothes and suck on his recorder for indirect kisses? He has delusions about him? And people tried to justify it because he’s 14 as if it wouldn’t be creepy if it happened to someone in real life or again, if a male anime character did it to a female anime character? Only scenario I could see this not receiving hate wildly in is if it was a comedy anime or something but then we’d still have a number of people labeling the character as a creep.

Enta’s love for Kazuki is unhealthy. It’s more than just being a dumb awkward gay 14 year old who has their first crush on someone. He’s just a character in a long line of Ikuhara character’s that don’t display their love for another person in way that is understandable or healthy. I don’t see how relatable this character could be on a surface level when you think of all the things he’s done. He’s not a borderline rapist like Ringo from Mawaru Penguindrum, which I’m grateful for because she may be one of the most unlikeable characters Ikuhara has ever written, but he’s basically Lulu 2.0 from Yuri Kuma Arashi except a guy. He even ““dies”” in the same way as her.

While Kazuki is no saint and getting some of the backlash he deserves, Enta is not entitled to Kazuki and part of the hate directed at Kazuki shouldn’t have anything to do with his feelings or the lack of them toward Enta or being too dim-witted to acknowledge them. Enta is not a victim just because his love is unrequited. He’s a flawed character, borderline unlikeable for some including myself and relatable for others but a flawed Ikuhara character nonetheless. The criticism he receives is not baseless. It’s not based on homophobia. He’s not being singled out because he’s an ““awkward gay 14 year old” as if a homophobe would sit through this show for 8 episodes anyway just to come to that conclusion. Episode 1 was a turn off for even people who aren’t homophobic anyway —

He’s criticized because he’s a flawed character that shows no remorse for his actions, acts entitled, acts like a victim in situations where he’s in the wrong, is a creep and is currently fighting Kazuki for the title of the most unlikeable, most unsympathetic character in the cast for me and no amount of ““self sacrifice” is going to change that for me until i see him change. I think next to Tooi, he’s better written than Kazuki, who imo has been bland and never stopped being bland. But that doesn’t necessarily make him a good character or ““well-written” either.

At the end of the day, it boils down to your opinions and perspectives. It just gets tiresome seeing people trying to write off criticism toward Enta as irrelevant just because he’s gay or because he’s “14″ as if this “14″ year old wasn’t written by a grown man with a history of writing problematic underage characters? Ringo didn’t initially get a slap on the wrist when she was shitty until she truly earned her sympathy card. None of the characters in Yuri Kuma did either except Lulu who ended up dying despite being the most likeable character in the cast.

The amount of people I see defending him makes me think this is a lot of you’s first Ikuhara anime. Most of us who have seen Ikuhara anime before would have expected a character like this due to his repetitive story-telling and character molds. Like I said before, Ikuhara has a history of writing problematic characters. Everyone in the main cast is in a way, even Tooi. Sara is squeaky clean for now, but she may end up being a morally grey character as well.

I just can’t take the opinions of people who make baseless claims like that seriously. Or people who try to justify Enta’s actions because of his age either. He’s a FICTIONAL CHARACTER. not a real 14 year old. I don’t get why people are so defensive over him either. I get that we can relate to characters sometimes, but the amount of projection I’m seeing is almost as unhealthy as his obsession with Kazuki.

Anyway, come for me if you want. Send hate or whatever. If you wanna discuss your perspective on Enta’s character, feel free to do that too.

If anything, y’all should be mad that all the most outwardly problematic characters in the show are gay and barely have any justification for their actions. I mean Kazuki tried to kidnap someone and impersonated Sara because he wanted to form a connection with his brother, but he not only failed at getting Sara kidnapped, he also learns from his actions and tries to form a genuine connection with Haruka on his own. Being dismissive of Enta’s romantic feelings for him shouldn’t be an subject of criticism and shouldn’t warrant a justification. If you aren’t interested, you aren’t interested. Onto Tooi - We don’t know what Tooi’s sexuality is, but his justification for killing a guy was self defense and he was most likely conditioned into believing that the lifestyle he lives is acceptable by his brother.

What’s Enta’s excuse other than that he was jealous? Reo and Mabu didn’t didnt have a genuine excuse to kill all of those people, including trying to kill Harukawa and then shooting Enta. I understand that they’re threatened with death, but They could have just threatened Kazuki and Enta into giving up the dishes of hope since they had a gun. Just saying.

Anyway rant over. If you lasted this long, what are you doing with your life. And what am I since I sat down and wrote all this shit.

#sarazanmai spoilers #sarazanmai #i actually considered not posting this but you know what #Someone had to say it and I got enough pent up annoyance at enta as a character just to do it.#Christ i wrote a whole damn book lmao I don’teven wanna reread this for spelling errors.

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murasaki-murasame · 5 years

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Thoughts on Sarazanmai Episode 8: “I Want To Connect, But We’ll Never Meet Again”

Hey Ikuhara, do you take constructive criticism on your posts? :) I JUST WANT TO TALK :)))

I’d seen vague stuff on twitter recently about how devastating this episode was gonna be, and honestly I think that actually under-sold how messed up and tragic this episode was, on so many levels. I was actually worried that I’d end up being a little disappointed in it after how strongly people were talking about it, but hahaha nope. I am officially dead now :)

Thoughts under the cut.

OK first of all I may as well point out that I, and also lots of other people, totally saw that starting scene coming. It’s a lot more obvious if you’re familiar with Ikuhara’s writing style and the sorta tropes he likes to use, but it felt pretty inevitable that Toi and Kazuki would have had a prior connection we didn’t know about before now.

I was a bit confused about the timeline of it at first, but by the end of the episode it became pretty clear that it must have happened shortly after Toi shot that gangster dude. I guess it also must have happened shortly after the whole incident with Haruka, since Kazuki talked about ‘not being connected to anyone’, but I vaguely remember Kazuki looking older in the flashbacks to that whole sequence of events than he did in this episode’s flashback.

Even though this all makes sense and just ties everything together, I’m curious about why Enta has been saying that he was the one to give Kazuki the micanga. I mean, I think the initial story was that Enta gave it to him, but I can’t actually remember now. I wouldn’t be surprised if there’s still a little more for us to find out about how Enta and Kazuki first met and became friends.

Over the last few days I’d been preparing myself for the possibility of Chikai becoming a kappa zombie and getting erased from existence, and on the one hand I guess I’m happy that didn’t happen, but on the other hand I feel like what happened instead was even more tragic.

I’d been waiting for the inevitable part where the main trio would come into direct conflict with Reo and Mabu, and oh boy did that sure go in the worst possible way. Reo’s out there looking like a horror movie villain, and now Enta’s dead? Maybe? The fact that it looks like the severity of the gunshot wounds is censored so much actually makes it hard to get a feel for how fatal it’s meant to be. When they shot the first gangster dude earlier in the episode, it was so clean and bloodless that I honestly thought it was more like a magical tranquilizer dart so they could drag him to their police box to use the desire extraction machine on him, but I guess we’re meant to think that it was a straight up regular fatal gunshot.

To address the whole elephant in the room, I’d be very surprised if Enta’s actually permanently dead, when we have three whole episodes left. I know Ikuhara likes killing off his characters, but I feel like that tends to happen much closer to the end of the show. And since we already have a whole wish-granting system in place, anything’s possible. And going by what Mabu said at the end, and how one of the ep9 preview images seems to be of Kazuki in a hospital, I have a feeling that Enta might still be alive, but on the brink of death.

I’ve been on the Enta Defense Train [tm] from day one, and I hope that this episode helped people understand that he really is a good boy who doesn’t deserve the shit he’s gotten. The whole bit with him saying at the end that even after everything that happened, he couldn’t make himself say that he hated Kazuki was high-key heartbreaking.

And on top of all that, I honestly wasn’t expecting Toi to actually end up leaving with his brother. Well, mostly because I expected Chikai to die in this episode, but still. I imagine Kazuki will find a way to get back into contact with him soon enough, but the fact that Toi had also left them sure puts Kazuki in an even more tragic spot.

I hope I’m not the only one who’s getting the feeling that Kazuki’s quickly developing a crush on Toi, with how fast they’ve been bonding and how severely he’s reacting to Toi’s departure. It’d at least throw a whole new wrench in things if it’s true.

In spite of how Reo and Mabu’s actions in this episode are pretty straight-up indefensible, especially if we’re meant to think that Reo actually just outright shot both Enta and the gang member dude, I still can’t help but like them. Reo in particular is being driven out of loneliness and desperation, and also tbh it’s kinda hard to take his scary moments too seriously when they’re so over the top, and when we also know what he’s like in his day to day life, lol. At the very least I’d much rather people criticize them than Enta, considering that the worst thing Enta’s done so far is be a petty and jealous 14-year old with a crush, whereas Reo and Mabu are literally serial killers at this point.

And on the note of them, it sounds like the anime might never get around to adapting the short chapter from the first light novel volume that goes over how the two of them first met, which would be kinda sad since, now that I’ve read it, it’s really good and helps contextualize why Reo feels so strongly about Mabu and is doing so much for his sake. I’d say that the material from the manga and the twitter account is actually more ‘plot important’ and necessary to truly understanding them as characters, but still.

Vaguely related to them, we also got another scene with Sara and Keppi in this episode, which seems to spell out more explicitly that they’re both on the side of the kappas and are working against the otters, to the point of Sara whipping out some anti-otter technology. I still have no goddamn idea what to make of her as a character at this point, especially since this episode really makes it seem like she doesn’t remember Reo and Mabu, even though we’ve already been told that the ReoMabu manga is, one way or another, canon to the anime.

I initially wasn’t sure if Keppi getting frozen was meant to have consequences or just be a silly thing, but I saw someone point out that if he stays that way for a while, then Kazuki won’t be able to transform into a kappa, which could be a problem.

I think I said in the last episode post that it looks like things are heading straight into the climax, and that seems to be the case now. A lot is probably going to hinge on who gets to use the plates to make a wish, and what they use it for. I’m curious to see if Reo and Mabu only have the four plates that Enta had stolen, or if they also got the fifth one that the trio would have gotten after the ball zombie fight. It’d probably make more sense if Rreo and Mabu only have four of them, so they can’t immediately make a wish with it.

The more the show goes on, the more things pop up that seem like really good and necessary places to use the wish on, so it’s getting harder to tell how I think that’ll all end up. At this point the situations going on with Toi and Enta seem a lot more severe and in need of outside help than Reo and Mabu’s situation.

Even with just three episodes left, I’m not entirely sure what to expect. Mostly I just hope it manages to stick the landing. I’m kinda worried that, at the very least, Reo and Mabu’s characters might end up being too reliant on material from outside of the anime to really flesh them out, but at this point I think the main trio and their development will be handled in a satisfying way.

I said before that I thought we’d be in for another whole round of secret reveals, but with how this episode went, and the possibility of Kazuki not being able to even turn into a kappa in the short term with Keppi being out of commission, I think the pattern is completely broken at this point and we might not get any more secret leaking sequences. At least not via the whole sarazanmai transformation thing.

If there’s any one specific thing I really want them to address before the anime ends, it’s the whole connection between Reo, Mabu, and Sara, since that hasn’t come up at all yet in the anime, and it seems really important. But we’ll see.

One way or another I think we’re in for a lot more tragedy before this ends, lol.

#murasaki rambles #sarazanmai #I want to get off Ikuhara's Wild Ride :(

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obscurelysevere · 5 years

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5: Introductions

Nerves that were uncharacteristic of her were flitting around in her stomach, as Usagi tugged at her and Mamoru's arms, pulling them toward Crown parlor. "Ooh, I can't wait to introduce you to my friends! Another senshi! This is so exciting!" the tiny blonde bubbled, as the sliding doors parted for the trio. "How many others are there?" Kat asked, betraying her own nerves. "Well, there's..." Usagi stopped to think, counting silently on her fingers. "Ten of us? If you include Chibimoon and myself." "Ten?!" She was not expecting that many. "Oh! But don't worry, not everybody is here all the time. Haruka and Michiru and Setsuna and Hotaru kind of like to... keep to themselves. And Chibimoon is in the future with Neo Queen Serenity and King Endymion," she continued to babble on. "Endymion? Neo Queen...?" Kat stopped walking, and looked up at her brother, who went by the same name in a previous life, with her, and Princess Serenity. Usagi stopped walking and looked back at the siblings. "Eh... uhm... yeah. So... Neo Queen Serenity and King Endymion are me and Mamo-chan in the future. And Chibiusa is their... our daughter." Usagi poked her two pointer fingers together a couple of times, sounding slightly embarrassed.

It was Kat's turn for her mouth to fall open slightly, at a complete loss for words. So Usagi continued. "Chibiusa - Chibimoon - comes and visits us here, in the past, sometimes. She also comes to see Hotaru - they're best friends, you see." Kat closed her eyes for a moment. She just spent the past few months trying to wrap her head around her past. But there was a future world she had to think about too? She couldn't help but smile, though. The idea that the prince and princess still existed in another time made her happy. "Well, I can't wait to meet her sometime." "I guess that would make her your niece!" Usagi exclaimed, excitedly, now that she knew she didn't freak Kat out. "So, then, if she's from the future... Does she already know about me?" The question tumbled from Kat's lips before she could swallow it. It didn't want to impose on their lives in any way, and that question almost felt too close to the line. Usagi and Mamoru exchanged an unsure glance. "Eh... She hasn't said anything about you, before," Usagi started, carefully. "Yeah, but, I only became aware of your existence after you did. So maybe, your... awakening will start to spark something in all of our memories?" Mamoru was quick to offer. "Yeah, yeah!" Usagi agreed just as quickly. She grabbed Kat's and Mamoru's hands, pulling them along again, as she walked backwards towards a booth full of four other girls and two... cats? "Usagi-chan!" A blonde with a red bow stood up, beaming. All the girls looked up at the sound of Usagi's announcement. They looked like they were going to greet her, but their voices stuck in their throats at the sight of the newcomer. The girl with the blue bob spoke up first. "Who's your new friend, Usagi?" Kat suddenly felt very under the microscope. All she had planned on doing was meeting her brother today. But she'd already met him, his fiancé - the moon princess - heard of their daughter, and she was meeting other senshi, that she had only had a very faint knowledge of just until an hour ago. Her face felt hot - was she blushing? "This is Roun Katrina! She's... well..." Usagi stopped again, looking up at Kat and Mamoru, as if asking them to finish explaining for her. Mamoru cleared his throat and put his free hand on Kat's shoulder. "This is my sister, from the Silver Millennium." "Whaaat!?" All four girls - and the cats - cried at once, in disbelief. "Your sister!?" the raven-haired girl repeated, the words almost sounding funny on her tongue. "Mamoru, honestly, how long have you been keeping this a secret from us?" she demanded. "He didn't know," Kat was quick to jump in. "I just... found him today. I only got my memories back a few months ago." "Right around the time Galaxia... killed me." Mamoru added. "Wait, what!?" Kat's head snapped up. "You died again?" Mamoru quickly put up his hands in defense. "Yeah... When you showed me your memories, I saw more than just our past, I saw your life up until... well, today, really." "Kat is a sailor senshi, just like us!" Usagi added, with much excitement. The girls began throwing a barrage of questions at Mamoru and Katrina. "Here, here, let me just show you," Kat offered. She glanced around, there weren't many people in the Crown parlor, so she felt fairly safe letting the other girls see her past. She wasn't aware that her past also included her transforming for the first time in the present and fighting the phages, which she assumed came from this Galaxia that her brother had mentioned. The girls each put a hand in the middle of the table, fingertips touching, and Kat hovered her hand over theirs. Her signature rosy-golden glow illuminated her fingertips and warmth flooded over the other girls' hands. They were all silent as the memories merged in their minds. Kat also sensed the two cats presences in the peripheral of her mind. They all opened their eyes as Kat pulled her hand back. They blinked slowly, and looked at her with new eyes. Not recognition, but acceptance. The warmth that squeezed at Kat's heart was new and unfamiliar. She'd never had so many people around her before. "Sailor Earth," the brunette said, wonder in her voice. They each began to introduce themselves - Minako, Sailor Venus, Makoto, Sailor Jupiter, Rei, Sailor Mars, Ami, Sailor Mercury, and even the two cats - Artemis and Luna. They all moved to make way for her to sit amongst them. Mamoru excused himself, kissing Usagi atop her head, saying something about really needing to study, and he was so, so sorry, but he promised Usagi and Kat that they could all get together for dinner that night. Kat wasn't in the least bit nervous about her brother leaving her behind with these girls she'd only just met. It felt like she'd always known them, Usagi especially. Conversation quickly bubbled up, about school and studies, and eating and sleeping and gaming (courtesy of Usagi, herself). It was clear the girls had a deep bond, one that went far beyond them just being sailor senshi. The girls asked where Kat lived, where she went to school, what she did for a living, etc. Kat tucked some hair behind her ear, looking down at the strawberry parfait sitting in front of her (one that Usagi had insisted that she try). "Well... I live in Hakone right now... but I've been looking at moving here and studying at Keio University. I want to continue studying biology, with an emphasis at animal husbandry and conservation. I'm currently a vet tech at one of the best vets in Hakone, but I want to be able to do much more." "So like, zoology?" Ami asked, smiling gently at her. "Yeah, exactly like zoology, actually. I would love to work at the Tokyo zoo, eventually. But that seems like such a long ways down the road. Especially after discovering who I really am. But it's gotten so quiet since you beat Galaxia, that I feel like I might be able to dedicate more of myself to my studies." Ami nodded sagely. "Being a sailor guardian can be a lot of work, itself. But I've been able to maintain my studies and honor roll, so it's not impossible." Usagi and Minako groaned and rolled their eyes a little bit. Kat laughed. "I take it you two aren't too fond of school?" Rei smorted. "Usagi avoids studying like the plague. And her grades show how vested she is in her 'studies'." "Why should I try to memorize something I'm going to forget immediately? And it's something that's not so important anyway, not like being Sailor Moon is!" Usagi's voice grew louder with determination. "Shhh!" The girls were quick to shush her, and she hung her head slightly. Kat laughed. "You're such good friends." "What about your friends, Kat-chan?" Usagi asked, innocently. Kat wasn't used to the affectionate nickname. It made her feel warm and welcomed. "Well... I don't really have friends outside of my coworkers back home, really," she admitted, quietly. "Don't worry, we'll be your friends, from now on!" Usagi cheered. "Especially if you're going to move here! Oh, you have to move here! Us scouts have to stick together!" Kat smiled at her. "You really think so?" "Of course I do! You can't stay alone! Especially now that Mamo-chan knows he has a sister. Mamo's parents... they died in a car accident when he was younger. So he's never had any blood relatives around. He was an orphan when he was younger. But I'm his family now! I could be... your family too, if you would let me." Usagi offered a soft, small, genuine smile. Kat couldn't help but feel the warmness spread through her. Though there was something that tugged sadly at her heart. How her brother grew up, it didn't sound too much different than her upbringing. Though her parents hadn't died. They had just given her up. She spent most of her life feeling unwanted, and like she didn't belong. But here, now, sitting with the five other girls, and knowing that Mamoru was in her life, it felt like she'd never really been alone at all. That night, Usagi and Katrina went to Mamoru's apartment. When they walked in, the rich smell of home-cooked udon ramen warmed the sparse living-space. "I don't cook often," Mamoru admitted, when he saw Kat eyeing the cooking food. "But this felt like an extra special occasion." He smiled at her and rested his hand atop her head, like he always used to do. It made her smile, fondly. Everything about this day had gone so much better than she had expected it to. In fact, she had been pretty sure that she wasn't even going to find her brother on this short trip at all. At the very least, she would check out Keio and talk to some professors, to see if it would be a good fit for her. But here she was, with her brother, and her new-found friend, whom she felt as if she had known her whole life. Usagi was purity and goodness and sunshine and love. It was no wonder she was Sailor Moon, and Princess Serenity. Even when she wolfed down her double chocolate parfait, leaving whipped cream and chocolate on her face, somehow Kat could still envision her as the princess of the Moon Kingdom. Even when she bickered with Rei in a losing argument, she could see it. Even when she tripped over the lip of the step up into Mamoru's apartment, Kat couldn't shake the vision of who Usagi once was; who she was destined to be. "It looks so delicious, En- Mamoru," Kat said, whilst Usagi peered over her shoulder. Usagi giggled. "Mamo-chan, it looks soooo yummy! Much better than the instant noodles that Mama buys me!" Mamoru laughed, and turned his affections to his fiancé. He slipped an arm around her waist, kissing her tenderly. Kat turned away. She wasn't used to this level of love, or any sort of stable relationship. Because of the way she'd grown up, and the deep-seeded feeling that there was something so very different inside of her, none of her relationships had lasted past the one year mark. And that was only a one time thing. All of her other relationships lasted far less, it seemed. Not that she minded - it had given her time to focus on her studies, and her job. But seeing her brother and Usagi together, Katrina felt a pang in her chest. Quietly, she pulled herself away from the small, but open kitchen, and padded around Mamoru's living space. It was very minimalistic, and she got the feeling that he didn't spend a whole lot of time here, save for sleeping. It was very clear that Usagi didn't spend more than a bit of a time here, either, as there wasn't a woman's touch to be seen. Not even a trace of clothing. "Oh, Mamo-chan! Katrina-chan is looking at enrolling at Keio!" Kat perked up at the sound of her name, and looked at the couple in the kitchenette, mainly her brother. He had one raised brow. "Oh really? What for?" He sounded genuinely interested. "Biology. Zoology to be more specific." "Yeah! Yeah! She wants to work at the zoo. Wouldn't that be so cool, Mamo-chan? She could spend all her days working with cute little animals!" Usagi was so animated. Mamoru smiled at Kat. "That doesn't surprise me. From what I can remember, you were very much an animal-whisperer, even when you were a little girl." It sounded weird having someone refer to her at such a young age. She was used to people knowing that part of her. No one had ever stuck around long enough to even try and learn. She laughed, a little self conscious now. "I guess I did spend a lot of time in the gardens, and the woods, getting to know the animals in the area." "Ooh. Like a real-life Snow White?" Usagi sounded fascinated. "Well... I never sang to them." Kat's face was a little flushed. She wasn't used to all of the attention, and positive feedback she was receiving from both of them. Kat was absolutely flabbergasted when she saw the way Usagi wolfed down three full bowls of ramen, not even waiting for them to cool down, and gasping and whining every time she took an especially hot bite. "Where does it all go?" Kat asked, half joking. Usagi shrugged. "That's what I wonder, all the time," Mamoru said with a chuckle. Once they were all finished, Usagi and Kat stood in the kitchen, cleaning the dishes. "You and Mamoru are really close, huh?" Kat asked. Usagi was happily wiping the dishes dry, and putting them away, as she went. "Of course!" she answered, without missing a beat. "I mean... he's my soul mate. And if time has proven anything to us, it's that we'll always find our way back to each other, every time." Usagi grew quiet for a moment, as if she were deep in thought. "I mean, Queen Beryl killed and brainwashed him, but he came back. Then, he was receiving warning dreams from King Endymion in the future, warning him that he might be my downfall. So we broke up. But he came back. And the Dark Moon Circus was draining his crystal with their powers, while they were here. But he never went anywhere, at least not completely. And then Galaxia... killed him. I thought he was just overseas, studying in America, and he didn't have time for me. But he came back, once I defeated the Chaos in Galaxia." "You know what I'm hearing?" "What's that?" "That you, and your love, have saved him time and time again. Without you battling to protect this planet, and everyone on it, none of us might be here right now. I really wish I had gotten to know you sooner, Usagi." Kat's voice had grown a little softer, a little more quiet. Usagi stopped wiping, and peered up at the other woman. "But... you're here now, and that's all that matters, right?" She smiled so brightly, the room seemed to glow with her energy. "Right." Kat smiled warmly back at her. "Usako!" Mamoru burst from his bathroom, in dark grey sweatpants, his hair still dripping wet from his shower. His voice was urgent. "People are being attacked downtown!"

#sailor moon #sailor earth #usagi tsukino #mamoru chiba #writing #fanfiction

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eb-byestelle · 6 years

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A word about Kaname

From the first moment when I set up an account here, I was thinking about writing a text dedicated to Kaname. Initially, I expressed my opinion through debates, editions and analysis of small details. However, it's time to fulfill my original desire and write my own Kaname Kuran's analysis.

There are already interesting, insightful analyzes of Kaname. However, none of these texts is based mainly on the screen adaptation of manga. My journey with Vampire Knight began with the anime. That's where I saw Kaname for the first time and he immediately caught my attention. So I decided that it would be an interesting difference, especially because that's where he made such a big impression on me that remained inside of me forever. Therefore, I want to not only present my analysis, but also to prove how much the screen adaptation reveals. In the second part, I will complement the analysis with manga information and juxtapose with knowledge from anime.

I have to admit that at the beginning of watching the series I fell into the trap called "poor Zero". His endless, tangible despair was emphasized in each episode. However, at the same time I started to like Kaname. In a completely different way. I was charmed and fascinated by his person. I wondered how many intriguing elements are hidden inside of him. It was visible from the very beginning. Tenderness, intelligence, strength, but also weaknesses, loneliness and this kind of darkness, which gave rise to numerous questions about how it actually came into being in him.

Soon after, when the "fumes of suffering" spread around Zero subsided, I realized that I wasn't a fan of his character, but I only felt sorry for him. With time, compassion also disappeared when I saw how many opportunities for a better life Zero lost through his doubts and the lack of a distinct personality. Pity turned into indifference. From then on, Kaname mattered.

One of the things that intrigued me in him, were various kinds of contradictions. On the one hand, he teased a vampire on level D (Zero), on the other hand he cooperated with a human, what's more, a former hunter (Cross Kaien), while hunters are his natural enemies. He also seemed to be respectful of the hunters. In other words, he respected and helped someone who in theory was his enemy. What’s more, he trusted him completely in the matter of protecting the most precious person for him.

What's more, he treated badly only one vampire of level D. - As if he had a goal in this... - I thought. Then it turned out that he wanted to instil in Zero hatred of pure-blood vampires to he would kill Rido (based on knowledge from the second season. We know from the manga that it was not just about Rido.) This was confirmed by the Kaname's satisfaction of the Zero's big hatred for him. Who wants to someone else hate him? O.O Someone who has in this some purpose. What is the purpose of a person who treats humans with respect and can love as much as he loves Yuuki? The goal is obvious - the help the weakers and the protection of the loved one.

He felt a rage that Zero was hurting Yuuki and jealousy, seeing him with her, which made that the conflict with Zero in contrary to some opinions, for me looked quite funny. I felt like I would see two boys from elementary school, where one, seeing how the other is hitting on to his girlfriend, glues the rubber to his hair, and this other one for each time thoughtlessly lets himself be provokedand and in anger he throws the books in this first one ^^"

I began to wonder that if wouldn't be his plan and his feelings for Yuuki, Zero would be probably completely indifferent for him...

What's more, besides of Seiren, I didn't see him making for himself any other servants, while as a pureblood, he could easily create a whole army of faithful subjects. Based on the Seiren's submissive behavior, more humble than the others in relation to Kaname, I concluded that she must have been a vampire of lower rank, probably created by Kaname, and basing on his tenderness towards people, it probably happened due to some sudden circumstances. (VKM explained this situation in an interesting way, combining the facts from volume 10 - Hino, thank you that among so many hopeless chapters of VKM you gave us inter alia the chap. 4 xD)

On the one hand, he told others what to do. On the other hand, when Ichijou objected to him to protect Shiki, Kaname didn't use his vampire power of pure blood to control the will of Ichijou. He didn't do anything to him. He just respected his decision. Then, when Ichijou, (already as a theoretical traitor), offered to kill Asato Ichiou by himself, Kaname only patted his shoulder and went. And he never punished him. He always liked and respected him.

The only person of the lower level from which he sometimes joked, was Aidou. Personally I have a feeling that apart from the Aidou's unruly character, who sometimes had to be "tame" (expecially that we talk about the vampire's world, where everything is even more dangerous and "unruly" behaviours are rather inadvisable) Kaname didn't respect in him that excessive, blind obedience. This is especially evident when they were a children and Kaname simply accepted the bitter words of Aidou, who initially didn't want to be friends with him. This, by the way, gave me reason to think about Kaname's self-esteem, because as we know, he didn't to Aidou anything wrong. They both just then met each other. I began to wonder if under the facade of self-confidence and always raised head there was a person who just despised herself. And if so, why?

What's more, none of the students of the night classes were intimidated by Kaname, nor were they offered any payment (I mean the two most popular ways to get someone's favors). It made that I saw it's not Kaname who is the real ruthless tyrant (although he knew for sure how to use a situation!) but they are these one who are blind to the principles instilled in them, which govern the world of the aristocracy.

I knew that his haughtiness was caused by inter alia from his social position. The high-ranking people or public figures in our world behave in a similar way. It's known that they are like this "on public", and different "in private", that's why his alleged "conceit" on public was nothing new to me. Especially when we see how humble and warm he can be in private, with Yuuki or in the past towards Juuri and Haruka. Because of the enormous power and high social position (basically the highest) he felt the burden of responsibility on himself, passing only the most important details to the others. This is visible when Aidou says that he wants to know more, on which Kaname says to Aidou not waste his life on this.

Another thing which impressed me exceptionally and which as a first draw my attention, was openness in terms of feelings. Quite often in anime/manga I see an annoying "smokescreens", games like from kindergarten, the escapes while most of series, excuses. Sometimes these "plays" are very cute, but how long? And why to behave like an idiot, don't respect a girl, or try to hide the own weakness... Meanwhile, in Kaname's case, we can see clearly what he feels for Yuuki. That he loves her, that he wants to be with her. In his feelings he is steady and determined. He's toward her nice, gallant, romantic, openly expresses feelings with words and gestures. Even when he hides something in front of her, he does it to protect her and move her away from worries. I admit that when I saw this, I felt a breeze of freshness, that after seeing so many infantile stories in other serieses I see a man who in an open and mature way offers the beloved girl his love.

Later I saw who he was before the tragedy with Rido. He loved Juuri and Haruka as if they were his real parents. Besides of this he didn't agree to Yuuki would be kept locked up. I also saw that he tried to destroy Rido by himself. When it turned out that it was impossible, he created a plan which not only gave him the highest probability of fulfilling his goal and saving his loved ones, what he couldn't do by himself. This plan also limited the number of victims to a minimum, focusing on one warrior with enormous power, which had the task of destroying the source of evil. The others were only supposed to "cover the rear".

I saw his weakness, deep sorrow and fear of losing Yuuki. It also moved me and gave me a food for thought...

I emphasize that all the time I am based only on anime.

Already there I've seen many elements of Kaname's personality worth attention. I was then so charmed by what I saw in the screen adaptation, that tbh, I felt that it's enough for me. Already then, I saw that he was a good friend, lover, brother, son, vampire. He had besides the most beautiful voice I’ve ever heard among seiyuus, but ok, it’s just btw ^^

Later, out of curiosity, I looked into the manga.

For a few obvious reasons, I'm happy that I did it. I obtained further valuable information about Kaname, including I discovered one of his greatest secrets - his age. This is very important information which changes many things. It must be included in the analysis, because in combination with his experiences it explains a lot of his behavior. Already in the anime series I knew that Kaname is the ancestor of vampires, i.e. he's not 18, as it seemed earlier. However, the information that he's 10,000 years old, makes us realize how deeply emotionally burned must be this old, tired vampire. It shows how much he had to survive, see, experience. It's unbelievable quantity of time... For some time he was so lonely that he even didn’t remember what’s his name. It's also a problematic element, because it makes it difficult to analyze the character of Kaname, i.e. someone older than any creatures known to us, even those from manga. What's more, he was born by the human while he was an immortal vampire. For these two reasons, it is different than all the vampires known in the VK universe (the another ancestors also had this second feature but none of them was so old). Fortunately, with a little deeper thought it's possible. Although still difficult ;3

What's more, it turned out that he already had once lost a close person, very suddenly and tragically, which explains his tendency to obsessions and anxiety and his fear that a loved one may be harmed or killed during his absence or temporary loss of control. Hence his possessiveness while some time.

I also got to know how much good things he did for others. Medicines for people from his own blood, help them in the collect crops, drinking blood only in a gentle way, without having to change people into his servants, help the hunters and others during the war, being one of those who initiated pacifism and living in peace. He was the first who tried to create a medicine which might to change a vampires into the humans, what is one of the evidences. He was also in a distant past the king of vampires, just and legendary to the level that Juuri and Haruka decided to named their first child by his name. (I attach a link to the post, where did the inspiration come from to mention this interesting detail, which is the giving a names in royal families >>Click<<)

These events also prompted me to ask a question: Does Kaname in the depth of his heart dream about being a human? Not being condemned to endless life, painful vampire's desires, lack of sun, a huge power that carries so much? I wrote about it during the post "Humanity”. >>Click<< Here I will only mention about it.

Next we see his boundless sacrifice because of his love to Yuuki, the sacrifice his own happiness, his own physical state (I mean discomfort because of the thirst for her blood), and his own morals. Seeing his personality, attitude and the fact that for the first 9995 years he was the definition of the word "kindness", it's ridiculous for me to say that giving Zero pain was for him completely indifferent all the time. I think that at the very beginning, while creating his plan, he felt bad and simply rejected his conscience for love and higher purposes, creating a paradox of "light and darkness" in which he started to be. If it were otherwise, the plan would bring to him a joy and satisfaction, while for real he felt doubt and self-loathing.

I was also moved by the fact that Kaname continued to help people, despite the fact that despite his previous help and goodness, they banished him because of who he was, calling him embodied blasphemy. I felt that I saw something similar before. Already in the arch 1, when Aidou rejected Kaname's friendship, and Kaname's reaction was not astonishment but the acceptance of this information, as if it was something even more correct, than if Aidou would accepted him. It's sad that someone so valuable had such a low self-esteem. What's more, his paradox of "light and shadow" deepened this state even more.

I began to ask myself why he had chosen such a way to achieve the goal instead of the previously chosen path or some other way. We already know what his purpose was. But why did he choose just this way of its realization?

Summing up his enslavement by Rido, the inability to total kill his enemy, an unique, bordering on absurdity the creature who are the hunters' twins, where one of them, thanks to the devouring of a part of the brother already in the womb, he made more powerful than other hunters, which is the most effective material on the killer, combined with the extreme long age of Kaname, and therefore also a big life experience, disappointments and internal burnout, I can confidently say that the way of achieving the goal was in his case created by one simple factor:

Lack of faith. And more specifically, the loss of faith over the years and the many experiences which led to this. Faith has been replaced by fear, despair and determination.

Everything he did in the past, before the situation with Rido, and what many of the characters of the series did, who, as we know, are young and hopeful, it was driven by faith, as evidenced by the fact that these are the actions more moral than effective. I.e. those one which don't give the same effectiveness as actions devoid of something what increases the possibility of defeat and is called "morality". The medicine is a good idea. But can it be done? How long will it take? How much damage will happen in the meantime? This is one of those plans that are not an ax that cuts through, but a subtle step forward, not knowing whether the goal will be achieved, and even if yes, it's not known when and what will happen during this time. While the plan to annihilate Rido and other pureblood vampires with someone's hands, though not very ethical, was the most effective.

It's the style of action of a person who has lost faith and puts forward the most radical steps, at which the margin of error is as small as possible.

As we know, pureblood vampires have for thousands of years preyed on the weaker, giving in to the instincts. After years, not much changed. Ex-humans continue to walk on the Earth, and purebloods after the overthrow of the corrupt council and hence, after losing the „brakes”, became even more dangerous. It comes to some kind of generalization that these creatures are a source of danger, because if in case of vampires' lower-level the people are able to simply win with them by anti-vampire weapons, in case of the pureblood vampires, they are on powerful enough that the weapon itself turns out to be not enough.

There are more an examples like this. Let Yuuki, who is still inexperienced, go outside, where there are swarms of enemies, which raises the level of danger that she will be killed or wounded, expecially in that "dangerous" year? Or to bet on effectiveness and not let her go out? After killing the council and taking control by a Kaname, other pureblood vampires started to plotting something secretly. Kaito one time mentioned about that. The evidence was visible at the vampire banquet, and the worry about Yuuki's life was justified already on the same day when Yuuki went outside. Kaname told her directly that he would do everything to Yuuki could go outside again. He knew, however, that he could allow it only when the danger would be as small as possible. Otherwise, he could rely almost exclusively on the aforementioned faith. Especially, that in the main series Yuuki was the opposite of the word "cautious" (fortunately in VKM it has changed).

I emphasized the killing of Rido, because it's possible you could have noticed that Kaname fueled the most in Zero the hatred to vampires during the plan associated with Rido in arc 1. After his death, Kaname, even though he still wanted Zero to kill all pureblood vampires, no longer he was so involved in manipulation and after some time he took matters into his own hands. This is imo an interesting detail that shows Kaname's independence, which he has previously shown through thousands years of struggle for survival in the world just after climate changes. This is also another proof that this loss of faith was what caused such a radical system of action, which I personally called the " extreme/last resort", chosen at the end of the journey, when the previous methods didn't work.

Even in case of fact he and Yuuki love each other, Kaname has lost faith that he is able to make her happy although, as we know, Yuuki was happy thanks to him a lot of times, she was ready for a relationship and she wanted to start everything once again. Besides it was also the effect of the previously mentioned low self-esteem. Seeing him as an old, tired vampire and her as an inexperienced teenager, I see some sense in this, nonetheless still seeing how great love connects them, I believe that it could have been avoided. But... after all, this is story from the type of the goddamn romantic tragedy xp However, I think that if Kaname was with Yuuki now, when they both tasted a long vampire life and a full of sun human life, I see even more potential than in the main series! But I have already talked about this on the occasion of another post ;)

Better define the matter of his, as we say, "gray" morality, it would be an absolute mistake to regard him as a villain or antagonist, i.e. a person "black" morally. For the informations for these „less informed” - He's not! Mentioned in the first part the higher goals, protection of the weaker, of the beloved girl, everything this is beautiful, noble, magnanimous. Nobody should forget about all of this, trying to understand this character. Only he also wasn't a "white" moraly person. Because who is? This is one of the many aspects that makes us see how complex the charakter of Kaname is.

Regarding his relationship with Yuuki and some single elements which have aroused controversy, I have already explained many of these behaviors. These so-called "abuse" are really the kind of overprotection which is the result of the factors discussed and has nothing to do with the cruelty. Hovewer I decided, that it's worth mentioning the famous sentence in which Kaname says that if he and Yuuki are separated, or he will kill her (which we know, that would never happen, so I don't know how idiotic someone has to be to believe it) or let her kill him. I case of these ones who say that these words are something bad - How many romances these people have seen in their life? Especially those where love is such a huge and twisted that almost crazy? Please... Such a sad texts in the style of :"If you leave me, I will die.", are in so many romances that it's just surprises me that someones are still surprised by this. This is in movies etc. one of the most popular expressions of love so deep and crazy that a person just cannot imagine life without a beloved and prefers to die than to be far away from a loved one.

Generally, in term of the knowledge from manga about Kaname, I have undoubtedly seen there its cumulating, widening wounds, suffering, weakness and burnout, through which his mental condition deteriorated significantly, resulting a wobbly attitudes and behaviors. I especially see this in comparison with the behavior of the "present" human Kaname without those traumatic memories.

I also saw, how much Yuuki and Kaname love and desire each other. Almost to the madness. The romantic scenes of these two have undoubtedly aroused my fascination. Among the various romances in the world of manga and anime, which I have seen so far, this couple is for me an intriguing difference.

At the end of the series Kaname changed the method of operation to the method of cooperation and sacrificed himself for the others, which once again proved his inner chivalry and devotion. Where did this sudden change of decision come from? I think, besides the absurd, which will be for me ridiculous probably forever, ie. that the furnance started to cool down just then, and Kaname as the most powerful vampire and protoplast, was the perfect material for a new weapon, came to the fore his gentle heart, which despite the "ash" that settled on it, still beat in his chest and could love more than ever. Kaname, regardless of the form of realisation the goal, wanted to die and he wanted to do it for the sake of Yuuki and the weaker. Appeared the opportunity, to instead of still getting own hands dirty, fulfil the goal in a more subtle way and renew the belief that even not fully effective actions are able to produce results. As we see in VKM, the lower effectiveness makes the enemies are still lurking, the danger is still big. But Kaname's wish to end the endless journey in the name of who and what he loved and wanted to protect, was fulfilled. What is beautiful - his hidden wish of being human too.

However, there are reasons why, despite so much valuable information, I'm partially discomforted because of the fact that I looked into the manga. I saw that the continuation is heading for something that, although it's still deep and moving, becomes more and more forced and overly dramatic. So dramatic that almost preposterous...

After volume 10, the plot became much more complicated, and at the same time, paradoxically devoid of the important details which we got in less complex arc 1 (regarding arc 1 ofc), which is imo a lack of respect for each character and the overall potential of the series.

Manga also turned out to be much more bothering. There appeared some single moments which became a "stodge" for the Kaname's anti-fans, whose immediately caught it, removed from the context and deprive a sense. While a story is not just single moments. They are part of a larger whole, which is accompanied by numerous elements and sources of their creation. While with the aforementioned more quanity of informations and explanations, more explicit statements, this could have been avoided, or at least reduced. Now VKM tries to fix these "shortcomings" and slowly closes the mouth of these the more embittered, showing Kaname in a very good light, highlighting the elements of his personality, which should have been even more highlighted already in the main series. This is a big plus for this addition, but it's hard not to notice that the first seed was sown.

It's interesting that the season 3 has never created. The plot of the first two seasons, ie. the first 9 volumes, I liked it the most (volume 10 was published after the anime, and was a bit filler, but for the chap 48 it's worth reading ;3). Some minor modifications in the anime, like changing the ending, subtracting certain scenes, adding others. It all showed me how good this series is able to look like, when someone new will come and manage to fix this and that. (Maybe besides of cutting the fight with Rido, which was however much better in the manga). I think it was one of the reasons why the season 3 was never created. The quanity of mistakes which Hino did after the volume 10 is really difficult to fix.

As we see, the anime shows many Kaname's features. Manga is also an important supplement, especially if someone besides of the general outline wants to really explore this special character. In anime we can also see how he moves, what voice's intonation he has. This is also very important to judge someone properly. In terms of perceiving anime, the opinions are divided, some people are delighted, others not. For me, generally the anime was a a little bit reworked copy of the manga, so I don't see much difference in the reception of this character. Music also did a lot, beautifully fitting into and emphasize the pop-gothic, melancholy climate of the series. However, I don't hide that I have always lamented that in terms of graphics (and a bit in term of animaction), the anime is limping against the absolutely resplendent drawing we see in the manga.

There is a theory that a popular series known elsewhere, gained popularity not only because of the excellent, immersive story, but also thanks to the so-called. "Shinkai's clouds", in other words, thanks to unbelievable care for graphics and animation. In case of VK, this aspect has been seriously neglected. Believe or not, but these small details really important and give a lot! I think that if the anime were drawn as fabulously as a manga, with a fluent, refined animation, in combination with the other elements that we already know, it would be something really spectacular, and the reception of the characters and the whole screen adaptation of VK would be even better.

I suppose that person who would make the best analysis of Kaname, would be his “creator”, ie. Matsuri Hino. From my side I tried to do my best to make this analysis as insightful as possible, on the occasion also evaluating the elements of the manga and its adaptation. I hope you enjoyed!

#Kaname Kuran #Vampire Knight #Vampire Knight Memories #Eternal Yume #A word about Kaname

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zacekova · 6 years

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Akagami no Shirayukihime Dragon Companion AU compilation

Okay, guys. This is getting really long and I don’t regret a thing.

This is a collection of a bunch of ideas and images from a thread on the Obiyuki discord that we’ve tossed around about an ANS AU where dragons exist. I’ve had some thoughts since then and have added my ideas to the list, but there are still a lot of blank spaces and room for expansion.

I’m listing any ANS writers/artists who have said they want to create content for any of these. PLEASE feel free to send me pictures, ideas, suggestions, alterations, questions, etc. Literally anything you can think of, anonymously or otherwise. I’ll post the asks and let it go a few rounds in the ANS fandom to see what ideas most of us seem to like best and add them to this master post.

I hope this monstrous thing serves as inspiration for some of you and is good, wholesome fun for the rest of us.

Dragons are immortal creatures that have existed since the dawn of time and come in many shapes and sizes. Most are hundreds to thousands of years old and females and babies are rare. They choose To live among humans as lifelong companions and friends, finding a new companion after the previous has died.

(Note: Dragon’s age the equivalent of about 1 year to every 7 that passes through infancy to adulthood. Once they reach maturity - around 200 years of age - they cease maturing and can live indefinitely, so far as we are aware. Some species never stop growing, some do.)

Shirayuki’s

Color: Pink

Size: Pocket (5-10 inches long)

Age: 250

Personality: Angry. Snaps and hisses at people, particularly Raj and his dragon or anyone who tries to touch her hair. Hides out in Shirayuki’s pockets and hoods - and under her hair, when it was long.

History: Gets into fights frequently despite his small size, so his face is rather smashed and mangled. Shirayuki still thinks he’s lovely.

Hoard: Insults and colorful stones

Writers/Artists:

Zen’s

Color: White

Size: 3 feet tall

Age: 800 years

Personality: Dopey and friendly. Drools a lot. Excitable. Runs around the castle knocking things over and making a nuisance of himself. Taught Zen how to climb the castle walls. Probably snores. And chases his tail, among other things.

History:

Hoard: Feathers and leaves

Writers/Artists:

Obi’s

Color: Yellow

Size: Pocket (12-15 inches long). No wings.

Age: 537

Personality: Flirtatious and clever but also kind of grumpy. Holds grudges over little things and likes to tease. Once hid inside Obi’s pants while Obi was sleeping because she was cold but Obi’s reaction in the morning was so hilarious she does it just to mess with him now.

History: A huge influence on the development of Obi’s personality - he used to be sullen and quiet but she was so annoying he had to learn to retaliate.

Hoard: Scarves (they’re warm.)

Writers/Artists:

Ryuu’s

(After growth spurt)

Color: Green, furred.

Size: Still growing.

Age: 84 (developmentally the same age as Ryuu)

Personality: Venomous.

History:

Hoard:

Writers/Artists:

Mitsuhide’s

Color: Dark blue

Size: 6 feet tall

Age: 871

Personality: Lazy. Very lazy. Sleeps everywhere on anything all the time. Is very strong and helpful but you have to get him up first. Rests his head on Mitsuhide’s shoulder when he’s awake and gives headbutts as a sign of his affection.

History:

Hoard: Sunny, cozy alcoves and rocks

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Kiki’s

Color: Iridescent purple and blue

Size: 10 feet tall

Age: 2,332

Personality: Regal, pompous, vain. A beautiful dragon and he knows it but secretly angry about his “smaller” size. Thinks dragons like Izana’s are “excessively large,” and is quite vocal about it. Likes Kiki because she is strong and beautiful and doesn’t take crap from anyone but that’s where their similarities end.

History:

Hoard: Reflective surfaces (constantly hounding Kiki to pull out her sword so he can make sure there’s nothing stuck in his teeth).

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Izana’s

Color: White

Size: 30 feet tall

Age: Unknown

Personality: Ancient and wise, but secretive. Arrogant, disdainful, cold. Has little tolerance for younger dragons. Doesn’t care for weak and stupid people, either, but he finds them amusing all the same. Izana ends up becoming a rare exception; the young King is clever enough to appeal to this dragon’s interests and he ends up begrudgingly fond and protective of Izana after a few years.

History:

Hoard: Clarines kingdom (is the companion of the king or the king’s heir exclusively).

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Zakura’s

Color: Black

Size: 12 feet tall

Age: 942

Personality:

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Haruka’s

Color: Gold

Size: 8 feet tall

Age: 2,800

Personality: Prideful and inquisitive. Spends a lot of his time reading or traveling.

History: Is a companion to Haruka’s family more than Lord Haruka himself, and is the biggest reasons for their wealth and standing in Clarines.

Hoard: Books and maps.

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Garrack’s

Color: Red Size: Age: Personality: History: Hoard: Writers/Arists:

Yuzuri’s

Color: Red and orange

Size: 20 feet tall

Age: 400

Personality: Suspicious, protective. Hot tempered and can be violent and malicious if her companion or friends are in danger.

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Suzu’s

Color: Yellow

Size: 2 feet long

Age: 250

Personality: Relaxed and lazy but very curious. Likes to lay on Suzu’s head or shoulder and read along with him while Suzu researches and asks a lot of questions until falling asleep again. Drives Yuzuri’s dragon crazy by napping on her neck just high enough that she can’t reach to nip his tail.

History:

Hoard: Pencils and pin cushions (the latter makes excellent pillows)

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Shidan’s

Color: Brown

Size: 8 inches

Age: 1,863

Personality: Dead without the canonverse’s version of coffee. Cranky and prickly and critical but secretly fond of almost everyone.

History:

Hoard: Coffee. All the coffee.

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Lata’s

Color: Black.

Size: 3 inches

Age: 5

Personality: Cheerful and curious and playful. Still just a baby.

History: Lata had never had a dragon companion before. He happened to be out in a cave hunting for stones when he stumbled across a hatching dragon. She took a liking to him despite his panicked protests that he has no idea how to take care of a baby. He does a great job not matter how much he complains and she absolutely adores him.

Hoard: Fruits and berries. She hasn’t figured out yet why they keep disappearing (Lata eats them before they go bad).

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Kirito’s

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Haki’s

Color: White

Size: 10 feet tall

Age: 1,958

Personality: Wise and clever. Offers quiet council and advice but only when the person would not be better served by figuring it out themselves.

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Makiri’s

Color: Grey

Size:15 feet tall

Age: Unkown.

Personality:

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Raj’s

Color: Reddish pink

Size: 6 inches

Age: 702

Personality:

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Hoard: Coins

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Rona’s

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Eugena’s

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Sakaki’s

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Mihaya’s

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Mukaze’s

Color: Brown and Green

Size: Unknown

Age:Unknown

Personality: Slow and steady as a mountain. Old and wise and infinitely kind. Adopts pretty much everyone on the mountain as his children. Fearsome when angered.

History:

Hoard: People

Writers/Arists: superhappybubbles

Itoya’s

Color: Grey

Size: 12 feet tall

Age: 1,442

Personality: Quiet and serious. Contemplative. Likes to sit outside and watch nature, watch the sun and moon and stars cross the sky, the water flow in the river, the birds and creatures go about their days. Patient and stubborn as stone.

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Kazuki’s 1st

Color:

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History: Umihebi killed Kazuki’s first dragon, something considered impossible before. Kazuki rarely talks about it. Umihebi became more power hungry, greedy, and arrogant than ever before.

Hoard:

Writers/Arists: superhappybubbles

Kazuki’s 2nd

Color: Brownish green.

Size: 24 inches long

Age: 23

Personality: Cheerful. Kinda dopey. Very clumsy. Basically a fearless but accident-prone little kid who wind Kazuki over by being ridiculously chirpy and lighthearted and giving Kazuki’s concerned and protective spirit one too many heart attacks by walking obliviously into danger.

History:

Hoard: Flowers and acorns

Writers/Arists: superhappybubbles

Umihebi’s

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Kihal’s

Color: Blue and green, exotic in appearance.

Size: 2 feet long

Age:

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Hoard: Snail shells

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Hisame’s

Color: Dark grey

Size: 15 feet tall

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Touka’s

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Tsuruba and Tariga’s

Color: Dark grey

Size: 10 feet tall

Age: 470

Personality:

History: Touka chained him down as a punishment to the twins once after they had made a mistake. The first thing they do after Touka dies is run back to release him.

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Shuuka’s

Color: Black

Size: 15 inches

Age: 72

Personality: Rambunctious and curious. Explores in the walls and crevices of the fort and eats the mice and rats. Hangs upside-down from the rafters to sleep. Likes to roll around and bat at people’s feet while they’re trying to walk. Basically a cat, but cuter.

History:

Hoard: Arrowheads. Two (2) mice or one (1) rat can be traded for one intact arrowhead, should the need arise.

Writers/Arists:

Shiira’s

Color: Orange

Size: 4 inches

Age: 608

Personality: A total moron. Look at that face, c’mon. He likes to climb trees and eat fruit. He screeches extremely loud with a raspy, grating tone to get Shiira’s attention, which he absolutely loathes, and gnaws on literally everything. And then just when Shiira is ready to wring his neck, he falls asleep on Shiira’s lap curled up in a tiny ball and snuffling/nuzzling at Shiira’s belly.

History:

Hoard: He seems to think every chair and bed in existence belongs to him. You got up to go get a drink? Too bad, he stole it. You want to go to sleep? Well, looks like he’s camped out right in the center and how could you possibly stand to wake something that adorable?

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Kai’s

Color: Unknown

Size: Unknown

Age: N/A

Personality: Unknown

History: Someone gave him the egg as a gift. My shipping heart wants to say Shiira, but I don’t think a lowly gate guard could afford a dragon egg.

Hoard: Unknown

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Haruto’s

Color: Purplish blue

Size: 5 feet tall

Age: 924

Personality: Happy and sweet. Likes to lick Haruto’s hand and nuzzle her side. Curls around whatever chair she sits in.

History:

Hoard: Pearls

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Yatsufusa’s

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Higata’s

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Earl Seiran’s

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Torou’s

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Atri’s

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