#OHHHHH I LOVE YOU BOY

[sieglinde-freud]

CYRIL?!

[youngyoo-apologist]

OG Choi Han they could never make me hate you cause if some random rich boy was yelling at me and telling me my family deserved to die like a day after it happened and all I wanted was to know how I could get help I’d beat him up too

This plus the added fact that the Harris Village people were the first people to take Choi Han in and take care of him after years and years in the dark forest. Like he’s obviously not going to be mentally stable after all that, and he was so young when everything happened to him like I cannot blame him at all. I don’t think I can ever hate OG Choi Han like ever, he’s flawed, he has problems, but I love him dearly. He deserves the world. This kid who had to fight for his life, was taken away from his family, and in the process had to give up parts of his own humanity to survive, and like went to war two years later, they could never make me hate u OG Choi Han…

Like yeah violence is bad I guess but OG Cale had it coming(saying this as an OG Cale fan, I love him, but he was mean as hell when he was younger!)

If I’m honest, I think they were both in the wrong to an extent. Like OG Cale shouldn’t have said all that no matter the circumstances, and OG Choi Han shouldn’t have beaten him up so much. But u say mean shit and you get hit, that is how it will work when you’re talking to the guy who just saw his entire village get murdered like idkkkk man

I understand where OG Cale was coming from, but he had many issues and while he wasn’t an awful person, he was capable of doing bad things because of his own internalized pain and emotions that he never got to properly process because of his emotionally distant childhood and relationship with his father who should have been there for him more when he was younger.

Okay speaking of his childhood, Deruth isn’t the WORST father in the world but there are a lot of things he could have done better. I think a lot of Deruth’s flaws come from his fear of failure and messing up. He’s scared of doing the wrong thing, and so he sticks to doing what he knows and using what he knows best. That’s why he uses his money, that’s why gift giving is his way of showing affection, he knows that it is one thing he cannot mess up.

The problem is that money and gifts is NOT what OG Cale needed. I think what that guy needed the most was a parent who wasn’t afraid to talk to him, to ask him questions. Not to say that Deruth gave up on OG Cale, but I think in a way he gave up on OG Cale by giving up on himself. Deruth didn’t trust himself to have the capabilities to talk to OG Cale, which is why he never did. It’s because that Deruth was scared, and didn’t trust himself, that he could never face OG Cale

If Deruth was able to trust himself a little more, and pull himself together, I don’t think OG Cale would have turned out the way he did. As a kid, he probably thought the only way he could help his family without relying on anyone(no doubt this whole ‘I have to do it myself’ thing came from the fact that he couldn’t rely on his father when his mom died, and instead was acting as a pillar of support for his father when it should have been the other way around) was to sabotage himself, the only heir. If he was shown to be unfit to be heir, then everyone else would have no choice but to direct their hatred towards him instead of his family.

If Deruth had talked to his son at least ONCE when he was a kid, asking him why he was upset or why he did the things he did, I think OG Cale would have told him. Why? Because he’s a kid!! A kid will obviously want to rely on his father, if he just had one sign telling him that he didn’t have to do it alone I’m 90% sure OG Cale would have said something.

Basically, while Deruth isn’t the worst father, he’s not really a great father either. I think he does do his best, but he has issues with communication lol

OG Cale and OG Choi Han are both complex characters and had their own reasons to behave the way they did. The thing is with people is that they’re complicated and have layers, so the situation with them would have layers behind it as well with multiple co-existing truths and stuff

[trashvampiree]

I made MORE Lost Boys memes !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! so I guess this is a part 2 (throws them at you and sprints away) (the Paul one is making me lose it the most if you were wondering)

[hoshiina]

so insanely unrelated but i very randomly miss akatsuki hyoga maybe it is time to return to my roots (second time i say this)

I was thinking about ryusui earlier today the man he is truly if you scroll through my fic recs there is the ONLY RYUSUI FIC EVER i will probably remember that fic forever

[meat-wentz]

one of the worst parts about most elder emos i’ve known irl is that they consistently talk about how kids just won’t “get” bands like fall out boy or my chemical romance and like what fucking world are you living in where teens today won’t understand bands who rose up during the first major spike of fame culture, whose privacy and artistry were constantly invaded and twisted around to be something they were not, who rose up in a scene that was misogynistic, homophobic, transphobic, ableist, and racist, whose original messaging got lost to aesthetics and mainstream misrepresentation, who consistently fought capitalistic corporate entities for their own artistic integrity and identity to be preserved, who saw the rise of immediacy and accessibility of the internet be turned against them and who felt more isolated the more their lives became available for consumption, and who WROTE AND SANG ABOUT THOSE VERY THINGS, like despite the fact that their primary audience in the aughts were teenagers and they have retained that audience for two decades, literally what world are you living in where kids today wouldn’t understand?????

[yume-fanfare]

*steps out of sudden death covered in blood* ive been fundamentally changed

[meanscarletdeceiver]

So in the first story in the Stepney book, the dynamic between Percy and Douglas is really interesting. (Especially when I edit it almost beyond recognition, lol.)

Coz they're talking about, well, you know, how there's an actual genocide of steam engines going down on the mainline. And in such a conversation you'd think Douglas would be the more grounded and worldly, yeah? Coz he's fresh from that frying pan, himself. Or maybe you'd recall that, after all, it's definitely Donald who is the brain of our Caledonians, and predict that actually Perce and Douggie are on a level.

But in fact, in this of all conversations, it's Percy who strikes me, again and again, as the more aware and open-eyed of the two. And it's all the more remarkable because Percy himself is really playing up this "oh don't ask me 🙃 I am but a simple saddletank, I do not understand the ways of the cruel and confusing outside world 🙃 I like to sing daft songs and think as little as possible 🙃" shtick to the hilt. But... what he says and how he says it doesn't bear this out at all? He got the gist of what the Fat Controller told them at the staff meeting perfectly well, thanks. The "nuance" and correction in the author's note is literally corporate propaganda and Percy is right to have tuned that line out. And he is not insensitive at all to their mainland counterparts, he feels deeply for them, but he also shows a lot of sense about how he conducts himself. Douglas has been happy to ignore any updates on the mainland situation till now—I'm not criticizing him, just pointing out that in comparison Percy has in fact paid attention and kept himself well-informed even though he goes on living his best life on Sodor. Perce is doing fine. He's excited about their visitor, as he gets excited by most grand events, but it's actually Douglas who starts immediately romanticizing and lionizing this new idol in a way that I find kind of naive...

D: 'He's sooo brave to travel among all those hordes of murderous diesels just to see us! 😍'

P: '... He has his Controller with him??'

D: 'SHORT 🤩 KING 🤩'

Douglas can't comprehend the idea of getting to Sodor with official permission, lol. Also, lookit him—he's already thirsty for Oliver before he ever meets him! My man is actually out here projecting his boyfriend fantasies onto a celebrity. How this lucky, lucky bastard had said fantasy just materialize in front of him in the moonlight at Barrow yards is beyond me. Douglas the Bullshitted His Way Onto the Island of Sodor Engine was truly built under a lucky star.

Mind you, I think Percy is right there being a short king. Like, Douggie. My babe. The way you immediately take Percy's remarks about 'it's really sad what's happening to our poor brethren on the mainland 😓' to 'yeahhh, fuckin' diesels, man. they're all devils' at the speed of light? Now I am criticizing you. Like I understand where you got this attitude but I am disappointed at your machine racism.

But Percy? Percy 💖. I will eternally love him for at once calling his friend out. 'douggie, what the fuck? you know that's not true. can it.' Like he's not super assertive about it and he doesn't press the point. But he does instantly drop the whole "i am so clueless and WHIMSICALLLL hehe" persona he'd been playing literally one second before to just speak directly and intelligibly and to the point—and he nails it. Douglas can't separate his fears about scrap from his feelings about diesels but Percy's is basically all 'it's literally so easy to not be a dick... so don't.'

[mutalune]

hey siri how do I stop feeling gutwrenchingly anxious in the guilt way for using the treatment methods available to me to not be in constant misery

[gorillaxyz]

oh hello...girl😏

[autoneurotic]

called out at work as an astarion girlie

[despairforme]

Honestly feel like if someone just loved him from a young age (canon and human verses) maybe he would have turned out different, someone who didn't see him as a beast

TURNED OUT DIFFERENT? In what way? If someone didn't see him as a BEAST, they were fucking BLIND. Nnoitra was a Hollow. HE WAS A MONSTER. From a "young age"? Meaning back before he became an Arrancar? He didn't think he'd gained much humanity by evolving, but if anything, he had been even more of a monster back then. If someone had loved him --- Would that have changed anything? It was an impossible scenario, because when Nnoitra had been an Adjuchas, nobody had been able to even approach him without him killing them. So how could someone love him? There was no room for LOVE in Hueco Mundo. It was a dog-eat-dog world, and he had the BIGGEST TEETH.

Nnoitra didn't mind being seen as a beast. As a monster. It was the simple truth about who and what he was. It was never going to change. No amount of love could alter that. He could not be tamed. Tesla should be more than enough proof of that. Nnoitra didn't know if he could say his Fraccion loved him ( could a Hollow even feel love? ), but it was the closest thing to love he'd ever experience, he was certain of that. It made no difference to how Nnoitra acted. Even Tesla, who people viewed as less of a beast than himself, had the animalistic need to kill and harm. Hollow were MONSTERS. It would never change,

Wasn't this the CLASSIC thing people thought about "bad guys". That they could be FIXED? That if someone ( their parents ) had just loved them when they were kids, they would've turned out differently? Nnoitra didn't like it when he was treated like "just a misunderstood boy". The truth was that Nnoitra had ALWAYS BEEN A BAD PERSON. From childhood. He was born bad. Born with a soul that didn't want to be saved. Born to be a person that nobody could love. It was the fundamental part of him.

He was pretty sure his mother never loved him, even if she sure as hell had tried. But she couldn't. Because it was impossible. Nnoitra tried to imagine how things would've been like if he HAD been loveable. He wasn't able to stretch his imagination that far. Everything would've been different, for sure, because Nnoitra would've been a different person from the start. If he was loveable, it would mean he wasn't a BAD PERSON, and then he wouldn't have done all the horrible things he'd done throughout his life. OF COURSE everything would've been different then! But Nnoitra wasn't going to lay the blame for his actions on anyone other than himself. He had made the decisions he'd made. Because he was a bad person.

The whole "nobody will ever love me"-attitude was a huge cliche, he knew that. That didn't make it any less true though. Time and time again, he'd proven that it truly was impossible for others to love him. Yeah, he'd be lying if he said he wished it wasn't like that. Reality couldn't be changed. There was no use fucking crying over his life. He was going to take responsibility, and keep moving forward.

[vaultsixtynine]

ana is the poster child of emotional unavailability at a level that only halsin can rival (and even then, he actually says the things he wants out loud and pursues them still - eventually) and i think astarion spends most of act 2 being mad at ana about it. certain durge scenes most certainly do NOT happen in that act, as imo they're paced weirdly for this romance and other durge stuff i want to do. she certainly is still durging, but not That. Not Yet.

neither of them ended act 1 "together" in good faith, and then. the entirety of act 2 is that unraveling - them, unraveling, in their own private ways. discarding the wheat from the chaff. getting the shit threshed out of them.

but! astarion's not really realizing a) that he's mad (as in, he knows he's Something but even as familiar as anger is, so rarely has he felt it in this shade and tone) or even b) why??? why is he UPSET about something that is blatantly benefiting him with no requirement for repayment? she's not playing his beloathed game (but she used to? why? what benefit to her was that? was she just humoring him? mocking him?) - even as he realizes he has no taste for it anymore and he is adjusting his conceptions of her day by day even as it feels like hers (of him, of course) remain stagnant.

driving him crazy. he doesn't understand what makes her tick because all she does is say words that Might mean something but mostly don't, meet everyone in the group on their level in her mellow-mannered, casual-touch-affection way, and hide in plain sight as a cipher that mirrors everyone around her for their benefit. she is trying so hard. he can see the strain, if he pays attention. he just doesn't know what drives it or why it's getting worse - besides the obvious. he's mildly infuriated by her at all times and certainly upset with himself for both wanting to be around her and also caring so much about what she is or isn't showing as 'genuine'.

i do think it takes him the entire act to say the magic words "i want this to be real" (oh, astarion, i'm sorry about the bizarre spiral you're about to kick off) because it takes him nearly the entire act to trudge through the mire of his fucked up little emotional landscape enough to realize he does have genuine feelings amid the vexation - admittedly, they spawned a decent amount of the vexation. she at no point was helpful. thank you, anathema.

[tigirl-and-co]

Hate being obsessed with something nobody cares about and in a way nobody else has ever been.

[belladonnaprice]

.

[c0rpsedemon]

CIEL'S BACK IN THE MANGA AFTER 4 YEARS?????

[kirbyddd]

huaaaaaaah dynasty warriors 8xl is just as amazing as i remembered it on the vita it's good to be back

you cant get the steam version though even after gui and graphics mods it's hot garbage i had to refund it and was thinking like "was it just always this janky and ugly looking back then??" but after refunding i got it on switch and it's BEAUTIFUL and smooth exactly how i remembered it but in HD and 60fps

amazing the difference a dedicated port with attention to quality can make over a minimal effort cash grab