#Of course they didn’t know about the Forever Potion that Travis had going on. But still

[gendervoid-zane]

Hey, do any of y’all think that any of the Emerald Secret gang (technically with the exceptions of Aaron and Aphmau) internally freaked out when they saw Travis’s eyes when they got back from the lodge???

[garrothromeave]

the hell is mystreet season 6??

(warning, long post ahead)

ok so before i start this

1) ive never posted shiiiit on tumblr before so watch me suffer, im just here to talk about stuff that my friends who dont know anything about aphmau have to listen to me rant about for hours on end

2) i havent seen mystreet in like years (except season 3, i watch that frequently since im laurance and shadow knight deprived) so please bear with me because i might be completely wrong on this lol. it’s just like, pointing out things i remember

3) im sure someones already talked about this but who cares

4) im gonna do this stupid thing where i just explain myself a bit at first, if you dont want to read that just skip to the part where you see “the actual thingy:” in bold and italics 

5) mild disclaimer; i am completely aware that jessica is not a professional writer. i know that she did her best to appeal to her fans, and honestly, respect for that. while this post will come off as aggressive and probably look like hate, that’s not my intention in the slightest. it’s just... intense criticism. im sure y’all probably already know that, but yeah, just stating that anyways. i do believe that jess is doing her best, and in no way do i want to dismiss any hard work she’s done. that being said; prepare for a very strongly opinionated post.

haha watch there be 10000+ typos in this making me look like a complete dumbass

ok here we go 

one of the main reasons i stopped watching aphmau back in 2017 was the mess that was season 4. like, in the first few episodes of the emerald secret, i thought “woah!! this is kinda cool, im a sucker for mystery!” because of course i was, it was something new and something exciting. the only problem i had with it at the time was kim, but that’s just because i always found her annoying and out of place. i just didn’t understand why garroth dragged her along and honestly i still don’t to this day BUT, moving on.

anyways, as the season progressed, 13 year old me was of course just “:0!!” the entire time--that is, up until the reveal of the main villain. i remember watching the episode, seeing the reveal of ein, and then stopping. like, just for a quick break, but i was still just overwhelmingly disappointed. like, and this was the time when pdh was airing and ein just got made alpha (i think?) and i had really really liked eins character in pdh. either way, that really sucked and actually opened my eyes to a lot of things.

one of the main things bein’ the fact that this was supposed to be a slice of life kinda series that decided to take a turn to a more edgy kinda approach. which, i guess i regularly wouldnt mind? but seeing as mcd was kinda bein neglected at the time it just didnt sit right with me. BUT WHATEVER, point is i stopped watching mystreet all together at the end of season 4.

like, a whole year later my brother tells me that shit’s getting intense in season 5 + 6 of mystreet, and my brilliant self decided to give it a shot--but i refused to watch all of season 5, so i only stepped in when ein made an appearance. so whenever that was, that’s where i picked up because i didnt care enough to see 

and y’know--i honestly didn’t hate it at first. in fact, i found it oddly cool. it wasn’t enough to get me into aphmau again, but it was enough to where i was intrigued. i dont know why, but i never watched the finale, so i didnt see the ending until just a few weeks ago--but back then, i thought it was neat. looking back on it however... im just so confused. 

side note: only got back into aphmau this time around because of mcd. mainly because like, i adore the first season and the first half of the second season. and being nearly 18 now, im a lot more appreciative of plot and well-written characters n junk. 

the actual thingy:

ok back on track. imma stop spilling out my story of how i got back into aphmau, and lets just skip to what rewatching mcd made me realize of season 6′s plot and shit:

-emmalyn. how the fuck does ghost even remotely exist? if she’s emmalyn as claimed, then why have we already seen emmalyn in the mystreet universe alive? look i get that creators can do whatever they want with their stories but at the same time please provide some sort of explanation good god. and maybe they did and i just havent seen it, so if there is one--let me know. but until that day imma just sit here confused as fuck

-ok so imma just be real, the whole ‘ultima’ thing is just... not great. in my opinion, anyways. like... i saw someone mention this in another post, but if this ultima stuff was like, a really big deal, why isnt it mentioned in mcd? though i suppose since its a curse of sorts, it could be later on past the time period in which mcd takes place--but even then, how did it manage to make its way into aaron’s family bloodline? 

-WHY IS EVERYONE AT STARLIGHT ITS JUST SO CONVINIENT like what happened to this place being the most expensive shit on the planet or whatever, and how the gang happens to run into like, the werewolf trio and blaze and kai and guy and nate all of these people like god damn life doesnt WORK LIKE THAT 

-im sorry but turning people into relics? thats... thats the best you could come up with? plus, like, how does that even work? in mcd it’s established that relics are separate entitles that choose their wielder, based on a ‘personal’ connection (being a descendent of a previous wielder) or if they’re a good match personality and (i think?) moral wise. so the whole turning-people-into-relics doesnt make much sense to be honest. 

-irene really over here using her god powers to only keep her friends alive like god damn not a great god if you ask me 

-can i talk about how incredibly predictable aphmaus death was? like i just kinda sat there waiting for it to happen and when it did i literally went “haha! wonder when she’ll be revived” because god forbid we actually kill off characters 

-when aphmau + demon warlock fought in the irene dimension there was no passage of time whatsoever in the real world whiiiiiiiiich really bothers me because they fought in there for at least a few minutes

-speaking of aphmau and the demon warlocks fight does it bother anyone else that it had to be aaron who took over the fight?? like we get it hes the big protector blah blah blah but god damn it wouldve been cooler if aphmau had fought this battle as her. aaron fighting this battle was so underwhelming

-...love. like, thats the only thing thats needed to break out of a forever potion? love? LIKE YEAH, GOOD GUYS GOTTA WIN SOMEHOW, but its just so cliche and overdoneeee

-oh yeah and also when travis went bonkers and became the demon warlock or whatever, why’d he only take over katelyn and garroth?? like, zane had been influenced by the potions in the past as well? DONT GET ME WRONG--i do love some good brother edge, but uh, the demon warlock was just bein kinda a dumbass by not possessing zane too just sayin’

-can aaron please go to fucking jail for mass murder now like holy shit, he just got sent home on a fuckin boat. also why did blaze forgive him for killing him thats not even remotely realistic. then again, nothing in mystreet has ever been realistic when it comes to characters and motives and personalities, (cough katelyn being actually abusive and travis being an actual pervert) but yknow whatever

-katelyn and kawaii chan literally added nothing to the plot whatsoever. like lets be real, katelyn lost her personality the moment season 5 started and kawaii chan just kinda sits there :I

-ok im sorry this was bound to come up but cmon guys imagine laurances potential if he was in season 6 like god damn this is beyond maddening. AND YOU KNOW WHAT WOULD HAVE BEEN A REALLY REALLY COOL PARRALLEL?? IF IT WAS LAURANCE WHO SNAPPED GARROTH OUT OF HIS MIND CONTROL THING, because it would mimic laurance’s speech to get garroth to snap out of his rage in season 1, episode 100 of minecraft diaries. like how fuckin rad would that have been? missed opportunity 

-also?? why does kim/ghost know magicks?? like, if i remember correctly, emmalyn is a scholar--not someone who knew magicks. i mean, i guess research? study?? but its been established that knowing how magicks works =/= being able to use magicks. i dunno, just doesnt seem right i guess. maybe its explained, i wouldnt know (yes i know that makes me look like a dick leave me alone)

-melissa should have stayed dead. LIKE, NO, ITS NOT AS SIMPLE AS “haha it takes more than a few bullets to kill me”??? look ive got nothing wrong with melissa (cough lie cough) but yknow it would have just been cool a character... stay dead? for once? its just too fuckin cliche that shes alive god damn

-can i also just say the only good thing that came out of season 6 was travis’ dads sacrifice like damn that made me actually sad

-howww was lucinda turned into a relic. or yknow, anyone else? like im sure they explain it better in the actual show i just dont remember, but its just that easy? turning anyone into a relic? granted, a normal person wouldnt be able to produce a good relic, but idk man. IM JUST SAYING; that the only really powerful relics that aphmau should have been able to wield is the one that aaron + zane produced because shad relic and esmund relic moment. lucinda isnt even like, connected to a divine warrior. ALSO, another point, if its seriously that powerful of a relic getting one from just a magic user like lucinda, why go through the trouble? i mean i guess ofc youd want the “all powerful” one that the ultima produces but i mean damn whats the point

-ok this is just going to bother me but in one of the episodes (i think might have been in season 5 actually) where that like, guardian dude was chasing aphmau and zane and at one point they split up and the dude just chuckles at zane diverting paths and goes under his breath “youre not the important one here”, suggesting that aphmau somehow is? first of all, id argue that any ro’meave is significantly more important than aphmau was, especially not knowing much about her other than that shes with aaron. i might be missing some bits an pieces, but if i was that dude id forget about aphmau and go after zane 

-killing off derek for shock factor sucked, and i know the moment was supposed to be really sad because like “oh :( aarons dad is sacrificing himself for his son” but lets be real dereks still was a shitty father and i dont think his reasons for doing what he did was very good at all

-less about plot or more like: why the absolute fuck did the gang bring kim along instead of, oh i dont know, a life-long friend? like, laurance or dante maybe?? im sure its explained, i never saw aphmaus year or most of season 5, but god DAMN id hate to be apart of this friend group AND GOD LIKE, imagine reconnecting with an old friend who ends up getting closer to your best friends and taking priority in their lives over you (cough laurance) like god damn lol

-im just going to preface this one with: i dont remember everything that’s happened, so if im wrong i apologize in advance--but (you actually can correct me if im wrong and please do) didnt like, irene reincarnate her friends in order to give them better lives? I DONT KNOW IF THIS IS TRUE, ITS JUST WHAT I REMEMBER--however, if im correct, then:

a. why the hell would she bring back someone like zane, or gene, or ivy, etc.

b. why the hell do they all have the same exact names? first and last? again, im aware that the whole mystreet+mcd tie wasn’t originally supposed to be there, but i dont think that means such a coincidence can be excused? its just a bit much if you ask me.

c. why the hell is the fact that (as much as i literally hate this) aaron is a decedent of shad being ignored? like, you’d think that something like this would be something thats actually important, or something the demon warlock couldve taken advantage of. or are we completely erasing every other connections to divine warriors besides aphmau + irene? because even if irene did reincarnate them or do whatever it is she did, does she even have the power to sever the connections between them and their ancestors? my guess is, no.

d. speaking of irene why on earth was aphmau able to talk to/see irene, they’re literally the same person are they not? did she like, fuckin reincarnate herself without actually doing it?? BUT--i will give it to them, the demon warlock did refer to aphmau as something along the lines of being “one of the 3 parts of her broken soul” or something like that. however, my point still remains. also what are the other two did i miss that or is it never explained

now; if irene in fact did not ‘reincarnate’ her friends then please ignore that little bit right there :)

but yes, those are a few of the problems i have with season 6 off the top of my head. i would go into like, season 4 and 5 more as well, but i honestly didnt feel like it. at some point i might go into other things, like how important laurance could have been to the plot of these later seasons, or HELL, even dante. i might also go into what could have made season 4, 5, and 6 actually good--maybe... a rewrite? perhaps? but im getting too far ahead of myself, so i just leave you with this for now.

and i know that as soon as i post this 15 more things are just going to pop into my head BUT im going to try and not edit this post because why stress myself with that even more

anyways thank you for coming to my tedtalk 

[wistfulwatcher]

I feel like I've sent you like 100 messages about CR by now and I'm only 70 episodes in BUT THE SUN TREE JUST APPEARED AGAIN AND I LOVE THE SUN TREE SO MUCH!! Also Keyleth is just like "if you need anyone to talk to, i'm here" and the sun tree is just like "well, you're gonna have to come to me, but hell yeah"

This is so delayed, you’re so much farther lol! But god HARD SAME I love Keyleth’s exchanges with the Sun Tree it is the best!! She tries so hard and he’s so chill, I want a sitcom of them tbh :P Borderline-stoner Matt is so great, I’m praying we get the Sun Tree in the next campaign.

(Putting the rest under a cut since I let these build up a disgustingly long time...)

(ep 71) It took Liam like 30 minutes to figure out that Larkin was Raishan in disguise. And everyone is just like “WAIT YOU DIDN’T KNOW?!!” Even Sam figured it out within like 5 minutes. Also Lady Kima is adorable with her love of chicken. “a spa, I don’t know what that is. Is there chicken there?” I LOVE her!

AKJFD;LKAJF I WILL NEVER BE OVER THE FACE HE MAKES WHEN HE REALIZES. And Kima!!!!!!!! MY LOVE. 

Just everything in episode 72. I think I died laughing when Keyleth turned into an elephant and Scanlan & Grog thought it was an invasion. And they were just like “IT HAS PERCY” ‘cause Percy was on top of elephant!Keyleth. And then Keyleth polymorphed back and was like “thanks guys, that thing ate me”. These dorks are adorable.

THEY ARE!!!!! I love when they lean into the moments where their characters would likely not know what’s going on to disastrous results. They play it so well, especially Sam and Travis. “That thing ate me” I LOVE KEYLETH

OF COURSE Sam wore 4 shirts and had an alarm set so that the number of different shirts he wore matched the number of episodes. Like OF COURSE. Also I am impressed that he has that many different shirts.

Sam is the BEST BIGGEST DORK he executes these kinds of ideas so well, lmao. Right!! That’s so many shirts :P

Also? Can Sam do ads for like everything? 'Cause I really enjoy them and it’s the only reason I don’t skip the intro announcements

Honestly!! I wouldn’t put up adblocker if he did! It’s such a testament to how charismatic these people are because I never skip the intro, even if I try to. Gotta see Sam’s announcements, and Laura with the merch updates, and they’re usually just cute and excited about something…they completely own my heart lol. 

(ep 75) Keyleth is so awkward in her interaction with the fire giant. That whole scene was hilarious.

SO GREAT. I love her trying to lead any interaction tbh.

(ep 75) Grog freaking getting the giant copper thing that Keyleth & Pike are carrying around & “reading” the giant inscription. He tells them that if they let it go they will instantly die. I love their shenanigans.

!!!!! I LOVE GROG SO MUCH I laughed so hard.

Pike and Grog’s friendship is so damn sweet. Episode 75, while he’s temporarily smarter and Pike teaches him the alphabet and how to write his name. And dick!Matt is like “and you forgot it all when the potion wore off”, but everyone convinces him to give Grog advantage to at least have Grog know his own name. I love them.

AKFJD;LAKFJ; THAT GODDAMN SCENE DESTROYED ME. It’s my tag for them (”and we can keep going”) because it’s just the perfect example of how cute and caring and wonderful they are together. That Grog asks, and that Pike is so patient (and has no idea what she’s doing but is There for Grog no matter what) /cries about them forever

(ep78) Everything about VM’s plan to attack Thordak. “Do you know the way there?” “oh no, but the clasp does. they’re a group of scoundrels and liars. also they hate us. we totally trust them though. also we have no other choice”. “so you plan to corner him and attack him where he lives and is most powerful?” “yes”. And “is there a weak spot?” “yes, our plan”. This is the worst plan and the only reason i know everything will be okay is it’s only episode 78.

AND WILL IS LIKE. PHYSICALLY UPSET ABOUT IT. BECAUSE IT’S JUST  S O   B A D. Right?! Had I watched that episode real time I would have developed an ulcer.

(ep 79) “Roses are red, violets are blue. I’m a gnome and you’re an asshole”. I fucking love Sam’s songs/poems/limericks.

THE BEST

I love Zahra and Vex, like Vex is adorbs and gets all fluttery and Zahra with her smirks

JDLKAJF;LKAJF MY OTP OTP THEY GET SO CUTE WITH EACH OTHER AND THEY WENT FROM ICY TO BESTIES SO FAST I LOVE THEM??? And Vex totally loses her shit around her at this point and it’s the greatest gift.

(ep81) Laura got so pissed off at Travis that she literally came out of character to just yell at him. He loves to rile her up so damn much. [this was during the deck of many things; he was about to just throw them into the lava and Laura was just like “WHAT ARE YOU DOING?!! NO!”]

I LOST MY SHIT SHE WAS SO FURIOUS AND I WAS LIVINGGGGGG. The moments when Laura’s murder face slips through the game is incredible. And I always think of that story they told in one of the Q & As about how Travis had to sleep on the couch after Grog slapped Trinket on the ass and sent him into the trap or whatever it was. Iconic, tbh. (Also, in Laura’s defense I was also Stressed when he discovered it. Just don’t do it Travis!!!!)

(ep81) I love that they found another flying carpet and Scanlan was like “hey, Allura we found you a replacement flying carpet” and Vex is all “hey Scanlan? You’re on my list.” And then Allura tells them to keep it for now and Vax is just like “don’t worry, we won’t let this one get near acid” “uh, anything that you’ve stolen from me? please keep away from acid”. I just love the flying carpet and now replacement carpet. So glad they found another one (and that Allura knows where it is now)

ALLURA IS THE SWEETEST. Of course she knew, and just looked the other way because she loves VM so much. And Vex ready to murder Scanlan for trying to give away flight is just GREAT. 

I knew I loved Sam’s ads, but oh god the Marvel Puzzle Quest one he did for episode 83. I think I died laughing. He needs to do ads for every single thing ever.

I didn’t remember which one it was so I just rewatched and gOD DAMN IT SAM WHAT A GENIUS “I played it on a Piss-4″ “Nick Furry” “Elron Man”. Every. Single. Thing.

(ep84) They’ve gotten SO paranoid about everything (with good reason). But like oh my god, they were all for taking the guy’s wife’s ashes somewhere. And all of a sudden they spent like 10 minutes being like “well, let’s check to see if there are really ashes in there”. But Pike: “they say things to make you feel bad! That’s how they sell you magazines!” “who has been trying to sell you magazines, Pike?”

DKAFJ;LDAKJF;LKA THE FUCKING ASHES. ASHLEY WAS LOSING HER MIND AND IT WAS THE ACTUAL GREATEST THING. But legit, they are SO PARANOID but for sure, it’s earned. 

(ep85) I never thought I’d be emotional over Scanlan but here we are.

*starts to tear up just thinking about it* Hard. Same. That episode was Rough. 

EPISODE 85 WHAT THE HELL SAM?! I CAN’T BELIEVE HE DID THAT! I loved how mad everyone was though. “YOU ARE TEARING THIS FAMILY APART!” Both the cast and crew were throwing things at him (which he totally deserved)

I flipped through SO MANY EMOTIONS during that episode! Laura throwing the kleenex??? Amazing. I was so sad and then so frustrated during the fight, and then it was just like WHAT A DICK SAM. They gave him hell about it for a good long time. (And still kind of do.)

(ep89) The moment where Keyleth is handing everyone their thank you necklaces she had made and she awkwardly stares at Taryone and hands him a flower and then later just hands him one of the necklaces and he just drops down to his knees and is like “ I can’t believe i’m being accepted as a full-fledged member of this team” and everyone is just like “welllll….uh…” Just. That entire moment was so awkward and hilarious and great and i really like Taryon?

I know, right?! He won me over so fast, and he’s so desperate for a family and that moment was uncomfortable in the right ways that it made you care for him more and just. Vox Machina is the best family and I’m emotional again. 

(ep89) Keyleth just turned into a dragon and Laura was like “we should have completed your aramente a lot sooner!” and like same. Like Keyleth has always been a dorky badass. But now she can turn into A DRAGON?!! Like holy crap. Also Grog took like 8 joyrides on her dragon form. Grog, living everyone’s dream of riding a dragon. Like damn.

JDAKFJ;DLAFJ EXACTLY AND ALSO IT WAS SO CUTE I love love love Grog/Keyleth moments and they’re so rare so they’re such an extra treat when we get them. They have the cutest relationship and also hard same, living the dream. 

(ep89) GROG FREAKING PRANKING TARYON WITH THE VERY OLD EGG!! (he has to consume the egg in order to get immense power). Oh god. I can't believe Grog deceived someone and I think this is officially my favorite deception so far.

I FORGOT ABOUT THAT OMG Travis enjoyed doing that way too much lmao he’s so good at it and I love Grog messing with people so much

(ep89) JUST THE ENTIRE SCENE WITH THE FLASHCARDS OF THE MEMBERS OF VM. I CRIED I WAS LAUGHING SO HARD!!

BLESS ASHLEY AND PIKE!!!!! I WILL NEVER BE OVER THE SHEER BRILLIANCE OF THAT AND MATT’S DRAWINGS I’M??? A R T

(ep90) Grog and Taryon/Dottie vs the unconscious guards. I love shopping shenanigans so damn much. Also I love that the shopkeeper Vex intimidated is back!

DAJFLDAJF;LDAKJ THE BEST SCENE OF ALL TIME TBH WHAT A DISASTER IT SPIRALED SO FAST

Every episode of Critical Role can be summarized by that part in ep93 where Travis is screaming "WHAT THE HELL WERE WE THINKING?! WE'RE SO SCREWED!" while Marisha is panicked/trying to remain calm by repeating "WE'RE GOOD WE'RE GOOD"

Oh my god it really can! It should be their tagline!!

Oh my god. Episode 95. Grog let a stranger pick a card from the deck of many things AND THE FREAKING STRANGER GETS WISHES LIKE OH MY GOD THAT WAS PROBABLY THE BEST FREAKING CARD IN THAT DECK. Everyone is so pissed that Grog did that and Travis is just like "I DIDN'T PICK THE CARD! *glares at Laura*"

DALKJF;LAKFJ;KA POOR TRAVIS HE CAN’T GET A BREAK

(ep95) Their freaking beach episode. "roll for sandcastles" BEST. ALSO Taryon's "chime of opening". HE CAN OPEN ANY DOOR. VOX MACHINA IS NOW UNSTOPPABLE. (The only thing holding them back ever were doors)

I LOST IT THAT ENTIRE EXCHANGE WAS MAGICAL!! It was so cute and happy and adorable and I live for furious!Vex ❤

(ep97) I can't believe the episode started with KEYLETH JUMPING OFF A CLIFF, TURNING INTO A GOLDFISH, AND DYING OH MY GOD. Even Matt is like "this wasn't in my plan!!!!" Oh my god.

L E G E N D A R Y. I still cannot believe any of that happened lmao I love Marisha and Keyleth but I was staring at the screen the entire time going, “wHY MARISHA WAIT NO W H Y” (I would not have changed a thing)