#P SMART+ 2019

[estethell]

For my past birthday, they gave me a new smartphone (Redmi note 12 4g). I would like to buy a nice cover but I really don't know which anime/movie to get it from 😅

[pitlanepeach]

Radio Silence | Chapter Five

Lando Norris x Amelia Brown (OFC)

Series Masterlist

Summary — Order is everything. Her habits aren't quirks, they're survival techniques. And only three people in the world have permission to touch her: Mom, Dad, Fernando.

Then Lando Norris happens.

One moment. One line crossed. No going back.

Warnings — Autistic!OFC, detailed meltdown on-page, angst.

Notes — Another double update, go me! PSA: Our Amelia has a bit of a difficult time in this one. Take care of yourselves x

Want to be added to the taglist? Let me know! - Peach x

2019

WhatsApp Groupchat — The 2019 F1 Grid

Charles L. I have found an iPad in Ferrari hospitality. It is engraved with the initials A.B. Any ideas?

Lewis H. Does it have a bunny sticker on it?

Charles L. Yes!

Lewis H. That’s Amelia’s, then.

Lando N. lol I’ll come get it just gimme 10 mins im in a debrief rn 

Charles L. Sure no problem Amelia is Zak Brown’s daughter, yes?

George R. Yeah mate The smart one.

Sebastian V. Haha. She is the one Binotto wants? Brown hair, pretty smile?

Lando N. Bro.

Lewis H. @Sebastian — Mattia has tried to get her to Ferrari?

Sebastian V. Yes. He’s offered her some very lucrative opportunities. She has so far turned all of them down.

Carlos S. She’s loyal to McLaren. Leave her to us, yes?

Valtteri B. But if she ever decided to go elsewhere, Mercedes would make sense.

Lewis H. Yeah obviously 👍🏻

Lando N. ????????????

Lance S. If she was offered a million dollars to fix the Racing Point car, do you think she’d take it? Not a hypothetical. My dad wants to know.

Max V. Money won’t work. You forget she’s already the child of a millionaire.

Lance S. Damn it.

Kimi R. Is this the child always in Norris’ garage?

Lando N. Don’t call her a child we are literally the same age

Kimi R. That does not change the fact

Daniel R. But seriously, why was she even in Ferrari hospitality in the first place?

Max V. Ice cream.

Lando N. Ice cream 

Lewis H. Ice cream.

Sebastian V. I can confirm she was here for ice cream. Pistachio, specifically.

Charles L. I cannot believe I’ve still never met her. Is she really so smart?

Lando N. Yes.

Pierre G. Absolutely.

Max V. Smarter than you are capable of comprehending, Charles.

Charles L. Then I suppose I will just have to charm her into accepting Mattia’s offer 😌

Lando N. I will put in the wall, Leclerc.

Charles L. Oh! You are together with her, Lando? I didn’t know!

Lando N. No, we’re not together.

Charles L. Then I am confused.

Max V. Her father has practically forbade them from dating. Total nonsense if you ask me.

Carlos S. They are dating.

Daniel R. @Carlos 😳😳😳

Lando N. @Carlos NO WE ARE NOT STOP SAYING THAT

Sergio P. Mucho defensive…

Carlos S. He wrote his race number on her shoes.

Lando N. So what? That means nothing.

Daniel R. Oh brother….

Max V. Yeah, sorry, I can’t even back you on that one Lando. That’s a lot.

Kimi R. My wife had my number stitched into her shoes. We got married six months later.

George R. So Kimi is saying you’re basically engaged, bro.

Lewis H. Let’s stop talking about this. Before Lando has a full on meltdown.

Charles L. Too late. He has arrived for the iPad with a terrible attitude. 

Lando N. I hate all of you.

— 

Subject: Workplace Conduct Reminder – Inclusivity & Respect at McLaren

From: HR Department To: All McLaren Racing Staff Date: [Sunday, post-race, 10:42 PM]

Dear Team,

As the season continues and tensions rise both on and off the track, we’d like to take a moment to remind everyone of McLaren’s core values — collaboration, respect, and inclusion.

We are incredibly proud of the diversity across our team, from engineering to strategy, operations to communications. Every person is here because they bring something exceptional to the table — and that includes our colleagues who may experience or perceive the world differently than others.

We ask that all team members remain mindful of the following:

Neurodiversity is not a barrier — it is an asset. Please be conscious of language and behaviour that may unintentionally alienate or diminish the contributions of individuals who may process things differently. This includes members of our extended team, trusted advisors, and collaborators who work closely with us — regardless of job title or official role.

“Vibes” are not a metric — Judging someone’s energy, personality, or communication style is not only unprofessional but also unfair. Everyone representing or contributing to McLaren, formally or informally, deserves respect.

Support one another — Whether someone wears McLaren orange full-time or contributes behind the scenes, everyone here plays a part in our collective success.

Rumours are not culture — Let’s keep paddock gossip out of professional spaces. If you have concerns, we encourage you to speak directly to your manager or HR.

This message is not in response to any one incident but rather a gentle pit stop reminder: our team functions best when everyone feels seen, heard, and safe.

If you have any questions or want to speak to someone in confidence, please feel free to reach out to HR directly. We’re here to help.

Kind regards, The McLaren Racing HR Team [hr@mclarenracing.co.uk]

— 

iMessage — 11:40pm

Lando Yo, did you see the email?

Carlos Sí.

Lando Kinda hardcore. Glad Zak did something 

Carlos Somebody said something to Amelia?

Lando Yeah someone in PR idk I feel like I should know more about her stuff I feel stupid tho. Like I don’t know anything. Just that she’s Amelia yano 

Carlos I did some reading. Come to my hotel room. We eat pizza. I will teach you what I know and we can google the rest.

Lando Legend. Thanks, mate.

— 

The course he took her to wasn’t flashy — quiet, tucked away, the kind of place her dad’s friends would never be caught dead in. That was intentional. They weren’t exactly hiding their… friendship, but they weren’t trying to advertise it either.

Amelia stared down at the club he’d handed her like it was a piece of martian debris.

“This is very stupid,” she muttered. “Pointless, really.”

“It is,” Lando agreed, his lips twitching. “Just hit the ball.”

She squinted at the tiny white ball he’d settled on the grass in front of her. “Is it supposed to just… go?”

“Yes.”

“Like in a line?” she clarified, glancing at him.

He shrugged. “In theory.”

She swung. Missed.

Lando clapped anyway. “Incredible form. I’ve never seen such calculated failure.”

“It was bad,” she said seriously. “I didn’t hit the ball. I made a hole in the grass, Lando.” She stared down at the muddy crater with quiet horror.

He just gave her an encouraging nod, gesturing for her to try again.

She sighed, feeling the beginning of a stress rash creep along her neck. But she tried again. And that time, she hit it — not far, just a lazy roll across the grass — but enough to surprise herself. Lando caught the way her eyes widened, saw the exact moment the thrill overtook her frustration.

He didn’t say anything. Just handed her another ball.

They kept going like that for a while — her slowly getting the hang of it, him slipping in dumb jokes and patient explanations between swings. She never asked for help, but he noticed how closely she watched every move he made. Her eyes, always sharp, always calculating.

Eventually, she dropped to the grass with a dramatic sigh and said, “Why do people think this is relaxing? I’m hot and my legs are tired.”

Lando chuckled and sat beside her, kicking his legs out long. “I think it’s relaxing. Your dad likes it.”

“I don’t want to talk about my dad. It makes me stressed.”

“Yeah?” He asked.

She pulled at a blade of grass, rolled it between her fingers. “He told me again that it would be better if I stayed away from you. He said it would make things easier. For me. For you. For the team.” She continued. 

Lando let the silence sit for a moment before asking, his voice quiet and slightly unsure. “What do you want?”

“I don’t know,” she shrugged. “I want him to not worry. I want him to trust me. I want…” She hesitated, frowning at the grass. “I want to feel like I can make my own choices without feeling like I might wreck everything.” 

“You’re not wrecking anything,” Lando said. He tapped the ground next to her leg and she glanced at him, blinking. “I like hanging out with you.” He told her. 

She didn’t say anything, just flicked the blade of grass from her fingers and looked at the trees that surrounded the course. “I don’t know what I feel yet,” she said finally. “Toward you, I mean. But I know that I have liked this. Today. Not the golf. Being with you.”

Lando grinned — couldn’t help himself. Probably looked like a right knob, but he didn’t care. “Want to keep playing?” He asked. 

She gave him a look. “I might get fined for ruining so much of their grass.”

He handed her another ball. Shrugged. Smirked. “It’s fine. I make a lot of money.” 

She rolled her eyes.

— 

Amelia shut her bedroom door with more force than she meant to and leaned against it, breath caught high in her chest like she’d just ran a marathon. Her bag hit the floor. Her hands were shaking.

She didn’t know why. Except; she did.

Her body was full of something too big. Too much. A knot of heat and noise and confusion that had no exit. It felt like all the inside parts of her were pressing outward, like she might split open if she didn't stay still.

She pressed her palms hard into her eyes like she could push it all back in. But it was already too late. The thoughts were everywhere; spilled oil, tangled cords, static static static. Her brain wouldn’t quiet down. Wouldn’t give her space to think.

She’d had a good day. That was the worst part. 

Lando had been good.

He never looked at her like she was difficult. He didn’t act like she was hard work. When she didn’t catch onto something the first time, he just explained again. No sighing. No staring. No pretending. Things weren’t easy with him, not exactly, but they were lighter. Easier.

She sat hard on her bed and the tears came without warning; fast, silent, relentless.

She didn’t cry often. Usually she just shut down. Usually the wall slammed down before anything could spill out. But this time everything had slipped past it, and now she was sobbing, but it didn’t even feel like crying. It felt like her whole nervous system had shattered.

A knock at the door.

“Amelia?” her mum’s voice, soft. “We just got back. Can I come in?”

She didn’t answer. Just turned her face away and wiped at it, even though the tears kept falling. Her skin was already stinging. Her chest was tight.

The door creaked open.

“I’m not upset,” Amelia said fast, panicked. “I didn’t do anything wrong. I don’t know why I feel like this. No. I do. I do. I just don’t know what to do with it. And I don’t want to talk about it—except I do. I do, I just—” She broke off, swallowing hard.

Her mum sat on the edge of the bed, calm. Grounding.

“I went out with Lando today,” Amelia said, too fast. “To play golf. His idea. He said we should do something fun. So I did. And it was fun. I didn’t freak out or embarrass myself. I didn’t ruin it. I didn’t ruin it.”

She dug her nails into her palms. Her face was blotchy and sore.

“He makes me feel normal,” she whispered. “Not small. Not like a problem. Just… me. And now I don’t know what I feel. I think I want him to be my friend. Or maybe something else. I don’t know. And I don’t want to know, because it doesn’t matter.”

“Why doesn’t it matter?” Her mum asked calmly.

Amelia blinked at her, and then, like someone flicked a switch, the anger surged. Hot and fast, like a fever.

“Because of Dad,” she spat. “Because he thinks that it would be a distraction. Because he thinks I’ll screw everything up just by being around. Like I’m some walking disease that’s gonna infect Lando’s entire career. I know that’s what he’s worried about the most.”

She was breathing too fast. Her limbs were twitching now, hands clenching and unclenching.

“I don’t have friends,” she said. “You know that. I’ve never had friends. Not ones that stay. I get too intense. Too blunt. Too weird. Too tired. And people always stop trying.”Her voice cracked. Her throat burned. “But Lando didn’t stop. He hasn’t stopped. And it’s still not enough. I still don’t get to have this one good thing without it turning into a problem.”

The sobs came back, messy and loud this time. She stood up too fast, swaying. Her hands started moving uncontrollably at her sides; jerky, uncoordinated. A warning sign. The meltdown was building and she couldn’t stop it, could never stop it. 

Her mum stood too, moving slow, blocking her path without touching her.

“Okay, sweetheart. You don’t have to think about any of that right now.” Her mom’s attempts to comfort her were useless against the onslaught of emotions she was feeling. 

“I’m so angry,” Amelia choked out. “I finally feel calm, I finally feel seen, and it’s not allowed. I’m not allowed to want something or feel something if it’s inconvenient for anyone else!”

She was trembling now. Her skin felt wrong. Her body wasn’t hers anymore. She wanted to rip it off. She wanted to scream and break things. Instead, she clenched her fists and shook and shook and shook.

“Do you want me to get your things?” her mum asked, voice calm, anchoring.

Amelia nodded hard. “Yes. My weighted blanket. And the golf ball. It’s in my bag. Lando bought it for me and I want to hold it. It’s yellow.”

“I’ll get everything,” her mum said gently.

“I’m not doing this on purpose,” Amelia shouted, the volume jarring even to herself. “I’m trying so hard. All the time. I’m always trying.”

“I know,” her mum said. “And I’m proud of you. Every day.”

Amelia slid to the floor. Her body folded in on itself, hands clawed into her sleeves, breathing uneven.

The noise in her head kept rising.

Usually, this was when she wanted her dad. Wanted him to sit next to her. Watch a race in silence. Be there without asking anything of her.

But not now.

Now, all she wanted was for him to stay far, far away.

— 

It was almost midnight.

Her room was quiet now; weighted blanket pulled up to her chest, lights off, only the soft blue glow of her phone screen lighting her face. The golf ball sat in her right hand, warm from where she’d been holding it for hours. She kept rolling it between her fingers, feeling the small ridges, the smoothness. Grounding.

She had stopped shaking, but her body was aching like one big bruised muscle. 

She stared at the message thread with Lando, her thumb hovering, retreating, hovering again.

She didn’t know what to say.

Everything in her head still felt too big. Too messy. But the quiet between them was worse. Not bad, not uncomfortable, just... unfamiliar. She wanted to talk to him. 

Finally, she started typing. 

— 

iMessage — 10:11pm

Amelia I didn’t enjoy golf very much. But I liked being with you. Thank you for inviting me.

Lando Norris I’m glad you came anyway We had fun though, right? I had fun :)

Amelia Yes, I had fun. It was confusing. But in a good way. I liked learning something new.

Lando Norris I liked today too You were kind of great We should do more new things together. Just us

Amelia Maybe. I feel strange tonight. My head is a bit loud.

Lando Norris That’s alright

Amelia Do you think if I asked you questions about your Formula Three races… you would answer them?

Lando Norris Absolutely I’d love that Haven’t talked about F3 in ages Might be nice to remember

Amelia Okay. What did it feel like the first time you won?

Lando Norris Like my hands knew before I did Like the whole world stopped for one second so I could catch up It felt… right. Like I was exactly where I was supposed to be ya know 

Amelia Oh

Lando Norris: You okay?

Amelia: I forgot all the questions I had for you. Sorry.

Lando Norris That’s okay. Don’t worry. Your brain’s probably sleepy. It’s late Are you tired?

Amelia Yes. I got upset earlier for no reason and it’s made me tired I’ll go to sleep now. Thank you for texting me back. Goodnight.

Lando Norris You don’t have to thank me for that I like talking to you Feel better soon, yeah? Goodnight x

— 

The house was still, the kind of stillness that only came after a storm.

Tracy sat on the couch in the dark, legs curled beneath her, a half-cold mug of tea resting in her hands. She hadn’t moved since she’d come downstairs after leaving Amelia. The couch blanket was draped over her shoulders, but she still shivered slightly, not from the cold, but from the heavy weight of witnessing her daughter’s pain. 

Zak entered quietly, the door clicking shut behind him. He didn’t speak at first. Just stood in the doorway, tie loose, shoulders slumped, guilt etched deep into the lines around his eyes. After a long moment, he crossed the room and sat down beside her.

Tracy didn’t look at him. Just murmured, “She’s asleep now. I checked a minute ago.”

Zak nodded slowly. “She didn’t ask for me.”

“She didn’t want to be touched. Didn’t want help. Just needed space.” Tracy’s voice cracked, but she kept it steady. “She was barely holding on, Zak. I haven’t seen her like that in a long time.”

“I didn’t mean to make it worse,” he said too quickly. “I just… I thought I was protecting her.”

“I know you did,” Tracy replied gently.

Zak stared at the floor. “I didn’t think it would hurt her like this. I thought—” He faltered. “I thought keeping her away from Lando would keep things simple. Keep her safe. From getting hurt. Or confused. Or from people talking. From getting her hopes up.”

“You didn’t trust her,” Tracy said. Not accusing, just honest.

Zak exhaled hard. “No. I didn’t trust him.”

Tracy finally turned to look at him. “But he’s been good to her. You’ve seen that, surely.” 

“I have,” Zak admitted, tersely. 

“But it wasn’t on your terms,” Tracy said. “So you didn’t like it.”

Zak didn’t argue.

“She’s not a problem to solve, Zak. She’s our daughter. And she’s doing something incredibly brave. She’s opening up. She’s connecting. That’s huge for her.”

“I know,” he said quietly. “God, I know. I just…” He broke off, ran a hand through his hair. “Why did it have to be him? Why couldn’t it have been someone safer?”

“Because love isn’t safe,” Tracy said. “And friendship isn’t simple. And if you’re lucky enough to find someone who makes you feel okay in your skin, even just for a little while, that’s not a risk for someone like her. That’s a lifeline.”

Zak leaned back, scrubbing a hand over his face. He looked hollowed out. “I feel like I’ve completely blown it.”

“You haven’t,” Tracy said gently. “But you will if you keep pushing like this. If you keep trying to prevent something that is starting to seem pretty much inevitable.” 

Zak was quiet.

“She loves you,” Tracy added. “But she can’t keep fighting you on this. Not when she’s also fighting herself. That kind of pressure… it’ll break her.”

That landed like a stone. He blinked against the sting in his eyes and nodded, slow and tired. “Okay,” he whispered. “Yeah. Okay. Fine.”

Tracy leaned into him and kissed the rough edge of his jaw. “You’re a good father, Zak. She knows that. She’ll forgive you.”

Zak didn’t answer right away. Just stared at the dark hallway.

“She didn’t ask for me,” he said again, softer this time. Raw. Frayed.

Tracy sighed and rested her head on his shoulder. “I know, honey.”

— 

The flat was quiet, except for the hum of the fridge and the occasional thump of bass through the wall from the upstairs neighbours. Lando sat cross-legged on the sofa, eyes unfocused on the muted Rally Car stream playing on the TV. Max was in the kitchen, one sock on, microwaving some disastrous smelling leftover curry.

“You ever liked someone,” Lando said suddenly, not looking up, “so much that even the idea of them ruining your life doesn’t sound that bad?”

Max made a noise that landed somewhere between a laugh and a sigh. “Christ, mate. What brought that on?”

Lando shrugged. “Dunno. I’ve just been thinking.”

“About Amelia?” Max asked, already knowing. He padded over and dropped into the armchair opposite, bowl in his lap.

Lando exhaled slowly. “I really fucking like her. It doesn’t make sense. She’s, I mean— Jesus, I don’t know. Feels like I can breathe right around her, you know?”

Max didn’t answer right away. Just stirred the curry and watched the screen for a second. Then, gently: “Yeah. I get that. But... Come on, mate. You sure this isn’t a bit too much, too fast?”

Lando looked over. Frowned. “What do you mean?”

Max shifted, trying to find words. “It’s not just about liking someone. It’s about who she is. Like, she’s your boss’s daughter. That’s... not insignificant here.”

“I know that.” Lando bit back. 

“Okay. But do you really know what it means? If something goes wrong, if it ends, and ends messy, it’s not like you can just walk away. There’s no possibility of a clean break with her.” 

Lando was quiet, but his jaw tightened.

“I’m not trying to scare you off,” Max added quickly. “I just... I know how much you’ve worked for this. Since you were, what, six? Your whole life’s been about driving. Being the best. And now you’re closer than ever.”

“I’m not giving up racing,” Lando snapped, defensive before Max even finished.

“I didn’t say you were,” Max snapped right back at him. “I just don’t want you to stop being Lando Norris: F1 driver and become Lando Norris: the guy who fucked around with his boss’ daughter, you know?”

Lando stared down at his hands. He felt like a piece of shit as he said, “Zak’s basically said the same thing. So has my dad.”

Max nodded. “‘Cause we’re all thinking the same thing, mate.” 

Lando rubbed his hands over his face and pulled his hood up. “Maybe you’re right,” he mumbled. “Maybe this isn’t... good timing.”

Max didn’t say anything. He just went back to eating, quiet again.

And Lando hated that suddenly it felt like all of their reasons made sense.

— 

The air was different now. Cooler. Thinner. The sun still came through her window in the morning, but it didn’t cling to the walls the same way. The trees had started to shift, just barely, into that pre-autumn colour. And Amelia felt like she was holding her breath all the time. For something. For nothing.

She hadn’t spoken to Lando for days. Not since she'd sent him a photo of the coffee shop in town that had spelled her name wrong again, and all she got back was a laughing emoji. No reply. No question. Just that.

It felt like a door closing very slowly. 

She was sitting in the bay window of her bedroom, blanket around her shoulders, golf ball in one hand and her phone in the other. It was the fourth time she'd opened their chat and closed it again. The most recent messages sat there like ghosts. 

—

iMessage — 9:04am

Amelia Hope you’re not too tired from training. 

—

Read. Two days ago. No response.

Her fingers hovered over the keyboard, unsure what to write that wouldn’t sound… needy. Or hurt. Or desperate. God, she hated the idea of being too much. It made her skin itch. She didn’t want to become exactly what people were always assuming that she’d be.

She pressed her palms to her eyes, trying to steady her breathing, her thoughts, her everything. But it hurt in a way she didn’t understand; this slow, quiet loss. It hurt in a way she didn’t have a name for. It felt a lot like emptiness.

“Don’t spiral,” she whispered to herself, rocking gently, rhythmically. “Don’t spiral. Don’t spiral.”

But it felt like she already was.

— 

Both McLaren cars DNF’d in Belgium; the first race back after the Summer break.

She’d written it down two hours before lights out — in the margin of an old notebook, under a page of technical notes she hadn’t meant to be looking at anymore. The exact reason. The probable lap. A strange little instinct that curled in her gut and told her today’s not going to go the way they want it to.

She closed the notebook and put it back in the drawer, and told herself it didn’t matter.

Nobody would ever know. Nobody would ever ask. Because she wasn’t in the garage. Wasn’t in the paddock. Wasn’t even watching from the hospitality suite like she always did, like clockwork.

She was in Woking. In her bedroom. As far from Lando’s garage, from the paddock, as she could possibly be.

And on the TV, when the Sky Sports commentator mentioned her absence like it was some small anomaly (“No sign of Amelia Brown in Norris’ McLaren garage today. Odd, considering she rarely misses a weekend”) she didn’t feel flattered or seen or missed.

She felt sick.

Like the air got thinner the second they said her name.

So she turned it off.

Just like that.

The screen went dark. The sound cut out. And for the first time in ten years, she didn’t watch the entire race.

Not because she didn’t want to. 

But because it hurt too much.

NEXT CHAPTER

[mariacallous]

Automakers that nest key controls deep in touchscreen menus—forcing motorists to drive eyes-down rather than concentrate on the road ahead—may have their non-US safety ratings clipped next year.

From January, Europe’s crash-testing organization EuroNCAP, or New Car Assessment Program, will incentivize automakers to fit physical, easy-to-use, and tactile controls to achieve the highest safety ratings. “Manufacturers are on notice,” EuroNCAP’s director of strategic development Matthew Avery tells WIRED, “they’ve got to bring back buttons.”

Motorists, urges EuroNCAP’s new guidance, should not have to swipe, jab, or toggle while in motion. Instead, basic controls—such as wipers, indicators, and hazard lights—ought to be activated through analog means rather than digital.

Driving is one of the most cerebrally challenging things humans manage regularly—yet in recent years manufacturers seem almost addicted to switch-free, touchscreen-laden cockpits that, while pleasing to those keen on minimalistic design, are devoid of physical feedback and thus demand visual interaction, sometimes at the precise moment when eyes should be fixed on the road.

A smattering of automakers are slowly admitting that some smart screens are dumb. Last month, Volkswagen design chief Andreas Mindt said that next-gen models from the German automaker would get physical buttons for volume, seat heating, fan controls, and hazard lights. This shift will apply “in every car that we make from now on,” Mindt told British car magazine Autocar.

Acknowledging the touchscreen snafus by his predecessors—in 2019, VW described the “digitalized” Golf Mk8 as “intuitive to operate” and “progressive” when it was neither—Mindt said, “we will never, ever make this mistake anymore … It’s not a phone, it’s a car.”

Still, “the lack of physical switchgear is a shame” is now a common refrain in automotive reviews, including on WIRED. However, a limited but growing number of other automakers are dialing back the digital to greater or lesser degrees. The latest version of Mazda’s CX-60 crossover SUV features a 12.3-inch infotainment screen, but there’s still physical switchgear for operating the heater, air-con, and heated/cooled seats. While it’s still touch-sensitive, Mazda’s screen limits what you can prod depending on the app you’re using and whether you’re in motion. There’s also a real click wheel.

But many other automakers keep their touchscreen/slider/haptic/LLM doohickeys. Ninety-seven percent of new cars released after 2023 contain at least one screen, reckons S&P Global Mobility. Yet research last year by Britain’s What Car? magazine found that the vast majority of motorists prefer dials and switches to touchscreens. A survey of 1,428 drivers found that 89 percent preferred physical buttons.

Motorists, it seems, would much prefer to place their driving gloves in a glove compartment that opens with a satisfying IRL prod on a gloriously yielding and clicking clasp, rather than diving into a digital submenu. Indeed, there are several YouTube tutorials on how to open a Tesla’s glove box. “First thing,” starts one, “is you’re going to click on that car icon to access the menu settings, and from there on, you’re going to go to controls, and right here is the option to open your glove box.” As Ronald Reagan wrote, “If you’re explaining, you’re losing.”

Voice Control Reversion

The mass psychosis to fit digital cockpits is partly explained by economics—updatable touchscreens are cheaper to fit than buttons and their switchgear—but “there’s also a natural tendency [among designers] to make things more complex than they need to be,” argues Steven Kyffin, a former dean of design and pro vice-chancellor at Northumbria University in the UK (the alma mater of button-obsessed Sir Jonny Ive).

“Creating and then controlling complexity is a sign of human power,” Kyffin says. “Some people are absolutely desperate to have the flashiest, most minimalist, most post-modern-looking car, even if it is unsafe to drive because of all the distractions.”

Automakers shouldn’t encourage such consumers. “It is really important that steering, acceleration, braking, gear shifting, lights, wipers, all that stuff which enables you to actually drive the car, should be tactile,” says Kyffin, who once worked on smart controls for Dutch electronics company Philips. “From an interaction design perspective, the shift to touchscreens strips away the natural affordances that made driving intuitive,” he says.

“Traditional buttons, dials, and levers had perceptible and actionable qualities—you could feel for them, adjust them without looking, and rely on muscle memory. A touchscreen obliterates this," says Kyffin. "Now, you must look, think, and aim to adjust the temperature or volume. That’s a huge cognitive load, and completely at odds with how we evolved to interact with driving machines while keeping our attention on the road.”

To protect themselves from driver distraction accusations, most automakers are experimenting with artificial intelligence and large language models to improve voice-activation technologies, encouraging drivers to interact with their vehicles via natural speech, negating the need to scroll through menus. Mercedes-Benz, for example, has integrated ChatGPT into its vehicles' voice-control, but it's far too early to say whether such moves will finally make good on the now old and frequently broken promise of voice-controlled car systems from multiple manufacturers.

In fact, sticking with Mercedes, the tyranny of touchscreens looks set to be with us for some time yet. The largest glass dashboard outside of China is the 56-inch, door-to-door “Hyperscreen” in the latest S-Class Mercedes comprising, in one curvaceous black slab, a 12.3-inch driver’s display, a 12.3-inch passenger touchscreen, and a 17.7-inch central touchscreen that, within submenus, houses climate control and other key functions.

To turn on the heated steering wheel on a Nissan Leaf, there’s an easy-to-reach-without-looking square button on the dashboard. To be similarly toasty on the latest Mercedes, you will have to pick through a menu on the MBUX Hyperscreen by navigating to “Comfort Settings.” (You can also use voice control, by saying “Hey Mercedes,” but even if this worked 100 percent of the time, it is not always ideal to speak aloud to your auto, as passengers may well attest.)

Tesla might have popularized the big-screen digital cockpit, but Buick started the trend with its Riviera of 1986, the first car to be fitted with an in-dash touchscreen, a 9-inch, 91-function green-on-black capacitive display known as the Graphic Control Center that featured such delights as a trip computer, climate control, vehicle diagnostics, and a maintenance reminder feature. By General Motors' own admission, drivers hated it, and it was this seemingly trailblazing feature, along with a reduction in the car's size, that supposedly led to the model's year-on-year sales plummeting by 63 percent.

Buick soon ditched the Riviera’s screen, but not before a TV science program reviewing the car asked the obvious question: “Is there a built-in danger of looking away from the road while you’re trying to use it?”

Reaction Times Worse Than Drunk or High

Screens or not, “motorists shouldn’t forget they are driving [potentially] deadly weapons,” says Kyffin. An average of 112 Americans were killed every day on US roads in 2023, according to the National Highway Traffic Safety Administration’s most recent full-year statistics. That’s equivalent to a plane crash every day.

Despite the proliferation of advanced driver-assistance systems (ADAS), motor crash fatalities in the United States have increased 21 percent in the past 15 years. Forty thousand people have died on the roads in each of the past three years for which complete federal records are available.

In-vehicle infotainment systems impair reaction times behind the wheel more than alcohol and narcotics use, according to researchers at independent British consultancy TRL. The five-year-old study, commissioned by road-safety charity IAM RoadSmart, discovered that the biggest negative impact on drivers’ reactions to hazards came when using Apple CarPlay by touch. Reaction times were nearly five times worse than when a driver was at the drink-drive limit, and nearly three times worse than when high on cannabis.

A study carried out by Swedish car magazine Vi Bilägare in 2022 showed that physical buttons are much less time-consuming to use than touchscreens. Using a mix of old and new cars, the magazine found that the most straightforward vehicle to change controls on was the 2005 Volvo V70 festooned with buttons and no screens. A range of activities such as increasing cabin temperature, tuning the radio, and turning down instrument lighting could be handled within 10 seconds in the old Volvo, and with only a minimum of eyes-down. However, the same tasks on an electric MG Marvel R compact SUV took 45 seconds, requiring precious travel time to look through the nested menus. (The tests were done on an abandoned airfield.)

Distraction plays a role in up to 25 percent of crashes in Europe, according to a report from the European Commission published last year. “Distraction or inattention while driving leads drivers to have difficulty in lateral control of the vehicle, have longer reaction times, and miss information from the traffic environment,” warned the report.

A Touch Too Far

Seemingly learning little from Buick’s Riviera, BMW reintroduced touchscreens in 2001. The brand’s iDrive system combined an LCD touchscreen with a rotary control knob for scrolling through menus. Other carmakers also soon introduced screens, although with limitations. Jaguar and Land Rover would only show certain screen functions to drivers, with passengers tasked with the fiddly bits. Toyota and Lexus cars had screens that worked only when the handbrake was applied.

With curved pillar-to-pillar displays, holographic transparent displays, displays instead of rear-view mirrors, and head-up displays (HUD), it’s clear many in-car devices are fighting for driver attention. HUDs might not be touch-sensitive, but projecting a plethora of vehicle data, as well as maps, driver aids, and multimedia information, onto the windscreen could prove as distracting as toggling through menus.

“Almost every vehicle-maker has moved key controls onto central touchscreens, obliging drivers to take their eyes off the road and raising the risk of distraction crashes,” EuroNCAP’s Avery tells WIRED. “Manufacturers are realizing that they’ve probably gone too far with [fitting touchscreens].”

“A new part of our 2026 ratings is going to relate to vehicle controls,” says Avery. “We want manufacturers to preserve the operation of five principal controls to physical buttons, so that’s wipers, lights, indicators, horn, and hazard warning lights.” This however does not address the frequent needs for drivers to adjust temperature, volume, or change driver warning systems settings (an endeavor all too commonly requiring navigating down through multiple submenus).

Perhaps unfortunately, it looks like continuing with touchscreens won’t lose manufacturers any of the coveted stars in EuroNCAP’s five-star safety ratings. “It’s not the case that [automakers] can’t get five stars unless they’ve got buttons, but we’re going to make entry to the five-star club harder over time. We will wind up the pressure, with even stricter tests in the next three-year cycle starting in 2029.”

Regardless, Avery believes auto manufacturers around the world will bring back buttons. “I will be very surprised if there are markets where manufacturers have a different strategy,” he says.

“From a safety standpoint, reducing the complexity of performing in-vehicle tasks is a good thing,” says Joe Young, the media director for the insurance industry-backed Insurance Institute for Highway Safety (IIHS). “The research is clear that time spent with your eyes off the road increases your risk of crashing, so reducing or eliminating that time by making it easier to find and manipulate buttons, dials, and knobs is an improvement.”

Neither Young nor Jake Nelson, director of traffic safety research for AAA, would be drawn on whether US automakers—via the US version of NCAP—would adopt EuroNCAP’s button nudges. “Industry design changes in the US market are more likely to occur based on strong consumer demand,” Nelson says. “It would be ideal to see better coordination between NCAP and EuroNCAP, however, we have not observed much influence in either direction.”

Nevertheless, Nelson agrees that “basic functions, such as climate control, audio, and others, should be accessible via buttons.” He adds that the “design of vehicle technologies should be as intuitive as possible for users” but that the “need for tutorials suggests otherwise.”

For Edmund King, president of the AA (the UK equivalent to AAA), driver distraction is personal. “When cycling, I often see drivers concentrating on their touchscreens rather than the road ahead," he says. "Technology should be there to help drivers and passengers stay safe on the roads, and that should not be to the detriment of other road users.”

Screen Out

The deeper introduction of AI into cars as part of software-defined vehicles could result in fewer touchscreens in the future, believes Dale Harrow, chair and director of the Intelligent Mobility Design Center at London’s Royal College of Art.

Eye scanners in cars are already watching how we’re driving and will prod us—with haptic seat buzzing and other alerts—when inattention is detected. In effect, today’s cars nag drivers not to use the touchscreens provided. “[Automakers] have added [touchscreen] technologies without thinking about how drivers use vehicles in motion,” says Harrow. “Touchscreens have been successful in static environments, but [that] doesn’t transfer into dynamic environments. There’s sitting in a mock-up of a car and thinking it’s easy to navigate through 15 layers, but it’s far different when the car is in motion.”

Crucially, touchscreens are ubiquitous partly because of cost—it’s cheaper to write lines of computer code than to add wires behind buttons on a physical dash. And there are further economies of scale for multi-brand car companies such as Volkswagen Group, which can put the same hardware and software in a Skoda as they do a Seat, changing just the logo pop-ups.

Additionally, over-the-air updates almost require in-car computer screens. A car’s infotainment system, the operation of ambient lighting, and other design factors are an increasingly important part of car design, and they need a screen for manufacturers to incrementally improve software-defined vehicles after rolling off production lines. Adding functionality isn’t nearly as simple when everything is buttons.

Not all screens cause distractions, of course—reversing cameras are now essential equipment, and larger navigation screens mean less time looking down for directions—but to demonstrate how touchscreens and voice control aren’t as clever as many think they are, consider the cockpit of an advanced passenger jet.

The Boeing 777X has touchscreens, but they are used by pilots only for data input—never for manipulation of controls. Similarly, the cockpit of an Airbus A350 also has screens, but they’re not touch-sensitive, and there are no voice-activated controls either. Instead, like in the 777X, there are hundreds of knobs, switches, gauges, and controls.

Of course, considering the precious human cargo and the fact that an A350 starts at $308 million, you can't fault Airbus for wanting pilots' eyes on the skies rather than screens. There are slightly fewer tactile controls in the $429,000 Rolls-Royce Spectre, the luxury car company’s first electric vehicle. There’s a screen for navigation, yes, but also lots of physical switchgear. Reviewing the new Black Badge edition of the high-end EV, Autocar said the vehicle’s digital technology was “integrated with restraint.”

Along with Volkswagen reintroducing physical buttons for functions like volume and climate control, Subaru is also bringing back physical knobs and buttons in the 2026 Outback. Hyundai has added more buttons back into the new Santa Fe, with design director Ha Hak-soo confessing to Korean JoongAng Daily towards the end of last year that the company found customers didn't like touchscreen–focused systems. And, if EuroNCAP gets its way, that’s likely the direction of travel for all cars. Buttons are back, baby.

[stereopticons]

On This Day in Schitt's Creek: April 19

2019

Future Plans [david/patrick, G, 1,248] by @mostlyinthemorning

Moira has some advice for Patrick after the barbeque.After S04E07 The Barbeque

nightingale [david/patrick, G, 1,198] by my_middle_name_is_awkward

David’s head continued to keep him up for another hour after he stopped texting Patrick, Stevie’s words ringing in his thoughts whenever he closed his eyes. She liked this for him. What does that even mean? Obviously, he knows she means that he and Patrick would be a good pair, but what does it mean?

Permission [david/patrick, G, 897] by @mostlyinthemorning

Patrick may have made a mistake in talking to Stevie about his plans to marry David.Before S05E12

2020

i like me better when i'm with you [david/patrick, T, 11,373] by bytheseas

Telling his sister he was in a serious relationship the week before he had to go home for his parents' vow renewal ceremony was not one of David's better life decisions. Especially since David Rose had never been in a serious relationship in his life. Or, a David/Patrick fake dating au!

Running Home [david/patrick, G, 1,779] by @mostlyinthemorning

David and Patrick take Clint and Marcy to see the new house.

Sweater Weather [david/patrick, E, 2,324] by XxFireRainDramaXx

How the night went once Stevie left. AU where D & P are cis women.

Temp Rising [david & alexis, T, 1,672] by BBirdy

"David?" "Hmm?" "Are you sure this is just a cold?" "Of course I am," he rubbed his arms, still laid like a corpse atop his comforter. "Common symptoms of a cold are sore muscles, fatigue, congestion and-" he cut himself off, hand pressed over his mouth, face shifting to a delicate green.

Terrified But the Truth Is [david/patrick, G, 1,356] by ryry_peaches

After that, he stopped telling people. It was no one's business, he justified. But he was afraid — afraid that people wouldn't think he was sexy, or smart. Or that they wouldn't treat him like an adult. Patrick isn't like that, David knows. He's pretty sure. But still… "Is that…does that bother you?" He asks, biting his lip like he can draw the question back in.

trembling hands [david/patrick, NR, 805] by @maxbegone

the earth must have titled off its axis in the middle of the night because nothing is going right today. david's having a day and patrick makes it better.

2021

coffee and catching up [patrick & twyla, g, 535] by @wafflesfriendswork

patrick goes to the cafe the day after twyla gets back from nyc and wants to hear how it goes. because he and twyla are friends. :) this was inspired by a comment on colourcodedbinders's fic, "got you."

Lesotho [johnny/moira, T, 300] by Rosey_Peach

The Recognition Scene [david/patrick, G, 2,178] by thlayli_rah

what if Rachel had showed up in Schitt's Creek before Patrick and David started dating? set right before the events of s3e13

2022

family means no one gets left behind or forgotten [david/patrick, G, 1,324] by @patrckbrewer

When Patrick tells David that he has a surprise for him before the reception, never in a million years would David have expected to see the one person who had been missing from his life.

losing my mind (don't leave me behind) [david/patrick, T, 7,573] by @rosedavid

Patrick has always been too gentle, too good, too nice for someone like David. The truth is, Patrick deserves someone better. He deserves someone who can compromise. He deserves someone who wouldn’t complain about trivial problems on a romantic hike. He deserves someone who isn’t damaged goods. A canon divergence in which Patrick doesn't propose during the hike, and David later finds the rings in his hiking bag.

Put My Name At the Top of Your List [david/patrick, E, 18,243] by @nontoxic-writes

"I'm sure Patrick has some stamps here at the store that you can use to send in your registration." David's eyes are wide when they briefly meet his. "I can't ask P— I can't just use store supplies for personal use, Alexis!" Patrick wonders if David realizes that he used the printer for his mood board for Jocelyn's shower, or that he takes pens home all the time. Hell, that he thinks he can just damage out a eucalyptus eye serum and ask Patrick to gently apply it to his face… He shuts down the memory. But what makes this different? That they're exes (god, it still stings) now and this is for a singles event? "No worries," Patrick forces himself to say, keeping his voice carefully easy. "It's just a stamp, David." But before he leaves for the night, Patrick counts the stamps on the sheet in his desk, because he's a masochist, apparently. --David and Patrick don't get back together after the barbecue and maybe both end up miserable at Singles Week. (an exes-to-lovers singles week au)

some kind of alchemy [david/patrick, M, 4,912] by @blackandwhiteandrose

Three points of view. Two relationships. One person in common. Sometimes things have to fall apart in order to fall into place.

Victorious [david/patrick, M, 215] by @a-noble-dragon

He's uncontrolled in this moment, he's beautiful in his surrendering orgasm.

What If? [gen, G, 625] by @aoubooming

Patrick goes on a hike to sort out his feelings for David, and unpack a comment made by a family member long ago.

2023

like i can't wait to feel this [stevie/twyla, E, 3,317] by @eponymiad

Stevie still isn’t sure whether she likes girls the night she gets a little tipsy at her first tailgate party in a couple years and kisses Twyla under cover of someone’s red pickup truck.*Stevie figures stuff out with some kissing, and some sex.

Parking [david/patrick, T, 664] by @fakingsincerity

This might be the most embarrassing google search of his life. He felt like he was losing his mind. making out spots elm county ontario In the absence of privacy, Patrick does some planning.

Ponder [david/patrick, G, 100] by @ramonaflow

100 words based on the Tumblr prompt: Ponder

2024

Are You Sure? [david/patrick, T, 1,048] by @wearpersistencewell

David reflects on Patrick's proposal, his past and present relationships, and letting go of old anxieties.

Stats:

No fanworks for 2017 or 2018 2019: 3 fics/3,343 words 2020: 6 fics/19,309 words 2021: 3 fics/3,013 words 2022: 6 fics/32,892 words 2023: 3 fics/4,081 words 2024: 1 fic/1,048 words Total: 21 fics/62,638 words

[queen-of-deans-booty]

Regret

Pairing: Sam Winchester x Tribrid!Fem!Reader

Word Count: ~5.3k

Warnings: major angst, no humanity!reader, forced turned into a vampire and werewolf, feeling betrayed, heartbreak

Request by anon: Hey Jordan can i request a imagine based on No Humanity Hope Mikaelson? Where the reader is a tribrid and half angel daughter of Michael or Lucifer and is dating Dean and Sam and for someone reason she chose to turn off her humanity and her boyfriends trying to she became herself again?

Summary: You're the first of your kind and the only one of your kind. Michael created you to help create new angels without asking if that's what you want to do. In order to make new angels, you have to fully become a tribrid, and you're only a witch. You don't want to turn but Michael makes it so you don't have a choice.

Square Filled: holy oil (2019) for @heavenandhellbingo

Author’s Note: the anon asked for the reader to be dating both sam and dean, but i just made it for sam!

x

Heaven is slowly breaking down and your dad is doing everything he can to prevent it from completely collapsing on itself. After Metatron kicked all the angels out, Michael got out of the cage and took over command. Most of the remaining angels have turned back over to Michael but there have been a handful who want to rebel. He has been tracking every single angel not on his side and getting rid of them.

Michael has one of those angels in Heaven tied up while you’re sitting sideways on your throne with your phone in hand.

“I’m giving you one chance to come clean. All I need are the names of the angels in the rebellion. Do you really want to go down for their mistakes?”

“Michael, please. I don’t know anything. They don’t tell me what they’re doing or who is on their team. I already told you everyone I know.”

“That’s not good enough for me. This is a good teaching moment, Y/N. I’ll show you what happened to angels who don’t deliver.” Michael looks back at you only to see you giggling like a schoolgirl on your phone. “Y/N!”

“What, I’m paying attention,” you say without looking up.

You and Sam Winchester have been dating for a few months and all you want to do is be near him. You’re in the “Honeymoon Phase” of your relationship. If your dad wasn’t such a strict person, you’d be back on Earth with Sam and Dean.

“Y/N!”

“What?” you gasp and finally look at him.

“You need to start paying attention. This is your legacy. This is who you’re meant to be so stop messing around with that Winchester and do what you were made to do.”

“What if I don’t want to?”

Michael glares at you and turns to the angel who thought he was going to get off scot-free. Michael grabs the holy oil and covers the angel with it. The lower-level angel pleads for his life but Michael has already lit the match. The angel screams as he burns alive, and your dad turns to you with a deadly glare.

“You knew what you were supposed to do the second you were created.”

Don’t you know it. He tells you all about your responsibilities every second he gets, and it’s pissing you off. You were created by his grace so you’re half angel, but he took the DNA of other monsters to create the perfect tribrid: vampire, witch, and werewolf. Both your werewolf and vampire genes are dormant so you’re only a half-witch, half-angel right now. If you were to die or kill someone, you’d activate the other parts of you.

You refuse to let that happen.

Michael created you this way since you’re meant to be so powerful that you can create other angels. If you don’t activate those other two parts of you, you can’t create new angels.

“You never let me forget it,” you sigh and sit upright.

“I am trying to make Heaven what it used to be. We are running on limited angels and if they all perish, Heaven will cease to exist.”

“Yeah, and the smart choice is to kill off more angels. I see where you’re coming from.”

“I am weeding out the bad so that only the good remains. What good is this place if we have rouge angels running amok here?”

You get up and put your phone in your back pocket.

“I am not interested in killing angels only to make new ones. I am not a killer. I am a witch who never wanted this. If you can figure out a way for me to make new angels without activating my other sides, I am all for that. I am not going to be your puppet in this sick game you’re playing. I can’t care if you’re my dad. I am not activating my other sides to become a full tribrid. Frankly, you can’t make me. Even without those sides, I’m still more powerful than you. Don’t let your arrogance be the death of you.”

You storm out of the room before he has a chance to say anything back to you. You don’t want to be here anymore. There is only one person who can make you feel better and he is on Earth. As soon as you land there, you immediately find him at some high school he and his brother were at while on a case.

Seeing Sam after all this time makes your heart flutter and your worries dissolve.

“Sam!” you grin.

“Y/N!” You run into his arms and cling to him for longer than necessary. “What are you doing here?”

“My dad pissed me off. I had to come see you.”

“We just got done with a case. We’re about to call it a night and head home tomorrow. I can get a separate room for us if you want to talk.”

“Yeah, I’d like that,” you smile. “Hi, Dean.

“Hey, kid. Don’t wear out Sammy like last time. I kind of need him,” he jokes.

“It’s not like that. Don’t be so crude.”

Dean found a relatively cheap motel to stay the night in but headed to the bar instead of his room. You and Sam got the conjoining room for yourselves, and you sit on the edge of the bed with a tired sigh.

“What’s going on? What did Michael do now?”

“He’s hell-bent on killing any angel who opposes him. Heaven is already struggling with the amount of angels now. He wants to kill off the bad so I can make more for him.”

“Make more? I thought only God could do that.”

“Michael made me with not only his grace but with the DNA of a witch, vampire, and werewolf. If I were to turn full Tribrid, I’d have enough power to create his angels. He wouldn’t need God.”

“What happened up there?” Sam asks and sits next to you.

“He was killing them. He wants me to activate my vampire and werewolf side. I’m not a killer, Sam. I don’t want this. I’ve never wanted this. Michael never cared about me. He only cares about what I can do for him. I don’t want to do this,” you sniffle.

“You don’t have to do this if you don’t want to.” Sam pulls you closer so that you can cry against his chest. He doesn’t care if your tears stain his shirt. “He can’t force you to turn.”

“I’m afraid he might be able to. All I ever wanted was to be normal. I never wanted to hurt people,” you cry.

“You won’t. Look, Dean and I are really good at hiding from angels. We’re branded. Michael can’t find us. Stay with us for a while.” You pull away from him to look into his beautiful hazel eyes. “He won’t be able to find you.”

You don’t tell him that he would be able to find you. Michael is relentless. He will do anything to get what he wants, and that includes hurting Sam and Dean. Still, you don’t see the harm in staying with Sam for the night. 

Michael is seething with anger over your fight. He doesn’t know how to make you see that you need to do this for the greater good. All he ever wants is to remake Heaven into what it was before. He can’t do that without new angels. You’re the only one besides God who can make new angels, and it’s not like his dad is going to show up anytime soon to help.

The mess of the angel’s death has been cleaned from the room that Michael is pacing in. He doesn’t know how to make you see that turning full Tribrid is a good thing. The door to the throne room opens and Lucifer walks in apprehensively.

“Wow. The entirety of Heaven heard your fight.”

“She’s being a child. She’ll come around.”

“Will she? She was pretty adamant on staying out of this one.”

“We need new angels, Lucifer. Dad’s not winning any ‘Father of the Year’ awards. We can’t rely on him to help us.”

“I agree,” Lucifer shrugs.

“Maybe I’ve been too harsh on her.”

“No, don’t give me that sympathy bullshit. She is the only one who can make new angels, right? Force her to turn. Force her to help.”

“She’d hate me.”

“As if she doesn’t already,” Lucifer scoffs. “The way I see it,  you got two options. Force her to turn and help make new angels or kill off the ones who rebel, leaving only a handful of angels to keep Heaven running. One of them gets you what you want.”

Michael stares at his younger brother in thought. You were created for one purpose and one purpose only. He hates to take away your choice but this is more urgent than your precious free will.

“What do I have to do?” Michael asks and Lucifer grins.

Lucifer tells Michael his diabolical plan which the older brother isn’t too fond of but knows it’s necessary.  Both of them go down to Earth to gather what they need. Lucifer gathers two burly humans who want nothing more than to be angels in Heaven while Michael gets two of his most trusted angels.

“What will you have us do, Lucifer?” one of the humans asks.

Lucifer grips the left shoulder of one of the men and the right shoulder of the second man so that their attention is solely on the archangel.

“Stan, you’re going to let Y/N kill you. You’re going to do whatever it takes until she kills you. Elijah, you’re going to kill Y/N and let her feed on you until you die. Only until your missions are completed, you’ll be allowed in Heaven as my brother’s trusted angels.”

Michael doesn’t tell them that he can’t make them into angels. Only you can do that but that’s neither here nor there at this point.

“I won’t let you down,” Stan says.

“I know you won’t.”

“You two,” Michael says to the two angels, “are going to make sure Sam and Dean aren’t going to be in the way. Do what you have to do to make sure they don’t interfere.”

“Yes, sir,” one of the angels nods.

Michael hates it came to this but if this is the only way you’ll have enough power to help, then so be it.

You gave yourself an extra day to be with Sam and Dean before you have to go back to Heaven and face your dad again. You’re hoping this space would have cleared his head a bit. If you work hard, you might come up with a solution that makes you powerful enough to create new angels without activating your other sides.

Sam and Dean stopped at a bar on the way back to the Bunker to hang out and let off steam before channeling through the last portion of the drive. Sam is teaching you how to play pool against Dean who isn’t going easy on you.

“Come on, Dean, can’t you be a bit more easygoing?” Sam asks.

“No, don’t do that. Let him go as hard as he wants. It’ll hurt more when I beat him,” you smirk.

“You got jokes, huh? Alright, bring it on,” Dean smirks and racks the balls.

People come and go from the bar all night until there aren’t a lot of people left. Whoever is still inside are the stragglers who try to get as much alcohol as they can before being kicked out, and those who have nowhere to go.

You two play as much as you can before the manager announces the bar is closing. You three pack up your things and leave the bar, passing by two men who are watching you.

“I told you, Dean. Don’t be too cocky.”

“Yeah, yeah, it won’t happen next time.”

You’re about halfway to the car when you hear someone behind you make a crude comment about you.

“Nice ass, sweetheart.”

You stop and turn to face them.

“Excuse me?”

“You heard me. Come home with us. We’re much more fun.”

Sam is about to step in when you put a hand on his shoulder to stop him.

“I got this,” you smile and turn to the men with the same smile. “I think you’re drunk. Turn around, go home, and we’ll forget this ever happened.”

“Now why would I want to do that? Hard to forget someone with an ass like that.”

Sam and Dean are about to step in when two more men show up and grab them. Angels. Your dad must have sent them. Wow, he really doesn’t take no for an answer.

“Okay. I get it. Michael is punking me, right? Testing me to see what I’d do? I’m not doing it. Go home before you get hurt.” You turn to face the angels when Stan grabs your shoulder and yanks you back. You swiftly face Stan and grab his collar in anger. You might be sweet and soft for Sam but you have your dad’s temper. “I said beat it before you get hurt.” You shove Stan off you and turn to the angels with fire in your eyes. “If you knew what was best for you, you’d let go of them.”

Before they have a chance to say anything back, you’re pushed violently to the side. If you didn’t have quick reflexes, you’d be on your ass in seconds. Stan sees the fire in your eyes but doesn’t back down from you.

“What are you going to do about it? A small thing like you is gonna get herself a bruise for talking back like that.”

Okay, now you’re pissed off. You stalk toward him and land a punch to his face, and he goes flying into the side of the nearest car.

“You were saying?”

Stan growls and charges at you, hell-bent on taking complete advantage of you. He’s a much bigger man than you with muscles packed on but he doesn’t have angelic grace running through his veins like you do. You dodge every one of his attempts to hit you, you make sure he doesn’t get a good hit in, all the while you are landing every punch to the side of his face and his stomach.

“I’m warning you now, man, walk away while you still can,” you growl.

“Nah. I’ll have my friends here force your little boyfriend to watch while I take every bit of innocence I know you have swimming in there,” he smirks.

If Michael is behind this, he wants you to get angry but there is something about the disgusting yellow teeth that Stan has that is making you see red. You charge at Stan and slam him into the side of the car as hard as you can, and the sickening crack of his skull is enough to put everyone into silence.

He falls to the ground with blood pooling out of his head, and you stare at him with wide, fearful eyes.

“Let me go!” Sam struggles against the angel.

“No, no, no, no,” you mutter and get on your knees next to Stan. “Don’t be dead. Do not be dead. Please don’t be dead.” Tears are streaming down your face as you check his pulse but it’s clear that Stan is no longer alive. “No! Please wake up!”

Almost immediately, you can feel your body begin changing since your werewolf side is activated. You hunch over Stan’s body and yell out in agonizing pain. It’s not a full moon but your body needs to feel the effects of your werewolf side since your DNA is changing.

“Y/N! Don’t touch her!” Sam cries out.

“You don of a bitch!” Dean struggles.

You look up at Sam with bright yellow eyes that hold so much pain. One little mistake and your entire life is changing. You look back down at the ground and yell out in pain once more, not paying attention to Elijah who is sneaking up on you.

“Y/N! Behind you!”

Sam can barely get the sentence out before Elijah shoves a knife into your back and into your heart. You gasp as the yellow in your eyes dies out. You’re not a vampire but because you had vampire DNA when you were created, you have vampire blood running through your body constantly. If you die with vampire blood in your system, you become one.

Maybe that was the goal all along.

You fall to the ground over Stan’s body. It’s then that the angels let go of Sam and Dean. They’ve fulfilled their mission so they fly out of there as soon as possible so as not to face the Winchester’s wrath. Elijah backs away from your dead body as Sam rushes over to you.

“No, Y/N! What the hell did you do?” Sam yells at Elijah while cradling your body.

“Who the hell are you?” Dean demands to know.

“I’ve fulfilled my mission,” Elijah says in a trance-like state.

“Dean, what do I do? She’s not breathing,” Sam cries and looks up at his older brother with tears in his eyes. 

Dean doesn’t know what to do either. He’s never had to deal with something like this.

“We gotta get her to a hospital. They’ll know what to do. They’ll fix her.”

Sam is about to scoop you into his arms when you wake with a gasp. Elijah walks over to the broken glass from the car that Stan was slammed into and grabs a big piece without no one noticing him.

“Y/N!”

You moan out in pain and roll onto the street so that you’re the only thing holding yourself up. Your breathing is heavy, your stomach is in knots, and your head is pounding.

“God, I’m so hungry,” you groan.

“What the hell is going on?” Dean mutters.

“You two gotta get out of here.”

“No, we’re not leaving you,” Sam says.

“Sam, I’m not joking.” Stan’s blood is making your head spin fast and you're not sure you can hold back any longer. “Get the hell out of here.”

“No. I want to help you. Tell me what will make this better.”

“This will.” Elijah cuts his neck with the broken glass and you look at him with deadly eyes. Fresh blood is so much different than dead blood. “Come on, kill me. Kill me so I can die and be with Michael.”

You’re already on your feet but pause when you hear your dad’s name.

“What did you say?”

“My mission is to kill you only to die by your hand. Michael will accept me as an angel in Heaven.”

His mission? Michael sent them? You knew that much, but he really forced these men to trigger your vampire and werewolf side? The smell of blood is too strong for you to resist so you rush over to him and sink your teeth into his neck. By drinking human blood, you have completed your transition into a vampire, thus turning yourself into a full Tribrid.

You drink every last drop Elijah has to give you and he drops to the ground, dead.

“Y/N?” Sam asks carefully and stands up.

You turn to the brothers with blood dripping down your face and tears in your eyes.

“He forced me to turn. He forced me to be this monster after I told him I wanted nothing to do with this. I never wanted to be this.”

You sob loudly at the fact that your own father betrayed your trust like this. Your emotions are heightened so when you get pissed, you’re in a vengeful rage. When you get sad, your heart breaks. You smash your fist into the window of a parked car but it doesn’t work to get the frustrations out of you.

You go around smashing windows and denting every car you see but that doesn’t make you feel any better.

“Whoa! Y/N, calm down! We’re here to help you but you need to calm down,” Dean tries.

“Baby, I know you’re feeling hurt right now but you need to calm down. Use us. Let us help you,” Sam begs.

“I can’t handle this!” You fall to your knees and cry loudly. “He betrayed me. He took everything from me.”

“I know. I know you’re feeling hurt but I’m right here to help you. Don’t give up hope now. We’ll get Michael but you need to calm down first,” Sam says.

He wants to bring you into his arms but he doesn't know how you’re going to react to that. So for now, he’ll keep his distance.

“I don’t want to feel this way. Please make it stop,” you cry.

You’re not sure how vampires can manipulate their feelings. You’re not sure how one turns off their humanity. Is it a choice? Is it a thought? Does your body choose for you? Being a vampire is so overwhelming that it hurts. The betrayal you’re feeling from your own father hurts you like you’ve never hurt before. He knew you didn’t want to be a full Tribrid. All he wants is to use you for his own gain and nothing else.

Your body does what it needs to survive and makes the decision for you.

“Just come with us back to the Bunker. It’ll be okay.”

“Yes. It will be.” You look up at Sam and Dean with your vampire face--veins underneath your eyes, yellow eyes, and both sets of fangs out. “You just won’t be part of it.”

You use your vampire speed and run over to Sam before biting into his neck. You don’t want to kill him so you take enough to render him unconscious. Dean is no match for you but he tries to fight you off. You give him the same treatment and watch as both boys are knocked out on the street.

There is only one place you want to be and it’s not on Earth.

If your dad wanted to turn you into a tribrid so bad, you’re going to show him what a mistake that was. You’re going to make him regret it.

You step foot into Heaven and immediately know something is off. Michael knows you’re here. He knows Stan and Elijah died. He knows the mission is complete. He knows you’re a tribrid. So where the hell is he?

“Yoo hoo, anybody home? Big bad vampire out here,” you announce loudly.

You walk the halls until you come to the throne room. You slam the doors open with your magic and see Michael and Lucifer standing in the middle of the room. Both of them see the blood on your face. Both of them know you’re a full Tribrid now.

“Y/N, I didn’t hear you come in,” Michael says.

“Cut the bullshit, Michael,” you growl and walk closer to them. Lucifer does the smart thing and backs away. Luckily, you’re not here for him… yet. “You did this to me. You sent those men after me and forced me to turn full Tribrid. Now you have to pay the consequences. I told you I didn’t want to be this way but you didn’t listen. You want a loyal army of angels? You won’t live to see the next sunrise.”

Michael puts some distance between the two of you and begins to beg for his life.

“I only did this because I needed you this way. You can help follow through with my plans--our plans.”

“I never wanted this!” you yell at him. “You forced me into someone I never wanted to be!” He hides behind the throne but you use your magic and shatter it to pieces. “There is nowhere on Heaven, Earth, and Hell where you can hide that I won’t find you! You never loved me! You never wanted me! You only wanted what I could do for you!”

“No, that’s not true.”

You walk over to Michale and grip his throat tightly. He claws at your hand but he’s not strong enough to get you off him.

“Guess what, Dad, turning me was a big mistake. You’re going to die and never see how I rip Heaven apart one angel at a time until I am the only one standing. I’ll make new angels but ones that will stand for everything you don’t.”

You see Lucifer disappear at a moment’s notice out of the corner of your eye. He’s going into hiding but you’ll find him eventually and drain the life out of him like you’re going to do with Michael.

Your eyes shine bright white and allow your magic to fully encase Michael. You’re not even sure how to use your powers but you let your emotions do the talking for you. You let go of Michael but he falls to his knees when your magic starts pulling his life force from him. Grey and white smoke comes from his body to your mouth as you breathe in his power.

“Y/N, please don’t do this,” Michael begs. “I never wanted this for you. I’m so sorry.”

“You should have thought of that before you sent them to kill me.”

“It was Lucifer’s idea!”

Huh, looks like he’s dying next.

“Thanks for the tip. You’re still dying anyway.”

When the last bit of smoke leaves Michael’s body, he drops to the ground, dead. Lucifer is going to be one hard person to track, especially since you don’t have control over your powers yet, but he’ll die at the hands of you eventually.

You’re not finished yet. You were serious when you told him you were going to make an army of angels all on your own. You have to get rid of the current selection first, starting with the rebellion and ending with Castiel.

“Any news on where she might be?” Sam asks his brother and Castiel.

The wound on his neck hasn’t fully healed from when you bit him. Castiel offered to heal it for him like he did Dean but Sam wants it there as a reminder. He saw the look in your eyes. He saw how betrayed you felt through the pain in your eyes. He doesn’t know much about vampires or their humanity, but he knows when you’ve flipped the switch. 

You're such a loving and caring person that he was shocked to see no hope in your eyes.

“If I had to guess, she’s in Louisiana.”

“If you had to guess?”

“She’s killing angels off one by one starting from the east coast and making her way to the west coast. I hear them over angel radio. She’s leaving no angel alive.”

“She’s lost hope,” Dean says.

“No, she’s hurt. Michael betrayed her trust and turned her into something she never wanted to be. Her emotions are heightened and she’s letting her pain guide her. She knows Michael wanted nothing more than to rebuild Heaven with new angels. She’ll make new angels but it won’t be for Michael,” Sam comes to your defense.

“That still doesn’t excuse her slaughtering all angels.”

“I’m not saying it does. All I’m saying is don’t give up on her. She’s under all that hurt and pain. It’s the only thing keeping her going right now.”

“How are we going to find her? She can kill hundreds without us knowing and already be moving onto the next state,” Dean asks.

Castiel is about to answer when he gets a splitting headache. He puts both hands to his head and leans over the desk as he waits for this to pass. Sam and Dean look at each other in confusion but allow the angel to gather himself before questioning him.

Angel radio statics in his ear before he hears a deadly calm voice.

“Prepare the Winchesters or don’t, but I’m coming for you next, Castiel. You're the only angel left standing, and I won’t let the Old World conflict with the New World. Michael and Lucifer are dead. Tell those Winchesters if they don’t want to end up like you, they won’t get in my way.”

“Cas, you okay?” Dean asks.

“I don’t think we need to find Y/N, she’s gonna find us. She’s coming for me,” Castiel sighs.

“What? What did she say?”

“Michael and Lucifer are dead. I’m the only angel left. She wants to start over. She’s coming for me.”

“We’ll be prepared,” Dean says.

“Dean, you don’t get it. She killed Michael and Lucifer, two of Heaven’s most powerful angels.  How am I to protect myself against her?”

“You have us,” Sam says. “We’ll get through to her. We’re not going to let you die.”

The Bunker is the safest place on Earth against monsters but it’s no match for you. Sam and Dean are waiting with Castiel as you expected but they’re outside instead of inside. Maybe they don’t want you destroying their home but you don’t care. You’ll kill Castiel tonight.

“I hope you know I’ll kill you two to get to him,” you state.

“Then you’re going to have to kill us,” Sam declares.

You see the wound on Sam’s neck from where you bit him and you pause. No, you can’t think about that, or else your entire world will come crumbling down. You raise your hands and Sam and Dean go flying halfway across the field. Castiel begins running at you; you have to give him credit for his bravery.

He slides an angel blade out of his coat sleeve and swings at you when he gets to you, and you put your hand up to block the attack. The angel blade slices your palm and you hiss in pain. You blast Castiel back from you and fling the angle blade out of his hands so he can’t use it on you. You produce your own with your magic and stalk toward him like he’s your prey and you’re a deadly predator.

You raise the angel blade to bring down on him but Sam jumps into action before you can.

“No!”

Sam runs to you and fits himself between you and Castiel so that if you were to bring the blade down, it’d strike Sam instead.

“No, Sammy! Don’t do that!” Dean groans.

“Don’t do it, Y/N,” Sam begs. “I know you’re still in there. Where is the woman I love?”

“Get out of my way, Sam, or I will kill you.”

“Then you’re going to have to kill me because I am not moving. This isn’t who you are.” You have a better view of Sam’s neck wound and remember the moment you bit him. You’d never do anything to hurt him. Tears line your eyes and Sam realizes that you didn't turn your humanity off. You’re acting out of hurt and betrayal because you don’t know how to yet control your emotions. “Y/N, look at who you’re about to kill. It’s Cas. He’s family.”

“God, I can’t do this,” you sob and drop the angel blade. “Sam, it hurts. Please make it stop.” Sam immediately brings you into his arms and you collapse onto the ground in a fit of tears. “I can’t do this.”

“You’re not alone, Y/N. I will help you through this. You’re going to be okay.”

“I don’t want to be this person,” you sob.

“I know. You won’t be this person. You’ll do and be better. You’re not alone.”

Sam doesn’t know how to make you feel better in this moment but he does provide a comforting arm around you. Your sobs are heartbreaking and can be heard for miles around you but you know this is the first step in healing.

And that’s all you want to do. Heal.

x

Follow my library blog @aqueenslibrary​​​​​​​​​​​​ where I reblog all my stories, so you can put notifications on there without the extra stuff :)

[mostlysignssomeportents]

This day in history

On SEPTEMBER 24th, I'll be speaking IN PERSON at the BOSTON PUBLIC LIBRARY!

#20yrsago Computer industry to entertainment industry: we lied (right on!) https://www.ecyrd.com/ButtUgly/Wiki.jsp?page=Main_blogentry_210904_1

#20yrsago Weinberger: “free access to every work of creativity in the world is a better world” https://web.archive.org/web/20040924042126/http://www.hyperorg.com/blogger/mtarchive/003080.html

#20yrsago Elvis Costello disclaims antipiracy warnings on his own CD https://web.archive.org/web/20040924000229/http://www.sciencefictiontwin.com/blog/2004/09/elvis-costello-on-anti-piracy.asp

#15yrsago Oligarch’s yacht has a laser anti-photo scre en https://www.wired.com/2009/09/russian-billionaire-installs-anti-photo-shield-on-giant-yacht/

#15yrsago Jack Kirby estate will wrest copyrights back from Disney-Marvel https://archive.nytimes.com/mediadecoder.blogs.nytimes.com/2009/09/20/in-wake-of-disney-marvel-deal-cartoonists-heirs-seek-to-reclaim-rights/

#15yrsago FCC chairman promises net neutrality except that Hollywood can spy on you and screw up your net connection if it wants to https://web.archive.org/web/20090924234046/http://openinternet.gov/read-speech.html

#15yrsago White Sands, Red Menace: Atomic age historical sf novel for young people that is sweet, sneaky, and exciting https://memex.craphound.com/2009/09/21/white-sands-red-menace-atomic-age-historical-sf-novel-for-young-people-that-is-sweet-sneaky-and-exciting/

#5yrsago Why do people believe the Earth is flat? https://www.theglobeandmail.com/opinion/article-why-do-people-believe-the-earth-is-flat/

#5yrsago Banksy celebrates the erasure of his Brexit mural: “I guess a big white flag says it just as well” https://www.instagram.com/p/B2UFBFYH_XE

#5yrsago Ed Snowden says he’ll stand trial and even go to prison in the USA if he can have a public trial and mount a public interest defense https://www.cbsnews.com/news/edward-snowden-nsa-cbs-this-morning-interview-today-2019-09-16/

#5yrsago On Fire: Naomi Klein’s book is a time-series of the shift from climate denial to nihilism to Green New Deal hope https://www.latimes.com/entertainment-arts/books/story/2019-09-19/on-fire-by-naomi-klein-green-new-deal

#5yrsago Bill Gates: if we break up Big Tech, we’ll just have more bad companies https://memex.craphound.com/2019/09/21/bill-gates-if-we-break-up-big-tech-well-just-have-more-bad-companies/

#5yrsago Propublica finds millions of Americans’ medical images and data sitting on unprotected, publicly accessible servers https://arstechnica.com/information-technology/2019/09/millions-of-americans-medical-images-and-data-are-available-on-the-internet/

#5yrsago Republic of Lies: the rise of conspiratorial thinking and the actual conspiracies that fuel it https://memex.craphound.com/2019/09/21/republic-of-lies-the-rise-of-conspiratorial-thinking-and-the-actual-conspiracies-that-fuel-it/

#1yrago "Efficiency" left the Big Three vulnerable to smart UAW tactics https://pluralistic.net/2023/09/21/eight-and-skate/#strike-to-rule

The paperback edition of The Lost Cause, my nationally bestselling, hopeful solarpunk novel is out this month!

[unclewileys-bahblog]

Hi! Can alters based off hatchetfield wiggly,nibbly,tinky,pokey and blinky?

Of course, kitty! Here they are! 🫶 /p

Name: Pokotho, Pokey, Otho

Age: Ageless

Gender: Transfem, Demiboy

Pronouns: It/it’s, Shi/hir, He/him

Sexuality: Bisexual

Species: Demonic Deity

Ethnicity: African-American

Source: Hatchetfield (The Witch in the Web, NPMD, Yellow Jacket)

Roles: Hyperfix holder, OCD holder

CisIDs: Demon, Deity, Tall, Chubby, Smart, Arrogant, Evil, Manipulative, Controlling, Greedy, OCD, Autistic, Black hair, Dyed hair, Blue hair, Blue eyes, Dark skin

TransIDS: TransLoved, PermaInControl, TransBlueBlood, TransSpecies (werewolf), TransNeonBlueEyes, TransHateful, TransHarmful, Trans🍇ist, TransRudeTone, TransAccent (japanese), TransBilingual (japanese, italian), Peppermintscentian, SeviGenderDysphoria (less), TransBPD, TransIntersex, TransAlcoholAddict, TransWorkaholic, TransKetAddict

Paraphiles: Biophilia, Consang, Sadist, Oviphilia

Other Labels: N/A

Faceclaims:

Name: Bliklotep, Blinky, The Watcher

Age: Ageless

Gender: Nonbinary, Absurdian, 💜🧠emojic

Pronouns: 💜/💜’s, They/them, He/him, Blink/blink’s, Absurd/absurdity’s, 🧠/🧠’s, Watch/watcher’s

Sexuality: Gay, Aromantic

Species: Demonic Deity

Ethnicity: Mixed

Source: Hatchetfield (Watcher World, Daddy, NPMD, The Witch in the Web)

Roles: Overseer, Gatekeeper, Emotional protector

CisIDs: Caucasian, Korean, Orange hair, Purple eyes, Pale skin, Tall, Slender, Evil, Mean, Controlling, Crude, Cold, Manipulative, OCD, Adhd, Cult leader

TransIDS: TransNPD, TransASPD, TransBrainmadeAlter, TransOrangeEyes, TransOrangeBlood, TransMarried (specifically to both alice and bill woodward), TransLoved, TransRace (black), TransFaith (jewish), TransSweetTone, TransInnocentHarmful, TransEnergyDrinkAddict, TransCoffeeAddict, TransAbled (wheelchair user), TransGroomer, TransAFAB

Paraphiles: Somnophilia, Necrophilia, Maiesiophilia

Other Labels: N/A

Faceclaims:

Name: Nibblenephim, Nibbly, Nibbles

Age: Ageless

Gender: Genderqueer

Pronouns: It/it’s, He/him, She/her

Sexuality: Pansexual

Species: Demonic Deity

Ethnicity: Mixed

Source: Hatchetfield (Honey Queen, NPMD, The Witch in the Web)

Roles: Sugar Addict Holder, Soother

CisIDs: Japanese, Hispanic, Pale skin, Trilingual (english, spanish, japanese), Greedy, Annoying, Crude, Mean, Evil, Ignorant, Selfish, Adhd, Autism, Cult leader, Cannibal

TransIDS: TransNPD, TransOCD, TransRace (pacific islander), TransBlueEyes, TransSharperFangs, TransEnergyDrinkAddict, TransCigAddict, TransRainbowBlood, TransSpecies (vampire), TransYandere, TransMarried, TransLoved, TransSeviAutism (more), TransYear (2019), TransSweetTone, TransRadioVoice

Paraphiles: FictoZoo, MAP, Hybristophilia, Oviphilia, Odontophilia, Cheirophilia

Other Labels:

Faceclaims:

Name: T’Noy Karaxis, Tinky, Nightmare Goat

Age: Ageless

Gender: Trans Man

Pronouns: It/it’s, Box/boxes, He/him

Sexuality: Pansexual

Species: Demonic Deity

Ethnicity: Mixed

Source: Hatchetfield (Time Bastard, Daddy, NPMD, The Witch in the Web)

Roles: Mood booster, Jester, Social alter

CisIDs: Non-human, Demon, Deity, Hispanic, Indigenous, Extrovert, Annoying, Evil, Controlling, Energetic, Silly, Gaslighter, Manipulative, Weird, Loud, NPD, Autism, Adhd, Orange Hair, Brown Eyes

TransIDS: TransSharperFangs, TransBPD, TransDysphoria (worse), TransHyperfixation (sea turtles, smosh, french language), TransOrangeBlood, TransOrangeEyes, Trans🍇ed, TransLesbian, TransRudeTone, TransRace (black), TransAccent (jamaican), TransBark, TransDogTongue, TransDogTherian, TransCelestialVoice, CitrusScentian, TransHappyChildhood, TransABPositive, TransCoffeeAddict, TransMethAddict, TransFujoshi, TransCriminal, TransHateful, TransHarmful

Paraphiles: Haemotophilia, ZooSadism, Emapihtophilia, Magnaphilia

Other Labels: N/A

Faceclaims:

Name: Wiggog Y’Wrath, Wiggly, Wiggles, Lord of Despair

Age: Ageless

Gender: Masc Nonbinary

Pronouns: It/it’s, Hy/hym

Sexuality: Gay, Panromantic

Species: Demonic Deity

Ethnicity: Mixed

Source: Hatchetfield (BF, NPMD, The Witch in the Web, Daddy)

Roles: Gatekeeper, Internal Self Helper

CisIDs: Non-Human, Demon, Deity, NPD, Autism, Adhd, Extrovert, Loud, Clingy, Evil, Crude, Short-tempered, Aggressive, Friendly, Childlike, Clever, Sly, Sociopathic, Manipulative, Gaslighter, Rude, Green hair, Blue eyes, Asian, Caucasian, Tan skin, Cult leader

TransIDS: TransInnocentHarmful, TransLoved, PermaWorshipped, TransGreenEyes, TransGreenBlood, TransFamous, TransCelebrity, TransRace (black), TransAccent (british), TransHeight (4’5), TransShota, TransShotaBait, TransHarmlessHarmful, TransStalker, TransGroomer, Trans🍇ist, TransHarmfulYandere, TransDeaf, TransAbled (wheelchair user), TransHappyTone, TransSweetTone, CottonCandyScentian, TransHeartPupils

Paraphiles: Drakophilia, Sadist, Autoimlaphilia, Biastophilia, Timophilia, Musophilia, Autoandrogynephilia, Kinemortophilia

Other Labels: N/A

Faceclaims:

Apologies that this took so long!

Enjoy them all, Anon!! 🫶 /gen /p

- Mod Alyssa

[theblorboscalledtheturtles]

From Rob Paulsen’s memoir:

“The truth is Raphael, cool but crude, always was the best fit for me. We’re both smart-asses, so I decided not to do an accent, dialect, or any other kind of affectation. I didn’t change my voice, and they didn’t want me to change my voice. They wanted me to fire up my sarcastic side, and I got the job.” (P. 58-59)

“I decided to audition [for Donatello] using essentially my real voice, just like Raphael. Raphael had a little harder edge, and Donatello is up higher, nerdier, but recognizable as me. (P. 116-117)

Rob Paulsen. Voice Lessons: How a Couple of Ninja Turtles, Pinky and an Animaniac Saved My Life. Tantor Media, Inc., 2019.

[skz-jae-lynn]

RE-UPLOAD! STRAY KIDS EXTRA MEMBER AU / JAE-LYNN

pronouns: she/her (but chill with she/they too)

birth name: jae-lynn reyes-wang

legal name: jae-lynn king

korean name: ji-ae (지애)

stage name: jae-lynn / jae

nickname: jae, lynnie, jade, jae-jae, jae-lynn hyung, the american girl doll, the queen (rap persona)

birthday: may 1st, 1999

zodiac: taurus(sun) scorpio (moon) pisces (rising), year of the rabbit

birthplace: east elmhurst, queens, NYC

nationality: american

ethnicity: korean and russian (dad's side), filipino (mom's side)

languages: (fluent) english, korean, spanish, tagalog, (learning) japanese & chinese

height: 5'2" / 157.48 cm

group position: main dancer, lead vocalist (vocalracha), songwriter, sub-rapper and visual

instruments: piano, guitar (electric and acoustic), bass guitar, orchestral bass, and learning drums

skzoo character: jade the purple raccoon 🦝

──────── ❝ skills ❞ ────────

rapping: ●●●○○

dancing: ●●●●●

singing: ●●●●○

producing: ●●●○○

song writing: ●●●○○

acting: ●●●●○

──────── ❝ traits ❞ ────────

positive: honest, hard-working (driven), “street smart”, confident when she wants to be, trustworthy, creative, supportive

negative: loner / introvert, blunt (doesn’t ‘beat around the bush’), impulsive, no filter, can be very lazy, idealistic, stubborn

personality type: INFP-T

face claim: Beatrice Kristi Ilejay Laus (beabadoobee) [I will also be using a variety of pics from an assortment of ig users]

voice claim: jini, devita, sabrina carpenter

dancing style: Bailey Sok, Jade Chynoweth, Briar Nolet, Autumn Miller

──────── ❝ family ❞ ────────

father - james wang (1979) [deceased]

mother - elessia reyes-torres (1982)

(c. ‘19) step father - richard torres (1980)

older brother - aleksandr "aleks" reyes-wang (1995)

older adopted sister - faith reyes-wang (1998)

little brother - ezra reyes-wang (2002)

baby half-sister - andrea “andie” reyes-torres (2020)

─────── ❝ fun facts ❞ ───────

Born in East Elmhurst, Queens, NY to Elessia and James King in 1999.

Since 2019, her mom has been remarried. 

As of 2021, Jae has 4 siblings: Aleks, Faith, Ezra, and Andrea.

Her dad died when she was 9 years old (as stated in Jae’s vlive, he was a cop and got killed on the job)

She began to dance at age 2 (ballet and jazz) and as she got older she took on more styles of dance - her favorites being contemporary and hip-hop.

Her and her older sister (Faith) were in the same dance classes for most of their lives. 

She attended PS 329Q East Elmhurst Community School (K-5) and Louis Armstrong Middle School (6th grade)

She moved to Korea at age 12 after getting scouted at her school’s dance competition and completing several at-home auditions.

She lived with her grandmother in Gwangjin-gu when she starting training  at JYP Entertainment. 

She completed middle school at Shingu Middle School and then transferred to Cheongdam High School to finish out her schooling. 

She struggled greatly with her Korean when she first moved into the country.

Her hobbies are: playing video games, watching horror movies, listening to/ playing music, doing makeup, and skateboarding. 

She has a Minecraft server (that she runs with her younger brother) where she plays with Stay almost every weekend

She is obsessed with drag race shows (especially Dragula)

She also watches a lot of youtube, mostly Trixie Mattel and Katya, spooky content youtubers (Loey Lane!!!), and gamers :P

She learned how to play the piano from her grandfather and she taught herself how to play the guitar and bass guitar. 

She loves snow and enjoys the colder seasons more than the warmer ones. 

When she first started training under JYP, her main focus was dance, but she naturally became a rapper.

As time went on, she transformed into a vocalist to fit into Stray Kids.

She was a trainee at JYP Entertainment for 6 years before debut with skz.

She was supposed to debut with Twice in 2015. 

Since 2018 she has been in a groupchat  called 'ghoulfriends’ that includes idols: Son Chaeyoung (Twice), Rosé Park (BlackPink), Jeon Somi (soloist), Kim Yeri (Red Velvet), Jeon Jiwoo (Kard), Momo Hiari (Twice), Shin Ryunjin (Itzy), and Alexa Schneiderman (soloist)

She was a co-host of Dive Studios’ show 'How Did I Get Here’ with Jae Park and AleXa (late 2020 - June 2021).

She is now a co-host to an all new series under Dive Studios, 'That's Like, Really Crazy', where the co-host that works alongside her changes per-week (the show mostly focuses on foreign members of kpop groups / the idol world, and covers korean/world media news in the form of each week being a new trending topic).

Her rapper persona used to be 'The Queen’, but now she only references the name in present-day work. Now she just goes by Jae-Lynn (/Lynnie) or Jae-Lynn King.

Her role models are Britney Spears, Beyoncé, Prince and Billie Joe Armstrong. 

She has two dogs, a golden retriever named Looney and a bulldog named Beaver, that live back in nyc.

She also has one black cat named Brownie.

Currently she has two guinea pigs, Blini and Dulce, and a cat named Naysu.

Her mom co-owns a salon with Jae’s aunt. 

She loves spicy food, and has a strong tolerance for it.

She hates aegyo, and refuses to do it. 

She has a lot of stuffed animals that she sleeps with, her favorite being a bear her and Bang Chan made at build-a-bear one year (named Roger).

LOVES BUILD-A-BEAR WITH A PASSION

She is a Hufflepuff (Harry Potter house)

Her favorite color is purple.

She has said that if she weren’t in Stray Kids she wouldn’t know what she’d be doing. 

She often releases covers or original songs for Stay. 

Calls her vlives, ’Jae-Lynn’s weekly date with Stay’ (usually happens every Friday), where she likes to react to new music that had come out during the week and give feedback, and sometimes she practices guitar or dances. 

Her, Han and IN shared a dorm room, which she called the 'J³ room’. 

In 2020, her and fellow idol, AleXa, moved in with each other into a new apartment, however later in the year, they decided to live separate.

As of 2021, Jae-Lynn now lives alone in an apartment (in the same building as the other skz members).

She has been on 5 survival shows:  Sixteen, Unpretty Rapstar 3, Stray Kids, Good Girl, and Kingdom.

She is very close with NCT’s Mark Lee - they have been best friends since they met in 2nd grade. 

She has her driver’s license, and drives her grandmother’s old car. 

She has 7+ tattoos (& counting) and she also has her nose pierced.

She has said that she doesn’t like to define her sexuality, but if she were to put a label on herself she’d be bisexual. 

She collects crystals and incense sticks (has burned sage in the old skz dorm before bc “the vibes are all off”)

She is deathly allergic to strawberries, and is mildly allergic to nutmeg and grass. 

Jae-Lynn has several solo mixtape/ep/album releases, and a wide discography (she has around 115 KOMCA credits).

Her motto: ��Until you’re ready to look foolish, you’ll never have the possibility of being great” - Cher

Jae-Lynn’s Type: Jae has said that she thinks all people are beautiful as long as they bring beauty to the world through their actions.

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[post originally from my other page @ignooy-nim. I decided to make a full page for jae-lynn just for shits and giggles, and because I was slowly losing my mind with the amount of drafts I had accumulated on that account LMAO, hope y'all enjoy this, and remember that none of this is supposed to be super serious, and that at the end of the day I AM ot8. this is just meant to be a creative writing project for me on a group I really love, so lets just have fun and create some madness together! - mars]

© ignooy-nim / skz-jae-lynn 2023 - all posts tagged with the ’skz-jae-lynn’ tag on this tumblr account are my genuine work unless stated otherwise. I only post this au on this tumblr account from here on out, so if you see anything pertaining to my work elsewhere, please be kind and reach out to me to let me know. thanks 💞

─────────────────────

[moeitsu]

This shit-post is dedicated to my weird ass friends and the most out of pocket things they've said that I've written in the quote book I've kept in my notes since 2019. Enjoy:

The mayonnaise did wonders for my hair. -P

The Holy Spirit does not want to suck your balls. -E

That's the scariest thing about Halloween...young women. -N

You can put long pasta in there! -E You mean spaghetti? -M

I don't know what blood type I am, is there an app for that? -G

You already said you wouldn't eat my ass -E

What's your major? -K Oh, I'm American. -G

I'm gonna shit in that trash can. -G

Are we about to exchange insurance cards? -J

I'm pretty sure I don't wanna warm my pussy by the fire. -M

Ugh, I don't wanna be a femboy! -M

If you're so worried about the angles then just stick your fingers in the hole. -M

I wish I could be off the grid. -M Like homeless people? -E

Who needs bleach when you have discharge. -J

Why are there panties in your hat? -G

I think I'm mentally disabled. -M No, you're just mentally ill. -E

It could be a deer with down syndrome. -D

I remember when the only app they had was angry birds. -J

Now that's the kind of guy who should be reproducing. -J

Cute rhymes with stupid. -N

No arms, no legs, not even living. But watches porn. -R

Sweaty balls doesn't sound very appetizing. -T

You're starting to look like a real girl again. -N

I always poop in other people's houses. It's how I establish dominance. -T

No sir, I am from Boston. All I know is drink coffee and cuss. -M

The gas station bathroom was treacherous. Pretty sure I saw blood on the walls. -C

If it doesn't cure you, it'll kill you! -Z

Bone dry dunes? That's where you go when you run out of cum. -E

I live by the thee S's: serve, slay, survive. -G

I will not participate in the ass licking. -E

You white people always have cool ancestors. My ancestors were slaves. -S My ancestors were responsible for that. -G

That gives me a free pass to call you a bitch. I'll take it. -N

Would anyone wanna buy my wick-less candles? Shameless plug I know. -K

C'mere, come into my womb. -G

I like your dads meat. -E

Our family funds the entire therapy on the north shore. -B

You can't be this smart w/o massive mental health problems. -B

She doesn't like gay people? -M Nope, she's up in the air about black people too. -P

We're back to our regularly scheduled racism. -R

That's abortion money, not pedicure money. -K

I'm gonna give you a disability if you don't stop. -M

I can always fuck up chicken. Especially the breast. -N

Nice parking job Alabama. Was your sister giving you head while you were driving? -N

I don't think calories are real. I've never seen one. -M

Do you even know what man boobs are? -E It's literally in the name. -M

Can't men flick their nipples off? -E

Well, 5 out of 6 of us were born with a full spine. -E

What's the point of having a gf if you can't objectify her? -N

Mother fucker we don't own straws. We broke as shit. -N

You're like a lollipop triple dipped in psycho flavor. -P

What are you just not gonna feed your kid so you can afford to go to Disney? -A

Do you think she's trans? Like she was a dude and now she's a guy? -N You mean she was a dude and now she's a girl? -M

The boogeyman wants to suck you're toes. -M He would never, he's asexual. -P

We need a new toilet. -P This is American made! This is a quality toilet! -A

There's no one as Irish as Barack Obama. -N

She called me autistic! -P Well, it couldn't hurt to get tested. -A

The shirt says 'wicked strong' -M It should say 'wicked annoying' -N

What bitch is blowing up your phone? -M Literally your Dad. -N

I'm a white girl, of course I love cheese. -S

Why do bad things keep happening to me? Don't they know who I am! -N

It's because I feel safe here. -M Well, maybe you shouldn't. -N

The real magic happens when you embrace the delusion. -K

Oh look, the Trump tower! What if it just blows up? -R

I'm gonna be honest, I didn't finish the Bible. It's on my DNF shelf. Adam and Eve? I need enemies to lovers. -B

A woman bit me, I'm gonna become a prostitute. No! -S

Technically, I'm bisexual. -M You're too old for labels. -G

[jessielefey]

I love you topical song lyrics as fic and/or chapter titles

I love you songfics that are half pre-existing lyrics in italics

I love you meandering plots that don't know what needs to stay and what's okay to go so they end up sounding as much like some chimera of diary entries and stream of consciousness as a story

I love you chapters that just end because the author hit the word goal

I love you five hundred chapter fics that span decades because the author keeps finding new Situations to put those poor boys(gender inclusive) in

I love you author asides to the audience mid-scene about how silly the fic is or how they just don't feel like writing this part and are skipping it or to have an argument with the character about the plot. I love you fics that just shrug and go "I don't know Japan, so this is all wrong, but you're probably an American too reader so shut up."

I love you blatant callouts of canon's flaws and plots scripted out of spite to prove how this potential concept *should've* been done

I love you awkward smut. I love you awkward lack of smut. I love you bashfully smashing barbies together before the author confesses they're ace and don't really get it. I love you author that understands it way too well and is having so much fun servicing exclusively themself

I love you ashamed author notes about how the chapter didn't come together the way they wanted on some of the best writing I ever seen in my life. I love you ashamed author notes where the author is entirely correct on their lack of skill and I love those fics too.

I love you spelling/grammar mistakes that let you know why the person is having trouble with english. I love you fics by dyslexics who are pushing through and writing anyway. I love you typoes that touchscreens tend to cause and typoes physical keyboards tend to cause and typoes speech-to-text ais tend to make. I love you six page chapters with only two paragraph breaks and three periods. I love you comma chains and semi-colon abuse and allergies to the shift key.

I love you No Beta We Die Like <Noteable Character Death>. I love you best No Beta We Die Like My Respect For Canon.

I love you in-universe typoes the characters do as a form of character expression. I love you phonetically correct misspellings to show accents. I love you things that seem like mistakes but are actually dialects or english-adjacent languages.

I love you mistranslated idioms and inconsistent pronouns because the author's native language doesn't gender pronouns and other weird quirks of grammar that give away an author's mothertongue. I love you for writing it in english or at all anyway even though it's embarassing and people can be mean.

I love you fics that include sign language references. I love you fics where the author knows the sign language; I love you fics where the author is semi-educated on the language but sorta fumbles showing it; I love you fics where the author doesn't even try and just goes "the characters know, fill in the blanks yourself if you're so smart."

I love you ten chapter fic that last updated in 2019. I love you 68/70 chapter fic that will never finish.

I love you cringe self-insert OC; I hope they gave the author what they needed when they write themselves into the story

I love you folktales. I love you stealing back characters from Official Canon. I love you OOC.

I love you AO3. I love you tumblr. I love you wattpad. (I never loved you fanfiction.net :-p but I don't hold it against your authorbase who I love very much.)

I loved you livejournal and geocities and angelfire and old shipping websites on someone's parent's work server only accessible through webrings. I loved you so much usenet rpg, even if I cannot love discord.

I love you. I love you *for* everything you're ashamed of. I don't think you should be ashamed for any of it, but I love your ambition to improve. Please let it improve you not silence you, okay?

I. Love. You.

[h3rmess]

what did u think of le serrafim's new come back :p i think it was pretty good smart is my favorite song on the album

YES I CAN FINALLY REVEAL MY OTHER SIDE MWAHAHAHAHA 😈😈😈

I've been a kpop stan since November 2019 got into it because of blackpink but I was UTTERLY OBSESSED with bts.

then I got into txt and lots of other groups and then le sserafim rolled around and I love them so so so much

as always my girls devoured the mv ATE !! I actually don't have a bias but if I had to choose I'd probably say yunjin bc she's such a babe 😍

IM NOT SURE WHAT MY FAV SONG IS YET ALL OG THEM ARE SO GOOD!!

[fiannalover]

bweirdoctober Day 14 - Inspiration

Alright. Let's talk about Medea.

Medeia is, very obviously, named after Medea. It is the latter's Portuguese name, even. There are 3 topics in particular behind this naming reason: Death, Dualities and Knowledge.

1. Medea is a common representation of "Death as freedom". In killing her children, she freed them from slavery, something which a lot of modern retellings of the story heavily emphasize. Medeia is not. Having kids, but the whole death thematic fits heavily with the story and her "Memento Mori" approach to life.

2. Medea is often written in contrasts. The "savage" foreigner to the noble Greek, the ancient divine to the modern human, the- well, I'll say more later. Medeia, too, is in a borderline. To be human, but use magic is in an ambiguous fine line in relation to magical creatures like werewolves and vampires, one that has swung back and forth in setting. Design wise, this is reflected too, with the idea being that she is a white/passing Latina, both of these contrasting other characters she interacts with.

3. Knowledge. We all know Medea as the uber powerful magic sorceress, but like. Yes, she is that. But also. Arguably, more importance is put on how smart she is. Medea is a pharmakon healer, with knowledge of potions and medicine alike she repeatedly uses. You could argue this is what is valued about her, more than her magic by itself.

And that is why I stuck with Medeia for my characters name. Even with magic as limited to its basics, she still carries an endless repertoire of knowledge few on the setting match. She's as focused on the core skill of Medea as can be.

Edit: Some sources for Medea talking

BORGES, Patrícia Andréa. Medeias de Eurípides e Pasolini. Portal Universo ao Meu Redor. Published in 2019. https://universoaomeuredorblog.wordpress.com/2019/05/17/medeias-de-euripides-e-pasolini/.

CAIRUS, Henrique. Medéia e seus contrários. Revista de Letras, Universidade Federal do Ceará, vol. 1/2, p. 9-11, jan/dez. 2005. http://www.revistadeletras.ufc.br/rl27Art02.pdf

MILLER, Benjamin. DONKIN, Hallie. Somehow it’s About All of Us: Black Medea’s White Taboo”. Philament 7 (2005): 1-6. (Idk man throw it on LibGen or internet archive the source site crashed)

[films-on-a-plane]

to be watched list (series)

# $#*! My Dad Says (2010–2011) 2 Broke Girls (2011-2017) 3rd Rock from the Sun (1996-2001) 6Teen (2004-2010) 8 Simple Rules… for Dating My Teenage Daughter (2002-2005) 13 Reasons Why (2017-2020) 30 Rock (2006–2013) 101 Dalmatians: The Series (1997-1998)

A According to Jim (2001-2009) Adventure Time (2010-2018) Aladdin (1994-1995) Ally McBeal (1997-2002) American Dragon: Jake Long (2005-2007) Anger Management (2012-2014) Archer (2009-2023) As Told by Ginger (2000-2009) Atypical (2017-2021) Austin & Ally (2011-2016) Avatar: The Last Airbender (2005-2008) Awkward. (2011-2016)

B Batman: The Animated Series (1992–1995) Black-ish (2014-2022) Blockbuster (2022) Bluey (2018-) Bob's Burgers (2011-) BoJack Horseman (2014–2020) Boy Meets World (1993-2000) Braceface (2001-2006) Brandy & Mr. Whiskers (2004-2007) Broad City (2014-2019) Brooklyn Nine-Nine (2013-2021) Buffy the Vampire Slayer (1997-2003)

C CatDog (1998-2005) Charmed (1998-2006) Community (2009-2015) Cougar Town (2009-2015) Coupling (2000-2004)

D Daria (1997-2002) Dead Like Me (2003-2004) Derry Girls (2018-2022) Disenchantment (2018-2023) Doctor Who (2005-) Don't Trust the B---- in Apartment 23 (2012-2013) Drake & Josh (2004-2007)

E Ellen (1994-1998) Emily in Paris (2020-) Everybody Hates Chris (2005-2009) Everybody Loves Raymond (1996-2005) Everything Sucks! (2018)

F Family Guy (1999– ) Fillmore! (2002-2004) Fleabag (2016-2019) Frasier (1993-2004) Freaks and Geeks (1999–2000) Fresh Off the Boat (2015–2020) Full House (1987-1995) Futurama (1999-)

G Game of Thrones (2011-2019) Gilmore Girls (2000-2007) Ginny & Georgia (2021-) Girl Meets World (2014-2017) Go On (2012-2013) Good Luck, Charlie (2010-2014) Gossip Girl (2007-2012) Gravity Falls (2012-2016) Grim & Evil (2001-2007)

H Hacks (2021-) Hannah Montana (2006-2011) Hercules (1998-1999) House (2004–2012) Home Economics (2021-2023) Home Improvement (1991-1999) Hot in Cleveland (2010-2015) How I Met Your Mother (2005–2014) How to Sell Drugs Online (Fast) (2019-)

I I Am Not Okay with This (2020) iCarly (2007-2012) I Love Lucy (1951-1957) Inside Job (2021–2022) It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia (2005-)

J Joey (2004–2006)

K K.C. Undercover (2015-2018) Kevin Can Wait (2016-2018) Killing Eve (2018-2022) Kim Possible (2002-2007) King of the Hill (1997-2010)

L Liv and Maddie (2013-2017) Lilo & Stitch: The Series (2003-2006) Lizzie McGuire (2001-2004) Louie (2010-2015)

M Mad About You (1992-2019) Magnum, P.I. (1980-1988) Malcolm in the Middle (2000-2006) Man vs. Bee (2022) Man with a Plan (2016-220) Maude (1972-1978) Melissa & Joey (2010-2015) Mike & Molly (2010-2016) Modern Family (2009-2020) Monk (2002–2009) Mr. Bean (1990-1995) Mr. Bean (2002-2019) Mr. Sunshine (2011-2012) My Name Is Earl (2005-2009)

N New Girl (2011-2018) Not Dead Yet (2023-)

O Once Upon a Time (2011-2018)

P Parks & Recreation (2009–2015) Party Down (2009-) Pepper Ann (1997-2000) Popeye the Sailor (1960-1962) Pretty Little Liars (2010-2017) Pretty Smart (2021)

Q

R Recess (1997-2001) Regular Show (2010-2017) Rick and Morty (2013–) Rules of Engagement (2007-2013) Russian Doll (2019-)

S Sabrina: The Animated Series (1999-2000) Sabrina, the Teenage Witch (1996-2003) Sam & Cat (2013-2014) Saved by the Bell (1989-1992) Schitt's Creek (2015-2020) Scooby Doo, Where Are You! (1969-1978) Sean Saves the World (2013-2014) Sex and the City (1998-2004) Seinfeld (1989-1998) Shake It Up (2010-2013) Shameless (2011-2021) Silicon Valley (2014-2019) Single Parents (2018-2020) Skins (2007–2013) So Help Me Todd (2022-) Space Force (2020-2022) Speechless (2016-2019) SpongeBob SquarePants (1999-) Squid Game (2021-) Stranger Things (2016-2025) Studio 60 on the Sunset Strip (2006-2007) Suburgatory (2011-2014) Superior Donuts (2017-2018) Superstore (2015-2021)

T That '70s Show (1998-2006) That '90s Show (2023-) That's So Raven (2003-2007) The Brady Binch (1969-1974) The Crew (2021) The Ellen Show (2001-2002) The Emperor's New School (2006-2008) The End of the F***ing World (2017-2019) The Flight Attendant (2020-2022) The Fresh Prince of Bel-Air (1990-1996) The Golden Girls (1985-1992) The Golden Palace (1992-1993) The IT Crowd (2006-2013) The King of Queens (1998-2007) The Last Dance (2020) The Legend of Tarzan (2001-2003) The Little Mermaid (1992-1994) The Loud House (2014-) The Neighborhood (2018-) The New Adventures of Old Christine (2006-2023) The New Adventures of Winnie the Pooh (1988-1991) The Odd Couple (2015-2017) The Office UK (2001-2003) The Pink Panther Show (1969-1970) The Powerpuff Girls (1998-2004) The Replacements (2006-2022) The Suite Life on Deck (2008-2011) The Suite Life of Zack & Cody (2005-2008) The Twilight Zone (1959–1964) The Umbrella Academy (2019-2024) The Upshaws (2021-) The White Lotus (2021-2025) The Woman in the House Across the Street from the Girl in the Window (2022) Timon & Pumbaa (1995-1999) Tiny Beautiful Things (2023) Totally Spies! (2001-2014) Twin Peaks (1990-1991)

U Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt (2015-2020) Unstable (2023-)

V Veep (2012-2019)

W Web Therapy (2011-2015) Welcome Back, Kotter (1975-1979) Wednesday (2022-) What I Like About You (2002-2006) Whitney (2011–2013) Will & Grace (1998-2020) W.I.T.C.H. (2004-2006) Wizards of Waverly Place (2007-2012)

X Xena: Warrior Princess (1995-2001)

Y Young & Hungry (2014-2018)

Z

[autorepairlebanontn]

Kia Soul Trunk Access Guide: 5 Easy Ways to Open Your Cargo Area

https://autorepairlebanontn.com/?p=3666 Kia Soul Trunk Access Guide: 5 Easy Ways to Open Your Cargo Area Struggling to open your Kia Soul’s trunk? You’re not alone! We’ve noticed this common question from many Soul owners who are looking for simple answers to access their cargo area efficiently. Whether you’ve just purchased your first Kia Soul or you’ve been driving one for years, understanding all the ways to open your trunk can save you time and frustration. From using your key fob to locating the hidden trunk release button, we’ll guide you through every method to access your Soul’s rear storage space without any hassle. Table of Contents Toggle Understanding the Kia Soul Trunk SystemHow to Open the Kia Soul Trunk From the OutsideUsing the Trunk Release Button on the Key FobUsing the External Trunk HandleOpening the Kia Soul Trunk From the InsideUsing the Interior Trunk Release LeverEmergency Trunk Release FeaturesTroubleshooting Common Kia Soul Trunk IssuesWhen the Trunk Won’t Open ElectronicallyDealing With a Frozen or Stuck TrunkKia Soul Trunk Maintenance TipsKey Fob MaintenanceButton WearEmergency Release MechanismRegular ChecksConclusionFrequently Asked QuestionsHow do I open the Kia Soul trunk using the key fob?Where is the hidden trunk release button located in a Kia Soul?Can I open my Kia Soul trunk manually if the electronic system fails?How much cargo space does the Kia Soul trunk provide?What should I do if my Kia Soul trunk is frozen shut?How do I maintain my Kia Soul’s trunk mechanism?Does the Kia Soul have a hands-free trunk opening feature?Is there an emergency trunk release inside the Kia Soul? Understanding the Kia Soul Trunk System The Kia Soul features a hatchback design rather than a traditional trunk, which sometimes causes confusion for new owners. This cargo area offers 24.2 cubic feet of space behind the rear seats, expanding to 62.1 cubic feet when the rear seats are folded down. Unlike conventional sedans, the Soul’s rear cargo area opens upward as a hatch, providing better access for loading and unloading larger items. The locking mechanism for the Kia Soul’s trunk utilizes an electronic system connected to the vehicle’s central locking. Most models come equipped with a latch on the lower portion of the hatch, covered by a small handle or decorative panel. In newer Soul models (2020 and later), Smart Key technology allows for hands-free trunk opening when the key fob is detected near the vehicle. Accessibility features vary between different model years and trim levels. Base models typically require manual operation, while higher trims offer power liftgate functionality with height adjustment settings. The 2019 and newer Kia Soul models include an emergency release lever inside the cargo area, allowing exit in case someone becomes trapped. All Soul models integrate the trunk release button into the key fob as a standard feature, providing remote opening capability from up to 30 feet away. How to Open the Kia Soul Trunk From the Outside Opening your Kia Soul’s trunk from the outside is straightforward with multiple options available. Here’s how to access your cargo area when you’re standing outside your vehicle. Using the Trunk Release Button on the Key Fob The key fob method offers the most convenient way to open your Kia Soul’s trunk from a distance. Simply press the trunk release button on your key fob, which typically displays an open trunk icon. This electronic command unlocks and opens the trunk automatically, giving you hands-free access to your cargo area. Your vehicle’s battery must be functioning properly for this feature to work correctly. Many Soul owners appreciate this method when approaching their vehicle with full hands or groceries. Using the External Trunk Handle The external trunk handle provides direct access when you’re standing at the rear of your vehicle. Locate the trunk release button positioned at the bottom center of the tailgate, marked with an open trunk icon for easy identification. Press this button firmly to release the trunk latch mechanism. Once released, lift the trunk lid upward to access your cargo space. This method works regardless of whether the vehicle is locked or unlocked in most modern Kia Soul models. If electronic methods aren’t functioning due to a dead battery or system malfunction, you can use the traditional key method as a backup. Insert your key into the trunk lock cylinder and turn it clockwise to manually disengage the locking mechanism. After turning the key, lift the trunk lid upward to access your storage area. Opening the Kia Soul Trunk From the Inside The Kia Soul offers convenient options for opening the trunk from inside the vehicle. These interior access methods ensure you can easily access your cargo area without stepping outside or using your key. Using the Interior Trunk Release Lever The interior trunk release button provides quick access to your Kia Soul’s cargo area while seated inside the vehicle. This button is typically located on the dashboard or directly on the tailgate and features an identifiable open trunk icon for easy recognition. Simply press this button once to release the trunk latch, then lift the hatch manually to fully access your storage space. This feature proves especially useful during rainy weather or when you’ve already settled into the driver’s seat but need to allow someone to load items into your trunk. Emergency Trunk Release Features Kia Soul models include a safety-focused emergency trunk release mechanism designed to prevent anyone from becoming trapped inside the cargo area. Located inside the trunk itself, this unlocking device is clearly marked with either “OPEN” or a directional arrow symbol (“⇒”). In an emergency situation, pushing the unlocking lever in the direction indicated by the arrow immediately releases the trunk latch. This critical safety feature provides peace of mind and complies with vehicle safety regulations that require all trunks to have interior release mechanisms. Troubleshooting Common Kia Soul Trunk Issues Even the most reliable vehicles occasionally experience trunk access problems. Here’s how to address common issues with your Kia Soul’s trunk to get you back on the road quickly. When the Trunk Won’t Open Electronically Electronic trunk release failures often have simple answers. First, check your key fob battery as a dead or weak battery prevents the trunk release signal from reaching your vehicle. A quick battery replacement typically resolves this issue. Clean any dirty or worn buttons on your key fob since debris or damage can interfere with proper functionality. Examine the interior trunk release button for similar wear or damage, as these buttons deteriorate over time with repeated use. Dealing With a Frozen or Stuck Trunk Cold weather and mechanical issues sometimes leave trunks uncooperative. Locate the manual release lever inside the trunk – it’s designed to glow in the dark and is marked with an ‘OPEN’ icon for easy identification in low light. Push this lever in the direction of the arrow to manually disengage the locking mechanism. Try the traditional key method by inserting your physical key into the trunk lock and turning it when electronic systems fail completely. Remove any obstructions or ice buildup around the trunk edges and latch mechanism, as these physical barriers commonly prevent proper operation during winter months. Kia Soul Trunk Maintenance Tips Regular maintenance ensures your Kia Soul’s trunk operates smoothly for years to come. Proper care prevents unexpected access issues and extends the life of your trunk mechanisms. Key Fob Maintenance Key fobs require regular battery checks to maintain reliable trunk access functionality. Replace depleted batteries promptly when you notice decreased range or inconsistent operation of the trunk release button. Most Kia Soul key fobs use CR2032 batteries that are easily replaceable with minimal tools. Keeping a spare battery on hand eliminates frustrating situations when you’re unable to access your cargo area electronically. Button Wear Trunk release buttons experience wear from frequent use, affecting their responsiveness over time. Inspect both the key fob and tailgate buttons periodically for signs of damage or decreased sensitivity. Worn buttons may require more pressure or multiple attempts to activate. Professional replacement of damaged buttons restores the convenience of quick trunk access and prevents potential security issues from malfunctioning locks. Emergency Release Mechanism The emergency trunk release lever serves as a critical safety feature in newer Kia Soul models. Check this mechanism during routine maintenance to confirm it’s accessible and operating correctly. The clearly marked lever (typically labeled “OPEN” or with an arrow symbol) should move freely when pushed in the direction indicated. This simple check provides peace of mind knowing anyone accidentally trapped inside can exit safely. Regular Checks Trunk hinges and latches benefit from periodic lubrication to maintain smooth operation. Apply a silicone-based lubricant to moving parts every 6-12 months, especially if you notice squeaking or stiffness when opening the trunk. Removing debris from the trunk seal prevents water leakage and potential electrical issues with the latch mechanism. These simple maintenance steps help avoid costly repairs and ensure reliable access to your Kia Soul’s cargo area whenever needed. Conclusion Getting into your Kia Soul’s trunk doesn’t have to be a frustrating experience. With multiple access methods available both inside and outside your vehicle you’ll never be left unable to reach your cargo area. Whether you prefer using the key fob button the external handle or the interior release lever your Soul offers convenient options for every situation. Remember that regular maintenance of your trunk components will ensure smooth operation for years to come. For those unexpected scenarios keep the manual override and emergency release functions in mind. These backup methods provide peace of mind when electronic systems fail. We hope this guide has solved your trunk access challenges and enhanced your overall Kia Soul ownership experience. Happy driving! Frequently Asked Questions How do I open the Kia Soul trunk using the key fob? Press the trunk release button on your key fob (typically marked with a trunk icon) for about 1-2 seconds. This will unlock and slightly open the trunk, allowing you to lift it the rest of the way. Make sure you’re within range of your vehicle (usually about 30 feet) and that your key fob battery isn’t depleted. Where is the hidden trunk release button located in a Kia Soul? The interior trunk release button is typically located on the lower left side of the driver’s dashboard or near the floor by the driver’s seat. It features a trunk icon for easy identification. Some models may have it integrated into the center console or near the steering column. Check your owner’s manual for the exact location in your specific model year. Can I open my Kia Soul trunk manually if the electronic system fails? Yes. Look for the key cylinder on your trunk (often hidden behind a small cover on the tailgate). Insert your physical key into this cylinder and turn it to manually unlock the trunk. Alternatively, fold down the rear seats from inside the vehicle to access the cargo area if you can’t open the trunk from outside. How much cargo space does the Kia Soul trunk provide? The Kia Soul offers 24.2 cubic feet of cargo space behind the rear seats. This expands significantly to 62.1 cubic feet when the rear seats are folded down, providing ample room for larger items. The boxy design of the Soul maximizes this space with a tall cargo area that accommodates bulky objects better than many competitors. What should I do if my Kia Soul trunk is frozen shut? Apply a commercial de-icer or warm water around the trunk seals and latch mechanism. Never use hot water as it may crack the glass. Gently press on the trunk while operating the release mechanism. For persistent ice, try using the manual key method while carefully applying pressure to break the ice seal around the edges. How do I maintain my Kia Soul’s trunk mechanism? Regularly clean and lubricate the trunk hinges and latch with silicone-based lubricant to prevent sticking. Replace your key fob battery every 1-2 years or when performance decreases. Check the emergency release mechanism periodically by pulling the handle inside the trunk. Clean the trunk weatherstripping to maintain a proper seal and prevent water intrusion that could damage the locking mechanism. Does the Kia Soul have a hands-free trunk opening feature? Yes, but only in newer models (2020 and later) equipped with Smart Key technology. This feature allows you to open the trunk hands-free by standing behind the vehicle with the key fob in your pocket or bag. Higher trim levels may include a power liftgate that can be programmed to open to a specific height for convenience in areas with low clearance. Is there an emergency trunk release inside the Kia Soul? Yes, 2019 and newer Kia Soul models feature an emergency release lever inside the trunk. This safety feature glows in the dark and allows anyone accidentally trapped inside to open the trunk from the inside. The lever is typically located near the latch mechanism and pulls downward to manually release the trunk. https://autorepairlebanontn.com/?p=3666 Absolute Auto Repair

[miguexter]

ABFLNOVW or any combination of those for the ask game :P

OL I'M DOING ALL OF THESE BLESS sorry if it's not coherent! Using these to distract myself! Ty claudie :3

A - Ships that you currently like a lot. (They don’t have to be OTPs because not everyone has OTPs.) Friendships, pairings, threesomes, etc. are allowed.

GOOD QUESTION I'm actually not big on ships in media like shows and stuff, normally i keep that for my own characters. But if i REALLY think about it. Crackle x The Troll (featuring ME because I need to make sure people know i am involved in every crackle ship i enjoy...) i also really like Preston and kyle from Manor of Terror which is a comic on here. PRESTONNN UJFFFG my angel. Also kyle x Michael !!!!!!

B - A pairing–platonic, romantic or sexual–that you initially didn’t consider, but someone changed your mind.

Hrmm. Chase and Shadowsan from CS. SORRYY I'm so autistic i only enjoy like 3 things. But yeah i was like that's so strange, then someone drew them super cute and I was like man...

I also enjoy Lundy and Deb from Dexter. They're strangely very cute and I got super freaking attached to them

F - What’s the longest you’ve ever been in a fandom?

Hrmm...MLP. it's been a constant since I was little. A lot of other stuff doesn't really stick. I guess also resident evil! Since 2019?

L - Say something genuinely nice about a character who isn’t one of your faves. (Characters you’re neutral about are fair game, as are characters you merely dislike. Characters that you absolutely loathe with the fire of ten thousand suns are exempt, as there is no point in giving yourself an aneurysm over a character that you hate.)

I can't even do this one well because my view is very black and white. I either like a character or want them killed. Uhm. I really fucking hate scott total drama and he's only good to me for ship content. But unfortunately he does have funny bits and I enjoy his character and laugh when he says stuff. I just need him killed

N - Name three things you wish you saw more or in your main fandom (or a fandom of choice).

Individual art of crackle that isn't just ships, I hate when he's reduced to being Carmen's childhood love or whatever. ;-;

That's actually generally true of most of my favs. They're boiled down to ships and hardly characterised well, like alejandro. He has tons of ships that suck or wouldn't work and have no thought other than YAOII !!! like pls.

I wish people had better takes lol 🩷 I am a nice person i promise but people just say the weirdest things or lamest headcanons like sorry uhm. Wow.

O - Choose a song at random. Which ship or character does it remind you of?

Pac man - Gorillaz ;; sorry it reminds me of Crackle uhm no surely not electricvinyl or powersurge (Troll x crackle) i am embarrassed

V - Which character do you relate to most?

..... Micheal Flores from MOT. He's very smart and socially awkward and he has autism in my heart (my boyfriend is just like kyle in my heart)

W - A trope which you are virtually certain to hate in any fandom.

Uhm straight relationships where there's no suffering or evil. Just like. Childhood friends to lovers like BORINGG make that woman evil . (I hate when the men are evil)