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yourhostsurendra · 5 years

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Perfection Valley Public Radio: Sharks! (YouTube Playlist)

“Today's top story comes to you despite our Sheriff's Department attempting to suppress it for unknown reasons. It appears our small town is being inundated with what can only be described as shark-filled tornadoes, or as my producer has suggested, "sharknadoes". We actually have photo evidence of it, and looking at it now, believe you me, it's quite shocking. We advise you attempt to seek shelter in your homes, preferably in your basements or bunkers if you have them until this calamity passes. Again, this is an urgent warning to seek shelter until the weather passes. We wish you the best of luck, stay safe out there.”

(I did a few in-character introductions to the songs and announcements under the cut to give a feel for the show, with excerpts of the radio show. The real show would obviously involve a lot more talking and theorising about conspiracies. I’ve also cut out a lot of what would just be repeating the message to take shelter.)

“Our first song today was requested by the lovely Brenda (@brendasangulalik), it’s a good pick, a personal favourite of mine..”

Hotel California Eagles

“Next up we have a request from Isiah that adds a little bit of insult to injury given the current climate —— to those who’ve just turned in our top story of today is that our town is being inundated with shark-filled tornadoes, our urgent advice is to seek shelter until an all-clear can be given —— but coming up next is a classic by REM..”

It's The End Of The World As We Know It (And I Feel Fine) REM

“Before requesting our next song, Margery Clarke would like us to remind all of you that her bake sale fundraiser on Sunday for our local school will be going ahead, provided that the current weather situation subsides. Next up is..”

Danger! High Voltage Electric Six

“Our next song was requested by Charlie (@charlietorres), a song I’m sure can relate to right now all around. Charlie gets it, they have an open mind. I hope to hear something from them about or discussion of the day later on. Our next song will be followed by another news segment, but for now we have..”

American Idiot Green Day

"Well that was certainly a lot for us to get through wasn’t it? Assuming we’re all heading to or currently sheltering somewhere we feel safe. We’ll be taking song requests and discussions of our discussion of the day ‘Crop Circles: is it aliens or people with a lot of time on their hands?’, please call in to let us know. The next song is a request by, my pabbi, Egill, who assures me this song has a ‘a more positive ending than last time’. I’m worried, but enjoy..”

The Elf-Knight Steeleye Span

“Well, Rowina that was certainly an interesting take on the matter, and it’s sure to have us all checking our bread bins —— should we have them —— before we go to bed in future, with a wonderful choice of song too, it’s Blondie..”

Heart Of Glass Blondie

"Thanks for your input Eddie (@eddietawhai), that certainly was an interesting perspective —— I think we all wish we had that much time on our hands —— but alas, this show doesn’t host itself. As promised, for Dorian, your favourite song..”

The Chain Fleetwood Mac

“I’m being told to remind parents that, due to severe weather conditions that schools in the area are closed. Parents are advised to keep their children inside to avoid the current severe weather conditions, which is warm temperatures and sharknadoes. Next up is a song requested by Blair (@blairsacevedo), we hope you enjoy it, Blair..”

I Wanna Be Adored The Stone Roses

“That was a lot of ideas coming very quickly Trueman, but we’re loving your energy so keep those calls coming. If we’re going to be invaded by aliens, which I would argue is quite likely to be sooner or later, it would indeed be interesting to see what would happen if it were sooner, as alien invaders would also have to deal with our current influx of deadly shark-filled tornadoes. However this assumes the government and the aliens are not, in fact, teaming up to conduct this experiment. Anyway, as requested, it’s Breaking the Law..”

Breaking the Law Judas Preist

"You certainly make some compelling arguments, Ariel, though I don’t know what would happen if we had to deal with the weather we’re dealing with right now as well as the weather in your request..”

Purple Rain Prince

“What a call to end on, Saffron, some fantastic ideas there. That’s it for our discussion of the day, tune in tomorrow for something else to ponder, but today’s discussion has certainly given us a lot to think about —— and plenty of bread bins to search —— thanks for your call, Saffron and here’s your song..”

Don't Look Back In Anger Oasis

“Our next request is by Benji (@benjaminandrewssyfy), a very relevant message for our current weather situation, which is —— if you’re just tuning in —— warm temperatures as well as frequent and deadly sharknadoes. Residents near Walter Chang’s Market are advised to attempt to seek any shelter they can as there has been a sighting nearby. Please keep safe out there. For now we have take shelter, friends with..”

Take Shelter Years & Years

“Thank you, Gladys, that sounds like a fantastic idea for Margery Clarke's bake sale fundraiser on Sunday. I’ll be sure to try some of your tiramisu on Sunday should the government see fit to end this horrifying weather experiment by then. I hope you enjoy your song..”

Summer Wine Nancy Sinatra & Lee Hazlewood

“Sounds Larkin’s got his bunker all decked out, we envy you, buddy, I like to think my own shelter has a very homey vibe, it’s of course designed for safety first but you can’t underestimate that feeling of warmth. I’m sure you’d usually have people lining up the streets to join you, however I certainly wouldn’t recommend that in this weather. Anyway, up next Larkin’s requested..”

I Can't Decide Scissor Sisters (*would be censored)

“Thanks, Vidya, for your kind words of optimism and encouragement, I’m sure we can all use them even if it’s hard to take heed of them. Keeping up with those positive thoughts she’s asked for MIKA with..”

Relax, Take It Easy MIKA

"Next up we have a song request from Bobbie about a place whose name reminds me of our lovely —— if currently shark-infested —— little town. First, though, is an important warning for anyone near the Desert Inn to make sure they have shelter as soon as possible as Tanner has warned that a wobbegong whirlwind is heading that way, keep yourselves our of harm’s way, folks..”

Pleasant Valley Sunday The Monkees

"Next up Marina’s requested a favourite of mine, a fitting song for our strange little town. This next song will be followed by a repeat our local news segment. Of course, our top story is still the bizarre shark-infested tornadoes that are surrounding and terrorising our town. But next up is ELO with..”

Strange Magic Electric Light Orchestra

“Now that’s over I can’t remind everyone enough to keep as sheltered as possible until the government sees fit to end this experiment. Whether that’s inside your homes or one of our local businesses. Stay safe out there. Next up, it’s on the nose, it’s ‘The End of the World’..”

The End of the World Skeeter Davis

#syfy.task #playlist #Perfection Valley Public Radio #syfy.task.003

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artificialqueens · 7 years

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Crossing pt. I (Katlaska) - sebald

A/N: [4574 words] Sex is sex. The rest is just noise.

The fat dick lies limp in Justin’s hands, and a small part of him wants to cry at how utterly pathetic his sex life has become.

It's a sad sight, reminding him vaguely of the first time he’d tried to cook sausages in college. Having been completely unblessed with any culinary skill or instinct, and being deathly afraid of burning their mousehole of an apartment down, he had taken the sausages out after a minute in the pan. His roommate had thrown one at him after a bite, complaining that it was cold as a dead man’s cock inside.

He’d rather cold sausage than a hopelessly limp dick, but Justin tries not to look disappointed. Limp dick is still better than no dick, he convinces himself. And anyway, he’s a fairly polite person. He even pretends to ignore Clark's showboating moan when he finally begins half-heartedly sucking at the tip.

He wishes he’d turned the TV on. He could be watching Keeping Up with the Kardashians right now. The human turd that is Scott Disick would excite him more than this frankly insulting cock.

Justin can’t complain too much. He gets it. If he ever ended up naked in a hotel room with an equally naked Bette White, his dick would probably shrink down to the size of a tic-tac, if not just fall off and scamper away under the bed. It wouldn’t be because she’s a woman, but because she’s Bette Fucking White, and it would be more surreal than the one time he and Brian played Street Fighter II after sharing a tray of edibles. Point being, it would be overwhelming. Of course, Justin would never actually dare invite Bette to bed–not because he’s gay and about six decades younger than her, but because he’s smart and considerate enough to know that he wouldn’t be able to deliver where it counts. Unfortunately, the carousel of men he’s had in his carousel of hotel rooms have not been as smart or considerate. About 70 percent of Justin’s sex life these days consist of an impressive number of men with very unimpressive dicks. He wouldn’t even really mind if they were race chasers, he just wanted an erect fucking dick, goddammit.

Clark keeps groaning and moaning above him, putting on a full show, but his dick is still only barely upright. Justin is both appreciative and annoyed. He pulls off the salty tip and proceeds to lick long stripes right down to the balls, but Clark, apparently determined to cross the line between embarrassing and infuriating, suddenly grabs Justin’s head with his clammy hands and starts grinding his nuts on Justin’s face, slobbering out an unconvincing growl that sounds straight out of a budget porno on the “rough gay” tag on Pornhub.

Christ. Justin pushes away from him. “Easy, cowboy.”

For his part, Clark has the decency to look apologetic, even putting his large hands up like he’d just been served a warrant. “Sorry, Lasky.”

“Justin, please,” he reminds firmly, getting up from the bed and walking to the fridge. He always makes it a point to introduce himself as Justin, hoping it would help separate him from the whole TV persona, but it doesn’t always work. He pulls two bottles of water out and tosses one to Clark.

“Right. Justin. Sorry,” he says. He catches the bottle and thankfully seems to realize the implicit signal that comes along with it. “Guess that’s it for tonight, huh?”

We should be asking your malfunctioning penis that, he wants to say, but he told himself he’d be nice. “It’s getting late anyway. Early flight tomorrow. Sorry.”

“No biggie.“ Clark shrugs magnanimously, as if he’s the slighted party who’s willing to overlook Justin’s sexual incapacity. Completely unacceptable! Justin is a champion cocksucker. Even his drag is inferior to his cocksucking prowess.

Smiling stiffly, Justin bids Clark a firm goodbye. "Should I call front desk to get you a cab?”

Heeding his signal, Clark declines and says he’ll grab himself an Uber. In three minutes flat, he's dressed up and making his way out, wisely choosing not to say anything more than a “Have a good night.”

Justin washes his face and brushes his teeth, resigning himself to another night alone with his own hand. It’s not as if he’s addicted to sex or anything like that. Once or twice every few weeks–months, even–is enough to get him by. The rest of his days he’s quite content doing it all by himself. It’s more the warmth that he misses, and the Mobius strip of receiving pleasure from giving pleasure and so on. He’s not actively looking to land himself a boyfriend either. There are perks to living the prime of his life as a single gay man. Sure, he gets a lot of disappointing race chasers, but he’s also had his fair share of mind-blowing sex. So he’s far from unhappy.

Still, it’s hard not to feel so alone at times.

He blames hotel rooms. They’re not conducive to happiness, not with the way their bareness announces impermanence. He knocks down his shaving cream and deodorant sitting on the counter, seeing if the slight mess would take away from how sparse and clean and impersonal the whole set-up is. It doesn’t.

Collapsing into bed, he picks his phone up, intending to pull up the ever-reliable 50-Load Weekend and get his erection over with. He's welcomed instead with one message from Willam (“Bitch I took more trade dick today than Brent Corrigan ever did in his entire twinkfant life”) and a string of texts from Brian–six consecutive messages only saying “!!!” and a seventh one saying “Joanne!!!!”

He hits Brian back with an “?”, congratulates Willam on his success, and goes back to his search for porn. But just as he makes it to his porn folder, his phone pings with another message. Jesus must not want him to jack off today.

Brian: Forgive me mawma for I have sinned.

Justin: Elaborate?

Brian: I’m sorry I sound like I’m joking but I’m really serious. Please don’t hate me.

Justin: I already hate you. What do you want?

Brian: I want love. Tonight I wanted it in the form of a threesome. Which I might have jokingly suggested to Sharon and Chad. And which they might not have taken so jokingly. Which might have led to an actual threesome.

Justin raises a brow. It’s a thought he’s entertained in the past, being in a threesome with those two. For all their troubles, Aaron had always been good in bed, and Justin has the distinct feeling that Chad might enjoy railing him out of spite. But the waters are too complicated to tread for it to be worth a go.

His phone rings with a call before he can think up a reply. “Hello Miss Minaj,” he greets.

“Hey.” Brian’s voice is subdued. “I’m sorry. Are you mad?”

“Girl, no.”

“You have every right to be.”

“Honestly, Brian, it’s totally fine. Fuck all my exes. Literally. They’re all good lays.” He cackles a little. “So how was it?”

Brian hesitates. “It was okay.”

“I’ve slept with Sharon. There’s no way it was just okay,” he chides. “In fact she’d be offended at that tepid description and might never talk to you again. Spill.”

He can hear Brian relaxing on the other end. “Well, if you insist. Sharon was a mouthful, but Chad basically drilled a hole right through my pharynx and out the back of my head.”

“Bigger than Sharon? No way.”

“Oh, all the way, mawma.”

Justin whistles.

“Catch this though–I thought they might have wanted to get all up in my ass or something, because they give off that creepy domineering Dracula tandem vibe, right? But, twist of twists, we ended up spitroasting Chad.”

“Huh. That fucks up my threesome fantasies with them.”

“You have threesome fantasies with them?”

“Of course. Congratulations on living my dream.”

“Eh, it was just all right. It was hot in theory, but they were both way too into each other for it to be anything remarkable on my end. I felt more like a volunteer called up to stage by a magician. Like I was there participating, but it was a kinda detached, voyeuristic participation, and I wasn’t in on the magician’s secret. And in this case there were two magicians, and them chuckling at things I didn’t understand and sending sticky glances to each other the whole night was kind of a boner killer.”

Justin shrugs off the slight sting he feels to hunger. He hasn’t had a proper dinner, has he? Yes, that’s what it is. “Well, that’s better than flaccid trade, girl.”

Brian lets out a whoosh of air in sympathy. “Sorry. Tonight?”

“Yep. Some budget John Stamos dude I picked up at Flaming Saddles.”

“Chaser? Or just another lonely stranger?”

“Chaser, definitely. Bought me a drink to congratulate me on All Stars, and then kept calling me Alaska after I’d insisted he call me Justin thrice. But he looked kinda hot and the last I got laid was like a month ago, so I took a chance.”

“And?”

“And nothing. Limp dick. Rubbed his nuts on my face like I’m a fucking towel. It was hopeless. I more or less kicked him out.”

“You didn’t come?”

“Nope.” He toys with his dick. It’s dead weight in his hand now, his erection having died down. “Maybe later. I’ll think of your threesome. But maybe with me in Chad’s place.”

“That already sounds hotter than how it really went. Think Sharon will be up for it?”

“Sharon, maybe. But Chad would only consent to it if you and Sharon were fucking my rotting corpse.”

“Now there’s a hot image. My dick’s getting stiff again.”

Justin laughs. “Fuck off.”

“I should fuck off now, actually. I realize that it’s three o'clock,” he concedes. “Brenda just wouldn’t let me go to sleep without telling you.”

“Well, tell Brenda she doesn’t get to impinge on my sleep schedule either.”

Brian cackles. “Like you were sleeping. Fifty bucks says you were rubbing it out to Dawson.”

“Ding ding ding, we have a winner,” he says, while unsuccessfully suppressing a yawn. “Unfortunately it’s not my dead erection.”

“Shall I talk you through? My university guidance counselor told me I could be the most successful phone sex operator in Boston if I put all my time and effort into it.”

“I dunno, you sound like a dying grandfather at your sexiest. Talk me to sleep like my Grandpa Joe used to, though. I’d appreciate it more.”

Brian wheezes, and Justin smiles sleepily.

“You’re a fucking cuntwhore, you know that? But actually, yes, I do have a story to torture you with.”

“Thrilling.”

“Shut up. So yesterday I arrived in Pittsburgh, and Lola was supposed to pick me up, but of course she overslept—”

“Or pretended to have overslept. I have a text from her saying her ex came by yesterday morning with a very moving oral apology.”

“That bitch. Well anyway she left me sitting in the airport feeling like Joan Crawford, except I didn’t even have a Mamacita to keep me company. So I sit next to this old Asian lady knitting some pattern, and what do you know, it’s a fucking ‘Make America Great Again’ scarf. So I’m all confused right, because Trump hates immigrants and all, but I remembered what you said about not cutting ties with Trumpers and republicans, because that’s not gonna get us anywhere, right? So I very politely try to engage her in conversation, but she didn’t speak a lick of English—”

“Or was pretending not to,” he says through a yawn.

“Yes! Exactly my thought, so I persisted, asking her why she was making the scarf and even complimenting her on skill—which, I know shit about knitting, so she could probably tell that it was all bullshit. After a while, I think she got tired of me and she finally said, in very broken English, that she hated Americans like me, because she worked very hard to become a legal American citizen while I got born in this quote unquote great country, and now I’m wanting to open it up to the rest of the world all willy nilly, when I know absolutely nothing about immigrants. And then I kind of just shut up, because she’s right, I don’t know anything beyond broad liberal ideals, so even if she’s politically and morally in the wrong she’s still one up on the ladder of understanding the plight of immigrants more than my white ass ever can. But there’s got to be a middle ground, it can’t just be, I dunno, I’m white and she’s Asian, so I automatically lose the debate—it’s not even about a debate, I just want to understand. I left her alone because she wasn’t having any of my questions anymore, and—”

Justin grunts and hums in the appropriate pauses, still awake enough to make a mental note to tell Brian how he’d sorta patched things up with is republican aunt, but not awake enough to vocalize his thoughts. He picks up on flashes of Brian’s monologue, at one point talking about his sad airplane food, and much, much later, about how pretty Pittsburgh is and how he sees why Justin stayed there for as long as he did. Justin imagines that he was able to give an enthusiastic response to that, but perhaps he was dreaming it.

The next day, when he wakes up, he has three texts. One from his manager, sending him his flight details. One from Sharon, telling him of the threesome. And one from Brian, billing him for the cost of the call and for his professional service as a storytelling grandfather.

Justin: I'd pay you 10k via PayPal but I already donated to charity this year. How about a ten-dollar dinner when we’re both in LA? You can spill the threesome’s sordid details in your full breadth of expression.

Brian: Bump it up to $20 and call it date. I get home Saturday.

Justin: Me too. $18 and tip’s on you.

Brian: Fine. See you, snake lady <3

~~~

The only thing Brian loves more than his mother’s Christmas peppermint cookies is a warm, pert ass to cushion his face against as he dives in to explore new horizons with his searching tongue–as a respectful visitor, of course, and not an oppressive white colonizer staking his loveflag on unmarked territory. He has lost two seasons of Drag Race, but really, he’s still a winner, and his prize is a multitude of very willing bedmates across the globe. (Well, across the northwestern hemisphere anyway, and then confine that to only the major cosmopolitan centers. The neocolonial claws of American gay culture only extend so far.) With a mix of fascination and envy, he listens to Willam's detailed story of a threesome with two closeted Afro-Asian sportswear models in Tokyo, to Milk's vague allusions to a hookup with a local volunteer in Zambia, and to Justin's tragic retelling of how he sadly had to turn down a Filipino stripper offering to blow him in a club because his show was to start in five minutes. But Brian doesn’t allow himself to be too sad about the limits of his sexual map so far–it just means there’s more beautiful men for him to explore in the future.

Tonight’s ass is new to him, but the face and the place isn’t. He almost laughs into Justin’s asshole when Justin predictably whines for him to get in with his dick already. He ignores the pleas and slows down even more, spreading his cheeks further apart and rimming his entrance at a torturous pace.

“Fuck, Brian,” Justin pants, instinctively moving his ass away from oversensitivity, but Brian grips his hips and pulls him back. He can feel him quivering under his tongue. “Go fucking slower, by all means." Brian is impressed by how he manages to say it with enough sarcasm, even through his shaky breathing.

"Patience, you petulant child," he chastises, slapping Justin's ass lightly before moving his head up to trail his tongue along Justin's spine while finally pushing two fingers in. Justin actually mewls and shivers as his back dips in a concave, and Brian has never understood the perverse allure of bestiality, but he almost comes right then.

"I’m so open, fuck. Please," Justin pleads, his arms going out under him, his body now forming a steep slope, ass at the apex. Brian marvels for a moment about what a long and endless stretch of a human being Justin is before finally deciding to take mercy on the poor, shaking boy—and on himself, really, as he feels about ready to come untouched just from the sight and sensation of Justin’s hole crudely clamping around his fingers.

"All right, since you asked so nicely,” Brian says playfully. He gently retracts his hand and drops a kiss on top of Justin's almost concerningly prominent tailbone before tumbling down from the couch. He twists himself over to reach for his discarded jeans under Justin's messy coffee table, burdened by their empty pizza box—fancy veggie pizza from a fancy trend-cashing hipster place down the street actually, and Justin paid the tip before Brian could take out his wallet. Justin threw a water bottle at his head when he started chiding him for the overpriced pizza choice.

“Oh my god.” Justin huffs at the pause in action and collapses down onto the couch, turning sideways to watch impatiently as Brian fishes through his pockets for his wallet. He starts stroking himself, the insatiable whore. While it’s a stunning visual that Brian stores away in his mental porn archive, right under “Video: Chubby Bear Takes Hit From Bong Dildo Lodged Up Hipster Twink’s Ass," he tuts and bats the hand away with a stern look.

"No. You’d come way too early and embarrass us both.”

“At the rate you’re going, neither of us are ever going to come,” Justin grumbles, but he keeps his hands away. "Edging is purgatory. I’d like the sweet release of paradise someday.“

Brian grins and goes back to his wallet, but there is only a Chipotle receipt in the spot where his condoms usually are. He looks up at Justin sheepishly. "Bad news, Dante. I’m out. Where do you keep yours?”

“Oooh. The lady is a traaaamp,” Justin sings teasingly, pulling his plastic lips back in a parody of a sensual smile. “Bedroom. Nightstand drawer. You get it, I’m not standing up.”

“Aye, aye, cap'n,” Brian says with a salute. He gets to his feet and begins walking out of the living room. "Hurry up!“ Justin calls after him, and Brian looks over his shoulder and grins wickedly as he slows down. He gets a pillow thrown at him for his efforts, and he cackles and speeds up to avoid it.

He’s only been inside Justin’s room once, and very briefly at that, when he and Courtney crashed Justin's apartment after a gig together in downtown LA. Courtney was wasted beyond help, and Justin’s place was close by, so Brian rang him at three in the morning and asked if Courtney could rest his pretty little Australian bird wings for the night. Justin waited for them at his steps, and together the two of them hauled Courtney from the Lyft to the bedroom. There was really only room for two people on the bed, so Brian bid them goodnight and faceplanted on the couch for eleven hours straight.

Justin’s room is a drag dump. Brian wades through piles of shimmering fabric and spiky heels before reaching the bedside drawer, which is surprisingly organized. There’s a basket of condoms, a bottle of lube, three black pens, and two notebooks. Nosily, he peeks into the notebook on top, and he’s met with sketch after beautiful sketch of cartoonish women–or woman, perhaps, as they seem to be varied iterations of Alaska, all big-haired and possessing of that unearthly hourglass figure. While the features are constant, their expressions run the gamut of human emotion. Some are, predictably, fierce and modelesque. Others are bright and toothy-smiled. Others are in tearful telenovela hysterics. Others still are grotesquely furious, only heightened by Alaska’s already excessively arched brows.

The one that stands out the most to Brian is the one where she’s expressionless, depthless. It’s the same size, same features, same ink, applied with the same weight as all the other sketches, but it seems smaller, less present somehow. Blank. It’s unsettling.

Brian doesn’t go farther than that, pushing the drawer shut and making his way back to Justin.

"How generous of you to remember that I’m sitting here, ass loose and buck-ass naked,” he quips. He’s got his long legs crossed and hanging off the arm of the couch, his Mae West smile a bawdy intrusion upon the grace of his equine features. All thoughts of the sketches evaporate from Brian's mind at the ridiculous sight.

“Your room is messier than the group-on dressing rooms we had at BOTS.” He massages Justin’s rim and then prompts him to turn over and drape himself over the arm of the couch. He gamely obliges. “Let’s pray your anal cavity isn’t half as bad.”

“Don’t worry, I douched. I thought I might meet someone at The Abbey tonight.”

Brian rubs the tip of his condom-clad dick around Justin’s entrance, and Justin’s back muscles melt at the gesture. “Hm. Too bad you’re stuck with me.”

“Yeah,” he breathes out, only barely. “You’re fucking terrible.” Brian pushes in then, reducing Justin to a surprised moan.

Justin relaxes quickly, opening up to his thrusts and receiving them with abandon, like he has faith in Brian and believes that he would give nothing but the best fucking that he could. Brian moves his hips in small circular motions, experimenting and trying to find that one spot that would send Justin keening. In the process, he has to grip the base of his cock to keep himself from coming before he finds Treasure Island. It’s difficult, with how tight and warm Justin is around him, not to mention the the way he’s running up and down the scale from deep grunts to breathy whimpers. It’s like every inch of Justin’s rectum—hell, his entire body—corresponds to a unique noise. It’s an impressive range Brian has discovered so far. If he fucks Justin long enough, he’s sure Justin can dethrone Mariah Carey.

They’ve spent too long sending each other into near-orgasm for this to really last a respectable amount of time, and soon Justin is a trembling mess beneath his equally trembling hands. He pulls out and stumbles down on the sofa, pulling the panting Justin over his lap and kissing his comedown away. Justin kisses back gamely, like he hadn’t just been fucked over to the next plane of existence.

Justin laughs into his mouth and then pulls away. He rests his head on Brian’s shoulder and talks to his neck. “I feel like a fucking teenager.”

“You come like a fucking teenager,” Brian confirms. He wipes Justin’s hair off his forehead, but Justin shakes his head like a dog and sends sweat flying toward Brian.

“Better that than your slow-ass grandpa thrusts.” He smirks. And then, as if to prove his agile youth, he jumps off Brian in one clean motion. It’s hardly an impressive feat, but Justin, who has all the grace of a fumbling fawn, looks mighty proud of himself. Brian smiles, until Justin offers a hand out. “Time for your bath, gramps.”

Brian kicks him but takes his hand. “Is this how you won All Stars? Gerontophilia?”

Justin taps the side of his head with a finger, like he’s passing on some wise secret. “Gotta know how to play the game.”

Brian nods as he gets up and lets Justin pull him to the bathroom. "I’ll keep it in mind for All Star 3: All-Star All Stars, where I duke it out with Raven for second place.“

"Oh my god.” Justin halts walking and buckles over in laughter, tears collecting in his eyes. Brian has to drag the dysfunctional Laughing Track of a human being to the bathroom and push him in the tub.

“You’re a handful,” Brian sighs as he settles in the tub as well, facing Justin.

“I’ve been told.” Justin reaches up behind him and gets the warm water going.

“Can it, Joanne. Not bigger than Chad.”

Justin shoots him an intrigued look. “Is he really?”

“Bigger? Yeah. Although size is immaterial for bottoms. And you’re a much better bottom.”

Justin preens and shakes his imaginary peacock feathers. "Thank you,“ he inflects in Tatianna’s voice. "Don’t tell Sharon, but I think you’re a better top.”

Brian laughs. “You whore. You’ll say anything to get dick up your ass.”

“Playing the game, I told you.” Justin shrugs. He swirls a finger in the two inches of water collecting around their feet. “Honestly though? I don’t care too much for it. Sometimes it’s more work than it’s worth.”

Brian cocks his head to the side. “You coulda skipped douching. I’ve never tried scat, but I’m open to new possibilities.”

“I’m surprised you haven’t,” Justin observes teasingly. He reaches behind him for a bar of soap and runs it through the water before sliding it across his legs. “I’ll keep it in mind next time.”

“Next time?” Brian asks, smirking. He reaches out to steal the soap for his own use. “I know you like this cock.”

“I’ve never prided myself on having good taste,” Justin retorts, sticking his tongue out. He kicks the bar of soap out of Brian’s grasp and into the water. Brian chuckles and picks it back up as Justin settles down and continues. “I was about ready to whore myself out downtown tonight. I never did get around to coming since that night you called me.”

“I actually was going to let Trixie set me up with a friend of her boyfriend for drinks after our little artisanal pizza dinner—” another kick, dangerously near his balls this time. Brian shields himself and continues, “but your skeletal system allure was too much to resist. I texted the guy and told him I had the runs.”

“You’re not being subtle about your scat fantasy, are you?”

“Well if there’s anyone I trust to make me see the merits of scat, it’s your filthy ass.”

“Okay, I’ve never done scat and have no particular desire to try.” He slides down and submerges himself in the water now that it’s filled up half the tub.

Brian’s surprised at how easy it had been for him and Justin to fall in bed together. Well, couch. One minute they were having a kiki over Sharon’s insane come control, the next Brian was demonstrating some random trade’s sloppy grandpa kisses on Justin’s mouth. And then it was the most sensible thing to start making out heatedly, until they were both naked and sucking each other off.

That’s three Ru girls down. Brian quite enjoys sleeping with them, he decides. No pressure, and no overwhelmed, limp dick. Maybe he’ll ask Trix and her boyfriend if they’re down for some three-way fun times next.

In the meantime, when Justin emerges from the water, Brian’s there to greet him with a soapy kiss.

#alaska thunderfuck #katya zamolodchikova #katlaska #smut #sebald #rpdr fanfiction #submission #canon compliant #crossing

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josephkitchen0 · 7 years

Text

50+ Surprising Chicken Nesting Box Ideas

New flock owners are always on the hunt for creative chicken nesting box ideas, so we asked our Backyard Poultry readers to share their suggestions, pictures, and advice! Take a look at these fun and original nesting boxes, upcycled from items around the house and farm or purchased on the cheap. Who knew you could get so much life out of Home Depot buckets, milk crates, kitty litter containers and even mailboxes! Plus, don’t miss these tips on the best bedding for chickens to make sure your bedding options are safe and comfortable.

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• BELOW: Our newest nest box … the girls love it. — Jennie Adeski Jones

• BELOW: Our nesting boxes, our small barn. �� Jodi Vaske

• BELOW: I use a nesting trough so no one fights over the same box … if there’s a favorite spot then they have the option of laying next to the current user if they can’t wait their turn. — Veronica Roberts

• Plastic potato bins. I stacked four of them. Have nine hens. They just use the bottom one. — Andrew Phillippi

• Milk crates. — Nick French

• BELOW: An old cupboard. — Fawn Stammen

• BELOW: Five-gallon buckets with a 2×4 across the bottom of the open end. — John Mueller

• BELOW: Plastic baskets. They’re so much easier to clean. — Julie Raine

• BELOW: Plastic Home Depot buckets. Hubby made a wooden stand and they slide in and out for cleaning. — Lisa Adams

• My husband and I use old plastic totes upside down with a hole cut in them so the can get in and out. — Heather Preston

• BELOW: I got this from a young couple that makes and sells them for extra cash. I am still looking for license plates to cover the rest of the top and sides, and curtains are next on my list. — Jennifer Shcaer Jackson

• They don’t use them. So basically an uncovered cubby, they all lay in the same cubby too. — James Vriana Beaulieu

• One coop I have 5-gallon buckets and we use straw/hay in them and the other coop we have dish pans with pine shavings in them. We made free-standing shelves with steep roofs so no one nest on/in them. — Jennifer Thompson

• Wood wine boxes. — Kelley Jane Kloub

• BELOW: We modified wooden crates, that are lined with a thick plastic mat and straw. The chicken love these boxes and often want to sleep in them. I had to put something over them because the chickens would roost on the sides and poop in them. But these have worked for well over a year. The burlap shades shake off easily and dry easily when sprayed off. — Amanda Currey

• I made boxes from plywood and use straw for bedding . — Mark Pieklik

• BELOW — Amey Walker McDow

• In our coop and outside hut we actually use a square shoe organizer cubby we bought at Menards. In the stalls, we have regular aluminum nest boxes. — Leah Mae Johnson

• Chick-N-Nesting boxes…they turn anything into a coop! — Danielle Sechler-Gunther

• BELOW: Old metal ones. — Sharleen Beth McGaw Hendrickson

• Metal 10-hole nesting boxes. — Lyndsay Grummet

• Dish pans. — Christine R. Hupper

• BELOW — Nancy Powell

• We have a single nest box that opens on the outside, and it is really wide, so three or more hens can use it at once, but no dividers. We found the hens would use the same ones anyway and didn’t want to waste hubbies time build a bunch if they just choose favorites and share anyway. — Ericca Colby

• BELOW: My son built my small coop as a birthday present! The nest box is plywood. — Becky Mishler

• BELOW: We built a custom three-tier box to fit a vintage window. It’s so nice to be able to see in to find the eggs. — Lori Jordan

• BELOW: Lots of Dengie chicken bedding. — Tine Ton

• I have wooden boxes built into a stall in the barn that are difficult to clean. They don’t drain so I put a plastic tub in each one with straw. Now when an egg breaks it doesn’t stick to the wood and make a mess. And it’s much easier now to change out the bedding. — Susan Everett

• BELOW: An old play kitchen. — Holly Matherne

• Store-bought wooden boxes and I use pine shaving for bedding. — Jenny Leslie

• BELOW — Christi Jones

BELOW: My bantam’s love this one. — Christi Jone

• BELOW: I built it into the coop. I have access to the two nests from the outside. I placed the eggs in the nests to get the ladies motivated. They are right at 22 weeks old so we should be getting eggs any day! — Scott Branch

• BELOW: Plastic crates with top flaps. — Kymberly White

• Milk crates. — Rodney Marical

• BELOW: These are built into the wall and accessible from the outside of the coop. — John Johnson

• BELOW— Mamahen Shaw

• 5-gallon buckets. Just lay them on their sides and prop up the front with a block of wood or a brick, works great! — Jacqueline Taylor Robson

• Boxes built onto the back of the coop. — Karla Redden

• Kids bookcases. — Mary Dorcey

• Dishpans from the dollar store. I sized the partitions to fit and keep a few cleaned and ready to go in. They also are removable from the outside via a hatch. — Mike Hilbig

• BELOW: They have space but lay in the same nest. — Ericca Colby

• BELOW — Carrie Miller

• BELOW — Kenan Tufekcic

• BELOW: Kitty litter hooded pan. Easy to clean. — Chris Carena

• BELOW: Baby changing table. — April Wilson Brown

• BELOW: I use the black plastic fruit and vegetable packing cases. Lots of room, though you wouldn’t believe it and very easy to scrub clean! — Eileen Thomas

• Old speaker boxes. — Janene Duffy

• I bought an 8 nest condo from Farm Tek. They love it. I also nail up milk crates they are great for perches. — Carolyn Ellis Niven

• BELOW: Homemade boxes. — Sandra Nevins Bailey

• BELOW — Carrie Isenhouer Cushman

• Boxes built onto the side of the coop that I can access easily. I put straw in them. — Courtney Crawford

• BELOW — Isabella O’Mahony

• BELOW: Milk crates with pine shaving. — Mike’s Misc Sales

• BELOW: We recycle and work was gonna throw this soda rack out! — Kristin Ransiear

• BELOW: The Booda … they can be relocated out of the coop so they don’t lay in the yard. And they can be sanitized if they get dirty. They wait in line and also share if they’re impatient. — Donna Nelson

• BELOW: Kitty litter buckets! — Tanya Pribyl Manthie

• BELOW — Tammie Beckner

• Old subwoofer box. — Chuck Sturm

• Artificial grass. — Sharron Lowe

• Tool bins. — William Poling

• Lawnmower catcher with wood shavings from hubby’s toy making. — Kia Ora Dawnie Angell

• We made eight boxes and they all use the same one. — Molly Scott

• We made boxes from plywood & 2x4s. We use pine shavings as that’s what they have preferred. I’ve tried straw and even horse bedding but they like pine shavings. — Carrie Domerchie

• BELOW — Krista Johnson

• BELOW: Wine boxes. — Siry Bromley

• Bucket — Jill Rogers

• BELOW — Kristen Cutlip

• BELOW: My newest rollaway nest boxes. — Julianne Seguin

• BELOW: I use cat litter containers. — Kristen Barton

• I built my chickens nest boxes, but they preferred laying in discarded sinks and old toilets that were dumped on the ranch I was cleaning up. — Kayla Chang

• Milk crates. — Tom Oates

• The bottom half of a cat carrier. — Brenda Givens

• BELOW: Wood shavings in a renovated dresser. Our first successful mama hen. — April Gardner

• Plastic cat litter buckets on their side with the larger part of the cover removed, leaving the smaller part to be a ‘stopper’ so the shavings don’t get kicked out as much. — Diane Allen

• BELOW: Old potting planters. — Angi Toth

• BELOW: They are plastic. My husband then screwed them into the wall and put a little board in front. The girls love them! I have 10 hens and they use all three every day. Well, one little diva lays on the floor right underneath but the rest use them daily.

• Dishpans from the dollar store lined with wood chips. — Vicki Campbell

• BELOW: My husband built this for me. — Liz Kinyk

• BELOW: They’re numbered because the fronts are removable for cleaning, and were made for each box (not interchangeable). Makes it easier for me. — Ruth Ann Clark

• BELOW — Tracy Joan Case

• I must be the only person here that does not like to enter the pen to collect eggs, mine are set up in such a way I collect externally. — JR Wallis

• BELOW: We used these bins from Lowe’s and screwed them through the bottom. Girls absolutely love them. — Elisabeth Nyenhuis

• Thrashed flax stalks filled 5-gallon buckets. I have a stack of milk crates I slide them into, or I just scatter them around the coop. — Kitsune Nyx

• BELOW: — Bonnie Williams

• Plastic lawnmower catchers. — Susan Glambert

• Beer boxes. — Andrew Sherman

• BELOW: 5-gallon bucks with holes drilled in the bottom so when I clean them the water can drain out. No curtains, that is just added work to keep clean. Simple is better. — Trish Haygood Hutchison

• BELOW — Jen Fletcher

• An old chest of drawers, drawers from an old refrigerator, and old car tires. — Joanne Russell

• BELOW: Old computer screens take out screen and wiring they love them. — Sue Jones

• BELOW: Home Depot buckets. — Beth Ann Henry Smith

• BELOW: Freebies from my son’s work. — Christine Cowling

• BELOW — Deloris Marie Bursott Mills

• BELOW: I found some old large mailboxes someone threw away and cut the backs out. I mounted them in the front wall of my coop so I can just open the mailbox door and reach right inside! — Marilyn Hill Baxter

• BELOW: Built from old wood and steel I found around our farm. — Andrew Weispfenning

• BELOW — I have used milk crates and wood boxes and 5-gallon buckets. — Penny Coffman

• If you do yard sales, old night stands can make a nest box, dressers too. I use old parrot cages as well. — Victoria Seaborn

• Wood wine boxes, they are wider. — Barbara Visocchi

• Bee boxes. — Angela Roberge

• Dishpan with pine shavings. — Linda Rice Carlton Abraham

• BELOW: Doghouse

• BELOW IKEA bookcases. — Amy Hendry Pistor

• BELOW: Kitty liter containers, very easy to take out and clean! — Kelli Sizenbach

• BELOW: This is solid wood. — Deborah Rogers

• Timber wine boxes. — Quentin Carter

50+ Surprising Chicken Nesting Box Ideas was originally posted by All About Chickens

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101flavoursofweird · 4 years

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Brenda deserves better.

I’ve talked about some of the other under-appreciated PL ladies like Katia, Janice/Melina and Marina. Now here’s Brenda.

In PL4, Brenda appears in a grand total of two cutscenes (with 0 voiced speaking lines), in a bonus episode and a few credit pictures. At first glance, her character profile doesn’t give us much insight into her personality either. She doesn’t get her own description in the PL4 character section of The World of Professor Layton, just a quick summary in Luke’s Family section. It’s easy to see why people don’t get immediately attached to her.

There are plenty of other female characters in PL4, even those who aren’t ‘reoccurring characters’, who leave a much bigger impression— Rosa, Emmy, Arianna, Loosha, Marylin, Wren (A lot of my personal favourites!)... Listing them all now, I’m just realising that it’s no wonder Brenda doesn’t stand out!

We first hear about Brenda when Layton asks Clark how she’s doing. Clark replies dismissively, ‘My wife is fine. She’s away. Family matters.’ Liam O'Brien doesn’t get enough credit for how well he plays Clark. Seriously, as much as he snaps at Luke, if you replay PL4 you can hear the anxiety hidden in Clark’s voice. He then quickly moves on to Luke. Layton says that he hasn’t seen Luke since he was a baby, which would suggest he hasn’t seen Brenda since then either.

Brenda enjoys travelling, as her character profile indicates, so her absence wouldn’t seem too suspicious at first for Layton. However, it’s the manner in which she left that’s odd. If you talk to Brenda’s NPC friend, Thomas, he’ll discuss Brenda’s departure with Luke. Brenda would usually chat about her travel plans with Thomas, but this time, she left without a word. Thomas wonders if there’s a reason for this. He notes that Brenda always loved family vacations, unless she and Clark were fighting... He could be referring to fights Brenda and Clark have had in the past, or to more recent fights during the spectre attacks. Brenda noticed how Clark was acting like a different person after Evan Barde’s death (something Luke also picks up on), so that might have led to some misunderstandings.

Luke thinks his mum left because she couldn’t deal with his dad anymore. (Or that Clark had even hidden Brenda away!) But she would never just leave without telling Luke.

Beth the maid notes that Clark has changed since Brenda left and she’s been hearing noises from the Tritons’ cellar.

As awful as it would be for anyone to be trapped in a dank cellar for months on end, it must have been especially awful for someone who loves travelling. And in their own house too! Sure, Angela got locked in a hotel room. Yeah, Flora was trapped in a barn. Bill Hawks got taken to Future London for like a week—no one cares. But at least they all got rescued fairly quickly. Much like Angela, Brenda had a hunch about the villain in her town... and she ended up getting imprisoned by Descole.

When Brenda and Doland escape from the cellar, Brenda’s first concern is Luke and Clark’s safety. Emmy asks if she’s OK, but Brenda doesn’t answer. She’s just shocked to hear that Luke is with the professor. Professor Who? Hershel Layton?! Again, this suggests Layton hasn’t seen Brenda for many years— since Luke was a baby.

In Layton’s bonus episode with Clark, Layton mentions how Clark and Brenda have always been close. Layton is the one to suggest that the Tritons should come back to London.

Sadly, we don’t get a conversation between Luke and Brenda, or Clark and Brenda, during PL4.

We do learn that Luke is protective of the bear his mum got him for his birthday. There’s also the heartbreaking bit about Luke calling out to his mum in his sleep while she was missing. But then, we get THIS precious picture from the PL4 credits:

Thankfully, we get more interactions with Brenda during Azran Legacy, and we get more of a feel for her personality. Luke spots his mum in Kensington High Street and wants to say hello to her with Aurora. Brenda is surprised to see Luke, as she thought he was off on a trip with Professor Layton. (She actually calls Layton ‘Hershel’ when she speaks to him!) Brenda is quite happy to let Luke tag along with Layton. Though, she does tell Luke to be on his best behaviour— no reckless rushing around.

Luke mentions in a dialogue box that he got his blue cap from the fancy hat shop in Misthallery. @laytonerd came up with the idea that Brenda may have bought Luke his classic hat. (In the Layton universe, giving someone a hat is a sign of love*.) And from what we see of Brenda during Azran Legacy... yeah, that sounds about right.

I love how something so simple like the Dress Up Minigame can reveal so much about a character. Brenda is elevated from Loving Mother to Hippie Angel Lady. That quirky part of her personality was already alluded to in her character profile. But now we see that Brenda doesn’t just collect odd souvenirs... She has a very unique style as well. (Her top hat appears to be inspired by Hershel’s top hat—again, adding some weight to their friendship!) Luke thinks her whole outfit is just too much, but Clark thinks she looks stunning and it suits her to a T. This is probably just one outfit amidst a huge wardrobe of wacky outfits. Perfect for Brenda and Clark’s wedding anniversary! Clark states that Brenda’s angel outfit reminds him of when they first started seeing each other... and he doesn’t know what he did to deserve her, making Brenda blush. Luke wants no part in this.

Brenda’s favourite colour is yellow. A colour associated with the sun, flowers, hope, cheerfulness and energy. (Like Emmy!) But it’s also associated with sickness, cowardice and deceit. (Again, relating to Emmy!) I wouldn’t call Brenda a coward, but she was a pawn in Descole’s plan and it probably took some time for her to recover from that. But, from her demeanour, she seems cheerful when she’s in London!

Brenda’s obviously quite close to Doland too. He worries about her when they escape from the cellar. It’s not like he does all the chores around the house! Brenda is the one to cook Luke’s favourite meal (roast lamb) when their family is reunited. Brenda knew when something wasn’t right with Doland while Descole was in disguise. She even refers to him as ‘Our Doland’. Awww!

We get several conversations between Clark and Layton in PL4, along with a bonus episode, demonstrating their friendship. But I really wish we could’ve seen more of Layton and Brendas’ friendship. Brenda is very relaxed about Luke going with the professor on his trips. (This isn’t surprising as she is a fan of travelling herself.) Brenda is very similar to Layton in how she picks up on other people’s behaviour. Brenda noticed that Doland was acting out of character, and she noticed Clark was being manipulated. She tried to go to the authorities (though, Third Eye Jakes wouldn’t have been much help...) and so, Descole had to take her out of the picture. She, like Layton, posed a real threat to Descole’s plans. Brenda describes Hershel as being very dedicated and hardworking when he was a student, but he’d also disappear for days on random adventures. With Brenda being a traveller herself, that’s another thing she and Hershel have in common!

To this day, I’m still not 100% sure what Brenda does for a living. In Luke’s Family section in The World of Professor Layton, it’s mentioned that Brenda was ‘also Professor Layton’s classmate’. I’m assuming this means she studied archaeology as well? During AL, she talks about how she’s going to Gressenheller’s Library to do some research for a paper on plate tectonics... I thought that had more to do with geography than archaeology, but who knows? Maybe she does both! So, she might either teach at Gressenheller like Clark and Layton, or she has returned to university to do some studies of her own. She doesn’t seem to work in the same department as Clark, at least. She ‘drops by’ to see how Clark is doing, and to get a look at his department’s cutting-edge technology.

Brenda, like Professor Sycamore, is partial to the odd pun! She then proceeds to give them a puzzle— ‘Mutual Meeting Place’.

It’s about four friends going to the theatre! ...Four friends. Could that possibly be a reference to Layton, Clark, Brenda and Claire? The girl in the puzzle picture also just happens to have red hair and she’s wearing green! (I just made myself sad.) Unfortunately, Claire doesn’t get so much as unnamed reference when Clark, Brenda and Layton talk at Gressenheller, but it’s easy to imagine Claire was close with them back when they were students.

I’d like to think Brenda was particularly good friends with Claire. (They may even be a rare ship of mine...) *Who else was obsessed with quirky styles, and bought a hat for someone she loved? Brenda’s top hat in her Dress Up costume looks just like the hat Claire chose for Hershel. Brenda has an interest in new technology— imagine how many hours she spent discussing science with Claire! “You want to be the world’s first time traveller? Sure, go for it!” I find it quite significant that Claire’s death— and the institute explosion— were referenced in PL4. (Chelmey’s bonus episode is so hard to watch!) Had the Tritons already lost touch with Hershel (and Claire) before Claire’s death...? I wish Level 5 had given us more content for the Gressenheller gang.

I can’t really say Brenda went through any under-appreciated character arcs, like Katia or Janice/Melina. She starts out as Luke’s-loving-mother... and by the end of the prequel games, she’s still Luke’s loving mother, which is fine! By AL, I guess you could say her relationship with Clark is much happier, if they were fighting before? And in the AL bonus episode, she admits she was initially worried about Luke when he wanted to go on adventures with the professor, but she can see has Luke grown up since then. She even helps Luke choose the blue sweater that he wears during the original trilogy games. Brenda and Clark don’t appear during the original trilogy- obviously, as their characters weren’t invented yet. But we could take this as a sign that they’ve accepted Luke’s growing independence and they still trust Hershel immensely!

There is a picture of the Triton family meeting up with Layton, Flora and the Barde siblings. Luke, Arianna and Tony are looking at a photo, remembering the time they spent together in Misthallery. Brenda is smiling at Flora in the background. Brenda’s clearly happy and, like the Barde siblings, she was able to move on from what happened with the spectre.

@the-triton-family-blog was also a great help for this post!

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101flavoursofweird · 4 years

Note

For the recent ask meme, would you do 001 for Clark/Brenda? Thank you!

((Thanks!))

Clark/Brenda

when I started shipping it if I did: Probably after seeing them actually having a conversation in the Azran Legacy fashion game?

my thoughts: What an adorable/awkward couple

What makes me happy about them: How they’re written in your fics, honestly! I need to read the new chapter for Sea Bird!

What makes me sad about them: Cantabella is like... the mayor of Labyrinthia, right? He neglected Espella enough that she turned her back on him and eventually joined up with Layton. And as it turns out, Arthur was being manipulated all along by Eve! ...I’m not saying people can’t dislike Clark (and Brenda) but I at least want to see more content of Layton adopting Espella and taking her on adventures, with Cantabella never to be mentioned again outside of his untimely death.

things done in fanfic that annoys me: If I’ve ever annoyed any Arthur Cantabella fans by suggesting that Espella (and Eve) left him on bad terms after the game or that Arthur perished, then I’m sorry. Eve isn’t a perfect person either... but if Descole can get off Scot-free, then I think Eve can be forgiven too.

things I look for in fanfic: Back to Brenda and Clark... that would be a mixture of angst over PL4 and fluff where they’re happy. I’d also love to see more Gressenheller era content with Claire and Hershel as well

Who I’d be comfortable them ending up with, if not each other: Clark/Hershel or Brenda/Claire are both good.

My happily ever after for them: They move to America and finally get some distance from what happened in Misthallery. They get to see Luke grow up, go to college, get married—- oh, wait, Luke has gone missing, never mind. Back to England they go to search for ten years!

who is the big spoon/little spoon: Again, either!

what is their favorite non-sexual activity: Brenda holds a fashion show for Clark akin to Ken’s fashion show in Toy Story 3

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101flavoursofweird · 4 years

Note

Series: Professor Layton (or any of the spin-offs if someone's already ask this one), Ship: Ranhengela, Character: Phoenix Wright, Crossover ship: Professor Layton & Ace Attorney, Top 5: Flora, Katia, Arianna, Aurora & Emmy?

Thank you!

Professor Layton-

Favorite character: Currently, it’s a tie between Flora and Henry! (May have something to do with the fic I’m writing at the moment...)

Least Favorite character: The Storyteller. Whenever people criticise Flora’s dad— who did make some horrible choices that left Flora alone and isolated— I glance at the Arthur Cantabella and think... “He did the exact same thing to Espella but worse?” Yes, unlike Flora, Espella was traumatised as a child. Cantabella did everything he could to help her, which is admirable! But it’s the fact that Cantabella took other people, erased their lives, probably giving them trauma, to fix Espella’s trauma. AND IT DIDN’T EVEN HELP ESPELLA UNTIL LAYTON AND PHOENIX CANE TO TOWN. Instead, Espella got branded as the Great Witch and the people of Labyrinthia turned on her. She was left even more alone than Flora was. For as lonely as Flora was, at least the St. Mystere robots cared about her and she had Bruno. Espella had Aunt Patty, her cat, and maybe Rouge who worked at the tavern. And by the end of it, Cantabella survived his illness. Baron Reinhold did not.

5 Favorite ships (canon or non-canon): Ranhengela, Clark/Brenda, Janice/Melina, Luke/Marina, Flora/Her OC fanclub

Character I find most attractive: Janice

Character I would marry: Marina. She stayed with a cult for 11 years just to find out how to free her husband. That’s Henry-levels of loyalty.

Character I would be best friends with: Claire actually reminds me of one of my best friends in real life

a random thought: Where’s the next chapter of Reset, OP?

An unpopular opinion: I love Descole/Desmond, I’ve written a whole AU fic about him, but please can we get some appreciation for Arianna, Brenda, Janice, Melina or Angela as well? I want them to give Descole an intervention.

my canon OTP: Anton/Sophia

Non-canon OTP: What do you Janice/Melina aren’t canon

most badass character: Brenda

pairing I am not a fan of: Layton/Descole— I didn’t like it even before The Reveal. I just don’t understand the whole Villain/Hero shipping dynamic in general. Why would you want to date someone who tried to kill/maim you on multiple occasions? But that’s just my personal thoughts! (Charlie/Raphael don’t count— those two have a Tom & Jerry dynamic.)

character I feel the writers screwed up (in one way or another): Katrielle and Flora in LMJ. Why didn’t Level 5 give us an amazing sister relationship between these two? It still would’ve worked even with Flora’s ambiguous age. She’s older than Kat. I would say Flora’s a SPOILER! character, but then she still appears in the rest of the original trilogy, soo... what gives, Level 5?

favourite friendship: Not my favourite, but I think Emmy and Aurora have an under-appreciated friendship. And they have a lot in common! Both of them were used as pawns in someone else’s plan but they ultimately amount to more than just their ‘missions’.

character I want to adopt or be adopted by: Dalston would be such a cool uncle

Ranhengela-

when of if I started shipping it: I can’t remember the exact moment, but it was probably when I was replaying Miracle Mask and I just assumed Randall, Angela and Henry would all live together at the Ledore-Ascot Manor. (I know that’s not the official manor name after MM but that’s the one I use.)

my thoughts: My OT3s to end all OT3s. I’m not a fan of Randall/Angela on their own, at least what we see of them as teenagers, but I’d hope that Randall matures a lot more when he moves in with them in Monte d’Or. He and Angela would probably still argue, but Henry is there to keep them grounded.

What makes me happy about them: A canon polyamorous ship? In my PL game? Okay, so nothing is said in-game that makes them officially canon... But there’s nothing to suggest this isn’t the case. It’s not like they kick Henry out of the manor, or Angela moves out of Monte d’Or with Randall. I like how it’s left ambiguous, so fans can make what they want of it.

What makes me sad about them: We never hear from them again after MM

things done in fanfic that annoys me: Not so much as annoys me, but I feel sad when Dalston doesn’t get so much as a mention. He’s their friend too!

things I look for in fanfic: I’ve still yet to see a fic with a Ranhengela WEDDING/married life. I may have to write it myself

Who I’d be comfortable them ending up with, if not each other: Ranhen or Hengela are both good. There’s also Emmy/Angela! Or Dalston/Henry, or Dalston/Randall if you like rivals to lovers. Also, Desmond/Henry!

My happily ever after for them: They get married and live happily ever after in Monte d’Or and start a family.

who is the big spoon/little spoon: Henry is the little spoon with Randall and Angela on either side of him

what is their favorite non-sexual activity: Gardening or horse riding!

Phoenix Wright-

How I feel about this character: My knowledge on Phoenix Wright is based on PLvsAA and a couple of playthroughs I watched. From what I’ve seen in PLvsAA, I really like Phoenix! ...But not enough to make me by the Ace Attorney games.

All the people I ship romantically with this character: Layton/Phoenix! Good ship.

My non-romantic OTP for this character: Phoenix and Maya, Phoenix and Luke, Phoenix and Trucy! I do love how he adopts Trucy and that might just tempt me to get the game she’s introduced in.

My unpopular opinion about this character: From an outsider’s perspective, I can’t see what the big deal with Phoenix/Edgeworth is? But again, that could change if I actually played the AA games.

One thing I wish would happen / had happened with this character in canon: I wanted to see more Ace Attorney references/lore in PLvsAA... like Maya’s spirit channelling, but no.

my het ship: I guess I could see Phoenix hooking up with Rouge, the tavern owner in PLvsAA?

my fem/slash ship: Phoenix/Layton

my OTP: Phoenix/Layton

my OT3: I don’t have one

a head cannon fact: Phoenix remains in contact with Layton for many years after PLvsAA

Crossover ship for Professor Layton & Ace Attorney -

As mentioned above Layton/Phoenix but of course there’s also Evespella!

Top 5:

Flora, Aurora, Arianna, Emmy and Katia (But they’re all amazing and deserve more love!)

#Long post #sorry this is so long #answers #Ranhengela #Flora/OC #Clark/Brenda #Layton/Wright #Laywright #Janice/Melina

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101flavoursofweird · 4 years

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Secret injuries would be interesting for some good Flora angst

((Thank you for the suggestion and I’m sorry this is late! I already used the ‘Secret Injuries’ prompt for Rook and Bishop whump... so I decided to add this to my new series about Flora— Put Yourself Back In The Narrative. It still contains Flora whump and angst... Flora secretly misses the professor and Luke, but Kat helps her realise that she’s not alone in that regard! This also contains some criticism of Layton’s decisions during the Relics investigation from Flora’s perspective. I hope that’s ok!

Spoilers for the anime and most of the series below! It starts with Flora writing a couple of letters...))

Em,

It's a relief to hear that the agency aren't involved... I still can't believe the professor never mentioned them! After everything you and Uncle have told me, I hope we never cross paths with those vultures. Don't worry— I memorised Grosky's phone number and I made sure Fen and Kitty did too.

Though, at the same time, it's disappointing that we've you've exhausted another lead.

Where will you be investigating next? Is there anyone else who might hold a grudge against the professor? All of the people I can think of are in prison... well, except for one, but he wrote to me insisting he isn't the perpetrator. I'd be more inclined to believe him if he spoke to me in person!

Maybe you could come home and help us track him down? Kitty said she misses her favourite aunt!

And we could make up some better codenames while you're here.

You stay safe too!

Flora

To Our Wise Guardian,

Thank you for searching for our reclusive father and looking after our restless uncle.

I trust Miss Altava with my life. If she believes the agency aren’t to blame, then I believe her. I don't care what she did in the past anymore then I care about Uncle's past. She wants to find the professor just as much as he does.

Please remind Uncle of that, and don't let him burn down any trees. Climate change is a real thing.

If you aren't having any joy with the Azran sites, maybe you should take a break. (It sounds like Uncle needs it!) There’s a park just across the road from us where you could land the Bos airship.

Fen would love to talk to Uncle about this device he's been working on. And Kitty has been begging for some new books...

Until next time,

The Layton Clan

Dear Brenda & Clark,

We're doing alright here, though we'd be lost without Rosa!

Alfendi has been given some extra time to complete his end-of-year project. At Kat's last parents’ evening, her teachers said she can be quiet in class but other than that, they're pleased with her progress.

Yes, Grandma Lucille is home now— we went to visit her and Grandpa Roland the other day. I just received Kuri is still with her family in Japan.

I feel awful for Marina's family... Please tell them that they're welcome here in England as well. I'm sure that wherever they are, Luke will protect Marina with his life.

...Arianna mentioned Tony's wedding. We'll all have to go dress shopping together. Kat's already decided she wants a yellow dress. (You might have some competition, Brenda!) Can Clark help Al choose a suit? He's a nightmare to shop for!

We can't wait to see you both. If you need help with the move, just give us a call.

Love,

Flora, Al & Kat xoxo

Dear Arianna,

Don't worry about the late reply! You should see my desk— there are SO many letters I haven't even opened yet! I wish I really wish Luke was here. He’s so much more organised than I am...

I miss him too—

The ink was smudged from Flora’s tears. She tried to hide it by scribbling out the last line, but there was no saving the letter now. Sniffing, she crumpled the paper into a tight ball and threw it at her bedroom wall. She didn’t bother aiming for the overflowing plastic bin.

What a waste. If Alfendi or Kat had done that, she would have tutted at them. They couldn’t afford to be wasteful, even with the emergency savings their father had left them…

Flora squeezed her black fountain pen (a twenty-first birthday gift from the professor), wishing she could snap it in half.

He had planned for this. He knew he’d be gone for so long and there was a chance he would never return.

Flora hadn’t come to say goodbye to he and Luke the day they set off, but Rosa had.

“What’s the point in searching for the girl’s father, after all these years? Why take the risk? Don’t you love Kat, Professor!?”

Yes, of course he did, but he wanted to solve the mystery behind her family. Solving a puzzle about a bunch of rocks was more important than raising his daughter, apparently. He had adopted Kat and now he was leaving her behind.

Flora huffed out a tearful laugh. She, more than anyone, should have seen it coming. But she had believed (assumed) it would be different with Kat.

The professor had taken Kat in when she was a tiny baby. A baby couldn’t be left home alone or sent to school. Parenting was a full-time job (as Flora was well aware these days).

Luke had laughed when the professor first announced that he would be Kat’s father.

Everyone, Flora included, had expected the majority of responsibility would fall on Rosa. Or, in Rosa’s absence, another eager friend or family member. (Grandma and Grandpa Layton, Uncle Desmond, the Monte d’Or gang…) The babysitting offers came flooding in much faster than when Alfendi was little. A newborn baby was far more appealing than a grief-stricken child.

Flora would have helped look after her siblings even more, had she not been so busy preparing for university.

But, in the professor’s defence, he had refused to take on any new cases and he had reduced his work hours. When he couldn’t escape his office at Gressenheller, he would bring Kat with him.

He had chosen the name ‘Katrielle’. It was an unusual name, but it went well with ‘Alfendi’.

You would think eight-year-old Alfendi would be jealous of all the attention his new sister was receiving. It was quite the opposite. By spending more time with Kat, the professor spent more time with Alfendi; trips to the park, the library, the museum…

Flora would join them whenever she got the chance. Kat was the glue that brought them all together.

The professor had ‘officially’ adopted Katrielle Layton when she turned three. It seemed he had given up on finding her biological father…

And then Luke (Darn him!) had to stick his nose back in to the Relic Stones business.

He had married Marina in secret just so they could move to England without the professor’s knowledge. Consequently, Flora had been kept in the dark too.

That hurt. After all these years, Luke still didn’t trust her.

She could have assisted him with the investigation. She wouldn’t have told the professor…

Luke had shut her out, along with Marina. (Poor Marina…)

Thankfully, Marina had sought out the professor as soon as Luke went missing.

The idiot had gotten himself caught by Don Paolo. (Yes, a similar fate had befallen Flora once… when she was fifteen. Luke was twenty-five, trained in karate and he should have known better!)

After Luke’s rescue, he was dragged back to the Layton household for a family reunion. Flora had given Luke an earful— “YOU DIDN’T INVITE US TO YOUR WEDDING AND THEN YOU ABANDONED YOUR NEW WIFE?!!”—before she hugged him. She had thought that would be the end of the whole Relics fiasco.

She’d thought wrong.

The professor had gotten involved after that. Family outings were pushed aside in favour of the Relics Stones.

At Alfendi’s eighteenth birthday meal, the professor and Luke were trading research notes under the table.

Flora found a house with her girlfriend, Kuri. The professor never once visited them, despite Flora’s many invitations.

The day Luke left for his journey with the professor, Marina had called Flora, crying because she and Luke had fallen out. Flora had gone to comfort her. (That was the last time Flora had any contact with Marina.)

Flora didn’t blame Luke as much as the professor. Luke was a young man fresh out of university— reckless, full of heart and loyal to a fault. He had watched Kat’s birth mother die and now he wanted to scour the world for answers. But, as Arianna had said, the world was so vast…

When Kat was born, Luke had been a student— too young to look after a baby by himself. So, the professor had accepted the role of being Kat’s parent.

The professor couldn’t just adopt a child (three children) and run off ten years later.

Kat wasn’t a puzzle that needed to be solved. She was a little girl.

A girl who never stopped eating sweets, but enjoyed going to the dentist if they would give her a sticker.

A girl who still hoped Santa and the Easter Bunny were real, even if the Tooth Fairy was fiction.

A girl who practiced her dad’s ‘detective’ poses in the mirror.

A girl who didn’t like tea, but still insisted on drinking it.

A girl who could hold a heated debate with her older brother (eight years her senior).

A girl whose family couldn’t afford a dog, so she stopped to pet every stray she met on the street.

A girl who thought people would only befriend her because of her last name. A girl who feared those friends would leave her when they learned of her father’s absence.

A girl who dreamed about her dad every night and woke up in tears.

A girl who was always trying to make her big sister smile…

“Hey, Floor…?” Kat knocked on Flora’s bedroom door, but she didn’t wait for Flora to answer. She burst in to see Flora wiping her eyes. Kat wondered, “What’s for dinner?”

“I, erm… I thought we could have lamb stew,” Flora suggested, standing up from her desk chair.

“Lamb stew? That’s Uncle Luke’s favourite!”

It was actually roast lamb… Flora could feel her eyes burning again. She turned away from Kat and tidied her desk. “I’ll be down in a minute,” she said distractedly.

“I can help you clean up!”

“Don’t worry, Kat—“

“Have you been writing more letters…?”

Flora glanced at Kat. Kat was picking up the ball of paper that had missed the bin— Arianna’s letter. Flora gasped, “Don’t...!”

Kat, ever curious, smoothed out the letter and read it to herself. She frowned when she reached the end.

Flora sighed. “No one was meant to read that…”

Kat carefully placed the letter on Flora’s desk. “I miss him,” Kat mumbled. “And Dad…”

“I know…” Flora touched Kat’s head. “I do, too.” Her words were mainly intended to reassure Kat, but Flora meant it.

She missed them— both of them— so much. No matter how much they had pushed her away, she missed them and she wanted them back.

“That’s okay,” Kat whispered, reaching up to grab Flora’s hand. She tugged Flora out of her bedroom and downstairs to where Alfendi was impatiently setting the table for dinner.

Later, Flora would rewrite her letter to Arianna, signing off with:

…I miss him too. It’s okay if you ever want talk about it. I’ll be here.

Sincerely,

Flora

#professor layton #flora reinhold #Katrielle Layton #hershel layton #luke triton #marina triton #Flora is here to FIGHT FOR MARINA #Rosa grimes #layton mystery journey #LMJ #my writing #angst #my fics #Arianna Barde #answers

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