#Practical Dissonance
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WIP ALERT!!!!
#harry potter#ao3#hogwarts#fanfic#draco malfoy#draco x hermione#hermione#hermione granger#hermione x draco#dramione fandom#dramione smut#dramione fanart#dramione art#dramione#wip#Practical Dissonance#makingTime#marriage law#marriage#marriage fic
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youtube
don't feel like uploading it separately here so here's just the yt link lol
made a proper talkloid again after a million years for rin/len/iku's bday (even if a bit late but fuck it)
#my video lol#talkloid#vocaloid#utau#kagamine rin and len#kagamine rin#kagamine len#acme iku#oliver vocaloid#ugh dont feel like tagging anything else. does this need any warnings???#and now for soemthing more lighthearted lol. tonal dissonance strikes back my fave. the iku gore post before this and now silly 💀 lol#anyways i love talkloiding fr... its like playing with dolls but even better lolll i missed doing this. i need to do more of this#its annoying as fuck and so time consuming but its always fun to watch the final product#i will say tuning len to make him sound like he's having a mental breakdown lowkey was really fun LMAOOOO#i figured out how to do that by accident and i wanna keep testing shit like that out. making vsynths sound sarcastic is also rly fun#maybe i really just need to keep on with that. cause as much as i do want to make nice covers or whatever maybe its not for me#though figuring out shit for song tuning has in turn helped me figure out things for speech & viceversa. so hmmm#i need to keep practicing so i can get better... bc technically this is all with purpose theres a deeper reason why im talkloiding#and every one i make is a step closer to the final mission. but we'll see if we get there soon some day... it will take time but one day...#also i need to get better at using aviutl lol figurign out some of thsi shit last min was NOT IT but we're getting there...
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@akfhakfnsk you're in luck! i've still got all the layers to reconstruct (deconstruct?) the process of this one- well up to the point where i gave up, so, post-mortem time because there's always something to be learned especially from failed projects
planning: must have been intended to be a screenshot study? but with additional elements (the menacing storm cloud is definitely referenced from a photo), and a completely different color palette. so not really a study at all. you know how some people just have to make things harder for themselves xD
2. blocking in the values underneath the sketch: honestly i'm still struggling to see values in fully colored images, so some kind of thumbnail is a must. this is the stage where you can still make large compositional changes, after this it only gets trickier. the cloud had the most reference to draw from, all the other values could be made up just to compliment it. looks like there was some thought to atmospheric perspective at this stage (the in game haze providing both some atmospheric perspective and…haze) but the change in value between the distant buildings isn't a lot sooo ikd
3. color pt. 1: all done with one squarish brush (a little angled?) at varying sizes on a new layer over the grayscale. and the addition of the abattoir and graveyard that surely wouldn't come back to bite me?? also the color choices are a mystery. from the workshop to the abattoir makes sense, orange red transitioning to a cooler purpley hue and less saturated, but the stacks farther back going from orange to yellow green? the cool greens getting more yellow as they recede? lord what is happening here??? yes, different atmospheric conditions (fog, pollution, ash, pollen, PLAGUE etc.) could be exaggerated with different color shifts, but idk idk, the choices here…very verdant and summery
4. color pt. 2: variations on a theme. small dabs, with the same previous brush, to break up large blocks of color with colors that are approximately of the same value and saturation, but different hues. the more the hue shifts, the more noticeable it is. differing the amount of variation could also be used to draw the eye, rather than have a uniform amount of variation across the whole image. also, adding color dynamics to a brush would help randomize this effect more
5. blending: and that's where it fell apart. look i like the control that having to manually blend colors gives you BUT I ALSO HATE IT. pressure sensitive brush settings? that's for people with fine motor control! no brush dynamics just low opacity/ low flow scribbling. 'blotting' does kind of describe it. sometimes it works, sometimes it does not. best to have some clue of the techniques you'll use when still in the planning stages instead of winging it
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2025 is going to be the year of better brushwork but here were some techniques used in 2024:
#plein-air-in-progress#the execution was not great but there was something there#some ghibli lusciousness perhaps#which does feel a bit tonally dissonant for pathologic#and yet#now i kind of want to redo it just for practice
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2 am post belschine magnet
#Castlevania#hod#harmony of dissonance#cvhod#castlevania harmony of dissonance#maxim kischine#juste belmont#belschine#my art#drew this in an aggie ... goidnight#maybe. maybe ill use it for painting practice tomorrow. the world is so vast#i have better Castlevania art ill post more tomorrow
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youtube
An improvement of nearly 4 minutes compared to last time! And it's still sloppy lmao, including an unintended save that if removes would probably push my time under 31 minutes
(in my defense, recording leads to input lag :\)
Have I mentioned lately how fun Maxim Mode is? <3
also holy shit that death fight was perfect, i will never achieve it again
#castlevania#akumajou dracula#harmony of dissonance#maxim kishine#there is actually another route i could take#it goes from giant bat to minotaur 2#perhaps i should practice it but this one feels more natural to me now#also now my biggest obstacle to decency is devil#i hate that boss so much#yeahhh hod's bosses are... are.#Youtube
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the way people took some of the most fundemental parts of humanity and mangled them into tools of suffering. love and the need for companionship, the desire to have children, sharing food and cooking as a show of affection, etc. and traditionalists, instead of trying to restore these joys of life, double down and fight to make them as soulless and miserable as possible
#i've been thinking about the dissonance i feel between traditional family dynamics and feminism#i can't really put it into words#the things i mentioned above for example are very human#enjoying cooking for loved ones and caring for them is second nature to humans#almost every holiday revolves around cooking and enjoying food with your family#whenever you have friends or family members over you almsot always offer food#to show affection and appreciation#i personally hate cooking for myself but when i do it for my loved ones i begin to enjoy it#yet when i hear tradeives talk about how a woman's purpose in life is to cook for her husband my stomach turns#i feel repulsed#but why#but no it's because they try to turn this human behaviour into slavery instead of just letting people do their thing#they suck the life and enjoyment out of it and what you're left with is servitude#idk i just took cooking as an example but this really foes for anything related to this#despite women being mostly independent in today's day and age we still desire and enjoy these things#but why?#we don't have to do it#nothing is forcing us anymore#feminism counters this by claiming it's due to socialisation#the lingering residue from that bygone era tricking women into believing they want it#but that doesn't feel entirely right to me#those things are very fundementally human so saying that people desire them only because they are socialised to believe they do is wrong#the ones who are socialised into believing what they believe are the traditionalists who attach a purpose to these behaviours#rather than viewing them as simple human behaviours#they view women cooking for their families as “her purpose” rather than a human behaviour#they resteict men from practicing these human behaviours because “it's the womans domain”#they apply structure where there doesn't need to be any and sucking the life out of people by doing so#traditionalists are the ones who are indoctrinated not regular women who enjoy something that happens to be bastardised by them#mine
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wips
#i need to make a bigger bloodless one it’s too small compared to happy#but i carved it on the back of the happy one anyway so it was just practice#the circles are…. very hard#the other one is dissonant whispers :)#漫言
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god today has been so long and i havent even bitched about my therapy session which are becoming like pvp sessions
#its so interesting getting therapy as a practicing therapist discussing past awful therapists and not respecting the current therapist who#is also telling me too much about her current stuff in her life while also discussing my own cognitive dissonances its just like a messy#bitchoff??? like sorry Karen (not her name) but i dont connect or trust your judgement because of the continuing bad takes on how I should#n e ways... i need a queer therapist and someone with less countertransference lol#its a little my fault for seeking therapy/supervision from her but still. im sorry i dont want to learn about your marriage or self esteem#during my therapy session i pay for
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YES YES YES I LOVE THE IDEA OF BOND BEING TAUGHT HOW TO WALK TALK AND ACT LIKE A GIRL also i have watched that spot and its funny because a few days before that i told my friend that i want bond in a skirt and not as in female 007 but as in him being forced to go out dressed like a woman for some reason 😭 guess i have good manifesting skills or whatever
– the forcefemming anon [maybe i should start signing off with an emoji, let it be 💄 cause you know ;))))]
😃😃 there is sooo much unplumbed potential here 👀 imagine his like natural skill for chameleon'ing warring against a lifetime of ingrained habits, mannerisms, and instincts. there's a LOT different about adapting his own body language to a cousin role of his main persona versus trying to fit on an entirely new skin. and of course, you KNOW he's going to need to practice a LOT before the actual mission so that he's actually comfortable in the role when it comes down to it. the breaking-in period of the new skin along with the heels, so to speak. *rubbing hands together gleefully*
and lol, isn't that funny how that happens sometimes? these like amazing moments of serendipity? and now here you and I are 🤝💪
#asks answered#anonymous#recreational forcefemming#forcefemming anon#.........he should stay with Q during the breaking-in period so he has like a practice partner#like someone to interact with to practice staying in the role#of course he would also do the normal like coaching sessions & outings to practice etc#but I think it would be fun if he's like. I need to stay with someone so I know I can keep it up. it's different doing things around#someone else vs alone in your own flat. so of course how could Q say no to that (in the name of the mission#and for Bond it's like. practice but also a sort of comfort/reassurance/familiarity#like it's Fine if it's Q. and also practicing with/around Q would be a LOT easier on him that people he doesn't instinctively feel#like he can trust#(imagine how eerie it would be for Q. but also maybe strangely sensual? like not even necessarily in the forcefemming aspect but like. the#amount of trust that Bond is explicitly and implicitly showing him. the like vulnerability he's displaying. I think it'd be jarring cuz of#the dissonance but also very very heady. which would create suuuch an interesting mix for Q's end too)#(but also. yes I would like for it to be a sex thing too lmao)
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okay over-involved asa timeline.
9:24 - born to two circle mages in ostwick. immediately taken to be raised in a chantry, per custom.
9:29 - develops magic a little after his fifth birthday :\ he's packed off to kirkwall's circle with absolutely no idea what's going on. thinks he's done something wrong, and now neither his parents nor the maker want him anymore.
9:29-9:37 - this is not a good time for him. quiet and withdrawn as a kid, but becomes more rebellious as he makes friends. absolutely incapable of seeing his friends get treated poorly by templars without stepping in and making things worse, not always in a way that correctly diverts the templars' attention solely onto him. was in quite a bit of danger of being made tranquil towards the end of this time period, in spite of only being 12/13 at the time.
9:37 - annulment of the kirkwall circle. wahoo! he and a small group of mages escape during the upheaval.
9:39 - asa and his friends make it almost two years outside the circle through constant running and clever shenanigans, but are eventually tracked down outside of perendale through their phylacteries. he also transitions during this period "as a disguise" but never leaves that "disguise" after being found. lmao.
one of asa's friends turns into an abomination in an attempt to kill the templars sent to capture them, but it backfires and the abomination attempts to kill everyone there, including the mages.
by sheer luck, two grey wardens are nearby when the fighting breaks out, and they assist with killing it. the wardens are impressed with asa and one of the other mages, lucena, and after speaking with them, offer to conscript them rather than let them return back to a circle. asa agrees but lucena, shaken by their friend becoming an abomination, says no and is taken back to the kirkwall circle by the templars.
asa is too young to officially join the order on arrival, and instead acts as an initiate, helping out full fledged wardens around weisshaupt.
9:40 - the college of enchanters vote to separate from the chantry. asa hears about this. stand by.
9:41 - the conclave is destroyed! asa demands the wardens help the mages. this obviously doesn't happen, and asa is chastised for taking interest in political matters. asa runs away to see what he can do to help.
a lot happens here that isn't especially relevant atm. he helps out runaway mages until the inquisitor ends up siding with them and bringing them to safety inside skyhold.
he returns to weisshaupt, gets his ass handed to him, and is told that they have no place for deserters, and he's lucky they didn't inform the templars (who still have his phylactery) about him. he argues the semantics of leaving and coming back vs deserting. he's not allowed to join the wardens for a while after this due to his general nature and disposition and inability to even pretend at neutrality in a way that doesn't piss off wardens who suck at neutrality in a more morally bankrupt fashion.
9:50 - asa performs the joining at the tender age of 26.
late 9:50/early 9:51 - the thorne grey warden backstory happens and he's immediately in the fucking doghouse again. he meets varric :)
9:52 - present day
#asa thorne#he's my tremendous boy with a chip on his shoulder and a burning need to see justice done.#and he 100% does not understand why people object when he chases after his personal definition of justice at the expense of everything else#like did he not save lives? did he not help people? then shut up about it. assholes.#all that said i do think he has positive feelings towards the grey wardens like... generally? it's why he chose to come back.#like he buys into the hype. he thinks they're heroes who protect the innocent and stand for honor and such#in spite of them getting angry at him for running off to protect the innocent. he doesn't internalize any sort of dissonance with that.#however he has SUCH terrible issues with authority that he's like. just generally against the concept of institutions#due to his fundamental belief that all power once obtained will be exploited by those who wield it#so he's like. grey wardens (conceptual) Great! :) how come i'm having such a bad time being a grey warden (practical)...?#and he doesn't have enough distance to parse it as of the start of the game#anyways. impulsive cocky boy who believes change only happens if you make it happen (often violently)#but the second you manage to defuse his general anger at the world he is so sweets and cute and niceys <3#in a way that's a bit tragic.#like genuinely if the world had been nicer to him he would be the gentlest most conciliatory boy in the world.#there's an impulse there that shines through sometimes before he bludgeons it into silence with his knowledge of What The World Is Like
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#iwtv is so much more fun if you're willing to actually dissect the story and characters and their world in good faith#which also means applying faults to characters as they are actually seen and not exaggerated or diminished simply by a bias#But when there is nothing actually definitive (only assumption to confirm) you can't actually say who's doing what w/o some bias involved#and yes a lot of times thats entirely going to be the right assumption because we can definitely infer#But there's a realm to where you do have to consider all possibilities are possible if they are left unanswered#you can place inferences but you can't claim them as definitive if they are just inferences#and other people are just going to have different inferences even bias. But this shouldn't mess with what's definitive about it.#basically taking a good faith journalism stance on it so your not falling into possible problematic biases#there are also functions of vampirism and how it works in this context which do not mirror our world 1 to 1#for instance whereas humans have to live in direct contact with society and its various problems bias and ideologies vampires live on the#outskirts of this. Only ever coming into contact by influencing onto that world by their outside actions or appearances#the human world serves nothing for them except as threat or supply for wants or needs. There's no real connection there.#When mapping vampiric existence onto human existence it can a lot of times lead to problems in trying to bridge this cognitive dissonance.#You can not be in community with humanity when you are by nature a being opposed to it. Which is contentious when you want to be part still#They can be effected by this and effect onto it yes but they are not actually a part of it and never will be.#I'd say if you effect onto humanity positively it's better to have it for the enjoyment of it alone as opposed to seeking human connection#as any criticisms of this connection your trying to seek is essentially denial your own sought humanity as opposed to the object of doing#and this would always be a lost cause#but i think I digress here#there are also cultural beliefs and practices of vampires that are not found in our world such as laws and covens and ideologies#a lot of which are quite actually opposed to normal human understandings of rightness and morality#they culturally are more open to accepting those who are viewed as less than or moral because this is a reflection of themselves#And we can and should certainly point to all of this stuff for what it is I feel
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studying some couture stuff :]
#castlevania#harmony of dissonance#cv#hod#cvhod#juste belmont#maxim kischine#my art#castlevania game#akumajou dracula#... im not used to fashion so i decided to try and practice#i dont think im suited for couture stuff LOL#i didnt use a reference for maxim this time.. he looks a little off im sourey
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MS Paint bullshit for anarchists
#i want a man who will just RAMBLE#writeblr community#practicing for a potential future webcomic?#yes i'm bad at symmetry#webcomic#short comic#help the himbo in my basement is screaming about circular reasoning and cognitive dissonance#loosely based off part of an irl conversation
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sigh- ok so ,,, some context if u want this to make sense,,, basically I saw this Bungo dog tweet earlier (Please watch it, nothing else will make sense if u don't , plus it is legitimately hilarious to me at least </3)
and just,, mmm had to draw kunikida from it because him ruining furry s0k0ku's family (?) and then being put in this outfit (???) fucking had me destroyed- good for him fkjsdhfkjh-
(i have very mixed feeling abt it overall so I may private it later but who knows ogughhhKDJHKDJ)
#kite watches bsd#kite draws#kunikida doppo#idk if I want to tag more fandom stuff KHFJHHH#nothing bad abt the art or the concept imo jut something abt it makes me Feel Not Good#I think its bc it Doesn't Look Like Him but neither does the He in the video thats the whole point#that's why it is -(should be)- funny but oughhhh#I def struggle with same face syndrome and making my character drawing looks unique and im so new to drawing humans#its frusterintg to me when characters don't turn out looking how I want them to#BUT OH WELL#I just need to practice more :flex:#also gave him a bunch of the same moles in place/patterns that I do bc yeah :)#my favorite of mine is the three on the upper arm forming a lil triangle shape#one day I gotta connect them all like lil dots#Uhhh if Tumblr likes this I may man up and post it to twitter as well but maybe not <//3#me: wants to hear what people think of my art#also me: doesn't want people to see my art#are u seeing the problem here#that cognitive dissonance hitting me like a sock full of wet mice-
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you guys ever think about the milgram shock experiments? i think about the milgram shock experiments a lot. they feel kinda relevant right now for some reason. hm
#marzi speaks#marzirants#humans are inclined to follow orders. it is how our brain works#we inherently don’t like starting conflict so we tend to do what we’re told#if we don’t like doing what we’re told to do then we tend to try to come up with a justification for it#in the case of the shock experiments it was ‘i will not be responsible if someone is hurt. it will be the testers’ fault’#we eventually decide to resist when the cognitive dissonance of commiting the action becomes more than that of disobeying#which is at a different point for each person#some people are better at resisting orders than others. this may be inherent but is (by my hypothesis) more likely to be practiced#some people- in an attempt to justify their actions- almost adopt a persona able to commit crueler crimes#one man mentioned being disgusted with himself in the debrief of the experiment#during the experiment he had become almost sadistic- pressing the button more than was necessary and smiling upon hearing screams of pain#they were fake but he didn’t know that at the time#all this to say. we are all incredibly susceptible to propaganda- especially from those we view as authority figures#be it from a government or people we simply look up to#so. when a government-lead genocide occurs. it is not a good idea to blame every citizen of that government for it#chances are any citizen assisting the government fell for the propaganda. chances are you’ve fallen for some of your own#because even with our desires to justify bad things. a genocide is a lot for someone to justify#so . to assume an entire population is cruel simply because their government is#would be. bad. especially if that population already has some separate negative stereotypes about them#which are inherently insiduous and could be dogwhistled in to a lottt of language#um. hold people accountable for sure#but make sure they’re actually responsible for anything first#and be careful not to fall for propaganda of your own. because it is not something that just ‘the bad guys’ make#mkay. getting off my soapbox now. i have homework to finish and a shower to take
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last years oilers/cats final: mattdrai cup
this years oilers/cats final: morality olympics with losers on both sides :(
id rather mattdrai2: 2matt, 2drai.
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