#Rebecca James

[wildestdreamcatcher]

Monroe Girl

Summary: A look into different periods of Elijah and Becca's relationship

TW: Mentions of alcohol and being drunk, toxic relationships, trauma with relationships, breakups

A/N: This is a long fic with a word count of 2138k

August 1960

I sat in biology listening to the teacher ramble about her life, her expectations for the school year, and some other shit I didn’t really care about. It was the first day of 10th grade, and I was already bored and felt bad. My makeup hadn’t turned out right and I felt like my hair was flat. I looked around the room in boredom, trying to focus on anything but this class, and that’s when I noticed him. He wore ripped jeans, a Harley shirt, and black and white Converse. He had long curly hair and dark skin, he was laughing and smiling while talking to Todd about god knows what. 

I knew who he was: Elijah Matthews. He was one of Andrew’s best friends and he always seemed cool. I had talked to him a few times for partner work in class and he always seemed interesting, like someone I wanted to know more about. There were rumors that he was bad, he didn’t care about people but Andrew wouldn’t surround himself around selfish people. I had a hallway crush on Elijah, but it felt stupid to think we’d be together. I was starting to zone out and stare at him when we turned around. He started to smile at me and I blushed like an idiot. 

Todd didn’t come to school the next day and Elijah invited me to sit with him on the table. We were sitting there whispering about music and actors we liked. He told me his favorite movie was “Rebel Without a Cause”, he told me I looked like Marilyn Monroe and that he thought I had pretty eyes. The teacher started to scold us for talking so much but we didn’t care, he was the only thing making this class interesting. That same day, Elijah and Andrew had decided to sit with Ruby and I at lunch. Ruby looked really excited when Andrew sat with us and he did too, it was obvious they had crushes on each other and it never made sense why they wouldn’t get together. I didn’t really pay attention to them though, I just paid attention to Elijah and tried not to blush when he called me “Monroe Girl”. 

It had almost been a month since this had been happening, but I guess my feelings weren’t one-sided. He had come up to me at the end of the day and asked me if I wanted to go to the drive-in theater with him there was a screening of “Roman Holiday” that he wanted to take me to and he knew that I loved Audrey Hepburn. I said yes, praying to God this was a date and that everything would go well.

December 1960

Elijah and I had been dating for 4 months and it had been as entertaining as I had thought. He liked sneaking out with me so we could hook up and make out in his red Chevy Bel Air, he had a huge collection of vinyls from Bob Dylan, James Brown, Chuck Berry, Frank Sintra, and Aretha Franklin. He liked taking me to movies and getting me gifts, he told me I was the prettiest girl ever. Everything seemed perfect, and I was fucking ecstatic to be with him. 

I was sitting in Elijah’s car after Ruby’s Christmas party. He said I looked pretty in my red mini dress with the white tights and gogo boots. He wanted to give me my Christmas presents since he’d b in New Jersey to visit his brothers. I felt special with the way he was looking at me like nothing else mattered, the Christmas songs playing on the radio, the white snow adding to the wintery landscape. He handed me this white and red bag with a heart-shaped locket, a Lesley Gore vinyl, and a card he wrote saying how happy he was to be with me. I kissed him and everything felt right.

“I love you, Elijah.” I could see how he flinched at those words. It was almost as if he was scared. He just nodded and kissed me, like he was trying to distract me from everything.

Maybe he just wasn’t ready to say it back yet and I guess I would wait until he did. 

March 1961

I was trying not to be pissed Elijah, not tonight. He was upset because his mom had made him leave so she could fuck her boyfriend without him being a bother to her and now he was getting drunk at this party he wanted me to come to. He did this whenever one of his parents would make him leave the house, I guess so he could get his mind off of everything and so he could stay in a warm house with food and drinks. I was watching him in the kitchen, he was supposed to be getting me the coke I wanted seeing as how I had to be the designated driver because he was going to be too drunk to drive. He was standing there talking to some brunette who was batting her lashes at him, laughing at his drunken humor, he was eating it up too!

I could blame his flirting on the beer he was drinking but it wasn’t the first time he had done this. Elijah liked entertaining people, he liked being flirtatious, his ego was bigger than the fucking sun at times, he was overly confident and it was irritating. He didn’t completely see the problem with flirting with other girls but maybe it wasn’t his fault. He had grown up watching his parents having affairs and flirting with other people openly to piss each other off. It was normal in his household so I guess I couldn’t completely blame him.

I managed to drag him back into my bedroom without him falling on top of me. I felt bad for him: he was going to feel like shit in the morning, not only because of the alcohol but because he was going to have to figure out where to stay. His mom liked having her boyfriend over as long as she could and Elijah would just have to pick up the pieces of that. My parents were nice enough to let him stay for a few days but eventually, he would have to go home. 

  He sat on my bed, drinking the water I gave him. I wanted to feel at peace with him especially with the way he was holding me.

“Why were you so pissed at the party, Bec? You were pretty much glaring daggers nto me.” He didn’t sound angry, just confused. I was just going to lie to him. This moment felt too nice and I didn’t want to have this argument, especially since he was starting to sober up. 

“It’s nothing!”

“No, it’s not. Just tell me how you feel! I can’t fix it if I don’t know why your pissed!!” 

A sober Elijah would never push me this hard. He hated arguments, he hated confrontation. It terrified him even if he would never admit that. 

“I’m just mad you were entertaining and flirting with that girl at that party! And honestly, I feel like you shouldn’t even have to ask me why I’m upset because it should be so obvious!” 

I was like word vomit was just coming out. He looked shocked and confused like he didn’t think he was doing anything fucking wrong and it felt infuriating. 

“I was just fucking talking to her! You seem annoyed when I just sit in the corner and don’t do shit at the parties!” 

“You weren’t just talking to her! You were looking at her the same you look at me so what I’m supposed to think when you don’t automatically shoot down girls who are batting your lashes at you or asking for your number?”

 I started crying and I hated it. I didn’t even want to have this argument! I wondered if he thought I was jealous or possessive now. I didn’t want to stop him from being nice, I didn’t want him to stop being social or having friends but it didn’t seem like he was just being nice to her. Elijah didn’t yell: he seemed meeker than normal. He just let me cry and kept apologizing to me.

“Do you love me, Elijah?”

“Of course I do.”

Maybe he did love me. After all: I was the girl whose picture was kept on his nightstand, and whose clothes were on his bedroom floor, he called me his “Monroe Girl”, he let me drive his car and wear his clothes. I was the girl who he wrote songs for. Besides he never did anything like having sex with other girls. He just flirted with them.

October 1962

I wanted to cry right now. Elijah and I had just left this Halloween party and it had ended horribly. We went together as an angel and devil, and now I started to think his devil costume was fitting for tonight. He flirted with another girl, after promising me he would stop. It felt like we had been having this argument for the 2 years we had been dating, and there were only so many times I would let this go. Tears were steaming down my face as I walked into my house while he trailed behind me. I got lucky my parents weren’t home.

“You promised me you would stop this shit but it never fucking ends, now does it?!” 

“I was just being fucking nice to her, Becca!! Why is that hard for you to fucking understand?”

“You always say that! Like I’m just a bitch who doesn’t want you to be happy and socialize! I’m so fucking tired! And you know what’s the worst part of this, Elijah? In the 2 years we’ve been together, you’ve never once told me you loved me!”

“What do you want me to be? I can’t be your fucking prince charming, I can’t be a perfect angel for you! Do you want me to change all my personality for you? And why are you acting like I don’t fucking love you?”

I felt heated and distraught. Elijah made me happy but he also made me so fucking stressed, angry, and devastated and I wondered if this would last another month.

“What am I supposed to think? You’re always acting a fucking fool in front of me, you’re flirting with other girls like I’m not in the same Goddamn room, you’re pushing me away like I don’t even fucking matter! I love you so much, Elijah. I’m in love with you and I want you to feel the same way! I’d marry you if you fucking asked yet you don’t even bother to speak to me unless you’re moaning my name while you’re fucking me!”

I knew that the last part was probably too far but maybe he needed to hear it.

“Look me in the eyes, Elijah! Look me in the eyes and tell me you love me, that you’re in love with me. That the words you write in your songs about me are true!” He wrote in his songs that I was his girl, that he couldn’t live without me, and that I meant the fucking world to him!

“I’m not going to lie to you, Becca! I’m not in love with you, I’m not in love with anyone, I don't think anyone is actually in love! It doesn’t fucking exist! Do you think that people like my parents are in love, do you think that marriage is going to work? It doesn’t work out, Rebecca! You’re either gonna spend the rest of your life pretending that what you feel is being ‘in love’ or regretting the rest of your life being married to someone you hate!” 

I felt gutted when he said that. He sounded cold, angry, and I couldn’t even blame it on alcohol because he hadn’t had a fucking drop of anything but coke. 

“Elijah, I am not going to be the one you project your fear of relationships onto! I thought you loved me, I thought I was gonna fucking marry, but you don’t feel the same way and I won’t settle for a man who doesn’t love me like that. Somewhere out there is a man who will love me the way I love him and clearly it’s not you. It’s over, Elijah. I’m done!”

He didn’t even fight, didn’t protest, he just left and told me “I hope you find that man, Becca. I’m sorry it’s not me!”

I cried when he left. I had given away 2 years of my life with this man and now it was all in a little over an hour. I hope I’ll be ok.

@sadlonelyyogurt @blowflygrls @vommitgirl

[theawkwardwriter64]

Which is your favorite Coroner?

[i-am-a-whimsy-boy]

Murdoch Mysteries Sexyperson Poll, Round 1, Match 6

[incorrect-murdochmysterys]

Julia: This isn’t getting us anywhere

Rebeca: What’s the matter boss? Getting tired?

Julia: I don’t get tired I get results

[rebeccajamesmmromance]

[locuas642]

I never watched James Somerton. but I do remember when there was an increasing criticism ("criticism") of Animated shows like Steven Universe of She-Ra being "female-led queer shows" showing that queer women had an "easier" time getting heard of than Queer men.

And at the time I wasnt sure how much I personally could add to that discussion or how much was my place. but now that I feel I have better words to explain my feelings I can say I always thought it was bull.

Queer women do not have an "easier" time getting heard or getting their shows produced. Steven Universe got cancelled for homophobic reasons, and She-Ra had to be extremely careful with how they made Catradora Canon.

Those shows were also teared apart by "fans" who tried their hardest to make the most bad-faith arguments for these shows.

And yes, it is important to mention, ND Stevenson goes by He/Him while Rebecca Sugar is Non-binary, and that comes with their own set of discrimination, including getting misgendered. At the time, before they were out and everyone acted on the belief they were Cis, the argument was that as queer women, they had an "advantage" compared to other queer men, and also Dana Terrace (who is Cis as far as I know) also received this criticism. Most important, they would be shit takes regardless of that

and it's such bullshit, not just because of how unhelpful it is. How it tries to tear down important works and reduce them as a competition. But because of the deeply misogynistic root on it all: that these shows could only get made for "diversity points." That the only reason they got these shows made wasn't because of the blood sweat and tears of queer people working in an industry that is hostile to them. a negation and erasure of their effort.

[babe-a-tron-queenthousand]

i've been consumed by the craft

sorry guys i haven't been arting because i've been playing too much minecraft lmao

anyways i made these and i think they're pretty cool

i might make alt outfits later (other camper/prom fits)

i'll link them later in the reblogs if anyone wants to download and use them in their game, all i ask is not to repost/edit them. :]

EDIT : THEY'RE UPLOADED CHECK THE REBLOGS :]

[typewriter-worries]

It's world poetry day so here are some (more) of my favorite poems:

What You Missed That Day You Were Absent from Fourth Grade by Brad Aaron Modlin

All Trains Are Going Local by Timothy Liu

Rural Boys Watch the Apocalypse by Keaton St. James (@boykeats)

HOPE YOU’RE WELL. PLEASE DON’T READ THIS. by Lev St. Valentine (@dogrotpdf)

Time of Love by Claribel Alegría

Every Job Has a First Day by Rebecca Gayle Howell

ALL THAT WANTING, RIGHT? by Devin Kelly

Reading by A.R. Ammons

things i want to ask you by Helga Floros

Night Bird by Danusha Laméris

Prayer for Werewolves by Stephanie Burt

The Two Times I Loved You the Most In a Car by Dorothea Grossman

The Yearner by Rachel Long

If I Had Three Lives by Sarah Russell

I Dream on a Crowded Subway Train with My Eyes Open But My Body Swaying by Chen Chen

We Have Not Long to Love by Tennessee Williams

Jesus at the Gay Bar by Jay Hulme

Cracks by Dieu Dinh

and here's part one <3

[sicknessinmotion]

YOU THINK YOU LIVE IN A PLACE, BUT THE PLACE LIVES IN YOU: ON HAUNTED HOUSES

half·alive // fatima asghar // angie hoffmeister // richard siken // unknown // james baldwin // rebecca solnit.

[friendly-neighbourhood-librarian]

The Woman in the Mirror - Rebecca James

A gothic ghost story inspired by The Turn of the Screw.

Eager to escape the haunting memories of post-war London, Alice Miller accepts a job as governess at a remote house on the coast of Cornwall. Her delight with the angelic twins and the beautiful landscape is soon overshadowed, however, by strange happenings that seem to suggest there is some truth to the rumours about the house being cursed.

In present-day New York, Rachel Wright is shocked to learn that she has inherited a manor house in England from an aunt she didn't know she had. Putting her work and relationships on hold, she travels to Winterbourne Hall hoping to find clues about her birth mother and the rest of her biological family. What she discovers is a legacy of madness and vengeance that leads to more questions than answers.

It's a spooky, atmospheric story with some truly chilling moments. Alice was an especially interesting POV to read because as the madness takes hold of her, and we learn about the secrets she's been holding on to, she gradually becomes more unreliable as a narrator.

[konnosaurus]

the little ones so far!!!! do you like the colour of the engines hehehehe

i've been super busy lately so haven't had as much time for doodling as normal but hey ho!!!

SECOND SET HERE

[wildestdreamcatcher]

I haven't really spoken about her that much but Becca is gonna be so important for future storylines so I need to talk about her.

TW: Mentions of divorce under the cut and religon

Becca was born in Tulsa to an upper middle class, southern Baptist family. She grew up close with Ruby and Dylan. She was raised in a slightly conservative home.

Becca had always dreamed of the idea of being in love, working in the medical field and having a family of her own. She grew up watching her parents be happy with the lives they had chosen and wanted that for herself.

She has gotten really into fashion, music, and dancing in high school and middle school. She started doing ballet classes, sculpting, and learning the piano.

During her sophomore year, she and Elijah had started hanging out more. She had a crush on him during her freshman year when he moved to Tulsa. He had also started to notice her more. She liked Elijah because he was interesting, he had similar interests in music, he was entertaining and he liked her for the same reasons. They started dating soon after.

Becca and Elijah weren't really a great couple. Teenage Elijah wasn't a good boyfriend, he didn't believe in the idea of being in love, he had a flirtatious personality and that didn't really match Becca at all who was a hopeless romantic and believed she in Elijah were met to be. They broke up in their junior year.

After Becca graduated, she started dating another guy and marrying him 8 months into the relationship but divorced a year after. After her divorce, she moved to New York to study nursing she could start working as a pediatric nurse. When she was in NY, she had started dating a new man, Cameron Anderson. He was a med student and they got married after 2 years of dating. She and Cameron had their daughter, Alexandra "Lexie" shortly after getting married.

Becca was very outgoing throughout her life. She loved partying, going to concerts, museums, etc. She loved making friends. She was very social and that was kind of a riff in her and Cameron's marriage.

Cameron wasn't really around as much because he was a hospital doctor and even when he was around, he was kind of an absent father leaving Becca to raise Lexie alone for a lot of their marriage. She and Cameron divorced when Lexie was 14. He didn't really want custody or wanted to see Lexie so Becca moved back to Tulsa with her.

Becca was a really good mother. She was still very outgoing even if she didn't go to parties and concerts as much, she always tried to spend as much time with Lexie as possible. When Lexie was 16, Becca had met her 3rd husband Malcolm. They got married 2 years later and they ended up being super happy. Lexie was really happy too.

This is Becca's face claim

Pictures found on Pinterest

@sadlonelyyogurt @blowflygrls @vommitgirl

[drrav3nb]

ALIENS (dir. James Cameron)

+ RIPLEY, HICKS & NEWT being a family

[lastoneout]

I do agree with the people calling Somerton out for his misogyny and lesbophobia but I do want to remind everyone that him treating Becky Albertalli like that was an explicit act of biphobia. Like there is something very transparent about him insisting that lesbians have it easier than gay men only to turn to a bisexual woman and refuse to accept that she's queer at all. That was biphobia in it's purest form. It doesn't make the rest okay by any means and I'm not trying to minimize it, but as a bisexual woman I think it's important for everyone to recognize that he did not just treat her like that because she's a woman who happens to like women, he did that because she's bisexual and he clearly doesn't think bisexual women are queer at all.

Also don't gloss over the transphobia around ignoring ND Stephenson and Rebecca Sugar's gender identities as well. He's not just a misogynist and a lesbophobe, he's biphobic and transphobic too. Acknowledge all of it.

[rebeccalouisaferguson]

Timothée Chalamet as Paul Atreides and Rebecca Ferguson as Lady Jessica in Dune (2021) | Photographed by Chiabella James | Dune: Part One : The Photography (2023) book

[trentcrimminallybeautiful]

Trent Crimm, bringin' that heat.

↳ S01E01 PILOT // S03E02 (I DON'T WANT TO GO TO) CHELSEA